Berner Phone - Wisdom from Your Grandparents (With Caroline Baniewicz)

Episode Date: April 27, 2026

Caroline Baniewicz is back this week and helps Des respond to wisdom from your grandparents.   FOLLOW CAROLINE: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carolinebaniewicz TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@carolinebaniewicz YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@carolinebaniewicz Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carolineebaniewicz/   Leave us a voicemail: https://telbee.io/channel/msnxcnbe39nmb9rpvbi_eq/index.html   FOLLOW DES: Tickets: https://punchup.live/desbishop Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/desbishop Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/desbishop X: https://x.com/desbishop YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Desbishopcomedy TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@desbishop5   FOLLOW HANNAH: Tickets: https://hannahberner.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hannahberner/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@HannahBerner X: https://x.com/beingbernz TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@hannah_berner Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/officialhannahberner/   FOLLOW NICOLE: https://www.instagram.com/nicoleclyons/   Produced by Nicole Lyons Productions Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nicolelyonsproductions/ Website: www.nicolelyonsproductions.com

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This is where reality lives. This is where Hulu gets real. Stream now on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus, for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. Hi, it's Hannah Burner. And Des Bishop. Thanks for calling the burner phone. If you leave a message after the tone,

we may have to make it into a podcast. Well, hello, our little dialers, and welcome back to Burner Phone. And look who we have back. Only Caroline Banerowitz is back. I can't believe I'm back. I'm so thankful. I never checked with you.

Do I pronounce your last name correctly? You do pronounce it. it correctly. But I actually have gotten messages, we're Polish, and I've gotten messages from people in Poland being like, it's Banyavich, it's Banovich. So I'm not pronouncing it correct either. Oh, right. Yeah, but that's America, you know? Like, the same with Irish names. Like over here, they say Mahoney, but in Ireland, it's Mahoney, but it's over like, oh, Mahoney. So there's, like, loads of Moran. In Ireland, we say Moran. So that's just the way it is. You know, I heard that Rihanna's, like, she pronounced it, like, she's, we say Rihanna. We're all

like, Rihanna, the pop stuff. but she's like Rihanna or something. Like she's like, you guys weren't saying it right. Oh, yeah. Well, she didn't, yeah. She let that sit for too long. I know. It's locked in.

Beyonce comes out. She's like, it's actually be, it's actually by, beyond, you know what I mean? She like, Beyonce. Yeah, too late, too late. Set in stone. So, well, anyway, welcome back. Loads of great feedback. And so, but anyway, just before we start, I have to say that I had knee surgery two days ago.

So this has been, this has been hard to get. get together. But, you know, the dialers, they're really sick of hearing about my knee, but this could be, this could be the thing that stops us talking about it. So maybe, maybe just. Are you on drugs? No, actually, I, so yesterday I was, but today I've only taken an anti-inflammatory. I actually, listen, I've got, I'm not a big fan of talking about drugs. You know, I'm recovering addict, haven't taken drugs or alcohol since 1995. However, obviously they gave me some oxycodone and acetaminophic the menophen, which, you know, I took sparingly as needed. Now, by rights, I would probably still be on it, but I have chosen not to take it today because I was saying to Nicole off air that the thing

about it is, yes, very effective painkiller, but there's just this worrying thing where you take it and you get pain relief, but then for like 90 minutes, you just have this feeling of like, wow, everything's going to be okay. And I don't just mean about surgery. I mean about like, like everything, like, and all like my childhood trauma, it all just like melts away. And it's for 90 minutes. And even though I'm aware of it, I'm like mentally aware, I'm also aware of like, God, this is, is this how you're meant to feel normally? I know.

And you want to know something crazy? Is this what a life free of anxiety is? Do you ever have that feeling like when you, okay, like, because sometimes if like a Pilates class is really good, I kind of will get that feeling for a little bit. No, I do 100%. I get it from cold plunge. Yeah, and you want to know what? I don't go back to the Pilates class.

I don't go plunge. Oh, really? It's like, yeah, and it's crazy because you know that that feeling is available. And it's not on drugs or like people who meditate. Like there's nobody going to Pilates anonymous, you know? Yeah, true. You know, I never found myself going, I'm destroying my life with Pilates. Maybe the meditation.

No, but anyway, because I'm hyper, hyper, hyper, hyper aware of like taking these things. I have, you know, the first day, the surgery day, I took, you know, whatever. Like I just, but I, I didn't sleep at all because I was under a general anesthetic and I actually was up the entire night afterwards. Not in the hospital. It was a day procedure. But I was up all night. Turns out that's a side. I didn't realize that's a side effect of general anesthetic that you're just, yeah, I was just up all night. But because I had taken oxycodone, I was like very comfortable being up. That's the other thing that's frightening about when you take these strong painkillers, you're just like, oh, so like nothing matters, you know?

It's the great nothingness that is like, it's so frightening, honestly, as somebody with, you know, like that has a problem with addiction. Anyway, I took it, I took very sparingly yesterday and I slept the most I've slept in a long time last night for like over 10 hours, like a hand asleep, as we call it in this house. Yeah, I'm like 10 hours. Like, that's me every night. Like, I don't know what you're talking about. That is a rare, rare, rare thing for me.

Oh, wow. So today I'm not taking any. I just took an anti-inflammatory. Anyway, a very long thing. But hopefully, hopefully it works. For those that are wondering, for the medical people, I had a retinicular lengthening and a debrydment. You know, they just cleaned up a little bit of a,

I won't get into details, but just things that were flapping about and the breeze that shouldn't be that got a little tidied up. Flapping about. Literally. No, I don't like that. It was referred to as a, flap, to be honest with you.

No, I really don't like that. And then the good news, I think, from the surgery, for those that are still interested, for those that still haven't tuned out yet, a lot of scar tissue in there that hadn't showed up on the MRI, that when he released it, he was actually quite surprised how much mobility and my kneecap came just from that alone. So that was actually the most promising thing out of the experience. So we shall see. But anyway, I got it done.

University Miami, sports surgery. What is it? The Lanar Clinic. Very good experience, I have to say. This is not an ad. We are not affiliated with them in any way, but very positive experience, nice and smooth. And so here we are. You're in Miami?

You got that done in Miami? I got that done in Miami, yeah. Yeah, that's nice. So, and then one other thing, one other announcement, sorry for all the admin up top. But on the very day of my surgery, Nicole has to hear this again because I just told her before we got on air. Like literally just after my surgery when I'm like, you know, anesthesia and pain killers, suddenly I get an opportunity, a worthy opportunity, an opportunity that has worth to reshoot my special,

but it has to happen immediately. So for those that are in the New York area, I'm reshooting my special, the one I shot last year, we are not using that. I'm reshooting it at the Comedy Cellar Village Underground. on Sunday, May 3rd, 4 p.m. and 6 p.m. This is very last minute, and it's very kind of like unexpected. And not good timing, by the way, because I'm just like, insane timing. Supposed to, supposed to be recovered. Will you have like a cane?

You know what's funny? I don't think I'll need a cane, but I actually thought about using one. I think you should. I think that's cool. I thought about it. Yeah. Maybe it's a top hat. Big Desi Kane. Yeah. If you're old, you see, does, does, does, does big daddy cane mean anything to you? No, it means absolutely not. Was that a candy layer character? No, I have no idea who that is. He's one of the great rappers from the late 80s, like the initial, the initial hip-hop surge of yo MTV raps.

Oh, him. I've no idea. Yeah, big, da, ain't no, half step in. You made that up. You made that up. No, no, no, Big Daddy Kane. So Big Desi Kane, maybe I'll even change the name of the special. But anyway, you should.

that's happening. So come and check that. So this is all from skiing, no? Initially, yeah. I tore my ACL initially. And then what happened? You just did it? You kept walking on it?

No, no. I can't do this to the dialers. I can't. I know, I get it. I get it. This is how bad it is. Okay. So obviously Hannah, you know,

Hannah talks about our life on Giggly Squad. And so, like, there was a period of time where there was just like a lot of Des ACL talk, you know? and actually I think the most listened to Burnafone episode ever which by the way this is a theme now we're learning a theme okay because actually I fell 1,400 feet

down a mountain in Aspen tore my ACL Did you hit any kids on your way down? But Burnaphone was no no it was not a kid's area Hick Winifeltro on the way down Yeah yeah Funnily enough yeah I have been to that resort But anyway

The Burnifone was due the next day So the night I tore my ACL, Hannah and I still recorded Burnaphone. We got the episode up. But it's actually the most listened to ever episode of Burnaphone. The work ethic? The work ethic? Crazy. Yeah, but I don't want that to be a recurring theme.

But somehow it's become a theme again because now I'm recording my stupid special. And we're talking about having a cane. So anyway. No, I'm about to tear my ACL just to see if it helps with my career. Trust me. Nicole is a two-time ACL survivor. You do not want to tear. You're ACL. And women are more inclined to ACL tears.

So don't even wish that upon yourself. I won't. I won't. So was it the same ACL, Nicole? No, I did my right one in college and then my left one post college. I was playing casual adult soccer. It is very, very, very cool in athletics. To be like, yeah, I tore my ACL.

It's the worst. But I have a casual adult soccer. I'm sorry. A guy fell on me and I tore my ACL. So that's like not a good story. Can't play with a man. I can't play with a man. No, they're reckless.

Yeah. I always, honestly, like when you go to these knee places, I'm sorry, uh, dialers, but you really are getting a knee episode. I know, I'm sorry. It's my fault. It's my fault. It's my fault. When you go to any of them, Ireland, here in the States, like, because I've been to

numerous places, the amount of like 16 to 21 year old women that are like on crutches or in a brace or coming in, it's like they are the main, the soccer playing, basketball playing females are the main ACL tear group, unfortunately. So make sure to, there's nothing you can really do. There's certain things you can strengthen, but it's something to do with the anatomy of a woman that there's just more laxity there. So they're prone to tears. So anyway, what you're trying to say is women are weaker. Is what you're trying. No, no, I'm just trying to say they're more prone to ACL tests. Men are more prone to murdering. I, you know, I would be, I would prefer to be more prone to an ACL tear than

have enough testosterone that I would throw my life to the dogs because there's some, guy cut me off on the highway. Men are more prone to road rage, you know? Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, the dialers messaged in, this prompt suggestion came from a dialer, and it was things you learned from your grandparents. So it's kind of wholesome, but not always wholesome.

So we might as well just, let's just get into it, Nicole. Batteries in the refrigerator. Don't ask. me why. She doesn't even know, but I store my batteries in the fridge because growing up, I would open Nulna's refrigerator and there were batteries stored there. It's weird to me that people store their batteries in closets or drawers. To me, it just makes sense that they go in the fridge. I don't know why. The weird thing about it, though, is that my mom doesn't do it. None of her other kids do it. None of her other grandkids do it. Just me. It's just something I picked up from her.

And if I ask her about it, she doesn't know why she does it either. It just logically makes sense to her. And if it makes sense to her, it makes sense to me. I mean, she's 90 years old. She's doing something right. So I will forever keep my batteries in the fridge. And that's it. That's it. So I actually left this in because I vaguely remember in the 80s that people used to leave their batteries in the fridge. And I never, so I deliberately didn't fact check it, Nicole, because I wanted it to happen live, because I wanted the drama. I am actually curious if this is one of these things that actually makes a difference or not. So the takes are mixed on this. Oh, it takes. There's no science. There's no scientific. Well, it seems like overall putting them in the, in the fridge or the freezer

would cause more damage to the batteries. Interesting. I get that it's cold and dark. but it's also like kind of wet in there. Yeah. So, so there you go. Debunked. I do like that they do that though. There's something so charming about,

there's something so charming about like the misinformation. Do you know what I mean? I mean, I actually, I want to do a misinfoam. I want to do like a debunking episode. But the thing is that like, you know,

you can be overconfident with your like, I googled it and it's debunked. You know, because like sometimes Google, but in saying, that. I was curious. I wanted to learn this one live because I do remember that being a thing. By the way, another famous thing that I learned for years, I used to keep my coffee, you know, like coffee beans in the fridge. And it turns out that's not good. But, you know, you might

want to double check that too. Is it just because it's like in a cold, a dark, because I feel like dark cold place. I can hear that a lot. Like store in a dark cold place. Yeah, it depends on the thing though. So my understanding was that actually doesn't keep the beans fresher. What does it say there, Nicole? It's just, since we're talking about things you should and shouldn't put in the fridge. What is it saying there? So it says coffee is porous and absorbs moisture and odors from the fridge or freezer so that can affect the flavor and accelerate its staling. So instead you should store it in an airtight container and cool, dark, dry place like a pantry. There you go. See? So these are just things that, you know, there was a time I had this coffee guy who's like,

I always leave it in the fridge, keep some fresher for longer. Misinformation. I put bread in the fridge freezer, but I feel like that definitely does. Well, the freezer. The freezer 100% preserves bread. That's a fact. But Nicole, let's find out if the bread stays fresher for longer in the fridge. Should you refrigerate your bread? This is actually becoming a more practical episode than we thought.

Nicole's been put to work here today. What's the word? I also put my bread in the fridge, assuming that it would stay better. but it's saying it doesn't stay fresh in the fridge. In fact, it goes stale faster. What? That doesn't make sense. So you should keep it at room temperature in a bread box or a paper bag to maintain moisture and prevent mold.

Yeah. I feel like it does kind of like taste staler if it's in the fridge, but it doesn't get moldy. And I'll eat bread at any point as long as it's not moldy. I'll eat at any point. I think we need to do a full episode on what should and shouldn't be in. the fridge. I know. That would make sense.

I think, well, like, you know, butter, butter, you should have at least a certain amount of butter out all the time, you know, because like hard butter sucks. I totally agree. Right? Does butter eat the butter, though? Like your cat butter eat the butter? No, butter likes plants, though.

No, no, you have to have a tray. You have to have a butter tray. Agreed. This, a butter tray is like one of these, like, really good housewarming gifts. Because, like, in America, especially in Ireland, the butter tray is more popular. But in America, I, I feel like there's not enough butter respect because a lot of people also get them

like in the sort of tubs. You know, there's just like, honestly, the butter culture in America is weak to be honest with you. And don't you dare invite me over to dinner if you don't have a butter tray and you don't have room temperature butter. Don't you dare.

No, I have room temperature Kerrygold. It's going to be, it's going to be a tricolor outside of it with like a kneecap sticker on the fucking butter tray, which is like fucking Chuck E.R. La. Irish Freedom butter here. Nice and warm and smushy. Yeah, exactly.

I don't want to like, I don't need to, I don't want to have to like melt the, um, butter. When I'm at like a restaurant, you know, when you're at like an Italian restaurant and they hand you like a thing of bread and then they hand you the little, uh,

butter, a little packety thing. But they're cold. Yes. I then have to become a chemist and put the butter. I put the butter on the light to heat it up or like if there's a candle, all kind of do a smore situation, like it's a marshmallow. Like a heroin addict.

Yes. Yes. What now? You're getting the works together. Yeah. Just take the damn butter out of the fridge. Yeah. No.

Well, sometimes if it's in those plastic things, I'll smush. I smush them. Like I kind of warm it up with like a smush. Yeah. Squeeze. Like it's clay? Yeah. But like basically, you know, butter tray, that's my advice.

That's today's advice. Today's, by the way, this isn't the rule of life hack. yet. But since we've just about to mention a life hack, have a butter tray, life hack, like a couple of months ago, I jokingly said a life hack. And I said to Chris, I was like, yeah, that'd be funny. We should get like a sponsor for life hack. And then I jokingly, he was like Rula, because Rula is one of our sponsors, online therapy. And great, like, of all the sponsors, that's like really fits. Because this podcast began as a comedy, mental health podcast, burning in hell. So I'm a big fan of having an online therapy platform that works with us.

Anyway, I jokingly was like life hacks with Rula. But actually Rula found out about it. And they were such a fan of the idea that we are actually doing a monthly segment of life hacks with Rula that will be starting in two or three weeks. So if you actually have a life hack, don't be afraid to message in any time. And this just won't be like, it won't be a main prompt, but basically like your favorite life hack, everybody. We would be doing. that once a month, sponsored by Rula. Thanks for them for joining the creative journey here on Burnafone. But anyway, my life hack for the day, which is not a rule of life hack, is have a butter tray. And you're right, that is an amazing housewarming gift. Yes, because nobody, you know,

because I only know that because my cousin, Sheneid bought Hannah and I a housewarming gift for the house of West Hampton of a butter tray. And I was like, wow, this is, like, I could literally feel like three generations of my descendants from Ireland, like all nodding their heads in approval up above. You know? That's how I feel whenever I have a sausage. What? That's how I feel whenever I have like a sausage. Like I can feel my Polish answer.

Growing up Irish American, one of the biggest things was if your cousins brought over Irish sausage. Because Irish sausage is like very different to American sausage and it's great sausage. And it was like, oh, they brought over the Irish sausage. Now you can get it here now a lot easier than you used to be able to get. But I can't imagine the culture of the Polish sausage and the judgment of, you know, because like the Polish sausage is a serious business. It's serious. And then the applesauce, like they kind of really get freaky with it, like really freaky with it.

But that's the sweet and savory. Yeah, they just are like, what if we just went crazy? But I will say like I, like Polish pottery is so beautiful. And like when you think of a house where me, like another one is like, I don't even know what they're called. but like the pottery that you put a ladle on, like a spoonholder? What are those called? You guys know what I don't talk about?

You put them on a stove. No, yeah, I know the thing you're talking. I don't know what the actual thing is called. Another great gift, a little espresso cups great gift. Polish pottery, beautiful. By the way, life hack number two. Polish sausage on the grill during the summer, ultimate barbecue edition. That does sound great.

Are you kidding me? Can I say something? When am I barbecuing? I live in an apartment. When am I barbecue? I'm so excited to barbecue. I'm ready. But I don't, I don't.

I'm a barbecue on the barbecue? I'm not barbecue. Oh, I know, but you're Polish. I would save the house on fire. Yeah, I know. But when you were a child, you guys didn't. By the way, how are you not Catholic? Oh, well, my parents were Catholic.

They were very Catholic. And then they were like, let's remix. Yeah, because like the polls were like, in the 80s, the polls were like the premier Catholic. because the Pope was Polish. Yeah. Fighting against the Pope's American. Bring it back.

Bring it back. All right. Let's crack it on here, Nicole. We got a lot of these to get through. My grandmother taught me that if I color outside the lines, then the Kran police is going to come and get you. I just left this in because this is like my generation of upbringing. And I feel like we need to bring a little bit of this back.

But anyway, like, honestly, like, it's kind of. of it's kind of a lost art form just like if you're getting somebody's upbringing from like two generations ago you're just getting some of that old school well something that i didn't realize when i moved to new york um and i'm sure that you had this but like my parents like beat the shit out of me like they like spanked me they like they let me have it do we talk about this already i don't think we we haven't talked about it have we miss my favorite this is my favorite topic My dad used to get the belt out and go, yeah, the snap.

Do you know what I mean? I'm like, and people are like, oh my God. And first of all, I'm not doing that to my children. Like, I don't have children, but my cat, I guess. I'm not doing that to like my future children. So like, I'm not like, I'm not condoning it. No, you're not condoning it. But I am saying like, wait.

This is a safe space to have this conversation, by the way. Yeah, I was like, I was like, wait, your parents didn't like just slap you silly? Like, what are we talking about? I have a lot of jokes about it in the show because, so basically, if I find somebody like you who's like of a generation where you shouldn't have got hit and I, and I asked them like, did you get hit growing up? And they say, yes. I always say, well, just, you know, like when I got hit, it was normal.

But when you got hit, it was abuse. Yeah. You're from the generation where you shouldn't have got hit. However, the snapping of the belt and all that, it's like, it's funny. Because when you talk to the Gen Xers or like earlier, the kids that got hit, we have this like delineation of like the. the normal amount of corporal punishment, which we are almost nostalgic about. And by the way, this is not, and we're not, I'm not advocating for this paper. No, absolutely not.

But what I am saying is that there's a certain level of getting hit that you're just kind of weirdly nostalgic about, but then there was, there's obviously also the level, even back then that you knew was excessive. And, you know, I don't know how that. I kind of agree. I kind of agree. Like, I kind of remember being like, all right. Like, that was a little much.

Like, you guys were having a little. too much fun. You know what I mean? Like, you guys got carried away there. Yeah. So, well, so it's funny when you said, you're not going to, you say, I'm not going to hit the kids, which, of course, if when I have kids, I'm not going to hit them. But my joke and my show at the moment is I say, you know, I just think it's not fair because when a Gen Z has a kid, it's not even going to enter their head to hit their children because they, they've never been exposed to that behavior. Whereas when I have a kid, I'm going to have to stop myself hitting them and I'm not going to get any credit for that. And that's not fair. Totally not fair. And my other joke, my other joke on the

topic is it's not fair for gen X because we were the last generation that got hit, but the first generation that couldn't pass it on to the next generation. So we know how effective it is, but we can't use it. It's not fair. Yeah. But it's not true, by the way. I don't think it's effective to that. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, you're late. I don't think it's effective either. You're late. But listen, you're in a very, you're in a very distinct set of humanity, which is children raised in cult-esque environments. That is a unique. set. It's interesting though you don't like because part of me is like I feel like as a culture we're

becoming more segmented. Like I think this is going to happen to get like you know there's more pods. There's more like homeschooling pods. There's more like you know I feel like we're going to get more into segregated cultures. We're already in like all subcultures. But at the same time the internet is so big. So it's like all connecting. But then again, your for you page is so curated. Yes. So I don't know if we're more segmented or not. Well, I have a new bit in my show now about how I discovered, and this is actually true, the Amish only decided in like the 1920s to stop. Like, they made a decision, like as a group in the 1920s to like forego recent technology.

It wasn't like from when they came to America in the 1700s, right? So up until then, they were actually like advancing the same as everybody else. They were just another community, like a social. subset like the Amish that had you know like came over from austria and stuff in the in the 1700s and so i never knew that that they decided only in the 20s and then the menonites you know the menonites are like a subset and they have their own like amendments and because we're talking about cults and stuff here i used to think that they were crazy but actually seeing how much destruction social media has wrought upon society i was actually thinking

about creating my own cult that only does technology up until 1993. Because I feel like that's all the fun technology before the internet ruined everything. I do understand. I get that. I also like, I don't know. Like, it's just so much fun to have an iPad in your hands. Like, I really do get those iPad kids. Like, God, isn't it just so fun to swipe away? I know, but this is just the problem. You're not welcome in my cult. I know. I'm really sorry. I'm really sorry. Well, I want to be in the cold because I want to be like. We're called the, we're called the men in 90s, just so you know. That's really good. I like that. It's a, it's an actual punchline. It's not, it's not a genuine conversation.

Well, this is a great ad for, this is a great ad for your show. Well, this is my, I'm actually dumping all my new material. This is actually a brand new bit that I've been working on. I really like it. But anyway, hit me up on Instagram. If you want to join my cults with those social media, hit me up in the DMs. no I feel like if I was in a col I'm so desperate to be like you know I have phomo I want to be liked I want people to like me like I would have to stay in the colt and then get like a no pun intended burner phone to like swipe on a night like I would I would pretend I would live a double life I'd hand yeah that's the thing you live a double life like a lot of these people do you know yeah that's why all these all these societal controls they don't work or four legs good two legs better animal farm

There's always, you know, there's always unfairness, corruption. But let's not get too deep. Wait, Animal Farm, that's the Facebook game? I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. You know FarmVille? The Facebook game? I'm just kidding.

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every single day, all in one place, every tear, every triumph, every jaw-dropping twist. This is where reality lives. This is where Hulu gets real. Stream now on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Hi, Des and guest. Something that my grandma taught me when I first got my license was to always fill up your gas tank at half full. That way, you'll never run out of gas and you only actually have to pay half price. Girl math. I mean, I actually left this thing because it's kind of nostalgic because that was my mother's obsession.

Like, the anxiety kicked in the minute she went below 50%. That's really funny. You know? It's a good practice. I mean, it is a good practice. It's like, I know it's better to not let your car go like really low. It's actually bad for the car to go super low.

It is, yeah. But the halfway thing is, I mean, it's good practice, but like not as necessary as my mother. And this, there's, because I was actually recently, when I was playing New Mexico, the driver said, oh, I never,

I never go lower than halfway. And I was like, this is really a thing. I think really amongst women, because men, unfortunately, they have a stupid. stupid like desire to like live dangerously so men will be like on fumes thinking I can make it,

you know? But I think I think probably more common in women this desire not to be lower than half, which I think is good advice actually. Yeah, I think it's pretty good advice too. Also like, you know, if the gas prices are low, that's your time. Like you know what I mean? Like if it's like fill it up, get an extra can. I don't know. I've never owned a car. But like, like, no cars. No cars, no barbecues. Yeah, but I think like your grandpa's just looking out for you. You don't have to. But it's cute too.

It's cute too that you, hold on. I've never actually run out of gas, but I have definitely been dangerly close. But I was in a car. I was in a car where the guy ran out of gas, but we didn't actually know why originally. And a good Samaritan said, oh, I have a, I have a canister in my garage nearby. And like, he got the canister. And then we ran to a gas station. and got enough to get us going.

But like it's super embarrassing to like run out of, it's like the height of irresponsibility. Yeah. But, you know, honestly, what I like about this is it's a nice moment to just reflect on how nice it is to have a relationship with your grandparents. Yeah. It's not like the most important advice, but it's more important to just remember that the love. Grandparents' love is the best because it's absent of disenfranchise. discipline. It's absent of like this stuff that's annoying about parenting, you know? So you just get the love, you know? Yeah. It's also interesting like the things that they taught because those

are the things that they thought were really important, but also the things that you hold on to, like as a kid. Like, I'm sure like your grandma said a lot of other things, but it's like interesting the things that we like hold on to that we're like, that was the important thing that they said. You know what I mean? Well, I've said about. before on this pod, but one of my grandmother's big things was she would always say, never show up with one hand as long as the other. Like in other words, like when you go somewhere, you have to bring something. Something, yeah. But my grandmother was hired from Ireland, so she had colorful ways of saying them. But I don't remember them as much as like my aunt does,

for example, but that's one that always sticks out. Oh, and my other big memory, which actually, I feel like we don't play this game enough anymore. My grandmother always had high cue. Do you guys remember high cue by any chance? High Q is just this very basic game. It's like essentially like a fat cross, but not like a religious cross. And it's just all pegs into holes. And the idea was that you had to try to get one in the center at the end. And you got rid of one, you got rid of one by jumping one piece.

Yeah, I do remember this. IQ. Can I say something? Some of the games back in the day, like, I mean, we're like playing iPads now, right? We're playing like, but like pickup sticks? like, did I grow up in the 1800s? Like, I grew up playing pick up sticks. Like, that's crazy.

Like, it's crazy to be like, yeah, I grew up playing pickup sticks. Like, yeah. The men in the 90s play pickup sticks. They play pickup sticks for sure. I'm like, yeah, I grew up playing pickups. Like, what, how old am I? You know what I mean? It's crazy how games have changed.

Yeah. High Q is good. And so she could always 100% of the time leave one in the middle, but it took me years to get one in the middle. But actually, fun game for kids. I would actually recommend, I bet you high Q still exists unless it turns out that kids

were choking on the pieces or something. Probably. But listen, this is the part of the problem is we've lost so many great games, you know, because some kids swallowed a piece. But anyway,

I know. IQ is actually a good game to have around the house. Yeah. Yeah. If a kid gets into IQ, I think it's good for the brain. I agree.

I think, like, honestly, like a deck of cards. You can ever beat a deck of cards. It's a good card game. You can never be catchphrase. You guys play catchphrase? Well, I know the game show catchphrase. It's probably pretty similar.

It's like, you know, you're in a circle and you have teams and you're trying to guess what I, like, I can't say the word. It's like that classic like charades. You know, you can't say the word and you have to guess it. Yes. And then when the buzzer goes down, if your team's holding it, the other team gets a point. Oh, okay. But it's like, those games can't be beat. Like those are just good games.

Yes. And that's like family stuff, family vacation stuff. Yeah. That stuff, that is one of the things, not getting too much like Gen X boomery, but these are the things that parents have to make a real effort to maintain these days. Because it is very easy to just let everybody go off on their device. Yeah. And it's just like more, it's like a simple harmony. In other words, like nice and peace, peace and quiet, everyone's doing their thing.

But you have to make, see, back in the day, you didn't have to make as much of an effort because you literally needed something to do. Whereas now you don't need something to do. You have to make them do a thing that's healthy. That's actually like a parenting challenge, which is like unfair on a modern parent, is that there's no necessity for these family games other than it's better for everybody. Yeah. And the crazy part is they're probably playing games on their phones, like, while they're sitting next to you. You know what I mean?

You have to make sure that that's not the case. Because there's probably like, I'm sure that the psychologists all talk a lot about the importance of like games like that and like what it does to families and relationships and stuff. But I got to imagine that it can be harder to achieve these days. Yeah, I imagine it's really difficult because I also think like, I think not only because you have to get people off the phones, but like they're addicted to the phones. Like they want the dopamine hit of their phones. Yeah, they're literally like it's like a tantrum if they don't get the phone. And you to like learn how to play the game and like, but let me tell you something. And this is very mena-nighties of me. I've gotten addicted to playing

Monopoly. It started... And real Monopoly. Not online monopoly. Well, this is where I became an addict. I downloaded online Monopoly. I downloaded the app because I was having so much

fun playing Monopoly and no one would play with me. And I was playing, like, I was like texting my friends. Like, can you guys please download the Monopoly app to play with me? No, everyone's like, it's 11 a.m. We're at work. And so I started playing with like the AI bots. I started playing Monopoly.

And then I realized I was like 4 a.m. I was like, I have a problem. I had to delete it. Like, I, I'm fully addicted to playing Monopoly. Okay, well, I'm sure all the dialers are dying to know because, like, as a kid, I'd know, as a kid, I played Monopoly, but I never, honestly, I'd say max 8% of the time we actually finished a game of Monopoly. Oh my God. It's so fun. I don't even know what finishing is in Monopoly, to be honest with you. But like, what is, for somebody in adult life that's gotten a to Monopoly.

Like, what's the strategy? Like, what, what is the, the things that are essential to do early on? You have to get a set and get a hotel on it as quickly as you can. First three rounds around the board, you need to buy as much property as you can. Around the fourth time around the board, start making deals, get as many sets as you can, and then build, build, build. And, like, I think it's because, like, it's the one place. where like Monopoly is like the one place where it's like safe to be just like a

capital's pig. Yeah. A money hungry, evil capital's pig. And it's like and like I kind of like like like I kind of get like the it's kind of fun. But I would only do it in front of, you know, I don't want to. With plastic pieces. Yeah.

You're not trying to screw over people. Totally. I was trying to write a joke. I couldn't figure it out. But I was like, um, never play Monopoly with gay people because they'll buy the, the worst area. and by the time they're done, it'll be the most expensive area in the city.

Amazing. Amazing joke. Yeah, it needs more, though, you know? It's really good. They'll buy Baltic Avenue, and then, like, you know, 20 years later, everyone's like, oh, my God, how do you afford to live in Baltic? And they'll put, yeah, and they'll put the craziest clubs there, the most fabulous restaurants. Oh, yeah, you only have to buy a house, but it becomes a boutique hotel, the most expensive hotel.

Yeah. We're writing a bit here. And look at, there's a vintage store where everything's $1,000. Yeah. So they actually need to modernize monopolize. Like in Ireland, for example, like the cheapest areas, Cromlin and Kimmage, like just not the correct, like not the correct area anymore. Yeah, there's an Ireland monopoly. That's awesome.

What is boardwalk and part? What is it based on again? Is it Washington, D.C. or is Atlantic City? I feel like it's, no, because there's Atlantic Avenue. Yeah, I can't remember. Anyway, it doesn't matter. We've gotten deep into Monopoly. We have a lot of new episodes to have.

Like, what's your best Monopoly? Because, like, I just feel like nobody ever had the patience to, like, and then some people used to try to play this, like, accelerated game where you had more money at the beginning. It was like, and like, everyone decided, yeah. Don't mess up the profession. How long does a game, how long does an online game take would have bought? Like, you know, out. Oh, an hour and that, that's nothing.

I feel like Monopoly games were always like, oh, leave it. We'll play the rest tomorrow. I feel like my memory of Monopoly is leaving the board out and then somebody hitting the table and fucking up the game and you never finish. It becomes like a coffee table like a book because it's like, it's like an episode of Stranger Things where it's like I have to come back every night for the next week to finish it.

Yes, to finish it. And risk, risk was like that too, but risk was like real guy's game. Yeah, I was actually never allowed to play risk. Like my family would have risk games with my cousins and it was like no girls. Whoa. Because, you know, girls can't.

Yeah, because girls won't want to go to more. A military? They'll want to negotiate. Yeah. They're not violent enough. Why are we building up our armies? Let's just have a detent. Yeah.

What are we doing? We're spending billions of dollars at war. We could be using those for shoes. Yeah. So I wasn't a lot of play. All right. Let's go to really nostalgic episode, which I love. Let's take another, Nicole.

I can't even remember which ones are the real hot ones. My grandpa taught me many things. that man was just everything to me. But a silly thing he taught me was how to make the perfect bubble letter S. Like when you draw like the four lines on top and the four lines on bottom and then you connect them. People used to doodle that all the time like on their notebooks. But yeah, hopefully you know what I'm talking about. and he also taught me how to make a fist randomly he'd be like let me see you make a fist

that's good that's helpful sock somebody so he uh he did that for me but um yeah no he was just um the best and i miss him every day so thank you for this prompt oh that's nice she got some nostalgia out of it the s is like i was like how old's your grandpa like no i love that s man Like, when I read that, I was like, oh, this is going in just to remember the S. Yeah. I just feel like, did everybody do that S? Is that like the thing? But like, it's like after like ninth grade, I don't know if I've ever written one again.

Yeah, you just, that, that time passes in your life. I know. One day you wrote your last bubble S. Yeah, true. I love doodling. Yeah. At some point you wrote your last bubble S and you didn't realize it. You didn't know.

That was your last. S, man. But the fist, that's really cool. Like, I think that's funny. Like, you know, your grandpa teaching you to... He didn't have enough grandsons. Let me see you make a fist. No, because, like, some kids would put the thumb under, you know, there's, like, things you can't do with a fist.

Like, show me a finger. Oh, do you not put the thumb under? No, you're joking, right? Oh, no, I'm not doing. No, because you can break your thumb. See, that's why your grandfather never showed you how to hit. He was teaching you how to pray. No, he had dementia.

He didn't know my name. Ever, and my whole life my grandpa had dementia. But he lived like a pretty long time, but he had horrible dementia. He was always like, you, we've met. We've met. Yeah, it was bad. But now I know, now I know. Yeah, you can't have the thumb because, you know, it'll break your thumb.

Oh, good to know, good to know. Okay. So little little things that. Life lesson. You get a life lesson out of Burn. Life hack with Burn a phone. To break a thumb with you, whacking somebody in their face. I'm sure Ruler would be delighted to be.

be connected to that concept. Yeah. God, the S. Actually, my dad was quite good at drawing, but I was terrible at drawing. It's funny. He's supposed to be genetic, but I was terrible. But my dad was, my dad, my dad had one where, like, he showed me how to make a dog out of the letter F.

Oh, cool. Loads of cute. But, like, doodling. So my mother was a big doodler because, like, on the phone, you were stuck to the wall, right? You couldn't only go so far, so she would be, like, sitting down doodling. Whereas now, like, I feel like, doodling's not as much because you're, like, walking around. you're busy.

You know, you got a lot of freedom while you're on the phone. I'm investing in stocks. I'm emailing people back. Yeah, you're not doodling. I'm on Pinterest. I, like, made a whole flyer. Like, yeah, I'm doing a lot when I'm on the phone. When I was a kid, my doodle, which is so, it's so nerdy.

But, like, I used to make spaceships and have, like, spaceship wars, like, in a doodle, you know. Okay, so my boyfriend grew up in New York. And he's... Chris Barnes, by the way, great comedian, everybody. Great comedian, go on. Really funny. Great. videos that he makes. No, honestly, like lately, he's been particularly on point with a couple of ones.

They love the who-ville ones. The what? The what? He does like a Who-Ville one and like people love it. They're like he looks like he's like, it's kind of giving him like face dysmorphia. He's like, do I look like a Who? And I'm like, yeah, a smidge. Like a Who? Like a Who? Like a Who from Whoville. I don't know. You have to watch the videos. Oh, I got to watch the video. Yeah, no, the one that really got me was the baseball one, the beginning of the baseball season. But anyway, Chris Barnes, you guys should follow him. very, very funny videos and very, like, quick on the mark with certain sort of moments. So anyway, what were you saying? He grew up in New York. He grew up in New York.

And all of his, like, childhood art that he brought home from, like, school, it's all drawing 9-11. Every, like, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know. Every, like, four-year-old drawing, it's like, here's my family. And then behind it, there'll be, like, two buildings. and a plane. Really? Like every, like,

traumatic. So they should have taken him to a doctor, but I, you know, he's, he's okay. Yeah, well,

Hannah was young too when 9-11 happened. So like she, there's like, there's a certain sort of age cohort of kids that were just really at the wrong age to be so exposed to that. So there is, there is some,

some trauma associated. But it's also interesting, like how, like, I guess in a way they're, they were dealing with it, but they're doodles. Yeah.

Yeah, it's really, because it's like also like, I mean, not only did he not think anything. I mean, he was a child. That was what would he know differently. But like the teachers were like, yeah, I mean. Yeah, like the teachers were probably getting some healing from it too. Yeah, they were like, yeah, it's just like this is the world we're living in right now. This is difficult. Yeah, that's interesting.

I thought it was a movie. 9-11? Yeah, like I was so young. Like I get, I kind of remember it, but I thought like it was a movie. Like my parents were watching. a movie. Like, it was the most... Oh, yeah.

So you weren't processing it in like a traumatic way. I thought it was the most famous movie of all time. And people were just watching it. Everyone's watching this movie. Everyone fucking loves this movie. Yeah, I just like didn't quite understand. I had actually left New York the night before. And I, you know, it was so annoying.

Not that it matters, but I, uh, I was, I left from Newark that night in September 10th. And, uh, I was, I was big into journaling back in the day. And I had a journal entry. I can't find the book. I actually journaled on the plane that night. And I always wrote the date, September 10, 2001. I always write the date in general.

And because you left from Newark, I saw the skyline. And I remember commenting on the skyline. And I can't find that fucking book. Just not that it matters. It's irrelevant. I'm not like looking to try to connect myself to a historical moment. But like it was the last night of New York as we know it. It would have been nice to just have that little personal memory.

Just the obliviousness of having no idea how. random life can be. I would have liked to just have that little note. I think you'll find it. Someday, maybe, but I've just moved so many times. But yeah, so then I woke up for my jet lag. And I remember Tommy Nicholson comedian from Ireland was like, there was a message on my phone being like, oh, it does. I was just checking. Oh, there's something terrible has happened. And then that was it. Then I joined the rest of the world watching it all unravel. But anyway, let's not get to log down in the dark nostalgia of Chris's doodles. But what I would say is I'd love to know the stats.

Like if there's somebody out there who works and like not just child psychology, but human psychology or human behavior has doodling diminished as a sort of a way that we express ourselves, cope, pastime. I wonder has it. If you are a child psychologist. Can you comment? Yeah. Just let us know the doodling, its current usage.

And actually, let's get even deeper. What does doodling do for us? What can we deduce from a doodle? There's a lot. There's a lot to learn. I think there is a lot to learn. Let's take at least a couple more, Nicole. Let's go rapid fire.

Let's get a few out there. The dialers have a lot to say. As a guest, this prompt is making me so emo. I'm one of those lucky few who grew up literally living within a five-minute drive of all four of my grandparents. Wow. So if I have to narrow it down, I think my favorite thing that my grandma taught me was how to use a potato and vegetable peeler. Sounds really weird, but I don't know. That was like our thing was peeling vegetables and potatoes together.

And she gave me my own peeler when I turned like eight. And I'm 30 now. And I still use it. And I don't let my husband put it in. the dishwasher because it's, I'm scared of him ruining it. So. Oh. That's a nice memory.

And, and it was a real trigger for me because I, that really was like, well, yes, potatoes. You know, I didn't make any Polish jokes. Yeah, sorry. That's it. That's it. I'm good. I'm good. When you said your grandfather at dementia, I was like, you sure was dementia.

I wasn't just said it was Polish, but I didn't say it. I stopped myself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Can I say something? He was my Irish side, though. Of course he had to mention, yeah, brain damage.

So anyway, no, okay, all joking aside, yes, was potatoes and carrots. And it was a real memory of family time. My mother's thing was always put, open up the newspaper and peel on the newspaper. What was, I don't know. Was that the thing peeling on the newspaper? But I used to like, like the task. I used to be like, I used to like getting the job of, the peeler.

It's like sweet thinking about helping your grandma cook. Like it's just so sweet because it is what we would do. It was like how what do we what's our job? You know what I mean? Yes. Kids can peel though. That's the thing. Kids like it's a safe.

It's like a safe gig. Yeah. Like my grandma had a food. Processer. Yeah. Yeah. And like just putting that. I'm sure I think I broke it to be honest.

But yeah, that's so sweet. It's really sweet. Yeah. And I, uh, As kids, it was always the long peeler. These days, they have the one that's like, I guess, like upright, whereas we always had the peeler that was more like a knife.

The peeler that I have, it's like you hold it and you go, yeah, the one I had was like, yeah, but it was a handle, but it came straight out, whereas nowadays the peelers, they almost look like a women's leg shaver thing. Do you know what I mean? I think that that's the one I have. Yeah, I have a leg, like I have a leg shaver. Yeah, that was like a, that's like the modern iteration.

They probably realized that kids were doing the job and they needed to. No, I feel like the modern ones are better. But for me, I don't know, it was just, it was, it was more of like a hand going out that way as opposed to like a hand going down this way. Totally. Totally different technique. Yeah, the modern one, I think, is a more effective peeler. But my memory, you know, you could go really fast, like shoo, and anyway, it was really, honestly, I left this in for myself because I hadn't thought about peeling vegetables on the tape. with the newspaper. And I wonder, where are people peeling now? Because nobody has a newspaper.

Like, where are you going to get a daily news to open up and peel on top of? I know. I know. And there's something like, even if you're not reading it, how about the cartoons? I mean, come on. How about, how about, how about, how about, how about, how about so much of what we're losing in this life? Oh, those cartoons. And you know, you had to do the voices. The voice, it wasn't on TV they didn't have, you know, Chris and Bell wasn't voicing the cartoon. You had to do the voice. Yes. Well, in your, your weird house. Yeah. We used to just watch the cartoons. I guess you had a cartoon. Yeah, I guess cartoons did exist. I guess. I didn't have to do Snoopy. Yeah, I guess that. Or Hagar the horrible. Yeah. Cartooms did exist. You're right. Okay. Yeah. No, but can we pour one out? Can we pour one out for the newspaper, man? I know.

lost a lost aesthetic that, honestly, I miss from this life because I don't care what anybody says, you retained more information when you sat down with the paper. I agree. Yeah. But I think it's a, the trade-off, though, that people forget is, yes, you learned more from the paper, but I never read the LA Times, the Washington Post, Bloomberg, Wall Street Journal, Financial Times. Whereas, like, I have all those apps. I subscribe to all of them.

and I'm getting information from all those places. So for the fact that I don't absorb each article as much, I am getting a much broader sort of spectrum of information. I mean, I am clicking on the article and screenshotting it before the paywall thing pops up, so I'm only getting a little bit of the article. That's a good, life hack. That's another good life. If you click on the article and screenshot as fast as you can,

you can get the first two paragraphs. Oh, my God, that is actually genius. Yeah. That is genius. Yeah. Is there anything worse, though, than when you go, and you are subscribed, but for some reason you've been, like, logged out.

And then you're like, wait a fucking man. I don't, I didn't pay for this hassle. And, like, sometimes, like, you know you have the password, right? And, like, they're just like... Yeah, it's like, you changed it. Yeah, I didn't. I didn't. It's like, there's been a data breach.

There's been a data breach. You need to change your password. It's like, okay. And that's on me? I'm going to risk my entire financial existence because I'm just not in the mood to reset my password right now. By the way, I only have one pet. Like, I can't, I don't have that many password.

It's like, I only have one pet. Like, what was supposed to do? I had to, yeah, it was a dark day, man. Like as cybersecurity got better and better, like, I had to finally put Scruffy to rest, you know, like, Scruffy had lived. Scruffy had lived in my mind for decades after his death. Yeah. And eventually, so many data breaches, I had to say, you know what, Scruffy, I'm sorry, but it's, it's, it's,

I'm really going to have to let you go. Yeah, a dog's purpose is to be your password. Yeah, like, like, like, like, like Pauli at the end of Goodfellers, it's like, here, take this money, but I'm, I'm, I'm going to have to let you go. Well, I had to, I had to let him go. You can always bring Scruffy out of retirement after you go through a bunch of other passwords, I feel like, yeah. Yeah, I've, I've got a very complicated system now that I'm not going to, I'm not going to

say obviously, but. Okay, one, two, three, four, but it's a system. It's a system, it's a system that's easy. for me to remember, but nobody in a million years would think of it, even though I'm sure there's a hacker out there right now that's like, don't challenge me, Brad. Don't challenge me. Well, I'll get, like, people try to hack into

my Snapchat. I don't have that app anymore, but people will be like, I'm trying to do you think I have nudes saved in Snapchat? Please, hack in. Go. Get it. Like, someone's trying to hack into your Barnes & Noble account. Get in there. Please. What do you want? Shout out to, like, the 18 months where Snapchat was, like, the best

app ever before they fucking ruined it. Yeah. It was a moment in time where it was so much fun. It's a moment in time. Totally, totally. Like, you're going to get in there. You're going to be deeply disappointed. Yeah.

You know what's funny? It's like, now grandparent advice should change. So it's like for all teenage boys, the advice is basically like, yo, never send you dick, never send nudes. The internet's forever, bro. And if a hot girl, you know, because it happened to my friend's kid, you know, like, it's like, you got to tell these kids now when they're like young. It's like, listen, if a hot girl online,

is saying that she wants to send you nudes and get nudes from you, she's not a hot girl. She's a spammer in some faraway place. And when you send that nude, you're going to get told that you have to get your dad's credit card and pay this money. Or, you know, we're sending, you know, because that actually, like, my friend's kid, like, experienced that, like, blackmail thing.

So obviously, my friend had to, like, take his kid, get him off the phone, like, kill that account. But, like, these are the, this is the sad reality. It's like, your parents, your grandparents nowadays have to give you, much more like, here's a safe way to exist. Yeah. This is a safe way to exist online.

No, just don't send the nude. Yeah, I agree. I agree. I'm with you. I'm with you. Because they're just going to fucking AI, the face on the body anyway.

I know. I know. You don't even have to do it anymore. All right, let's take one more, Nicole, before we call it a day. Okay. So back in the early 2000s,

my Nana taught me and my two sisters, we were probably like, I don't know, really young at the time. She taught us how to shoot spitballs when we were at our favorite restaurant on vacation. And it's an ice cream parlor, and she taught us how to take the straw wrapper, chew it up, and spit it out of the straw. And my dad was so mad. But I've never forgot how to do that. And I'm probably going to pass that on to my kids and grandkids, and it'll be a family tradition. Love the pod.

A lost start. I hadn't thought about spitballs for 20 years. When I read that today, I was like, wow, spitballs. What a disgusting but hilariously fun thing to do. What a lost art. Spitballs always make me think of Toby McGuire's Spider-Man. Oh, yeah. What was that again?

In the Toby McGuire, like, Spider-Man, when they show his, like, spider-s senses in the first one, he, like, can see a spitball going, like, across the- It's here, yeah. And I just always remind, but what a, what a lost art. Well, I'm sure it's not. I'm sure the kids are still doing spitballs because it's like, it's like a phase that you go through. It is disgusting, but it was fun.

It is. Like, in fairness. You didn't it's kind of hard. Are they still doing paper planes? Do you think? Well, there was that Threads controversy recently about the paper airplane, but, um, I don't know what kids still do. Here's the thing is like, this is why you got to have kids.

Like, there's like a lot of stuff you think's gone, but it's like, no, You're just not a kid anymore. So, like, I don't know what the kids are still doing. But I also, like, there's so much safety shit. And I know this is, like, the most boomer thing to say. But, like, I just don't know. I don't know what kids are allowed to do that we were allowed to do back in the day. So I don't know.

I assume paper airplanes is still a thing, no. Yeah. Yeah. And, like, the older you get, the better, you know, your engineering skills of how you make the paper airplane improves. You know, and then you can get the one. Like, what about, like, model cars? Like my brother had so many model cars. Yeah, I don't know what the, you know, I don't like some of that stuff still exists, obviously.

And then some of it is just gone, you know? Yeah. So that'll be the in years to come, the parenting episodes will be like the shocking revelations of what still exists and what doesn't. Yeah. But from my friends' kids and different things, I can say that there's a lot of stuff that's different. That's for sure. Yeah. I've been working on like the stand-up bit that's like, you know, growing up, like my brother's toys and all the commercials for like young boys toys on television were like, a gun to annoy your annoying sister.

There was like a commercial where they were in the pool and the old sister's just minding her business. And then he comes in and like a shark fin and like the toy was like a shark. And it's like, here's how to get your annoying. And then all the girl toys were like a journal that was voice activated with a code where you could write in magic marker your feelings. because you just like privacy. Like all the girl toys growing up were like,

just a journal where you can just write about how depressed you are and like how miserable you are. You know what I mean? And it's like, it is like those things don't go away. Like boys,

boys want to like, you know, and girls are sad. And like, you know what I mean? Like those are just like, that's just like what kids are. And like, I do think that doesn't go away. I will say about this collar. I love hearing a nana.

She said grandma She said Nana I love Nana I didn't have it I had grandma and grandma But Nana's really sweet Yeah We called our

The only one that I had Like Nanny You know Nanny So she was ours And then Hannah's Current grandmother She's still alive Which is like

Nana still got it Nana Nana Like Just just fun fact Right before we go My cousin I have a first cousin in Australia

Yeah, Stephen. And he's been active on Ancestry.com. And I noticed recently on Ancestry.com that he put up a lot of pictures, like, including my great grandmother, who I never knew, but my own grandmother, who was alive in my lifetime, but I didn't know her because she was, like, in a home. And, but just, like, the pictures of my grandmother and just how long she hasn't been around and just thinking about, like, how involved I am with Hannah's grandparents. It's just such a...

Yeah. Because, okay, we have an age gap. but not as much as like the difference between my grandparents and her grandparents. Yeah. Like I had no grand my grandfathers were both dead before I had memory. One before I was born. One before I had a good relationship with my grandmother, but she died in 1998. And the other grandmother died in 1996.

But like it's just like how involved like Hannah has more grandparents than my nephew than my 17 year old nephew. That's insane. That's really crazy. I, well, I like, first of all, can we address that ancestry? dot com has an FYP. What do you mean that he's been active on Ancestry.com? Oh. Like, is there a timeline on Ancestry.com?

No, he added these, because, you know, we're connected. He's my first cousin. Like, you know, so, uh, or half brother. The genetics are so close. It's like LinkedIn? No, well, I could, no, you know what it is? He, he puts up stuff related to this person. And if this person is in my tree, then I get an update saying, this has been added.

Is this the same person that's connected? it to you and then I say yes. And then Ancestry gets more information to know like this stuff is very accurate. Okay. I didn't, I didn't realize that I'm not on Ancestry.com. Maybe I got to log in. No, you don't need to be. I didn't do it. My mother got my brother spit, actually. And now the government has all their DNA. Yeah, I was against it. But then once we had it, I actually was started to, I took charge of the account. And I've learned loads. Like, it's been really fascinating, honestly. Oh, that is interesting. That is very interesting. Anyway.

I also, I, yeah, like, I, this is, you know what, never mind. I have, like, a joke, but it's like, after all this, it's too, I was like saying, like, if people still have grandparents, like, alive. And you might need to cut this. And I'm joking. But if you still have grandparents alive, like, grow up. Like, it's crazy to still have. I feel bad after all this, like, heartfelt talking about our grandparents. I'm like, but I am like, you still have, you're a grown adult and you have grandparents.

That's crazy. Yeah. But the crazy thing is that I've gotten to an age. Not that I think people still have parents, but like because I was semi young. I wasn't that young when my parents died. But like, you know, most of my friends' parents are still alive. But like sometimes I play golf with guys and they're like in their late 60s.

And they'd be like, oh, I got to go down to Florida to look after my mom. And I'm like, what? What? Yeah. What? How can this be? What age were you when you lost your parents? You don't mind me asking.

I mean, the poor dialers. I know. They opened up with the knee and we're finishing with death, really? I know. I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry. It's a running gag that I love talking about death. But anyway, 2019, so whatever.

I was in my early 40s when my mother died and I was 2011, 36, 35. Oh, it's pretty young. 35 actually when my father died. So pretty young, you know? Well, like, for example, like my mother's sister's only a year younger than her and she's still going strong, which is great. But, you know what I mean? Like, there's even people, you know, in my family, my aunts and uncles that are still going strong. So, like, it just so happened.

We were a little unlucky with the early departure of the folks. But, I mean, when people still have grandparents, I'm like, like, I, first of all, Hannah's grandparents listen to this. So it's one of the great. You're living forever, and I love you guys so much. It's just kidding. It's one of the great blessings of our life that we have them. It's incredible.

Because they're so cool, you know, like, they're so. I follow her grandma. I love them. I'm just kidding. So anyway, but anyway, this is real life being discussed here on Burnphone. So let's call it a day. We've had a lot of chats. And I have to do an audition in a short while, which is a very rare thing that I do in this life. So I have to prepare. And, you know, just judging from how I look so far on this, I need to work on my lighting for this.

You're kind of tan. Yeah, but I need a little more definition of my cheekbones. But, you know, I don't want to get too much into my vanity, but I think I can raise the, I think I have a way to manipulate this ringlight to give me a little more definition in my face. I did have surgery two days ago, but I don't want them to know that. So I got it. Because there's, by the way, I'm not saying I'm a good looking guy. But what I am saying is that this is an audition for a look, right? Hey, so the vanity is. You can say you're a good looking guy.

No, but the vanity is in this situation, it's not just the performance. It's the look specifically because it's not for an acting gig. It's for a presenting thing. And it's like, it's a specific thing. So I got to work on the lighting. Okay, well, I hope you get it. I also have a quick tip for all of the dialers and for you, box light over ring light. It's life changing.

The box light is so much better. I don't even know what the box light is. It's like 40 bucks on Amazon and it's so much better. Okay. I'm just saying, just saying. Well, next week we're going to find out because I'm going to have a box light up in this. I can tell you that. It's going to be so.

bright. It's going to be so your eyes are going to be like. I know. And I'm not going to put makeup on, even though like obviously makeup would make all the difference, but I'm just not, I haven't got the makeup number one or the patience to do it. No, you're fine. You got your tan. That's nature's makeup. Yeah. Anyway, let's not get too much into how I look. So thanks everybody. We'll be back next week as usual. Of course I should have a prompt, but I don't. But pay attention to my Instagram. I'll post the prompt. And don't forget, if you have any life hacks, send them in. And thanks, Caroline. Do you want to remind everybody what your socials are? You guys, just come follow me at Caroline Banoitz. It's just my name, Caroline with a C,

and then B as a boy, A.N, I'll pop up. And you guys just come on over. It's like, I'm not even going to bother trying to get into the C's and the C's. And you're not going to do it either. You're not going to do it either. Honestly, go to Des, go to following. And then, yeah. Put in C-A-R. Put in Caroline. Yeah. Join, join me over here. We're having fun. Okay, thanks. And thank you, Nicole, for your heavy research today. We'll be back next week. Thanks, everybody.