Betrayal - Nobody Should Believe Me — S5 E1
Episode Date: April 3, 2025If you like our show, we know you'll love this season of Nobody Should Believe Me, produced and hosted by Andrea Dunlop. While we're hard at work bringing you more Betrayal episodes, we’re going... to throw it to Andrea Dunlop, who has a story unlike anything we've ever heard. You can listen to the rest of Nobody Should Believe Me season 5 on all podcast platforms. Andrea Dunlop’s first nonfiction book, The Mother Next Door, is available now. If you would like to reach out to the Betrayal Team, email us at betrayalpod@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram at @betrayalpod See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Something unexpected happened after Jeremy Scott confessed to killing Michelle Schofield in Bone Valley Season 1.
Every time I hear about my dad, it's, oh, he's a killer. He's just straight evil.
I was becoming the bridge between Jeremy Scott and the son he'd never known.
At the end of the day, I'm literally a son of a killer.
Listen to new episodes of Bone Valley Season 2 starting April 9th on the iHeart Radio app,
Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Before we begin, a quick warning that in this show, we discuss child abuse.
And this content may be difficult for some listeners.
If you or anyone you know is a victim or survivor of medical child abuse, please go to munchhousensupport.com
to connect with professionals who can help.
There is a family in Renton that I want to introduce you to. Mom, Sophie, went on an
inspiring trip to Zambia in her college year. She's since adopted two girls. One of them
has an incredibly rare disorder.
Doctors say it's a one in a million chance.
The audio you just heard is from a news story
that aired on King Five Television back in May of 2019.
This story wasn't on my radar,
but I had a lot going on back then.
I had just had a baby and had a new book coming out.
And this was around the time that Munchausen by Proxy was really entering my work life.
The month that this story aired, I'd done my very first interview about my own family
story for Vanity Fair.
And this was followed by an appearance on a local station about my third novel, We Came
Here to Forget.
This was all taking place amid the second investigation into my sister for Munchausen
by Proxy abuse of her children.
By the middle of that summer, the courts would return my sister's children to her.
And a few months after that, the prosecuting attorney would make the decision not to file
charges against my sister, Megan Carter, despite the horrifying and voluminous evidence against
her.
But back to Sophie.
In general, seeing stories about sick kids in the news is upsetting for a bunch of reasons.
So family, friends are banding together, they're trying to raise money, and this is something
that is, you know, no little ask.
We're talking about like $60,000 for a vehicle for them, so we just wanted to put their positive
energy out there.
Of course, there are the particular fears and questions that I bring to it, given my experience with my sister.
Is this mom telling the truth?
What if this child isn't a victim of a rare disease,
but a victim of the person purporting to care for them?
Even when there are no red flags for abuse, which is mostly the case,
these stories are
pretty dystopian because they illuminate a tragic failing of our country's health
care system.
The horrible reality that families, many of whom I'm sure would prefer to keep their
children's health private, are forced into a situation where they have to perform their
trauma publicly in the hopes that kind strangers might step in to relieve the skyrocketing
medical bills that could otherwise bankrupt their family.
So while I usually avoid these types of stories in my day to day life, once I did see this
news report, right away I noticed that Sophie was positioning herself as the only one who
saw what was happening with her child.
I started noticing just kind of weird things or times where her body would just feel really
different like it would either be super super
tight or like really limp doctors visits filled the first
few years.
I was live and right away they found pretty significant brain
damage and so she was diagnosed with CP.
At the end of 2015.
But Sophie quickly realized was experiencing something much This is like a sandwich. Om nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom nom Sophie admits she started to question her own instincts. There would be times where she was like literally totally paralyzed and I'd go to her doctors and be like, I know she's walking right now but like she was literally paralyzed all day yesterday.
And they'd be like, no that's not possible.
I'm like, but like she couldn't move, like I'm telling you.
And they're like, okay but she can now. And I'm like, right, I know.
But after seeking a second opinion and running through genetic testing she also has one
on the ATP 1A3 gene which is associated with a disorder called alternating
hemiplegia of childhood which is a extremely rare one in a million genetic
disorder. And she's right it affects one in one million children. It is progressive and has no cure.
Wow, Lord, you took me up to the fullest extent on what I told you I was willing to do.
This piece on the evening news ended up being the first chapter in what would become a major
national news story.
This is rare for Manchester by proxy cases, which usually garner little national coverage outside of the truly sensationalized stories like Gypsy Rose Blanchard and Maya Kowalski.
But there were many elements of this story that caught people's attention.
For one, there were the optics. Sophie, who is young, white, blonde, and conventionally pretty,
had adopted two children, sisters, from a faraway nation.
two children, sisters, from a faraway nation. I went to Zambia after my freshman year of college on a month-long mission trip.
And when I was there, I just encountered the plight of an orphan.
Adoption wasn't on my radar at all.
In the televised segment, there are images from Sophie's life with her two adorable
girls interspersed with footage from the interview and B-roll of Sophie's younger daughter,
who we're referring to as Zee, who is smiley and cheerfully dressed in the family's kitchen.
At one point, as the two play a game together, Sophie sitting beside her daughter's wheelchair,
the little girl says this.
Oh, I don't want to get up.
I'm so scared. little girl says this. It would be easy to miss this blip in the audio, but the little
girl is saying, I don't want to get a poke. I'm so scared. This moment is odd because
they're not in a medical setting and there's no medical equipment nearby. To most, this
might be a throwaway moment, but for me, it's a harbinger of how this seemingly inspiring story of a mother who'd moved heaven and earth to help two orphans
became this.
So this is detective or work with the rents and police department.
Today's date is March 17th, 2021.
It is approximately eight oh three hours.
And then can you just state your name for me?
Sophie Hartman.
In 2019, King five first met Sophie Hartman after she adopted two sisters from Zambia.
She told us one has a rare neurological disorder called alternating hemiplegia of
childhood or AHC. At the time,
Hartman set up a GoFundMe page to raise money for a wheelchair vehicle. Today,
she faces second degree assault charges against a child, her own daughter. This is not based off of one investigator.
It's not based off of a quick investigation.
This was months of investigation by police and several experts who weighed in.
Kent County prosecutors are accusing Hartman of subjecting her daughter to medically unnecessary
surgical procedures and restraints.
Records say the girl underwent more than 474 medical appointments
since 2016. When the Sophie Hartman case broke, it was
the typical litany of eye-popping numbers of doctors visits and procedures that her daughter
had to endure. But this season, we're diving into the complicated, many-layered story of
Sophie Hartman, a white evangelical woman from a small town in Michigan who traveled thousands of miles to Zambia and returned with two vulnerable little girls.
People believe their eyes.
That's something that is so central to this topic because we do believe the people that
we love when they're telling us something.
If we didn't, you could never make it through your day. I'm Andrea Dunlop, and this is Nobody Should Believe Me. on Apple Podcasts or on Patreon. You get all episodes early and ad free, along with extended cuts and deleted scenes from the season.
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Figuring out where to start with these cases
can be a challenge, and going in,
I always know that hearing from the person
at the center of it is probably unlikely.
However, in this instance,
we had a pretty compelling source document because
Sophie wrote a memoir. The strong ache in my stomach that felt like homesickness was for another
country, a land where children ran freely and dust filled every crevice, a place so different and
foreign yet one where heaven met earth more clearly than I had ever seen before.
That was an excerpt from Sophie Hartman's 2016 self-published memoir entitled Crowns
of Beauty.
The book offers her first-person account of her time in Zambia and her journey to adopt
her two daughters, Sophie's younger daughter, who we're referring to as C, and Sophie's
older daughter, who we're referring to as M. The cover is a moody professional photo
of Sophie carrying her youngest on her hip
and holding her older daughter by the hand.
Born in 1989, Sophie Hartman grew up in a small town
outside of Kalamazoo, Michigan.
From what I've been able to glean about her childhood,
she appears to have had a fairly normal,
upper-middle-class life.
I've spoken to some folks on background who know the family,
and they told me that they were well- and well respected in town. The whole family was also very active
in the church and according to Sophie's memoir, she began her devout relationship with God
at the age of 14 during a Christian summer camp.
Sophie was a talented athlete and played basketball and soccer growing up and, after graduation,
went on to college.
And then, according to her book, a summer mission trip prompted her to leave school
about two and a half years early, changing the course of her life.
Scenic Kufui screams of a divine artist's touch, one that faithfully brings forth beauty
each day.
Within moments of setting foot on the soil that day in 2008, draped behind the fierce beauty of Kufui's landscape,
I witnessed the torments of everyday life
by the people who called this compound home.
I saw malnourished children ply their way through sewage drains,
chewing on plastic bags, and my heart burned in my chest.
Filthy, unclothed babies crawling alone in the middle of the street caught me
completely off guard, their desperate, empty eyes gazing lifelessly back at mine. The dramatic
and contrasting reality that was present every day in Kifui devastated me, and I've never
been the same. But maybe I had been missing something. Maybe beauty could always be found in places long thought to be dark.
And maybe beauty could still surface in places of utter darkness.
That is, if someone was willing to fight for it.
Sophia appears to have been in and out of Zambia from roughly 2008 to 2015.
But the details of where she was and with whom are obscured in her memoir.
In fact, everything about her time there is obscured.
As she notes to the reader that she's changed the names of not only the people who appear
in the book, but even many of the towns that she lived in and traveled to.
I can certainly understand changing the names of people to protect their privacy, but the
lengths she goes to to hide the details of her life there are somewhat extraordinary given that this is a memoir.
Notably, in her acknowledgments, which appear in the opening pages of the book, she thanks
a large number of Americans by name.
But given that the memoir is focused on her time in another country, her words of thanks
to the folks in Zambia are strikingly different.
My big Zambian family, you have changed my life forever.
Thank you for not just being eager,
but ecstatic about this book.
And thank you for letting me tell those stories.
I'm so grateful we'll get to be together
in the age to come.
I look forward to amazing chocolates
and the biggest pillow fights forever.
You are beautiful to me.
And that is it. I've written acknowledgements of my own for five books now. And especially on the first one, you name just literally every person ever, like the barista who got your coffee while
you were writing in the morning, your third grade teacher, your dog walker. If these Zambian friends
were so ecstatic about the book,
why aren't we thinking any of them by name? The book is largely focused on her time abroad and were given scant details of Sophie's life before in Michigan. In fact, we mostly hear about how
much resistance she encountered for a decision to go to Zambia. A believer very near to me
aggressively questioned my decision. What do you know about
helping people in Africa? And how do you think you can handle all the poverty and the horrible
situations when you have never experienced that? You will not be safe. And all I'll be able to say
when you come home is, I told you so. And look, I can imagine that Sophie's parents were probably a bit dismayed at the idea of their daughter dropping out of college to move to Zambia.
However, an idealistic college kid heading out to save the world is so common, it's a cliche.
We all know the guy who goes on to be an accountant, but never shuts up about his time in the Peace Corps.
But Sophie's description of the town's reaction to her decision elevates
her to the status of martyr.
Images of leaving my upper-class education and culture and stepping into the dusty lives
of children deemed filth triggered thoughts of a scripture passage I had read time and
time again. Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who
are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly, defend the rights of the poor and needy. Proverbs
31, 8, 9.
In the beginning sections of the book, we also hear from Sophie's little sister, Sam,
who contributes journal entries describing the change she sees in her sister.
I saw Sophie walking through a towering doorway,
given away by her bright blonde hair and beaming smile.
She rolled two large suitcases behind her,
and she was wrapped in colorful Zambian fabric.
I clung to Sophie's right side the entire ride,
wide-eyed and in awe of my big sister
who looked like an African princess.
After her initial trip, Sophie returned less than a year later and at 19 started interning
for an orphan sponsorship ministry.
And that was where Sophie would find her true calling.
Something unexpected happened after Jeremy Scott confessed to killing Michelle Schofield in Bone Valley Season 1.
I just knew him as a kid.
Long silent voices from his past came forward.
And he was just staring at me.
And they had secrets of their own to share.
Gilbert King. I'm the son of Jeremy Lynn Scott.
I was no longer just telling the story.
I was part of it.
Every time I hear about my dad, it's, oh, he's a killer.
He's just straight evil.
I was becoming the bridge between a killer and the son he'd never known.
If the cops and everything would have done their job properly, my dad would have been
in jail.
I would have never existed.
I never expected to find myself in this place.
Now, I need to tell you how I got here.
At the end of the day, I'm literally a son of a killer.
Bone Valley, season two.
Jeremy.
Jeremy, I wanna tell you something.
Listen to new episodes of Bone Valley, season two,
starting April 9th on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
And to hear the entire new season ad-free with exclusive content starting April 9th,
subscribe to Lava for Good Plus on Apple Podcasts.
He has called me to Zambia.
I was there and then he told me he wants me to move there.
I'm still in college, but I'm leaving soon.
He's called me to be a mother in this nation.
He has called me to serve these children
and to be a voice for those who have no voice.
It's crazy.
Most of my friends and family
are trying to stop me from going, but I can't say no.
I love Jesus. I love no. I love Jesus.
I love him.
I love him.
Oh, I love him.
Reading this book was a disorienting experience.
Given the context, a young white evangelical
setting out to quote, save the people of Zambia,
I was expecting the writing to be a bit problematic, but it
was also settling in for what might at very least be an interesting fish out of
water story of someone leaving everything they've ever known. And I
didn't know anything about Zambia, so I was looking forward to hearing the
little details about day-to-day life. You notice so much when you're in a new
place. It's what makes traveling abroad so thrilling. Suddenly everything from
the food, to the fashion, to the local shopping habits and modes of transportation are new and fascinating.
I was also quite curious to know what a 20-year-old college kid even does when they land in Zambia.
And after reading the nearly 200 pages of this memoir, I learned none of that.
Reading this book was the beginning of an experience that I continue to have as I try to get a handle on Sophie's story.
It's like the closer I get to it, the more it pixelates.
It's like trying to see through layers of smoke only to discover more smoke.
Sophie's primary descriptor of Zambia is that it's, quote, dusty and basically just kind of hellish.
Walking through the streets of shanty Zambian compounds
does something to me.
These compounds are slums, squalid, densely populated areas
where poverty and disease are rampant.
Whether I return home with mud between my toes
because of the rains,
with dust in every crevice during the dry season,
or with soiled clothes because of a mixture of urine and diarrhea from all my little friends. Something unexplainable happens. My heart
is moved every time and something in the depths of me yearns for Jesus.
Because of the obfuscation of many of the exact locations, I can't say for sure whether
Sophie really encountered this much dust, but certainly
the whole country is not dusty.
Zambia is a developing country, but to reduce the nation to scenes of crushing poverty
and desperately maltreated children as Sophie does in this book is unfair and inaccurate.
Zambia is one of the most urbanized countries in sub-Saharan Africa.
In 2008, when Sophie first arrived there, Zambia would have still been reeling from
the global economic crisis, but they'd also undergone about a decade of economic growth
and export diversification.
Progress was being made in education, lowering maternal and child mortality rates, and tackling
the HIV AIDS epidemic.
But there isn't much nuance to Sophie's descriptions of Zambia.
The picture she paints is evocative
of those Sally Struthers commercials from the 90s.
For about 70 cents, you can buy a can of soda,
regular or diet.
In Ethiopia, for just 70 cents a day,
you can feed a child like Jamal nourishing meal.
Since 1938, Christian Children's Fund
has helped children of many faiths
and their communities with food, medical care, clothing, a chance to go to school
or whatever is needed most. Today so many children around the world still need
your help and through Christian Children's Fund you can reach out to one
of them by sharing well just a little of your pocket change. It takes so little for you
to become a special friend to a child in a developing country, but boy, the good it can do
is worth more than you can imagine. So while there certainly is poverty in Zambia,
much like in most places, Sophie's descriptions feel troubling. Now, it's hard to say on its face whether
the problem here is that Sophie just needs to take a few more creative writing workshops,
or if this is evidence of something deeper, but I just couldn't get over how the people
she was with and the place she was in just never came into focus.
Much more vivid than her descriptions of life in Zambia, were Sophie's internal experiences, mostly talking to God.
These were numerous and florid, occasionally veering into downright romantic passages like
this one.
Sophie's inner experiences
You will find that I have loved you, Lord.
I have loved you hard and with abandon.
My eyes are on you, locked in.
I'm gazing.
You will find me fully and wholly in love with you. I will drink this cup, this
double agony, this double grief, this searing pain, this deep anger, and this hatred of injustice
because of them. And I will love you wholly as I drink this cup, sowing in tears, sowing in tears.
In her memoir, and when she speaks to the media about her daughters, Sophie refers to
the two young girls she brought home from Zambia as orphans. And there's an important
cultural nuance here. In the United States, when we say orphan, we usually take this to
mean a child whose parents are dead. However, because of the differences in family structure, the
word orphan has a pretty different context in Zambia, according to Zambian journalist
Glory Mishengi. Children become orphaned when they lose their parents, but parents are not
seen as the only primary caregivers in a Zambian family, Zambians embrace the extended family
system. So the adults that we would refer to as aunts and uncles are also considered
parental figures and often referred to as mom and dad as well, especially in traditional
village settings. Similarly, cousins are referred to as sisters and brothers, etc. So when
someone loses their parents and can't live on their own, the other adults in the family
automatically take over custody of that quote orphan. In a few circumstances where families are
too poor or too abusive, the orphans will be taken to an orphanage where they will remain until they
are able to be reunited with family or in cases where that's not possible, come of age and go out
on their own. So while in the US we may think of an orphanage
as a place where abandoned children await adoption,
orphanages in Zambia can serve as more of what we think of
as a foster home for children.
Because of the vagueness and frankly the strangeness
of Sophie's writing, it's hard to get a grasp
on what she was doing day to day in Zambia
prior to meeting and adopting her older daughter, M.
Largely, it seems that she was in the business of saving souls.
There's a lot of talk about saving women and children and being a quote,
mother to them.
But the particulars aren't clear other than various mentions of proselytizing and
Bible study and occasional mentions of meetings with various healthcare
providers.
And Sophie doesn't appear to have any specialized training. However, as well demonstrated by the book, she sure does seem to
know a lot of scripture. There's a lot about Jesus in this book. I would say at least a third of the
text is Sophie in Rapture's conversation with him. Now, as for any of the earthly men she encounters
in her time in Zambia, Sophie has nothing good to report. One afternoon in late 2010, I was walking
home through the compound where I lived, dialoguing with Jesus about my day.
Drunken men directed profanities at me as I passed a tavern, but simultaneously
my eyes fixed on three little girls playing in the dirt just a few feet in
front of them.
Their soiled dresses barely covered their bottoms, making it obvious that they wore
no undergarments.
My heart burned and adrenaline shot through my veins as I recalled that three days earlier
a young child was severely raped in an alley nearby.
A fire rose within me as I recalled another very complex sexual assault case
in which three precious young girls confessed that they had agreed to give themselves to a man for a
gift, which turned out to be a single lollipop for the three of them to share. Now sadly,
sexual assault is both pervasive and universal.
And unfortunately, it has not been possible to corroborate or disprove any of the anecdotes
Sophie shares in her book.
The story she tells here could be true, but her descriptions of the people in Zambia,
particularly but not exclusively the men, often paints them as cruel and violent. The transition from my Southwest Michigan normal to my new Zambian compound normal was tough.
It was now normal to cry myself to sleep every night, to be fondled and grabbed by men throughout the day,
and to encounter severely abused women and children.
It was also normal to hear heinous sexual comments by drunken men.
It was normal to have bruises and sore limbs from being dragged into an alleyway, to be threatened
with stoning and being thrown in fire while fighting, to rescue children, and to be harassed
and followed by individuals with legions of unrestrained demons possessing them.
It was normal to hold babies who had been dumped in sewers, to feed children whose bellies
and bottoms were being eaten away by worms, and to listen to little girls replay the abusive
events of the night prior.
And while we don't get any sense of the daily details like meals or dress, the passages
about the suffering of the children she encounters are vivid and gruesome.
The book positions Sophie as both a martyr and a savior, helping various women and children
at great risk to herself.
And while Sophie talks a lot about Jesus, she also paints herself very much as a Christ-like
figure.
Her story culminates with the adoption of her two daughters, C and M, following a lengthy
battle with the Zambian government, who, according to her, fought her every step of the way.
Sophie was under 25 at the time, which made it against Zambian law for her to adopt children.
She was also less than 21 years older than M, her
eldest daughter, which went against a separate legal requirement. However, the adoptions
did eventually go through, with M in 2014 when she was 5 and with C, the baby, when
she was less than a year old in 2015.
One day, after I had completed my primary responsibilities, I was prompted by the Holy Spirit to visit
a crisis orphanage.
I had been there only once before, and since then I had repeatedly asked Jesus for another
opportunity to go.
I declared under my breath that because Jesus made it clear in the Bible that visiting the
orphan was true religion, I knew that more would happen during my time at the orphanage than would meet my eye.
I walked in and there she was.
As she wiggled beneath three blankets, I could start to make out her tiny frame.
It was obvious just by her face though that malnourishment had left her entire body skeletal.
Her body came to a rest as I drew her near.
I looked down gazing into her eyes.
I couldn't help but stare at such beauty. She pulls her little fist close to her face
and she rubs her tired eyes. I've never seen something so precious. My hand supports
her damp bottom. The smell of urine meets my nose as the most fragrant glory.
Something unexpected happened after Jeremy Scott confessed to killing Michelle Schofield
in Bone Valley Season 1.
I just knew him as a kid.
Long silent voices from his past came forward.
And he was just staring at me. And they had secrets of their own to share.
Gilbert King. I'm the son of Jeremy Lynn Scott. I was no longer just telling the story.
I was part of it. Every time I hear about my dad is, oh, he's
a killer. He's just straight evil. I was becoming the bridge between a killer and the son he'd
never known. If the cops and everything would have done their job properly, my dad would
have been in jail. I would have never existed. I never expected to find myself in this place.
Now I need to tell you how I got here. At the end of the day, I'm literally a son
of a killer. Bone Valley Season 2. Jeremy. Jeremy, I want to tell you something. Listen
to new episodes of Bone Valley Season 2 starting April 9th on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts. And to hear the entire new season ad free with exclusive
content starting April 9th, subscribe to Lava for Good Plus on Apple podcasts.
Every other case I've covered on this show has concerned parents and their biological
children. So I wanted to better understand the nuances of the adoptions in this case
and get some insight into the girls' experience.
To help us understand the process and complexities
of transracial adoption, we sat down with Chad Goehler-Sogener,
a Seattle-based writer, educator, and performer
who counsels families and organizations on this topic.
What do you think is the biggest kind of misconception
or set of misconceptions about transracial
adoption in particular when you're talking about like a white family adopting black children?
So I think one of the misconceptions is that the white parent knows more.
Think about that way.
We have this weird way about adoption, especially transracial adoptees,
is this narrative that the adoptee should be grateful.
Some home is better than no home.
How dare you not be grateful?
You know, in this man, you know,
remember the whole, what was it,
the Sally Struthers ads with the kids and the flies
and all that.
Even that mentality.
And the fact is, that's not right.
And the fact is that you have to put in more energy and time.
So one thing I did when I did my consulting
is that somebody's going to be uncomfortable.
It's just how life is.
And if the parent is not feeling comfortable,
you can assume that the child is uncomfortable.
For trans-racial adoptees, especially with adopting black kids,
is you have to prepare them to enter into the world
they're going to live in.
I have a two-year-old and a six-year-old,
and I really see my job as a parent
to prepare my kids for the world that they live in.
And this is hard enough as it is.
So I can only imagine what an uphill battle it would be
if you had such a difference in your lived experience
to what you know that your children's will be.
So it's really important to me to note
that neither Chad nor myself is against adoption,
transracial or otherwise.
Families come to be in all kinds of different
and often beautiful ways,
and families are always complicated. It's also true that there are some additional
layers of complexity when adoption comes into the picture. And as I know from
talking to friends who've adopted, including our season two family, the
Wayburns, it's just a lot to navigate. As Chad explained, there is always the risk
that children in these situations will come to be seen as commodities, and consideration for them and their birth parents isn't always
top of mind, sadly.
In the worst case scenario, adoption can be seen as a marketplace.
For example, prospective parents can flock to states that allow shorter windows of time
for birthing parents to change their mind.
And when you add international borders into the discussion,
children are also at an increased risk
of being fundamentally and profoundly disconnected
from their homeland.
I think one reason that people benefit
from international adoption, yeah, adoption,
is because it's harder for you to cut the kid away.
So there's no three days, you can't take him back, you know, it's less likely this kid's going to be
taken from you. Right, so this family, you know, it is a transracial adoption. It's a white mother
of two black daughters and it's also an international adoption that is a faith-based
adoption that took place in the context of this woman when she was quite young going to Zambia to do missionary
work and then eventually returning to the States with these two girls.
So can you help us kind of understand these different sort of complications that come
around with these things?
Well, so first of all, if somebody has been running with Jesus since the Carter administration. I would tell you that God will never tell an 18 year old
to go 6,000 miles to get a child.
Okay.
He might send, go down to the soup kitchen,
go mow the guy's lawn.
So I think the problem with international adoption
for a couple of reasons is you have no idea.
First of all, you don't know what you're gonna get.
I don't mean that, you know, you're going to a place
where you don't know low concurrency, you can't spell,
you can't find it on a map.
I can't imply, I'm not saying I'm, you know,
but I'm not going to Zambia to get a kid.
There's all these different things,
you know, nothing with history,
and you want to take a kid and remove them.
Just erase that part, which is very bold and brash. It just seems like, where's
that biblical? You know, the Bible talks about God helps the widows and orphans, he doesn't
talk about just removing them.
Missionary work itself is very fraught territory. It's mostly young white kids going to countries that have often been destabilized due to long
histories of colonialism and foreign conflict.
And as Chad pointed out, Sophie's traveling to Zambia to take two girls home was probably
not the most efficient or economical way to help out.
I mean, being the plane there is all the money that they were all the stuff that goes
into these.
It's like, why it goes back to why my other concern about trans racial international adoptions
is I just have this thing that kids should be able to put their feet on the soil.
So my thing is, you know, like, are you taking the kid back?
Like, when are they going back?
You know, because that's interesting,
oh, we can afford it.
Well, you afforded it the first time.
You went to Ethiopia to get the kid,
but now you can never afford to go back?
So I think, I mean, I don't want to seem
just totally disparaging about it,
but I think there's a lot of stuff there
that still doesn't make sense.
I think when you're looking at, you know, this whole concept
of, I don't want to use the word white nationalism the way we all think, but there is this white
savior complex. This is the troubling vein running through Sophie's book. It's the grandiosity of
thinking that Zambia is a problem and it's one that she's equipped to solve.
A fierce fire started to burn in me with the knowledge that I had been born to fight for
justice. The core of my God-given personality combined with the circumstances of my life
had given me a unique skill set that seemed particularly valuable in Zambia's darkest
compounds.
And the two kids that Sophie ends up adopting
are not the only kids that she tries to, quote,
save from Zambia.
She attempted to adopt twins before she successfully
adopted her older daughter, Em.
She also describes many other instances in her book
where she's saving kids in a different way.
I took a few steps in Aspina's direction.
She immediately retreated backward and began shouting, almost barking. In that moment,
I became certain that she was under a demonic influence, and I immediately felt a generous
boldness to share the gospel completely unhindered. I began to share the gospel from Genesis to
Revelation. Espina was now seated with intense anger across her face.
I calmly approached her and gently placed
my right hand on her head.
She pulled away, falling down in the dirt,
and immediately I could tell that the little girl inside her
was held captive by darkness.
I got down in the dirt beside her
and proclaimed freedom over her.
I could hear her calling out, Jesus, Jesus!
And then suddenly she would stop. I made no retreat
and simply continued to declare freedom in Jesus' name. Espina thrashed around on the ground for
quite a while, sometimes extending her hands up to the sky but kicking up a dust storm.
She screamed as if her entire body was chained and And I stood in agreement with Jesus as he ordered the demons to let go.
I don't want to be dismissive of anyone's beliefs,
but also, what?
Well, the religious piece of Sophie's perspective
feels pretty foreign to me as an agnostic,
and we're gonna bring in an expert
to help us unpack those parts of the story.
The positioning of Sophie as both a martyr and a savior feels extremely familiar to me,
as does the book's fixation on crisis and suffering.
So much is glossed over in the book, but the scenes like this one,
where Sophie is heroically saving children, feel downright cinematic.
So as we move away from Sophie's account of her origin story and
the adoptions go through for both C and M in 2015,
this brings us back into the real world, a world where Sophie is now a single mother of two.
And after leaving Zambia, she doesn't choose to head home to Michigan,
where her family and friends live, where her childhood church congregation is, or where her entire support system appears to reside.
She moves to Seattle, where I live.
This season on Nobody Should Believe Me.
If she wasn't guilty of these allegations, if she was not doing what this search warrant was alleging,
how horrific.
I mean, she seems like a saint.
She would start to talk about money
and how she doesn't have any money
and she needs fundraisers and all this stuff.
But her daughter is in one of the most expensive sports.
And I believe the church raised about around $30,000, something like that.
I'd gone through a very traumatic experience having her children taken away and we as Haven
Church got the opportunity to support her and hold her up with our prayers. But from my observations
she's like the healthiest kid I've ever seen in my life. We'd eat as much as we'd feed her, but given the fact that her digestive system is so messed up, my daughter has to regulate that.
I had a hard time imagining being a parent and making videos of those kinds of things for my kid.
Did you ever witness having what Sophie calls one of her episodes?
I did not.
She allegedly had this journal entry that talked about how she had an issue with lying.
Every time I go in like to the doctor,
she wouldn't be exhibiting those symptoms. I'm like, I know this sounds crazy,
but I'm not making stuff. This is not, this is not.
Yeah, well, you're the mom. Yeah.
Would it surprise you if I told you that AHC is not a terminal disease?
Yes, it would.
So I think that all of the signs and symptoms are here for like, it's obviously a concern that she's pushing this child towards death.
Nobody Should Believe Me is written, hosted, and executive produced by me, Andrea Dumm-Lock. Our senior producer is Mariah Gossett, story editing by Nicole Hill, research and fact
checking by Erin Njiajie, and our associate producer is Greta Stromquist.
Mixing and engineering by Robin Edgar.
Book passages were performed by Ilana
Michelle Rubin. Special thanks this week to Chad Goller-Sogener,
Glory Mishengi, Francisco Alvarado who originally covered this story for The
Daily Beast, and the many people who spoke to us on background. If you or
anyone you know is a victim or survivor of medical child abuse, please go to
munchausensupport.com to connect with professionals who can help. Something unexpected happened after Jeremy Scott confessed to killing Michelle Schofield
in Bone Valley Season 1.
Every time I hear about my dad, it's, oh, he's a killer.
He's just straight evil.
I was becoming the bridge between Jeremy Scott
and the son he'd never known.
At the end of the day, I'm literally a son of a killer.
Listen to new episodes of Bone Valley Season 2
starting April 9th on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts,
or wherever you get your podcasts.