Blank Check with Griffin & David - Ready Player One

Episode Date: April 1, 2018

In March of 2018, Griffin and David discussed director Steven Spielberg’s new film Ready Player One. But did Griffin audition for a part? Was Gene Wilder rumored to have been considered for one of the roles? Will only 90’s and 2000’s kids understand the references? Together they examine Tye Sheridan’s career, Deadpool bits, author Ernest Cline’s novel and more! This episode is sponsored by Stamps.com (PROMO: CHECK) Blue Apron (blueapron.com/check) and WeTransfer.com.

People come to the Oasis for all the things they can do, but they stay for all the things they can podcast. Yeah. Welcome to the Oasis. Get ready for some ready player fun. Yeah. Ready player. Fine. It's ready player.

Okay. Ready player. Ready player. Okay, Steven. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. okay okay we're still doing the same bit yeah hello everybody we are hashtag the three keys so uh i'm copper you're you're jade right and he's crystal ben's crystal producer ben is crystal crystal ben ducer's crystal i'm sick and i'm too tired i honestly just don't have the energy to do the next

He ran out of steam right before my very eyes. He's graduated to some titles. Yeah. I don't know. Hello Phil. Fill in the blanks. Yeah. If you're listening to this and you've listened to our last March Madness recap, you know

that I was sick. I'm still sick. I'm a little bit on the upswing now. That's good. So we have three episodes that comprise my head cold. It's that one. It's this one and one that will come out two and a half years from now. Correct. That's where the complaints begin.

It's literally an end of July episode where I'm still suffering from the same cold, right? This is a cold that spans dimensions. Yes. Hello, everybody. My name is Griffin Newman. My name is David Sims. This is a podcast about filmographies. Yes. Hello, everybody. My name is Griffin Newman. My name is David Sims. This is a podcast about filmographies. Yes.

Jump. You want some synths, Ben? A song that Steven Spielberg definitely loves. You can tell every time there's a needle drop in this movie that he's like,

I cannot wait to play this song that means a lot to me. There's not any, there's so few needle jumps in this movie that he's like, I cannot wait to play this song. That means a lot to me. There's not any, there's so few needle jumps in this movie though. There are enough. I thought it was going to be like wall to wall needle jumps. Everybody wants to rule the world. They play.

What's the one? We're not going to take it. Yeah. I'm just saying like this movie didn't even have like crazy credits tom sawyer yeah but they didn't know that tom sawyer is not in the movie i was really annoyed about you're right yeah that's in the trailer take on me no but that's not in the movie either is it not no it's i already don't remember you exactly you make my dreams was that i think that was that's over the closing credits jeez the podcast about filmographies directors of massive success early on in their That's over the closing credits. Jeez.

The podcast about filmographies. It's called Blank Check. Directors have massive success early on in their career and give a series of checks to make whatever crazy past products they want. Sometimes they clear and sometimes they bounce, baby. Oh, cheer up, Griffin. Oh, my God. Oh, Jesus. He's dead.

He died. Ben. It's just you and I, David. Give him an extra life. Hey, but guess what? Oh, okay. Here. Bling. Guess what? I've left behind a series of clues so you can figure out how to take over this podcast. Ben it's just you and I David give him an extra life hey but guess what oh okay here guess what

I've left behind a series of clues so you can figure out how to take over this podcast you think if someone listened to this podcast they'd be able to figure out what you like I don't know

you never really get to talk about your passions I tweeted this but this movie made me feel like Seymour in Ghost World when Enid goes like there must be some woman out there you can meet who shares your interest.

And he goes, I don't want to meet someone who has my interest. I hate my interest. Like, I watched this movie and I was like, I fucking hate my interest. Burn it all down. Welcome to a collective crisis moment in every nerdy boy's, every nerdy millennial's life. I don't know. Yeah. Where we realize like, okay, maybe we shouldnial's life. I don't know. Yeah. Where we realize like,

okay, maybe we shouldn't be this invested in all this crap. Yeah. Maybe I should throw all my action figures in a fire. Correct. Sometimes a director we've covered in the past

through a miniseries has a new film and we have to go back and cover it. Right. It happened with Split by M. Night Shyamalan. We have to go back. We have to go back. Correct. It happened with The Post. It happened with The Post by Steven Spielamel we have to go back we have to go back correct happened with the post happened with the post by steven spielberg and now it has happened at long last with the director steven spielberg yes who is back just three months after he released an oscar-nominated

drama more prolific than everyone else we covered with like a 200 million dollar video game action movie yeah starring the hottest name ty sheridan ty sheridan we do have to talk about ty sheridan's Like a $200 million video game action movie. Yeah. Starring the hottest name. Ty Sheridan. Ty Sheridan. We do have to talk about Ty Sheridan's career though because it's fascinating. Sure. It's fascinating.

I'm unbuttoning my shirt. Please keep it on. We're talking Ready Player One today. Yeah. Ready Player One. Can we talk Ty Sheridan for for a second i want to lead with we're going to talk about the film ready player one a steven spielberg film his 26th film or something i don't know he's made a lot of films i think might be close to 30 now right uh a ty

sheridan film steven spielberg let's see i think yeah it might be 30 maybe 29 yeah yeah maybe 30 good for him it's a lot of movies is indiana jones what ben turning 30 it gets awkward it gets awkward it gets weird what happens well your body starts falling apart yeah of 32 excuse me uh and you have to start sort of facing your own mortality. No, I'm 31. You're 31. Yes. And then what else? I'm 29. Oh, this is all great warnings for you. Yeah.

I'm right on the cusp. I guess you start kind of feeling like you want to bring something else into the world, like your biological sort of, I don't even know what would we call that. Like a bounce baby? Yeah. You want to bring in a baby. You kind of want to bring in a baby and then just pass along all of the knowledge you have.

Sure. I'll say, I know a lot about like Buckaroo Banzai and Pac-Man. Yeah, it's like you kind of want to be like, hey, look at all these games and this nostalgia. You know, you get excited to know get excited to this is the shit i like you know yeah exactly that must mean it's interesting and that also means they're gonna love it oh did you smoke 40 cigarettes before coming in here newsflash i'm sick jesus that's what happens

when you're sick griffin had like eight teas at the Alamo when we saw this movie. Yeah, it turns out Alamo doesn't have a great sick menu. There's no chicken noodle soup at the Alamo. I'm sorry. You got kind of a noodle bowl, Ben, or something. What'd you get? You got an Isle of Dogs dish. No, I didn't.

Didn't you? I got a salmon. I got a roasted salmon salad. Oh, was it good? It was actually good. Yeah, it looked pretty good. Wait, don't, this isn't gonna, I'm not gonna be called like the fucking fish lover or something, right? I mean, now you are.

You're the one who said it. It feels a little repetitive. It does. I mean, I already have meat lover. You love meat. Fish is sort of, you know, it's flesh. Yeah. It's meat adjacent.

There was an Isle of Dogs special menu. I thought you had ordered from that where there was a crazy complicated noodle dish. It did look vaguely Asian, your dish. The thing least conducive to eating during a movie. I know. Trust me, I thought about slurping down a bowl of soup at a movie in the dark. Yeah, exactly. Who doesn't love doing that?

I love to look at my bowl as I watch a movie. That's why, yeah. I always order soup. I'll say, more and more lately, I've been feeling like I'm going to retire again. As we all know, I retired a couple years ago, and then unfortunately I got cast on The Tick, and that ruined everything. Sure. I'm going to retire again. Someday.

Just as soon as The Tick finishes season 10. Right. I'm going to retire. Uh-huh. But I've just been feeling like I fuck all of my career ambitions okay goodbye to all of it when I was watching this movie I went everything

I like is dumb throw it in the rear view I just want to raise a child and have that child be better than I am I want to raise a child that's in touch with nature you sound like you're going to give your kid a complex you're going to be like go outside and touch with nature you sound like you're gonna give your kid a complex you're gonna be like go outside and be with nature and the kid's like this star wars thing you like

that kind of seems cool and you're like no no okay no here's the thing honestly my goal is to give my kid no complexes yeah you're not gonna succeed if you go in with a plan i think you might give your kid a car i'm not gonna go in with any sort of plan but i might move to the andes you're not moving to the end i might move to the andes I think you might give your kid a complex. I'm not going to go in with any sort of plan, but I might move to the Andes. You're not moving to the Andes. I might move to the Andes. That's going to give your kid a complex. If the kid finds, oh, so every kid who lives in the Andes is fucked up, that's offensive? I don't know.

Every actor's son whose parent has decided to live in the Andes definitely has a complex. He wouldn't even know I was an actor because I'd be retired. So you won't talk about your life. I'm just saying, you're assuming that anyone who doesn't grow up in a big city is ruined. Oh no, everyone who grows up in a big city is ruined. Thank you. So I'm saying, let's move to a mountaintop where Amazon,

even Amazon can't reach us. I don't think they have cheddar bagel twists on the top of the Andes. Yeah, what are you have cheddar bagel twists on the top of the ante. Yeah, what are you going to eat? It's the only thing I would miss. Yeah, exactly. I would die. You would definitely die.

You would die within minutes. You're like, hi, where's pizza? They'd be like, what? They'd be like, no, man. I thought you wanted to retreat from all public life. I just want to raise a good kid. All right, well, let's not make- Doesn't watching this movie make you hate everything you love

though no really no we're on different sides of this i do not feel the way you do about this movie everyone's everyone's too worked up about this movie this movie's becoming like this sort of like you know uh yeah no this makes me a nightmare moment or something like this relax this movie makes me nostalgic for world of warcraft. Remember those fun summer days? Oh, I love Gul'dan. I don't know what happens in Warcraft.

Orcs. Okay, so this movie's based on a novel by Ernie Klein. Yeah, the guy who wrote Fanboys. Yes. What else is he?

And then he wrote a book after this called Armada that was like a last Starfighter type thing. Yeah, that was post Ready Player One. Yeah, I yeah i never read that i mean i never read the book this book either it is and a lot of people have been pointing this out this is not an original thought it is crazy to think about when ready player one came out in 2011 versus like what

where pop culture is seven years later yes you know like when ready player one like the came out like the marvel cinematic universe thing people were still like i don't know a thor movie like everyone relaxed we also thought that like avengers was untenable yeah put all those characters in one movie in one whole movie they're gonna do a whole story for everyone i don't think so yeah but even then people at the time were like okay it was a moment where geek culture was now commodified and mainstream. And you had your Nerdist podcast and your, I don't know, South by Southwest had all its nerdy thing. I don't know. I mean, David Chen said if this movie had come out 10 or 20 years ago, it would have been a watershed moment.

Yeah, but I saw that tweet, but I don't know what that means. Because this movie wouldn't come out then. Well, it could have come out then because everything it's referencing is from before then. True. But there wasn't a lot of nostalgia yet. You know, you got to build up the nostalgia, right? Isn't that like, you know,

the people who are making this stuff now, they grew up in the 80s, right? That's the argument. I mean, not Steven Spielberg, to be clear. But we're still caught up on the 80s. I mean, really, we're more in the 90s the 90s wave is coming right yeah that that that's i feel like that's gonna be an insufferable like but i think i think we're in the middle of that right but it's gonna get worse sure i just think you you go i love the 80s was like 2003 oh was that was that

peak 80s nostalgia i'm saying that's when we really start chewing the 80s stuff sure right i don't say i'm not saying that show was responsible for that but i'm saying that was the beginning of the wave yeah you know the tip of the spear sure that was inevitable okay i think we're pretty firmly in 90s stuff right now i think we're already even tiptoeing into early 2000s stuff. Yeah, but you know, movies are slower than TV or slower than the internet. You know, this thing takes, this stuff takes longer. The point is

Ernie Klein wrote a book in which the knowledge and love of all the pop culture that he grew up with is the most valuable currency in the world. He wrote, right, yes, yes, that's the world this has set it. Right.

The real world is ruined. Right. Just forget it. Right. Just bad. But everything's defined by his generation's pop culture. The man who made the virtual world everyone lives in loved the 80s. Much like the man who wrote the book.

Sure. Right. And so, right. world everyone lives in love the 80s much like the man who wrote the book sure right uh and so right it's this like ossified hellscape uh where everyone needs to know just say an 80s thing and what fucking i don't know annoyed or whatever rick the wing commander you know everyone needs to know the die code but everything's stuck in sort of an infinite feedback loop right

we're just chewing over the same 80s stuff I mean essentially like this movie has a lot of 90s stuff in it which mostly is legal work around stuff the book which I have not read I have delved into it which mostly is legal work around stuff.

Yeah. Yeah. The book, which I have not read, I have like, I have delved into it. Yeah. And it is, it's,

and I hate to say this much nerdier. Like, it's like a lot of like Zork and D and D and like, you know, fucking like black tiger and rush and, you know, stuff that's like more like really like stuff that a lot of stuff that was left

in the 80s. And also in a movie you can have a dense image in which a character zooms by the screen quickly and you don't have to call attention to it. Yeah. And then in this you have to be like Bats Maru walked by in a book. You have to say it. You know? David is enjoying Bats Maru. Oh boy. And it you know david is enjoying that smart oh boy and like you know yes there are things that

we'll talk about such as like ultraman is in the final fight of the book and they couldn't get the rights to ultraman because the rights to ultraman are kind of like a fascinating little like story on themselves so they were like well warner brothers has the iron giant so yeah let's do that you know stuff like that happens and that's that's what happens when you make a movie. Especially a movie like this. But it's a movie in which society has fully crumbled because we have spent all our time just regurgitating the same

pop culture over and over again. Yes. Which the movie feels like it is. It is existing right on the sort of razor's edge of satire. Yes. And it's like, I'm sorry, I don't want to pay attention to any of that.

Right. Okay. Like, there's kind of a chilling Twilight Zone-esque, be careful what you wish for movie right on the edges of what this story is acknowledging. And I think any way the movie acknowledges it is accidental, is a byproduct of them having to adapt the material. Because I think he pointedly avoids interrogating any of the ideas that are kind of accidentally baked into the cake. Maybe.

All right. Well, this is a larger question about criticism, but I see a movie and I take away what I want to take away from it. But I think I agree with you that, yes i don't think spielberg is that interested in like interrogating how creepy a world like this is but the movie also does kind of end with this like very lame conclusion of like you know it's good to go outside once in a while that feels like that feels like spielberg like insisting on that that's not in the book but also good to go outside once in a while is spoilers coded with now i'm super rich i'm in an apartment surrounded by all the pop culture that

we used to indulge in the oasis and i get to make out with my hot girlfriend yeah good for him makes out with everything fuck everything and you're too mad about this movie i'm sick i don't want to talk about i don't want to talk about it I don't want to have seen it well you saw it I know and I wish I was in bed Ty Sheridan

cheer up cheer up come on I'm sick what do you want me to do cheer up this movie is a nightmare no it isn't

Griffin it's a gentleman's six exactly the battle toads are in this movie they are Ben liked that he shouted them out he said battle toads I got this movie they are ben liked that he shouted them out he said

battle toads i got excited when the fucking when robocop showed up for a millisecond and that was the only one of the pop culture things that gave me a semi i didn't care about any of that shit but i never care about that shit i just don't care okay like and i love the i'm the nihilist i need to cheer up no it's just like i just don't care everyone Okay. Like, and I love the Iron Giant. Oh, and I'm the nihilist. I need to cheer up. No, it's just like, Mr. I just don't care. Everyone is viewing this movie as a,

as a, Where do we find this guy? A battleground. And, you know. For good reason. I think, I think you have to view it that way.

Because of where we are. I'm sick of viewing every piece of pop culture as a, like, moral battleground. But, I guess that's a lot of truth. Not a moral battleground, but I think this movie, the way it reflects our times and where we are in the pop culture landscape and where we're going. This is exactly what I'm saying.

Every movie has to be this now. Or it's like, right, what does this say about the moment? And it's like, wow, this is a movie they've been working on for years. Okay, but here's a movie about yeah i know what it's about love of nostalgia yeah i know being the greatest currency in the world directed by the most powerful filmmaker alive right who's directing it as a sort of desperate plea for relevancy you think he's making a desperate plea for relevancy? Yeah. Why do you think that? Because he hasn't had a home run blockbuster in a while. I don't think he cares.

I think he cares. I think he wouldn't make this movie if he didn't care. Then why didn't he make Robo-pocalypse? That's less of a slam dunk than this. And I'll say this to you. I think one of the reasons he makes this is because he didn't make Robo-pocalypse. Well, yeah. I think he of the reasons he makes this is because he didn't make Robo Apocalypse. Well, yeah.

I think he wanted... I think I... Whatever. You're doing the thing that I don't like anyway, where I'm like, you know, it's like, he did this because... I feel like you're setting up untenable terms for us to discuss this movie. No, it's just like you're saying. Because you don't like it being discussed.

Because he was desperate for a hit. I think he just wanted to make a big movie. Like, it'd been a while since he made, like, an action movie. His last action movie is Tintin. Which didn't do well. But like his last real action movie is Crystal Skull, I guess. Which people hate. Yeah, it did really well though.

Yeah. So I'm saying he has one movie that's good that did poorly. Don't you think he just likes to sort of switch it up? Like, like, you know, I did a drama and I'll do a fun movie. Right. Like his line of thinking is interesting because it, you know what I think? It's kind of almost like when the band breaks up, that big band, and then they go back out and do a reunion tour, and it's just playing the hits.

Yeah, it's fine. This feels like a reunion tour. It's fine, but it's also like you want to see them in their prime, their heyday, or you want to see them age into a new era as a band. Which he's done. He's, you know, you can go watch. Yeah. Go watch fucking Munich or the Post or, you know, you can go watch late Spielberg, like

minor key Spielberg. But he wanted to make a blockbuster though, right? Right. Well, he's making a blockbuster. Yeah. But he's just borrowing like kind of retired old. Yeah. No, but no, no, no, no, no.

I disagree with you. It's different though. Cause he made, no one's ever made a movie like this period. This movie is crazy It's inside a video game And it has graphics that are completely mind blowing That everyone is just like I don't know it looks fine

Wait hold on one second Sit inside a video game graphics completely mind blowing Oh I think Wreck-It Ralph is on the phone He wants to talk to you Oh can I talk to him? Yeah Hey Ben it's me I'm gonna wreck it You're the best

It's not bad Riley for a cold, Ben, it's me. I'm going to wreck it. You're the best. That's not a bad Riley for a cold. Come on. Wait a second. Now it's getting Romano. Come with me into the Ice Age. I mean, Romano probably would have been a fine Wreck-It Ralph. Yeah. Would have been a different sort of rage.

Like more of a like Seinfeld-y rage. Yeah. Like Riley is good at like primal rage. I understand that you hate when i tie movies into everything else in the world no no it's more like it's like the psychology of spielberg he's a i think tough guy to read i think it is impossible to actually engage with this movie and not engage with those elements especially if we're going to talk about it for an extended period of time and not a fucking eight minute lights camera Camera, Jackson segment. Okay. Alright. Relax.

Beyond that though, I'm not talking about, I'm just saying it's like and I have to consume a lot of writing in my job and a lot of culture writing. Humble brag. I know. Yes. It's a huge humble brag. And it's like, I think that it's, I

in my review tried to discuss like how weird this movie is. but like i i just hate or i just i don't prefer to assign like the evil of fanboy culture which is evil and out there uh-huh like and saddle all of it onto the movie because that's just a lot for any movie to overcome and i don't think spielberg is someone who spends all day on twitter uh being a racist or whatever you know like you know does a lot of the things that these people do i agree with you 100 i don't think this movie is trying to feed the beast but i think there are two things going on right i think one there's a bit of sort of just complete ignorance as to the

landscape right now i yeah he, I think he thinks video... I mean, he's older than video games, right? Right. It's just a different thing for him, right? I don't think this movie needs to address Gamergate at all. Oh, no. No. Jesus.

But I think to make this movie and not understand how Gamergate... Imagine Spielberg making a Gamergate movie. But my point is, I think to make this movie and not understand how Gamergate has changed gamer culture is a sort of willful ignorance but that's another thing that's sort of the point I was making earlier it's like this book which

once again sounds stupid I haven't read it because it always sounded kind of dumb to me came out before Gamergate and like now they're making this movie and like it's afterwards sounded kind of dumb to me. Agreed. Came out before Gamergate. And like, yeah, I know now they're making this movie and it's afterwards. He's making the movie now. Oh yeah, I know.

But like, it's funny to think about how much things have changed in online fan culture in just a few short years. I agree. They made this movie last year, right? They like filmed it. Yeah. No, I think they made it in 2016

actually yeah cause I auditioned cause he was in post production I don't know if you know this I auditioned for Wade Watts I think I did know that I think I remember that yeah I was very stressed out I felt like I kind of blew my audition we were doing blank check we were doing blank check and I came in really depressed because I was like this was my big Spielberg shot and I blew it well

but I also I don't know if this is the role that you want I have no regrets now. Although I think this movie would have been fun to make. Probably. How much mo-cap was it, do you think? Is he there when they're doing that shit? 100%.

This was another at-bat for him to do the 10-10 thing, which I think he really liked doing. I think that's a big impetus for doing this movie. But, I auditioned for this. The casting people on it, Ellen Lewis was one of the best casting directors alive.

Famous casting director. Does all of Spiele's movies, does all of Scorsese's movies. She's like, when you're watching The Post and you see fucking Zach Woods or whatever, that's Ellen Lewis. Yes. So she cast vinyl. Right. And we were on vinyl,

so she brought me in for that very kindly because I was kind of in the atmosphere at that moment. In her atmosphere. Right. You got to get back in her atmosphere. You know, I... Scoop. Ben and I are leaning forward.

When we were doing our Spielberg miniseries I ran into her taking the bus and we talked about Spielberg and Scorsese for like a while and she was talking about she was trying to cast his the Pope movie

and the whole problem with that was that they never could cast it like they couldn't find the kid and she was like we're on like month five of not finding the kid. And that was supposed to be the next thing. I know, I know, and he tossed that. It was sort of supposed to be Ready Player One and the Pope movie. Right, right. And then the Post took that. It was Ready Player One and the Post movie.

Right, yeah. But she was saying, you know, it's the same thing with Marty and Stephen, her words, not mine, where she said, they develop a lot of things. They find a lot of stuff they're interested in and a lot of stuff comes close.

And she was like, I cast 95% of Silence in 2004. Yeah, I remember that. I remember some of the stars that were floated. In terms of all the Japanese actors. No, no, sure. She said, I went to Japan.

But remember they had the stars in place. There was a point where it was supposed to be, I think, Daniel Day-Lewis, Felicity Morehoff, and Gail Garcia-Bernal. That sounds right, yeah. And then it kept on shifting. It kept on going with three-name guys.

Benicio was one of the three guys at one point. I was about to say, it was always like one of the guys was Hispanic. And you were like, shouldn't they all be? Or none? They're Portuguese? I don't know. But she cast all the Japanese actors in 2004. And then when Scorsese was finally like,

I got the money. We're making it in eight weeks. Right. All but Ken Watanabe could do it. And they recast him with Ishii Ogata. But she was going through the same thing with that. But anyway, side tangent. She brought me in for Ready Player One.

Yeah, Ellenis is great she's a real man she's phenomenal um she uh brought me in for ready player one which was an act of kindness on her part but i auditioned for ready player one with my vinyl look right so you didn't look like uh a fresh-faced i look like a child molester i looked like a child i was gonna be kinder no don't be kind you look like a porn tech i look like a child molester i looked like a child i was gonna be kinder no don't be kind you look like a porn tech i look like a porn tech like the guy holding the boom mic yes i did and then later maybe you have some blow and you try and like you know talk someone into like you know hanging out or whatever it was like the dead of summer it was like 120 degrees and i showed up

and i was dripping in sweat which is like a bad look i like gained weight i had a mustache and sideburns and unruly mop of hair. We used to talk about Star Wars together in a closet. I looked like that. You looked like a pedophile. It was insane. I mean, my joke was that I looked like the only person who was simultaneously a pedophile and a

victim of pedophilia. You're a smaller guy. Right. I looked like an Oros Boros of sexual assault a human centipede I looked like a human centipede it was a bad period for me visually you're gonna cut everything we've said so far out

right Ben especially all the coughs start over the podcast the best part is that when we sat down Ben was like remember like we're just gonna kind of post this one raw yeah it's going up quickly we're doing a we're like so like child molester oh i've noted all of this it's none of this is going to bake it into the episode

fantastic don't worry about it yeah okay here we go hey david yeah you know these days you can get practically everything on demand like our podcast you can listen to whatever you want it's convenient for you so let me ask you this why are you still taking trips to the post office to mail letters and packages when you get posted on demand with stamps.com are you trying to be nostalgic yeah i mean is it retro you think it's a cool retro thing only 90s kids will understand i think that uh stamps.com which is a service we use and we will use for merch soon coming soon and we're of course just talking right off the hip right now. It's just something that's very convenient and helps you buy and print official U.S. postage for any letter or package that you use right from your computer.

24-7. It's convenient for you. And, you know, mail carrier comes and picks it up. You click, you print your mail, and you're done. Couldn't be easier. You buy and print official U. official US postage for any letter. Any package using your own computer and printer. Any mug?

Onesie? Mousepad? Do people still buy mousepads? We should sell mousepads. Maybe. I don't know. Isn't it weird how it used to be like I'm setting up and I need a computer and I need a desk and I need oh I better have a mouse pad.

Yeah, that's Spielberg's next movie. Look, you just click print mail and you're done. It couldn't be easier. Yeah, so you guys can use stamps.com right now. You can use the promo code check for this special offer. God, I have to write a check. They only accept checks. That's a bummer.

No, wait a second. You go to stamps.com before you do anything else. You click on the radio microphone at the top of the homepage and you type in check. Oh. And then you can get $55 of free postage,

a digital scale, and a four-week trial. And the digital scale is going to be so useful again for this upcoming merch because it will enable me and us when sending out merch

to just... Let's be honest, it's mostly you. Yes, of course. I'm going to be filming. You think I'm mailing out merch? I think Briff's going to mail out all the merch. All right, honest, it's mostly you. Yes, of course. I'm going to be filming. You think I'm mailing out merch? I think Briff's going to mail out all the merch.

All right, I'm doing all the work. Yeah. But it will make it really easy because I'll be able to weigh all of the items and then just have the postage printed right there and just send it out.

I genuinely have, in my entire life, found sending packages very daunting because of the weight thing. Yeah. And we have a scale now, and it's been great. And I'll say this.

You know, I love finding alternate uses for our sponsors' products. Uh-huh. You get this scale at home. Let's say you want to see how much one specific part of your body weighs. Uh-huh. Oh, how heavy is my finger? This is a great scale for that. Great.

Very helpful. So, yeah, once again uh go to sams.com click the microphone at the top of the home page and then type in check yep yeah and then you'll get 50 uh 55 dollars of free postage digital scale and four-week trial and that's how sick i am no time for bits dr jones so ready player one yeah i read this script in 2016. Did you read the whole script? I did. I was surprised they sent it to me. I'm surprised too. That's amazing.

Now, I feel like the draft I read was the one right before Spielberg came on. It was like the pure Zach Penn draft. Wait, but Klein wasn't involved early? I think Klein wrote the first script. Yeah. Because the credited writers are Klein and Penn. I am told and I am sure that other people did passes on the script and it's very different from the book like very very different from the book the general

plot structure is the same but the book is like completely I'm curious to see if I can find the email I think it was a Klein Penn draft that makes sense I think they work together Zach Penn who we were talking about off mic who's's a real boring, hired Hollywood cut. Hey, come on. He's my uncle. Oh, is he? No.

I typed in ready, and I got my Best Buy orders ready for Pico. What was it for? Last Jedi Steelbook. Don't at me, bro. You got a Steelbook? I got a Steelbook. I'm crazy about Steelbooks now. Oh, my God.

This is a real heel turn. A steel turn. I've already said this. I've been buying Steelbooks got a steelbook. I'm crazy about steelbooks now. Oh my God. This is a real heel turn. A steel turn. You already said this. I've been buying steelbooks like a fiend. I just want to make clear that when I said steel turn, which I thought was really funny, I hit Ben with my hand. Cancel our show. Cancel our podcast.

Griffin, he wrote- Occupy blank track. Now that's a real 2001 flashback. I know, right? 2011. Only 2000s kids will understand uh 2010 kids will understand boy i feel bad for the 2000 teen kids yeah they're gonna have trouble being like man wasn't it great in the 2000 teens when um let me check this donald trump was president oh wait a second when all of our seminal pop culture was reboots of other generations pop

culture man uh the very problem but that's what the star wars is in the 70s culture was reboots of other generations pop culture. Hey, man. The very problem. But that's what the Star Wars is in the 70s. It's reboots of 30s pop culture. Hey, Rampage is an original idea, though. And I'm very excited about it. Because Big has never met Bigger before. Would you say that with Zach Penn and Ernest Cline, Big met Bigger?

Yes, 100%. I don't have the email anymore. I just want to say someone pointed out It's too bad that you don't have the email. Right. Like, the big difference between

Force Awakens and The Last Jedi Sure. Right? Is that like Star Wars was Lucas putting together a pastiche of all

these different things he grew up with. Yes. And blending into something now. Because whatever adage you want to use there are only six stories, this and that. A hundred percent. No, I'm not.

Right? Force Awakens, a movie I like. Enjoyable. Still don't defend. Right. Is a movie about Star Wars. Absolutely. Whereas Last Jedi is like its own thing. Oh, yeah. But we're still playing in the same sandboxes as opposed to like mixing and matching elements. I agree. I mean,

I'm not saying, like, Hollywood's got some you know, looking in the mirror to do about some of the shit I agree. I mean, I'm not saying like Hollywood's got some, you know, looking in the mirror to do about some of the shit that's coming down the pipe. And not just Hollywood. I think all of media. No, I think that it's just Hollywood and everyone else is blameless. Yeah.

By the way, what's number one in the TV ratings? Oh, Roseanne. The biggest premiere of the last 10 years. Pretty much. We have to go back. Sure. the biggest premiere of the last 10 years pretty much we have to go back sure what I was gonna say you read the script

I read the script it was pretty shortly after he'd been announced as the director I think Zach Penn and Ernie Klein wrote the script together but the notion was always

how are they gonna fucking make that movie they won't be able to clear the rights. It's impossible. It's unadaptable. And then when Spielberg signed on, they went, oh fuck, it's Roger Rabbit. He's going to be able to call in the favors and get all the different properties in

here, and he's going to be able to get the carte blanche, or the black check, if you will, to make this film the way he wants. I remember reading this script, it feeling like, despite the structural changes to the material, a pretty straight adaptation

of the messaging of the book. It kind of went in one ear and out the other. I went, okay, cool, I got it. I feel like I kind of sped read through it. Because I even went, Spielberg's going to take a strong, strong fork and knife to this thing Spielberg's going to take a strong, strong, like, fork and knife to this thing.

Yeah. He's going to chew it up and spit it back out and turn it into something different. And I'm surprised by how much this film is kind of in line with that. Maybe it's just the previs. Like, maybe it's just like, at a certain point, you need to lock the script. I don't think it's that. I think it truly is. I think there were two things he was interested in doing here.

One is, I think he's been moving towards more adult fare. Sure. Right? So he wants to... His blockbuster movies haven't worked as well. He hasn't had one that's an unqualified Jurassic Park type for the fans and the critics movie in a long time. Yeah. I don't even know what you call it.

I mean, more of the worlds, I guess. I don't even, those were like device of films that was, he was making his big Spielberg blockbusters, but they were dark and haunted and post nine 11 shadow of the towers kind of stuff.

Right. Right. Um, I, I think he wanted to just do a crowd pleaser. I don't think it was out of like, that's what you're saying. It's a movie. He was like, it's not a film. It don't think it was out of fear of have I lost my mind.

It's a movie. He was like, it's not a film, it's a movie. That was his selling point. But I think he picked this property that to him felt like path of least resistance. It's fun. Just like a fun grab bag. There's nothing to deal with. I also think he really liked the Willy Wonka elements of it.

Yes, yes. Which he seems to really engage with in this movie. Yes. And he put a lot of time and energy trying to get Which he seems to really engage with in this movie. Yes. And he put a lot of time and energy trying to get Gene Wilder to play Halliday.

Then Gene Wilder died. Gene Wilder died after saying I don't want to do this. Fair enough. But he died right on the cusp. August 2016.

Right. I think Gene Wilder in this movie would have been really depressing. A because clearly he was in a very feeble state at that point.

Well, yeah, he had Alzheimer's disease. Yes. It's sort of hard to imagine. And B, I just think seeing Gene Wilder talk about space invaders. That's not what he did, though. He didn't do that. Right? What?

Gene Wilder. He didn't do that, thank God. He didn't do the movie. Yeah, it would have been horrible. Right. But the good thing happened. Right. The best performance in the history of cinema, Mark Rylance.

The best thing happened. But the point was he wanted to put that final point on it and be like, I'm literally making the Willy Wonka movie. I'm going to have the old Willy Wonka in the computer. I get what you're saying. My only question is like, how is that possible if Gene Wilder has had Alzheimer's disease? I just, i can't figure it out i think spielberg went to him and said like i think i can do this with you i think

i can work around you and gene wilder was like i really don't think i'm well enough to do this all right yeah at the time i was very disappointed because gene waller's one of my favorite actors i wanted to get one last performance. Didn't know he was terminal at that point. Right. His last film was Another You. Yes. Which is... Never seen it.

Bad. It's with Pryor, right? Yeah, it's the worst of the Pryor Wilders. And Pryor's like all fucked up. Bad. Right. Yeah. Yeah.

Funny About Love. Do you like that? No. No, that's the Leonard Nimoy one. It's bad. Do you like See No Evil, Hear No Evil? What? Really?

I love that movie. That's like one of my favorite cable TV movies from a kid. I think that movie is an entertaining cable TV movie. I have a feeling it would feel a little gamey watching it now. I'm trying to find your last favorite. Is it like Stir Crazy? How far do I have to go back to find a Wilder performance you love? See, I've never been a huge fan of the prior Wilders.

Do you like Haunted Honeymoon, which he directed? I've never seen that one. What about The Woman in Red, which he also did? Yeah, I mean, I like Woman in Red. I like World's Greatest Lover, Sherlock's younger brother, you know? I'm trying to find if there's an 80s Wilder. I guess there isn't. I don't think there's an 80s Wilder I love.

Panky Panky? Gilda Radner. Yeah, I think those movies are fine. I guess there isn't. I don't think there's an 80s Wilder I love. Panky Panky. Gilda Radner. Yeah, I think those movies are fine. I think those movies are fun. I like him so much that I enjoy watching any of them. I think the prior Wilders don't age very well. Yeah, they don't. I think they're really good together.

I don't think those movies are tremendously good on their own. Stir Crazy. Stir Crazy is pretty good. It's fine. Yeah, it's like pretty watchable. And I think everyone forgets that Silver Streak, they're only in it together for like 15 minutes uh i've never seen prior is very much a small supporting role in that film right and once they saw how good they were together they added a couple more scenes it's interesting to look at wilder's filmography it's so short

like it fits onto my whole screen like the whole filmography and it's weird to think that like by the time he makes Young Frankenstein he's already sort of like there's nothing better following it. You know what I mean? But then what's weird is that Like where does he think of that as like oh he's only going to get crazier you know. But he's one of those guys where

his films that he directed were pretty successful they were like doubles or triples and the prior movies were huge. Well of course. No I know they did well. I'm more saying like doubles or triples. And the prior movies were huge. Well, of course. No, I know they did well. I'm more saying like, it's like... In terms of the canon.

Yeah, and I'm also just realizing like, for some reason I thought like, Young Frankenstein was before Willy Wonka. You know what I mean? Like, I had this image of prior as like, he does the Mel Brooks movies and then he's a superstar and then he does the prior movie.

You know, like... No, and Blazing Saddles and... Those are before too, yeah. Blazing Saddles and um before too yeah or the same year which is crazy that's insane that just that's just insane which is insane uh my mount rushmore though is like wilder keaton keaton both diane and michael michael and Buster fair throw Diane in there you could have three Keatons Diane and Philip Seymour Hoffman

those are like my guys those are Griffin's guys those are my guys it's not like he says those are the four greatest actors in the world they're just Griffin's four favorite actors

and I also think that literally everything I've ever done is me trying to combine those four people I just rewatched Spider-Man Homecoming,

which is fine. Keaton's so good in it. He's so good. He's amazing in it. But I think I steal most of my moves from those four guys. Yeah, okay. But Wilder, right. We had fun there for a minute there, talking about Gene Wilder. He isn't in this movie. He's not in this movie. He's poignantly not in this movie. He cast Mark Rylance, who's his new favorite actor.

And Mark Rylance gives the most interesting performance in this movie. And the one element of this movie that i think is kind of subversive yeah this i mean it's it's a great he's the one guy kind of really wrestling with shit in terms of what this movie's saying as soon as he shows up with those baggy jeans straight leg jeans and just his body language it like transported me back to being a kid and seeing weird adults at a video game store. It's just like, what's wrong with that? Why?

The other- Guys at the comic book store. Yeah. The weird thing with this movie is because it takes place in the future, you have Mark Rylance playing an old man who grew up on stuff that you knew. You know Mark Rylance didn't grow up on. Right. Mark Rylance's character was obsessed with stuff that was at that point

like 30 years old or whatever that's how far in the future we are maybe even 20 years I actually read that there was actually a script that had references to more recent pop culture

like aka future pop culture like there were going to be references to movies from like, aka future pop culture. Yeah. Like, there were going to be references to movies from, like, the 2030s and shit. Yeah.

And they decided to take it out because it just didn't make sense and there was no way to do it without having to explain it too much. Like, they tried and they failed, which is weird to think about. I'm going to jump way ahead

because I don't know if we're even going to, like, do the plot on this episode. You don't want to talk about Gunters? Yeah, I want to talk about the Gunters. Egg Gunters. They're called Gunters.

It's a weird name. Gunter, for a second here, I thought I was at a central park. Drink your tea. Gunther. Or is that your raspberry coffee? No, it's a hibiscus tea. I got it from Dunkin' Donuts. Dunkin' Donuts, fame for its hibiscus tea. Look, desperate times call for desperate measures.

What did you want to jump ahead to? What was the thing you wanted? I think there is, talk about the elements of this movie where I'm not saying like the movie is problematic because it doesn't address this. Sure. But I think the movie-

The movie is a little problematic. I agree. And I also think this movie is kind of sort of like pointedly playing with bumpers on. Like it's using the defense of like, it's fun. Don't think about the rest of it.

That's what's the problem. Right. Those are every problem this movie runs into. It's because it's just sort of like, well, there's nothing to see there, right? Like, ah, who cares? It's like dancing in front of a fire. And it's just sort of like,

I mean, the way I put it, it's like Spielberg's like, the future is hell, but like, we could still like have a good time right we literally stop building new stuff because we keep on praying at the altar and this is why I was so fascinated by this movie the whole production phase because I was like

there's no way he doesn't grapple with that right he doesn't really grapple with it and to be clear we held out hope that maybe he was going to make a super subversive Verhoeven film. Right. But even there's a midpoint between the two that's like a movie where he still gets his happy ending, he still makes it a surface pleasure, but he at least sort of like pays service to all the larger ideas

that are circulating in the atmosphere right around the story. Right. But I think the problem is they're not circulating in Ernie around the story. Right, but I think the problem is they're not circulating in Ernie Klein's atmosphere. No. And that's the problem. It's like if he had, and by the way, this is Wikipedia, so take it with a grain of salt.

The way they put it is Klein wrote a film, wrote the script, then someone called Eric Eason, who I've never heard of, rewrote that script. He's like, he like wrote A Betterwrote that script he's like he like wrote a better life I think he's just one of those Hollywood rewrite guys and then Zach Penn rewrote the script so is that when Spielberg came on yes like because Ernie Klein I feel like it was

the first Zach Penn draft that I read Ernie Klein wrote this script before the novel even was published like you know like because this this book book was optioned before publication. They were just slam dunked. I think I read the Zach Penn draft that got Spielberg to sign on. That's what it feels like. I remember Zach Penn being credited on it. It felt very much like this. It had the same amount of narration

in the opening and all that sort of shit. What I was going to say is there is something to this movie that this is me extrapolating from it, but I think a more probing filmmaker or a filmmaker who wasn't just concerned with fun, because Spielberg's clearly capable of tackling these things, and you go, this wasn't in Ernie Klein's ecosystem. Well, that's what's interesting about adaptation. You get someone to take someone else's work. Exactly.

And look at it with new eyes. Right. And come at it from new angles. That's what I like about adaptations. Of course. If they go right, yeah. So something like The Godfather, which is like. Totally.

A mediocre book. Yeah. That Coppola was able to go like. A shitty, pulpy book. Right. Oh, there are bones here. Yeah. Where I can throw some other flesh onto it.

Right. But like Coppola has always been very upfront about like, that book's kind of gross. Right. Like, yeah. But I think Ready Player One's kind of gross. Yeah. Not ill-meaning, but kind of gross. I haven't read it, but it seems lame.

Sure. And there was hope that Spielberg as a very intelligent man would want to sort of bring some more stuff into the picture. But Gunter's though. Gunter's. So what I was going to say is. You read the script. We're still on this.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is me jumping to the end. Oh, okay. Yes. What you wanted to write. This movie is getting at something, which to your point, you're a critic.

You look at the final product. You take away what you want from it yes death of the office I don't think this movie has anything to say about this the notion that you know

there is a certain type of dude who succeeds and rises to the top and becomes a gatekeeper and that person gets to sort of those people in their positions get to choose the canon. They get to define the canon

and go, we all love Back to the Future. And that suddenly has more cultural weight than everything else. Because the executives at the top of the heap right now are the people who grew up with Back to the Future. And a lot of those people who rise to those positions

come from similar backgrounds and have similar taste and this movie is a story about one of those examples to the extreme a guy who creates a game changing technology that is totally a monument to his favorite

pop culture and everyone else in the world has to bend to his tastes and show reverence to his favorite pop culture because he's the one who wrote the book, right? Right. There's a thing I want to see in this movie, which is a greater sense of democracy, especially in like the end battle where like...

Yeah, everyone's just whoever they want to be and they're all right. You go like the Lena Waithe character, right? H. Right. And she's like this sort of tech wizard who can build or fix anything. Right, right. Right?

And she builds the Iron Giant is like her big final play. Yeah. Which it's like, aside from the fact that it doesn't really fit with the time period. Sure. What have you, right? But it's also really cool because it's big. It's big, and he's a nice he's a nice giant yeah and we'll never talk about him again on this podcast never how dare you how

dare you um never not in our worst episode ever no no never never yeah um you i want some character in this movie to go yeah you know i don't really like this stuff, but it's like, you gotta play the game. Because everyone's like, oh, man. But, no, I, of course. Fucking the Goonies are the best. The whole movie. And you want someone to be like,

I don't know, I feel like this stuff's kind of overrated, but I'm just trying to win this game. And there's a part of me that wants, like, some characters, especially at the end, after he gives his big speech, and is like, everyone, let's storm the kingdom. Yeah, right. Where he's sort of like, be whoever you want to be. Right. And you have speech and is like, everyone, let's storm the kingdom. Yeah, right. Where he's sort of like,

be whoever you want to be. Right. And you have people who are like, I love fucking noir movies. Sure. You know? I'll be fucking Joe Friday from Dragnet. Right.

That's who I would be. Yeah, you know? Like, you just want to see this like a democracy of pop culture. Which there, I mean, there, I guess there is, I mean, again,

I don't even really look at the mob but there you know you catch glances of battle toads and overwatch characters it's all probably if you freeze frame it like a bunch of shits in there. You have overwatch characters and you have different things but it's all the same

sort of gatekeepers tastes I mean you're talking about the monoculture. That's what I'm saying. But the monoculture is largely defined by... I know. So in a movie that's literally about that kind of gatekeeper creating his own world where he defines the monoculture,

don't you want to at the end where the idea is that this thing becomes a little more democratic and it's given back to the people, go like, you know what what actually I love romantic comedies I'm going to be Tom Hanks in Sleepless in Seattle and I'm going to storm the castle right

but I mean I didn't see I didn't see Jared Leto's Joker I know in it

and this movie does not get twisted enough actually sadly true what you're basically saying is this movie needs to be more twisted I'm going to eat my cheddar bagel twist while you throw out your counter. No, my counter is basically like, this is not a movie about a happy future.

No. And the idea of a future where everything is based on pop culture references and every video game is just like a countless echoes of other video games and all that shit is like so plausible yeah and like it's like a harrowing dystopian exactly and if that did happen 60 years on yeah people probably would just be like well what i love is uh battle toads like like scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, you know. And so I think I can't even imagine this movie ending

in a way that's not a bunch of references. But don't you at least want to see that movie be a little tongue-in-cheek at the end with, like, I don't know if this is a good thing or at the end try to break down that wall a little bit. I'm not saying the entire DNA of the film has to be rewired, but the last ten minutes, isn't that what you ultimately

want to get to? It's like, maybe we should stop reliving this antisocial nerd's favorite pop culture from half a century ago. Yeah, it's just a different movie. Just a dude who never formed a life for himself, just lived in his head with all the shit he does. No, no, that

is what Spielberg's getting to. Yeah. But what he's not getting to is the pop culture part. What he's getting to at the end and what this quest is designed around, right? Because the idea of the game is that Mark Rylance's character, I have to look up his name. Halliday. Halliday, who designed the Oasis,

which is a virtual world that everyone plays a big game in. He died and his will essentially is like, you have to solve this quest and find the keys and whoever finds the keys gets the game like he'll bequeath you the game if you will his will wonka it's it's it literally is just the willy wonka thing except willy wonka is dead and is now just like a cyber avatar in the game in the recorded messages right and the the the purpose of the quest right is to understand that his life was perhaps a little too devoted to all this and right you know uh it got a little meaningless for him and he misses his

friends and so how do you how do you win the game you have to be super devoted to his brain you prove that you're the best person in the world by knowing all the same stuff that he knows that's the inherent flaw of the client story it's very strange although i think it's fascinating like to do a memory play essentially i just don't think it's like uh endorseable i agree but then you go shouldn't this movie at the end come to a point where instead of it landing on a sort of glib like oh the friends we make along the way are what matter. Yeah, right. Let's just take breaks on Tuesdays, guys. Don't you want it to come to a point where you're like,

maybe we should stop praying at the altar of all this stuff? But that's, I mean, nothing in this movie is going to do that. You're just talking about another movie. I'm talking about a better version of this movie. I'm not talking about a complete alternate reality version of the film. I know. This is a fight we have a lot, though. And it's a fight that I always reference the Scott Ackerman joke. Like, I love West Side Story.

I just wish they didn't do any singing and dancing. Like, you know, the old joke where it's like, when we were talking about this with Isla Dogs, where we didn't get in a fight on Twitter about it. No. We, like, went back and forth, and at no point were ever disagreeing with each other. And I told you you'd return.

You did, which was very mean of you and I was upset. Look, I mean, we have to address, some things have changed in the last couple months of making this podcast and David now has an insatiable hunger for turds. Where it's like you were saying, I mean, the movie should just not be set in Japan.

It's a turd world problem. Oh, God. Yeah, I think the movie should just not be set right and i agree with you but also i'm just like but then that's just a whole other movie and like i don't understand at what point wes anderson decides this movie his dog garbage movie needs to be set in japan because in the interviews that i've been trying to parse right he always just sort of says like and then we decided like well what if we merge it with this homage to j that we've been thinking about? And I'm like, why did you decide that? He never really provides an explanation.

But that also speaks to... But that was the genesis of that movie. But it's also the difference between you and I and how we come at stuff in relation to our own careers, which is like, your job is to look at the final product. I'm like, here it is, you've given me this, and I will now think about it. Right, and I'm always trying to figure out how to make things better because I'm someone who's like why isn't this working you know?

Either because it's my own thing or I'm on set saying shitty stuff and I'm trying to figure out how to make it better. Not on set of The Tick the scripts are good. Every other thing I've ever been on. Well let's imagine you had been Ty Sheridan whose career we are now going to discuss.

He was discovered local talent scout. He's a Texas boy. He's a Texas boy, local talent scout. He was born, and this frightens me to say. In the year 2002? In 1996. Oh, that's much better than I thought it was going to be. He's 21 years old.

And he's been in movies for a while. I thought he was born after 9-11 i thought you were gonna scare me with that because he's he's you know that he then he'd be like 17 i wasn't doing the math in my head right right uh he was you're right he was discovered in texas and he was in the tree of life as the not interesting character he's the brother who dies uh-huh he's not's not, is it Hunter McCracken? Yeah, he's good in that. Very good. And didn't really act again. So neither of them were actors, right? They were discovered by local town scouts. Terrence Malick poignantly just wanted like

real Texan boys. Right. Like, the legend goes that when they cast him, neither he nor his parents had heard of Brad Pitt. He was that far outside of the sphere that when they cast him, neither he nor his parents had heard of Brad Pitt. Yeah. He was that far outside of

the sphere of pop culture. Right? But he sort of acquits himself as this good, naturalist, young actor. It's not like you watch The Tree of Life and think, like, oh, that kid's gonna pop.

You think Hunter McCracken might pop. But then he becomes the first actor to have movies play at the Cannes Film Festival three consecutive years in a row. Because he was in Mud, which he's very good in, I think. And then he was in Joe. Joe, the David Gordon

Green movie with Nick Cage, right? Right. He's above the title on that one. Yeah. Now, Mud's the one I think he's really good. He's quite good in that. And Joe, I don't know. Right. And you get the sense that I believe Nichols is friendly with Terrence Malick, and David Gordon Green is as well. All three of the people

you just mentioned are friends with each other. Right. They're all like poets of the high prairie. So you imagine that Terrence Malick said, look, this kid doesn't have a lot to do in the movie, but I'm telling you this kid's a pro. If you want to cast a naturalistic southern boy, this is a good kid to cast. Right? But then he goes from that to like

scout's guide to the zombie apocalypse playing cyclops and the x-men and then being the lead of a spielberg movie it's kind of a fascinating career because his whole thing was just that he was sort of like a natural kid you know he was also in last days in the desert and i'm told he's quite good in that like he made some more indie movies as well. He's in the Stanford Prison Experiment. The other one he's good in is the one, the Neil Hamburger movie. Oh, Entertainment. He's very good in that.

I've never seen that. I think he's a good actor. It's odd that he became... I want to say something a little mean about him. I don't think he's very good in this. Oh, I don't think he's good in this at all, but I also think it's a terrible character. I agree. Seriously, had you gotten this role, I don't know how's good in this at all, but I also think it's a terrible character. So like, I agree. Yeah. Like seriously, like had you gotten this role?

Like, I don't know how you have fun with this role. I don't either. It's such a boring ass character. I don't either. And if I had fun with it, it would result in a movie that everyone hated. Right. Or you being immediately fired. The ways I would keep myself entertained would be really, really upsetting to the general public.

But, um, I think he's got like a funny face he's got a funny face it's and it's weird because he was kind of a handsome kid and he's in a weird i don't know if it's just a weird transition phase where his like features are settling oddly but in this movie he's got a funny face yeah and i just don't want to be mean about it because i even think he was handsome in x-men yeah like i can like here he is as a kid you know yeah and he's like a cute kid yeah but and now it's like yeah he's got this sort of like and erotic kind of wide face i don't know how else to describe it he's just sort of funny looking but he's good at reacting i'll stop being he's good at being sort of steady what do you think ben about his

face yeah yeah he looks like he's got a big head fair enough he did a lot of movies where it's him reacting to older actors right and he's good at that it's sort of just holding his own

I thought he was a pretty good Cyclops although that movie didn't get me anything to do I can't I literally don't even remember anything he does in it

I think he fits the Scott Summers mold but that film doesn't have that character do anything I've always said there's one guy who should have played Scott Somers,

and now he's too old. Who is he going to? Timothy Olyphant. That's who I want. It's weird that that's your one guy. That's my guy. I've always thought that is the guy. Say you made an X-Men series that began in 2000

and was still going on to this day. Hypothetically. He would be good as a young Cyclops, and he'd be good as now like a veteran Cyclops he's so perfect for it interesting like cause you need

someone who is angry but like is good at sort of like you know tamping down the anger cause Cyclops is such a weird boilingly

angry character and uh you know usually the movies have just interpreted him as like he's the annoying straight guy who like says what the rules are now that you're saying anger you know why I movies have just interpreted him as like like he's the annoying straight guy who like says what the rules are now that you're saying anger you know why i think could

do it well army hammer yeah probably he's so handsome but yeah yeah but you cover up those eyes sure well sure and i feel like army hammer is really good at it's a boiling anger he's good at hating the fact that he's boring uh for sure. He's good at playing characters who are like, I resent the fact that you think I'm basic. You know? Yeah. He'd be a good Cyclops. He'd be a good Cyclops.

He could be a good angel too. He could play like half the X-Men. Especially the early X-Men. He'd be great Havoc. My favorite X-Man. Maybe we should get Fincher to do a Winklevoss-style Armie Hammer plays the entire X-Men. All the Summerses, at least?

Yeah, sure. Fine. Sounds good. Armie Hammer plays Cable, Cyclops, and... I mean... Wade Watts, Ty Sheridan's character, Parzival. Right, whose name... I don't mean to say his name all sneery, but...

But then they call him Z, because there's a Z in the middle of his name. This character, who I'm sure is even more insufferable in the book, is the worst. He's the worst. There's zero reason to root for him. He's a know-it-all, and that's all he's got going for him, is that he is a

know-it-all about a particular guy's life. And he's kind of... That's his him is that he is a know-it-all about a particular guy's life. And he's kind of... That's his skill. Boring. He doesn't really have a fire in his belly. No, I understand why he's boring. He grew up like in a shipping container in Columbus, Ohio, and he spends his whole life in a video game. But also like so same with everyone.

Right. And they're more interesting. Which is what's annoying about this film is the only reason he's the protagonist is because he knows more about this stuff that Ernie Klein has decided is the greatest power in the world. Yes, but also just because the pop culture he's inspired by is about all these bland people on Hero's Journey surrounded by a more colorful ensemble. That's what every piece of pop culture that he's doing,

that Ernie Klein is ripping off, is inspired by. And that's what this character is. He's doing like that he's ernie klein is ripping off is inspired by and that's what this character is he's just like the the the hero by the very design of this movie they could have completely redefined who the protagonist of the film was because once he gets into the oasis he presents himself as a very boring generic i was about to say hero's journey character he picks his art uh his avatar right as like i don't know an anime boy with like fucking billy idol hair like that's it right like so don't you want them to try to find the weirdest kid they could possibly find to play the role yeah but they they don't they don't do

enough digging into that and again i think the book does more digging into that in the book they're far more different from their avatars. And this year, like, he could have played Parzival with makeup. Yeah. You know? Agreed. And Olivia Cooke, who I think is a great actor and I think is solid in this movie. I think she's excellent in this movie. I do too, actually. She's a great actor. She is like a really exciting talent. She's the real deal.

Yeah. Everything I've seen her in, she's been the best thing in it. But you also get kind of bummed out that it's her. What do you mean? mean well because it's like the whole device of like i think in the book she is physically like i think she's very overweight or she's i don't think so maybe she might be handicapped different excuse me did you see her in this movie she She's hideous. Well, that's the point. She's got a birthmark. She's fucking disgusting. She's got a birthmark.

Ben, would you agree? When I saw... She's like, you wouldn't want to look at me. And I was like, oh, she's probably self-conscious about her hair. I can't believe this movie skirted by the ratings with a PG-13. You see her. That's an NC-17 media. I threw up immediately.

Well, that was the thing. I was eating my salad and I threw up all over the place yeah she's got like a birthmark on her face she looks like incredible like i don't know like she's gorgeous she's got like a red spot on her eye like i don't know and like the whole thing of like she's very like gerard butler in the phantom of the opera where she's like don't look at me you wouldn't like me if you met me in the real world it's like what you're not an olivia cook type um yeah but no i but even even with all that said and it's mockable the birthmark thing movie's better if she's the protagonist movie's better if um leticia right yeah protagonist she was cut out uh movie's better if lena waithe

is the protagonist movie's better if like you see leticia right in the background of a shot for one moment i want i want her to be in the background of a shot for one moment. I want her to be in the movie. But I think when Olivia Cooke shows up and she's like, I'm fucking Trinity. I'm a radical. Here I am. You're like, why aren't you the hero of this movie? You're interesting.

As an actor and as a character. We're not even saying that to be contrary. It's like the movie is crying out for one of them the movie makes no argument for way being the guy at the center of the story he's nerdy about the um fucking holiday i keep forgetting his name uh holidays right life history which we talk about the way culture shifted right you imagine that this movie exists as some sort of like masturbatory fantasy of like all the shit that i love that has no value in the real world i'm gonna write a book where that makes

me the most valuable person alive uh sure yes but for that movie to come out now you're just like okay fucking get over it relax coming from two guys who became best friends by going to movie trivia talking and dunking on nerds all the time. Exactly. Like, I just, you just feel like you want the movie to seed control. You want the movie to, at a certain point, when he meets up with Olivia Cooke, IRL go, oh, you know what? This isn't about me.

You really need to win this. I'm going to help you win. It's just, whatever. I'm just some fuck boy who knows shit, you know? That's what he is though. Like she's a more interesting actor and a more interesting character as written. Percival lives in the stacks.

It's a, it's a fucking trailer on top of a trailer. Yeah, it's in Columbus, Ohio and, uh, the world is shit. Right.

The world looks like Carl's Jr. Sandwich. I keep on making Carl's Jr. sandwich I keep on making Carl's Jr. references I dunk on him we're trying to get our our sponsorship yeah we want to get

we're trying to neg Carl's Jr. into sponsoring us um he he's Parzival his best buddy is H who we don't know is

is Lena Waithe who's fun who's fun in this movie very fun she's my favorite character definitely I like her avatar too like uh I like the um is Lena Waithe. Who's fun. Who's fun in this movie. Very fun. She's my favorite character. Yeah. Definitely. I like her avatar too.

Like, I like the midsection. Yeah, it looks cool and I like that he stretches out but he can sort of inspect her gadget his way out of danger. If I'm eight years old,

I want that action figure. Like, that's cool. I like the stretchy. Yeah, Merchandise Spotlight. There must be some toys. Yeah.

But it's also like... Spielbergers. Spielbergers. So, like, Funko made the toys. Yeah. And they have, like, a set of the three keys. Sure. And then they have a box set of action figures.

Okay. Sort of in the mold of the old Star Wars figures. That's just the four. It's H. It's Parzival. It's Artemis. Is that her name? Artemis, yes, with an E.

I mean, with a three. Right. And then IROC. IROC is the T.J. Miller character. Right, which we'll get to that. But the other thing is... I kind of like the design of IROC, though. I do, too.

The other thing is they made a bunch of Funko Pops for this movie, which is kind of ingenious because then it's like the entire Funko Pop line is essentially a Ready Player One line. Sure. Like you put any fucking character next to Parzival and it's like, all right, it's that scene. Hey, you know who else is a great character?

Blue Apron? David. Yeah. Tell me more. This is beyond sweaty. You're into this is, you know who's a good character? He said, you know who's a good character? Then he said, David.

So I answered that Blue Apron is a good character. He flicked his sweat onto you. Sorry about that. Look, Blue Apron's a great company. And do I wish they would make a character? Yes. They should have a mascot. A box. Is there like a person who wears a blue apron in

like a piece of pop culture? Swedish Chef usually wears a white apron. I think he has a stripy apron, doesn't he? Well, it goes through different permutations. He's done striped. He's done solid white. Well, do you think that Swedish Chef would like the kind of meals that you can cook with Blue Apron?

Yeah, I think Blue Apron should hire Swedish Chef as their spokesperson. Sure, that sounds like a not expensive proposition at all. No, and he's also so good at just speaking, communicating basic messages. Messages like, you know, Blue Apron is a leading meal kit delivery service in the U.S. And while many people know what we do, many just don't know about the types of meals you eat when you cook at Blue Apron. Like, yeah, quick bucatini with broccoli and pecorino cheese.

Short rib burgers with a hoppy cheddar sauce and a pretzel bun. Italian style shrimp and sweet pepper. I actually made that one last week. It was really good. Yeah, you know. I make like two or three of these a week. i have like gone full in on blue apron you could do it all in under 45 minutes without trip to the grocery store what i like about it and i'm this is off i'm not really like it's like i i'm a good cook but like i always cannot be bothered with like using

the remnants of my cooking to like make a sauce or stuff. You know, you know, like that looks sort of final. Sure. Act of making a meal. And Blue Apron, like the way where they're always just like, all right, now you've got, you've got a pan full of meat juice. Like pour a little of this in there. Make a roux. Stir it around.

Hey, buddy. Sure. Hey, buddy, you got a stew going. Yeah, we got it. Only 2000s kids will understand I'll say also like I'm about to start filming and last season I ate horribly cause get home it's late

let me just grab a fucking burrito or whatever you know but it's like the idea of having this stuff delivered to me on a weekly basis and I can just like pick the nights I feel like I have enough energy to make it and when I got my first shipment I was like I'm a very picky eater right and I got it and I was just like pick the nights I feel like I have enough energy to make it. And when I got my first shipment, I was like, I'm a very picky eater. Right. Yeah.

And I got it and I was like, oh, this sucks. They sent me a dish with broccoli in it. And I was like, wait, no, but I'm making it. Right. Hold the broccoli. Well, fair enough. You know, or you could eat the broccoli. It's good for you.

I'm not going to do that. Please. It's off brand. He's a picky eater. Well, all right. So anyway, you have a certain like, you know, you get to remix the culture a little bit with Blue Apron. You get to be your own Parsifal. That's all true.

You get to pick two, three, or four out of the like 12 recipes every week that they have on offer. They send like non-GMO ingredients on, you know, the meat has no added hormones. The meat's always really good. It's actually something that's impressed me about it the most. And this is coming from a meat lover. I mean, what do you think of the meat? It's really great The meat's always really good. It's actually something that's impressed me about it the most. And this is coming from a meat lover. I mean, what do you think of the meat? It's really great. It is actually really good.

It's really high quality. All right. But so I'm interested. How do I be this character? All right. Blue Apron is treating blank check listeners $30 off their first order if you visit blueapron.com slash check. So you check out this week's menu. You get your $30 off visit blueapron.com slash check so you check out this week's menu you get your $30 off of blueapron.com slash check it's blue apron it's a better way to

cook cool no time for bits dr jones so back to ready player one yep uh so wade uh work lives in the oasis uh earth is hell. He goes on a race. There are three keys that you need to find. Each key comes with a clue for the next key to ultimately lead you to the Easter egg, which is a literal egg that will grant you ownership of the Oasis. Which is worth half a trillion dollars.

Right. It seems to be everything. That's a funny bit when he goes half a billion, half a million. Half a million. I wish I could do his voice. Sorry, trillion. He's so funny trillion he's so

funny he's so funny in this movie that scene near the end where he's like fumbling for the key yes his avatar is like you want it right like everything he delivers every line even if the line isn't like that great on the page it's just like hysterical there's also the image of him with the white wig that lawson our buddy Dickie Lawson has been posting forever. And it's so much funnier in the context where you realize he's delivering that from inside a coffin! It's so weird!

He's lying dead with coins on his eyes and he sits up and goes, Oh, hi, I'm dead right now. And the coffin is, I believe, a Star Trek torpedo canister. He likes Star Trek. He likes everything. Look, I believe, a Star Trek torpedo canister. He likes Star Trek. He likes everything. Look, I'm just saying there's a world where this movie is fascinating.

Because these are the people who make the things we're obsessed with. I think if everything was as sort of... I think Rylance, his performance is actually digging in. Yeah, I think Rylance his performance is actually digging in yeah I think so I think it's like here's a guy who literally only understands pop culture

he is the least well-rounded human being in the world exactly and his big realization as he was dying was that right and

like that's the lesson he's trying to impart and I think he plays that with the appropriate vacancy right the appropriate inability to interact and connect right and with the appropriate vacancy, the appropriate inability to interact and connect, and with the lingering sadness and loneliness.

But also, and speaking to the Willy Wonka thing. I wish the rest of the movie was as smart as his performance. Speaking of the Willy Wonka thing that you're talking about, though, that's what Willy Wonka's about, too, where it's like, he's like, it's a world of imagination. I live here. I have no friends.

I only have Oompa Loompas isn't it great and charlie's the one who's like this is scary yeah this is very weird right and the other kids are like i want to be rich you know like and so the other kids in this movie in ready player one are ioi or the evil corporation right sorrento sorrentino uh his name is nolan sorrentohn. The great Ben Mendelsohn, who's fun in this movie. I think he's fun. I think he's fun in this movie. I think he's fun because he's playing him as a coward. It is always surprising when I see a non-sweaty Ben Mendelsohn performance, because he really

started landing hard here as his sweaty, wormy guys. And he's good as a guy whose vein is pulsing right here. Yeah, he's really good at that. Right. And the cigarette is like his mouth is so sweaty the cigarette won't stay between his lips. Like he's got sweaty teeth.

And we were talking about his lisp. It's like a very, very, very slight sort of speech thing. But I like that he just owns it. Oh, totally. Even when he's playing really together high status people like this. Yes, like this. That having said, this guy's kind of like just a weak-willed. Not weak-willed.

Would you call him a hater? Spineless. And a fanboy can always spot a hair. He wants to turn the Oasis into like a cell phone game, I guess. There'll be like ads. He wants to make it a freemium thing right and he heaven forfend he uh probably is good because then everyone would stop using the fucking oasis yeah and try to i don't know plant a tree or something exactly he goes save the dead

earth move to the andes and raise my son but at the same time even though i just made that joke that's what i like about this where wade literally has some line where he's like we're just trying to enjoy ourselves before we die that's all the oasis is for us like we know we're doomed like he basically admits it like this is just the only fun we can have okay he admits that directly in dialogue and the performance never reflects that no the performance doesn't really because there's so much fucking explaining in this movie, too. I understand there's a lot of table setting. Sure. But Spielberg's someone who's pretty good at elegantly offering exposition.

Or even figuring out how to set things up visually. Yes. Sometimes doing the Mr. DNA info dump where it's like, you know what? I just need to do three minutes where a cartoon explains the whole thing to you. Yeah. This movie, they never stop explaining what's going on and there's the moment where they set up the sort of fake they make sorrento think that he's back in the real world but he's still in the oasis and then it cuts to them right at the computer screen and wade literally explains oh so that's cool sorrento

is and you're just like we get you just have to show us the two screens which are literally labeled i know i know i felt the exact same way that's like one moment that i harped in on but there are like but that's the worst one though where it's that's the worst i know where we get it and then he's like wow so we hacked into the mainframe and he's he's not in he's in the oasis right now like and here's the thing that's the used that used to be the thing where Spielberg would gracefully subtly

pan his digital camera across to those two computer screens you would see the two images and it would actually get a laugh out of the audience you'd go that's clever and that's pretty graceful and by just explaining it you're just like oh my God. Can I order another cup of tea, please?

You know? I'm flagging down my fucking Alamo waiter for a cookie platter. Which those cookies were very good, weren't they, man? They were awesome. They look good. You guys got some cookies. I got some cookies. Yeah, they look pretty nice.

I had a burger. To paraphrase Corky Romano, we guys wanted some cookies. So they go on the race that's the first big set piece which no one's been able to beat and he keeps on

going back to the archives where you get to watch every single moment of Halliday's life when he was building the oasis with Simon Pegg

who at first you're like this is a weird small role for him to take a wiki role I also recognize his voice as the curator Pegg is playing the curator This is a weird small role for him to take. Right. A wiki role. I was like, when's Peg showing up? I also recognize his voice as the curator. Yeah.

Peg is playing the curator who is the sort of Dr. No of this movie. There's nothing he doesn't. Oh, K-N-O-W. I thought you meant Dr. No. No, I'm talking about Dr. Kno. There's nothing he doesn't. There's nothing he doesn't. Who's giving a lot of flat facts and so on.

I did love the look of the curator i did too i actually i like all the curated parts i like that that to me is video gamey in a way that's fun like i yeah if this movie wants to be video gamey then great you give me a race i think the race scene is basically fun like it's a yeah i mean cool set action action pieces in this film are well executed i think the race is maybe the best one except the lesson is so corny what's the lesson it's like you gotta go back oh well that's like don't participate i mean again i hate nitpicking because like i understand that the plot has to work the way it works like very basically but like someone would have fucking gone backwards we've all played like donkey kong you go backwards see what's that way but forgetting that

Monty Lozik friend of the show past and future guest who's not allowed to talk about Spielberg on this podcast but carry on was talking about being dragged to see the movie and she was like I'm being dragged in backwards and I was like haha backwards that's a plot point and she was like

are you fucking kidding me backwards is a plot point yes it is gotta go backwards you gotta go backwards no but i also i was just gonna say there's there's that kind of video game where it's like you have to figure out some weird logic puzzle through conversation i like that that's fun i like that it's in there like the curator i think he's a chill bro and we could hang out yeah griffin's rolling his. And I think he could stand to be a little more enthusiastic about the curator. Excuse me for being sick. It's not funny.

The race is kind of cool. He gets the coffer key. He also gets, it's a Great Angels in America reference. He gets it at the Bethesda fountain. Right. Great Angels in America reference. Only 80s kids will understand. Angels in America is actually the 90s.

You just go like, save for like the occasional thing like King Kong, you're like, none of these things are that meaningful to Speely. Is it meaningful to anyone? Like who fucking, yeah. I mean like,

I'm saying like, she has the Akira bike. If Edgar Wright Made this movie Yeah It would at least be The pop culture That he grew up with Right

But like Edgar Wright Made this movie And it's Baby Driver Or whatever right It's like Edgar Wright's Good at making these Kinds of movies Like he made Hot Fuzz

Right Right It's just like a slightly Less irritating version Of that idea Where it's like Well I'm gonna reference Lots of things that I love

And yeah it's fun Yeah I think his version might have been a little more interesting than I think it is as someone who didn't like Baby Driver. Baby Driver's good. I can't believe that's the one you like. That's the way,

out of what? What's the, you know, that's the one out of... You're mezzo-mezzo on a lot of the rights. Yeah, my right ranking is Scott Pilgrim number one, for sure.

Like, that's his masterpiece. World's End number two. Baby Driver three. I think World's End's his masterpiece uh world's end number two baby driver three that's a great movie baby driver three uh sean four hot five insanity people get really mad about that because sean the dead's great and baby driver is sean of the dead is a movie that i cannot deal with the turn it takes i just don't think it lands it the to to true horror oh i love that right and i i want to love it like intellectually i just don't think it lands it. To true horror. Oh, I love that. Right.

And I want to love it. Like, intellectually, I like that it's doing that. But every time I watch it, I'm like, I'm still, I'm not prepared for it. It's too nasty to,

like, suddenly. But that's the thing for me is when it makes that turn because it's been a comedy up until that point, I get more scared watching Shaun of the Dead than I do most horror films, which I think is impressive. It unsettles me.

I agree with everything you're saying, but I just finally was like, you know what? I think I just don't like that. Anyway, the point is, every time one of these things gets dropped in, any time there is a needle drop, which we said there aren't too many, I'm just like, Spielberg's like,

this is what they want to hear, right? This is the stuff that they like which just makes me a little depressed but it doesn't have as much as I thought it was going to have. I thought it was going to be like a just an orgy of it. Just like it would be the Toontown sequence Roger Rabbit. Exactly or like

an episode of Family Guy. It was just going to be like ha ha ha and instead it's mostly Parzival the great Parzival, the great Parzival. The great Parzival. Navigating the Oasis in cool ways. He goes on a race. He figures

out the race. That's cool. He goes backwards. He meets Artemis. He saves Artemis once so she takes notice of him. She sees him going backwards. She's the second to get the key. He tells H. H tells their other two friends, Saito and Sho. Daito and Sho? Daito and Sho.

Who are like a samurai and a ninja. They're Japanese. Yeah. And they're very well-developed characters. Very thought through. Yeah, exactly. One of them is 11, and the other one is also Japanese. He's handsome.

He's very handsome. Win Murasaki? Yeah. And the other one is 11! Yeah, he's 11. He win morisaki yeah yeah and the other one is 11 yeah he's 11 he makes a big fuss about that win morisaki who plays the um the older one dido he's like a big like j-pop star oh really he's like a hot shit in japan he's a handsome guy i like the design of dido yeah but but now it's sort of all of them working together it's a big point that they don't clan yeah because one of the rules of this thing is if you die you respawn but you lose everything you've ever collected exactly so it's like you can live in the game

forever but if you die all your coins spill out of you and all your weapons all your what have you exactly and um they don't want to clan because i guess they're all selfish i don't they never really it's just i think they just don't want to like conform i assume the clans which we don't see are just like boring clubs i don't know right right because yeah i mean like sorrento's got like an entire it's like the um this is my favorite part of the movie farouk assault like the dad hiring the people just unwrapped candy bars all day exactly right and but it's like it's all it's very dickensian he has like these people in like debt servitude right like he buys up their debt he's a debt collector and then they have to like work it off by like doing virtual work which is so weird

where he's like plant that virtual bomb there you know like you know go build me some roads it's such a like oh it's so crazy i wish the movie had more about it yeah Yeah, I agree. Why are you so mean? To whom? Me. My best friends. Shut up. Fuck you. Should I eat some turd?

Yeah, eat a couple turds. Eat two turds. Eat the turds. I can go get some more chocolate kisses if that's what you're thinking. No! Gotta eat a turd. I don't... Okay, fine.

I eat the turd. Okay,'t, okay, fine. I ate the turd. Okay, thank you. Was that so difficult? Was that so hard? So the second quest is the Shining quest. Right. It's kind of fun. Well executed.

Yeah, really well executed. I feel like this homie's well executed garbage. I mean, he does a really good job of approximating in what is a digital set. He even replicates the the the textural look of the lighting and the cinematography of the shining very well so yeah it's fun again yes i agree with you it's a little garbage they start to realize the key to this whole thing is that it's like writing the wrongs of his holiday went on a date and he didn't have the courage to

make a move and then simon pe married her instead and the Shining thing is actually just them living through the date and everyone else would get caught up in the Easter eggs and the Shining references and really it was just about having the courage to ask her to dance. I just wish the Spielberg showing up to direct this

movie was the 2000 sci-fi trilogy Spielberg. The Minority Report ai who is like you know anything it's just it's the you know for one he wrote ai right and minority report that's a scott frank script he had cruise which gave him a lot of leeway i'll take a fucking scott script scott frank tom cruise combo over zach penn and Ty Sheridan you just wish like have Joe Cornish do a pass

have like whoever do a pass you know I mean I think this is the inherent flaw of adapting the book like it's like either you just

fuck up the book so entirely that it's a different thing and then maybe Ernest Cline is freaking out I have no idea like who was dug in where

but he should have just done something different maybe but like if len wiseman wanted to make this film they would have said like hey you can't piss off ernie you got to stick to the book if spielberg's doing it's like do whatever the fuck you want or find another it is very different joey was saying like his crowd was like they didn't do this part right and apparently i rock is not is in like half a sentence in the book yeah

i rock in this is like the bounty hunter character sure who is like a fucking angry gamer nerd like he's the kind of guy who would throw the n-word at you constantly the character he's playing and they make him really just kind of like inoffensive and funny he's just comic relief he's rumbling he's tj miller so even for the moment he talks he's kind of jaded but exactly you are kind of like inoffensive and funny. He's just comic relief. He's rumbling. He's TJ Miller. So even for the moment he talks, he's kind of jaded, but exactly. You are kind of gritting your teeth about it.

He wants to talk about how badly his neck hurts or whatever, you know, like the joke, right? And you're like, this guy would have more of a sense of being an aggro badass. You need, you need more edge to that character.

Just a lot more. You can't make him inoffensive. Yeah. You can't. It's just out of touch. But everything in this movie is kind of inoffensive.

But that's out of touch. Right. But, you know, Spielberg, to his credit, and this is to his credit, he's not on Twitter all day. Good for him.

Hey, look, to his credit, makes him a better human being, I'm sure. Wish he had voted March Madness, but other than that... Maybe he started a dummy account

just for March Madness voting. And voted for Breast. And then when Breast was out, he pitched a fit. He went full Gamergate. That was it. That was the tipping point. Yeah.

He initiated Gore Protocol. Exactly. Yeah, no, I mean spielberg one assumes steven spielberg has played a video game in his life he said he was one of the first people to own pong yeah but that's when he got up when he was like hey i'm a gamer i owned pong i love the man and i'm sure that that was an adorable grandpa moment from him but like when pong came out like he had made jaws like he was famous and rich right and he had the money because it cost like half a million dollars to buy a pong cabinet to buy a fucking cabinet it cost half a million dollars how much do you think he had a pong cat yeah he had a pong cabinet and like

spielberg has many kids right and he was the star of that weird movie making video game in the 90s oh right and i'm sure he's produced other games he has there's a weird blocks game he produced so like he started producing games in like the late 2000s and none of them really connected but like god knows that spielberg has very little grip on what you're talking about with the t.j. mill character. He's also one of those guys who talks a lot about, like, I don't think video games are going to replace movies. A video game can't make you cry. Like, he just kind of views

video games... He's old. I mean, I don't even need to be mean about it. Like, it's fine that he thinks that. I don't care. Because video games have made you cry, right? You cried The Last of Us. 100%. The first game that really got me, and of course, yeah, I mean, I'm not crying at Super Mario World, even though it's a masterpiece of art. I do think that game is, Super Mario 64, sometimes, I don't know if it made me cry, but it felt

very melancholy to me. That game felt very sad. Super Mario 64 is very melancholy because it's- Very lonely. It's about you walking into an empty castle. Right. And like, there's something weird and haunting about the castle there's no one there yes that i always got depressed playing super mario 64 for that reason yeah and the music was

kind of sad and you're just jumping into paintings right whereas like super mario world which is my favorite of the mario games uh is not it's a 16-bit game but like it has like this sort of beginning semblance of atmosphere like there'll be levels you enter where there's like a little fish flopping around that doesn't hurt you and when you levels you enter where there's a little fish flopping around that doesn't hurt you. You're like, oh, that's a little choice someone made where it's like, let's kind of set up what this level's going to be. It's beyond

just obstacles. This is the one I was thinking of. He made a game, Steven Spielberg Presents. It's literally called a Steven Spielberg game, Boom Blocks. Sounds great. Weird little blocky animals it's like a puzzle game I'm annoyed that I knew

exactly how that was spelled without even 100% Mark Mothersbaugh did the score and it was it was sounds good

yeah it was for the Wii sure and for the N-Gage yeah well the Nokia N-Gage only 2000s kids understand the N-Gage and I think people said only 2000s kids understand the N-Gage. And I think people

said it was fun and it didn't sell well at all. Fair enough. Like, they were like, this game's really dorky. It's clearly, like, made by a grandpa.

It is a really good game. And then they made a sequel called Boom Blox Bash Party. And I think that was the end of him

doing video games. Well, you know, Boom Blox wasn't going to make anyone cry. That's true. Yeah. But I was also going to say, the first game I remember making me cry is Wind Waker.

I don't know if you've played. I've never played. When you say goodbye to your grandma at the beginning of Wind Waker is deeply moving. Far Cry gets me every time. Like going to Van Jones to the Adventure Containers. I know, like I love Ocarina, but it's not really a crier, but Wind Waker.

So the third quest. The Shining quest is kind of fun. I like that H doesn't like horror movies. The one time someone isn't into pop culture. You haven't seen The Shining and she's like no. Now we go into the movie knowing that Lena Waithe is H.

Because we're well-read men of the film blogs. Right. It does take a while to reveal that. It happens in the last 30 minutes or so. 40? Last act, yeah. Is in the last act the real world's a little more important? Yeah.

Because Wade's aunt and uncle, who are sensitively portrayed, get blown up. You killed my mom's sister. It's weird. It's a weird line. Yeah. Yeah, so, but in the last act they all meet in irl him and olivia cook and lena waithe do you think even if you don't know that lena waithe is in the movie and they're not hiding her from the marketing no she's got a poster she has her own character poster exactly the the voice modulation is so weird that you have to know there's going to be some twist

with that character. The character presents male and then you find out it's actually a woman. Right. H is still the best character. I agree. Almost by default. I mean of the high five.

No question. Which is their fun group. Excuse me, you didn't think that was a cool name? Griffin. part i mean of the um of the high five no question uh which is their fun group well excuse me what you didn't think that was a cool name griffin all right more like low i don't want to get i don't want to get fucking charged up right now five for me there's five of them yeah yeah ben and i just high-fived hey guys did you know that griffin is sick i just threw my glasses on the table and i'm rubbing my temples so the final So the final quest is like playing an Atari game and like only

true 80s kids understand that in adventure you win by not playing the game. There's an Atari and there are a thousand games and they can't figure out how to beat any of them and they keep on beating them and you fall through the ice. And that's again to Spielberg's credit kind of or the script's credit, or whoever.

Like, that quest is literally like, only true nerds will understand this, right? Yes. But the movie kind of skirts around it by kind of not having the quest be that important. Well, because Sorrento- Because other shit's going on. Sorrento is trying to get them in the real world. Has gotten there with Iroq. They have some thing, some force field around it.

Right. It's a magic spell no one can even get in yeah so Parzival does his big like this is our time

yeah he broadcasts on all channels I mean this I agree with you because like this is where the Spielberg movie should be like revving me up

right like this is your fun last act instead I'm like I'm like thinking as he gives this big speech and I don't care about this guy I'm just sort of thinking like I big speech and I don't care about this guy. I'm sort of thinking like I hope the final battle's fun.

Maybe it'll be cool. You never get emotionally invested in this movie. Iron Giant? Right. And H has been building the Iron Giant the whole time and now she has it and he stomps around. Yeah. And people were like I read some people being like how dare they pervert this character because

the Iron Giant doesn't want to be a weapon and i'm like have you played video games that's all they fucking do is yeah i mean i think it's kind of funny in that way exactly it's very apt and also let's not be precious about our pop culture right like if you know if we if we want to criticize ready player one which is too precious about its pop culture to their very faint credit they don't have him go into gun mode. Yeah, no, it's not like he turns into a nuclear weapon. It's just that he's big and he's able to step over people and stomp on things.

He shoots like a cannon at one point. That's about it. Yeah. And then like Dido's on the plane and they're like, Dido, what is it? And his eyes are closed. And you're like, is he about to do something insane? And then he just turns into Gundam.

He just does the same thing everyone else is doing. He turns into a thing. The Chucky moment I thing everyone else is doing. He turns into a thing. The Chucky moment I kind of enjoyed. It's fucking Chucky. Yeah. I like Chucky. He's funny. I love that franchise. And it's funny to throw him out in that sort of setting because it

You know what the whole thing reminded me of? And there is literally a holy hand grenade. It reminded me of worms. You know how worms in the later editions of Worms they would be like, let's have more weapons of worms. Yes, it feels like worms. You know how worms in like the later editions of worms, they would be like, let's have more like weapons that are just references. It feels like worms.

And it's right. So it's just like one guy's like, I'm going to use my Chucky now. Right. But there's like the moment. Did you like Chucky? Yeah. Who was the guy that you,

I leaned over and I said, that's you. And you were laughing. I can't remember who, some nerd. I don't remember. It was like one of the techs at the like,

you know, there's a redheaded guy. You're probably being mean. I don't remember who. Some nerd. I don't remember. It was like one of the techs. That's a red-headed guy. You're probably being mean. I don't remember. Ben thought it was funny. Meanwhile, Griffin's like sucking damn tea. Yeah, I was sick. I heard somewhere you're holding this against me as if it was a choice. Because you get so mad about being sick.

It's so funny. Griffin, you're saying that you're sick? Okay, guys. I didn't realize this at all. Guys, Griffin. You're saying that you're sick? Okay. Guys. I didn't realize this at all. Guys, I don't want to disrupt the flow of the podcast, but there's something else I've been keeping secret

that I have to tell you guys. What's up? Logan is secretly a Western. What? Oh, my God. Also, Deadpool knows that he's in a movie. No.

Stop. He does. And he knows that his FX show just got canceled. Oh, should we pitch the Deadpool thing? I think we should. Yeah, we're going to take over the Deadpool cartoon. So here's the idea.

Deadpool directs a movie. They were doing, guys, just FYI, they were doing this for like 20 minutes last night. The whole ride over to the theater, we were just doing Deadpool. Like they would not drop this bit. And then they were being mean to me because I had a bit about sexy texting

that they didn't think was funny. It was not funny. and go fuck yourself. My bit is that I'm going to start a Twitter account called NotDeadpool, and I'm going to get it verified because it's going to be like, yeah, you can verify that I'm not Deadpool, but the secret is that it is Deadpool. And the first tweet's going to be like, LOL, definitely not Deadpool. This is Twitter, though, right?

This is a tweet. Because the thing with Deadpool is you've got to address the frame around the picture. Wait, what's this? What is he doing with that hammer? Oh, he's breaking the fourth wall. That's what he's doing. I think it's a good bit. Deadpool knows that he's in a movie that he's in a movie

I don't check that off check that off the list yeah Deadpool's uh gonna have a movie that comes out and I think it's in

it's in mid-May Deadpool 2 correct that is certainly going to make more than this movie yeah it's just crazy to think about that

like 10 years ago no one would have said like wow I meanielberg can have his fun but like the real crown jewel of the summer is going to be deadpool 2 and also tj miller will be in both of those and it'll be more awkward for this no for the it's more awkward deadpool because he actually is you see his face they could have totally redubbed him in ready player one they could have that's true with him in Ready Player One. They could have. That's true.

With very little effort. That is true. And probably gotten a better performance. My only question is, like, what the contract shit. But probably, right? Because I assume he did a mocap performance, right? Yeah. But, yeah, they could have easily redubbed him.

But I'll even say, like, yeah. What's going to happen to the mucus guy, though? I think, didn't they already? Oh, did they fire him from Newsmax? I think Manzoukas is the mucus now. I mean, Manzoukas is great casting for that. I'm good with that. More like Jason Man-mucus.

Hey. Man's mucus. You know what I watched the other day that's okay? What? The House. Oh, I've heard that. It's okay. It's much better than I thought it was going to be.

You know my movie like that. What? I think Snatched is low-key good. I haven't seen that. I think Snatched is really dark and low-key good. Yeah, interesting. Also, Christopher Maloney is the business in that movie. He's a good actor.

He's got an incredible three-scene Michael Shannon in the Night Before-esque performance. I mean, obviously, I'm referencing it because Manzuka is sort of the secret star of the house but that's more just like a classic like third me. He was meant to be the Galifianakis. He's very funny. Right. But I honestly think Farrell and Poehler are funny in it. Like it's a 90 minute movie that feels 15 minutes too long

but it's still pretty funny. And it's like a good movie about like just how broke the middle classes like we're like they all have nice houses and jobs and still they're like why do i have no money why is sending my kid to college crippling i like that it's like rooted in real shit like that it's such a weird idea yeah i guess they're like i guess let's have a casino. I guess that's the whole movie. Okay.

So the third act is they do the Atari thing. Right, they got the thing. They storm the castle. And look, I just want to say one thing. Yeah, go ahead. We transfer make sharing big files easier than, I don't know, storming a castle to get the final key. No sign-ins. No avatars.

No offer codes. No password to forget no cost you just upload the file you send it and you get back to making whatever it is you make such as solid gold podcasts i thought we were going to do a bit we went back and forth and i would list a real thing and you list a ready player one i know but then i just sort of like got hooked by what we transfer actually does here's the thing we transfer is all about making the creative process easier for everyone everyone they built their site to be the simplest way to share big files around the world for free um you know i've i've used other file sharing things in the past and you gotta log in you gotta like you know attach an email account or something get out of here with all that stuff. There's no sign-in.

There's no sign-in app. No offer codes. No password to forget. Just upload. Send. Get back to making what you make. Like making that sweet love. 40 million people use it every month

to send and receive files. They devote 30% of their ad space to showcasing creative people from around the world. It's like people like musicians, photographers, or podcasters. Yeah. You know, so in that spirit, we're skipping the rest of the 60-second ad and getting right back into the podcast.

Too sick, too phlegmy, no time for bits, Dr. Jones. WeTransfer.com. You make WeTransfer. There we go. So they break in. How do they disarm the thing? What do they even do? Well, it's like there's this, you know, and it's a funny video gamey thing.

It's like IOI has bought like the best weapon, which is that shield. Oh, which kills everybody. Oh, no. There's also that, right? The bomb. First is the magic force field that you can't put down. And then there's the bomb that kills everybody. Right.

And it's like, right. Why would these things even exist? But video games always have some item where it's like it costs like a bajillion dollars. And you're like, well, no one would ever play the game that much. Right. Why would these things even exist? But video games always have some item where it's like it costs like a bajillion dollars. And you're like, well, no one would ever play the game that much, right? Wrong. Ben made a face. These fat cats, these corporate fat cats, they'll play

it that way. They take down the, you know, Artemis takes down the shield because she's on the inside. But Artemis has to sacrifice like she's the fucking sacrificial lamb. I know, it's annoying. So Wade can win. Who fucking gives a shit about Wade? Well this is the whole thing. It's like all the battling happens whatever whatever. It looks fine. Spielberg's okay. But like that's

the thing. At the end of it all the big moment is Wade and Rylance in computer attic world. Right. That's the emotional crux of the finale. Everyone gets wiped out. Yes. for wade who has an extra life because the curator gave it to him so he's back on the board sorrento thinks well i'm gonna lose but no one's gonna win so who cares right

and then he's gonna shoot them in the face yes with a gun irl right but that he doesn't do that because he's a total coward but you you get into fucking, you know, Rylance, I never made friends, you know. I don't know. It just feels... I think the attic scene

is kind of amazing. I think it's very well acted. It's well acted. I think it's very patently written. Yeah. Sort of

the problem of the movie. I think the whole thing is so surfacy. He is so uninterested in grappling with anything going on in the fringes of this story, in the nooks and crannies, underneath the surface. And it's frustrating because it's like all

there. Like you have a movie that is, because of what the source material is, an amazing vehicle to actually do a like, this is the state of our world now movie. And I don't think it has to be a self-hating movie. I don't think it has to be Starship Troopers.

I think you can still have uplift at the end and let the hero win. But I think you make a movie that just brings in some of the stuff. And I think Spielberg, A, doesn't care, and B, isn't keyed into it. Yeah. And that's a bummer. He has this childhood self in this scene right like you could kind of talk about how he's a lonely kid he had a bad upbringing there's like he's like yeah that's me but i almost like how like i i think i said this in my review but there's like this weird idea where

it's like i think i think spielberg's a little keen into where he's like, you gotta remember the people that make the things you love are weird shut-ins. Like, as I was. Like, Spielberg was that kid. And, like, there's this line he has that's so not profound that I think is from the book where he's like, you know, I like games, but reality's the only place you can get a decent meal. And it's like, you hear what he just said, and you're like, well, what?

That doesn't mean anything. That's like bullshit. That's nonsense. Reality is the only thing that's real is the other thing. Well, that's even more spat, as you put it. It reminds me. But I think Spielberg's just saying, remember, these guys are weirdos.

How do people poop and eat in this world? That's a great question, because he mentions, apart from bathroom breaks, everyone spends all the time in the Oasis and I was like where's the bathroom? I don't think there's running water.

You could presumably I mean just shit in a bucket while you're in the Oasis and your shit goes in the real world. Does it look like you're shitting to people

in the Oasis? With your haptic suit can you have like a haptic butt? That's the thing like early on in the movie he doesn't have the full suit. He just has like the gloves and the thing he gets a coat with like a digital catheter

i don't know ben does it these are questions i have like watching this movie just felt for me like some ironic twilight zone twist ending of the movie i thought i wanted to see when i was 13 yeah you know it's like congratulations pop culture is everything you see when I was 13. Yeah. You know? It's like, congratulations. Pop culture is everything you wanted when you were 13. Now, have fun heating yourself. I want to play the box office game now. The prediction game. The burn it down, move to the Andes.

But as, no, you're not going to the Andes. I am. The show's canceled. I'm moving to the Andes. And delete all episodes. Guys, if you don't like that idea, please tweet at Griffin to not move to the Andes. No Andes?

Should that be the hashtag? Yeah, sure. No Andes. Guys, did you know that he's sick? Wait. Please. Is Griffin... Are you not feeling well?

Let's keep this quiet, okay? I don't want this to blow up too big. Here's my question. And this is my transition to the box office prediction. Here's my question. What's the point anymore? What's my question and this is my transition to the box office prediction here's my question what's the point anymore what's your question Griffin

it's fun to make the show yeah this movie threw me into some existential dread Jesus um this movie

is doing better way better at the box office than people anticipate yeah it'll do well no no but it was tracking at 35 it's opening to 52.

That's a major increase. Do young people want to see this movie? I think... Are they actually into this? I don't know. Because this is a thing where literally not even Warner Brothers estimates, but all studio estimates were like,

it doesn't look like it's going to do that well. And now they're surprised. That's my question. Is it front-loaded by 80s kids and 90s kids and whatever? Or like actual kids? Because I'll say like the beginning of this movie when it's sort of just like jumping through the oasis, I was like, this feels like the best visualization of what VR could become.

Right. And how it could be an exciting, all-encompassing medium. Right? Like The way he cinematically shows VR feels like you see the allure of that kind of world. And that's certainly a hook for kids, but it's also so

bogged down in all the self-referential stuff. I was on a comic book club, which is a very good podcast. Hosted by Peter Page, Alex Albin, and Justin Tyler. Three great guys who host a weekly comic book talk show. Okay. And they like to discuss the new comic books, the new things on the stands that week.

Yeah. And like four of the comic books we were discussing that week were in some ways mashups of older things. Yeah. It's like the landscape now is like Gwenpool and like Gwenum, which is if Gwen Stacy was Spider Gwen. Right. But then also got attacked by a symbiote, then she'd be Gwenum. This is why I stopped reading Marvel comics five years ago, because I just

couldn't follow it anymore. Well, this is my point. There's a Thanos comic where it turns out that Ghost Rider's actually the Punisher. And it's like, all of it is like, Marvel's always been into the legacy of these characters, where they're mantles that can be picked up by different people, right? They're different generations of these

heroes. But now it's literally just become, what if it's this guy and this guy at the same time? Right? What if you took half the iconography of this character and this character? And I said to them, like, every time I hear about one of these things, people go, Spider-Gwen, and I go, fuck Spider-Gwen. I'm not going to read something called Spider-Gwen.

That sounds dumb. And then people tell me it's actually really well-written. Because there are exciting new writers, and this is the thing, these are the franchises. And I go, me it's actually really well written. Because there are exciting new writers and this is the thing. And I read it and I go, it's really well written, but wouldn't I be more excited by this if it were totally its own thing? And isn't it

kind of depressing that you're not offering new entry points for kids to form relationships with their own new characters? And there are exceptions. Like Ms. Marvel fucking rules. Right, there are things that are genuinely exciting and new. But so much of it, and Marvel NDC is a sort of mashup regurgitation

thing, and I just wonder if, aside from kids wanting to seem cool because they get the things that the gatekeepers have told them are important to get, and we certainly live in a culture where it's easier now to have a 101 basic knowledge of

anything by spending 15 minutes on wikipedia right do they care about any of the stuff that this movie is referencing i don't know i don't know my question i was just surprised at the take at the 12 million thursday i mean i'd love to see some sort of breakdown of the ages and i'd love to see their ages are up there you can find them how it plays for the next couple weeks yeah because I could see this not multiplying well I could see it doing fine well it has very little

competition next week yeah so it'll probably do okay then Rampage I don't know it's going to be bigger yeah so maybe that'll slow it down

number one is going to be Ready Player One it's tracking around 50 52 number two will be Pacific Rim no Acrimony probably the Tyler Perry movie oh right which is looking like is going to be Ready Player One. It's tracking around 50-52. Number two will be Pacific Rim? No, Acrimony, probably.

The Tyler Perry movie. Oh, right. Which is looking like it's going to open at like... 2021? Yeah. It doesn't have one in a while. Low teens, high 20s. It's going to gross all of Proud Mary's gross in a weekend. Proud Mary is...

We don't talk enough about what a fuck-up that movie is. I know. Well, that's because no one bothered to see it. I saw it in theater. Someone tweeted the gif of William Hurt

and History of Violence saying, how do you fuck that up? It's a good point. But that's really what it is where it's just like, that's an on-base single at least

and instead it's like, it's like they hit themselves in the face with the bat. Right. Anyway. The other ones, I feel like you're going to have Pacific Rim Uprising, you're going to have Black Panther.

Maybe Black Panther jumps above Pacific Rim this weekend. I think Pacific Rim will drop harder. And then I can only imagine that's a thing where it's like, that might grow. That movie is now just such a phenomenon. Isn't there another Faith one coming out this weekend, but it's not going to be as big?

Another what? Faith film? Oh, God's Not Dead 3. Right. Those don't do very well. Because we already have well, the first one was big. Right, but you know.

But we already have Paul Apostle, Christ is in the bottom of the 10. Jesus Christ. And everything. Movies suck. Fuck everything.

God's Not Dead made 16. God's Not Dead 2 made 20. Like there's a steep fall off. Yeah. You know. Yeah. 60. Jeez.

God's Not Dead. I know. I was in a movie theater and my friend said, is that a real movie? Pointed to God's Not Dead poster because it doesn't have a three in the title. It just has a subtitle.

Uh-huh. He says, is that a real movie? I said, no, is that a real movie? That's the third in a series of real movies. A Light in Darkness. Okay, great. John Corbett's still in them. movie i said no is that a real movie that's the third in a series of real movies a light in

darkness yeah okay great um john corbett's still in them is kevin sorbo still in them i think he died because he's the villain he played the professor who's like god is dead right and like some brave soul is like what if god isn't dead and he's like straight to jail and he's put in jail i have cancer i don't care anymore fuck the world yeah right because certainly we should make movies where people have cancer are the evil what i hate are atheists um so the universe is canceled this is the last episode of anything ever i'm sorry that ready player one was the one to do it broke me i'm also sick i didn't want to see the movie. And he's just sick, guys. Oh, you're sick? Yeah. Don't tell anybody.

Guys, Griffin was sick, but the thing is, we've recorded so many great episodes of Blank Check, so we can't cancel, because there's so much great stuff coming in the future. Yeah, we're banked up through, like, August. Exactly. It's really exciting. This is the second-to-last episode we're recording before I go film. That's right.

We're going to do one more after this, which is going to be a nice, happy final recording. It's one of my... Because it's a movie we adore. It's a movie I've literally been begging to do an episode on since the beginning of the show. One of the three movies that were the first movies that were thrown out in the brainstorming session. When we weren't even sure if we were going to do miniseries. When we thought we'd maybe just do one-offs. It was one of the first things I ever pitched.

I remember that day I walked into the UCB offices. Yeah. And you pitched me the Shyamalan idea. That was an idea you had come up with independently. Yes. Yeah. I was kind of the holiday of that situation. Right.

And then I almost immediately countered with, we have to do the Wachowski second. Yeah. Because they were sort of my baby. Right. And you were like, only if we do Sense8. That's the Yeah. Because that was like, they were sort of my baby. Right. And you were like, only if we do Sense8. That's the only mistake we made.

And then we thought we'd get canceled. Yes. I guess we should mention at the end of the movie, Simon Pegg shows up and he's an old man now and he's the friends you make along the way and what have you. Yeah, at the end of the movie. They're the high five,

they take over. As we said. And he goes, I closed the Oasis on Tuesdays because real life, it's the only real thing. And someone once told me that he makes out with his girlfriend with her disgusting birthmark. I do think that that was a little offensive that she's allowed happiness.

Yeah. Considering that she's one of the marked ones. Yes. I mean, we always just made a joke about making cancer patients villains, which is really people who have birthmarks. They're the ones who should be rounded up. But that's not a joke. I mean, they actually should. No, Olivia Cooke is incredibly charming

and very good in Thoroughbreds. Yeah, she's charming. Jesus Christ. That was chilling. Well, I'm going to go celebrate Passover with my family. So am I. Ben, are you? No. Are you going to celebrate Easter? Nope. Are you going to go celebrate Passover with my family. So am I. Ben, are you? No.

Are you going to celebrate Easter? Nope. Are you going to go home? Nope. Kids running around the studio. That's sweet. Yeah, that's Tiffany's daughter. She's really sweet.

Oh, cool. Yeah. Well, I think we're wrapping up the episode. Yeah, we are. Yes. But, gentlemen. Yeah. This episode will be dropping Sunday.

Okay. The 5th. Uh-huh. And that will also be the last day of the harsh madness bracket. Because, wait, let me get the timing straight. It's like... The 31st. Right.

Tonight will be the first of the final four. Tomorrow night's the second of the final four. And that will be the final. Yeah. When this drops.'s the second of the final four, and that will be the final when this drops. So, maybe we should drop a prediction. How do you guys want to handle this? Oh, it's April 1st, right? Exactly. I think Nancy Myers wins. I think it looks like Fincher

and Miller have been so... Very close. They were 50-50, then Miller pulled ahead, then I tweeted pro-Miller, and then Fincher started getting the lead. Right now, it's Fincher 53 to Miller 47, so I'm going to predict then Fincher started getting a lead right now. It's Fincher 53 to Miller 47. So I'm going to predict, I think Fincher takes that. and then I,

you think, so you think that Myers is beating a man? Yes. I guess I'll just predict that man will beat Myers. And then who do you think wins between man and Fincher? I think whoever comes out of man, Myers wins personal. Interesting. And then who do you think wins between Mann and Fincher? I think whoever comes out of Mann-Myers wins, personally. Interesting.

My prediction is whoever survives that side is your winner. I think Fincher beats Mann. I think Myers beats Fincher. Interesting. I don't think so. Well, who knows? Just because I think the Fincher love has been kind of automatic. And the ones that

they've been the biggest passion for pretty much this whole time have been Myers and Mann they've always struck me as the ones that's the ones where people go wild for them

the only other one that people were going wild for was fucking Gore Verbinski I know but David Fincher is like pizza like everyone's just like yeah good movies interesting to talk about

it's true very filmography real blank check guy so I think like oh accurate we don't see people who are passionately vouching for Fincher Good movies. Interesting to talk about. Very filmography. Real blank check guy. All accurate. We don't see people who are passionately vouching for Fincher, although there are some of them. There's some.

But more so most people just go like, Fincher. And they just vote and they move on. But he has never been up against someone, George Miller, I guess, being the exception, because that was the one that was close. Yeah. Who people were like,

yes, Nancy Meyers at all costs. 70s alt, man. Who else did he go up against? Del Toro? I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he had people at their champions. I don't know.

We're going to find out. It's interesting. I mean, he was our first seed, and then the other three people who were still in the game were between 13th and 19th seed. Yes, exactly. Like, the second, third, and fourth seeds, none of them made it far. No.

It's interesting. Yes, exactly. Like the second, third and fourth seeds, none of them made it far. No. It's interesting. It's interesting. So that will be the person we cover once Griffin is done filming. Yes. But we have recorded, we're in the middle

of the Brooks miniseries. We have two miniseries saved up after that. And then we have, yes, two more miniseries that will go. And then we're going to do

whoever wins the bracket. Yes. So that's the schedule. So, there you go. I think it was successful. I think we'll do it again. March Madness? Yeah. Yeah. Also, like, I mean, there's been a lot of, like, film internet entertainment March

Madness style brackets. And I like that ours has some stakes. It has stakes. There are consequences. It's not just, like, which is the best Pixar movie. It has seeding. It has seeding. Some of these fucking brackets have been going around. Yeah, you can tell that they have not seeded. And you know, people were saying to me when the bracket was posted, like, well, why is

blah against blah? Like, why don't they have a shot? And I'm like, that's how seeding works. Yeah. Otherwise, it would be annoying. You would have like two big shots against each other first round. But also, look, we thought it was cruel to put Elaine May against Wes Anderson, and then she creamed him.

Yeah, she did. Like that's the fun of seeding is sometimes you're wrong. As we said, like first seed still in the game, 2 through 12 out of here. True. He's sick, guys. All right. He put a little paprika on that one. Thank you all for listening.

Please remember to rate, review, subscribe. Thank you to Elaine Montgomery for our theme song, Joe Ball and Pat Reynolds for our artwork, and Triggered for our social media. Thank you to wetransferstamps.com, Blue Apron, for sponsoring today's episode. I'm so sorry we didn't do any bits. I'm sure it probably crushed you.

I'm sure all three companies have representatives listening who are so upset by the lack of intrusions. I think we did good ad reads. Are you looking at me? Yeah. Yeah, they're good. Nothing matters anymore. Nothing matters anymore. Chaos reigns. Okay, well, it's actually just like a sort of

three out of five. Okay, and as always, I'm going to go spit in a sink. Jesus Christ. What's wrong? I'm sick!