BILFPOD - Owning the Stage: Laganja Estranja on Authenticity, Artistry & Awakening

Episode Date: June 12, 2025

In this electrifying episode of BILFPod, Mara links up with the iconic Laganja Estranja—international drag artist, choreographer, and advocate—to talk about the beauty of transformation and the bravery of showing up as you are.From reality TV to real-life impact, Laganja shares how she’s used art as activism, navigated fame while embracing her identity, and created a platform rooted in truth and fearless self-expression.Tap in for an inspiring conversation filled with gems on:-How performance became her protest—and her power-Life after RuPaul’s Drag Race and what it taught her about resilience-Coming out as trans in the public eye and redefining visibility-Creating space for joy, cannabis culture, and  liberation-Building legacy through movement, mentorship, and authenticityWhether you’re chasing your truth or already living it loud—this episode will have you strutting toward your next level.🎧 Connect with Laganja:Instagram: @laganjaestranjaWebsite: laganjaestranja.com🎧 Connect with Mara:Instagram: @maradornePodcast: @BILFPod#BILFPod #LaganjaEstranja #AuthenticityInMotion #DragAndPurpose #RuPaulsDragRace #TransVisibility #QueerVoices #BILFEnergy #PodcastGlowUp #FearlessExpression #ArtAsActivism #WomenInMedia #BossMoves #maradorne

Was I scared to be in the airport and to go into the women's restroom? I was. You know, it is a trying time. But also, I have to continue to live my life, not only for me, but for all of those who follow me, for all of those who are looking for that inspiration and looking for the courage to be themselves. So I just do it. I just choose to wake up every day and be who I am. And if it offends someone, that's on them. Welcome back to the BILF pod

where authenticity trumps authority I am here on location with the beautiful Miss LaGanja Estrangea Thank you so much I'm so happy to have you I'm thrilled to be here But first I need to ask you Do you know what a BILF is?

A BELF, a boss I'd like to follow Yes, period but you're a BELF I mean I'm working on No, you're a BELF On TikTok I'm getting follows left and right But on Instagram it's been very slow That's okay, I follow you now

Exactly. We follow each other. Now you're going to get all the views. I love it. Well, I am so excited that you're here. And let's just dive in real quick. Okay. Let's talk about your background.

Yeah. And what you're doing, what you're going, what you want to do ultimately. Let's start there. Okay. Well, that's like seven questions right off the bat. So let me break it down. Well, originally I'm from Texas. I come from a very small town called Carrollton, Texas.

And I grew up in musical theater. My parents realized at a very early age that I was eccentric. and that putting me in sports was not the right thing to do. So once they got me from out of the outdoors and into a studio with a mirror where I could look at myself and be surrounded by girls, I was home. So I've been dancing ever since I was like seven years old. And that sort of led me up to Booker T. Washington High School, which is an amazing school in Dallas, Texas. People like Nora Jones, Roy Hardgrove, Erica Badu, incredible alumni have graduated from there. Specialized in performing arts.

Specialized in performing, right. So I studied dance there and then was lucky enough to become a presidential scholar in the arts for choreography. So basically every year, there's two smart people that are selected from each city. And then there's only 20 artists who are selected through a program called Young Arts. And you are awarded this very prestigious award. You get to go to the White House, meet the president, which at the time was Bush. So I wasn't really that thrilled with it. But now looking at the mess we're in, I'm like, okay.

Bush wasn't so bad. But I got that award. I got to present my work at the Kennedy Center. And it caught the attention of the college that I ended up going to, which was the California Institute of the Arts, which is where I studied dance, more specifically contemporary dance. And from there, I kind of fell into drag. That was never really my path forward.

I always saw myself as being a Broadway star. That's what I was raised to be. But I happened to get on a show called Rupal's Drag Race, and it changed my life forever. I've been able to travel the world and really build my own brand as LaGonga. And so now I'm trying to expand that brand. I think like any boss, you know, we have to have multiple streams and revenue. We have to have multiple streams of revenue.

Yeah. So, you know, I teach dance. I perform. I have my own clothing line. I'm currently developing a cannabis line. So I've definitely got my hands in a lot of pot when I'm not smoking it. I love that. I love that.

And that's how you got your name. That's right. So La Gonja comes from L.A.'s Gonja. I don't really remember how I made it up because I was medicated. But yeah, that's where it comes from for my love of cannabis. You know, I grew up in Texas where it was seen as a very negative thing. So when I moved here to California at the time when it was just medical, I got my medical license. And it really, it changed my life.

You know, I have a lot of anxiety and depression and sleeping and eating issues. and cannabis really helps regulate me and makes me feel like my most authentic self. Wow, okay, that makes sense. Maybe I should try it. I don't know. You never tried it? No, I did one time

and I got stuck on my couch. I couldn't move it. Okay, it must have been an indica. We call that indica couch. Yeah, that's what I couldn't get up the top of the couch and it was over. I never did it again. No.

My husband is a smoker. I'm not. Yeah, well, you know, now there's many different ways that you can get THC into your system, whether it's from infused foods or vaping. You know, there's a lot of different methods.

And now there's also a lot of different ratios. So like I think for you and what I recommend to most beginners is starting with a one to one. So it's one THC, one CBD. So CBD is very popular. It helps a lot with like aches and pains. And it's like a sort of like a natural Xanax, if you will. Yeah, I like CBD. Yeah.

So if you can get a one to one ratio, then you might find that to be more, you know, appetizing for you. I need something. I don't know. I'm like all over the place. Maybe I should try. I have anxiety too, just smoke a little, eat a little wheat, something, whatever, and just like, mel the fuck out.

Yeah. I probably need that. I think every bad boss, you know, should smoke a little weed. You need something. Yeah. Something. Something has to be your vice. Right.

Let's talk about what you were on. You were on Rupal's drag, right? Yeah. Rupal's drag race. How did you, like, I don't understand. Did you have to like apply? Did you just like wake up one day and you're like, okay, I'm going to do this. Like, how can that happen?

Well, so again, I didn't really choose drag. I always say, drag chose me. So I was doing it for fun in college. We had a Thursday night gathering every week where all the artists from the college would get together in the main gallery and show off our work. And I started going to those parties in drag. And it just became something that I really, really loved. And so I entered this amateur competition in West Hollywood at a very famous club called Mickey's. And part of the prize package was if you won, you would become a regular show girl in their show.

So I did win that. And so there I went from just kind of doing it as a hobby to having a regular job every Monday night. I had to be able to come up with a new number, a new concept. And as an artist, that really challenged me. And I loved that. You know, coming from a musical theater background, you rehearse the same script, the same moves.

So having that freedom to really change up my act and my performance, I just loved it. So the natural next step for me as a boss was how do I make more money as a drag game. And that was getting on Rupal's drag race. And I was really lucky that my drag mom, Alyssa Edwards, was on the season before me. And she was kind of the breakout, not kind of, she was and still is the breakout star from Rupal's drag race. So I think that the production company World of Wonder really wanted to have her daughter on the show to show how crazy our family is. That's so crazy. So then you go on there and then tell me what happens. Like did Well, I went on and was a very unique character.

I'm sure, you know, we've only met once before, but as you can tell, I am eccentric and very different. And so, you know, I was a polarizing character on the show. People either loved me or they hated me. And unfortunately, in America at the time, most people didn't get me. So I actually began traveling mostly international because people in the UK have a better sense of humor in my opinion. And people in Brazil admired me for my dance.

and people in Asia loved my appreciation of their culture. So I was really able to like see the world. And then a year later, all of a sudden on the new season of RuPaul's Drag Race, everyone was quoting me left and right. And it was like this shift and people's perspective, I think really changed, you know, because they got to see me outside of the show.

When I was on the show, they took away my cannabis. And it was the first time in my adult life that I didn't have access to my medicine. So I was very, you know, anxiety ridden and you saw that on the show. I had a big, big meltdown. I'm very known for saying, I feel very attacked when all the girls were coming at me. But you see, I took that moment that was really painful. Yeah. And I turned it into merch and I made money off of it. Smart. So, you know, I have learned throughout my years how to really be a boss by taking advantage of those things that

sometimes aren't easy to take advantage of, you know? Yeah, you know, I'll say this. And like people, first of all, the world has become very peacey, extremely so. So you can't do or say anything. Right. But let's talk about drag. I mean, who doesn't love a good drag show? But there's a lot of people out there. I was just going to say, there's a lot of controversy surrounding that, right?

There is. I mean, it is what it is. People don't understand it. They don't agree with it. They have their own views on it, whatever. How do you navigate around that? Like now, I mean, that's a lot. That's a lot.

And I'm sure people say a lot of shit. How do you navigate around that? You know, still remain so confident. To be honest. I have to not give a fuck. Yeah. And excuse my French. No.

You know, it's taken me a long time to be the confident trans woman that I am today. It wasn't always like this. I was really someone who was raised to look at others for acceptance. Yeah. And as a queer individual growing up in Texas, that was really hard. Yeah. And, you know,

when I came out to California, I found my tribe. I found my people. And, you know, confidence is something that I say you have to fake it till you make it. Because for a long time, I faked my confidence. And then one day, I believed it. And through faking it and through doing it over and over, I realized like, oh, I actually am that bitch. You know, I'm not faking it.

This is authentic. This is true. This is real. So, you know, I mean, I just got back from McAllen, Texas. And was I scared to be in the airport and to go into the women's restroom? I was. You know, it is a trying time. But also, I have to continue to live my life.

not only for me, but for all of those who follow me, for all of those who are looking for that inspiration and looking for the courage to be themselves. So I just do it. I just choose to wake up every day and be who I am. And if it offends someone, that's on them. Because I know I'm a good person. I know I'm an artist.

I know drag is an art form. You know, and ultimately drag helped me understand my femininity and understand my gender identity. So it's a really powerful tool. And I think that's ultimately why those who are opposed to us are against it because we represent freedom. Yeah. And I think a lot of people don't have their own individual freedom. So when they see someone like me, it confronts something that they're uncomfortable with inside, which is the lack of their self-love.

Yeah. And it's so crazy because you think that as a society, we'd evolve. We're in 2025. And people are. You would think. You would think. Yeah. But it's funny because there is such stigma.

out there. It still exists. People are still so shallow. I mean, even around cannabis, you know, and even though it's legal in so many states, you know, I think education is the key. And I think that's what's really lacking here. You know, ultimately, I think drag queens get this idea that we're groomers or, you know, that we're all reading to children. Let me tell you, I signed up for drag because I didn't want to be around kids. So there are a select few who engage in, you know, entertaining children at libraries and actually doing good work. But ultimately, you know, it is an adult entertainment industry. And that's why I can see why there is, you know, the pushback.

And there are a lot of things, you know, even as a trans woman that I disagree with amongst my community, you know, like another hot topic right now is sports and should trans people be allowed to play in sports. And, you know, my opinion is like, we need our own category, you know. I love this idea that trans. women are women, but for me, I believe trans women are trans women. We're all under an umbrella of femininity and women, but my experience is different than your experience. We'll never be the same. And I think that should be celebrated as opposed to homogenized. I love that. I mean, your take is, I love your take. That makes complete sense. I love it.

It's like not, it's not one or the other. It's like, let's have our own group. I mean, exactly. When you look at other cultures, like in Hawaii, they're known as Mahus, or when you look at Thailand, they're known as Gatoy's or Lady Boys is the more common term. You know, there is an embracement of the fact that they are both male and female. And I think that that's somewhere that I really identify with. And I think gender, much like sexuality, is on a scale, right? So if you have male over here and female over here and non-binary in the middle, from non-binary to, you know, cis female, there's different levels, right?

And so for me, I'm very comfortable in embracing my transness and embracing. and embracing the fact that, you know, I'm like a unicorn. I mean, how many people really get to live their life as one gender and then another? It's a very unique experience and it's very special. And that's why I like to be so open and honest and celebrate it because it's crazy. I mean, I've never, I've never experienced. I'm only three years under my transition right now, but it is so eye-opening just to see how women are so unequally treated. And, you know, yes.

Yes, I'm white and so I have a lot of privilege there. But, you know, being a gay male and being a trans woman, my God. I mean, it's just, it's really eye-opening. And I've always, you know, felt more connected to women. Kind of going back to what I was saying as a kid, you know, out on the sports field with the boys, I didn't like it. But the minute I got in a dance studio with women, I felt so much more comfortable. And I think that's because, you know, as women, as trans women, we are put against the burner. And there is so much that we have to do that men have no idea.

And even as a gay man who did drag, who sort of understood, it's completely different. And that's why I say, like, we belong under an umbrella, right? This umbrella of femininity. Yeah. We both belong there. But ultimately, you know, I'll never have a period. I'll never be able to give birth. And so I just think we should celebrate that as opposed to be like, no, we're the same.

You know, like we can still be together in a group, but understand the differences between us. Yeah. Well, I think it's funny that you said that, like, understanding. I don't think that men do understand what it's like to be a woman. They don't understand a lot. I don't think they understand what it's like to be a woman in society. Again, like we're in 2025, but yet we really have not evolved into a society. I mean, they're taking away your rights. It's ridiculous. It's insane. When Roe versus We got, you know, turned over, I just, I thought this is not making America great again. This is going backward. Yeah. And like you said, it's 2025. You would think that as a society, we would have evolved to. to understand that women have the right of their own body and no one should tell them what to do with them, you know, but. It's still, it's so funny. Like, we really are supposed to be in progressive time. We're not.

Right. We're not. We're stuck. Yeah. Half of us are. Yeah, you're right. Half of us are. And not everybody, but being a woman in today's society is so difficult.

Yeah. So I cannot even imagine what it's like for you that made a choice to be trans, right? And then go into this transition. Now, I'm sure you get stares. People have their own opinions. Do you ever like... But luckily, I love stairs. Yeah, I welcome them.

I love it. I mean, look at what I wear. Yeah, I love it. I feed off of attention as a performer. And so while sometimes it makes me uncomfortable when people are giving me a dirty stare, ultimately, like I said, what I believe I represent is freedom. Yeah. And so if I have to make someone confront that, I think that's powerful. I love it.

What's the craziest thing you've ever done to somebody just like, you know, giving you the stare down? Like, have you ever been like... You know, I'm not a confrontational person. My other half Gia gun, she is the one who will go after them. She will definitely say stuff. But for me, you know, I lead with love. I lead with my heart. And so I try to avoid situations like that.

Now, if someone is vocalizing their disdain for me or their hate for me, I definitely will stand up for myself. But, you know, ever since I got sober, I don't really engage in that high school behavior. Yeah, it's just not even worth it. No, it's not. It's not. It's just not. I think I'll say things like, you know, take.

a picture to last longer, like little corpse like that. But I don't really, I don't engage in that because that's a negative energy that I don't surround myself with. I love that. Amazing. I love that. So now you're going to Thailand. Let's talk about what you're doing. Are you so excited? I am so excited. So I have been many times now. Last year after I did my first gender affirming surgeries, I did what I called the Body Reveals tour, which is exactly what you would imagine. I did a very burlesque type act to show off the new goods. And it was such a hit that they've invited me to come back. And I'll also be going to Singapore as well.

So I'm really excited. I love Asia. You know, I just have a huge affinity for their culture. My best friend who I met on RuPaul's Drag Race, Gia Gunn, is Japanese. So I've just, I've always had such a connection to the culture. I think there is a lot more respect in Asia, especially for our elders, which we don't really see here. The food in Thailand is amazing. And also, you know, being trans specifically in Thailand has existed for a long time.

Yeah. So I feel really comfortable there, you know? I don't feel like I have to explain myself or that I have to assimilate quite the way I have to do here in America. You know, I think they're a lot more open with their gender, with their, you know, flexibility in their expression. Whereas here, especially in Hollywood, you know, hair, makeup, nails, outfit, every day. You know, I don't really feel comfortable just going out without the glam. Whereas in Thailand, I can roll up in sweats and put my hair in a bun and no one's going to call me a dude, you know? I love that.

Yeah, me too. I wonder, what are your, so one thing I want to ask, I always like to ask that, like, as a parent, what are your parents, like, really conservative? Are they super supportive? No, I'm, I'm so blessed, you know, I, people, people would think me being from Texas that my parents are conservative. But no, they were very democratic. they were in the high school counselor system for 30 plus years, each of them. So very blue, very for education, very for acceptance of all. My sister is gay as well and in an interrelational marriage.

And so, you know, I grew up in a beautiful environment where I was able to express myself and be put in musical theater at age seven and travel the world at 14 on a national tour of Will Rogers Follies. And, you know, the trans thing was hard for them. I'm not going to lie. I think, you know, first I came out as a drag queen, then I came out as a cannabis activist, and then it was trans.

And that was one of the things why I didn't come out sooner is because I didn't want to put them through the struggles that I knew would come with this. But ultimately in the pandemic, my real hair grew out. And I realized that I wanted my parents to know me. And I wanted them to see the brave and talented individual that they raised.

even if that came with some uncomfortable moments. And, you know, my parents are 75, 76. So there's a big generational gap there. But I think they are seeing that by me living my authentic life, I'm touching so many people. And I think that that's all they've wanted as parents, right? To raise someone who was brave enough to take their art to the next level. I love that.

And so, yeah, I mean, I'm so blessed. You know, no parents are perfect, of course. But I like to think that my parents are pretty close to. That is so, that warms my heart. They have to be proud of you. I mean, you're doing positive things and just your whole force, your whole energy. And honestly, if you didn't come out and say what you're doing in the transition, you wouldn't be living your authentic self.

Right. And parents. I wouldn't be the boss that I am today. No. And I'll tell you one thing about parents is it's unconditional. It doesn't come with conditional love. Good parents. Yeah. I mean, I know how I am with my kids.

Like anything goes, whatever's going to make them happy. Right. And I would want my kids to live their most authentic self. Doesn't matter. You know, they have to be happy. And that's what's important for me. So you're so blessed with good parents. Yes.

All right, I'm going to fire some rapid questions. Okay, I love a rapid fire. Ready? Are you right now? Okay. So what's your ultimate hype song? Ultimate. Oh, work it by Missy Elliott.

Love it. I love it. Okay. Favorite RuPaul drags race moments besides yours? I'm still going to pick myself. Are you kidding? Why would I give this to anyone else? I'm going to give it to me, All-Star 6, when I jump,

from the ceiling into the split. Okay, what is your dream collaboration? Who's it with? Miss E. Eliot. Yeah, that's actually what this tattoo is. Not only have I seen her. She looks so good. I was third row, VIP vibes.

I paid a fortune, but it was amazing. I mean, like, she's my biggest inspiration. Yeah, she saw her at level of the brand. She ages backwards. She's Benjamin Button. She is super thin, okay? Well, OZemPEC is helping all of us, doll. Listen, it does.

Look, Ozmp away, honey. I love some Ozumpic. Yeah. But she, I saw her at lovers and friends in Vegas. Okay. Yeah. Amazing. I could not.

I'm so excited for her to be at Coachella this year. I've never wanted to go because to me dressing up to go into a desert, absolutely not. Are you going to go to Coachella? Well, I'm working on it. If I can get sponsored in a golf cart to drive me around, I'm in. I love that. I love it. All right.

Heels or flats for me. Heels. Honey, always. I like them the bigger, the better. I love a bit. Well, I don't like them too big as myself because I'm already tall. Yeah. So it makes it more clocky.

But in drag, absolutely. Give me a pleaser. I like platforms. Everything is platform. I have to. Love it because it demands presence. I love it. Yeah.

All right. What's one word that defines you? One word. Sickening. I love that. I love that. All right. If you can tell anybody one thing about you, anything at all, what would you tell?

What would you want to? Let's say this. What would you want to leave your legacy as? How do you want the world to recognize you? I want to leave my legacy as kindness. I love that. I think that that's the most important thing, especially right now as we are. are so polarized as a society. I think if I can leave a legacy of kindness, that would be my

ultimate goal in life. You are really, you seriously are such an inspiration. Thank you. Everything about you, well spoken. Thank you so much. You can tell your heart is so kind. So what's next for you? So what's next for me? Lots of things. I'm working on a documentary called honoring her. It followed my first gender-affirming surgeries that I had last September and sort of the process and how I healed and got through it and then up to my tour. So working on that. And then I have a book called Honoring Him, which is sort of the counterpart to the documentary. And it's all about my childhood up until the day I transitioned. So those are two projects that I'm working on simultaneously.

I also have new music coming. My new single Ish, I think I'm the Ish, is also in the works. And then I'm trying to continue this body reveals tour. So I've only done it so far in Asia. So I'd like to expand and go through Europe and the UK and also bring it to America. I love that. You're doing so many, so many wonderful things. And I hope that today's episode really shows you that you can live your authentic self.

And it doesn't matter what people think. Yeah. Stop. You know, stop listening to the bullshit. I mean, it does matter. So I have to, I have to be honest with you. It does matter, right? Like I want these companies that I work with, like Akira, who I'm wearing today, to have respect for me.

And I do care what they think about me. Yeah, because they matter to you. That's it. The others that, you know, these over here. Those who don't matter and don't let their opinion of you matter. Ever. As a business person, as a boss, you know, it is important in my relationships that, yeah, there's a mutual respect. So I do care what people think.

Yeah. But I don't allow it to affect me and affect my choices in my life. I love that. And you really are living authentic. And I hope that that's the message that everybody gets today is living your true authentic self. First of all, is good for you. You have to, right? You can't live in this imposter syndrome thing that people are trying. You just can't do that. But most importantly, like you do, you lead with love and you leave with kindness. And that's all that really matters in the end. Yeah. You put out what you put out what you want to get back. Yeah. I really do believe in that. And I really do believe in karma. And I've seen it in my lifetime,

you know, I've, especially here in Hollywood, I've seen people who screw people. over over and over and then they go bankrupt you know so it's like I really do think it's all connected it is I always say karma's a big fat bitch at your front door yeah always and it always comes back right but I thank you so much this talk was amazing I really enjoy talking you're so insightful so lovely I'll have to see you in Florida you are going to come right we'll eat some plantains we'll do a little salsa dance I'm ready whatever you want we'll just go shopping have a good time I love it thanks for I appreciate you absolutely you're amazing thank you oh if any wants to find you, where would they find you?

That's right. You can find me across all social media platforms at LaGanja Estrangea. That's L-A-N-J-A-E-S-T-R-A-E-S-T-R-A, except for on TikTok, where I am the only La-Ganja Estrangea. Get a girl. Yes, yes, yes. Thank you, thank you. You're amazing.

That was great.