BiggerPockets Real Estate Podcast - 491: 5 Rules of Health & Wealth to Become the Millionaire with a Six Pack

Episode Date: August 1, 2021

Many of us have a story behind doing what we do. You may have been raised by parents living paycheck to paycheck, spurring you to chase financial freedom and create a better life. Or maybe you labored tirelessly at work to get a promotion or raise, simply to be passed up for someone else. For Adam Gilbert, founder of MyBodyTutor, his “why” is his father. Adam looked up to his father all his life but saw the pain and distress he was going through when he had a heart attack, a triple bypass surgery, and was later diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. This forged a path for Adam that materialized in the health and fitness space. Adam knew that he never wanted to be “too tired” to play with his kids, spend time with his family, or pursue a passion. As Adam has grown his business over the past decade and a half, he’s come away with many lessons that ring true for not only fitness enthusiasts but business owners as well. We talk through the five rules that Adam has put together for anyone to become healthy, wealthy, and mentally sound. While this is a mindset episode, you’ll be surprised with how many of these rules crossover almost perfectly into real estate investing. In This Episode We Cover: When to quit your full-time job and pursue your passions Choosing daily consistent action over large infrequent actions Why health is the ultimate productivity tool  Setting up “planned indulgences” and being strict, yet fair with yourself Choosing consistency over intensity and opting for small changes over time Doing what scares you until it doesn’t Accountability through partners, coaches, and friends And So Much More! Links from the Show BiggerPockets Forums BiggerPockets Calculators BiggerPockets Youtube Channel BiggerPockets Bookstore GoBundance OpenDoor Capital Brandon and David's Books Adam from My Body Tutor BiggerPockets Podcast 425: Focusing On Your $10,000/Hour Tasks (And How to Outsource the Rest!) with Benjamin Hardy Mybodytutor.com Special Deal for Listeners Click here to check the full show notes: https://www.biggerpockets.com/show491 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is the Bigger Pockets podcast show 491. So many people are obsessed with, you know, the latest computer, the latest gadgets, the latest software, the latest this. But you're the one who's running all this stuff. I always say health is the ultimate productivity tool. So when you upgrade yourself, you give yourself the capacity to handle everything better, right? You're a better version of yourself. You're listening to Bigger Pockets Radio.

Simplifying real estate for investors large and small. If you're here looking to learn about real estate investing without all the hype, you're in the right place. Stay tuned and be sure to join the millions of others who have benefited from biggerpockets.com. Your home for real estate investing online. What's going on about it's Brendan Turner, host of the Bigger Pockets podcast here with my co-host, Mr. David, getting ripped green. What's up, man? How you doing? That's funny. Getting ripped. Getting ripped. Dude, today's show.

It's all about getting ripped. In your business, in your life, in your relationships, in everything. How to get into better, sustainable, consistent excellence is really what this thing is about. And it is, I know I've said this before, and we record a lot of good shows, but this is one of my favorite episodes we have ever recorded. And I'm excited for you guys to hear this thing. It's a long one, but it's worth listening to every moment of it because this is going to impact every moment of your life. So more on that in a moment with our guest, Adam Gilbert. But first, let's get to today's quick tip.

Today's quick tip is plain and simple. I want you to start tracking something in your life that's important to you. Now, maybe you're trying to lose weight. Start tracking some calories. Put it into a calorie app or use like the company today we're talking about that Adam works for. It's founded. It's called My Body Tutor. Whether it's something like that or a fitness app or even a piece of paper, track that.

If it's real estate deals you want to close, start tracking your lead measures, things like number of offers sent, number of deals analyzed. If it's relationships or tracking your date nights, start checking the hours you spend with your kids. Track something because I want you to get into the practice of recognizing that it's not the big things in life that lead us to success. It's the daily consistent little things. And that's really today's show is all about. So that's today's quick. All right. Now, last thing before we jump at the interview, just something to be aware of that's happening in the near future is Ashley Care, host to

the Bigger Pockets Rookie Podcast. It's going to be hosting a group, kind of a group, I don't even call it coaching, but a group program together to make sure, for those who you are thinking about getting a real estate and you're just struggling getting started, a sort of, we'll call it a military boot camp, but for investors. So keep an eye out for that, more information to come on that. I just want to kind of tease that here, that there's something cool coming, and Ashley's amazing.

She's awesome. So I guess that's it. Before we're getting to jail, last thing, I will say this as a disclaimer. I don't know if I need to say this, but I'll say it anyway. The company that our guest today founded, which is called My Body Tutor, I actually was a paid, I mean, I am a paid member of that, I don't know, members, that the right word? I'm a customer, basically. I'm saying I'm a customer for years.

And then recently I kind of begged Adam to bring me on as an advisor. So I'm an advisor for the first time ever in another company, which is kind of cool, which means I can help advise. And so I'm an advisor in my body tutor. And that's not why I brought him on. I really have been wanting to do this for the last three years. And I just, I love everything he says. And I think you guys aren't love this too. It's life changing stuff.

So just with that said, I think it's time to get into today's interview with Adam Gilbert. Adam, welcome to the Bigger Pockets podcast, man. I am, you've upgraded how to buy properties. But did your insurance get the memo? When investors start scaling, insurance can't be an afterthought. Most policies were designed for a single property, not multiple rentals, LLC ownership, short-term stays, or properties mid-rehab. That's where blind spots can creep in. NREG works exclusively with real estate investors.

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Yeah, so let's get in this a little bit. So as I mentioned during the introduction, I'm a big fan of my body tutor. I have been for a long time. I actually, a buddy PT or Philip Taylor is the one that first introduced me to the concept because I saw him and I was like, the guy was like a different person, like literally like half the person he was. And I was like, actually, the very first time I ever surfed, it was with him. And I'm like, how did you, how did you get so in shape? And he's like, oh, yeah, my body tutor. So that's how this whole thing started. And so then, you know, I joined and I lost like 40 pounds and watched my business explode as well at the same time using the exact same kind of principles that you were teaching about fitness.

I applied it to business and real estate, which is crazy. So anyway, I'm pumped about this because I want everyone else to hear all the stuff that you you've shared over the years and we're going to boil it down to an interview. So anyway, with that said, yeah, yeah, I'm pumped. Let's start in the beginning. Before you were helping people, you know, get in shape and lose weight and improve their businesses and all that, what were you doing? So I actually worked for Ernst & Young for two years right out of college and I hated every

second of it. I was always into health and fitness though. I was always the go-to guy for health and fitness. And while I was working there, it was always the same story. You know, I'd give people diet and exercise plans. And then I'd see them a week or two later depending on client engagements and, you know, depending where I was. And it was always the same story.

It was always, you know, I love the plan you made up for me, but and it was I got caught with work, life, happy hours, kids, whatever it was. And I realized right then and there that, you know, it wasn't necessarily a lack of knowledge. That was the real issue. It was a lack of consistent action, lack of follow through. And that's where the idea for, you know, my body tutor came into play. And I quit my full-time job in January of 2007 and have been at this ever since.

That's crazy. How did that feel just quitting a job? I'm assuming you were making good income. You had a, you know, career that could have gone up and up for the next 40 years. But there you go and just jump into a complete entrepreneurial thing with no guaranteed success. What was your mindset during that time? Yeah, it was very terrifying. You know, I was two years out of college.

my mom thought I was absolutely nuts. She thought I was crazy. You know, I did not have her blessing. But, you know, it was ultimately my decision. You know, I was living in New York City, you know, and the only goal I had was I did not want to move home. Right. So I wanted to make it work. But it was very, very scary.

I mean, I vividly remember looking out the window in Times Square of the office and seeing like, you know, there's likely I'll never have this view again. And I was giving up, you know, comfort and security to change. my dream. Yeah. And that's something a lot of our listeners, you know, encounter as well. Like the parent who says, that's crazy, you shouldn't do it. The, you know, the dream of like, I want it. But like that, that fear that rises up that says, I don't, you know, I don't know if I can actually do this. Do you have any just, I mean, as an entrepreneur, before we get into fitness stuff, but as an entrepreneur, what advice do you have for people who are in that same spot right now going, oh, I hate my job. I hate every second of this. I want something different, but I'm afraid.

Yeah, well, I think if you're afraid first, it's helpful to identify what you're actually scared of. But it's also really helpful, I mean, you know, to work on your passion, at least on the side, right? Because it's amazing how if you work on your passion, even, you know, 20 to 45 minutes a day, I mean, doing something that makes you feel alive for 20 to 45 minutes a day can impact your entire life, right? So if you're really scared of giving up that financial security, which is totally understandable, then work on and on the side, but act as if you don't have your day job. because that day job can become a crutch, you know, and you want to get away from that. So I would say working on this side because, you know, even though I quit my full-time job without a security blanket or a safety blanket, you know, I knew that, you know, I had to make it work. And I, it was just also, I was only two years out of college, right? So I didn't have kids

back then. I didn't have to worry about that. And I was just so unhappy that, you know, it was, it made it easy. Yeah, that, well, that's a really good point. I mean, this is a application that applies to, I'm going to do a lot of, I'm sure, comparisons today between fitness and business. But the same thing applies. Like, yeah, you want to, like, in fitness, like, you can spend four hours a day at the gym. You can spend five hours a day at the gym if if you wanted to and you'd probably see some amazing results. But also, if you spent 30 minutes every day and you were just consistent with it and you were, you know, keeping healthy, like, you'd probably see even drastic results as well, right? I think we assume things take a lot more

time every day than they really do when it's the consistency that matters, huh? No, no question about it. I mean, if you do, you know, a few meaningful things each day, it can absolutely move the needle versus feeling like you have to, you know, run a marathon every time you work out or, you know, do a thousand things for your business. And, you know, another thing just to point out is in terms of any advice for people thinking about making a move is, you know, if you really don't feel like you can leave your job, like, again, it's understandable. It's hard to do your best work when you're worried about putting food on the table. So don't. Take that off the table, so to speak. And focus on, you know, working when you can. So this way you don't have to, you know, worry about

that those basic needs. That's such a good point. Yeah. So real estate investors, I teach them all the time like on a, I do a webinar like every week for bigger pockets. And I always say the same thing. Like, you could build a massive portfolio in like 15 minutes a day. Like if you were just consistent. If you were like the core things you have to do to build, I'm using real estate example. But there's like these core things, right? You have to analyze. You have to get leads coming in. You have to have some sorts of leads. So okay, get your real estate agent, set you up with leads. got automatic leads coming into your inbox. Great. Or you're sending direct mail marketing or you're doing cold call it. Whatever. You spend it like set up a system. Now you got things coming in. And then every

day, if you just analyzed one deal a day, if that's all you did is analyze one deal and it takes five minutes, 10 minutes. And then once a week you threw an offer on one of those five. Like you throw in 10 offers on a property, you'll probably lend one of them. So in other words, if you just were consistent with that, you're not working any more than 10 minutes a day. Maybe once a week you spend 30 minutes writing up an offer on a property. But, you know, 10 weeks later, you got yourself a property. Like, on average, doesn't guarantee you'll get one. But it's that, it's like, but what do people spend their time doing, right? Like business cards and meetings and planning and reading and podcast. And there's nothing wrong with any of that. But it's like going to the gym and then standing around for four hours saying,

I don't really have time for the gym. I can't do four hours a day. So I better just not do any of it. Right. They're focusing on the fun slash comfortable stuff, right? And as we know, it's the uncomfortable stuff that typically moves a needle at first at least. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, that's so good. It reminds me there's a, there's this great, you mentioned a minute ago about how like the people at the, at your work, work, you could write them up the exact plan and food, diet,

fitness plan and they just don't make a change. And I know for my life that's happened many times. Like I know, everybody here knows how to lose weight, right? That's not a secret. It's not like, how do you, how do you lose weight? It's also not a secret to, to build a business or to invest in real estate. Like the secrets are are not non-existent, right? Like it's the fundamentals.

This is a great quote from, what's the name? Derek Sivers, Derek Sivers, who wrote a few good books and he's been a TED Talk guy. But he says, if more information was the answer, we would all be billionaires with six-pack abs. And I've always loved that. It's one of my favorite quotes of all time. Like, yeah, we all know how to get abs. A hundred percent. And, you know, even when I started this, you know, 14 years ago, my thesis was that a lack of knowledge is not the real issue.

It's a lack of consistent action. And the real question is, why can we be consistent? And that's what I've dedicated my life to is answering that question. Yeah. Dude, and this is why like every time we talk together, I'm always just like same. I always like same, same, same. Because it's like the same exact principles that go into this like that.

It's like if people could just be consistent with their business goals and they were doing the things that mattered the most in business, like they would achieve the massive success that they want. But they don't for a lot of reasons. So I thought maybe like, do you have any like tips or. rules or ideas like like what are these principles that you you teach that maybe are crossover principles like that apply to both you know business and on a health standpoint because I want people listening to the show I want them thinking okay I want to lose some weight because most people feel like they want

to get better in shape and but I also want them thinking I want to improve my business so I don't know we'll call them crossover principles what do you have any of those I love it yes I have five five that I think will be super helpful to everyone. Perfect yeah absolutely all right so I mean the first thing no question is you have to have a compelling vision, right? And you have to see how your life will be better, whether it's with business or fitness, right? I think you recently had a post, which I loved. It was a pie chart. And it was reasons why I want to be financially independent. And every part of it was family, right? And for me, for my health, it's family as well, right? For me, you know, I grew up, you know, my father had a heart attack.

Then shortly after he was, he had a triple bypass and he was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. And then seeing him deteriorate mentally and physically throughout the years until he passed away was extremely hard. And that's one of the reasons why I'm so passionate about health and fitness because I learned firsthand that health is true wealth. And it was awful to see him, you know, deteriorate through the years. So for me, health is so much about, you know, my family and my kids and being there. there and being energized for them and being around for them. That's, you know, I think when you have a compelling vision, it's a game changer. What do you think? I'm 100% on. Yeah, I mean, I have the whole like, I talk about a lot, but I have like the vivid vision on my wall. It's like a newspaper

article written three years in the future where I'm just like this is, this is where my company's headed. And as soon as I wrote that, like that was a three year goal. We accomplished it in a year, maybe a year and a half. We accomplished almost everything on the list. And now I'm working on my new like seven year vision. I'm going to do a seven year one this time, trying to buy a billion as a real estate. And it's like once you have that vision now like it excites me every time I look at it. And that's why I have it hung on my wall four feet high. Like it's a big like poster now. It just gets me excited about where I'm headed. And it's not just like I want to be in shape. Like that's not the vision necessarily in shape. It's asking that deeper question. Why?

Why does that matter? And I think that's the compelling vision you're getting at, isn't it? Like, why do you want this thing? Yeah. Why do you want it? Because here's the thing. As we know, any worthwhile goal is going to have ups and downs. There's going to be challenges, right? And as I often say, we either realize their goals or we rationalize them away. And we typically do that when it gets uncomfortable, when it gets hard. But if you have a compelling vision and if you really understand why life will be better, why this is so important, then it will be a lot easier to stick with it when the going gets tough. Yeah. Yeah, dude. There are so many studies, too, that are out there that's just show like like like I mean obviously if you spend your whole entire life smoking and

eating fats and you know carbs and like I mean just like the bad the bad piece of those and all you do is just eat twinkies and nachos and like you're going to die earlier so it's like what's it like if you knew you're going to die at 45 and somebody was like hey for $1,000 I'll let you live till 46 like everyone would be like oh yeah for sure yeah I'll pay that money right or for $10,000 I bet people would pay that money they'd figure out a way right but that's what I'm like fitness like in eating right does right it gives you like extra life and there's so many studies that back that up yet people still don't do it um but yeah for me that compelling vision like i want to be there for my kids for my grandkids to watch them go old and not be like my grandparents when they

hit like 55 they were too old to do anything like they were they were just like in a wheelchair and then they were in a nursing home at like 65 and then they passed away around in their in their 70s and i'm like man i want to i don't know i see other people in there now like older people and they're like 80s and 90s that are still like active and running around. And I'm like, I want to be that person. That sounds pretty good. Yeah, that's the goal. I mean, you know, 100% and, you know, I'm sure you have a ton of workaholics, you know,

watching and listening to this. And, you know, it's like, well, I don't want to take time away from my business, right? And my counter to that is, and you've certainly experienced this. And I think it's one of the reasons why you're so passionate about fitness now is when you improve your fitness, it improves your energy. it improves your clarity, it improves your productivity. So so many people are obsessed with, you know, the latest computer, the latest gadgets, the latest software, the latest this.

But you're the one who's running all this stuff. And I always say health is the ultimate productivity tool, right? Health is the ultimate productivity tool. So when you upgrade yourself, you give yourself the capacity to handle everything better, right? You're a better version of yourself. And, you know, when you take a little you time, it actually creates more you time because you're not as tired, you're not as athargic, and you're way more focused and productive. So that's interesting. I like that you're, you're looking at the compelling vision,

which we're talking about right now. Like the end of life vision is important. But a lot of people are also saying, well, you know, whatever, I don't care about the end of my life. I want to enjoy life now. But what you're saying is like by having the right, like the body right now, you are improving now. It's just like real estate. Right. Like the end of your life, yeah, I want to, it'd be great to be a millionaire, multi-millionaire when I'm 65, 70, 80 years old. But, but the great thing about real estate, what we all like about it is that you get to enjoy life more now too, because you got five, 10, 15, $20,000 a month coming in and passive income. Well, now you get to travel more, spend time with your kids now, do more activities like skiing and snowboarding and biking because you have the money to be able to not work so hard. So the principles, again, are like the exact same is it's not just compelling vision about the future.

It's compelling vision about today and how you want to feel and how you want to. want to live, right? Yes. Life, of course, will be better in the future, but it's going to be way better currently as well. It's going to be way better than now. And that's, of course, that's the real reward because obviously it's, all we have is now, right? So that's where it's at. Yeah, that's awesome, man.

All right. So the first thing, compelling vision, do you think people should, like, is this a point where they should say, no, this is the body type I want? Is that how you approach things like they, I want a six pack? I want to weigh 181 pounds. I want to have this size bicep. or is there another way of looking at kind of a vision for what you want to look like? Well, everyone has a different vision, right?

So I can't say what, you know, what everyone should have. If having a six-pack or having bigger biceps is what motivates you and that's part of your vision, you know, how you look, that's great. And, you know, we can certainly help you achieve that. If your vision is, I don't, you know, personally my rule is whenever my kids say, Daddy, I want to play, I will never ever say no. And I will never say I'm tired. Those are like two lifelong goal. Like I will never say I'm tired to my kids. I refuse because I grew up with a father even before he was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis.

He was always tired. Right. And it was tough. And sadly, I don't have all that many memories playing with him. So that is so important to me. Right. So for me, it's about how I feel the energy. But for some people, it's how they want to look.

And there's nothing wrong with that. But you have to choose something that truly excites you because there's going to be times like any worthwhile journey, whether it's fitness, real estate, whatever. where it gets hard. So if your vision is not compelling, then you're going to give up easily. Yeah, that's so good. That's super convicting too,

because there have been many times where I've said to my kids, I'm too tired. But in reality, it's usually I would rather play on my phone. And that's even worse, right? Like, not only am I too being too lazy. I'm lazy because I just want to play my phone.

So, yeah, I'm going to make that role in my life right now as well. Never going to say I'm too tired to my kids ever. Because, yeah, I don't want that the memory of them is, I remember dad was always on his phone or dad was always too busy working or dad was always this to play. Like, yeah, super convicting man. Well, let me ask you this. Maybe this point will come up later on the conversation. I don't know, but I think it's a good place to throw it in.

You know, you might have, some people might be like, well, what I want is I want that great godded body, right? A red goddess body that's like, you know, chiseled and blood. Some people might be seen that. There's that book by Mark Mason, is it? Like the subtle art of not given an F. That book, he says something really. really impactful to me. He said like,

rather than setting a goal for what you want to look like, be like, have, or at least before setting that goal, ask yourself, are you willing to do the pain,

to love the pain? I think it's what he says, love the pain needed to get there. In other words, I do not have it. I've been doing my body tutor now for what, three,

four years, something like that. Like, I lost to 40 pounds. I've kept it off. I've got a lot stronger now. But I don't have a six pack, a chisel six pack, because honestly,

I'm not willing to like do that pain, right? Like, I like eating dessert. I like having a drink occasion. I like doing all those things. So it's just interesting. Like, again, when you, I think it's when you're writing that compelling vision of yourself or thinking about what it fires you up to think through what am I willing to do to get that?

Because there are consequences to every goal that we set in there. Absolutely. I mean, listen, there's the pain. There is pain. There is sacrifice. But I always say a sacrifice, you know, is giving up something of lesser value today for something of greater value tomorrow. But for you, for me as well, like I refuse to give up certain things, right?

I'm never going to say no when my kids want ice cream or, you know, going to turn down the slice of pizza. Like, you know, and to your specific point, like, yes, in order to have a six-pack to get below sub to 10% body fat, it takes a lot of saying no. Yeah. You know, so you definitely have to choose what discomfort you're willing to embrace. Absolutely. Well, this is maybe that maybe a good time to bring up the idea of planned indulgences. This is one of my favorite things in all.

all of my body tutor that I learned from you is this idea of, well, I'll let you explain it. Why are you not saying no, you know, no ice cream, no tacos, you know, why is that not the plan? Yeah, well, first off, I'm obsessed with sustainability, right? So I want to help people lose weight, help people get in great shape, but most importantly, stay there. And if you're never able to have your favorite food, that's not sustainable, nor is that desirable, right? So our mantra is we want, or our philosophies, we want our clients to be fit and happy.

not fit and miserable. And, you know, it's so important because if you don't like your life as you're losing weight, if you don't like your life as you're pursuing your business goals, then you're never going to be able to stick with it. Right. And the goal is sustainability. The goal isn't to do everything you can for a year to try to build a business and then burn out.

The goal isn't to do everything you can for a year to try to get, you know, improve your health and improve your physique or whatever and then give up, right? It's to be able to sustain it, right? It's like brushing your teeth. How long are you going to keep brushing your teeth for for the rest of your life, hopefully till the day you die. Right. So it's the same thing here. The fit and happy concept is really important. And it's also, as I was saying, I never want to be the guy when, you know, my kids say, hey, let's go for ice cream. Let's have a slice of pizza. And I say no, right? That's part of being

present. That's part of being with them. However, there's also a lot of routine meals, a lot of routine days, where there's nothing special, right? It's just a routine meal, right? And my definition is special is, you know, it's worthwhile. And worthwhile to me is, well, I remember this in at least two weeks time. Yes. So, you know, so often, you know, so often we eat the chips, the cookies, whatever it might be. We don't even remember that the following day because it's not special, right? Instead, I'd rather save it for homemade cookies or, you know, an amazing restaurant or whatever it might be. That's the goal. That's what we're after. That concept changed my life. I mean, like, literally changed my life because, like, there were so many times where, yeah, I just would grab

candy because it was on the counter, right? My kids got this bucket of candy for left over from Halloween, right? So I just grab it. I don't remember that five minutes later. It feels really good in the moment. And then, you know, 10 minutes later, I feel horrible and I'm tired. And, you know, like, that's the funny thing about sugar, right? Everyone thinks sugar gives you energy and power, like, you know, gets you hyper, but in reality just, like, slows you down. And, yeah, I don't remember that at all. But now, like, I, it almost makes, like, those, I'll give you an example. A real example. The other night, actually, was a yes? Yeah, two nights ago, there was my buddy Josh Dorkin who founded bigger pockets. He lives in Maui now. And one of Josh's relatives, who lives here

as well, had a birthday party, like a 75th birthday party. So we did this fancy Kyav. It's called Kiavi outdoor, one of my buddies runs this outdoor fine dining experience. We did this outdoor dinner, under the stars. Like, it was amazing evening, right? Of hanging out with good people. And it was such a, it was a powerful night, right? So I knew that was coming. And I was excited for it. And I had no guilt about eating the pineapple upside down cake that was made at that event, because I still remember it now. And it was a powerful night. And I was excited for it. And I was, Every bit about that evening was right. But the rest of that day and the day before it and the day before it, because I knew that

was coming. It was like, I wasn't starving myself, but it was like, well, I could eat this candy bar right now, but I'm not going to remember that. But you know, I'm going to remember is that pineapple. I want to make that worth it. I want to make it memorable. So anyway, super grateful for that whole concept because it just changed my life. Yeah, it's a really powerful limit test.

It's like it makes it easy to make decisions, right? It's like, is this worthwhile or not? And I think it comes down to the second rule kind of, of, you know, how this all applies of fitness and business is, is this the right path, right? And is what you're trying to follow through with, is it doable? Is it sustainable? Is it realistic? Because if it's not, you're setting yourself off for failure, right? So let's say your listeners, you know, who are pursuing real estate and all that in business, is what you're trying to do sustainable, right? Or is it something that you're going to burn out? Right. I always use the analogy if you're driving from New York to California.

it's way more effective to go 80 miles an hour consistently versus 100 miles an hour only to burn out, right? Because you know, you're just going to burn out. So give yourself a chance to succeed and come up with a plan that's actually realistic and doable, whether it's for fitness or business. Yeah, this is why, you know, I've done a ton of these like over the years. I'm going to have about like 20 years of like the, you know, 90 day extreme fitness, you know, home video, DVD set or or the, you know, I'm going to go seven. 75 days of just like eating nothing and working out twice a day. And I like those. I'm curious

of your thoughts on those things. But based on what you're saying here, like, I've never, I've never been like after those challenges, after whatever does I do for like the 90 days, 75 days, I always gain back whatever I lost there. It works in the moment, but I always gain it back. So what are your thoughts on those like different challenges that are out there? Yeah, I mean, they're all willpower based, right? They're all willpower based. And, you know, it's important, you know, as you know, if nothing's changing between your ears, then it's a short-term thing, right? And the test I always use is, can I see myself eating this way in five years, right? Or can I see myself working like this in five years or 10 years or whatever? But the whole idea is it has to be

sustainable. So whether it's any of these short-term, you know, challenges or diet challenges, if you don't see yourself eating like that, you know, in five, 10 years, then you're setting yourself up to burnout. And the same way with the way you work. If the way you're working every day is burning you out. If you're left exhausted and you just feel like you're hanging on by the skin of your teeth, you're not going to last. And as you know, this is a long-term game. You know, you can't burn out. You've got to give yourself a chance to show up every day for as long as possible. Yeah, I love it. I love that. Yeah, there's so many connections here to real estate and to business and to fitness again. It's this crossover principles. So yeah, willpower based. I like, I wrote that

phrase down here. I always take notes when I'm talking to people, but I really like willpower, like those are willpower based. And there's so many things in life where we're just trying to push through and I can do this and I can I can be strong enough. Why is willpower so, I'll say weak, like to use some alliteration there. Why is willpower so terrible in weak sometimes? Well, listen, the perfect example is every gym is, you know, crowded in January and empty by early February, right? So we're all starting out eager and raring to go, but then life kicks in, right? So whenever you're using willpower, it just doesn't last, right? It's way more effective to use your limited self-control, and we all have limited self-control, to use your limited willpower

to create environments where you don't need self-control, right? So use your limited self-control to create environments where you don't need self-control. And it's the same thing with willpower. If you're using willpower to accomplish a goal, that's not going to last. It has to feel doable. It has to feel practical. That's really good. Yeah, we had Benjamin Hardy, who wrote a book called Willpower Doesn't Work on the show back, I don't know, six months ago now, maybe longer. And he basically says the exact same thing. Like use your environment. Like when you alter your environment, everything else becomes easier. Like if you're, yeah, if you're, even to the point of like, I'll like when I'm running early, when I know I'm going to go running early in the

morning, I set my shoes and my clothes out right by my bed. Right. Because now I don't have to make that choice. It's just sitting there. So my environment made my will, it made it much less of a will power issue as it was just like, okay, well, I'm going to put on my clothes or just sitting there. So yeah, environment definitely plays a huge piece in changing behavior. and all that. And yeah, that's really good, man. Really good. All right. What else you got on that? We got any more on on rule number two or should we move on to rule number three? Yeah, I mean, I guess, you know, putting yourself on the right path, I mean, just to kind of reiterate, it has to feel sustainable. It has to feel realistic. So, you know, whatever you're doing, whether it's

with fitness or business, ask yourself, can I live like this, you know, for the next five years, for the next 10 years, right? So if staying up until 3 a.m. every morning, you know, or every night and working on your side hustle. If that's not doable, then you got to scale it back a little bit. Yeah, yeah, really good. I tend to get these moments where, like, I'll think, like, for example, like, I'll go a little bit more relaxed right on my diet and gain a little bit of weight. And I'll suddenly just be like, you know what, I'm going to get back on this bandwagon.

I'm going to go 30 days with no sugar, right? Starting right now, I'm going to go 30 days no sugar. And every time I do that, I go, wait, whoa, wait. Like, remember what Adam said? stick to the program. Like, like, that's, it's not going to be sustainable. I will do it. I will, I will power through 30 days of whatever of eating this or that or not eating this or that.

And then I just remember, like, I remind myself, like, am I going to do this five years from now? Can I maintain this? Let me give you another business analogy of this. So there's a, there's a program, and I have a program, it's wrong word, like an operating system called EOS, right? I've probably talked to you about it before Adam. But it's from the book, Traction, which is ironically sitting on my desk right now. So the whole idea of EOS is saying, look, you have, most people set goals in January of like, I'm going to build my business to $5 million this year.

I'm going to buy 10 rental properties this year. And then they write that down maybe. Most don't even do that. And then nothing happens, right? Just like they sign up for the gym and then they lose out by February. What traction did for my company and for my business and for many other entrepreneurs is it took that, okay, fine, that might be your goal. Let's break that into a sustainable week by week.

week month by month, quarter by quarter plan, that there's no end to it. It's not a goal. It's like literally, this is how you operate your life. And so it's like, it's almost like my body tutor is the EOS or the traction of the body, right? Like, it's got like maybe a crappy analogy, but I like thinking that way. It's like, this is just how we operate my business, it's doing EOS. This is how we meet. This is when we meet. This is how we set goals. And we're going to do this forever. Like for, I mean, we've seen such dramatic increases in open door capital because of, using this model. And it doesn't have to be traction or EOS.

It could be something else. But having a system that you can just do forever works, just like with fitness or diets. That's the problem with diets is that they're, it's like, I'm going to make 10 cold calls every day in my business for this month. Okay, great. But at the end of that, do you have a consistent lead source coming in for your properties?

No. Well, that's the problem. It's inherently short term. All right. So this is amazing so far. And I know we got a lot more to talk about. So let me just give a recap. You said you had five rules.

The first one you said was create a compelling vision. Second one was put yourself on the right path. What about number three? What do you got for a rule or a crossover principle for that? I know you're going to love this one. It's take daily consistent action. Because listen, consistency, it's right. Keep through your heart, right?

Yeah. Daily consistent action is the key to success. And if you take it choice by choice day by day, task by task, then you're eventually going to get to where you want to be. do you find Adam that that becomes one of the hardest parts for people is I guess in my life I always notice that I tend to gravitate towards intensity over consistency. Sometimes I miss a couple days or a couple weeks or a couple months or whatever and I'm mad at myself. So then I just go throw everything I have into what that thing is. And the next like week after working out like that,

I can't do anything. So you're just laying in bed the whole time or you're eating bad food to try to make yourself feel better because you wear yourself out. I do that with a lot. lots of things in life. Is that a consistent pattern you've seen with a lot of the people that you help? Oh, totally. I mean, there's a lot of things to unpack there. So, I mean, number one, you know, the intensity over consistency. I'm much more in the school of consistency over intensity. You know, the goal is to show up every day, day in and day out week after week, right? And as long as you're doing that, then you're going to be consistent. And you, if you're burning yourself out, you know, so for example, I've, you know, I've had friends and clients where they start out,

they want to work out two hours, three hours a day, right? They start out. doing that. And then, you know, they can't go to the gym for the next week or two, right? It's much more effective to start slow and build up, build momentum. And in terms of what you said, in terms of like, you know, using food, we can certainly go down that rabbit hole. You know, so much, you know, what we do is help our clients change your relationship with food and how they use food. But yeah, that's a big part of what we focus on. You know, one thing that when I started working with you guys at my body tutor, that I guess like kind of changed the whole. a lot of how I thought about food and that relationship with it was I, like every day, I would

have a bowl of ice cream before going to bed. Every single day I'd have ice cream before going to bed. And we kind of talked about this earlier about this idea of like saving up your indulgences or like, you know, planning them and not just having a thing. But ice cream was just an everyday thing. And when I think back to it, like my dad, still to this day, my dad has a bowl of ice cream every single night. And when I'm talking bowl, I mean like a mixing bowl, right, of ice cream every single night. And my family growing up, we'd buy the five, quart pails of the Kemp's ice cream and we'd buy two of those, three of those a week because this is what you do.

And so what I had this relationship with food where like I just had it every night. And I remember Matt, who's my specific, you know, body tutor, you know, like my specific coach. And he asked me the question like early on. He said, why do you feel the need to have dessert every night? And I was like, that's, that's just what everybody does. Like, that's just what people do, right? And it was like, it was just that question asking that.

I had never even thought that that was not a normal thing. And maybe that's probably is a normal thing, which is why majority of Americans overweight. But it was such a hard thing for me, like emotionally to pull that away, to not have dessert every single night. And I was angry. Like what I'm like, I'm like, screw you. Like I want my dessert. I mean, I deserve it, right? I worked hard today.

I had a good, hard day. I accomplished a lot. So I need to make myself feel better before night because I wanted this ice cream. But as soon as I recognize that pattern, it started to change. And now today, like, I mean, I don't even think about dessert before that. I mean, once in a while, I have dessert. Again, if it's a special thing. And sometimes I cheat there and I, you know, we'll have dessert.

But it's not an, it's not an expected thing. So I don't really know how that fits in here, but I just thought I'd like, that made a big impact on me as well. Yeah. I mean, listen, so much of our behavior is ingrained, right? We don't think twice it's from growing up. It's, you know, our parents. It's, you know, whether it's with money, whether it's food, right? Our, you know, for, you have a scarcity mindset, an abundance mindset, that's ingrained in us.

And for you growing up, having dessert was part of life. And now, as you know, you're older, you have a ton of responsibility. You have a lot of things on your plate. You know, no pun intended. You know, you're actually pun intended. You know, using ice cream is how you rewarded yourself, right? At the end of the day. And one of the things we work on is, well, how else can you reward yourself?

And listen, there's nothing wrong with having dessert every night. But it goes back. to this idea of negotiables versus non-negotiables. And if you were unwilling to change that, then we would work on the things you were willing to change. And that's really important. Yeah. That's really good, man.

Yeah. And it reminds me of the consistency thing, how that works both ways, doesn't it? It's kind of like the compound effect. You ever read that book, The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy? It's one of my all-time favorite books.

And he says in there, like, look, he gives a story of like two people. And one of them just starts making little tiny changes in their life. Like they cut out one dessert a day or, you know, they cut out a latte. Not about, you know, saving money, but about like a little bit less, you know, that. And they start working out just a little bit more. And then they start reading like just five more pages in a personal development or business book.

And the other person just starts eating just an extra handful of M&Ms at the office. Just like one extra handful. Doesn't do anything, right? And a little bit like, and they do it every single day. And he basically makes this point that in the beginning, those two lines of that person's life look pretty identical. There's two people identical situations. But over time, that consistency on a positive side and on a negative side result in drastically different person down the road.

I mean, like 50, 60 pound difference, health issue difference, like the relationship, everything about their life. Their business is more difficult because that compound effect or that consistency over time works both ways. And so what I like about working, you know, what I've learned from you is just this idea of like just create a few more of those positive habits in your life. and stick with them and maybe try to pull back a couple of the more difficult ones. It's not about radical change.

It's about consistent change. Yeah, I mean, what you're kind of describing also, you know, it's kind of like this idea of the state of inertia versus the state of momentum, right? And when you're in a state of inertia, it's really, really hard to get started. And, you know, you just keep going down this other way. And when you're in a state of momentum, when you make small little changes, it builds and builds and builds, right? I mean, think about how you started your businesses.

you didn't get to where you didn't start where you are now. You started with a few decisions and slowly but sure you built it up. So, you know, the state of inertia versus state of momentum, I mean, you can go in two different ways, right? And my suggestion for those who feel like they're in a state of inertia where they just are stuck, you know, taking that extra handful, whatever it might be or they can't do something differently with work, start small. Don't let the idea of small actions get in the way of consistency because so often we feel like

if we can't be perfect or if we can't do it all, whatever that means, you know, we do nothing. And, you know, I always say all or nothing leads to nothing. So we're much better off with an always something mindset, always something versus all or nothing. Yeah. So I've noticed one thing, Adam, with my own. Well, two things that led to me as of late getting a little bit better shape. The first was COVID because it actually forced me to be home. And as soon as I was home as when everyone else was gaining weight, I actually started losing weight.

because I was eating food at home. What I was doing before is I was a real estate agent and I was jetting around from appointment to appointment. And I was eating around the other big rocks that were in my life, which always meant some form of fast food or gas station or something in between appointments. That was a habit I picked up when I was a police officer working 20 hour days. And it just kind of kept going. So I sort of interrupted that pattern when I had to stay home.

And then I realized, oh, this is actually easier than I thought. If the good food is there, I will eat it. I default to the bad. So that's the first point I wanted to. make. And the second one was, because I was bored at home, I started exercising more. I didn't have anything else to do. And I feel like that actually contributed to helping break that pattern of eating a handful of M&Ms here or a candy bar there or chips, whatever it was. The exercise made me not want to eat. And my whole life I spent thinking exercise makes you lose

weight. And so if you exercise, you can eat like crap and you'll be fine. And I found that actually isn't the truth. Like it seemed like exercise was ounces and your diet is pounds. So, The diet has to be right, but exercise makes the diet easier. So those were two things I found that help for me. Is that a one-off? Am I different? Or are a lot of people sort of in that same boat? No, I mean, that's very, very common.

So there's no question. Exercise is a keystone habit. You know, when you exercise, you typically feel good. And when you feel good, you're likely to make choices that continue to make you feel good. On the flip side, though, there is also this for people where they exercise and then what's known as moral licensing, they feel like because they exercise, they're entitled to eat indulgence, eat indulgently or do something else.

But for many people, once they start exercising, it helps them improve other behaviors. And then, you know, now that you've been home, clearly, you've realized the power of, you know, making it easy to do what you really want to do and making it hard to do what you don't want to do, right? So when you're home and there's healthy foods available, it's much easier to do what you really want to do. And if you don't have tempting foods around, of course, it's much harder to do what you don't want to do.

So the reason I'm bringing this up is I'm thinking there's other people that are probably in a similar situation where I'm going to be having inertia in one direction or another. I'm probably not just ever going to be sitting still. If I start my day off with a run or going to the gym or even a walk or something, just some form of movement, I get varying degrees of like dopamine or whatever it is that hit me that make me feel good. That good you get after you worked out. I don't know how to describe it.

People say, you just feel good all day, that thing. The thought of fast food in that state is gross. It's like you're going to kill that buzz that you just got. and you don't want it. And then you notice the minute you eat something bad, there's like an emotional feeling of, oh, it smashes me. And I go down for me in a good mood. And I notice that I get tired. I used to never notice that you're just always tired. And then I don't want to eat the bad food is what I'm getting at. It is easier to say no and make that decision that can be very difficult otherwise. If I don't work out, I'm sort of like on this balance beam. And it's very easy.

Like I walk in the office and someone has muffins or bagels or something. You eat one of them and you get boom smashed and then you feel kind of good because you just eat junk food. And then in a couple hours, I go do it again. I don't know what it is, but I go back to that same thing. And then I can't get out of that cycle. And I spend like the rest of the day, even if I do try to work out, I'm heavy. I got all the stuff in my stomach.

I don't really feel like doing it. I'm not excited about it. I'm pushing myself through. So for me, it's that very, very first. first choice. Like that if I start in one direction when I wake up, there's like a 90% chance I'm going to stay in that direction. Is that a consistent pattern you've seen? Yeah. I mean, you're clearly an all or nothing person where, you know, when you start the day, when you knock over that first pin in the morning, it helps you knock over all the other things. Right. I always say we all have,

you know, we're all juggling, you know, three to five critical balls throughout the day, right? And, you know, for me, my critical balls are eating well, exercising, sleeping, writing, and spending quality time in my family. So if I do those things, it enables me to do everything else. And if I don't do those things, if one of those things drops, everything else that I want to do and have to do doesn't get done. So I structure my day around those five things because it has such a huge impact on everything else. So for you, you know, I think we should all embrace our nature. It doesn't mean we can't try to change it. But for you, you're an all or nothing type person. I would structure my day like no matter what I'm going to do something first thing in the morning.

Now the challenge for you might be you might feel like, well, if I can't go for a run, then I won't do anything. And my challenge to you would be instead of all or nothing, always something. Right. So let's say you're just really dreading running in the morning. I would say, you know what, go for a 10 minute walk or go for a five minute walk or do something, always something instead of all or nothing. That's really good.

Brandon, can you make a t-shirt out of that? all or something that's that's actually not a bad shirt idea instead of all or nothing always something yes yeah that's going back to that that principle of consistency that you're talking about and as after we said it my mind started thinking about all the ways that applies so like brandon and i just started jujitsu and whenever i go to hawaii we roll and he has a consistent coach that shows up like twice a week at his house and i don't i inconsistently just plug it in whenever i can so every time i show up there knowing that I'm going to be rolling with him and Tarrell, I know they got ahead of me. And my brain starts thinking, dude, they're going to be better than you.

You got to work harder. You have to be more intense to overcome your lack of consistency. And then I get there and I burn myself out in the first two minutes and they just destroy me for the rest of the time because that intensity was a poor substitute for the consistency for the consistency. For the consistency that I really need. And I'm seeing how probably many ways, if I'm inconsistent and I try to make up for it with intensity, it actually slows me down and it makes it harder to be consistent. Instead, I should be thinking, okay, they're going to be better than me. They're going to beat you. How can you get something on your calendar so that the next time you come back, you have

been training four times a week instead of two? Exactly right. Set yourself up to show up, you know, on a consistent basis. And again, if you're, you know, if you're pushing yourself too much, you're going to burn out, you know, into your earlier point, yeah, you know, no doubt, as we like to say, diet is the key to weight loss and exercise is the key to stress relief, energy, in a better mood. And, you know, just going back to you, it should be a,

in non-negotiable, every single morning you wake up, you're going to do something. That's the key. Hey, on that note then, maybe it's a good time to ask this question. Is it better for people who are like right now, they are not dieting well, they're not exercising well, maybe neither one? What is more important do you think? Is it getting their diet in correct first and then adding the workouts? Or is it, is it, if you had to choose one or the other, what do you think is more vital

right now? No doubt diet is most important. It's 80%. It's 80% of, you know, diet is it's about what, why and how we eat. And as you know, we focus way more just on what we eat. It's about how and why we eat. So diet is the key to weight loss. Exercise, again, is the key to energy, stress relief, and a better mood.

So if you're looking to change your body and lose weight, diet is definitely going to get you, you know, much greater results. There are two kinds of real estate investors, those who have reviewed their insurance and those who think that they have. Most don't realize their coverage wasn't built for how they actually invest. Vacancy periods, rehabs, short-term, rentals or LLC held properties. These gaps surface only when filing claims.

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If you own a rental property, don't assume you're covered. Have NREG review your insurance with someone who gets investing at NREG.com slash BPPod. That's N-R-E-I-G.com slash B-Podd. You know, this maybe is another way I can relate this back to real estate as well, but applies to all areas of life, is I think about when new investors come to me and they say, I can't find any real estate deals. I mean, everyone who listens to this show out of it,

You've heard me say this before. People go, I can't find any real estate deals. What do I always ask? How many offers did you make last week? And then they're always like, none, right? Okay, well, how many deals that you analyze? How many numbers did you, how many properties did you find out exactly how much you should offer on it? And usually it's zero or maybe one or two.

I'm like, okay, well, how many leads did you get? How many, like, people calling you saying, I want to sell my house did you get? Usually none, maybe a couple came from a real estate agent, whatever that thing is. And so I always say, like, look, we can work backwards and diagnose exactly what the problem. is here because the results like success should not be a surprise like nobody ever woke up going whoa i got like 50 million dollars in real estate today like that's not a thing um nobody got became a billionaire was shocked to become a billionaire nobody came a millionaire was probably shocked except for a few lottery winners and nobody got a six pack or lost 20 pounds surprised right like there are actions that we

take consistently that should give the results so i was like to say like like success shouldn't be a surprise. That's kind of like another t-shirt that I want to make someday. Like success should not be a surprise. It should just be the natural result. In fact, you should be surprised not to get success based on what you did. But the key there, and it's relates back to what we talked about a long time ago earlier, or, you know, this is a long interview. So earlier on this show, where people spend a lot of time doing the wrong things, right? For example, they're eating every day. They're eating crap and like they're, you know, they're having a Starbucks latte with like, you know, 450 calories in it and 80 grams of sugar.

And they're doing that twice a day. And then they're adding this. And these little things that add up throughout the day. And yeah, they're going to the gym, but they can't figure out why they're not losing the weight or they're, you know, whatever. And so it's like a real estate person saying, oh, yeah, I mean, I've been investing. I've been looking at deals on realtor.com or on Zillow all week. Well, yeah, but that's not going to get you there.

So what can you speak to that in terms of like the right consistent action? Like, what is the right consistent action to do? Well, I think it's really important to start with an objective, right? So what are you trying to get closer to? And if you don't have a clear objective, right? If you don't have a clear defined vision, then you have no idea if you're going the right direction. So whether if it's business, you have a clear objective and you know where you want to go.

If it's fitness, you know, you have your clear objective and you know where you want to go. So you have to understand and you have to measure if you're moving closer or further away or if you're just staying the same. So to me, I think it starts with having a clear objective. Yeah, that's awesome, man. I love that. Anything else on this rule number three before we move on to rule number four? I think that's, I think that's it.

All right. So what is rule number four? So rule number four is do what scares you until it doesn't. And one of my kind of personal philosophies and something we try to teach our clients is discomfort is our compass. Right. And what I mean by that is if you do what you've always done, it's going to feel comfortable. Right. If you do what you've always done, it's going to feel comfortable by nature.

Right. And if you do something differently, it's going to feel uncomfortable by nature. right and the key thing to remember is what's easy now was once hard and what's hard now will soon be easy but if you let discomfort be your compass then you'll eventually get to where you want to be as we know discomfort is often you know the separating is the barrier between where we are now and where we want to go that's so good that's another t-shirt right or other's on t-shirt discomfort is our compass we're going to have so many t-shirts after this it's going to be great that relates so much back to what I said earlier about the ice cream every night.

It was so, it was so much discomfort for me to say, I'm not going to have dessert every single night. I'm not going to reward myself that way. But now that's totally normal. But it was, it was discomfort, but it told me that was the right path I should go on

because it was the harder one. It was the one that I had to make a harder choice on. So, yeah, discomfort is the compass. David, question for you then. For a real estate investor,

what do you see is what are those discomfort things that you see? that are actually good that people should be using and moving toward. Like what are things that, like habits that stop people from being successful? Yeah, more like what are the habits that are hard that they should be doing, but they're not because or the things that they should be doing that are hard. I'll give you one example was just like networking, right? Like it's uncomfortable to go to a meetup and meet people.

But like that's where a lot of success is found. Can you think of any more? Yeah, a huge one is telling people in your personal sphere. this is what I'm looking for. Really? Like people do this when they get their license also. They become agents and it's the same funnel. Now you got to go lead generate.

Look for what you want. You're an agent. You want buyers and sellers. You're an investor. You want properties. They always like agents would go knock on doors of complete strangers in 90 degree heat and try to get a stranger to let them sell their house. Then go to their sister or their best friends, people that, they're coworkers, people that

like them. And those are the people that are way more. likely to actually care about you being successful. So there's something about not maybe wanting to acknowledge that my identity is a real estate investor that stops people from, you should be telling your aunts and your cousins and your coworkers, people that you come across every single day. You want it drilled in their head. When you guys hear about somebody passing away or a problem property that someone doesn't know what to do with, call me. I want to be the first phone call you get. And instead, they'd rather, you know, spend a much money to make a website or get business cards made

and hand them out to strangers and hope something happens. I think that's one habit that just absolutely shoots people in the foot. I think discomfort gets such a bad rap, right? It's just, you know, there's a gazillion dollar industry in terms of drugs of trying to minimize pain and discomfort. But again, it's just a feeling, right, with drugs, right? It's just a feeling, though. Discomfort is our compass.

And I think the more comfortable you can get with it, the more successful you'll be. There's no question about it. You know, I always use the analogy of, like, jumping in a pool, right? So someone who's fearful of swimming, they're going to do everything but jump in the pool, right? So they're going to hire a swimming instructor. They're going to find the best pool. They're going to look online or whatever to find a cool bathing suit. They're going to find goggles.

Eventually, you just got to jump in the pool. And the truth is, it's not all that bad, right? Especially if you have support and you have a team around you. But even if it's not, you know, one of my favorite personal mantras is the monster is never as scary as it seems. It's something my mom always told me. It's like I think it just resonates for every part of my life. Like I, you know, I was scared to go to middle school, to high school, to college. It's like the monster is never as scary as it seems.

Right. And I always say that to myself. And it's true. It's often the anticipation of something is way worse than the actual event itself. Right. So for you, the idea of not having ice cream was way worse than actually, you know what, it's not that bad. Or maybe I'll have something else instead.

Yeah. Or maybe it's cold calling someone or maybe it's going to a networking event. And it's like, you know what? it actually isn't that bad. We build it up in our head. The monster is never as scary as it seems. Man, you got the wrong, you went in the wrong business line. You should have been a T-shirt maker.

I'm telling you got so many good. These phrases are so good. I love it. One thing I've noticed, Adam, about the monsters never as scary as it seems, is that whenever you're in that initial, okay, I know I want to do this, but I'm just, I know I should jump in the pool, but I'm just afraid. Oftentimes, taking that jump with somebody else really, really helps. If there's someone that walks into jiu-jitsu with you for the first time, or for me, it was going to the weight room.

I was incredibly skinny. That's kind of hard to believe now. But I was very insecure. I don't want to be the skinny guy in the room full of strong guys trying to figure how a machine works. So my friend went with me once or twice, just showed me how the machines work, showed me what your form should look like. And that was enough. I was off and I was running. Oftentimes I've just found that a lot of people don't want to take that plunge alone.

Do you have advice when it comes to like this realm of diet? it and fitness and focusing on good habits where if you can get somebody else to do it with you in the start and get some inertia going, some momentum, you'll probably just keep going on your own. Yeah, I mean, I think you said it. If you have people around you, whether it's a friend or a trusted advisor or a coach or whatever it is, having someone else there to have a towel wide open for you ready when you're out of the pool and say, you know what, that wasn't so bad, right? It's a game changer. You know, I think so many people are obsessed with DIY. Like, yourself. And, you know, these are the same people that are jogging in place, so to speak,

year after year, whether it's in business or fitness, right? There's so much pride that I did it myself. But just because you want to do it yourself doesn't mean you have to do it all by yourself. You know, and this kind of goes into my next rule, but, you know, not to jump the gun too much, but the most successful people I know by far have teams and have people helping them, right? They have coaches. So I think it's a, I think it's a mindset adjustment saying, you know what, there's no shame in asking for help. In fact, it's actually silly to not ask for help because I'm remaining stuck. Yeah, that's really good. Hey, you know, I want to really, well, I'm back, one more kind of anecdote to what we're talking about here with this rule about discomfort.

Recently, my kid, uh, this was a couple months ago, my kid got sick, like, just like, I got a fever. And it was like 101 or 100.5 or something like that, like a little bit rough up there, right? And my wife asked the doctor, like, should we, we give him some Tylenol or Advil or, you know, children's Tylen or whatever. And he said, eh, he said, actually, you do that, you'll prolong the sickness. Now, again, I'm not a doctor. I'm not a doctor advice here. So don't just like not give your kid medicine. But he said, if you do that, you'll knock his fever down a little bit. But the fever is what's killing the virus that's in him. Whatever the problem is right now, the fever is killing. So it's better

to let him sweat it out unless he's really uncomfortable, like to the point of like pain and like, you know, suffering. Like, let him sweat it out a little bit. And I just think that's so true for life sometimes. It's like it's it's that discomfort that forges our identity, that forges our skill set, that forges our character. I mean, that's like a, what, a biblical thing, right? They're like, you know, the tribulation brings like perseverance and perseverance brings, you know, character or whatever that that progression is. And I think we often, yeah, we just try to find the fastest way out of doing anything. Like, well, I'll find somebody else to analyze the deals for me. I'll find somebody else to talk to the real estate agents for me. I don't want to go

through the pains, I'm going to find another way out of it. But sometimes it's just best to go through it, isn't it? Just build that character. I think you're going to like this. This might be another t-shirt, actually. All right. Good. So think about in your life, the times when we feel most powerful is always after doing something uncomfortable, right? It's always after doing something uncomfortable. Whether it's jihitsu, weightlifting, doing a public speech, you know, reaching out to someone. It's always after doing something uncomfortable. We never feel powerful after doing something easy. Right. And we all want to feel strong and powerful. So sometimes also when you think about, hey, you know, on the other side of discomfort, I'm going to get to feel awesome. I'm going to get to feel strong and powerful. It makes it a little easier too. And nobody ever said coming out of a gym, oh, I wish I wouldn't have worked out today.

Like nobody, nobody says that, right? Every time I've ever gone to the gym or jiu-jitsu or anything, every time I'm like, dang, I'm glad I did that today. I didn't want to. I was irritated and it was in my busy part of my day, but I did not want to. So I love that point. Well, what about, speaking of busy, what about those people who would say, I'm just too busy to eat healthy to work?

I'm too busy. I'm too tired. I'm too stressed. Like, what do you say to those people? Well, there's two things to that. one, it all really boils down to FDR, as I call it. Fear, discomfort, and resistance, right? When you kind of come up with these rationalizations, it often comes down to, if you boil

it down to, whether it's, again, fitness or business, it's fear, discomfort, or resistance. FDR. So if you can diagnose exactly what you're feeling and get to the root of it, it becomes a lot easier. So that's number one. And number two, you know, when people say and tell me, you know, they're too busy to focus on their health. I always challenge them to reframe it because I say, listen, you have too much responsibility to not be the best version of yourself, right? You have too much going on to not be the

best version of yourself versus I'm so stressed. I'm just going to give in. I'm just going to do whatever I want. So I always challenge them to reframe it to I have too much going on to not be the best version myself because of course, when you take care of yourself, when you invest in new time, it helps you do everything better. Yeah, that's so good. You know, one thing, people often say I'm too busy for stuff. I've even said it many times in my life. I'm too busy. I'm too busy. But the reality is we have time for something in our life. Right. So what I always try to reframe that is instead of saying I'm too busy, it's not a priority. So if I say I'm too busy to play with my kid, really what I should be saying is it's not a priority for me to play with my kid. It's not a priority for me to work out.

It's not a priority. And at least then I'm being honest because that's the honest truth is it's not a priority. But when you reframe it like that, it changes your mindset to go, no, it is a priority. So why don't I treat it that way? And yeah, fitness, health, the gym, like all those things that I want to say I'm too busy for. It really puts it into perspective. Yeah, I mean, I think that's a great point. And it's not so easy to say, I'm too busy or, you know, playing when my kids is not a priority. But when you boil that down, you break that down, you know, especially with health and fitness and business,

if someone says, you know, being financially free is not a priority or my health isn't a party. I mean, no one, everyone values their health. everyone values, everyone, everyone listens to this wants to be financially free. So then I would encourage you to say, all right, well, what is it really, what's holding you back? And it's probably fear, discomfort or resistance if you really break it down. You know, Brandon, it's something I'm thinking about when it comes to fear, comfort, and resistance. Those are the enemies. You're so dead on. I mean, every single thing in my life I'm not doing that I think would be cool if I could do is absolutely one of those things that stops it. So it can't just be me. Part of what we talk about

on bigger pockets is get financially free so that you don't have to do the things. you don't like to do anymore. And I'm wondering if people are buying into that mindset, the reason they are pursuing the goal of financial independence is because they're thinking, oh, I won't have to do hard things at work anymore, or I won't have to deal with expectations that I can't meet, or I won't have to wake up. Well, maybe that's a bad example. I want to do something with my day. I won't have to have any structure, discipline, or consistency. And if you're pursuing your goal for the reasons that would stop you from being able to actually achieve it. Have you thought about that before, Brandon?

Yeah, that's interesting. I think, yeah, it's kind of like I want to quit my job so I can just sit around and relax all the time. Those people are never the ones that actually achieve that. That's exactly right. Yeah, that's super interesting. It's like the people who, anybody who can achieve financial freedom won't take financial freedom. Like any of the three of us could probably just sit back right now and work five hours a week or two hours a week or whatever. And we could do it.

And, you know, our businesses would survive and thrive probably still. But we're just not wired that way. Like we've like it's not about, it's like saying, I'm going to diet so that I don't have to diet the last half of my life. Or I want to exercise so that I don't have, so I can eat whatever I want at any time. Yeah. Yeah. Right.

If you think that way, then you're not going to go exercise and you're never going to get to that point. Yeah. Yeah. That's funny. Adam, what do you think? What's your experience with this? Yeah, there's no question. I mean, it kind of reminds me it's like, you know, I try to be a very intentional parent.

And it's like people who read parenting books. The number one reason why those types of people are better parents is because they care about it. It's not necessarily, I mean, of course, the books matter. But anyone who is willing to read a book on parenting clearly is very intentional on being a good parent. Anyone who is thinking about these types of things, yes, they're going to likely get to where they want to be. Yeah, I totally agree. Yeah, that's so good, man. All right.

Well, let's maybe move on to rule number five then. And then we'll go to, I got a few questions on like, what if this dog's wrong. but let's hit number five first. Yeah, I mean, listen, not to, you know, to my own horn, but there's no doubt, you know, getting a coach and getting accountable is a game changer, right? I mean, you experienced it with us. But it's also, again, it's not just in fitness, it's business, right? When you have supportive people, when you have an expert coach who can get you out of your own way,

who can help you see your blind spots, who can help you change your mindset, it's a game changer. You know, getting accountability is, is, you know, and coaching could, you know, is the difference between sometimes success and not. A hundred percent. They did this study. I talked about it in one of the speeches I gave up BP, maybe it was B-P-P-Con. Maybe it was another conference I went to. Anyway, there's a study, I think it was like Dominican University did it, where they grabbed people and they like divide them into like five different groups, like people who had a goal. And I think it was to lose weight or workout as a fitness thing, but it applies to everything in life. And it was like, those people, they just, they were going to do it.

The next group, they were going to do it and they set a goal. The next group, they were going to do it. They set a goal and then they like kept track of their progress. And then the next group was they did all those things, but they also told a friend that they were going to do it. And the last group was they told the friend, but they had weekly accountability on that, with that friend. And the difference between accomplishing the goal between the first group in the last,

I think it was like 37% and like, I don't know, 89 or 92. It was like drastically. It was like basically a three times higher for the people who went through that whole. process. Like they had a vision. They wrote down where they wanted to go. They kept track of their progress. So they had the consistency. They made their thing public what they were trying to do. And then they got the accountability. And it just shows that accountability in anything. We talk about this at bigger pockets all the time about having mastermind groups, getting together every week or every couple weeks with a group of people. Like this has been an integral part of my life,

an integral part of David's life. I would say, David, are there like a lot of successful people you can think of, I mean, like the real estate investors that we know that are super high level who don't have either a performance coach or a mastermind group or something like that. I mean, I can't think of a single one. Like, everybody has some sort of accountability in their life that gets to that level. The only people that don't, there's a small handful are people who are naturally driven to great lengths. And every time you get to know that person, you find that there is an ocean of pain inside of them. and it drives them to be like, I will never go back to where I was before. And it's usually that I should also say they only have success in like one area of life that

got them out of that pain. They're never well-rounded. So you might know a person that has like 100 properties like, where did this person come from? But they're socially weird. They don't have a big social life. They're usually not in great shape. They're not crushing it in any area other than that one area where they had an intense pain. The people that are having like I was just talking to our buddy Andrew Cushman.

about Sam Wager, one of our Go Abundance buddies. And he went through martial arts when he was young and did very, very good. Then he started opening up studios or academies. They started franchising him. He's like 28 years old now and the dude's making, I think he's grossing 100K a month in rental income from the different investments that he has. Sam is one of those guys that's good at a lot of different things. He has this well-rounded life because he's taken the principles from one area and he's

applied them to the others. But he's plugged in to, like you said, a group, a mastermind. Everyone expects that Sam will be fit. If Sam gained weight, there's like a hundred people that would be like, what's going on and poking him in the stomach? Like there's no way he could possibly lose it. So, yeah, to your point, the few examples that I could think of that are not in a group are usually you would never want to trade places with that person.

They went through so much hell to get to the point where they could drive themselves out of that place and it's only in that one area that they're successful. Yeah. Adam, why does accountability work so well? Like having somebody that you're reporting to. Like why, I maybe go back to the willpower thing we talked about earlier. But like, why am I so much better at eating good when I know that, you know, Matt, my tutor's going to see it versus what I'm just doing it on my own?

Yeah, I mean, a few things. I mean, number one, it's just very easy to rationalize to ourselves, right? It's very easy to tell ourselves, I'll start fresh tomorrow or I'll start fresh on Monday. And number two, it's, you know, it's very easy to break promises to yourself. but it's a lot harder to break promises to other people. And, you know, we're constantly letting ourselves down. But when you have someone else in the picture who you don't want to let down, it changes everything. So, you know, it's, you know, if you're, it's all about expectations, right?

If you constantly meet external expectations. So if you feel bad letting people down, you know, accountability is great for you. You know, and if you or feel like you're always letting yourself down, you're a perfect candidate for accountability. That's so good. Yeah, I call that the Monday principle. And it's this idea that people constantly will, whether it's, I mean, it happens all the time with food, right? Is you screw up something and you're like, well, I'll work out on Monday. I'll start back up again on Monday. I'll start back on my real estate goals on Monday. And it might be Tuesday. So it's going to be like six more days. There's one thing I like about having like daily accountability. Now, that's not always reasonable for everybody in the world to have daily accountability with

their business. You're not meeting with your mastermind group every day. Though I guarantee you if you were, you'd be so much more super productive. and your business would grow faster. But it's hard to fit it in. But it's one thing, like, I might have a bad day with, like, food. Like, I might have, like, just fly off the handle and go eat a huge ice cream Sunday because I wanted to and, you know, whatever. That happens.

But then, like, I report it that night and I let Matt know. And then I wake up the next morning and I got this message like, hey, man, Sai, you had that thing. What can we do next time to make sure that if you're in that same stressful situation, that doesn't happen again? And those questions, like, he's never yelling at it. I mean, like, what a moron, right? But it's just the questions that are like, what can we do that?

That doesn't happen again. And then that day, I'm back on again. So I don't have to wait until Monday. I don't have to wait until the new year. I don't have to wait until the next quarter because it's this daily accountability, which I'm a big, big fan of. Well, thank you. I mean, listen, there's no question.

I mean, accountability is the glue that ties commitment to a result. And, you know, again, without it, it's too easy to rationalize to ourselves. It's too easy to say, you know, screw it. I already, you know, messed up. I'll start fresh, you know, Monday or tomorrow or, or, you know, I had a client told me she was trying to start fresh on Monday for the last 20 years. You know, and she finally said, you know what? I need some help.

I need accountability. And, you know, it was a game changer for her. Yeah, man, I love it. Yeah, a huge piece of my life in a lot of areas. I mean, I have performance coaches. I have the jiu-jitsu coach. I have my body tutor that I use. I use all these different areas of my, I mean, I even like, I have my own intention journal.

I fell out every morning and once a week. All those things are designed to keep me present. and like present with my goals, present with what I actually want in life. It's crazy that we have like these two lives in our heads, isn't it? Where there's like this one life that you have, you're like, I want to feel good, I want to look good, I want to have money. I want to be a good father and a good husband, a good wife, a good mother, daughter, whatever. Like you want to, you have this ideal version that very much wants to be that person. And this other person is like, no, I don't want that at all.

I just want to eat cake, right? And like watch TV or TikTok all day. And I am so much more, like I naturally want to be the one that eats cake and plays with TikTok all day. So by having accountability, it reminds me of who my true self is. And my true self is the one that is fighting for to become a better person. It's like that old anecdote that we probably all heard before about, you know, inside of us there's two wolves. There's a, you know, a light wolf and a dark wolf or whatever. and they're fighting for your soul.

And the question is, well, which one wins? And it's the one that you feed. And so accountability is feeding the, I don't even know what you call that. Part of you, part of you that's more right and true with how you actually are. Like your true identity. And David, maybe this goes into our topic. We've been talking a lot about identity. Is you kind of are, you have two warring identities within yourself.

and the one that wins is the one that you feed and that you hold accountable to. So I don't know. I think that's a fascinatingly deep topic we could spend an hour on, but I like it. That duality is unbelievable and it's super fascinating. And, you know, I call, you know, we all have this inner voice, that inner voice that says eat cake, watch TikTok, don't do anything productive. Right. And I think you, I mean, you articulate it beautifully. When you have accountability, you create this other voice, right?

you create this almost, I create it's almost like having a soundtrack, right? Imagine having the Rocky soundtrack in your head all the time to counter that inner voice that says, watch the TikTok, eat the cake, et cetera. Right. So when you develop that strong inner voice to counter that other inner voice, you know, it changes everything for sure. Yeah, really good. Well, okay, let's talk, let's talk before we get out of here about what if things go wrong. Like, I know, like, you're trying to lose weight. You just can't do it. You're struggling with this. Like, what do you do when those things, go wrong or or you have problems in your fitness journey or in your and your just life journey.

Yeah. I mean, listen, I think, you know, there's always going to be challenges and hiccups on any worthwhile journey. As I said, I mean, you know, usually it comes down to a few things. Number one, it's, you know, you're just feeling too overwhelmed and you feel like, you know, you just don't have time for this. And again, I think it's really important to go back to your vision. And I think it could sound very hokey and very cheesy.

Oh, I need a vision. But again, having a compelling vision makes it easy. to stay the course, right? It makes it easier to show up even when you don't feel like showing up. It makes it easier to say, you know what? These are important things. These are my core anchors, my, you know, core balls that you're juggling. When I do these, it's going to help me do everything else.

That's really good. All right. So you're feeling too overwhelmed with everything. I know I've been there before. There's also why in real estate and business, we talk about like just, yeah, doing like focusing more, building fewer bridges. doing less things, but doing them better. I mean, that's a huge piece of like the essentialism with Greg McKeon, who wrote essentialism. It's like doing less but better. And that helps me

feel less overwhelmed. Do you feel the same? Is that how this applies? Yeah, absolutely. No question. No question about it. I have a completely unrelated question. Well, not completely unrelated, but it's a little off the topic. And I really want Adams opinion on this. One of the things that we often criticize or the people who post pictures of their body on Instagram or Facebook or whatever, specifically get attention because they've done a good job. And it's very easy to say, oh, they're just looking for attention. And I'm not saying that we should stop criticizing because I'm not sure where I stand on that. What I am asking is, do you think, Adam, part of the reason they do that is they are continually reinforcing themselves with like, look, I should stay on

this path because I did good and I want to get attention for it. I have a lot of thoughts on social media and posting pictures. But we won't discuss that. There is no doubt they're creating this identity of themselves. And once they create this identity, it makes it easier to live up to this identity over and over and over again. Right. So they have this identity. They're clearly trying to create and portray online. And they are going to make sure their actions align with their identity. So it does maybe make it easier for them to feed that specific wolf. And that's part of the reason that people do it. We'll give them the benefit of the doubt and say yes. Absolutely. Because there's clearly other things they're feeding and I recognize that.

I just didn't want to go too far down that path. I'm just trying to figure out is there a little bit of they do this because it makes it easier to eat better and to make sure they go to the gym because they're going to get some hit from everybody seeing how great they're doing. No question. Yes. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, I find that in my own life a little bit like the fact that I'm like when I went to jujitsu the first time is because I talked about it here on this podcast, I was going to do it. And Jocko Willink was like, you're going to do it. And I'm like, I'm going to do it. Right. So I feel like I shifted my identity a little bit. Now, I don't put pictures of myself with my shirt off on the internet very often, but or at all. But that definitely,

I can see that plane of pieces, like getting that kind of public accountability. That said, I'm curious. I'm curious. I'm curious. Yeah, what are your thoughts, Adam, on the public idea of like posting a picture of your shirt off and saying, all right, I need to change my life. I'm overweight. I'm going to lose 30 pounds. This is my accountability post. Does that work on social media to do something like that? Or saying, I'm going to go buy a real estate deal in the next 30 days. You watch me. Does that work? Yeah. So there's no doubt the first few pounds are always exciting. The first few calls, the first few times, you know, you get your business card. You set up your website for business. Those are always the most exciting. Everyone's there to clap on, clap, clap you

on, cheer you want. But what happens after the first few pounds? What happens after the first deal. That's where the real magic happens. And typically those people who do those types of posts find themselves fairly lonely because again, everyone wants to cheer for the new person on the block, whether it's in real estate business, fitness. But typically it doesn't last because they're on to the next thing. Right. And unfortunately, weight loss and fitness and business success is not a hammer hitting plate glass. It's about the accrued power of thousands of choices over and over and over again. Yeah. So good. All right. What else we got here for problems? I say like you're too overwhelmed with everything.

So we talked about that. What else you got for problems? I know you got a couple listed here. Yeah. The next one is, you know, you're not feeling motivated or committed anymore. And typically what I find is a lack of motivation or a lack of commitment, you know, really stems down to a lack of hope. And my formula for hope. And this applies to business and fitness, of course, like everything we're talking about here is really very simple. Number one, it's having a clear and defined goal. Number two, it's having a pathway to reach your goal. and number three, it's believing you can actually follow the pathway, right? Clear and defined goal, having a pathway, and believing you can follow the pathway. And what happens so often is we start these crazy plans or these crazy regimens or these crazy

ideas and we don't believe we can follow it for more than a few weeks. Right? So subconsciously or consciously, we give up and we don't feel hopeful and then we lose the motivation or we lose the feeling of commitment. So it's really important that you believe you can follow the pathway. whatever pathway you're following, whether, again, it's business or fitness. Yeah, really good. All right.

Next, what other problems you see coming up on people's lives when they're trying to change their life? Yeah, we kind of alluded to this before. It's just that effort mentality, right? It's like, if I can't be perfect or I already messed up, why bother? And this is, you know, this is a very, very common thing. There's no doubt it's a perfectionist mentality. you know, and I think it's really important to allow yourself the humanity to be less than perfect because guess what? We're not robots, right? We're not robots. And to expect perfection is like

chasing the wind. It's never, you're never going to catch it, right? So it's far more effective to go 80% or allow yourself a chance to actually win the day than aim for 100% only to burn out. And the truth is the number one reason why, or one of the reasons why people aim for perfection is it's an easy way out because, you know, it's like, all right, well, I started, I tried, I did it, and then they're on to the next thing, whereas the real work and the real magic is getting through those uncomfortable times and getting through that initial excitement period, right, when that motivation wanes. Yeah, that principle of getting through, uh, I call it like the trench. And it was kind of a joke started because of Scott Trench, you know, the CEO of Bigger

Pockets, but I call it the Trench, which is like every business, every fitness plan, every goal that people have, it starts with this like, I'm super excited and everyone, like your, your momentum, your motivation, everything's so high. And then it drops. And it goes way lower than where you even started. Like you're down and like, like, this sucks. I don't like this anymore. Right. Like, you come to a webinar that I teach on bigger pockets. I'm like, this is what financial freedom is. This is what you can do. You can travel the world. You can surf and be with your family. And everyone's like, woo, I love it. And then they, they start analyzing deals. If like a week or two, they're like, oh, running the numbers and they're getting it and they go to an open house and then and then they

watch a little bit of TikTok or they're watching some Netflix or they got busy with life. And then pretty soon they're in that trench where it's like they haven't seen the reward yet because it takes a while to get that reward. And so the immediate excitement's gone. They haven't come up the other side of the trench. So they're just in the bottom of the trench. And like that could be a book in itself, just like getting through that trench. If you can get through that to the other side, like that's where successes. I often say Josh Dorkin, who found a bigger pocket, almost 20 years ago, he's the best, and I said over and over, he's the best entrepreneur I know. Not because he's a genius, he is a genius, but not because of that, not because he's great at managing people and hiring and all that, which he is.

It's because he's stuck with it through the trench for 15 years or whatever, 10 years before he even hired as a very first person, me. And because of that, of making no money for 5, 10, 15 years, back out of the result. So it's like people who achieve the body that they want, they get through that trench. The business they want, they get through that trench. The relationship they want, they get through that trench. And I think if people understood that principle,

just so many lives would be changed. I think one of the secrets to getting through that trench is having accountability, having support, having a coach. Yes, right? Because we know those trenches are inevitable. They are absolutely inevitable. And I think some people think they're not going to be there. Right, but they are inevitable, so you might as well plan and prepare for them.

That is very close to the comment that I was going to make. Brandon, you mentioned like three things there. You have this initial excitement. Like, I'm going to do this thing and it feels like fun and exciting. And like Adam said, the first few pounds are easy. Then you hit a trip. It's very difficult. You don't get results.

You're basically just doing the thing over and over and over, whether it's going to jihitsu class, trying to change your diet, trying to work out. And you just suck at it and there's no ROI. And then you get to the other side. You have these three stages. I've always looked at that initial excitement phase. The people who mess up are the ones who say in their head, I will do this as long as it's exciting and easy and fun.

And when it stops being that, they drop off. Oh, I guess it's not for me. It's not fun anymore. The people that do well recognize that excitement phase is a gift. It's like when you're teaching like Rosie to swing and you give her the first push. And then after that she has to kick her feet and keep going. And they use that initial push to build the habits and the system.

that they will need to be sustainable. Because that's hard. Jiu-Jitsu is really hard when you're in the grind. It's maybe fun the first couple times you go. So that's where you really need to find accountability partners. Find people that are going to keep you going to class. Sign up to go to class. Put it in your schedule.

Get enough going that when it stops being fun, you have these habits that are in place that you will keep doing it that will get you through the trench. And that's sort of what Adam had said is you're going to go into a trench and you have to be ready. Don't look at that initial excitement. like that's the way it's supposed to be all the time. I think in relationships it's probably very similar.

You meet someone, you fall in love and you're like, this is the best thing that's ever happened. And then when that initial thing wears off, you're like, oh, I just need to find a new person. No, that initial, this is the best thing ever, was meant to build that bond and these like habits that keep your relationship healthy. Then you actually get into a real relationship

where you think about other things. You actually remember you're supposed to eat and you go to work and you make money. If it was exciting like that all the time, we would die. You'd never do anything other than focus on that. Do you think I'm way off there? Do you guys agree that that might be the best approach? I love the idea of thinking about that initial excitement as a gift because it is. And there's no doubt the most successful people know that it's going to wane and that it's going to go away.

And that's when the voice in your head, that inner voice we talked about gets louder and louder, right? It's going to say, do I really want to do this? Is this really worth it? Do I really want to stay up until 2 a.m.? Do I really want to make that cold call? That voice in your head is going to get a. a lot louder as time goes on as the excitement wanes. And that's super important to really be aware of that and prepare for it. Yeah. So, I mean, I think you're right on the money.

That's so good, man. All right. Well, we got to start wrapping things up. Anything else you want to cover in problems? Anything else that holds people back? Or should we move on to the to the I think we should talk about self-sabotage quickly just because I think it's so powerful. Sure. So self-sabotized, of course, applies to every worthwhile goal. You know, we And I'm sure this is, you know, so common for your listeners and viewers and all that. You know, they listen to the podcast. They buy the courses. They buy the books.

They attend the seminars, all sorts of things. But for some reason, they're not making progress. And my definition of self-sabotage is when you fear the very thing you're trying to accomplish, right? You fear the very thing you're trying to accomplish. And here's what I mean. Let's take a typical business owner. A typical business owner feels like they have. the weight of the world on their shoulders. They feel like they have zero free time. They feel like

they have a ton of responsibility. And they feel like they have no time for themselves, right? They just feel all these things. So on some level, they feel like if they grow their business or if they move the needle forward, they're going to have less free time. They're going to have more responsibility, more headaches, more pains in the bus, all sorts of things. Right. So on some level, they're attending all these courses, buying the books, getting coaches, et cetera. Deep down, and they feel like their life is actually going to be worse off than better off. So the key to overcoming self-sabotage is understanding how your life will be better, right? And when you can truly understand how life will be better, then you can overcome self-sabotage, right?

And there's a very simple framework and exercise I came over to do it. And it's number one is how do you think your life will be worse off and really articulate it, really write it down, right? So how is life going to be worse off? I don't know. Maybe you'll say, I have less free time. Or if you bring it back to a dieter, I'll never be able to. able to eat my favorite foods again. So you write out five of those. Then you write out how your life

will be better off. And then you challenge those assumptions because so much of what we do is we create these assumptions and these false beliefs to protect us so we can stay where we are. Right. Because as we know, it's much easier to stay where we are than to move forward. What do you think about that? That's so good. That's really good. Yeah, we have, you fear the very thing you're trying to accomplish. I wrote that down. And I started thinking, yeah, where in my life am I doing that? Um, Man, yeah, multiple areas. I'll say that I think that's one of the reasons accountability works. Because if you leave it up to David, I may sabotage myself because I think I don't deserve that.

I may sabotage myself because I have unresolved hurt from when I was nine that I don't know about. And I'm mad at my mom or my dad. And so I'm going to hurt myself to get back at them. And that's motivating me. And I don't, I'm not aware that it's even happening. I don't see my own blind spots. But if I got to go to Brandon, who's put, he. put his endorsement on me. And he says, dude, why are you slipping? I need you here. All of my

BS just goes out the window. I don't care anymore. I'm letting him down or I'm embarrassed in front of Brandon. And making that decision becomes very clear and very easy. And imagine if you had like nine or 10 brandons in your life that you did not want to let down that looked at you the way you should look at yourself, that loved you the way that you should love yourself, that expected more of you. and you don't want to let them down. I think that's the key is when I withdraw from everyone else and I try to do it on my own, which most of us do because we don't want people seeing our flaws. We don't want people seeing where we suck.

As everybody listens to this, they're thinking, I'd like to do that, but I would fail because of all these reasons. We filled for more reasons than you did. All of us on this thing have those same issues. But it just makes it easier for me to get out of my own way when there's other people there.

Yeah. And just to go back, you know, to a tactical thing, you know, like say, for example, of you guys in your business, right? Let's say you feel like you're self-sabotaging because you feel like

more success is actually more responsibility and worse off, not better off life. So what I would challenge you to do is put the systems and put the people in place so that you can handle the growth so that when you do grow, life will be better, not worse, right? So that's a tactical thing in order to overcome the self-sabotage. And if you're self-sabotaging with your diet, again, really think about why you think your life will be worse off and challenge those assumptions, right? The number one thing for dieters is always, you know, I feel like I'm going to have to be in the gym for hours a day or I feel I'm never going to be able to eat my favorite foods. And as you know, that's just not true. Yeah, it's, it's not true at all. And I think that's probably one of the biggest miss when it comes

to getting in shape is that it's going to require you to sacrifice everything in your life and it's going to be a worse life. But by challenging that assumption and you realize, like, that's just not always the case, all of a sudden then you're more likely to avoid the self-sabotage, get the life that you want. So good. All right, man. This has been fantastic. It's definitely one of my favorite episodes we've ever done on the show.

But we got to start wrapping. So let's head over the last segment of the show. It's called our Famous for. It's part of the show. We asked the same four questions to every guest every week. And we're going to throw them at you. So number one, is there a current habit or trait you are working on improving in your own life? Less phone time.

No question. And I really, you know, I'm trying to work on that. And the way I'm actually doing it is I recently started putting my phone away. So it's not even near me. That's a big one for Brandon, too. Brandon talks about that. Yeah, big one on me all the time. Yeah.

I use it way too much. All right. What is your favorite business book? Actually, very similar to what we were talking about with the trenches is the dip by Seth Godin. And, you know, the cover of the book is basically this hill and then it goes down and then up. And the idea of the book is that the most successful people are able to get through the dip. And it's also about, you know, if you're going to do something. Somebody already wrote the book.

That's funny. No, no, no, that's a dip. Yours is the trench. Yeah. Now, it's good and won't mind if you completely copy his entire book. You're being too kind to me. I'm never, I'm never writing the trench now. It's over.

Seth Godin wrote it. Look, Brandon, I have buy rehab, rent, refinance repeat. And people are, people are writing by renovate rehab refinance repeat and completely ripping If they can do that, you can write a book called The Trench instead of a dip. All right. Anyway, all right. Next question, Adam. What are some of your hobbies?

I love basketball. I love exercise. I love, you know, playing with my, I mean, I don't know if that's a hobby. I love playing with my kids. You know, my life, it's interesting. It's very, very simple. It's, you know, work, family, friends. Like, it's essentialism.

But I would say my favorite hobby, I love playing basketball. Basketball is my favorite hobby. Haven't you just learned a ton of life lessons out of what came out of basketball? Oh, totally. I feel bad for all the people that are really tall but never actually played it. They have no idea what they missed out on in life. What about the people who are really short who wish they could be in the NBA? Yeah, that's me.

I'm the guy who is short from the standards. But I can't share any basketball now. There's a Brandon because he didn't like sports when he was. I don't get him. I played in college, all right? In church league in college. So does that count? I'm thinking what we need to do sometime is we need to have like a my body tutor slash bigger pockets like fitness boot camp or like hang out and talk for a few days here in Maui.

So we're going to, I think we should do that sometime. I'm going to make that happen in the next few years. We're going to do it. My bigger tutor. That's what we'll call it. My bigger tutor, yes. All right. My last question of the day.

What do you believe sets apart successful entrepreneurs and successful, we'll call it, get insurance. shapers from those who give up, fail, or never get started? Great question. I think the first thing that comes to mind is resilience is that, you know, when you inevitably face those trenches, those dips, those hardships, you don't pack it in, right? As they say, you know, when the going gets tough, the tough get going. So I think it's your ability to push through those inevitable trenches and dips. And again, I think in order to do that, you have to have a compelling vision of why, it's worth pushing through those and of course having support and accountability but no doubt it's resilience.

Sweet man. I love it. All right, Adam, where can people find out more about you? Yeah, you can find me on all the socials. I'm mainly active, most active on Instagram, My Body Tudor. But you can find me on Instagram. You can find me in MyBodytutor.com. We actually created a page, MyBodytutor.com slash bigger pockets.

So we have a special gift for you guys. and I think you guys will really love it. Yeah, so you can find us there and I hope to, you know, learn more about you. Is the gift Oreo cookies? Maybe. Because if it's Oreo cookies, I'm going to go there right now. Just kidding. I don't eat Oreos unless it's a planned indulgence.

That's right. I don't do it. I will say part of the gift is, listen, there's no doubt. I obviously believe in what I do. This is my life's work. I've been at this for 14 years. but my favorite thing about health and fitness is that when you feel like you conquer yourself, you feel like you can conquer the world. And that's the best part. I look at you, Brandon,

I look at so many of other clients. Like when they conquer themselves, they have the confidence and the energy to conquer them, the world. I love it, man. And you have an email course somewhere in there too, right? Because I know I get your emails and they're phenomenal. I appreciate it. Yes. There is, that is part of the gift as well. So it's a free email course on that page. All right. Well, I love it, man. I love it. I recommend everybody. everybody check it out. Adam, I want to know if I go to your page, will I find any shirtless pictures of you saying, hey, check out my new sunglasses. So, I mean, it's funny. We can really do a deep dive on this on social media. So I'm, um, there is on the Adam's story page. I talk about

why I started my body tutor and how I got it. And there actually is one shirtless pick. Um, but that's about it. But are you doing that thing where you're like, hey, look at my new sandals. And it's clearly you with your shirt on. It's really like you and shirt up. Wait, I can't. I, you have no idea. This is like my favorite. topic me and my friends like so it's like I always will like share pictures and we're like all right what was the real objective of sharing this picture yeah so it's like obviously you just want to I love it yeah it's like obviously we get it you have a nice body you have a nice house or whatever it is let's really get to the real objective yeah my favorite is when people say people often ask me

and then they fill in whatever they wanted to say and I'm like I've never in my life ever no myself or anyone else reached out to a stranger that I just saw and said how did you get that Ferrari. I'm pretty sure we all know what people do to get Ferraris. They have money. But like everyone will start their post that way. That's one of the things just makes me laugh. It's like just that's the influencer joke. Right. The influence joke is like people have been asking me about my clear skin. So let me tell you about my my yeah. It's like nobody's been asking you that question like nobody's been asking like come on. I got to know where did you get those sunglasses. I've been dying to know. I didn't even notice that your shirt was off when you took that picture. Yeah. Or that or the other one is

they'll say, I'm doing this to inspire everyone else. Like, I once struggled with issues like self-esteem and not being happy. But then I started working out, which you can see, because I'm just wearing a thong. And now all my problems went away. And you can too. And that's why I'm posting this so that you realize all your problems can be solved. If you just look at my Instagram, rather than like you said, I'm like, we know why they're posting. Yeah, it's always hilarious. And the other one is, you know, yeah, they show a picture of their, you know, new house or car. and it's like it's not about the house or car it's just what it represents and it's like okay well then why you're posting the house or car i mean it's just yeah i can it's a great point that's a great point

they never post a picture of themselves like playing having a tea party with their daughter and say this is what all my success represents is i can do this it's always it's not the car the batters but it's a lamburgating in the picture right yeah oh funny all right thank you adam this has been phenomenal really appreciate it and uh everybody listened to this show i hope you enjoyed it and Definitely, again, I know I'm an advisor with my body tutor and I've been using them for years now and it changed my life. But seriously, like, check them out. I like I wouldn't bring Adam on the show if I didn't believe 100% at every single thing he's doing here. So Adam, I appreciate you, man.

Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Thank you very much, Adam. You have basically shared with us ways that people can be more fit, ways that you can build up a business, ways that you can be accountable to other people. There was a ton of value that you brought. I really appreciate you sharing what you did with. Brandon and I here today. So did we already ask where we can find out more about you? Yep. My BodyTutor on the socials, Instagram, et cetera. And then, of course, mybodytutor.com

slash Bigger Pockets. Perfect. Thank you, guys. Love it. All right, David, get us out of here. All right. This is David Green for Brandon Diggintrenches Turner, signing off. You're listening to Bigger Pockets Radio, simplifying real estate for investors large and small. If you're here looking to learn about real estate investing, without all the height, You're in the right place. Stay tuned and be sure to join the millions of others who have benefited from biggerpockets.com. Your home for real estate investing online. Attention, passive real estate investors.

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