Blank Check with Griffin & David - Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade with Chris Gethard

Episode Date: March 23, 2025

What if Indiana Jones had a dad who was a “grail scholar" but also his “eskimo brother" and he was played by James Bond and he had a funny little hat? We are so glad Steven Spielberg dared to imagine this scenario because we got Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade out of it! Chris Gethard - The self-proclaimed “Bad Boy of Blank Check Guests” - joins the crew to talk about this delightful film, considered a fulcrum point in Spielberg’s career where he switches perspectives from son to father. We’re talking about daddy issues. We’re asking if Kazim is the Kit Fisto of this film. We’re wondering if Elsa looking hottest when dressed as a Nazi is a weird psychosexual thing Spielberg is exploring. We’re realizing in real time that Indiana Jones might be a terrible archeologist. Basically - you should hand in your blimp tickets and join us on a very fun ride. Listen to Gethard's Special A Father and the Sun Listen To Beautiful Anonymous Checkout That Show monthly at UCB NY LIVE and LIVE STREAMED Sign up for Check Book, the Blank Check newsletter featuring even more “real nerdy shit” to feed your  pop culture obsession. Dossier excerpts, film biz AND burger reports, and even more exclusive content you won’t want to miss out on. Join our Patreon for franchise commentaries and bonus episodes. Follow us @blankcheckpod on Twitter, Instagram, Threads and Facebook!  Buy some real nerdy merch Connect with other Blankies on our Reddit or Discord For anything else, check out BlankCheckPod.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Blackjack with Griffin and David Blackjack with Griffin and David Don't know what to say or to expect All you need to know is that the name of the show is Blackjack You have podcasted poorly. That's good. Right? I do want to just, I want to highlight two interesting taglines for this movie. One I really like, one I think is really stupid.

Is Adventure Still Has a Name or was that her last? I think that's the second one. So the first one is terrible, in my opinion. So bad, so funny that they did this. And this is the teaser poster that's just Indy holding his whip. The man with the hat is back, and this time he's bringing his dad. It just sounds like a Macaulay Culkin movie.

It just sounds so stupid. I remember the man with the hat is back, and I had flipped in my mind that that was for Temple and that fucking adventure still exists. Chris, the man with the hat is back. Chris, the man with the hat is back, and I had flipped in my mind that that was for Temple and that fucking adventure still exists. Chris, the man with the hat is back. Chris, the man with the hat is back. And this time he's bringing his dad. I'm like, what do I care if he,

that's exciting, his dad? It's not inherently good news. First half, man with the hat is back. That's fine, it's a little- Iconic hat. Maybe the iconic hat. He's more than a hat. He's bringing his dad.

Yeah, but he has a man with a hat. He was recently on Connections, NYT Connections, things Indiana Jones is associated with. Oh, I know that one. And it was like hat, whip, bomber jacket. There was a fourth thing. Anyway, the other tagline I really like. I wanna say about that poster.

Yeah. Beautiful Drew Struz painting. Really nice painting, although I also think I prefer the main poster painting. Oh, well that one's incredible. Because it's so like nice looking. But you said like, oh, it's that tagline in Indie

with the whip, you should make it clear that painting is like, that poster is like a Drew Struzan painting of Indiana Jones at like a Kmart photo studio. It is like a high school like head and shoulders turning to the camera. Three quarter profile. I think they settled on a really nice tagline for the main poster, which is have the adventure of your life keeping up with the Joneses. I think that's a clever way to do the family.

Yeah, that's all. Here's what I'd say. This movie kind of needs no tagline. You just like put the poster out and you're like, here it is, the third Indiana Jones movie and Sean Connery is his dad? But that's why I think they're saying the dad thing because they're like, what's the dad? They want you to know about the dad. It's not just like a third Indiana Jones movie,

which would probably be enough. Just like Indiana Jones, he's here. It is a little bit sad that they didn't come up with keeping up with the Joneses first. I think keeping up with the Joneses is just really clever. That was the second swing though. You know, that shouldn't have been. No. Not only is it the second swing,

but it's also like the second beat of the second swing. And here's a cool Japanese poster, which has River Phoenix on it. That's pretty cool. I think River Phoenix is so fucking good in this movie. And I love that sequence so fucking much. Well, we'll get right into it because it's the first good in this movie. And I love that sequence so fucking much. We'll get right into it

because it's the first sequence in the movie. I'm just gonna, I'm gonna get ahead of this, right? This is my favorite Indiana Jones movies. I've said it in other episodes. I know it is objectively not the best. I know that Raiders does basically everything this movie does better. They are so similar.

And similarly, I'm like, I can't argue that it's better than the opening fertility idol sequence of Raiders. But the River Phoenix sequence is my favorite Indiana Jones sequence, which is absurd to say when it doesn't have Harrison Ford in it. That is absurd. That's that's borderline absurd. Not saying it's the best. Not saying it's the best. I have so much fun watching it. It's really great. It's really great. That is absurd. That's borderline absurd. Not saying it's the best. Not saying it's the best.

I have so much fun watching it. It's really great. It's really great. It is really great. Last Crusade is my favorite, but it also, I have really been thinking hard, and I don't know if I'm supposed to jump in yet. I never know.

You can. I've never known. Absolutely. This was, I did briefly have to think, I thought, I was like, was this the first movie my dad ever took me to see in a theater? Interesting.

1989, how old would you have been? I was nine. But I realized it wasn't. I researched- Right, it feels a little old for you to be. Some of the first movies, I actually, it made me research the first movies I ever saw in the theater, and the first movie I believe I saw in the theater is actually really,

really, to me, quite funny. Which was that I started breaking down the earliest movies I remember. It was like this, and American Tale, Home Alone, and Batman. Right, but these are all 89, 90, 91, like that era. Then there was an early Outlier, which is that my dad clearly had no one to go with

and did bring me to see Star Trek IV. Hell, theater! That's a great movie. But for a six year old? Yeah. For a six year old. But that movie. First experience in a movie is the fourth sequel.

Well, sure, story wise. But you know what, it's fun because it's like they're in, they're out of fish out of water and there's the whales. It's a pretty gentle movie. It is maybe the Star Trek movie that is most accessible to a six yearold with zero context, which is like space people in modern day San Francisco being confused by like cabs and shit

and then giant flying whales. It does have like almost police academy style gags. Yes, it does. And it's a really well executed version of that too. It's like, it's fun. I will say though, all of these things, I love your defense of it. I have a feeling that if I sat my father down and said,

why is the first movie I ever saw in the theater Star Trek 4? He'd be like, your mom didn't wanna go. It was that or me sitting by myself in a way that would have made me sad. Right, right, right. Do you remember liking it? I remember liking the experience of seeing a movie. But Indiana Jones, the part of why I felt like Last Crusade

might have been the first movie I ever saw was, I was like, I do have those sense memories, and I'm so glad to get to talk about them here, where I'm like, this is perhaps the movie, more than Raiders for me, because of the theater experience. Like, this is the movie that makes me feel how you want movies to make you feel. This is my thing with it.

I'm like, I know Raiders is better. And I watch Raiders more because I'm like, I want to study this. It is such a miracle of like construction and craft. And yet I just have so much fun watching this. And I'm like, this is a perfect example of like what I want out of just like fun, well-made popcorn, well-performed. I like this movie a lot. Chris, though, you had some thought,

I feel like you were completing, maybe not. Just the idea of like, this will always be my favorite Indiana Jones, because I saw it in the theater. I also have such a, I'm 95% certain it was attached to this movie that, because this was 1989, I started reading comic books around 1987, 88, and I have a very distinct memory that someone might correct me, Lord knows your fans will be the first ones

to tell me if I'm right or wrong. No idea what you're talking about. Our Sweetie Pie fans. I love your fans, I love them. And it's also, I also wanna say it's nice too, because a lot of other times I've been on, there's been natural segues into Star Wars stuff, and I get, I know your fans't think I talk about Star Wars too much

But I don't really see too many connections between this movie and Star Wars. Oh between the George Lucas produced film Indiana Jones, you're saying Star Wars. No, so this one I feel like we can just keep it separate. It's just it's a streamlined episode. Hey, as the offspring told us. So they have the same start. We gotta keep them separated. Colonel Veer's stunning performance as Walter Donovan in this one. I love that guy! But I do remember seeing a trailer for the cap, the Matt Salinger, Captain America, that I think was before this movie. That lines up.

I've heard a lot of people talk about that. That's a 1990 film, so that would have been appropriate. The Captain America shield came up and a few nerds in the theater flipped out, but this was an era in my life where I had been reading comics for two years in isolation. And all of a sudden- So you were like, oh, there are others like me.

I'm in a room with people who like being- Yeah, although I feel like that was like a nadir for comic book captain America. Like late 80s, he was very uncool. X-Men had become so cool. Yeah. Like the Avengers were kind of not that cool. Is it like Nomad era or is Nomad about to happen?

It's probably around there. Nomad might be earlier. We are in the very fascinating 10-year plus run by Mark Grunwald, which has the best Captain America's ever been and also some of the most inexplicably atrociously bad writing you've ever seen in a comic book. I should do a deeper... I've never really read Cap in like like, a sort of thoughtful way. Well, because you're not a patriot.

Right. I just am not a patriot. No, it's because I'm a U.S. agent guy, actually. I just love that guy. When you dive into the Mark Ruhnwald run of Captain America, you know who to text if you need to have a really big conversation about it. He's... Yeah, it's funny. Like, he's not someone like his rogues gallery, I'm not that familiar. Yeah, I don't know. I loved, obviously, it's funny. Like, he's not someone, like his rogues gallery,

I'm not that familiar, yeah, I don't know. I loved, obviously, when Captain America, I go cool again when Brubaker did him, right? When suddenly it was like, whoa, Captain America's like dark spy stuff and this is so cool. I loved all that. I feel like I've heard a lot of folks of your generation talk about that experience of the Captain America trailer

being pretty widely attached to Last Crusade in the same summer that Burton's Batman has just come out and feeling like oh shit it's all happening. Like if you've just seen Batman work and you see the Captain America teaser that's the shield you have to think like holy shit they're all gonna happen now every year they're gonna make all of them they're all gonna work with the public and then it's like Captain America comes out is like muddled with is a nothing movie disappears Batman basically becomes the only superhero that works until the 2000s. We're also people I think some Younger people sometimes forget we are also now not again. I don't want to dwell on it, but we're also now

Far enough away from Return of the Jedi that liking Star Wars is getting decidedly lame. Star Wars has become like cheesy kid shit, I feel like. Before the re-releases of the original trilogy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, for sure. Actually, before the toys got cool again. It's in its weird kind of swampy. I love what you're fucking setting up here.

Right? I was gonna correct you on the toys thing and the fact that you fucking got to it. The toys got cool, the re-releases happened, Star Wars got cool again, but we are in a stretch where liking, like wearing an X, like I liked the X-Men by this point, I would never wear an X-Men t-shirt to school. No, when I say the X-Men were cool, I mean they were cool in the sense of like

they had become Marvel's biggest star, but obviously comic books were main. They were the coolest thing within comic books. And where, again, to tie into the culture too, let's not also forget Griffin, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is in the process of about to explode. Like nerd shit is about to hit, and this movie. But it's got its own little quadrant, right?

Like it's not like now where it's the main thing in culture. But yes, this movie. This movie made you feel good about being an unabashed fan. Yeah. For the first time in my... That cycle has always spun, but in my life cycle, being in that theater, hearing those people flip out,

being there with my dad, I'm like, man, it's just the movie that probably more than any other imprinted in me the feeling of like, I want to sit here. I want to eat popcorn. I want it to be dark. I want everybody to be quiet. I also feel like... Generations of people molded by Spielberg giving you that beautiful feeling. 89 is a year that for better or worse starts to feel like the year that sets

Hollywood on the course to where it is today. Like you look at the 89 blockbusters and you're like, this is a good slate, but also the studios kind of become obsessed with chasing this line. They start chasing Dick Tracy almost immediately But it's like because last I believe Last Crusade Batman and Ghostbusters 2 all break opening weekend records. It's like the record gets broken like three times in one summer Mm-hmm. You've brought this up many, many times. Next thing you know, everyone's having panic attacks in San Diego. Wait, I don't get it.

Comic Con. Comic Con culture. Oh, oh, sure, sure, right. This might be the snowball down the hill that leads to Comic Con culture. I think it all kind of... You are not wrong. Next thing you know, you're on the subway with someone head to toe. I now have it. I can now read it. Because you always say this and then I just, I'm always like,

I can't tell how to look this up, but here are the opening weekend records. It was held by Beverly Hills Cop 2 with $26 million opening weekend in 1987. Last Crusade beats that with a 29. Ghostbusters 2 then beats that with like 29.4, you know, like slightly higher. And then Batman does four. And then Batman does. And then Batman crushes that at the end of the year in 1999 with $40 million, which is then beaten by Batman Returns.

Yeah. So it holds for like three years. Yep. And then Jurassic Park, Batman Forever beats Jurassic Park, people forget, 52 mil. And then Lost World beats Batman Forever. What do you think beat Lost World? People kind of forget about this, because Spider-Man becomes the famous,

the first movie to open over $100 million. Is it Sorcerer's Stone? Harry Potter. Yeah, 90. Because I remember people being like, is Harry Potter going to be the first movie with $100 million weekend? It's a little below. And it made like 94, 90. And people were like, you know what?

I guess it's just mathematically impossible There was no way to have that many times that many it's right And then the following year not even like six months later Spider-man does 114 and people were like, holy shit Impossible, and then you get to like a decade plus later Avengers endgame does like 114 opening day Avengers. Oh, oh end, Endgame did, yeah, yeah, sure. It did 357. I wonder if that'll ever be beaten.

I guess it will one day. But this movie did break the record, like you say, Griffin, and it does, it is a year of sequels and comic books and also like The Little Mermaid, so like that, you know, that element rising again, there's the cartoon, you know, movies. Yeah, it's a year of like, right,

this is what we want the industry to be. But you also have, look who's talking, Dead Poets Society, you have non-franchisey things, like you have a big comedy, you have a big adult- One of those becomes a franchise. Yeah, yeah. Dead Poets Society, two to dead to poets. Yeah Poets Society Tokyo Drift, you know, we can keep anyway. Look, this is blank check with Griffin David. I'm Griffin David

It's a podcast about filmography is directors who have massive success early on in their careers They're given a series of blank checks make whatever crazy passion products they want And sometimes those checks clear and sometimes they bounce baby this is a mini series on the films of Steven Spielberg, first half of his career. And we're talking today about Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade. His third of four Indiana Jones movies. That he directed.

That he directed. His third of his four. For many years, the fairly satisfying conclusion to the Indiana Jones series and now the middle entry in the Indiana Jones series, technically. It is weird to be like that is, this is now the exact midpoint. And it's another thing where like, you talk about that Star Wars dead zone.

I know that was a little before David and I's time, but I've dug into it a lot, because I do think it's a fascinating thing that's basically been culturally forgotten, which is that like, Star Wars just kind of goes away for 10 years. And is like a thing. It was dead on the vine.

Right. It's like hard coordinates are keeping it alive at a very low burn in a way that like. Yeah, you know the little books and the. Well, everyone loves those Timothy Zahn books now. Yeah, that's right. The Grand Admiral Thawne shit, and it's coming back in the Filoni version.

But it was a little. If you were reading those Timothy Zahn books. Yes. You were a door. You were a rooster. I would have equated to the period between original Star Trek and canceled in the movies, right? Where you're like, there's a small fervent group of people who are digging into the ship.

But that period is shorter and that period is like, it's like those people were cultivating a cult show. They were like, we need to keep this cult show that didn't get that many viewers alive. Star Wars, it's like, these were the biggest movies in the world, they're just done. But the fans are like, well, we want more, so we'll just sort of write, we'll read some books,

and we'll, but like, it was like, you know, Star Wars fandom was wide and thin, and Star Trek fandom was like more concentrated and small. But the other part of it is that like, you know, Lucas very early on was like I'm gonna do nine Right and then after return the Jedi people were like that's not fucking happening And he so quickly does the two Ewok movies and is like and I'm doing two cartoon shows and droids and Ewoks in the Ewok Movies all kind of don't really hit in the way

I think he hoped like and we try as someone who was alive then, like the Ewok movies, we watched them, we were ready, we were confused. We knew what they were. To give you a sense, and this will age me, everyone will know that I am truly an exenial, that this micro generation, the Oregon Trail generation, as some of you recall, the exenials, we had Apple IIEs with Oregon Trail

in our classrooms. Here's what it meant to be a Star Wars fan, is that I was on a pre-worldwide web internet where you would dial in from your computer to individual BBSs. And when I tell you there was one that I found in Whippany, New Jersey, that had an archive of Star Wars fan art that you could spend hours

downloading on your 2400K. It would take you a 2400K moment. But like, oh, someone drew a picture of an AT-AT walker and you can dial this BBS and download it because someone's making fan art. Like the level of loser dim that I just described that I actively participated in and was that kid, of like, I like Star Wars,

so I have a floppy disk of fan art that I'm downloading from a BBS in Whippany, New Jersey. Like, that's where we were at. This idea that every store was gonna be stocked with lightsabers, that there would be an entire theme park to go get lost in the immersive experience of this. No, you're using your computer to sit for hours communicating with another computer in Whippany, New Jersey.

That's what you have to do. You have talked to me about, and not said with sadness, just kind of an objective reality, that when you were starting out at the UCB Theater, you were like, the cheat code is, if you make a Star Wars reference, everyone in the theater will laugh. Especially when you were on the road doing college shows.

Because you're just like, the people who come to improv shows are the exact people who have this knowledge base in their head, and they don't hear other people say it out loud. And you even look at early Conan O'Brien, and there's a similar thing of them making jokes about deep-cut Star Wars characters, which is like, they know their audience.

They're gonna pop if they hear Lobot or Bossk, right? And you're like, now if you say that people are like, yeah, Bossk is at Walmart. Everybody, my kid knows who Bossk is already. Everyone knows who Bossk is. My five year old son is a Bossk kid. Your kid's gonna know about Bossk. I don't, I actively also, I just wanna say,

I did not come here to talk about Star Wars. No, of course not, We're not talking about it. I had a real firm intent to not dwell too much on Star Wars. So just understand that this is a cultural discussion about the impact of 1989 that I did not lead everybody. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. When you're seeing this in theaters, Chris... Let's say our guest today...

Oh, sorry. Go ahead. I didn't realize we hadn't introduced him. These people know these blankies know who the fuck I am. I'm the bad boy of blank checks. They forgot about Chris. The bad boy of blank checks. This is deaf blank check jam. Hamburger.

I'm scared of you motherfuckers. I just did a show with Hamburger. Really? A month ago I did a show with the real Alonzo Hamburger Jones. Holy shit. In New Jersey I got a text from a club booker that was like, hey if you're free tonight, we're just doing a show, bunch of people dropping in, Hamburger's gonna be here.

I was like in the car before I could even hit reply. This is incredible. How did he do? Of course! He had a fucking cowboy hat and he said the word hamburger 45 times in a ten minute set! Right, it's like Hanson, I'm like, they better play Mbop, but they play Mbop, I'm like, I got what I wanted! The whole thing is he says hamburger instead of swear words.

Instead of swear words, but it's almost become like an OCD compulsion. Like, he'll hit a punchline and then in between the set up as next Joe, he'll be like, and here's the punchline in the rhythm hamburger and here's the set up for the next one hamburger! It started out like curse words and now it's become like the Smurf as next Joe. He'll be like, and here's the punchline in the rhythm, hamburger, and here's the set up for the next one, hamburger. It started out like curse words and now it's become like the Smurf saying Smurf. It's wild though, but he also was, I'm not making fun of him.

Hamburger was fucking great. He's been doing it forever. But it was also fun because it was a bunch of very young New Jersey comics in the green room and Hamburger, who predates me by many, many years. But then I walked in and was like, everyone's just sitting quietly, not talking to Hamburger, who predates me by many, many years. But then I walked in and was like, everyone's just sitting quietly, not talking to Hamburger. I'm gonna sit down and ask Hamburger some questions,

and then the whole room gathered up and showed their respect and listened to the stories of Alonzo Hamburger Jones. That fucking rules. Hamburger. Chris Gethered. Yes. You did our live show last year for the ninth anniversary. I think that was the last my presence has been felt on blank check.

This is true and you made a bit about you guys are afraid to have me back on. Which you always think you'll make the joke publicly and then you'll text me and you'll be like I get it if you guys don't want the heat I don't take it personally. This is his fifth episode. Yes. Yeah. Now it is kind of crazy that it's been five spread out over 10 years, but I also think you're a high impact guest.

We want the right pairing. You text me four times a year and you were haranguing us about this right before the record. When are you guys doing Kurosawa? When are you doing a Kiru? That's the episode I want. You walked in here today and you went, you guys call yourself a movie podcast. Isn't this supposed to be a movie podcast?

Where's Kurosawa? I'll pull back the curtain. Edit it out if you have to. I said, when are you guys doing Karasawa? David Sims's response was that's just so many movies and I went Funny rejoinder is that is that not take half a year would take half a year for us to do You don't have to do all... That's the whole fucking thing that we do! In this format, the only workaround is we split it in half,

which is what we did with Spielberg. We did half of Spielberg seven years ago, and now we're only finally getting around to the first half. I do get that, like, you're not scrambling to watch a six-hour long reinterpretation of Hamlet in his... In his color fit. I get it. Rips. But do the people not want to hear you guys talk about fucking Yojimbo? Am I crazy here that they don't want to hear your piece on this? I think it rips movies good, but do the people not want to hear you guys talk about fucking yo Jimbo Am I crazy here that they don't want to enjoy it? I think it's an aspiration Yeah, I think there's a certain level of people at person

But I just do want to say I often times have texted you guys like hey if you can't have him back I get it, and I just need to be clear I'm not ever setting out to make your fans furious of course not I don't want to you're the nice guy podcast I'm not trying to get people mad, but if they get mad to a degree where I find it funny and unreasonable, I will at that point be the heel. You did a bit at our live show

where you played into that and played the heel, and my manager, who I don't think has ever listened to an episode of the podcast, texted me and said, that angry nerd was hilarious, where did you find him? Look at that, where did you find him, Griffin? But this is the thing.

When I was someone shepherding you in your early career. Absolutely. This is how bad things have gotten for Chris Gethard. Where did you, Griffin, discover Gethard? This is what's wild to me, is the amount of time she's had to hear me talk about you. They don't even know these people. It's, if I remain on the fringe.

When I was like, that's Chris Gethard, and she was like, oh. People don't, yeah. It's not like she doesn't know who Chris Gethard is, but it was like disconnected for her. No, I get it. I think also you came in, started speaking from the crowd, started riling people up.

We maybe never properly introduced you because everyone was like, we know who the fuck this is. Also, the way you asked me to do that show was, we're doing this thing at town hall. Can you come do the Gethard thing? Right, come like, essentially. Play this thing at town hall. Can you come do the gethers thing? Right. Come like essentially. Play full heel. Be a full like fucking New World Order.

Can I just say one quick thing? And I'm not apologizing. We talked a lot about Spider-Man 2 on the Spider-Man 2 episode. I think we talked about... Did my bit miss? Maybe. There are people where I've read their opinions that they were looking forward to that episode and felt let down by it, and I feel very sad about that because it's one of my favorite movies. That episode's good. I mean, they're... I had cold bits.

Yeah, they're external factors. If there was a problem... Right. When I read some people on the blank check subreddit going, this guy, his show got canceled and he's been cut from every movie and I'm happy, I go, maybe there's something to he's been cut from every movie and I'm happy, I go, maybe there's something to be said for the culture of Reddit and fandom and where they cross over

that some of you could do some soul searching. I'm not setting out to piss everybody off. No, I agree with you. And this is why I'm bringing all of this up. This is why I'm bringing all of this up. At the end of your bit, you walk off stage and we had a moment of genuine, earnest reflection in which we just called out,

this whole podcast doesn't happen without you. We used to watch your show, we were obsessed with you, you know, exactly. But, I mean, yeah, it's like basically David and I bond over the ritual of the Gethers show every week. David wrote a very nice review, and I believe you interviewed him about that review for the Gethers show. No, Alissa, who saw both of us being really active

in the community was like, you guys should be friends. But also, I meet fucking Hosley because Creek in the Cave hires him to take over as producer of all of their podcasts, but specifically, Talkin' TCGS. Which was a weird breakout. Which Riley and I were already doing. He comes in midstream. There was a stretch where that podcast was,

I think, getting as many listens as the show was getting views. And it maybe even started to, at times, threaten it. We were like, we can't have the podcast analyzing the show. More popular than the TV show. That's a bad sign of the show's future. What was the platform the episodes used to be on? Do you remember there was the website where they would go, like the archived episodes

before you were uploading that to YouTube. And I'm trying to remember the name of that place. Blink TV? I think so. Blip TV? Blip TV. There was the website where they would go, like the archived episodes before you were uploading that to YouTube. I remember the name of that place. Blink TV? I think so. Blip TV? Blip TV. Blip TV.

Blip.TV. What I remember is reporting to you. Imagine if the Gethardt Show existed when Twitch and Discord were. Insane. I mean it's a different world. We're out here slugging it out on Blip TV. I remember telling you how the first episode

of the podcast talking about the show had done, and you said, that's more listens than Blipp TV reports we get per episode. And it forced you to look under the hit and be like, is Blipp TV's algorithm wrong? Like, do they not know how to actually measure things? And hey, turns out I was wrong. If we see everything that's happened with Blipp TV

since then, my paranoia was incorrect. I should have trusted in Bli measure views. And hey, turns out I was wrong. If we see everything that's happened with BlipTV since then, my paranoia was incorrect. I should have trusted in BlipTV. But this is... Was. You always love a Wikipedia entry in the search for was. And now you're on a platform.

Ten years of blank check, a decade of dreams. It feels very important to have you back on. You're getting them mad at me right now because they're going just talk about Last Crusade. Guys, why do all the Gethird episodes have these long ones? I'm actually getting mad. Let's talk about Indiana Jones.

David's been missing a movie today. I'm being a really good boy. He's been a great boy. I think we're mirroring the movie in that we're starting off the episode by talking about the early days. Correct. But now we're gonna swing into talking about the subject.

Geth, tell me about your relationship with Indiana Jones up until the point of seeing this movie. Had you seen the others? The first one I see is Last Crusade in the theater. The second one I see is that my parents used to take me, there was a campground called Otter Lake, it's still there, it's in the Poconos. North Jersey, that's a good, cheap vacation,

go camping at a campground in the Poconos. This campground is one of these places that has a camp store, that's the first place I ever bought comic books. They also did movie nights. And I see Raiders as part, it's screened at a campground in like a little outdoor pavilion,

which is a really beautiful way to see Raiders. In your memory, is it a print? Are they like showing a print or are they like projecting a VHS? It's a VHS. It's a VHS. I would be shocked if they had. No, they weren't. They didn't ever project her out there. We went to very different summer camps.

This is true. This is true. I'm not going to deny it. It's the old days. Touching on things that make listeners angry. I'm not going to deny it. All right. My parents were like, where's the cheapest place we can go? These people probably like literally prop up a big screen TV.

No, it was on a screen. They would project DVDs at my summer camp. But I do feel like there was a weird culture. It's the only reason I asked the follow up question. There was a weird culture of like 16 millimeter prints existing of blockbuster movies that were basically just for like Boy Scouts. Yeah, I wouldn't be shocked. Her showing in my memory, it wasn't...

Like, I want to tell you that I can still hear, like, the crickets and smell campfires and hear the, like, of the film starting. But probably VHS. Probably a VHS. But I would argue, crusade in the theater and then double back to Raiders of the Lost Ark with your parents at a summer camp surrounded by other kids. Like, that is 80s... That's an 80s childhood. lost arc with your parents at a summer camp surrounded by other kids. This is the stuff of childhood dreams.

That's an 80s childhood. And then do you immediately jump to Temple to fill that in? Temple I don't see for a few years. From what I remember, one of my best friends in high school and later one of my college roommates, he has a VHS of Temple that I watch. I don't watch until high school. I don't think I saw Temple until just, it was randomly on TV or whatever.

But I do feel like a lot of the most iconic things I knew about Indiana Jones before seeing any of them were images from Temple, which is weird. I think we talk about it in that episode, but there was such a media frenzy around look how fucking Jack Terrison Ford got for Temple, that I think the imagery of him with like the ripped off sleeve and the machete and his chest showing

was for a long time kind of just one of the most repeated Indiana Jones images. And him tied up to a stake. I remember feeling like that was really scary in my head. And again, I haven't rewatched all of them for recent purposes, and I know, I will also say too, I'm not obsessive with Indiana Jones. Him, the big ball chasing him, that's Temple as well. That's Raiders, that's the iconic image then. They were jumbled up in my mind, but yes,

it's Last Crusade in the theater, it's Raiders at a summer camp. You're making me realize all three Indies have a big he's tied to something scene. Like the first one has him in Marianne while the arc is being open the second one has him tied up while they're like Hypnotizing him when he's tied to his own dad. Yes, and that yeah, and they talk about fucking they're talking about talking about fucking Tied to your dad the bondage they're talking about fucking a I mean we have to talk about this later It's a huge part of this movie. A movie that is largely airy fun with this sort of silly weird thing

at the center of it of like, they become Eskimo brothers. They both had sex with the same woman who again... Like back to back, dude. Also though, like the psychology of Steven Spielberg... making the Nazi that they both had sex with... undeniably super hot in her Nazi outfit is, I am now old enough to realize the psychological layers of that are very short. I want to see if there's anything on that in the dossier because I do wonder.

She's, when she's dressed as a Nazi, yowza. Empire of the Sun. I mean, I agree. Empire of the Sun is the episode right before this, correct? Yeah. Just because we've been recording a little out of order? Correct. Okay, so Bilga, our friend Bilga Beary on that episode, put forward the notion that the big shift in Spielberg's career is like at about the midway point, he shifts from the perspective of making movies from the vantage point of a son to making movies from the vantage point of a father and that this is kind of the

fulcrum movie because it's dealing with both sides of that. Sure, sure. Which is very interesting to me and I think through that prism this movie's relationship to sexuality is very interesting and how weird like Spielberg's relationship to depicting any form of sex in movies or even really talking about it is but also so much of his core trauma being related to the like cuckolding of his dad and being too aware of the sexual lives of his parents and all this sort of shit it is just funny that this movie is like an Eskimo Brothers family adventure comedy that just kind of like won't move on

from that but that also it's like You've set up these Indiana Jones movies that have this sort of like James Bond style We're gonna have a new love interest every movie and then this one basically does the fake out of just like she's not a love interest She's a villain and for the second half the movie It's gonna be him and his dad kind of having weird conversation about the fact that they both fucked her in the past. I also have been rewatching, I just finished really deeply meaningful to me, rewatched the original Star Wars trilogy with my five year old, which anybody who's heard me on the show can imagine that that was like very, very real for me.

But I am. Was he like D plus? No, he. Medium. He loved them. Of Medium. He loved them. Of course. He loved them. And you know what else?

Here's a thing that's really, really cool to see. I'm not going to talk about Star Wars. I mean, he did love... This movie has so little to do with Star Wars. We can't focus on it too much. Loved Obi-Wan. Like, loved Obi-Wan loved every time Obi-Wan came back. It is sad to see though that kids now grow up with enough spoilers that like another

kid had told him... You already know. ...about Luke and Vader. Yeah. He knew so much about Yoda that you realize the magic of this little impish creature. Right, turning out to be a wise old... They all, like, he had... I wish I could have seen that cold.

I mean... I saw it cold and it blew my mind. I think I already knew, like, Yoda's wise. But the reason I want... The only reason I wanted to Bring it up because I don't want to dive down the Star Wars rabbit hole Is that both Han Solo in Indiana Jones are also by modern standards and who cares? But I'm like, oh Harrison Ford played a real good sex pest. I don't think Indiana Jones. Okay, so here's I don't know

Here's a flower I don't know man. Here's my take. He's like, here's a flower. He's a little. He's a peppy lapu level in the Venice scene. I agree with you. He gets off the boat with her, he basically starts rubbing his dick over his pants.

I know. He's like, I don't know, I gotta fuck this broad. Like instantaneously. Beth, can we just get that sound clean one more time? I don't know. I agree with you and it speaks to how good Spielberg's story math brain is at this point where he's like, if we later find out she's a Nazi, the audience won't hold it against

him. He's so smoking hot. But I also think... Like to the point where he's still trying to save her as she tries to steal the Holy Grail one last time. He's like, no, no, no, come on. You gotta get back over here like you're like oh man She's that scene is interesting. We'll talk about that. I

Find Willie Scott so annoying She's one of my least favorite characters in the history of movies and part of what I find annoying about her is as we've covered in This app with that episode it feels like a character who's trying to stop Indiana Jones from being an Indiana Jones movie and The tension between the two of them is just him being like, I'm Indiana Jones. Sooner or later, she's going to fuck me. I'm just kind of sitting here being like, okay, lady until she finally breaks down. Right. What I think they correctly identified and sort of recalibrating for this movie is

like, man, you know, what's Ford magic? And the thing they stumbled upon that you wouldn't think would be his superpower is like the back and forth between him and Leia and this guy who's so fucking cool and confident being a little flummoxed by like, fuck, I wish I didn't care about you. And you can actually needle me. There's character growth with... I was gonna say too... Marion has that because of the history, and fucking Henry Jones Sr. has that,

where it's fun to watch Indiana Jones be like, "'Duh! Fuck! I'm pretending I don't care.'" I also want to say, too, I'm not bringing it up to be like, "'Sex, piss, let's cancel Harrison Ford's early characters.'" Just like, oh, society has changed. This does... This does feel jarring. Like, my kid will watch Indiana Jones someday and be like, it's kind of aggressive with girls, Dad.

Like, it's... You go, oh. I'm not saying... Like, I don't care and I'm not looking for a debate on it, but I'm just like, oh, whoa, like, the shifts stand out. That, like, this was the most charming motherfucker of our childhood, twice! Two franchises, him charming the shit charming motherfucker of our childhood. Twice! Two franchises, him charming the shit out of all of us. And it does...

You do flag it pretty quickly in 2025. I just think there's an interesting kind of rug pull on this movie, like, sort of emasculating him halfway through, because the second his dad enters, it's like he's infantilized, and also his dad's like... Instantaneously calls him sir. Rightized and also his dad's like... Instantaneously calls him sir. Right. And also his dad's like, yeah, I fucked her.

You know? And it's just sort of like it kind of defangs that weird sexual element of him in a way where it's like now he's like a little boy. Also, the reveal comes via she talks in her sleep, which I think famously was an improvised line. It's a very good line. Either improvised or maybe suggested by someone. But let's open the dossier. David, boing, boing, boing. You hear that? Boing, boing, boing. It's a boinging noise.

No, that's a spring, because spring has sprung. True. Spring movie preview, David. What do we got? We got some great stuff. Upcoming films. Coming to regal theaters that we want to direct our listeners towards Minecraft sign up for Eagle unlimited. Mm-hmm and go see the Minecraft movie. Excuse me a Minecraft movie. Ah, just the one I think an interesting titling structure on that one Do you know that film is directed by Jared Hess? Isn't that bizarre? Sure. You're more struck by this than I. I think we should all be talking about this. I think this should be front page news.

Yeah, but you've also got Drop getting great reactions out of South by Southwest from horror movies. Chris Harland. Yeah, exactly. You've got Alex Garland's Warfare. Okay. Have you seen that? Well, I'm not sure I can talk about it. Well, well, interesting. You've got the new Joan Colette Sarah movie, The Woman in the Yard is coming in late March. I'm very, very excited for it. Written by Sam Stefanik. The amateur, a high-concept Rami Malek thriller that seems to have the premise What if Griffin Newman in action movie? You know, and that's directed by the guy who did One Life. It's really interesting. Really? Interesting.

We got Sinners coming. Ah, I'm so pumped for Sinners. Kugler and Jordan are back. Yes, that's actually really gonna rock. And of course, friend of the show, Bone Yang and the Wedding Banquet. A remake of a film we've covered on this show, written, co-written and starring a past and future guest.

The accountant too, this is Spring, you're bling-bling everywhere. Spring is for real. Spring is for real. So, well, why are we talking about it? Because of Regal. Because this is a perfect opportunity to sign up for Regal Unlimited.

What's awesome about all this is that there's lots of interesting different kinds of movies in theaters that you can go see. And with Regal Unlimited, the whole point is you sign up and seeing three, four, five, six of those movies is easy and affordable. Sign up now in the Regal app or the link in the description in our show notes and use code blankcheck to get 20% off your three month subscription. And then you're going to be in the Crown Club. You're going to get gonna get rewards you're gonna build up points

You can get free popcorns and sodas and upgrades Candy on Tuesdays 50% off popcorn discounted ticket to the Regal Crown Club website. And as I said, it's a little deep It's a little buried in here. There is a section where you can redeem your points for old Promotional movie memorabilia like red one socks, right? Follow the link in the show notes, go to the Regal app, click on the unlimited banner, and then follow the instructions to sign up and enter promo code blank check

when prompted to receive your discount. And look, I'm just gonna say it again, David, signing up for Regal Unlimited, or maybe gifting a membership to a moviegoer in your life, great way to support the show. This is a dream advertiser, a dream partner for us. We want to keep this going. We think it could benefit everybody,

especially the movies. -♪ ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING. -♪ Before Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Steven Spielberg was supposed to make Rain Man. That was a masterful moment of leadership of you leading us out of our manic. Well, please, I'm gonna keep leading. And just to tell you, Geth,

things we've covered in the previous Indiana Jones movies. Spielberg really wanted to make James Bond. They kept rejecting him. Lucas comes to him and is like, I got a good idea. This is like the James Bond killer. But when he brings it to him, he's like, if you make it, you have to promise me you make three there's sort of this handshake deal of like I want this to be a franchise and I don't want you to run off and have shittier jaws sequels in your wake I need three out of you so

he's not contractually like tied on paper but he owes a third Indiana Jones movie. Like a pinky swear. Totally. I don't want to talk too much about George Lucas But they don't have much to do they're working on scripts for years, right? And it's just sort of not happening and Spielberg has this attitude of like I'm not gonna do the third one unless I like the Script because we kind of got eaten alive on template rain man Martin breast project Martin breast drops out Steven Spielberg works in that product for a long time Martin Bress drops out, Steven Spielberg works on that project for a long time. Of course, he eventually drops out for reasons that Griffin is kind of setting up,

and Barry Levinson takes over and wins Best Picture and Best Director. And Best Director. Which are trophies that Spielberg obviously was hunting for in the 1980s. Also interesting to think about him potentially working with Tom Cruise 15 years earlier than he actually was working with Dustin and Tom Cruise on it like it's a whole thing and he says they just could not get the script where he wanted it and They hit this point where? They were planning on an indie, you know indie three Memorial Day

1989 and he was like I'm just gonna have to stop doing rain Man because like I won't have enough time to do Indy essentially so, you know He's made a lot of grown-up movies right like before last crusade. He's made he's back-to-back made Colorful and the Empire of the Sun these two sort of like conscious Departures from like the Spielberg type of movie and Temple of of Doom is also like a Spielberg movie that's kind of fighting itself. I think the public is like, can you go back to doing something that's just fun? Can you go have fun? Be a showman again. The other movie, of course, that Spielberg almost does is Big,

which was written by his sister Anne. And he wanted Harrison Ford to play the part, you know, to play Joey, Joel, right? Yeah. Imagine Harrison Ford dancing on that big piano. I'm a little boy. Josh, Josh. Harrison Ford at FAO Schwartz.

I just don't see that at all. I want to design toys. Just pointing his finger at people. I like candy. He decides that he would be stealing his sister's thunder in a way. That's the way he sort of puts it. And he, I don't know, he steps aside. Which, look, I think was smart and like the path works out better for everyone involved.

Harrison Ford has had kind of a great run post Temple of Doom. He does Witness, gets an Oscar nomination. I still think it's one of his best movies. Turns out Witness, very good. Every screenwriting book talks about it. Witness is incredible. Then he does another movie. Chinatown and Witness.

Another movie with Peter Weir, Mosquito Coast, that I feel like at the time is mixed reception, but is a good movie. He talks about that as being a real turning point in his career of like, this is not what the public wants out of Harrison Ford. I can't fight it. They're like, they're bought into the brand

and they don't care about me going and doing something I find interesting. They want to see me play the hits. But it's an excellent film with an excellent performance. And then in 8080, it is frantic. That's not a huge hit, although it's not a bad movie, the Polanski movie. And Working Girl, which is a great hit for him and I think a nice swerve in terms of the kind of thing he can do. It's a good diversification movie

of just like this guy's movie star like power is expanding. While Spielberg and Ford are off doing all this stuff, George Lucas, who we're not gonna talk about much, apparently. That would have that much to do with this movie. Is developing whatever this will be, tentatively initially the Monkey King was the name of this entry. Which is like ancient Chinese mythology, a very big figure. He says at first he had said to Steven Spielberg,

like, what about the Holy Grail? And Steven Spielberg had been like, meh. Then he, you know, he goes over to The Monkey King, oh, I see, Spielberg says when was said Holy Grail, he was like, are we gonna have like rabbits jumping out of, you know, like he was like Monty Python. I think Monty Python. Oh, in his mind, the like, the shadow of Monty Python was too big to take Holy Grail seriously.

I guess so. We get back, we get back. Yeah, I like that. So right, so this Monkey King idea, which Chris Columbus, a writer of Gremlins at that point, you know, sort of a... Is a big Amblin, yeah, in-house. Developed something, eventually is called

Indiana Jones in the Lost City of Sun Wu King. Okay. Not rolling off the tongue for me. Not that catchy. But has this prelude set in a haunted castle, which was something they'd thought about for Indy too, of like, what if we did like a big haunted Scottish castle with Indy?

And then mostly it's like set in the far east or whatever. This all gets junked. You know, they, they eventually just like forget it. Uh, there is, I think a script you can read out there though. Like there's something out there that people have found. And that's when George Lucas is like, please Holy grail. Can we do my idea for the Holy grail? There also have always been the rumors that Diane Thomas at some point was developing a version

that was the haunted castle expanded at large. The haunted castle thing was just around for a long time. They're, like, throwing a lot of shit at the wall, but Spielberg was like, I just did Poltergeist. I don't want to do another haunted house movie, even if it's a castle. Lucas is Holy Grail. Holy Grail. Spielberg is like, can we put his dad in it?

Spielberg basically takes total credit for like, I was the one who's like, holy grail is not that interesting to me, the dad thing is interesting. Weird, I wonder why Steven Spielberg was insistent on putting a complicated dad relationship into a movie. So he's like, we can do a character study here, like there can be some juice there,

and George Lucas says, how is that conducive to the grail search? Sounds like George was a real fun guy to chat with. George Lucas famously, how is that conducive to the grail search? Sounds like George was a real fun guy to chat with. George Lucas famously does not like using interiority to interrogate his own relationship to his father. It's just like, no, Darth Vader's just based on scary people. And so Lucas is like, well, the dad could be like the grail hunter in a way, right?

Like that could be the thing. And Ford likes that idea. They bring in Menomend Mahez, who wrote Color Purple. Uh-huh, of course. A Dutch white man who wrote the Color Purple. They don't like that script, so they bring in Menno Mahez, who wrote Color Purple. Uh-huh, of course. A Dutch white man who wrote the Color Purple. They don't like that script, so they bring in Jeff Boehm, who is the credited guy who had done the Lethal Weapon movies.

Big thing I read, Boehm said... BANTER! Yes. Well, also that in the Menho script, to a certain extent, Jones Sr. was the MacGuffin. You had this thing of like, he's been kidnapped, he's gone missing looking for it. You don't get to him until the very end of the movie.

And Jeff Bum's like, that's the halfway point. You want at least half a movie of them riffing off each other. I was actually shocked rewatching it to come in today. It's deeper into the existing movie than it is. It's 48 minutes in. Yes, that's Sean. Where I was like, oh, you already have a really good, fun 48 minutes. Like, imagine...

Before Sean Connery even appears. Yes. And imagine if he didn't enter until they, like, got to the cave at the end. You know, and you just... I feel like we talk about so many modern movies that do this. Especially, like, legacy sequels and shit. Where they're like, and then at the end, you bring out the old guy or whatever. And you're just like, no, we want to see it. Like, it feels like sometimes movies outthink the big blow up like pop at the end of the movie. And like,

they think that's the maximum impact and stringing the audience along in anticipation until that point you're like, no, we want to see the characters we like doing stuff. If you have a good hook, let it play out rather than let it be a twist. So, you know, I think they settled well, right, on what you're talking about. They... Initially, Lucas is imagining kind of an Olivier type, like an eccentric British guy. More prim and proper, perhaps. But Spielberg is immediately like, no,

James Bond. We need Sean Connery. Which is just like a billion dollar idea. Now, Sean Connery is only 12 years older than Harrison Ford, but I think they sell that just great. Ford looks weirdly young, like,

I guess, for his age. And Connery looked old. The fact that he let himself go bald and wasn't dying his hair and all that shit. You know, he's got the gray. I feel like... Lucas is a flat no. He's like, no, he's James Bond.

It's overwhelming. Too much. And Spielberg is correctly like, unlike James Bond at this point. And like Untouchables has recontextualized him in a really good way. And I also think the 12 year age difference I feel was like a movie. Fun fact that was, I heard a lot as a child of like you wonder something crazy and like books I read about movies are like in theater pre movie trivia and much like the box office record getting like beaten multiple times

I feel like there are now so many movies where you're like the mom is five years older where the 12 years between Connery and Ford doesn't feel that insane anymore, I'm also like, I kinda buy that Connery could've gotten someone pregnant when he was 12. Not to be gross about it. I don't think the movie is asking us to accept that. Thumbs down to that. That's your backstory.

I love that that's your backstory. Going off of that, sir. So, Sean, no, listen, listen. This is like one of these kids who's teachers- I'm gonna say some god money- I think this guy- Is having a really close relation with his history teacher. Dan Berger.

Perhaps some extra curricular studies. I'm picturing a 12 year old full beard. Full through puberty voice. Listen, the thing I have to say is relevant. Yes, David, yes, David. That's staying in by the way. Major Cut can stand down. They bring Connery the script. He has some notes he's shown Connery.

He comes over to George, according to Spielberg, and says, look, anything Indy does in the context of the story, I have done better. When he talks about sleeping with Elsa, right in that I slept with her too. That's Connery putting that in. Now, in that context, it sounds like Connery's idea was back to back. I do think it was a gift for the movie.

I do think they figured out the right way to execute that. Connery is so charming and funny in this movie. Is it fair to say he is to the Indiana Jones franchise, what Samuel Jackson is to the Die Hard franchise? This injection of joy and fun in the third one. I know what you're saying, right. The third movie getting like a kind of lift. The second one is wobbly and this killer performance brings it back in the lift.

We covered those last year. Right, and it was a similar thing, but we're just like, Die Hard 2 doesn't have a handle on what this is anymore and is just trying to repeat the same thing and find ways to flip it. You're right, where they're just like, we need to like balance this with something else. We need someone, I agree with you. I think that's a really good take. Thank you so much. And also solves their problem of like,

how do you top Marion? Connery's take is. Which is like, don't make it a new love interest. He thinks Indy is kind of a dork. I'm so nervous about the tension between Griffin's interjections and David's. No, I'm just trying to get. I got you, I got you. I'm on your team. I'm a good boy.

I'm truly just trying to read this great statement from Sean Connery, who's definitely not problematic in any way. I didn't want the father to be so much of a wimp. Aside from the fact that Indiana Jones is not as well dressed as James Bond. I mean, they're not really in the same dress area. But okay. The main difference between them is sexual. Indiana deals with women shyly.

In the first film, he's flustered when the student writes, I love you on her eyelids. James Bond would have had all those young coeds for breakfast. He used to just, you know... I do feel like they kind of trick Connery into playing more of a wimp than he realizes. By doing this bit of he's kind of like the whole movie being like, all these theatrics, it's unbecoming to do this fucking adventure hero shit. Like the intellectual aspect of it.

Even if he's like fucked Elsa first, it does have this vibe of just like, he is a man of letters, he is smarter and more mature, and he's unimpressed with everything he's doing. Gives him alpha energy of like, I don't know how to use these guns and planes and shit. And when they're in the car, he's just like, go faster, you know, or it's like...

A perfect balance of the two things. They found a way to satisfy his I Need to Be the Coolest Guy note in a way that is funny and gives Indiana Jones more to fight against in terms of feeling low status. But I also think some of that is to give credit to the filmmakers and the choices surrounding it. Like, is not some of that intentional in the themes of, like, nobody thinks their dad is cool when you're young.

And then you grow up and realize maybe your dad has done some cool stuff. And then obviously, the other side of the coin, which I think the idea of this being the fulcrum between son to father in Spielberg, you go, in a movie that is weirdly almost all set pieces and almost all big adventure fun, that line Sean Connery has of like, I never even told him anything, it would have taken five minutes. Weirdly emotional to watch as a dad right now

who has thought a lot about my relationship with my father and my relationship with my son. You did a great one-person show that is available for Pelicans? On Audible. On Audible. That is all about that, about you sort of re-examining your relationship

with your father through the prism of being a dad? That line always, I mean, I will also say, and I don't want to jump too far ahead, like, I do have such a distinct, you know, when you learn how movies work, some of the magic goes away. I remember being nine years old and when the tank went off the cliff, I was, I was like, oh shit. Oh, you bought it.

Indiana Jones is dead. Okay, okay. I Indiana Jones is dead. I had not been trained that that was never gonna happen. So that moment really stands out to me, but rewatching it today as a dad of like, I never, it would have taken five minutes. Here's the other thing I think this movie is very clever about, is like the real narrative spine of this thing,

or let's say the emotional spine of this, is that like Indiana Jones would tell you I'm nothing like my father. Right. I hate my father. Not hate, but he- Resent my dad. I didn't really know him. He and I didn't know each other. He was not good at, he was not there for me.

And I think it's the brilliance of the opening sequence, which kind of does this mislead of like, Indiana Jones had one encounter with this random stranger who seems so fucking cool and mythical that he modeled his whole life after him. And yet, this movie is like, Indiana Jones doesn't realize that he's become his father. That so much of what he does is informed by his father. He's like, I'm different. He accuses his dad of like, you bailed and dodged all responsibility

when the only reason he's here is because we watched him climb out of a window to not do his job at the university. Correct. And not to jump all the way to the end, but it's like the thing of Connery on the floor talking through the things he hopes Indiana Jones has digested about the grail

so that he can make it through the traps and Indy's running in his head and it being this sort of silent disconnected dialogue between the two of them. Although I would argue Griffin, and we can pin this for later, I would actually argue that the narrative spine of this movie strangely is an ode

to the wonders of transportation. Okay, well, I'm interested in that. You're lighting David up right now. I want to just say the other, the prologue, the Young Indiana Jones prologue is another George Lucas idea that Spielberg is also very resistant to kind of, against Spielberg being like, I've kind of done that, right? Like, I've done so much, you know, movies about kids and stuff.

Also, do we need to explain Indiana Jones? Which I'm like, this is the good version of what I hate every time a modern franchise movie tries to do it. This movie somehow just gives you 10 minutes with a lot of like, that's the first time with the whip, that's the first time with the hat, here's how we got the scar. I love it so much and part of it's that it's like,

they don't hit it with dialogue That it's all visual and that it moves so fast and that part of it is like Dismantling him is like this is like a show. This is like a posture, you know Are there any other films you guys can think of that do the little mini movie before the movie? Like Inglorious Basterds. Yeah, there's I feel's... I mean, my recent fave, The Empty Man. I like movies that do that, that are kind of like... Right, like we're gonna tell a whole contained little mood setting story. Some of the lore, some of the mythology.

And I do feel like that is a James Bond thing usually. So we're gonna have a whole little James Bond mission happen, and then credits, and then James Bond will begin the main mission, which may or may not be connected that much. There's maybe more of it in horror, like the opening of Screams a version of that. You know, the misdirects of like, this is your fake lead.

There's definitely lots of examples. But I do always love that. This one is beloved, right? In general, I would imagine, I would be shocked if there's any people that are like, the River Phoenix thing felt like extraneous. Part of it is the River Phoenix thing. I wonder at the time, he's really good.

He had worked with him on Mosquiticus, where he was his son. And like, they pitched this to Ford, and he's like, A, I think River Phoenix is a great actor. B, that's the working actor in his age group who looks the most like I looked at my, at that age. Have you guys looked up, I looked up the chubby wet friend. The chubby wet friend.

He has really good. The, the story of that actor is pretty fascinating. Really? Pretty fascinating. Who's the actor do you remember? I am remiss because I took a bunch of notes on my laptop which I did not bring, but that actor, look, if you... Is it fascinating in a way where if we start talking

about it on mic, it would bum us out? No, I don't think so. I think he, if I remember right now, he's like a fitness guru with a lot of opinions on having been in the Indiana Jones mini movie. Was he credited as chubby, wet? No, I forget his character's name, but he's just, he's a chubby friend

and he's strangely wet. He's sweaty to the degree of wetness through the entirety of the River Phoenix mini-movie. There is a desert. Yeah, no, it's a warranted wetness. Can I sidebar to Jeff Bohn for a moment? Had like a killer fucking screenwriting career, and you look at this guy, he dies at 50,

he's like credited on all these like big Amblin-y movies or sequels or whatever. And you're like, oh, this guy must have been like a Shane Black, Joe Estherhouse, like died in a mountain of cocaine, was like doing high paid script punch up. Isn't that the answer? No. No, okay, okay. He had like a bizarre like heart illness. He died young after a protracted battle.

And then you read about him for being this guy who they like brought into fixed scripts and got paid so much. It has all these huge credits. He sounds a lot closer to John Hughes where it was like, didn't like the industry was a real family man, just had really good story math instincts and all these things where they'd bring him a script that was like, this has been development for 10 years the premise is great but yet no one can crack it we keep attaching talent but we lose them and he would just be like here's the problem right here and just immediately solve it like the

emotions of it and you can read his Wikipedia is really thorough and actually very well written and goes through like project by project and what his takes on each project very few he originated. And it was one of his things where he was like, Henry Jones Sr. has to come through at the halfway point. Stuff like that where he would just immediately go, that's the movie. And it's just kind of a tragic loss.

The thing about his screenplay just to note is that according to Spielberg, Tom Stafford wrote every single line of dialogue in this film. That I believe that. Which was sort of like at that point, Stafford had written Empire of the Sun for him. Like Stafford is right.

So like all those great lines we were talking about, I think a lot of that is coming from Tom Stafford. Anyway, Spielberg I think recognizes after Temple of Doom, oh, Denham Elliott should be in this movie. John Rhys Davis should be in this movie. I don't know why I didn't have his friends from the Raiders of the Lost Ark that everyone liked not being the second movie. You're talking about being surprised at how late Connery comes in.

I was surprised where I was like, in my memory, the whole second half of the movie is like the four of them as a wrecking crew. To me, it was much closer to the River Phoenix prologue, and then we're pretty quickly into this father story. Oh no, that's all after Venice and the church and all this stuff. And because it ends with like, oh, the four of them riding off into the sunset, iconically,

I'm like, all four of them are together for the whole second half, right? And it's like, no, Denim and like, Jomri Stavies are kind of off at their own thing. They only really all converge at the very end. But it is so nice to have both of them in there. And Spielberg's just so clearly aware of like, these guys fucking rule.

The audience loves these characters. Let's give them more fun. And which I think is a wise decision. Alison Doody, who plays Elsa. Which let's say is funny to say, funny to hear. An Irish actress. Not to be disrespectful. Her name is Alison Doody. Her name is Alison Doody.

Her name is Alison Doody. No, you know, getting around. I can't, as someone whose last name spells get hard, I cannot participate in a last name. Fair enough. I'm not being mean. No, you're not, it is. She made her debut as a sort of like,

small character in A View to a Kill, the Bond movie. Yes. Which when we did that Patreon series, I was like, who the fuck is that? Started doing like wolf whistles and then I was like, oh, it's Alison. And so I guess she's kind of getting cast off of that sort of interest. She is kind of plucked out of relative obscurity and doesn't really have with Spielberg at the time. Career. He was like, I want a Grace Kelly.

I found this woman. She looks like Grace Kelly. She does have the look like Gath was like, I want a Grace Kelly. I found this woman, she looks like Grace Kelly. She does have the look like Geth was saying, like to a T, you know, she'd- But also this character's gonna be a mystery. You know, it's like, right. It is, again, we'll get there, but she is obviously an extraordinarily attractive human being and is playing an object of affection

for multiple characters in this movie. But a costumer made a choice to say, she shall be at her most smoking hot while in full Nazi regalia. River Phoenix obviously

brought to Spielberg by Harrison Ford. Julian Glover obviously had been in The Empire Strikes Back, right? Yes, yeah. We had him do... I think he'd interviewed for other parts in Indiana Jones movies before. He was very on their radar.

We had him on George Lucas' talk show. A thing that I've told you and you went like, that's kind of depressing for him. You had Donovan? You had Colonel Viers? Correct. And the weirdest thing. He plays Colonel Viers, right?

Yes. Yes, correct. Yes. He's the guy in the AT-AT who's like... Your favorite character. No, my favorite, no. No, Piet's your favorite. No, it's Admiral Piet.

I'm sorry. Admiral Piet is way, I mean... They are companion characters. Yeah, but Admiral Piet... Your favorite thing in Star Wars is that sidebar of Empire of the sort of weird... Empire 2 Jedi. He's in both. Yes.

The fact that he's just the guy who someone gets killed next to him and then it's like you're in charge and he's like... Fuck, that's crazy. David wrote a very good piece of the Atlantic about that. Yeah, the Ballad of Admiral P.I. One of my best pieces. And then he makes it all the way to the end of Jedi. Like he keeps dodging Vader strangling him, even though he fucked up himself.

He's in the corporate machine, climbing the corporate ladder, trying to stay out of the way, which is a very relatable thing to anyone who has ever worked in... He's the only Star Wars Empire care... Empire, I mean, member of the Empire, that they bother to give any arc. Everyone else tends to just kind of die. David, I guess I just don't understand your obsession

with bringing up Star Wars every time you... Fuck them up Admiral Piet so much. Speaking of favorite Star Wars characters though, this movie has a Kit Fisto, everybody. Who is? Kazim. Kazim is your Fisto. Kazim is the Fisto of this movie.

I thought you were gonna say that Grail Knight is your Fisto, but we get... Whoa, there's so much... The Grail Knight is cool. The Grail Knight is your fist over. Oh, we get- Whoa, there's so much- Will, the Grail Knight is cool! The Grail Knight's maybe the saddest character in the history. But I'm like, the Grail Knight is very melancholy. We need to save this, but when I threw the list to Geth and was like, we're doing Spielberg, what do you want? You responded with a Grail Knight specific.

There's so much to say. A statement that might sound hyperbolic, but that I kind of agree with you. What did I say? I'll remind you, but it was your whole reason for wanting to do this movie. You didn't tell me this stuff with your dad. This being such a pivotal experience. You focused on the Grille Knight and you had it taken. I said, you have to do that episode.

It's... I have so much to say about the Grille Knight, but what... Maybe Kazim is like the sassy tin. Kazim is the guy, he's the Kid Fisto though, where he shows up, doesn't get much screen time. You're kind of like, I want to see... This guy has some... Where I'm like, I would want... Whatever this fucking the Kid Fisto though, where he shows up, doesn't get much screen time. You're kind of like, I want to see, this guy has some- Where I'm like, I would want, whatever this fucking brotherhood of the cruciform sword bullshit is, give me a Disney Plus preview.

Give me an Andor for the cruciform sword crew? I think I can say this. Who's Kazim? He has fucked shit up in his life. He will do so again, and now he's gone. That's Kid Fisto. Years ago, auditioned for what they had said was Untitled Star Wars Project,

and when I read the sides, I was like, this is clearly a young Indiana Jones show. Uh-huh, uh-huh. And it was gonna be animated. And then I think as like Dial of Destiny was kinda getting complicated, they were like, let's just focus on this and not do the sideshow. But there was going to be a Disney Plus animated sort of like

River Phoenix-esque rather than Young Indiana Jones-esque. And after X-Men 97, I think they could pull it off. X-Men 97, some of the best television writing last year. But there's nothing like X-Men 97 where it's like, people are not only nostalgic for that sort of old throwback X-Men, they're nostalgic for the 90s cartoon aesthetics, the 90s cartoon plotting. Like, it's like, it's not just that X-Men 97 is like, oh, let's sort of like do a new X-Men.

It's like, no, no, we're picking up the thread of that show. We're weirdly bowing it again. It's weirdly bold to go, it's not a new show. Yeah, it's like sort of season six. Lord just bringing his best. Yeah, like. And also we're just like picking good comic storylines that weren't adapted.

Also everyone who likes this has aged by 25 to 30 years, so like we'll do some stuff you can handle 25 to 30 years. Yeah, it'll be more mature. We'll stage it up and up. It was a wild swing. It was good. The thing that was very funny about the Indiana Jones cartoon thing was usually, you know,

you'll get these breakdowns and it'll be like, Untitled Lucasfilm Project and you read it and you're like, this is Star Wars, but they're trying to hide that it's Star Wars. Yes. They call it Space Bears, famously. Right. This they sent out as Untitled Star Wars Cartoon Show. And I was like, oh cool, I'm auditioning for a Star Wars cartoon show. And then I read the sides and they gave all the characters alien names,

but they talked about being at a university and studying adventurers and wanting to collect relics. And I was like, you're using Star Wars as a cover for it being Indiana Jones. And you've named all the characters like, blerk, blerk. But I was like, I think I'm reading for either young Sala or young Brody. It was one or the other. Your young your waddo experience could make you a fantastic animated Sala. I think so. But this show has just not happened. David, what's episodes brought to you by movie? Once again, here we are in March 2025 and we are so happy that MUBI continues

to sponsor the show. They are a curated streaming service dedicated to elevating great cinema from around the globe, from iconic directors to emerging auteurs. There's always something new to discover with MUBI. Each and every film is hand selected so you can explore the best of cinema,

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You can try movie free for 30 days. That's mubi.com Blank check for a month of great cinema for free movie David, do you mind if I try out some new impressions on you? I've been working on some impressions for my Mad TV audition. I think they're going to bring it back again. Okay, ready? Here's my first impression. What's that?

That's me shopping for glasses in the past. Used to be so bad. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr way now. And describe my face. What am I doing? You're happy smiling. I'm grinning because I'm shopping at Warby Parker. And what happened? Warby Parker changed all that. See this is the impression. Grumpy guy and Warby Parker changed all that into this. Yeah so Warby Parker, the glasses store. They use nothing but premium materials in every frame. Warby Parker designs every frame in-house. Their collection includes silhouettes, colors, and fits made to suit every face. This is true. I exclusively wear Warby Parker glasses.

Made the jump probably 10 years ago. Glasses shopping used to be a thing that drove me crazy. And Warby has great options. They refresh constantly, but it's also they are more affordable. They cut out the middleman, they're high quality, but you don't feel the same kind of pressure. I was used to feel picking glasses going,

oh my God, I'm gonna have to stick to these for a decade. They're durable. But it's not just glasses. Yeah, cause I don't wear eyeglasses, but I wear sunglasses. Exactly. Well, and I do have some great, a couple of great pairs of Warby sunglasses,

and I'm busting out now that the weather's good again. They, look, I will say, you go to any of their physical locations, they have incredible employees who are so good at genuinely just looking at your face and going, you know what would work? They understand the sort of, the geometrics of the glasses and the human skull, and you can get wide fit, wide bridged, boxier, you know, whatever your type is. They provide eye exams. Many Warby Parker locations offer comprehensive eye exams starting at $85 and Warby Parker has over 250 retail locations across the US and Canada where you can get styled by one of their friendly expert advisors.

Look, you can get started with Warby Parker's virtual try on. You can try on glasses and sunglasses, seeing the realistic color, texture, and size of each style right from home right now. I currently am rocking the Durand. That's been my frame of choice for the last couple of years, but here's the thing I like. In the past, they've offered both the Griffin

and the Newman. Oh, that's fun. Isn't that fun? And the Durand, of course, is named after character character actor Kevin Durant. You know what David, every time I look at the glasses I think that guy's great. He's incredible. Well I gotta tell you Griff, and I've said it before, glasses really compliment your face. Hey thank you very much. It's that Warby Parker magic. And if you're not close to a location you can do the virtual try-on at home. They can send you a couple pairs, no risk, no cost, see how they look on you, send it

back at the one you want. You can try on glasses and sunglasses, seeing the realistic color, texture, and size of each style right from home right now. Or head over to warbyparker.com slash check right now to take the home try-on quiz and pick five pairs of frames to try it at home for free. Yeah, that's warbyparker.com slash check warbyparker.com slash check. I'm going to push back on Kazim being the Fisto, and I'm going to say this, I'm going to explain my reasoning behind this, not that he's not your Fisto,

but in terms of his function in relation to the movie and it's what I like about Kazim. Okay. Okay. Is that like, you're saying always mysterious, I'd love to watch a whole series about him. He's like, he goes a little deeper than this character does in the other Indiana Jones films, the characters that occupy

this kind of role, right? We joked about in the other episodes that like, outside of your main like intellectual rival in the Indiana Jones movies, most of the iconic Indiana Jones films don't have names. It's like German mechanic and monkey man and like thuggy guard, right? Guy who swings things around until he gets shot. Tyros swordsman. I mean, truly like, the merch doesn't even name them, which Lucas loves doing.

They all are just the description of who they are and you get nothing more, right? And even if you're spending a whole sequence with the fucking guy and there's a sense of character, you're like, this guy is defined by his, what he wears or what his job is or what he holds. And that is his whole fucking prism. The fact that Kazim, like, introduces himself and starts to explain himself a little already makes him a little less mysterious.

And you're just like, oh, I'm not used to, like, Indiana Jones, like, side goons being fleshed out to this degree. And I similarly think it's a nice surprise when he pops back up again. Where you're like- So blatantly facing away from camera until he- But you're like, I was ready to never see Kazim again.

I think the Fisto thing is that like- See, we have a, I think a fundamental misunderstanding of what the Fisto is as a film archetype, which I think everyone would agree that is a film archetype. It is. It is. Let's unpack this quickly. But I just think the idea of, like, who's that person? They're visually intriguing. Their...

Kazim looks great. Looks great. And also... Both Kazim and Fisto, those parts were written small, but I would argue that the actors squeezed more ju— The actors squeezed more juice out of that than ever was intended by the screenwriter, director— It's a fucking Juicero machine performance. Dude, the Fisto is the juicer of the movie. Who squeezed more juice than you ever thought?

And Kazim squeezed so much more juice and intrigued the audience to a degree where much like Fisto in the prequel trilogies, you can't help but walk away and go, there are parts of the plot I don't remember. And I've been looking forward for decades to learn the plot of this. But what I do remember is that that green guy with those tendrils was fucking cool.

Kit Fisto except for this is his reaction to Palpatine, you know, attacking with a lightsaber. Yeah, I mean. It's just the worst part of the movie. I would argue that. I would argue. A pretty deep impression of Kit Fisto. Kazim's death in this, I would say,

maybe equally overwhelming compared to his punching above his weight and earning a little bit more in the audience's mind. Odead Fair in The Mummy... Yes. ...is kind of a plused-up version of this character that I like. He's Kazim as, like, co-lead. And he's, like, in the whole movie, where it's like, right,

they're going to the mummy's tomb and a guy shows up and he's like, my entire life job is making sure nobody fucking goes to the mummy's tomb. Both, I know how scary it is and it it's this sort of like holy thing for me. You're right though, it's one of the smart things the mummy does is it makes Kazim the Sallah. Have that character basically join the team. It makes Kazim the Sallah. And then he can show up, sure.

I'm gonna say it one more time. Okay. It kinda makes Kazim the Sallah. Can I also put another thing out here that I never thought I'd have an opportunity to say, and this did just occur to me, this was not pre-planned. As we establish the archetype of the Fisto, the reason that the movie The Warriors is such a cult classic

that has stood the test of time, even with the director's cuts trying to make it worse, is it's a movie comprised almost entirely of Fistos. I think it is fair to say that movie is an oops-all Fistos. That movie is, even half Fisto's that movie is Even half the main characters are Fisto's something went wrong at the cabin crunch factory And now the whole movie is made out of this that entire gathering that happens like It's yeah, exactly exactly

This is my dream Can you dig it? So, the Grail Knights. The Grail Knights. No, no, no, we're not getting to Grail Knights. We're not getting to Grail Knights. The city is yours. Is that in the end of the movie? The city is yours if you Fistos can count.

I will say, just- Fistos, come out and play. To return to the dossier. This film was shot. You don't wanna go down to Combo Warriors, Kid Fisto, Rapid Hole, and your Indiana Jones in the Last Crusade episode. This film was shot in 63 days,

which is fairly impressive, given the scale. The vibe from the set is literally basically everyone's just like, we had a great time, everyone got along, and it went really well. Like, there is no drama emerging from Last Crusade. Ford and Connery are like, we fucking clicked right away, we both liked what we were doing. Can I put forward an analog? Spielberg's obviously at the absolute peak, I think, at this point of like,

give this man an action sequence, and he will run it like a machine. Can I put forth a movie analog? Yes. Ocean's 13 and Last Crusade, I think, are similar. Yes, I mean, Last Crusade's better than Ocean's 13, I do like Ocean's 13 a lot. No, I think Last Crusade I think are similar. Yes, I mean Last Crusade's better than Ocean's 13. I do like Ocean's 13 a lot. No, I think Last Crusade's a much better version of this, but like we tried something different with the second one and people were less into it. We're sorry we're gonna give you the

exact Indiana Jones sequel we think you want, you know? And I think there is that like freedom especially because he's coming off of some grown-up movies where he's like it'd be fun to play with toys again. And he makes Schindler's List so shortly after this, things like making the Nazi woman hot. The merchandising line from Schindler's List notoriously bombed. I will say Spielberg insisted on the-

I did get you to giggle. It's the last time he's able to kind of have this sort of fun successfully. That's what I don't like about this movie. Is if some of it feels a little right. Uh, I don't know. Punching below his... Yeah, it's below his.

Can I say one other thing too? If in the movie, The Warriors, you replaced every time they said the word boppers with the word fistos, everything about that movie not only still works, but gets better. I'll move on. David's holding up a no better. I'll move on, I'll move on. David's holding up a noose. I'll move on, I'll move on. I don't care about this. No, my point about Last Crusade, Spielberg insists

or has the idea of including a moment that I really think is interesting in Last Crusade, which is when you see when they're in Berlin, like books being burned, which is this moment of like, un-Levity, right? Like, where you're like, Jesus fucking Christ. Almost every other moment, the Nazis in this movie are cartoon nobodies, right?

Who are literally just like bowling pins for Indy to knock down and shit. And weirdly old crusty guys, too. He makes them, like, feeble and old and gross. They are really toothless in this movie in a way that's interesting compared to even Raiders, where they're quite sinister and, like, you know, good villains. And certainly given that he's beginning to think about things like Schindler's List. This is 89, Schindler's List is 93.

I don't have a problem with it. It's not like I'm like, oh, this movie is, you know, offensive, like, you know, with its cartoon Nazis. I'm just kind of like, it does feel like Spielberg has run out of things to do with that sort of stuff. Like, it's like a little paint by numbers. You don't think it's intentional? That they're so silly?

I mean, this movie is silly. This movie has a very good tone to it that it doesn't deviate from. Even the book burning scene, though, I'm like, it has this, it puts a pit in your stomach, and it has since I was a kid. It does. And they're marching. It's one of the only moments that really does that. But then it goes on so long that you do start to realize,

like, even with all this, they're just marching in a fucking circle, sniffing their own farts. Right, there is like a... You don't think there's any part of Spielberg that's like, fuck these Nazis. I think there is. I just... They're toothless and our two main heroes... ...sleep with one of them.

I think... You know, like, like who have we talked? I think the Nazis are scarier and Raiders. I think I think weirdly I agree with you that they're sort of like a more pointed kind of like These clowns. Yeah In a way as much as he makes them goofier in this movie has so much more of a like cartoon tone He it does feel like he's attacking them in personality and like culturally a lot more I even think the like Hitler signing the grail diary thing An insane moment is like a moment of just like right this guy's just like a fucking narcissist

right like all of this just came out of this guy with like a complex who like Literally when handed the thing he's hired goons to find for him still just thinks that some right? I just I'm like a contextual note. I this movie I did realize I'm like, oh these guys who are actors who go to school for it who train who work really hard who get to it and a level where they can be in major motion pictures, and then they happen to look enough like Hitler to credibly play Hitler.

Well, you never wanted a phone call. You get stuck. You know what I mean? I'm like, damn, man, that's a typecasting that's real weird. We talked about in other recent episodes, like the world of people who are that for Lincoln, and that's a much better

Silo to be in there's Hitler got you know, there's a war the decks of hip Casting off like you'll book shit, but you got to keep putting on that little fucking mustache But I just want to I just want to tell you guys something. It seems you do not know Do you know who plays Hitler in this movie? I always forget it's Michael Sheard is the name of the actor But do you know another role that he played? He plays Ozzel, Admiral Ozzel. Ah, yes. The Empire Strikes Back.

Again, David, you're really pushing the Star Wars thing hard. Who is the guy who comes out of Lightspeed too fast, fucks up, gets killed so that Admiral Piaf gets to be the next... Do you think you need to tell me who Admiral Ozzel is? I'm just saying, I don't think that guy played Hitler again. I have not always been respectful on this show. I've not always been the most respectful guest. That's one of the most disrespectful things

anyone's ever done to me. Chris, let me just remind you that our show is being listened to by people who may not immediately know who fucking Admiral Ozzel is. Speaking of Star Wars admirals, I recently did text Bobby Moynihan, and I'm not someone who smokes weed at all.

I just texted Bobby the other day, what if Admiral Ackbar wasn't an actor? What if that was a real guy? What if you were like, I'll mine at Trader Joe's and the guy's checking out in front of you and you could be like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, big fan. I don't know if I can repeat it, but Bobby Moynihan's Ackbar baby used to do at the UCB. Oh, no, no, no. No, I can't say it, but it wasnihan's Akbar baby used to do with the UCP. No, no, no. I can't say it, but it was incredibly good. Can I close two loops on two things here?

David. I shuttered. Things that Varkogen set up. So Julian Sands was on George Lucas talk show, right? It was- Julian Sant- No. No, I'm sorry. Julian Glover.

I'm sorry. When I told you that, you were like, that's depressing for him. Yes. That he had to be interviewed by you guys. And I think it was in London, we were doing an all day stream of people who have been in movies with Harrison Ford and using that as the thread.

So we talked to him about both Star Wars and Indiana Jones. He said that Donovan is easily his favorite role he's ever played in his career. He's really, really good. And for a guy who's classically trained, I expect him to sort of be like, well, those are fun, silly movies I did for money, and they're like serious roles I prefer.

And he was like, no, it was so great to be the main baddie in an Indiana Jones movie. And the turn, he has fun with the turn. Look, he's really good. I think he's a great villain. He's probably... It's weird, he is the main villain. He is. And at the same time, it's like... You have Vogel and you have Elsa. And Alison, dude, he's kind, he is the main villain. He is. And at the same time it's like.

You have Vogel and you have Elsa. And Elsa, dude, he's kind of more like the, right, the active villain in a way. But he's really good and the turn is really clever with him, I think, yeah. Now, to this point of what we were saying about this movie's like take on the Nazis, I think this character is sort of like a heightening

of fucking Belloc, right? Where it's like, this guy has like a lot less swag than Belloc. He's a lot less cool. He's just kind of a dork. In a certain way, he's like a rich dork hobbyist. That's the thing. He's like all these jerks we have to deal with now. He is. It's very weird.

Where I'm like, you don't even have an ideology. Probably you became a Nazi because you want the Holy Grail. Because it's like the best thing. He literally says I just want to live forever and we're living in an era where some of these billionaires are trying to figure out how to live for 300 years. Bellac is sort of just like I don't you know when Indiana Jones is like you're working with Nazis he's just sort of like I don't think about things that right right like Donovan is like coming up with moral justifications. I joined the club so that I can get the Holy Grail. Right, and then has this terrifying line of like, I'll be living forever long after the Nazi party is dead. Like it doesn't matter what I did to support them,

but you also have him set up in the movie. The way the film introduces him, it feels like he is the guy who sends Indiana Jones on the mission, not the guy who's going to be his rival the whole time. And you're like, he fits into that role of just being the guy who sends Indiana Jones on the mission not the guy who's gonna be his rival the whole time. And you're like he fits into that role of just being the guy who like introduces the MacGuffin. Of course he's a little too slay. But I'm like I think there's something fun to this character being like these guys are not cool at all and people who do this are like morally bankrupt and like uninteresting. Can I just, just before we move on totally from what I thought, I just gotta give props. Admiral Ossil and Hitler, that's a hell of an IMDb.

I was gonna say, that's what I was saying about the guy. You put that on the tombstone. I was Admiral Ossil and Hitler. I don't think that's an actor who did a lot of Hitler. He had a broad British whatever career or whatever. This was the other thing that's, this was the other thing. And then he just like adds Hitler in there I guess.

That Glover said was just like Spielberg was really loyal. I'm sorry, Lucas was really loyal to those guys. His British character actor guys. And that he was saying like, Stephen, we're hiring Glover. You know, like my guys we've had in London have just been fucking cooking. I love the idea that George Lucas calls that guy up. He's like, I got your back. I'm going to get you back in.

It's going to be a blockbuster. You're going to make residuals. And you're playing a really well-known character. Yo, yeah. So you're gonna be Adolf Hitler! Clearly I must have some meaty monologues, like it's kind of a non-speech thing. What's the other loop?

It's an under five. It's an under five. What's the other loop you wanted to close? I'm trying to remember, I'll come back. Okay, forget it. Don't forget, I'll remember. Not, well, let's not jump to the end. The whole thing with Last Crusade is like,

as much as it has lots of fun stuff, I do feel like 80% of what everyone wants to talk about is just the grail scene because it's such a little, short story of a scene, right? And it's so weird. And also, the minute you start to overthink it, you're like, I'm sorry, Elsa's just like, uh, this one. And he's like, yeah, I believe you.

Oh, aren't you supposed to be rich and smart? His hair grows all long though. It rocks. We'll get to it. I remember the other thing. More relevant in two earlier episodes, but makes sense within the context of what we're talking about here. I forgot to mention these two. 1941, have you ever seen it, Geth?

I have not blanked out. The Spielberg film. Yeah, that's right. Spielberg's first attempt at like, making Nazis villains in a kind of like popcorn movie that isn't gonna take it seriously, right? Wow, they're barely, it's only Christopher Lee. That film is more about the Japanese,

but Christopher Lee plays a Nazi officer who's working with the Japanese. And it just like doesn't work. And Christopher Lee obviously like one of the greatest of all time. I mean, he's doing his best. And he's introduced speaking German and you're just like, I can't wait to hate Christopher Lee as a comedy Nazi. And it doesn't connect.

Spielberg wrote and shot and cut Christopher Lee in 1941 doing the exact tote coat hanger bit. He was like, here's a really funny idea. You have a twisted Nazi character. He takes out a device, you think he's gonna torture the guy. There's this whole interrogation subplot in that movie.

And then it turns out just a coat hanger and this guy cares about his fancy clothes more. And he was like, I thought it was so funny. I put it in the movie, it fell fucking flat. It was silence. It was dead and I couldn't get over it. And I was like, I thought it was so funny. I put in the movie, it fell fucking flat. It was silence. It was dead and I couldn't get over it. And I was like, I have to make this joke work in something. And then I was like, Raiders, we built this character tot.

It would work for him. Right. And it was like, it fucking played like gangbusters. I wasn't going to throw that out. That speaks to his like growth in learning how to calibrate. How can you do Nazis in a movie where you're not dealing with the full weight and severity of what they did, but you're also not completely turning them into like silly bullshit, right? Which 1941, that's a larger problem with that

movie. It does not deal with serious issues in a funny way. Raiders does it in a more scary way, but Pulpy, this movie I think has the right version of like comedy Nazis because it does take more pot shots at their expense. There's also just something I do think there's something to note about. There's a documentary I believe called The Last Laugh all about how Jewish comedians We've called The Last Laugh all about how Jewish comedians deal with Holocaust jokes. And seeing someone of Spielberg's generation come about as a very prominent Jewish director and see him sort out how to portray Nazis throughout the course of his career, there's just something obvious to be said about culturally it's fascinating. And like there's no real way to get it right.

And to see him, like that does represent on some level, healing for- I think Julie Glover is fun. I think Alison Dutty is fun. I don't think, like, just my big note for this movie, it's not even a big note, I don't care. I like this movie, I think it's fun. I think it's a good movie.

It's just, I don't, there's nothing scary about the villainy in it, really. So there's just a lot of stakes. But the whole second half, it's like, no, but the major conflict becomes him figuring out shit with his dad. That conflict, that stuff is fine. That sort of supplants the who's the bad guy

he needs to out with. But to me, that is then completely resolved after the tank goes off the cliff. Like after that, they are settled. I think part of it, David, that I do- And then we just do the grail, which is fun, but at that point, the Nazis, I'm not scared of them at all. Well, one thing that really stands out to it, David, that I do. And then we just do the grail, which is fun. But at that point, they, the Nazis, I'm not scared of them at all.

Well, one thing that really stands out to me, though, is just a big show don't tell note of, they basically say, hey, if the Nazis get the holy grail, they kind of indicate, now they'll be able to have these Nazi super soldiers that can't die. Yeah, but they won't. Where you're just like, that's, as of you,

I'm never buying that, that's gonna happen. No, that's the thing. Where you're just like, as of you, I'm never buying that that's gonna happen. No, that's the thing. With Raiders, that's the other thing. With Raiders, there's this kind of, there is this more gripping, like, we both, someone's gonna get to this weird thing first, and Lord knows what's in it, but, like, the Nazis have designs on its power.

With the Holy Grail, right, there's this sort of like, wow, what if someone got the Holy Grail? And I'm like, what if someone got, what do you mean that he lives forever? Like, okay, one guy, like, I mean, he's gonna have like your whole army come drink from the Holy Grail at this point. And then of course they get there and it's like,

yeah, you can live forever if you stay right the fuck here in this place and you cannot leave. Can't cross the seal. Yeah, you can't cross the seal. But like that's the, the Grail myth is always that. Let me know when it's time to start talking about that scene. I can't cross the seal. Yeah, you can't cross the seal. But like, that's the Grail myth is always that. Let me know when it's time to start talking about that scene. I don't want to step on toes. The Grail myth is, you know, in Arthurian legend,

all the way to this. It's always right. It's like, oh, well, that would be great. And then you get there and you're like, I guess I didn't think hard about why this would be great, because it's not great. Like, this wasn't worth it. And the journey is the destination. Yeah, the destination is the journey and all that.

It ties back into the Nazi thing, though, because how much of it, there's also something fascinating too to watch of like, hey, prominent Jewish filmmaker dealing with Nazis, also in a movie that presupposes that Christian mythology is happening, that there is a holy grail that has magical powers. Well, and, right, the original Raiders is Old Testament. It is far more rabbinical in, like, the nature... Raiders is Jewish. Temple is Hindu. This is Christian. There's, like, a thing... Choices are made.

And then Temple of Crystal Skull kind of abandons that. This is the thing that people always point out of, like, the disconnect between the original trilogy and the two later old man indie movies more than anything, is, like, the first three are all about, like, I don't believe in religion. It's, like, the supernatural, but through specifically the prism of religious myth.

I believe in these artifacts that people cared about and hid away, and, like, there's, you know, runic languages, but I don't actually think that the Holy Grail is gonna keep me alive. And every fucking time it's like, oh, it turns out it keeps you alive. But you're coasting off of specific religious stories that versus the latter two are like,

there's a thing he may or may not believe in, but it's a lot fudgier of a time travel device or aliens. This movie is like, it benefits from being like, yeah, fucking Arthurian legend, that's so baked in. But it does almost feel like it gets to the end and even Spielberg himself is kind of like And like I guess you drink from the holy grail like it feels like a guy who has no No, this movie is So goofy and I think it works, but it is like on paper. You're just like this is this

Phoenix Phoenix stuff, which feels like Spielberg Dustin off the cobwebs and being like you want fun Spielberg. Here's fun Spielberg They're on top of a fucking circus train All the way back to you know, the greatest show on Earth, the big circus train sequence and that, or the first cinematic sequence that impacted him. But he's also just loading, like, everything up. He's like, I'm gonna give you all the fun.

They're on top of a moving train that has animals inside of it. If you ask me, like, what's the big set piece, chase, transportation-y thing in The S. Crusade, in my mind, as a fan since I'm nine, I go, oh, the Tank one. And then you rewatch it, you're like, they got a train? Motorcycle? Motorcycle, sidecar, they got a blimp. Plane?

Blimp, blimp, blimp. Blimp, blimp. They got a blimp. There's a whole blimpy plot. Then the planes. This movie is arguably about transportation. You're locking David back in, he's leaning in. I hear what you're saying.

Transportation infrastructure, it's a love letter to the history of transportation. And camels, and he doesn't like camels. I mean, there is a running theme though of like- Nature's vehicle. Hey, rats come and help you, horses come and help you. Do the rats help? I guess they sort of help.

Well, the rats give them the heads up that the fire is on though, right? The running rats is where they're like, shit, something's wrong. The running rats is where they shit something. The rats are pointedly not Nazi cooperators. It is also like, hey, the Nazis have all this tech, but animals like Indy and the Joe. Yeah, he's a more...

Well, and just like, Indy uses a gun. He will use a gun, but it's not really his primary thing. So inelegant. It's like a blaster. Yeah, random and elegant. He likes to whip or lightsaber. No, but it's like, because I'm now playing the Indiana Jones video game, which has been very...

I've been meaning to ask. ...which is really, really good. Yeah. And in that game, you don't have a gun initially. You know, you can get one. It's not like, again, but it's sort of like, right, you're like, no, Indy has like a whip and he like picks shit up and, you know, improvises, right? Like he'll have a shovel or like a statue or something.

That's what we like about him. He's on the back of his heels. Right. And, you know, he just needs his whip, his fedora. I mean, is it a little cute that in the River Phoenix sequence it ends with like the sort of Indiana Jones type guy being like, all right, take my hat. You lost today, kid. You know. I mean, you have to like it.

Is that the quote? Yeah. That one always stuck with me, man. Is that a little too cute? Am I just kind of sick of that stuff because now it's the backbone of all these like a sequel. I mean, you get joy though. No, I enjoy this movie.

You don't get joy going, oh, but they explain the hack. It makes you think a little bit, I mean, about like, I always wanted to know where he got his jacket. No, no, I will agree with you that it is the only moment in the sequence that butts up against being a step too cute for me, where I'm like, the guy doesn't have to hand him the hat. I can be like, and then later he bought a hat because he thought it looked cool on that guy. But Spielberg likes to put a period on things.

But I also like that that sequence ends with like, here's this thrilling adventure and he's starting to develop his love for this whole way of life. And finding a different way to express his love and respect for history in these objects than his father who's more purely academic. Although it's also funny to realize too, and I'm sure this is something that I have a blind spot to. I occasionally don't realize there's already internet dialogues about things,

but he's a really terrible archeologist. Have we discussed this? This was part of your text. He's really, really, really bad at being an archeologist. What's your problem with that? The Cross of Coronado ends with a ship exploding. Like he goes to, he realizes, hey, we gotta go through this library

to get down to this crypt. And he just takes a fucking metal thing and starts pounding. He do smash. Everything he ever touches in an archeological sense is lost to time immediately because he explodes it in a ball of fire. Over and over and over.

There's also a couple times when he's kind of just like, oh, I found this ancient or whatever, you know, he's like blowing on something. And I'm like, aren't you supposed to kind of treat these things with care? Everything, everything is destroyed. But you know what? It's the 30s. Maybe a lot of this refined like, oh, no, no, no, put on your gloves, get your little brush out.

Maybe that came later. I just feel like everyone in the academic field, when they see Henry Jones Jr.'s name get attached to a case file, must just be like, ah, we're fucked. Everything we do will crumble to goddamn dust before we can even take a photograph of it, because this asshole has to smash everything

and make it explode. Your text, when you put forth your choice of Last Crusade, my favorite thing about Last Crusade is that Indiana Jones is the worst archaeologist of all time. The Venice crypt scene is, we located one of the brothers, the first crusader night, but before anyone else knows about it, we climb out of the sewage system and it's gone forever. Your follow-up text, within seconds of of the sewage system and it's gone forever. Your follow-up text, within seconds of finding the actual tombs and graves of real Templar knights,

they are engulfed in fire bombs. He makes a rubbing, he gets what he needs. He gets what he needs and then it explodes. Everything he finds is immediately destroyed and it's so funny to watch the movie with that in mind. Yeah, he's bad at archeology. Really bad. Well, it's because he has Steven Spielberg, like, crafting inventive action sequences around him.

Okay? He'd love to probably just be chill. I just don't believe he'd ever get to a professor level at a university behaving this way in the field of archaeology. People are massing in his office, waiting for office hours with Indiana Earles. I find that to be one of the biggest logical reaches of this entire film. It is funny that it's like, okay, we have the opening sequence and then we tie, you

know, we jump forward in time and we sort of... I just want to close the loop on that. I just want to say I like that that sequence, it's like he rushes home, he's got it, he thinks his dad's gonna love it, right? Connery, we don't even show an actor playing young Connery, you hear the voice, he's dismissive. And then it's like, cops show up. Cops are in bed with these people. They make them give it back. We have six witnesses and he sees this fucking fat cat

out the window and it's like, system is rigged. Like he's in a microcosm. He's got this excitement of feeling like I've done it, I've won and I'm gonna have my dad's respect. And it's like, your dad doesn't give a shit and this fucking lifestyle is gonna be a grind. It's gonna be uphill battle the rest of your life against these fucking dudes with the nice suits and the money.

And then I just like that are hard cuts, hard cuts to him on the ship in the rain. And he's still trying to get this one object from this one guy. It's what makes it feel not disconnected as a mini movie is it's like, oh, the reason we're seeing this now is because this is about how much Indiana Jones can't get over shit. But you know, in archeology, if you go to a museum to display something, they're gonna say like, okay, so where did you find it?

And he's gonna look him in the eye and go, what? I murdered the entire crew of shit. That's the thing. I murdered everyone on the ship. He didn't mean to, he just meant to get the cross, but their ship was exposed. But archeology-wise, this is bad form in the field of archeology.

I do just- I murdered a bunch of people and now I have this cross. I do just like that Indy has this basically unseen adventure that we just see the final minutes of on the boat, him getting the cross back, right? He goes back and he is finally like, I'm gonna fucking teach my class. I'm gonna do my office hours, right?

Like I'm not no more like pending ventures, tied that thing off. Closed loop. I'm gonna have these horny girls throw themselves in the thing. Yeah, take a number. I'll see every single person. It's fine. You know, hey, Denim Elliott, how you doing?

High five, like, you know, and gets a weird package, right? And he's like, eh, weird package, but you know what? No, he's at least, it doesn't feel forced to me that Indy is trying to be a college professor for a second. He's so bad at it that there would be, he would honestly probably be, his name and photo would be circulated in college archeology departments worldwide of do not hire this lunatic.

His rate, my professor's score would be in the hot sewer. He's fantastic at locating artifacts, unfortunately instantly destroys them every single time. I agree with you that he thinks... He's bad at it. I can hang up the fucking hat and teach full-time, and I'm good, and I close the last, like, big narrative arc in my life, which was getting that fucking cross, and now I'm here.

If he hadn't gotten the delivery from Donovan, he would have in two weeks started going crazy and being like, give me that fucking whip back. But he's convincing himself he's ready to, like, move on. And much like he couldn't fucking move on until he closes the loop on the cross thing, getting the grail diary and being like, fuck, that's my dad's shit. He goes to see Walter Donovan, Walter Ronan's like,

grail, grail, grail. He's like, right, that's my dad's obsession. Call him. I did call him. He's missing. Okay. There's missing. Okay. There's this, he doesn't really want to do this. It's a little bit more the obligation of like, well, if my fucking dad is missing, right? I guess I have to put the effort in. And I think it's almost less about saving his dad

than it is about impressing his dad. Like he's like, if I show up, he's going to be like good shit kid. So, right. The next sequence is Venice, is the catacombs and the introduction of Elsa. Great sequence. Dr. Schneider. Kazim.

Kazim is there. Yes, that's true. Great sequence. The rats are the special effect that no one would ever bother with anymore. Yep. Like that would be CGI now. Spielberg gets 2 gets 2000 fucking wet rats and makes everyone like deal with them.

It looks amazing. Wait, say more. 2000 wet rats. Now has anyone ever attempted that at New York Fashion Week, Ben? Not so force and ambition on you. Yeah. Damn. But has anyone ever had 2000 wet rats on a runway?

I don't know. I think there is maybe some ASPCA issues there. But yeah, and also some public health. Hygiene. They are currently fighting against rats. Right. We don't want like, but maybe he got them all in one place. Yeah.

To be dealt with. Sure. Can I say old librarian who thinks his stamp is weirdly loud? I think that is this This is the quality guy. Oh, this my favorite of the movies where I'm like that is such a great bit Classic rule of three thing you have like it's funny once and by the time it's been like extended for a while We're just like I'm just like I love the library and the choice that it isn't like, oh, this guy's oblivious, he's not hearing the sound because of the stamp, that it starts to become this little tiny mini story of this guy being like, look, am I incredible at stamping shit? Also, am I the most

powerful man alive? Also the type of proof that shows why casting directors deserve Oscars. Because... Yeah, that guy's got a funny face. You need an appropriately weird looking guy to play a befuddled librarian. And go on this little arc of like, he's starting to feel himself, you know? Like this guy needs to be able to really act. He can't just pick a funny looking guy. That character grew and changed by the end of the film.

As much as any other. He goes on a journey. Now, help me out here. Like a funny looking guy. That character grew and changed by the end of the film. He did! As much as any other. He goes on a journey. He does. Now, help me out here. They learn, okay, we found the tomb. Henry's being held at this castle. Here's the route to the grail, the diary, all this stuff.

This is when Elsa's room has been ransacked, which we later learned she does. Is she doing that just to get in Indy's bed and like kind of win his trust? Or is there like a deeper conspiracy here that I don't... I think it's she really wants the grail diary. Right. And if she trashes her room too,

he'll never suspect that she went and rooted around his room. But I also think it's part of her playbook. She wants to seduce him or make him think that he is seducing her so that there is a guard down perhaps as well. Yeah. I think it's all part of the same pie. The Castle sequence. Someone underrated, I would say, in Indiana Jones. I agree.

Hearing you say you're like sort of... I don't want to put words in your mouth, but like a little underwhelmed perhaps compared to Raiders. No, I like this movie a lot. But I'm like, it's really only the third act that whiffs. Almost everything else is like a fun adventure. You mean the third act of this movie whiffs? Only in the sense that like the grail, like the idea. I love it.

I feel like you were the one who was kind of saying like, there's stuff about the end that I don't buy the stage. I don't think every single set piece is so fucking Fucking great and they're like five great Yeah, my whole thing with this movie is that it is basically whatever Spielberg is like Barry Bonds of like a high school game And I'll write like where it's like he can do this shit. So good at this point. He's done it He's it almost feels like George Lucas is like make my third Indie movie. He's like, bam, I just made it. Fuck you. I can do anything. And he does always the same year, which is not as good, but he's like, not only can I make your

third Indie movie like that, I can make it and then immediately make another movie. I'll make it in two months, whatever. Or like five amazing set pieces. Like, fuck you. He's just becoming a machine at this point. And so there's a, Yeah, like a slight... There's just something about this movie. I'm always, every time I watch it, I'm like, this is so fun, everyone's having a good time. Maybe it's just a little weightless to me.

I like the Connery stuff. Obviously, because it's great. I like Connery. Connery's reaction to the tank going over to the cliff adds like a full star to the movie for me. Because I'm like, that's really just enough for me in terms of like weight, emotional weight. Otherwise, what is this movie about?

I don't know. They got a motorcycle with a sidecar, now they're in a blimp. Rangers of the Lost Ark I think is so brilliant and scary and like the shadow of the Nazis hanging over it in such an interesting way. It's a better movie. It's so cool. And a deeper film.

Temple of Doom is like massively flawed. I think so, but this is one of those series where like I don't remember. Like I saw them all when I was a kid. They were never my movies. Like I was always a Star Wars kid more than like I was an indie kid, I guess. So I don't have like a deep like obsessive love of these things.

I wonder how often, because also I know Temple does not hold up. But Temple was, when I was a kid, Temple was pretty beloved. And I have a feeling for people who grew up while these movies were coming out. Being able to look at them in total afterwards is different. I have a feeling that for people who grew up with them, whichever one you saw first is generally your favorite. I think that's a classic right for these kinds of things. There is a whiny, piss baby, angry nerd YouTuber

that I hate watch who I will not get into any more specifics of. But is, Indiana Jones is one of his main beats and it's one of those things where he's just like, by Last Crusade they fucked it up. It's Spielberg doing kiddie shit. It's lost the stakes of like the adventure serial. There's some argument for... It's getting too emotional. I don't like that. Even with Star Wars, my kid loved the Ewoks. He loved the Ewoks. He loved the Ewoks.

It's the thing of like the argument of these things are for families and kids is fine. It's just annoying when then George Lucas is like every complaint directed and he's like, move it for kids, move on. And you're like, for sure. I mean, this guy, I'm like, you're the age where like you saw Raiders in theaters and it probably blew your minds. And then you were a little older and you saw a temple and you were like, this shit's scary. It's growing up with me.

And then by the time you see Last Crusade, you still fucking love Indiana Jones. But for the first time, you're maybe a little bit older than the movie. And he like throws it down a well and he talks about, he's spent so much time talking about like how they fucked up the Indiana Jones franchise and how it's his most beloved character. And I'm like, you like two out of the five movies. At this point, you dislike more Indiana Jones than you'd like. Like you just have to accept it.

Like you can just say, I love these two films. But at a certain point, if you're fighting against that much of the franchise, you're denying what it is. Enjoy, right. Why even care? The castle is great. It's great. The castle is great. It's great!

He sits the car, his kid doesn't know, they realize that they slept with the same girl. But the fucking Scooby-Doo revolving door. That's great, but like, Ford doing the Scottish accent. You know, Ford having a little bit of, you know, like, character fun. And comedy elapses.

But then also the guy calling it out, if you're a Scottish lord, I'm a, what's, blah, blah, blah, like, it character fun. And clearly fun. And really fun. But then also the guy calling it out, if you're a Scottish lord, I'm a... What's... Blah, blah, blah. Like, it's fun. Which also, much like Spielberg, it's like, Ford, in between these movies, did some more grown-up shit. You feel him being like, you know what,

it would be fun to just punch some guys and do some silly voices. I want to be Indiana Jones again. David. Yep. Are you ready? Yes. You ready? I want to be Indiana Jones again. David, are you ready? Yes. You're re- are you sure you're ready? This is a big decision. Don't say it if you don't mean it.

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Jumping ahead a little bit, but another what I assume is a stopper line that I think is incredibly good is when they're fighting about Indiana Jones's feeling of like indifference to him that he felt as a child, right? And like his like refusal to engage after your mom left all this sort of shit. We haven't talked in 20 years because of you. And Connery, one of his defensive lines is, well, you moved out just as you were starting to get interesting.

To get interesting, yeah. This thing of like... It's a bit of a brutal line. I have no interest in talking to children the second you start to become an adult, you moved out, and it's like, yeah, that's how it fucking works. You didn't want to be a dad. You didn't do the work.

There's also something to be said. Like, I think that there is truth to the kid's perspective of that, but I also think there is something quietly super fucking real about you understand your dad more when you've been through some stuff. And when you were a kid and you get old enough to understand, like, especially back then, historically,

like maybe a dad was gone all the time and that's the reason you had food and a house to sleep in and a lot of families need the dad. Back then, especially- But the dad clearly, he didn't deal with the loss of his wife very well. No, and like, but that emotionally, like, I don't know. And some of this obviously relates to conversations I had with my dad. But I'm like, I remember having a conversation with my dad once asked me.

My dad once said to me, I always liked calling you when we moved houses because you and I were really good about packing up a truck. And I remember saying to him, yeah, I remember during one of those days, it was the first time I felt like I could let my guard down and really like talk to you. And seeing, my dad had this heartbroken look on his face and he's like, wait, you were almost 30 at the time

that you're talking about. And I was like, yeah. And he's like, wait, you were almost 30 at the time that you're talking about. And I was like, yeah. And he was like, you didn't feel like you could let your guard down around me until you were 30? And it was heartbreaking. But when I watched that moment of him being like, you were just getting interesting, I'm like, I don't excuse any of it

in Henry Jones Senior or My Father, but I'm like, sometime, like that's real, that's real. That's so real. This is why also the Eskimo Brothers thing, even if it comes out of like a horny, I still need to be an Alpha Connery note and it's mostly played as a joke, there's something about this movie in the second half

forcing them to become contemporaries. That's why it works. That's real shit. Because it's just like he's seeing things from a different vantage point because he and his dad are now doing the exact same shit in lockstep. They're on the same adventure, they're in the same action sequences, they're after the same goal. They're keeping each other alive.

And he's like, I'm nothing like you, I spent my entire life trying to be that fucking guy named Fedora on the train. And it's like, no, you're doing my shit in different clothes. A little bit. And I think Senior comes to take his son more seriously because he watches him in action mode, which is something he doesn't do. Like, Senior doesn't do action mode. He's watching his son actually be in action mode.

But there's a lovely moment of Ford watching Connery chase the birds away with his umbrella. The birds is a really fascinating moment. And being like, my dad's just some guy. Like I feel like I've heard you talk about a lot in different circumstances. Your realization at some age as a nerd that your father knew the names of the members of the Fantastic Four. And being like, my dad is like a serious grown up who has a job and has no interest in my like childish bullshit. And then being like, not only were you into these characters when you were my

age, you still remember what their names are. This is in your head. You know, there's like that part of it of being like he's seeing kind of the little boy version of his dad in that moment. I think the hat's just crucial too. I think, I think... And for the character? Yeah, the Henry Jones senior has such a silly hat. His look is incredible. And he keeps being like, don't forget my hat.

In the same way that his son does, but his son has a cool hat. I think what I'm realizing as we talk it out loud is, and some of this is Sean Connery's performance, some of this is in the script, but I'm... I go... I will say, and David, I respect your opinions on film far more than my own, but I go, the dad-son stuff in this movie, I think, actually...

does make it significantly more than just it moves from set piece to set piece in a way that... But that doesn't start till halfway through. Once he shows up, the movie is much juicier. But I like that swerve. I mean, it's like, if the second half of this movie were a flipped mirror image of the first half, and the dad thing was not part of it, it would be like, yeah, this is just Spielberg showing off that he can do great sequences. I do like that the movie has this kind of like sneaky turn into thematic weight. And the weight is characterization, which is basically the thing that is avoided in the first two Indiana Jones movies.

There was characterization, but we're not really digging into the psychology of Indiana Jones. He's a character defined by action. And there's the sense of his relationships to these people But it's like I'm just fucking moving forward and his dad's the only person who can get him to stop and have to like reckon With shit and it's why I like starting with him as a little kid again because you're just like this guy isn't mythical He's a dude and like everything that's cool about him is like all of us a Direct result of who he was raised by, right?

For both good and bad. It also recontextualizes every other Indiana Jones movie now with the thing of, like, this guy's chasing his dad. And after you watch this one, you know that when you rewatch the other ones. Yeah. Yeah, it certainly... Especially Raiders. Temple of Doom is a strange movie to think about in any sense. But, you know, Indy's helping these kids. In Temple, I guess, there's this somewhat fatherly thing

with him in short round, you know, like this. I'm not saying that all of a sudden this turns into, like, a psychological breakdown of the characters that never got the credit it's due, but I do think this movie is more than set piece to set piece because of that exact stuff. Now, I agree... I think once Sean Connery shows up, it's... yes.

I agree with what you're saying Connery shows up, it's, yes. I agree with what you're saying for the prism of like, Spielberg is just a few years away from leveling up to being able to tell really complicated, mature adult psycho-emotional stories. And like in that context, you're just like, aren't you ready to move on from this? Even if this film has like emotional weight and something to say about like

fathers and sons and whatever, it's still doing that in a very pop, candy-coated way. And like, aren't we ready to like level up to a certain degree? But I think this is like the last time for me that he kind of has this right balance of doing this. There's a moment to Kill a Mockingbird, I believe it does not make the film, but where Atticus shoots this rabid dog. And in the process, one of his glasses lenses breaks

and then he reaches down with his heel and just grinds out the glass so it's not sharp and nobody gets cuts on it. Gets cut on it, he walks away, and Jem is amazed. And he's like, I can't believe my dad was the one that you guys all had take the shot. And one of the neighbors's like, I can't believe my dad was the one that you guys all had take the shot.

And one of the neighbors is like, do you not know that your daddy is the best shot in the county? And everyone's known that for fucking decades. And the sheriff is specifically a bad shot. The sheriff is like somebody's advocate. And they're like, why do you want our stuffy lawyer dad to do this? He's like, did you not know your dad is a fucking bad... And Indiana, like the Last Crusade is a movie-length exploration of the idea of, like,

hey, all this shit you don't know about your dad might just fill in some of the emotional gaps that a whole generation of fathers ravaged their sons with. And what you just said will basically always get me. Like, even in the worst executions of that, when I don't respect it intellectually, I'd be like, they are playing with, like, powerful materials there. It's always gonna stir a little something in me. And, like, being able to do it pretty well in a movie

that also delivers good fucking bits, and, like, five of the best directed action sequences you've ever seen. I'm just like, yeah, this is like a perfect movie movie for me. Listen, Field of Dreams, them playing catch. We were talking about right before this record. Never not make me cry. Yep. And I couldn't give less of a shit about baseball. And yet I watched that and I'm like, baseball is the most important thing that's ever existed.

You know, when they're throwing the ball around, I'm like baseball is the most important thing that's ever You know when they're throwing the ball around I'm like absolutely baseball Archie Moonlight Graham is the fisto of field of jazz now that is a good take that I have no objection to I think Archie Moonlight Graham is more important than Kip Fisto What the fuck are you? That's so mean to get this down is actually the most offensive word you could have used in that sentence. And I'm the bad boy of like, check! My whole problem with Kit Fisto is that Palpatine just...

The whole problem with Kit Fisto is that there are no problems with the character. That's a horrible way to start. The whole, the only problem with Kit Fisto is that characters should have weaknesses and flaws and he doesn't. But that's why I just hate. I just, I mean, I hate Revenge But that's why I just hate. I just... I mean, I hate Revenge of the Sith, I always will.

I won't be, you know, turned around by people being like, oh, it's about the fall of Rome and shit. And I'm like, yeah, I know it is, but it's not a good version of all this. David, I'm just gonna give you some advice. Don't go on Blank Check and say you hate an individual Star Wars movie because it could turn into a thing. I plan on it. It turns into a thing for you.

But like... You know, Mace Windu just shows up. And he's like, I'll bring three of my best guys. Yeah, the Jedi Wrecking Crew. Exactly. And Palpatine, who is one billion years old. I got such a good surprise for you for the end of this episode, by the way. Just goes like this. All right, well then let's move on to the Zeppelin scene.

Would you not watch a whole Archie Moonlight grand prequel to Field of Dreams? Sounds pretty cool. And do you know that Archie Graham Moonlight can hold his breath underwater and he can smell fear? And he's gotta be getting home so Alicia doesn't think he's got himself a girlfriend. The Zeppelin scene. Great. Anytime I see a Zeppelin. Which is not that often in the movie. No, not a lot.

You are kind of like, it's too bad this didn't work out. Because it does kind of seem nice, right? Where they're just like, it's just like a big ass restaurant, essentially. What a nice thing to see up in the sky. There's rumors we're coming back. And that's like a reminder of like, wait, this is actually though, technology that, there's a reason why we don't utilize it anymore. There's rumors they're bringing them back.

I think it's time. I think it's time. I think it's time. Environmental impact for short flights. Let's go back to Zeppelin's. But aren't we running out of Helio? Isn't that a thing? That's a great question.

Which is going to, I mean, just be fucking murder for the industry of doing funny voices. I know. We talk about this in next week's episode. But I think they just don't go that fast Right isn't that part of the problem with zeppelin's bit great. Let's slow down. Let's enjoy ourselves Our phones and float in the sky we're all so addicted to our phones I say as I spin the Disney Moji blitz wheel on two different devices There's a very good double gems

I would say there is a very funny consistent thing that I'm not nitpicking in last crusade though But it shows up in the zeppelin scene very prominently is a bunch of things that are so joyous funny awesome moments where the aftermath of them just like that It's the clerk spit of like you think about how many contractors are well No, the pacing of the aftermath doesn't add up my point being like oh, oh they punch the Nazi they throw him He lands on the big pile of luggage. No tickets. Everyone take those tickets Fantastic very funny gag very funny, but the idea that the zeppelin just then slowly floats away

Let's go Nazis react to that Nazi Len I mean look there's a few moments of that in this movie. Again, the boat explodes and then you're left to go like, okay, and I guess Indiana just grabs that little life thing and swims back to shore. But they do eventually, of course. Oh shit, we're turning around, we're back to Berlin.

Yes, maybe, is a little silly, like, I guess we should just use this plane that's right there. I said that Spielberg never gets this balance is right again Which of course is me realizing I stupidly am ignoring Jurassic Park, right? Which is truly the last time he gets the balance, right? But that is a movie where to this point of what you're saying, I think he's starting to realize it here He's like my understanding of like movie logic and spatial geography and what the audience sees and doesn't, what I'm like a fucking magician,

I'm making them look here and not think about this. He's starting to like fuck around and be like, I can put together a sequence that doesn't actually make any sense and not make people realize that it doesn't make any sense. You won't give a fuck. Little bit. And Jurassic has a ton of that.

Just don't overthink it. Which is like very skillful shit. And one of these things too, that it's like I rewatch it now by myself. And then you realize part of the pacing of that feeling weird is because that motherfucker knew the crowd would have been cheering. Yes! That a theater full of people is laughing and clapping at the... He's so good at this.

And if they're laughing, they're not going gonna think about the fact where it's like well Wait a second the zeppelin is still only five feet above the sky. They'd have 20 nazi dudes jumping doesn't matter right doesn't matter He was pacing it for the fucking applause break that he knew he got it's like hamburger had just performed This is what the tank thing is to where There I guess there will come a point, I guess, in any, you know, where these action movies, those kinds of sequences are pre-vis so well that it almost feels too easy, right?

Like, oh, he ducks just when he... But the tank sequence, you're just kind of like, I gotta just give it up. The thing that still makes Spielberg better at this than anyone else who has ever lived is the exact thing that the sort of, like, obsessive pre-vising before the script is done actually fights against, which is just, like, what are the character moments?

What are the moments in this that are gonna pop as, like, a laugh? And it's not because it's a dumb one-off joke. It's something that surprises you, where someone does something differently than you expect. It reveals something different about themselves. These sequences have their own internal, like arcs and peaks and valleys.

Like they're symphonic. And he knows, he knows, like, I gotta hold this shot for 30 seconds because if I do something right now, the audience is gonna be riding such a high from the last thing, they won't be able to process this. His mastery is just insane at this point. I had a very weird thought that ties into this,

which I think you guys will enjoy, which is... I've been to Hollywood studios many times. You're saying the Disney Park? The Disney Park. With the Indiana Jones... The Indiana Jones stunt spectacular. Which is a great show. It's a great little show, but it does this funny thing...

Probably my favorite play. Pre... Edward Alvey's Indiana Jones stunt spectacular. Stoppard quietly wrote all the dialogue in Last Crusade, and Alvey quietly wrote all the dialogue in the Indiana Jones stunt spectacular. But they do that funny thing, which when I was a kid I loved, which is like they presuppose that you're sitting in these bleachers watching the actual filming

of an action sequence in Indiana Jones. And then I get old and I wind up being lucky enough to be an actor who has been on some film sets, largely cut out of films as R-Blankies has danced on. But cut out of some big ass movies. But cut out of some huge movies. Also proud of my career. Anyway.

And have remained in the cut on some great films. Thank you so much. Making a joke, referencing my past chicanery on your show. By the way, same thing with me. My biggest credits on paper of the biggest movies I've been in are all the ones I've been cut out of. It's... It's how it fucking goes.

Also a sign of equality for you. It's fine. We're workers, we're workers. We're workers. But you go to it as an actor to the stunt show and you're like, ah, that's not how movies really work and it's silly they're pretending this is a movie. And then you rewatch an Indiana Jones movie and you're like, I bet Steven Spielberg

was running this set way closer to the actual tenor and tone of the Indiana Jones stunt spectacular in Hollywood Studios than any other movies have in heaven. He actually runs a set that cleanly, especially, again, people... There are just no complaints from this. Now, Raiders, that was hard. Everyone gets Death and Terry, it's crazy shit going on. Jaws was hard.

By now, it's kind of just like, nah, he's just completely in charge of this shit. I bet there are fucking crazy amounts of trucks and scaffolding and cranes and shit and things flipping up and people diving off of buildings and doing flips. Like, all that shit they show at the Stunt Spectacular. I'm like, I am willing to buy into the kayfabe that a Steven Spielberg set is actually as fun and crazy as that Stunt Spectacular.

I think so. That's kind of all you hear from people who work on his movies. I do think, we mentioned it already, but I do think, you know, Connery's reaction to the tank going over, the way he just like simply and quickly plays... He no sells it. ...the entire... After so much good action though, right? The brothers of the Cruciform Sword have come back.

There's people fighting on the tank, and on top of the tank. The tracks, the way the conveyor belts. The people being rescued from the tank treads. Indy holding his dad's leg with the whip as his dad bounced on the tank treads. Dude's literally riding shotgun in this entire action sequence and he's like, yawn, who cares? The crazy tank guy. This is children's shit.

You also mentioned before like the Indiana Jones habit of just like, this guy is the blank, the tank pilot with that good, the crazy leather hat and got like it's got, it's so fun. He just didn't think his son was going to die. And obviously he doesn't die, but like Connery has that, just that moment of like, and he convinces us, he convinces us. Right. Like it's actually, fuck.

I actually didn't get to tell him like all these things I meant to tell him. Here's another thing that quietly belies five minutes him Being so shocked at the idea that Indiana Jones died does quietly Speak to a level of respect he has for what he would never have said Oh, wow, right because he's like I know my son goes off and all these stupid fucking adventures And he's going through like pitfalls and traps and shit. I never worry he's gonna die. Right. I know that's why I've been putting off the five great at being Indiana Jones. I hear he's off in some fucking Peruvian like booby trapped,

you know, 10. Yeah, I don't think I should have called him and said, hey, I love you before he goes off. So that all happens. Now to me, the emotional arcs of this movie are pretty much resolved. And it's time for a wonderful, like LucasArts video game point and click adventure, like sequence, which is the grail. And my counterpoint to that...

The puzzles of the grail and then the emotional puzzle of the night, you know? My counterpoint to that, which is what I said earlier, which is him having to do it alone and revealing how much he has ingested of what his father's, of his father's work does add a new wrinkle onto the emotional closure. I agree with you that it's like they've gotten to the place where they can admit to each other that they love each other. There is still this one added step of like,

I'm more like my dad than I realized. All of his life's work is in my bones. And every kid, and I felt this with my dad, Spielberg clearly felt it with his. Just that feeling of like, this sting of like, why didn't my dad ever slow down and have that five minute conversation with me is also coupled with why does every son assume that his father hasn't actually thought hard about who he is and why he's behaving and how it relates to his son.

And you're like, ooh. And then to immediately follow it up with like, he just fought a tank by hand, saved you in the process, fell off a fucking cliff. fought a tank by hand, saved you in the process, fell off a fucking cliff. And it's like you have the one moment of emotion that you share and then he collapses from exhaustion and you go, no, get the fuck up, we gotta get back to work.

We're almost at the end. Is like, God damn it, it's right back into it. But now we understand each other. It's like the dad has to go through his arc of like, fuck, what would my regrets have been if that was the last time I ever saw you? Now, Indiana Jones is on the flip side of that, which is like his dad's been fucking shot.

And the stakes of this now, like fucking Tomb Raider level he has to go through is, if I fuck this up and I don't do it in time, my dad's dead. And we're now at the stage of life where the son takes care of the fuck Break breaks you are never ever ever ever concerned that he's not gonna he's gonna do it as an audience member No, but those are the stakes for Indiana Jones the character. That's why he still has unresolved shit It's fine. You know, he's gonna do it. Yes to trust his dad

This means he has to trust his dad take the amuses me. He has to trust his dad. He has to take the leap of faith and all that. The penitent man shall pass. What amuses me so much is I think all that stuff is great. The puzzle solving stuff is so cool. The floor with the Jehovah, the leap of faith is the coolest thing. The misspelling. Oh, just the right bit.

Jehovah starts with an H. But dodging the blades. Then he gets to the grail. Now let's discuss this sequence. It's a fountain or whatever, a pool of water. The holy water thing you see at the front of every church. It's a knight in knightly armor, chain mail. It's old ass dude.

This motherfucker has been there for 700 years. No teeth. Not even a crossword puzzle. This guy can't do word every day. The same thought. I've been on your fucking years. He's been sitting around and these assholes ruin it. It went through the tech test. Had word.

How many times would he have gone through like all of the words? Every five letters of the word. Eliminate the amount of word words like this guy's getting like Queen Bee every day. Stepping hundred years. He's getting spanagram and strands. He's eating whatever they can eat. He's fucking, probably jerking off relentlessly. He doesn't have fucking pop ramen.

Do you think he jerks off? This guy! This guy! This guy! Do you think he jerks off? Wait, here's my question. He's a religious man. Do you think every day he picks a new cup to jerk off to?

Because that's the only thing he can look at. This fucking guy for seven, they say it's 700 years of silence sitting there. Guys, I'm sorry. Breaking news. Yeah. I was just sent two texts from my father. This is breaking news. Do you know what I'm about to say?

He's going to tell you he loves you for the first time. This is big. From Peter Newman. This is breaking news. Do you know what I'm about to say? He's gonna tell you he loves you first This is big From Peter Newman deadline link draft day feature to be adapted for TV Oh, I did I did I did just yeah with a basketball twist and my dad says time to bring back Rick the end I mean get him in there is You didn't tell me this fucking news It just it just it just noticed it. I can't trust this guy.

Um, is Rick Hall grown up? These are the questions I hope they're asking. Is it, um, you know, is this like, uh, the fucking suits LA where it's like, Oh, it's suits LA. Does it have any of the guys from suits? And they're like, no, it's just like a legal show set in LA. We're just calling it suits. Like is Costner involved?

You know, like, do we have, you know, do we have folks? I don't know, let me be the one fucking legacy character. That's what I'm saying. I never thought I'd say this, but guys, we're at the Grail night scene and we need to focus on it. This is what I wanted to say. I thought the thing I've been promising

to recite back to you was in text. Then I looked, the text exchange was the, he's a bad archeologist. The thing you said was said in person, I believe, at the Gether 10th anniversary show. Oh, the reunion show. The reunion show, which was such a wonderful night. You said this to me backstage where I said, like, hey, and we'll do Last Crusade in a couple months. 10th anniversary group. 15.

15. You're right. This show is 10. That was 15. So, excuse me while I paraphrase this. This fucking Grail Knight. But you said to me, something to the effect of, I think one of the funniest bits of all time is this guy being in this fucking cave for like 700 years with nothing. And Indiana Jones showing up and immediately fucking up his entire life. Just like he fucked up the catacomb under Venice.

He fucked up the cross-acord. But it's so personal for this guy. Fucking guy for 700 years has been like, where's the next night that's going to come take over? Indiana Jones comes. He doesn't even allow the guy to finish explaining, hey man, finally, you don't look like a knight. Indiana Jones straight up cuts him off and is like, eh, not my thing, man. That's not really how this is about. And then before he can finish his sentence,

the Nazis come, pick the wrong cup. That guy turns into a fucking Beetlejuice character. It's weirdly scary. Yeah, yeah. Then Elsa is all fucked up. She drops the thing, because she just straight up can't even listen for ten fucking... Her ADHD is like, just don't take it past the thing. She takes it past the thing.

We got the earthquakes. And then I think the... One of the saddest and also funniest moments in maybe all of cinematic history... I'm doing this. ...is that guy gives a sad little wave. Bye! He's been waiting 700 years and two minutes later... Cinematic history is that guy gives a sad little wave Waiting 700 years and two minutes later

This asshole Indiana Jones Find it this movie has three beats the cross of Coronado. He makes everything explode the fucking Templar Knights grave he makes it explode. He finally finds the Holy Grail. He fucks that up too. In your words, maybe the funniest bit of all time. That little wave that night gives is so sad and so funny. What is happening to that night, do you think? He wants, he's been praying for death. Well, no, of course I know, but I'm saying like,

because of all the stuff that happened. He's been praying that happened for like 694 years we are to assume that he has Drank from the correct cup and he gets centuries earlier and he gets to live forever And you can finally get the sweet release of a well-earned death move on here's my question Indy comes in and let's just go through what happens. Indy comes in, right, he's kind of like, I don't know, man, I kind of just need to save my dad.

Nazis come in. This is a moment I just think we have to touch on. The night's like, okay, well, choose a fucking cop. Be careful. Just texting my manager the draft day link. Elsa is like, let me choose. Julian Glover's like, yeah, sounds good. She does it on purpose, right?

I assume what she's doing is on purpose, right? They make eye contact. Yeah, so nonetheless, how fucking dumb is Julian Glover that he's like, yeah, you know what, actually you pick. And she's like, literally just goes like this one. Like she doesn't even walk the length of the cups. She just kind of grabs one. This is my point though.

It's like he's, he is just some dumb dork. No, no, no. He could have walked over to that old ass night, grab his nuts and twisted them and been like, tell me which one. Ask a couple questions, just take a cursory glance. Just tell me which one, you weird old man. Instead he's like, ah, it looks great, it's gold.

You're in Kruger's syndrome. This guy thinks he knows everything. We're blowing past the part where Indiana Jones is like, oh, it looks great. It's gold. You're double Kruger syndrome. This guy thinks he knows everything. We're blowing past the part where Indiana Jones is like, who are you? And he's like, I'm one of three brothers. And Indiana Jones straight up is like, oh, so you're 700 years old? Anyway, man, I'm kind of not into this. This is not really my scene. I love this movie so much, but the end is like...

Indy has the... It's like a game of... I need to save my dad. This set piece sort of is like playing Mouse Trap. Everything is like, now this, now this, now this, now this. To be fair, Spielberg said when Lucas initially pitched him the Holy Grail, Spielberg was like, is there anything fun you can do with the ending of the Holy Grail?

Like, is there enough, is there like a special effects thing you can do? Like, what's the... He was a little concerned, like, is it a little boring at the end? I think that this ending is so iconic and well regarded. They figured it out. And obviously the special effects thing they figured out was the rapid aging is cool, right? Like that, we'll do that.

But everything that's... It's just like the only time pressure is on Indie, which is I want to save my dad. There's no time pressure on Julian Glover. He could just, like, really kind of be like, I'm gonna take a look at every single cup. He could just go, save your dad so I know which one is the right one. That's an option for him. There's a lot of options for him.

Anyway, instead... Some would actually say that's why he shot the dad. But he's just like, glug, glug, glug, Beetlejuice. I love it. I mean, I love it. I love him turning into Beetlejuice. Meanwhile, this night like, glug, glug, glug, beetle juice. I love it. I mean, I love it. I love him turning into beetle juice. Let's remember this whole thing was, he was the most pure one.

So his two brothers, he was like, They failed. Goodbye, my brothers. We will never see each other again. Survival of the fittest. He is the one. He assumes I'm the first link in a chain where other nights will achieve this,

take over and it will last for eternity and instead the first guy who shows up fucks it all up and he just goes, I guess I could have been fucking and eating cheeseburgers for the past fucking 700 years because the first asshole to come take over fucked it up. Here's a fun thing to consider. Indiana Jones sucks as an archaeologist this guy doesn't even know that movies exist This dude has no idea. He's not a bit like printed words Well, God and he would have loved that dude he doesn't know about Nintendo now he actually does weirdly there's a Dude, he doesn't know about Nintendo. No, he actually does.

Weirdly, there's a deleted scene where he's like, I love Nintendo. But in the end, Jesus has permitted Nintendo to cross the Great City. But you know, this asshole's like, he only had Duck Hunt. It wasn't even the double partridge with Mario Brothers. Oh, he just had the Duck Hunt.

His whole life was playing Duck Hunt for Sam's part. With the controller. Yeah. So, okay, so Julian Glover dies. Julian Glover His whole life was playing duck hunt for Sam's One full scan. Just one full scan. Hearing you guys say Spielberg was never particularly interested in the Grail lore, this, I will say, and again, you've given him a million props about his mastery. Mm-hmm. Like, this one does feel like a guy who doesn't give a fuck about this has made it the... like, the ultimate goal of the movie. And you can sort of feel that he doesn't totally give a fuck about the Grail itself.

He's done. He's wrapping it up. Cup is proven good, okay? Takes it to Connery, saves Connery, that problem is solved. Now it's kind of like, okay, now what do we do, right? And of course, Elsa takes it across the Great Seal, which is not Indy's fault. You're disparaging his, he doesn't cause that chaos, that is Elsa's fault.

Everywhere he goes in an archaeological sense, though, the place explodes or collapses. For three weeks. Crack opens in the earth. Elsa falls down it. You know, she... Indy tries to rescue her. She's too tempted by the cup. She falls to her death.

Indy resists the temptation of the cup, gets out, instead goes with his dad. The cup, the grail cup falls into the abyss, right? Yeah, onto that little ledge. But like then, yeah, this is my question. They all leave. Grail Knight, as we know, goes like, uh, bye. Right? The whole thing's falling down.

Fuck me, I guess. Is Grail Knight still going to live and just kind of be stuck there still? Is he gonna go get the cup back? Where's the cup gone and Grail Knight's about to die? Grail Knight has the craziest choice to make of anyone in the history of Earth, which is like, do I just... No one else, I guess, cares about this half as much as I thought.

So I guess now do I stay here and live? Is the Grail lost to him? Well, there's another option that ties into this, which is that there's another logic, which is, so grail night, I, Indiana Jones, this is not my thing, but my father has now drank from the cup and conceivably he spent his whole life chasing this.

And it's actually my father that should be doing this. And my father has sort of lived in absentia in a way that I've always resented, but if it was for the purpose of this, maybe this was the higher purpose, he could stay. And we just watched him drink from the Holy Grail. And they poured it on his tummy. Henry Jones Sr. also is like, nah, I got illumination out of it.

I got everything I wanted. Peace, Grail Knight. I'm not even gonna ask you a question. Much like, yeah, he's, no. Yeah, just no further input required. But much like in Rage of the Lost Ark, it's like, oh, what's in the ark? And it's like, I don't know, weird ghost,

let's get out of here. You know, like, and this one, it's like, oh, what was the mystery of the Grail? It's like, I don't fucking know. It fell into a pit, let's go. Arguably, Henry Jones Sr. could have stayed there, let the Grail what was the mystery of the grail? It's like, I don't fucking know. It fell into a pit. Let's go. Arguably, Henry Jones Sr. could have stayed there, let the grail night have the sweet release of death.

Marcus Brody could have been sent to any 99 cent store to get one of those little arm extender grabber things. A grabbing stick. They could have gone got one of them grabbers, gotten the grail back, and Henry Jones Sr. could have taken his turn as the new grail knight. But why would he want to do that? It sucks. It's the worst job in the fucking world.

He's dedicated his entire life to this... To finding it. But the whole thing with the Holy Grail is right. You get there and you're like, hell yeah, and it's like, couple of tach... couple of provisos here. One, you can't leave. Two, no one's here. So it sucks.

What do you think the Grail Knight, like, when they were all leaving, he would have been like, no, guys, no, wait, one of you has to take over, and they'd be like... Nah, I'm sorry, man. It does raise the question. I mean, they obviously like... We got TikTok and shit now, dude. Like, we gotta go, man. They fixed Connery's bullet wounds.

Right? But it's like, by feeding him the water, is he now... Does he live forever? No, no, no. No, because in Crystal Skull, he's got the picture on his desk. This is Forky's question. No. You don't live forever just by drinking from the grail one time. You gotta keep drinking from it.

Oh, and it's not just you drink it once and you stay there. Correct. And so that's the kind of, you know, poisoned chalice thing of like, yay, I can live forever. Yeah, you can live forever in this room. Do you like cups? Living a grail night's life. Yeah, this room has cups in it.

It's cup room. Do you like anything but cups a grail night's life. Yeah, this room has cups in it. It's not life at all. It's cup room. Do you like anything but cups? Does he jerk off into every cup? Yes, yes. Okay. Guys, that's a little sacrilegious. To your point. Do you think that's a little sacrilegious actually?

You're gonna jerk off into the lollygowns? Just a wee bit sacrilegious. To your point about it feeling like Spielberg doesn't really give a shit about the grail, do you think they were all pissed that they had already blown knowledge was the real treasure? That it feels like this movie is building to some sort of line? Illumination always struck me as a very weird line.

Both in that it's a little soft and there's so many tie-ins that have, like, Holy Blood, Holy Grail has been written, Da Vinci Code isn't out yet, but this idea that the Holy Grail ties into the Illuminati is out there. And it feels like illumination is a weird... What'd you get out of it? That illumination.

It feels like they're backed into a corner of how do we not double beat the ending of the last one? But it's like, that line doesn't make a ton of sense in Temple of Doom versus what's going on in that movie. Whereas in this, it's like what you want him or Connery to say is something like, no, the grail doesn't matter. It's like this, it's what we know

and it's what we care about and the friends we made along the way. There's a literal 700 year old man there that they just ignore dealing with. Either way though, just to be clear, this is all nitpicky fun things at the end. This movie rules. And the ground light's one of the greatest characters of all time. I can't be on to what we're all saying.

It's a fun little mini movie. Like, it really does feel like a point and click adventure to me. This sort of like... How old do you think the Grail Knight was when his dick could no longer get hard? I don't know. When did he stop jerking off in the cups? Like, when was that even off the table?

Does drinking from the grail make your dick sexually? Well, I also, my favorite thing is- Isn't the original Bluetooth? Bluetooth. But my thing is also he's in his armor. He could have taken it off, right? But he's in his armor. He like walks up to Indy and Indy's like, what?

And like he falls over. Indy doesn't even really push him. And he's like, anyway, you beat me. So like, you know, like he's so eagerly like, oh, like, yeah, that counts as single combat BTW and I wanna go. What do you think the ground night want? Like he wants to sprint out there

and like get one or two last things in before he crumbles into dust. He's like, thank you. You're taking over. Here's my sword. That's a good question. The second he like crosses the seal, is it like, hey, by the way, dude, you have like 40 minutes left to live.

Your body's going to give out. Or does he get like three days to just go party? Yeah. Does he end up having like a scent of a woman weekend? Does he want to go do molly? You know? He would die immediately. I think not because of the rules, just because it's like, you are 700 years.

Yeah. Maybe not. Maybe he gets a few days. I don't think the same thing happens to him that happened to Carl Veers. No, no, no. Veers is being punished for his folly. Yeah. That's like a...

Veers gets turned into like Tales from the Crypt. He gets turned into a crypt. That shit rocks me as a nine year old and I never forgot the central memory. The hair growing is great, obviously, like as the first. And then you cut to him. Her freaking out rocks. Because she literally wanted this to happen

and nonetheless is like, what the hell? But how do you guys feel as her Nazi outfit is smoking hot? She looks really good. Yeah, I have less of a take on this than you guys. Did you see our... Chris keeps staring us back. Chris, did you see RRR? RRR?

The big Hollywood epic of a couple years ago? If it came out since Cal was born, I almost definitely see it. She is in that playing basically the older version of this character, right? Like horrible colonialist woman. I'd like to think with Grail Knight that after this all goes down, he grabs a bottle of champagne that he's been holding onto. And then like a streamer comes down that says happy retirement and believes fall down from the ceiling.

He gets a bunch of like novelty greeting cards from the ceiling. He gets a lot. He gets a bunch of like novelty greeting cards over the hill, too old to count. Exactly. He just sadly takes a swig out of the bottle. Yeah. And that's that. They give him a gold watch. And he's off. He moves into the Margaritaville intentional housing community.

Yeah. So is everything about Indiana Jones better? if this movie ends with that sequence, they leave, get on the horses, ride into the sunset, Spielberg just absolutely, again, just kind of being like, pfft, just do that, best shot, cool shot, and then that's it. And by the way, what I love about it, it goes on for so long. It's one of those things as they're riding off into the sunset and the silhouettes, it's so beautiful. You're like, oh, I'm like conditioned from movies

of like at some point this will fade to black as the credits play. The shot goes on for like six minutes. It's a real kind of like. You see them get so tiny. Yeah. It is a guitar solo. I will say like, I don't,

not to bring it back to something divisive, but it's because these are this sort of like old school serial style pulpy adventure, it's very, very easy to ignore the ones you don't like as much. Whereas Star Wars, which obviously is connected, has this lore and this mythology and this religion. But that would only be true if they had continued

to make an indie every sort of like five to six years instead of like, now we wait 17 years or whatever or 19 years however long you know Crystal Skull comes out the weight of expectation is far too large it has to be about the legacy guys both done Crystal Skull and Dial of Destiny are like how do we make a movie that responds to the weight of expectations of Indiana Jones is back and dealing with the advanced age and what is a proper ending for him. There's just a moment where, in the mid-90s, Spielberg should have either just been like,

fine, I'll make a fourth one, like, we should just keep doing this, or done what he did with Jurassic Park where he's like, I did three, I, you know, I did plenty, like, someone else can do that. But there's a thing we're not acknowledging here, which is that, like, Ford just always wanted to play the character again.

Like, Ford wouldn't drop it. And he wouldn't drop it, but they would have. Yeah, kept being like, please, please, please, guys. Yeah, but the problem is Lucas gets bogged down in starting with the prequels, Spielberg gets bogged down in being like a studio mogul who makes Schindler's List and Oscar winning shit. I would still argue like, one of the heartbreaking things

about Star Wars is the Mrs. Like... Well, with Star Wars, it's a woven together saga. A grand epic. And because of that, like, my son's gonna grow up with a Star Wars where the Mrs. do take away some of the magic that I got to grow up with. I do not think that Indiana Jones' Mrs.

take away the magic of Raiders or Last Crusade. No, I think the two sequels being so far away doesn't mean you can kinda keep it hermetic. Even Temple, even Temple's flaws. Right, sure. I could sit down, Raiders is, or Crusade is rather, and some of this obviously I have such clear, you know, personal memories of being in the theater

with my dad. But has there ever been a time where Last Crusade or Raiders of the Lost Ark is on cable and you don't stop and watch for at least five or six minutes? Like, it's one of those. Always and forever. Yeah, and nothing can ding that. And I think it is because, like, you know,

the guys who wrote the Pirates of the Caribbean movies talk about when that first movie was such a surprise success and they were like, Disney wants a trilogy, the first question they asked themselves was, are we Star Wars or Indiana Jones? And I think a lot of franchises these days make the mistake of being like, we have to be Star Wars. We have to try to weave an intentional epic, a narrative that feels like it was planned from the beginning, all these things. And there's like a real benefit to being like Indiana Jones, make

it up as you go along. Just have fun. Play around, you know? And I think that does help its legacy where you're just like, there's nothing any amount of other Indiana Jones shit can do that will ever damage the earlier films. Like you're like, it probably would have been better if they never made a fourth or fifth movie, but I also don't think they really take away from anything. Whereas not to talk about stories, but their shit in Rise of Skywalker. I'm like, it leads up to that. That does sort of color other shit for me, you know, as much as the movies like themselves are objects that can't be damaged.

There's these moments that do get, like you watch Andor and you sit there and you're like, oh, the way that they are looking back at the original movie and this series actually shows you like, no, this world had turned into a fascist dystopian nightmare. And then you think about how Rogue One leads into it and you go like, man, people had gotten to the point where they're like killing their own allies for making noise to make sure they don't get killed. And that's so grim and it's so dark. And then you think about the foolishness of a teenage kid going, oh, the Death Star, that's not much worse than shooting out a womp rat back home. And you're like, you needed a kid that naive to be able to pull this off. And in a hopeless world, everyone must,

Andor does such a good job of getting it back. The grimness of the audacity of even having hope. And some of those attempts at Star Wars do get it back, which is why Last Jedi making Luke cynical is an absolute betrayal. All right, I don't wanna talk about that. David, how'd this movie do with the box office? So, May, Memorial Day, 1989.

It's the, like we said, the... To be clear, George Lucas, that was his entire plan for the... Guess, doing a bunch of hand-trips. I wanted to avoid it, but you set it up. All cynicism, hurdles. You had to do it. You had to say it. No idealism lasts. Even Tintin and the Peekaroos. The final completed Tintin novel.

Right? The graphic novel. I don't love that you pointed at my hairline when you even Tintin and the picarose the final completed Tintin novel, right the graphic novel I don't love that you pointed at my hairline. Well, you know what? Specifically the hairline not even at you know Tintin is always a fairly idealistic person, right? And it's only and literally in pretty much in the last few books You're starting to see like a bit the slightest edge with him But it's only Tintin and the Picaros, which is the final book, hair, J completed before he died. Where Tintin suddenly is not wearing his plus fours,

the pants he used to wear. He's wearing longer pants. The short pants, yeah. Yeah, he's wearing like sort of flared pants. I love you making direct eye contact and scrolling down Tintin. I want you to hear about Tintin. This is you handing me my ass

after years of me tormenting. Right, and Tintin and the Picaros is about, they go to this sort of fictional Latin American country that's been in the books before, and their friend, General Alcazar, who they've had adventures with before, he's on the outs, he's become this kind of guerrilla fighter. They help him take over and kick out the sort of,

the mean general who's in charge, right? But the book begins with them landing, like the plane, and you sort of the mean general who's in charge, right? But the book begins with them landing like the plane and you sort of see the city and there's like a cop spinning a, you know, a bat, you know, whatever. Billy Club. Billy Club, right. And then in the end of the book when they're leaving, you see the same cop, he's just got a different uniform on and there's sort of, Hergé's cynicism abounds a little bit. And Tintin is more cynical of this, like,

we're not really doing good here. You know what I mean? Creator cynicism or is it Tintin? Yes, the creator, but you see it in Tintin for the first time. It's starting to bleed in. Yes, and it's so fascinating to me. I think I get the point you're making.

Any idealistic character. It sounds like what you're saying is that General Alcazar is the fisto of Tintin. I mean, General Alcazar is a character I truly adore, so sure, yes, I'll go with that. But also to just bring this all together, right? Like, I love the Tintin movie, you love the Tintin movie, Spielberg made his Tintin movie. He did, yeah. That is...

That's more classic Tintin of like, he's the sweet kid who, you know... But also in direct relation to this movie, I'm like, that's just Spielberg having fun. That movie is not about anything. Not really. It's about less than the books are. Yeah, no, yeah, for sure. It's like, it's Zura filmmaking shit and him being like, look at what I can do with new technology.

And I think you put that next to Last Crusade and Last Crusade's got a little more on its mind than the Tintin movie as a text. Yeah. Last Crusade is... Quite a bit more, I should say. Not even a little more. Yeah. I just think at this point, Spielberg has more depth. He does.

Oh, I just wanted to say, wet chonker. The actor's name is J.J. Hardy. There we go. Of course, that's that guy's name. Read up on J.J. Hardy. So it go. Yeah. Of course that's read up on J.J. Hardy. Yeah. So it opens number one, Griffin, $37 million. Memorial Day weekend. For the four day.

Can you now please get me the name, individual names of all 2000 wet mice? All right. All right. You're on it, Beth. Number two at the box office, Griffin, is a comedy from like a duo who did a lot of movies together, but I think this is seen as maybe their worst.

I think it's also their last. Is it Another You? No, what's that? No, okay. Is it a prior and wilder movie? So, okay, okay, it is prior and wilder. Right, Another You is their true last. It's their second to last.

It's their second to last. So this one is See No Evil, Hear No Evil. I feel like a movie Ben likes, or you would watch a lot as a child. Oh, obsessed. That was weirdly this movie that I feel like I caught on cable TV enough times that then I ended up having it on VHS. I brought comedy with the premise of what if one guy was blind and one guy was dead.

And they get involved in like a murder mystery or whatever. But it's not, I haven't seen it. It's not well regarded, right? This scene is a bad movie. Well, cause a lot of the comedy is based around their disabilities. Sure. Yeah. Which the actors, of course, do not have.

Right. Another you is the one, though, that is like truly dire. That's 1991. I mean, and that point, prior must be really... Yeah, he's not in good shape. Struggling. Yeah. Number three, The Box Office.

A film we mentioned on this episode several times. Inspiration or... Maybe not inspiration. Office, a film we mentioned on this episode several times, a heartwarming drama. Field of Dreams? Field of Dreams. Oh, wow. Yeah. Is doing great at the box office, kind of like a Little Engine That Could type movie. And will sort of walk its way to a surprise Best Picture nomination.

Correct. Number four at the box office. Are you just leaving, Geth? I legitimately am about to miss my son's school. Yeah, you gotta go. I don't leave. So, my father. I gotta give you this. What's that? I have long promised to send something for Cal, your son.

Oh, that's so nice. And you did send it. You sent a Kit Fisto onesie when he was born. I did. A couple times I've asked for address to send it, but now I haven't. I'm so sorry to have to run, but I- I've got so much shit about trying to keep the train on time. And now like, Geth has a heart out. We were having fun.

You guys were having fun. Crazy idiots. You want me to open this on mic? I think so. A gift for my son? I think so. It's also my son? I think so. It's also good to remind your viewers that I'm not a monster. I do have a life.

You do. And you're a dear friend. You really have to stop looking at Reddit, Chris. Like 99% of people do not think you're a monster. I've also met so many blank check fans. Like I'll go on the road and they come to stand up shows of mine and they are lovely. Yes. In person.

Great to hear. Yeah. Absolutely. There are lovely yes in person great to hear yeah absolutely there are two items in here oh my goodness and these are for your son you got a star wars battle jedi verse darth city this is specifically a box set of the jedi wrecking crew it is your favorite moment it is the three guys showing up to fight Sidious. This is really... The other item... Amazing. Which I couldn't believe existed. Transformers...

Dude! A Kit Fisto Transformer? It is a robot Kit Fisto that transforms into Kit Fisto Starfighter. That's so fucking sick. It just feels like your son's at Star Wars age now. He's at Star Wars age and Transformers age. Here we go. He's Delta VII, Esperite class. I'm truly touched. Thank you.

You're welcome. Sorry to be out of here. Get out of here. No, it's all good. Thanks for doing the admin. Anything to plug? You're doing your new show at UCB? That show at UCB hosted by Chris Gether. It's selling out months in advance.

I'm not sure why, but I'm very flattered. Live in New York, but also live stream tickets available. You can get live streaming tickets for, yeah, it's the last Wednesday of every month beautiful anonymous Still going strong. It's a good look at humanity one human at a time. Thanks everybody We'll drop links in the episode description for all that And get this running with a box full of kitfisto toys sent Hallie and your son might love No, no, did we finish the five? Number four at the box office. Cult movie.

Not really a big hit at the time. People forget. I mean, it was a whatever. Okay. It was a reasonable hit. But has become quite a cult movie. Has become quite a cult movie. Give me a jump.

Action? Action. I guess it was recently remade. It was recently remade. It was recently remade. Yeah, it's kind of like an action drama. How to describe it. Wikipedia describes it as an action film. What studio distributed the picture?

Oh, United Artists. United Artists. It's a silver film, Joel, a silver film. It's not Red Dawn. But you've got the right actor. It's a Swayze. Mm-hmm. Huh.

What is it? It's not Point Break, that's later. No. It's the Swayze movie that's a big cult. Oh, Roadhouse. I just got re-muted. Yep, Roadhouse. Yeah, Roadhouse, sorry.

What do you think of Roadhouse? Yeah, I get it. It's never been mine, but I'm like, I understand the cult around it. Do you like Roadhouse? Hell, yeah, of course. Yeah, of course, yeah get it. It's never been mine, but I'm like I understand the cult around it like Roadhouse. Oh, yeah. Yeah, of course. Yeah Fun. Mm-hmm. Yeah, man He was a philosophy major. Yeah, now he's a freaking best bouncer all around he rips out throats Yeah, dude number five at the box office. Mm-hmm is a

film that I I think I've described on this podcast. It's a very specific film. It's a major movie star who often would direct himself, but this is one of the ones where he's being directed by one of his guys. It's a Clint? It's a Clint movie.

Is it like Firefox? Not Firefox, it's Clint directed Firefox. Okay, but it's in that zone? It's not Iger Sanction that's earlier? It's Clint also directed Iger Sanction, which is an amazing movie. I don't remember which ones he didn't direct. Well, I will say this, I described it, I think,

on this show as what if Clint Eastwood played Gene Parmesan? Because it's one of those movies where you're like, it's about like kind of a skip tracer, right? He's this guy who like- Is it like Bronco Billy? What is that? Not Bronco Billy. I don't know what that movie's about.

Clint also directed that, that's a really good movie. God damn it. Skip Tracer, you know, so like a guy who like Bronco Billy. What is not bronco Billy's? I don't know what that movie directed that that's a really good Damn it Skip Tracer, you know, so like a guy who like basically finds people Yeah, and the premise of the movies like he's really good at like donning disguises to catch people and like Is it called the blank no, it's called pink Cadillac Oh, I never knew that's what that movie was about. I guess you've told me it's a movie. It's a Buddy Van Horn movie.

Buddy Van Horn also directed it, any which way you can, and The Deadpool. Pink Cadillac opening at number five, so I think probably not a bigger success for him. Only made 12 million dollars, but it's Clinton, Bernadette Peters. Yeah, okay. You've also got K-9, that's the Jim Belushi dog movie right outgrossing

Turnhoush. No, thank you You've got Pet Sematary the original adaptation of Pet Sematary. That is pretty good. Yeah solid movie pretty scary Directed by Mary Lambert. Yeah, that's well my film. You have a film that Ben likes a lot a little movie called major leak Well, well, well and film. You have a film that Ben likes a lot, a little movie called Major League. Well, well, well. And Bob Buecher just died. You know Bob Buecher? The announcer? Bob Buecher is a famous announcer,

but he also was really funny. And so he's the announcer in Major League and he has two of my favorite line deliveries ever. One of course is just a bit outside, which is so funny. Kind of a proto Fred Willard and best in show performance. But it just always gets me where he's like, you know, setting up like, all right, and it's all stakes on the line. And then the other team gets in and he goes, ah, shit.

It just always makes me laugh. Can we do Major League? Yes, we can. We can just do it. We can just do it. We can do whatever the fuck we want. We run this podcast. We can do whatever we want.

We're in charge. We have no bosses. We always were kind of like, oh, well, maybe we'll do David S. Ward. It's like we're not gonna do that. The directors. Maybe we do David S. Ward. No, come on. We're finally gonna knock out some David S. Ward. So I think we could do major leagues one and two on our Patreon. Do we do back to the minor? Yeah, we have to. It's not too good. They're Baccala. Baccala. Haysbert?

Haysbert and Bernsten I think are the two holdovers from the original two. Back and Baccala, yeah. Is Major League Two any good? I love Major League Two. I think that's the movie I've seen like once. That was the one I preferred. Well, that's a crazy one.

But that might've just been, it was, I actually kind of prefer it too. Why? It was even more regular rotation on Comedy Central. I saw it so many more times. Truly, I have cried at Major League Two many, many times. I like the arc of Wild Thing trying to go normal. Yeah. And I find the moment at the end where he goes full Wild Thing

and then very stirring. Well, then I think we need to watch Major League this year. Great, then we'll do Major League. Yeah, number nine, Rain Man, which has been in the box office for like six months. Right, the highest grossing film of the year before. I think so. It's still out. And then number 10 of the box office

is a movie called Scandal. It looks like a sort of erotic British, oh no, it's a British, it's about the Profumo affair, very famous British sex scandal. Stars John Hurt and Joanne Wally, the wife of Val Kilmer, as Christine Keillor. That's the box office game. We're done with Indiana Jones' Last Crusade.

Our guest had to leave. Yeah, box full of Fisto. With a box full of Fisto. I have a pie from Chris. Yeah, box full of Fisto. With a box full of Fisto. I have a pie from Chris. Yeah, he gave you a pie. In celebration of your, I was about to say growing family, but grown family. It has now reached its maximum size.

So tired and hungry. Great, so the episode's over. The episode is over, yeah. I love this movie, thanks you all. Thanks you all for listening. It's a good movie. And it's also, as much as Spielberg, it's time for him to put aside childish things. He then makes two kind of ungainly flawed films before Jurassic Park. Yeah, next week we'll talk about Always, a very weird kind of total miss for him in terms of public, you know, response at the box office and critics and all of it with her friend Richard Lawson returning to the show.

It was kind of his major league too growing up, a movie he watched a weird number of times. And over on the Patreon, we are talking Star Trek, the next generation and the next movie we are talking about is Star Trek Nem and the next movie we are talking about is... Star Trek Nemesis! So we're getting to the end of that. Stuart Baird's Star Trek Nemesis with Tom Hardy as evil.

Should we say what we're doing next after that? Well, we have Galaxy Quest. Oh great, so then we'll save it. But we're doing Galaxy Quest after Nemesis. Great. So like, it's still a few more weeks of that. Cool. Thank you all for listening. And as always, I sent my manager the draft day link. She responded, we'll look into it.

And I just want to on the record say, I predict nothing will ever come of this. You predict they will not look into it. I'm predicting this is the last I hear about it. Blank Check with Griffin and David is hosted by Griffin Newman and David Sims. Our executive producer is me, Ben Hossley. Our creative producer is Marie Bardy Salinas. And our associate producer is AJ McKeon. This show is mixed and edited by AJ McKeon and Alan Smithy.

Research by J.J. Burch. Our theme song is by Lane MontgomeryKeon and Alan Smithy. Research by J.J. Birch. Our theme song is by Lane Montgomery in the Great American Novel, with additional music by Alex Mitchell. Artwork by Joe Bowen, Ollie Moss, and Pat Reynolds. Our production assistant is Minick. Special thanks to David Cho, Jordan Fish,

and Nate Patterson for their production help. Head over to blankcheckpod.com for links to all of the real nerdy shit. Join our Patreon, BlankCheck Special Features, for exclusive franchise commentaries and bonus episodes. Follow us on social at BlankCheckPod. Subscribe to our weekly newsletter, Checkbook, on Substack. This podcast is created and produced by BlankCheck Productions.