Blank Check with Griffin & David - Solo: A Star Wars Story

Episode Date: May 27, 2018

On the week of it’s release in May of 2018, Griffin and David discussed Solo: A Star Wars Story. This episode is sponsored by RXBAR (RXBAR.com/check PROMO: check) and WeTransfer.

i heard a podcast about you i was wondering if it was true I heard a podcast about you. I was wondering if it was true. Everything they've podcasted about me is true. Griffin held his hand up for the drink. Yes. Good job. Little robot drink pour.

Hello, everybody. Alden, he started. I heard him. I can't do him. I think that's not bad. I think it sounds better than you think. Very specific delivery from this guy. Yes. Yes.

Yes. And I would argue. Yes. Yeah. Yes. Yes. And I would argue coming straight out with the hot takes, they tampered his delivery a little bit in this movie. You think so? I think they

pulled him back in a way. They gave him a specific diction to sort of use or whatever. That I think is to the detriment of the film. But ladies and gentlemen, we're getting ahead

of ourselves because my name, of course, is Downtown Griffiniums. And my name, of course, is David Sims. David Dog Sims. Sure, David Dog Sims. But then you're, aren't you Griff? No, ourselves because my name of course is downtown griffiniums and my name of course is david sims david dog sims sure david dog sims but then you're aren't you griff no because they're griff heads

we're combining now look look i'm off the leash you're the dog you're off the leash let's be honest i'm well let me off the leash where my pound puppy's at because the dog's off the leash today i feel like that was so big in the 90s, like dog, like things, you know, like, you know, dog puns, you know,

and this sort of Snoop Dogg, Lil Bow Wow era. Not to mention Snoopy had a big 90s. Yeah, he had a huge 90s. Is that when he got the MetLife deal? Yes. The guy,

that guy, all over blimps. That guy cashed in on blimps. He cashed in. Like when I was a kid, I was like, MetLife make blimps. Like, that's what they, that's a blimp company, right? Like, they make blimps. Yeah, I also remember, like, watching the Super Bowl, and I hated sports so much that

I would look forward to being like, ah, a Snoopy cartoon in the middle of the Super Bowl, and I'd be like, no, he's just selling insurance? He's just selling it, yeah. Yeah. You know, you'd see, like, Woodstock and stuff. It'd be fun. But I'd be like, here's some classic Joe classic joe cool behavior what is a blimp like why like i love how like blimps it was in the 30s they were like all right we're gonna travel in these yeah and

then by the 90s it's like it'll float above a stadium with like a name on it like that's what a blimp is nickelodeon will give them to child stars. Like, how did the blimp just end there? Right. Like, why not just, I don't know, just don't do that. Just put the sign lower to the ground. Isn't it weird how much, though, like, the Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards used to really, like, they used to play the blimp. Like, it wasn't just the trophies.

Like, they used to have the blimp. I remember, like. Yeah, they were all in on blimps. Do you remember that Whitney Houston hosted those awards, like, five years in a row? I did not remember that. Before Rosie became, became like the Billy Crystal she was like the Johnny Carson and I distinctly remember an ad

that was like, hi I'm Whitney Houston from inside the Nickelodeon blimp and then she walked through it. The helium from the blimp caused her voice to raise. Oh, that's interesting. Anyway thank you all for listening. Please remember to rate, review, subscribe. Oh, we're done. Oh, good. good yeah this was blimp talk

that was good guys blimp talk record time yes yeah yeah yeah now let's start the next podcast that was blimp talk that was blimp check

okay a podcast about about blimps blimp culture sometimes they crash like the Hindenburg so is that why and sometimes they fly baby

is that why blimpy post is that why blimpy blimpy like the Hindenburg. And sometimes they fly, baby. Is that why Blimpie posts? Is that why Blimpie posts? Blimpie, like the sandwiches? Yeah. Because Blimps fell out of favor. Literally, as they fell out of the sky. Yeah.

Jesus Christ. Hi, everybody. Hi. Hi. Okay, this is a podcast called Blank Check. Yes. It is about filmographies. Directors who have massive success early on in their career give a series of blank checks

and make whatever crazy passion products they want. Sometimes they clear and sometimes they bounce. Baby. That's usually what this is. But this is a special episode. I think you folks

know what it is. You've already seen it in your feed. This is a special one-off episode where I tell summer camp stories for two hours. Because the response

was so positive. I want to give the fans what they want. Wow. Because the response was so positive. I want to give the fans what they want. Wow. Even the bit means everyone's just deleted. Everyone was just like, uh, no. I'm kidding.

Yeah. We used to be a Star Wars podcast. A no bits, pro smits, Star Wars podcast. That's true. So every time there's a new war, we got to go back. we got to talk about it yeah

and uh this is now the fourth new star war picture it is they made four of these things it's called solo yeah a star wars story and we saw it we did we saw it you We did. We saw it. You've seen it twice. I saw it two times. I've seen it once. Yeah. Producer Ben has seen it once. Okay. The Ben Dusser has seen it once.

Just once. The Poet Laureate has seen it once. And I thought it was okay. Producer Ben has seen it once. Who knows? Mr. Positive has seen it once. Mr. Positive has seen it once. Singular times.

The Fuckmaster has seen it once. Professor Crispy has not seen it because. Singular times. The Fuckmaster has seen it once. Professor Crispy has not seen it because he doesn't exist. No, but count it once. Peeper peeped it. Yeah.

Third bike Benny rode into the theater. Soaking wet Benny stayed pretty dry during the movie. Yeah, I only spilled my drink a little bit.

Mm-hmm. Also graduates a certain task over the course of different majors. Sure. Kylo Ben, producer Ben Kenobi,

Ben Night Shyamalan, Ben Sait, Save Anything, Ailey Benz with the dollar sign, War Haas, Ben 19, The Fennel Maker,

Ben Glish, fuck, Mr. Ben Credible, and Robo Haas. That sounds right. I don't know. I guess we're debuting the Brooks, because we like at this

point in the the episodes we recorded before we haven't really thought of the ben name for brooks right we recorded uh like four months of episodes in advance and this is the first time we've recorded in like two months now that sounds right yeah that's crazy which is crazy yeah griffin's been i don't know chilling out i don't know, chilling out. I don't know. Yeah, very relaxed, sleeping very much, very cool, very fun. Yeah, you don't look sick. No. Well, to be fair, Griffin looks sick a lot. I think I look more sick than usual.

I think you look fine. This is the first. Your shirt's just like a white t-shirt. That's a little, I guess that sort of gives you a drawn. Kind of wearing the uniform. We're on hiatus from filming the Tick tick which is why i was able to see solo last night come in here record this today and then i am going and getting on a plane and flying to london which david i should explain this to david because i know ben knows london is it is a it is a

city okay in another country yeah the capital of the united kingdom wait but how do you know well oh you must have went i mean i've traveled to london on vacation before maybe he's read it in a book oh sure both of those things are true but also i lived in london for a lot of my life uh from 1995 to 2008 wow can we start the podcast because i'm very confused can we start blimp bl blimp check. I forget what it was called. It's like, it's like, what's your origin story?

Yeah. It's like, I wish someone, you want my heart. Yeah. We got to bring the Kasdans in to fucking explain. Who are your people? Yeah.

That's, that's what they asked me coming into a British, uh, control passport control. And I was playing the Sims on my phone. I don't know. Uh, that moment can go fuck itself i can't

imagine that there's a person on earth who was satisfied by that moment because that moment is written for someone in the audience to go uh-huh the best reaction i think i've heard someone have to that moment is like whatever you know sort of like okay the second thing the second they said who are your people i turned to you and started shaking my hand you did the solo i uh solo his look i i have a feeling that that was something cast and had thought of a zillion years ago and was always like oh man if i ever did like a han solo movie i'll finally get to put that in and that's like a funny thing to like say in an interview where you're like when you're like promoting dream catcher and you're like you know what i always

thought it was like because he didn't have any family so it's like it's yeah it's like a pseudonym almost like a nom de plume incredibly dumb when it's in a movie. And also, an hour and a half later, he starts talking about his dad. He does talk about his dad. He does talk about his dad. He's abandoned his family name. I read an interview with Mike Ryan and the Castons today. That Mike Ryan did with the Castons. In which they make that clear.

Not clear in the movie. But that drives me crazy because then it feels like... Oh, so what? Their plan in Solo Duo is to have... Do you like that joke? Solo Duo? in the movie but that drives me crazy because then it feels like oh so what their plan and solo duo is to have you get like that joke solo duo is that would be the name of the second solo movie sure but is the plan to then have the explanation of the family that he was lying about and then reveal what his real last name is i don't give a shit well it's that classic prequel problem where they're like haven't you always wondered how blah

blah blah and i'm like no not really not like honestly really wasn't really thinking about it now let me ask you this there's a first big question i want to throw out here sure okay would this movie work better as an original screenplay set in the star wars universe not being these specific characters i mean i think 80 yes 20 no yeah like you'd need to change it but like you would need to change it like a lot i think the 20 no is the stuff that is less valuable in the movie and i think the characters as written if you just hired actors and said hey do, do whatever you want, would work totally independently. And I think it actually is somewhat to the movie's detriment that you're constantly comparing them to the other actors who have played them, your other understanding of the characters and their history.

No, I think that's, I mean, that was my take coming out of the press screening was like, right, it's a pretty fun little Star Wars caper. It's a pretty bad Han Solo movie. It's a terrible Han Solo movie, and it's a pretty fun little Star Wars caper it's a pretty bad Han Solo movie it's a terrible Han Solo movie and it's it's a pretty mediocre prequel it's a pretty solid Star Wars caper

yeah I think so it's solid functional enough but it is you know it is a Gentleman's Six like I do think

that's just where it is see I started watching it in the first 30 minutes oh boy me too we're on the same page people right because a lot of people think oh it takes a while to get going first 30 minutes exactly what i wanted out of

this movie right and then from then on out the balloon just kept on losing some air so i started out and i was like this is like a gentleman seven or eight like this isn't great but i'm sure you're in really me too i felt the same way yeah we'll talk about it right by like about the halfway point i was like it's a six i was inflating it's a gentleman six and by the end of it i was like is this a gentleman's five i think it's a six. I was inflating, it's a gentleman's six. By the end of it, I was like, is this a gentleman's five? I think it's a six. I saw it at a press screening. For the other ones, even Rogue One,

the press screening was the Monday before the Thursday release. Just three days early. There was one press screening. There was no junket. No one had seen it, essentially. The premiere was only a couple days before that. was either like lined up or right before yeah and everyone's there you know it's that and it's like it really was like anyone who's anyone exactly and it's like and i weren't invited it's a press screening that's really buzzing with excitement like even

rogue one which obviously is more of like a double than a home run but like you know it's like people are still like wow. But there are a couple times that you've brought me to these screenings that are like this is the first time this movie's being seen. Sure yeah. Like Hateful Eight we did that in the post and there is some excitement to just like I have

no other opinions to cloud my judgment of this movie. No one's like tweeted things that might spoil it by me wondering what I'm gonna see. Like I just sit down and i'm just gonna fucking digest it and whereas with the solo press screening the premiere had happened a few days earlier in la but yeah it's just so it was in the morning the theater wasn't even full we were kind of just like oh here we are here we go to see a movie like what theater uh lincoln square oh cool uh you know but like it's they're just you know it was it did not have that feeling of like oh fuck like we're so pumped up like we're about to unwrap a new star wars movie yeah it's

like oh this is we'll see what this is right like people were kind of like i don't know maybe it's good i mean obviously the bad precedent well can i so so to that point i was just looking here at the imdb trivia for the movie okay sure And here's something I had no idea about. Top trivia story, solo a Star Wars story, okay? Sure. Top trivia item. Phil Lord and Christopher Miller left the film in June 2017? True.

Only three weeks away from filming? Three weeks away from wrapping filming. Finishing principal photography. Yeah. What? That's crazy. I've never heard of this. You've never heard of this? I've never heard of this you've never heard of this i've never heard of

this like your bit yeah so go with it no wait i this is news to me well it might actually be news to you yeah is it okay yeah what happened phil lord they've had this now right when you know whenever what is when does lucasfilm buy get bought by disney i forget 2013 something like that right yeah basically the and i feel like the initial slate they were like we're gonna have a trilogy we're gonna have this rogue one movie yeah and we're gonna definitely have a boba fett prequel and a han solo prequel like those are the original basket of ideas yes right And they kept on being like, Rogue One, 100% happening. New Skywalker trilogy, 100% happening.

And then unannounced, they were like, we're working on a couple mystery scripts that everyone thought were a Solo film, a Boba Fett film, and a Yoda movie. Oh, really? I didn't know about the Yoda movie. Please don't do that. I think that one has sort of fallen by the wayside didn't know about the yoda movie please don't do that i think that one has sort of fallen by the wayside and been replaced by the kenobi movie put it in the wayside

forever put it in the yaddle movie okay okay i'm interested i'm interested i'm interested what if the yaddle movie was like ryan reynolds buried it's just her in the hole in the hole it's like the revenant it's just like her eating the force and like shaking or it's like secret honor it's like yaddle having a mental breakdown i brought up yaddle i think at the solo press screening and someone was like the fuck is yaddle and i was like right no one knows what i'm talking about yaddle under the influence yeah yaddle because right because people were a spoiler alert by the way we're going to talk about the whole fucking movie yeah we're so we're spoiler alert spoilers so darth maul's in this movie So Darth Maul's in this movie.

Darth Maul's in this movie. It's a sequel to Unbreakable. And someone was asking me Darth Maul questions because they knew I was a Star Wars nerd. And for some reason, I brought up Yaddle. And they were like, what the fuck is Yaddle? And I felt bad. What are you Yaddle-ing on about?

What are you Yaddle-ing about? Darth Maul being in the movie uh the secret the hot hand i've been holding under the table for last six months i've been this for a long time i will not say anything further you can ascertain figure it out yep um so this movie yeah so this movie got ordered pretty much right away yeah lucas film all right 2012 is when the sale happens I know that when he had already started George Lucas was already developing this movie

before he sold Lucasfilm Kazan apparently had always wanted to do this my assumption is Kazan was kind of like I'd love to do a hot solo movie

and this was before he got brought on to to rewrite Force Awakens with J.J. Abrams he was already working on this

I think this got delayed a little bit by him going over to that. But this was part of their initial slate of things being developed. Exactly. And so when in February 2013, Bob Iger says, yes, we have a Kasdan-written solo movie. We have a Simon Kinberg-written. Excuse me, we have a Kasdans.

They actually just said Kasdan at the time. Oh, at that point but you know yes his son jonathan kazdan right gets involved and kimber gets involved when kazan is switched over to force awakens sure jonathan is brought into sort of supplement yeah so kimberg was writing boba fett movie josh trank was gonna direct it he got fired later yeah uh he didn't even get really you know he it just didn't happen. Can I say something? And Ben, cut this out in advance. Please cut this out.

Like you did all the summer camp talk. Yeah. I heard a rumor this week that they are making a Boba Fett movie, but that it's going to be a Western. Seems too top secret. I'm sorry. You got to cut that.

Cut that out. Yeah, yeah. That's the kind of like fucking boiling material that like you know well this podcast could get sued yeah for that kind of michael avanetti gave me that information um 2015 july they announce han solo movie it's going to be released May 25th, 2018. Going to be directed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller. So this is the big thing. All the times that people have been whispering about the Solo movie,

everyone was like, no one wants to see that. Why are they doing it? It's true. No one is excited at any point about this idea. Until Lord and Miller get brought on. And then people are like, oh, so maybe it'll be like, they've done all these winky movies. It'll be clever and it'll be sort of like well that's a different energy than any star wars thing we've seen before and also here are the guys who have made a career off of taking bad ideas yes

and making them work like especially the i mean the two you think of are 21 jump street and the lego movie both times people were like that's not a you can't make that a movie but also like cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs which was one of my favorite picture books growing up sure not a lot of plot

doesn't have a narrative not a lot of plot it's just like it's essentially like a travelogue of like the different food that

reigns in this city there are no characters really can you confirm something for me though yes is there a leak in the boat still gets me every time isn't that two it's two

i just love it two is also good yeah because there's a leak in the boat yeah and uh uh fucking wolf forte is great in two sure the joke is there's an actual leak like the the vegetable oh got him cloudy with a chance it's fucking screaming right now have you you seen the Cloud with a Chance of Meatballs movies? I think you'd like them a lot. Yeah, you'd like them because it's like, I mean, they're kind of big. Meatballs are big. Big meatballs.

That's cool. There's a scientist character who makes a device that turns water into food, but then it gets stuck in the cloud, so it starts raining food, but the food's huge. That's awesome. Big food. And so people are into it, and it becomes like a tourist destination, but then the gets stuck in the clouds so it starts raining food but the food's huge. That's awesome. Big food. And so people are into it and it becomes like a tourist destination but then the food is too much.

Right. They're getting weighed down and then the sequel is they take all the excess food and they like ship it off to some like trash island to get rid of it, clean up the town but the food just started mutating and it's like food monsters. So there's like a taco dial. Yeah. A taco. So there's like a taco dial.

Yeah. A taco dial? It's like a taco crocodile. So, Phil Lord and Chris Miller. And then they realize he has sour cream, and they go, oh my God, it's a taco dial supreme. I know you love Phil Lord and Chris Miller. Five comedy points, I do.

You're basically like huge fans. I'm totally in a tank for them. Been so since Clone High. I would, yeah. Okay, so here's what I have to say. Yeah. I don't love Clone High. I know that's like a really crazy thing to say on the internet

because people really do love Clone High. I don't hate it. It was just never my show. I really enjoyed Cloudy. Yeah. Really enjoyed 21 Jump Street. And those are both movies that I like did not rush to see. And then when I saw them, I was like, wow, that was funny.

I know you don't like 22. But I was going to say, and I love the Lego movie. I really think that's a special movie. That's a very special movie. That's very cool. Yeah. I don't like 22. I think 22 is close to bad.

And it sort of indulges all the things about them that I don't really like. Sure. Yeah. I rewatched it recently, and it was a little better than I don't really like. Sure. Yeah. I rewatched it recently and it was a little better than I remembered it being actually. The Ice Cube stuff in that, even though Ice Cube's a pro, is like a slightly embarrassing,

in my opinion. See, I disagree. I think that's the strongest part of the film. We'll fight about this later. He's funny. No, I just think that shit's sexist. I just don't like that stuff. Just get that plot out of here.

It's 2014. You don't like disapproving dad? I don't like dad saying, don't fuck my daughter, who's a grown up. I don't want that plot anymore. Yeah keep it out of the yeah i i mean i agree with that i agree with that i like ice cube is a scary guy yes he's funny like what he's no but i i do agree that's a plot line we never need to see ever again i hate it it's one

thing if it's like it's never it's never great honestly but you like but she's also a grown woman you were a big fan of blockers blockers is funny because the parents are fools in that right like you know the the kids are why i like blockers like the parents stuff in blockers is funny but i like the kids and and the funniest stuff is like baron holtz who's the one who's like yeah i want my daughter to fuck well i also like that that he's there the whole time but he's never really on their like uh crusade he more just wants to hang out that guy has gotten so fucking good he's really good in that movie and he's someone i was always kind of like yeah he's fine he's kind of like high energy like i was never like a big ike baron

holds fan no but i thought he was just big becomes so funny and like legitimately a very good actor yeah he's a pretty good yeah i mean. I mean, credit to Ike. Yeah. I like Ike. I think... Walked into that one. Did you see Blockers? I haven't. Do you like Ike?

Ike? He's funny in like the Neighbors movies. Show me. Yeah, I like him a lot in those. He's really good in Snatch, which I continue to stand for as an underrated movie. I still haven't seen it. Yeah. I do like this guy. Yeah, he's a good Ben Scumbum I continue to stand for as an underrated movie I do like this guy

he's a good Ben Scumbum kind of guy but his role usually was more like I'm in your movie for 10 minutes and I'm just bringing a lot of energy I feel like he always has a goatee and you're like oh this guy is a scumbag he's always got scuzzy looking facial hair

he also was the guard in Suicide Squad who they clearly set up to get his comeuppance and then just disappears from the movie. I'm sure they filmed a comeuppance that they just I'm sure they filmed six comeuppances. There's eight plots in that movie that just they forgot to do. Like doesn't Scott Eastwood die in that movie and like

it's heroic? Hey, I forgot Scott Eastwood was in that movie. He's in that movie! I think he dies. And it's like, oh shit, we lost Chad. You're just like, who's Chad? And then you're like, that was supposed to be like Cheetah's father? I'm sure it's some shit where his character was secretly supposed to be a teaser for some other character. Turns out he's, I don't know.

He's Mr. Mixaplex's cousin? Fucking DC Universe I can't wait to watch All the movies They've announced though I'm so excited And you know what It's stressful How many bonus episodes

We're gonna have to do Cause we're gonna have to do Shazam We're gonna have to do Black Adam We're gonna have to do Birds of Prey We're gonna have to do

Harley and Joker We're gonna have to do Suicide Squad 2 Man of Steel 2 Sure We're gonna have to do The Batman The Batman Green Lantern Corps Yes 100% We're going to have to do Suicide Squad 2. Man of Steel 2. We're going to have to do... The Batman.

Green Lantern Corps. Isn't there something like Chloe Zhao is going to direct a fucking... No, that was Captain Marvel. That was Captain Marvel. She met for Captain Marvel. You're thinking of the Birds of Prey movie. I actually was joking.

She met for Black Widow. Oh, you're right. We still got Cyborg coming up. Oh, we got Cyborg coming up. We got Cyborg 2. They're bringing Bergman back from the dead for that one. Who they got? We got Flashpoint.

I think Wonder Woman 2 is stuck in development hell. It might be. Yeah, right there. Let's not devote a lot of energy to that one. No, my favorite thing is they're always like, let's one up. All right, we got Spielberg. Spielberg's going to make a movie. Black Hawk.

Yeah, like him. Yeah, he's going to make a movie. Who else we got? We got fucking Scorsese. Okay, he'll make a movie. Black Hawk. Yeah, he's going to make a movie. Who else we got? We got fucking Scorsese. Okay, he'll make a movie. Ava DuVernay's New Gods. Ava DuVernay's going to do New Gods. James Cameron, he's doing a movie.

Who else we got? Michael Cimino, he's alive. He's back. He's doing a movie. We got Teen Titans go to the movies. We got Teen Titans go to the polls. We got Teen Titans Pokemon go to the polls. Can you imagine in this boardroom that they're all vaping?

Yeah, it's 20 affleck clones vaping yeah so we gotta do a bird's prey like thomas pinchin is gonna direct the movie like i'm just trying to think like the most ludicrous person they can announce next like who is it ida lupino she's back from the dead we support female filmmakers Ida Lupino is going to make a Black Canary movie DC has always prided themselves who's the one who's like a magician lady

oh Zantana Ida Lupino is going to make a Zantana Elaine May is making a Zantana movie DC was so like was like just fucking waving their arms about the fact where like, we're doing Wonder Woman before Marvel's done a female superhero.

We're doing Cyborg before Black Panther. Sure, sure, sure. What if their big thing was like, we're going to be the first studio to hire a dead director. At CinemaCon, they have like a Frankenstein machine and they like put electrodes onto a corpse what's going on frank borzat just signed on for solomony? King Vidor himself.

I'm running out of DC villains or heroes, whatever. Hawkman. King Vidor's doing Hawkman. Can I pat myself on the back and call my own shot? Sure. I was at a Comic-Con. It was something when we were promoting the Tick pilot. I can't remember which one it was, but I was there

at the bar with Chris McCullough, aka Jackson Public, creator of Venture Brothers. He's a great guy who I just realized we should have on the show at some point. Let's have him on. I love how you're occasionally just like, oh shit, I actually know.

Michelle Obama. And she texts me and says that she listens to the show that's weird she loves it she likes when the dog is off the leash yeah she's like just listen to Lincoln dog's off the leash oh boy

sometimes people call me David Dogs people who like me are called David Dogs for people to understand that but now also you've become the dog when you're silly. When you get silly you become the dog and the dog's off the leash. Yeah.

Jackson Public and I were at this like fucking hotel bar where the convention was watching What? Watching attendees who were still in their cosplay outfits sure like ordered drunkenly trying to make passes at each other it was like that like last night of summer camp like dance like who's so who is the best one there was a guy dressed up as solomon grundy who

was just swinging and missing so hard and we just were like for 45 minutes, like at a fair distance, right? Far away from him, just making Solomon Grundy jokes about this guy trying to wedge himself into circles and like get attention. And then he'd like slowly walk away. And I just at one point went, Solomon Grundy, born on a Monday,

not his night. Pretty good. It's pretty good. After he like swung and missed with like princess it was exactly that and he like wasn't being aggressive it was like he was clearly like the one person who didn't have like a pack of friends with him well also dressing up as solomon it's a bad look not like a good move if you're looking to look hot. I'm like basically a Frankenstein man.

You're like an unintelligent Frankenstein man who lives in the sewers. Yeah, exactly. You got raggedy clothes and muck on your face. Not his night. Look at this. He's got four knives in him in this one. I'm sure I'm Benson. Yeah, Solomon Grundy.

You would love Solomon Grundy. We should get Ben attached to direct a Solomon Grundy movie. It's happening. DC would take that. Oh, no. Unfortunately, it turns out that Moses of the Bible is directing that one. We here at DC! We brought it back!

He brought you the Ten Commandments! No, the actual ones, not the movie! For the listener at home, I like that joke so much I swatted my mic away from my face and almost swung it a full 360 degrees. Almost hit me in the face. Alright, so Phil Lord and Chris Miller.

They get hired to make the movie. And everyone went, interesting, this is going to have an offbeat energy, off the hump. And they do have that rep where it's like, yeah, like you were saying, well, every time they get hired you're kind of like, that sounds like a bad idea, and then they do a good job. So I guess this, what sounded like a bad bad idea and then they do a good job so i guess this what sounded like a bad idea they'll probably do

a good job and look at the very least it's not going to be boring they're not going to do the obvious stayed kind of like didactic prequel they're going to do something weird with this and then they start casting there's a big fucking thing for months and months and months every single male actor under the age of 32 other than griffin newman auditions for han solo i didn't take it personally it's fine i was literally the only person who didn't audition it's one of those things where no one was excited for a han solo movie and everyone was like no one can really do what harrison ford did and yet everyone was like but who's gonna play han solo it was like rami malek it was like, does anyone want to see him play Han Solo?

I remember, obviously, Miles Teller was in the running. I'm trying to think of who else was a short list. What's his name? Baby Driver. Ansel Elgort. Right.

There was another, not Jai Courtney, but another kind of potato head guy like that. Oh, I think Jack Rayner. Yeah, sure. Was in the sort of final running.

I think he's talented. I like him in, I like him more when he plays scumbags. I like him in Free Fire or whatever. But Han Solo is very tricky because I think people... Here's some other ones. I got some other names for you. Dave Franco. Sure.

Not as small people. Harrison Ford's tall. He's like six foot two. Yeah, it's weird. Aaron Taylor Johnson. It really is like a list of like Nick Robinson, who's the guy who was just in Love, Simon. Right.

Rami Malek. Like you said, Ed Westwick. That sounds good. No, no, no. Let's not talk about him. What's a James Toback? Clark Gable? Really?

Do you know what's crazy? I looked at the list of hosts from like two seasons ago on SNL. Sure. And there were literally five hosts from that season who would never be allowed back on the show right now. Like who?

Like Louis C.K. Sure. Casey Affleck. He shouldn't have been hosting that. I know, but there were like four or five from one season. You know, that Casey Affleck-Duncan sketch is funny though from that episode.

Tom Felton, former Draco Malfoy. That's weird. Logan Lerman. Chris Pratt. That's not true. Scott Eastwood's on this list. I mean, this was a wide net.

Was Efron involved ever? I don't know. I don't think he was, which is weird, because he was sort of like someone who tested for every role. But this is also the problem, is that it was like, oh, God. Han Solo. Everyone loves him. So charismatic. So charming. So confident. tested for every role but yeah this is also the problem is that it was like oh god han solo everyone loves him so charismatic so charming so confident but there are a couple tricky things about han solo that i think often get lost in people's minds you know that they don't really break down which is one han solo always has a chip on his shoulder yes right true there's a little bit of an anger to

the character yes he's an asshole but not in the way where he's mean to people. It's more like he just has a sort of simmering energy. Because here's the thing that I analyzed in the first 30 minutes of this movie where I started getting really excited that I felt like they were getting the character right. Han Solo always acts high status, but he's always low status.

Han Solo is always kind of in a put-upon situation in one way or another. He's either backed in a corner, he's surrounded by people he doesn't like he owes someone money whatever it is but he always acts like he's above but that's why he's a little annoying or not but little he's sort of floating in Return of the Jedi because like at that point they're just sort of like General Solo welcome back and he's like hi he's a little like you want to do something he's like sure he's kind of like boring middle-aged like i've settled down i was a little wild in my younger years it really is kind of truly but you're you're totally right right um the other thing though and we'll talk about it is i do feel like

this movie made the move of like well why don't we show how han used to be a little nicer and then like the world kind of ground him down a bit and by the end of it he'll be more like han solo-y you know like he'll get betrayed by one person he's gonna you know that girl's gonna screw him over that's kind of the casino royale approach right like casino royale is the most successful version of that but it works because it's not so strictly a prequel it's just like this is a younger james bond yeah it's not trying to fit into a specific timeline you're right though casino royale is kind of doing that but it's not like in Casino Royale James Bond at the beginning is like I love being a secret agent. Nothing

bad about that. But I think that's why the Vesper Lynn plotline works so well in that movie and why she's so good and also. But also Casino Royale is the first James Bond book basically and so like it is. Right. They're not trying to reverse engineer it around Doctor No.

Which is a big difference. They're not having to play off of expectations of literally he has to get to this point. It's James Bond. We're cool. He's been done so many times. This is like, right. It's Han Solo. He's been played by one person. That's it.

Yeah. And it is that thing like the name where they're like, don't you ever wonder like who really put that chip on his shoulder? No, I don't care. There's no moment in any of the original movies where Han Solo's like, back on Corelli, I had it rough. I grew up on the streets. He never says shit like that.

Now, this is the other problem, okay? Connor Ratliff, friend of the show, always says, I for years thought I was a fan of Star Wars, and then I realized I don't really like Star Wars movies. I like Han Solo movies. It's a good take, sure. Right? And I think the thing that makes Star Wars work

is that you have Han Solo who doesn't want to be in a Star Wars movie and is a little bit outside of it. And putting that character at the center kind of fucks the movie. That's fair. And I think this is what everyone was predicting. Yep.

And I, watching this, feel like not as disast disastrously it suffers a little bit from the same thing that happens in the lost world jurassic park where in order to take ian malcolm the fun character who cuts the shit the off ball guy you put him on the ball you kind of sand off the edges a little bit a little bit i agree with all that uh does connor like this movie do we know don't know sure don't know i will ask him sure i'm curious to see but i i would guess that he would feel like oh this is literally a film about that character but they're taking away the energy that makes him interesting yeah you know and i do feel like this is a movie that's missing some some verve to it it's missing a certain crackle which even if if the Lord Miller version was bad,

who fucking knows? We'll never know, right? They shot 90% of the movie. The effects were unfinished, so we'll never see their cut. It's like a fucking Snyder thing. It's the exact same thing. There will never be a released cut of their version.

But they shot enough of it that there is pretty much a narrative with green screens that you could watch, right? I think that's accurate. I mean, from what I've heard, I've read a lot of reporting and then heard some rumors. Yeah, you know, basically. They were three weeks away from finishing. Right, but I think

the implication was they weren't and there was going to be a lot of reshoots coming. Like, you know, that was one of the reasons Disney was very alarmed. And apparently they would, I mean, the thing that everyone said, because every actor in this movie pretty much has said things got a lot better when Ron Howard took over

yeah that was in terms of work experience right it was a much easier shoot he's a pro also they had laid out a lot of track work

all the design work had been done I mean he inherited that's true other than recasting Paul Bettany yeah every character

had been established the designs were there the droids were there the sets were built they had their key creatives. Bradford Young, who's the MVP of this movie. The most interesting aspect of this movie is just the way it looks. Because it's the most...

It looks interesting. It's the most interesting looking Star Wars movie. It's the movie that's played the most with the actual cinematography. I think Last Jedi is gorgeously shot, actually. I agree with you. But I think this is actually my favorite looking Star Wars movie. I think it looks good. But what I would say is that my favorite looking Star Wars movie I think it looks good but what I would say

yes is that Lord and Miller hired Bradford Young you know they wanted and Bradford Young to be clear

he's this sort of somewhat up and coming still he's pretty young he's the best of his generation he's like mid 30s he's a very exciting cinematographer who he shot Selma

and then he shot The Most Violent Year and then he shot Arrival he has a very like foggy look he loves he's like the Gordon Willis. And then he shot a rival. He has a very like foggy look. He loves, he's like the, the Gordon Willis of our time.

He likes things dark. He likes colors. He likes having scenes, giving them one specific color palette. And I love that in the movie you have scenes that are just like blue. Like the only lighting is blue, you know? So,

but they hire Bradford Young. Yeah. I think that's interesting. Yes. But I cannot imagine how their movie works with the bradford young thing because like bradford young is making yeah this like he's making like vanishing point like he's making this really like gritty grimy crime movie yeah and like lord and miller like the stuff that feels like them in this movie which is very few

and far between but like that moment where it's like you just clicked that rock you know that's not that's you just made a clicking noise like those fun little bits yeah they don't match with that vibe no but i also think and they've never made a visually interesting movie apart from like the animated ones obviously are nice but like like it's not like 21 jump street looks bad those two films are like solidly shot yeah they're fine i think lego movie looks incredible and i give them a lot of credit because that wasn't the obvious approach to shoot it like it was oh stop motion small scale photography like a movie's amazing right um but uh i mean yeah i i will never see it like you said but i when i was watching it i was like i don't see how this

works with like goofy or by all accounts what they did on the two jump street movies and what they were doing on this is we want the time to really experiment with these scenes and find unexpected things right which is what you kind of feel like this movie needs is just weird offbeat energy and angles to things but from all the reporting we've read one they ran into the problem of lawrence kazan wrote this movie right and he was is his character they're not shooting what i wrote yeah they're not shooting what i wrote they're not shooting it the way i want them to no i think they were also junking i think it was both yeah yeah and kazan and also like not only are they not shooting what i wrote but it's sort of the vibe from what kazan's interviews have been like they're not doing

a han solo movie they're just doing their movie like and this is a han solo movie like they're not getting the character right and then it gets into this whole thing with everyone he's a real like guardian of han solo everyone having all this anxiety about alden aaron rick who i think is the fucking best he's great i think he's good in the movie i think he's solid in the movie but i do feel i watch this and i i there were moments in this film where i'm in the middle of filming right now i'm very stressed out all the time. Can you put a violin underneath this? I don't know. Who cares?

I'm not asking for sympathy. I'm just saying there were moments I was watching this movie and not just with him but with all the actors I just almost started feeling a panic attack trying to imagine their production experience. And especially with him because there was so much skepticism around anyone playing han solo yeah then when he got cast people were like he doesn't look like

harrison ford sure he's quite small right yeah yeah uh you know this and that but there was still that excitement because of hail caesar where people like he's seen hail caesar we're like that's an interesting choice you're not hiring someone to do an impression right and then when the lord miller stuff came out and ron howard took over there were all these stories that it was like lucasfilm hired an acting coach and they have someone working with him which i think people misrepresented as he doesn't know how to act they're hiring someone to teach him how to act which is i think they brought someone on because everyone was stressed out about him being too far off from har Ford. Maybe, but from what I read, they,

he needed to be calmed down and he really loved having this person like help him through whatever. Like maybe he was feeling the scale of it. I don't know. Which apparently it was like, basically like everyone was like, Oh no, they had an acting coach, but all the reporting read was like the acting coach was actually really

helpful for him. He liked it. I'll say this too. Like the only acting teacher I ever really liked working with, the one who Ellen Burson recommended to you, right. Who actually died about a year ago. Oh,

I'm sorry. Elizabeth Kemp. She was an incredible person, but she, her main sort of like, sort of gig was she would be the onset acting coach for like five people who have been nominated for or won Academy Awards, right?

Like Bradley Cooper and Hugh Jackman and Jennifer Connelly and people like that, where whatever movie they were doing, they would pay her to fly down and be on set with them every day and work on the scenes with them. Wow. And that doesn't get reported on. Sure. And people don't go like, oh my God, Bradley Cooper doesn't know how to act. He needed her on set every day for American Sniper.

Right. And it's like, that's his process. Yeah. But everyone's knives were out for Enric so much. And I think if you're a young dude there's a lot of expectation there's a lot of pressure and then the directors get fired and the studio executives are going is he too silly is he too broad is the character this is the character that you want someone to just be working with you and going like you're good you're good

you're good you're good and also like here's your baseline let's get you here yeah you know like if you're worried that you're too big or too small right like well this is what we should be aiming for. Right. There are moments in this movie where I feel I get some excitement from his performance.

Me too. I don't think he's ever bad in the movie. I think at his worst moments he is totally solid and he's carrying the film. I think at his best

moments he's really got his own thing going which is kind of fun and engaging. That's kind of my take is I actually like the movie his performance. actually like the move, his performance.

I like the movie. I like his performance, but to me, like it's just, he's got his own thing going. And I think it's, I think it's basically unified and good. I just don't, I don't know that it's Han Solo.

Like it's just nothing like the Harrison Ford performance. That's fine. I feel like he doesn't have, maybe he has some, but he doesn't have as much charisma as some of the other supporting characters. Agreed, but I also think that's the problem with making Han Solo the lead. Right. He's not there to make fun of things.

He's not able to do his function. Right. Yeah. In the beginning, he is a little bit when it's more about him. Which I love this section. Just him as like a fucking small scale con artist. He's like the artful Dodger or something, you know? And, you know,

the other problem is, yes, Donald Glover shows up in the movie. He's, one, doing an excellent interpretation. It's a really smart sort of vocation.

He's doing Lando. Yes. He's got the voice, but it doesn't sound like he's doing the voice too hard. You know what I mean? Like, he just, the way he's carrying himself

is bright, you know? And it's also just like, Donald Glover is a very charismatic actor. And he's a guy who is just so fully in the pocket right now. He's in some insane zone of just like artistic power. He's having one of the greatest months

any American artist has ever had. I know this movie was shot a while ago, what have you. But it's kind of an unfair advantage that Lando gets to function like Han Solo in this movie you're right yes that's the thing although then it takes sort of a weird seriousness

he's juggling all those things and trying to figure out whether or not he cares whether or not he likes you that sort of stuff now there's a thing that this movie sets up A in this first 30 minute chunk we have the best character in the film who's proxima this is a huge summer for proximas in blockbusters yeah because it's proxima midnight and infinity

war played by carrie coon yep great performance and then just her name is just proxima and this played lady proxima lady proxima played by academy award winner linda hunt that's right you're talking about that wet worm that giant worm lady who's allergic to the sun? Fucking best character ever? I was watching this and rocking out. And she's like, oh, Han Solo! Unbelievable. You must bring me my hyperfuel!

And he's trying to out-trick her. She's like, no, no! And she likes it dark. Yeah. Which I'm a fan of. Loves it dark. I love it dark. I love the look of that it dark i love the look

of that set i love the look of her assistant who has the like retractable me too i also just like i mean honestly i'm i get that the movie kind of needs to get off corellia fast in some ways but like i would kind of enjoy like a little oliver twist thing with her as faggot like just like 10 more minutes of that 100 and then this whole chunk of the movie i'm like when they go to this space that's sort of like the immigration yes like i'm like this is where star wars works best i know is when it's sort of really strong analogs to current day struggles i just want to pull you back for one second though please because the movie does not have a crawl yeah but it does do something new yeah it does blue text a long time ago in a galaxy far far away and then just has a couple and then it has more blue text right for some they've tried this

they keep trying to figure out crack the non-crawl code i don't think any of that's necessary right i mean the information they give you is pretty much established within the next 90 seconds of the film that is true i think it's more of a mood thing than a information thing but i kind of like the text i don't know that it works. I'll tell you what I was thinking. I like, it is a lawless time. I like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I was also thinking, like, if they're trying to establish a different tone and mood for these

like, spin-off movies, like, something as simple as just, like, having opening credits would throw a very different vibe. That would be If you're not going to do the crawl, if you're not going to do the flying thing. Like, when he was going through the opening car chase, I was like,

I kind of want to see, like, production designed by... That would be radical. Right? You know, but no one does that. I know. Because, like, the Marvel Universe movies,

they always do the credits at the end. Like, I feel like there's not a lot of movies that do the over... You know, big blockbuster movies that do that. No, now, the films that have to position themselves as major events.

Right. I love opening credits, though. Me too. I mean, you know how obsessed I am with credits. Right. Yes. Love it. I like the opening title.

I like the little weird holographic projection thing. But, yeah. But this whole opening section. He's a little street boy. I love. He's got a girlfriend. And I was just like, you know what? This is good Star Wars writing because anyone who thinks they don't like Star Wars would be able to totally connect to this.

Here are two poor kids. Sure. They live in the slums. They're trying to get out, find a better life. Yes. They go to this weird office. It's like, okay, this is an immigration struggle. This is them trying to get out of poverty.

This is them trying to find a better sort of class of citizenship. You know? They get separated. I was like, all of this stuff is like very relatable. You were very into, I'm also into the scene. I like Proxima. Yeah.

She's cool. I just think that she got the right ideas and that we should like think about her as like a candidate in 2018. 100%. Something like that. You know, Proxima is just,

I think she's just a good person. Yeah. So, yes, but what you're saying about the, the Ellis Island, whatever it is, you know, the sort of like big transit hall. a good person yeah so uh yes but what you're saying about the the uh ellis island whatever it is you know the sort of like big transit hall i love that where it's like he's so fucked yeah like so many people in the star wars universe what does he do he has to sign up like that's

like you know you're always wondering like who wants to be a stormtrooper shittiest job in the world like i'm watching at this point shot like that's that job is this movie great like is this movie like super fucking high functional entertainment walking out of the press screening everyone was like those first half that first half what are they talking about like it's underlit it's so dark nothing's happening I agree I'm just saying like and then and then they're like and then you know when the story kicks in then it's good I don't agree I really like the first half and I think there's more tension to him yes I think there's more tension in them trying to kicks in, then it's good. I don't agree. I really like the first half hour. I'm more into him. I think there's more tension in them trying to get away from Proxima's

people and the authorities than there is in the rest of the movie. That sort of opening chase stuff, them trying to get through the speeder chase. I love him being overly confident, thinking he's going to pull off this cinematic move and then getting caught. So into all this, loving all the design, loving all the creatures. 100% it. Then the flash forward three years sure they get separated i just well well

there's also the solo moment which fuck that we're not talking about it ever again i'm not what's your favorite kind of cup john robin blake yeah i mean that's what that's what it is right but at least and john that that is just more nolan going like wink yeah robin whereas this is like han hershowitz uh no i go by my middle name solo i go by my middle name it's here on the id card read it out for me please solo is a nice name uh but i love that cut where they're like you know the empire you're gonna have a great time cut to to, right, mud. Him in the mud.

Just like, go charge. You have to win for your empire that way. This is like classic, like fucking Star Wars. Like, you know, Luke's looking out at the two sunsets. He wants to get out of the suburbs. You know, this is, you know, the Ewoks are like the Viet Cong. You know, not the Viet Cong, but you know, it's the Vietnam War. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, they are. Yeah. Yeah. I just, I was like so into all this. And then when we're introduced to Beckett, Val, and Rio. Uh-huh. Three hustlers who kind of are aspirational figures of a higher functioning version of what Han is trying to be, scrape by in life. But they seem to have it together.

And I was like, this is kind of cool. They become the people that he models himself after. That's what it feels like they're setting up. That it's almost like Beckett is to Han Solo what,

in the beginning of Last Crusade, when young Indiana Jones sees the fedora guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know? Yeah. And it's like, because Beckett's even got the holster.

He's got the vibe. It's like... Yeah, no, but it's that thing. It's like Han Solo's like, right, I don't have to slave away in the empire. I could actually just like be this guy. Right. Like I could do this shit.

And there's such a nice driving force of like, he's got to get back. He's got to make it bigger so that he can get back and find his love. Yeah, he's still got this motivation because he's separated from kira played adequately by emilia clark in this movie who i i know she's somewhat of a big star these days i do almost the whole time i'm thinking like they just cast her because she's so short that like she's not gonna dwarf alden aaron right she's like five one she's so tiny Because I remember in the Terminator movie,

like Jai Courtney is literally, looks like he's like three feet taller than her. She's just a small person. I did, when they're like going through the Ellis Island thing together in line, I did have that thought. Because this is one of my favorite things about Alden is that he's a little Jew boy,

which makes me feel good that he's now playing Han Solo. Like his listed height is 5'9". I don't buy that. No comment. But I have a question. Please. So, we're sort of saying

the character, Tobias, Han Solo looks up to him. Yes. And if you, let's say, were someone who enjoys Blank Check, who was like, I want to do my own show. We're your Beckett. You're Han Solo.

You're scraping by. You want to find a way to smuggle on our level right you're saying someone might want to start their own podcast start a blank blimp check perhaps that's a free idea that's where the money is we're making tens of dollars per episode

well once you've recorded your show the next steps are reaching listeners building an audience god these things sound impossible i i don't even i'm stressed out even just thinking about i don't even know where i get started david do you have 9.99 a month for you know available maybe well yeah i think yeah yeah pull that off yeah i might have to cancel you know some subscriptions well audio sports illustrated sure which i never read it's just cheaper than toilet paper uh uh toilet papers well we'll talk

about that later audio boom can help you out they got a 9.99 monthly subscription plan for hosting and distribution here's what you get okay 200 minutes for each episode wow that's incredible you get that for 9.99 so you're done listing the things no branded home page on the audio boom platform wow two things for 9.99 that's a great deal. I'm going to keep going. What? An embeddable player for web and social media. Embeddable? Unlimited storage.

Unlimited. You can schedule the episodes so they post. Yeah, Ben likes to schedule it. Usually, if I'm actually on time with the episode being released, I was able to put it up, set it, and then forget it. Yeah, set it and forget it. That's the ben hosley way uh plus uh you get their partnerships audio has partnerships with apple podcast google

play spotify stitcher tune in pending approval for each platform but your show can be eligible for any of those things and you got analytics you got how often it's been downloaded stats baby age and gender and location and what devices are people listening to the show on and so much more so to start up for your $9.99 monthly subscription plan go to audioboom.com and sign up today

that sounds so difficult though you have to find Slash guitarist from Guns N' Roses and get him to help you start no you just go to a-u-d-i-o-b-o-o-m dot com slash s-t-A-R-T. That's all you need to do. Audioboom slash start.

Does slash need to be next to me while I type in the URL? No, just Audioboom dot com slash start, you maniac. All right, let's talk about Hanzo. Okay, so Rio's got a bunch of arms. Val is Tandy Newton, who's having such a good resurgence right now. She's so good in this movie, and it's a bummer that she's not in more of it. I kind of wish they had subverted expectations and had Beckett be the one who dies earlier. The only thing I have to say about that is Woody is really good in this.

He's very good. I like what he's doing, but yeah, I think I might have more fun with her. I also think there's a point for about 40 minutes where the character has kind of nothing to do. They'll keep on cutting back to him doing stuff, but it sort of feels he has no narrative function again until the end.

He doesn't really. He gets lost for a while. Well, yeah, because his purpose in this movie, apart from initially inspiring him, inducting him, is basically to say to Han Solo,

like, you think you have things figured out, but you shouldn't think that and you shouldn't trust anyone. You should be like me, just kind of like, you know, fuck the world, I work out for myself. Right. Then there's like an hour where he's like a quiet ally

in the set pieces, and then at the end he proves his thesis correct. He'll sort of sidle in and be like, but, you know, Kira is a little weird. Don't, you know, keep your eye on her. Yeah. But he doesn't, you're right. He doesn't do a lot.

But yes, initially, him, Tandy, and Jon Favreau as Chef Casper himself. Chef Casper, he's here. What do you think of this character? I won't stop talking about how good his Cubanos are, trying to get Oliver Platt to invest in his track.

Rio love it visually. He looks like a monkey. He's got a bunch of arms he's an ardinian i like favreau uh the character felt a little off to me i couldn't figure out what it was he's not totally clicking in a way where he's he's funny like he feels funny adjacent if that makes sense trying real hard yeah he's all goof he's all like's going to be great. And I do kind of like how loose and not a jerk he is. Yeah. Yeah.

There's something about him. That's I was looking at it and I was like, I don't find it annoying. This is funny on paper. I don't know why I'm not laughing, but something isn't connecting. So something that I just really responded to is that he's pointing at me. He's like not a jerk,

right? Yeah. He's a nice guy. The whole overall tone of this movie that I feel like what was lacking is like, this is a scumbag movie. This is a scumbag movie. I love scum. Ben responded to that. I love scum bum movies.

Yeah. Okay. And to me, it felt maybe it's just a Disney-fied thing. But it's like, they never really go there. Like, even the bad guy is bad. You can tell, like, he's done some shit. We could have gotten scummier. It's not scummy enough, I think.

It even looks gritty, but it isn't gritty. It never feels as scummy and dangerous as the cantina in the first Star Wars. Which genuinely feels uncomfortable. And same with Jabba's Palace. It feels genuinely uncomfortable. A fight could break out.

The problem is. Right. You know, and this happens at the end of the movie, but someone Akira. Is it Akira? Who says to him like, you're kind of want to be a hero at heart. Right. And he's like, what? No.

And they're trying to plant the seed for like, well, Han Solo does end up being heroic. But like, fuck off. Like, I don't care. It also sucks to plant that because the whole thing that's good about Han Solo's arc in the first movie when he shows up

at the end like it is I mean I know I've seen Star Wars so many times it's not but like it is it's surprising

when he shows up what's great about Han Solo's arc in the original Star Wars is that he's trying so hard not to care

and he fails somehow he gets involved he's like Rick in Casablanca right or like Rick in Rick and Morty

he's in it just for that Sash special one so why do you keep bringing the worst most toxic fan bases up who have you got next what's like another one don't worry i got a whole list oh my god that's like a long it's touching the floor um no han solo you know he's an outlaw he's like those guys who kneel uh during the national anthem in the NFL cut that out double it keep it in a double what's up I don't fucking know all right um uh Jesus anyway yeah don't make him be a hero right right just don't right the point is like keep it come later I don't know till I make him an anti-hero they're trying to make him both you know that he's in the movie oh you think that's the move yeah he should turn and be like i hope our opening weekend's higher than like pirates of the caribbean at world's end

can i re-announce memorial day opening weekends am i right can i announce there's an opening weekend joke in deadpool too can i hold on can we get a high five yeah yeah can i Can I announce a big distribution of comedy points that happened last night? Oh, yeah. Please. Go ahead. We saw the movie at the Alamo Drafthouse. That's true. Our server came up to us.

I forget what his name was before the movie started. I don't think he gave us his name. He might have. He was like, you've been here before. You're like, yeah. He was like, okay, cool. Makes my job a lot easier. You know how to order this and that.

Also, I want you to know, even though we cured the solo specials, which were alcoholic beverages beverages in solo cups i'd wear three out of the four they were great i got really drunk watching this i was gonna say you you kept ordering and i was like wow griffin must be fucking and i have not been sleeping or eating much uh i'm doing great um but um there he was like i also want to let you know that the deadpool menu is still in effect and the chimichanga is particularly fantastic. Ben, very earnestly, very straight-faced, beautiful delivery, turned to our server who he had met 15 seconds

earlier in what could have come off as a dick move and said, excuse me, I have a question. Does the chimichanga know that it's a chimichanga? This poor man. Just trying to service food and to his credit very straight faced i was like basically ben handed him a baton and he just grabbed it seamlessly and kept running and said it's a very self-aware chimichanga he was totally a good sport it was really funny um but yeah i mean comedy points all around oh yeah we pulled a a string and comedy points fell from the ceiling onto the entire audience like a you know ski ball like tickets

like 50 tickets just came out anyway none of us ordered the chimichanga none of us ordered them they did sound pretty good they sounded pretty good i just wasn't in a chimichanga mood not a fan of beans. So. Well, I'm full of beans. Clearly today. What's gotten into you? Yeah. So I'm like so into this movie.

You're into the first half hour. Right. And then there's the bit where he goes to them, realizes. I love this that he picks up on it. Sure. That he knows a scoundrel. So he knows what to look for. Right.

Because he says like, you're the ranking officer, Captain. pandy newton's like i guess you are like because he's wearing captain in battle gets promoted to a higher rank because someone else died yeah and hanso looks at him and goes like there are bullet holes there so either you're invincible right or you stole that off a dead man right and he's like what's your point kid you know they're like should we snap his neck or shoot him and he's like i want in i'm like you and the best pilot in the galaxy let me in you think he's gonna win them over they report him yeah they're like uh-huh hey arrest this man right throw him in the pit with the beast yeah there's a beast he gets in the pit mud step mud step this is totally for me effective prequel stuff this is what you want this is what i want you're happy with this i'm happy with it too i like that you bought i'm happy with this because it's not

a dumb like oh this is how they met yeah i bet you didn't know i like it because it's playing off the tension of a prequel which is how do they get from this point to the point that we know how they're gonna be friends right yeah and it's it's pretty nice that like han solo frees him yeah you know like that that adds some emotional resonance which is i feel like and you know this is back especially back when you were a kid and it was just the original movies but you'd read all those books right and they'd always be like oh chewbacca owes han a life debt right like what the fuck does that mean but when you're a kid that sort of gets lodged in your brain yes i guess that's this yeah and they didn't make it too explicit they never have a scene where like chewbacca goes like

right i just like the look of chewbacca in the mud he's really dirty they get out that's what i actually i was gonna say that's what i like it's a muddy it's a mud scene i mean i love that i mean come on let's get let's get dirty let's get let's get dirty but i like also that the dynamic isn't like they're just like oh we're immediate immediately friends they're in it together because they're literally half bonded together it's like the defiant ones for five minutes and then they're then they and yeah anyway han talks his way onto the ship uh i like that where he's like don't leave without me and they're like leave without you you're about to get arrested and then of course right as they're like

lifting off they see him there and they're like fuck this kid well I like that Ryo's like yeah this is the Ryo moment I like I guess it's just him being like dude he got out of the pit that's pretty impressive game recognized game so then they get on the ship and now it's like

okay Chewbacca and han have been inducted into this group of scoundrels here we go they gotta pull off a big heist gotta travel around the galaxy with them so he can get back and find kira and i'm like die is cast i like this movie i like the story they're telling they're gonna be smoking cigarettes they're gonna be swearing right they're gonna be bad right right yeah so into it and then what the train heist happens first right um yeah then the next thing is the train heist i mean well there's that scene where they're around the campfire which is i think it's quite nice yeah like uh i like the it's obvious there's nothing this is i mean movie like guardians of the galaxy pulls this trick too

but yeah that thing where he's trying to translate chewbacca's yeah he's searching for his i don't know if he's a tribe or family but it's like what's the difference you know and like that's you're like oh i get it the movie's about like han finding a family but that can't be what the movie's about because one han doesn't have a he's han solo right two he just hangs out with chewbacca three, like, that's never been part of his character is like he really wants to be part of a community. No. But whatever.

Part of his character is struggling to exist in a community. Yes. Yes. And usually, even if you're in like a group of like thieves,

I mean, the rule is... And you have experience being in that position. Oh, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, 100%. Yeah.

Yeah, we used to do a lot of shoplifting. Go on. What was the point you were going to make? I feel like you're still out for yourself. Sure. Like, that's what doesn't... It's like, it would be more interesting if they were all sort of like infighting and

just, you know, manipulating each other. That's what thieves, bad people do. Now, here's something... They're not like, oh, you're kind of like my dad figure. Sure. Right, right. Like, right away. It's like, no, I might stab you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, here's something I find interesting like Oh you're kind of like My dad figure Sure Right right Like right away No I might stab you

Yeah yeah yeah Now here's something I find interesting What about broth though Uh the The villain Is that the villain No broth

What do you think about broth Who's broth Like it's soup You need a bone broth You need a bone broth Oh god I don't know that I literally thought

You were saying a character's name Was broth Well there is Bosk He gets mentioned Oh god I love Listen I pump my fist Bosk I like That guy Boskf. Well, there is Bosk. He gets mentioned. Oh, God. I pump my fist. Bosk, I like. That guy I like. I think Bosk is pretty smart. Can I throw something crazy

out? Okay. Bosk is my favorite of the Bounty Hunter. I think Bosk is cooler than Boba Fett. Oh, you take him over Boba Fett? 100%. I'd rather see Bosk as Star Wars story. I like TC-14. I like Bosk, baby. I mean, not TC. I'd see the Bosk, baby. I like IG-88, not TC-14.

The Bosk, baby. He's the pirate dude, right? Bosk. Bosk is the one who's just a lizard. He's the lizard man in a yellow jumpsuit. Because then there's... Who's the guy who just has like a towel? Dengar.

Dengar just has like a towel on his head. He's got a diaper head. Yeah, he's got diaper. And then IG-88's just a robot. Yeah, he's a rabbit. And then you have Forlom and Zuckus. Oh, yeah. Zuckus is a bug.

Right, and Forlom is like C-3PO, but black with a bug head. Yeah. That's all of them, right? Yeah, I want to look at Zuckus. Yeah, he's cool. And then Mr. Boba Fett. Yeah, they're cool. They're a cool bunch.

Yeah, they're a good group of guys. You don't need their kind of scum. Yeah, I like IG-88 because he looks like a gun. Yeah, me too. What if they did like an entourage with the bounty hunters? Great. Sure. Good.

I would be into that. And Jabba is like their Ari Gold. What was your... I can't remember. Anyway, they're teams like us. What I was going to say... What were you going to say? What I was going to say that I find interesting is

all the other actors when doing press for this movie have been like, this is Ron Howard's movie. And they're like, what about the Lord Miller stuff? And they're like, that was kind of a very long expensive dress rehearsal. There's very little of that footage. Tapley's article said 70%. Chris Tapley in variety

was Howard, essentially. And honestly, watching it, I was like, I feel like it's more but also maybe just a lot of the action was already kind of put to bed

right you know originally they wanted Ron Howard to just sort of finish it out and do selected reshoots and see what he could

re-edit but they did fire Lord and Miller the thing is Disney re-shot Rogue One 50% of it i've heard like you know a lot of it but it is credited to the original director and the original director was

always on set for the reshoot but i heard that the deal with rogue one was they said to gareth edwards we're gonna take this movie away from you you can agree to that and we'll let you go around and have the press tour and take credit for the movie right and and you can be on set while other people are overseeing it we'll listen to your input yeah because that's dj rules would you'd have to fire him otherwise he has to be there and they threw that offer to laura miller and they said we don't want to be credited with a movie that we're not making sure so they walked i guess you know i mean they were told to walk yeah they were fired right um but they had the option to stay on and save face and they probably would have brought someone less

prestigious than Ron Howard. Right. But yeah, Ron Howard comes in, he looks at the movie and okay, go ahead. The interesting thing I was going to say is

every other actor has gone, this is Ron Howard's movie, this is Ron Howard's movie, he really saved us. Tandy Newt in interviews has said, I find it weird how much the thing's overhyped.

90% of my footage was directed by Lord Miller. I mean, she only has three scenes, essentially. Because she's got the opening battle scene, then she has the campfire scene, and then there's heist where she dies. That's it. I just find that interesting. So maybe they...

Apparently most of her stuff was shot by them. And this is the section of the movie that's really kind of jiving for me. That's all. No, that's fair. I mean, I like Ron Howard. I don't love him. I mean, he's made like five movies I really like.

And he's made like five movies I kind of hate. And like ten other movies that are okay. And then ten other movies that don't exist. He's made a lot of movies. No, I agree with you. I don't hate him. I like him. And, you know, obviously he's like, you know,

Jesus Christ. I'm sorry. I have two devices that are synced up. You know, he's in Arrested Development. So you always enjoy, you know,

you think of, I, for some reason, as a kid, saw his episode of The Simpsons like 1,000 times. I saw every episode of The Simpsons 500 times.

But I saw his even more. reputation is like, oh, that's one of the nicest guys in Hollywood. Yeah, a well-liked. It's nice that he has the lucas connection yeah yeah he was in american graffiti and right they're old friends lucas offered him one of the prequels that was his original plan kind of interesting right the original plan was lucas would do phantom menace

and then howard would do two spielberg would do three yeah and both of them were like you should make these yeah and my guess is they probably saw trouble ahead where they were like yeah this is just who wants that pressure like that's kind of a thankless job and they probably both knew what George was like you know on like Return of the Jedi where he's kind of the boss so yeah anyway yeah uh but you know Ron Howard has made some good movies well no he's made a couple bad movies recently but Rush is phenomenal that's a terrific movie. Agreed. Inferno doesn't exist.

Yeah, really doesn't exist. In the Heart of the Sea, I saw that one. I never saw that one. It's rough. Yeah. It's ambitious. I think the script is the problem with that movie. But I don't really like Frost Nixon, which was his last. Why is this still happening?

Yes. Mute. Mute. I thought I had. Cinderella Man is okay okay uh-huh you know it's kind of well made it's so cheesy i don't like that movie other than giamatti uh the missing is like kind of good you know like it's sort of a fun little genre movie a beautiful mind is is watchable it's watchable i think the grinch movie sucks yeah i mean that movie is a nightmare i think ed tv is terrific like i've always always been a huge fan of that movie is ed tv his best movie

the last 20 years i guess so because 13 is right outside i mean that's the best film and then i like the early comedies i don't like cocoon but i i like uh i like the keaton movies obviously yeah i mean gung-ho is like not a good movie but like it's sort of like it kind of moves yeah but splash is good night shift fox night shift's good yeah um uh what's it in the paper is like watchable oh the paper rules i mean that's set up like my mom's work i love that movie uh the willow is good will it's interesting i guess yeah uh parenthood i forgot he made parenthood oh parenthood's very good yeah that's Parenthood? I forgot he made Parenthood. Oh, Parenthood's very good. Yeah, that's a solid movie.

Yeah. I forgot he made that. Yeah. He's made so many movies. And Backdraft is pretty good. He has made so many movies. So many movies. Ransom?

He made Ransom. Right. Which, oh, God. The fucking... Good score. Yeah. I jam to the Ransom score. What a crazy career.

Yeah. Anyway. He did okay. He's brought on, and it was odd because it felt like oh he's here just to finish up someone else's movie but then he really kind of took over it he's clearly into it i remember he was on social media too and he was like publishing pictures every day he loved making a star wars movie that's obvious because they shut the movie down for like two weeks to bring him in and assess what needs to be done they also

fired the editor and replaced the editor oh interesting scalia was hisro Scalia was his hire. Because I know they have been like... And they considered firing Young, I think, or at least like they said like, do you want to keep Bradford Young or do you want a new DP? Right. And he wanted to keep Bradford Young.

And he never used to be... He said they connected right away. They really, like he really loved Bradford Young's like take on the movie. Howard never used to be a very visually interesting filmmaker. He was a very good storyteller,

but he started doing those Anthony Dodd-Mantle movies and like Rush looks amazing. Heart of the Sea looks very good. It does. Yeah, Inferno I can't speak for. No. I don't know.

It's like a weird jambalaya, and then they pull off this train heist, but Val sacrifices herself, right? Yeah, she blows up. This sequence is kind of fun. I like the train sequence. I think it's not great. It's cool.

No, I like it. I got really excited at the setup. I'm like, this seems fucking cool. The troopers have magnet feet they're moving really fast shibaka's got goggles i'm like all the pieces on the board get me really pumped and then i don't find it that viscerally thrilling but it's fun it's a little gray because the palette is so white and gray because it's snowy and mountains and stuff it's okay i at a certain point you kind of realize like oh this is just plot device like this is just we're gonna lose val we're gonna lose the score and it's gonna be like what spurs the rest of the movie yeah and it feels a little train together it's fun like kind of fun there's some fun beats and then emphasis nest is who's this sort of villain

in this sort of samurai uniform and emphasis theme song sounds like it's like it's like the score from the thin red line it's like yeah right it's a bunch of like it's like it's like the score from the thin red line it's like yeah right it's a bunch of like it's like a polynesian choir yeah i i kind of dig the look yeah but but they're kind of like oh no it's emphasis and you're like it's who right is that a person is that a group what they end up selling with emphasis i'm buying but it's also like this feels like a lot to throw on us this late, and it feels kind of disconnected from the rest of what this movie is doing. You can't just say, oh, they're marauders.

Right. We're like, oh. Oh, of course, marauders. Yeah. That's a word I use all the time. I'm buying Enfys Nest in the sense that I would like a screenplay that started with that as a starting point for the idea. I get what you're saying.

Rather than this folded into a break. Okay but so after the the heist goes wrong uh rio get dies too he gets shot right um and so you've just got han chewbacca and beckett yeah they go to the crimson dawn ship uh-huh right yes to to meet with their boss so they don't have a score for which to be clear crimson dawn is not a horror movie it's a gothic romance now again i am not great on uh star wars expanded universe this is a thing right like crimson dawn has already existed i can't speak to that i don't know if that's true. Maybe not. The name was so familiar. I think because of Crimson Peak. That great movie.

Yeah. Then who are like the mobsters in the old Star Wars books and shit? They exist, but I think because Crimson Dawn is set up to be this fucking

resurgence of Darth Maul thing. Yeah. And the people who have been following the sort of appendix material, the comics and the cartoons, if they knew Crimson Dawn, that would tip them off, right?

That's why I think it has to be a new thing. But I can't speak to this and someone's probably yelling online about the fact. Yeah, I'm trying to look it up. This is where the movie weirdly... Maybe not. Maybe it's new for this movie. The balloon is untied and and from here on out, we're pinching it,

and the air starts coming out. I really like Paul Bettany's performance. Yeah, I was going to say, I agree with you, but I do like this scene. I do too. I like the set. I keep doing like a triangle.

I like him. I like the set. But from the moment he sees Kira again, I stop understanding what the movie's trying to do. Agreed. I stop knowing what story they're trying to tell.

Because basically now, at this point in the movie, you've got Crimson Dawn with Kira and Paul Bettany. They need their stuff. She's sort of under indentured servitude. Yeah, you get the impression that her way off of Corellia was like, right, she joined

this organized crime thing. How did you get out? I didn't. Now she's just stuck with Crimson Dawn, who are gangsters. They're a crime syndicate right there's like five syndicates and they're one of them i don't know their logo is like a circle with a line right and uh which because crime syndicate should always have logos i love that when a crime syndicate has a logo david's all about branding like imagine like the mafia pulling up and like you know there's like a big rose on the side of their truck like the mafia everyone knows them here they are yeah broken lizard a comedy mafia they

have their logo of course um and then you've got uh lando i don't know i don't know yeah lando right it takes a while for lando to come in though this movie also feels very long to me so it's way too long how long is it i think it's two hours 20 minutes oh geez yeah no two hours 15 okay it's 135 minutes i'd say it feels 230 it does it feels long and it feels like a movie that should be 145 it's a classic movie where when it's over like when the kessel run essentially is over when like the second and last set piece is over you're like oh the movie's over and then the movie's like 20 more minutes yeah it's weird because then they start talking about camp uh but i like joy i saw it with my girlfriend and she like at that moment yeah like just like put her head on my shoulder with

like just exhaustion with the movie just like it just kind of wears you down yeah um so they meet with paul bettany as dryden voss he's given a really interesting performance fucking great i just we turned to each other and both said, such a good actor. In unison, we just went, good actor. He's playing it so restrained and friendly and threatening without, I feel like, doing any of the cliches you could do.

I agree. He's playing off beat in a way that's really interesting. It's nuts to think that this was originally Michael K. Williams in a mo-cap performance as a lion man. Yeah. It was going to be that character. Yeah.

And then because he's attached to and just started crying spontaneously because Michael K. Williams is attached to the Sundance show happened. Leonard couldn't do reshoots. Yeah. Like it's nuts. Everything's crazy. And then Paul Bettany said he takes away movies from me.

It's not like, did you hear the Paul Bettany story? He said he just texted Ron Howard because they work together on the Da Vinci code. Yeah. So they know each other. And, and then Paul Bettany said I hate the way movies are made it's nuts like did you hear the Paul Bettany story where he said he just texted Ron Howard because they worked together on the Da Vinci Code so they know each other and Beautiful Mind

which he's great and Beautiful Mind which he's terrific in he's maybe the best performance in Beautiful Mind I would argue he's very good in it I've never seen that

with my mom and going like who the fuck is this guy well I was already all in on Paul Bettany because he was in Gangster No. 1 which is this phenomenal

that was sort of his launch movie yeah that's 2000 but that wasn't there yeah it was a year before but he's kind of got this vibe in Gangster No. 1

where he's like kind of scary because he's playing a young Malcolm McDowell in that movie but there is something very sensitive about him you know even when

he's playing heavies that I love and then Vision's my favorite character in the MCU hands down no question no competition

I always love him I'm happy that he's in big movies again now because I think he's a guy he talked about how he was really in the MCU, hands down. No question, no competition. I always love him. I'm happy that he's in big movies again now. Me too. He talked about how he was really at the end of his career. Yeah. I remember when he got cast as Vision, he told some story about... His agent called him, dropped him,

said, you're never going to work in this town again. Almost. Literally. He had just washed out on some audition, I think. Yeah. And his agent was like, this is just not working anymore. And Joss Whedon was like, hey, you're going to play the Vision because you're the guy in the movie.

So let's have you play Vision. Right. And like it like saved his career. Yeah. He also like he turned down a bunch of shit to make like that Darwin movie. And also he did. He directed the movie with Jennifer Connelly and Anthony Mackie. I believe it's called.

Right. He did a couple. He's got this nice relationship with Jennifer Connelly and Anthony Mackie. I believe it's called. He did a couple weird He's got this nice relationship with Jennifer Connelly that seems very happy. One of the sexiest couples alive. Those are two of the most attractive people. They're very attractive people.

Wait, I was going to say something else. Oh, anyway. No, he texted Ron Howard and was like, ha ha, LOL, could I be in Star Wars?

And Ron Howard was like, hmm, give me a minute. And then was like, actually. Do you want to be above the title? You want to be getting an and? Yeah.

You want an and here? He's got a Ben vibe. I mean, yeah. Got the coloring, you know. He dresses great. He's great at fashion. Who was the guy we were saying could play a good older Ben? Oh, fuck.

Who was it? Oh, Eric Stoltz. Yeah, Eric Stoltz. Right. Yeah, totally. older ben oh fuck who was it there was oh eric stoltz yeah eric stoltz right yeah totally because we were saying that kate old laundry bag is obviously hosley a ben worse story the prequel right but eric stoltz is the like ben settling in like learning how to love or it could be like a ben sitcom where he's like the frustrated dad yeah exactly yeah yeah with the upside down exclamation point sure um anyway rob

joke for you rob heads out there was that on netflix rob no you're thinking a real rob rob rob was on cbs that was rob with the two exclamation points upside down yeah okay so dragon boss is like sorry guys you fucked up i'm gonna have to kill you I just like that thing at the end where he's like if you don't pull this off we're out of options you know like really friendly

but where he's basically saying you will die but also the chemistry is very weird between Clark and Aaron Rick from this point on because I think

they're pretty good at the beginning of the movie together they have that like young kids they kiss good they do good kiss well their mouths are at similar heights but um but they also like from this moment on

their tricep this thing of like oh she's kind of changed she can't really trust her anymore she's very cool and collected now she's all dressed up you know i'm not feeling like the tension of she's totally gone or he's trying to find her in there it just feels kind of off also the problem is like uh she's like i'm different now and he's like no you're not the same and she's like no i'm not and the audience is like no she's not and he's like buy it she doesn't she's fine feel transformed she just feels less engaging right and then they go see the gangster and the gangster's basically like cupping her face the whole time and it's like kira i love you and han's like kira's so into me right now come on dude the whole thing is very read the room odd

and then it's just like i don't really care about this mission they're on because i don't see like it's like the mission is just to get some hyper fuel and his best friend he's just like should be more depressed than he is yeah but he's an asshole like I actually don't mind that

yeah right Han now has gotten back together with Kira at least physically he's in the same space as her so what's he in it for

you know like I understand it's like well they're scoundrels they pull off a mission because they that's what they do but it's also there's kind of no emotional drive left in the movie at this point now it's like, well, they're scoundrels. They pull off a mission because that's what they do. But it's also, there's kind of no emotional drive left in the movie at this point. Now it's just got to figure it out.

So, right, let's get a ship. We need a fast ship. Kira knows a guy. It's Lando. Okay, now we're going to get 20 minutes of Lando. This scene rules. This poker scene is great. It's what you want.

Also, well shot. Looks good. Yeah. Love how it looks. Yeah, and now it's like, like okay here's the one character who's behaving the way we want all the characters to act in this movie yes that's true um he's got the vibe right yeah yeah the sabacc game is cool yeah a bunch of beasts weird aliens i love that he catches the the device that lando has up the sleeve but they save that for the end payoff

that's like pretty good right because everyone knows like he won the he won the millennium in a card game so we're like is this it he's just gonna win it right now like right when when han doesn't blow up his spot i was like that's a weird like just kind of like nothing and which i was just chalking up to this movie was reshot they're probably a bunch of dangling threads pretty good checkoff's gun to like bring it in at the very end. Yeah, I think that's fine. That's like solid, yeah. But yeah, but I also like Lando's whole vibe is like,

I run this place, I'm great. And then they're like, you need your ship for a job. And he's like, all right, I guess so. And then you like find out that his ship's been like impounded because he like parked next to a hydrant or whatever. And he's like, what do you mean? It's just normal. Oh, this is crazy. He's too cool to care care but also not caring means that you get in trouble like the whole time

right the whole time oh lando is like living on the edge like he is fucking broke like he's basically like gambling to stay alive yeah ships impounded oh all right i cut the door, cut the door. It's a good source of protein. God, it's been a while since I recorded one of these. It's a good source

of protein. Sir, can you not yell right in the mic? I'm Admiral Oryxbar. Oh. Jesus. It's a good source of protein.

Why are you laughing at my face? You're sorry. My fish face. Yeah, it's just that you're right. Not a lot of people walk in with fish faces, but it's you. It's Admiral Ackbar of the Rebel Alliance. No, it's his cousin, Admiral Oryxbar. Wow.

What are you here to talk about? I need a source of protein I ran out of Rx bars I need a good deal okay so you you do usually eat Rx bars yeah they're a good whole food protein bar they're friends of the show they've they've uh uh advertised with us before they're we actually really like their uh food yeah I food. Yeah, I'm Griffin. How's it going? Admiral, this is Griffin Newman. Yeah, I eat them a lot actually when I'm on set because most food makes me need to shit.

So it's just like, oh, here's a good, I don't have to act for six more hours trying to hold in diarrhea. I'll just eat an RX bar. Binding, you're saying. I mean, RX bars are good. They're like a protein bar that doesn't sound like,

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No, it's not a trap. It's a check. Promo code check. Oh. All right. I said that trap it's a check promo code check oh all right he's he's just floating out he's in that chair he can fly apparently no he's in that floating chair thing oh yeah he's on the flying chair thing what do you think of that ben uh so where are we at lando you know lando's cool cool capes i like the jokes cape jokes are funny

again he his character hits like a lot of really just like funny moments yeah that aren't like stupid like whereas han every joke of his is so throwaway and cheeky and just so you know it's it's always going to be a tough balance with these prequels of the how many winks do you do and some of them where it's like what's your name Chewbacca I'm gonna need a nickname where I'm like I never really thought about Chewy is like a nickname Han invented right wait should we call you Baca right like it's like some of these things like okay can we tell him the joke I made to you? Yeah, please. So he goes, we're going to need a nickname. And I turned to you and said, Greg Silverberg.

It was a weird one. I had to think about it. He laughed. I laughed. It was funny. Listeners, he laughed. Here's another thing that hit me watching this movie i kind of think the finn arc is weirdly the better han solo movie the thing i like a lot in the force awakens is that scene where han solo

totally sees through finn yeah and it's like kid i know a liar what does he call him again a big deal mr big deal yeah you know, they can see through it. You know? Yeah. You've forgotten one thing. Women always know the truth. Right. Yeah.

And that scene I love because you're like, oh, this must be what Han Solo was like when he was young. Han recognizes it because he was this fake until you make a guy. And he was in the Empire and washed out. Right. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah. But Finn is actually very funny. I mean, he's got a lot of energy because he's able to make his own character john bag is a very compelling actor he's very good yeah in that movie yeah and you know i'm thinking about this movie and then

i'm thinking about the force awakens yeah and i'm thinking about like how much better the force awakens yeah than this movie yeah like because i can you're remembering a scene like you're right and i'm like i have that scene in my head. Like, I know that scene really well. When we sat down to watch solo, I had just seen it like 10 days earlier and I was like, I don't remember what the fucking thing. It's already kind of leaking from my brain. I loved looking at it. I like looking at it.

Yeah. I was never, I'm always going to be into star Wars. Like I like, it's a nice sandbox. Like it's a nice sandbox, but, but then you just go like the universe feels small when they keep on trying to tie everything back into these central points that we already know and even rogue one which i like more theoretically by being like new cast of characters is tying so much into one event that we know yeah i'm just like give me a star wars movie that's like two young dreamers on the outskirts trying to make it out and get a better

life you know and maybe that's what Rian Johnson's movie can be. Stop doing these prequels and shit. If you want to give us a quote-unquote Star Wars story, give us a Star Wars story. And just pick real human experiences and place them into this universe. Aren't they starting a streaming

service? Yeah, they are. And Jon Favreau is going to do a Star Wars live-action TV show. Now, this is a movie that I would be fine to watch at home. I just saw Mike Ryan and he was saying that Solo should probably be a TV show.

It feels like watching six consecutive episodes and not getting to the season finale. And I would have actually liked it better because I would have been able to watch it at home. Yeah. But then I feel like

what they're going to do is they're going to make a TV show out of what you're pitching, which is just unconnected characters and just a unique sort of scenario based in this universe. What he said the show is going to be is set after Return of the Jedi when the Rebels have succeeded. It's going to be set in that sort of middle patch between the old movies and the new movies. It's going to be like next generation kids growing up in the freedom.

Yeah, cool. Sounds cool. Whatever. Give me a totally fucking new character. It's going to be like next generation kids growing up in the freedom. Yeah, cool. Sounds cool. Give me totally fucking new characters. And even I think Star Wars Rebels does a really good job of that. It's the reason I prefer Rebels to Clone Wars, which I've only watched pieces of. Yeah.

The CGI Clone Wars. But Rebels is just like, here are five new characters. And sometimes they'll tie into things you know. Sometimes Lando will appear. Sometimes you go, oh, that's how this happened. But by and large, it's like here are five people characters and sometimes they'll tie into things you know sometimes lando will appear sometimes you go oh that's how this happened but by and large it's like here are five people with a struggle you get and you're gonna love watching them try to exist in this world there's so many

pockets in this universe that's the stuff i like in this movie yeah yeah that's what i always like what about like a courtroom kind of movie you know god imagine night court set in the star wars universe that would be so good did not expect ben to say that yeah like natlock in the star wars universe yeah i will say aesthetically aside from the bradford young of it all i like that this movie i think hits the best balance of the new disney star wars movies and getting what i love about star wars is like the thing i love about fucking New York, which is the contrast right side by side of these things that are super shiny and super grimy

and things that are very high class and very scuzzy. Outside the Chrysler building or whatever. I don't know. I love that mishmash of all the socioeconomic levels and because of that, the different levels of technology. It's something that George Lucas kind of forgot in the prequels, I think. Which just become the, you know, the Parisians like dancing, you know, before the society crumbles.

Oh, sure. Yes, right, right. Well, then that was his take. Right, the courtesans and what have you. Yeah. But I mean, you know, and I like the way, you know, like one thing I love about love about the last jedi which is again a much better movie than this movie yeah is stuff like that where he shows you the nice the casino planet yeah and then he's like you know but yeah underneath right yeah and then benicio del toro shows up with his boots around his neck right which look that works

better boots neck narratively and metaphorically on just a pure visceral whiz-bang level. I like seeing the thing side-by-side visually in this movie. Whiz-bang. You brought up his character, Belisio. My dad calls him Benedicio.

What's the matter, man? He was a good shitty scumbag. He's a good scumbag character he's got a jughead hat he like lives up to it and you believe it the Lando thing of you don't know whether or not you can trust this guy I don't know how

Beckett never really feels dangerous to me not really other than when he rats him out on the battlefield no Beckett doesn't really feel dangerous he feels a little grimy right but he doesn't really feel no one in this movie feels that dangerous except for bettany who i do i do think conveys threat quite well and i think lando works because you actually can't read him you don't know where he's just a fucking blast yeah i mean right let's talk

about the other thing that i think totally works in this movie. It's a bridge arc. I think they shortchanged her by really rushing through it. Sure. But L3 is fucking cool. She's great. Played by Phoebe Waller-Bridge of Fleet Bag. She's the fucking best. She's writing this show, Killing Eve, right now that I'm not watching much TV and it's great.

I'm watching this show. It's like the only TV show in the last 10 years that has grown literally every single episode yeah that's true which is very hard it's like a runaway success uh it's great and she's great yes l3 37 if you haven't watched fleabag watch it it's six episodes it's one of the best comedy shows of the decade it's awesome and she's a droid yeah uh she's kind of clunky looking i like how she i love her. I love that she looks like R2-D2 and C-3PO combined. Her limbs are very flat and sort of like wooden planky R2-D2-ish.

She's got a posture. She sort of walks with some attitude. It's a really good physical performance. She did it all on set. She wore the suit and then they CGI'd out her green body stocking so she looks skinnier and more... I heard when she auditioned that she did not know

what a droid was which I really liked yeah she had seen a Star Wars movie she's really funny she's cranky yep she's

100% confident that Lando's in love with her but she's like look I'm not interested it's embarrassing yeah yeah she's

a droid rights activist which is an interesting concept for star wars to bring up at this point because that's always been a question a lot of people have where they're like these droids seem like people like they're not just like autobots right like they like have like personalities like so what the fuck like do people own them like what's the relationship here like all of that uh like all that too i think she's really funny i like all her scenes yeah she does die fast but yes the idea i think the cast and has here is like they're always talking about the millennium falcon is a ship with so much personality yeah and like it turns out she is that now where do you land on this um i don't mind i think it's

i actually think it fucks up the movie it makes the movie like really collapse under scrutiny i think so too because the she is set up as lando's friend lando's like companion yes and then she dies and is loaded into the millennium falcon right because she's got the best map in the galaxy right in her brain right so they sort of jack her brain into the ship i don't mind that that's a cool idea in my in order to save the day but that's an odd thing to do when the arc necessarily has to conclude with han winning the milan londo loses the ship which sucks and like it'd be one thing if the arc in the movie was that she really takes a shine to han which and there's no connection they don't have any connection at all in the movie so it's weird it also feels

a little Twilight Zone-y to me. I know people on Twitter today were saying it feels a little Black Mary where it's almost a nightmare that's like now her brain is just caught in here forever.

You think about how long we know the Star Wars universe lasts for and it's like decades later it's still just her brain she can't speak you know being passed around.

I don't mind that. Unkar Plutt just owned her for a while, you know? No, I don't mind that because like, he gave her one quarter portion. I think it's, there's a mention of portions in this movie.

I think it's cool to, to have that weird sort of concept of like, yeah, is this like immortality or is she not a personality? Like that's, I don't care. I find it a little depressing just because she is separated from Lando. Well, that's what I, that's, I just think it's like they had two ideas yeah they have this idea

let's explain why the millennium falcon such a quirky ship right and let's explain how han won the millennium falcon but then they forgot to knit them together right how is it a quirky ship though they're always like oh this old girl you know they always sort of like in the original people just say that about vessels but they're always saying that it never felt like she had a personality it just feels like they were personning her if a little bit but they're it's the whole thing with the millennium falcon is always like what's so special about that hunk of junk right and one thing would always be well it's very fast but the other thing would be oh she made the castle run and you know like where they're like ah she's special you know honestly that's like some nerd

shit i could not there's a good like uh fucking doctor who episode i think it's the one that the doctor's wife yes it occurred to me where it's the opposite where they personify the ship starts suddenly having a physical form and it's now suddenly this relationship he's already had always had with an inanimate object has like a personality that it's like pretty cleverly done. Or there's the, um, doing the inverse feels a little weird to me, especially when it's not based around the relationship that actually matters.

There's also that like Joss Whedon X-Men arc where the danger room becomes like a person. Which is such a good arc. Danger. Yes. And like, that's interesting too, but that's more of the nightmare version, right?

Where it's like, this is actually like a thing you can't just like have it serve a purpose for you anymore but I think to this point it works in one direction far better than it works in the other direction I think so it works better to go hey here's this thing that you feel attached to now we're going to make it a person rather than

saying here's a person we're going to tell you secretly her brain has been inside I don't mind either you know what i'm saying i just don't me yep it's it's the prequel problem again it's the prequel but she is cool and i do like the scene where she uh takes off the restraining bolt during the sebeck i did the castle yeah these fucking things are so barbaric yeah they're just so but and then it's not like she's like an activist where she's actually like oh yes now no she's just sort of like i don't know go free your brothers and the bot's like okay it like rumbles off and i like that the little montage of them

all going like freedom i love robots they're so silly and then she's like, oh, this is great. I like that it's somewhat inadvertent, I guess is my joke. Yeah, I agree with that. So they get land or they do the Kessel Run. What do you think of the Kessel Run? This is like the Ocean's Eleven sequence. It's not. It's not like I feel any tension over this heist.

I don't feel like a clear sense of what the threats are. It's like, okay, I guess it's dangerous I have to pull it off but it just feels like stuff I couldn't describe anything that happens to you in the next 30 minutes of this movie there are images I still remember that raw thing is so stupid because it's like

we have to get the thing to then do another thing but that's like the Ocean's Eleven thing where it's like well we need the hyper fuel but here's a problem hyper fuel just like destabilizes if you don't keep it cool for half an hour. But those movies are based around problem solving. This movie is just based

around conflicts. You know they're going to do it. Yeah, right. That's a problem with any heist movie, but still. Even the smoke thing. Yeah, the castle, the tunnels of the design of it. I was just like like i don't know i didn't hate it i didn't love it i i didn't i don't mind the smoke image like the smoke tunnel

what are you looking up i you'll find out it's gonna be some bullshit yeah you'll love um what do you think of the smoke tunnels cool i mean this all looks i don't mind the smoke tunnels but once he punches through the smoke tunnel is in the maelstrom thing where it's all that just kind of looks like nothing that just kind of looks like cgi it's just a cloudy asteroid with like asteroids yeah and like there's another squid monster and you're like another fucking squid monster and uh it is big it's big but even ben's not can't get it up for this thing yeah yeah i'm like oh wow there's an eye like we've done that before. And it just feels like... The Chewbacca stuff also feels a little crowbarred in where he's like, oh, look, here are my people.

Like, okay, it's fine. It does feel by the numbers. And they're trying to sell it as like, look at this ragtag family that's formed together, but it's like, okay, like Beckett losing everyone he kind of was close with. And L3 dies. Han and Kira, but they don't really seem

to get along that well anymore l3's dead lando doesn't understand once l3's dead lando's kind of like just exhausted like yeah not into it anymore right uh he's kind of fun earlier but then he's just like sad yeah yeah uh and then they do it they land on some other sandy planet you know like a ruined sort of planet and this is when uh judge what's her emperor's nest yeah shows up takes off her helmet and it's like a girl with red hair and the movie's kind of holding on her and you're like am i just supposed to have my mind blown that it's like a young woman like is that that it because like when it happened I had gone to the bathroom the first time I saw it like I took like a two minute bathroom break

and so I was like when the big reveal happened I was like wait am I supposed to know who that is because the movie is really like right and you're like is this supposed to be a younger version of the character I know it was like racking my brain where I'm like who is the fucking you know and then this movie throws in all this shit

when it's like shouldn't we be wrapping up I think now so you were, you know... And then this movie throws in all this shit when it's like, shouldn't we be wrapping up now? I think, no, so you were saying, I think this should not be in the movie. I agree. I like this as a starting point for its own story. But at this point in this movie, it's too fucking much. This is a disaster.

Because she's like, let me tell you the story of this planet that was like ruined by the Crimson Dawn when they came and they took stuff and then they cut their tongues out. We're the good guys. We need the fuel to fight back and we're gonna do it. And the whole

thing is just existing to give Han this like hero moment. Yeah. Where he can like do the right thing. I don't need that. No. I don't need that at all. No. I don't need that. And they set up what looks like it's gonna be a cool fucking western shootout and then said just becomes like it's about ethics and game journalism but uh no

but it just becomes like you know this like ethical like dilemma that they present to him right like all right so are you gonna give the fuel to the bad mobsters right or are you gonna give it to us nice people right. Right. Cool, nice people. Right. He makes a decision. Beckett leaves. Right. Well, then it's the, again, the Ocean's Eleven thing where it's like, he's like, let me tell

you my plan. We don't know what the plan is. And then we watch the plan unfold. Right. Yeah. But Beckett leaves. You're like, okay, kind of a weird arc. They go up, see Paul Bettany.

And he's like, unfortunately, someone tipped me off. He's like, Kira. And he's like, no, I know she's playing seven sides. I just really want Paul Bettany, and he's like, unfortunately, someone tipped me off. He's like, Kira? And he's like, no, I know she's playing seven sides. I just really want, Bettany is killing it in this. Agreed. I really like, I like the thing where he's like, Beck, it's dead. Oh, so sad. You know, and then he's like, looking at the hyper fuel, and he's like, wow, it really

is amazing. How did you fake this? Yeah. And I was like, I didn't fake it. And he's like, no, no, no, no, no. I'm genuinely, I'm showing respect. I think it's a good job. I think you're doing a good performance right now. and then that thing where he's like it's kieran he's like no no kira's got her own ticket we'll handle that later so good in this scene but then oh beckett double reverse he was ratting them out

and it's like this move would maybe work if if Beckett had left them 40 minutes earlier. But when he just like... Right, he's just left. 90 seconds earlier was like, betrayal's partner. It's like, okay. And I don't even know what... And there's also that whole midsection where Beckett isn't really doing anything other than being with the group. I guess the implication is the whole time he...

Or is it more like Hans says, I'm going to pull this shit. And Beckett's like, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to call Paul Bettany right now. Right. And let him know that Hans is about to pull this shit. But like, kind of, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to call Paul Bettany right now. Right. And let him know that Han's about to pull this shit. But like, kind of who cares? Like how long has he been in the,

like they're all working for him anyway. Yeah. Cause like you said, the revelation can't be like, I've been working with them all along. It's like, well, yeah,

we all have, they hired us. And it's trying to prove this. Don't trust anybody point, but it feels like that'd be more effective. Which is fine. Done with Kira. It'd be more effective, like youira and it'd be more effective like

you say if becca had actually vanished from the movie right and and also like here are three things that are more effective becca actually vanishing here being the one who betrays him or uh bettany just sees through it and does everything that bettany does in the scene but he knows that it's a fake because he's a fucking awesome fucking crime boss right you know it's like it's a flex yeah I don't know so then it's like I mean then there's right three more double crosses where Han Solo's like actually I knew you would

betray me right I do like that play I was waiting for someone to zip down it feels like they're gonna pull off a mask yeah right no I like theando and he's Han. They switched. No, I like the thing where

he's like, no, actually, I played you and your guys are dead now. And Beckett, the move is just Han being like, I know that Beckett is so flimsy morally that he'll just switch back to me. Yes. That's fine. That's cool. That's fine. But it's like, I mean... And then there's a little showdown with Dryden

where Kira kills him. Yeah. I mean, and the movie kind of, at this point, amounts to nothing and kind of leaves you with nothing. At this point, the movie's just trying to fill in those little hunts. So you see him shoot first when he shoots Beckett. Okay. You see him be a little bit of a hero.

He gives the thing. But they're like, you should join our, we're thinking of calling it like a rebellion. And he's like, I don't think so so i don't join rebellions okay and they're like well maybe later and he's like maybe well and they say i love you and he says i know it's like who cares and then also there he's like i got this great line on a deal with job of the hut practically like you know right like that's sort of the idea. I thank them for actually not saying Jabba the Hutt because I was leaning to you. But they do kind of do the thing where they're like,

there's a real big gangster on a real sandy planet. He likes to eat at Pizza Hut. Something I wanted to say about Kira, the end and the reveal of her Kira takes over the Crimson Dome it's you know

it's being portrayed as like this bad thing sure and to me I guess you kind of like get it girl yeah whatever I'm like everyone's got to do what it takes

to survive in this universe and I'm tiptoeing in territory that I'm a little nervous about so I'm just saying that now you're tiptoeing into the IDW. It feels to me like it's a male gaze, like overall in this movie.

And that it's almost like, it's that same thing of Jurassic world where it's like, how could a woman want to do this? Where it's like, aren't you stunned? She's the new leader of the Crimson Dog. No, she was an orphan. left her she had to figure

out we're also right because hans deal is like hey come with me i'm thinking of buying a ship and also the only other two female characters in the movie die to give other male characters this is true it is and it's a fucking solo movie. So I'm not surprised. I like the cast. I, you know, I think it's a nice cast,

but that's why I am interested to see what the, the quote unquote true star Wars fan responses to this movie, because it feels like this is what you guys were fucking asking for. Yeah. You know, do you, do you love this? Yeah.

Like not with no judgment judgment but it's just like this feels like what you're complaining i'm not sensing the immediate last jedi blowback of fury no it also doesn't feel like they love it but it's more like dumb right wing star wars merchandise blog i read because i like staring into the sun was like finally this is the disney movie that kind of gets it right not doing cartwheels but he's like at least they're starting to learn their lesson they're like pulling out of a nosedive well my favorite thing is that there's that section of you know right wing whatever you know stupid jerky red pill like fans with jedi temple archive.com great well but you know what i mean

where i feel like i don't they're not my mentions too much but sometimes where they're convinced that like disney knows how bad last jedi was and wants to get rid of ryan johnson and there's some like 17 layer scheme they're executing to push him out the door like where they're like we all know it like right last jedi bombed they have to do damage control yes oh no boo hoo Force Awakens the number one highest grossing domestic film of all time

was followed by a massive domestic drop off of the seventh highest grossing film of all time like if Last Jedi was bombing it would have like

a bomb would have been like Rogue One or below numbers correct yeah it did great it made a lot of money correct

the thing that's weird about Last Jedi Rogue One is also still in the top ten highest grossing movies of all time true the thing that's weird about Last Jedi. But one is also still in the top 10 highest grossing movies of all time. True. The thing that's weird about this. Yeah.

And Last Jedi is, yeah. China is not interested. And it is, you know, Solo is also bombing in China. And it is that thing of like, They have no history with these characters.

They don't care about these movies in the same way. The country doesn't care because those movies weren't in the country then. And right. So it's like, you're watching like, what happens if you just release a star wars movie without the nostalgia play right the reaction is sort of like but that's kind of why they need to make one of these movies that doesn't handshake anything else yeah sure that's true on a basic narrative level it can handshake in those little moments you know a gritty courtroom drama you know i just want them

to keep things moving in this universe. I want them to transfer the story to new places. You want to make the creative process easier for everyone? Yeah, I would like to make the creative process easier for everybody. Well, WeTransfer, who are good friends of Bank Check. Also Mario and Luigi. Both friends of the show. Right, and friends of WeTransfer.

They are all about making the creative process easier for everyone they built their site that'd be the simplest way to share big files around the world for free yeah you know send it over uh i i don't know some fan art some slash fic sure maybe some death star plans yeah oh good. Rogue One would have been a one-reeler if they had WeTransfer. If they had WeTransfer because there's no sign-in, there's no offer codes,

no password to forget. You just upload and you send and you get back to making your trench run. That whole movie could have been covered in the length of a Mobisode. 40 million people use WeTransfer. Good number. Some of them receive files every month.

And since day one, I told you about this, but it's important. They devoted 30% of their ad space to showcasing creative people from around the world. And important to note, none of this day two nonsense where people finally, they do one day being really dirty

and inhumane and then they finally get wise. Day one, baby. Musicians, photographers, illustrators, podcasters! And in the spirit of that, we're going to skip the rest of the 60 second ad and get back to the pod. Right. Something more important, such as a merchandise spotlight. That's wetransfer.com.

Wetransfer.com. You make wetransfer. Here is a very offbeat merchandise spotlight. This is unlike any merchandise spotlight I have ever done before. Okay. The year is 1986. That was the year of spotlight I have ever done before. Okay. The year is 1986. That was the year of my birth. Humble birth.

Yeah. Star Wars seems dead. Sure. In six years? No, no. Three years since Return of the Jedi. Right.

I think both the cartoon shows have been canceled at this point. Ewoks and droids. Kenner still has the Star Wars license which has been beyond a financial windfall for them right cash cow but now it's starting to peter out they're getting down to real right because

they're out of new characters characters right there's no new media to support it uh there'd never been a merchandising line that ran this long off of films you know yeah um and george lucas you know there was that vague notion of oh maybe, maybe someday he's going to make more. Maybe he's going to make the prequels. But it seemed kind of dead. Yeah. Kenner pitched to George Lucas a new plot line. This is going to pay off.

That they wrote. Okay. They said. Like, right. We've run out of characters, so. Unfathomable in this day and age that like in an era where brands and franchises are managed so closely yeah that the toy company would be like what if you just let us write new star wars yeah we wouldn't be putting out new material we wouldn't have a cartoon show

we wouldn't have comics we just write a new storyline and make toys off of that storyline which is the adventures of han and leia and luke so what's the new storyline? The storyline was like, the epic continues, was the name of the line, Ben's clenched fist. The plot concerned the genetics master, Athaprime, ruler of Dark World, who had been freed from Exile following the death of Emperor Palpatine,

striking at the Rebel Alliance, was forced to do battle with Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, and the Mongo Beefhead Trimesman. Meanwhile, Gramov Tarkin, who had evaded death at the Battle of Yavin, had returned to take control of the Galactic Empire. They didn't have a lot of money to put this together, so they literally took pieces from other Star Wars

toys, and like the Hammerhead alien... I'm looking at the Mongo Beefhead right now. This is what I'm talking about. The Mongo Beefhead, they took the Hammerhead alien and they literally turned his head upside down and were like, put it on a different body. And we're like, this is a new character. And they painted Luke and Han different characters.

But the big notion from this was they had been making all the ships from the movie, right? And they were really expensive and parents had bought all of them. And they were like, we're not going to buy any more of the big ticket items. I think the last couple ones they did didn't sell as well. So they said, rather than selling all new ships, we're going to sell attachments onto ships. So their big idea was an escape pod for the Millennium Falcon that fit in between the prongs at the front of the ship. It has a little forky prong at the front.

It's got that little forky prong, and it made the Millennium Falcon come to a point, and that was supposed to be, oh, these are cheaper, like $5 little add-on vehicles. You snap this onto something else. Right right and no one has acknowledged this but i have to believe that this movie is doing that as a conscious nod to some of the nerdiest that's like star wars that's right that's like level six deep but the younger kasdan is a hardcore star wars he apparently pushed really hard for uh inclusion of darth maul who we have not yet talked about.

He worked into the background some characters from the Dark Horse comics and allusions to things like that. He's really into all the ephemera. Dave Gonzalez and I were talking about this. Aurra Sing is mentioned. We've talked about Aurra Sing. Where Beckett is said to have killed her. Which apparently has set off some

fury in the deep Star Wars nerd world where they're like, that character is too important to just kill her off screen. Because people love Arsene who, for reminders. She's the white person with the, like literally white skin with the orange ponytail. And like a needle through her head and she appears in one shot of the pod race. Yes, she's in the pod race for a second and doesn't do anything. But people love her. She like takes a pot shot at someone. Yeah. but there's a right there's a whole expanded world

yes right but i just found that very interesting because while not making it canonical they're trying to tie in like now even rejected star wars plot lines at least with the tip of the hat that's a little interesting no i found that found that interesting. Yeah, totally. I was, I, I love weird shit like that. Yeah. Thank you. Weird shit.

I'm looking at the like remodeled millennium Falcon. I don't like it as much. Like I'm glad they cut the escape pod quickly. Right? Yeah. Yeah. But it's cool. Yeah,

that's fine. Yeah. Good chip. It's a little like the, the rub it and lost in Space where he's really shiny and then once they like crack it open and then it looks like

the classic thing you know you know totally you know you know how do you know made her well

I tried watching tried watching the Netflix one but I couldn't get into it yeah Lost in Space couldn't get into it you sound like

American movie goers in the beginning of september 2017 because it was sold out across the nation ben's covering his couldn't get into it i've developed a headache over the recording people who don't have fandango couldn't get into it honestly man this is not like last jedi where we were like two hours and 40 minutes in and then like suddenly realized like shit we didn't talk about this. We're done. We're basically done. I think we should talk for a few more minutes. Have some camp and then get out.

I don't know. How are you doing? I'm doing alright. I'm tired. Yeah, Darth Maul's in the movie. I think that's... I appreciate that Kasdan likes these, but that's a baffling decision. I feel like he wants to bring Darth Maul because Darth Maul got brought back in the

cartoons years ago right they they pulled that trick his clone wars arc is good he's got like robo legs sure right and in rebels i believe rebels closed the darth maul thing where obi-wan kills him like as an old man and so like this takes place in between the problem arc that they've already finished that's what i'm saying the problem with bringing him into the movies is people will literally not know when this movie is taking place right which i confess i do not know yeah like and they'll just be like wasn't he dead like i just think a lot of audience members are going to be baffled i also just think this is the thing i i feel frustrated by is i think what's interesting about star wars isn't what's

interesting about the mcu better or worse, which is the puzzle piecing of all these things together. I think what's interesting about Star Wars is that universe as a place for a type of story or types of stories. I'm not really interested in filling in gaps in between things.

According to Wikipedia, this takes place 10 BBY. So essentially 10 years before the original Star Wars movie. So there you go. Okay. I guess that makes sense. Because I think Han here is supposed to be about 22. Like he's in his very early 20s.

Right. He's about 10 years younger, a foot shorter. He had a late growth spurt. Maybe Corellians grow late. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. It's like a gentleman's five for me

I think I can give it a six I like the look enough do you think you will ever watch it again? I think if it goes up on Netflix I will watch certain scenes of it again or just like keep it on when I'm trying to fall asleep because I like the look of it it's one of those things where like I've seen Force Awakens like

20 times maybe not 20 10 times like I've seen Force Awakens like 20 times. Maybe not 20. 10 times. Sure. Like I've watched that movie a lot. Yeah, me too. Rogue One, I have watched once since the two times I saw it in theaters. Tried to watch it again, so then like if I watch it again. I watched like half of it on Netflix.

Yeah. Yeah. And I felt the same. I had a good time, but I was. We Last Jedi and Force Awakens, I watch them frequently. Sure. I feel like you don't watch them enough You should watch them more Get off my back

I'm busy What are you so busy with? Making a TV show, no one should do it It is weird to me though I feel like the strain of This whole like Oh we're reconceptualizing the whole movie We're reshooting it

How it has to fit into this larger tapestry. We've gotten to a point where the pipeline for movies being made because they're so franchise-based is so much closer to how TV used to be made, where it's so much about trying stuff out and then course-correcting and then undoing and then shaking it up and all of that.

While on the opposite side, now the expectation is that TV has to be very cinematic and very tight and very like all mapped out. Like, uh, you know, I don't know. I, I'm not saying this is, I don't think I'm saying anything I shouldn't be saying right now, but it's like, there is that weird thing where it's like, we're, we're making the tick right now. Right. We're like halfway through the season. tick right now, right? We're like halfway through the season. This next season, when it comes out, is going to be released in one chunk as opposed to the split season thing we did last time. So it'll be like 10 episodes

all at once. And now there's an expectation where people watch things often like I'm going to sit down and try to watch this as one narrative. Both parts of the tick I watched in one go. Right. But it's like we're swishing directors up all the times like different people are coming in with different notions of it and scripts are being rewritten

constantly right and i'm not like asking people to judge things on a curve but it is like i was talking to some other actors on set and i was like it is kind of stressful the way that people watch and process tv has changed. Yes, that's true. Because they now want everything to fit together so perfectly. And TV is a little more improvisational as a process because it's a constantly moving train with multiple stops, not something where you start out knowing everything you're going to do. Sure.

And it's very collaborative. I don't know, but that's like what this movie feels like to me. You know, that's how, like the MCU, I mean,

I think the reason why the Russo brothers are working so well in the Marvel system is because they're showrunners. But they're done now. Yeah.

Yeah. Should we talk about Infinity War? I don't think it's very good. I think it feels like TV. It feels like

a middle episode of a show that I gave up on watching. Can I give you my hot take on Infinity War? Which I liked. I didn't hate it, but I sat there and I very, very seldomly felt invested in any way.

I felt very invested, which is sort of part of my hot take. I only felt invested when Vision died, which sucks. Spoilers, Vision dies. He's my best friend. Well, that's actually the core part of my hot take. Okay. But basically, what I like about the movie, and to be clear,

I dislike Civil War. I know you do. That's probably my least favorite of the Marvel movies, apart from Iron Man 2 and Hulk. I greatly prefer it to this. I don't think it's a very good movie. I don't even like Winter Soldier that much. I think Winter Soldier is fine. I think Winter Soldier

is okay because the action is smaller and a little better apart from the helicopter ship. But no, I like this movie because I think it has a little more of an idea that is actually blended into the movie whereas Civil War I think the idea is like total bullshit.

Because in Civil War you are allowed to side with everyone. Right, which I think is the biggest problem with Civil War. Like, because in civil war, you are allowed to side with everyone. Right. Which I think is the biggest problem. Civil war in civil war. Everyone has a good reason for doing what they're doing. And everyone's going to have a good reason to forgive themselves. They don't want to make you dislike anybody. Exactly.

Like you can just side with everyone in it and there's just no tension to the, to the civil war, you know, but I just, even the, the, the airport fight, which is fun.

They're never really mad at each other. They're just kind of bashing each other for a while. Yeah. You know, and in even the the airport fight which is fun they're never really mad at each other they're just kind of bashing each other for a while yeah you know and in this the movie to me the pitch of that of infinity war is like thanos arrives and he's like enough of this there's too many of you yeah this is ridiculous like i am here to like cut this shit out because it's too much yeah this is bloated like that's his like philosophical idea and the avengers are responding with like no we like it like it's good we're friends this is a family and what i love about the movie is the thing that i feel some people brought up which is like everyone's like why don't you just kill vision i mean yeah you know you lose vision but

then thanos doesn't win right it's because they like him too much well and like the metaphor the the entire state we lose vision then we lose we the entire stakes of the last battle are like we just need to make sure vision doesn't die and that's why i like the movie because those are real stakes and thanos is coming for and they could just kill vision and then thanos loses okay so and the whole we don't trade life for life stuff uh-huh and that's why i'm into it at the end there because i feel it when vision dies i feel bad i feel vision's death yeah i half feel gamora's death me too i do i mean i think that might i can't tell if that's permanent but feels like it might be retconned maybe um if it's gonna be retconned it's gonna be someone's gonna have to die i'll say this too I don't buy for a millisecond that Thanos

loves her I think it's a decent set up as a sort of emotional threat within a scene you're saying they don't do enough to sort of

cement that relationship with the like flashbacks and stuff I don't think she fights better than Nebula no it's more like like that he's not like just an elemental force

like a galactus like yeah when he arrives in the planet it's all happening off screen for him like he doesn't actually kill people other people kill people but that's and this girl approaches him and he's like i like you you know what i mean like he's still a person a little tiny bit of a person but this feels to me like they're trying to use the gamora relationship the father-daughter relationship to replace the death relationship in terms of giving him an emotional grounding and i prefer the death stuff i i like the death stuff but i i now know why they didn't do that and make sense to me but like i love the death stuff in the you're saying you know in that you feel like you figured out or someone gave you some scoop no i'm saying the

stakes i'm explaining to you make more sense to me within like thanos entering these this movie universe yeah because in the comics thanos's motivation is just like that he's crazy i mean like he's the mad titan there's literally one person who's ever been nice to him sure that person is death and she asks him to prove himself by killing everyone. And that's fine. It's nuts. When I read interviews with Marcus and McFeely or whatever their names are, the writer, and they said, we just felt like that was too crazy to set up in one movie.

I go, if we're at Infinity War and we're deciding that things are too crazy to pull off, I don't know what the point of this entire franchise is. I disagree with you. I think there are other arguments for them to not use that as a plot line, but if that's the argument of like, we can't have a physical manifestation of death,

it's like, then what are we doing here if we can't have that? I just think they could not find an emotional grounding for that plot. I think that's the grounding. I think the grounding is that that's the only person who's ever been nice to him. And you also have Cate Blanchett do it. No, I don't think that's good. I think because then that's all happening. Like what I like is Thanos is entering and saying to the audience,

like, this is enough with this. This is too much. Like, and I'm going to equal the scales here. I'm going to cut the chaff out. I'm going to cut everything in half, essentially, right? And the audience is like, no, we like that. And then when they all puff into smoke, it's not that everyone knows they're not dead forever,

but it's that you're sad. And the movie's like, you like them. Didn't feel sad. Couldn't feel less sad. The only one that had any emotional impact on me was Spidey just because Tom Holland killed that moment. He's so great. He's a really fucking good actor.

Yes. I will say my biggest problem with the film is what you said. Thanos comes in and he cuts everything in half, including the story, which is not a full story. It feels like the movie is stalling for time. It feels like this sort of, Oh,

everyone's siphoned off into these small groups because of course you can't have everyone on set at the same time. It's a scheduling impossibility. Well, it feels like you have a lot of groups just sort of waiting around going like, okay, Thanos, he's going to be getting here.

He comes in, they put up a fight, you know, they're going to lose. He waiting around going like, okay, Thanos, he's going to be getting here. He comes in. They put up a fight. You know they're going to lose. He doesn't kill them, but they just don't succeed. Thanos never kills anyone. But I'm saying all those showdowns feel kind of just like stalling for me to get to this end point

and then the end point feels like a midpoint. Well, yeah. He kills Loki. He kills Gamora. He kills Vision. There are three deaths that actually feel like of some consequence in terms of him getting his hands dirty. And then people puff into smoke. Yeah, that's cool. I don't know.

I mean, that's what he does in the comic. I mean, they puff into smoke there too. I like the setup of what you're saying. If the movie was able to, within one film, It worked on me. resolve itself by successfully putting up a rebuttal against that point which is the avengers finding a way to through their love for lack of a better term here bear power right you know well maybe i mean i assumed the

next movie i mean i think the next movie is basically one last ride with the original crew because the original crew are the only ones left. But this movie feels to me like three hours of Popeye winding up his punch. I love it. I didn't love it, but I liked it. And I saw it with two audiences. I saw it twice and both of the audiences were so into it. And I mean Solo.

Our audience was not super into it. They laughed at some Lando shit. Chuckles. Sort of a smattering of applause. When Darth Maul came in, everyone just seemed kind of confused. Bit of a murmur, perhaps. That's the most I could give it. No Maul rats in our crowd.

I'm trying to think of like one. I pitched that joke to Alex Ross Perry over text today, and he was like, you should use it on the podcast. How's Alex? He saw it at like the same time as us, but we didn't see it. Yeah, I think he liked it more than us. He also likes Last Jedi less than us. Oh, he's all wrong.

Alex, listen to me, Alex. Alex. Last Jedi's good. Alex, how's it going? Hey, Alex. How you doing? How you doing? Looking forward to your new movie.

Yeah. Christopher Robin trailer dropped today. Yeah. I don't know if blankies know that that movie's written by... Alex Ross Perry. Yeah. It looks delightful. I'm very into it.

Uh, and if I was not very into it, I would not talk about it. Hey, you know, that's, that's my policy. Yeah.

Oh, is this a new segment on the show where we just address Alex? I like that. Yeah. Uh, you emailed, uh, us,

uh, uh, like, uh, end to, uh, Tully Tully oh yeah that was funny that was really funny

and I totally got lost in email and didn't respond no well he sent it I'm thinking only I had seen Tully when he sent it I didn't open it because I thought it would

contain Tully spoilers because I knew Tully had a twist it sort of had it didn't really have Tully spoilers but he wrote it up in final draft

as if it was the real script page like when I was first reading it I was like wait is this just from Tully? I had just seen it. But the bit, and this is not a spoiler, is at the end of Tully, Ron Livingston

and Shirley Theron each split an earbud and listen to something together off of an iPod or an iPhone. And the bit that Alex wrote was that they were listening to the listing of Ben's nicknames. Which would be a funny ending. That's super funny, and I'm sorry, but I didn't say anything.

People didn't reply to it. I think Alex was... You should just email him some comedy points. Use WeTransfer, email him some comedy points. He'll be fine. It'll take very little time. Box office. I just want to talk about it for a second.

It'll make like 120, 130, right? It posted 14 in Thursday previews, which is a record. It's more than at World's End made. Memorial Day, apparently, not a good weekend. Not a huge one. Because at World's End still has the record.

Yeah. And... But I think it's because now the first week of May has become so big that people stay away. You know? I mean, so...

This is interesting. So now disney was projecting 130 essentially yeah um now people are saying it's gonna be more like 115 that will not be good no that will not be good that will be seen i think it's a bit of a disappointment because then that movie probably ends up around 250 or something which is not good well that would be a terrible multiplier but i guess it could happen. I mean, the thing people are pointing out is Justice League kind of opened with a similar preview and then tanked.

I mean, people did not like Justice League. Yeah. And what else? We got Deadpool 2. Have you seen it? He's seen you. He's seen me. I guess. I don't know. Have you seen it? Deadpool 2? No, I haven't, but he emailed me to say that I guess. I don't know. Yeah. Have you seen it? Deadpool 2? No, I haven't, but he emailed me to say

that I haven't seen his movie yet. Were you just racking your brains for... I was trying to think I'd become a clever version. Book Club? Have you seen Book Club? No, I'm waiting to see it with Romley. Yeah.

That's her fucking Infinity War. Yeah, it really is. That is the most ambitious crossover event in history for Rom. Can I tell you Todd's line that really is so good? Yeah. More of an afternoon than a movie so good when he said that i was like shit that's so fucking smart he's gonna

win the pulitzer this year uh infinity war which is making a lot of money uh still in the top five it's interesting that infinity war and and Black Panther kind of have inverse relationships, domestic and foreign. Infinity War is already way past Black Panther worldwide. Yes. But not domestically. It probably won't pass it domestically. It won't.

Although it's going to come closer than I thought it would. I think it'll end up at five or six. It's at six. Yeah. It's at 603 right now. I think it'll go way, it'll go like 650 maybe. Maybe not. Yeah.

Somewhere there. I'm at five or six in the all go like 650 maybe. Maybe not. Yeah. Somewhere there. I'm at five or six in the all-time chart. Oh, yeah. Oh, sure. Because worldwide it's number three of all-time I think now.

It's a very popular movie worldwide. Yeah, and it's half a movie. Life of the Party. Melissa McCarthy. Yeah. I'm sure they had a nice time making that one.

You know, she has some interesting movies coming up this year. Thank God year I think Can You Ever Forgive Me looks great looks cool so into that did you see A Quiet Place?

now I'm just because you haven't been seeing a lot of movies no I haven't you're found busy well don't you go to the diaper theater? you done? I saw A Quiet Place oh you did?

did you like it? yes it was great ask me if I liked it did you like it? yes you saw it? yeah I liked it I saw the diaper theater there Yes. You saw it? Yeah, I liked it.

I saw it at the Diaper Theater. There's a Diaper Theater in the Bronx near where we filmed. Did you see Overboard at the Diaper Theater? I didn't. Show Dogs? And I used to be on A Ferris Completist. Yeah. People kind of like that one.

I'm not going to see Show Dogs now that they've cut out. I don't even want to finish that show. Anyone who wants to know about that, Google it. We're not going to talk about it. I'm not going to finish the rest of that i feel pretty you didn't see you did see rampage i saw rampage i think we were on the same page on that one great monsters uh we we need to start talking about duane keeping him in check some trouble that ego is getting a little out of control movie literally flips you off uh black panther

movie still in still in did you see Tully I did see Tully uh huh I think it's weird I like Tully I think there are two movies there and I like both of them a lot and I think putting them together

is a little bit I largely agree with that right yeah do you see Mouth Spit Sex no that's my top movie to see I still haven't seen that Disobedience

what have I seen my favorite movie of the year is You Were Never Really Here I've seen that twice oh yeah you were into You Were Never Really Here I still love really that's a great movie good then i took a cab and talked about how great it was i think that movie's a masterpiece when did you take this cab after we got drinks okay rose boys oh yeah the bros days yeah we that's a great movie we all went out to dinner and all had steak and bros we did we all we went to dinner griffin orders first because we saw bruce mcleod together and

i ordered like a beer and a hamburger and you get a burger and and then ben and david both ordered rosé and steak i'll get steak frites right and rosé and i was like same thing you know what i want that too and the waitress walks away and i pulled her back and griffin's like i watch him for five seconds going and he's like like, actually, actually, actually, excuse me, excuse me. He has to really bring her back. And you were like, Griff, I know you like bits, but it's fine. Order what you want to order. And she's like entering the order into the computer thing.

She's typing it in. It was a race against time, but then we became the Brose boys. We were the Brose steak freak boys. And yeah, you're never really here, which was a divisive movie, but we seem to be all into it. Yeah, it's all masterpiece. Have you seen First Reformed yet? No, I haven't seen First Reformed.

I haven't seen Disobedience. I'm sure everyone is on the edge of their seat listening to what movies are on my to-see list. Are you kidding me? They are. I know. You should see the Claire Denis movie. Let the Sunshine in. I really recommend that.

Oh, you saw it? Okay. Yes. I don't know. I have seen that. Did you like it? Yes, it's lovely. It's a great movie.

Julia Pinoche is one of her finest. Did you see The Rider? I did. That's great. Yeah, I liked it less than everyone else seems to, but I liked it a lot. Did you see Death of Stalin? I did. Not into it?

It's too long. You're too long. That's a movie where I can't figure out if it's more or less funny because of our current political climate. I think it's more. But everything is less, if that makes sense yeah right yeah it had its moments so i thought it was good how long is this episode uh two hours two yeah two hours well you your your clocks is 215 but we talked for a while before we started so let's get out of here no we're done let's do the castle run five parsecs let's get out of the episode 12, we're done. Let's do the Kessel Run. Five parsecs. We'll get out of the episode. Twelve parsecs. Twelve parsecs.

If you round down. Cool. All right. I feel like we're sort of just gliding in at this point. You know, the engine's out of gas, but we're just like, it's like Dunkirk.

Yeah. Yeah, it is. We're Tom Hardy. We're taking off our mask. We're showing our beautiful lips. Yeah, you're going to have a little break. We're going to go back to Bird.

We got Ratatouille next week talking to with rom and joe the siblings we united the siblings we united the siblings uh it's actually in my memory a great episode yeah who knows i remember it being fun who knows i thought ian giant was the worst one and then we won another ob for that episode. So who not? They held the Obies like off season. I know. They had a special Obie ceremony. An impromptu Obie. An emergency Obie.

An emergency Obie. Oh boy. But yeah, I mean, yeah, have fun with the rest of Brad Bird. The miniseries after that, which we haven't announced,

but is mostly done. Yep. We'll be back doing topical episodes when, what's the next thing? Oh, Incredibles 2!

In essentially a month, we're going to record incredibles 2 my most that's uh not only my most anticipated movie this summer but probably the most excited i've been for a summer movie in years i am very excited i'm sort of in that phase where i'm like i just don't want to think about it too much because i really don't want to let me down like i'm just like i'm sure it'll be good i'm trying i'm mostly ignoring the promotional uh material every time i even see a poster up i I'm like, fuck, I want to hang out with that family. As far as Pixar sequels go, I mean, Toy Story 2, you obviously, it's your favorite movie. T.S.Y., yeah.

Is there another sequel that stands out that's really outstanding? Within the Pixar canon? Yeah, or is this going to kind of, do you think this has a running to take its place up there? I think it has a very easy runway to being the second best Pixar sequel ever. Nice. I don't know if you know this, but... What if I think it's the best sequel

ever? Pixar sequel. That's insanity. You'll kill guys. No, no, I mean, look. You'll get upset. If that is the case, then I'm very excited to see the greatest movie ever made. But I'll say, you know, I mean, look. If that is the case, then I'm very excited to see the greatest movie ever made. But I'll say, I don't know if you guys know this,

but Cars 2 makes Cars 3 look like Cars 1. So that's sort of my stance on Pixar's sequel. I guess we should go. You teed me up. You didn't even know you were doing it,

but how am I not going to make that joke if you ask me what my stance is on Pixar sequels? Everyone listening to this episode was like, make the Cars joke again.

Make the Cars joke again. And then he did it. And I'll say this. I mean, reaffirmed after seeing Solo as I hit my papers against the desk and that's all the news

fit to print. Reaffirmed after watching Solo, I genuinely contend, low bar, faint praise, Monsters University is the best prequel ever made. I would have to think about it.

I think the only thing I could even argue is better is Godfather Part 2, which is only half a prequel. I was about to say that's sort of a prequel. I'm trying to think of prequels. I don't think it fully counts. I think Monsters University is the best one. So I think my hope is that Incredibles 2 is better than Monsters University which I think is pretty solid and is amazing at the end. Last 30 minutes rule.

I like I like Prometheus. Yeah I know you do. It's a good prequel. I know you do. I like the the new Planet of the Apes movies but those aren't really prequels.

They're quasi prequels. They're kind of side prequels. And obviously Scorpion This is a rough list. Scorpion King 3 Rise to Power. This is a rough list I'm looking at right now.

Right? Yeah. I think Finding Dory is good. You know, I would like Incredibles 2 to be, you know,

a full stop, like, proper important movie. I want it to be important. Fox and the Hound 2? Oh, that sucks. That thing's a piece of shit. I don't know.

Reba McEntire? That's a piece of shit. Ben just handed David a post-it note. What does it say? Oh, thank you to Audio Boom and RX Bar and WeTransfer for sponsoring the episode. Yeah, thank you RX Bar once again for preventing me from having diarrhea on set.

Thank you all very much for listening. I'm sure they're thrilled. Please remember to rate, review, subscribe. That's a celebrity endorsement. What if that was like Clooney? He's like the finest RX bar. No diarrhea tonight.

You know, I'm trying to transition into being RX bars on camera. Spokesperson. You genuinely love RX bars. If RX bar is listening. Hey, he talks about him a lot. Seriously.

I'll, I'll say this rx bar if you're listening if you want to send me some more free rx bars i'll keep talking about them any chance i get i'd like i'll tweet about them i'll do whatever if rx bar continue to sponsor this don't send them to david because i want to have the upper hand yeah ben just walked out of the studio then walked back in to ask if we had ended. Please remember to rate, review, subscribe. Thank you for listening. Thanks to Joe Bowen. Whoa, my God! What? Oh, my God. This is amazing.

What a move. You executed this? Oh, Ben is dancing. Oh, my God. Someone just walked in the studio. Get on mic. Hey, blankies. Joe Bowen here.

It's Joe Bowen. We had heard rumor. We had heard legend. That's the only reason you were excited for us to wrap things up then is you just wanted us to get to the thank yous

how long how long have you been waiting outside Joe oh less than a minute thank god because we just did a bunch of horseshit yeah

I was afraid you were going to say like since you started recording the Incredibles episode no then he would be dead he would be a skeleton he would have killed himself He would be a skeleton.

He would have killed himself. Yep. As all our listeners apparently did. A seppuku. Yeah, the most controversial thing we've ever done. I just can't believe that's the thing that breaks the camel's back. I can believe it. Whatever, I don't know.

I don't know why anyone does anything. Thank you to Lane Montgomery for our theme song. Thank you to Andrew Guto for our social media. Go to BlankiesAtRed.com for some real nerdy shit. Tune in next week for Talkin' Tooey. Yep. Yep. And as always,

Cars 3 makes cars. God damn it! Cars 2 makes... I don't know, whatever. You can't even do it now. Turn it off. It's the opposite. That's where I was.

Fuck up. Cars 2 makes Cars 3 look like Cars 4. Correct. Okay, bye. Roland. Roland? James? James?

James Brolin. James Brolin? We're Brolin right now?'re rolling we're a couple bros we were rolling down the street i'm i'm loud i'm i'm i'm hot it's not crisp i'll fix your they're just a little loud that's all can we do i heard a podcast about you i was wondering if it's true and then everything they've podcasted about me is true. Sure. I heard a... I can't do him. Do you want to do him or Lando?

You can do either one. You do Lando. Okay. You do the thing. I heard a story about... I mean, just go, whatever. I heard a story. But you know what I mean?

He has that weird sort of like... Do that. That sounds good. That's not bad. It's not good. It's too nerdy. It's not bad. It's not bad.

I heard a podcast about you, and I was wondering if it's true. Are you off book? I'm off book. Okay.