Blank Check with Griffin & David - I Love You to Death

Episode Date: December 3, 2023

Mamma mia! We’ve got-a some-a sleepy pasta for-a you to taste-a this-a week! In our latest, much-awaited installment of PORCH CLASSICS, we’re handing the reins to Producer Ben, who has chosen to spotlight a forgotten comedy about “the world’s horniest pizza man who cannot die.” Lawrence Kasdan’s I LOVE YOU TO DEATH is a feast of bizarre performances (Italian-face Kevin Kline, Serb-face Joan Plowright, Stoner-face William Hurt) and tonal miscalculations. All this to say - it’s a very FUN movie to talk about. This episode is sponsored by: Uncommon Goods (uncommongoods.com/check) MONSTER by Hirokazu Kore-eda (wellgousa.com) AuraFrames.com (CODE: CHECK) Join our Patreon at patreon.com/blankcheck Follow us @blankcheckpod on Twitter and Instagram! Buy some real nerdy merch at shopblankcheckpod.myshopify.com or at teepublic.com/stores/blank-check

when someone shoot you in the head and make it your podcast. Hey, Pepino! David is throwing a baseball cap as if it is pizza dough, spinning it over his head. Ben, can we try a second take of that? And I don't think you should feel any need to be bashful on the accent. Okay, so you're saying you're Kevin Kline. It's 1990.

Someone asked you to play an Italian-American. Go full Luigi on it. Want someone to shoot you in the head and make it your podcast. One of the many things I find fascinating

about this movie is I would say Kevin Kline, amongst all living actors, is at the absolute top-tier indiction. Right right when i think about kevin klein i'm like that guy speaks clearly that guy fucking enunciates he hits syllables you're like that is a classically trained man yeah and then him trying to do a silly accent on top of that

you cannot stop hearing the pizza box guy caricature voice fighting against his sort of like mid-atlantic play to the back of the house i would agree yes he wants to be shakespearean but also pizza man he looks like he's having fun he looks like something all right the man is no question having fun he's having a blast he's having a blast he's having a good time i think everyone in this movie is kind of having fun. Yeah. Looking down, fun, fun, fun, fun, fun. Yeah, everyone's having fun.

Yep, yep. I mean, they're going for it. People are going for it. What is this? What are we doing here? What is going on? What's happening? Yes.

Well, guys, hello. Welcome to Blank Check with Griffin and David. That's Griffin. That's David. And who's this? It's me, Ben Hosley, the producer. Producer Ben. Producer Ben.

Ben-ducer. Yeah. Produer Ben. Yeah. Oh, the nicknames are back. Poet Laureate. Yeah. I'm not looking at the list.

The Tiebreaker. Birthday Benny. Dirt Bike Benny. Wishful Benny. Yeah. Yeah. The Commish. The Commish.

The Fiddler. Is that what we called it? The Futzer. The Futzer. The Futzer. Yeah. Yeah. The commish. The commish. What do we call it? The fiddler? Is that what we called it? The futzer? The futzer. The futzer. Yeah. Yep. Yeah.

These are just some of the many nicknames. Fuckmaster. We've kind of really abandoned this. Not Professor Christie. Which is okay. Close personal friend of Dan Lewis. Of course. The voice of reason.

Yes. Which I don't think is true anymore. At this point, who is? I don't know. Retired to different titles over the course of different years. Marie is not the voice of reason.

No, she isn't. Tracer, Ben Kenobi, Ben Knight Shyamalan. Come on, Kylo Ben. Kylo Ben, Ben's to eat. Ely Ben's with a dollar sign. There's no way you're going to be able

to get to the deep cut. No, no. Or the back half of this because we've barely... I'm not going to get order right, but I'm just the back half of this i'm not gonna get order right but i'm just gonna throw them out there ben 19 the fennel maker yeah uh robo haas yeah mr ben credible uh hasaka of of the jersey of the ditch a ditch of the jersey ditch of the jersey uh beetle vape juice sure which i mean lauren bobert has taken that one away from you many people have made that joke that is a

good point lauren bobert fucking big dogged you on that title i i have no comment we might have to relitigate remember that what's that she thought she could do that because of the writer's strike that's my take she's like that late night wouldn't be able to make jokes yeah no one's gonna call me on this because there's no late like this is late night fodder and they're all on strike. So I'm going to go get fondled at Beetlejuice. Yeah, she gave a handjob and smoked a vape at a touring production of Beetlejuice the musical. She is Beetlevapejuice now.

She is officially Beetlevapejuice. Yeah. It's just so funny that she was kicked out for vaping and was like, I didn't vape. And they were like, we have the footage. Not only did you vape, but there's so much other stuff. You were rubbing dicks and he was grabbing titties. What are you talking about? The vaping is now immaterial.

Yes. Okay. Anyway, do you have any more? Warhaz? Yeah. Christopher Nolan. Ben Hosley met Sally? I mean, okay, okay yes but i was trying to prompt you on nolan uh producer bane yes uh brooks brooks is fuck uh it's not i'll do benny thing no although

that'd be pretty good what is it uh as ben is benglish benglish of course Because I defended Spanglish Eat Drink Ben Hosley Nancy Meyers did you do that one Michael Mann Michael Mann is Fuck There's so much more to do though Tell me which movie 2009 crime film set in Chicago

Public enemies This is actually kind of turned into The box office. Jonathan Demme. Oh, this is fun. This is actually kind of turned into like a game. Yeah, now it's from the box office game. Jonathan Demme. The movie just got re-released. Stop making Ben's. Yes, okay. With a Z. That's the joke there. Yeah. George Miller. George Miller would

be... Is it Ben Pig is his kitty? Correct. We've changed from Haas Pig in the City. Yeah, that's much better. Did we do... Gina Prince Bythewood Uh Would be Uh

The Secret Life Of Ben's But that's the one with the C Yeah correct Okay Uh Zemeckis Zemeckis would be

Oh I don't know I don't even remember us Picking this Really Uh Give me Give me the movie

Back to the Future Part 3 Ben to the Future Part Ben to the Haasley Part 3 Bent to the Future Part 3 Bent to the Hosley Part 3 That seems made up to me Yeah, I think we forgot that one Musker and Clements Musker and Clements would be

Their first film Their first film The Great Mouse Fart Detective Right Yeah Elaine May We forgot that title Fart Detective

That's riffing off of Elaine May would be... Hilariously, I am currently wearing the nickname shirt. Oh, wow. Yes. Okay. Elaine May would be the fucking... What?

It's the heartbreak kid. It's the Haas break kid, apparently. I don't know. For Singleton, we did Ben's and the Haas. What? That's the one with the C. This is sort of like when the nicknames, right? Like, my hand, I'm gesturing sort of like a slow decline.

It's a pretty fast decline, I think. And there's plenty more, because we did recently sort of have to rapid fire come up with a bunch. Yeah, that was a good episode. It's like Benscape from New Haas. Yeah, funny. Bronco Haasley, that's actually good. That's actually incredible. For a champion. I think that was a good episode. It's like Benscape from New Haas. Yeah, funny. Bronco Hosley, that's actually good. That's actually incredible. For Campion.

I think that was a great and powerful suggestion. Yeah, good. For Raimi, that was obvious. All that Haas for Spasi. Yeah, two Zs. Haas 9000 for Kubrick. Funny. Bone Sound Daddy for Selick.

Selick, funny. B2 Ben Spotting for Boyle. I bet we could swing back around on that one I think maybe send the Icarus to check out what happened with Icarus and then Scumbum Jr.

for Keaton that's pretty good but then who did we do after Buster Keaton we did Park Chan-wook we didn't figure that one out oh god what about Fincher we didn't figure that one out. Oh, God. What about Fincher? We haven't figured that one out.

Let's get into the episode. You don't like us completely derailing your episode with this fucking nonsense? I got a pitch. Yeah? Seven. Seven for Fincher. Seven. That's fine by me. And the b is uppercase and backwards seven

okay anyway uh for anyone who's still listening to the episode two people two people um this is blank check sympathy for mr fuckmaster It's a podcast about movies. And directors. Wow, I never do this. And I've heard it so many times. You know, people think it's easy. They think. Everyone thinks they could do it themselves if they were given the chance.

This podcast is about directors. Mr. Vengeance. Oh, yeah. For Park Channel. For Mr. Vengeance. That's good. Great, we're all fucking caught up. Well, we have to do Fincher, but okay. I had seven! Oh, seven. There we go. For Mr. Benjins. That's good. Great. We're all fucking caught up. Well, we have to do Fincher, but okay.

I had seven. Oh, seven. There we go. Perfect. Oh, my God. Wow. It's never been more perfect than Jason. Go ahead.

This is a podcast about directors who have mass success, issued a series of blank checks to make whatever kind of passion products they want. Sometimes they clear and sometimes they bounce, baby. And this is a special one-off episode, a palate cleanser, if you will. It's a Ben's Choice episode. Now, occasionally on the show, our glorious hosts hand the reins over to me

to choose a film. We had, look, end of the year, couple new releases coming out we had to cover, and our next miniseries, which we will have announced at this point is barbara strice and babs baby babs baby is a short one so it felt weird to start it and then interrupt it almost immediately we're doing this and then we got some right new releases right we had basically one open slot that had been driving us mad for a long time trying to

figure out what to put in here and i think we should we should get into a little bit of the backstory there was a little bit of a power struggle here in deciding the ben's choice is that fair to say that's fair i suppose so ben in confidence ben was throwing out a lot of ideas i have many ideas but also in confidence ben threw out to you and to i i would say not in confidence okay go just finish your sentence and then I'll. No, it wasn't confessional. Much like the way this movie opens. Yes. Ben confessing he's too horny.

I'm such a horny boy. Bye-bye. Pizza. Yes. In confidence. Ben said to each of us, you know what I've been thinking could maybe make a Ben's choice, a good Ben's choice. And to each of us, he pitched a movie've been thinking could maybe make a Ben's choice, a good Ben's choice.

And to each of us, he pitched a movie that he knew that we liked, we loved, is sort of a pet cause for us, a recent film that, fingers crossed,

is a franchise starter. Paw Patrol. Not Paw Patrol. Well, that's on your long list. Yeah. Okay, well, you pitched Dungeons & Dragons Honor Among Thieves,

the great the great film of 2020 which you very much want to boost which i want to boost and would love to talk about and also but i want ben's enthusiasm on mike yeah uh but you pitched that to me at marie's wedding griffin was there he may not have been paying attention though no i know i remember him pitching it to me but then like a month later ben says me, you know what I also think could make a good Ben's choice? Mrs. Harris goes to Paris. That's true. And I'm like, I want to fucking give that movie full blank check shine.

Because these are both films that I now own. I like these movies. And watch. Not regularly because I'm not like someone who, you know, I've revisited both of them a couple of times. Both of these movies need sequels. They do. And could use our support. Well, Dungeons & Dragons has got to get a sequel, right?

It's in the tweener state financially. My guess would be no. It's right on the cusp. Although, in this Hollywood, crazier things have happened, I suppose. Because it's fun. And I like that movie a lot. Yeah, and Mrs. Harris went to Paris.

And that is true. She could go several other places if given the chance. Yes, sure. So there's this kind of tug of war going on. Suburbs of Paris, other parts of France. Of both of us trying to sway you towards one or the other. And then David one day comes in and says, you know what?

I've been thinking about it. We've been getting this all wrong. We've been putting our thumbs on the scale. This is not the spirit of the Ben's choice. The spirit of the Ben's choice is him pulling out something we would never think of. I was like, Ben chooses. Yes.

Ben's choice. Because you were kind of doing the, what do you guys think? Like, this, that, what should we do? You were throwing it to the group, and I said, that's Like this, that, like what should we do? You know, you were, you were, you've thrown it to the group. And I said, that's not the spirit of this. That's not the spirit.

You choose. And you sit, you know, so I said this to you. I said like Ben's choice, sit down. And you were like, all right, well, let me think. And this is often the state of the Ben's choice is he pitches a couple movies that feel like safe picks. I like the Simpsons movie. Yeah.

I like, I like, uh, don't look back. Sure. That's come up many times. I like Don't Look Back. Right. Which would be fun. Right. And we go, Ben, what's the real Ben's pick? And then it's like he closes his eyes,

he goes into another space, and he pulls a title you never could predict out of the ether. And that title happened to be... Well, you gave us three options. No, but he didn't really. No.

Because this was the first thing he said and we were like, what? He gave us this one and two buffer options he said like i would also do my cousin vinny and what was the third one i can't even remember it doesn't matter it was all i was hearing at that point was like it didn't matter the thing was i was like ben you know you're supposed to choose it's ben's choice yes so what do you want and i was partly saying like look if it's one of these two movies just pick one sure but i was also like it's ben's choice. Yes. So what do you want? And I was partly saying like, look, if it's one of these two movies, just pick one. Sure. But I was also like,

it's Ben's choice. And you sit down and get our voices out of your ears. And you just said, I love you to death. And I was like, what? Right.

And Griffin was like, what? But I also was like, of course. No, but we were both like, I was surprised, but immediately it's like, this makes perfect sense

well yeah it does make sense because it's it's it checks all the boxes when you compare it to past uh ben's choices and that it's uh you know a sketch comedian vehicle uh-huh for tracy for tracy it's a movie about an incredibly confident moron Which I feel like is a big That is often I never really thought of it that way Like a violently confident moron Action cinema's most confident moron Steven Seagal

Has been represented in Ben's Choice Yes You have You know I love You know Men Who Knew Too Little That's a very confident moron

Yes I suppose Clifford I wouldn't call Clifford a moron He's kind of a genius. Joe Dirt is similarly. Yes, Joe Dirt. Absolutely. But the heart of a poet, Joe Dirt, of course.

Yeah. And Fletch, well, he's not a moron. No, Fletch is actually very smart and he's working overtime. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So.

But you just look at. Guile, kind of a confident moron. Oh, yeah. You look at any poster for this movie from... There's several floating around there between, like, the VHS poster, you know, the cover, the DVD, the theatrical poster. All of this lineup of faces,

the cast of this movie, the way they're styled, and the expressions they're making, all surrounding... Usually there's a pizza somewhere in the poster oh yeah it just feels like such a ben thing as you said to me the other day this is just one of those movies i watched five times in one summer pretty much yeah it was because it was on tv it was on comedy central yeah so right a few people since i've learned that you

wanted to do this have said i've said we're doing an episode i love you to death they've all been like oh i love that movie hell yeah like why do you love that movie who are these not angry name them put them on the wall of honor it's the opposite of a black list it's a green list and i think it's always the same answer of like yeah that movie was on tv all the time sure yeah um although one of my friends watched it during a Klein-a-thon. Okay. Which I was also intrigued to hear about. Like, she was like, oh, no, during COVID, me and my roommate, we watched every fucking Klein movie. Yeah. And imagine this really pops in a Klein-a-thon.

Was that a first watch for them or was it a re-kline? I think that was a first watch. David, give me... Was that a first watch for them or was it a re-kline? David? Sure you don't want me to talk over that. David, was that a first watch for them or was it a recline? Shall we recline?

And then they're both in Barka loungers. Yes. Going all the way back. They don't even look at the movie. Yeah. Oh, I love you to death. Even look at the movie? Yeah.

Oh, I Love You to Death. My joke to you at the moment you picked this movie was, I just imagined the 90s basic cable meeting. Yes. Where they're like, all right, you know, who wants it? Jurassic Park, bids like crazy, right? And then like, it's hour eight, and they're like, I Love You to Death, and Comedy Central's like, I'll give you 10 bucks.

And they're like, yep, that's fine, all right. You know, like the pile of vhs's is down for the last few right yes i mean look a lot of the movies you pick for ben's choices are films that you saw many many times on tv rotation you talk about the porch classics and the vhs's but a lot of these are these are being programmed on cable i mean I did see this on a porch. Okay. In Florida. Wow. This is a twist we didn't know was coming. This is a grandma porch.

A grandma porch. But she didn't own it. It was on TV. It was on TV. Rocking chair? Did you like go to see your grandma? Adirondack chair. Oh, I love an Adirondack chair. That's a recline. That's a recline. Those things are at an angle. And imagine the physical comedy Kevin could do

if you put him in one of those bad boys. I'm just... Did you get to your grandma's house and she was like, do you want to watch a movie? And you're like, why is your TV inside? And she was like, oh, right. Lugged it out to the porch. No, my grandma,

they lived in a trailer park. Oh. So they had to, had to. And they had a, you know, this screened in porch where they did most of their watching.

I mean, Florida though, it's hot. Hot. Yeah. A hot TV. Hot to the touch. Yeah, exactly.

Right. That TV, 90s TV, that thing's going. It's warm. Black remote control must have burned your thingies if you tried to change channels. There's a ceiling fan and they eventually got it closed

in. They got it air conditioned. Remember how like the old TVs, but though you put your hand near them and it would start to fuzz? Yeah, like the static noise. Oh, I love that. It'll make your hair kind of stand out. Give you a creamer. Yo, one time, or this is actually a thing I did many times, is if you found a TV on the side of the road,

we would pick it up, drive it to the dump. I didn't litter, but it was really cool to throw them. Oh, yeah, just to smash them. And watch them explode. Oh, sure. Yeah. My friend, I remember this very clearly, got a new toilet once right

in his house and had to get rid of the old toilet and the plumber was like yeah just you know you gotta smash it and then throw it away cool and he was like how do i smash it and the plumber's like easy i'll tell you what you're gonna do is you're gonna lift it up and then you're gonna throw it down he was like wait are you serious the plumber was like yeah that's what you gotta do and he was like it was most satisfied smashing of my life smashed a toilet i just you know i didn't realize that it was that easy to smash a toilet well they made a porcelain yeah i don't think it was an old toilet right it's probably like if you sat hard enough could you smash with your ass well i i mean this is a tangent i don't i mean that ben do you want to

talk about the movie at all the show twitter is barely usable at this point hours just on that if we really want to dig into that oh man i just got a cursed email from good people at universal okay trolls band together together critic screenings Some people have messaged us That there's a new pop-up experience For Trolls Band together Oh, you guys gotta go The word gotta Definitely does not need to be deployed right now

I think we gotta No, I think you have to I think it's required I think we must What was I going to say? Could you smash your toilet? I think you would need to be remarkably heavy to do that. I think it's, well, again, tweeting the show.

If you were high enough in the air and you came down. That's got to hurt, though. Yeah, you have to have a hard ass. There was a point during the pandemic where I was really, you know, I was putting my toilet to work. Oh, God. And I started really, you know, I was putting my toilet to work. Oh, God. And I started noticing, like, creaking sounds. Like, I never broke it, but it was like, I haven't gained weight. I've, in fact, lost weight in lockdown.

I clearly am just shitting too hard. Wow. That this is starting to put strain on the thing. The point is. The point is. There are certain types of movies. I had this phenomenon as a child.

I don't know if you felt this way as well, Ben, but I remember like sometimes being on my fourth watch of some movie that was just constantly in rotation

on my favorite channels and turning to my dad and being like, is this movie a classic? Because they're airing it on TV as if it's important. Yes, sure. As if it's the Wizard of Oz and TV as if it's important. Yes. As if it's the Wizard of Oz.

Yeah. And they just know it's going to hit. And he was just like, no, this is like no one really cared about this when it came out. Like, I didn't understand the concept of what you're saying, David, of just like either this movie came in a bundle. Right. With like four other movies that people wanted the rights for at that channel. And they also had to take this fifth one or comedy center.

I think often, especially in like the nineties would just be like, give us the titles. No one else wants. Exactly. We'll pay you nothing. We need to fill space. But the name of the network is comedy central.

And so comedy, it was central to their central business to, to, to all of us. This is the center of American comedy is every film we position. That's where you're going to see those kinds of movies. So yes, absolutely.

A hundred percent. I was like, well, I know who Tracy Ullman is because I know that The Simpsons started on her show. Yes. So I knew that much. Right. And I just, yeah, assumed that this was just like a fun i mean i also like dark like black you know comedies like this felt like a little movie about

murder yeah this felt like a little kind of you know like uh fucked up you know like a fucked up movie look so i was excited by that. We've talked about this. We've covered some films that fall into this category. But this thing of like big studio, all-star ensemble, pitch black comedies about crime and or murder. Right. That flop so hard. Yeah.

And audiences respond by saying like, fuck you. How dare you? Why would you think I'd like that? Right. This movie did not do very well. No. It made $15 million. That's more than I make.

Yeah, that's true. And it was in 1990. I didn't make any money in 1990. I was an active drag on my family, actually. I was losing money in 1990. But, you know, they were feeding me peanut butter and jelly or whatever the hell. This didn't look like it cost a lot. No, but it's got a big cast.

And it's like Owen Roisman shot it. Andy Coates cut it. Because it's made by, at that time, still a major director. We have a lot of careers to talk about in this episode. Oh, my God. Yeah. I mean, but here's the thing. Yeah.

Because we should just get into business at hand. Yeah. But just to sort of wrap up on our preface, I mean, I think what works out with this movie is it has a lot of avenues for us to explore. Ben, you do not have to, for one second, defend your choice of I Love You to Death. One of the great films, obviously. Obviously.

Watching this movie, it felt like trying to lead the the jfk investigation like from the assassination where i'm just like all these threads here that i need to like follow in different places like every two minutes something would happen on screen that would make me like spiral off into right hold on hold on hold on you can't just bring that in and sometimes it's textual within the film itself sometimes Sometimes it's thinking about, like, what was this person doing at this point in their career? How did this movie get made?

But just, I just gotta say that this was such a comfort to revisit. Yeah. I had not watched it in a long time. Truly, I think I hadn't really revisited it since the summer of like i love you to death yeah and they don't make beautiful summer they don't make comedies like this anymore they certainly they just really don't they straight up don't make movies like it's like so broad that's a good question it's so um there's like something about it's like it's so

fucking simple i i just this movie is simple it's so fucking simple. I just. This movie is simple. That's true. It's so fucking simple and basic. I like that it was just like, I like that it's just this very straightforward farce. And it's not like. Farce is the word. And you could see this being adapted from a play on the West End. Yeah, that's possible.

It almost makes more sense than it being adapted from a real true crime story i know which is crazy too but like how much of this movie just takes place basically in the bedroom with different characters like running in and running out and doing different shit and a situation escalating in a very controlled way. Yes. Yeah. You're right about everything you're saying. I'm just looking up current black comedies, but, like, it's, you know, I'm trying to find, like, recent examples, right? But it's giving me things like Promising Young Woman,

which is barely a comedy. Yes. And obviously is, like, a movie that is trying to make a very blunt, allegorical point. The Coen brothers are the people who have been the best at doing this type of thing, but they do it in a more elevated way and less commercially. Not really doing it right now. Right.

And we've talked about... Clooney sort of tried to imitate them once. It didn't really work. We've talked about DeVito was one of the only guys who was able to make these movies work with a mainstream public. But then even by death to Smoochie, he got the full fuck you, how dare you treatment and was scared off of making movies. This movie is like bullshit and i say that fondly yes so like something like you know black klansman or promising young woman or summer who bought you

those are like what we're talking about allegorical films the political films you know something like i mean lucky numbers which we've covered on the show a simple favor again it's like yes that movie has like comic tone sort of but that's being presented more as a drama like it's like a melodrama no what was the other one I was just thinking very bad things well that's from like 25 years ago no no I'm not talking present day I'm trying to think of this I mean the menu that's what I was thinking the menu is closer but it has like a press machine to it triangle you know what i guess this kind of does too in its cast and like you say like crew but it doesn't really in its tone triangle of sadness it also feels like it feels like the

mixed nuts thing where they're like we're pitching this to the malls of america right they're not like we're doing something really elevated and sophisticated here this feels like everyone involved being like i just want to have fun and then they're building that uh vehicle for fun around like incredibly dark shit yeah and then being surprised that people don't go for it other than ben rediscovering it this is not a perfect comparison but cocaine bear obviously that was more of like an action horror comedy yeah it's very violent and but that is kind of like this where it's like we've vaguely ripped something from the headlines yeah which this is vaguely ripped from there you're right yeah and like we've got a bunch of actors you know and a bunch of silly stuff is going to happen and you are not

going to take it seriously cocaine bear has more i more, I mean, it's got the unique thing of the sort of post-modern pre-memification of the movie kind of thing. And also, you didn't see Cocaine Bear, did you, Ben? I did not. My big hit on Cocaine Bear, a movie that I think drinks duck piss. It's not very good. Is that it's basically like a trauma movie made by someone who's never watched a trauma movie.

Oh, that sucks. Yeah. There's just something off about that movie. Yes. Which sort of, and I don't think it's like the worst movie I've ever seen. Yeah. But I didn't like it. And I was kind of like, this proves that this is hard to do.

I also think that movie is trying to like shock the audience into like, I can't believe they put this in a movie. Whereas movies like Lucky Numbers, Very Bad Things, like Love You to Death, you know, whatever scale of like bad taste they're playing in. They're also like, we believe we can frame these situations in a way that is guilt free comedy. Right. Where you're like the provisionality of the situation just leads to laughs. We're not trying to challenge you. And are always like why am i laughing about this my grandma could see any of those movies maybe not very bad things yeah that's the most extreme one drowning mona drowning mona one night at mccool's yeah oh yeah ice harvest i'm thinking about movies

that are like all-star casts and murders involved and all the tone of that your grandma's there in the mall seeing this movie and going like oh this is unbelievable how dare they yeah but she's not that mad she's like oh with the ms sugar you know he had it coming that dirty dog right so you know god bless a movie like i love you to death existing um but i think what's also why it does partly exist because of the man who made it i'm i assume well this is the other thing i want to say laurence larry kasdan laurence kasdan a director who certainly qualifies as a blank check director what's his blank check i don't disagree with you what's his blank check is wider yeah yeah yeah but um but like dream catcher is a fucking blank check but that has a king

like wider person being like i want to make a wider movie it's going to be long and expensive and studios being like we don't okay i mean i think just costars a cosigner and wider in the same way that king is for dream catcher yeah I'd say Silverado's a certain kind of blank check, especially considering it's a dormant genre at that point. Beyond that, Silverado's just like, you've made two hits now, and you've written a bunch of them. What do you want to do? Ben, how much do you know about Larry Kasten's career?

I don't know very much. So his first produced screenplay is The Empire Strikes Back. That is correct? Have you heard of it? He is a guy who's like writing scripts. That's episode, I want to say, four? Five. Five.

He is a guy who is like a hot screenwriter who hasn't gotten a project made yet, right? Yeah. And Lucas is like, I'm aware that I need to step back, let other people direct these Star Wars movies, let other people write them, and just sort of oversee them. And he hires Lawrence Kasdan to write The Empire Strikes Back. A guy who's like,

I don't know sci-fi. That's what he talks like. He does talk like that. He talks like that. But remember, Kasdan had already written another script. Well, Lucas hires him because he had written

Raiders of the Lost Ark, which comes out after Empire, but they had that script. Spielberg discovered Kasdan. Yeah, okay, so how did they discover him? It's called Continental Divide, and it was eventually directed by Michael Apte and stars John Belushi.

Yes, yes. Never seen it. I haven't either, but that was John Belushi trying to sell him as a more straight-laced romantic leading man right i think it's supposed to be fine he but he's he's like a comedy spec writer right who then spielberg and lucas discover and are like we want you to write indiana jones and star wars and he nails both of them yeah two scripts that are just jones the first one

holy shit yeah he's like he like, we have this content. I mean, obviously that movie's also written by Philip Kaufman, right? But in both cases, because Empire Strikes Back starts out as the couple, I'm forgetting their name. The Brackets. Lee Bracket is obviously the other credited writer. In both cases, it was like ideas that were developed by Spielberg and Lucas. They hire people to write them. They're like, these scripts aren't working.

Here's this guy. Yeah, they need help. Right. He's got this good spec script and he gets like full credit for saving both of those movies and like contributing the things that everyone loves about them it is not his background he's like i don't know genre stuff and he writes these two scripts where people are like well you could like teach classes on these films this is the model that everyone's working off of in writing blockbuster films this is the ideal in terms of like the balance of humor and story structure and drama and all of that.

So like he's now like the most valuable screenwriter in Hollywood, despite these two projects basically being outside of his wheelhouse. He talks like this. Yeah, he talks like that. But that gives him the blank check to start making his own movies. He's from Miami. Body Heat comes out the same year as Raiders. Body Heat. Have you heard of Body Heat, Ben?

No. You'd probably dig it. It's a good movie. Body Heat rules. It's like a neo-noir with Kathleen Turner. It comes out the same year as Raiders and Continental Divide. Wow. Looking at pictures of her in this.

He's. Whew. Yeah. This is a movie it is a hot movie but even this is a pivot of like the the raiders empire guy beyond that it's him being like hey i want to do like a steamy neo-noir that's essentially i mean it's a remake of double identity like you know like, you know, an old-fashioned noir. But they fuck in this movie. They really fuck. Rather than it being... The sex is textual. Right. All under the surface. And that's not particularly

cool genre. No. But he makes it cool. That movie's a huge hit. He, you know, toddles back over to fucking, you know, California, to Northern California and writes Return of the Jedi. Just farts it out. You know, he is, considers himself kind of like the auteur of Han Solo. Like, he's like, that's really my character.

Like, is, you know, like, whatever. Because to jump ahead, he ultimately becomes the main creative force on the Solo movie. Right. Which is him being like, I'm reclaiming my boy oh uh you know i write the dialogue for him better than anyone blah blah blah um do you think that he went into it thinking that you would have to keep keep it cold freezing the coaxium yeah i mean i mean or maybe do you think he was like Luke Warren We should make it clear He's also the father Of coaxium His baby

But like I mean He got the idea Because in 1983 When he wrote Return of the Jedi He also wrote and directed A film called The Big Chill

Oh right He'd written Body Heat first And he was getting A little sweaty Can someone turn on A fan in here Still not working I guess I have to write

The Big Chill I wanna chill out Have you seen The Big Chill I have And it was something I watched with my parents Just like They loved to write The Big Chill. I want to chill out. Have you seen The Big Chill? I have, and it was something I watched with my parents. Just like they loved...

Seminal Baby Boomer. Yeah, yeah. The Boomer classic. They love that movie. It has a fantastic soundtrack. Right, a famous soundtrack. Just mopey white adults listening to Motown,

and everyone's like, finally a movie for us. He's spoken to us. He's captured the moment. It's a good movie. Yes, and also... I'm pro-chill. Here's the other thing with casting.

He always was putting together unbelievable ensemble casts. So the big chill has William Hurt again, much like Body Heat, and it's got a lot of other great actors. Klein, Goldblum.

Kevin Kline, who he's going to carry over. Tom Berenger, Mary Kay Place, Meg Tilly, Joe Buck Williams. Kevin Costner, a corpse in deleted scenes.

He's not in the film. In deleted scenes, I said. We've never seen them. I didn't say seen deleted scenes. He's, I've, a lot of big chill nerds,

I think, are like, Did it ever happen? Does he have to, no, no, they exist, but like, does he have to die for us to see this scene?

Oh, interesting. Because the big chill, I believe, ended with this super long scene where you finally see Costner. Sure. Like the, it's sort of like the end

of the godfather yeah part two or whatever it's like and now we'll finally let you see the guy at the end of talking about right where you finally see and kasdan was like i loved the scene costner's good nip but like it's not the right completely fucking deflates the movie right and so they just and that movie actually has a weirdly abrupt ending they didn't even put it on like the criterion they've never let it out yeah and i think it's kind of kaz and being like i feel like it would be mean to costner to do this or whatever but like i'd love to see it but this kazdan like develops really strong relationships with movie stars a he's like discovering a lot of people at like the moment they're about to pop and be those people just clearly they come back to him over and over again

they love working with him so he's just always assembling like absurd amounts of talent um so after but like notice he's he's gotten this like lucasfilm sort of guarantor and then he's like great i'm off to the races making the types of movies for grown-ups movies for grown-ups that i want i'm not trying to like cash in on the fucking like the the blockbuster shit i'm not picking up those rewrite jobs because he could at least not publicly he could easily both i mean i had no idea both those are have you heard of them those are massive films okay yeah they did all right yeah but no instead he does big heat and big chill and it's like okay this guy is the finger on the pulse of 80s yuppies who are, you know, who we care about right now.

And he wants to make, like, adult character dialogue-driven dramedies and then, like, go to sort of dead genres like the noir, the western. Right. So, right. Next, he's like, I want to make a western. He makes Silverado. It stars Kevin Kline and Kevin Costner. Danny Glover.

He casts Costner literally as an apology. Costner's very hot in that movie. That is the role that Costner credits with making his entire career. But it's not a hit. It's his first whiff. It gets good reviews but doesn't do well at the box office so it's kind of seen as taking the shot. Is a good movie.

I've never liked it. I think it's a lot of fun. I mean it it's pretty fun i watched it being like here we go baby and then i was like oh this is okay and i should maybe i'll try it again sometime then he makes the accidental tourist in 1988 which i have never seen me neither uh which we might you know uh william hurt once again the big hurt kathleen turner from uh Body Heat Again Gina Davis wins an Oscar Gina Davis Gets her right as she's popping Peaking She's kind of a manic pixie dream girl prototype in that movie I think And she wins an Oscar

So he's done He's had a good 80s Right? We can all agree Yeah He starts out with three of the biggest blockbusters The turn of the decade coming Right

Yeah exactly Three big blockbusters Two big hits Yeah Two interesting Two interesting... Two interesting movies, one of which won an Oscar. Yeah.

Right? Like, doing okay. Yeah. He's forever, in my opinion, he will forever be considered a screenwriter first. Yes. But he's a decent director. He is.

And he's in that... I mean, Levinson's very much a parallel to him at this time, you know? Okay. These guys who, yeah, start out as writers, kind of learn directing on their feet, but like have a series of films where they're just like kind of connecting with the public by and large. And their whiffs are small scale enough that people kind of grant it to them. Right.

Especially when they can always attract such big stars. Right. That it's like they're never going to have a really tough time getting their movies financed. So why does he then take a script he did not write? Yes. About a pizza, a horny pizza man who doesn't get his comeuppance, I guess. Sort of does, but. Who cannot be killed.

An unkillable, horny Tacoma pizza man. Let's make this clear. A non-supernatural comedy about a horny pizza man who can't be killed. That's based on a true story. Based on a true story. Yes, of sorts. A sort of... At least a woman was arrested for trying to kill her husband.

A hit gone wrong. Yeah. Right. Right. I mean, the baseline of the true story is, Ben, you sent us the real news clipping yesterday. Yeah. Because recently there was some article about how 57 years later they're still together. They're still together. They haven't split up.

They figured it out. This movie was right. This movie was right. The ending of this movie is correct. He loved her to death. But yeah. He will. He still does. He's continuing to. But it's based on this true story

where this scorned woman hired teens to murder her cheating husband. When I think teen, I think William Hurt in 1990. Hey, hey.

Sorry, carry on. And they tried five different times and a lot of the ways are portrayed in this movie. Tried to hit him with a baseball bat. Tried to blow up his car. And then eventually they shot him twice.

Right. And. Neither one took. And neither one took. And it's because his wife had given him all of these sleeping pills, which slowed down his heart and kept him alive. So a lot of the elements of this real life story are in this script. It's not an inherently funny story, but you can see how someone like running down the

hallway with a newspaper clip and goes like, this sounds like real life Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck, you know, or like Wile E. Coyote and Roadrunner. They keep on like doing these things to him and he's surviving all of them. Yeah, 100%. And just, you know, yeah, just picture someone in the room being like, and the craziest part of all,

it's a real story! And they're like passing around the newspaper and like, you know. And he lived so it's not dark. They ended up together. You have this sort of like uplift. It's a love story with a weird twist, you know, whatever. But yes, I get that. uplift it's a weird twist you know whatever but yes i get that but it's just odd that he directed correct and him directing it i think means he gets

a big cast like yes because it's larry caston everyone he wants like he gets top picks of hollywood i'm noticing someone he didn't get oh an italian american actor that is true there is david what scanning up and down a jeweler i've got my jeweler's loop he's taking a time tv my my eye got very big in it you can see like a cartoon not seeing any italians now when i was a young boy yeah and i watched this yeah i found the performance to be um sort of noticeably a little big a little big yeah so i remember even at the time being like is this the pizza box man come to life he's also bronzed yeah yeah he is his hair too his they must have dyed his chest hair.

And it's not like he's a fair-haired man to begin with. No, but he is like... And he's... He's a reedy Midwestern wasp. Like, I think he actually, one of his parents is Catholic or whatever, and his dad is Jewish. But he reads waspy. And maybe it's that later in life he really got cast as a lot of like stuffy guys but even look at how kasdan's used him up until this point you know yeah i mean he's charismatic

and italians are charismatic i love klein you can see him doing the calculation kasdan right like i love klein i've worked with him twice this guy can do anything and then you combine that with this is only coming a couple years after Fish Called Wanda, which he wins the Oscar for. And you go like, if you have that guy playing this character the way he played the character in Fish Called Wanda, it probably works.

On paper, you can see that calculation, right? You're like, that is the archetype of what this guy should be like. A sort of like charming, horny doofus. I assume you've seen a fish called one yes auto is that his character auto is his name uh he thought the london underground was a political movement one of my favorite uh jokes an incredible performance it is an incredible kind of infamously one of the only like pure comedic performances to win an oscar yep in what was sort of a surprise win but it was like this thing is just so virtuosic and the guy is just such like different clans like one of those actors where i'm like you're a craftsman you like understand how to act in such

like detail that is true yes that is true but he's also unbelievably hot in that movie yes like he's all in black he's got the stash he is like stupidly handsome he's also unbelievably hot in that movie. Yes. Like, he's all in black. He's got the stache. He is, like, stupidly handsome. He's really, really good looking. Yeah. And in the 80s, he was pretty bulletproof on that front. Yes. Again, later he has become a man that Clickhole can do a parody of him saying,

my velvet's about the disappearance of his rare velvet's. My favorite Clickhole joke of all time. But, like, you know you know like in the 2000s on it's like yeah he's cole porter he wears a cravat like that's his vibe but in the 80s it was like he's a rascal yes you want to fuck like he's cool yeah i mean in the big chill he's kind of nebbishy i guess sure because he's like sort of you know but he's still hot in it and silverado like i mean like sophie's choice and uh when he did pirates of, you know, but he's still hot in it. And Silverado. Like, I mean, like, Sophie's Choice and when he did Pirates of Penzance and stuff.

All that was playing on him being smoking. He's really good in Pirates of Penzance. That was obviously his breakout. He was part of the first ever class of Juilliard, Ben. Yeah. Group one, as they call it. Yes. He was a Juilliard guy. He was a total hottie.

And he's playing an Italian guy in this movie. And so I'm just Googling here for Italian-American war of the 90s. Not seeing one. Why did the Republic of Italy not declare war on our sovereign nation after seeing this film? After this movie. Like what international court would stop them? Were they busy? Hey, we declare war on you.

It's like, oh, why? It's like, this movie. You think you can slip this by us? You do not display us with this sensitivity. This is an offensive stereotype. Yeah, it's pretty bad. So you've got Kevin Kline. Yes.

Okay, he's playing an Italian guy. Yeah. Now, Tracy Ullman is actually playing a... Yugoslavian woman. Right, she's like a Serbo-Croat or whatever, right? Because that's what her mom is. Right. So you have two greats.

As is Joan Plowright. Of course, neither of them are that. I think Ullman has some Slavic... She might. Yeah, Joan Plowright probably. I just want to get this out of the way, and I'm going to get the order wrong, but just the faces on the poster

and the names above the title for this movie are Kevin Kline, Tracy Ullman, Joan Plowright, River Phoenix, William Hurt, Keanu Reeves. That feels like a Mad Libs cast in a way that is astonishing and is such a fascinating time capsule of where all of those people's different careers are at that time.

Not just that. It's like River and Keanu are going to do My Own Private Idaho together the next year. William Hurt. Why the hell is he in this? Well, it's a Larry Kasdan movie. Larry Kasdan made this movie? Yeah, Larry Kasdan made this movie. Trace Elman, Polish descent.

Joan Plowright, of course, also had another name at that point. You guys know what it was? What? The Lady Olivier. Because, of course she is lawrence olivier's wife what and you think she was like going home and lawrence was like how are you doing my dear and she's like yeah well another day on the fucking you know let's kill the pizza man movie you want to read these sides uh she's unbelievable in this movie to be

i think mvp i like she's fair i think i feel like she's just someone i've seen so much it just like she's just solid but like she was a great young british actor she most famous for a taste of honey uh you know like when she was young and all that but like uh she became you know she would usually play like a stuffy lady who's like oh i say you know like that was kind of her deal in the 80s and 90s yes i was gonna like sort of yeah when olivier dies she starts like being like i will be mr wilson's wife in uh dennis the man well i'm realizing olivier had died a year before this movie she probably made it in tribute to him he never got to see it it's the real tragedy the real tragedy is olivier never got to it he's like sitting in his tragedy. The real tragedy is Olivier never got to attend

the premiere. He's like sitting in his armchair like, okay, Larry, let me throw on Comedy Central for you.

Which number is it again? Because she does Enchanted April the year after this. Which she gets an Oscar nomination for. Which she probably was seen as,

I think, maybe the front runner and loses, of course, to Marisa Tomei. Marisa Tomei. Marisa. But she's great in this movie. Yeah. frontrunner and loses, of course, to Marissa Tomei. Marissa Tomei. But she's great in this movie.

Yeah. Hurt and Reeves as stoned hitmen. They are the MVPs. I mean, they might be the... They're probably the most remembered characters. They are incredible in this film, and it is astonishing that you can say the last 30 minutes, William Hurt and Keanu reeves enter this

movie and they are on the exact same wavelength to think about where those two guys are in their careers at this moment fundamentally different actors oh fundamentally different places yeah in 1990 and you're like they come in and they are in lockstep they are somehow meeting right in the middle so in sync it feels like keanu is being keanu right like parenthood but the best version of keanu at this time we're like three three out of every five steps he takes are the wrong steps and then the two right steps are people being like fuck we can't give up on him yet but he's good he gets it it feels like william hurt just turned a dial in his brain yes and synced up with him or whatever like that it magically just he's just like in the drift

together they're like piloting a jaeger together they are so good they are i was watching this the first 15 minutes i'm like obviously this fits into the hosley canon, right? I get it. Horny dumb pizza man. It begins with pizza dough spinning in the air like that revolving sandwiches tumbler. It begins with him in a confessional saying, I can't stop

sticking my dick in people. I fuck everyone. How many times have you committed adultery? Today? I don't know, seven? Right. And then as you said,

the opening credits happen over like flying pizza dough spinning. And then, as you said, the opening credits happen over, like, flying pizza dough, spinning, and then there's, like, ten minutes... Italy is already drafting the war legislation at this point, right? Like, ten minutes where he fucks Victoria Jackson, Kevin Kline's real-life wife, Phoebe Cates,

and Heather Graham. Heather Graham. I didn't recognize the actress who throws the hat at him out the window, which is maybe my favorite gag of the movie but then it becomes this extended like almost like death becomes her he won't stay dead bit right yeah and i'm watching it and i'm like i'm kind of losing the total hansley thread on it and then when hurt and reeves enter i'm like passed into law right right

right right this break out the the hammer and chisel because you can put this into marble uh ben i'm assuming as a young boy how old you were are you in that that that's sweltering florida summer i gotta be seven or eight. Perfect. Was it Hurt and Reeves who you were... Right, right. You were most rooting for. Because on Comedy Central, you might...

Yes! You weren't, like, pointing a plow right and being like, did you know she was married to Laurence Olivier? No. No, you weren't pointing a... I was pointing at Keanu's nose ring and being like, everything about this... I wish to look like this.

Yes, exactly. I was like, mom, can I shave my head like that? His haircut is so good. It's so good. It's very good. Very good haircut. He looks so hot. Yeah.

And William Hurt looks like... He's an unbelievably beautiful man. William Hurt looks like he's part of the original writing staff of SNL. William Hurt looks like one of the lone gunmen from The X-Files. The raggedy one, to be clear. But, like, as you're saying, Keanu is, like, he's doing the thing that he has been doing best at this point in time. Like, he's working in a Bill and Ted parenthood vein, as you said. Yeah, it's 1990.

Like, his first movie is what, like, River's Edge or Youngblood, which is like 86, right? He's only been making movies for a couple years. Right. But he's already done Bill and Ted. Sat on the shelf for a while, but comes out in 89. Is that right? 89. Yeah.

Parenthood is what, 87? Is that right? I can't remember. Is Parenthood the same year as Bill and Ted, I think? It might be. You're right, 89. Yeah. So, yeah yeah you know

he's he's he's he's a baby he's brand new i mean he was born in 64 so he's what in this movie he's 26 years old you know i just think this is interestingly the performance where it's like he's combining the like spacey keanu comedy type with just the right amount of the like river's edge edge but look meanwhile William Hurt is an Oscar winner yes like and like leading man yeah like every movie he does in the 80s is a leaning like it's like altered states body heat big chill Gorky Park kiss the spider woman wins an Oscar right children of a lesser god broadcast another nomination yeah accidental tours and a movie called a time of Destiny, which no one remembers, but he's the lead of that too.

Like, that's his 80s. He's not doing shit like this. No. Now, obviously, he knows Kazda. Yes. But even still, he's an obvious choice to cast in this role. As you said in the real story, both of them are teenagers. And he's like, what if one of the teenagers is William Hurd?

And he's like, what if one of the teenagers is William Hurt? A guy who you don't think of for character comedy. Yeah. And he's always playing these kind of refined guys, you know? Right. But, yeah, he probably was just like, yeah, let me at it, right? Let me play. I'll have fun. Yeah.

He grew his hair out and he was looking for some way to use it he's doing a william hurt-esque performance to me like where it's like you say like there's a lot of very conscious choices yes this is a very committed performance yes he's not just like yeah fuck it i'll you know i'll have long hair and be silly like that's easy there's an ebert quote that's really good uh let's keep talking i'll pull this up is it on the wikipedia page i think so he calls this movie an actor's dream he says william hurt could have walked through the role of the spaced out hitman but takes the time to make the character believable and even in a bleary way complex is that the quote yeah i kind of agree yeah god when he keeps trying to look at like walk around

joey and look at the, his back. Yeah. After he shot him. Yeah. Just him looking at stuff is funny in this movie. Yeah. But they come in very late. And it's also, okay.

It's also hard to play drugged out and, and it be without feeling like just like stupid. Yeah. And like obvious. Yeah. Yeah. Like it's really easy to just be like, you're some teenager at a party who's pretending like he's really easy To just be like You're some teenager At a party

Who's pretending Like he's really stoned Right Yeah But yeah No opening Kevin Kline Spinning the pizza

Hitting on every woman Devo River Phoenix A performance I would say That feels like he is Almost unaware That he is in a comedy He's playing like

Full sort of River Phoenix Earnest Dramatic intensity which is kind of what he did like i mean i love river phoenix and i love pretty much any movie he ever made i mean you look at how few films he got to make yeah and the list of directors he worked with right even if it wasn't always their best film and it it's pretty absurd. You know, Joe Dante, Rob Reiner, your favorite director. Peter Weir.

Spielberg. You know, Sidney Lumet. Yeah. Spielberg, obviously. Richard Benjamin, who's a pretty big director back then. Larry Kasdan, Gus Van Sant, Phil Alden Robinson. Peter Bogdanovich. Peter Bogdanovich.

Like, he's never uninteresting in a movie. Every single one of those performances is either good or at least, like, you pay attention to it. You know what I mean? Like, if it's a smaller role or something. He was like the Chalamet of that moment. Yeah.

He's better than Chalamet. Yeah. Oh, he's definitely better than Chalamet. I mean, I like Chalamet. It's a similar position where it's like, he's a heartthrob. He's taken seriously as an actor. He already has an Oscar nomination under his belt by the age of like 20.

And he's taking on a lot of roles where it's like him playing Junior to a major leading man of the moment. In that way where it feels like studios used to sort of develop careers. It's a thing they talk about in sort of the inverse of it and once upon a time in hollywood of like we're gonna pair you up with a redford a ford a poitier to sort of like establish you color of money style as like there's a baton being passed here you're the next generation you will graduate to being one of these guys. Right. This is the oddest use of him in any movie that he made. He's, you don't need him. No.

Like, you've already got the stoned hitman, right? Yes. But he's good. But he's good. He's such a chiller in it. Yeah. And I like, I like. He's kind of a sweetie pie.

He's a sweetie pie. And he's also, it's like the way he's playing it, I think it lends itself to making it more believable that he is like really into tracy allman's character like adores tracy allman he works at the pizza parlor he observes all the sort of wandering eye shit that klein is doing which allman frames as like he likes to look at women women like to look at him my joey would never do anything. Right.

It's, you know, price to do a business. He's such a good pizza man. Yeah. Right. Everybody loves coming here. He's a great dad. Right. Again, this is set in Tacoma. Yeah.

He loves delivering the pizzas himself and also doing pro bono handyman work. Well, he owns the building. So he's the landlord. Right. But he does it for other people's buildings. Because she's always like, you never fix anything in our building. My mom has to fix everything.

Her mom is there, of course. Nadja, played by Joan Plowright. What else is, yeah, what else do we need to know? There's the cops. We meet them immediately. James Gammon and Jack Keller, right? Those guys are... Two great characters.

Right. Slabowski's landlord. Jack Keller, everyone knows him as Slabowski's landlord. Which makes a lot of sense that he retired and then went on to become a landlord. But you must, come on, you know James Gammon. Do I? He's the coach in Major League. Oh, yeah.

And he was born to be a baseball coach. That guy should only play baseball coaches and like lawmen. Like that's his trade. Is he still alive,ames gammon i know um no he lost gammon we lost both of them fairly recently he died gammon died in 2010 okay he was 70 years old yeah could have gotten you know 20 more years at gammon we should have uh keller just you're right last year 22 died at the age of 75 but but devo which is the name of phoenix's character yes is like getting really angry on behalf of Tracy Ullman

that she won't wake up and acknowledge it. And as I said, in this first 10 minutes, you see Klein on some side, one side or the other of coitus with three or four different women. You see his tush, too. You see his tush. I mean, damn.

A real snack. Butt corner? Corner tush? No, butt corner. Should real snack. Butt corner? Corner tush? No, butt corner. Should we do a butt corner? Oh, sure. What do we think? Good?

Very good. Well-defined. Well-defined. He's looking good in his slacks. Kevin Kline is in good shape at this point, I feel like, as well. You know what I mean? Like, he's just, he's a trim guy. He's got a great head of hair yeah on his chest yeah and and no no makeup is implied to his skin at all i'm sure this is

natural right right yeah i mean yeah he he went completely method it looks like they locked him in a glass box box on the beach yeah two weeks. Yes. And he emerged like this. Yeah. His accent is not perfect, unless there's a Tacoma Italian-American accent I'm unaware of. Look, I am a huge fan of his work. I think he's given many immaculate performances. This is one where if I were Larry Kasdan, I would maybe have said,

hey, let's maybe swing more Italian-American than fresh off the boat. Um, yes. Maybe have like 5% the inflections. You should have hit it harder. Yes, you should have gone 150% harder. No, you know what I'm saying? That like, this maybe works if you have like 10% of the residual accent. Yeah. Not full Mario Brothers

I can't imagine that because this is so burned In my brain Also I guess the movie is so heightened And it's not like anyone else is being normal In it So I guess that's the But it does kind of feel like Larry is Maybe Larry is just like yes we love it

Like more, more. Yeah. This is crazy. We're really good at casting. That's a spicy meatball, Kevin. Um,

all right. So yeah. So he's a horny man. He's fucking every young woman in town. And it's just so confident that he will never be caught. It's because his poor wife is housebound because she's constantly like cooking dinner. This seems to be her only job.

Yeah. I got two kids. Right. Plowright does all the maintenance in the building. He works. Like, I think she says he works seven days a week, 14 hours a day.

And then yet somehow still finds time to go out and cruise. Well, part of him working that hard is him making quote unquote house calls. You have to remember. Or of course deliveries. yeah yeah um but he uh yeah he i don't really know how else to to sort of what else to say about this initial sort of beginning part of the movie it's just he has uh been sleeping around for it seems like, a long time. I mean, I guess we should say, like, he also is very demanding of her when they're at home.

He's always kind of, like, you know, just expecting to be waited on hand and foot. Yeah, he's a real jerk. He's kind of a jerk. And I feel like she has this confidant in her mother as well as Devo. He's coming over and hanging out. Devo is very nice.

He is very nice. Her mom is kind of crazy. Yes. She's obsessed with tabloids. Yes. Right. She's always telling stories. What's the stabbing story?

27 times. I love this being a movie where you like, you have, like, infamous quotes that, like, ring around in your head. Yeah. Monopoly! More of those, please. Please leave me anymore. Any line readings do you want to give us?

There's that kind of nice moment where his son hurts his finger when they're eating pizza at the restaurant. He puts his son's finger in the glass and he's like, oh, better or whatever. But then he pours I could have a salt or sugar on it

as well and he puts it in his mouth. Right, he does like a little thing. And it's like it's clear that moment is just there because Kazdin or whoever is like we need to understand that there's some admiration. Yeah, and it's like and like you can it's clear that moment is just there because caston or whoever is like we need to understand that there's some admiration yeah and he has like he plays like patty cake with his daughter at one point before going out like you see that he is a good dad yeah he's got some redeeming qualities he's a hard worker uh he's you know obsessed with the uh uh

the american dream yes now i will say for how much this movie becomes about murder and in opposition to a lot of the other films we were talking about in this sort of sub-genre that turn people off because they're like this thing has such a sour tone uh kasdan directs this with the energy as if it were just any silly comedy like it was a comedy about like uh missing papers uh right yeah yeah yes yeah well missing papers does sound pretty good yeah i mean what happened to you ain't gonna find those papers where'd they go um i don't i don't think this is a well-directed movie. I'm sorry, Lawrence. This is what I'm saying. As much as I think he's directed movies well. Yes.

And I think... And he's directed films with like kind of sour tones before. But his comedies are very gentle. Yeah. So, okay. The real question is, does he make a good movie? I'm going to say this is a good movie. Okay. I think it's... I think that's a... Does he make a good movie? I'm going to say this is a good movie.

Okay. I think it's... I think that's a... Please respond. I think this film is entertaining. Look at me. I think this movie is sort of silly and star-laden enough to kind of be like, all right, yeah, all right.

It's absolutely an all right get in here. Yeah, exactly. It's like the club's pretty full and like klein shows up with his brown face and his dead pizza boxes and i'm like this is the kind of movie where someone goes do you want some spaghetti and you go yeah i'll have some yeah sure why not another bowl yeah this is another this is the second bowl of pasta second bowl of pasta movie um post this it's it's grand canyon which is his sort of trying to do big chill for the 90s his flop not maybe not flop but right disappointing but also it's like big children i'm tackling race in america all these people during the la

crossover yeah have never seen seems cursed to me interesting it's definitely a little cursed it's interesting he makes makes Wyatt Earp, which is this, like, long Tony biopic, and then, like, there's just, like, the fucking Pizza Hut version of it over with Tombstone.

That eats his lunch. Just trashes it. Right. Just drowns it in the garbage. Exactly. He makes French Kiss. Which I know people

who love. I've never seen. I know people who fucking. You should fucking watch French Kiss. That's probably a movie you will adore. He does Mumford, which I've never seen. I know people who fucking. You should fucking watch French Kiss. That's probably a movie you will adore. He does Mumford, which I've never seen. Mumford is bananas. You have told me very weird.

I mean, kind of intrigued to watch that one too. Yeah, like unspeakably weird. When Ben pitched this and we were like, that has to be the answer, I said, David, the only reason to question it. Right, like, would we ever do Kasdan? Right. And then you said, maybe let's put Kasdan on the bracket because what's

funnier than if he wins, which is not going to happen, having to do a second episode on I Love You to Death. Committing ourselves as if it's like Alien 3 of like it might need to be done a second time. We're announcing this in advance. I would be for it because then of course

I'm a big defender of Dreamcatcher. I think that movie's basically good. A movie you went on the king cast to talk about right and then after that darling companion I mean is back with Klein again but nobody defends that no an absolute piece of dog shit the movie I've said before made me give up on my one week dream of being a film critic you're a film critic for a second and I was assigned that movie and I was like I can't I can't so this is kind of the beginning of him losing his edge yeah because even if you defend some of the movies i just spoke up for none of them were really hits no he remains a major director in terms of optics throughout the 90s but the movies aren't released

yes but he's never getting awards no he like you know he wrote the bodyguard yeah with you know no i think he's the solo writer again so that's obviously a gigantic paycheck, you know, he wrote The Bodyguard with, you know... No, I think he's the solo writer. So that's obviously a gigantic paycheck. You know, obviously he wrote Star Wars Episode VII. When J.J. Abrams comes on to Star Wars, his first demand is, you have to bring Kasdan back. I'll do it if I can write with Kasdan.

And Kasdan had already been hired to do the solo movie at that point. So he takes a break from Solo to write Force Awakens. And then by all accounts, I don't think I'm talking out of school here. He is the primary reason Lord and Miller get fired from Solo. Because he was like, they're not shooting my script. They're doing all this improv. We have to like reset it and they have to stick to the script.

Which you have seen how that movie turned out good i mean it's cold that's one thing we can agree on the biggest chill possible exactly so it's like was larry kaz never banished from hollywood no no i basically banished from directing at a certain point you know a dream catcher in particular is the moment where they're like you have to sit in the bench for a while you're not not in movie jail, but you're on the bench. He went to movie probation at the very least. He spent a night in the movie drunk tank. More than a night.

But yeah, he's not gone. And obviously his kids work in the business. He has multiple successful kids, John and Jake. And after Dreamcatcher, by the way, there's this period. John plays one of the kids in this movie, right? Yes. And John writes solo with him later. Right.

And Jake is the one who did the Jumanji sequels. And Freaks and Geeks. Yeah. Yeah, a lot of stuff. There is a period post-Dreamcatcher where he's kind of, like, kicked out of the directing club. Where he starts taking, like, high-profile blockbuster screenwriting jobs again and there's sort of this thing i remember like enoch cool reviewing scripts that he got hired to do and being like studios you're sitting on a larry cast and script why aren't you making this that

he was like writing things that if not as good as raiders and uh empire strikes back were better than the films of their ilk that were getting made at the time. Like, he for a long time was developing, not to direct, but just as a writer, the Clash of the Titans movie that ends up being the Leterrier movie 10 years later. And I think he gets credit on that, but his script is not in any way resemble

what made it to the screen. And they'd just be like, you got the guy who's the best version of doing this. And even though it's been some time, he's still putting in pretty good work in this arena when it's for hire. Anyway, he made a movie called I Love You to Death that's about the world's horniest pizza man. Yes. And so could we, before we get back to the plot, I feel like we should do Tracy some justice. Okay. So Tracy's in this movie

tracy allman this is her first feature is right that's that's a great question i think it is she's got such a strange filmography she's got a strange career it's kind of an it's kind of incredible this is her first film yeah because we've talked about obviously she's no no it's not oh oh she's done a few things i was looking at the wrong thing she's in jumping jack flash okay uh the whoopee goldberg movie but not in a big role i don't think so maybe this is her first like she's in that movie plenty the adaptation of the play with meryl streep kind of a forgotten movie and she has like a small role in Give My Regards to Broad Street, the Paul McCartney starring film.

Yes. I feel like this is her first movie post the Tracy Ullman show, the original Tracy Ullman show, which was on Fox in the 80s. Which is what Simpsons comes out of. Correct. Have you heard of The Simpsons?

I have. Okay, so that was a sketch on the trace of nobody knows this nobody knows homer had a different voice you know all very interesting but you know like you looked more lumpy everyone looked pretty lumpy in that one julie cavner and dan castellanata were part of the ensemble cast of the tracy allman show right yeah and there was sort of this like do any of you want to do voices for the simpsons thing and a couple of them were like no and those two were like yeah and tracy by all accounts hated the simpsons yeah like did not like them there was one other cartoon segment that alternated with the simpsons for the first season that was the one she liked that did not connect and when

the simpsons was popping she was like this fucking simpsons. But how did The Simpsons end up? Was it like, how did that get involved in her show? Do you want the quickest version of this? Greening had Life is Hell. Yeah. He was like a bit of a name, I guess. Tracy, like,

basically Tracy, like, explodes slowly over the course of the 80s in England, right? Yeah. From like pop star to like sketch comedian actor. Some of her songs fucking are great. I had never known about her music stuff. I recommend listeners check it out. She was sort of doing, like, in the 80s,

sort of retro-style girl group, 50s, 60s type stuff. Yeah. And then, yeah, then she's, like, part of a couple sketch shows, and then she's finally getting her own stuff and her own specials. And that's when she sort of catches the attention of Hollywood,

and they're like, we gotta bring this person over and she they develop a sitcom for her that like isn't working her producers or rather her husbands are producing partner and she's like i'm caught in this bad like nbc sitcom where i'm like the wacky girl next door and they reach out to james l brooks who's obviously like the best producer if you you know you know, in her position to go after. And he's like, it makes no sense to put you on a sitcom. It should be a variety show because you can sing, you can play 20 characters, this and that. I'm going to put people around you who are good. I'm going to this and that. And then was like, there should be cartoons. And he loved Life is Hell, which is the Matt Groening strip, Groening strip, and asked Matt Groening to do Life as Hell as a cartoon,

and he was like, I don't want to give up the rights to my strip. Right, I don't want to sell those. So he supposedly drew The Simpsons in five minutes while, like,

waiting for the meeting. Which are, like, a caricature of his family. And basically, they, like, Brooks just liked him enough that he was like, sure, we can make this fun. I mean, like,

but the pitch was just five families. And also, Fox, like, basically would have put anything on television. Yeah like basically would have put anything on i would have put just a man poop they were so happy to have brooks on the show and brooks was gonna put on whatever he liked and then he pitches them on but like the simpsons shorts are not riotously funny i know venture but you also they have a weird energy to them that's

kind of cool yes yeah it's kind of cool that they turned into what they turned in i agree with you but also you read about when the show was airing and people were like these shorts are fucking good right like there was an excitement around them the rest of the show was not maintaining right there was a reason it spun off yeah the show was like winning emmys but not getting huge ratings yeah and hollywood was just like she it was very much like this woman is unbelievably talented multifaceted we have to keep on like trying her in different things and she turned down a lot of shit and was like very much kind of like strategically in control of her career and with her husband as well like sort of

helping her um but yeah when she was making movies like especially at this point it's like big swings i mean we've talked about she has her small part and I'll do anything. She was cut out entirely of Death Becomes Her, which she was sort of supposed to be the fourth lead in. She's deleted from that movie entirely. Obviously, she's hysterically funny in Robin Hood Men in Tights as Latrine. She's incredible. Of course, the family changed their name.

It used to be Shithouse. One of my favorite jokes in that movie. It's a good movie. She's in that movie, Household Saints. Peter Newman production. Which I've never seen. It's a good movie. Bullets Over Broadway.

She did a couple of Woody Allen movies. Small Time Crooks is the one she's really good in. She's really funny in that. Yeah. Predator Porter. I've never seen. No. It's weird that neither of us have seen that you know i yeah i should see it yeah uh yeah she was just like it's kind of like she just stopped i feel like after the mid 90s she's like no yeah and it's just like after that's like small

time crooks four years after that she does a dirty shame with john water it's more like it's like if i want to work with someone interesting okay into the woods but apart from that it's like what i do like this is the other thing by like the early 90s after fox cancels her show hbo is just like we'll let you do whatever the true blank check they were like do a special do like 10 episodes every two years like she's one of the first real beneficiaries of HBO just saying like, we'll pay you more to do less and do it with more control. And she's just like, great, I'm just in the HBO business.

Every couple of years, I do a special or another season or this or that. And then like after like 10 years of that, she jumped over to Showtime, did the same thing at Showtime for a couple of years and then jumped back to HBO. But what a unique like like as a sketch comedian what a unique arrangement to have yeah like that's really rare yeah for just a single person she just had like complete autonomy yes tracy takes on yeah she's got seven emmys to watch it now take like tracy takes on there are a lot of

characters people would not be excited to see her play today absolutely it's a way to put it absolutely yeah but i just like the the the filmmaking of it i guess i'll say yeah it's like it's weird with to watch it now and be like this is fucking front-facing character videos yes like very much it's so weird that like but and i'm not trying to even be like no no it was the first one no no she's incredibly pioneering beyond that it's just like that was just not done back then yeah she's like i'm gonna do sketch comedy but it's gonna be single camera no audience right these like filmed sketches like that's not how those things worked back then you know it had in living color or like snl or whatever

right like her bigger thing too with the hbo stuff was like i have 100 characters in my repertoire i'm gonna like shrink this down to 20 and have characters reoccur yeah not in like a recurring sketch way but in a like ongoing. Like, this is sketch comedy, but I want to kind of have through lines of what these characters are going through. It's just interesting. And it's just, like, it's something that sketch comedy always kind of feels like

it fluctuates where it's, like, there's something new and inventive and then it sort of falls out of favor. But it was just, like, it's really interesting to see this kind of, like, straight, just character based comedy. Yes. Now, her movie career was weird because I think people couldn't figure out, like, can you have Tracy Ullman doing a character next in a movie next to people who are playing it, quote unquote, real?

Right. right because her characters were like well observed detailed nuanced enough that even if she's like underneath a bunch of rubber doing a big voice like when you're watching her sketch comedy you're like she plays it very real for sketch comedy yeah but then sometimes you put her in a movie next to people and you'd be like one of these is a cartoon character now suddenly she does not have that problem in this movie in this movie she comes off pretty restrained yeah here's the thing about her in this movie she's movie she comes off pretty restrained yeah here's the thing about her in this movie she's not funny but she's kind of barely it's a good performance but it's like right she's mostly it's a kind of emotional it's mostly a dramatic shattered

performance like everyone else in this movie is so goofy john plowright is next to her right like throwing bowling balls at the screen and And like, obviously, the movie is literally centered around her discovering her husband's like comical level of infidelity. And being so broken up about it that she's like, I gotta kill him. But then everyone else around her are the ones who are like, let's do it.

And she's like kind of burst out about it. I feel like the thing that unfortunately rings true, right, as this there's this one line that sort of justifies the murder plot and because again it is like it feels almost extreme or jarring a little bit where you're like wow you guys

have really jumped to extreme versus maybe I don't know call him out on his infidelities right. Don't they say why don't you get divorced? And she says, like, he'll never get divorced. He's Catholic. There's like one line about like...

I think it's like she, I won't let him be with another woman. Right. But the mom says something to the effect of like, you know, you know, Americans are always just killing each other. It's normal. It's normal in this country to do that. Yeah. And I just felt like, yeah.

That's a wild moment because they do that. Yeah. And I just felt like, yeah. That's a wild moment because they have that conversation in a, like, trailer, right? Where she finally commits to, like, tracing him and being like, let's do it, let's kill him. And then the camera pulls out and, like, there's this insane, like, wide shot,

like, slowly revealing of the trailer underneath a bridge with the whole New York City skyline. Well, that's because... Not New York City, the city skyline. with the whole new york city skyline because not new york city the city skyline they have that conversation in bed and then the shot you're thinking of is uh the grandma goes and talks to some oh yes i'm sorry the first uh hit man she hires right yes it's some like i don't know some friend of hers' grandson who decides to do a favor. He's the one with the mask. Yeah, who wears the Abraham Lincoln mask

and tries to hit him with a bat. Yeah, he tries to murder him via bat. Yeah, which is, you know, cheaper than a gun, which is what they say. But harder. But a lot harder. Bat harder than gun? To murder someone with?

Oh, harder to murder someone. I was going to say, they're both similar. If you hit someone with them. Both pretty hard. You're not talking density of objects. You're talking degree of difficulty. Yes. Well, beyond that, like, killing someone with a gun, I mean, sorry, with a bat, yeah, you gotta hit them over and over again.

Yes, it's kind of gross. Up close. Yeah, it would be hard to do it far away. Well, you throw it, then you have to run after where it landed. Well, run after where it lands a bunch have like a bouquet of bats yeah or you can kind of doll zm it you know like have stretchy arms and kind of go bonk it's actually it's embarrassing he didn't think to doll zm his bats into arms anything would go in this movie if it tried it out Man, imagine if Larry Cass did it on Street Fighter

I like those guys They're crazy They're wild I'm thinking Kevin Kline for Oh, there's no Italian character Can Blanca be Italian? Can Blanca make the pizza? Blanca might be good

Blanca would be good Imagine Street Fighter Imagine Street Fighter cast only with the Cast in all stars You have Hurt as Guile Yeah Hurt as Guile We're gonna run into a problem by the way Just like so quickly with this

So let's have our fun And get out I think I would put Costner as Guile So, let's have our fun and get out. I think I would put Costner as Guile. I think... I think Costner is a real Guile. Then tell me who Hurt is, because we've got to cast him well. Well, I'm running out of Americans, so I'll tell you that much on the Street Fighter cast. Is Hurt playing Bison?

Actually, you know what? You know what? That wouldn't be so bad. Now, of course, Bison is supposedly Ty or whatever, but let's just set that aside. You sub in one Spider-Woman guy for the other. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hurt has the gravitas there.

Sure, sure, sure. Good, good. Gene Davis is Cammy. Eject! Eject! Okay, so moving right along in the plot, we'll just sort of say that the next sort of scenario in which they try to kill joey is grant the the mom she tries to she's very handy yes she can she can fix everything in the building she shows at one point her grandson how to solder yes uh she

tries to explode the car I don't exactly know how She has a whole She's like I put the fuse in the car I expected you know And it almost seems like It's actually going to be not just Joey But Tracy too She's in the car

I'm going to drive with him today No no no you don't want to I can't remember why It's a long scene There's a lot of scenes of klein not getting it including this one right right yeah yeah well he's he's a self-obsessed guy and he's not the smartest let's say also this guy never gets it but he can get it he can and does and gets it several times a day yeah clearly but yeah so he witnesses this turns on the car, nothing happens. Right.

Okay. Yep. Okay, so now they're running out of ideas. What's the next thing to do? Well, it's to feed him three bottles of sleeping pills. Yep. Three full bottles. Thinking, okay, this will poison him.

Right. This must... They make a big sauce. A big sauce. It's a big sauce a big it's a big which i think is their first mistake very spicy too much sauce yeah they really needed to go down on the sauce oh you're saying that the pills are diluted too much yeah i think so but they make they make this giant pot of sleepy spaghetti to try to sleep from the death you're not wrong This movie I will say Is a lot of fun to talk about

At this point The movie is like you said The first hour we're kind of Not even an hour but 45 minutes We're kind of moving around At this point it's like we're in the house And he's gotta go and he won't Nothing will kill this guy

Once they're making the sleepy sauce It's like, okay, he eats tons of it. He loves it. He's like, best sauce you've ever made. And then he's like,

my stomach hurts and I'm tired. Right. But he doesn't die. Right. He passes out in the plate of spaghetti, which also causes this complication later every time they shoot him and they can't figure out if he's been hit.

Or if it's sauce. whether it's blood or sauce. So then I guess they bring in... It's just really funny that he just won't fall asleep there. Yeah. Like that he is just somehow... He's like, I'm okay. He has a steel stomach. He's just like nothing will faze him. Right.

And at this point, when does River Phoenix enter? Once he passes out... Right yeah river phoenix yeah yeah they call devo to come over um and finish up the job he uh uh john plowright calls him and says like you really love my daughter right you'll do anything for her yeah he's like of course and they're like come over here right now yeah yes comes over they hand him a gun finish the job they have the gun yes they have the gun anyone at this point joan plowright should probably just shoot him in the head but she doesn't want to i feel like she's probably like got a good shot yeah she's the oldest yeah yeah

the wisest so wise yeah uh and so river phoenix shoots him in the head but i guess i don't know if it's that it's just the small caliber of the gun or if it's just he's a bad shot it basically like grazes his ear he looks away well no it shows at the end the movie that there is a bullet in his head i think that's the second shot am i wrong about no the second shot is in his head. But I think that's the second shot. Am I wrong about that? No, the second shot is in his heart. Oh, you're right. Yeah. You're right. So yes, it does go like... No, I have... Yes, I was so confused by this. Yes. Because he mostly has the ear wound. Right. But then, right, he

keeps saying later, like, I have a bullet in my head. Right. Yeah. And he's bleeding on the pillow underneath him. He is. And I could not tell, right, where is this bullet? Because the one side is all spaghetti sauce. The second side, he has been hit. Yeah. The other side of his head in some way that is bleeding onto the bed.

I think it just went into his head, but it just, whatever. It didn't work. Lodge dick. What's important is he's not dead. He's not dead. So, right, like, so, right, the first shot is botched by River. Yes. He then brings in Keanu and...

Right. He goes to a bar where they hang out. Wearing a Fu Manchu... I mean, we just have to say it. There is no other way to describe it. And it's just not funny. He wears a trench coat. Yeah.

And a Fu Manchu mustache. Trying to have a disguise. No one is tricked at all by it. No. It's a funny image. And it's. No. It's a funny image. And it's a bizarre. It's a funny image. And so, you know, in cinema sometimes, you know, there's memorable moments.

Okay. And so here we are. We're in some skeevy bar. Our finest critic. Cinema sometimes there's memorable moments. We're in a skeevy bar, right? Somewhere in Washington, Tacoma. You go to the back room and there's a pool table. And there's a man. We're in a skeevy bar, right? Somewhere in Washington, Tacoma. You go to the back room and there's a pool table

and there's a man, he's kind of leaning. You can't tell if he's asleep. Is he asleep? What's going on? Is he playing pool? And all of a sudden, William Hurt lifts up, then raises his sunglasses.

His cool sunglasses. His little flip-up sunglasses. An arm appears. Whose arm is this? Well, it's one Keanu Reeves. A very handsome, young, 25-year-old Keanu Reeves. With a fucking nose ring. A nose ring.

He's got like a flock of seagulls, X2 haircut. Well, it's even more than that. It's like a failed buzz cut. There's a slice of like Miss Razoring. I think it's more that he's maybe been to like a failed buzz cut. There's a slice of mis-razoring. I think it's more that he's maybe been to a mental hospital or something. Oh, that's also very possible. Right, his hair has been growing in weird directions. I think he was getting electric shock therapy.

Because he's got a clear patch that was shaved. He definitely seems... Great. Yes, but also in another dimension. They both do, I suppose. Yeah. They're both clearly using heroin. What?

They talk, I mean, they are referred to as druggies. Druggies. In this film. Yeah, I think they are right. They are the 80s, 90s version of a drug user on screen, which is just like, they just seem stoned. They use drugs. We're not going to talk about

right you know it's just like yeah they're druggies yeah they're from the wrong side of the tracks yeah right they're low life they're desperate they're down they're weirdos yeah yeah um but i mean it hurts it's pretty sweet that they found each other it is well i think he refers to him as his cousin but that might might not be, you know, that might be like by blood. It's sweet that they have each other. Absolutely. It's about 15 years older than Keanu, so that's like, they're an odd, you know, gap. They can't be siblings.

They can't be parents on, yeah. Don't you want to see a whole movie about these guys? Yes, of course. Don't you want to watch a whole series? It's not even one of those things where you're like, no, no, no. Yes, of course. I wish there were a whole series of them. You know what I mean? It's not even one of those things where you're like, no, no, no. Small doses.

Right. They're effective because there's not that much of them. No. No. They would be great together for a whole movie.

I could watch as much as they have. If this movie had been inexplicably a giant hit, one, I would be like, what the hell was going on in America? Well, of course,

then Italy and America would be at war. They would actually be at war. Italy actually would have caught wind. But two, then then yeah they get spun off right absolutely get reeves and hurt yeah it's like reeves it's like break doesn't happen like this happens instead yeah he never makes matrix he never makes speed gen x yes and then her is kind of like this burnt out hippie. Yeah. And they're just like degenerates out in America trying to make a buck or something. They're offered $500 between them.

They were originally offered $200. Right. They end up getting paid $200. Right. That's their sort of nominal injury fee. Right. They don't get the full $500. Yeah.

But they're going to get 500 bucks to murder a man Cause River's thing is like 200 And he's like 500 This is murder And he's like the guy's basically got one foot in the door already Right right I already shot him You're just finishing the job

And then they instead pay him only $200 Because they did shoot him But didn't kill him Yes they're too cowardly. Keanu is too cowardly to look. Yeah. Hurt shoots him in the chest but misses his heart. Of course, we get the fun gag, which is they're trying to remember where your heart is.

Because we all know your heart is on one damn side of your body. We're on the left side. Another good gag is Keanu constantly forgetting the name of the guy they're there to shoot. Whenever they bring him up, he's really confused who they're talking about. The energy of this movie, it's so heightened when Klein is awake.

Yes. And then when he's out, it becomes this weird trade-off between their stone thing, which is funny. Yes. And Tracy Ullman is just like crying right and joan plowright is like come on murder him already what are we doing here that's the thing though yeah the closer klein gets to death the movie loses its comedic motor and then it's

just like sort of odd people talking to people just hanging out in a house right deciding to murder someone which you know they're not gonna do you kind of know at this point you're like yeah he's unkillable like yeah there is just no way this guy's just clearly got like too much semen inside him and bullets just bounce off that's the reason why you know what i mean he's just so fucking horny it's filled with semen yeah so the bullet can't get through that's gotta be what it is yeah either that or i guess he's just inhaling pizza dough and it's making like a force field it's both uh Right but you're just kind of like Let me just like sit with these weird characters

And those two are very funny And Omen is compelling And obviously she can be very funny She's very upset when she thinks That he's finally been killed But what were you going to say about her? Just I mean I feel like she has to be upset because again

The end of this movie needs to work. Yeah. Quote unquote. Yeah. Right. Sure. But also you're, I was almost upset watching her.

Cause again, man, Owen Roisman and Andy Coates and James Horner. Yeah. That's the cinematographer, editor and composer. Those are like three of the greatest in their fields ever. The editor of Lawrence of Arabia,

like the most famous cut of all time or in roseman it's like fucking french connection exorcist network toots you know like the biggest movies these are like the top level craftsmen in hollywood at this point in time and james horner he he's kind of starting out but i mean he's he's no slouch no and uh anyway yeah it's just like i'm almost like she she never says like this is the father of my children I mean she says it earlier maybe but like At that point maybe she should be like Can we stop

But they're into deep God is intervening like you know basically telling us not to do it Once they've given him all the sleeping pills She's into deep I think their other thought is like If he wakes up he will see what we tried to do to him. Yeah. And Plowright is just so bullheaded about like,

he must die. Yeah. She keeps on like talking Ullman out of her doubts. For sure. Right. A moment I wanted to shout out to is when Joey wakes up and he's like being introduced to Hurt and Keanu. Yeah.

They're so bad at making up fake names where he literally goes, no, wait, wait. Uh, Smith. A very Ben joke. Yeah. You love searching for a name and struggling to find it.

That is something you like in multiple movies. I am now seeing these connections. I have no idea. Not objecting. It is funny. Can we, I want to say on my, and we'll see how this resolves itself, but the building our office is in,

there's like an inner building network where people can like post updates about like, oh, maintenance is happening here or whatever. But also people post if they're like, have a credenza to get rid of only asking for a hundred dollars and we got an email this morning saying uh i have a bunch of battery operated light up wall mountable letters that spell out mason they've been in my son's bedroom he's outgrown them i will give them away for free if anyone wants that god is speaking to us so i emailed back and said yes we would like those letters They've been in my son's bedroom. He's outgrown them. I will give them away for free if anyone wants them.

God is speaking to us. So I emailed back and said, yes, we would like those letters. And the thought is that we will put them on our wall and then write, I want to say above it. And it's going to always be funny. It's always going to be funny. I want to say Mason. I want to say Mason. Gurdon would fit right into this movie.

Put him somewhere. Yeah. One of the cops. I don't know. Yeah. He'd be good. He'd be funny. I want to say Mason. I want to say Mason. Gurdon would fit right into this movie. Put him somewhere. Yeah. One of the cops. I don't know. Yeah. He'd be good. He'd be great. Maybe he could be Hurt.

You ever do that? Did he ever do something like that? No. That'd be fun. No. I don't. Him as like a weird stoner. Yeah.

I don't know. I don't think he's got the energy for it. I didn't think William Hurt had the energy. And then I fucking rented I Love You to Death on iTunes. You just rented it? You didn't buy it? No, I bought it. I bought it.

13 bucks. Really? Yeah, why not? I never, yes, I never would have guessed that Hurt had this performance in him. And there are, like, later career, like, he's obviously very funny in History of Violence. Well, yes, he is. But that's, like... But that's, that's, that's the context of what he's doing.

15 years later, and he's also more menacing. He's so good in that movie. Joey, what the fuck? How do you fuck that up? He's so good in that movie. I mean, obviously, William Hurt is notoriously one of the most annoying people in the universe. I don't know.

He's like a huge asshole. A nightmare person. Right, and his misbehavior has been, he's no longer with us as well, obviously. But his misbehavior has been documented or talked about by co-stars. And Kazan clearly was just, he either could tolerate him or knew how to deal with him

or they had a longstanding relationship so he could get interesting things out of him. That really could work out. I mean, this is the beginning of Hurt, like, kind of blowing it, right? Like, again, it's kind of like Kaz, and you look at Hurt's 80s, and you're like, these are all huge movies. And his 90s suck.

They're a disaster. Right, and when he does History of Violence, people are like, that's wild for him to, like, show up in this small of a role. And it's like, no, I mean, he was... In this great of a character actor role. He was available. Yeah, and not only that,

he gets the surprise Oscar nomination and, like, does not build on it in any meaningful way no i mean he kept making movies making movies but he did not have like a true late period resurgence in the way that role maybe felt like it could be a reinvention because he's he shows up for like he's on five minutes of history of violence ben have you seen history of Violence? I don't think I have. I think you'd like that movie. You would love that movie. It's a Cronenberg. It's a real thermostat performance from Hertz. He is crazy.

We shouldn't talk about it if you haven't seen it, but he has a crazy performance. Well, I was going to say about Hertz 90s is he kind of got blarped. He does get blarped. He goes through the planet core. A few people have gotten blarped harder. Yeah, he's maybe the most blarped

although really everyone in lost in space i love your wife i mean like okay so like lost if lost in space is like a black hole yeah like oldman escapes like oldman grazes by it and he's fine yeah heather graham she kind of escapes i mean she gets a few more things after it. Everyone else got sucked in. Yes. Like Hurt, Mimi Rogers, Chabert, Matt LeBlanc.

They're all in there. Yeah. Blarp. Blarp. Blarp, I mean. Blarp has not, has Blarp been in a film since Lost in Space?

No, but I mean, there's a lot, I mean, if you Google Blarp. Blarp. Blarp's one of those open secret guys in Hollywood. He did a Fireplace video.

That's all I'll say. I did. I hear he has a new podcast on the gas network. I don't even know what that is. I don't want to know. Okay, so anyway. He wakes up. He's been shot multiple times. He's been poisoned.

He's fully made up like a zombie now. They've given him blue skin and rings around his eyes and multiple bloody wounds. He's been shot. He's been shot. He's bleeding. Right. And he's like,

my head hurts, my stomach hurts, I don't know, I feel a little weird. You need to feed these men. Yes, right. You need to give him some snacks. He's just rude. Yeah.

Right. Yeah. And, well, how does he eventually reveal? Because there's the other, they go to the bar. There's the other criminal

who's getting arrested. Yeah, they go back to the bar. Who's other criminal who's getting arrested yeah they go that's a character actor and he like spills on uh a fucking hurt and reeves to get a lighter something and so right then they get tracy gets arrested right yeah the cops show up right no something's they've been told it's been taken out and then like it's arrested klein comes out sleepwalking they're more confused like right and um there's a great scene where we're like so no no other actors going really a large or big or allowed in this movie right no klein's in his hospital big mir Miriam Margulies shows up. Again, no Italians are allowed. But Miriam Margulies can show up as his mom.

Yes. Whose one parenting method is slapping him across the face. Beating the shit out of him. Yes. And she correctly is like, what's the matter with you? You know, you disrespected your wife.

I don't think she says it like that. I think she does. Very even-handed. Oh, what's the matter with you? But it's funny. I think she does. Very even-handed. Oh, what's the matter with you? But it's funny. She's very funny. She does not say what is the matter. Just to clarify.

Even though he has just almost been- What is the matter? He's almost been murdered, and she's so mad at him. Because Victoria Jackson comes to visit him in the hospital. Yeah. Yeah. She does. Yeah.

Victoria Jackson. What do we think of her i mean look i used to be really i i always thought she was very funny on snl i would always be happy when she showed up and she's funny on snl i guess yeah yeah she's got her thing she's got the high voice thing i was i'm weird into that thing as a 90s snl kid yeah what's she up to these days? She's kind of an early crank. She's still doing it all. Trump copied her. She was there being crazy for years.

She's going on the fucking America First Network and saying dogs should be illegal. Whatever her position is now. They're trying to make pajamas gay they are? I think so I don't know there ought to be a law

and that's why I'm still blacklisted from Hollywood that's the other thing that's why I can't get work it's been 20 years who are we kidding here oh boy but she's funny in this i mean she's playing i feel like she was often cast as the bimbo right i'm not a bimbo stood in opposition to right uh you have the funny little montage of them all

going through bookings and taking their mug shots that's just like good little character comedy of these like eight different like jamokes we've met over the course of this movie all having different responses to being on the line now i don't think the real person went to jail she went to jail she did and she served a few years in jail and got out years and they stayed together then they stayed together but in this movie kevin klein's like i don't want to press charges and i was saying to fork it i was like at that point i don't think you can kind of be just like can we forget the whole like they've already like the i'm actually not mad at her charges right like you can't go around hiring for higher killers and

i forgive them like the the snowballs rolling down the hill right yeah i think as someone who knows a little bit about the law i'm pretty sure that yeah he can just kind of be like let's forget it yeah you're like are you sure she's my wife but he's that was that's his argument i invoke let bygones be bygones the judge is is like, duly invoked. Remand this woman to, you know, say one, two, three, pizza town. Two, three, pizza town. And so at the end, everyone's reunited.

William Hurt and Keanu are, you know, very surprised that Joey has let them go. Mm-hmm. You know... Keanu, I believe, says, who's Joey? Yeah. And then walks into a door.

Yeah. It's fucking funny. I'll say, like, this is where Keanu's performance is really good. Yeah. He sells walking into that door. It is, like, a door that is closed. He is facing forward.

The camera's following him from behind. In setup, you're like, no one could be that stupid to walk into this door. And you see it happening from a mile away. And he doesn't. You're like, I buy it. It's believable. The character he's built would do that. It's true.

He plays such like people who are in another universe. And you're like, yeah, that's what that person's like. Giano should be funny again. I i mean i guess he did do he did the bill and ted sequel which was good and he's good in it yeah um so he's definitely got it in him and he was really good in fucking always maybe on maybe he's really good in that playing a version of himself but really funny in it um he's obviously have you seen that movie ben Ben? No. Ali Wong, Randall Park, rom-com, and they were like

best friends, and he realizes like, I think I've actually always been in love with her. And she's like, I am actually dating someone right now. And it's Keanu Reeves.

And it's Keanu Reeves as Keanu Reeves. Oh, fuck. And he's got like 10 minutes of him basically doing his version of the like, Neil Patrick Harris,

Harold and Kumar, the worst version of Keanu as arrogant movie star. Oh, word. But he's great in it. Okay he's great okay i should it's at the very least worth watching those 10 minutes okay yeah he's got that great clip from the matrix resurrections press tour yeah where someone's like trying to explain nfts to him yes being like no no no man like it's gonna take off and he's just can't help but like laugh in their face yes i watch it a lot it's really good he i mean look he's done some good comedy work in animation like duke kaboom he's so fucking funny as someone who's now seen that performance many many times

incredibly he's really funny as duke um he's very funny in dc super pets as batman oh sure not a very large role he is live action but the only good part of the third spongebob movie which otherwise is dog shit uh sure but yeah i haven't seen that more live action comedy please i feel like oh he was supposed to be in the fucking second aziz ansari movie to be permanently shut down He was the star of a comedy that Aziz was directing with Keanu and Rogan. Oh, interesting. And it is now the second Aziz Ansari directorial project that will never be finished.

Yeah, because, like, the stuff he has... Oh, he's going to make a movie with Jonah Hill? Is he? I don't know. That doesn't seem like it's in production. Okay. So, really, it's just right now,'s like the john wick spinoff he's gonna pop in on that one ballerina and he's making a constantine sequel that's all he's got going right now this is the one constantine yeah i mean believe me i'm pro that oh pro as hell yeah yeah but uh but cool

what won't exactly be uh a light on deft on its feet like comedy no although i mean be funny if that's what they went for yeah walks into doors as constantine um ben final thoughts final thoughts well i'll say oh they get back together they get back together they fuck in the jenner's closet yeah that's another good it's like she's harnessing his horniness finally that's another good moment when she's sort's harnessing his horniness finally that's another good moment when she's sort of checking to see if he died or not

with the shot and he starts talking to her and then he like tries to fuck her yeah he just like points and he's like zonked out

he like can't open his eyes but he's still like I'm down this guy's unredeemably horny yeah he is so horny irredeemably horny

so so horny final thoughts um 10 out of 10 normal movie Horny. Yeah. He is so irredeemably horny. So, so horny. Final thoughts. Um, 10 out of 10 normal movie, 10 out of 10 normal movie. Um, no,

I just, I have, um, sorry to be, you know, someone who's, uh, you know, uh,

into nostalgia, but, uh, this is a real comfort movie for me. And it still holds up. And I had a lot of fun talking

about it. David's doing the pose from the poster. And and I'm gonna go get some pizza. Oh. Where are you going to go? That place around the corner. Maybe bleep it out.

Maybe bleep it out, David. You said it wrong, so it doesn't matter. I didn't say it wrong. I think I said it right, but bleep it. Okay, maybe you said it right. Yeah. You should start saying wrong things. You're going to our local pizza place, Papa John's.

I'm going to Joey's place. I'm going to Ray's place. I'm going to Ray's Pizza. Right? Yep. That fucking, that'll scatter them. Yeah.

Okay, one, two, three, two. There's not any Ray's anymore. Fewer. Fewer and fewer these days. The real life couple, there's a picture in this article

I sent to you that I'll have Marie post. They have in their home a bunch of clippings and movie posters and merchandise from this movie yeah good for them that's funny that they love it own it right yeah why not you just rarely hear of that usually you hear of like how dare they make this movie about us we object this is a terrible stereotype they're doing.

Imagine, like, becoming new, like, couple friends with them. Getting invited over for dinner. And they're like, I really like this movie. And they go,

it's about us! I shot him! I shot him two times! I couldn't tell they make a movie about us! Yeah, when you read the quotes Of the husband in this article

I can't help but just hear Clines like reading Do I forgive him? Yes nothing happened to me It's okay Apparently he owns a small piece of the movie So they get some money They gave him a slice

Ben five comedy points I don't know if he's getting tons of residuals, but some, right? He had a slice. Anyway, this was fun. Well, we got to play the box office game. We got to play the box office game. Do you guys have any final thoughts?

I give it five of these. David is doing the thumb to middle finger. I made a really good sauce the night I watched this movie. Coincidence? You posted pictures. Wait, what kind of sauce? Isn't a la repiana, you know?

What's that? Spicy tomato sauce. It's like tomato, garlic, oregano, sleeping pills. One bottle or two bottles. To your taste. To taste. i think griffin you've hit on something though with sleepy pasta sleepy pasta i really think that like what's the popular sleeping pill uh uh you're talking uh not ambien amb Yeah. Ambien should start a whole new line of food products. Pizza flavored Ambien.

This is my thing basically. I'm like, we all know from creepy pasta, right? Which spooks you out. Yeah. Keeps you up at night. Yep. Can we combine like pasta with ASMR? Can we make pasta that puts you at ease?

Oh my God. Sleepy pasta. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I have my sleep podcast that I've been working on. Sleepy podcast. I start also offering sauce. Yep. Sleepy sauce.

Mm-hmm, sleepy sauce. And you know, there's nothing better than when you're trying to go to sleep than a warm bowl of pasta. Some ragout. Yeah. Ragout. Okay, box office game

April 6th 1990 This movie opens to 74 million domestic It's opening at number 6 To 4 million dollars So it's not making our top 5 It's got 4 mil It's gonna lag that out to 15 A robust 15

And then probably do some decent blockbuster business one hopes, right? It made at least an additional $25 being licensed to Comedy Central. Yes. Yeah. The movie that's at number one is a film I imagine, well, I know this

in fact, resonated greatly with Mr. Ben Hosley. Has it been a previous Ben's choice? Or do we just know that it resonated? I'm sure we will cover it on this podcast, probably on the Patreon. Certainly on the Patreon. One day. It's the launch of a long-running, ongoing franchise that's had many stops and starts.

Based on a comic book. 1990. Stops and starts. Comic book yeah 1990 stops and starts comic book ben loves it ben do you have any idea what this is 1990 based on a comic book this is a post batman yeah but was it was is he kind of like like kind of twisted it's a team oh it's a team it's a team it's a 90s comic book team movie was it a recent book at the time of this film is this adapting like new material yes okay it's a team you love it teenage mutant ninja turtles there you go which is a damn franchise we will do one of these days but that movie kind of rocks oh that movie

uh it's got incredible sort of like set design i don't think this is even a radical take that's like kind of the first movie to get right the like make the movie of the comic book yeah don't run it through the hollywood development wheel and try to like rethink it like make the movie that everyone wants to see put all the characters in it make them look the way they looked in the drawings right um for ben's birthday i bought him a blu-ray of ninja turtles with a scratch and sniff card uh cool stinko vision stinko vision love that you've seen the new one right you gotta check it out yeah unfortunately i've had some life stuff going i know but and i was unable to catch it while

it's probably on you can you can scale the mountain it's on top of peter plus that's right so if you want to climb the mountain. I just need to log in. I'm sorry. Wait. You're not one of the... 50 to 100 subscribers? I love Paramount+. To be clear.

Mostly because I have Star Trek. The worst UI. Yeah. I use it through Apple, actually, because I hate the UI so much. Number two at the box office. It's a smash hit comedy. Probably such a gigantic success that it's hurting any comedy opening against it. It's only in its third week.

It's not Wayne's World. Bigger. Bigger. 1990. It's only in its third week. It's gigantic. Gigantic. Is it like... Tell me about the star of this picture.

Two stars. The man is an established romantic leading man. The woman is, uh, this is her breakout role. But she is an Oscar nominee who's done some good. Oh, it's called Pretty Woman? Yeah, it's a film by Gary Marshall about this woman who's pretty. Pretty Woman.

Pretty Woman. Seen it, Ben? Yeah. Humongous hit. Yeah. Yeah. It's a big movie. Yeah.

Pretty charming. Yeah. It's a big movie Yeah Pretty charming Yeah It's got some good stuff in it Yeah Number three at the box office Now we are cooking Okay Insane that

I Love You to Death Opened three places below This film Which is also debuting this week Is also a broad comedy Perhaps broader Perhaps broader? It is the third film Also debuting this week is also a broad comedy, perhaps broader. Perhaps broader?

It is the third film in a long-running comedy series in which its main character does something or goes someplace. Is it in earnest? Earnest. What's he done now? So the third one would be, the first one is Goes to Camp. Yes. I believe this is JD's favorite. The second one is Saves Christmas.

If you tell me so, I don't fucking know. The third one is not Scared Stupid. JD's favorite one. It's not Slam Dunk was direct-to-video, Ernest Goes to Africa, Ernest Goes to Army. What's the one I'm not thinking of? It's JD's favorite. I believe so. Yeah favorite i believe so yeah

i believe so and you're right that camp and then christmas are one and two goes to jail earnest has gone to jail yes that is the best one that is the best one uh and not only has he gone to jail but he has you know suplexed i love you to death talk about character work i mean that's the one, because he's got the dual role in that one, where he plays the felon who looks like Ernest, who switches place with him in jail, and it's bravura work from Varney.

That's very good. He's really good in it. Have we talked about that as a franchise? It's on the long list for the bracket, Ben. I'll have you know. We never maybe said this on mic because there was this sort of long-promised JD blank check episode

where we let JD cash in his blank check. And what it was supposed to be was on April 1st, we were going to release an episode on Ernest Goes to Jail and act like it was the third episode in our ongoing John Cherry miniseries. Yes.

That was the bit. I can't remember why miniseries. Yes. That was the bit. I can't remember why we didn't do it. A couple different reasons. Okay. Kept on getting kicked. It kept on getting kicked and it was officially canceled. Yeah, it's officially canceled. Yes.

Or is it? But Ernest is on the bracket. Sure, I guess. Ernest goes to March Madness? Number five. Uh-huh. Oh, no, sorry, number four, also new this week, Neo Noir Horror. Neo Noir Horror, 90.

If you've heard of this movie, I will be stunned. I don't know it myself. It's called The Dark Creeping. Honestly, a solid guess. This film stars Lou Diamond Phillips and Michael T. Williamson. It's directed by Robert Resnikov. I can't remember why. Oh, because this movie foiled me on fucking

box office game. It was a movie I never had heard of. And now I've heard of it once and I've already forgotten the title. What's it called? The film was called The First Power. Yes. Yes. I don't really know much else. I just know that I didn't know it. Number five at the box office Is a

Thrilling Action drama Geopolitical Based on a bestseller Based on a bestseller It's not Pelican Brief? No That wasn't a bad guess?

Nope, solid guess Is it a Crichton? Nope okay but not that is it a creighton nope but is it that kind of name yes but it's no nor neither creighton nor clancy nor grisham nor grisham oh sorry it is clancy it is it's clancy i meant to say neither i meant to say grisham fucker is it a jack ryan yes it's pat Patriot Games? No. It's Clear and Present Danger. No. It's neither of those. Oh, it's Hunt for Red October?

The Hunt for Red October. I always think that's early days. But it's not. It's 1990. Starting off the decade with style. A fantastic film. Have you seen the Hunt for Red October? I know the box.

Of course. Well, it's red. Red as of course that I've like walked by a million times at Blockbuster but I I just it didn't entice me look if you have any thoughts

get them out here because you're never going to have another opportunity to talk about that movie well I haven't seen it so I guess and you never will

I guess all I'll say is could have been redder sure I Love You to Death is number six Driving Miss Daisy Best Picture winner from last year Is still honking away at number seven

Yep Good Look that's Hans Zimmer Maybe he's good Those Cynthia Hans Zimmer scores of the 80s Opening at number eight A huge bomb Is John Waters' Cry Baby

Oh yeah Good movie Yeah Number nine is something called opportunity knocks that's a that's a carvey it's a carvey that was a carvey solo vehicle dana carvey yeah it's a donald petrie movie yeah con man yes uh i've never seen it it feels like just feels like a Ben's Choice that never happened It's only not a Ben's Choice By the grace of God

The syndication deal struck out Right It ended up on the wrong channel It should have been a Ben's Choice Right it was on Spike TV for some reason There's also another Dana solo movie called Clean Slate where he's got like Short term memory loss

I've never heard of these fucking yeah I've at least seen with Valerie Galino I've seen this poster yeah I remember my parents always telling me that they thought Opportunity Knocks was good but I never convinced me to rent it

but I'd be like walking up and down the comedy aisle looking for something and they'd go like Opportunity no it's pretty good people don't talk about it's pretty good the film's original teaser trailer had carvey introducing it as the church lady that's how yes like desperate they were that trailer is insane and then there were articles and the reviews at the time were like we want to make this clear the church lady is not in this movie um it's like that phantom of the opera poster poster starring Robert Englund where they have Freddy Krueger. Right. Being like, I endorse this movie, bitch.

See it in your dreams or at the multiplex, bitch. Freddy is always funny. Terrible bitch. Bitch man, though. More like a bitch man. The thing about Opportunity Knocks, which I've not seen, but makes the most sense, is that Carvey's got the perfect

guy to act opposite. You know, really easygoing guy. Really great. Like, same generation. A real match for him. It's Outback Pall for him It's Robert Loja It's just like bizarre I knew it was a grumpy old man Yeah I assume he's conning him or whatever

Number 10 Joe vs. The Volcano That's the box office that week So a lot of comedies that aren't going over Yeah Ernest Goes to Jail is going over best But like I Love You to Death Cry Baby, Opportunity, Knox, Jovers,

these are all like weird comedies that aren't connected. And you understand actually... Pretty Woman is connected. You understand Pretty Woman getting dumped into this period where you're like, Gear's kind of a star in the decline, Julie Roberts hasn't popped yet, that premise, who's gonna go for that? He falls in love with...

record scratch, a sex worker with a heart of gold? Like on paper, that movie maybe seems not that different from the other whole insane thing with that movie where they like completely reworked what it was like you know yeah anyway also this insane thing they do where richard gear closed the jewelry box and she didn't know when her response is real and that should be illegal that wasn't planned they didn't do that in rehearsals okay so we gotta um post our episode uh on the building oh okay yeah um any book of casper the friendly ghost happy to buy or to borrow for the upcoming weekend from Fatma. Someone in our building wants to borrow a Casper.

Or buy, Griff. I honestly feel so embarrassed that I don't own one. I'll have you know though, Marie texted me last night to say, I'm watching Casper, you were right. Right about what? Everything. Truly everything. And that's been our episode.

Please make sure to follow. Yup. I hope you're happy. I am happy. Make sure to tell your friends to follow the show. Write a review. Write a frigging ass review. If you've never written a review, do it.

Because I told you to. It helps the show, okay? Remember to rate, bitch. I want to thank, personally, Marie Barty for our social media. As well as helping me to produce the show. Yeah. Having good taste. Having good taste. Casper. I want to thank Alex Barron

and AJ McKeon for editing and for everything else they do for the show. True. Big, big, big fans of those two guys. Keep being good friends.

Yeah. And handsome men too. Someone came to the fashion show and was like does everyone work on your show is everyone is everyone who works on blank check a fucking hunk and the answer is c damn who's that i'll take my answer off mike okay uh yeah thanks to uh pat uh, Patrick Reynolds and Joe Bowen for our artwork. Uh, thanks to Lane Montgomery and the Great American Novel for our music. I'm going to request that for, uh, the artwork for this, that, uh, Pat put your face on every cast member rather than throwing David or I on any of them.

You should be all seven. I agree. Yeah. Characters on the box. And, you know, make sure, Pat, that when you do it, you do it respectively.

Respectively or respectfully? Both. Both. Both. Both. Both. Both. Both.

Both. Both. Both. Both. Coming up next week, we've got our episode on Hayao Miyazaki's new movie, The Boy and the Heron.

And then the week after that we're gonna do bradley cooper's maestro david has seen it i have seen david loves it you love i do love it yes i'm very excited do you have to like classical music no uh no it's not really no it's not really crucial but you do like nos. That's well established on the history of this show. Should I hire a ensemble to play in the room while we record the episode? Yes. Not even like a French horn? Make a posting on the building's website.

Does anyone know where I could borrow? Are there any orchestras in the building? If anyone has one in the building, it would be silly not to use it. At least ask if there's any in the building. I don't know if I want to start a precedent of like, if it's in the building, we have to use it. It's in the building. I mean, David. David.

Turn off. Off now. Right? We're done, right? Well, yeah. And as always, Monopoly!