BiggerPockets Real Estate Podcast - 433: You Get Your Standards, Not Your Goals: Ed Mylett on Success, Faith, and Building $100M+ Businesses

Episode Date: January 10, 2021

You may have heard a speech from Ed Mylett (AKA the greatest speaker of today) sometime before this episode, but maybe not like this. For those who don’t know, Ed Mylett is a renowned speaker, entrepreneur, real estate investor, author, and podcaster. He has started businesses worth millions and continues to teach entrepreneurs through his personal brand. What many people don’t know is how much Ed loves real estate. That’s right, you heard it first on BiggerPockets! It’s not the speaking, writing, and podcasting, it’s owning cash flowing properties. As a matter of fact, he just closed on one recently with his son and did an astonishing $100 million in real estate deals in 2020. Ed emphasizes the importance of faith, generosity, and most importantly, setting your life at a high standard. These seem to be the key thought processes that many other successful entrepreneurs have, and again proves Ed’s point on their importance. It’s not easy being in real estate, especially when the deals get big (we’re talking $25M+ deals). Ed cautions young investors to not bite off more than they can chew, or as he puts it “don’t take a loss where you can’t fight again”. In a world full of mega-leveraged investment opportunities, this might be the advice new investors need to feel confident going forward. This episode also dives into the importance of having a purpose, whether related to faith or not, and how you need to chase the life you want, set your standards high, and do the most impactful things to accomplish them. Links from the Show BiggerPockets Podcast BiggerPockets book store #Maxout Your Life Website Books Mentioned in this Show: #Maxout Your Life by Ed Mylett E-Myth by Michael Gerber Click here to check the full show notes: https://www.biggerpockets.com/show433 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the Bigger Pockets podcast show 433. I'm not saying that success won't change you. I'm saying it probably will and it probably will be for the better. You don't want to be the same dude in 10 years you are now. You want to be a different dude. And the more successful you become, the more likely you can become that dude. You're listening to Bigger Pockets Radio, simplifying real estate for investors large and small. If you're here looking to learn about real estate investing, without all the hype, you're in the right place.

Stay tuned and be sure to join the millions of others who have benefited from biggerpockets.com. Your home for real estate investing online. What's going on, everyone? It's Brendan Turner, host of the Bigger Pockets podcast here with my co-host, Mr. David Green. David, welcome to the show, man. Are you as pumped up as I am after just finishing that interview? We just got done recording with our guest today. And I'm like, I think I'm trembling a little bit.

Like, it was crazy. I don't even know how to put into words how that guy makes. you feel when you listen to the talk. I mean, the fact we get to bring this person to our audience has me pretty giddy with excitement. Yeah, so good. So our guest today is Ed Milet. You've probably heard them before. If not, be prepared for an amazing speaker. I mean, like, I have often heard that Ed Milet is the, like, this is very commonly said. He's the best speaker on the planet. I've heard that from numerous people. And I think you'll see today why exactly people say that. Just phenomenal storyteller, phenomenally successful guy. And it's interesting, David, I want to know, like,

You guys are going to hear this in a second, but he is very open about how successful he is, but he's very humble about that fact. And what I mean by that is like, like, this guy's worth like hundreds of millions of dollars. And he has a jet and he has mansions and all this stuff. But he doesn't like, like, that's not where he gets his like pride and his like his, what he brags about. What he brags about is like other people. And like it is this amazing guy who does real estate investing.

We get into real estate later in today's show. And we spent, I mean, like, before that we interviewed him, we asked him like, what do you do for real estate? And he's like, I mean, I bought $100 million of real estate last year. And he's like, well, no, that's not right, guys. Sorry, it was like 97 million. I think we're just like, oh, like you're. Yeah.

Anyway. What I noticed about Ed is I would say for the people who listen to our podcast, they probably have a little bit of an issue with you and I the same way that we would with Ed. So to the average listener, you and I seem very far ahead. Like so far ahead. how could I ever get there and they're going to struggle with feelings of inadequacy or, well, that's Brandon and David, right? Guys, I promise you, Ed is further ahead of Brandon and I times a hundred than you guys

would be of us. So he makes this point. So I first, I watched a video that Ed Mellat did at a GoBundance event. So me and David are part of this Gobundance tribe. And he was as a guest speaker there last year. And I was not able to attend because I had a little baby at home. But he gave the speech and I watched it later, at least parts of it later on a video they recorded, which by the way,

we are going to play a piece of that after the interview with Ed, because we only had an hour to sit down with Ed, but I want you to hear the story. I'm going to play it at the end of today's show. But another thing he said in that speech to go abundance is he said, you know what, you guys in this room, you're all millionaires. You're all doing really well right now. You're all crushing it.

You feel really good about yourself. But if you're feeling really good about yourself, and I'm paraphrasing here, but he said, if you're feeling really good about yourself, it's because you're not comparing yourself to the right person. He's like, you're looking around at your teams and saying, wow, I'm pretty good compared to my, you know, my assistant or to my, you know, that manager and that part of my business. He's like, you're not comparing yourself to me. And it almost

sounds like an arrogant thing if it wasn't backed up by just pure truth that this guy is like the most successful person I know, like by far. So with all that said, we got to get to today's show because you guys are going to be blown away. But before we get there, let's get to today's quick tip. Your quick tip is very simple today. Listen to the entire show, including the very end. Like after we say goodbye to Ed, I'm going to play guys that clip from that, from that event I saw him speak at because the story he tells about his son engulfing is phenomenal. And we didn't get to it in the show. So I'm going to play it there. Also, be warned. I don't if warning is the right word. We go into a direction on the show that we have never gone in,

really on the Bigger Pockets podcast before. And that is we spent a good, I don't know, 10 or 15 minutes diving into the world of faith and spirituality with Ed. He's a very spiritual guy. And so we go into that. So just know that that's coming. So if that's not something that, you know, floats your boat, that's fine. It's a phenomenal interview even outside of that. But yeah, we had a really, really deep conversation about that. And then later on, another deep conversation about having your pants off or something. You'll get to that later. David made one of his famous analogies that he'll never live down. So, yeah, off the cuff. I would say what I was getting out earlier is that Ed is so much further ahead than Brandon and I that we can understand what it's like for

the newbies that are looking up to us. But he doesn't make you feel like he's better. He could say, you're not comparing yourself to me, and there's zero arrogance in that statement. So we were digging into Ed, like, how is it you're this successful, but you don't look down on other people? And that brought faith in the conversation. We ran with that for a little wise. Yeah, really, just a cool show. Most investors spend more time chasing deals than reviewing their insurance. But a quick coverage check can be fast, easy, and one of these smartest ways to protect and even improve your property's cash flow. As the months get colder, frozen pipes, icy walkways, and seasonal wear and tear can increase the likelihood of claims.

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No, it's great to be here. And I've enjoyed our pre-conversation. So if it's anywhere near as good, live as it was before. It's going to be awesome. Well, good. Well, let's start by giving our audience and understanding of who you are. You know, like our audience, you know, are from the real estate investing space, which you obviously, we're going to talk about real estate today because you are involved in that as well. But you're also like, I mean, like, I'm not trying to like buttery up here. You're a big deal in a lot of different areas. Like, people know your name. Why is that? Like, what's your background? What do you do? Well, first, I'm a really average IQ, average ordinary dude. Grew up lower middle class. I'm really not anything.

It's weird to say aloud. I'm not anything special, but I'm really not. I did have some success early in my life building a financial services business. And then in that business, I started speaking a lot. And then people started saying, hey, you're pretty good speaker. And that ended up, going to different companies in speaking, which led to consulting. And then I met Tony Robbins when I was young. And so I started to learn in Wayne Dyer and Tony Robbins kind of mentored me when I was a young man. And so I learned a lot about peak performance in the mind and the brain. And I became fascinated with that. And then that led to, it's really interesting. life. Then it led to, I started living in nice neighborhoods. My neighbors were athletes,

entertainers, and well-known people. Then they wanted to be coached. Then that led into other businesses. So I'm an investor. So I've had a really rich, blessed life of everything from financial services to Rob Deirdick and I are involved in a company called Outstanding Foods where we make vegan pork rides and, you know, real estate investing and speaking and coaching. And so it's been a very rich life. I enjoy most every single day because it's so diverse. So they might know me from one of those areas, you know, I'm sure probably. Yeah. Yeah.

That's awesome. And you know, you were a speaker at the, you know, David and I are part of this organization called Go Abundance and you were a speaker there. I think it was last year. And like I wasn't at that event because I had a little baby at the time, you know, like it just been born. But everyone just kept talking about how I missed out on being there. Like I should have been there.

It was phenomenal. So I did catch a clip that they recorded. And we can, we can go through the story later maybe, but it was a story about you and your son golfing. and him struggling with the golfing. Ellis. That was fantastic. Let's hit that later.

I really want to get it. I would love to hear that story again because it was fantastic. But let's go back. When you say I'm just curious, financial services, what did that mean? What was that in the beginning? I built a team of people that sold life insurance and investments. Okay. And we sold that company.

Well, that company was sold, I should say, more correctly, to a company called Agonne and Trans America many, many years ago, a really big firm. I'm still involved with that organization. But what that did is it was sales, right? it was recruiting. I had to learn to communicate, transfer energy, you know, influence people, persuade people. And those skills have served me in negotiating real estate deals. Those skills have served me in public speaking. They've served me in, you know, strategic planning and different businesses. And so that was really a blessing for me. I have no background in finance, no background

in sales. I come from a family too that's like very anti-pushy, very no, there's no priority in my family whatsoever of financial success. meaning it was never discussed. There was no dream. We never went on a vacation. I didn't want on a vacation as a kid. So I don't come from like wanting to be rich or any of those things. And even to this day in my own family,

I think they're proud of whatever success I've had. But they're more like, are you a good man? Are you a good father? Are you a good dad? They could care less that right now I'm, if I turn the camera around, which I really can't do,

but like I'm at a, you know, this is a $25 million home. Yeah. And if my mom walked in, this is a third home, right? And if my mom and dad walked in here right now, my dad can't because he just passed away, but my mom walked in here, she would say, how do you afford the electricity in here? You know, like, what's the air conditioning cost you? You know, like, that's just where I'm from.

And so it keeps you some degree of humility, I think. Yeah, my parents still tell me every time they get together, my dad will still say, you know, you could have been a lawyer, son. And I'm like, I live in Maui, dad. I got the ocean right. I'm like, come on, man. Oh, no, yeah. Isn't it interesting?

I can tell you something funny. I had my first really big jet. I bought a big jet. It was hangered, no exaggeration, about a mile from my mom and dad's house, one mile. They never saw it. Really? They've never flown on it. I go to Hawaii every year, bro.

I invite my parents for 25 straight years. My dad's like, why would I get on an airplane and fly to Hawaii when I could just hang out with you in the living room and shoot out? I'm like, because it's freaking Hawaii, dad. He's like, I love you. Just come over the living room and watch some golf. That's my family. Like, I cannot even express to you how simple.

And it's a good lesson here. And one of the lessons is I always thought, eventually they're just going to be blown away by me. Yeah. You know, and if that can't be the reason, you should do things to want to make your family proud of you. But if you're really doing things to get this wow out of people that you love

and care about, you may be disappointed. There's got to be a deeper reason for you wanting to be successful than to impress people because they're not impressed most of the time. No. They're just not. It's going to be very, I want to do that. I want people to be impressed with me when I was young.

It's a very shallow arrival when you get there and you realize they're really not that impressed. And a lot of them are really jealous. I was going to say, they're more irritated. I feel like, it's irritation. Yeah, they're like, like, there's just like rich people are obviously bad people. Right. And like there's this vibe that goes there.

It reminds you have a high school where like the popular kids were obviously bad kids. That's why they're popular because they did bad thing. Like we have this like this anger towards them. It's kind of like the way people are angry towards vegans. Like I was called the way. a vegan effect. Like, if you're like vegans, everyone's like, oh, like, people, like, I like, I, I, I don't say I'm vegan, but like I'm close, right? I could tell how healthy you are. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. People make fun of me for it because it's like that vegan effect. Nobody likes to be like,

when you see somebody else doing really well with any area of their life, everybody else then wants to judge them for that because it reflects badly on themselves. Okay, let me tell you how crazy that is. I've never talked about this on a podcast, but I've become pretty wealthy, right? Yeah. But I was raised with that mindset. Like they must have got it through some ill gotten means, right? There's got to be a story there. And here's the truth. I'm 50 years old in April. And mainly if I'm on a golf course where I live is a very,

people were very wealthy, right? And even to this day, and I'm one of them, they kind of go through a little bit of a bigger barrier than someone who's not rich to prove to me they're a good person. If that makes any sense. Still to this day, how's this guy got, he's got $400 million. You got a higher hurdle to prove to me you're a good human than if you didn't have any money.

And that's just my upbringing. It's so strange. It's really, really true. Well, I think it's important to acknowledge that that's how humans are because there's a lot of people that would like to be wealthy but won't take action to be wealthy because in their own mind, they're thinking only bad people become wealthy. And you've talked a lot. I've heard a lot of your content that talks about your financial thermostat. You're never going to exceed what you think you're worth. And when this stuff sits in the back of your head and you have this belief that wealth is bad, you had to use people to get it. I would say that's kind of a

common theme in our country right now, this idea that rich people got it on the backs of others and they had to step on other people, whereas, you know, from the group we're in Gobundance and from other people that we've met, I'm sure, from you, you're rubbing elbows with people that are very successful. They're often the most generous human beings you'll ever find that help people, they help people that won't even help themselves a lot of the time, right? But that's not what it looks like on the other side of the curtain. So I would love it if you'd share with our audience a little bit of your philosophy on the ways we hold ourselves back from achieving our goals, which obviously one of them is going to be well.

Yeah. Well, boy, really good point, by the way, what you just said there. And it's something that, like, I'm in personal development, right? So why am I even in this space? Just so it gives people some hopes because I really needed it to be a baseline functioning person. Like I had low self-esteem, really low, lots of reasons. Alcoholic dad. I was small, whatever, right?

but I had to get into these tools and tactics and techniques to just get baseline. But once I started to grow, I went, whoa, this is the key to going to all these other levels. And so I'm a huge identity person. I just really believe you get out of your life what you believe you're worth long term. There's short term windows where you can kind of violate that principle. And so I do talk about this thermostat in your life. It's your identity. It sets the thermostat of what you believe you're worth.

and it's like right now it's the desert, it's relatively cool outside. It's probably 45, 50 degrees today. It's 72 in here. So the external conditions do not impact this room because there's a thermostat on the wall that sets it at 72. In the summertime, it's 120 out here. It's 120 outside. It's 72 in here. That thermostat sets the setting. It's not the external conditions. This is also true in our life. If you're a 72 degree or financially, I can give you the worst possible financial conditions in COVID. you'll find a way most of the time to get back to 72 degrees. But I could also give you the best opportunity, the best deals, the best access, the best thing in the world that's 150 degree opportunity, you'll find a way to get 72 degrees out of it.

And so if you don't change, by the way, that's in your happiness, your fitness, your wellness, your wealth, your relationships, your faith, I'm a psychopath about my thermostat setting. And there's lots of techniques and strategies. There's the thing everyone always says, all right, who are the five people you hang around? It's the most oversaid thing and self-help personal development in the world. But truly, look at them. And if I asked you, seriously, can you name three things about them that you must have that they have in your life that you don't? And most people go, no, not really.

But could you name three or four things about them you don't want? Yes. So they're the wrong people around you. But there's other techniques, not just association, but short-term bursts. If you do short-term crazy bursts of activity, you can trick your identity into believing that you're at the that level permanently. So most very successful people, I know, people say, well, they're very consistent. True. But you know what? Most of them have this very bizarre short window bursts in their life that they can go, even at your guys' case, unpack your entire life. You're both extremely

successful. You're very consistent, but I'll bet you there are two or three 90-day windows in your entire life that just unbelievable things happened in. Maybe the ramifications didn't land until later, but a 90-day window, two or three deals you did, two or three people you met in short-burst windows of time changed your identity. Moments can change your identity. A podcast can change your identity. So I'm a not about that one principle of winning. And then the second thing is not to go, I'm being long-winded here. The older I get, I know I get my standards, not my goals. You get ultimately what your standards are long-term. So I'm constantly evaluating my standard of how I conduct myself, how I think, who I'm around.

You know, today I was seven minutes late for our show. That is a complete violation of who I am. I'm always early. That's the first thing I did, right? Even though I'm the guest, I said, I'm so sorry. It's unacceptable standard for me. And that will bother me just so you know for a very long time. Because it's not about you guys.

It's about me. That's not my standard to be late. So I'm a nut about standards. And I don't think enough people evaluate that part. They're just writing stuff down on paper they say they want. instead of getting in touch with their standards. Tom Brady has higher standards than the average NFL quarterback. Yeah.

Period. Right. Yep. You meet a business person. Their standards are different. You ever meet a world-class mother? It's not her goals. Yeah.

It's her standards is what she expects as herself from a mother with those children are just different, right? It's our standards every time. That's so good. That's so good. It reminds you something we've been talking about lately on the show. We've mentioned it a few times now. It's like I think some people have the standard that says it's okay to

lie to themselves. Now everyone listening goes, no, I don't say that. But when you set an alarm in the morning at 6 o'clock and you hit the snooze button seven times, it's like telling yourself, you're okay setting a bar and then missing that bar. And so that and you do that and everything. I was going to do the gym today. I just wasn't feeling really good. Every time you do that, you're just lowering that standard, which then applies to every area of your life, whether it's real standard or self-confidence. Yeah. The key thing in being self-confidence is that you keep the promises you make to yourself. Yes. Period. Yes. And when you, when I meet someone who's not self-confident,

I just know they've had a habit of breaking promises they've told themselves. So what I do is I try to set the game up to. I try to make ones I'm going to keep. And that's why that being late thing today, I know I'm blaboring the point, you have no idea what a violation that is to me of even seven minutes,

seven seconds. And I'm pretty cognizant of keeping the problem. I'm a confident person, I would say, at this point. And I must tell you, that's because I've kept promises I've made to myself for the most part. quite honestly, not to be very deep, but if you're a person of faith, even if you're not,

but if you understand faith, why do we have such faith if you're, let's say, a Christian? Because we believe there's a promise Jesus made to us that if we accept him as our Savior, we abide by these commandments, we get to go to heaven. There's kind of like an internal contract. You're like, we believe the promise you've made. And to the extent that you believe that is to the extent that your faith is deep, that your confidence in your faith. So take anything in your life, it's to the extent that you believe.

the promise will be kept that is linked to your confidence in every single area of your life. And so you better have one of those relationships with yourself or you're going to have a very difficult existence on this earth. I would say to further that point, a big reason why you see a lot of people that are successful have a measure of faith, whether it's Christianity or something else, is like when you believe the promise that you just said, you now have inherent value in yourself because you're valuable to an important person, which by proxy raises your financial thermostat. It is not okay that I live this low standard because now I'm a somebody. I've been adopted into this family, right?

My father's a king. There's some measure of importance that's bestowed on you, which raises the thermostat, right? Very good. And I noticed that's the component of faith that changes people's lives when they're like, I feel different. You could really break that down into saying they had their thermostat raised. Now they're operating at a higher level, which meant their standard got pulled up and boom, their life looks different.

But to the people who don't understand it, it's just I don't. get it. They found something, right? You can sort of reverse engineer and understand this is what's going on. And what I love about what you're saying at is you're sharing these principles that anybody could follow. It doesn't have to be a mystery, how to be successful, how to be healthy, how to hit your goals. There is a path to take. And for those that want to walk it, they can. And that's one of the reasons we want to get you on the show because I listen to a lot of your stuff. Another thing I notice about you is you're not afraid to say that you're successful and wealthy because there's not an arrogance in it. There's not a, I am better than you because I'm successful and wealthy. You're just

stating a fact. And what I know about you and the fact that your reputation is that you are a very generous man. Thank you. You've sort of given yourself permission to be successful because it's going to flow into you and then into others. So you're not afraid like, man, if I get this awesome car, I'm going to think I'm that I'm something else. I'm going to think I'm better than other people. And when you have that component in your life, which I think I'm still struggling with to a degree, you're afraid of success because you know it's going to change you or you know it's going to show other people the character flies you have. But when your goal is to help other people serve other people, you're perfectly fine with great stuff flowing through you because it's going to flow right

back out of you. Is that it, is that basically accurate with what you found is that your life has progressed? Yeah, I'm going to answer you on that. Being a really vulnerable, transparent. When I was younger, I struggled with that. I think it did. I started to, there have been different times in my life where I'm like, I'm pretty. I'm good, you know, when I was younger. And inevitably, life, God, however you want to look at it, sort of slapped me back into place and gave me some humility. Number one, number two, I've had some health issues in my life that I'm not real public

about that have given me perspective on what really matters. And I feel like this, man, life is short. It's one game we're running around this place, right? Like, I'm willing to take risks. I'm willing to be myself. I'm willing. My dad just passed away about four weeks ago. I was with him when he passed away.

I was talking about my sister. This was our first New Year's and Christmas without my dad. And I was talking with my sister about this last night. I said, you know, Michelle, one thing that occurs to you when you're, this sounds so stupid, but when your dad dies in front of you or when a family member dies, you know, you're going to die. I'm going to die. And you know what? Well, my dad, this may sound really creepy, but you know what?

My dad didn't have to think about when he was passing away what the electric bill was that month, getting his car washed, what he was worried about. because it ends. So the things we stack on ourselves that we worry about, that we fear, it's all going to end. So why not live freely? Why carry these emotions and burdens and feelings and thoughts around that don't serve us when it's going to end anyway? You are eventually not going to worry, not going to fear, not going to worry what anybody

thinks about you because you will not be here. So why not accept that as a truth and begin to live that way right? now. Why carry with you thoughts, people, burdens, emotions that don't serve you when it's going to end? We dilute ourselves, I'm going to be like this forever. No, you're not. There's an end to it. So why not love it now? And so things that maybe would bother me or that wouldn't, you know, I was afraid to be successful. I was afraid it would change me. Here's the truth. It probably does change you. Here's the thing. Hopefully for the better. Hopefully become more generous, more connected to your faith, more giving. And to your point earlier, most of the most successful people I know,

I'm blown away by their generosity, their kindness, their willingness to give, their peace. So I'm not saying that success won't change you. I'm saying it probably will and it probably will be for the better. That's cool. And you don't want to be the same dude in 10 years you are now. You want to be a different dude. And the more successful you become, the more likely you can become that dude. The thing you're afraid of is you're going to be a worse dude. Yeah. And I'm telling you that's counterintuitive. I don't believe you can accumulate more and more wealth and more and more influence and simultaneously to be a worse person. I don't think they go together. So that fear is completely nonsensical, even though we all have it. The truth is in order

to get those things, you have to be a better person. So yeah, it'll change you and you want it to. We're going deep here today. Yeah, well, let me expand on that a little bit. And I know this is something we don't talk about on the show. But, you know, being that both David and are, you know, our Christian guys and you are as well. So like people, people know that and they reach out probably the most common question I get. And I'm guessing you get it as well is, well, how do you, and by the way, I think this is rooted in what I talked about earlier, the vegan effect of like people judging you. But how do you, how do you reconcile being wealthy with spirituality in your faith? Because they too shouldn't like, you know, the money is the root of all

evil, right? Is the eye of the needle. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah, the camel going through that. Yeah. How do you reconcile that? So how do you reconcile that? And I, you know, my own answers, I'm sure David has his own. But like, how do you reconcile the faith with wealth? Right. So one, I believe that if you are a Christian, the Lord would like his people favored. They'd like his children with the best educations and the safest neighborhoods, protected, growing, expanding his kingdom. That's number one.

I don't believe there's any correlation between having a lot of money and not having a lot of money and your depth of faith. I do understand what I think the Bible meant was what does come with a lot of money, is temptation, is access that you may not have otherwise to things that you need to be guarded against. And I think that those things matter. However, I'm a living example of my own life, and I'm not going to talk about what those things are of being able to return the blessing to other people, to magnify that blessing. Because here's the, I would never walk into a church. I would just never do that. I'm talking about prior to being a person of fate. I would just never. I wanted to leave church every Sunday when I was growing up.

I'm like, dad, let's go. Let's go play some football, right? Like, I'm a sinner saved by the grace of God. I have a bad temper. I can be honorary. I can be short. I can be abrupt. I have all of these things that aren't great about me,

but I am a person of faith, which gives me some grace. And that grace has helped me become successful. So I link my success ironically to my faith, not the other way around. Yeah. That's really good. David, I'm going to ask you the same question real quick. Like, how do you answer that question when people bring up? And I want people to know like this applies whether you're Christian or whether you're

another faith or even no faith, right? This is, it's the same thing. But how do you reconcile these things? I would say that there's what I don't like about the stigma of wealth is that it's, we treat wealth differently than success in any area of life. You don't hear people that are really fit getting criticized and said, you must be a terribly, egotistical human being if you want a six-pack. What a terrible thing to say that you want.

Imagine all the people that don't have six-packs and how you're going to make them feel. It does typically make you feel not as good about yourself when you see somebody who's fit. And then you have the choice, whether you want to let that drive you to go get fit or let it drive you to say something negative about them. But I think money's different

because it's so easy to take it from one person and give to another. I've said this before. I could not take Ed's biceps and give them to somebody else without them having to work for it. But if I could, I promise you, there would be a movement to do that. There would be an entire philosophy based around why should that person have bigger arms than

this person? It's not fair just because they were raised around a privileged gym where they were able to work out. We would take it from someone to give it to another. With money, you can do that very, very easily. So you get this whole philosophical belief system based around justifying doing that because frankly, you want what that person has. And you didn't want to have to go through the work. Like building wealth is there's a science to it just like getting in shape.

Right. Like Brandon, we say this all the time. Getting a six pack is not a mystery. It's not like I don't know how to get it. I just don't, I'm not committed to doing it. I don't want it bad enough. So that's why I don't have one.

I don't know the standards. It's exactly right. If I could have one if I adjusted by eating standards, my workout standard. It is that simple. A six pack is just a reflection of standards that you have. That's great. And that's why I think that there's a stigma against wealthy people because it helps

justify taking their wealth and giving it to someone that doesn't have it. But if we did this in every other area of life, it'd be horrified. If we went to very attractive people and said, it is not fair that you get to date all the other attractive people. You have to date these ugly people because it's not fair that that's their only option. People would say that's horrible. You're violating that person's autonomy. You can't force them to do it. But when it's let's take that person's wealth and give it to somebody else, well, of course, they're privileged that why should they get to have it? So when I hear the argument that wealthy people are, bad. In my mind, I just run it through. Would I believe that if we said attractive people are bad or

nice people are bad? If you're really funny, is that also bad because you're very likable? Obviously, I don't judge people for being funny. So I try to let it just pass through me when I hear that argument. I don't buy into it. And I would encourage everyone listening to do the same thing. When you hear arguments like that, stop for a minute and ask yourself, how does it benefit me or someone else to believe that. Is there some element of my own greed or laziness or sloth, that it makes that appealing and would it work in another situation? So basically, I mean, I don't really talk about that very often, but that's my thought process. It's good. All right. That's good. That's good. I'll throw one last point. Then I want to get into real estate.

When people have any of the wealth question, here's what I always say. If you're listening to a podcast, it means you probably have an iPhone or you have a Google phone or you know, you have a computer, right? You have a car. You are already wealthier than the most wealthy Pharisee. in Jesus' time. So I always just say, like, let's take out the judgment from that question because that's where a lot of the question is based in. It's like, well, how could you be so wealthy?

If you're in America, you are already wealthy. You are already at the point where you are being warned in multiple faiths about the danger of wealth. You were already there. So let's all know we're not the same. We're all wealthy. And so like, yeah, take the eye out. Great points.

Thank you. All right. All right. So let's talk about wealth building, right? We asked you before the show started. We said, Edgy, what's your real estate thing? You're like, you know, about $100 million of real estate recently. Like what the heck is that?

Like, let's talk about that. Like, what do you knew? What's real estate to you? It's not normal that I do that much, by the way. I wish it were, but it's not. So just in all in all transparency, that was a significant year for me. Real estate has always been my passion, meaning I got into personal development originally because I went to a Robert Allen, how to buy real estate, no money down

seminar, which led me into Carleton Sheets and all these other guys. And I was, I made my. my first deal when I was in college, I bought a house on a lease option. And I've always been fascinated with the real estate business. So what I decided to do was to create other businesses that could be sort of my funding source to do deals. I'm not your typical real estate investor where I'm comfortable with loads and loads of debt. If I were, I'd be wealthier.

I'm a little bit debt adverse. And I'm saying that because I could be better. I think some of my upbringing still rings and they're like, we're going to go broke, you know, and all that stuff. But real estate to me has been my passion all my life. It still is. I like making deals. I like negotiating deals. I like creative deals. I'm sort of known as a creative person when I do them. I've made money most of the time, although I've done two deals this year that I lost significant amount of money on, which is not normal for me. But I'm, I'm into the art of the deal. I like cash flow properties.

I also like flipping things. I like people say, I just do multi-unit. Okay, that's cool that you specialize there. I just do good deals. Yeah. So if I can find a duplex that I can can flip. I'll buy it. I'm in escrow right now on a $250,000 duplex. I'm going to make 60 grand. That's cool. Like I sold it before I bought it. Like it's a little dinky deal. You go, why would you bother with that? Because I brought my son into the deal and I want to teach him how to do a deal. I'm also buying a $25 million ocean front home right now that I'm not going to keep. It's not for me. So I buy all, I'm doing all different deals. And I don't recommend that. If someone says, I'm going to specialize in multi-unit become an expert in that or residential or

rehabs or whatever. I just love real estate. That's the least. known thing about me is that I love making deals. I'm always looking at deals. And I've found what I have done that's been critical to me is I have surrounded myself again with people who are winners in that space. I bounce my ideas. I do my deals with them. I have them reevaluate them with me. And I spent the whole weekend doing it this weekend, as a matter of fact. Like, I love doing that and I hope I do more and more of it. I just wish I was a little bit more risk tolerant than I have been all my career. That's my negative is risk tolerance. I've got the same issue. I was thinking of it when I was driving in for this podcast today,

just how I was wrestling in my own head with the fact that I would be much further ahead. But everything I look at is like I was thinking of my mind, I'm a defensive investor. So am I. Right? I'm always playing to not lose. And it's still, if you're taking action, you're still moving the ball down the field. I could be worse at the same time. But there are times where I know there's a very small chance this won't work. And I still won't do it just because of that small chance. Because like you, I'm thinking, well, I don't want to lose what I've already. got. You know the other reason why, and this is not a bad thing, bro. Let's talk about this

for a minute. I told you about the, I've done about 92 million in deals this year. And a friend of mine was reading that back to me this weekend, we're pitching me to buy a deal and the guys got two buyers. And the pitch was, I'm the more real buyer because I've done so many deals this year. So it was like, it wasn't him bragging about me. It was more like selling the seller on me. And I have a lot more friends who used to be rich than currently are. Way more. And I tell young investors this all the time. Listen to me again. I have far more friends who used to be rich that no longer are than are currently rich. And the reason is they started to do deals that were outside their risk tolerance, that they could stomach, that they understood just to be doing better and different deals.

And so, yeah, I could be a little bit wealthier than I am, but I am also wealthy because I've not had monster losses on things. And so I want to lose a little of that as I get old because now it's to the point we're like, I really don't, I can lose on deal. Right. Yeah. And so I don't think that's necessarily a negative thing. And people that are listening to this that are real estate people, don't give that part of you up because I'm older than most of you. And I do have a lot of friends who used to do very well in real estate. And that one cycle, they just didn't come back from. And we may be entering that cycle again. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. I mean, there's a huge component of it, like you're saying, that when everything is coming easy, it's easy to think it's always going to

becoming easy. And I got started in investing right at the last crash, 2009. when I bought my first deal. So I watched my career was built on the mistakes of people that had come five years before me. So I know that colored a lot of how I'm looking at it. But what I was thinking of is I was thinking about how we often talk about a boxer like Floyd Mayweather or a UFC fighter. Floyd Mayweather has the best record of anybody in boxing. But I don't hear a ton of people that love him or make the argument that he's the best fighter ever because it looks like he dodged fights he might lose. He only took a fight he knew he could win. And the same with a lot of UFC fighters. And I tend to respect the guys that take a fight that they know that they're not guaranteed to win it.

They could lose. It doesn't affect how I look at their skill in fighting. If you lost a guy earlier in your career who's better than you or you fought a guy bigger than you, I lose zero respect. I lost no respect for Michael Jordan when he came back to the Wizards, like everyone said. I gained respect that this guy's willing to go in there at a clear disadvantage because of his age and still compete. Right. I liked seeing that.

So what I was thinking with myself is, am I dodging? fights that that I don't know I can win because those losses often have a much bigger impact on my life than the wins. But it doesn't. The question is this. Like I work with a fighter named Mikey Garcia. A lot of you guys who know he is he was undefeated. He took a fight with a guy named Errol Spence. And the guy was way bigger. Shouldn't have probably fought him, but I respected me. He did it. He lost 11 of the 12 rounds. But he got to fight again. In real estate, if you're going to take that loss, it better not be where you can't fight again. That's what I was thinking. You can't. So there's a difference.

Get traumatic brain injury in that loss. Right. Exactly. So I've always been able to fight again, I guess is my point. Right. And I just love the business. I believe it's the funnest way to get wealthy. I love what you guys do in it. That's how I found you guys. That's how I knew who you guys were. I love people that teach people to do it, discuss it and make it more real. I'm a product. Someone like you guys intrigued me 100 million years ago and got me to believe that I could be in the real estate space and put deals together and they were right. I really learned how to do deals, you know? So I love this space and I'm thrilled that there are guys like you that still, I know you're doing this show and the other one

and all that. But like I love that or the different episodes. I love that you bring this to people's attention because every age, I know I have a friend of mine who's 68 years old who's doing his first deals now. And then I got my son's 18 and we just did our first deal together. I love that part of the business. That's so good. That's so good. How many kids you have? I have two. I have a 19 year old boy today. It's his birthday and a 17-year-old daughter. All right. Most investors spend more time chasing deals than reviewing their insurance. But a quick coverage check can be fast, easy,

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19 years, you've built a lot of your success and your name today while having that family, that life. So how do you balance the family, the work, the ambition with the, you know, I just want to spend time with the family. How do you balance that? Because it's something that I'm biggest struggle of my life. Yeah. Biggest struggle of my entire life. is that the guilt of when I'm so here's so words I don't think you can balance it number one I think you're out of balance it's a matter of recalibrating all the time yeah I did a poor job of it when my children were young and I know this is over said but here's what I just finally concluded here's what I do I'm present where I am so I used to be I'd be with my kids and I'm on my phone doing deals

and looking at stuff and so the worst thing in the world happened to me one time my daughter walked into the room daddy and then she walked in she put a dress on I look down at my phone and looked away from her. Just, you know, you do that. And what that said to her was, who's ever in this phone is more important than you? I didn't need to say a word. And I watched her face change and she turned around and walked out of the room before I looked back up. And I went, that's it. So a couple things I do that are strategies. When I come home, my phone stays in the car for an hour because I can't trust myself. Yep. So literally when I come home, my phone stays in my car for one hour. I do not have it in my possession. I walk in and I'm present. My kids don't want me

to be there for eight or nine hours present. They get sick of me too. They need me to be there right away when I come home, bring energy, dad's home, boom, be there. That's at every single age. They don't need eight or nine hours. And quite frankly, many men aren't wired to be eight or nine straight hours with a child. They need a break for 15 minutes. I have buddies of mine that go into the bathroom and pretend to be taken a poop so they can get away from their family and kids for 30 minutes.

And so if you have that innately in you, I know all the dudes are laughing right. They're like, I actually do that, right? So just get some damn alone time, right? Some men are wired. Like, I can go 29 straight hours with my kids. no break whatsoever. I'm that dude, I need a little bit of a break. Just to, you know, I may that sounds cold, but I need a little bit of a break. So I've learned me, I'm present with my, today. When we're done with this, I have one other call. I'm taking the rest of the day off.

I'm playing golf with my son. It's his birthday. I'm a present father, but I'm gone a lot. And so I just try to bring my energy. Here's the mistake I made. I was one energized dude on a podcast or a speech or in public. And then I'd come home and there was nothing to give my family, even when I was there. I was a little grumpy, little quiet, little distracted, you know, a little bit aloof, almost, even with my own family. And my dad actually said to me, I was, how about you be that dude in here? And every once in a while, be a little bit tired and aloof in public. And I'm like, you're right. And so I just give them my best energy. I'm the leader of the family. I'm supposed to bring the gain, that energy, the pizzazz, the juice. And I do a really good job of it,

knowing that I'm going to be out of balance all of the time. The other thing is you don't give yourself enough credit that your kids are duplicating. The reason I'm a hard worker is I watched my old man work his ass off. He was gone at five and came back when it was dark out every single day. And my kids have seen someone work their tail off. The second thing is I happen to have a wife who I met in kindergarten who's my complete polar opposite. She's got no ambition, no drive, no goals, nothing written down whatsoever. Yep. But incredibly high standards as to what she wants to be as a mother. So it comes very natural to her. So she's let me be who I am most of the time. So that's how it's worked. That's exactly my relationship with my wife, Heather. Like, I can't get her on the show.

I mean, we're 400 episodes in now. And I can't get my wife. Yeah, she's like, I don't want to do that show. I have no, I want to be known. Like, I don't have an Instagram you could follow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I can't put her on Instagram. I can't tag her in anything. And you know, I used to think, man, for the menless side. Like, yeah, we'd be cool, man. What if you're something who's like a running mate, you know? We drive each other crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I had enough juice and ambition and drive for 700 people. I need someone who's my opposite who just like, it's going to be okay. Like, yeah, can we just enjoy tonight? So that's what I have to. Same thing. Well, that's what I was thinking of as you were talking is that there's different ways we expel energy. I think all three of us here are

sprinters. I go into it with everything I have. I pick that up playing sports. I got two and a half minutes before the next time out in a basketball game. I'm, I need to be exhausted when I hit that point. But when you're exhausted, you're not, you don't have a lot to offer. You need to go just rest. And you need to pair yourself with a marathon person. Like it sounds like your wife, she knows like, okay, I'm doing this and I'm doing this. I can't be caught without energy, which allows you, Ed, to go out there and swing for the knockout. And then when you're recovering, they're going.

And Brandon and Heather, I watch them. They're the same way. Heather is like never misses a thing. Brandon's out there doing a million things at once and then just, very true. She's a marathoner and I'm a sprinter. And by the way, not to be really corny, but I do. catch her with her pants down a lot. And let me tell you. I know as soon as I said that. I'm going there. You know when you said it. But I'm going to go there. People have asked me like,

what's a key to a marriage? One of the keys. Because I've had a long one. Yeah. Yeah, you got to be best friends. Right. But I don't want to live with one of you two who could be my best friends. You know exactly what you're saying. These are important things that are never talked about on podcast. Yeah. Your wife's got to be your best friend. Make sure you have open lines of communication. Yeah. Make sure you catch each other with your pants down. too enough. And there's a lot of people listening this right now going, you know what, man, that is one of our problems in our marriage. We've got the kids. We're busy. Things have changed. It's not like it was before. I'm expending all this energy outside. She's doing what she's doing.

You better have time for that stuff to have a rich marriage in life that'll continue to push you to be successful elsewhere. That is not a small thing. What we just talked about is a huge thing for me in my relationship because we don't have a perfect relationship. I've known her 40 years. Like you just run out of stuff to talk about. You guys meant Gine Garden, right? Yeah. More than 40 years, 45 years. Yeah, wow.

So this is an important part of it. To the point of you being a generous man, Ed, thank you for saving me for using a terrible analogy when I was talking about. I owe you one, brother. Go ahead, Brandon. You don't catch her with her pants down there. Well, you'd be surprised. Oh, that's funny.

That's funny, man. All right, well, we got to start wrapping this thing up because I know we got to get out of here. And Ed, this has been fantastic. We have four final questions we like to ask everybody at the end of our show. So it's time for our famous four. This is the part of the show where we ask the same four questions to every guest every week. So Ed, the first question that we ask is, what's your, we ask what's your favorite real estate related book? Now, you're not necessarily like the real estate guest that we went to bring on.

Do you have a real estate book? If not, I have an alternate question we ask people when they don't do real estate. Yeah, I like the art of the deal, even though he didn't write it. All right. I do. I like the art of the deal. So I liked it because I love the art of the deal. I love putting the deal together. I think to be great, not to be long winded, but to be great at real estate, you have to have a passion for putting the deals together, not just the math, not just the numbers, but some passion to put a deal together. And so I'm a big believer in that and the ability to

negotiate. So that would be one. Awesome. All right. You have a favorite business book. Max out your life by Ed Milette. And how have I not read that book yet? Are you crazy? I'm going to pick it up today. I'm not again. I'm going to put it. Actually, I'll give you one that you've not heard of everybody.

I just reread the E-myth by Michael Gerber. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's a tremendous business book. So good. It's just undervalued. E-Mith, Michael Gerber. Yeah, so good.

So good. All right. When you're not making tons of content, crushing it in sports, building up a big empire of wealth and real estate. What are some of your hobbies? Like to, well, I do work out, but I'm a big comedy club guy. If you know, a lot of the clients that I, work with. A lot of them are comedians. I've had them on my show. I love the laugh man. I love

brilliant people. I'm a comedy club addict before COVID. I just adore brilliant people who can get up and walk to a microphone and create laughter in a room. And because I'm a public speaker, I study their nuances, their intricacies, the way they deliver their message. I love comedy. Who are some of your favorites? Who are some of your favorites? Sebastian Manascalco, who's been on my show, was one of my best friends. I like, there's a guy that just passed away. No one's ever heard of named Kevin Meaney, who is just a very different stand-up.

Whitney Cummings, who's been on my show. I think is brilliant. I think Kevin Hart's very, very funny. Probably my favorite guy, though, is Dave Chappelle. Okay, yeah. I just think he's brilliant, and I love people that make you think that are different. I've seen Norm McDonald probably 30 times.

I just love the quirky, weird dudes, just a bunch. I'm many of these guys, Frank Caliando is an impressionist. Oh, so good. So good. Frank is absolutely hilarious and it's the funnest thing in the world to get voice notes from a dear friend like that because it's never him. Good morning. Morgan Freeman.

I get, I get birthday wishes from, you know, Al Pacino and John Madden. And so that's a thing, man. Like those are brilliant artists, literally brilliant artists. Ray Romano is a neighbor of mine. Ray is brilliant. I love his type of comedy. Seinfeld, I think, is stand up. I didn't like the show.

I do like Jerry's stand-up. They're just all, there's so many. They're brilliant people. Yeah, that's what it is. They're like you, I don't think people understand the brilliance that goes into an amazing comedian. Like, it's not just like they're funny people. No, and to know them, there's the art of the deal.

So I love to watch them start to work on a bit a year and a half before they actually refine it on stage, you know, like, hey, I got this thing I'm working on about tricycles and bananas, you know? And then they work it out over a year and negotiate it and then try it in front of the audience. and the risk that you're willing to take when you're a comedian and you're doing new material. Brand new. I relate to this as a speaker. Like brand new stuff.

You're like, ah, that doesn't work. You know, so the whole, it's an art of the deal. It's not that far removed from being successful at other things. That's awesome.

Frank Kellyando is the Bo Jackson of comedians. Remember when we were, when we were watching, but we didn't quite know how amazing of a person we were watching until later. We look back, we're like, what was that guy doing? Right.

How did you all of it? I'll give you one Frank Caliando anecdote. I go to see him for the first time. He knows I'm going to be there. He comes out, and by the way, only half the audience probably knows who I am, right?

The other half of like, who's he doing? He did the first 10 minutes of the show as me. Oh, no way. You talk about the guts that takes. Half these people at least have no idea who I am. He's coming on, Mr. Max,

up, man, that's all your life. And he does this whole. And he wouldn't stop it for like 10 minutes. And I'm like, Frank, this is not killing. That's funny. No clue.

Who the hell you're talking about right? He did not care. He was going to do that show as me. So that was pretty awesome. That's so funny. All right. Last question for me. What do you think separates successful people?

If you had to narrow down to one thing, successful people from those who give up or they fail or they never get started. Their will to win can't be bought. So I have this thing that I've been talking about a lot lately that your will to win can't be for sale. For most people, here's the truth, because I almost got there. With enough failure, enough rejection, or even enough success, their will to continue to win can be purchased for a price with enough pain, enough suffering,

or even enough success, you've seen this too, they just relent. And they go, yeah, it's enough or it wasn't for me or it didn't quite work out. No, you sold your family, man. You sold your dream. You sold your destiny. You sold your will to win. You cashed in the chips. You cashed them in.

For most people, enough failure, they'll relent eventually. Or then you've seen this other guys. I got enough money now. I got enough this. Their reasons were that they relent their will to win. For me, and I know you've heard me talk about this before, but it's a deep-seated thing with me. I believe I'm going to die someday. We've talked about faith.

I believe God created me to be a particular dude. I believe he introduces you to the dude you could have been. I think he literally says, hey, Ed, here is the dude you could have been that you were born to be, the experiences, the memories, the places, the contributions, the contributions, the family, the friends, all of it. Here's who you could have been. And to me, that's why I'm here today. I'm chasing that guy. I want to be him. that's who I'm capable of being. Heaven is you die and you meet that person,

your identical twins. Hell is you meet this person you could have been and you're complete strangers. And you live in eternity knowing you didn't become the man you could have been when you were here or the woman. And so for me, I'm chasing that guy. So my will cannot be bought because I'm ultimately chasing that dude. It's not a dollar amount or a podcast or an amount of downloads or who loves me or doesn't love me. I'm chasing that. guy, God made me to be ultimately, and I'm miles away, miles away. The thing I admire about my dad, I'll tell you last for your audience. My dad had been sober 34 years. It'll be 35 years this April. My dad had lung issues. So my dad was literally like ventilator, respirator. Before they took my dad

away to the hospital the last time, my dad's whole life was about helping other people get sober. And he did this anonymously in AA. I never met any of these people, although it is service I learned about them. Convicts getting up, entertainers. Ed Milet changed my dad. My dad had the same name as me. It's pretty emotional to hear. As my dad's being pulled away, no joke, guys, my dad's being pulled away in the ambulance with oxygen on. He cannot breathe. I mean, watching your father struggle to breathe like three breaths a minute, four breaths a minute, it's pretty emotional. My dad's phone keeps ringing and he's got it in his hand on the stretcher that he's on there pulling away in. My dad grabs the phone, pulls the oxygen out, and he takes a call. He takes a

call from a man who was struggling to go back to drinking again who he was sponsoring. And my dad stopped. I've never said this ever. My dad stopped the two men driving the ambulance and said, please stop. And I watched him. And he talked to this man like that for 30 minutes and saved him, put the oxygen back in and four days later, my dad died. But what I admire about my father is my dad was still chasing that dude up until the very end because it wasn't about it was who he was it was who he was capable of being it was one more person he could help i'm not that good a man i'm not even close to that but i admire and love my dad so much because he could never articulate it like i just said it will to win and chasing that dude he was just constantly being the man he was capable of

becoming up until his last literally his last breaths no joke And so for me, that's the example that I get really emotional about that. But that's the example that I want to set when I'm saying I'm chasing the dude. You are not going to buy my will to win. That ain't who I am. And I hope people listening to this are watching it, you can't be bought either with success or failure. Thank you. Thank you.

Yeah. Thanks for sharing that. That was very powerful. My honor. Ed, for people that want to know more about you, where it's the best place for them to find out. Edmylet.com, M-Y-L-E-T-T or Instagram, Ed Mylet, all my stuff, YouTube, whatever you want. All right, man. Well, thank you so much. It's been phenomenal. And, yeah, this is one of those episodes I'm going to listen to several times. So thank you. Honored. I'm so impressed with both

of you, by the way, sincerely. So thank you. And you know, I've got to jump on this other thing, but it's been my honor. If I can do it again, let me know how I can help. Awesome, man. Thanks, thank you. And happy birthday, Max, go beat your dad at golf. I'll tell him he said that. All right. Take care. All right. Now was our talk with Ed Milette. Man, I've been looking for that interview for quite some time. And, man, man, man, man. I totally delivered. I just, I love his way of storytelling, his way of explaining things, his way of seeing the world for what it is and what it isn't. Just really, really good stuff. David, what did you get out of today show?

Such a powerful mindset that he's got. I mean, that's what we all really need. And I'll tell you what I thought was really cool is that he got started in real estate. He, his old journey started by going to an event where they were teaching to buy real estate with no and low money down. And now he's created an entire empire built on basically the principles and brand. Turner's book. So thank you, Brandon. Well, it's pretty much me that made Ed successful. I mean, we all know that. So, uh, wow, what a great, yeah, what a great show. I'm just to like buzz in from this interview. I would think the most important thing we talked about. Well, there was a lot of them, but in my opinion would be the standards concept that. Yeah, so good. Don't set goals, set standards.

I mean, that is brilliant. We've kind of touched on that maybe in the last couple months, just if you want to raise your success race standards. But when Ed Milet is telling you, the only thing, that separates a successful person from a not-accessful person is their standard. It's pretty powerful. Yeah, that's so good. So, like, Brandon, I'll give you this. You tell people analyze 100 deals. Now, you know when you're doing that, you're helping them get over their fear of making a bad decision. You're helping build up their excellence. But what you are really doing is forcing them to develop a standard of analyzing 100 deals before they even write an offer. And the things you pick up in the process of analyzing 100 deals will raise your standards in other areas of real estate, wealth building, management leverage, recognizing patterns and whatever you're trying to do. It does a ton for you.

And that's what I'd say going into 2021 when I'm most passionate about myself and in others is let's just attack where we have low standards and raise those and let success come to us. Yeah. An example of that would be like, hey, my goal is lose 20 pounds. My standard is I want to be somebody who works out every day. That was actually something I said a year ago. I said, I want to be somebody who works out every single day or just about every single day. I'm like, I don't want to be crazy. Right. So like I said like so then I said a goal of working out 300 times last year, which I hit. And so, but I don't care about the 300.

If I got 299 or 298, I mean, the standard is I don't miss my goal. That's another standard. But the number is not as important. What I'm trying to develop is to be somebody who is somebody who works out. That's a standard. I work out. Like, I work out regularly. This year, I'm shifting to my standard.

A couple things I'm working towards. Number one is really like being a person who just takes care of their body by what they eat. And I don't have a really great phrase for that yet. and I'm going to come up with something good. But, like, I'm, again, I'm not going to go straight vegan. I don't want to be straight vegan. I like meat occasionally. But I want to be somebody who like just, oh, yeah, I just don't.

Like, think of Ed. Like, Ed, like, you guys, if you guys knew what Ed looked like. If you're listening to this, you don't know what he looks like. The guy is like a chiseled Greek god. I don't know. Like, the guy is, like, just built and works out. You can clearly see and eats super healthy. Like, I don't see him just sitting around eating like three like nachos, like three

helpings and nachos because he's at the movies. That's just what he does, right? Like, he just, it wouldn't even occur. He mentioned the word identity earlier, and that's kind of where, like, I want my identity. I want my standard to be somebody who just doesn't reach for the chocolate, who doesn't reach for the sugar. My standard is I just drink water, a lot of it, and I eat really nutritious food, mostly plants. And so, like, that sounds like a really good standard. Another standard that I'm working toward is to be someone like, and maybe you could call it a goal,

but I don't think so. I think this is where he's getting that standard. Remember how he tells that story about the kid, his daughter, when he, his daughter comes in the room and he looks down at his phone. So I have done this exact thing. I don't even mean to. It's just like, Rosie will be talking to me and I will look down. And I see the same thing. She's like, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, can I talk to you?

So what I'm working at this year and not what I'm working at, what I'm, the person I'm becoming is somebody, my kids don't see me out with my phone ever. Like that's kind of my new rule is like my kids do not see me with a phone. Like I can be on the phone. If I'm in the bathroom, fine. I'll scroll my Instagram or whatever. But if I'm in the room of my kid,

I don't want them ever see me touching my phone unless I'm getting GPS directions in the car. Like that's just a standard that I want to set for myself because I don't want to ever again see my daughter or my son like, you know, take second place to that phone. So again, another standard that I'm working on. What about you? I love how intentional you are about that. That's just something I keep telling you that I see you doing and really excelling at is you say, okay, I see an area where I need to raise a standard. Let's say it's working out. And I want everyone else to understand what Brandon's doing because this will work for anyone.

then you say what would stop me from working out? Well, first off, my willpower. I don't really love working out. Brandon, would you admit you're not really a workout? I hate the gym. I hate the gym. I hate running. Yes. It was not your identity as a young person to work out. Working out is much easier for me. Eating, eating wood good is very hard, I would say for me. But I grew up playing sports, so working out's normal. You say, all right, my willpower will let me down. And you've literally said when I say, hey, this go lift weights. You're like, I got to drive. It's like 12 minutes there. Then I got to drive 12 minutes back. I might hit a red light. Then I got a shower. I don't want to do it. That's all it takes to break your will.

So you say, I'm going to have them come to me because I don't like letting people down and I don't like disappointing them. So if my personal trainer shows up at my place, I'm going to work out. It's so simple and so brilliant. Now you're getting workouts in. And I see you applying that same principle to everything else. Okay, here's an area where I'd like results. Here's the standard that I'd have to improve.

Here's the thing I will do to make sure that I don't cheat myself out of it. And that three-step process, I'm watching your life change. You're getting to become your own version of a tan. a chiseled version of Groot from Guardians of the Galaxy. It's very impressive. Now, I'm feeling the heat from you, to be honest, because you're in my top five people I spend time with to raise my own standards, which is exactly what Ed talked about in the show today.

Well, thank you for that. That's, it's interesting how this stuff applies to our life. Like everything Ed's saying, a guy worth, you know, hundreds of millions of dollars or whatever. I don't know. It's exact net worth. It's huge. But, like, how this stuff applies,

whether you're talking about trying to, buy your first duplex, you're trying to lose 10 pounds. You're trying to improve your marriage with your spouse. Like the same concepts apply across the board. Go back and listen to this episode again. If you feel like you maybe need another pick up in the future, pick me up in the future, or you just want like to just really dig into what he's saying. Because this stuff, if you apply this, this will, this stuff he talked about today will make you successful.

Now, before we get out of here today, I do, like I said, I want to play that clip from the Gobundance. I think it was winter event last year. I think it was where it was from last January, I believe. because yeah, I did wilder two months old, so I couldn't get there. So go listen now. We're going to play that right now for you and enjoy. This is me and my son. My son's a golfer, was a golfer, but I was a baseball player, pretty good baseball player,

and we ended up moving back to the same hometown. My wife and I met when we were five and four years old. And we grew up on the same street. And then ultimately, I moved back to that same town. My mom and dad, her mom and dad, all three of my sisters, all her sisters, eight of them, live in this town. So when my son started to play sports, it was the same little league field I played on, and my daughter's very coordinated. She's me. My son, probably there should be a DNA test, right? He's just, he's much bigger. He's not coordinate. In fact, to this day, he's so uncoordinated.

I do not know if my son is left or right-handed. So when he can play baseball, he went left-eater-righty, left-eater-righty. This poor kid has done more of these on fly balls and got hit in the face. Like, he cannot catch a freaking ball to save his life. And it was just getting bad in sports, and I wouldn't push it, but I didn't coached. I don't want to be compared. I don't have any of you relate to this. And my son played sports. Then we moved to the desert.

And when I moved to the Palm Desert area, a lot of professional golfers live out there. I'm like, Max should pick up golf. Again, we went left to right, left to right. We couldn't figure it out. Finally, I just made sports all about fun. So for years, my son golf, this is at a golf tournament at the Madison Club we were at. And my son is this kid. I'm a goofy guy, and my son kind of had used clubs, and I was as golf coach with no lessons,

and just rag tag. You can't tell, but his hats on crooked and just a terrible player. And so we would play in these tournaments every week, and I loved it because I would caddy. And I thought, because I'm a busy guy, I'd get the five hours with my boy, and we'd have year after year of these beautiful times together. And I was like, I'd tell him before every tournament, hey, whether you win or lose, daddy loves you the same, right? If you win by 10 shots, he goes, I know, Dad, if I lose by 10, you love me just the same.

And he would take me up on it and lose by 10 shots. Every week, week after week, my son would finish last, last, last, last, second to last, last, last. There was nothing wrong with it. We were having a good time. It really was bonding. And he's such a sweet boy. He'd top one into a lake, and the other kid, he had a good drive. Good drive, Ian.

That was awesome, because he's got all the stuff I teach, right? He was sincerely happy if you'd birdie and he'd get a 12. Right? And I've already cussed twice. Forgive my language. It's just for this use of this story. Okay. So we've done that for years. And every week I'd caddy, I'm out there in Adidas and I'm big dude at the time and tank top on and my tattoos. And we're playing against pro golfers. They're matching clothes. The dad's dressed to the nines. This guy you just saw on TV last week. And I'm just encouraging my kid. These other dads are really stern. So finally, it was a life-changing day for my son. And I just share this with you because maybe it'll be for you as a dad, a businessman. man, whatever. We'd play nine holes, and I get emotional, I'd tell you this, but we'd play nine, and my son was down by 12 shots in last place. And at that tournament, there was a T-box over there, they would give the kids lunch. Well, this day, the lunches were way over there, and the T-box is like several hundred yards away. And one of the dads who I didn't like, who I won't say

his name, we'll call him Dick, which is actually his name. Very fitting. He, uh, Mr. dressed up and he's won some professional tournaments and his kid was a beast and my kid's rag tag. And anyway, at the turn, he says, hey, guys, why don't you guys go to the T-box? Have Max go grab your sandwiches. He's not in this thing anyways. Max, go get their sandwiches. And Max goes, okay. I said, stop. I said, no, can I cuss one time? Or not? It's going to offend. Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. I said, what the fuck did you just say to my son? I said, don't you ever fucking talk to my son like that again?

You understand me? You never talk to my son like that again. And I was the nice dad. I said, I tell you what, we'll go get the sandwiches. And I'm shaking. And little Max was there, and I got down like this. Max is 10 years old. I said, come here.

I said, Max. I said, we're going to fucking win today. That's it. That's it. You understand me? And I'm holding him. Dad, he's scared the hell of him. He goes, Dad, you love me with it.

I go, not today. No one talks to our family like that. You hear me? We're going to win, Max. You've got a great swing. All of a sudden, all this stuff I teach, I never did. You've got a beautiful swing. We can kick these guys' ass, Max.

We're going to do this. Here's what we're going to do. I never did this. I said, I pick the club. You don't get to pick the club. Daddy's going to tell you exactly what club to hit. Look at my hand right now. Okay?

Look at it. I'm serious. I said, Daddy's going to pick the club, okay? And you don't practice swing. You just do your thing. You take that beautiful swing of yours. We're going to fucking win today, Max. My son had never heard me cuss.

Just so you know, my wife's father is a pastor, so is her brother. He ain't ever heard these words before. I said, we're going to win. And I'm touching them. And I said, I'll go get the sandwiches. You walk up to that T-box and I said, you grab a three-iron. He goes, Dad, it's a drive. I'm going to, I just got dizzy.

I'm so fired up. Seriously. I said, you hit that three-iron down there because I know if he hits a driver's going to go into another damn house. We're down 12 shots, man. with nine to go. 28 kids in this damn tournament. And I go grab the sandwiches and I watch him walking

with his little golf bag and like Max always walked. And I come and getting him and I'm watching them from a distance. I see this three iron perfect swing right down the middle. And I get up there and he kind of hands me the club.

Here you go, Dad. And I go, we're going to win. We're going to win. Grace, how that feeling? He goes, so good, Dad. We get to the middle of the fairway. I got an eight iron in. I go, Max, hit this eight iron,

no practice swings. Hit this thing 10 feet left at the pin. Let's get this thing. I'd never talk to him like that. Now we're talking about winning. I can't even finish this story. I'm so out of breath. This is not to play to you.

I'm dead serious, man. So he hits this eight iron about 20 feet left of the pin. He kind of twirls the club back at me. And a hand I'm carrying his bag now. He's kind of walking down the fairway like this. I'd never seen my son walk like that before. This is becoming a different young man. We get to the green.

Normally Max just walks up, puts. I said, hey, read the putt, buddy. Read the putt. And he's kind of looking on. both sides of the putt. Has no idea what he's actually looking at. Just kind of, no idea. He's kind of giving it one of these.

He gets up. Takes the putter back. God's so good. By the way, takes a butter. Drain over. Birdie. Yeah, buddy. Yeah. Never made a damn birdie before. How's that feeling? He goes, I feel good, Dad.

The other guy's like, it's just a birdie, dude. It's one hole. I'm like, it's that amazing. They never do that with their kid. They never celebrate. It's all business. So we get to the next hole. it's a par five, this is how good God is. Max bombs a driver down the middle. They all hit their drives.

It's a lake on a par five. They all lay up. We got to go. We're down 11 now. I go, hit the three wood on the green, buddy. He's like, Dad, it's 220. He's 10 years. I go, smash this three wood, pal. And he gets over it, comes back, hits a beautiful three wood. I'm going, Jesus, please, if you've ever given me anything, all the sinning, just sit in a sit in a for one minute. Give me one, man. And this thing's in the air. And there's this brick wall with rock on it. And we're so far away. Please, God. Please. And it hits, and he goes on the wall. I'm like, my heart sinks straight up in the air from where we are. This is true story. I swear to you. So I'm up there. And somehow it had gone forward onto the green, rolls forward into the cup for a deuce.

for a two on a part five. Yeah. Can you believe this, buddy? He's like, God, it went in the freaking hole. I'm taking pictures. And I'm watching that you, dad, you're like,

what the fuck's going on with Max? What happened on the sandwich break? Fast forward. 17th hole. He's down a shot. He's down a damn shot. He's in second place. Dick's son's in first,

the other kid's in third. Gets over to hole. I said, now, I said, Max, He has another eight arm. I said, hit that eight feet left of the hole. Put that thing tight. He goes, okay, dad, hits it about eight feet left of the hole. Now every single pup max is really reading it.

What do you think, dad, tough feet, left to right break? Yeah, sounds good, dude. Right? Makes another birdie. We're even going into 18. My son is now even. Shoulders are back, walking strong. 18 hits his drive down the middle.

All three boys do. And he's still down one. Forgive me. He's down one on 18. He's down two on 17. Now he's down one on 18. So, no, he's not, he's even. He's even.

There's a lake in front of the hole. Max is the longer of the three balls. I hear Dick say to his son. I won't say his son's name. Hey, don't hit it in the lake. I said, Max, he's going to hit it in the lake. You don't tell someone what not to do, man. Sure enough, he dunks it in the lake.

I said, Max, eight iron again. It was another eight iron. Just hit this thing 10 feet left of the hole, man. Let's get the hell out of here. He goes, okay, Dad. He hits about 15 feet left of the hole. This little boy was a great player. He gets up, chips it to about an inch, taps in.

So here's the deal. Max has a putt. If he two putts, they tie and go to a playoff. If he won putts, they win. Now, Mr. Max out, stupid me over here, who's telling him what to do all day. We get to the green, and I kind of do a little bit of what the other dad says. I go, hey, Max, this thing's downhill. Don't hit it too far past the hole.

We two putt, we get out of here. My little boy, who's never said anything like this to my life, he goes, Dad, I'm going to make it. I said, well, knock this sucker in. Let's get the hell out of here with the victory, buddy. He goes, all right, dad. Sure enough, walks over the putt, gives it his bullshit look that he always does. Gets over that thing, takes the putter back.

That thing was halfway to the hole, and he's walking it in the cup. Bam, drains it, it pulls it out. Yeah, Dad! We are, there's no one there, but you'd have thought we'd have won the damn masters. Now, let me show you something. Let me just show you this. That's my son warming up. that day, on the range.

I didn't tell you another thing. You know, a tiger wears red on Sunday? Max had a blue shirt in his golf back. So when he got the sandwiches, I said, I want you to switch shirts. Put your blue shirt on. That's going to be your winning shirt today, buddy. Just to change his identity.

So he changed to the blue shirt. This is him winning the medal that day. That's my little guy. Look at that face. Okay? Now, watch this. Watch this. Watch this.

I'm not bragging because he still, we don't know if he's left or right-handed. He won 17 straight tournaments after that day. That's him shooting 64 winning. That's me and him last two weeks ago in Cabo. I told you, there's a genetic difference. And that's him signing his full-ride golf scholarship last week. He's going to play college golf.

Why do I tell you that? What's the lesson there? My son stopped playing golf and decided to win at golf. He got intentional about winning. So I'm telling you, got to get intentional about winning in your life. You got to get intentional with your family about winning. Maybe you're doing really well compared to what? Compared to who? What if you ran for a week with me? What if you ran for the week with guys I run with? You got to get intentional about what.

What changed my son's life was deciding he was going to compete to win and not just play, not just frivolously go through the motions and the exercise of golfing, but intending to win. There's a power to intending to win, to getting clear about what you're going. you want and lasering in on it. And then the momentum of getting that going, as good as you are now, I'm a totally different man than I was 10 years ago, because I've got life momentum. I'm stacking win on top of win, on top of win. So when I lose, that's the aberration. It's like now when he misses a putt, he literally says, that's not me. Whereas before it was automatic. It wasn't him to make one. You've got to get intentional about winning where the aberration is when you lose. You

You got to get a little bit more attention, a little bit more focus, a little bit more serious about your whole damn life. If you get anything out of what I've said here today that there is a level you can go higher at, this is the level. The level is getting really damn serious about winning. In every area, winning in fun, winning in family. But you know what I'm talking about. Dialing that focus in a little more lasered to winning. That's the only thing that changed his life. He still isn't coordinated.

He just is a winner now. He flat wins. That's his identity. And so now he's going to go compete at a different level. So that's my story. Awesome. All right. Hope you guys enjoyed that speech.

And hope you enjoyed our interview with Ed Milet. I hope that you incorporate a lot of what he's talking about into 2021 to make it the best year you've ever had. Brandon and I are going to get out of here. And we will see you guys next week. This is David Green for Brandon, the halfway vegan Turner. Signing off. You're listening to Bigger Pockets Radio. simplifying real estate for investors large and small.

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