Blank Check with Griffin & David - Two Friends

Episode Date: January 9, 2022

We’re kicking off our Jane Campion miniseries with her feature-length debut, auspiciously titled “Two Friends” - perhaps she has a competitive advantage? The backwards-structured script (the OG temporal pincer movement) leads the crew to reflect on their own adolescence…did you know David was already six feet tall at the age of twelve? And Ben was rocking size twelve shoes in middle school? Griffin may get a singular chest hair in 2022? Come for our Campion-filmography table setting, stay for a surprising amount of Simpsons discussion. Join our Patreon at patreon.com/blankcheck Follow us @blankcheckpod on Twitter and Instagram! Buy some real nerdy merch at shopblankcheckpod.myshopify.com

The first feature film by the Oscar-winning director of the podcast Yano. Okay, so I'm going to explain what just happened. Okay, go ahead. This movie has no quotes page? No. And that is the tagline on the DVD? Yes, on the release later in her career DVD. The Milestone Collection DVD.

Is that how you watch this? Yes, I bought the DVD. You bought the DVD? Mm-hmm. It's on the Criterion. I know that. Oh, it is? It is.

Couldn't have checked in with us, Ben. I would have told you. I'm sorry. No, it's okay. I like doing it myself. I like doing it wrong. It's on the Criterion channel along with her three short films

made prior to this. Have you seen those, David? No, and shit, I've meant to watch them. Well, maybe you can call me Mr. Homework this week because I did and I win. You do. You're the winner. I win. I'd like to talk about the short films a little bit. Oh, no, we should definitely talk about the short films.

Leading into this, but you should watch them. They're also, I think, on the Sweetie release. Okay. Just telling you. Okay, what are we talking about? What are we talking about? We're talking about the Oscar-winning director of the podcast, Yano. This is what I'm talking about. Front-loaded, okay? Yeah.

Because it's a new miniseries. Wait. Is that a train I hear in the distance? Hold on one second. I think it's getting closer. Kaz Branagh is slowly taking off his cap, looking off to the horizon. Right?

James Darcy is like, what is it, sir? And he goes, a new podcast, miniseries. Yeah. Yeah. That's what he says. Kenny B. Jane Campion. Oh!

One of your favorite directors david i feel like someone you've been really wanting to cover for a very long time i guess so we have our personal picks always that we're always sort of pushing for sure she was she's a fave of mine she was on my bracket last year yeah you've mentioned david that you had a very influential class while whileston university right where you took a was it just specifically new zealand film that's correct okay You had a very influential class whilst in university, right? Where you took a... Was it just specifically New Zealand film? That's correct.

Okay. Because you also had an Australian film class. Did you not? No. No? Just New Zealand. Why did I think you had like an Osploitation class? I don't know.

I do like those movies. I'm very wrong. I'm very wrong. No, I took... I did... Well, you know what? Set up the show and then we can talk about the class I took in college. It's embarrassing to get something that wrong, David, because took, I did, well, you know what, set up the show and then we can talk about the class I took in college. It's embarrassing

to get something that wrong, David, because you and I are, of course, the two friends. Yeah. That is our name. It is our competitive

advantage. On this here podcast called Blank Check with Griffin and David, I'm Griffin. Thank you. I'm David. And it's a podcast

about filmographies, directors who have massive success early on in their careers and are given a series of blank checks to make whatever crazy passion projects they want. Sometimes those checks clear and sometimes they bounce. Baby!

Mm-hmm. And this is a Jane Campion series. Yes. That we are calling, I will repeat for clarity, The Podcastiano. The Podcastiano. That's how I have it in my head. It looks funny.

It looks like you kind of do a little wrist. Get a little wrist in there. The podcastiano. Evolution of how we say it out loud. Who knows? Right. But this was the first time, David, where you, in fact, said,

we have to go with the sweatiest option. I threw out a bunch of options, and you said, it's got to be the podcast, yeah, no? I liked how it sounded. I thought it was fun. I thought it was fun and cool. And I even was like, we could do the podcast, no? And you were like, no, it has to be I-A-N-O.

It has to have I-A-N-O in it. Podcast, yeah, no. It sounds like a computer voice malfunction. Podcast, yeah, no. Look, I don't know. Yeah, we could have done like Holy Podcast or the podcast of a lady, you know, whatever. We could have phoned it in, but not for Janie.

I pitched a pod trick of a castee. Yeah, I hated that. Yeah, you really hated that. You got angry and you threatened me with physical violence. I did. I said, if you fucking say those words to me again.

It was intense. Yeah. Look, among the many reasons we wanted to cover her was the fact that what is, you know,

considered by most to be her first feature film is in fact titled Two Friends. The Two Friends! It's actually called Two Friends. The Two Friends! It's actually called Two Friends. The definite article

is still ours. Yeah, that belongs to us. Right. But yes, Two Friends. This was a TV movie. So there was some deliberation I feel about

whether or not this was going to count or be a Patreon thing or whatever, but it played at the Cannes Film Festival. It's a proper movie. And also,

Angel at My Table also was created as a TV movie and we're obviously going to count that. Yeah, that was... Or was that created as like a mini-series or something? Because it's long. No, I guess it was a movie. I don't know. Anyway. I don't know how these

New Zealand TV movies work. But this is where we're starting. Crazy. Two Friends. Two Friends. Yeah. Jane Campion's first movie. Take us back. Take us back Take us back To the start Yeah

To where it all started Okay it all started In Wellington New Zealand Alright Which is I want to say that You know what I'm going to look it up

It's the capital Yeah Of New Zealand It's the biggest city I think And that was like Auckland might be Also the main hub Of all the

Jackson productions Right Am I wrong in thinking that check this now that weta's in wellington and that almost certainly it's the capital it's the big city yeah um saying it becomes a surprising uh hub of of film production okay auckland is the largest city in new Zealand. Wellington is the capital of New Zealand. They are both, of course, on the North Island, which I think is the more populated of the two big islands.

And Weta is based in Wellington. Thank you. But yes, New Zealand, of course, is this wonderful country that has a lot of really dramatic landscapes. It's actually really cool to make movies there because you've got a lot of options available to you blah blah blah but i'm skipping ahead i did study new zealand cinema in college mostly so i could hang out with a girl i had a crush on who was named mark the time there you go bleep that out you always forget you love bleeping out the name of the person.

She has a new name now. She got married. She shed that name. But still. I just feel like every time you have an opportunity to invoke her, you do usually. It's only when I talk about New Zealand cinema. No, I know. I know. But I feel like you usually do it for the enjoyment of our guest. And we have no guest this week.

And yet still, once again, you want to do the bit of saying her name and then bleeping it out I also want to shout out my professor Bruce fuck I need to look his name up what was his name

Bruce Willis hey this is my class on New Zealand films or something whatever i get paid one million dollars a class did you see that clip i don't stand up see the clip of the action movie yeah yeah where he like turns from day to night in the middle of him walking yeah it's incredible it is but that's like a clear indication of like he um like you only get him for a day right and they were like shit we need to finish this shot and he's not here right it turns to night

on the other guys coverage and then as the action starts it's clearly a stunt double for Bruce like they got like three shots of Bruce I want to shout out Bruce Babington that was his name okay my professor of film at Newcastle University I was an english major but

you have to believe that um but he did teach a film a course in new zealand cinema which included the works of jane campion as well as like jeff murphy you know roger donalds and lee tamahori you know a lot of a lot of the names you think of peter jackson obviously but was that it is a surprisingly robust film industry for what is a small country in terms of population was that your activation point as a campion fan because i feel like both you and i as oscar nerds i'm sure had the name jane campion rattling around our heads for years before we were really engaging with her work because it's like oh fuck she's like one of the only women nominated for an oscar female director nominees and at the time she was like the only one who was still presently working.

Right. She was the only female filmmaker who could release movies that said from nominated director Jenkins. I saw In the Cut I believe in theaters. Okay. I did not. I saw that and that may have been, I just don't remember when I saw The Piano. I think I

may have seen The Piano before then on video or whatever. So I'd seen those before then on video or whatever so i'd seen those two movies i don't think i'd seen any other campion before i took this class i still to this day have only seen three of her films i'm excited to watch a lot of these for the first time it's gonna be great yeah i've seen everything that she's made but holy smoke i do not remember it okay um but she's a yeah so i'm a huge fan of hers but let's talk about Jane Campion who of course the part of the reason we're covering her is she's got her first movie out in many years hopefully it's sweeping Oscar season or at least generating some buzz look I think we felt like this is a win

win situation either she's winning Oscars and and such right now and this feels like a victory lap or she's getting snubbed, and people are going to be outraged about it and demand more acclaim. But either way, people are talking about her again. She was born in 1954 in Wellington, New Jersey. New Jersey? New Zealand? Huh?

Not New Jersey. David. I've been watching too much Sopranos. Also, we should say that we spent an hour before this episode doing some hardcore spreadsheeting. Yeah, I'm a little zonked from that probably. It's the most strenuous physical activity David ever engages with. Yeah.

April 30th, isn't she Aries? No, she's a Taurus like me. She's a Taurus like me. So we're very similar. Okay. Her dad... David recently made a joke, by the way, that the cause of stress in his life

is that both me and his daughter are water signs. And Hosley. Three water signs. That the three of us, that he got fucking shackled to these three fucking difficult emotional water signs. And it's the two of us and a baby. He's putting us in a pot together

Yeah My baby is a Pisces She was born in Wellington, New Zealand 1954 What are you? You're a Cancer? Cancer Yeah

I got my eye on you Alright Well You know I have the exact same Sun rising and moon sign As Wes Anderson David Or a Scorpio Scorpio that's pretty quirky if you

pretty quirky that's pretty fucking put my put my deets into some database how comes wes anderson yeah all right but it's a it's a manual database yeah of course it's very ornate all right her dad uh was an opera and she's she she has her root in the arts The arts are in her blood A theater family Was a theater and opera director Her mother was an actress Her mother also I think was the heir

To some sort of like Shoe company fortune or something So they had Sunk all that money into a New Zealand Theater company One of the first professional theater companies in New Zealand so they had like they had sunk all that money into a new zealand like theater company one of the first professional theater companies in new zealand okay so they were like very arty family yeah and campion has talked about how she kind of resisted that poll interesting she didn't like she initially got like a BA in anthropology like you know what i mean like she

didn't go into the arts right away uh and i think she just wanted to avoid copying her parents incredibly stupid griffin on brand side tangent david have you ever seen the movie mirror mask uh no i've never seen the neil gaiman production no um what's his name? Dave McKeon. Right. That movie is not great, but it has a very obvious but effective sort of opening for this kind of dynamic,

which is she is a girl whose parents work in the circus and she's traveled around with the circus her whole life. And the whole movie is about the fact that she wants to run away from the circus

and go to a normal school. Right. She wants to rebel. She's the kid who's like, I've grown up around these artsy people and I want to live a very normal structured life. And then at the end of the movie she comes around to it. Anyway, I don't know. Jane Campion

of course seems like a very serious minded person. She's kind of like a Ned Flanders kind of type. I don't get a lot of Ned Flanders vibes from Jane Campion. No, Ben's on to something here. She does look a lot like Ned Flanders. She has glasses. But of Ned Flanders vibes From Jane Campion Ben's on to something here She does look a lot like Ned Flanders She has glasses But also Ned Flanders' parents were famously beaten Right there

They're hippies We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas My favorite Flanders parents This kid's a flat tire man He's taking us on the road to Squaresville I'm not saying this is Cubesville baby Holy unique man. He's taking us on the road to Squaresville. I'm not saying this is Cubesville, baby. I think it's Cubesville.

Holy unique. But for such a great artist, she does strike me as very serious-minded and pragmatic and grounded. Sure. I've got a quote here from our researchers, Nick and JJ,

where she's talking about anthropology, which for some reason in New Zealand is called structural arts. That's cool. Or something. Let me look it up. Let me find it. Yeah, structural arts. That is pretty cool. Yeah, I like that. My degree didn't really

lead me anywhere, but we had a fantastic professor, a Dutchman by the name of Power. Okay. I feel like in the 80s or 70s that she's going to school in new zealand in the 70s it's like if someone's in new zealand from another country yeah like that's probably sort of an interesting right where they're like you know what i'm moving to the ends of the fucking earth right i'm you know like it's not like the easiest thing in the world to get to new zealand now no but in the You know, anyway. No, well, it became like the fucking

cliche of like post Lord of the Rings and Bush re-election. So many people were like, I'm just going to fucking move to New Zealand. Get as far away from America as I can.

Right. Like it was thrown out. New Zealand's like, we don't want you, mate. Get out of here. It was thrown out by everyone. It's like, why don't I just pack it up

and move to New Zealand? I have met a couple people who did that. Yeah, no, sure. I mean, it's a beautiful country. I have met a couple people who did that yeah no sure I mean it's a beautiful country yeah it supports it you know

it's got a very good safety net they fucking handled COVID better than pretty much anywhere else up until a point in time well it's you know they're a tiny country

it's far away from everything they had a lot of advantages on that front but yes and they're also doing a lot more recently and like kind of coming to terms

with how they treated the aborigines. Yes. Which I think is also... We're going to talk about that. Like a more progressive sort of... But this is the thing. We fetishize these countries as Americans. I'm talking about

the post-Royalty Rings. These Scandinavian countries who are like, well, I'll just live there. And it's like, yeah, well, you know, it's like like five million people it's like the population of brooklyn over there gonna spread out in a gorgeous panorama of mountains and lakes and deserts and whatever anyway david the point i'm making is that is very much the modern perception of new zealand i think you're on to something that if someone's an expat living in new zealand in the 70s you're like what brought them here? What are you running from?

What's your life? Professor power. Right. Anyway, what interested me about anthropology, this is Jane Camp, was to be able to officially study what I was curious about anyway. How thoughts function. Yeah. Their mythic content, which has nothing to do with logic. Human behaviors.

I believe that I have an anthropological eye, a sense of observation. I loved both the theory and the poetry what a smart ass woman this is this is what I'm talking about though like she does not read as someone who grew up in an artistic family like when you read about fucking Julia DeCarno right and you're like

oh both her parents were doctors that makes perfect fucking sense she makes movies like the daughter of two doctors right and Jane Campion I would sooner believe like she was the daughter of two doctors right and jane campion i would sooner believe like she was the child of two therapists sure sure sure right but no but it's interesting that she was sort of rebelling against a more artistic family and then bringing a more kind of

perhaps uh academic mind to art she graduates from vict University. She travels Europe. She attends an art school in Venice. She calls this the best and darkest time in her early life. I think it was a lot of ups and downs. You know, she's in her 20s. So romantic to go study painting of Venice. I know. Then in 76, she moves to London, attends the Chelsea School of Arts.

This was a tough, lonely time for her, she says. You know, London in the 70s, God love London, but that's a rough time to be in London. That's like garbage piling up in the streets, you know, winter discontent. It's so funny, David. The fucking three-day work week. I always used to think that old London

was so glamorous and fun. Old London, damn. And I saw this movie called Last Night in Soho. Oh, boy. There was an underbelly to that one. This place ain't so nice, is it? Oh, stubborn, stubborn. Stubborn in the stupid witch way, isn't it?

You thought it was all, you know, pool halls and glamour balls and Cilla Black crooning. I thought everything was nice, isn't it? Yes. So, I wasn't even that interested in movies she says at this point like she didn't grow up with a big passion for movies her her love for movies is not yet developed really but she does say her mom would take her to like moonwell movies you know so it's not like she didn't have any you know her mother fancy pants artist parents they're taking her to see cool shit 77 she comes back

closer to home she goes to Sydney in Australia gets a BA in painting she likes art school she's really getting a lot of school hey man wow like Jane loves academic right yeah four eyes yeah well I say to her

well you are too I am true yeah um and it's sydney call of darts she's doing painting she likes that but um that's when she starts to get interested in you know visual arts writing little plays okay doing little performance pieces okay recording it on videotapes uh she didn't like the quality of videotapes so she decides to make her first short film tissues did you watch this movie no tissues i couldn't find that one might not be totally available that is about she makes four films and three of them are readily in circulation that is about a father arrested for child molestation yeah definitely didn't see that she made it on a super eight okay camera uh and she's kind of just like making it up as she goes along.

She's like learning on the job. She doesn't really know what she's doing. But making that inspires her. She applies for like a grant from like the Australian government or whatever. She meets Gerald Lee who she writes Sweetie with. Okay. So that's when she

kind of, you know, forms that early uh collaboration she makes an experimental video called mishap seduction and conquest did you watch this thing this doesn't seem to count i don't know that's like a weird art project the three i watch were uh appeal yeah aka an exercise in discipline okay so that girl's own story and passionless moments in 82 she makes a short film called Peel colon an exercise in discipline

which wins her the short film Palme d'Or the Cannes Film Festival pretty cool yeah so that's what it's about her friend

and her friend's family and there's conflict what's going on here it's an odd film I mean first of all it's very short it's like 7 minutes

with credits I think so it's a real short. It's like seven minutes with credits. I think so. It's a real short. And there's this interesting opening credit sequence where she establishes it says, you know, an exercise in conflict

and then peel in giant letters. And then it credits the three actors. Love that. You recognize the two of them share the same last name. And then the next title card is like a triangle establishing the family members and their relationships to each other right where it's like jack dad alice sister whatever i'm getting this right okay nephew son whatever it is and then it says like a real conflict based on a real family or something like that.

Right, because it was inspired by her friend's relationship with her family. Her friend's name, sorry, is Katie Pie. Right, it's the Pies. P-Y-E. The thing is essentially about this kid's in the backseat and they're driving to go to, like, a party. And the kid is eating an orange they have all these oranges on the dashboard and he like peels and he throws the peel out the window and then the guy is like pulls over the side of the road and is like you have to go pick that

peel up you don't litter and so he tells the kid to get out of the car pick the peel up and then the kid like doesn't come back and they're fighting about the fact that they're going to be late and he goes out and the kid is like clearly like now very burdened by the idea that he's done something horribly wrong and is like meticulously looking for every single piece of the peel to pick up and uh he's sort of trying to like console the kid and then he brings him back to the car and the woman has now in the time that she's waiting and being frustrated peeled her own orange and thrown it out of the car

and refuses to pick it up. That's like the whole thing. Would you give it the palm? The short palm? I would not. I would admit. You weren't into it. I was mildly perplexed by this thing. The other two shorts I think are great. Okay. Well, you know who also agrees with you? The Australia Film, you know, whatever, the Australian Film Commission, you know who uh also agrees with you the australia film you know whatever the guy

the australian film commission or you know they were like eh this thing stinks don't bother finishing it stink i was just like this is odd i don't totally i'm not they thought it's clicking okay well that's them um you know and so anyway but so she then makes uh she collaborates with gerald reed on a movie called Passionless Moments. Yeah. So it is sort of what it sounds like, where it's almost like this is like a series of like three panel comic strips of like awkward moments that people have. Odd things that don't seem to mean anything. Like two neighbors on either side of a fence and the one guy stretching his arm because he injured it and the other guy thinks that he's waving.

So then he has to commit to waving back, even though that wasn't what he was intending to do and it's like black and white as far as i remember there's like no dialogue really and it's sort of like a ricky j magnolia esque narration explaining like then there's the story of blank blank who was stretching his arm which is misinterpreted right it's just it's a funny sort of observational it's exactly what sounds like it's like these moments that are sort of meaningless right but are given some sort of meaning in terms of like they're these universal sort of odd things um yes it won an experimental film award from the australian film institute co-directed that she co-directed it with gerald lee who she was living with at the time okay Okay. I think they had a romantic relationship. Yeah. I don't want to tell any tales out of school.

Her final student film is called A Girl's Own Story. Now, this thing I think is a fucking knockout. And I don't know if this is... This is about teenage girls in the 60s. Yeah. I mean, this is maybe my semi-controversial opinion. I like this more than Two Friends. I think Two Friends is, if I'm ranking all her movies,

is her worst movie. Sure. I mean, it's got a lot of dna can't be in dna but i think two friends is like okay it's okay and story of a girl is like 25 minutes 27 minutes something like that and packs like a lot more punch and watching i watched these four things in chronological order and there's such a build to them where i'm like fuck you see her getting like better and getting more ambitious and getting larger that i was like i'm ready for fucking two friends and it didn't feel like a step back but there's just like uh sort of a girl's a a really kind of powerful, impactful object. Right. But it's almost like it reminded me a little bit of

like Celine Sciamma movies. It is a trifecta of girls coming to terms with their own sexuality, teenage girls in New Zealand trying to parse interpersonal romantic sexual

relationships both within themselves and their parents and their understanding of these things each other and it sort of has uh sort of like a series of weird ellipses a lot of the big scenes don't happen a crux of it is one girl getting pregnant but you don't actually see the sex scene everything you sort of find out in an odd order um but it's just really really fucking good it's like incredibly well made and impactful and you're really getting a sense of her as a visual stylist in this thing it's very off-putting uh and alienating in an interesting way uh a thing i read about it is that she wanted to cast nicole kidman who was a teenager at the

time i was about to drop that i'm'm sorry. Then you can say it. Nicole Kidman turned down a role in the film of her fears of kissing another girl on screen and being sexy, wearing a shower. Huge. They're part of a swim team. She did not want to wear the fucking... The cap? The cap.

It was like rubber cap? Yeah. They were pretty annoying. She also had pretty bug nuts hair at the time. If you look at BMX Bandits. BMX Bandits hair. She had this big curly hair cool yeah she's a fucking badass have you ever seen bmx bandits no the real ben ben yeah

that's one that's a movie that would run on british tv all the time isn't that what's his name that's sort of like really good orson welles that like aust Australian Brian Trenchard Smith? Yeah he is one of those guys He's just one of these pros who like Is like look the promise of a Brian Trenchard Smith movie is it's going to be A little better than it should be I just make genre films but I try to make

A little bit better than it should be So You've got Campion She's making these little movies She works on something called after hours another short that she made about workplace sexual harassment okay which she speaks poorly of she didn't like making it it was made for like the government again and and whatever i don't know she was whatever she does not think fondly of that movie she also worked on an episode of dancing days a

mini-series about two sisters who leave the family pig farm to pursue dancing careers in the big city that sounds cool david i'm letting you sort of uh parse the the dossier and lead us into this because she's one of your uh favorites this is kind of a little bit of a david's choice series um so i i i'm asking for your clarification here. I couldn't tell if it was just poorly written sentences. Not in our dossier, but in other stuff I was looking at. Did

Peele winning the Palme d'Or happen the same year that Two Friends was in competition? Okay. So it was all three of the shorts that are in the Criterion collection. Yeah. The three that I watched all screened at Cannes the same year as Two Friends. Like she had four different things at Cannes.

Correct. And she won, right, the short award. Okay. So that's like her huge fucking year where Cannes just sort of says like, Two Friends is in uncertain regard, right? Probably. Let me look at it. 1986 Cannes Film Festival.

Let's find out if the 1986... But it sort of immediately legitimizes... A notorious Palm winner. Do you know who won the Palm? What year? 86. Notorious? I mean, not really.

It's just like... It's not a bad movie, but it's insane that it won against some of these movies. Is it like... It's like a big studio film? Sort of. It's The Mission by Roland Jaffe, which is like a movie that's like very very pretty yeah and has this beautiful score but is like you know okay and it's up against like after hours down by law

um what are some other you know mona lisa i guess it's sort of the sacrifice the tarkov oh yeah yeah yeah it's that's a good year it is it's usually anyway in certain regards's sort of the sacrifice, the Tarkov story. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good year. It is. It is usually. Anyway, Uncertain Regards. It sort of single-handedly makes Campion someone to watch, right? Yeah. Is that fair to say you have three short films and a TV movie that are all legitimized by

the most prestigious film festival on the planet? Two of the shorts are in Uncertain Regards with two friends. Okay. They're screening together? A girl's own story. No, they're all separate. Okay. I mean, who knows? I don't know. I don't know if they all, maybe they all screen together. Yeah. That would two friends. Okay. They're screening together? A girl's own story. No, they're all separate. Okay. I mean, who knows?

I don't know. I don't know if they all, maybe they all screen together. Yeah. That would make sense. Yeah. And then Peel is in the short film competition and wins. That's weird.

Well, you know what? Peel is weird. Making me think, because you're saying competition and it's sounding kind of like the Olympics. Do judges after the movie hold up cars with numbers on it? Yeah, they hold up. No, they don't.

No, they go and they, I believe how it works. Great question. They sit in a little like box, like Staten Walder from the Muppet show. And the second the screen and the lights come up and they hold up the, if they go like this, thumbs down, the crowd was like, and then the stage opens up and like this, thumbs down, the crowd is like... And then the stage opens up and they drop the filmmaker down.

There was an episode of The Muppet Show where Statlin Waldorf did that. It was really funny where they just start writing sketches like they're Olympic judges. I mean, that's... Holding up numbers is actually just always funny. It's just funny. Can you tell me who the jury president was

in 1986? I'm going to say that it was of course Paul Hogan. He was doing everything in 86, wasn't he? It was the big dog, Sidney Pollack. Oh, wow. Some other big boys. Charles Aznavour

was on. Shoot the Piano Player. Love him. Sonia Braga. I posted the Muppet Show. Yeah, Sonia Braga. And back in the day when they had fucking film critics on the Cannes jury,

Philip French, who was a fucking legend. Isn't that cool? Berlin, I think, still will have one. But the others have dropped having a film critic, which is too bad

because it used to be... Like, imagine, like... Because you see the movies. I think it's like... I think every day you meet, having seen probably a few movies, right? You're 20 something that's what it is yeah they have i think they have like daily meetings and there's like there's like this woman what do you think and i believe who's like been doing it for years so she's there too and she writes down everything everyone says and it's sort of like oh so what did you think of to 10 and they're like oh

i loved it blah blah blah you know blah should be considered for acting you know and then so it's sort of like, oh, so what did you think of Tatan? And they're like, oh, I loved it. Blah, blah, blah. You know, blah should be considered for acting. And then so it's like when you finally gather at the end of it, she'll be like, well, you all said that Tatan was the best thing like five days ago. So, you know, like she's there to sort of remind you. But it's like an evolving conversation over the course of a week. And then I think you get contentious horse trading of like, okay, if it can't be best picture, can we at least give director,

you know, right. And you'll hear these stories about like, Oh, everyone thought this was going to win the palm door. But what it came down to is the president of the jury just didn't like it. Everyone else loved it. And the president,

the jury didn't like it. There's some things like that or, or opposite way around. You know, there's one thing they were pushing for really hard that no one else liked or whatever. Um, uh,

country would start letting a one podcaster into the jury i think they should do that day i think they should do that and i'd love to hear what he thinks whatever's playing at the all right one bite reviews i'm sorry what okay so um two friends two friends uh in 1986 abc not the American Broadcasting Company but the Australian Australian TV okay they've got a crew they allowed to do that you think they should sue I think so

now they should swoop in yeah the Australian Broadcasting Corporation had a crew available they had an opening in their production plan a screenplay by Helen Garner, who's a famous novelist. And they're basically like,

there's a window. Do you want to do that? Yeah, it's also a TV movie. Weird thing. I mean, time for TV movies, I think especially in other countries where it's like, we need things to fill up broadcasting hours.

I mean, that's how so many great British directors get their start in TV because especially back in the day, I think it's the same in Australia and New Zealand. There was government money. Come and make an hour-long drama. Come make a television movie. Something like that about issues.

About life. And that's like, it'll be good for the culture. Not just have trash on television. It'll develop. Not just American trash. And, you know, that's like, it'll be good for the culture, right? Yeah. Not just have trash on television. It'll develop. Not just American trash. Fucking American trash. Well, that's, David, that's a very good point also, is that in non-American countries, TV

seasons do not last as long as they fucking do. And shows don't run for as many years. Where they're like, there's space. Yeah. Our hottest show is only going to run six weeks a year. You know? It's just wild. Get some fucking film school graduates and give them an issues drama or just a very small slice of life story that we can make cheaply right but it's just wild as all you know we're all americans here

it's just crazy to think about we've all exclusively lived in the united states of america and so this notion of of my tax money went to some idiot who went to art school to make a movie, that just never happened here. Wouldn't it be great if we could be seeing people outraged about that? If that was a problem

where it's like, yeah, fucking complain about the fact that our government subsidizes the arts. Right, yeah. Can only imagine. Instead, it's like people don't want to pay for fucking social services. Right, people don't want to not die. I wish the arts were

the canard that they could complain about. They still fucking complain, though. They're always hauling Big Bird in front of Congress or whatever. I know, it's fucking insane. You piece of shit! I pay for this! Anyway,

Campion loves the script. She liked the freshness of observation, the truth. And this is just like an original spec script? Helen Garner, who is this novelist and writer,

she'd been inspired by the experiences of her daughter and one of her friends. Okay, but it's not based on one of her own novels, right? No, no, no.

And Campion goes and meets the girls Okay but it's not based on one of her own novels No no no And Campion goes and meets The girls that Garner's inspired by The titular two friends And You know Gets to work on this movie

And she has I feel like she has a pretty simple Camera style Apparently she fought with the director of photography Okay. And she has a, I feel like she has a pretty simple camera style. Apparently she fought with the director of photography. I had to be very obstinate to impose my views. My, you know, I don't want to cast any judgment on this DP,

but he might've been like, who is this young lady bossing me around, telling me how to set up a shot. She doesn't know. She didn't do a lot of takes. She didn't do close-ups this movie is really no close-ups at all yes kind of crazy yeah when you like start to realize like we're always at a distance from these girls i mean i not to jump ahead here but this is a movie where

and i think this is almost by design i get it, but I found this movie very hard to connect to until the last 20 or 30 minutes. I found it very alienating distancing, which I think was her whole idea. It's the idea. But it might be a little bit of a cut your nose to spite your face idea. It's also got this aggressive storytelling style where it's starting

at the end of their friendship and going backwards, which obviously is interesting. But the first four or five minutes, I was like, I cannot find my way into this thing you know ben in house of gucci they i think it's house of gucci maybe it's licorice pizza some movie i just saw this item is in a house oh nice which it's this is david's talking about my girlfriend has from her grandmother this like 60s uh it's got like a huge marble base. I think it must be in House of Gucci. Like kind of overhanging, kind of like

ceiling light. Yeah, it's cool. I don't know. Well, I'll take a picture. Sound off in the comments. I agree with you. Sound off in the comments. Yeah, it has to be in House of Gucci because you and I got a slice together. We did get a slice together and it's not in Licorice Pizza, right? It's in Gucci. I'm stoked to fucking see that. I feel like everyone's just hyping it up. Ben, you gotta get a slice together and it's not in licorice pizza, right? It's in Gucci. I'm stoked to fucking see that. I feel like

everyone's just hyping it up who I respect. I'm gonna have a pie. Yeah, you might want to order a whole pie. I'm gonna sit down. You know what I mean? I'm not even gonna get delivered. Sitting down. Oh, you're not gonna take out?

Dine in. One pie please. I'm taking a seat i'll be sitting over there table 12 look at my fountain root beer i'm gonna be sitting over here yeah nothing goes better with licorice pizza than root beer um helen garner accomplished novelist okay um she wrote a book called monkey grip about heroin addiction that is seen as a very important text in australian literature okay uh she's written some non-fiction stuff sort of true crimey stuff that is a big deal and uh i think she um got into screenwriting uh as she put it uh for the money interesting cash in it yeah i mean i mean she likes it but you know it is it is an interesting

this wasn't our first screenplay was it no and you know she eventually works with jane campion here obviously she works with jillian armstrong later who's another famous uh australasian female uh director so she liked working with those people uh she liked working with campion a lot i learned from jane campion to follow and intuition, no matter how alarmingly it swerves. I just think the conceit of this story is so novelistic. I'm surprised that she chose to write it as a script and not a book first. Yeah. You know,

she probably was asked to write a script and she's a novelist and she writes it all novel. Yeah. Yeah. I guess is the, but yeah, I mean, I love Jane Campion.

Yes. And she is so good at intimate emotion. At depicting it on screen, depicting the dynamics between people in ways that don't feel obvious, but you can understand the nuances of what's happening between two people. So I hear there's a movie she made

about two friends. It's about teenage girl friendship it's about two friends you're already i'm interested you're feeling competitive but you're on board uh even though this was made like the year i was born yeah territorial um and so right i and then like and i then to me like female friendship especially between teenage you know that's such a you're already like stiffening up you're like oh this is gonna be you know that's such a you're already like stiffening up you're like oh this is gonna be you know there's so much potential for hurt i think we're both sensi boys who like movies about female friendship yeah but you know like oh god this is probably and

i was engaged by this movie but i was not i think i was maybe hoping for something that was really gonna feel like searing yeah i was struggling to stay engaged until the end. It's a lot of awkward little moments and sort of odd dynamics with the parents and things like, you know, like, it is well done. Yes. But I just wasn't, you know, getting worked up. Yeah, yeah, I mean, right. Like, part of the idea here is that,

and you really, I know you're going to get this but you you should watch a girl's own story because it feels like the better execution of this in a lot of ways. And it's it's I think the the style and the craft and it's much stronger, but the dynamics are also a little more innately interesting to me and she's that's a movie where she goes from doing this kind of very distance obscured almost like voyeuristic camera placement to doing like very extreme in your face close-ups and the balance of the two helps i think versus this thing that's putting you to remove on purpose this movie is sort of like a tenant without the temporal pincer movement sure just backwards they don't go forwards at a certain point. At the end of the movie, you realize they were best friends, right? But it starts off with two people who seem like they couldn't have less to do with each other.

And, you know, an icy remove from each other. Yeah. And then slowly the intimacy comes in backwards and you start to understand how much things changed for them over the last year as they split them apart. And it's only set over the course of like a year. It's not even like...

And you have inner titles telling you like... X months earlier. July, two months earlier, whatever it is. It's very clearly delineated, but... Yeah, I don't... I think... Yeah, I don't know. I kind of agree with you that there's...

I wanted to fucking love this thing. I have some news for you. And I love it. Sheila Jacob, the famed, infamous honcho of Cannes for many years, saw this movie and all her shorts. Okay. The whole package.

Yeah. And takes Philip Adams, chairman of the Australian Film Commission. My guess is he grabs him by the lapel. Yeah. And pulls him close. And he says, listen up, buddy.

And he says, listen to me now. Yeah. You must give her lots of money so she'll be in competition here with a feature in a couple years. Like, he's basically like, this is the real deal.

That's what it's about. Pony up. That's the thing. Like, to have fucking three shorts and a TV movie all play a canon the same year feels like someone putting their foot down

and going like, attention must be paid paid we're calling the shot right now that this is a major artist you know we've covered some directors who came out of the gate like pretty close to fully formed right have just kind of like impeccable first films sure but there's something fun about anytime we get to go back to someone's first film that is really kind of like primordial like this because it's a loveless or um yes trying to think of other debuts that feel that way i mean i don't like this movie as much but the praying with anger following is a great example right where there is this weird kind of like time machine effect where it's like you're watching this movie that is a director

trying to figure themselves out with the knowledge of the future you know so you're seeing it through the prism of like what does exist here at the earliest stages what have they not figured out yet i do always get that kind of rush every time we watch like a forgotten first film by someone who goes on to be someone major later and And if we're covering them on the show, they by default have become major to one extent or another. Yeah. I'm trying to think of things to say about Two Friends. It's got some punk in it.

Ben, tell me about your viewing experience, huh? It's got some punk in it. It's got some punk in it. Yeah, so one of the friends is a little more punk than the other. Right, well, I would say kind of more maybe new wave right to be more accurate yeah yeah but um that is right away drew me in and that she's like having this like the movie starts off with her having this rebellious moment yes and to what you're saying david I like how understated it is that this girl is making such a poor choice. And you're kind of like, how is everyone in her life letting her do this?

But then again, as the movie goes on, it kind of really, yeah, you really come to understand it. Well, in the very end of the movie, which is chronologically the beginning, is this this girl saying, I'm like, I'm never going to do drugs ever in my life. Right. Right. Yeah. I mean, it does, I'll say this, it does evoke that thing when you are a teenager and everything feels so high stakes. Yes. And things can change so radically over the course of a month.

Yeah. And, right, like you're just like, I will be friends with this person for the rest of my life in a month later, like, I'm never talking to them ever again. And also that. And people go through weird phases and extreme life events and all that rest of my life. And a month later, you're like, I'm never talking to them ever again. And also that. And people go through weird phases and extreme life events and all that sort of shit. That's sort of foolish, but, you know, understandable way that we act as teenagers. Where we're like, every decision I make is really important. Poorly, yeah.

You know what I mean? Like, where it's like, this is, you know, I'm deciding on my personality here. Yeah. You know, like, it's still exciting. Yes. Yes. Now I'm like, I just want to take personality here. It's still exciting. Now I'm like, I just want to take a nap. David, mind taking a nap. Truly, the longer this show goes on,

the thing that still rings in my head the most is Detective Dormer saying, let me sleep. Of all the movies we've covered, I just constantly think about him just lying there. Please let me sleep. At all times, my reaction to almost everything now is like, I don't want to deal with this.

Just let me sleep. And you know, when I was a teenager and I saw Insomnia in theaters, I was like, he's so old. Yeah, this fucker. Of course he wants to sleep. Right. Then you watch Insomnia and now you realize he's 35. Right. Now I watch and I'm like, oh, this is 20 years ago, Pacino's still kicking.

Yeah. How scary would that be, though, if that's a movie where you realize, like, he's 35 in this? Geno's my age in this? Right. The fuck? The fucking Homer Simpson, Tony Soprano thing. Oh, man. How old is that character?

I looked it up, Ben. I looked up what Ned Flanders' dad says. Okay. Oh, man. Ned's building all over my poems. He's a real flat tire. I mean, a cube, man. He's putting us on the train to Squaresville So it is to Squaresville

But he also calls him a cube Nice Whoopsie doodle Flunder's low key One of the best characters of all time Great character What do you think of the later revelation That he has a giant dick

Remember when the Simpsons snuck that in Like season 10-ish? We had a very heated conversation about this with the Doughboys. We did? Yes. About his big dick? In our text search. Because I was trying to watch every episode of The Simpsons. Yeah, right, right, right. In the pandemic. And then I slowed down because I got freaked out about

what if I finish watching 32 seasons of The Simpsons before there's a vaccine? Sure, America is not unfucked. Right. Look, I was getting ahead of myself. America will never again be unfucked. But Weiger was arguing it's a double beat.

You already have the thing that Flanders is surprisingly ripped. They reveal a street car. And then the fucking whatever the episode is with the skiing super sexy flanders right right and then the additional he has a big dick is like you don't

need it already the fact that he's like secretly caught i agree with that i agree but i kind of like the idea of him being ashamed of having a big dick i guess so i but i agree with weiger that like right you already did the work like And stupid sexy Flanders can't be top. Because it's funny because Homer is acknowledging that he's sexy. Yeah. It'd be one thing if Homer was just like, ah, I can't stop thinking about Flanders. He's like, stupid sexy Flanders. Yeah, no, it's perfect.

It's perfect. First 10 seasons of Flander characterization, it's one of those things where every time they add a new wrinkle or depth, you're just like, this guy just got more interesting. The fucking beatnik parents. When do they kill maude that's later that's like it's a 12 11 or 12 that was oh yeah that that episode is horrendous and that's sort of a point of no return that's a real that's a real tough episode that episode in in and of itself is bad like aside from that being a bad choice of a storyline, it's bad. Didn't they kill her because the actress laughed

or died? Correct. But they justify as like, it feels like a way to mix up the status quo. And I'm like, you're never going to carry this with appropriate weight. You're a show that doesn't care about serialization. And then the actress ended up coming back and now they've had Maude a couple of times as like a ghost. God, it's still on.

Yeah. It's that weird thing of like the simpsons premieres the year i'm born sure does and i just can always track like oh yeah that's the exact span of my life they've been making simpsons episodes every single moment of my life yeah and which one of us will die first the balenciaga thing too i haven't watched yet but i'm interested i just also find it so fucking weird what are you talking about the simpsons crossed over with balenciaga you know homer wears a big jacket yes oh yeah you didn't hear about they do like a product line or they just did like an animated well thing i pretty sure that it's in an episode it's in an episode. It's in an episode, I think. It was like they used the Simpsons to debut their new. Correct.

I'm looking here. There's a $995 Balenciaga Simpsons hoodie. Yep. And a $595 Balenciaga Simpsons shirt. So it does seem like they made some products as well. Can I say something, Griff? Yeah. Worth it.

There's also a keychain that costs $260. I don't think any of these items look good. Ben, have you ever been to a fashion show? I've never been invited. No, no one's invited me.

You should go. You should do it. I would love to. It seems fun. Yeah, it does seem like a blast. But you know what? You want to be on the first row, I feel like.

Well, I got to. Yeah. I'm a first row guy. It's pretty hard. So if anyone out there knows somebody you know i'm like i'm so open to it these items are insane they look like t public shit they do they literally just have like simpson shit printed on right and like this keychain looks like something you would get from the simpson shop at universal studios except like it looks like the fucking crusty land keychain that i have yeah except it costs 260 dollars yeah it looks like the fucking Krusty Land keychain that I have. Yeah.

Except it costs two hundred and sixty dollars. Yeah. It looks no different in terms of materials and it's just it's probably pretty nice happen to be

wearing Balenciaga on it better be and Jane Campion directed this that's why I bring this yeah Jane Campion loves the Simpsons. Anyway I've been on the Simpsons everyone has

happy plus aversary everybody. God. Doughboys are on the Simpsons. Everyone has at this point. Happy plus-aversary, everybody. Oh, God. Doughboys are on The Simpsons. They were. They were drawn on, at least. That fucking rules, man. Mitch has voiced a character.

Oh, has he? There's an episode where The Simpsons go to Boston and they cast Mitch as hometown boy makes good. But then they drew Mitch. Correct. They drew Mitch and Weiger non-speaking in an episode of a podcast. Sharpling and Worcester. Right. You know a bunch of bunch of podcasters right right the mount podmore

yeah the big boys um two friends yep chris bidenko and emma coles what's with the dad oh he's bad news yeah because his whole deal is like he's like so progressive that he's like flipping the conservative dad kind of trope right am i am i wrong yeah yeah i'll admit i keep on in my head i'm running shit from a girl's own story and two friends in together because i watch them back to back right girl's own story has one of those bizarre parent dynamics i've ever seen in a way that's really fascinating. So the dadness stood out to me less because I was just coming off of the like, what's going on with that fucking dad? But yes, I feel like she's way ahead of the curve commenting on people who go out of their way to project a sense of liberalism.

Yeah. Right. To cover up for their shortcomings. Yeah. Right. of liberalism. Yeah. Right.

To cover up for their shortcomings. Right. Just a reminder that things that people argue about is if their new problems are things that have been going on for time immorium and that

we live in a cyclical society that just repeats the same shit over and over again every 10 years. So yeah you've got I mean like just to give the vague plot I guess

you've got Louise who's the more straight laced one. The David. It's probably true. You see I'm, who's the more straight-laced one. The David. That's probably true. You see, I'm less straight-laced than you in some ways. I don't know. In what ways? I don't know.

David doesn't want to say that. Kelly... He's got curly laces. Yeah, I got curly laces. Kelly is the more punk-ish one. The Ben? Yeah. Yeah, kinda. Wait, Ben, what's the deal with you watching this movie, though? What's the subtitle thing?

Oh, yeah, you were telling us. What's the story? So I fucking watched. I didn't realize it was on Criterion. So instead, I watched through some really random

film company that now I'm like, hold on, let me see. Yes. You rented it from their site or on Vimeo? I watched it through their site, which is being powered by Vime You rented it from their site or on Vimeo? I watched it through their site, which is being powered

by Vimeo. You can't watch it on Vimeo. It had no subtitles. Because their site is primarily the rentals are like, do you want to screen this for your film class? It's less meant to be like a storefront for individual movies. It's like for academic purposes, here's the license to watch this movie.

So you watched it there. No subtitles. So for me, I was... You didn't understand most of what they were saying. I had no idea. Yeah. The accents are heavy. I had to click those subtitles on real fast.

I'm sure. Yeah, you were going to have some accents, you know? And it's also like, there's some teen slang that's now 40 years old. So it's like, the subtitles were helpful. I'm sure. Yeah. I was there's also a low budget film where the sound quality isn't the best it's a little muddled sometimes

sure right the scan is not perfect so what's gonna happen is Kelly is gonna basically by the end of the movie be like almost homeless yes and like doing drugs by the end of the movie you mean the beginning of the film exactly sorry by the end of their friendship by the end of the movie you mean the beginning exactly

by the sorry by the end of their friendship yes the beginning of the movie right um but right but louise is the one who actually has the sort of permissive parents who don't really cock an eyebrow at everything at anything and right which i get like this sort of the kid who kind of goes conservative to rebel against the permissiveness, like, makes sense to me. I need kids like that. That also makes sense from the campaign perspective. Not that she's conservative, but the idea of, like, if you have loosey-goosey artsy parents, that maybe you become a cerebral, you know, academic. Yeah.

No, no, for sure. And, like, you know, which is what I expected more from this one. You know, there's the stuff with their like romances. They don't know how to talk about it with each other. Yeah. In different kinds of ways. Right.

Like, and just like, that's to me, so fundamental to depictions of team friendship is like, it's so tough for team friendships to handle romance sometimes, especially like really tight knit friends. Yeah. You know,

one of them gets a boyfriend or a girlfriend it's like even like hard to navigate that dynamic where puberty sort of hits right you can hit people different like some people are right early you know like early on and are going through um i was kind of i guess early. Sometimes it hits very late. Like, I'm hoping the next year or two. 2022, I think, might be a big one for me. What about you, David? Huh?

What about you? I feel like I was late. I was always tall. Well, right. How young did you crack six feet? Like 12. Okay. I think.

And that is when you're like... I think when I was 12, I think and that is when you're like I think when I was 12 I was 6'1 Jesus fucking Christ and my doctor I think when I was 12 I was 4'9 like I'm not even joking

I remember it being a big deal when I cracked 5 I'm now I'm trying to it took a while I may have been 14 I just remember there was some age it was either 12 or 14

when I hit I was over 6 feet I was the same height as my dad I was 6'1 and my doctor was like you might be done you might have like a little left wow yeah and i i had two more inches to go i think i was i think i may have been 12 and i like hit six three when i was 14 and that was that so i was like 19 my doctor was like you might have another inch or two in you and i was like come on let's go i had friends like that who sometimes added a few inches in the college i know i kept on hoping like yeah it was funny like the kids who were very small and like they actually just were really late

i mean my like grow mother and father but like i feel like my voice broke when i was like 13 like i was a little late on some of that stuff sure Sure. I don't know. What happened to me, I will say, is that I'm a size 12 foot and basically just had that right away. And David is He's putting his eyebrows up and down. You have fucking clown feet?

I've always had clown feet. It was like a moment where I was really clowning it up. Walking around. Hey. My It was like a moment where I was like really clowning it up, walking around. Hey, hey. Stupid sexy host. Hey.

My mother and father are both very small people. They're small people. Your mother is comically. My mother is comically petite. And it is like a fucking porcelain doll. And then my paternal grandparents were small. I mean, my grandfather was stocky, but not particularly tall. My grandmother was tiny.

My maternal grandmother was tiny. My maternal grandfather was like over six feet tall. And whenever we complain about the fact that we're short, my grandmother's like, I tried. I tried to put some tall DNA into the pool. Well, it's there now yeah he was like 6 foot 1 bright red hair and none of us got

no no you did not no no what if you end up having like a kid and they're like on the basketball team

and are like dunking and you're like you know at those games do you know what's the thing I'm actually dreading you'd be proud

do you know what I'm actually dreading? What? I'm dreading the day that David's daughter is taller than me and how soon it's going to happen. It's not going to be that soon. It's going to be pretty fucking soon. For people who don't know, Forky, David's wife, is also over six feet.

She's 6'1". She's going to be so goddamn... Who knows? Maybe my daughter will be small. I hope so. There's small people in the family. I need something. Smaller.

How tall is she now? Like three foot four? Nine months, three foot four? She's going to the doctor next week, so we'll find out. Get her. I've done... I'm keeping track of how many inches

I have on her still because I'm just like, it's not going to last long. You should draw Griffin... By the time she's sick, she's going to be dunking on me. ...at your apartment, just like, you know,

penciling a little line. David! David! David! If I get a full-sized, full-scale cutout of myself, will you put it in the doorframe so you can measure the boss baby against me to see what she does?

Stop it. Crazy person. I think that'd be a fun way to track progress. Oh yeah, you think that'd be fun? Yeah to track progress oh yeah you think that'd be fun is there any other sequences that stick out to you I think the last 20 minutes of this are really good which is when you get to like the honeymoon phase the courtship the sort of giddiness of finding a new friend

the passing notes sequence is really fun that's really good the letters themselves are really fun and there's the sort of the dance sequence when they're all like singing and dancing along with the pop song

that's really fucking fun. It also is interesting because we'll talk about Sweetie next week. Great movie. But Alex Ross Perry and I, a friend of the show, saw that together

at Lincoln Center a couple years ago. We did some double feature of two movies at Lincoln Center together. And we saw something and we were like, Sweetie's playing. Have you ever seen Sweetie? We should see Sweetie, right? That's like an important thing. feature of two movies at lincoln center together and we saw something and we're like sweetie's

playing after that have you ever seen sweet we should see sweetie right that's like an important thing and we both knew nothing about it and we're not prepared for how like goofy and stylized sweetie very much so sweetie is a movie that very much has the aesthetics of babe it does it's got bright colors and the other thing that's sort comedic energy. It has true first film energy of her being like, let me try this. Right. Let me try a lot of stuff.

Let me put everything into in case I never get to make anything ever again. The last 20 minutes of this have a little bit of that sweetie energy. Obviously,

this was made on, I'm sure, a very tight schedule and budget. Yeah. It's not, she had less room to try stuff like that.

But I don't want to be a broken record here. A Girl's Own Story has more of this energy, not throughout, but interspersed. It's got the distancing, but it's interspersed with sort of odder sequences. I just found that film a lot more impactful. The last 20 minutes of this

premiere worked. I struggled with the first close to hour. It's a film that's only an hour and 18 minutes long. It's like hour 29, yeah. I'd be curious. I'm not like in an eager rush to rewatch it right away.

I'd be curious to rewatch it to see if it plays better with the whole thing in your head a second time. Maybe. I mean, in a lot of ways that those, a lot of those backward movies

Yeah. you know, worked entirely differently the second time you see them. But I do think the sort of like oblique distancing from the characters

at the beginning is an intellectual idea I understand that makes it a little hard to engage when I turned this on I knew it wasn't backwards

yes but if you don't know that I think the first 15 minutes are pretty alienating it is like friends I think even so

it's alienating I was watching i was like who are the who am i following here like because there's a lot of adults in the first sequence as well and you don't really know who's who and right yeah and everything shot from remove and the characters make very heavy accents and at the beginning everyone's like cold and dispassionate and so it's i get it like all of this is like and i feel like loveless is a similar thing where i'm like i don't know if i enjoy watching this movie i get it i see what you. And so it's, I get it. Like all of this is like, and I feel like Loveless is a similar thing where I'm like,

I don't know if I enjoy watching this movie. I get it. I see what you're doing here. It's interesting. Passionless. They're compelling pieces. This seems like it has

connection to Passionless Moments, you know, not that I've seen Passionless Moments, but like a lot of mundane stuff. Like picking up on little interesting details. Yeah, but Passionless Moments

is like funny. It's got this weird comic strip kind of like energy to it. I do have a box office game for us. Oh, wow.

Because this movie was released in New York City on April 24th, 1996. This fully fucking counts. If it got a theatrical release. We're talking 10 years later. It must have screened.

Okay, so then retrospectively. Sure. But still, April 24th, 1996. David're talking 10 years later. It must have screened retrospectively. Sure. But still, April 24th, 1996, David Sims' 10th birthday. Wow. I'm actually in London at that point, but I am a New Yorker. Wait, I'm sorry. What? Move there

in 95. Stayed till 08. God, I had a bunch of follow-up questions that just were eradicated by this revelation. I don't even know what to say now. So I wasn't in town. I may have been in town, because I usually would come in town in April, Passover.

But I did live in England. But it did debut there at that time. It's not on the chart. I'm not seeing it here. I'm not seeing it on the chart. Probably played at the Quad for like two the cinema village no probably come on it was probably like lincoln center it was post piano probably some kind of campion thing i don't know something cool like that okay right yeah maybe showed sweetie and angel at my table yeah um

so we can do that box office game yeah is there any other i mean the boys wrote a whole like history of australian cinema in the dossier dossiers maniac this is the thing like sometimes i read the dossier and i'm like is the show better if we just read everything they wrote verbatim i mean there's certainly enough material the thing that's interesting and that they're sort of talking about is like australian cinema did have this early boom sort of centered around the wars and the depression and stuff like but in by the 70s by the time campions coming around it

had been like decades of dark ages like really not really making a lot of homegrown cinema at all but then 80s are this boom revival period because Mad Max and Dundee and Peter Weir and George Miller and all this you know like because she's a New Zealand director but obviously she makes movies in Australia

Picnic and Hanging Rock and Mad Max are sort of the two like movies that reboot the Australian industry because Mad Max that's the ausploitation trashy and then Picnic and Hanging Rock that's like the classy artier stuff

both of those directors crossover. They sure do. As do, of course, so many Australian directors and performers. It's a real powerhouse for acting, I feel like. So many great actors come out of it. I know he's another New Zealand guy who often gets miscategorized as an Australian, but

someone was tweeting the other day, just a complete memory hole, forgotten about this. When Al-Qaeda wanted to kidnap Russell Crowe to destabilize American culture pre-9-11. They did? This was like a People magazine front cover story. Once I started digging into this, I was like, oh yeah, I fucking remember this. By the way, Russell Crowe was born in New Zealand, but I think he spent most of his life in Australia. He is more Australian

than New Zealand in a lot of ways. And certainly worked more in Australia. Yes. Romper Stomper. Romper Stomper. You ever seen that movie?

Romper Stomper, isn't it? Pretty good. Plays like a Nazi. Romper Stomper. Like a neo-Nazi. You know, like a skinhead. Bad.

Stay away. No. Don't do it. No, I didn't know about that, Griffin. I didn't know that Osama Bin Laden tried to kidnap Russell Crowe. I guarantee you knew this at the time.

That was part of their thing where they were like, how do we fuck with Americans? What if we kidnap their most beloved movie star, Kiwi Russell Crowe? It speaks to how big he was in that one fucking moment where everyone was like,

well, he's going to be Charlton Heston, right? He will remain this iconic for 40 years. So in the 70s, obviously you do have people like Peter Weir, Gillian Armstrong emerging, right? But you also apparently, very popular, the Ocker comedy. What? Which was the sort of like, kind of, I suppose, the sort of American Pie type movie of its day.

Really? Celebrating male sexual exploits, vulgar, anti-intellectual, you know. Is this a subgenre or is the thing called the awkward comedy? Awkward, A-O-C-K-E-R. It's like a subgenre. It's like a sort of, you know, trashy lowbrow comedy. What are like the prime examples of that? Let's see.

Let's see. What are some awkward movies? Like who comes out of the ochre is this like rick mayall and yahoo serious ochre apparently um recorded as a nickname for anyone called oscar the australian comic strip ginger megs had a character called oscar and that became the sort of term you use for like a youth you know who's up to no good so it's like if we started a bad boy if we called like raunchy teen comedies the ziggy movies exactly so you've got a stork the adventures of barry mckenzie oh look out for this guy uh which is barry humphries oh you know

who eventually is dame edna and bruce the Shark. Bruce the Shark and... Alvin Purple. Yeah, sure. Look at this poster. It's got people fucking... Yeah. Feet together. So that's one kind of movie. Okay.

There's also just softcore porn. Very popular. Very popular. Yeah. You could go to a theater. Well, because it's pre-VHS. No, I know know i'm just saying go you're hogging a fucking amc that's so wild yeah it's well to think about that that was like

just sat there and then you're like i'm gonna jerk it later thinking about that's the thing i think people have a better you know imagination that's the thing that's insane to think about is like there was this moment where like going to a porno theater became like weirdly mainstream but the roles were like but don't masturbate and people were like I think I'm going to do it and they're like don't do it. Right. I mean and then you know they drop

off and the thing becomes like oh if you go to a porno theater there are going to be like three guys there. Like three weird guys in trench coats. They're definitely jerking off. Jack Nicholson from The Departed is there. Right. Back to Australian cinema for a second. I'm kind of having fun with this now. So like something like Picnic and Hanging Rock

obviously gets the acclaim, but it doesn't make the dollars and cents. The dinero. What is the money, the currency from the Australian dollar? Oh, they just call it that? And you know their money, it's like plastic. Yeah, it does suck. So you can go in the water with it i'm not joking really yeah their money's like

plastic it's like it's not paper it's got it's like made out of waterproof material i mean it's an island country okay it's a big fucking island yeah yeah i want to be sure that i'm saying that's always something that people talk about but now i want to make sure it's not some like british stereotype about stupid aust stupid Australians who go swimming with their fucking plastic monies in it. Yeah. Polymer. It's made of polymer. I just want to say it's not just because like Australians like go in the water and they're like, oh, my money.

Oh, it's gone. Like it's because it's, you know, more durable. It doesn't like, you know, to spend money like, you know, it's better for the environment. Also, you can throw it on the Barbie. You can throw it on more durable. It doesn't have to spend money. It's better for the environment. Also, you can throw it on the Barbie. You can throw it on the Barbie. You know that old catchphrase, throw another dollar on the Barbie. We probably talked about this a little in the Mad Max episode,

but Mad Max is the moment where it's like, well, they never even considered going to the government because they knew the government would never give them money to make that. Yes. And it becomes such a huge hit that they totally reorganize the industry. And they're like, okay, the government's kind of out there needs to be like private funding of movies because like this thing is commercial this thing is good that insane fact that like mad max was almost

exclusively financed by doctors it's like george miller's medical school friends who had made a lot of money in successful practices and we're just like yeah movie why not it's a safe business um yeah so uh the box office game for april 26 1996 come on let's do it okay april 26 1996 okay so there's four new movies at the box office this week which is kind of part of the fun yeah and one of this is april and this is a dire box really this is some shit um number one is an action film from one of the action stars at the time. One of the lesser ones. No offense. A lesser one. And I would say it's one of his lesser films. He directed

it. He directed it. It's sort of one of those, you know, it happens a lot of these guys like as things are starting to get a little shaky. They're like, well, what the thing is that I should make. Is it Van Damme or Seagal? It's Van Damme. And I looked this up the other day and I forget which one he directed so seagal directed what fire down below is that the one he directed yeah right it's the environmental one right it's the masterpiece

yes that is uh he i'm sorry he didn't direct it but he that is the one that's environmental maybe seagal never directed a movie seagal did Didn't he direct the environmental movie? Seagal directed a movie He definitely directed a movie I mean Sorry He definitely He directed On Deadly Ground Thank you I'm sorry

I was about to pull the title Yes Okay Yeah What's this Van Damme movie called? It's called The Quest Right It's the one where he's going to Tibet I think

Yep Uh huh Not a good actor And there's going to be like a big fighting tournament in Tibet Not a good actor Jean-C gonna be like a big fighting tournament in tibet not a good actor jean-claude van damme yeah i would say probably the worst of the bunch of like 80s action stars he's become a better actor right he's actually as he's aged gotten a little grit to him i mean he's the villain in the expendables too? Is he the villain? 2, and I believe his character's name is Villain. Well, Villain.

He directed another movie in 2010. How was it? It's called Full Love. Original title, Frenchie. But yes, I do feel like when he was at his peak with Time Cop and Universal Soldier and all that,

yes, he was... It was that he was acrobatic and he could do the splits and all that. Yeah, he's not a good actor. I also feel like, unlike Seagal, he has talked about the fact that he was acrobatic and he could do the splits and all that. Yeah, he's not a good actor. I also feel like, unlike Seagal, he has talked about the fact that he was cocky

and lazy and high in his own supply and that he kind of fucked it up for himself. Sure. And you watch Universal Soldier Day of Reckoning, a film I love. Good movie. And he's got an odd amount of gravitas in that where you're like, holy shit.

Where did this fucking come from? I think when his career bottomed out, like a guy like Seagal who went further up his ass Van Damme was like I need to like appreciate what I have and work for what I want he's not an asshole in the way that he used to be right he used to maybe be an egotistical guy but

I think he's gotten mellowed out so some of the other people in the quest Roger Moore old Roger Moore. Wild. Older Roger Moore. James Remar. I mean, this is the on deadly ground thing

where it's like, now I'm ready for my serious statement. I want to make a serious movie. Jack McGee. Love Jack McGee. Love Jack McGee. Anytime I can get some McGee,

I want it. Yep. Remember he was so good in the fight. So good. And Moneyball, he's one of the... Great Moneyball.

One of the scouts. Yeah. I watched that fucking first scene in Moneyball. Not the first scene, but one of the great moneyball one of the scouts yeah i watched that fucking first scene in moneyball not the first scene but the first like boardroom scene where all the scouts are talking and brad pitt does the like blah blah blah blah i watched that scene like fucking five times a day i'm gonna watch moneyball right now i'm gonna throw it on so good number two it's uh chick flick okay rom-com of the 90s classic watching on a plane uh long title it's not rome michelle's high school reunion no that's a good right that's what i'm trying to think of something is not lower that yeah but it's a long title yeah long time truth about cats and dogs

the truth about cats and dogs yeah uh made 34 million dollars at the u box office. That was a reasonable hit. So, fuck you. Yeah. Sort of a Cyrano de Bergerac thing from what I remember. Yes. It's Cedric Thurman and Janine Garofalo, right? Right. And Janine is the sort of

Cyrano. And is this the same year as Jerry Maguire? Yeah, 96. Right. Because Cameron Crowe said he wrote the Renee Zellweger part

for Janine Garofalo and the studio wouldn't hire her unless she lost weight. That's the famous story there. But so that's sort of her like... Totally different movie with her. I know. I mean, I love Jeanine, especially in this period. Of course, she rules.

But I feel like that was sort of, not her consolation prize movie, but that was the like, fuck, I need to do one of these. I was told I was about to be like a rom-com star. Put me above the title. Right. I remember that movie being cute.

I think I saw it on a plane. Yeah. Ben Chaplin, Jamie Foxx. Young Jamie Foxx is in it. Mm-hmm. Directed by Michael Lehman, the king. Is he Ben Chaplin's best friend?

Is he the... I don't know. Okay. I don't know. I don't remember. That's the truth. He plays a character called Ed. Oh.

Don't know. Number three at the box office is it was number one the week before okay it's in its fourth week of release and it spent three weeks at number one this movie spent three weeks at number one it is a legal thriller that got an oscar nominee the client no when you hear that this movie was three weeks at number one i know it's a different time in Hollywood. It's April was not like primal fear. Primal fear.

Yeah, it was a big hit. Three weeks at number one. It was a big hit. It was a pretty big hit. It was a pretty big hit. And you know, there's that.

How do you follow the Oscar clips account? Yes. They, I forgot the Edward Norton's Oscar clip reveals the twist of primal fear. It is the last scene in the movie, basically. Is it? I was,

I, so I only watched Primal Fear for the first time in the last like two years. I guess it's not the scene where he reveals that he doesn't have the stutter. That's the first of the two twists. Uh, but right.

It's one, everyone's one of the two. It's that he did it. Right. But you're right. The question is whether his motivations. Right. And which one's the dominant personality.

But also, David, by that point, Primal Fear is getting an Oscar nomination like 10 months after it's blown up the box office. Right. It's like everyone's seen this. They know what the fucking thing is. Yeah. Primal Fear. That movie's not very good.

No, it's not. And you throw it on. Yeah. Which I did a few years ago. And it's like, Gere,ura linney john mahoney alfrey woodard francis mcdormand terry o'quinn andre brower you're just like yes yes yes yeah and then it's like it's it's kind of whatever and it's sort of long it's like two hours plus the fascinating thing with it too is like that's the movie where like fucking edward norton is like a

drama school student who out of nowhere gets this fucking prime role and everyone in Hollywood is like this is the new leading man Academy Award nomination anointment you're the guy right like two years later he's on the cover of Andy Fair and it's like is there any question Edward Norton is the actor of his generation when he does the score with the Nero and Brando everyone's like of course the course, the three titans. Three generations, right? And you watch that movie now and the Edward Norton shit holds up the worst. That performance does not really work through modern eyes. And at the time, everyone was like, this is

sort of embarrassing. Richard Gere got out-acted by Norton. Here's a Richard Gere vehicle and Norton's running circles around him and the Gere shit's kind of creaky. And you watch it now and you're like, Gere shit's kind of good. Gere's solid. The thing with Norton is he's a good actor, but the gear shit's kind of creaky and you watch it now and you're like gear shit's kind of good gear's solid the thing with Martin is he's a good actor

but the performances he's most famous for are the really gimmicky over the top tick filled things and also kind of synonymous with really toxic

kind of stuff there's a part of that but I think it's more than asshole Fight Club to me is just like a thing that I was obsessed with in high school. You were into Fight Club?

I don't want to talk about it, David. Wait, what? You wanted to like make bombs out of soap? Don't make him talk about it. Don't make me talk about it. The Fight Club is one of the trickiest texts to parse. That's a good movie. Look, I think his performance in that holds up great.

I think he's great in that. He's so good in that movie. I think the norm performances that hold up better, as you said, the very ticky actor showcases, look at how I trained myself to do this fucking thing. David's doing a jerk-off motion. I kind of agree. Allison Wilmore wrote a really good piece about it

when Mother of a Broken Kid. He sometimes fucking nails it. I mean, it's so funny. It's so good in People vs. Larry Flint. When he's playing the kind of ordinary guy, he's amazing. Also, Wes ordinary guy. Yeah. Amazing. Also, I mean like Wes Anderson's been using him great.

Sure. But Wes Anderson has gone totally against his intensity. Yeah. He's so fucking good in Moonrise and in Budapest. I think he's great in Birdman. Like that movie is

a pain in the ass. But that also he's good in it. That felt like him making fun of himself. Exactly. That's why it was it was fun and self-aware.

He's weirdly good at comedy. Yeah, he is. And he's good at playing normal guys. And if you give him like a thing to exactly. That's why it was fun and self-aware. He's weirdly good at comedy. Yeah, he is. And he's good at playing normal guys. And if you give him a thing to play. What's it called? Keeping the faith?

He's very good at the smoochy. Keeping the faith, he's good. Keep the faith in that one. Yeah, but the big, can you believe Edward Norton did this? Those are just...

I guess American History X is like the magnum opus performance, which is compelling. I don't like that movie. I hate it. Yeah. I haven't seen it.

It's just so ugly and dark. Number four at the box office, Griffin. It's one of those movies that when I was a kid, I'm 10 years old, right? And this movie comes out, I would see posters for it. And I'd be like, that's a fucking grown-up ass movie. What is that? What's that about?

Boring-ass movie for grown-ups. It's a crime thriller, sort of a neo-noir, directed by a New Zealand filmmaker, in fact. Is it Alita Mahori? It is. Is it Mulholland Falls? It's Mulholland Falls. Nolte, Melanie Griffith,

Chaz Palminteri, Michael Madsen, Chris Penn, Jennifer connelly is hidea in that or do i just want him to be in that bruce dern we got any hidea no hidea he should be oh i thought he said zendaya yeah zendaya is in it she plays michi uh malkovich apparently shows up i still don't know what that movie's about it kind of went nowhere yeah i just know it's like men in hats and there's crime it looks so prestigey for a movie that no one seems to love literally based on the hat squad which was like a famous lapd detective unit i'm wearing a hat look at my hat i'm gonna go fuck jennifer connelly while wearing a hat you know i don't think it cost a fortune the budget here is 2929 million. It's just back in the day.

Yeah. Like, you know, it's MGM. They're like, yeah, sure. Mulholland Falls. That'll sell. This is the thing. I mean, this is what we fucking lost. Like, you know, I feel like when we play the box office game, it kills a lot of nostalgia for like better times because you're like shitty movies were always coming out.

kills a lot of nostalgia for like better times because you're like shitty movies were always coming out but there's a different type of shitty movie where you're like a studio would just make a 30 million dollar period crime thriller with like 10 good actors in it that's not a thing anymore it's not like I

I yearn for the house you know what was that HBO Max movie that everyone was raving about this is the point. It went to HBO Max. What's the movie? No Sudden Move? Yeah.

Right. No Sudden Move rules, but... Oh, it's good? Yeah. Oh, okay. But he's been very open about the fact that he's like, the exact kind of movie I want to make,

which is like adult sort of genre exercises with great actors is only going to get done at HBO Max. And it's only going to get done because I know how to make things for cheaper than anyone else. And he's just got this deal now where he's like, if I can deliver you like one movie a year with like 15 names in it and I can get it done and I'm my own DP and my own editor and this and that.

And I, I, my Dolly is a wheelchair and I get shoot it in fucking four days. They're like, yeah, whatever, go do what you want. But they all get punted to HBO Max,

which is a bummer. Number five of the box office is new this week. It's a basketball film. It's produced by Jersey Pictures. Jersey Films. It's not Blue Chips, is it? Not Blue Chips. Sort of a forgotten film. I've never seen it. I know it because of its name. It's named after a

neighborhood in Brooklyn. A neighborhood in Brooklyn? And I saw it on the list and i was like right that is a movie the basketball movie and you've never seen it never seen it sounds like it'd be in your fucking wheel sort of like a tough uh unconventional coach molds a bunch of young men you know type movie i don't think i know what this movie is the movie is called sunset park yeah i don't think i knew that was now you know, type movie. I don't think I know what this movie is. The movie is called Sunset Park. Yeah, I don't think I knew that was a thing. Now, you know, you've got some... Well, I'm going to tell you. You've got some actors you might, you know, recognize.

Well, really, just Terrence Howard. Okay. He's one of the young players on the team. I don't know. The Fredro Starr or something. I don't know the other guys. The coach is played by Rhea Perlman. Wait a second.

Who plays Phyllis Sirocco, a PE coach. David, how have I never... Who, you know, turns these kids around, I'm assuming. I cannot believe. I mean, you know I love Rhea Perlman. Who doesn't love Rhea Perlman? Well, it's produced by DeVito. Yeah, no, I know.

He gets his wife in there. I'm just looking at the poster for this now and to have like Rhea Perlman standing arms crossed next to two basketball players and the top billing on the poster

is the soundtrack. Yes. Right? Above the title is soundtrack featuring Tupac. Tupac. The Dog Pound, Queen Latifah,

Ghostface Killer. And then to have Rhea Perlman underneath that, Sunset Park, and the tagline for this movie You gotta represent How have I not seen it? How did I not produce this? I don't know much about it

Except for its name I don't think it's well regarded But it does exist Wow, Carol Kane's in it? Probably plays Rhea Perlman's best friend or sister Fuck Some other movies in the top 10 the birdcage okay movie Mike Nichols is

the birdcage they kept James and the giant peach from Henry Selleck a movie I love that I hope we cover on this podcast if Henry Selleck's new movie ever comes out yep uh the substitute that's a that's the um fuck uh Tom Barringer movie yes okay

okay uh fear fear classic Wahlberg and uh Fuck Tom Barringer movie Yes Okay Okay Fear Fear Classic Wahlberg and Witherspoon Yeah You can be afraid of me Aren't you

Let me in the fucking door Like when he does that Yeah when he When he flips out My god It is good I'm a creep Very good

I'm gonna creep on you And then An early Martin Lawrence Hit A thin line between Love and hate as the famous poster with the papyrus font. That's the one he directed.

I did it in like five minutes. Yes. Wrote and directed. Wow. Wow. With Martin Lawrence and Lynn Whitfield. Yeah. Gina King, Bobby Brown.

Real head cocked comedy face on the poster. There's a thin line between what? Yeah. So those are the hits of April, you know? April. Yeah. Two friends.

Go see it somewhere. Coming out 10 years later. New York City. Yeah. Mrs. Winterborn? Like, what the hell is that? Celtic Pride? That feels like a movie

you've seen. I've not seen it. Celtic Pride is a movie in which Daniel Stern and Dan Aykroyd are Boston Celtics fans. And they are terrified of whatever the rival team

is beating them. So they kidnap the team's star players and then they start losing games. Damon Wayans. And it's one of Apatow's first screenplay credits, right? Yes.

Yes. It's co-written by Apatow and Bill Murray has always shit on it. It's written by Apatow. Yeah. He co-wrote the story with Colin Quinn. Right.

Him and Colin Quinn were like, yeah, what would be funnier? Like a fucking Boston guy. Right. And Bill Murray's always shit on it. Cause he's like, you can't cast Danny Aykroyd as a Boston guy.

Sure. He's like a Chicago Canadian. Yeah. He is very Chicago. He's just always like, that's the worst casting I've ever seen in my entire life. Oh, he's Canadian. Danny Aykroyd?

Yeah, it's terrible. I've never seen it. Mrs. Winterborn. You know what? I'm sorry. The reason he shits on that movie, it was like an Esquire article for like their comedy issue

where they interviewed Bill Murray about the state of modern comedy and they were like, what do you think about like the new people running comedy like Judd Apatow? He's like, Judd Apatow. Didn't he write that crappy movie where he cast... He's like, new people running comedy like Judd Apatow? He's like, Judd Apatow. Didn't he write that crappy movie where he cast...

His beginning and end of Judd Apatow knowledge is like, I never got over the fact that that guy at the age of 27 wrote a script in which Dan Aykroyd played a Celtics fan. I don't know from Knocked Up. We're done. He's irredeemable in my eyes. Next week, Sweetie. Sweetie. Sort of her first real movie.

Yeah, and wild. Ben, you are going to be surprised by how wild this movie is. A lot of fun. Good movie. The only thing I can equate it to in tone is the babe movies. And it's another film about female friendship. It's got the kind of manic, cartoonish, very stylized, yeah.

I mean, family dynamics more, but still, you know, about being chaotic in your 20s. Right. I love that. So that's next week. This has been the Podcastiano. The Podcastiano. And it's fun to say, and it's only become more fun to say.

The Podcastiano. And then if we could just get a little bit of piano music to play us out. Oh, sure. I mean, that's on you, Ben and AJ. Oh, wait. Well, I actually forget that. David, we should just mention one of the great appeals of this miniseries we're about to get into. What's that?

A lot of penis coming up. I think majority. That's my... I'm not... We're going to have to count. I think a majority of these movies have dicks in them. Can I make a request? Yeah.

At the end of the miniseries, can you rate the peens? Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. We'll rank them. Thank you so much. Yeah. Yeah. I know.

I'm pretty sure Sweetie has a peen. So, we'll see. I think most of them do. Most of them got a peen. Most of them fucking do. We're going to get more than a peak this miniseries. That's right. Power of the Dog only has a peak

But there is a peak There is a peak I heard Cumberbatch was talking about giving a peak A peak Let's not fucking throw a parade over here It's a peak What are we seeing neck? Yeah exactly

You're seeing the top third Peak of the neck? Yeah exactly That's fine though I'm excited I feel like sometimes Kytel's hog i mean i'm like right it's kytel kytel's yeah you're seeing that one you're seeing that bad boy in two separate movies baby yeah i've sometimes seen people say like taking it out in like four movies but like

two campion movies i know you were mentioning babe before but i'm ready to see the that hog oink oink what were you gonna say griffin no i've sometimes seen people in the comments go like what's this thing where griffin and david like spend too much energy talking about like male actors being hot or showing dick on screen to like show that they're not like you know toxically straight no i'm like they think it's performative i'm like we talk about this a lot when the mic's all toxic these are real conversations that we have we're like did you

see that guy's dick in the movie this is not for show if anything we tone it down on mic we do we do folks thank you all

for listening to what will be our most peen filled miniseries ever and what an auspicious start David's doing the pizza box

kissing the fingers. Italian chef for the podcast. Yeah, I know. Thank you to Marie Barty for our social media, Alex Barron and AJ McCann for our editing. Hopefully they're playing some twinkly piano music underneath this. Thank you to JJ Bursch, Nick Gloriano

for our research. Joe Boehm, Pat Reynolds for our artwork. Lee Montgomery and the Great American Novel for our theme song you can still listen to extremely loud and incredibly online wherever music is found. Go to patreon.com slash blank check for blank check special features,

where of course, we are testing just how good Bustin' makes us feel over the series of months, the four Ghostbusters films. Very true. That's what we're doing. You can't stop us. You can't.

You can't. We're on our own now, as Bobby Brown would say. And you can go to blankies.reddit.com for some real nerdy shit. Tune in next week for Sweetie. And you know, I just want to for some real nerdy shit. Tune in next week for Sweetie. And then, you know, I just want to say

really some nerdy shit. Check in from time to time. It gets really nerdy. Yeah, but it's cool. I love it. Love to see it. I like that we've created

a safe space where people can freak out over like, new poster just dropped. Let's analyze this billing block. It fucking rules. It's great.

And get in on it. It's like, people are really positive fucking rules. It's great. Yeah. And get in on it. It's like people are really like positive and supportive. I'll say Ghostbusters Afterlife billing is fucking weird and it's very different than

what's on the posters. Yeah. Yeah. It's weird. Slimer. And Slimer. Can I say this? The movie will have

been out for months at this point. Oh yeah. But you haven't seen it Dave and I have. Yeah. Slimer is fully not in it. No Slimer.

One of the better decisions. That new blue fucker. Muncher. Yeah. Muncher. But you know who is in it? Fucking everyone else. Yeah, everyone else.

They showed restraint in not bringing Slimer back, and they brought every other fucking That marshmallow fucker. Of course, right? Yeah, I knew it. Ben. Knew it. Do you know what they do? Let's not talk about it.

It's like a bag of marshmallows. There's like 80 of them and they're tiny. They're little minions. I do like when things are a lot. Oh, you like multiple. Right, sure. A horde. You hate little things.

You hate little things. There's a bunch of them together. They never stack up on top of each other and become a bigger thing though. You hate little things. What? You hate little things. There's a bunch of them together. It's a horde, Griffin. They never stack up on top of each other and become a bigger thing, though. That would have been fun. That would have been good. I'm almost surprised that they didn't do that either. I don't know.

Listen, we'll spend too much time talking about that dog shit movie over on Patreon. Pay $5 if you want to hear me rag on a movie that gave me an existential crisis. And as always... Thank you. What? I'm thanking you

for getting back on track. And as always, you're welcome. It's nice to see the two friends. That's what we all do. Maybe we weren't first, but we did it best.

Oh, you want a moment. I want a moment. You need a moment i want a moment i need a moment now i want just a but david just said hit record joe i know he did my name isn't joe no it's ben that's why i need a moment to recalibrate i didn't know what to call you but but we don't have to include any of this take your time i don't know