Blank Check with Griffin & David - Near Dark with Mani Lazic

Episode Date: September 24, 2017

Mani Lazic (Little White Lies) joins Griffin and David to discuss 1987’s western meets vampire thriller, Near Dark. But why is this film out of print? Can a normal blood transfusion heal a person of vampire? Is this movie very sexy? Together they examine Bigelow’s stylistic choices, James Le Gros’ career and honor Bill Paxton. Plus, United Kingdom shop talk and pitching Transylvania General Hospital.

boy you people sure stay up late. We keep odd podcasts. We keep odd hours. It's a nice short one. Yeah, good. Short. Exactly. Let's just get it over with. That's great.

We did it. And as always, please remember to rate your views on Skype. No, no, no. Not that short. Come on. We can do five minutes. Hi, everybody. My name is Griffin Newman. I'm David Sims.

This is Blank Check with Griffin and David. That's the two of us. We're hashtag the two friends. True. A competitive advantage. In podcast. And in life. And in life.

I think so. I think it helps us. Being friends? Yeah. It's helped me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, look, if I didn't have a friend, who would I hang out with? You ever try a one person hangout? It sucks. I do it all the time. try a one-person hangout? It sucks. I do it all the time. Are you kidding me? Me too. It's most of my life. We are both weird,

hermetic, lonely men. Oh boy, oh boy. Yeah, how you doing? I'm doing okay. Very relevant to today's movie. I have to shoot a thing tomorrow morning from when we're recording this episode.

A piece of cinema? A piece of cinema. And I have been keeping very terrible vampire hours. My body has not readjusted since Australia, which has been like three weeks now. That really fucked you over. It fucked me over. I mean, that's rough. Right. I've been purposefully

depriving myself of sleep. Yeah, Griffin lives in yesterday now. I'm trying to's rough. Right. I've been purposefully depriving myself of sleep. Yeah. Griffin like lives in yesterday now or whatever. I'm trying to make myself overtired. You'll fall asleep tonight. Right. That's your plan. Right. But that's fucks me up.

You see, I used to do this in college. Yes. Where I would sleep later and later. And then I'm like, my sleep schedule would suddenly be like, I go to bed at 8 a.m. and wake up at 4 p.m. And I'd be like, well, this is a disaster. So I'll just stay up for 36 hours. Yes.

And but then what would happen is your body would just go insane.m. and I'd be like well this is a disaster so I'll just stay up for 36 hours. Yes. But then what would happen is your body would just go insane and you would fall asleep at 10 p.m. and like wake up at 2 a.m. and your body would be like you don't need sleep anymore right? Because you haven't been sleeping so I'm waking you up. Yeah that's how I feel. I mean I've been dealing with one form of insanity for three weeks. I'm trying to just

see at the very least if I can move to a lateral form of insanity. But I walk into the studio, leather jacket, sunglasses, face half charred. Yeah, he's got his Duncan. Right. But no, but I feel like a vampire is my point, David. I feel like a vampire. I get it.

Which is relevant because this is a podcast about filmography. Sure. Directors who have massive success early on, and they're issued a series of blank checks. That's true. Sometimes those checks clear. Yeah. Sometimes they bounce, baby.

Turn your phone off. I'm turning it off right now. I'm sorry. I'm really, I'm all over it. But this is a mini-series about the films of Catherine Bigelow. Catherine Bigelow. And what's it called? Pod 19, The Widowcaster.

Of course it is. And we are now at her second film. Yes. The things are starting to come together. The pieces are starting to come together. The pieces are starting to come together. Yeah. And the movie's called Near Dark. Yeah, this was the movie that got her noticed, right?

Right, because, you know, Loveless, she's co-directing it. Sure. It's more of a sort of like artistic experiment. Right. It's a festival movie, but she's making a studio film, a low-budget studio film, the likes of which rarely exist today. It's a DEG film, right? It's not really a studio. Yeah, and

he, I guess, had like an output deal with MGM. He was like a quasi-studio head in the 80s, though. De Laurentiis. But that's this movie. I'm very curious to see what the numbers are like in terms of listenership for this episode, because this movie is almost impossible to watch now. Right, and it's because of that, isn't it?

It's because of the De Laurentiis. Because I was trying to figure out why is this movie so hard to watch, but it's the De Laurentiis thing. Dino! But we're talking about Near Dark today, and we have a great guest. Near Dark, and we have a great guest who obeyed my rule.

Talking before the introduction. We talked about this last week. I know, I have to speak before you introduce me. You must. And you did. And I did. Also a guest taking advantage of our freestanding policy that we will pay first class airfare for any

international... Yeah, that's why I'm here. This is our first international guest. But any guest who's traveling from another place by air. She really called our bluff on this one. Like Fran Hoffner came from Chicago. Amy Nicholson came from LA.

Right. And we put Fran Hoffner on Spirit Airlines and it only cost us like $70. Yeah, well, you know, we're first class is basically just like a slightly bigger seat. Right. Come on. Right. But today's guest stretched the wallet a little bit. Yeah.

Yeah. She is a film critic for Little White Lies. Ladies and gentlemen, Mani Lazak. Hello. Did I pronounce your last name? Mani Lazik. Lazik. Fuck it up.

It was one or the other. Mani Lazik is the actual real way of saying it. Okay. But that's fine. I shoplifted Little White Lies once when I was in college. That's a good one to do. By mistake. That's fine.

Well, sort of by mistake. But David, how would you have been able to shoplift that? That's a magazine that's published in England that's true I grew up in England I don't know if you know that about me

you grew up in England never heard that one before no never does FOP still exist yes it's still there shit

wow you mean the archetype or that still exists no it is FOPs still exist yeah FOPs are still around FOP is a indie music it used Fops are still around Fop is a

indie music it used to be like a record store it's a record store they also sell books and DVDs and Blu-rays and it's kind of a miracle

they still exist I think I can't believe they still exist that's nuts it's like five pound DVDs and right and I used to go to Fop

all the time and I was in Fop once and I was looking at this brand new magazine called like it was when it was first launching

yeah I think Bad Education was on the cover the Amotevar movie oh yeah and I just walked out with it

like I didn't buy anything and I just walked out with it and I walked like four blocks and I realized like wait I never paid for this thing like you know

no one stopped me anyway so like accidental shoplifting yeah no it wasn't it wasn't very malicious it's okay now you mention it

on your podcast like you're paying back it's fine if they want to come after me I'll pay them whatever the cover price was

do you know how much they're going to boost their listenership with this episode I'm trying I'm trying was Fop like or is

I guess it still exists like the Kim's video of London yeah but it came later like Fop launched when I was in college. Like, it was sort of just like they were trying to be like, what if, you know, Virgin Megastore or whatever was like a little cooler and a little more indie, you know? And at least in London it worked.

I guess it still works. Yeah. Yeah. Fop. It was kind of like, what if Amoeba Records had branches all over the city? Gotcha. You know, like that kind of thing. But not as good as that.

Right. Right. Because Kim's video closing felt like a watershed moment in the death of a certain kind of New York. For sure. Kim's video is a very special New York thing. IMO. And Amoeba's like allegedly dangling by a thread these days, right? I don't like hearing that.

I don't either. I mean, that's obviously a big chunk of real estate. That's a California thing. This has been Shop Talk, where we literally talk about shops. Does HMV still exist? I think it closed recently, actually. I used to go to HMV all the time. Clack, clack, clack, clack, clack.

That's me going through CDs. Clack, clack, clack. Remember that? Yeah. I went to high school in Brooklyn, and I had a friend. I grew up... No London. Yeah, right. That's what I had a friend I grew up no London yeah right that's what I'm saying

yeah I'm judging you but my friend and I lived in the West Village so we'd take the subway together my friend Spike and I

well no after school Spike Jones it was Spike Jones the filmmaker he had a in a weird Billy Madison style twist

they wouldn't give him financing for adaptation unless he went back to school right because it turned out he had never graduated

okay so you're saying it's like never been kissed that's my sweaty bit I'm doing right now whatever I don't I'm not sleeping

yeah forget about that one right forget about it forget it Ben cut it record it

make it it's own new podcast start a network forget it record it make it it's own new podcast start a network around it make it a spin off what's up emergency mini so just that joke

but we would go to the virgin mega store and do the clack clack clack I don't want to brag but we do some clack clack clacking and would get angry

when like movies we owned on DVD had been re-released with new cover art. Yeah, with a better DVD. If it was better, we'd begrudgingly upgrade. We'd double dip. But if it was just like, fuck, now the Terminator has a lenticular cover.

That's petty as hell. You're right, it was petty as hell. I had some flipper DVDs from like way back in the day and I remember yeah the new one would come out and you'd be like alright

and was it Warner Brothers that had the little the cardboard case the cardboard case with the Warner Brothers was shitting the bed the first three years

of DVD because it was those cardboard cases and the flipper discs and they were just they weren't making it easy for you yeah

yeah I agree if I can talk about another shop please because we're talking about shops there are those second hand DVD

shops in the UK called CEX actually I realized recently I used to go to CDX all the time but actually

I found out recently that it's supposed to be pronounced sex and I'm like come on wait what yeah

I was like no it's a C you have to say all the letters otherwise it's weird so anyways because have to say all the letters. Otherwise, it's weird. So anyways. Because it was computer exchange, I think, was where it first came from.

Probably. I used to go there and buy like old Nintendo games as well. You know, like they would just have a bunch of like random secondhand crap. You know, it's sort of like a pawn shop for teens. Yeah. And so like almost like every... And there was a Wi-Fi in one of the shops called the Safe CES. The Wi-Fi. Yeah. And so like almost like every six and there was a wifi in one of the shops called the safe CS. The wifi.

Anyways. And my sister and her boyfriend. So my sister, Elena Lasek, he Lasek on Twitter, also a film critic and her boyfriend, Paul Reed. Uh,

he's my battle away. That's my joke about him at Toronto. Yeah. Because Paul Rudd, Paul Reed. Anyways. Uh, he plays art man.

So anyways, uh anyways one letter away one consonant away what they do almost every weekend is that they walk to the CX in Camden and they buy

like 15 shitty movies on DVD and then they watch them and it's really fun it is fun sometimes it's good movies but many times

it's just really bad movies and it's really fun I got a shop yeah that I love that's from the UK Rough Trade oh yeah

yes in Williamsburg I like listening to vinyl and so I go and I spend way too much money you can spend so much money at those places it's crazy

yeah where you're like no I need this Yes album I know it's $18 but come on not Yes I love Yes look I'm just saying what I like at those places. It's crazy. Where you're like, no, I need this Yes album. I know it's $18, but come on, not Yes. I love Yes.

Look, I'm just saying what I like. That's fine. That's fine. Go on. That shop opened pretty recently and it feels like anomalous that a new place

like that sprung up, but then it's also so telling that it has to be a venue as well. Right. It's clearly bankrolled by the fact that they're able to do shows there.

Yeah. Like I bet the liquor pays for them having a brick and mortar record shop. Oh, for sure. They also do like art installations. Yes. And the space too. Yeah. Like monthly, which is really cool.

We recorded a podcast there once. Oh my God. Yes. That was a mess. TCGS after God. Yes. That was a mess. TCGS After Party. Yeah. But I actually purchased a Kramps album. Sure.

Which is featured in the movie we're talking about today. Hey. Near Dark. Look at that. Right back on the tracks. Thank you, Ben. Thank you, Producer Ben. Thank you, Purdue or Ben.

We're right back on the tracks. We can go on with our episode, Poet Laureate. Thank you, Haas. Let's get straight to our talk, The Peeper. Hey, you're welcome. We're right back on the tracks. We can go on with our episode, Poet Laureate. Thank you, Haas. Let's get straight to our talk, the peeper. Hey, you're welcome. Just checking my email. Let's keep this episode moving. Sure.

The tiebreaker. Yeah. I mean, if you need me to settle something, I can do that. By all means, keep talking, Ben. We're talking about the film, Near Dark, Birthday Benny. Well, it was in June, but yeah, you can wish me a birthday. Yeah, sure. Thanks.

You can wish you a birthday. Is that what you say, right? Yeah, that's what you say. me a birthday. Yeah, sure. Thanks. You can wish you a birthday. Is that what you say, right? Yeah, that's what you say. Hey, birthday. Hey, birthday. Hey, birthday to you. Yeah. Happy birthday to the meat lover.

Oh, okay. Any more? Well, I just think- Are we just going to call it quits there? No, I think it's important that we talk- We're here to talk about a movie. It's important that we talk about Near Dark. And it's also important that we acknowledge who's graduated to certain titles

over the course of different miniseries. I agree. Such as producer Ben Kenobi, Kylo Ben, Ben Sate, Ben Knight Shyamalan, Save Anything, Yelie Ben's with a dollar sign,

Warhaz, and Purdue Urbane. These are important things. I think so too. These are important things. How do you even remember these? I forget half of them. He forgets them all the time.

But honestly, he's the one who does it. I mean, credit to Griffin. He's, you know, the mantle is on him to remember, he's the one who does it. Credit to Griffin. The mantle is on him to remember these fucking names, and he does it. Yeah, I also, I mean, most of my rent is paid for by remembering words.

True, true. It's a good job. Yeah. My rent's paid for by writing words. But do you ever remember them? I ask you. So rarely. In fact, I usually repeat them constantly within the same article.

And then they just point it out to me later. They're like, David, you said the word blunt eight times in this today. And I was like, yeah, well. Yeah, I read some hacky review of yours recently. You used the word and like 75 times. I know. I really lean on that one. Yeah.

Oh, boy. It's a writer's thing. You would understand. Okay. I'm getting writer Trump. So this is Catherine Bigelow's second movie. It comes out a good handful of years after The Loveless, but The Loveless had an extended birthing process

because it was doing a long retitling film festival circuit. Yeah, and also The Loveless made no money. So I'm sure she was sort of hunting around, scraping for bucks. What's it calling card? Yeah. She starts developing a screenplay, which she wants to make a genre movie,

a slightly more commercial film. And she really wanted to make a Western. Yes. She wanted to make a Western. Go on, sir. Riding a western with her buddy. Eric Red. Good name.

Who wrote The Hitcher. Sure. For this, which was his college thesis. Okay. And it got turned into a fucking great movie with Rutger Hauer. Yeah. That I love. And his name is Eric Red, which is a very Scandinavian mythic name to have

and he's a guy and he's Aunt Mont he's a couple letters away from Paul Rudd so I had to change it more he later writes Blue Steel again with Catherine Bigelow he wrote Undertow writes Blue Steel again with Catherine Bigelow.

That's a bad idea. He wrote Undertow, that 90s TV movie that she made with fucking Lou Diamond Phillips and Charles Dance. I didn't know that was a thing. It's a thing alright, my friend. It's a fuzzy script with amateurish direction according to a TV guide.

How did Lou get the nickname Diamond? I don't know, man, because he's a badass. That's how. Well, growing up originally, he was Lou Cole Phillips. And then years of high pressure. That's just not funny. Two comedy points. That is funny. I will fight you to the end

of the earth on that. That is a good joke. I may be delirious right now. Apparently. But I'm Eddie Murphy delirious. Lou apparently but i'm eddie murphy delirious diamond was named after a war hero called lou diamond that was his name lou diamond his name was actually james diamond that's crazy so diamonds real but lou isn't right and then his father died and he took his stepfather's surname phillips as well wait Diamond's the only part of his name that is real? Diamond's the real part. Yes.

Isn't that bonkers? Good for Lou Diamond Phillips. I mean, I'd hold on to it too. This is not, we've talked about Lou Diamond Phillips two episodes in a row. Yeah, and we're going to talk about James LeGrow. We're going to, there's some, oh, we're going to talk about, well, I don't want to spoil it actually. I don't want to spoil it. So I'm very excited.

I'm very excited about someone else we're going to talk about. Wow. Who's just like, seems to have taken over my life. Dramatic tease. Man, I'm not spoiling anything. Okay. So she's trying to make this Western happen. Sure.

And everyone goes, dead genre. Yeah, not cool. This is the 80s, baby. Right. The 80s are about vampires. Right. So she goes, I got to mash it up. Because in 85, you got Fright Night. Yes. Vamp baby. Right. The 80s are about vampires. Right. So she goes, I got to mash it up. Because in 85, you got Fright Night.

Yes. Vampires. Right. And there was another one. Lost Boys. In 87, you got The Lost Boys, which comes out right before Near Dark. So I refuse to accept. But maybe they knew that was coming and that it was going to be a big movie.

Sure. Because that was a big movie. It was probably like they might have read some announcement. It was a big-ish movie. It was a major cult movie. I liked The Lost Boys. It had big stars in it, though. Huge, huge stars.

Jason Patrick. Alex Winter. She throws some vampire in the mix. She essentially decides to reinterpret both the Western and the vampire. Because she loves to play with genre. Because she loves to play with genre. She does like to play with genre. Now, here's what I was very fascinated by watching this movie.

I think to some degree this movie plays like a remake of The Loveless. A little bit, yeah. I mean, it's about a bunch of bad boys rolling through town. Right. It's this sort of destructive cloud of male ego unchecked. But there's also a bad girl. Right, but she's kind of like, she's hanging in the balance a little bit. She seems a little less bad than them.

Yeah, but she makes, what's his name, a vampire? Yeah, I agree. Unprompted. I agree, dick move. Yeah, that wasn't cool. Dick move. But the big kind of centerpiece of this movie is them holding this bar hostage which is very similar

to the centerpiece of the Loveless and I think notably during that whole section she just kind of disappears into the background. Yeah. Sure.

You know there's like a 15 minute section where you're like oh right she's in this movie because you're mostly watching the boys rip it up draw some blood.

And when she like goes for a victim she goes like seduction mode and then she like goes for a victim she goes like seduction mode yes and then she lets the other guy like pursue him

so she's kind of not playing it completely and she's helpful she's nice to Paz Darwin he's like I don't want to kill people

she seems to have a conscience in the way the others don't well especially you know Paxton who's the now this movie shares three cast members with aliens

right which came out the year before can you name them yes they're Jeanette Goldstein yes Lance Henriksen and Bill Paxton

my three best friends in the world exactly the three great people and and she knew Cameron right around now and then later Mary right

but they're starting to hang out yes so James Cameron so there's So there's obviously There's some sort of intertwining of like He said like, hey I built a rep company here If you want to borrow them for a weekend

And she gets $5 million And the movie Made less than that when it came out Made $3.4 million But like very quickly Grew Sure, I mean became like a sort of made 3.4 million dollars but like very very quickly grew sure I mean became like

a sort of well regarded cult hit of the 80s yes I agree it feels very ahead of its time yes

it also has one of the best posters of all time agreed I think but like everything about this movie screams like

comic con to me now sure yeah in the sort of obsession with taking like different genres and coming up with like very kind of everyday iconographic images and outfits and all that sort of stuff you know yeah that's true yeah the archetypes within it i mean it feels like this like totally predates preacher yeah you know which has like a very similar kind of sensibility yeah i'm trying to think of like other genre western like how much of a thing was that before you know where it's like x genre plus

western right cowboy versus aliens yeah well the greatest i mean that it all leads up to cowboys versus yeah that's right it all came together this is the beginning of the you know the snake and cowboy versus aliens is the i don't know um. There's Bone Hammer or, or Bone Tomahawk? Tomahawk. That movie's just like, what if some white guys got eaten? Right. And cut into pieces.

The mashups of genres in that movie are Western and racism. Those are the two genres that are being put together. Racism movies are my favorite genre. They're really, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. And you know, there's kind of that thing where like people go like, well, racism movies are meant for kids. Like, is it kind of infantilizing to watch racism movies? But I think when the craft is there, it's not. Right. What was I going to say?

The Wikipedia page cites two previous vampire western movies. Curse of the Undead and Billy the Kid vs. Dracula. Right. So those both sound like we have a weekend. Let's make something. Slap some fangs in a cowboy hat together. Billy the Kid versus Dracula looks like a lot of fun. John Carradine played Dracula in it.

That sounds amazing. It was directed by, I can't pronounce this, Orson Welles? No. William Bodine. Okay. Who churned out many a movie, many a picture. Many a picture. I mean, this guy's filmography is so in depth it has to be numbered into decades

yeah his quote I want to read this now these films are going to be made regardless of who directs them there's a market for them and the studios are going to continue to make them I've been doing this long enough I think I can make them as good

or better than anyone else. Very sort of stoic. His last movie was Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter. So he never really gave up on the old mashup. Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter? He couldn't meet Frankenstein? I also hope it's

Dr. Frankenstein's Daughter and not the monster's daughter. Yeah yeah it's just a woman it's like my dad was a scientist i'm more into like the arts this is pretty great you're right it knows yes really that's what it's about oh my god sometime in the 1880s dr frankenstein's evil daughter maria has moved to the american west in order to use prairie lightning storms in her experiments on immigrant children snatched from a dying town and she swaps out their brains

with artificial brains that's nuts that sounds great I would totally watch that and Jesse James meets her? how does he fit into this? apparently two gunslingers come to town Jesse James who has survived his reported killing in

1882 of course uh which the film addresses and uh so this is a sequel to the assassination of jesse james it seems like they don't meet for quite a while uh you know like the the confrontation comes like sort of in the last act of the movie so it's just sort of parallel she's doing bad shit he's riding into town you know there's some movie. So it's just sort of parallel narrative. She's doing bad shit. He's riding into town. You know, there's some business. I mean, it's all of 83 minutes long. They just bump into each other in the street one day and it's like, oops.

Sorry. And then they go their different ways. End of film. They just meet very, very quickly. The tagline is, Roaring Guns Against Raging Monster. So it's his last movie. That sounds wonderful.

So this is near dark. Not exactly the same as this movie. I just mentioned. No, no. Pretty bold still. Right. In terms of mixing genre. Yeah.

And just felt like an evolution of her trying to take all the themes she was interested in with The Loveless and put it into a more entertaining film. But it is a film with its own weird, like... So this is what I find interesting about this movie. Once he gets turned, and he gets turned very quickly. Very early on.

Right? It's just sort of this chance meeting. And it's not a long movie. It's like an hour and a half. Yeah. Once he gets turned, the movie just sort of becomes like, this guy spends some time with vampires. You know?

Yeah, and they're basically just like evil drifters. On the road with vampires. And there is this sort of like, you know, narrative, you know, this hanging axe of like the dad's trying to find the son. Sure. They're coming after them, right? At some point, these two roads are gonna cross. But the movie just sort of like lets you live with these vampires for a while.

And just like see how they live, explore like the ins and outs of like their daily routine and how their culture works, you know, their workarounds, their own weaknesses and all that sort of stuff. But the thing she really injects

in the movie, which I don't think exists in The Loveless, and then becomes a cornerstone of her career, I think her single strongest asset as a filmmaker is her ability to build tension. This movie has a lot of tension because every scene is playing off of this, like, are the

vampires going to go buck wild? We know what vampires do. They go are the vampires gonna go buck wild we know what vampires do they go buck wild they go buck wild Manu how did you feel about this movie I really liked it yeah I had seen it before and I rewatched it for this and yeah I think it's like it's really

atmospheric but not in a like whimsical way like it's atmospheric because of the music and the way it's shot there's a lot of slow-mo music Tantric Dream music is incredible great Tantric Dream score yes

but I think it's atmospheric also for what you said like it really builds tension and it really paints those characters as like real characters like really complex and they like

they keep like kind of fighting in each other even when they belong to the same group so yeah there's like

a lot of there's like a real bad vibe throughout. Yeah, that's the big love list for me is that she wants you to spend time with people who make you uncomfortable. She likes to make movies about assholes. Right. Even when you like the assholes. And it's this sort of multi-character study that doesn't really have

very clear narrative stakes but each scene has its own internal tension to it, which is kind of interesting. Yes. And then she just like hones that sense of tension every film from here on out. I also sort of noticed that there's a lot of punk-esque characters,

which I think is so cool because she, I feel like has done well with portraying those types. Whereas like other times they just are so caricatures. It's just, like, people have no idea about that subculture trying to represent it. And that's the other thing. I'm not going to keep on hitting this thing relentlessly. That's the other big overlap with this. And the loveless for me is, like, she's using punks who are kind of, like, the greasers of this time period.

And she's depicting vampires rather than being like monsters as like a weird counterculture like a creepy counterculture and then heightening that by like also they're gonna slit your throat

and that's what she does then with Point Break as well like with the surfers they are a counterculture the most menacing culture we have so that becomes

like a more gentle culture and then it turns out to be menacing no but that's true they're very much like in Point Break they're very much like in Point Break they're very much against like

the establishment and stuff and she really like always depicts those groups as like a family and in I haven't seen

The Loveless but in Near Dark it really feels like a family and a family that like you know

there's like the mom and dad kind of like the two like the old guy yeah Anderson and Goldstein yeah they're like the mom and dad and there's guy. Yeah, Anderson and Goldstein. They're the mom and dad, and there's the younger one.

He says, you don't know what it's like to be a grown-up in the body of a child. A weird kid. But he's still a kid. That character's so good. Isn't that always the best kind of vampire character? The Andy Milonakis vampire. Right, the Kirsten Dunstan in the vampire right yeah

like the eternal child yeah right I just like that he has such a chip on Ish Holden yeah sure and that he's also

such a little shit he's a little shit he keeps on using the fact that he's a kid in really abusive ways and then what's his name Bill Paxton is

the like the wayward you know sort of wild card child yeah like the rebel yeah kid he's so good so much fun this is the first time The wayward, you know, sort of wild card child. Yeah. The rebel kid. He's so good. He's in trouble. So much fun.

This is the first time we've had to talk about Paxton since he died. Is that true? Yeah. I think. Because we did our whole Cameron series and Paxton kept on coming up. And he died very shortly after that. I feel like he died right around when our dumb episode about the fucking titanic documentary that he's in dropped i didn't remember after that maybe but i remember we like spotlighted

of this year how great he was in that documentary he's fucking fantastic um and then uh yeah i i got so sad watching him in this movie just because I was reminded of this thing this quality I think he had which like he always looked like he was having so much fun in movies right without like destroying the movie

you get such a like pure sense of joy from him and I don't know how many people I feel that way about now I don't think that's like essential to being a good actor but he had this unique quality where it was just like

god good for Bill he's having a good time yeah he just loved his job. He loved his job. You get the sense that he just was so happy I get to play a vampire and wear the leather jacket. This is early in his career.

He's popping up all through the 80s and he's the punk in The Terminator. I feel like Aliens is his first big role. This is the year after that. Right. Yeah. But he doesn't really, you know, hit.

I feel like until True Lies, right? Well, then Twister's the first time they actually put him at the center of something. Twister and Apollo 13. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like, yes. But like, yeah, I guess he's in Predator 2. That is such an amazing filmography.

He's in One False Move. Which he's the star of. And that's a cool movie yeah Trespass yeah hey man he's the star of that too so he's been

okay alright yeah but like in In the Dark he's playing such a loud person but he doesn't feel like he's just doing it because he wants to have fun yeah

it doesn't it really fits with the story it never seems like he's chewing scenery which I think is the biggest compliment I could give about him in this movie

I don't know what other actor could have played this part like this and not be super annoying sure well I think the key

to it is the having fun thing because these guys are just like these vampires in the movie are just like hedonists

they just live for the sake of living and do whatever they want like bikers like cowboys sake of living and do whatever they want like bikers like cowboys right like many uh yeah right and so you need like for that character you need someone who you're really seeing the enjoyment in that lifestyle rather than it just being cruel right you know um but that's that's the weird thing this movie does, is it weirdly humanizes the vampires by spending that much time with them, even though it kind of refuses to give them a central humanity. But it makes their lifestyle so seductive.

It looks amazing. It looks like so much fun. Especially in contrast to the farm family life that the main character has. That looks super boring. But being a vampire looks so cool. Being a vampire, you just blow up stuff. You burn the cars you use. And you just move on.

And you go anywhere else. And you'll never die unless the sun touches you. Because this is one of the rare vampire movies that isn't a horror movie at all. Like it has horror elements. No, but it's not a horror movie. Right. There's not a lot of... Yeah.

I saw some reviews saying it's like one of the best horror movies of the 80s. It's not a horror movie. At all. It just has like horror elements. You could call it a western. Right.

And yeah, I guess you could sort of call it a thriller. Like it's kind of a very low-key thriller. Yeah. I mean, it has a lot of like bloody moments

like really intense the last 20 minutes there's more going on you know and like the bar thing like is really intense like the scene that's a good scene

yeah amazing scene and you know a car blows up like there's some shit that happens a truck a car

yeah a truck sure people blow up too yeah it's cool. This movie essentially starts with what would be the final scene of a horror movie.

What, him getting turned? Yeah. Or they'd stretch that thing out much longer. Vampire films. Oh, there's too many. Yeah, it's a robust genre. But I'm trying to figure out where this was

in the like sort of in the vampire movie apart from yes sure Fright Night had come out which is a great movie

I love Fright Night I do too but like what else like The Hunger is not that long before which is a very different yeah lesbian vampires

with Deneuve is that yeah yeah and Susan Sarandon it's more She's a very different. Yeah. Lesbian vampires. With Deneuve. Is that? Yeah. Yeah. And Susan Sarandon. It's more of an erotic vampire thriller. Right.

But I feel like Neoduck is super erotic too. Yes. Yes. When she first gives him her hand, that's insane. I can't believe that passed. It's pretty intense. Yeah. So, yeah that passed it's pretty intense so yeah but it's cool

it's like you can't make a vampire movie and not like draw the comparison between sex and vampirism like that's that's just what it's about

right it's an inherently right that's always been that's what fucking Bram Stoker's getting at right like Dracula's a hedonist

he's got all his ladies exactly there's that whole thing that like all the kind of like classic iconic monsters each represent like a different basic elemental human fear.

You know? Sure. And like vampires are sexuality and like the wolf man is sort of like you know the evil within us. And Frankenstein is like fear of death and like all that sort of stuff. Like that's the whole thing it's tapping into. But that's like a thing.

She's playing with so many different types of tension in this movie without being a horror movie where it's like it's the sexual tension of that. It's the comedic tension of like the dark humor and sort of the fun they're having with these things. It's the tension of when they're going to burst because it's a lot of slow burn stuff before. You get these bursts that are very violent, but they're kind of spread apart. You know, you got Coppola's Dracula. That's later. In 92.

I'm trying to see what came after this. Obviously, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the movie comes out in 92, which is trying as well to merge genres. And it's bad at it. And it's bad at it. The movie is bad at it. I feel like a lot of just sort of like the vampire lifestyle

rules that this movie establishes are like a lot of the things that are being used in what we do in the shadows. I've never seen that movie. Oh, it's so good. People like it right because I've seen

you know shit Scott Rail what the fuck's it called Boy Hunt for the Boulder People yeah I miss that one

oh that one's so cute yeah that one's great it's great it's a good little movie yeah what we do in the shadows I think is the best movie I know what you mean

it's like very much like how do they live every day? How do they make it work? They have to kill people, but also it sucks to kill people. But anyway, they have to do it. That overlap is big because you're just spending so much time with these people. It's just the sort of like… The world-building stuff.

The bit with him eating the chocolate bar and it's like, oh, fuck, they have to eat blood. There's no other option. What we do in the shadows gets a lot of mileage out of that. I just think they do a lot of, like, sort of very pragmatic, like, answering of, like, filling in the gaps in vampire mythology. All the questions you've ever

wanted to ask about vampires. Like, Buffy does that. True Blood did that. Like, there are so many TV shows that have, like, dug into, like, yeah, what if vampires day to day. But this comes earlier. It does.

That's what I'm saying. I think she likes. Well, look. Come on. The first one, as we said, is I already forgot the name of it. Like Jesse James Meade. Billy the Kid. That was the beginning of wondering what is Dracula's life like day to day?

Has he ever hung out with Billy the Kid? They were the original two friends. The West's deadliest gunfighter, the world's most diabolical killer. That's the headline for that one. That isn't how I would describe Dracula if given three chances. What,

the world's most diabolical killer? Yeah, I'd choose different words. Yeah, I don't know. Things to say about him. I mean, he's definitely like

the most diabolical, like, landowner. You know what I mean? Like, most diabolical, like, baron. know what I mean? Like most diabolical, like Baron. Sure.

Uh, other than Baron Trump. But I mean, the thing about Dracula that I love, the thing about Dracula that I love, I mean, not that this is a Dracula movie, obviously this is a vampire movie,

but like Dracula is like, yeah, I do like to eat people suck, you know, suck their blood, uh, sleep in a cup, but like, come like yeah I do like to eat people suck you know suck their blood sleep in a cup but like come to me you know

I'm not gonna like go to you and like you can come to my house you know and then like I'll lay it on and we'll have dinner

and then I'll fucking eat your neck right Dracula's whole strategy was like let me just have the best house of all time right a house that's so fucking weird

that people just gotta come see it. That works because then nobody comes out, no one finds them. Whereas in Near Dark, they have to roam the streets and then they get chased by police. They get blown the fuck up. And a mobile home is no home. I mean, this is

no life they're living. Going from motel to motel. So what's the plot of this movie? It doesn't really happen. You got Caleb Colton played by Adrian Pasdar who had been in Top Gun. Okay, right. In a tiny role. But I guess who's, you know, I mean, what do you think of Adrian Pasdar?

He kind of looks like Frankenstein. He's got this sort of baby handsome face. But it's all weird and elongated. Sure. And very square. He looks a bit like Jack Gyllenhaal. I think, like in Brokeback because also he's dressed

like a cowboy sure yes he has a bit of he has the eyebrows he's handsome yeah I don't know

I mean what do you think of Pazdar in general because he was I mean I think of him as two different things I think of him as like you know

pretty 80s Pazdar and then heroes yeah the show Prophet sure which was like the the like ur text for the later breaking bad sopranos whatever like the idea of like what if we made a show about a bad person you know like but when that came out in 95 everyone was like what is this

and he like sleeps naked in a box and he like you know do you remember this show? No, I love it. It sounds way too twisted. It was very twisted. It was about an executive at a multinational conglomerate who will stop at nothing to make money. And his name is Jim Profit. Is his name? Yeah, this is a good show to be clear. He was born to make profit. It was on Fox.

He talks to the audience and he basically just like does all kinds of insane shit and it's like House of Cards sleeps as he did

as a child which is curled up in a shipping box naked this show aired like one episode and Fox was like

excuse me no no and it was immediately cancelled so he didn't make any profits. No, he did not. Five comedy points.

Only five episodes were broadcast before Fox cancelled it. That's not so bad. It was protested all over the United States from the usual suspects. From big shipping box who didn't like their depiction. Sure. And it was created by

David Greenwalt, who then went on to create the TV show Angel, another vampire TV show with Jasmine. You know where Adrian Pasdar's bread is mostly buttered these days, right? You tell me. Weird fact about him, he is the guy

who voices Iron Man in everything. I knew that, actually, yes. In all the cartoons, the Avengers cartoons. In video games and everything. Every other depiction of Iron Man in everything. I knew that actually. Yes. In all the like cartoons and video games and everything. Yes. Every other depiction of Iron Man essentially is Adrian Pazder. He does a lot of voices. He's got a nice voice. He does. Yeah. But now it's like it's weird because he was doing like

Iron Man cartoons before the movie came out and he's retained the job but they clearly push him towards like Downey Jr. now. Right. So he's got a dude like Downey Jr. jazzy, like kind of like, oh, interesting. Sure, right. That's harder to rip off.

Yeah, yeah. He also directed a film called Cement in 2000, starring the extremely bankable Chris Penn. Wow. He's also married to a Dixie chick. Is that right? Yeah. We really had fun with Adrian Pasdar.

No, they're divorced. Ooh. Or they broke up sad I'm sorry to say Natalie Maines they were married for 17 years but in July this July

they divorced wow sorry you want to hear a crazy story that's completely off topic yes

yes of course sorry I appreciate your support. No worries. The there was I think a fourth member of the Dixie Chicks

who fell in love and left the band. She was like the backbeat of the Dixie Chicks. She was either replaced or they used to have four. Well, there are only three Dixie Chicks.

Right. I can't remember if she was one of the three or if there were four and they left one and kept going. But she left the band. She married my, like, cousin. Yes, Robin Lynn Macy. Right.

Cousin once removed by marriage or something. Oh, sure. She, like, married into someone who divorced out of my family. Okay. And it was was like, that was always the thing of like, oh, can you believe it? Like, she could have been a Dixie chick. And then she got the plague.

She got the plague? Yes. Like, did she die? No, she survived. Like, the disease of the plague. I believe I'm not confusing this. I believe she got the plague. There's no mention of her getting the plague on Wikipedia, but that's not, you know. No one has the plague

now. They were the first people to get the plague. This couple, they went, like, vacationing and they got the plague, and they were the first people in America to get the plague in, like, 40 years. It does, once in a while, pop back up, though, the plague. Usually not in America, obviously. Wow. But, you know, it's a bacterial infection. Oh, you don't like

looking at the plague right now? It's fun. Sorry, buddy. The plague. You know, you know, it's a bacterial infection. Oh, you don't like looking at the plague right now? It's fun. Sorry, buddy. The plague. You know, you got the little weird bumps. So this movie starts just like looking like

like Urban Cowboy or something. It's just sort of like dramatic, atmosy, tangerine dream, cowboy, trucker

kind of stuff. The shot when he first sees her is so beautiful. It's like kind of I think it's slow-mo maybe it's just her the way she acts because in that film

she's so I don't remember her name but her name is Jenny Wright yeah she's so she's so like whimsical and like just like

all over the place and never really there but the way she moves is so weird and captivating she's like a like I don't know

like she makes me think of a butterfly and when he sees her I don't know she makes me think of a butterfly and when he sees her I don't know if it's slow-mo if it's just the way she moves but she's so like looking around and he's like

I'm gonna talk to this girl and it's like the music starts there and it's and like the whole like meet up is just drowned in that

atmospheric music and it's like it's very accelerated like it's just like oh they're hitting it off like they barely talk he walks up to her they go ride together you know it's very accelerated like it's just like oh they're hitting it off like they barely talk he walks up to her they go ride

together it's a very like movie meet up like don't need words just connection

it's just a connection and this whole movie is very dark it's near dark but they always kind of like

make her pop in terms of lighting like she's kind of like this like shock of yeah

there's a lot of like chiaroscuro lighting, which is shadows in her face and also stark light. And she's very pale. And it works so well. That was a thing this movie was criticized for at the time, which was like,

oh, so it makes sense this director used to be a painter. She's so obsessed with these compositions of these images and she's not even telling a story. Was that Siskel? Yeah. You recognize my impression. her she's like so obsessed with these composition of these images and she's not even like telling a story yeah was that a was that Siskel yeah you recognize my impression give it a one thumb up my butt that's my Siskel

okay okay sure yeah but that's a you know that's a dumb criticism sorry very dumb movies should look good yeah well right and also it's pretty yeah pretty obvious reflection of what she's going for right right it's not like that's like out of place it's not like it's style for style's sake and also it's a pretty obvious reflection of what she's going for, right? It's not like that's out of place in a vampire movie. It's not like it's style for style's sake, and also it's a heightened genre. Yeah, and he wants to go home with her, I guess,

and she's like, no, and then bites him on the neck. Am I missing anything there? He's driving her to see a horse. That's right, yes. They have a nice little horse adventure. Yeah, and when he first sees sees her he goes to talk to her and he says and she's eating an ice cream

and he says can I have a bite and she's like what it's so funny in retrospect so on the nose but yeah then they go see a horse

I wish there was a scene later where he was like oh I get it now the bite thing I get it I didn't realize you were a vampire at the time

now it's funny yeah and they never say the word vampire in the whole film which I love yeah but also like

also like it's like have you never like heard of the concept of vampires like would you not mention it once sure

you know sure like it's not because you live in the middle of America and you're like a farmer that you don't know what vampires are so maybe you should like

know the word I don't know maybe educate yourself but maybe this is set in a world where vampires are real and thus we don't know about them right you know what I mean it's like set in a world where vampires are real and thus we don't know about them. Right. You know what I mean?

It's like, is this a world without vampire storytelling? Sure. Right. But real vampires. Vampires.

But usually, I mean, like a show like True Blood, they're like, you're a vampire. Where it's like, oh my God,

you're a vampire. Do you do all this stuff? And they're like, yeah, a lot of that stuff's exaggerated, you know, but sure.

I mean, I do drink blood. You have fangs whereas like in this no one seems to recognize the characteristics of a vampire yeah like they just go what the fuck are you but no one ever goes like wait a second vampire right am i right no this is ringing a bell wait a second not creature from the black lagoon what's the other one? You're a vampire. I mean it's very practical in terms of story that no one knows it but it's cool

like it works. Yeah. So you're saying this is set in the world of Dracula Untold where vampire stories have been untold. It's a Dracula Untold that has not been told.

It's a prequel to our culture. This movie takes place before Dracula Untold was made. Yep. Before Twilight before everything else.

Yeah. But it works. Do you know the last time this movie was available on home video This movie takes place before Dracula Untold was made. Yep. Right. Before Twilight. Right. Before everything else. Yeah. Yep. But it works. Do you know the last time this movie was available on home video before the rights got all fucked up? I don't know, like 20 years ago? No. Give me it.

They re-released it like 10 years ago on Blu-ray and DVD where they made the cover just Twilight. Oh, God. They made like- Oh, yes. You're right. Here it is. And this is the one that's like 60 dollars right adrian pastore's face is like stark white yeah it is literally it's literally

like the twilight poster you know like you know it's like sexy right which is crazy because the image of paxton all burned up with the like bullet holes and the sun streaming or the light streaming through him is such a like perfect image right and i remember when i was a kid this movie was in i think you know empire magazine which i've spoken of a lot it was my childhood touchstone for me they used to release these special issues that were like the 50 best blah genre movies and i think near dark's in the action one okay and uh i remember just seeing that image and being like whoa and also being like yeah that's an amazing poster

being like immediately transfixed and like I gotta see this so that's when I saw the movie way back when I think I rented it on VHS hadn't seen it since watched it on my laptop we had to find a legal streaming line I've never done anything illegal in my life

no it's the first time talking about first time ever I was on the plane this one I do love Humblebrag

although we paid for it so yeah so you should be proud Humblebrag that we spent $5,000 wait

to drive to fire from Toronto yeah it was a private jet seriously I forgot to mention that which is a, it was a private jet. Seriously? I forgot to mention that. Which is a good deal on a private jet. And also you had to pay for the film. Right, we had to pay for the film.

We had to pay the license. It was a 35mm print on the plane. We had to buy a projection system and we had to train a steward to use it. And because the flight is so short, you had to actually just drive me around a bit. Yeah, right. They were like, don't land right away.

Maybe circle LaGuardia for half an hour. Thank God Blank Shack got the MacArthur Genius Grant. Otherwise, we would be fucked right now. What if we got, how much did you get for that? A million dollars, right? Let's do it. Yeah, you should try. Because I remember they gave it to Lin-Manuel Miranda last year,

and it was just kind of like, that guy doesn't need, I mean, come on. Yeah. No, it's $625,000. Okay, I mean. Okay, that's not quite enough for a jet, but that's pretty good. It's okay. Paid out in quarterly installments over five years.

Okay. Fine, whatever. Okay. I like how quickly this movie gets through all of that stuff, though. I mean, yes, I agree. She turns in she turns him like minute nine sure it's very fast right yes i think so right and it just sort of is like they have this weird connection we're not going to take the time to do like meet cute awkward banter sort of stuff they like see each other they fall for each other yeah and i like how instead of taking

time in like just uh you know doing a classic meet cute thing it's it's just super weird and poetic because she keeps saying stuff like oh um look at the night like it's deafening you're like what and then she says things like um wait what did she say she says something like the the night is so bright and just really yes that's a great line right early on it's so beautiful where she's talking about the stars and yeah it's like look at this star by the time the light reaches here

I will still be here because I'll be alive forever it's a billion dollars I mean a billion years it's not a billion dollars and the movie almost frames her as like

an angel for the first ten minutes like she has this very ethereal way of moving and the way she's lit and the fact that he's just sort of drawn to her and then she starts

biting them necks hey man he tries to get her to stay out late he thinks it's a curfew issue is that because of your daddy and she's like

right he's also being gross he's gross yeah that's what I love the most that's my favorite thing is how he's like okay I'll drive you

like he stops the car and he's like I'll drive you to your daddy if you like kiss me that's like the least you can do. Then he throws the keys down his shirt. Yeah, and then obviously she kisses him, but then she bites him and he's a fucking vampire

and then he's in pain forever. That's what you get. Yeah, that's what happens when you're gross with girls. Yeah, it's true. It's a good move by her to bite him, but the only problem in my opinion is you bite the guy, then he's like, what do I do? I'm a vampire now.

And you have to like teach him how to be a vampire. It was like a really cool move for her in the moment. And then she's like, oh, fuck. I just like wrote this big like. But at the same time, it means he's going to stay with her forever. It's pretty cool. And he's like at her mercy. Yes.

Yes. Yes. I just wonder. That's what you want at school. Like how quickly. That's the thing. Like being a vampire requires like a really strong sense of commitment. You know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you just really have to think about these circumstances you're creating for yourself. And it's like, you really want to spend the rest of your life with this guy? Yeah. Well, not just the rest of your life. The rest of your time. Right, right. Unless you happen to go outside in the daytime.

Yeah. Very easy to avoid that. Yeah. Vampires vampires vampires. What am I thinking. So very quickly like he's sort of on the

side of the road staggering. Sure. And gets picked up by this RV. Yes. And I like their weird kind of like makeshift

thrift store armor that they have on for like the quick moments they have to like go out into the sunlight. Yeah. It's so good. They think he's just the quick moments they have to like go out into the sunlight yeah it's so good they think he's just

some pathetic fuck they're gonna like drain of blood right and then she's like I got some bad news for you bad news guys and I turned up

uh huh yep so you've got and she's like you can't kill him you have to kill me first and so they're like okay cool

he has to prove himself right Jesse Hooker who is Lance Henriksen he's the one who's like right you got a week to prove you're like, okay, cool, he has to prove himself. Right. Jesse Hooker, who is Lance Henriksen, he's the one who's like, right, you got a week to prove you're a real vampire. Catherine Bigelow, in a move that shows that she's a true artist, said,

I like Lance Henriksen, but can we add more weird lines to his face? And gave him prosthetic scars. The crevices weren't deep enough in his cheeks. What a legend he is. We've talked about him a lot, but he's great. He's kind of like, what if Jonathan Price was like a candle who melted in the sun? You know what I mean?

He looks kind of like 50% Jonathan Price. It's a total compliment. I love him. He's so good. He's great. he's so good he's great and then right so she's helping him along

by having her like drink from her right after she eats something it's like a baby bird kind of like

yeah yeah yeah yeah exactly like the mom like barfing into the bird's mouth yeah but it's a wildly sexual scene sure yeah

in a movie with no sex it's quite sexy it's insanely erotic yeah why won't you make another sexy movie? That's what cinema is so good about it. That's why cinema is good.

You can like make sexy stuff out of the, you know, the limits. Right. Like in Hollywood,

you can't always show sex and so what do you do? You have fucking vampires drinking each other's blood. I mean, this movie is very sexy. The Loveless is, as we all know, the sexiest movie ever made. Point Break is very sexy The Loveless is as we all know

the sexiest movie ever made Point Break is super sexy yeah it's unbelievable sexy but like I feel like she's gotten away from that and why can't she make now she just makes

Detroit is not sexy you know what it's not no it's many things but it's not sexy and like why can't she go back to making something

more heightened like this yeah I would also I would love to see her try to make a genre film again. Sure. Yeah. With her new sort of sensibilities. Right, and I get that she, like, wanted to stop doing that.

That was always her thing. Because there was pinch and holds and all of that. But now that I feel like Detroit flopped and won't get any Oscar attention. And got some pretty problematic reviews. Yeah. It's like, you know, she's got to do something new, right? And the bowl collaboration maybe isn't surviving. Well, I mean, to me, that's the issue.

I agree. But I'd like her to not rip something from the headlines next time, but rip something from the funny books. You want to make a comedy? No, I'm just, funny books, I'm just like, like take some sort of genre tropes and try to marry it to her new sort of like her ethical, like sort of, you know, humanistic.

She's just gotten so political now. She's gotten so political. Yeah, and it's, you know, it's cool to have a woman making really political movies like that and with big budgets and stuff. Yeah, for sure. But she was so good at genre stuff. Great. And her movies have also gotten, like, increasingly literal. And, like, her style of, quote unquote, realism is still a style.

Like, you know, it is a sense of stylization. But she hasn't made a movie that's this heightened. a style. It is a sense of stylization, but she hasn't made a movie that's this heightened. And it would be cool to see her take all of her political concerns and make it more allegorical and try to do something. And throw in parkour.

Yes. Just what needs to make a comeback is parkour. That was my single biggest issue with Detroit was the lack of parkour. Yeah, I agree. That was definitely the issue with that movie. That was the problematic element parkour. No parkour. Yeah, I agree. That was definitely the issue with that movie. That was the problematic element. I mean, she made surfers jumping off planes

look like a thing that makes sense. So why not? I agree. Kathy, let's do it. Let's do it. Make a space movie. I don't know. A space movie.

That's what I would love. I'd love to see her do an original big budget genre film like that. I'd love to see her make a cool space movie. Yeah, I wonder if she'll do it. I don't know. I don't know what she wants to do. It's kind of an exciting point in her career right now. Because it feels like she could zag in any direction.

She kind of reached a point break. These are strange days for her. These are strange days for her. These are strange days for her. I mean, I think the weight of water is bearing down on her shoulders. Maybe she should make the weight of water too. Yeah. Hyper weight. The weight of air?

Yeah, sure. Great. The weight of what to... Very. Okay, I lost many points here. No. No. No.

No. Okay, so near dark. The next thing that happens is the bar scene. But there's a lot of other stuff in between where I feel like

they're just kind of rambling around. Like there's nothing really crucial. It almost like becomes like a tour documentary. You know it's like

you're watching this band on the road. It's about like Leonard Skinner's later. Right. It's like Gimme Shelter with

slightly less murder. More actually. I think an equivalent amount maybe I love the scene where they steal a car like Bill Braxton steals a car and then they abandon

their van and just like set fire to it and there are many beautiful shots of them against the backdrop of the fire and it's really

really hot in that sense it's really good it's very punk the bar is really like the centerpiece of the fire. Yes. It's really, really hot in that sense. It's really good. Yeah. It's very punk. The bar is really like the centerpiece of the movie where you get to see them like fully vamp out. Right.

Yeah. Also, you know the scene where... Maximus is a Spurs. You know when... It's so cool. When Caleb, the main guy, tries to like take a bus back home, he stops in the town

and the cinema is showing aliens. That's right. A aliens. So that's a nice note. I like that whole stretch though where he just like hasn't really processed

what's going on. The refusal of the call if you will. Yes. Yes. Sort of. That's such an interesting scene as well because he's like trying to get help

and people are just like oh you like he has to pay $14 to get the bus and he only has $11 and like no one wants to help him. because he's like trying to get help and people are just like oh you like he has to pay $14 to get the bus and he only has $11 and like no one wants to help him so he really like

are you strung out on like heroin or something and it's like really a critique of how outcasts are so not helped

by the system he is so rejected by society now that like he has no choice but to go back to the vampires like even removing

the like physiological elements of his survival yeah it's like well they might not be great company but they're the only people who are like supporting him at this point yeah so it's a nice like as we were saying it's like a kind of a political point but not as on the nose as she does now yes kind of like a commentary on america and like how i think so yeah i mean which is the classic western thing right like right yeah if you want to identify with the outlaws uh give me a reason and like you sort of yeah it's like america's trash country yeah and he was just asking for help you know i mean i would fucking run away from him he's pale and shaking he looks like he's about to throw up

on you right like he's the kind of kind of guy on a bus when you're like walking down trying to pick your seat. You're like, yeah, not next to him. He gets turned on when he sees that the cop has a gash on his hand. Oh, yeah.

Oh, that's so good. That's a nice touch. It is good. It is good. It's super gross. He's good. He's good, Pastor. He's good in this.

It's kind of the most annoying role because he's like the whiner, but still he's good. Well, and then he just sort of becomes like the audience viewpoint for a good chunk of the movie right like you're just sort of using him as a conduit to like he's your entry point

to be able to watch these people live their life right yeah so he he rejoins them right and then there's this whole bar section where it's just like this powder keg under the table which is like they're gonna eat somebody who are they gonna eat when are they gonna do it and why is this taking so long sure but it's like that's the fun of it for them so especially

Bill Paxton's character he's like for him it's a sport like literally he doesn't he doesn't just want the blood he wants to like emotionally manipulate the people

and it's so good he's so good at it because there's so much passion to what like a vampire is right like it makes sense like rather than just gotta eat someone,

you just sort of drag someone behind a tree. And also, life doesn't have stakes for them anymore. No pun intended. But so it's like, for them, it's the singer, not the song, because it's like, well, we gotta eat people. It doesn't matter. We can burn down the bar.

Nothing's gonna catch us. So let's at least have fun doing it. How are we gonna throw it off doesn't matter we can burn down the bar like nothing's gonna catch us so like let's at least have fun doing it like how are we gonna throw it off the hump and do something different than we did last night yeah it's like a show like they're just showmen it's very performative right and then the kind of game of one-upsmanship of them trying to like I think impress each other by their levels of cruelty

yeah and like the different techniques like everyone has a different technique to seduce people into killing them and it's really really interesting like Bill Paxton is just like

insanely aggressive with people like he just provokes them until they beat him up and and the girl she just like

is like come and dance with me and and they dance and then yeah like they all have different approaches.

And it's the tension that builds in this room is insane. When I first saw that movie, I was so shocked. And I remember so much of it when I rewatched it because it's so traumatizing. Like, right. And it's like the nightmare scenario when you go in a bar.

Yes, it's the nightmare scenario. And you go like, okay, which one are they going to eat? And then when it becomes clear that they're just gonna burn the whole place down they're gonna fucking take down everyone and destroy all evidence like that tension is replaced with just like a weird form of horror like it becomes very morally uncomfortable waiting for hell to happen right because you're just watching a series of executions essentially yeah and james LeGros just stands there, blank-faced, jaw-gave.

He's going to be in Point Break. Is he in anything else of hers? I don't think so. He's in the Point Break remake. Oh, is he? He plays one of the elder FBI agents in that. No, no. He's on the other side of the line.

He's a fucking genius. We'll talk about him in Point Break, but he's a fucking genius. Just, I mean, you know, we'll talk about him in a point and break, but he's a fucking genius. I think James LeGros is like one of the funniest actors alive. Have you ever checked out James LeGros' IMDb profile? Like the bio and stuff? No. Is it one of those weird ones where it looks like it was written by James LeGros? Yeah, and it's just all about the joke of him being like a funnier looking Brad Pitt.

It isn't hard to make James LeGrow bust a gut laughing. Just call him Brad Pitt. So he doesn't get six million a film. I think Brad Pitt gets more than six million a film. Yeah, this seems pretty outdated. Or have his photo air kissed by legions of swooning schoolgirls during recess. What?

Chill out. Take it down a notch, I know. I used to do that all the time. Pictures of Brad Pitt. You would air kiss the photo but if you've caught Legros' quirky personality you may wonder why he's still toiling away

but this Minnesota native two sentences starting with but despite being tight lipped on Pitt Legros will happily chit chat about his career Legros says he isn't very LA though he did live there for a short while

this biography is by Darlene Takagi D Takagi at hotmail.com thank you I love James LeGros

I do too he's been married to Robert Loja's daughter for like 25 years which is awesome that's nice

he's a cool guy who makes a zillion movies. Just works a lot. He is handsome. I just remember him in Girls. He was really good. He's consistently very good

in everything, and he does have this interesting look to him because he's a weirdly goofy kind of handsome. But I feel like back in the day, he used to be often typecast as kind of like a strung out California dude, right? Like he's a point break.

Spacey dolt. Living in oblivion, which is like one of his best performances. Yes. He's that, you know, like the kind of like, you know, like ditzy LA guy. He's very good at playing dumb.

Yes. And doing it sympathetically and empathetically. But I think he's good in everything. I do too. And I just like to shout LA guy. He's very good at playing dumb. Yes. And doing it sympathetically and empathetically. But I think he's good in everything. I do too. And I'd just like to shout him out. He was in Scotland PA. Remember that? With fucking Mark Tierney.

A movie we've referenced weirdly often on this podcast. Yeah, because we referenced it in the Insomnia episode for sure. Yeah. Because that's a Mark Tierney joint. Right. And we definitely referenced it in our Billy Morissette miniseries. Anyway. Anyway.

So he starts to, like, freak out a little bit watching the bar thing break down. Yeah. That's such a great scene. That's, like, the best set piece of the movie. Right? Yes. But largely, he and May are like removed from that you're barely kind of covering them

there's some stuff at the beginning when like Paxton is kind of egging him on there's that thing where he gets him to punch the guy you know start the fight that's Paxton's scene is the bar scene because right they're kind of not into Caleb and then it's when Caleb sort of puts himself

in harm's way later to protect them in the daylight, in that police raid thing. That's when they're like, ah, you're all right. That's when he wins them over. Right. Because there's also, yeah, there's this thread that's been established that Pasdar's dad and his little sister are looking for him. Tim Thomerson

is the dad but just because he's kind of been running away in general it's not even they don't know about the vampire thing no sure

obviously yeah right they're just like that kid spent too much time in a truck uh huh case these days right

kids in their trucks um yeah this kind of was the original monster trucks uh yeah but you know it doesn't have that that certain something that je ne sais quoi

the Creech but that's what makes Bigelow a master filmmaker she knew that audiences were not ready to meet 1987 people were not ready to meet Creech 2017 still not ready to meet Creech so try 30 more years 2047 will we be ready for Creech?

That's the question. I thought you turned your phone off. I didn't turn my iPad off. Complete monster. I'm sorry. I'm getting a new iPhone on Friday. Is it the new iPhone? I guess so.

It's not the X, the one that looks at your face. Is it the 7S, like the one I have that's way too big? The 8, but I'm getting the big one again. I want to get that. But they just give me them you know it's the like upgrade program thing and like I've dropped this phone

and it started to crack and I was like I guess it's time yeah but I regretted getting the big one I like the big one it's way too big but it's too big

like I liked when the whole thing about iPhones was that they were getting smaller and smaller and now boom they're massive here's the secret no case

well yeah but then you break it yeah so I've had it for a year I only broke it just now right but I've never broken any phones

but now I get a new one that's impressive you've never broken a phone no I've only broken like seriously broken a phone once and it was like

freezing cold and I just dropped it on the concrete like face down and it just was obliterated you seriously broke a phone once

but comedically how many times have you broken it well this one, when I broke it, I dropped it. It fell out of my hand, bounced under

Onderdonk Avenue in Queens, and then rolled under a car. And I was like, it was one of those moments where you're like, hmm, I don't know of a way to get this.

Like, this may just not, I may not be able to get the phone. Yeah. And also, like, phone, take it down a notch. You didn't need to break that many times.

Yeah, exactly. It was like, donk, donk. You didn't have to do a whole Jerry Lewis routine. Right. And then I had to get the phone. And also like phone take it down a notch. You didn't need to break that many times. Yeah exactly. You didn't have to do a whole Jerry Lewis routine. Right. And then I had to get a tree branch and I swept it out from under the car. Really? Yeah. Well how else do I get something from under a car? Like it was in the middle of

the car you know. I just love picturing you a very tall man. I am quite tall. Crouched on the streets of Brooklyn holding on to a branch. Queens. Queens. Sorry. I was in Queens. Was anyone around to witness this? My a branch. Queens. Sorry. I was in Queens. Was anyone around to witness this? My mother was around

to witness it. I was having lunch with her. The story's getting better and better. Yeah, we had Nepalese food in Queens. I kind of wish I would break my phone sometimes. It's so fun.

Yeah, it's a good time. And then I swept it underneath with the branch. Wow. What is Nepalese food like? It's kind of like Indian food but with more like kind of like Indian food, but with more like sort of dumplings

and hearty stews and stuff. Like we had this sort of like curried chicken thing, but also these like vegetable dumplings and a little soup. And then also there was this like- Sounds rustic. Yeah, it's like hearty food. You know, it's a mountainous country.

Sure. And then also we had this like donut, this sort of fried dough that was only a little sweet that you would like dip in stuff and like curried potatoes and stuff

it was great it's a great place in Queens in Queens I'll shout them out what's it called because it has a really weird name Burger King

Dunkin Donut that's it no it's called While in Kathmandu or Kathmandu you're right that is a it's called while in Kathmandu or Kathmandu you're right that is a weird name Kathmandu is the capital of Nepal

that's not the weird it's the while in I don't know very few restaurant names are sentences exactly it's on I think it's on Seneca Avenue

it's great look see that's the food hey that looks fun it's great it's a good time you get a bunch of stuff yeah

Nepalese food one in Queens while in That's the food. Hey, that looks fun. It's great. It's a good time. You get a bunch of stuff. Nepalese food. One in Queens. While in Kathmandu, Queens. When you're done branching your phone out from under a car. Oh, boy. With your mom. Yeah, with my mother.

With David's mom. Yes. So. So. Somebody. so somebody because there's that scene where Jesse gets shot where Henderson gets shot and he like spits the bullet out

that happens at the bar oh no no no no it's when they go to the hotel they go to the motel because the sunlight's coming up. Yeah. Right. So they got to pull into a motel quickly. And there's that great exchange where the old guy behind the desk says, like, don't I recognize you from a while back?

I come here every 50 years. Right. Better make the reservation now. Right. Well, I guess we should say because they do let that actor you were just previously talking about get away. James LeGrow gets away. And so he reports to the cops to then bring the cops to the first motel room. Right, that's what prompts the raid.

Because at first you think James LeGrow is just a very featured extra. He's getting a lot of reaction shots from this guy. He plays Teenage Cowboy. That's his official title. Okay. But he gets away. He's the one who survives. They go to this motel, and then they're raided.

Yeah. But even before that, little sneaky boy vampire. Yes, Homer. Goes to the soda machine. Sees a little girl who is Pasdar's sister, which he doesn't know. Right. Oh, boy. And he wants a little friend.

And that sucks. Yeah. No boy. And he wants a little friend. And that sucks. Yeah. No pun intended. So he brings her back and Pazdars immediately like, no way. Yeah. That's my sister.

Dad comes in. Yeah. He's like, who are these fucking kids you're hanging out with? That's when I believe the police raid happens very shortly after that. Yes. Right? Exactly. with that's when I believe the police raid happens very shortly after that right?

and that's when Caleb kind of rescues them and so they're into it but then Caleb escapes with his family at a certain point I'm trying to remember the fucking plot of this movie I just remember the connection I think you guys it's actually we flipped it?

it's the shootout, they get away and then the sister another motel and then there's a lot of motels in this movie there's a lot of motels yeah okay yeah mine motel um the shootout's like great it's like classic and the bullets bit is cool yes and the light's coming in i feel like she's finding cool ways to do fun vampire shit with no money right like? Like the bullets bit. Very simple, like practical effects. Or later when you see them catching on fire, like that's just old school stuntman shit that's fun.

Yeah. They just get really black and like... That's cool. ...burny and yeah. Yeah, I like it. It's great. And then finally they go... There's some CGI flames though.

This other cool idea, which I don't feel like I'd seen in a vampire movie before which is like what if we do a transfusion with normal blood right it's so simple it's very simple

just get the blood out oh that might be the cure right now that's silly but because I buy it in this movie because he just got turned into a vampire

how much blood could he have exactly like vampire blood right vampires don't make any sense anyway it doesn's your zero i mean yeah like why do they have blood but no like life like what are you talking about here they have like a brain and why are they dead you know what i mean yeah and like the whole thing of

her giving blood to him like why does she even have blood yeah right but they do blood but right they have blood i think usually supposed to be dead often that's how you sire them though is like you like uh i guess give them your vampire but it's also like they're drinking blood through their mouth but then it goes straight into their veins rather than their tummy uh shouldn't they have a blood tummy rather than like they do have a blood tummy but right but then yeah do they poop? Do nutrients go into the blood? Do they? I don't know.

Do they have a digestive system? They probably just pee. I don't know. Yeah, right. It is liquid. A lot of questions. We've had so many vampire TV shows, so many vampire movies. Still so many questions.

I still have questions. You should have the fans tweet at Griffin and David what you think about vampire poop. Yeah, hashtag vampire poop. Okay, so here's my pitch for how we answer have questions. You should have the fans tweet at Griffin and David what you think about vampire poop. Yeah, hashtag vampire poop. Okay, so here's my pitch for how we answer these questions. I want to make a procedural TV show called Transylvania General Hospital. Uh-huh. And it's a hospital that only treats vampires. Uh-huh.

And every episode you have- It's called Vampire Hospital? Let's shorten that. Transylvania General. You'd be a little ble's shorten that. Transylvania General. What about Transylvania General? Forget the hospital, right? That would sound like it's about Transylvania General to me. Just want to cast as wide a net.

A vampire patent. That sounds good too. Let's do two shows. Okay, I'm going to pitch this. General Transylvania and Transylvania General. This is my new interconnected TV universe. It's a series of procedural shows. It's like Law & Order.

I'm going to be the Dick Wolf vampire. Exactly. So there'll be like a vampire fireman. Dick Wolf, more like Dick Vampire. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. Why hasn't Dick Wolf ever made a spinoff about how he's a werewolf? Yeah.

He should. Isn't that what Law & Order is all about, though? Yes. All the criminals, they're like vampires. Right. And the cops are like lycans. It's like underworld. I had a very short-lived character bit that was Dick Werewolf.

Sounds bad. Where instead of howling at the moon, he does the dun-dun. I'm glad that was short-lived. Very short-lived. That's really good. It lived about as long as it took me to do it once. Here are the stories. Yeah.

Sure. But I just want to show, that's like House, where they're, like, trying to solve the, like, mystery, the medical mystery. At the end of every episode, the doctor goes, like, okay, I figured it out. Here's the deal. They poop blood. You know, like, the doctor just looks at the audience and explains a new physiological element of like vampires existence there must

there must like be in the works we're doing such a good job discussing Near Dark so proud of us me too

very good podcast we're gonna get 2.5 million dollars what happens next so now now he's cured now he's a nice trucker boy again. Yep.

Right. And the movie rides off in the sunset. Uh-huh. But unfortunately, they want his sister. Exactly. Uh-oh. Because she's a witness and also because she has blood. Turned her into a vampire.

Yep. And so then he gets on a horse. Yes. There turn her into a vampire. Yeah. And then so then he gets on a horse. Yes. There's the horseback scene. Yeah. Classic Weston style. Yeah. Great gloves. I mean then it's... Like his gloves. Then it's just the final showdown. Right. Yeah. It's just like yeah it's just the big

battle with all of them dying in sort of fun cool ways. That's a great showdown. Yeah I forgot that they just cure May at the end by giving her transfusion, which... Feels like it shouldn't take for her. Exactly. She's been a vampire for years. How many years?

Did she say like four years or something? I thought she said 40. 40? Oh, shit. When you get a blood transfusion, does it replace all of your blood? That would mean that the person giving you blood gives you all of her blood. And then she dies. There's limited amounts of blood at work here, right?

Right. With him, if it's like, okay, he's got a very limited amount of vampire blood. He just needs to flush it out of his system. It's like a cleanse, you know? But with her, it's like you need a full blood transplant essentially right

that's weird you gotta google it yeah can you also like what blood type is she like sure

is it the right blood type we don't even know how much blood do you get in a transfusion all these questions would be answered

on transfusion we should have a would be answered on Transfusion. We should have a doctor on this podcast. We should. We should. Yeah, well, James Hamlin could be on it, my co-worker.

He's a doctor. You have a co-worker who's a doctor? Yeah, he's a star writer at The Atlantic who used to be a doctor. He writes about stars at The Atlantic?

Astrology? He writes about health stuff. He's interviewed Obama. He's like way much bigger, way bigger deal than I am. And he's a doctor. Yeah. He used to have a series called on the,

on the site called if our bodies could talk, he's good. I love talking to James about my body. Well, Ben has a PhD. That's true. Oh, I'm sorry.

I forgot. You're not professor. No. Let's see. Blood transfusion. Don't get it confused. Usually you get one pint of blood. Okay.

It's not that much. That's not that much. That's about as much as someone can give up, I think, as well. Okay. Before you faint. Yeah, I remember. Before it's medically unhealthy for you to give more. Your body can make more blood

but it takes a day. In high school, they wouldn't let me participate in the blood drive because I was so skinny they said my body couldn't handle it. I'm not allowed to donate blood because I lived in another country. Although I think eventually that lapses. Dirty British blood.

There's some time limit on it, like 10 years or something. So I think I might be finally able to. You know, they have a lot of like really intense limits on who can get blood. Yeah,

that's true. There was also a point in high school where my doctor thought I had mercury poisoning because I was hanging out with Jeremy Pippen a lot. I was about to say,

were you eating a lot of sushi with the little kids? No, I don't eat fish at all. I eat zero seafood. And they were like, we think you might have dangerous levels of mercury in your bloodstream uh-huh so they had to take like 10 vials of blood out of my arm that sounds like a lot a lot right like the little

vials but it's oh i know it's a pen it's a pen i'm like there most of those i've done is like three right i'm strapped into this thing and it's just sort of going and I'm like purposefully like looking away and then I just hear the nurse go oh and I went what and she went uh no more is coming out your body was just like enough yeah to the other arm and got five vials

out of the other arm last time I had blood taken I was just sitting there and as the blood started I was like like as it's coming out I was like I haven't eaten today

and the nurse was like are you fucking serious like that and I was like yeah I just realized I forgot to have breakfast and she just went like this

she just held her hand out and I almost immediately went like like and she I just my head hit her hand and I just conked out she had to really put up with some bullshit the last time I did a blood test I was supposed to not eat My head hit her hand and I just conked out.

She had to really put up with some bullshit. The last time I did the blood test, I was supposed to not eat. It's the worst. You're supposed to go, I don't know what you're saying in English. You can't eat before if they're doing cholesterol or whatever. Yeah. What they should have done

when you told them that was kept the one sort of drip in to get your blood out but then also giving you an IV drip with like a hamburger

so one arm they were putting nutrients in a burger drip they should have given you one of those do you have any burger reports? no and I've been

looking so do you have any burger reports oh you know what I saw Ben Mendelsohn eat a burger fuck that's a burger report We were at TIFF

Mendelsohn eating a burger? Did you see any famous people at the Toronto Film Festival eating burgers? No I only saw Tracy Letts walking by twice

That's it He wasn't eating a burger Did you check his hands? I saw Tracy Letts I checked his hands Tracy you got a burger in there somewhere? Show me your tongue

He's like alright Anything in your mouth? Yeah no He was awesome he was wearing that what the fuck I forget now oh the Greta Gerwig t-shirt

yeah the Greta Gerwig t-shirt because he's in her movie he's amazing and I saw him actually I realized later that the woman next to him was Greta Gerwig but I didn't recognize her

because I just care about Tracy Letts the one person sorry Greta Greta Gerwig was wearing a Tracy Letts t-shirt right I hope so

her movie is the best movie really impressed I went to a lot of parties at TIFF because you go to all these parties Jesus Christ but the only time and obviously the parties often have

kid and play over here often have sliders which is a burger I know what a slider is I'm the Jerry O'Connell of sliders. Three house parties? Which is a burger. Yeah, I know. I know what a slider is. But I'm just saying. I'm the Jerry O'Connell of sliders, okay? The star? Been on them for years.

I mean, he really hasn't been on sliders for years at this point. I was for a number of years. The burgers. I'm like holding. Just because you're the burger report judge one of us has to be you know where it's like

does this merit the burger report and definitely at the darkest hour party that was when I for the new Joe Wright movie the Winston Churchill movie

I was so hungry and I had to like go to a screening after this party so I was like trying to eat as many hors d'oeuvres as I could

like I was the guy who like anytime someone came by I was just like yep give me that that's fine let's just put it in my mouth that's like every critic though i know but it's so bad for you because like i know a healthy meal is not six sliders that you ate standing up like that's that's not like a nutritious your body's not gonna react to that with it like oh thank you i'll digest this normally i've been like so desperate to find the burger report of my own that like almost anytime I go to a restaurant that has a burger on the menu, I order it myself because I somehow think that will will another FAMO into showing up.

Oh, right. Yeah. It's like you don't even need to be eating a burger for a burger report to happen. There's no correlation in my mind, but I'm just like, just be the burger report you want to see in the world. correlation in my mind but i'm just like just maybe it'll be the burger report you want to see in the world so i'm standing there right by the kitchen door so i can really grab some hors d'oeuvres and then mendelsohn sweeps by me with his friends or whoever i always got and they and he sits down and he has brought many trays of food including the burgers uh anyway ben mendelsohn uh yeah he looks like you uh would picture he would look

he looks like he had a very natty suit on is he short? no oh really? he always strikes me as short yeah I don't remember him

seeming short I'm going to look up his height now 7'15 oh okay 5'11 is he in is he in Duckers Tower?

yeah and he's fantastic in it he's George stuttering George King stuttering George VI great in it who doesn't King Stuttering George VI. Great in it. Who doesn't love Ben Mendelsohn? No one. Bingo.

The Rebels? Sure, right. Yes, that's true. K2SO? Yeah, RIP. Well, that's been our episode in the near dark, obviously. Is there anything else in the near dark obviously is there anything else in the end I mean it's cool

when they all die yeah we have to talk about that because it's really cool I think so then like they all the good thing

is that they all start fighting each other about do we kill the little girl or not like they all start getting angry because like

May doesn't want to kill her but then all the guys kind of want to right and then the other woman also doesn't want to kill her but then all the guys kind of want to and then the other woman also doesn't want to and she like helps her that's the Janet Goldstein

Lou Diamondback she tries and help her and then like there's this amazing scene where they're just running and the sun is like really up now and they were kind of just burning that's pretty cool and the one kneels down can't run away from the sun is like really up now. And they were kind of just burning. That's where you go.

And the one kneels down. Can't run away from the sun. True. Although there are movies where I've seen people run away from the sun. It's really bad. Mummy Returns has a scene where they're trying to outrun the sun. Sure, the good sun. That scene where they're trying to run away from it.

But they do cure May. From Macaulay. Yeah. With a blood transfusion, which I'm not into. Why? It's so hacky. Yeah, but it's so romantic. All right.

It's a nice note. And it's a bit easy. But all the others are dead. It's a bit easy. Sure. But all the others are dead. All the others are dead after all. She's a good person. Truck blows up.

One of them dies in the road. Like kneels down. Yeah. Turns into a pillar of salt practically. He's dead after all, so. And she's a good person. Truck blows up, one of them dies in the road, like kneels down. Yeah. Turns into a pillar of salt practically. It's cool. I just wish they could keep dating

and he didn't have to be a vampire. Like, I feel like that's the kind of progressive narrative I want. yeah, yeah,

yeah. You know? Griffin just made like a weirdly intense face. I want. I want it. Near Dark, they keep trying to remake it

I feel like that never happens but you always hear that bubbling up it came very close in the mid 2000s and then they said like well Twilight stole our thunder and it's like if you think that Twilight

stole your thunder then you shouldn't have been remaking Near Dark then you clearly don't understand Near Dark right it's a movie about grodyness. It is a grody movie.

DEG release. It came out October 2nd, 1987. 30 years ago. Almost to the day. Witching month. 3.3 million was its total domestic gross. Bad. On a budget of 5 million.

It is number 50 in box office mojos. it's total domestic gross. Bad? On a budget of $5 million. It is number 50 in Box Office Mojo's vampire chart. Is number one Hotel Transylvania? No. Hotel Transylvania is number seven. Wow. Think about it, dude.

Oh, Twilight. There's four or five Twilight movies and then Hotel Transylvania 2 and then Hotel Transylvania. HG2 outgrossed HG1? Yeah. 169 to 148. Wow.

Take that. Then Van Helsing and The Vampire. Those are the nine vampire movies that have grossed over 100. And the Coppola Dracula one came pretty close. Came close.

That's a bad movie. It is. It's a great looking movie. It's a great movie it is it's a great looking movie it's a great like making of book yeah you know

I tried to watch it once in London there was a pub who was showing it for free and I went to a friend and I was like what am I doing here this is like the worst movie

I've ever seen and I just walked out but if you took still images and put them up in a gallery it would be a great show that is not the best way to see Francis Ford I know

that's Dracula in a pub but it's something like fun come on like watching a vampire movie in a dark weird pub with like weirdos there this is the best way

to watch it I don't know but that movie's very like romantic and gothic but it's also a movie that probably plays better with the sound off

probably sure sure and Keanu's horrible in it really really bad as we will talk about on point break we're messed up from our finest actor

number one the weekend of October 2nd, near dark open. 87. 13th at the box office. Unlucky. Good point. Thank you. Number one at the box office

is the second most successful film of this year. And I can't wait for you to tell me what the most successful film of 87 was. It was like a thriller uh it was like a thriller it was like a huge financial hit a huge zeitgeist thing and it got a bunch of Oscar nominations don't think it won any my it didn't win any fatal attraction fatal attraction my favorite movie uh adrian lines I was gonna say it but it's fine sex thriller uh not really what do you what would you call it sort of uh it's an erotic thriller it's fine. Sex thriller. Very good. What would you call it?

It's an erotic thriller. It's an erotic thriller. One of the early ones. One of the best ones. But it's also like a male panic movie. Second wave feminism is making men paranoid. Don't know what to do with female freedom. That shot of her on the roller coaster, that's my favorite part of that movie.

I love that so much. We were also talking about how Michael Douglas is fascinating because he was the first movie star whose persona was this guy's a piece of shit. Yeah.

It's true. There were bad boys movie stars but he was just like this guy fucking sucks. Wall Street, Disclosure, there's a lot. That's all his career.

It's true. He's a slime ball. He's like 80s king slime ball. Which is funny because in movies like Wonder Boys he's such a sweet little gremlin.

But I remember my dad seeing Wonder Boys and being like I can't believe I liked Michael Douglas in this because my dad was so revulsed for years by the Michael Douglas

persona that he almost couldn't reconcile him playing a guy that he didn't want to punch. Right. I understand that. Fatal Attraction which

has been number one for three weeks it makes, it's made 31 million so far. How much do you think Fatal Attraction grossed domestically in 1987? 115? 156. I remember that. And it was also the highest grossing film worldwide. Right. Worldwide I could see that

but it's the second highest grossing domestic. What is the highest grossing domestic film of 1987? Was it also... It was a comedy, Three Men and a Baby? Three Men and a Baby. That was the number one hit of the year. I remember that because that's the most anomalous number one film of the year ever. And the top five are Three Men and a Baby, Fatal Attraction, Beverly Hills Cop 2, Good Morning Vietnam, and Moonstruck.

Jeez. In case anyone forgets that Hollywood's changed in 30 years. All right, so number two is a comedy. It's sort of a fantasy comedy, which is interesting. How do you describe this movie? Does it feature a big comedic star? Yes, you know what it is, clearly.

Is it the Golden Trail? No, good guess, but no. It features a big comedic star, but I would say his star is about to be, is sort of on the wane at this point. But not like an Eddie Murphy type. Like, this is a comedian. It's not Chevy.

No. I think Across the Pond. but not like an Eddie Murphy type like this is a comedian it's not Chevy no across the pond Dudley Moore what is the movie it is a fantasy comedy starring a teenage star but which one is it it's not vice versa

no it's a body switch comedy I know the Dudley Moore one Oh! It's not vice versa, right? No, no. It's a body switch comedy, as Griffin has surmised. I know, I know. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. The Dudley Moore one. So, wait. Dudley Moore is paired with not Kirk Cameron, right?

It is Kirk Cameron. It is Kirk Cameron. Yes. Okay. Yep. Sean Astin is in this movie. Is the title alliterative? Sure.

Yes. Yes, it is. It is? Yeah. It's two words, and they both. Is the title alliterative? Sure. Yes, it is. It is? It's two words and they both start with the same letter. It's four words, but each phrase starts with the same letter. Fuck, god damn it. I give up. I give up.

Like father, like son. He's mad about it. Is that a first? That you didn't get it? No, it happens once in a while. Once in a while, okay. It's weird that I know the movie and I don't know what it's called about it. Is that a first? That you didn't get it? No, it happens once in a while. Once in a while, okay. It's weird that I know the movie and I don't know what it's called. Right.

Right, yes, that's pretty unusual. But it's a pretty anonymous title, to be fair. Right, and there was that weird period where, like, three of those came out in one year. Yeah, the sort of Freaky Friday type movie. Right, but there were three, like, dad body swap movies. My favorite genre. Well put, well put well put right uh number three i mean this is seriously this is a tough one okay i've never heard of this film but uh it does star someone

we've talked about uh a lot in recent uh our recent interactions for some reason on mic or off my on and off mic uh but on mic a lot in the monday episode that we recorded uh it's a crime thriller starring a uh a white guy and a black guy um so i've never heard of this movie it's uh it sounds completely fucking insane we've talked about the director? No, the star. The white guy. Okay, so it's two leads.

Ben literally said his name at the start of the episode. David? No. Who? What? David Sims? Yeah, I mean it. I was one year old.

It's not The Foe? No. Ben said his name at the beginning of the episode. This is a hard one to fucking... The title of the movie is a job. Like a job title. Is it like the blank? Yes, the blank.

It's been out for three weeks. It's going to gross $19 million. It's an R-rated crime thriller. Jeez, I'm trying a total blank here. Yeah, I don't know what to tell you, man. Can you give me one of the two actors? The black guy is Louis Gossett Jr. It's not Iron Eagles.

No. I have no idea. The other star is James Belushi. What? What? And it is called The Principal.

Oh, I know that movie. I was hoping you'd never heard of it. What is this movie? I've heard of this movie. It's like Jim Belushi. Jim Belushi is a high school teacher with a drinking problem. It's like if Dangerous Minds was violent. It's like Jim Belushi is the new principal in town in an inner city high school and has to lay down the law.

He's transferred to a tough school Louis Gossett Jr. is like the head of security at this school the poster is like him outside of a school building

holding a baseball bat yes which is upsetting and it's like they have to clean up the school yeah I guess just beat up some kids

I guess I have only seen the poster for that movie I imagine it sucks. Yeah, I don't think it's good. Is it a comedy? No. No, no, no, no.

What? Which is, again, we talk about it in another episode. Like Belushi made a lot of dramas. Had a lot of shots. So number four is sort of a surprise hit of 87, starring an Oscar-winning, well-known veteran actor and kind of a young star it's like a kind of like a crime comedy drama uh you've actually weirdly guessed the sequel to this movie in the box office game before oh stakeout stakeout good job thank you good job uh have you. Good job. Have you seen Stakeout?

Richard Dreyfuss and Emilio Estevez? No, my friend used to swear by Stakeout and hated another Stakeout. Another Stakeout is the sequel to Stakeout. And they add Rosie O'Donnell. Yes. That came out like way... That's the other thing.

It came out like seven years later and it's like, why are you... It took too long. Stakeout was like a surprise hit. Surprise hit. Dreyfuss and Estevez? Dreyfus and Estevez, yes. It also features Aidan Quinn, Madeline Stowe. The John Badham director?

John Badham directed it. We have Forrest Whitaker. He also directed another Stakeout. That's the director of Saturday Night Live. I mean, Saturday Night Fever. Yeah, he's been directing Saturday Night Live for 42 seasons. What else? He directed War Games. Deliverance, right?

No, Deliverance is John Borman. No, that's John Borman. Anyway, number five is a well-loved hit movie of the year that remains beloved to this day. Sort of a cheesy romantic movie that rocks. It rocks? That rocks? It's a great movie.

Does it roll? Sure, a little bit. In a 50s kind of way. You like it a lot. This movie's pretty lovable. It stars an actress that I just had the biggest crush on when I was a kid. But that might not be that helpful

because I had weird crushes. No, that's why I think it might be helpful. And the actor is someone Bigelow will later work with. Interesting. Not Keanu. No. Oh, is it a Swayze picture?

It's Dirty Dancing. Dirty Dancing. Had a huge crush on Jennifer Grey mostly in Ferris Bueller. Not surprising at all. Queen. She's a queen. had a huge crush on Jennifer Grey mostly in Ferris Bueller yeah not surprising at all queen she's a queen

yeah of the 80s well that how do you feel about Dirty Dancing Manny it's pretty fun I think it's

yeah like it's maybe not the most woke movie ever but it's pretty fun no no no but I don't like

judging movies like that anyway nah it's a 30 year old. No, no. But I don't like judging movies like that anyway. Nah, it's a 30-year-old movie. Jerry Orbach is in it. A great director. That movie cost pretty much as much as Near Dark cost to make

but it made a little more money. Nice. That movie almost went straight to video. I know. It feels like it should go straight to video. It's the stupidest idea

for a movie ever. Do you know I have never seen it? But I saw Dirty Dancing Havana Night's opening night. It's a good movie. It's the stupidest idea for a movie ever. Do you know I have never seen it? But I saw Dirty Dancing Havana Night's opening night. It's a good movie. It's not bad. Rama, Gary, Diego Luna. Two pretty people.

Yep. Yeah. That's the next one. Which is like technically set in the same universe. Is that the sort of gimmick with that one? Right. Patrick Swayze appears in it even though the movie is set 20 years earlier. Yeah, it doesn't make any fucking sense. And he's 20 years older.

Yes, correct. Other movies, you got Hellraiser. Oh, okay. That's pretty good. Yeah, I love that movie. That's a crazy 80s. That's number one in the puzzle box genre on Box Office Mojo, right? Number one in the configuration.

Someone thinks he's funny. It is the number one Hellraiser movie it made only 14 million dollars domestic it's crazy that there have been like 4 theatrical Hellraisers off of that there's so many Hellraisers you've got

the pick up artist young RDJ in a totally creepy movie one of the most tobaccoakian films ever made. He's such a creep. He's Tabakian. You gotta give him credit. You got Big Shot. I don't know what that is. Looking it up.

This was my worst box office game in a long time. It's kind of amazing, actually. I'm disappointed. I'm disappointed in myself. I'd like to announce I'm stepping down from the podcast you're better from

no you're better from games when you were alive true but even still I feel like I'm usually better at sussing them out

I have nothing for you on big shots I don't know it was called a big bad comedy so I think it was sort of you know

there was some like it's like a black guy and a white guy. And I'm sure it's all very. Things are bad. I don't know. All very clever.

La Bamba, number nine, with our boy, Lou Diamond. That was his breakout. He's fantastic in that. So we've mentioned him 12 times in one episode. No Way Out with Gene Hackman and Kevin Costner. And we don't have to go all the way down. Well, it's the top 10.

Near Dark is number 13. That sucks. That's a bummer. It opened in 262 theaters and it tried to build it didn't really but it did expand the next week

and then it kind of just you know vanishes. But it's kind of known now. Like, people really like this movie now. Definitely. Yes, but I wish people could see this movie. Yeah, well, yeah.

It would be nice if the Blu-ray didn't cost 80 bucks on Amazon or whatever. Right, or if it were available. I mean, this is like the great crime of, like, the death of video rental places. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is when all rentals exist digitally, and then there's a rights issue. Yes. suddenly it disappears

from every single platform simultaneously. Right. Yeah. Well I think I first saw it because my sister found it in a CX. So it was cool.

Sex. Very lucky. In the sex. Yeah. It was great. Great movie. Yeah. Fun to talk about it.

Yeah. Fun to talk about other stuff as well. Manny thank you so much for being here on the show. Thanks for having me. If you wouldn't mind flying coach on the way back just because we're a little strapped.

Well, it just turns out that MacArthur grants less than I thought it was. I thought it was one million lump sum and now I realize we're getting a quarter of $600,000. That's offensive. We might have blown our entire budget on this episode. It was worth it, right?

A, we had to buy Near Dark. Yeah. Every print available. Yes. Every print. Yeah. Well, you're welcome. Yeah, at least we own the rights now.

That's true. So we can release it on Blu-ray. I got this idea, like a real sexy cover, you know, a real Twilight-y cover. Sure. Yeah, let's really like sex it up. Sure. I'm going to do a true blood cover. Let's put on competing covers and see which one sells better

great ask your followers one of my earliest jobs on the internet was recapping True Blood for the AB Club oh really oh wow because nobody wanted to deal with that show because it had the worst fans really were like True Blood fans very territorial yeah

and they were the kind of the worst fans are always the fans who only watch that show you know they don't like view TV as like some sort of like spectrum of programming

that has good things and bad things they were just like I know I watch True Blood every week and I'm pretty sure it's the best show on TV so what's this B-

you're giving it this was a good episode of True Blood because it was an episode of True Blood yeah right in the yeah comparing it to nothing else, and I love it.

I disagree with you. Fake blood. The truest blood. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is another one of those. South Park. There are certain shows where it's like the fans just don't watch other TV. They just love that show. They feel ownership.

They're new. They feel ownership, yeah. People can follow you on Twitter yes at Manny Lazic that's me I believe it's Lazich but I'll let you

off the hook for that one well I didn't put the accent kind of embarrassing but I'll let you off the hook yes and follow your work on Little White Lies yeah

yeah I still write for them and I write for other places sometimes don't shoplift it no don't shoplift go to a website or buy a proper

head on over to FOP just walk out no one's gonna bug you that's true but don't tell that to anyone come on just do it

just to pay for it it's nice how much does it cost these days? I don't know I get it for free because I write for them but it's worth it

yeah yeah that's the lap of luxury we live in media where we get our own magazines for free yeah you have studios paying us to write good reviews and your magazine But it's worth it. Yeah, yeah. Those are the lap of luxury we live in media. Yeah. Our own magazines for free. Yeah, you have studios paying us to write good reviews and your magazine giving you free issues.

My Marvel check's got to clear. Right. Or else Ragnarok's getting a pan. I mean, how much is Catherine Bigelow giving you? Catherine Bigelow paid for my trip here, so. Yeah, that's true. We are basically a money laundering operation for Catherine Bigelow. 100%.

It's directors who feel like their names aren't mentioned enough. Hire us. Hire us and other podcasts. Yes, right. Some other podcast in the exact same order. At the same time. To discuss them. But hey, look, we're probably the only podcast doing a near dark episode.

Yes, that's true. We're the only podcast stupid enough to do a whole episode about a movie you can't watch. But we watched it. We talked about it. Great job. What if that episode makes someone decide to make it available? Hey. Huh?

Huh? Hey. The power of podcasts. They're ganging up on me right now, guys. They're like, huh, David? I've been arguing against this it's possible

it is possible and I hope it happens and yeah I hope that this and Strange Days get proper releases on Blu-ray yeah

again you know that are available they just need to make a Bigelow box set I would buy a Bigelow box set just like my Nolan box set that came with a lovely book

about him I got the same one with his little postcard nice his little glossy postcard who wrote about him? oh just you know

Tom Stoppard no I don't know it's like copywriters it's like very generic they're not like essays it just like has like a description of like his next movie was about

Batman have you heard of him? the superhero? what is what it's about. Yeah. Sounds good. But it has podcasts. Yeah, I'd love one of those.

And you'd have to like get the weight of water but it would be fun. Yeah. You know, that's pretty light. Won't weigh down the box. Water's heavy, man.

Get enough of it. I remember studying that in school. I don't remember what the weight of water is. No one does. I guess I have to watch the movie.

That's right. Spoiler alert. It weighs, I don't know, 40 pounds. Yeah. What, I think an hour 40, hour 45?

Why the fuck is it called? Well, we'll see. I haven't watched it yet. We'll get to it. All right, Ben. All right. Ben hates this. We're wrapping up.

Wrap it up. Take us out. That has been part four of our Near Dark episode. Thank you all for listening please remember to rate review subscribe thanks to Andrew Guto

for our social media Joe Bowen and Pat Rollins for our artwork Lane Montgomery for our theme song go to blankies.reddit.com for some real

nerdy shit have you seen the recent thing that's going on in the reddit you have which thing that someone found oh yeah the misconnect that someone found oh yeah

the misconnection someone found a misconnection from my since deleted tinder profile oh because my tinder profile was so bad they were like i haven't been able to forget how weird this was and couldn't figure out if it was a bit or not it was a bit right it was not i just hate myself well okay but your whole life is a bit. Agreed, in that sense. Yes. So wait, are you going to go on a date with this person? I have no idea. I emailed with her and she was like, why would you make that profile? Okay, maybe this isn't a winner for you.

I don't know. I don't know. I'm trying to explain to her my life now. At least she's intrigued. Yeah. Yeah. My profile picture was me with a fake gash on my chest. Right.

What was it from? Thanksgiving, the Go90 original series. Remember it won a bunch of Emmys? Wait, a gash on your chest? No comment. It was like makeup from a set that makes it look like I've been stabbed in the chest. But the photo was pretty realistic looking. Okay, so maybe it looks like someone went and dug out your heart, right?

Hey, yes. And so you need to date someone to like find your heart again. Yeah. It's a little lower than that. I think it's got more of a like a liver vibe to it. Ben's going to kill you.

Okay. Ben is angry about everything. He is scarlet with rage. Classic. Sorry. Wrap it up. Sorry, Ben. It's fine.

Go to Reddit. Yeah. Thanks, Aaron. All that stuff. And Fairgrudo for our social. I said all of that. Oh, sure. Great. We're trying to wrap it up. Okay. David, come on. Thanks to Aaron. All that stuff. And Shparegudo for our I said all of that. Oh sure. Great.

We're trying to wrap it up. Okay. David come on. Oh sorry. David let me explain this to you okay. Now he's going. We're trying to end

the episode. Uh huh. So you shouldn't say things that I've already said. And as always I literally I just pulled my leg.

What? Recording a podcast. I just pulled a muscle in my leg. My leg Recording a podcast. I just pulled a muscle in my leg. My leg hurts a lot right now.