Berner Phone - Michelle Collins: Disaster Dates & Shallowness

Episode Date: February 13, 2019

She stands 6’1” without heels, from Miami, Florida… Michelle Collins! You may have heard her on Sirius XM or seen her on The View. She also is kind of a big deal because she was nominated for an Emmy. But despite all her success in show business, her dating life is all over the place. A psychic told her that she will meet her husband overseas and she’s convinced American guys don’t like funny women. She’s also scared of therapy so that’s definitely not helping. Hannah also opens up about the worst date she’s ever been on. LIVE SHOW (use the code BERN for 50% off): http://www.carolines.com/comedian/berning-in-hell-live-podcast/ Follow Hannah Berner on Instagram and Twitter: @beingbernz Follow Michelle Collins on Instagram and Twitter: @michcoll --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/appSupport this podcast: https://anchor.fm/berninginhell/support Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to Burning and Hell I'm your host Hannah I'm here with the hysterical one and only Michelle freaking Collins Hey guys, it's Mish Hannah, it's great to see you

I'm so excited to have you here I'm so happy to be here. What a fun place too. I just want to to promote that you have this serious show every morning eight to ten don't know how you do it um the michelle colin show very unique name thank you i'll kill you and yes it's on channel 109 i did not come up with the name i wanted it to be like mornings look mesh but that it's like everything is annoying sounding so they were like just do the michelle colin show and i'm like you know when you hear your own name and you're like that's my name insecurity number one we started oh that's my name going into it what is your

biggest insecurity me yeah you know it's funny i think i'm like mildly paranoid i'm very tall and I'm also not a model. What's your actual height? Six foot one. Why do you say actual? That sounded like truly like as though I like, I like falsify. Like don't bullshit me. What's your real, real height?

So I'm six one. Without heels. Flat barefoot. Yeah. Any sports? None. I was raised in a very musical home. I love that.

And so I played violin and my parents who are not athletic at all. And I have a very tall brother who also is zero athletic prowess. Is he single? No, just got engaged and also. don't make me say it on the pod but not just it's okay he lives like in the panhandle Florida he's like divorced it's fine he's great

honestly as long as he's six three I don't care he's six four but listen we have the exact same body he won't hear this right we have the exact same body shape so it's like not for you do you know what I mean but it's funny because I try to get on the basketball team all by accident because

the coach was like you'd be great and it's Miami so it's like intense like the girls are tough yeah and I went to like, I call it my audition. I went to my audition for the basketball team and I wore like, um, I was in middle school, so like 12. Okay. So you still had potential. Really tall. And could you walk straight? Like were you at all hand eye coordination? I'm like graceful in a certain way, but I've never been athletic. And so to this day though, people ask me if I played basketball. I'm like, how dare you? Because that is like the not pretty sport. But then every now and again.

Volleyball's the sexy one. Volleyball's the hot one. Recently, and this is a bit of a brag, but here I go again. Dennis Quaid, the illustrious Dennis Quaid of, of course, the band, Dennis Quaid in the show. Very hot as shit and, like, looking real good and nice. The hot dad. The hot is dead. The hot is dead. Did you play volleyball?

And I was like, Dennis. Dennis Quaid has a crush on you. How dare you flirt with me? Oh, no, but to this day, I think I would have made an excellent tennis player, even though I don't know how to play. I feel like that is physically, it's the game I love to watch. When I was very young, when I was very young, when I was. I was 10 years old. I started playing tennis and I said, dad, I want to go pro. So I don't know why my parents decided to ask my coach, do you think Hannah could go pro? What is that? And he said,

no, she's starting too late like 10 years at like, like I was like nine. And they told me and I went on and cried the entire day apparently. Like I can't remember the last time I was so passionate that I would cry all day about something. Yeah. So I went on to by 14. I was ranked top 15 in the Nation, sponsored by Dunlop, played internationally. Girl, you got that Dunlop sponsorship? Girl, you know, I mean, Dunlop, it's not Wilson, but like, it's still something. What does it do, a dollop, but Dunlop? Isn't that the phrase?

I think that's a sour cream ad. Yeah, it is. Then I went to college University of Wisconsin, but to wrap it around, tennis is a painstakingly torturous emotional sport, but you're a comedian, so you get it. But also physical nightmare. Here's the thing. I don't even go to the gym. Like, here's what people have to understand about me.

It's like, I don't. I just was not raised in a home that, like, encouraged exercise at all. Why is that? I don't know. Jewish families do care a lot about education. Well, that was, and I, you know, listen, I went to a good college. My brother's an attorney. You know, we have nice careers, but it just was not, like, my best friend who was Jewish,

he grew up in a very active home and has, like, a perfect body, and his sisters are all skinny as can be. And I don't know what it is. I think, you know, listen, my parents grew up, one in Brooklyn, one in Israel. my dad always anytime you say bedside he goes no matter what like my dad always will go oh yeah I grew up around the corner from billy joll like I'm like you didn't you actually didn't grow up even near billy joll but you billy joll's it like down east or like if you go out in new york they'll just say things you're like yeah i live a block from him oh yeah big he smalls was shot around the corner from me like you could say that shit new billy joll apparently i'm like there is literally no way that that's true but okay uh anyways so it's to get the whole exercise thing out of the way like the end of that story is we're talking about what i'm insecure about so no it's definitely i wish that i was better about, and I have two things to say about this. Obviously, look, almost all women have body issues, right? And now we're in a wonderful time

where it's like, we're like, celebrate our differences, like, yay, but you know what? That's fun and all great. But I feel like that's like a woman to woman thing. Like, you don't see straight guys being like, yeah, bring me all your big fat hips and you know what I mean by that? Like it's more just so mentally, and I think it's great.

And I actually think it's helped me even, believe it or not, but yeah. It does help for an To an extent, but also, we have to stop thinking that guys just like the skinny model. 100%. And you know what else it is? I think being in New York and then the only other city I've lived in as an adult is L.A., which, I mean, my joke being like my favorite dating app was Uber. I'd be like, oh my God, where from Armenia are you from? Where in Armenia are you from? They're all literally from there. And they're like hot. This is like not a joke. Well, Armenians are very hot. No, I know. That's why I said that. They're all probably princes. I know. And they all have Camry's.

Okay, so no, what I wanted to say, that was, A, you're absolutely true. The whole male thing is a whole other, you know, every woman is fucked up. Apparently boobs are out. Millennial guys like butts. And I, that's bad for me because I've got everything. I've got boobs, but I've got it. It's better to have everything than nothing, honey buns. You're right about that.

Girl, when you're right, you're right. I'm right. No, you're right. But I will tell you this, that I had a friend who got gastric and she looks unbelievable. She lost like 150 pounds. I mean, you know, she was beautiful before. but like really has changed her whole look and I saw her recently and she was getting into the like the fact that ever since she lost that much weight she has to now go to therapy because her issues that she had that she ate to like you know quiet or whatever she thought that once she got skinny those issues would be gone it's interesting isn't it because that's what I think I'm like oh my god if I lost you know 50 pounds like the world it's like the survivor challenge every puzzle piece would just line itself up including professionally like just all kinds of things and the truth is like no actually i love that so much because that's how people are with success i mean

there's a lot of comedians and actors who are like if i could just get that role if i can just get on this show and then you realize no your demons are still there you're still fucked up because of your past traumas if you ever worked it out and being and it's funny it's never about food it's never about weight it's never about guys it's about what's happening deep within you but it's tough listen are you single then i forgot i'm single yeah but it's i mean i have boy toys but i'm single No, obviously, yeah. Well, it's easy. I feel like now the boy twist are easy at a weird way.

And now it's like the relationship here. It's like, that's the whole other thing, you know? But yeah, but you're, but what are your demons? Oh, I love how you're twisting this. I mean, my demons right now are currently that I'm really focused on my career. Well, it's, but that's a real thing. It's not a real demon though. Well, no, I mean, I'm getting into it.

I like to, I want this story to elongate. I mean, how much time do we have left? I'm like, where do we fucking begin? Ken Burns is demons. Take it from the top. Go on. But I, I want to find the right person for myself, but this is the first time I'm actually like mentally doing well. I'm not like, oh, I just need to find a guy to get my happiness.

Of course not. Yeah. So because I'm actually content, people around me are acting weird. People are like, oh, where are you single? Oh, are you not talking to anyone? I'm like, yeah, I'm not. I'm kind of cool for the first time that I'm not like frenetically on dating apps. Why are people like that? Isn't that interesting too? I'm like, for the first time I'm not worried about it. So why are you worried about it? But let's discuss that because that's a really funny thing that you're bringing. up and I that the way that people are around you depending on relationship self-worth like wherever you're at and I hate to bring this friend up again but the one who got skinny

actually lost friends and it's an interesting thing that when you sometimes aren't in a good place those who aren't can't deal with it and in comedy you don't even go there because comedy is so competitive I have a very wonderful lovely core group of friends who happen to be comedians I've known them forever they're my oldest New York friends but you know a lot of people in the business too are like a little bit it's like you know it's a business you know so people a lot of the friendships you read about and see are the fakes fucking things I'm like these people hate each other it makes me crazy because I like operate on being genuine and I'm like if I don't like someone it's very hard for me to swallow my shit and then be like hi I've done it but I don't do it like it's not

my bit one thing I've learned in this industry is that networking is not just giving a card to people and meeting as many people as possible networking is being able to see who's bullshit and who's not and when you connect with someone actually connect like me and you did a video together at Betches and I immediately was like I like her she's weird she's funny we love each other yeah we loved each other got each other's number and now we're here but I've worked with a ton of actresses who like are very famous or very respected who afterwards they didn't really rub me the right way and I'm not going to force it yeah to network but it's interesting because I actually I'm like you and I actually think it's hindered my career because because you don't

bullshit with people? I don't bullshit. I only, I'm, like, that's why I'm here because I really like you. So I was like, oh, Hannah's awesome. Let's do this. But if, oh, God, there are so many people who just sign. And then you're like, I can't. Are you a bridge burner? Do you just, like, burn those bridges? It's okay. I don't burn bridges. No, I'm very, I'm a cancer with a Libra Moon. And those in astrology, get it. Now that you said that. Sensitive. I'm very sensitive. So, you know, what's funny is I'm not a, I don't think I'm a bridge burner, but I do, yeah, I cut off. everyone at home cancers are very confident on the outside very sensitive and emotional inside i'm a mess i'm a mess my name i always tell people it's literally my shell i don't they realize that like in the past six months you're like a crab you love going back into your shell little hermy little herm she has a gorgeous apartment i do gorgeous shell i'm like i'm full herm we're talking about cancer

thank you my apartment is nice that means a lot to me by the way go on what's going on with your love life oh god well we both we both We're talking, I've been seeing this British dude. You are. Well, you know I love British guys. This is like my whole thing. Wait, explain to me again why you like British guys. Because you know what? First of all, they are, I like the look.

Like I find them hot. The accent obviously helps. Very witty, dry humor. But that's the thing. They're so funny. And you know what kills me? Like, I'll walk down. I'll be a British person in like a coffee place, whatever.

And immediately they're funny. Like it's on. Oh, yeah. On the show when British actress come on, rarely. And it has to happen. But rarely are they. like lull free they love to lull and i love that we use that word today yeah of course and especially l a w l for people at home yeah um we're educational we're learning new things i'm a smart

non-athlet one thing i learned about british i've been dating this british guy forever british people have this thing called chat so when you meet someone he'll be like oh that bloke has shit chat so americans don't have a word for this chat means like just you're back and forth so they call it chat where Americans we're like oh that person's cool that person's not but we don't talk about the skill of conversation we have to call it we have to call it band we have to call it band okay yeah like a band yes I think but isn't it cool that they have that it is and I started to realize like I love appreciating a good chat can I ask another um question that I'm just curious about does he drink too much yes he does right oh god you see and that's let's discuss so as far as

dating goes okay so I always like joke about this I have I think an overseas personality which is like much more fun than I am here where and this is just travel this is it's real it's a real thing I've talked about it before but the second your passport comes out you become a new woman it's like I really mean that and I think part of it is and I wonder if like your listeners have done this or if you've done it where when you're just when I'm on vacation it's like nothing to lose vacation but you're not paranoid that you're dumb American I will tell you uh I did have kind of a bad experience recently um as an American in a foreign country that did not And well, I just imagine, like, what's the show, like, drugged up abroad?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, I won't even make a joke about someone who was killed overseas. Okay, here's the thing. Like, literally I'm, like, biting every thing in my mouth, not to say it. No, I would be hard to kill it, but I will tell you that, um. I'm crying right now. No, I love an overseas moment. I also envisioned, like, you going to foreign country and them never seeing, like, an

American woman who's tall like my friend they love it British the British guy I'm saying is six six and he says when he goes to Asia he signs autographs no can I tell you one of the reasons my joke is I'm huge in Japan literally like I am huge there and I won't go there I'm dying to go to Japan but I have to go with a Japanese speaker who will be like no not her leave her they're going to think you're like an Olympian something or like you know trunch bowl I don't even know I'm so worried about going there and like having them just yeah like like pet me i don't want to that freaks me out i swear when i interrupted you so how are you different in foreign countries because i think i'm more confident there and weirdly i feel like i get more attention there i've had like psychics tell me that i'm gonna meet

my husband or whatever partner overseas multiple psychics i've never gone to an official psychic but i've had like people friends who are intuitive yes i've had multiple i've had strangers say to me so do you feel like every day that you're in America. I'm limiting myself. You're limiting yourself? Going back to the British thing quickly. Yeah. They love funny women.

They do. They really do. They don't. They encourage it. He loves my chat. American men do not fucking get me. And I know that that sounds like a weird. And listen,

this isn't therapy. I mean, clearly they don't get me because I'm still single. Do you know what I'm saying though? Like they don't understand. Okay, so I went on a date this week actually. And I don't want to like shit on the guy because like whatever. It's fine.

It's never happening again. I will tell you that much. But. But he was fine. Off air, I'll tell you. Oh, I was like, how long do I have to sit here and pretend that this is going to be a thing? An hour. I made it.

And I paid for my drinks, which my mom would have slapped my face. But that was your, like, seal of don't fucking talk to me again. Am I wrong? For 20 bucks, it's like in the Bronx tail. Boom. Never have to see him again. But like, I don't want to shit on him. He was nice.

It just wasn't meant for me. Do you know what I mean? And, but a big part of it, he's just like, wasn't funny. And I'm like, ugh. And I as a result was so boring. I'm like I can't even Because sometimes you'll have a guy who's not funny But who laughs

You know what my favorite thing a guy does is You want to know what I love Oh I love when a man does the memories Of a geisha laugh I call it Where is it okay to say Where he like hides his laugh for me Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah

He tries to hold it back Because if he loses it It's like giving you the W Yes But he still has to do it That's my foreplay That is like my fetish This is my thing with American guys

Talk to me Talk to me have toxic masculine energy That's where British guys don't British guys I can't. And that is not for me. This is a thing, British guys, like, I'll see his friends naked, running around drunk. Like, American guys don't do that shit. And it's fun. They're much more, like, open with it. Open. They're less intimidated by me. Also, I love a six-six dude because as a tennis player, I actually have an insecurity that I have man-arms. When I was 12 years old, this guy I had a crush on told me I had man-arms. Because I have very, I'll show you, I have very muscular biceps. They're very big. Do you understand that when I, I look like Dolf Lundgren with my top off? Like, I'm actually mad at you that she just, showed me like bugs bunny arm like hanging low jump rope bisap i have literal people show me michelle obama i'm like okay like i can carry when i'm at macy is like buying wardrobe i literally can hold five rachshall clothing in one arm and they like start a room i'm like your wingspan must be incredible

wait yes my ape index six foot four wingspan that's professional athlete i know if you have plus four of your wingspan versus height i'm plus three you're plus three so you're basically basically very close hold on i agree you're really special you're truly special thanks for saying that you realize if it's really nice if my mom birthed you my dad would have just i was very athletic so my dad just went freaking nuts living vicariously through my athletics see my mom was vicariously through my arts and through my comedic career it's both it's sick she she's funny my mother is hilarious i've seen her on your instagram so beyond did what did she do with his her career um she raised us my dad was also a comedian funny enough in the 80s was he

he was but not fully he had like a job who's like at dinner funnier your mom your dad my mom I love that my dad would tell jokes like he was very good at like a guy Mr. Levine flew to Paul in the other way like those kind of jokes my mom will conduct

a full orchestra my mom worked at J-Crew for 11 years and was like a local celebrity in our town I love that we'll go to our bagel place and people will be like Judy hi and she go hey how are you and she's very glamorous tall big hair tons of makeup Hillary Clinton jackets like always looks put together and uh they go oh my gosh great to see we'll talk to you soon she goes and yeah it's so great to see and they go who is a fucking know like she has no idea and everybody knows her she is someone who i think with a different path

would have been famous but the trick her her Achilles heel is that she is not good in front of an audience if she were in this room right now fabulous she'd kill when she uh sometimes calls into my show in the mornings can be funny because it's like the phone yeah i've brought her on stage with me before and it has never not backfired in me but do you think that over with some practice she'd get better it's not for her and it's great for me because i don't i'll never have like the melissa to joan problem you know what i mean it's also great because it sounds like you got her humor but your dad's performance skills that's right it worked out it worked out i love that so my mom is like actually fucking hilarious like she's she's really funny i mean nuts nuts oh crazy

We're all nuts. No, but, like, probably should be on meds. I'm not even being fine. I tell her to her face. I only pretty God they never hear this. But, yeah, she definitely has, like, a psychosis. I'm not saying it to be funny. I'm as serious as I'll be on this podcast.

Seriously, I'm like. But I'm laughing because, like, I learned about my psychosis through trying to understand my parents psychosis in therapy. Yeah, that's got to be tough. You're going to learn a lot about yourself once you diagnose your parents. I have to tell you something. that I went to therapy a couple times and this was in L.A. Wait. Wait. So you've only been to therapy a couple times. Yeah. Oh, you're one of those.

I'm one of those. But I went and I needed it at the time. I really did. And I actually am thinking about possibly going again because in the past actually funny enough since coming back from Thanksgiving, being with them, I've had real anxiety in a way that I haven't had probably in like 15 years. Like I felt like just felt really anxious. Like I feel like I'm on the verge of a possible anxiety attack because there were like a lot of fights and it was really tense and like, you know, they're getting old. And so there's a lot of things and questions and they don't do they don't work so they're like kind of not doing much and it just like there was a lot that I was dealing with when I was home life was a little bit off and it causes you to feel a little off more than a little like I just came back really like I internalized whatever feelings I was having there and like I'm like oh I'm going to end up having an anxiety attack like on the subway like I feel it I know it's coming and it's I love how that's the place where people are like that's where I'll break down. That's when I'll have one person. It'll be a park place on the two, three.

I already know. I know I'm picturing it. It's like Minority Report. It's happened. I grabbed the ball. I looked at it. I'm waving the shit around on the screen. They're going to see me face down in a black can with my legs sticking out my ankle boots, just waving around.

Speaking of height. Yeah. Do you date guys who are shorter than that? I do. Not by much. But I have a whole thing with that. But some guys love tall women, but is it fetishy? Okay.

Great question. Yeah. I dated guys who have fetishized it. I don't like that. I don't think anyone likes to be fetishized. Because then you don't see you for you. Yeah, it's like being in a museum or something. You feel very objectified.

I wonder if tall guys feel that around me. 100%. Do you buy pornography that features Tallman like squashing short women? Because I dated a guy who whipped that out on me like zines, not even like professionally printed porn. They were like homemade zines of. large women crushing men they were pretty women they were just very tall it was like attack of the 50-foot woman yeah exactly like crushing small men and I was just like I need such a nice apartment and I was just like I can't do it I need a car I was like oh I had a psychic tell me once in a past life I was I was an Amazon woman that's nice I am that's great it's a good thing right is the word Amazon an insult though that's a good question because I take it sometimes depending on how people have said that And I'm like, okay, they're beautiful.

I envision like Gal Godot. Well, yeah. The Wonder Women are gorgeous. Which is pretty fucked up. Like, really, all these models are like that athletic. I'm sorry. It pisses me off like seeing Gigi Hadid in a boxing commercial. I get a girl who actually can punch.

Number one. Get Layla Ali in that motherfucker. Seriously, I agree. Yeah. Wait, as far as short guys go, though, two things. One is my dad is shorter than my mom. So I grew up in a home where big woman, a man in Italy one said, um, Papa little you big.

And, and my friend, my friend Stephen and I, we always call it Papa Little You Big syndrome where it's like, Papa Little You Big. This is like for an hour in like a fucking prosciutto shop. I was like, mm-hmm. Anyways. So my mom was bigger than my dad. So I grew up seeing that. So it was never weird to me.

Yeah. But yeah, I dated a guy who's 5-9 fairly seriously. And I liked it as long as they have. I heard shorter guys are better in bed. That's like shy harder. Five-nine. Listen, I'm 6-1. I can't date a guy who's.

like five six because that would look like a pedophilia yeah but five nine five ten listen if they have the confidence if they're funny you know there there are other qualities but the thing is what kind of funny actually works with your funny because like imagine some comedians you date it butts heads like what kind of funny works with you like english men just get it and they're banter and it's quick sometimes I feel like everything he says to me is a little pretentious though like that I really like that feel dumb he uses the word waltzed oh god I just I literally just got turned on. I just literally checked.

He texted me whilst and I was like, are you fucking kidding? Like, I'm from Brooklyn and like I don't even like pronouncing full words. I love that. Where do you mean him? Bumble. Wow. I'm going to London in two weeks, does he? Yeah.

I'm afraid to go to a psychic because I'm afraid of getting told something like that. Like you need to meet your man in Italy. And then every moment I'm not in Italy, I'm like, well, I'm ruining my future. I agree with you. Yeah, you're fucking up. actually also going to Italy, so if I see, but Italy is a very short country. Yeah. And they actually are not kind about my height there. I've been a few times. Italians have a lot to say. Macho issues, yeah. Yeah. No, but I'm going to Amsterdam for the first time, which is supposedly a giant place.

So my question is, when you go, are you going to, like, force it and have your eyes open? Are you just going to be you? You know what's funny? Is that, and again, this is giving me anxiety. Like, I feel pressure now. You shouldn't. Well, so when I go to London, I tender. Okay. Always. Why Tinder and not like bumbler hinge um because on tinder i can be private and only be seen by the guys i've liked i love that do you pay for like a premium it's like 20 bucks a month yeah okay it's worth every penny because i bet i don't like being in the home i don't know i get weird about it nobody knows me but you're also a very busy woman you don't have time to just busy and i just don't like it i just want to be seen by like normal at least who i perceive as being half normal and i can also relocate on tindy

so if i'm going to lundies a couple days beforehand drop a pin figure my life out can i tell you about my previous like terrible date and I want your opinion on this. When? This is two weeks ago. So the guy's six, seven on hinge, former football player. Now that's the first red flag. I don't like that's CTE. The CTE is fucking real. But I'm like I'm an athlete. I was abused as a kid. You were abused as a kid. We have similarities and he's six like eight or something like ginormous. I was going to say almost too tall. Go on. A little too tall. It's a little tall. Yeah. I'm like I'm in this phase where I'm like, Nothing can phase me. I'm just objectifying men.

Like, you want a big butt, I want a tall man. Yeah, I like that. Love, right? Love, love.

So I get there. Oh, my God. Second red flag. They say intimacy is when you laugh at the same time. He laughed a little too long. Do you know when you're like, ha, and he's like,

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Where'd you go with him? He wanted to go to just like a kind of a nicer bar. I like that. So that's a good thing. That's a white flag. Then he starts dropping stuff about like how his parents have a house in Sagaponic, that has two tennis courts.

his apartment is $6,000, but I don't like this. It's weird to bring it up. This is weird. It's very gross. So that's red flag number three, but he's tall. So I'm just like, I don't see them. I don't see them. I need to get stabbed in the fucking eye with this red flag at this point.

Also not to be like an asshole, but straight up like six, eight and like rich. I mean, it's like. And he had green eyes. I like the light eyes. Just God bless. I like it. So I don't laugh as much as you want, whatever. And he's dull, but I don't know.

He's awful. Whatever. The date's fine. And he said he used to party a lot. But now he doesn't. So that's either true or he's sensing to hear if I party a lot. Party meaning like cocaine? Like going out drinking.

The thing is, I'm pretty straight edge. So he's sitting there. We're ready like 10 red flags in and I'm like, let's go to another place where my friend's bartending. We get free drinks. And he goes, okay, I just have to grab my jewel. Another red flag. By the way, that is what you just said to me right there.

I went on a date. I was like seeing a guy and it was very casual meaning like physical. But our first date, he was charging his fucking. Jewel at the table of the bar and he was hot as shit and really tall and in sweatpants but like really hot as shit like you would have been upset and then made me pay for my drinks and I still slept with him

for a long time I was like I just like whatever sweatpants are so hot everyone agrees but it's disrespectful disrespectful on a first fucking day to do that. Fuck you and the charging thing I don't love be in the moment don't think about the future I didn't like it at all and also almost stole three dollars for me because I gave him money like but I was like shaking out of

So do you offer or do you firmly offer? Because I feel like you're paying too much. I agree. When I walked in, he said he had already gotten himself a drink and was like bars right there. That's a real thing that happened to me. Do you actually think that I love that? Did he ever pay?

I will face plant in that park place garbage if he ever listened to this. You don't promote this right at all. Like I need this to say between us. No one's going to listen to this. I punished him so much. That first drink that he didn't buy me, which was like a $5 fucking wine, ended up costing him hundreds. and I'll tell you why because I am actually extremely generous I am I love to split like I'm not

that person I like I like splitting too but it's more the idea in the very first day it's the idea it's like it's an idea and I have to tell you something I ended up I think making him pay for more like and he would get pissed and I was like you're going to pay for this because I was punishing him for how he treated me that first day he doesn't know that obviously that's the thing you let them fuck up in the beginning and then you never let them forget ever but you know what it is what it is um jewel boy oh go on big jewel boy says oh let's go to my apartment which is right next door another red flag yeah i don't like it too close he's bringing girls to this place so i'm like an idiot but i'm putting this together in my mind it's hot so i go upstairs and he you went with him

i know but the thing is okay i should not have to live my life in fear that this guy's going to attack me no but more all the time it's not about attack it's just you were put in a very uncomfortable situation. It was uncomfortable. He put you in a bad situation. Okay, go on. So we get up there, and there's no, like, eye contact or, like, nervous moment. He just, like, goes in. To make out. Very aggressive makeout. Didn't like his pheromones. Didn't like his taste. And it was immediately over. Over. Then he goes on to pick me up, which is fun. I love a King Kong moment. I'm going to shit laughing. He's big. He's big. He picked me up. Yeah. He was big. Did you, like, throw you somewhere or just tell you? He kind of threw me onto the couch. And it was too much. It was too much. No. This

is Sunday at 8 p.m. people. Oh, my God. Shark tanks on. We continue kissing. And I'm already like, how do I remove myself? Yeah. And then he like kind of lifts my shirt up. And he goes, hold on one second. Oh, no. He walks away. He comes back and he puts his head towards my chest and continues to go and snorts cocaine off my tit. Snorts cocaine off my tit. What? Why didn't you let him do that? I didn't know what was happening. Like, I was in shock. But also, who the fuck does that? What is this Wolf of Wall Street?

The day at 8 p.m. You just told me how you don't party a lot. And I was just like, let's get a drink at another bar. This isn't like a crazy night? Isn't it funny that I said cocaine? I knew. Well, you gave it away, which kind of pissed me off. I'm sorry.

Well, bring up how you're an athlete again. We'll talk about it. Anyways, go on. So I'm feeling like this is fucking weird, but I'm in a shock mode. Your body goes into shock mode. Did he offer you some? He knew I don't do it. But still, you're like making out with me.

You're like sniffing it. It got like so weird. And then he goes, I want to show you something. So this is horror movie shit where you. where you're like, don't go. And I'm like, okay. So we walk towards the closet and he shows me a box. Oh, no.

And it has like handcuffs and whips. Yeah. And he's like, I want to dominate you. And I'm like, what the fuckety fuck? No. But I'm already in that mood where like I'm goofy. Like I'm like, I went from happy to like joking like, okay, count down, buddy. Like we're still joking.

So when can I go from that to being like, no, thank you? Yeah. So I eventually was just like, okay, I have to go meet my. friend and he's like can I come I just didn't feel like I could say no but I was going to be safe like I'm out yeah so he comes with me so I was talking about how he loves Trump and like just it's regardless where your viewpoints are like not something to bring up and then I get to the bar and my friends are like he's hot and I'm like no thank you help me he eventually leaves morning after I'm like how do I end this like he was kind of texting me he texts me a link to a porn site wow gross

and I, like, freak out because I'm at work. Also, like, what women, honestly, like, unless you're a paid escort, and I, this is not shaming that person. I'm just saying, unless it's like you're getting paid, like, yes, some women are cool with shit like that, which God bless, and I think it's great. But it's like, he doesn't know you. And then to bring it up, like, after snorting a line off your tit and then just bringing out handcuffs and whips, I mean, it's just, what the fuck?

Well, men are dumb. Then he responds and goes, sorry, wrong text. Really? So who the fuck are you sending that to? Well, maybe then let me give him some credit. Maybe he was texting his ex-worker. All right. I'll give the guy the benefit of the doubt.

So that was the worst state I've ever been on. That's awful. And I'm sorry. And by the way, what happened to you in a way was, it's like that is he's unsari story. I hate to say it. But it's like one of those things where you were put in a position where you like went over to his apartment because it was like, it'll be a quick stop.

Instead of saying, hey, do you want to come like watch a movie or like make it more obvious that it's going to be? It's like, I got to pick something up. Yeah. You went with him trusting that that that's. all it was going to be. Yeah. It turned into something obviously much more intense.

And it's also the assumption because he played professional ball. Yeah. And he's hot. Oh, he was a real football player? So we played football. On my team. The Giants. Wow.

For a couple years. Well, you show me after what he looks like. Yeah. Very hot. But these men are used to, I guess, there's enough women that I guess we're down for that. Well, because, sure, because you know what? They see this athlete.

They see dollar signs and like the life of a wag, if you will. But the problem is this guy is not going to. settle down so it's like you're just there for him to kick the shit out of basically and fuck and like get out i've been through a terror a like terrible relationship that got me really depressed with someone who was super successful and rich and had fame so i'm like oh i've i've gone down this path yeah who is that i can't say it on a half so girls just like what we spoke in the beginning you think being skinny's going to make you happy you think a rich guy's going to make you happy no no you find a man who is kind and

makes you feel like yourself and he makes you laugh and he makes you laugh but also i'm kind of sick of girls being like i want to find a guy who thinks i'm funny too uh well it wouldn't work for me if i found a guy who didn't think it was funny and that's why i was with a guy before like honestly like that is why like but you can't fuck them i know but that's that's god's plan that is no that is why you know that there if there is a god he wants us cursed because like boring people find each other all the fucking time like boring dummies love each other is that what's happening? Because I have a unique personality. You have a unique personality. We rub people in unique ways. But only in this country. And this goes back to my point. Like, I'm telling you, when I go,

my mom's from Israel, a country full of strong women. I mean, it is like a powerful woman. Military. Military. And the men are also very macho. So it's kind of just strong people. I mean, it's aggressive. Very aggressive. I give it to you. Although I do think that it is not as aggressive as the Israelis that have come to America. Like, I find that, like, don't judge the country by those people. yeah um two days in if you visit you acclimate to like the vibe okay because actually people are very lovely there and like it's you know keep politics out of it would you marry an israeli man i don't think i would okay although i will tell you that i did very well for myself this trip and hot as shit like guys that are so hot can i just put this out there they're so hot that when

you're on tinder like after a while you're almost sick of it you're almost like oh god another another symmetrical phase no there are no jewish people in this country exist on the plane of hotness that Israeli men and women are the best looking it's just like Because they're also like kind of tan always They're tan they're fit

Yeah But there is a different gene pool That they're cooking with there That there's a different falafel canister No because I had a good experience And a really bad experience And they're sort of interlinked But that being said

The good one was like Honestly it was like Oh my God like he's amazing And I honestly feel this is actually This is actually kind of a funny story I really felt like we bonded and like we had honestly one of the most incredible nights together. It was like awesome like on the beach like May I got like it was just like it was like I felt like I was 22. Yeah, it was The Bachelor.

Right. And I felt so great and I felt like pretty even though you know after he left I like looked in the mirror and I looked like the honeymooners moon. I was like nah, nah, like Jackie Gleason's corpse washed up on the beach. But anyways, but he was like so hot. And so then I was like, but we really had these intense. conversations where is it rose-colored conversations or were they actually in like real like beautiful like I'm telling you it was it was listen I've been around the block many times it was different like it felt different right okay and so then I'm like at the airport the next day I like left town the next day and I was

just like I don't need to tell I barely eating I was like I'm amazing it's like blah blah and I like fly back to New York and I'm waiting to hear from him and days are passing and days are passing and I'm like are you fucking kidding me like on WhatsApp I'm like you're not going to just say hey did you get back to America okay you fuck what's up is the easiest fucking app ever uh like and so I was having lunch with my friend a week later and I was like you know I'm like really pissed that I didn't hear from him it's just shitty like after everything we shared like you can just be like hey did your plane crash and so I wrote to him and I was like hey like it's so it's so birthrighty what I'm telling you're right it's so birthright

oh you could throw up I was like hey like I was like meanwhile I'm like an deli like in a madison avenue you're at a bodega like yelling at people the cats like typing it with this pop I was like hey like I made it back like just got over my jet lags something like that I didn't even know I was like I love what you're answering your question he never asked you're like

I'm doing good thanks no I know anyways and I was like because I was desperate for connection like how fucking dare you and his dick was good girl real nice it was just like honestly it was like passionate and like dirty but romantic

I feel like you're still not over this wait that's not nice so hold on so I said no I'm over when I tell you how it ended so then I'm by the way I'm going back in like five months so I'm like is he serious okay so I said hey I was like um so great to meet you

no I know what I said this is so cheesy I was like hey like thanks for making my last night it's so great and I was like I think that's all I wrote and then he just wrote back instead of saying like nice to meet you whatever two days pass cut to me. I'm like Brooks was here

like noose dangling Shawshank reference anyways and he wrote back thanks okay and he wrote back um my pleasure with a wink I was like are you fucking I hate him kidding me oh I hate him my pleasure what did I pay you by the fucking hour dude like fuck you and by the way

let's just say he left happier than me you know what I'm saying like I gave him everything I know that I'm not like viewed like that but I can be a lot of fun you know and I was just like okay so you can give oh my god me please you should be so lucky okay honestly yes no I'm very nice so did you respond to that no of course not I was raised in a fucking home are you kidding me like my mother would literally burn everything I own if she if please so I did not but the point is but that's very Israeli too just be like well fuck you he like grew up on a farm it's fine um I feel like this

has turned into just like our shit show these are my demons though if you want to know about if you want to know like I've never been as single as I am now but I'm also like so refreshingly okay with it. I mean, you have to be. You have to be. Because otherwise you're going to like be fucking horrible and your friends are going to hate you. But you know, of course you should be happy. Listen, you're beautiful. You're funny. Like what do you have to even not be happy about? Thank you. Yeah. I started doing this new thing where like I wake up in the morning. This is going to sound super corny. I already feel

it. I change the tone of my voice. I'm like so. I know. Mr. Rogers. Greet me. So I will literally like hold my own hand. Oh, God. Or like I'll like hold myself. And I, it's like, I love myself but that physical touch and I bought a cat. Oh I got a cat. I adopted a cat. Did you? I stole a cat. She was, her name is butter because her eyes are like buttercotch. She was found in a dumpster in the Bronx. No.

She's like a little bengaly. She's, she's gorgeous. Okay. It's like a child. Everyone's cats, you know, is it a kitten or like a... It's three months. Oh, do you have a picky? It's over there. We'll show after, but um, who needs a man? But that's like the first step until like into the grave. I was just letting you know. It's why I actually don't have a cat. podcast and I have a cat who the fuck needs a man I want to finish with one final game seven deadly sins it's time to play the seven deadly sins oh my god okay I'm ready

you excited do you like games love games it's actually not really a game I just ask you questions but what do you greedy about ooh um bargains weirdly like I love is that a weird answer Queen? Not coupons, but I am a, I, my addiction, I would say, like my greed is, yeah, finding bargains. Like, I'll buy shit that I ended up not wearing, but because it was like a good deal. Are there any places you recommend? Oh my gosh. Well, if you're in Florida, Sawgrass Mills by far, I love an outlet. It's really, it's bad, but like greedy, I want to give you a better answer because that's lame a little bit. I mean, it's cute. It was a cute answer. It's really true. What do me really greedy about? Like, what do I collect? Or not even physical, like emotionally, what are you

emotionally greedy about. I mean, attention and laughs. Yes. Goes without saying. Yes. Do you ever hit a limit? Oh my God. I live by myself. I mean, listen, I go home and I shut down. And you are a crab. I crab it up. Yeah. That's me. Yeah. It's funny because some of the loudest people are actually introverts. I'm not an introvert though. Like I love to like be at a party and like be funny and whatever. Oh my God. Of course I shut down. Yeah. That's good because I was worried about that. No. Were you? Okay. Wow. Are you filming? Great. Okay. Go on. What's that? Um, who are you? Um, who are you? Um, who are you? Um, who are you? Um, who are you? Um, um, who are you? Um, um, um, um, who are you? Um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um envious of. Oh, am I, who aren't I envious of? All body activists. Honestly, I'm like, I wish, this is real. I wish I had the confidence, like, some of these girls on Instagram. But do you think they're actually confident or they're, like, constantly fighting themselves? I don't think it matters. They're getting checks with an ex to show they're like, we talked about this earlier. Like, I think you could be like a model. Thank you. But I just, I have a lot of respect and I am envious of really truly envious why did you do it because honestly i don't think i could do it i i actually don't that's like talk about demons i feel like it's like too much putting yourself out there about my body

but you go on stage full of hundreds of people yeah but i wear shapeware and i don't have like my ass hanging out but there are people who like literally have you know not great bodies by these standards like i could see you in a campaign for like oh my god please let's say go on what and a killer thank you I am at the end of the aisle great now what do you gluttonous about I've discovered this new frozen Greek yogurt from a company called YASO and they have a flavor this is by the way a recent thing and I'm a really bad dairy eater like it is the one food that I immediately like goes through you it's like boom like the weight just glues on so I have to I find that I can eat like fried stuff and not gain weight as quickly as if I'm eating like cheese and shit like that

But anyways, I've... So do you cut cheese or you don't care? I don't buy it like in the house, but I haven't buying this... If you don't buy it, it doesn't count. That's true. I have been buying this, um, this fucking Greek frozen yogurt and it's a coffee brownie flavor. And literally I was hung over on Sunday, which I haven't been all year. Like really hung over.

Did not leave the house. And I ate a pint of it by like squeezing the thing with my fist into my face. It was so fucking good. That's the perfect answer for that quote. Like that's what I envision when I ask someone about gluttoness. I know. I feel like, yeah. It's like I'm just like, don't judge all your questions.

No, I'm not. I'm answering from the heart. Okay, good. I just want that purity from you. What if I was like dick? Straight up. Straight the fuck up. Dick.

I got PTSD from that dick. Okay. Moving on. Ladies, when was the last time you experienced extreme wrath? Oh my God. So recently. That's hilarious. Extreme wrath.

It's funny because. I have to think because, yeah, go on. I feel like you have that anger where you'll be funny rude. But like when have you. you've been like rude rude like no bullshit like it wasn't funny no i get into fights you stand up for yourself you stand up for yourself when you're doing creative stuff i really stand up for myself i stand up in every capacity like in restaurants i will oh extreme wrath god i have to think of if you order a medium well done steak not like that um no if someone is like rude to me if like a if i'm in a store and i i

don't know i'm just always like what i bring it up i call it out yeah i wouldn't fight you i have extreme wrath on the subway i would say every single morning and that's real and it sounds like a joke answer it's a real answer because i get on the fucking train really early at 7 30 and people don't know how to stand on the train and i'm i'm the old jewish person and i am jewish before people think this is like weird because it's a weird time where i'll get on the train and i'll tap everyone out of the way i'm crazy i like literally get on the train foaming at the mouth crazy and i'm like can i go to the middle like i'm loud you know those those are the people who're like oh not this girl it's me like you own the place well no it's like either move to the fucking center

Or like, don't ride the train. I'm like, can I step over? Do you know, it's funny? I actually appreciate that person because I don't have the balls to say. I'm like, I wish someone would yell, everyone move in. And then someone goes, excuse me, you got to move in. And I'm like, thank you. No, but you know what I do?

I move in because it's actually the best place to stand. But really extreme wrath. Let me just say this about myself. I think I'm a very fair consumer. Okay. Meaning that if I am, if something like really bad happens, I will absolutely speak my piece. Again, my mother is from Tel Aviv. So like, she used to know the man.

My mother is the woman who calls the manager, except she has a great hair. Yeah, she has great hair. And eyebrows. She's got her look down, but yeah. So I'm not afraid of that. However, I'm also very fair when it comes to complimenting people. And in fact, just today, I needed a leased room. And I asked very casually a right-aid employee, just is there like a cafe, which I've never done, but I was late to this thing or whatever.

And I said, is it like a Starbucks or something where I can just use like a quick bathroom. And he goes, come with me, I'll let you use her bathroom. And he let me use the Rite employee bathroom, which, by the way, in my life, I was like, this is some Oprah shit. It was a, it was a private stall with a sink and side. He probably listens to your show or so you on the view. Honestly, something because he was really nice. And I called the second I left, I called the Rite Hotline and gave a very nice review about him.

I'm very fair about also thanking people who are kind. So yeah, extreme wrath is tough. I got pissed at United because someone spilled a whole coffee all over my boots and feet. And they offered me a paper towel and then like a $100 credit. And I was like, you ruined my literal favor. it was these boots but without the studs and yeah and I was like fuming on the phone I mean I get angry I love that but it's good you don't hold that stuff in oh it feels great it's like toxicness when was the last time you were a sloth literally Sunday did not leave my apartment it sounds like an amazing day

did you like it or you hard on yourself it was a bad day I was harder myself I was hard on myself I didn't feel good um I didn't even have the energy to watch my screeners like can you imagine my sag movie screeners I couldn't even take zero at first I couldn't do it I literally laid in my chaise eating Greek yogurt frozen Greek yogurt ice cream Yasso brand

and I did nothing I did not like it Are you normally a busy body No you know my show's done early So on cold days like I will go home And then like not leave the house sometimes And that does feel like shit I love that

See I like it but not always It's hard because you want people want to be an entrepreneur They want free time Then once you do You can let your demons get in you Oh it's awful Yeah And like my apartment's messy

right now which makes it like I want to just die like I come home and I'm like uh and then to get the energy up it's like I need Fantasia arms to just like lift all my tunics hang them up you know what I mean I just I need someone to help me and harder and harder my mom's like Hannah do it in steps like one day do this I'm like no it's a one day only thing yes it's a full commitment full day I got a block a day I have a rule like I try not to be alone for more than like seven hours during a day because that's when you question everything well that is not healthy Not healthy. Okay.

I've done it a couple of times. Got it. When was the last time you let your pride get in the way of something? I probably let it get in the way of a lot of things. I think work-wise, I like to put out a good product. Yeah. And it kills me sometimes when you're the face of something, but you have like no control over anything that goes into it. It can be very hard.

And I don't know if that answers this question. No, that's good. You don't know how the finished product will be. It's so beyond your control, but then weirdly you're the one who gets the shit. That is like probably the most difficult thing in this business. How's your ego? Like do you find that you try to let go of it or do you find it? No, I am.

I thrive off the pain, let's be honest. No, do I let go of it? Not really. I like, I tend to wonder like at serious if I have a bad interview, which really doesn't happen often. But when it does, it eats away at me a little bit. It takes time. You walked in today and you were like, eh, didn't have a good morning.

I had a weird morning today. But I think it's, I am tired. And I think sometimes, you know what, I like am funny. And I think sometimes people don't, like, no one really knows me. So it's, they don't know what is happening. When was the last time you lusted over someone? It's tough. I mean, okay.

Oh, and I know who it is. Oh, God, do I have to say this on camera? What if he watches? No one watches. They just listen. I will say that there was a restaurant employee. Say his fucking name. I won't.

You haven't said a single fucking name. Are you kidding me? British Dave. No, I don't want to say his name. Oh, my God. I showed you mine and you didn't show me yours. See, look, I let pride get in the way. That answers your last question.

And that was the answer. No, you know what? I had a crush on a bartender and then this is actually fucking hilarious. And I like, he works right close to my apartment and I like really thought he was hot and was like really thinking about him a lot. And I was like, but it was a place that I hadn't been to in years and all of a sudden was like going. Do you know what I mean? Where it's like a little obvious. And I felt like it was mutual.

You're like, the vodka soda here is incredible. I was like, yummy. What is this? And then the last time I went a roach crawled on the bar and I was like, can you come here and kill like he thought i was being florida i was like come over here and i was like no there's like a roach there's like wait do you want to die laughing and then i was like yeah there's like a roach and he like killed it real swift turn on by the way he killed that roach so fast i was like i'm adding this to my list like i was it like is he a murderer or is it like is he like so used to

just killing him no no no it was like tender and nice the way he did it i love it and me too the roach had like a little somberer on it was eating one of my it was in my guack anyways the point is he still put the check down see this is a good and this answers a lot of it's a lot of lot of your questions on this list. He put the full checkdown. I was with my friend Will and say I gave you a name. And, um, and I was like, fuming. Like I couldn't believe it. But it wasn't a date. No, but it doesn't matter. There was a roach on the fucking bar. You're not going to take a margarita off. Also, I'm just going to say this. Giving a lot of information. I see this because I have it too. I think you're shallow as fuck. Well, let me finish my story. I actually, um, okay,

I don't like love what you just said. Anyways, the point is, wow. All right. Are we on? No, so listen. So you put the check down And he didn't say like So I read old Jewish I like read to see like what did he remove He charged for everything including I hope you're watching We ordered a side of sour cream for a cassidia

Which came no wait which came fully frozen Like we couldn't even eat it It was a dollar So I put my United mileage plus card down And I pushed it to him And I went see this is And I went you know you could have not At least not charged for the sour cream

I sent it to him Is that your first fight It's unless And he went No I'm not charging you for any of it like it's on the house the whole bill but I'm like well what psychopath doesn't say when you put when you slap it down we got this or he was like toying with you I don't know what was happening I feel like he's an emotional terrorist I think he might

be crazy yeah I have not been back since but I will tell you that that fueled me for like a good week and a half truly so if you're not shallow then what about him made you like him he wasn't I mean shallow like he's a bartender like I don't understand what you mean by that like are you were you purely attracted to his looks no he was sweet he had like a very nice personality okay he actually was really nice okay and he was he's cute but he's not like i mean you wouldn't like stop on the street i mean it's not like but we don't like those kind of no i hate that anyways they're terrible he's nice i like you know sensitive folk yeah my theory with hot men is like they're treated differently also tall men like like they're worst like

they were never told not to do things because they're hot and then no one ever told him to like shut up or like stopping annoying or stopping weird so they're just different it wasn't great um and he also was shorter than me for the record just putting that it sounds like you dodged a bullet he had mask energy which i really liked and honestly yeah but i'll probably go back oh because then the other story is that i saw him on the street and i was like hey it was like after the roach thing and i was like hey and he didn't stop walking and he just went come by the like i'll buy you drinks come by the place like pointing at me and i was like okay this this is not going to happen so that was that also bartenders give me a fucking break like get a life mish call is what you

should be saying to me because that is as bad as a football player. I mean, it's just like, they exist to flirt and get tips. So what the fuck am I doing? I'm like very, you're right, I'm dumb. You know what? You're right. Thank you. Wow. I'm going to Venmo you for this therapy session, but you had it inside you the whole time. You knew. No, I actually do know that I'm done a shit. I do want to end with one final question. What do you do to cope with your health? You know, when dating is bad, when you're stressed out with your family, when your career is not going well, what's your advice to people when you're in your hell my advice honestly this is so cheesy and you're going to actually push it you're going to wheel me out i i am very blessed to have some friends who are as dark as i am

and as funny if not funnier than i am and like those people are who keep me honestly sane like having people to complain to invent it is free therapy makes you feel less crazy makes you feel less crazy and it just lightens you a little bit and it just takes some of the burden off so funny because we've been talking about dudes the whole time but it's funny a friend yeah can get you out of your depression where like a dude won't because a dude it is shallow relationships are a mirror oh yeah where a friend fun house mirror but a friend will like really be there yeah and like take time to understand you where a relationship there's too many moving pieces of like your you know what I'm trying to say I do know what you're trying to say

and a friend is like a solid beam yes an anchor yeah because the relationship you say the wrong thing you could go wrong he reminds you of your dad whatever where the friend is just there there there so I would say that helps me very much and honestly I really do watch a fuck ton of TV like I watch a lot of game shows I watch judge Judy I have seen every mesothelioma ad I know every daytime elderly crux is it good to kind of get you away from your own thoughts for a bit. Game shows for sure, but I have gotten it down to an art where I will DVR game shows and then blast through them. I can watch the prices right in seven minutes or less, actually four minutes. Like I fast forward at the top speed. We'll stop for like Plinko. I'll stop. I can name the

games I stop for. I mean, I know. I'll stop for any of the money games and the car games. And then the rest, all the Puerto Rico trip Trinidad and Tobago. I'm like, no, I don't care. London. I don't care i only want those two things and that's it is that like too revealing i like i love game shows michelle collins what is her instagram thank you professional podcasting host uh my instagram my lips are literally molting like what is it the air in here what is happening don't blame my hair look at this i'm disgusting i have chapsic for you i have korean lip mask can use chapsic korean stuff is really good it's so great um mish kohl mish k m i c-o-o-l Follow her.

She's hilarious and she's always interviewing celebrities and has our own projects all the time. It's true. I love you. Thank you for coming. And hell was actually pretty fun. Hey, thanks for having me. And I actually feel like we've accomplished almost nothing. We did.

I feel the same.