Blank Check with Griffin & David - A New Podcast

Episode Date: December 7, 2015

Griffin and David, having recently discovered Episode IV: A New Hope, discuss the 1977 film. Including, the rise of the rebel alliance, the children of Darth Vadar, the destruction of the Death Star and the biggest surprise of all: this film is amazing! Also, a big announcement, request fans to send in suggestions for a new name and present Griffmas cards with a special holiday prize! Email us at: [e-mail]

This is the podcast you're looking for. That's right. Hi, I'm Griffin. David Sims. Griffin Newman. Welcome to Griffin and Dave Presents. A new podcast. This is a new podcast.

Yeah. I bet you're saying, yeah, but what's it called? That is what it's called. It's a new podcast and it's titled A New Podcast. Griffin and David Present's a new podcast and it's titled A New Podcast. Griffin and David present a new podcast. This is of course the latest entry in the storied Griffin and David present franchise. Yep.

I guess no one really knows that we were going to do this. We didn't set this up. We did at the end of the live show. Did we? Okay. We did set this up. We did set this up. Alright. Okay. And first of all, hearty thanks to everyone who helped with the live show. Definitely. All our guests who were on the live show. Everyone who came out to watch it, everyone who's listened to it. It was a nice little capper for the whole experience of the three movies.

Yes. And all the guests we had. Yeah. All the nice guests we had. I'm just checking to see if we have any reviews. But anyway. I don't think there are any new good ones. But that was, you know, we planned this big finale show because we went,

we finished off the trilogy. It's true. We planned it weeks ahead and then at the last minute we found out something.

That there were three other movies. Star Wars movies. They were made like a long time ago. Made a long time ago. Now in a weird process. So George Lucas

made four, five, and six. By his explanation they were test screenings. Okay, well that's the explanation of that madman we had in our podcast. I said by his explanation. And he continued working on them. He says he did not officially finish them until the 90s.

Just two years. Right, they were re-released with more completed, in his opinion, sort of special effects and so on and so forth. He'd sort of, yeah, yeah. Just two years before The Phantom Menace came out and started, kickstarted what we're going to have to refer to as the original trilogy, the OT. Right. Because it's one, two, and three. Chronologically, that's how things work. Now, we know that these films had a long production time.

They started in the 70s. Yeah. But, like, they were hugely successful test screenings. Yes. Yeah, I mean, the one we're discussing today was the most financially successful film ever made. Right. Right, yes. Yes, that is a fact.

When it was released. Right, but George claims it was not released. Yeah, fair enough. I don't know why. He seems to love money. I don't know. Let's stop talking about George Lucas. We're on the same page.

We've got to stop talking about this guy. But this is the point. We started this out trying to figure out what The Phantom Mass was about. Yeah. Then we tried to figure out if Attack of the Clones was a good sequel. You can look right at you, Griffin. We tried to figure out if Revenge of the Sith capped off the story well. Good conclusion.

Was it a good conclusion? It wasn't. Now we have these three additional films, right? Yeah. I think because of the precedent we've set and how we've come about this, all we can do is look at this movie as the fourth Phantom Menace movie. That's what it is. Right. Right.

Right. I don't care what order. One, two, three, four. He made them in. Yeah. You know how long it took them to be finished? And you don't care about bits. I don't care about bits.

You just don't care about them. I don't care. I don't like them. But we're on a fourth movie, so we're going to talk about this as the fourth movie. This is a direct sequel to Revenge of the Sith. Jesus Christ. People are going to be so angry with us. No, but that's what we have to do.

Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There is a big time jump. Okay. About 20 years. So now that's the stage is set. Ooh, should I get the opening crawl? We're not going to do the opening crawl.

I think we should. We're only doing one episode. I know, but I think we're going to hit a lot of the greatest hits in a shorter more condensed form um but yeah let me i'll pull up the let me do a little housekeeping before we get into the movie sure sure uh first of all as always uh rate subscribe review oh please not only to us go right ahead but to all our our sister uh podcasts on the ucb comedy network And speaking of the UCB Comedy Network, we are delighted as always to have working the ones and zeros over here wearing the cans.

D-lish. Producer Ben, aka Perdueer Ben, aka the Ben-ducer, aka the Poet Laureate, aka the Haas, aka Mr. Positive, aka Birthday Benny. I'm going to bring that one back. Oh yeah. Not his birthday anymore. No, but hey, why not? Aka the Peeper. Yep. Aka Producer Ben? A.K.A. The Peeper. Yep.

A.K.A. Producer Ben Kenobi. Uh-huh. Ladies and gentlemen. You forgot Hello Fanel. Hello Fanel. Oh, man. Ben Hosley. It's Ben Hosley.

It's me. The Hos. Guys, I'm actually glad to be here to talk about these movies. Oh, did you enjoy this one? It was so good. Pretty good. It was really good. Let's hold off.

Let's not get into the reviews yet. Oh, yeah. No, sorry. Because I think there's something we should talk about quickly. Ben doesn't obey your schedule. He'll say what he wants. The man of the people. I just think there's something that we should talk about here. Shoot.

What? What's up? There are some exciting developments in the future of this podcast. It's true. Should we lead that off? Should we lead off? Yeah, why not? Yeah, you can lead off with that.

Sure. Go ahead. We don't have to get into that much detail yeah but but uh as part of a new deal that uh ucb has embarked upon ben's like fdr and he's brought us a new deal he's brought us a new deal for the american people essentially like a distribution deal yeah uh this podcast has been guaranteed another year. It's crazy. Yeah. Woo! I mean, yeah.

And you might start hearing ads on this thing at some point. Maybe. Yeah. You know. Now that's the thing. We're going to pay the bills. No, but I know

this is the thing. Like, everyone's been, I, you know, really am touched by how much people seem to like this show. And our fans are very outspoken and very supportive.

Of course. But I felt that caveat in every compliment I've received for the last, whatever it's been, eight months, nine months? It's been since March, yeah. Yeah. Nine months. Yeah, we've made a podcast baby. Sure. The caveat's always like, it's good.

Great podcast, but good I like the podcast I wish you guys were reading ad copy yep I've heard it too every day in fact oh no you won't have to read ad copy

someone else is gonna read ad copy it'll just don't worry about it it's all technical stuff yeah it's just gonna be there wait I don't get to read it? nah

deal's off let's just plug Squarespace deal is off are you kidding me? no cause you would just turn it into a bit I won just turn it into a bit. I won't turn it into a bit. No bits.

I respect shit. No. No bits. Okay, no bits. Housekeeping? Housekeeping. Anything else? We're going to do this podcast.

We're going to have advertising, but it's going to be great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Looking forward to it. I do think this is something we've talked about, and I want to throw this out to the audience on mic, officially. The show is going forward, but we're going to be done with Star Wars at the end of this year.

Sad but true. And so we've been trying to like really hit what is you know what is this show. It's about us. It's about the three of us in this room going mad together.

About the dynamic we've established. It's about investigation. It's mystery. It's about cinema. It's a Griffin and David mysteries. You know pop culture

investigations. But it's also this thing we're obsessed with when people are given like free reign. These passion projects. So it has been brought up that perhaps in 2016 we would rebrand. Oh, you wanted to pitch this to the listeners. I want to pitch this to the audience. I want to just put out feelers. I want to see.

All right. And then we'll get to Star Wars. Yes. It's been suggested by my brother that perhaps because- Oh, your brother. Yep. James E. Newman. James E. Newman.

Yeah. Because Griffin Day Present does not tell you much. No. No. It's also kind of annoying to search for. Yes. That's the big thing. It's very annoying to search for.

It's all right, but it's not. Yeah. That's also, we didn't know what the show was at the time that we had to pick a name. Yeah. Ben kept just being like, guys, guys, do you have a name? Come with a branding thing. And he was like, Grifflin Simsbert. And just being like, guys, guys, do you have a name? Come with a branding thing. And he was like, Griffle and Simsbert? And I was like, yes, but it didn't happen.

We didn't know. All we knew was we wanted to talk about the Phantom Menace. We were just two boys who wanted to talk about the Phantom Menace. Just two boys. And who knew what this would become? Who knew? We have a whole other year guaranteed, locked up, unless I cancel the deal because I want to read copy.

But the idea of the podcast would function exactly the same way. Yeah. Rather than being Griffin, David present, colon, and then whatever the new name of the thing is for the miniseries we do, it would be blank check, colon. Oh, yeah, blank check. Right. Yes. That was my idea. Right.

I pitched it to you on Twitter. Blank check. So it would be like blank check presents or blank check, colon, a new podcast. Blank Check, right. Yes. That was my idea. Right. I pitched it to you on Twitter. Blank Check. So it'd be like Blank Check presents or Blank Check colon a new podcast. Blank Check. And every time we did a new miniseries, the artwork would change. Sure. Great Photoshop. Everything else you love.

I suggest Blank Check with Griffin and David. Yeah, that's what it'd be. It'd be Blank Check with Griffin and David. Let's just make it longer. A movie podcast. Right. Produced by Ben Hosley. Yes.

Produced by Ben Hosley. A Ben Hosley joint. Yeah. Oh, yes. Definitely a joint. If you guys think that's a good idea, you should tell us. You should remember that that would make more work for Ben. So that's like a positive. Yeah. That's a Mr. Positive. That's a Mr. Positive. He's loving it. He's so excited. He's licking his lips. He's licking his

red face. Go on. Go on. Negative. I don't know. Maybe you guys love the name Griffin and David present. I don't know. If you've really come to know and love it and you're afraid of change, let us know. It's something we're debating right now. Positive, it's similar to the title of a Disney movie that starred Tone Loke

that I was a big fan of in 1994. Isn't what's his name in it too? Mel Ferrer? Miguel Ferrer? Yeah, isn't he in it too? Mel Ferrer? Miguel Ferrer? Yeah, isn't he in it? He might be. Let's find out. I might be confusing him with someone. Yeah, Miguel Ferrer.

You've got James Rebhorn. One of the greats. You've got Jane Atkinson. She played the vice president in a TV show once, I think. And you've got Brian Bonsall. I happen to love that movie. Do you like that movie? Yeah. My happen to love that movie. That's the 12-year-old. Do you like that movie? Yeah.

My big thing with that movie was I've never been more excited to see a movie when I was at that age. I saw the trailer and I was like, oh my God, he gets a million dollars? It's maybe the best premise of all time. And buys toys? Yeah. And then we went to see it and it was sold out at the AMC 84th Street Lowe's or whatever it was called back then.

And instead we went to see Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. It's okay. Which is better. I disagree. That was like my favorite movie. This is not the time for this argument. We have a lot of business to get to. But please email us at Griffin and David Present.

Yep, at Gmail. At Gmail. At gmail.com. Or tweet at us. Let us know what you think about the name branding. Additional offer I'm putting on the table. I'm going to regret this. But I have a lot of ComTech chips left over.

Oh, my God. So if you want to email griffindaypresent at gmail.com, I'm going to send out Grifmas cards. And the first, whatever it is, like 30 people to email me, I'll send you a ComTech chip as a Christmas present. There you go. So this is already something I know I'm going to be stressed out about in two weeks. But email us, griffindaypresent.

Ask for, you can't make requests. I'll send you a ComTech chip. Yeah, you'll just get one. Yeah, but you have to in your email tell us what you think about, should we be griffindaypresent going forward or blank check with griffindaypresent? Or just, yeah, whatever. Okay, I'm going to read the opening crawl. Can I say something first before you do?

What? I don't know if I'm crazy here, okay? Oh my God. I don't know if I'm crazy here. But? We've been going mad doing this thing. I don't know if my whole perspective is so skewed. My knee-jerk reaction to watching this movie,

I think it's the best one yet. I think it might be number one. But I'm right about this. I know, because usually we're, you know, it's like our order agreed. I think it might be number one. But I'm right about this. I know, because usually it's like our order agreed. I think we agree our order is one, two, three. Right? Yeah. But now is it four, one, two, three? It is. What?

I'm not wrong, right? This is the best one yet? It's the best one yet. Okay, let's read The Crawl. Because The Crawl, this movie starts out awesome. It is a period of civil war. Cool. I mean, it's true. It's a period of civil war. Not. I mean, it's true. It's a period of civil war. Not trade routes are blocked by- Rebel spaceships striking from a hidden base.

Striking, motherfucker. Have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire. Not a stalemate. They're winning. It's back and forth. First thing we would associate with the original movies, the Galactic Empire. That's the thing the Emperor created at the end of Revenge of the Sith. So we're jumping ahead 20 years. This is such a powerful force that it's been like 20 years of battle against The Galactic Empire. That's the thing the Emperor created at the end of Revenge of the Sith. So we're jumping ahead 20 years.

This is such a powerful force that it's been like 20 years of battle against the Galactic Empire. During the battle, rebel spies managed to steal secret plans to the Empire's ultimate weapon, the Death Star. Cool!

That's that fucking shit that they had on the 3D blueprints. That's cool. An armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet. What? Blow up a whole planet. Nuts.

Pursued by the Empire's sinister agents, Princess Leia. Ooh. That name's familiar. Interesting. Races home aboard her starship, custodian of the stolen plans that can save her people and restore freedom to the galaxy. I mean, that's exciting. Star Wars, and it's episode four, A New Hope.

That's exciting, and it's also, it's tight. You know what I'm saying? It's perfectly tight. You had to read them five times to understand everything that was going on. This is just like, there's a war. It's been going on. The rebels are making progress, but it's... Yeah, they've won of their

first victory. So it's been a slow progress, slow process, but now they are finally getting some damage done. Can I make one point right off the bat? Yeah. It is confounding that if you're watching this movie, as one would,

a direct sequel to Revenge of the Sith... Yeah, 1, 2, 3, 4. Yeah, it's like what comes after 3, 4. How much less sense this makes with the forming of the Rebel Alliance scenes that George cut out of the last movie? Oh, you're saying you want those deleted scenes just to know that the Rebel Alliance is going to be created? I think it's as a clear through line.

No, no, look, look. I'm actually, because you were prepping me. You were like, I've got some things to say before this podcast. Come on. Oh, I'm not done with things

I have to say. Come on. No, no, but I'm not saying the movie is, I'm not, this is not the fault of this movie. It's the fault of Revenge of the Sith, right?

Yes. I can hear someone go, hey, there's a Rebel Alliance, and not go, wait, but where did it come from? I'll accept it. Right. And I mean, there's going to be rebellion, of course. Yeah. But don't you think there is more added power to knowing that the rebel alliance we're seeing at the beginning of this movie is like the full tree that grew out of the seeds planted by Padme. By Bail Organa. You know, I'm going to disagree with you. You know why?

Why? It's pretty quickly established without us having to see those scenes. Two reasons. Number one, what's the first thing we see in this movie? The first thing. Fucking Smith ship. Smith ship. Straight boom.

This movie is killing it. It's so good. It glides over the camera. It's getting attacked by a big empire ship. What's the second thing? Like the hero, the first hero we meet in this movie. C-3PO, R2-D2 motherfucker? Well, that's not what I was thinking of.

But yeah, yeah. I was thinking of Leia. You know, you got Leia. We do see C-3PO and R2-D2 first. We'll talk about Leia. We'll go back to C-3PO and R2-D2. Organa, he adopts Leia, the daughter of Padme. Princess Leia, Organa.

I guess he, was he a king? Why is she a princess? He was a senator. Is he also a king? I don't know. Whatever, not explained. Yeah. He's got her, he's raised her to, you know, she's like 19, 20 years old now. Yeah.

And she's like a fucking rebel captain. We get it. But she's like- On the Smith ship. She's incredible because she- This is so good, by the way. Oh get it. On the Smith ship. She's incredible because she This is so good by the way. This movie is so fucking good David. This is why I didn't

want to do 10 episodes because it's just gonna be us. This is good. It's a good movie. You have a piece of cotton right on your eye lashes. I think it's a you know. No because it's like pink. Oh pink cotton. It looks like you still have it. It looks like a nerd. It looks like a candy nerd on your eyebrow. God, I used to eat so many

nerds. It's right here. I know, I'm putting on the, oh yeah, I see. It's like orange. Alright, I'll cut this out. No, keep that in. Keep that in. Okay. Oh God, I don't even know what to fucking talk about first. Okay, so Leia Organa, daughter of Bail Organa.

Right, but we knowail Organa. Right. But we know, we know. We know that right off the bat. No, but we know, because we've seen one, two, and three. Right. That this girl is the daughter of Darth Vader. Right. Yeah. Okay.

Who comes into this ship? Darth motherfucking Vader. There's like a big battle. The ship gets like dragged into this other, into this like empire ship. Yeah. This big ship. And they blow open the door and a lot of guys in white, kind of like clone troopers, but not CGI. No CGI in this movie, by the way. No, there's some CGI. We'll get to it. There's some CGI, David. Don't say that. We're watching the Blu-ray versions, by the way, guys, just so

you know that. Yeah, here's the thing. It turns out those other discs in the set were movies. Yeah, they're on the Blu-ray. They were in our collections. We thought they were all special features. They're movies. They're whole movies. We thought they were like fan fiction.

Yeah. I'm going to eat a peanut. See, this is what I'm saying. Darth Vader walks in. He's the boss man. He's the boss man. James Earl Jones is voicing him. Yeah.

He looks incredible. A lot bigger than the last time we saw him. Yeah, he's big. The suit's exactly the same. Yeah. But he's larger. It's not like, oh, Hayden beefed up. A little more imposing, yeah.

He's taller. Yeah. Yeah. And he immediately is like, Leia. He's not letting on that that's his daughter. No. Well, he doesn't know. He doesn't know.

Because he wasn't there. Because he wasn't there. I think he thinks they died. That's a daughter. No. Well, he doesn't know. He doesn't know. Because he wasn't there. He wasn't present. Because he wasn't there. That's a good point. I think he thinks they died. That's a good point. Because the emperor told him your kids died. That's a good point.

Yeah. Bummer. Bummer. So, I mean, that's what I like. There's this delicious irony. Yeah. Present from the very first scene. Yeah.

Vader's interrogating Leia being like, you're rebels. I know you're rebels. You've stolen these plans and she's like what are you talking about, I'm a diplomat this is a peaceful mission, how dare you which is like a little ballsy of her because they did just like mow down her entire security force, like you know

come on, she could have just at least admit it Yeah but already in this first scene Leia is acting the way we wanted Padme to act across three movies. Yeah, I don't want to beef with Padme, Padme's fine. I don't either Padme's fine, but Leia is acting the way we wanted Padme to act across three movies. Yeah. I don't want to beef with Padme. Padme's fine. I don't either. Padme's fine, but Leia is like Padme plus. Yeah. You know? Yeah. Leia's got a ton of

agency, right? And she's fucking doing shit. We don't even see Smith. Yeah. Smith is not in this movie at all. And it's not like, oh, there's someone else playing Bail Organa. Not in the film. There's an older Organa. Right. Smith would have been 18 years old when this movie,

17 years old when this movie was shot, which is kind of crazy. He's a fucking old guy. He's an old guy. Wow, geez. But she's like really working the system.

Ben didn't like that. No, and I like that. See, I'm not criticizing the movie for this, but I like, I mean, it's tough because I have the scenes in my head,

so I still can track them all. Yeah. But I like the idea that it's like her biological mother and her adoptive father started this thing, and now she's on the front lines, like continuing the battle. Wrapped up in it. You know? Yeah. But I think we skipped over some important stuff.

Well, we skipped over R2 and- Right, because this movie- The movie opens with them. This movie opens with the Smith ship. It looks great. Yeah. And we see our old friends, R2-D2 and C-3PO- They're in the

ship walking through it getting blasted you almost forgot to mention there's a tc14 there's a fucking silver protocol droid right behind c3 i don't believe fine as hell yeah looks fine as i don't believe it talks but uh it's there which means it might be tc14 look you know i mean you've been telling me that she's dead dav David, but it might be her. If it looks like TC-14, and it walks like TC-14, and it smells like TC-14, and we don't hear her voice,

then I'm going to assume that my lovely sweetie pie, TC-14, is back alive, riding the smith ship, just where I want her. Boy, oh boy. Not to say that she has to be where I want her. She can do whatever she wants, because she's her own woman.

Yeah. Well, she's a robot, but yeah. But it's a cool place to see her be. Yes, all droids. The last time we saw C-3PO and RGD-2. Was on that very ship. Yes. And Bail Organa.

And Smits is like, I'm just going to call him Smits. I'm sorry. Sure. It's just like, yeah, wipe the protocol droids memory. Okay, so C-3PO and RGD-2 have presumably been on the ship for 20 years, right? I guess so. I mean, maybe they've been getting off at Alderaan where he lives or whatever, hanging out. Okay, but this seems to be their main base of operation.

But, you know, they say that their guy is Captain Antilles. Yeah. Yeah, what the fuck is that? Captain Antilles is the dude who Organa orders to wipe the memory. Right, he's the sort of, yeah, I know who he is. Yeah, he's like wipe their memory. But R2-D2 remembers everything. He does.

Okay. But he can't tell anyone about it. Well, because most people can't understand him. You know who can understand him? C-3PO. Right. And for 20 years, R2-D2 just hasn't been telling C-3PO shit. I guess so.

Or maybe he's been like referring to it in 3PO, who's a kind of a self-involved dude. We should acknowledge. It's true. Sometimes he doesn't listen. He's just kind of been like, what? What are you talking about? You know guess so. Or maybe he's been like referring to it in 3PO who's a kind of a self involved dude. It's true. Sometimes he doesn't listen. Has just kind of been like what? What are you talking about? You know so. But C-3PO seems astonished by everything that happens in this movie as if there's no precedent. It's true. Well his mind was wiped. R2-D2's been around the block and R2-D2's just being like I don't know. I'm not going to call

George R. R. Lucas George Lucas a master storyteller but he wiped his mind in the third movie. Great move George. It explains everything. So... Smith's just casually like, yeah, wipe his mind. So... So. R2-D2, who we in the past have argued is kind of a little brat.

Yeah, kind of a brat, kind of a sort of weird appendage to the story that doesn't seem like that important. In this movie, A, they really kind of function as the audience surrogate characters we're introduced to them and it's like okay here's a ship the rebels are running a lot of stuff is happening around them the empire is about to board it doesn't have to be explained to us there's

gonna be a big shootout because it's like we're seeing it through their eyes and they're like i don't know what's going on yeah and also you should like the visual storytelling is so much cleaner it's like so clean you've got leia she's in white she's wearing a white robe she's very clearly the heroine here yeah vader comes and he's all in black he's like this like dark menacing figure it's like the simplest kind of storytelling but it's like extremely effective we get what's going on there's also a lot of silence like it it feels very reminiscent of the jendy tarantakovsky all right clone war series no but you know what i'm saying like he has these beats i mean

johnny williams is back in the music's as great as ever yeah but i was surprised watching it how selectively he uses it because there are long sequences where it's just the sound effects a blaster's going off great ships moving Or literally just dead silence to build a sense of anticipation and dread and tension. There's also a lot less dialogue. Yeah, there is. I mean, there's moments of kind of clunky expositional dialogue. It happens. He's not a subtle filmmaker.

No. But he doesn't need to be. If you're doing powerful storytelling, you can paint with a large brush and still paint a masterpiece. Now, I feel like we need to get out of this scene because we only have one episode. No, but there's stuff I need to establish. Because Leia puts the plans on R2, we should say that. R2 becomes kind of the, like, the story. Like, literally the story is put in R2 for him to sort of carry it around the whole movie.

But I want to say this. I know you are afraid that we're focusing too much on one scene because we're only doing this one episode. We're definitely focusing way too much on one scene. No, but this is something that I want to comment on that affects the rest of the movie. It took them four movies. They finally got the dynamic between R2-D2 and C-3PO down. Oh, this is your point.

Right. Okay. Well, it's in all the scenes, I would say. Yeah, well, that's why I said I want to establish it here because then it continues for the rest of the movie. It definitely continues for the rest of the movie. The first 17 minutes of the movie, we're just sticking with C-3PO and R2-D2, really. Yeah, Leia and Vader in the background. And we're sort of seeing them from the droid's perspective. Yeah, a little bit.

Especially Leia. Right, but they're sort of on the ship. They don't know what they're doing. They were just sort of like employees. Now the ship is coming under attack. Yeah, but R2 knows what he's doing. Well, this is what's great. Okay, R2 in this one is a brat, but it's kind of funny. Yeah, because he's like, come on, we gotta get in here. You just get that he's doing

that. He's kind of bum-rushing C-3PO around and C-3PO's like, what are you, why are we doing any of this? C-3PO's like, why don't you come back here? And R2-D2's just like hitting buttons and changing things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he shoots him out in a little escape pod. It's funny because R2-D2 seems like the less powerful one physically, but you know that he knows everything. Yeah.

And C-3PO's an idiot because he had his mind wiped. Yeah. Which means he's essentially... He's not... I wouldn't call him physically powerful. No, but R2-D2, like... No, I get you. He's like a trash can.

Yeah, but he's a little more durable. Sure. Yeah. I just like this dynamic a lot. I think it's funny, and I like... It finally makes sense why they're in these movies,

not just because R2-D2 functions as such an important story point because the MacGuffin is in his tummy. Yeah, right, right, right. But also... In his tummy. It's in his robot tummy. It's in his tummy. Yeah, right, right, right. But also, it's in his robot tummy. It's in his tummy. But also because, like, they're a really good vantage point for us to understand this war that's so much bigger than us.

So, Darth Vader, Princess Leia, he captures her. He captures Leia. Leia is kind of a prisoner for a good half of this movie. But before she does that, she goes to R2-D2, she goes in a corridor, she pushes some buttons. Yeah, she puts a little disk drive, like a big floppy disk in his tummy. C3Pos says, where are you? Follow out. R2D2 pushes some things. C3Pos says,

what are you talking about? You don't need to narrate the whole movie. Escape pod. Yeah. They zap out in an escape pod. Where does it land? Tatooine. Tatooine. Yeah. And there's a great moment I love where it cuts to two guys at the control panel of the Empire the empire ship yeah and they go uh what's that they're empty they go no organic life in there no signs of organic life

must have been an error so it's just like idiots right which like actually is like an abominable mistake this is a world where droids do shit all the time they have a lot of power yeah but they don't know i mean, we have rarely... In the last three films, what's the strongest thing we've seen a droid do? Like, droids seem very subservient. No, I know, but still,

it could be programmed. But maybe this... No, there's droids everywhere. They're stupid. This might be a turning point. You know what I'm saying? Maybe. Like, the Asimov,

like, the three rules. We're gonna move on. They land on Tatooine. There's, like, ten minutes. No, I agree with you. There's not that much dialogue. I mean, C-3PO's complaining a lot, but it's not expositional. It's kind of humorous character development.

Let's compare this to The Phantom Menace. Yeah. In The Phantom Menace, it's like they're in there. It's a similar kind of situation. They're leaving the war, and they have to crash land on Tatooine. Yeah. How is Tatooine introduced? It's like, let's land there.

Well, we can't land there. It's controlled by the Hutts. The Hutts are gangsters. We could never like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Is that illegal? Yeah. Oh my God. This movie, it's like they land on Tatooine.

What do we get? A lot of scenes of the droids wandering through this like kind of blasted, you know, sandy. Well, this is the best thing about this movie. It's like every 10 minutes. I mean, for once george is like all that like the fucking drawing he does about like adventure serials and cliffhangers and that being his inspiration it's like every 10 minutes there's a new super clear objective yes and it's like get from point a to point yeah and there's a new element like that right it helps you

understand the the environment you add a new character you have R2 and 3PO stuck in the desert. Uh-oh. They part ways, which is- Because they're fighting. But it's a good character. 3PO's pretty crazy to abandon him. He's like, let's go this way into nothing. But on the other hand, R2 pushed him into an escape pod.

I think C-3PO doesn't have the perspective to see that that was the right thing to do. Yeah. Well, anyway. Yeah. They're on this desert. And then, so we see R2 for a while on to do. Yeah, well, anyway. Yeah. They're on this desert, and then, so we see R2 for a while on his own.

This movie successfully tells the story of this voiceless droid. Five minutes of him just rolling in the desert. Just, like, making worried noises, basically.

And it's, like, real desert, David. Yeah, it's shot in Tunisia, where they shoot the Tatooine stuff. Yeah. You got these great, like, Rocky,

and then these little Jawa people, these little hooded, sort of monk-like, you know, bandits. I don't know what they are. Very weird. Speaking gibberish. Yeah.

Like is there a whole is there a whole like economy based on like hopefully a droid crash lands on this shit planet? Yeah. It's weird. They like kind of kidnap him. Yeah. It's like they're the equivalent of like, you know, of recycling can collectors. Yeah, exactly. It's like, let's just roam around and go through the garbage and find all the cans that people don't want,

except the cans are droids, because in this world there are too many droids. And so they get put on this ship, R2 first, 3PO eventually gets picked up by these guys. Great ship. It's like a big wheeled- It's called a sand crawler. It looks so cool. It looks like a sort of wedge of cheese. And there's that great shot where R2, you see from R2's perspective, the little sand crawler off in the distance, and it looks like a sort of, yeah, wedge of cheese. And there's that great shot where R2, like you see from R2's perspective, the little sand crawler

off in the distance and it just gets bigger and bigger, closer, closer, moving slowly and slowly. And the same with Threepio. He sees and he's like,

oh yay, you found me. Let's talk about the lack of CGI in these scenes when he is in the droid, you know, this kind of like, it's almost like

they're all slaves. Like, you know, they're kind of being processed and there's all these weird droids around. There's all this physical stuff. We're going to talk about this a lot. There's a viscerality to it. Come on, Ben, right?

Oh, no. I mean, it's gorgeous. It's really amazing. You get totally immersed into the world. You ever hear fucking Mr. Positive be that positive about anything? He's so positive. I mean, I love this movie. It's a great movie.

Our levels are off the charts because we're so excited. We're too excited. We're all screaming, but that's okay because it's worth it. So, yeah. And then, even though it's very contrived, like it's contrived that they're above Tatooine at the right moment. It's contrived that they get picked up by the same thing. It's contrived that they get randomly sold to Luke Skywalker.

That's right. Luke Skywalker. But it all happens. No sold to Luke Skywalker. That's right. Luke Skywalker. But it all happens. No, we're ready. We're ready. Well, this is the thing I want to say about how it's contrived. It's like a story structure, a plotting that I think is very similar to that of the Toy Story movies. Obviously, it was not influenced by it.

It came before it. Whatever. But the thing I like in the toy story movies is it's like an incredible they're my favorite movies but it's an incredible amount of like luck and happenstance but it fits together so perfectly that you accept it yeah of course exactly and it's also always and you want it to happen something lucky happens and the characters think the next lucky thing is going to happen and then it goes wrong yeah and then they have to solve that problem and another lucky thing happens and then it goes wrong. Yeah. And then they have to solve that problem, and then another lucky thing happens, and then it goes wrong.

It's like really, it's serialized storytelling. I mean, it's like, it feels like old adventure series. Right, which this was partly inspired by. Right. How do we get from point A to point B? How do we get across this desert? Well, now we're stuck in the sand crawler. So the sand crawler.

Oh, it turns out the sand crawler brings us to the place that we should be. We're fated to end up. Here's the thing. Luke kind of, I mean, sorry, R2 kind of knows they need to be with Luke. Mm-hmm. 3PO is just kind of like, well, I guess this is my life,

which I enjoy. Yeah. He's like, you know, one minute I'm on a spaceship, the next minute I'm a bit of moisture farmers on this weird planet. Well, so Sancrella comes up.

They're selling the droids. They get sold to... Luke and Uncle Owen. Uncle Owen. Older. Who's creating this? Yeah, yeah. Oh, he's soer. Who's creating this? Yeah. Oh, he's so good.

He's listing the things they need. I'm looking up the actor because I forget the actor's name. They're listing the things they need and we're like this and that and the Jawas go like... And they point to C-3PO and he's like, okay, what's your deal? And he's like, well, I made protocol. There's that great moment where he just goes, okay, enough.

No, I also like that they try to sell him another R2. It's like an R4 or something. It's a red R2. Yeah. And he's like, yeah, fine. And it blows up. And he's like, come on, what are you trying to do to me? He's haggling with them.

Right. And then CQP goes like, well, if you don't mind me saying, that R2 unit there. Right, right. He's like, fine, that one. Here's the best thing about this. I just want to point out. Yeah, sure. No racial stereotyping happens.

Okay, this is a huge thing. It's amazing. You did a whole scene with merchants and not one racial stereotype. But can I point out something humongous in this movie? Yeah, sure. There are a ton of aliens in this film. Yeah. None of them speak-

Phil Brown, who plays Uncle. None of them speak in English. Yeah, it's true. Okay, so throughout the three films in the original trilogy. Only humans speak English. Right. Sometimes humans can understand the aliens and relay their. Sometimes they can't.

Yeah, it's true. That's true. This is huge. I never fucking thought of that. This is huge. That is actually crazy. It's humongous. David's freaking out right now. That's true This is huge How have I never fucking thought of that? This is huge That is actually crazy It's humongous David's freaking out right now

That's so true I figured that out and I've been holding that one under the table Because you've got like In the prequels you've got like Dexter Jetster You've got you know I mean I'm trying to think of other examples There's lots of Everyone

The Neimoidians Jar Jar Jar Jar yeah All these guys speaking like this sort of Hackneyed English And all of Is there any Yoda speaks English Yoda

There's a couple Is the one Yeah But he's coming later Yeah yeah yeah But like There must be a couple But mostly

They speak their own language Right Coming up We have a species Who have since Sort of been rewritten To be dubbed The Tusken Raiders

But in this movie They're sand people They're sand people. You look at the way they dress and their weaponry and everything, and you're like, okay, this is kind of like an old Middle Eastern stereotype. Oh, sure, yeah, they're Bedouins. But the fact that they don't speak helps. A hundred percent.

And the same with the Jawas, of course, because the Jawas are these measly little merchant people. You could do a lot of things with that, but no, they're just like. If they were speaking in any language we understood, and he also additionally hired actors to replicate voices that are tied to cultural stereotypes that link up with the way they're dressed and what their professions are?

This kind of helps explain why the Empire is so human, too. Mm-hmm. Why there aren't really, we don't really see aliens employed by the Empire. None. It's crazy. Fascinating. Yeah, it is fascinating. Legitimately fascinating. So the Jawas just end up being interesting.

Yeah, yeah, I know. They end up being texture. If they were talking, we'd probably be annoyed by them or offended by them, you know? But this movie does a really good job of because the objectives are so clear in every scene. How does C-3PO and RTG2 get across the desert? They're trying to make it through.

Oh, no, they're captured by Jawas. Oh, no, it turns out that that actually brought them to where they needed to be. All the things that are happening in the background, all these sort of background details, there's a great shot when they're in the desert of, like, a long, long skeleton of, like, a snake. Right. And you're just like, oh, man, what does this tell me?

This tells me there are species on this planet that I can't even fathom. That you're just like, oh man, what does this tell me? Yeah. This tells me there are species on this planet that I can't even fathom. That looks like something we've seen before but a size that is so insane. That creature looks terrifying and the conditions here

are so harsh that this thing couldn't survive. Yeah. How does C-3PO and R2-D2 expect to survive? Oh, they're kidnapped. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh no, now it's going to be about them being kidnapped. No, because they're bought. Who are they bought by? The hero of our movie That's why I'm moving on here 35 minutes

That's a transition Luke motherfucking Skywalker Son of Anakin Skywalker A.K.A. Darth Vader Uncle Owen Bides the droids Little whiny though You know I mean that part was a little bit of a turn off But then I kind of warmed up to him Uncle Owen buys the droids, bring him back. A little whiny though when you first meet him. Played by Mark Hamill. Definitely.

You know, I mean, that part was a little bit of a turn off, but then I kind of warmed up to him as the movie went on. We get the idea. His first like three opening line readings

are really tough. Yeah. But I want to go to Toshi to buy power converters. Right, yeah. Like that's actually what his dream is. That's how he sounds.

But he's a restless soul. He lives in Tatooine, which we know is like, a great character, yeah. Which we know is this pretty boring place. He's a moisture farmer. He lives in Tatooine, which we know is this pretty boring place. He's a moisture farmer. Pretty nice house. Yes.

Upgrade from Anakin's house. Yeah. It's like a big pit in the ground. Beru, Emperor is still there. Yeah. And he's just itching to join the Empire. He wants to get out of there. No, not the Empire.

The rebel. No. He wants to join the Empire. He wants to be a fighter pilot. Yeah, he wants to be a fighter pilot. Doesn't he want to join the Empire? He wants to take the test and join the Empire. Maybe Rebel. No. He wants to join the Empire. He wants to be a fighter pilot. Yeah, he wants to be a fighter pilot. Doesn't he want to join the Empire? He wants to take the test and join the Empire. Maybe not.

I guess you're right. I don't know if he says the word. I thought he wanted to go to university. That's what I remember. He wants to leave. He wants to leave. I can't remember. This is interesting.

All three of us had different interpretations. It doesn't matter. He wants to leave, and he wants to fly, and he also mentions about taking the test. And his uncle is saying, like, yeah, taking a test. Yeah. Yeah. His uncle is saying, like, one more season. And it's very clear that he's been stalling for time, kind of keeping his parentage from him. Yeah.

And, yeah. And you know what I like about this? One, it is relatable. Yeah, of course. It is something that almost everyone could relate to. There's a scene early on where he looks out at the two sons like Beru and Owen did at the end end of it's it's a mirroring of the shot at the end of revenge of the sith yeah and like yeah you get it all just from that there's no dialogue just music right it's like the entire like thesis of the movie not the thesis but the mission statement of the movie in one shot is like this movie is about this feeling that anyone can relate to of just thinking that there's something bigger out there for you.

That your future could hold something more exciting than you can think of. That life could give you a little more. And it's shown through that feeling that all of us can like relate to. Just looking out at the sun and just wondering. Except he's got two sons. And it's like this is the story you know in a world you don't. This is a long time ago, motherfucker. In a galaxy far, far away.

But guess what. They're feeling the same things that you are and they're not feeling it by going like Padme my heart is breaking. I love you so much. Like that scene with

Uncle Owen isn't him going like now Luke you know I've been stalling for time and not letting you join the Academy because I'm worried about you because your father got killed.

All right. You know. I do know. Is it masterful dialogue. No. No it's not. I was going to say because then there's

that bit where brew's like he wants to leave and he's like i know and they mentioned his father very darkly yes very briefly and very darkly right anyway just to pick things up r2 shows this message of princess leia lucas like cleaning him out just to pick things up people have seen the movie right no have't know. Have they? We didn't even know it existed. And this very little tiny image of Leia transfixes him so much. It's a hologram. He goes, who is that?

Which is another weird parallel because he seems like he's kind of into this thing. Yeah, and let's just we all know. We should just talk about this. They're brother and sister. Yeah, they're brother and sister. They don't figure it out. We all know that because this is the fourth movie. It's weird the way he structures this. It's weird. Anyway, and so he goes out.

She's saying, help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope. It's in a loop, and they can't get the rest of it to play. It's like stuck at the end of the message. Right. And he's like, Obi-Wan Kenobi, never heard of him. She might mean old Ben Kenobi. Ooh, that guy whose name is only four letters off from the other name I heard.

So let's drive over, see Obi-Wan Kenobi. There's a chance. They go over to see Obi-Wan Kenobi. They tussle with some sand people. Yes, the Tusken Raiders kind, yeah. And Obi-Wan scares them off. He does a howl. And here he is, Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Played by? Alec Guinness. One of the greatest actors of all time. Correct. In an Oscar-nominated performance. Yeah. By the way, these test films were nominated for a lot of Oscars. Like 10 actually.

Yeah. Hugely successful. Yeah. Picture, director, screenplay. Yeah. It won like six Oscars. Supporting actor. Yeah.

Not to mention all the below the line categories. Yeah. Yeah. Astonishing. Alec Guinness plays Obi-Wan Kenobi. Yeah. I gotta say, I'm just going to say it, he's a lot better than Ewan Frederick. He is.

Right? Absolutely. And I don't want to blame Ewan for it. No, I'm gonna blame him. The character's also better at this point. Yeah, well, he's like this sort of old soul, you know, busted up in the desert, kind of waiting for Luke to grow up, I guess, is the idea. Yeah, he's like been living nearby, because Luke doesn't seem to know him that well.

He goes like, there is a guy named Old Ben Coat, isn't like, oh, Ben, I hang out with him all the idea. Yeah, he's like been living nearby. Because Luke doesn't seem to know him that well. He goes like, there is a guy named Old Ben. Oh, Ben, I hang out with him all the time. But it does seem like... Yeah, and Owen calls him a crazy old wizard. Right. Well, because he probably knows that like... Jedi. Yeah, and he's going to try to get Luke in there.

He knows that Luke probably has the Force, you know? Yeah. But so Obi-Wan just seems like maybe he's been keeping eyes on Luke from a distance. Yeah, yeah, yeah. As he said he would in the third movie. And Obi-Wan just seems like maybe he's been keeping eyes on Luke from a distance. As he said he would in the third movie. And Obi-Wan, which I appreciate, really gets down to business. He just like in about five minutes, he's like, here's the deal. I'm a Jedi.

Your dad was a Jedi. Here's his lightsaber. You should try it out. I trained him. We got to go. He's the best fighter pilot. He died. They watch the message.

It's Leia saying I need your help You were an ally of my father's I have these plans Death Star plans Give it to the Rebel Alliance And Obi-Wan's just like Yo Luke I'm pretty old

You gotta come with me I need your help And gives him the lightsaber Gives him this lightsaber It's Anakin's old lightsaber The blue lightsaber And they go to check in On Luke's parents lightsaber. Gives him this lightsaber. It's Anakin's old lightsaber. His dad's old lightsaber. The blue lightsaber. And they go to check in on Luke's parents.

I mean, Luke's uncle. Before that, there are a couple things I want to just address within this scene. One is that Obi-Wan barely acknowledges R2, D2, and C3PO. It's true. Two guys he hung out with a lot a couple decades ago. Especially R2. Although R5 or R4 was his guy.

Was his main guy. But he's still, it's true. But R2's like a... He could be a little nice about it. At the end of the day, R2 was like, at the very least, a friend of a friend. Like a very close friend. Like, oh, back in the 90s, we did used to hang out a lot because we had that friend in common who was this guy's dad.

And he just kind of like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they said, these droids are here to see you. And he goes, these droids? I never owned a droid. And it's like, motherfucker, you owned like a lot of droids are here to see you. And he goes, these droids? I never owned a droid. And it's like, motherfucker, you own like a lot of droids. First off, bitch, you owned a lot of droids. You were a Jedi master.

Second of all, these guys are part of your crew. Also, the Jedi seem to be myth almost, which is fucking weird because it's only 19 years old. But when they talk about the force, it's like, I don't know if I believe in Christianity. It's like a religion. There's no tactile proof that it exists. We should mention, I'm sorry, cross-cutting with all this, is Vader with the Empire, with Grand Moff Tarkin, who we glimpsed in episode three.

Here he's played by legendary horror actor Peter Cushing. Killing it. So good. Pulling a Christopher Lee-style performance. And he's saying to Leia, you're going to give us your plans. Leia's getting tortured. All that's happening. There's this great droid.

They sent in a bald droid with needles and stuff on it. Very cool. A little over the top because it just has a needle on it, but whatever. But there's a scene, I don't know if it comes before or after this, but it's right around here, where Darth Vader's in his conference room. And I love the Empire. I mean, talking about using clear visual language to establish, like, you know.

It's mythic storytelling. It's very broad. But these guys are like, it's very Nazi-ish. Yeah. No, I think that's very obvious. Yes these guys are like, it's very Nazi-ish. Yeah. No, I think that's very obvious, right? It's like the design of the ships, their uniforms, they're all human. They're all humans. They're all British, but have these very sort of clean looks, you know?

But it is this, like, they have this air to them, this, like, elitist air to them. This movie was mostly shot in Britain. Yeah. And he's in the room, and he, like, mentions something about the Force, and they go, like, oh, don't throw your religion at me. Yeah, no, Vader's like, yeah, you know, I feel a disturbance or whatever. And they're like, oh God. God, you in this like mumbo-

Vader really sticks out. Because the Emperor's not in this movie. Yeah. So it's really just these, you know, it's, it's, uh, Tarkin and then these entire functionaries. Bunch of old white British dudes in uniforms. And they are just like this fucking space wizard weirdo. Well, it's like if your boss goes like, OK, so our quarter reports were a little down. So let's pass some crystals out if you want to rub them.

And they're like, you and your crystal bullshit. We don't believe in crystal bullshit. Don't fucking Bob. It would be like that. But then he used the crystal to strangle one. Exactly. Yeah. Like using magical crystal powers.

Fucking Anakin Skywalker, the master of choking. This one guy's going like, blah, blah, blah, force. And fucking Darth V holds out his hand and starts choking the guy from across the room. And everyone's like, oh, fuck. But the one thing I like is Tarkin's like, all right. Vader, give it a rest. Vader's like, as you wish. Anyway.

So that's happening over there. But Vader's definitely still a lackey. We don't see the Emperor. But he inspires a lot of fear. Yes. Yeah. But he's like, like a lackey. You know we don't see the Emperor but like But he inspires a lot of fear. Yes. Yeah. But he's like maybe

like he's not Blofeld he's like the main henchman in the Bond movie. I guess so. It feels a little bit like to me. In a way I like.

He's I don't know. He operates in a weird sort of position. He operates in a weird position. Tarkin is kind of in charge. He's in charge of this

Death Star which is this battle station that they have built. He's the Grand Moff. He's in charge of this Death Star, which is this battle station that they have built. He's the Grand Moff. He's the Grand Moff. Yeah. That's from We All Know. And when he is torturing, well, we'll get to that.

Anyway, so we should just say Luke gets off the, people have seen the movie. Luke. I really, I wouldn't get on it, David. We consider ourselves huge Star Wars fans. The Empire traces the droids back to Luke's homestead and kill Owen and Beru. Pretty sad. They melt them into

skeletons. They're red skeletons. It's kind of crazy. It's pretty traumatic in a good way. It doesn't seem very traumatic because Luke just keeps carrying on with his regular business. Nothing else to do except go with you. It's another one of those coincidences. George Lucas was a big student

of Joseph Campbell and the hero's journey. And a lot of people have taken from it and like tried to replicate it to the same results he got in this film where it works beautifully. Yeah, he refuses at first. Obi-Wan's like you gotta come with me. He's like I can't do that. I know, yeah. A lot of movies make their entire

second act refusal of the call. So refusal of the call is 90 seconds in this movie. Well, and it should be because Refusal of the Call is really annoying because we know what's going to happen. We know. Don't beat around the bush. But Obi-Wan throws all this information at him.

He's like, I can't do that. It's true. It's overwhelming. Yeah. Goes back to see his aunt and uncle. They're dead. And realizes, I have no home anymore. I want to get to my favorite.

My role has changed. Then my favorite part of the movie. Is it your favorite character? Yeah, well, Han Solo's my favorite character. This guy rules. Yeah, for sure. But I'm not even just talking about him. Okay.

This whole section, they fly up to Mos Eisley. Yeah. In the speeder. Not Mos Espa, but very similar. Yeah, yeah. It's pretty much the same. It's bigger. It's bigger.

Bigger, but looks a lot like the place where Anakin got. They're looking at it, and Obi-Wan's just like, the fucking worst place. He's just like, Luke, this place fucking sucks. Everyone here sucks. Scum of hive and villainy. And so, yeah, you just get the idea, like, no one in here should be fucked with.

And there's also the moment where they come in. They come in on the speeder. Stormtrooper does like a stop by. And Obi-Wan shows off his force powers by saying these aren't the droids you're looking for. He's like oh these aren't

the droids you're looking for. Which is like Luke doesn't still even really know what the force is what being a Jedi is and here's a little hint. This is a movie after seeing like so much

flubbering and bullshit like that. No flubbering in this movie. The Jedi is I don't know if it's because he's been living in seclusion because he's wanted to keep his powers under lock and key for this long

because he doesn't want anyone to know he's a Jedi. He's almost delighted. But it's just little touches. He uses his powers very sparingly and it's exciting for the audience because you don't know what he can really do anymore. But they get into this bar. And oh my God,

it's the greatest. There's a million weird aliens. Everything looks cool in this bar. And oh my god, it's the greatest. There's a million weird aliens. Everything looks cool in this bar. There's no weird fucking TVs. Nope. There's no nonsense happening. I mean, you know. There's no Elansli's Bagano.

That's the one strike I'd hold against this movie. No, instead. I don't know how George feels about cigarettes. I need someone to tell me. Elansli's Bagano doesn't show up. Instead, there's a walrus-faced man, basically. There's a fucking who's back and no doesn't show up. Instead there's a walrus faced man basically. There's a fucking dude who looks like

a hammerhead shark. And a guy who looks like he's had his face burned off and reapplied. The devil. There's a dude who looks like straight

up the devil. Yeah there is. That one's crazy. There's a band and they're playing like a fucking jam. They are. They're awesome.

They look like they're made out of like they're like brains. Yeah. Yeah. They're crazy. Yeah.

But this is like my look like giant shrimps. It's a great song. Yeah. But this is like they look like giant shrimps. It's a great song. But here's what I like. Here's what I like. Two things happen immediately. They walk in the droids are not allowed in.

The bartender's like no. Yeah. All right. All right. That's a comedy bang bang thing. We can't do that. Well this is our podcast.

You're telling me it's a Star Wars podcast. We gotta. We can't. You're telling me it's a Star Wars podcast. We gotta... You're telling me we can't do it because comedy banter is different. Don't you love that Luke just walks up to the bar and orders a drink? Yeah. And the guy next to him is like, I'm gonna kill you. This like walrus face guy is like, hey, fuck you.

Well, there's the dude with the walrus face and then there's a dude... Whose face has been burned off and put back on, basically. Right, he's got like a pig nose. And he just says to him, Luke, who doesn't know Luke? He goes, my friend doesn't like you. And Luke's like, sorry. Sorry. And he goes, I don't like you either.

Luke has done nothing. Yeah. That's how dangerous this situation is. Well, that's what I like about it. It also just feels like this is a drunk lunatic. Mm-hmm. Like, one could say like, well, that's unjustified. But drunk people are unjustified.

Uh, yeah, and this is a dangerous weapon-laden world. And so we- They try to make some fuss with him. We walk into a bar, we see all these aliens,

we go, I've never seen a bar like this, and then a drunk guy picks a fight with him and we're like, no, it's the same as all human bars. Once again, I can relate to this.

Yes! Except then Obi-Wan does cut the walrus guy's arm off with his lightsaber. He's like, we're criminals. We're one in 17 systems. Don't mess with me. Obi-Wan's like, don't. Not worth your time.

Slices his arm. The arm lies on the floor. It's covered in blood. And then everyone just goes back to doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot. Tells you everything you need to know. The rules do not apply here. Now, Qui-Gon didn't tell us that the planet was governed by the Hutts. Yeah.

And we don't know that the Hutts are gangsters. But, you know, we get it. And things have gotten a lot worse since the last time we were here. Then we're introduced. They're trying to get off this planet. They're trying to find a ship. They need to find someone who goes, this is the place where we can find someone who has a ship who can get us out of here.

Han Solo. Okay, played by Harrison Ford. Han Solo we used to call him get us out of here. Han Solo. Okay. Played by Harrison Ford. Han Solo we used to call him, but it's Solo. Han Solo. Han Solo. Han Solo. Who is a badass, sexy, scoundrel, space pirate, smuggler, who's the best, and is like a cowboy. We thought Jimmy Smits was handsome.

Oh my God. Little did we know. The man is just ridiculous. This guy's incredible. But I want to say something. He's a problem. Who's his partner? Okay, now. It's Chewbacca.

It's goddamn Chewbacca. But guess what? I like the guy now. Oh, he's great. I finally see what everyone else is talking about. Oh, my God. That time when Yoda wrote him the college recommendation, I was like, what is this based on?

Chewbacca's a good citizen. Chewbacca's here. But Chewbacca rules. Chewbacca's like the muscle. Chewbacca's like his silent enforcer who's just got his back. And Han Solo is like a space cowboy. Yeah, space cowboy. I'm not talking about James Garner, fucking Donald Sutherland, Tommy Lee Jones, Clint Eastwood.

I'm talking about a young buck. John Hamm's in that movie? In Space Cowboys, yeah. And Marcia Gay Harden. Melissa Gay Harden. Yeah, Melissa, Marcia Gay Harden. Melissa Joan Gay Harden. Melissa Gay Harden. Yeah, Melissa, Marcia Gay Harden. Melissa Joan Gay Harden. He's like an old Western cowboy, gunslinger, scoundrel.

You never know where his allegiance is. He's in trouble. Yeah. Like, he's acting cool, and he's like, I've got a fast ship, you're going to need me. Fastest ship in the galaxy. And then they're like, fine, we'll pay you X money. Which he's like, I need $15,000.

$15,000? We could buy a ship for that. Which he's like, I need $15,000. $15,000? We could buy a ship for that. And he's like, who's gonna pilot it? I'm Han Solo. And you're like, fuck, this guy is confident. His dick is on the table. On the table, and it looks good. It's nicely shaped. It's not even about size, because people focus on size. They focus on length or girth, but it's about fucking

the proportions of it, because you don't want a thick dick with a little head. You know what I'm saying? It's a nice looking dick. It looks like a fucking health class diagram. And they go, we don't have $15,000. I guess we don't have a ship. We'll pay you $2,000 now, $15,000 later. $17,000. Okay, meet me at the dock.

I have some business to sort out. And then they leave and to Chewbacca he's like, holy shit, this is perfect. We're in so much trouble right now. That's what I love about him. He's got so much bravado. And then to Chewbacca he's like, holy shit, this is perfect. We're in so much trouble right now. That's what I love about him. He's got so much bravado. And then to Chewbacca, he's like, fucking hell, we are in trouble. Then he has an altercation. It turns out he was wearing a fake dick. And his real dick is still big, but it wasn't as big as he was pretending it was.

He has an altercation with a green erodian. Greedo. I love this guy. Yeah, who just sits down and is like, not so fast, Solo. Talking in another language. Han's trying to back out quickly. Subtitles. Han understands what he's saying though.

He's speaking in English. And then they shoot at each other and I don't want to get into that because I hate the internet. They shoot at each other. He doesn't. He kills this Greedo guy because you don't fuck with him.

Greedo's going to shoot him. It's clearly a standoff. Han ends up winning. There's a dead body in the bar. And once again, Han just leaves because this bar's crazy. Sorry about the mess.

Then he goes to his ship and he chats with Jabba the Hutt. I hate this scene. Bad scene. I gotta say, this is one scene I really don't like.

It feels unfinished. It feels like tossed off. Also a lot of CGI. Weird CGI. For a movie that was shot in 1977. At one point he walks over, well they think

this is the updated version. That's the problem when he finally finished it. But isn't it jarring because the rest of the movie He walks over his tail and it looks like garbage. Did you watch this?

It's terrible. But the rest... So we get the Jabba the Hutt who we know. Yes. He was the race guy, the pod race guy. Right.

Apparently he's moved up the ranks. I mean, he's like really now like a slumlord. And even though this Greedo got just tried to, like literally just tried to kill Han Solo. Yeah.

Jabba's like, look, all right, you know, don't worry about it. This scene makes no sense. Did you notice in the background, too? It totally diffuses the tension of, like, his debt. Did you notice in the background, too, of this scene, there are, like, six identical Greedos? Like, not just species, like, the same species, but wearing the exact same outfit. That's weird. The same jumpsuit with the little vest.

Also, Jango Fett's kind of in the background, but he looks different. There's like a green Jango Fett. Yeah, that's weird. No dialogue. This scene sucks. I love this movie, but like, you know. No, this scene is garbage.

Demerits where demerits are due. Anyway. This scene blows. But it doesn't matter because they get off the planet. Yes. They get in the Millennium Falcon. Han Solo's super awesome ship. Right.

Which is cool. Got Chewbacca by his side, a loyal friend. It's super cool. Yeah. This ship looks great. It's weird. This is our skeleton crew. It looks like a saucer.

It's got weird bits all over it. I love this ship. It doesn't look sleek and sexy. Now, I think you get- It looks lived in. It looks very lived in. It's not like this, like, every space, like, you know, setting is always, like, this sleek, clean, like, white-lit, like, room. This looks like dudes who are, like, out, like, doing their thing, living it up.

Every single thing in the Phantom Menace trilogy, the OT, looked like it was fresh off the storeroom floor from Best Buy. Now, maybe this is intentional. That's supposed to be the nice old age, the Republic, very like finery. It's like old ancient Rome. And now here we are in the shit. Everyone's just banging shit together. But intent doesn't matter if it's bad. I don't disagree with you.

You see this ship. They paid him so much money to get on this ship. And they look at it and they immediately go, this fucking thing? Yeah, Luke is like, ew. Yeah, gross. And even Han Solo's like, look, she's better than she looks. She'll get you there. He's not saying, gross. And even Han Solo's like, look, she's better than she looks. She'll get you there. He's not saying, right, he's not saying, like, how dare you insult my perfect ship.

Yeah, he goes, look, a ship's a ship. There's a lot of cool stuff in this scene, in the Falcon scene. C-3PO plays this board game with Chewbacca. Sort of like computer chess. But with monsters. Yeah, that's pretty cool. They're fighting each other. And in that scene.

C-3PO accuses him of cheating. Or he's winning. He's going to rip your arms out. Chewbacca's like, last time Chewbacca lost to somebody, ripped his arms out. Just now. And it's like, ooh, Chewbacca. Ooh, interesting. Because he seems all loyal, but he also does not fuck around.

Doesn't fuck around. And also he doesn't speak in English. No, although he doesn't in the original movies. I know, but that's a good carryover. But here's some other things I just want to note quickly from these scenes.

You've got like more discussion of the Force. Han Solo's kind of like a counterbalance to Obi-Wan. Oh, and he hates the Force. He just thinks it's stupid. He's like,

I've been around the world. I've never seen anything so interesting. Because like, he must have been a child when the Jedi purge happened. So he grew up in a world without the Force. That's the idea. he likes a trusty blaster that's all

all you need meanwhile luke has his lightsaber and he's learning how to like block lasers he's trying to it's kind of cool and hansel is like wasted time here's the thing i think we need to talk about the way they discuss the force in this movie is very different yeah it's very vague like it let's remember it is established by man that the force is essentially a blood disease right it's like sickle cell anemia well or at least like having access to it it's a blood disease right gives you access this thing here the way obi-wan talks about it's like a living binding energy of all living things it's like just an energy yeah it's an energy it's like this atmosphere kind binding energy of all living things. It's like just an energy. Yeah. It's an energy. It's like this atmosphere kind of around us at all times, but just some of us are more

attuned to it. It's the thing that unites us, you know? You might not believe in God, but, you know, a personification, a guy with a beard and a fucking, you know, cloak up in the clouds. But there's some thing. Yeah. There's some larger thing here that you can look to as an answer. Are you going to talk about Alderaan?

Well, yeah. Yeah. Even the way that Han Solo talks about it, he's just kind of like, look, I've seen a lot of stuff but you're telling me there's one thing uniting all of this? No, we're out in the universe, you know? He's like, Han Solo, you get a sense that this guy's been given a shit end of the stick.

I don't think this guy's lived a good life. No, he's a scoundrel. Right, and he's had to, by hook or by crook, get where he is he is today and he just goes i'm not believing in any higher power and obi-wan's just kind of like look there's something i'm telling you some people are able to tap into it it's not like you within your system have magical powers no there's a force that you can channel i just love the way they talk what i love is that very quickly, over on the Death Star, they blow up Alderaan. Leia's home planet. Leia's home planet.

They blow it up kind of as a way to get info out of her, but also she gives up the info before they blow up the planet, or at least she gives up some info. It's kind of hard to tell whether it's true or not. Meeting Peanuts, yeah. Yeah, it's fine. I've been doing it all episode. Also, I give the Peanuts movie 4.5 out of 10. That's about right.

You're getting the, how scary this Death Star is. It can blow up a planet. Holy shit. How evil the Empire is. They callously blow up seemingly like one of the galactic centers of the universe just to kind of prove their power. And when it happens, Obi-Wan like sinks into his chair in horror because it's like, whoa, we get it. The force.

Very powerful. I changed my mind. I give the Peanuts movie four out of ten. The Peanuts movie was not good. It's not good. I give it a four. And that's being overly kind. I agree.

That's mostly because we like Peanuts. Yeah. The characters are Peanuts. And the food. Yeah. Agreed. Obi-Wan just sits there. He feels, he like looks.

He says like, I heard a million, a billion voices, whatever, cry out and then be silenced. And this is the idea of the Force 2 is it's like not just having the ability to fucking do like backflips. It's about being connected, you know? It almost feels like a greater sense of empathy as well, you know? Let's move on though because we need to mention to sort of the final act and a half of this movie i do want to mention there's one scene that i think was one of the scenes that we just sort of passed in where we are in the story where leia just has a british accent oh really yeah which one's that she's very affected like it's very like i will never tell you anything

carrie fisher we didn't mention this. Yeah. Daughter of Debbie Reynolds. Yeah, yeah. Ghost writer of Hook. I think she did a pass on Hook. Sure, yeah. She did a pass.

She wrote postcards from The Edge. She's really good in this. She was in it when Harry met Sally. She's great, but she's very young. She's very young, but she's got a lot of attitude. No, she's great. She's got this weird hairstyle. Oh, right. It looks like she's wearing honey She's. No she's great. She's got this weird hairstyle. Oh right.

It looks like she's wearing honey buns. Yeah it's great. Anyway what I like is so we've got all these disparate threads. The storytelling is just so much clearer.

It's so good. But every time it gets pulled together when they're trying to get these plans to the rebels they get sucked in by the Death Star. They think it's a moon.

Which they're like holy shit this thing is so big. They think it's a moon. Which they're like holy shit this thing is so big. They think it's a moon. It's crazy. It's huge. They get sucked on board but using Han Solo's brilliant sneaking powers. It's so fucking good. They manage to sort of infiltrate this Death

Star. Well the ship lands at like the loading bay or whatever. Yeah and they like hide. They send a bunch of troopers in and they go like ship's empty I don't know what to tell you. Right. They're hiding under the floorboards. When everyone leaves, knock out a couple stormtroopers,

take their uniforms. Han and Luke are dressed as troopers. Are they, no, I'm trying to remember, are they just trying to deliver the plans, or are they trying to get Leia? Because they find out about Leia. No, it's random,

because R2 just plugs into the computer, and he's like, the princess is here. And Luke is like, hey, guess what? Let's go because R2 just plugs into the computer and he's like, the princess is here. And Luke is like, hey, guess what? Let's go get her. If we get the princess, he's like, I don't care.

He's got a little bit of a hard on for Leia. No question, which is weird. That's a weird move on George's part because they don't know because they've been

raised apart, but the whole audience knows because we have all seen the first three movies before watching this one. Han Solo, not into it. The whole audience

knows that they're fucking siblings and Luke is like, no, no, I just want to rescue the princess. It's like, no, you want to fuck her. And you hear those stories sometimes about siblings,

twins who are raised apart and then they fall in love. We have 20 minutes left. I know, but it's a weird... Griffin, 20 minutes. My God, let's go. I want to focus on

Dexter Jester's Diner though because there's some things we didn't cover. I know that's a couple miniseries ago, but there's some things we didn't cover. What are you's a couple miniseries ago but I want there's some things we didn't cover. What are you talking about?

He's got a robot waitress, Flo. Oh, Ben's grabbing peanuts. He's just doing a bit. Yeah, Han Solo doesn't want to do it. There's all these cool it's so low level. He just goes like

I just want to do my job. How does he get Han on board to rescue Leia? He goes like you like money. Can you imagine what's going to happen

if you rescue a princess? Yeah, right. You're going to be famous all the doors are going to open foria. He goes like, you like money. Can you imagine what's going to happen if you rescue a princess? Yeah, right. You're going to be famous. All the doors are going to open for you. He just goes, really? Okay, I'm on board. So they sneak into the ship. But here's, I just, there's no flubber. There's no flubber. There's so many stakes. It's so dangerous. Yeah. If this was Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, or

Obi-Wan and Anakin, they would be like, uh-oh, 80 dozen fucking, you know, know robots let's kill them here it's like like every situation is fraught i love it and there's a lot of legitimately good banter there's a great moment where han goes on to like he's they're shooting at a bunch of troopers and then someone comes over the com yeah goes like, we saw a malfunction here and there. And he goes, no, don't worry about it. And they go, should we send additional troops? And he goes, no, it's fine. Gas leak,

whatever. And they keep on asking questions. He's very funny. He shoots it, and he goes, bad conversation anyway. Lawrence Kasdan called that his favorite piece of dialogue in the whole movie. It's the best. But they find Leia. They find Leia. Leia, love her. She's like, who are you dweebs?

This sucks. Fuck you guys. These two? This is who rescues me? You're like immediately subverting the trope of like, oh, the princess in the high tower who has to be rescued by the knight, you know? She like leads them into a garbage compactor to get away from things. She wastes no time to pick up a blaster.

There's this awesome scene in a garbage compactor with a monster. Talk about clear objectives. No, it's great. They're in a garbage compactor with a monster. Talk about clear objectives. No, it's great. They're in a garbage compactor. They got to get out of there. R2-D2, C3 power up on board. And it's like, can we get them to pack into the system? Right.

And it takes, you know, they're almost crushed. Yeah. It's cool. Yeah. Chewie's with them too. Yeah. Because they pretend he's their prisoner. Yeah.

That's kind of cool. Now the Han and Leia dynamic from the jump yeah is the best very early it's really funny they're firecrackers they're so good together

you see that tension just right from the start I just love how how risky all of this is yeah and how clear that is the whole time yeah

very clear stakes at every moment what's the next objective what's happening on the fringe of this Vader hanging out on the Death Star is like is Obi-Wan here? He's like literally, he's getting like a ping.

Obi-Wan Kenobi? That guy my old master? And they're like, no, don't worry about it. We checked the sign-in sheet. The last guy was named Old Ben Kenobi. So no concern there. Tarkin's like. The guest list has Old Ben Kenobi.

Tarkin's like, yeah? And he's like, I feel him. list has old Ben Kenobi. Tarkin's like, yeah. He's like, I feel him. And so the paths kind of diverge at this point where Obi-Wan Kenobi kind of like deactivates the tractor beam so they can escape.

So you've got Luke, Han and Leia escaping. And Obi-Wan locked in this final battle with Darth Vader. Darth Vader comes head to head. Yeah. And it's mostly talking. Yeah. Because Anakin is mostly talking. Yeah. Because Anakin is clearly no athlete, but they don't make him flubber around.

But it's like classical sword fighting. Yes. Just very, very short, simple strokes. Right. Because my old apprentice, my master, this and that. It's very vague. You would think Anakin would say more things like, how did you survive? And like, what's up, man?

Like, isn't this crazy? I'm a big robot now. I'm more surprised he's still alive here. The last time they met was on Mustafar. Yeah. But it does feel, I mean, Obi-Wan probably has heard of Anakin. No, my guess is that Vader knows that Obi-Wan's not dead. Because he probably would have like checked the sort of purge roster.

Like, did we get him? Did we get him? But he's so, I mean, he really is so, Anakin's dead. I mean, they keep on saying over the course of Purge roster. Did we get him? Did we get him? But he's so, I mean, he really is so... Anakin is dead. I mean, they keep on saying over the course of the movie, Anakin Skywalker is your father. He died. He was killed by Darth Vader. That's a thing Obi-Wan says. Which we know is not true, but

it makes a weird sort of sense. He's sort of softening the blow. Because it's like, well, Anakin is dead. Darth Vader's a different person. He was completely corrupted, you know? And they keep on talking about him in that way. And it sort of feels he thinks about it. Darth Vader's a different person. He was completely corrupted, you know? And they keep on talking about him in that way. And it sort of feels like you're surprised that Darth Vader doesn't have a stronger response to seeing Obi-Wan, but it's also like that was a lifetime ago. Darth Vader doesn't have any feelings for Obi-Wan.

And there's this great line he has to himself where he's like, I feel something, a presence I've not felt since dot, dot, dot, the end. We get it. Get it. Since the original three movies. Less is more, George. They have a fight. Obi-Wan, in an act of sacrifice, like just sort of puts his sword up, gets his head chopped off, vanishes into nothingness.

He doesn't get his head chopped off. Well, right. He gets sort of struck down. And then he just vanishes. He just vanishes. Like a David Copperfield trick. Yeah. The robe just falls to the floor.

And Vader kicks his robe. There's nothing there. And he hits it with his foot. You know what it feels like. It feels like that deleted scene, once again, where Yoda is talking to dead Qui-Gon, and some dude doing a temp track for Qui-Gon. Yeah, no, I know.

It's like, I found a way. Because Obi-Wan has a moment. He looks at Vader. This is in the movie. It's not just the deleted scene. There's a scene in the actual film where Yoda explains it. But the fuller explanation. I know, scene in the actual film where Yoda explains it. But the fuller explanation.

I know, I know. But still, we get it. He went off to this one with the force universe. There's a moment where Obi-Wan looks at Luke before he's struck, and he sort of just holds a sword in front of him and volunteers himself to die. But it feels like he's not dying. And he says to Vader, I'll become something even more powerful. And he just disappears.

He doesn't die. We've seen a lot of deaths in the Star Wars universe. And he's not dead because we hear his voice throughout the rest of the movie kind of nudging Luke on. He might have left this mortal coil but like yeah the voice is still echoing. Okay so they get Leia. They get off

that ship. They get to the Rebel Alliance which is on the base Yavin 4 on this like forest planet. Forest moon whatever. Rebel Alliance I mean they might not base Yavin 4 on this forest planet, forest moon, whatever. Rebel Alliance, I mean, they might not be as powerful in numbers as the Emperor, but they're pretty strong. They got a lot of ships. They got a lot of people.

We should talk about the ships. Rebel Alliance have these X-wing things. So cool. Very cool. The Empire has these TIE fighter things. They look like bow ties. Oh, they're so awesome. They make this screaming noise.

Where were they? And the X-wings it's like you're gonna because the other things like oh this is a y-wing this is an x-wing the wings these things got wacky wings you've never seen before no it's cool most times you just got two wings sticking out tie fighter it's like two wings sticking out and then two vertical yeah and shield weird looks like a goddamn bow tie and I love it. I love it too. We're talking about this because the last act of this movie,

it's, how long is it? Like half an hour? It's a lot of time. Yeah, yeah. Is this sort of real time assault by the Rebel Alliance on the Death Star.

Right. The plans have exposed like this one, if you drive down this trench and shoot a torpedo down this little exhaust port, you could maybe blow up the whole thing. This guy's named like Jan Dodonna or something like that.

Oh, yeah, that guy. Right. The old guy. And he shows this like it's really, really clear storytelling. Very simple, like sort of wire frame graphics. There's like an animatic behind him, and he's like, here's the ship. The only way we could take down the Death Star. Right.

If you hit a direct shot. It's a little video gamey. It's a little video game-y. It's a little video game-y. It is. But also pretty much pre-video games at the time production started. That is true. You know? One could say that video game objectives were perhaps based off of.

Yeah, fair enough. Fair enough. Go on. But it's like there's this one shoot that then goes to the power core. Right, that'll blow up the whole Death Star. Maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the weakness that they have detected.

And there's no guarantee it will definitely work because the shot has to hit perfectly. Right. But if you hit your shot down this one thing and it managed to travel all the way down, the whole thing would explode. And they're like, there's no chance of that happening. Well, good luck.

May the force be with you. And he tosses it off like it's like, God bless you, you know? And Luke is going to be a pilot. He says it like Godspeed. He just goes, Godspeed. May the force be with you. And he tosses it off like it's like, God bless you. You know? And Luke is going to be a pilot. He says it like Godspeed. He just goes, Godspeed. May the force be with you. This guy's not a believer. It's just like a thing you say. It's kind of interesting to see non-Jedi saying

that. Right. But it's like they're agnostic. Yeah, it's kind of like an old saying, right? When people say Godspeed, they don't believe it. They don't go like, actually, God may have speed in your journey. So all these storylines have kind of gotten wrapped up into this one big final confrontation.

Luke is going to get the chance he's always wanted to fly. It's not like, let's have four different confrontations cut between them. What was with Luke's friend, though? His old friend. He mentions him at the beginning of the movie.

He's like, Biggs, Biggs. He's like, Biggs has gone on to do other stuff. Yeah, but no, I think there were some deleted scenes there. There were some deleted scenes, I think. Yeah, it's not good. No, but I like it. He mentions Biggs. I would have liked one because Biggs' death is like kind of this big moment and you're like, okay.

You know, it's a little light. But Han and Chewbacca are like, peace. We're out of here. We got our money. He has like crates of money. It's like being wheeled by this kind of awesome. And he's like, I don't fucking do this shit. Yeah, and Luke's like, come on, I thought you were more than this. And Han's like, no, thank you.

I never said I was more than this. I'm looking out for number one. I'm Han Solo, goddammit. Now, so, I just like the simplicity of it. It's basically like if Phantom Menace had just ended with Anakin taking down the donut ship. Yeah. Or if the attack of the clones had just

ended with, I don't even fucking know. It just had not existed. It makes the stakes so much higher. Luke Skywalker. Rather than like, what's happening over here? Oh, what's happening over here? It's just Luke and Vader, who's in his own ship. but very similar

i mean mirroring the end of phantom menace it's like okay now luke anakin's son is in a similar ship he once again has r2 he does riding shotgun he does in the back oh that droid he bought the beginning of the movie now fits perfectly into this x-wing yes and this guy's been around the block yeah yeah and they're against each other. We're cutting to Tarkin on the Death Star, kind of being like, ha, ha, ha, we're going to blow them up.

Yeah. We're cutting to Leia and Threepio and the other guys at the Rebel Alliance being like, oh, you know. Yeah, watching.

Can you pull this off? Yeah. But it's just this great dogfight. It's so cool. It's so well done. There's one really stupid CGI shot. Which one? It's like the establishing shot

where you see them coming around like the red planet. Oh, it's alright. But there's the way he makes it, it's so simple and sparse. It feels like you're watching like old newsreel footage. I could do a million. I mean You could talk about this movie for 15,000 hours.

I mean, I think it's very inspired by World War II. Like newsreel footage. But you know what I'm saying? Spaceships we haven't seen before, backdrops. It's not of the real world, but the visual language of it. One by one, all the other guys are dying off. Luke's the one guy, he's a rookie, but he's got something. There's this weird thing.

They need to get into this trench. Yeah. So they have to drive down this trench. And they're being pursued by Vader. And Vader's ship's obviously faster. And can I just say, I love a bad guy like your villain but he's getting his hands dirty. Oh, he's in there.

He's like, get my ship ready. You want to send some troopers out? And he's like, no, I want to send fucking Darth Vader out. Hell yeah. His TIE fighter's like even more curved. Yeah, he's got this compact little thing. But here's what I like also. Tarkin in the Death Star, they come up to him and they're like, man, they might be able to do this. And he's like, do you want to evacuate?

And he's like, no! No! Are you crazy? I'm not going anywhere. It's a little like Palpatine in the Clone Wars where he's like, I'll stay here. I've got nothing to say about that. Anyway. Anyway.

I mean, there's not even much to analyze about this scene. Well, no. You're missing the biggest point. Well, you mean Han Solo returning? Right. So the TIE fighters are coming at him. Oh, Luke's going to be in trouble. Who comes back?

Oh, my God. He does care. He has a heart. He's going to play it cool. He's going to pretend. Fucking Han Solo. My main guy. Chewbacca. The Wookiee. Riding shotgun. Here's what's good about it, my main guy. No, no, no. Chewbacca, the Wookiee, riding shotgun.

Here's what's good about it, though. Everything. Well, yeah. But also, it's like Vader's on Luke's ass. He's killed Biggs. He's killed all these guys. About to kill Luke. Han shoots one of his side pieces. And Vader goes like, what?

And like spins out of the trench, spins away. You don't even know where he is. And you just see all we need. One shot of Han just going yeehaw. Like that's it. Yeah. It's so good. Yeah.

That's all we need. And Luke is. And he's like, come on, Luke. Wrap it up. And Luke's like, great. I got it. Bam. It's over.

Well, Luke's in the trench. It's foregone. You're missing a big point though. Luke's in the trench. He's got the shot. He doesn't know if he can make it. And then he hears Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan's like, you can do it, buddy.

Use the force. Turn off your computers. Use the force, Luke. Turn off the computers. It's so good. He blows up the Death. He doesn't know if he can make it. And then he hears Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan's like, you can do it, buddy. Use the force. Turn off your computers. Use the force, Luke. It's so good. He blows up the Death Star. It's great. Tarkin's dead. Fucking, they get medals.

It's a party. At the end of the movie, I mean, it's very similar to the end of Phantom. Oh, I guess so. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, instead of Black Death holding up an orb. Phantom is like, diplomacy! The Trade Federation has, its blockade is over, although it still exists. But it cuts straight to that, essentially.

I think the victory is just so clear. Yeah, and we just want to see a celebration. We want to see our guys getting their dues. They blew up the fucking Death Star, which is an atrocity. That thing is an atrocity. Yep, sucks. They blew it up. I hate it.

I'll go on record saying I hate the Death Star. Vader is still alive. He just spiraled out. We don't know. We don't know where he is. Well, we see him just like... Yeah, but what's going to happen to our fair now? The end is awesome.

Point of contention, though. Yeah, go ahead. So it's a party. There's no dialogue. No, a party. It's like a ceremony. Oh, is your point of contention that Chewbacca doesn't get a medal? Well, more than that, okay?

It's a little weird. So Luke is the one who blew up the Death Star. Sure. Totally deserves a medal. No question deserves a medal. Are you saying Wedge deserves a medal? Han also gets a medal. Yeah, for showing up.

I think if Han gets a medal, then everyone should get a medal. Yeah, participation. I think either you give one- It's a participation medal. Either you give one to Luke alone, or you give one to Luke, Han, C-3PO, R2-D2, Chewbacca, Wedge. I think Wedge should get one. Wedge is the only other survivor. He's a good guy.

He's cool. I like him. I think maybe one Y-Wing survives. You want to hear something crazy? Yeah, go ahead. If I'm not mistaken, Wedge Antilles, the actor is... Yeah, Dennis Lawson. Great actor.

He's Ewan McGregor's uncle. Yeah. He's a great actor. That's crazy. Yeah, no, it's crazy. England's a small place. So this is the best Star Wars movie. It's Ewan McGregor's uncle. Yeah. He's a great actor. That's crazy. Yeah, no, it's crazy. England's a small place. So this is the best Star Wars movie. It's the best.

It's the best of the Phantom Menace series. It is, so far. We're going to watch the other one. Yeah, what do you think happens in the next one? The Empire Strikes Back's a great title. Well, it sounds, you know, it sounds dark. Maybe some of our favorite characters. I mean, well, George said most of them didn't come back.

I'm hoping TC-14, like, because we saw her in this one. Maybe Darth Maul shows up finally. God. We keep predicting it. We've got to clone him, yeah. I hope there's, like, some really awesome new planets, like, in, like, environments we've never seen before. That would be cool.

Yeah, because this we mostly saw. It was a very similar environment. This is set on Tatooine, and then it's set on the Falcon and the Death Star, and then it's set on this. Yeah, I mean, four is a forest planet. Yeah, I mean, four. But we really barely see it. I'd love to see some new terrains, yeah.

No, but I mean, so why do we like this movie? It's simple and clear. Its story is really clear. It's a battle between good versus evil, and it's a hero accepting, two heroes really, accepting the call. And it's fun characters, fun, relatable characters who all buck their conventions a lot.

It's not about political malfeas the, what planet don't we see? Yeah. Fucking Coruscant. You could pause. More like Lame-a-sant. You could, hey, nice one. You could pause this movie at any point in time. Thank you.

Everyone's really proud of that. I'm really proud of you, David. It's so good. You could watch this movie with a six-year-old and pause it at any point in time and go, what are they trying to do? And they'd be able to tell you they're trying to blow up the death start they're trying to get out the trash motivation here yeah super clear you pause during phantom ass they go i there's a guy with a beard and he's talking to a guy who feels like the dude who delivers chinese

food has has uh has stalled the senate's deliberations on um well, and the Jedi's, you know, they're being deployed, but in secret. And now think about this. There's no 70s politics in the movie. Yeah, fucking Watergate's happening. Right. A few years earlier. You're not talking about any of that. Universal mythic storytelling.

And like Mark Hamill is not giving a great performance in this, but it fucking works. It's a crayon that he uses powerfully. Let's do a very brief performance review. Very brief performance review, okay? I'm just going to call up Star Wars episode. I'm going to call it up. I just realized we should totally

do a very brief performance review. Where are we, Ben? You're 75. Cool. Very brief. Let's just knock this off, and then, guys, we're going to see you next week

for Empire Strikes Back, right? I think you mean the podcast strikes back. That's right. All right, here we go. It's actually pretty hard to call up Star Wars 9 TV. There's a lot of options. Okay, great. It's crazy.

All right, number one, we have Mark Hamill as Luke Skywalker. Pro, yes. Pass. Pass. I'm going to give him a fail, but I think he's effective. I don't think it's a good performance, but they use the character well. Harrison Ford as Han Solo. Hard pass.

The hardest of passes. But you see this is what I don't like about the language because hard pass usually is a negative thing. You know what I mean? Like hard pass. Hard win.

Whatever you want to say. Great. Thumbs up. I like saying hard pass. Two thumbs up. Best performance of the four films we've seen so far. Best performance of cinema.

Yep. Carrie Fisher as Leia Organa. Pass. Thumbs up. Peter Cushing as Grand Moff Tarkin. Pass. You fucking kidding me? He's the best. Alec Guinness as Obi-Wan Kena. Pass. Thumbs up. Peter Cushing as Grand Moff Tarkin. Pass. You fucking kidding me?

He's the best. Alec Guinness as Obi-Wan Kenobi. Pass. So good. Anthony Daniels as C-3PO. He's amazing. He's amazing. Definitely.

So good. Can we finally say that Kenny Baker really rocked it as R2-D2? Yeah, he's so good in this. Peter Mayhew as Chewbacca. Kenny Baker's great. This pass. So good. David Prowse as Darth Vader.

Who's this guy? I don't know. It must have been the guy in the suit. He's just in the suit Good physicality He's big Pass Phil Brown is Uncle Owen

Pass Shalee Frazier is Beru Pass She's great You know what? I want to go back I'm going to give Mark Hamill a pass too Yeah, of course

You're outrageous Do you want me to do them all? There's a lot No, no, no, no We're good, we're good I think we've got this Actually, you know what? No

Jack Purvis is Chief Jawa. The first Jawa. The major Jawa. Yeah, from Time Bandits? Pass. Alex McCrindle is General Dodonna. Pass. Eddie Byrne is General Willard.

I don't know who that is. You're going to pass, everybody. We already know where this is going. Drew Henley is Red Leader. He's pretty good. He's really good, actually. He's like an old, salty space dog. We didn't talk about my favorite character. Well, let's see if we get to him. Red 2, Wedge, Dennis Lawson. He's really good, actually. He's like an old salty space dog. We didn't talk about my favorite character.

Well, let's see if we get to him. Red 2, Wedge, Dennis Lawson. He's great. Pass, but not my favorite character. Garrick Hagon is big. Pass, but not my favorite character. There's Red 4. Is it Red 6, Porkins? Yep. Played by William Hootkins, who I once saw give a great performance

as Alfred Hitchcock on the London stage. He was fantastic. He's a fat guy. His name is Porkins. He fucking flies next to me. He dies so fast. He barely fits in. He didn't even bother to shave. This guy rules.

He doesn't even have a beard. He's got fucking stubble. He looks like me. His ship crashes into a star by mistake. He's so shitty. He gets to the Death Star and he's like, oh, God. And then he's just shot to death. This movie rules. It's the best Star Wars yet's like, oh, God, and then he's just shot to death. This movie rules.

It's the best Star Wars yet. It's the best movie ever made. Porkins, fucking forever. I love it. Ben, final thoughts. I got to say, you know, having done, what, 30-some-odd episodes on the prequels? Yeah, what is this, like our 36th episode? Something like that.

I don't know. It was like a nightmare. By prequels, you mean original trilogy, right? Yeah. I called them the prequels, too. Oh, right. Yeah. They were the first trilogy.

These are the sequels. So I recognize we were maybe a little hard on George, though, throughout that time. We did. But it was tough. Anyway, God, this guy really created something really special. The guy nailed it. I mean, it's amazing. We should mention, written and directed by George Lucas.

Edited by... Ben Burtt? Marsha Lucas. We'll talk about that in future episodes. Oh, you're so obsessed with that. I'm obsessed with that. I got a lot of things

to say left in that. Thank you so much for listening. No, you said enough on the fucking commentary. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for listening, guys. Rate, review, subscribe, email us,

griffindavidpresent at gmail.com. What do you think? Blank check. What do you guys think? Or griffindavidpresent at gmail.com what do you think blank check what do you guys think or griffindavidpresent and also give me your address

I'll send you a motherfucking comtech chip you will and guess what some of them are from this movie it's true

I didn't I wasn't even mentioned it before you gave me Qui-Gon I have a Qui-Gon yeah I mean they're mostly

from your Phantom but I got a couple I have were the bartender I have were the bartender who doesn't want droids I have a Han. I have Wur the bartender. I have Wur. Oh, Wur the bartender, who doesn't want droids in his system.

I have a Han Solo. You might get that. So email me. I'll send you a ComTech trip. We love you all so, so much. You guys are the best. And as always, may the force be with you.