Blank Check with Griffin & David - Watch With Us LIVE! - Revenge Of The Podcast

Episode Date: November 30, 2015

Griffin and David, joined once again by director George Lucas, present a special live bonus episode where they watched the Revenge of the Sith and recorded their commentary. Includes amazing past guests, fan favorite segments, plenty of Georgie Porgie attempting to justify these terrible movies, and of course, Griffin and David trying to make sense of it all. So hit play and listen along in real time. Recorded at Union Hall in Brooklyn, NY.

🎵 Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello, everybody. I am Griffin. I'm David Sims. Welcome to Griffin and David present Revenge of the Podcast live. Thank you for joining us here at Union Hall. This excellent night as we prepare to watch, I think I can speak for both of us, Rental the Sith for our last time. Yeah, we're gonna, I'll never see this movie again. This is the last time.

The 11th and last time. I've used both of my drink tickets already because that's the only state I want to watch this movie in. I don't know if everyone's caught up with the podcast we released an episode today in which we had the guest, I mean the big guest we've been aiming for.

From the beginning of this exploration of three films, trying to figure out what these movies are about. We finally got the white whale, we got George Lucas on the show, so I want to bring him out because he's agreed to do the commentary as well. Before I do, I think we need to bring out, I mean, really the hero. Yep.

You want to trade him off? He is, you might know him as producer Ben. Maybe Purdue or Ben. Maybe Ben Ducer. Poet laureate. The Haas. Hello Fennel.

The Peeper. Is that it? The Tiebreaker. The Tiebreaker. There's one more you added. Mr. Positive. Mr. Positive. And the poet laureate.

I said the poet laureate. Everybody please. Welcome to the stage producer Ben Hosley aka producer Ben Hosley aka producer Ben Kenobi that was the recent one that was made up Ben how are you feeling

I am not happy to be watching this again I hate this movie it sucks but I don't know I'm glad that a bunch of people came out to watch so that's cool you were positive about this show this afternoon yeah and then I showed up then you showed up I came into the bar bunch of people came out to watch, so that's cool. You were positive about the show this afternoon. Yeah. Then I showed up.

I came into the bar, and the first words he said to me were, I'm so angry. Yes, because nothing was figured out. You guys didn't plan this. So I had to figure it out. So thanks a lot. Appreciate it. It's a great night so far. And ladies and gentlemen,

without further ado, I'd like to bring to the stage the mastermind, the architect, the genius. You want to list his credits? Sure. He directed THX 1138.

Great movie. American Graffiti. Love that movie. We just found out there was a rough draft in early... Yeah, some 70s movie. He test screened a movie

in 1977 called Star Wars A New Hope The Special Edition is the title that he gave us. He can explain. Apparently, he 1977 called Star Wars A New Hope the Special Edition is the title. I don't know. He can explain. Apparently he made three Star Wars movies that weren't released until later but I mean the main reason we're all here tonight is of course the Phantom Mask trilogy. The Phantom Mask, Attack of the Clones, Revenge of the Sith. Ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the stage Academy Award nominee George Lucas. Thank you, George, for being here.

Welcome, George. Oh, complete with lightsaber. You brought your own... Complete with tiny lightsaber. You got a chode of a lightsaber there. That's how you use it. Okay. Well, we got a stupid long movie to watch, so let's just start it without further ado.

Let's get this over with. Come on, Ben. George, I mean, this is a rare opportunity you have. It's a public screening of the film with an audience here of rabid fans. Is there any context you want to give them for how to view this film? Do you like great movies? Okay, George.

That answer will dictate how you feel about this. Okay, so if you're listening at home, this is a 20th Century Fox logo. Yeah, we are recording this. Recording this. This is an audio commentary that you can listen to at home. Last time you'll hear this fanfare

before a Star Wars movie. Really? So that fanfare is off? It's gone. Wow, that's incredible. When you wish upon a star. Okay, now, credit where credit's due, I like this part.

This part's good. This part's really good. And this. Cool. Super cool. I like the subtit this part's good this part's really good cool super cool I like the subtitle too I do too there's subtitles so everyone can

well that font can be hard to read because the bends a little are you gonna are you gonna do maybe yeah okay

so episode three Revenge of the Sith I mean if people are watching along with the movie, they can read this. War! It's an exciting way to start a movie.

Yeah, I like the exclamation point that early on. Evil is everywhere, George. Yep. No, you lead with Count Dooku. You mentioned Count Dooku plays heavily into this first paragraph. I justified the text, but it leaves some big spaces sometimes. Like between Lord and Count and Dooku. I think you also use a

two period rather than a three period ellipsis at one point. Were you given a character limit that you had to hit for this crawl? Because it feels like you were trying to hit three periods. No, this is an indie movie. Indie movies are creator controlled. I don't have some studio executive

looking over my shoulder. It's four periods. Yeah, that's a tip forward. It's a little sneak peek of episode four. That was a conscious choice. One for each episode that I would direct. That is incredible. So you directed four. You're saying you didn't direct the other ones?

Which ones? The ones you made in the 70s or whatever. Well, I test screened New Hope in 77. Then we did test screenings of Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi, and then we released all three in one year. They weren't finished until the 90s. Yeah, in 1997. Yeah. Oh, great opening

shot. I mean, at this point, a little played out, though. You used the same opening shot. Well, it's the ring theory. Read that website. Oh, great. Everything's mirrored. Whoa, where'd those ships come from? Looks great. It's from underneath,. Whoa, where'd those ships come from? Looks great. It's from underneath, though.

Little surprise. At us. With the cameras from underneath? Oh, usually, yes. Usually it's from underneath. So is there any symbolism to that? I like stuff that goes fast. Okay. I'm so glad we got him.

Me too. This is great. Look at that. These are the kind of explanations I was waiting for. You couldn't do this any other way other than digitally. It's amazing. You're telling me you're not wowed by that? Look at that. These are the kind of explanations I was waiting for. You couldn't do this any other way other than digitally. It's amazing. You're telling me you're not wowed by that? Look at that.

It's amazing. I mean, honestly, I have a little bit of a headache already. Well, evil is everywhere. It's a traumatic time. Headache is a good response. So I've got to get into it. Your big argument for a lot of your creative decisions is that anything we don't like was intentional. No.

That these movies are not like like was intentional. No. That's a coincidence. It's a coincidence that the parts that you think you don't like are just parts where I designed you should have a bad feeling because as the famous joke goes, I have a bad feeling about this. It's built into the fabric of the movies.

There's our first line of dialogue. Lock on to them, R2. How's the volume here? Is the movie too loud? Are we too quiet? This is housekeeping because we've got a long way to go. I want to make sure everyone... Look at these things. I love these. This is a collaborative experience.

Okay, now, Vulture Droids. We have accused these characters, if we can even call them that, of being craven creations creation solely to sell toys. Can you tell me what the story impetus was for the vulture droids? Well, first of all, kids love toys. I don't think it's a bad motive.

No, I'm sorry I created a character that was so cool that they made a toy out of it. I think it's the buzz droids that are really annoying. They're coming up. This is where the fun begins. That's intentional. I put that line really annoying. They're coming up. This is where the fun begins. That's intentional. I put that line there because that is literally where the real fun of the movie begins. So we're not supposed to be having fun up until this point?

That's your actual goal? You have your characters constantly describing how much fun they're having, just in case we're not getting it. Well, my movies appeal to both smart people and stupid people. So I sometimes put a little gift in for someone who doesn't know this is supposed to be fun. Now, here's the thing I've harped on in past episodes. When they cut to this clone commander here, his helmet is entirely CGI. That is a real human being with a CGI helmet put over his face, which is why the light hits it in weird ways.

Looks better. Is that your honest argument, that that looks better than buying a physical helmet and putting it on a guy's head? Well, you noticed it. I don't think we'd be talking about it if it looked like some shitty practical helmet. Well, I think that's the goal. I shouldn't be taken out of the scene to, I mean, creative decisions. I told you, I came on too hard on the podcast. I'm going to try to temper my emotions here.

He's our friend. He's here with us tonight. He's our friend. See how many no's I put there? Five no's? That's a call forward That word's going to be important later in the film I planted a lot of times where people said the word no

So that later on I don't want to spoil it in case this is the first viewing for anyone But the word no is key to this movie You've said no is your least favorite word Thank you And that's why I put the word no in this movie so many times Because this is the low point. This is the tragedy, bad things.

I got corndogs. Am I going to not eat dinner? What are you talking about? Okay, so our only, yeah. We've got to eat on mic. That's what our fans want. Yeah. I was actually, I will say I was disappointed that the phrase flying is for droids didn't catch on.

I kind of put that in there thinking people would start saying that. Maybe put it on t-shirts maybe. Now these are the buzz droids. These are the toy droids. Look at these things. Adorable but also sinister. And he's going to say hit the center eye.

Oh, look what they did. That's brutal. That is. That shows I have balls. That's what I was willing to do. George, can I ask you what is an instance in where you thought,

imagined that a person would use that phrase in everyday conversation? Like if someone didn't want to fly on an airplane? Yeah. Like people who are afraid of flying could say, I'll drive, I don't want to take an airplane. Flying is for droids. They liked it. Your plan was for that phrase to be used anytime someone didn't like being... Yeah, like right now there's a travel advisory until February 24th because of terrorism.

So if you don't want to fly, but you want a fun catchphrase, you don't want to be brought down by the real world topic of fear of a massive attack, say flying us for droids kind of lightens a serious moment. Hold on, Anakin. You're going to get us both killed. You can only use it if you think. No, no. I was just quoting what was just said in the movie.

You should be watching the movie, Griffin, rather than eating on Mike. I've seen this like nine times. He's going to say it. That line? Is that the big line he was going to say? Watch out. It's the most dramatically inert fight. There you go.

There's a massive difference in the amount of danger Obi-Wan seems to be in, in terms of his performance. He's ready for death. Yeah, he's scared. He says, like, go on without me, it's over. Yeah. He's going to get killed by some buzz droids. Anakin seems to be treating this

with the seriousness of buying soup at a grocery store. Was that a conscious, did you direct Hayden in that direction? Flatter. Flatter. I said, Hayden, less. The camera sees everything. I mean, I gotta give you... There it is. Hilarious joke.

Most successful joke in the history of humor. The most successful joke in the history of humor the most successful joke in the history of humor made more money than any other single joke that's owned by a one how do you rank

how much money a joke makes well how many of the best biggest selling movies of all time is it in exclusively

do you consider yourself a humorist George no yes I do but not exclusively a satirist look at this yeah it's a thrilling sequence. I'm a storyteller, first and foremost. Once again, they look completely unafraid. Yep.

None of this was real. I made all of this up. I mean, yeah, that's how movies work. Yeah, that's how movies work. No, but I mean, this doesn't exist somewhere. We didn't have to tear this down at the end. Just turn off the computer. So was that the argument, that it was more eco-friendly to not build sets? Yeah, it's completely green. Every other movie, they've got to burn all the wood when they're done. Is that what they do?

They burn the sets? Yeah, if they don't need them anymore. I mean, you should have seen the dumpsters at the end of this movie were just empty. They were just like people. They came by and said, no trash? I'm like, no, it's all digital. Here's one of your most famous creatures. General Grievous. Can you talk to us a little about the creation of Grievous?

He's wearing a coat because he's cold, because robots get cold. Did you notice that the whole crowd went silent? That character scares the shit out of people. He's imposing. Especially a sm out of people. He's imposing. Especially a smoker's cop. That's right. Oh, these guys, their bubbles are so great stuff.

How many times have you seen this movie, George? I mean, I couldn't count. I've seen it. I probably see it once a week. And do you love it just as much every time? Yeah, probably more. So this is the most you've ever liked this movie by that much? Yeah, probably.

It's my favorite screening so much. I mean, you guys are talking a lot, but that's okay. But there's a crowd, a laughing crowd. That's right. They love it. Laughter is one of the most positive human responses you can have. So this is where Elevator Annex is going to go. This is where Elevator Annex, I don't know if you guys have is where Elevator Antics went up. I don't know if you guys have heard the Elevator Antics episode.

Okay, so R2 has a lot of comedy in this movie. I love how R2 has to hold a cell phone in his little... He's a robot. He doesn't have it built in. They couldn't bake that in. R2's got a lot of personality. He could do it that way, but he prefers it that way. It's tactile.

He prefers to be able to dial the numbers with his little... With his little sort of plastic... R2-D2's always been a character who just dances to the beat of his own drummer, you know? Okay, so this is a great example of that. R2's trying to help them get the elevator up the cat. He holds it up to his mouth as if they'll understand what he's saying when he talks into it. He doesn't hold it up to his ear.

Which we know that they can't understand what R2-D2 is saying, because C-3PO's a character that only exists so that he can translate R2-D2. They don't know how to interpret his beat. If he put it away, they wouldn't notice him. There's a lot of logical flaws, George. No, those aren't logical flaws to interpret his feet. If he put it away, they wouldn't notice him. There's a lot of logical flaws, George.

No, those aren't logical flaws. People are imperfect. They make mistakes. I mean, in the world of the movie, not me. He's a robot. Yeah, he's a robot, but he's got personality. That's why we love him. That's why we love R2.

See? Droids have personality. They're not just machines. So there's like two more hours of this yeah yeah oh okay maybe 210

you know oh boy that was a digital effect thanks for coming by everyone no that was a digital effect that last thing you pointed out that was a digital effect is this digital right here

yeah it's all digital but that last one but you used oil that wasn't real oil you didn't shoot real oil no I'm not Exxon I'm not gonna spill a bunch of oil everywhere

I tell you it's all green. If you like the planet, you'll love these movies. Not real fire either. That's an effect. That's an effect. It's just seamless, George. George, this is something we've debated in the past. R2 does not fly at all in the Phantom Mass.

In Attack of the Clones, he flies only when it's convenient for him, but not when everyone else is slowing down their pace so that they can keep up with him. And in this one, he flies to burn some droids to death. Is R2 capable of flying at any point in time? Yeah, can he fly all the time? You ever seen a bird

walking around? Rarely. It's a great answer. And you wonder why is that bird walking around? He could fly everywhere? It's because people do what they want. Do birds walk 90% of the time? Griffin, you're missing Count Dooku. He's showing up. It's a comparison. I'm not saying he's a bird.

I'm just saying everyone's different. Count Dooku is the second line in your opening. Yeah. And this is the only one where he flubbers onto the ground. I was going to make a joke and say that he really did that, but of course, he was a very old man. He was like 88. Yeah.

It was impressive. Now, you let Dooku get away at the end of Attack of the Clones. Yeah, it was very important that he get away at the end of episode two so we could have this scene. This pivotal scene. You get 90 seconds. I mean, they're all pivotal. Every scene is pivotal. Every scene is pivotal.

Every scene is pivotal. Do you think there's no fat on this movie? Do you watch this and you don't think there's anything you should have cut in hindsight 10 years out? No, I should have added stuff, if anything. Like elevator antics? Well, you probably will eventually. No, I can't.

Disney owns them. I just got to live with the money. I forgot about that deal. How much money was that again? A billion dollars. That's a bad guy. Christopher Lee is really good. I don't know if it's just

we're in the pocket for him. No, we're so in the pocket for him. He's just so classy. Yeah, now this is... You kind of want him to win. Yeah, and this is also, this is when the movie's cooking. He's the only character

who seems alive on screen, in my opinion, you know? Griffin, don't you want to ask me? Oh, that's... Don't you want to ask me why Ben Kenobi doesn't fly everywhere since he just flew across the room? Why doesn't Ben Kenobi fly everywhere

because he can fly across the room? No, I was making fun of you. Okay, and I'm genuinely asking, if he could fly all the time, what wouldn't he do? Dooku threw him across the room. No, I was making fun of you. Okay, and I'm genuinely asking. He flew across because Dooku threw him across the room just now. That's why. So he wasn't flying. See, he's killing this scene. Yeah, no, this is a really good close-up.

Take note in the subtitles for this. Every now and then I will merge two words together in the subtitles. Like, but you are two words. But in the subtitles for this. Every now and then I will merge two words together in the subtitles. Like, but you are two words. But in the subtitle there it was but you, one word. So you consciously, that was, you had to hand over the subtitles for the entire film? George, this movie is incredibly violent. Yeah, now this is gross.

You always say this movie is for children. The man just got his hands cut. Good, Anakin, good. And the reason I put that line in there as part of it. Palpatine's best line is coming up Thank you You're welcome I should

This is the Do it Do it Gross Decapitation head rolling Head rolling I regret cutting a line from that scene What was the line that you had in originally Do it! Gross. Decapitation. Head rolling. Head rolling. I regret cutting a line from that scene.

What was the line that you had in originally? Well, someone talked me into cutting the line. Dooku's final line was, But me suck out Dooku. Oh, my God. And, man, what I wouldn't give to add that. Because you see how it's closed up on his face. He looks right at the camera and goes, But me suck out Do count dooku now george why would he say that at that moment just for fun i thought it'd

be funny joke lighten the mood it's a dark scene yeah he knows sand people sometimes they call him tuscan raiders because sand people sounds offensive so i i stuck to my guns on that i said no it's another universe you can use a phrase, sand people. It's not offensive, even in this day and age. Oh, so this is a bad guy. He's a bad guy. He can say whatever he wants. I wish he'd said more things that were problematic.

He thinks they should just abandon Obi-Wan. He's got his leg caught on something. More battles, more Star Wars. Grievous is so cool you talk a lot about taking inspiration from old cinema, silent cinema sci-fi serials what were your inspirations for Grievous? I went to a nursing home once

visited a sick relative it scared the shit out of me I thought, nothing's scarier than a dying old man you realize your own mortality so that what if we make the bad guy really look like

sickly I wanted people to feel like at any moment our heroes could catch whatever Grievous has so in your mind... So what is it, like bronchitis? Is it worse?

We don't know because it's set in outer space. There wouldn't be a name for it that you would understand. Also, he's a robot. That doesn't matter. That's offensive. That's all droids. The ship's going this way so they can walk up it, I guess.

Why wouldn't he fly at that moment? He should probably fly. So, yeah, the ship's going this way so they can walk up it, I guess. R2's sliding. Why wouldn't he fly at that moment? Yeah, he should probably fly. He's hurt. You ever see a bird get hurt? They don't fly. They lie on the ground. So you drove to like birds.

He was screaming. Now he's sliding. He knows that's fast. Now, you originally were in talks with Academy Award nominee Gary Oldman, one of the finest living actors to play the voice of Grievous, and instead chose to hire Matthew Wood, your sound supervisor, on the film. Yeah, it was a close call. Did they both audition?

Yeah, I kept saying, Oldman, just do a little less. And Oldman, I felt like, I mean, no disrespect, he's great he was in my buddy Francis' movie Dracula and I thought he was great in that oops so you thought Oldman was doing too much yeah I said we gotta go with Wood on this one

because I gotta say Wood playing Grievous is giving maybe the most performance I've ever heard you didn't think that was overkill? and it's very Dracula-like well I didn't want people to think it was Dracula that was overkill? And it's very Dracula-like. Very Dracula-like. Yeah. Well, I didn't want people to think it was Dracula. That was actually one thing I thought. They're going to think it's Dracula.

This is a great moment. Just a quiet moment. We've had a lot of loud... This is the first really quiet moment in the movie. It's flying then. Okay. That's stupid idiot. I was worried people would think that he was saying Roy Shields the man who did the music for the Little Rascals movies that was an actual

concern of yours you thought that everyone watching this film a film predominantly made for children would take it out of the film I was worried that they would think we were going to cut to a decomposing future because it would be

the future. I thought it was a long time ago, George. Yeah, I know, but if they activated Roy Shields, that would have been a 20th century film composer. Now, the Destroyer droids have been in all three films, but are used sparingly, whereas the main battle droids, who are made out of rice paper and walk like babies with dirty diapers, are used top to bottom.

Is there a reason the Galactic Republic isn't using... I love all the use of green. I love the use of General Grievous. His favorite color is green. Yeah, puke green everywhere. Is there a reason, though, within the reality of the film that destroyer droids are used so sparingly when they seem to be a lot more advanced?

They use a lot more energy. So it's like a carbon concern. No, it has to do with, like, we want to use them sparingly because we don't want to drain all the batteries. I've already mentioned batteries once in this film. So you're saying within the reality of the movie, the destroyer droids have to be charged? Yeah, it's like when you're running a program on your computer or your phone and you know it drains the battery.

So you're like, I only use it when I need to. Great. You don't think that power... Are you happy with that explanation? No, so the destroyer droids are the Tinder of the Star Wars universe is what you're saying. I don't know what that is. I'm a married man. I love that line reading. That's a great line reading.

And this time, you won't escape. They're so close to defeating him right here. We could have saved like 40 minutes of plot. I thought Grievous had them because he had put the lightsabers in his pocket in a jacket that he's wearing. He's got cape pockets. You know those famous cape pockets that everyone has? So secure.

How much of this is real, George? It's all digital. Yeah. I think, I don't know if I'm misremembering this, but I think there was a shot earlier of Palpatine saying, come now, and he's kind of bending over and wincing. I think someone made like a sex gif of that

online. You think someone made a sex joke with that? Yeah, people do sex, sexy Star Wars gifs. So if you look to that point in the movie, that's where someone, I think, did make a gif, or if they haven't, they probably will. Well, I mean,

you know, George, on that subject, we have a checkered history in the past of this podcast. There are a few things I do. Do you see the way he jumped? Do you see the way Grievous jumped there? No, how did he jump? And then Anakin jumps the same way. That's kind of a predictive move.

You see, like, he's already jumping like the bad guy. So you're foreshadowing that he's going to become a bad guy? A different bad guy. Because all bad guys jump the same? Do you think Osama bin Laden and Hitler jumped the same way? Probably. I don't know. I never met them.

But I know in the Star Wars universe, bad guys jump the same way. George, you mentioned sex gifts. Yeah. And sex memes. Yeah. We have a checkered past on this podcast. I love the way that they run. Griffin's setting up a bed, I think.

You love this movie so much. It's great. Every, every, so far, every second's better than the last one. Do you think it's...

Oh, look at that. Do you see the way he wiggles his... The hand work on him. Those aren't real. That's all... I made this. So how much...

How hands-on are you in giving notes to the animators? Are you the hand model for that scene? I'll say, have him wiggle his hands. Are you acting out, though, and telling them to copy what you're doing? Do it like this. Move your hands like that.

He's a bad guy. How you doing, Ben? Oh, man. Ben, what's your favorite part so far, Ben? The oil stuff. Great. We talked about that earlier. Don't say that.

Did you think it was real oil? No, of course not. None of this is real. Yeah, but it's amazing because it looks real. Have you seen things in your real life that look like this, George? No, because I don't live in a space adventure. Do you wish you lived in a space adventure? I'm glad I haven't seen anything like this.

I don't want to be in a volcano. Yeah, I've seen stuff like this on the news. It's horrible. Griffin, you were trying to set up a bit there? I was trying to set up a bit. What are you setting up? Sex memes? Star Wars sex gifs?

Sex memes. I have, in the past, we've done ten episodes for each of these prequel films, these Phantom Mass Trilogy films, and when we're sort of running dry of things to talk about, I often sink to talking about fan fiction. Right. And the fan fiction often happens to be erotic in nature. I don't know if you're familiar with this, but a lot of people write...

Yeah, I don't like it. You don't like it? It's people drawing inspiration from your work. I know, but I've't like it. You don't like it? It's people drawing inspiration from your work. I know, but I've never liked it. My employees traditionally have known not to bring up stuff like that to me. I don't think it's funny or fun. And they can't say your least favorite word to you. No.

That's it, right? Yeah. You don't like the word no. I don't like it. That's why I use it in this, because this is the darkest movie probably anyone's ever going to make. You think this is the darkest? Yeah. He just said it, Griff.

Okay. Name a darker one. Schindler's List. Okay, but he's my friend. Of course, Steve's going to make one that matches it. Oh, you're right. It wasn't dark because it was your friend who made it. No, but it's not fair to bring up my friend's movie.

We both make good movies. Of course, Steve made that. This is my Schindler's List. You're a remarkable man, George. A lot of people die in this movie. Yeah. And they shouldn't have. Tell me that's not Griffin. This is Coruscant. Don't belittle the deaths in this movie just because they're

fake. This is Coruscant. The whole planet's a city. We still haven't gotten to the bottom of this. How does this planet work? It's a city planet. Yeah, but what's the infrastructure? I don't get it. The whole planet's made of city. It's like the Tin Man in The Wizard of Oz. He started off as a

woodsman and then he was cursed by the Wicked Witch, I believe, of the East because he was in love with the... This is going off topic a little bit. In the original Baum books for Wizard of Oz, the Tin Woodsman was just a regular woodsman. He fell in love with a munchkin girl

who worked for the Wicked Witch of the East. She put a curse on him and made him chop his arm off. He went to a tinsmith and placed the arm with a tin arm. So it was piece by piece. Piece by piece until he was eventually all tin. That's why he needed a heart, because he was all tin. That's the way Coruscant

was as a planet. It was once a wood planet? No, it was once just a regular planet. Okay, please don't. This is a serious topic. I respect your question. I'm giving you an answer. This isn't goofing around. We're watching episode three here. It's true. But eventually it became all city

and none of the original planet was left. It had all been... Citified. Yeah, citified. Pillars. Guys, it's the pillars. Oh, great. George, in your mind,

this is your favorite part of the film, David, is the pillars. The pillars. But also, if I'm not mistaken, I believe that woman over... How many pillars? If I'm not mistaken, George, is the woman over the shoulder palpatine not one of your daughters?

That's your daughter. That's one of your daughters, I believe. I love her. You love her? Yeah. And that was based on Weird Al Yankovic in his fat video. That other alien. It's kind of a little tip of the hat.

What's his name again? Ornfrey Tom? Yeah, that's right. Yeah. That's a little tip of the hat. I can't believe we know that. I know everything. Hey!

3PO. So many pillars. There's smits. Yeah. There's our main man. Hey hat. I can't believe we know that. I know everything. Hey! 3PO. So many pillars. There's Smiths. Yeah. There's our main man. We'll give it up for Smiths. Jimmy Smiths, people. Let's get a little red carpet.

Well, that's why I did. I rolled out the red carpet for him. That's a little nod to how much we like Jimmy Smiths. You rolled out the red carpet. Yeah, it's like, oh, he'll like this. George, you said you never found the fan fiction funny, but did you find it sexy? I mean, that was the intended purpose. He's got something on his phone, people.

I don't know if I have anything. I don't know if I have anything. Let me just say this, and I'm proud of this. In every Star Wars movie I've ever made, C-3PO has two golden arms. And that's the way it should be. Now, this is the first, like, romantically charged moment in the film. They're neck kissing. Wow.

I promised David that I wouldn't read any fan fiction tonight. That was a promise I made for the sake of the podcast. I don't remember you making that promise, but thank you. I made that promise

to you off mic. Well, this is a moment for it because this is so hot. This scene is just really sexy stuff. And that's why it's good that I created an out because I didn't promise

that someone else wouldn't read fan fiction. Can you talk about outer rim edges there? Can we get Rachel Lang to the stage? Past guest of the podcast, Rachel Lang. The only person who actually...

Are we pausing the movie for this? No, we're going straight through. You kidding me? There's two and a half hours of this. We gotta pause the movie. This is the sexiest part. No, it gets sexier. You talked about the outer rim edges, Dave.

You understand what I mean? She's trembling. She's trembling. Of course she is. She's trembling. Someone's trembling. Okay, Rachel. You guys, I just want you to know that producer Ben just told me I'll feed it to you out there

about this mic. It's getting in the mood. Setting it up. Setting it up. Well, welcome. And now I'm stuck, so I'll just stand right here. So season one, I read some Obi-Wan Qui-Gon fan fiction in which Obi-Wan performed fellatio on Qui-Gon Jinn through a smear-loy hole.

You're so lucky I don't own Star Wars anymore. I would have sued you back to a long time ago. Didn't write it, just read it. Season two, I read some Padme Anakin stuff. So I felt that well had sort of been tapped dry. So I tried to find something different. I found a short story that Rachel's going to read called Love Knows No Circuits. And I will be dramatically playing the role of C-3PO.

I do have a question. Are you going to be playing the role of R2 as well? Because there are some R2 lines. I will, yes. All right, great. And one more question. Do you want to read the commentary at the beginning? I will.

Love Knows No Circuits by Sapadu. How long are you going to do this for, Griffin? Five hours. This was a challenge fic that I issued to Amies, the Elvish Lady. It sort of dot dot dot backfired on me, though. Dot dot dot. Nervous laugh. You wrote that out? Yep. Challenge writer, Yowie. Feel free to nervously laugh, people. With R2-D2 and C-3PO as a couple.

R2, I don't care what you say. I'm not cooking. We don't need food anyway, and Master Luke says he's perfectly fine making his own meals for himself. C-3PO squawked in indignation. R2 made a low whining sound, which made C-3PO jump.

Aww. What in heaven's name do you mean a romantic night for the two of us? He snorted, turning on his metallic heels and starting to wobble away when R2 rolled up alongside Threepio, effectively blocking him from going any further. The astromech droid knew very well that Threepio was just trying to play hard to get and R2 wasn't going to stand for it. Dot, dot, dot. Even if he didn't really stand. That's a joke, George. I'm sorry. I watched the movie.

George, you pay attention to this. Did you intend 3PO and R2 to be romantically involved? Is that a sort of sub-uncertain? No, they're friends. They're friends. They're just buddies. For one thing, it's not normal for droids to have feelings at all. For their masters, perhaps. Certainly not for each other.

For another, I'm programmed for protocol etiquette. It simply isn't proper for such behaviors. Why, in human beings, it's practically considered a mental disease. 3PO humphed to R2's protests. The golden droid did almost trip when R2 brought up the subject of their master's mate. But that is an entirely different subject. Master Anakin has very good sense of these matters and is not our place to question. Threepio replied curtly, ignoring the ten-year age difference between the two humans in question.

How long is this script? Five pages. R2 accused his counterpart with a series of clicks and beeps. If 3PO could have, he would have flushed. I'm going to do the beep on this one. Can you read the translation, Rachel? I like it better the other way, but okay. I must admit, it looked rather good.

Thank you. R2 added. Threepio rounded on R2 in a mock rage. Oh, stop it, you clanging, spluttering bucket of bolts. Threepio demanded, slamming one of his metal arms down on R2's domed top, which R2 accused Threepio. Wife-beater! And with that,

the silver and blue astromech droid spun and rolled away, knowing full well that 3PO would follow him. Now, R2, don't be like that. Come back. I didn't mean it. 3PO protested, chasing after his counterpart, his arms flailing. You know I love you. R2 spun around to face 3PO again. This is a pretty sexy moment, George. R2 asked. 3PO started to sputter again.

Well, quite technically, that is anatomically impossible2 asked. 3PO started to sputter again. Well, I, quite technically, that is anatomically impossible with arts. 3PO defended himself. R2 snorted. Kiss? He insisted. 3PO sighed and bent over at his waist, scraping the part of his mechanical, humanoid face that would have been a mouth over the spot on R2's dome that he had

smacked. Such was their version of a kiss. Around the corner of the doorway, Luke Skywalker, I mean, Anakin Skywalker and his lover were spying on the two droids. The younger of the two obviously finding the whole affair hilarious beyond all reason. And on the floor, laughing.

I don't know who that is. I don't either. I think it was a typo. If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I never would have believed it. Anakin Skywalker muttered. Two great eyes smiled up at him from the floor. Hate to say I told you so, but I told you so. His lover said, still grinning, Anakin grinned back.

Indeed you did. Kiss? Mission. Mind-blowing success. Yes, this did get written in five minutes. Yes, I was up until my alarm clock read midnight. Yes, I am insane. That is how they end the story that they wrote.

Thank you, Rachel Lang. That's it. Thank you, Rachel. Sorry about that. We got the fan fiction over with. I didn't read anything graphic. Yeah, that was actually very chase. Thank you.

Yeah, they were just kissing. I've learned lessons. I don't want to be a dirty boy my whole life. I want to grow up. This is a pretty dirty sequence. While you were talking about it, you missed one of the sexiest canon shots in the whole Star Wars saga.

Anakin's bare chest. Anakin wakes up from a nightmare, which was very well directed. Very Lynchian. Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, yeah, that's the kind of stuff I would have let him do in Return of the Jedi. You don't know about, you guys don't know.

David Lynch? David Lynch was going to direct that, but he didn't want to. Did he explain why he didn't want to? I don't know. I mean, he didn't tell me. He's a good guy. So you directed the episode four. Yeah.

And then five and six you did not direct? Well, i basically directed return of the jedi because richard marquand uh got very sick he basically turned in an assembly edit and i finished it while he died you're a cold man george what why i'm just supposed to leave it unfinished it's that what happened chronologically, you made those films first. We've now come to understand. And I released them a year before, or two years before

Episode 1 came out. And then Phantom Ass you directed, Attack of the Clones you directed, Revenge of the Sith you directed. What's your favorite? I can't choose. It's a four-way tie. Second place goes to Return of the Jedi.

This and third goes to Empire Strikes Back. You guys are... It's the ones you didn't direct. I get it. No, but Return of the Jedi is really great. Well, I can't wait

to watch it. Yeah. I will believe it when I see it. Look, yourself, you. Someone, you. That's because that's Yoda. That's how Yoda speaks.

George, was there a reason you stepped away from directing episodes 5 and 6 but came back for the prequels what made you leave and what made you

come back I want to ask well I mean ultimately I was in charge of the final cuts of all of the movies

but the problem was I was trying to get independence so I could make these movies the way I the reason the prequels are flawless is because they're independent movies they're independently financed

I had Final Cut on them I had a lot of people telling me no on episode 4 your least favorite word yeah I don't like that word when it was time to make the second one that I made,

episode five, I kind of had to, I took my eye off the ball a little bit and they did some goofy things that I'm not proud of. You know. Goofier than Jar Jar?

What kind of goofiness? They did improv stuff in it that they added jokes in that I didn't like. I don't want to spoil it because you guys haven't seen it yet. Let's not talk about those movies. Come on, Griffin.

Okay, fair enough. We're talking about this movie. I mean, basically, I'm not perfect. I mean, the best you can say about me is I made five and a half perfect Star Wars movies, and I think that's a pretty good track record. This scene's great. Just electric.

So do you like your Jedis to always just have arms crossed, looking at the floor, not even looking at each other? This scene's great. Just electric. So, do you like your Jedis to always just have arms crossed, looking at the floor, not even looking at each other, really? Standard pose. Yeah, I love it. Shot, reverse shot. Yeah. I will say the visual language of these movies is very consistent. Thank you. Lee Bad.

Yeah. Well, you know, as my rest in peace Michael Jackson that I helped make Captain EO, he used to say the word bad and he meant good or cool. So when people in these movies say I have a bad feeling about this, they're really saying I have a cool feeling about this? Yeah, sometimes. Certainly, that's the meta. That's sort of like the inside joke of that joke.

It's like I have a bad feeling about this, but also this being the most successful joke in the history of humor, I have a cool feeling about how often and successful this joke will be. So that's just... The characters mean bad in the traditional sense. They mean bad in the traditional sense.

And you as the writer mean cool. This is a long time before Michael Jackson did that to that word. Well, it's a long time ago, yeah. A long time ago. And it was also so far away. Galaxy, far, far away. I just want to point out, this movie Jackson did that to that word. Well, it's a long time ago, yeah. A long time ago. And it was also so far away. Galaxy, far, far away. I just want to point out, this movie just grinds to a halt.

It just literally, it's just people in rooms talking to each other for an hour. Look, he's appointing him to be his personal representative on the Jedi Council. I know, there's a lot of parliamentary business to attend to. Well, how are we going to set, right now, we're putting the pieces in place. You've had three movies to putting the pieces in place. You've had three movies to put the pieces in place. Yeah, I know, but this opened with a giant kick-ass battle and now we've got to

take a pause. And now it's, what's going to happen next? What's going to happen next for an hour? This is the Jedi temple, right? This is the Jedi temple. Those pillars represent the five great Star Wars movies. Now, George, this is a question I've always had.

I've been trying to figure this out throughout all the films. What relationship does the Jedi Council and the Jedis at large have to the galaxy around them? Are they sort of like the Vatican? Like they're their own independent state? They work in conjunction with other people, but they don't answer to anybody? Or is there someone they report to?

They have a higher midichlorian count than anybody else. I know what they are. I'm asking... Here's my question. Are the guys who are holograms, are they sitting in corresponding chairs elsewhere? Do they have to sit in a chair to talk to everyone else? Aren't there that many empty chairs around them?

Are they sitting in an identical room with 12 holograms? Do you ever use Skype? I basically invented it here. You're saying you predicted Skype with this scene. They're Skyping. You don't have to sit in a special chair for Skype. When I'm Skyping with my mom, I don't build a replica of her bedroom. Well, that's your choice.

It sounds like you have some sort of issues there. Okay. Any issues, just bad. Cool. The Wookiees come up for the first time in this series. Cool. Yoda just springs into action. Oh, Yoda's never looked better?

Do you think Yoda's a good-looking guy? No, I just mean it digitally. We had to use a puppet in the first moves we made. I'm excited to see that. Well, don't get your hopes up, because this looks perfect. I can make a better Jedi. Now, you've created two Jedis of your own. No, three, I think.

One was a bad guy. He created one Sith, Darth Stupid Idiot. What's this? Darth Stupid Idiot. Yeah, yeah. That's a great name for a Jedi. Isn't that a good name? Yeah.

And he's a jerk, and he's always wet. You know, I invented a couple of Sith characters that had cool names. Darth Icky. Oh, I like that. Do you remember Darth Icky? No, when was Darth Icky in these movies? No, it was for the video game. LucasArts was making a video game, and I pitched a couple.

They said, hey, George is here. Why don't you name a couple? This is 100% serious. Like everything you said. I'm trying to remember what the other one was. Was it Darth Icky? Does anyone remember who the other one was? Darth Insanius.

And Darth Icky. Thank you, John Henry. Was that John? That's John Henry. Round of applause for John Henry. I think they didn't end up using them because they were too cool or bad. Uh-huh. They thought it would overwhelm the game.

Well, can Ben pitch you? He had two Jedi characters created as well. I want to see from the master himself. Sure. I feel pretty good about him. All right. So is Bat Kipso, I think was his name? I think his name was Bat Pecky.

Thank you. Bat Pecky. I don't remember. That's fun. Okay, sure. But he's from a cave planet. Okay. No such thing, but go ahead. Well, not yet. No, I mean, yeah, but we could invent it. that's fun okay sure but he's from a cave planet okay no such thing

but go ahead well yeah but we can invent it we can make it this is an expanded universe I wish I was still I would make these happen

if I was still in charge of it but talk to Disney he's a Batman yeah he's a shameless Batman ripoff sure we call that an homage that's an homage

I didn't really his parents were murdered and that caused him to turn to the life of the Jedi he is an orphan too but I didn't really think of that. His parents were murdered, and that caused him to turn to the Jedi. That's true. He is an orphan, too, but I didn't realize the connection. I like the other one better. Oh, Alagashu.

That's our good guy. He's a big Jedi. Oh, that's great. You know? Because they're always small. Ben thinks your Jedis are too small. Yeah, get a big Jedi. So you don't set a bar for how small they can get.

Yeah, right. It's like Yoda's tiny, but none of them are above our human size. It's like a snooze fest. Come on, make it big. How big are we talking? Sure. Really big. Really big.

Well, I mean, I probably would have had some bigger Jedis if they'd let me make Episode 7, but they really weren't interested. Now, Episode 7, you said, is being directed by J.J. Abrams. Yep. Who also created Felicity. Right. Felicity. Right, which is on the shirt that you're wearing right now. Right, I'm wearing this just as a sign of support.J. Abrams. Yep. Who also created Felicity. Right. Felicity. Right, which is on the shirt

that you're wearing right now. Right, I'm wearing this just as a sign of support. I wish him the best. Every time you invoke episode seven, it seems, I might be over-reading it, but it seems like there's

a bit of resentment in your tone that you weren't allowed to make the film. Well, I told them what to do and they ignored it. So, you know, don't blame me when you see the new movie.

Because I had planned, I pitched them an idea, which was have less of Han Solo, you know. Don't know what you're talking about. Just cameos. We haven't met these characters yet. We haven't met them. And it would mostly just be about new characters that I had created. Thought it would be really cool, but then Disney went their own way. And, you know, they may pay a heavy price in a little less than a month.

So are you a fan of J.J. Abrams or not? Sure, I think J.J.'s a good kid. Because right now you're essentially wearing the T-shirt of like, it's like if you wore the T-shirt of the person who's fucking your ex-girlfriend is what you're wearing right now. No, I mean, I wouldn't wear the shirt of the man who designed the stained glass window

at the entranceway to Skywalker Ranch. What is this? That's the person that Marsha Lucas, my first wife, took up with after we split. And I never took that stained glass down, so in a way, it does make sense that I would wear this shirt.

Read a book about me. Wait, you had... Your wife left you for the man and... It didn't last. It didn't last. Well, yeah. She, you had... Your wife left you for the man and stole... It didn't last. It didn't last. Well, yeah, she left you. Sure. No, no, even the same class guy. Her relationship with that handyman, whatever, craftsman,

whatever you want to call him. Artist. Have you seen it? No, I haven't. I mean, it looks fine. It's fine. Do you still have it standing in your office? No, it's at the entrance. It's the foyer. So every day when you walk into work, you walk through the foyer that was made by the man who took your love away from you.

Yeah. Poured a lot of that pain into this movie. Do you not trust love, George? Love's dangerous. Look at this. They're happy right now, but... They don't look happy. She's rubbing his chest.

How's that not happy? They're content. Noir. Every lack of a space in the subtitles I wrote. Oh, it's just beautiful. Look at that. Can you imagine what it looks like on Life Day? Leading up to

Life Day when they put all the decorations up? It's like Christmas and Hanukkah. Put together. Now, I believe this is your cameo coming up. Isn't that right there in the corner, in the lower left-hand corner? See him in the black. Georgie Porgy Lucas as Baron Papanoida with his daughter. Doing great.

Can you tell us a little about your preparation work to get into the character of Baron Papanoida? I watched what I did in Beverly Hills Cop 3 and I'm like, I just gotta match that. Now, not to crib from James Lipton. Sure. On Inside the Actor's Studio. Alright. Would it be possible to talk to Baron Papanoida here today? Sure. Yeah.

Do you need time to get into the character? Nope. Hi, Baron Papanoida? Hi. How are you doing? Doing good. Can you tell me a little about yourself, what you do for a living? Well, right now I'm just waiting outside. I'm here going to the Jedi Council.

It's an opera. It's the opera, yes. The opera here. Are you a patron of the arts, Baron? Yep. Is that a hereditary title or were you elected? Both. This opera's pretty cool.

Hey, this is your favorite scene. This is my favorite scene. Or your second favorite scene. This is my second favorite moment. Now, does all performance in... These were based on the things you used to buy at the Sharper Image. Is this what all performance looks like in the Star Wars universe? Yeah, it's just big bubbles.

Do actors ever appear on stage or is it all bubbles designed by other people? No, I mean, this is a very specific kind of... Why do their armrests have glowing red lights? That feels weird for an opera. It might be distracting. So they can warm their hands before and after they applaud. Those are, yeah, they can warm their hands for applause. They're also for safety.

I guess, George, my question is, if I were to go to a stand-up club in Coruscant, would we see, like, four big bubbles making observations on, like, race and gender dynamics? Maybe. And airplane food. Yeah, you might. It depends. Space plane food.

Space plane food. Space racial dynamics. Yeah. It depends. Yeah, they're probably... Yeah, you go into comedy places and there'd be bubbles on stage performing. And then there's probably controversies because there's probably creatures in our bubbles

who are like, only bubbles in this club. Movies will just be bubbles one day? Is that your hope? No, this took place in the past. None of this is going to happen in the future. You harp a lot about these things being cyclical. The ring theory. that's not my theory that's just a cool thing you can look up online i mean if i did it great but you know i

just try to make great movies i don't have a it's not now this is this is arguably the scene of the movie yeah this is the term arguably sure yeah this is the turn uh Yeah. The implication here that you kind of allude to but you don't directly acknowledge is that Palpatine is Anakin's father. Because Anakin was an immaculate conception. Certainly, yeah, father figure, yeah. No, but he also says here that along with

Darth Plagueis, who was his mentor, they learned how to create life purely out of the Force. Yeah. In Phantom Menace, Shmi says that there was no father, it was an immaculate conception, and his midichlorian rating was off the charts.

Does that not seem like you're laying out the breadcrumbs to have us believe that Palpatine made Anakin out of space magic? Subtitles are just saying something right now. I don't want to...

I don't want to... Yeah, that's great. I don't want to answer that question because part of the mystery of the movie is, you know, it's sort of one of those things where you leave a little bit to the audience's imagination because it's more intriguing. There's basically, he either made him out of space magic. Okay. Or what if maybe like he snuck into her house when she was asleep? Oh, come on now. George, come on.

This is a family movie. He's bad. He's a bad man. I'm saying it's possible. He's saying it right now. Create life. Yeah. And you think he's not capable of taking a woman who's asleep without her consent? Why are you doing this? This is the most evil character

in the universe. I'm sorry. George, no. Stop. Please. I'm sorry, but that's one possibility. I want to leave all the possibilities on the table, but obviously I don't want to be overt and say this because these are children's films. But in both of the awful scenarios that you just presented to us, Palpatine is the father. Yeah.

Or maybe he's not. Maybe it's just space magic and it happened that's magic like strange magic no no okay they're different sorry space magic is for boys strange magic is for girls okay good good very binary thank you I think this is a great piece of acting I also I think it's great good piece of acting. I think it's great. I do want to give a... Obviously, there's Gulf War parallels, and there's George W. Bush parallels in this movie. I don't want to draw too much attention to those. There is also, I think, a little bit of a tip of the hat

if you've seen the movie Midnight Cowboy. Yeah. The plot of this movie is essentially a version of when John Voight's character, if you've seen Midnight Cowboy, there's a scene where he needs money and he goes into a movie theater and has a sexual encounter for money

with a young Bob Balaban. And then when he's done, and Jon Voight is not gay, so this is an instance where for money he does this. And then afterwards, he says, can I have my money? And the teenage Bob Balaban breaks down crying and says, I don't have any money. So John Voight did this sexual act in a movie theater for nothing.

Okay. Kind of like what Palpatine does to Anakin in this, which he says, you gotta give in to your anger and your dark side or else your wife's gonna die. So he gives into his anger and dark side and wife dies anyway. He feels the same. Sorry for spoiling the movie. So you're saying

the entire plot of this film is an homage to that one two minute scene in Midnight Cowboy? That's one way to look at it. Again, I don't want to spoil the movie but that's one interpretation of the film. He's sitting in a chair, Ben. Was that what you were noticing? Well, I mean, yeah, they all poop in those chairs.

No, the Chewbacca character. Oh, he's here. Yeah, Chewbacca. Who is this guy? He's big. He is a big guy. He's big. He meets that criteria. I like that about him. Big. Hairy, too. Why not? Big and hairy. He's a looky. There's so much time dealt with

talking about Chewbacca. He doesn't even do anything. Now, you told us that Chewbacca comes back. That's right. He's a wookie. But there's so much time dealt with talking about Chewbacca. He doesn't even do anything. Now, you told us that Chewbacca comes back. That's right. He's a big character. He's Han Solo's furry friend. We don't know who Han Solo is. You have to talk to us.

See, this guy's way bigger, though. Tarfful seems like a cooler guy than Chewbacca. Look at him. He's huge. So right now, if I were on set, would I just see- Power generators. That's the issue I was talking about earlier. Power.

They're main power generators. Things work on energy, and that's why the Destroyer Droids, they don't use them as much because they use them... And it works on two levels because Palpatine's also obsessed with power. Oh. This sequence is bizarre. They're great. See, everyone's compelled by this.

Yeah. And you see some of the... You see, like, those houses are identical to in the Star Wars holiday special when you visit Chewbacca on the Wookiee home planet. Look at those in the back. That's just like Chewbacca's house. There's a Tarzan yell there. What was your choice to use a Tarzan

roar in that moment? These are fun adventure films. I did a reference to Wayne's World in episode one. I did a reference to Tarzan in this. What was your Wayne's World reference in episode one? I had Jar Jar Say exquisite me. Oh, great.

There's a segment I do on the show. I try to do every episode. The merchandise spotlight. And there's something we've been building up to since the very beginning. There's one piece of merchandise

I've been obsessed with since the very beginning. It's the ComTech chips. Oh, my God. ComTech chips. Gotta cheer. The Phantom Menace that allowed toys to talk.

I have spent over $100 in the last seven months. $100? Yeah, probably, yeah, collecting ComTech chips. So this bag is just duplicates. Because I had to complete a set, but I finally have a complete set now, and I also bought a ComTech reader.

Now this was, thank you, thank you. Wow look at it, so small. May the force be with you. May the force be with you. Great lines. The mirroring, you like that? Ring theory. Now this was supposed to change the game much in the way that you reinvented the technology to make films, right? Yeah, I reinvented film soundtracks, I reinvented special effects, I reinvented a lot of stuff. The idea was that the toys were too small so that you couldn't put voice chips inside them so they literally had physical chips that came next to them and you have to use this to make sounds.

This is a little game I want to play. Sure. To show off what the sound quality was. This was the big selling point. Now toys talk. That was the big selling point. Yeah. Now, toys talk. That was a big selling point. I want to show off the level of audio recording quality on these. Great. I'm going to play a clip. You have to identify

what character it is, okay? Alright. This is not going to work at all. No one's going to hear that. Now, you're putting it into the microphone that's going into the recording, but not amplified. Is that? Yeah. Okay, ready? I couldn't hear that. Now, you're putting it into the microphone that's going into the recording, but not amplified. Is that? Yeah. Okay, I couldn't hear it. I know I can't hear it.

Okay. Alright. Worth it. Worth it. That was absolutely worth it. Is that Palpatine? Yes, correct. Okay, ready? Look, Dream Seekers. I'm not going to miss the second Dream Seekers in a row.

Look at this. Real quick, bring the sound back. Oh, we missed it. Thank you, Griffin. Now he's looking at his iPad. No wonder you hate these movies. Come on, do it again. Do it again.

That was fun. Name this character. Oh, that's Darth Maul. He's just getting the lines, though. These all sound the same. Okay, ready? Wait, that's a Gungan, right? That's a Gungan?

Each chip has three lines, right? All right. Is that Jar Jar? No, it's Podracer. Odie Mandrell. Odie Mandrell, okay. I knew it was somewhere in that part of the movie. He has zero lines

in the film, I believe. Oh, those are exclusive to the toy? I didn't write those then. You didn't write them. These are expanded universe? Okay. Yeah, and no longer canon

thanks to Disney. My troops are in position to begin searching this swamp. They will not stay hidden for long. They all just sound like Stephen Hawking. Yeah, that sounded like

that was from the movie that came out last year. A Theory of Everything? That's from A Theory of Everything. I think you've been ripped off. What?

I think someone, did you buy those on eBay? Someone mistakenly sold you some of the merchandise toys from Theory of Everything. I'm Queen Amidala.

That's Padme. That's Padme. You don't even plug it in. You just sort of brush it against the ComTech reader. That's how it works. But you hold the toy up so it looks like the toy is talking. You have to hold the toy up at the same time. You need three hands to operate this thing.

This is a three-hand operation. You need a buddy. You need a chip, you need the reader, and you need the toy. Yeah. Use your foot. Yeah. That's a classic line. Hilarious. Oh. I'm about to die, Jedi. Yeah, that's a classic line. Hilarious.

I'm proud to die, Jedi. Oh, yeah. Nope, that was Darth Maul. That was Darth Maul. Darth Maul also only has one line in the film, right? Yeah, I think he's quoting Palpatine. Palpatine? I now own five different Darth Maul Comtech chips. This is the part where...

Oh, Booga! This is my favorite character. Thank you. This is the part where Obi-Wan says, is there anything going on here? He says, no, not at all. And then one second later, he says, everything's going on here. I understand. So you don't think this looks great, George,

having an actual human being wearing clothes with stuff on his face, fake teeth? There's a lot of digital stuff going on that's making that work, though. You know? Like these little guys in the background here. Doesn't Ewan McGregor look more engaged that he actually has someone to play off of him? I don't think so. Really?

No, I like the digital feeling. Like, look at that. I think the practical stuff only works if it's polished up with a little bit of digital magic. Oh. Now we're cooking. Here we go. It's a little decoy action from what we won there. Yeah. I like this jungle, like... Jungle music?

Yeah. Booga! Oh, fun stuff. See, this is fun, George. I know, thank you. Yeah, you complained earlier, but this is my favorite part. Look at her. She's so much fun.

It's a feathered iguana. And she loves life. Look at how happy she is. Yeah, she has a great life. She's made a new friend. Guys, I'm sorry. I can't. Oh, my God.

Past guest, Morgan Evans. Hi, Morgan. How's it going, guys? Strumming the stage. She's made a new friend. Guys, I'm sorry, I can't. Oh my God, past guest Morgan Evans. Hi, how's it going, guys? Stunning the stage. What's going on, Morgan? Well, first of all, huge honor to meet you. Big fan of Star Tours. Morgan, I'm going to congratulate you. I believe you recently won a digital award, right? Yeah, some sort of digital award.

You won a digital advertising or digital? Some digital, yeah. That's great. Yeah, thank you. Well, work travels fast. We both win awards. Big fan of Captain EO. Big fan of all that you've done for Tomorrowland.

So you're taking credit, George, for the fact that Morgan won an award for making web series? Well, no. He won a digital award, and I'm a pioneer of digital technology. That's true. This is all true. I don't think those awards would even exist if I— So you just think you and digital. That's just synonymous.

Digital is me, yeah. I have no beef with George Lucas. That's great. Thank you. I also hardly any beef with you, David. Oh, good. Most of my beef lies with this man. What beef do. Digital with me, yeah. I have no beef with George Lucas. That's great. Thank you. I also hardly any beef with you, David. Oh, good. Most of my beef lies with this man. What beef do you have with me?

You don't remember? No. I created this podcast. You created Dick Griffin and David present? Yeah. We were golfing. Okay. You remember?

Yeah, of course. And I said someone should do a podcast about movies. Right. And you said that's a great idea. Right. And I said you and I should do a podcast about movies. And then you you said, that's a great idea. Right. And I said, you and I should do a podcast about movies. And then you took a molly. You were really golfing?

And then three weeks later, this shit came out. Remember this? I didn't bring it up on the show because I didn't want to, you know, I needed it for my career to get these digital things. Right. And then, so I'm sitting at your podcast looking at you, expecting the whole time I'm on your goddamn show that you'd acknowledge the fact that I created all this, all this. You didn't create all of this.

Yes, I did. That was a different show. I said a show about movies. These are movies. Griffin, these are movies. Yeah, but we were talking about doing Griffin and Morgan Presents. It's an entirely different show. No, I'm talking about people talking about movies.

I have no idea what's going on. Up until now, people have just been watching movies. I said people should talk about movies. We never talked about these films, though. Any movie. You're taking credit for the idea of anyone talking about a movie ever. Yes, I am. I'm talking about putting people, seeing movies,

then sitting down and discussing these films. Not just that, Morgan. You were saying a podcast in which Griffin and someone else talks about movies. No, I'm talking about people talking about movies. See, George, you're giving him too much credit. He's claiming that he came up with the idea of people discussing films. That's what, exactly, yes.

Well, wait, if George created Morgan and Morgan created this podcast, then George created this podcast. God damn it. I mean, even... What do you think of this scene? I think it's too bright. It's supposed to be too bright. That's how he feels. As a filmmaker, that's your complaint,

is that it's too bright. Yeah, I don't... Yeah, but you see what I'm talking about? This is what I'm talking about, right? You like this, what we're doing right now. I'm saying this is what I was pitching when we were sitting in the golf cart, and you were going,

oh, my skin feels crazy. Because it was on Molly. I didn't know what I was saying. Don't give him any money. Morgan, we're making a lot of money off this show, and I can't give that up because I got a lot of kids. That's okay. That's not about the money for me. This is about defining something. I don't know what to call it. I would call it film discussions.

Morgan. What? I mean, to give you some credit, you brought that idea up. I said that would be fun. What movies do we talk about? What about Phantom Menace? Yeah, and then you call blogger. You call a blogger. Yeah, because do you remember what your response was? Fuck you, I don't like

Jews. Yeah. You said, A, fuck you, I don't like Jews, and B, you said, never, Captain Kirk is a fucking herb. Yeah, he's Captain, you guys want to come over here and slobber all over Captain Kirk's dick, be my guest. It's not a movie! Morgan, if you don't like Jews, you'll love a character in episode

one of The Phantom Menace named Watto because he's not Jewish. He's a Guido. No, he was my favorite character. We talked all about it on our podcast. No, that proves it because he doesn't like Jews and he loves Watto. It's not that I don't like Jews. It's that I don't like Griffin's form of Judaism. All right.

My form of Judaism? Now, Griffin, what form of Judaism do you practice? Tell him. Agnostic? I don't know. That's the worst kind. That's exactly what I mean. I'm a big fan of Jews.

I'm sorry for not being a better Jew. Criticism. That's what I wanted to call it. The movie. You're claiming that you created film criticism. Yeah. Like in paper form, in film form. David, how long have you been a film critic?

Oh, I don't know. A few years. Seven years. And then seven years in one day is when we went golfing and I came up with this wonderful idea. A few weeks ago. I mean, yes, your case is holding together pretty well. Thank you. Hard to argue. But I still think you're giving yourself too much credit.

Morgan, this is your favorite scene. Booga and Obi-Wan are two people from totally different species with different viewpoints on the world, and they're working together against a common enemy. I think this is wonderful. I can't wait for the Spock man to come. He's not in this movie. That's a different movie.

What movie's that? Star Trek. That's what we're watching. Star Trek III, the Revenge of the Sith. No. And who are these? These are ghosts? These are Jedis.

These are ghouls? You haven't even seen these movies. No, they're Skyping. They're Skyping, okay. But they're stand-up Skyping in this scene. Did you see Paranormal Activity 4, the ghost dimension? No, I didn't.

How was it? It's a lot like that scene right there, yeah. What's this? This is like a big air hockey table? How do I make it up to you, Morgan? I would love to have you in your podcast today. Here's what I would love. You don't have to make it up to me.

I would just like for everyone to boo Just Griffin. Great. Can everyone hear Just Boo Griffin? People aren't going to do it. Boo! I was wrong. They did it very quickly. I was wrong.

Thank you. Thanks for having me. Morgan, look. Morgan, you're a big LA celebrity. Do you want the dupes? Oh, can I have a... I want to give you... Here, reach your hand in and pick some ComTech chips.

Any ComTech chips. You're going to need a reader, though. They cost about $25. Yeah, $25. Also, they take 9-volt batteries. 9-volt batteries. 9-volt. What did you get, Morgan? He looks like Paul Scheer.

Yeah. No, that's not Paul Scheer, though. If you look on the back, it has the name, I think. Oh, it's Rob Hubel. Morgan Evans, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you, Morgan. Morgan Evans. Now, you mentioned batteries again after criticizing me for talking about batteries in the movie.

So that's really your overarching point. It's about power. It's about literal power, how we abuse it. The films are about power, the abuse of power, and energy is part of power. There's an energy in the universe, dark side, light side. You got a Spotify notification there, Ben. Now, this is a pivotal scene. This is Palpatine telling Anakin.

I read on Wikipedia that his lightsabers are hidden in those vases. Really? They're that big? Yeah. George's got Star Wars shoes on. That's real. These are Vans. Star Wars Vans. Pretty cool stuff. I have to say they're horribly uncomfortable.

I regret buying them. Not good shoes? How much, do you have final say? I mean, I guess you've given up the company now, but did you used to have final say over all the merchandise? Yeah, I would approve everything.

Did you sign off on every single ComTech show? Yep. What about that thing where the candy comes out of Jar Jar's mouth and it looks like his distended tongue?

Yeah, the lollipop is his tongue so you have to make out with Jar Jar? Yeah. What about the lava berry Pop-Tarts? I'm going to save you some time. The answer to every question is yes. Okay, so we're not even tracking with this movie. I am. It's going

great. Okay. From this point on in the film, Hayden Christensen never has his head higher than a 30 degree angle with the ground. Was that a move that he came up with or is that a note you gave him? That's a note I gave him. They're almost dancing with each other here.

They're sort of facing off, circling. Definitely, yeah. The circling is very much a dance of power. See, I totally forgot about this scene. I've never seen this movie ten times. He comes close to actually doing the right thing here, and Palpatine convinces him very quickly, with very little, that he should

keep it cool. Now, do you think, this is a big question I've had throughout the whole series. The prophecy was that Anakin was the chosen one. And that he would restore balance. And he did.

Is the balance that there's just two good Jedis and two bad Jedis? Is that the idea of balance? The balance is that there were too many good people. There were too many good people in the world? I mean, two balances out. Does that not add up? Two equals two, you're saying? No. Two is the same as two?

Yeah. Yeah. You don't think that... Does anyone want to check that the numbers work on that? I think they do. No, the math, yes. Two and two are the same number. All right.

But I'm saying that is the prophecy in your mind, was that he will kill all the Jedi so that there are only two left and there's an equal number of Jedi and Sith. But then also, ultimately, and I don't want to spoil it, but eventually it has to be balanced. Yeah, there's more movies. There also, ultimately, and I don't want to spoil it. There's more movies. I don't want to spoil too much, but in episode four, you might notice that he's Darth Vader

in that movie. So Darth Vader's a big part of the next couple films. In the next movie after this one, Darth Vader, he keeps saying, other people will say, let's not do this. And Darth Vader keeps saying, no, I people will say, like, let's not do this. And Darth Vader keeps saying, no, I have an idea. This is how we should do it.

And Darth Vader's almost always wrong, as it turns out. But then he's the only one who's unscathed. So was he the main character in the next one? No, he's not the main character. He's, like, the main bad guy. Who are the main characters in the next one? Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo. The babies?

We're talking about. Yeah, those babies. Let's talk about this movie, Griffin. Come on. This is your favorite scene. That is Booga... He's in his Dr. Doom car. Yeah. Iguana falls down. Look at this.

This part was fun to make. Yeah, this is like the French Connection, basically. Yep. Now, Gr is like the French connection, basically. Yep. Now, Grievous has made a miraculous recovery since the last time we saw him. Yeah, he was coughing and stooped over. He's very agile now. Adrenaline. He's very excited by the fighting.

Yeah. Don't underestimate him. He's bad. Now they're just slapping each other. Yeah. Don't underestimate him. He's bad. Now they're just slapping each other. Yeah. He's presented as being a real threat. This guy's impossible to beat. Oh, he had to take a bike chase and a booga chase

and lightsabers and this and that. And then he just opens up his chest. One fluid motion. Why wouldn't he wear a vest? Why wouldn't he... Because he's so tough. He's so badass that he's like, I don't need it. I'm not going to front. He just keeps his organs exposed to everyone at all times.

Yeah, because he's like, I'm not afraid of anybody. I'm the baddest guy here. Hubris. Classic in Greek tragedy, Shakespeare, hubris. Hubris is a big theme. Why wouldn't he close the chest panels back up? Yeah, he should have probably done that. He should is a big theme. Why wouldn't he close the chest panels back up? He should have probably done that.

That was an error. Now his eyes are going to catch on fire. General Grievous never thought this would happen. He's got fire eyes. He never thought this would happen. This is his worst nightmare. Right now, if he could talk, he would say,

I have a bad feeling about this. So his worst nightmare specifically was that someone would pry open his chest cavity. Shoot him in the heart. Did you see what happened to him? Leave it there open for a minute. In a million years, he never thought anyone would do that. Okay, so Anakin had that whole conversation with Palpatine. He just gets back over to the Jedi Temple and he's like,

Hey, Mace, can I talk to you for a second? Yes. Look at the energy in this scene. Not looking at each other, stooped over. Okay. Still doesn't believe it. Three movies in, he still doesn't believe it. That creepy dude is maybe the bad guy.

Who has seized all power in the galaxy. Yeah, weirdly. Taking control of everything. And there's definitely something wrong because the Jedi's powers don't work anymore. Yeah, which they're not telling anybody. I mean, again, this is hubris. He doesn't want to believe it.

Because he's like, our worst fears would be realized if this is true. What was it like working with Sam Jackson, George? It was fun. You really let him cut loose in this movie. No. There were a lot of takes we couldn't use. He's a very energetic actor,

and I put a stop to that. You told him no energy. You just, no energy. Zero energy. I heard the opposite of what Kubrick's approach. You know where Kubrick, when he worked with Nicholson on The Shining, he would use the craziest take.

I would do so many takes that eventually he'd get tired. Most of the takes that I shot, it cuts right before he falls asleep. That's true of a lot of the actors. You would just work all day until Sam was just a sleepyhead. The first takes would be so not what I wanted,

and then we would just work them until he got to the point where he was like, we need them. They should all feel very tired of this, what's going on. Well, like Terrence Malick famously mostly shoots at Magic Hour. He waits until sundown. Oh, look at that. But I made Magic Hour happen.

I don't have to wait for Magic Hour. I create Magic Hour. It looks just beautiful. If I wanted every scene to be Magic Hour. So he goes to the temple while Mace goes to see Palpatine. He just goes. No, just here. Now you're figuring it out. He just goes to take a nice

long shit. He's just sitting on a chair. We know chairs are for pooping. That's how the Star Wars universe works. Can I say they have a great apartment? It's a very nice apartment. Now, he's not on the lease, right? Because they're not legally married. Or they're not openly married.

They might just be roommates. Coruscant is very progressive in terms of domestic partnership. Like, it's a city. It's a city planet, so it comes with all of the things you'd imagine. Very progressive.

But I have to imagine she's paying most of the rent, right? Because being a Jedi must not pay money. I actually did talk, I talked to Woody Allen. Woody Allen was a big fan of the apartments

that the characters have in this movie. In this film, okay. He was like, apartments are great. Yeah. Really influenced the apartments in some of it. I was like, Woody, don't be afraid to have characters have apartments in your films that they couldn't afford.

Yeah, that looks a lot like the... Like you see, Melinda and Melinda is a great example. Great movie. Great movie. That came out before this movie, but go on. The apartments in that are very reminiscent of this. All right, so this is crime. Oh, wow.

Now, I can't believe you allowed a tear here. That's uncharacteristic. No, I didn't allow it. I CGI'd it. That's a CGI tear. I created it. Oh, looky, looky. Who's here?

C3, yeah. Notice the arms? That's how you make a droid. All gold. Why would you make a red arm on a droid? Do you have a question? You made two of these, two or three stars. What?

But they were shiny. They weren't red. Guys, guys, Kid Fisto. Oh, shit. Kid Fisto, ladies and gentlemen. Motherfuckers. Fucking Kid Fisto. Sassy tin in the house.

Fan favorite, Kid Fisto. No way. Kid Fisto's lame. He's like Aquaman. No, he's not. Don't say that, Ben. Don't say that. We'll take a lot of guff about this movie from you.

Now you were worried the last hour of talking, what's it going to lead to? It's going to lead to this. Yeah, this is cool. I'm expecting one of those exciting knock-down, drag-out battle. This is one of the best scenes you're ever going to see in a movie. I'm pumped. At this point, I've seen it nine times. I'm still pumped. I think this is going to...

Okay, comes out from under his sleeve like Travis Bickle style. Lightsaber out. Oh, boy. He flubbers. Oh, Griffin wants to know how come he doesn't fly everywhere. One, two. So Kit lasts for a second there.

He lasts a little longer. You knock three of your four Jedis out within six seconds. Because he's a badass. But Mace sticks up for himself. Sam Jack's really really into it. He's into it. He's giving full body performance. Right.

Okay, and then Anakin's like, you know what? I should come. I'll get in the car. I'm just gonna, I have the keys. Yeah. Palpatine gave me his spare keys. I'll land on his parking space. Everyone can get in anywhere very easily.

Anywhere. This is a galaxy of access. Pillars. Pillars. Now, Griffin, do you have a problem with the fact that Palpatine doesn't spin fly everywhere? Yeah. Whoa. I just think if people had that ability, wouldn't they use it all

the time, unless it used up too much of their energy, is your point. Yeah. Broke the space glass. That's the kind of glass that they use for apartments on Coruscant, because the buildings are so tall in space glass.

McDermott's getting into this too. See, I'm loving this. Yeah, very divisive this performance. He should really chop his head off any time at this moment. Anytime, anytime. That's not the Jedi way. That's not the Jedi way. There's not even a door there. A Sith would have done it

but a Jedi won't do that because Jedi's are good guys. Cool shot. He's going to Mirandize guys. He's going to Mirandize him. He's going to Mirandize him. Anthony Daniels dubbed that line. We couldn't get audio from McDermott. So I was like, Anthony, you're British. Do it. Dark side energy bolts. Dark side energy like, Anthony, you're British. Do it. Now what?

Dark side energy bolts. Dark side energy bolts. Everyone say it with me. Dark side energy bolts. Dark side energy bolts. I mean, nobody counted on dark side energy bolts. George.

Yeah. The voice that Palpatine uses there, he has not employed at any earlier point in the films. Well, do it a little bit. A little bit. Yeah. And now he's turning into... Now his face is getting turned into Mumble's influence. Yes.

What made him... Is his real voice the do it, do it voice? Or... Yeah, and is this his real face? Yep. That's his real face. That's his real face. So it was all a disguise up until this point.

He's been pretending. He's been playing the role of a real human being. That's his real face. That's his real face. So it was all a disguise up until this point. He's been pretending. He's been playing the role of a real human being. This is his true nature. This is his true nature. Yeah. So is he human? He was afraid if he showed this face, no one would like him. And he was right.

But what do you mean? He's super popular once he shows this face. Yeah, he gets elected to emperor. Yeah, they're going to clap for him. Yeah, they love him when he he shows them. He was worried. But that's part of, I guess that's part of the lesson is don't be afraid to be yourself. That's what this movie's about.

He spent a lot of time pretending. Just be yourself, man. Pretending, but this is what he identifies as. Now Mace Windu, who you've established in the previous films as being the most powerful of the Jedi's. Oh. This is a sad death for a strong man, you know?

He's knocked out pretty quickly here. Do you defend the way this depicts Mace Windu? He's gonna say it. Of course I do. Limited power. So it's all about batteries? He's not like a destroyer droid. He has unlimited power.

Oh, hell no! Okay. Why the black man gotta die, George? Why the black man gotta die, George? Jonathan Braylock and the Black Man Can't Jump podcast. Hi, Johnny. I'm genuinely terrified right now. Hey, James III from Black Man Can't Jump. I'm here too. What the fuck is this bull shit? This is a whole bull shit.

Thank you. All due respect, Misa, sorry. Okay, so George, George, these... You're going to explain Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar Binks is the coolest guy in all the six movies. Oh, no, no. He's cool, and he's a good friend, he's loyal. He's a politician, senator. He gets a great job.

First of all, how come he got to cut the man's hand off, and then you electrocute him, and then he just has to fly out a goddamn window? Pushes him out the window, and he falls forever. It feels like you had some vitriol over Mace Windu, the only black man in the goddamn galaxy. Only black man in the galaxy.

No, that's not true. Lander Calrissian is also black. We haven't seen that movie. I have to spoil it. Later off, I cut off a whitey's hand. I do, and he falls the same way. Well, you cut off his hand, too. I do. Oh, you think just because I cut off a whitey's hand. I do. And he falls the same way. Well, you cut off his hand, too. I do. Oh, you think just because you cut off another white dude's hand...

I do. ...it's okay because you cut off the... No! In my defense, I'm 71 years old. I'm actually very progressive. You have to look at me in context. What do you guys think of the defense? It was a pretty strong defense right there.

I'm 71 years old. Mace Windu. Nice to meet you, James. Mace Windu is really cool. Wait, I have a question. Yeah. Do black women exist in these movies?

Good question. Do they come back in the 456? My wife is a black woman. That's true. Is she in the Star Wars universe? She's not in the movies.

Didn't you put your kids in these movies? Yeah. How come you didn't put your wife in the movies? Huh, George? Because she didn't want to be in the movies

and I wasn't going to say no and also I made them before I met her. Because she didn't want to be in the movies, and I wasn't going to say no, and also I made them before I met her. But she doesn't want to be in Star Wars movies, and I respect that. I'm not going to tell her she has to be in a Star Wars movie. You know? Mesa don't like you.

Yeah, no. But Mace Windu's a cool Jedi. He's probably the coolest Jedi in these movies. It's true. He is the coolest Jedi. And what happens there is a bad thing. An old white man, like I was representing, the way the, unfortunately. George is really on the ropes here.

No, I'm not on the ropes because what I reflect, this is, the worst events happen in episode three. This is the lowest point. And it reflects as a metaphor the way Earth society, even though these are alien movies and I don't want to make parallels between alien races and human races because that would be ridiculous and also

troubling. It'd be troubling if there were racist characters in these movies. I would hate that. What if? Well, we can speculate all day, but let's talk about what's really in the movies. But Mace Windu's death is a big tragedy. I'm against it. I wish he won, but he didn't.

Because these movies are a tragedy. Right, but how come Yoda and Obi-Wan get to get away? Well, isn't that how it always happens? Like, I'm critical of it, but like... Yeah. Typical, right? Yeah. Am I right?

Is that how it always happens, George? It shouldn't be, but like... Respect, right? You had the power, George. You had the power to change. You had the power to change. You had the power to change. Wait, wait, wait. Talk about, talk about, talk about,

how come when Anakin turns evil, he becomes a black man? Hey, no, he just... Does he not? Yes, he does, George. Do you not hear the voice of James Earl Jones? Explain his voice, George. Explain it.

Later on, I promise you this, later on it's revealed there's a white man pretending to sound black. So wait, so when he becomes a white man and becomes good again, he gets to be white? Is that what you're trying to say? No, he's sad. He's sad and shriveled and he's embarrassed. But you're saying he's pulling a Dolezal the whole time.

He's doing the voice. He's very much. Anakin Dolezal. He's fronting the whole time. You know? He's fronting. Yeah. He's trying to play like he's black, and he's not.

I think it's one of Anakin's worst traits, is that when he becomes Darth Vader, he tries to sound black, and he's not. Shame on him. Seriously, shame on him. And at the end, he's humiliated, because they take off the helmet, and they're like, what?

The most pale character in any of these movies. So the whole Star Wars saga is just a lesson to white people not to try to pretend to be black. Yeah. Be yourself. Just like with the Emperor of Palpatine. Be yourself. Don't pretend not to be shriveled and evil when you are.

Don't pretend to be an actual politician. No one... I'm on your side. I'm shaking my head, George your side I'm shaking my head George Lucas I'm shaking my head shame on you for not liking Jar Jar Binks because he's cool what do you mean he's cool? he's a bumbling buffoon

he's not cool at all read the internet the last month what if he's pretending to be wait are you admitting that that internet thing is true? no it's not true. Wait, what's the... I don't know the internet thing. What is it? There's a theory that he's secretly

just pretending to be bumbling and then later will be a cool villain. He's not. He's a great guy. Who would pretend to step in poop? No one. James, John, of course, you host Black Man Can't Jump, which is a podcast about depiction of African Americans

in big Hollywood films and whether or not they help the cause and the cause is to have more people of color leading films that are not about race

this film has one person of color admitted by George possibly Jar Jar how do we think this film ranks Commander Cody he's a Pacific Islander he's a Pacific Islander.

He's a Pacific Islander, sure. He's a guy who gets to be a clone and gets to get killed again and again and again. And he's about to murder all the Jedi. So how would I rank Revenge of the Sith? I would say if you gave it a black fist, if it helped the cause, a white palm. Black fist, white palm, or nothing.

I mean, this movie gets nothing. I mean, it gets no... This movie gets nothing. There's no... Hold on. It doesn't support the cause in any way. Let me, at the risk of causing another problem, have you seen the last movie I made was Red Tails?

Not counting Strange Magic. We're not talking about Red Tails right now. We're not talking about Red Tails, Lucas. Do you like that movie, Red Tails? Do you like that movie? You can't just bring up Red Tails like that. It takes care of what you did in this movie. For decades, George, for decades.

Red Tails. Because let's not even talk. You want to talk about Lando Calrissian. Lando Calrissian is a goddamn pimp. Everybody knows it. Everybody knows Lando's a pimp. You saying that in a good way? No, in a bad way.

Let me tell you about it. Okay, this is a spoiler, Brent. Here's how cool Lando Calrissian is. He's in charge of Cloud City, all right? He is cool. And he shows up, but he's been tricked into doing this thing where he's had to betray his friend Han Solo, Princess Leia, all these things. Doesn't even see this coming. All quick deaths. Can I point out, though?

No real violence to the deaths like we saw with Mace Windu. Right, these deaths are sad music playing. It's a tragedy. When Mace Windu dies, he falls out a window. She doesn't even turn around. Who cares about a blue woman?

Oh, she does turn around. Nope, not really. Kind of. She gets damned and some mushrooms. They're killing her like police kill black men all the time. That's overkill. There's 44 shots right there. Yeah, I was right.

No, hold on. But in Empire Strikes Back, Lano Carissian knows that within a few minutes, he is going to have to betray... Guys, you're talking about a movie we haven't seen. I have to say this.

We don't know what you're talking about. This is Plo Kloon. He's going to betray them, but with like five minutes until he reveals he's betrayed them, he's actively trying

to have sex with Princess Leia. He's actively hitting on her. That's cool. Yeah, that's a... He thinks he's betrayed them, he's actively trying to have sex with Princess Leia. He's actively hitting on her. That's cool. Yeah, that's a pimp. Like, he thinks he has a chance. He knows five minutes later she's going to hate him. But he's still, like, turning it on. Wait a minute.

Is there a swirl? Is there a swirl in that movie? What do you mean? Is it a black man gets to have sex with a white woman? Have sex with a white woman. No, but, like, he gives it his best shot in, like, the most dire circumstance. Because he's that cool. No good, George.

He has a shot. George, I'm shaking my head again, George. Do you guys think Disney would be crazy enough to put a black man as a lead protagonist in their film? I wish. We talked about it. It's just he's like a pipe dream. You guys aren't going to be happy. He's a stormtrooper.

Wait, what? They make a black guy into a stormtrooper. I never did that. All the stormtroopers in this movie, they're not black. I don't understand. They're all... How does that work, George? What do you mean?

I mean, I... George, I think you just have to swallow your medicine. You've gotten two nothings. What do you mean? You got two nothings on their scale. Yeah, sorry, George. You didn't help the cause. No, I'm portraying the problem in this universe.

I'm showing that it is a problem. By just being a problem. Well, I think you're wrong about Jar Jar. He's a good friend, loyal, helps win a battle. Guys, Anakin's about to kill some children. I don't know what else you want from him. He gets elected to the Senate. Then he gets tricked.

I have one question for you guys. I have one question for you. Sure. Is Hancock a good movie, though? That's a good question. Griffin, that's a great question. Is Hancock a good movie? That's a good question. Griffin, that's a great question. Is Hancock a good movie? Griffin, that's a great question.

Is Hancock a good movie? How do you feel about Hancock? Do you like Hancock? That was a really sad scene. I haven't seen Hancock. I haven't seen Hancock. Is it a good movie? It's a great movie.

I believe you. It's a great movie. James III and John Braylock from Black Man Can't Jump. Thank you for being here. Thank you, George. Thank you. I believe you. It's a great movie. James III and John Braylock from Black Man Can't Jump. Thank you for being here. Thank you, George. Thank you. Padme's crying. Padme's crying.

Oh, she's crying. She's sad. This is more emotion than you usually allow in these films. Right here. That's a full-on five-second shot of crying. Yeah, she's sad. People aren't allowed to be sad before then? I showed people sad.

This is going to go crazy. This has to be your point of pride in the entire film. This is your son. I'm proud of every moment. Your son, Jet Lucas, is Zet Jucasa. Hey, he's not here yet. Smith's. It's versus Smith's.

Pro Smith's. What's wrong, Ben? Why are you sighing? It's still going on. It's a lot of movie, Jet. Are you sad you missed part of it? It's a whole lot of movie. No, no.

I've seen it enough times and heard these guys talk about these movies for 30 hours. And I have to edit that. What's his name? Jet? Crazy. Jet Zucasa. Look at that guy go. Look at that little guy go.

The kid's called Jet Lucas. Jet Lucas. The character's Jet Zucasa. Right. So we're at like the hour and a half mark. Wait, really? Yeah, we're almost done. Thank God.

Yes. Can you play it at half speed? Do you want to slow it down? We're at like the hour and a half mark. Wait, really? Yeah, we're almost done. Thank God. Woo! Yes. Can you play it at half speed? Do you want to slow it down? No! This movie isn't slow enough. Swimming. Swimming.

You had to point out that he was swimming. Is that real or is that digital? Digital. Of course it is. I find it easier... I actually totally forgot about this. Yeah, that's how great it is. Oh, fun. What?

Nighttime. You never see him like this at night. Well, thankfully all the Wookiees are dead. But you said Chewbacca's back. Yeah. So is Chewbacca the last of his species? No, he has a Christmas, a Life Day celebration. They hid this thing behind a bush. But you said Chewbacca's back. Yeah. So is Chewbacca the last of his species? No. He has a Christmas, Life Day celebration.

They hid this thing behind a bush. There's Itchy and Ha Ha. David, we haven't asked Griffin about how much money he makes. Oh, yeah, yeah. I don't want to miss him. So what'd you clear on? I'm unemployed. I don't want to talk about it.

Griffin just filmed a whole HBO season. I did nine out of ten episodes in a season. Ben, can I make a request? Yeah, of course. It's coming February? February 14th. I make residuals if you watch it on HBO Go. As soon as we're done watching the movie,

can we watch all the deleted scenes from this movie? No, we're not going. As soon as we're done watching the movie, everyone's going to leave, George. If I watch vinyl HBO Go, how much do you make? Like two cents, four cents? Probably something like that. Cool.

Let's see how great the music is there. John Williams did do a great job in all three of these films. Yeah. Oh, this is such a cool ship. Thank you. This is a great ship. Now, tell us about the design process for this ship. Look at this.

Look at that. It's so clean. Look at that. So simplistic. Minimalistic. It looks fantastic. I love this, George. That's all digital.

Where'd this come from? That's not digital. Stop lying to me. What is your obsession with digital things? Why don't you want to live in reality, George. That's all digital. Where'd this come from? That's not digital. Stop lying to me. What is your obsession with digital things? Why don't you want to live in reality, George? Well, you like things that are handmade, right? Yes, I love them. Digital.

So you're saying, oh, because the fingers type the keys. Yeah, because it's digits. Yeah, digital. Yeah. I just don't understand this aversion to practical things. Is it because, okay, okay, you're the man who your wife left you for made things with his hands.

Griffin, you're getting mad again. No, he was a craftsman. He made stained glass windows with his hands. And you looked at that and you went, oh, I'm only working on computers from here on out. No physical art. Is there any connection there, George? Nailed it.

I didn't think I was going to win that one. No, it's true. I think John and James really knocked him out. They did. You seem a little defeated. Yeah, you seem a little winded after that. Mace winded. No, I feel bad that they feel that way. You do feel bad? I do feel that they feel that way. You do feel bad?

I do feel bad they feel that way. The only thing I can tell them is just go back and re-watch the movies. I think you'll see that you're wrong. This is where Anakin has already murdered children, all right? He just killed a room of children. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were getting yelled at. We were going to talk about the Benny Hill music.

Yeah, you were going to do Benny Hill music over the child murder. I think that would make that scene so much better. We couldn't technically work that out. A little Benny Hill music. Yeah, you were going to do Benny Hill music over the child murder. I can't believe we missed that part. We couldn't technically work that out. A little Benny Hill music while he's killing kids? No, all of the music has to be John Williams unless it's like an Ewok song or Slice of Noodles. American Graffiti was like one of the big early instances of using pop songs. Oh, yeah, it changed everything.

And then you never did that ever again. No, because why repeat yourself? But then Strange Magic, you soundtracked it with the hundred songs that are on your iPod? Two hundred. Humble brag. Yeah, well, each movie's different. Obviously, Star Wars, you want repeating themes. You want to have things like that.

Every project's different. These are all just one long movie, six-part movie. So you're telling us up until this point we've only seen half of the story. At this point we've just seen seven hours that constitute the first half of the film. That's right. Get ready.

Apologies for the middle part of the next thing you're going to watch. This part's heartbreaking. They're so sad. Yeah, he's really stroking her earlobe right there. Good acting. I mean, you seem to... Even Ben's sad at this part.

Ben's just shell-shocked. Look at him. George. I'm just trying to establish a timeline. Is that the Empire Steel Boots? That looks like the Empire Steel Boots. That does look exactly like the Empire Steel Boots'm just trying to establish a timeline. Is that the Empire State Building? That looks like the Empire State Building. That does look exactly like the Empire State Building. They just dropped that in there.

No, because this... No, if anything, the Empire State Building in our world ripped off that because this happened first and this is about the Empire. This is a movie, George. It's not real, George. It's not real. I'm a billionaire. I can do whatever I want.

Are you saying that Jews are based off of Watto? No. They saw Watto a long time ago and decided to base their behavior off of him? I told you, he's a dirty guido. How is that better? It's not. I'm just saying it's different. Watto's not even in this movie.

That's a great ship. Cool ship. That's a great ship. Thank you. This isn't so great. No, that's just as good. It's just as good? That's just as good.

George, I'm just trying to establish a timeline here So you make these films This is a long movie, you could have cut this maybe? No, you gotta know how ships get into things Otherwise you would have been complaining How'd that little ship get into the bigger ship? Also it pays off later These movies are very concerned with how people get to places

It's true Like you always show them walking through the door Climbing out of oceans Where do you live? I live up in West Harlem. You live in New York City. How often do you talk about like oh the subway this or whatever. Yeah but nobody's making a movie about him talking about taking the subway.

Most people cut those parts out. Well that's not my fault that no one's making a movie about Griffin. That's not my fault. I don't make movies anymore. I mean. But that's a common thing. People love to talk. If you live in a city where it's a lot of, like,

driving and highways, people talk about, oh, how do you get to work? How do you get here? And I think it's valid to show, like, how people get from here to there. Big universe.

Oh, great edit. Mustafar. Here. So, describe this planet for us, George. It's a volcano planet. You know how, like, you have one planet

made of cities, this planet's made of volcanoes? The whole thing's a volcano. Is it all one volcano? George. It's a volcano planet. You know how, like, you have one planet made of cities, this planet's made of volcanoes? The whole thing's a volcano. Is it all one volcano? The whole planet's a volcano. It's one volcano. It's this whole planet. And are these guys just mining volcanoes?

Yeah, they get hot rocks for energy. That's the energy source. Is lava a source? It's an energy source. It's controversial because there's a lot of people saying, like, it's not sustainable. You're going to use up all the hot rocks on the planet. Like, we need to find a all the hot rocks on the planet.

Like, we need to find a better power source. So the Neimoidians, who I know you've defended them, but they're not popular characters. They are popular characters, and you insist they're Asian, even though you admit they've never been to Asia, nor are they related to anyone. I don't know that they've been to Asia. I didn't say they're not Asian. I'm telling you. Okay. Do you know that I created Star Wars? Yes, I do know that.

Will you trust me when I tell you that neither they nor anyone in their families have ever, ever been to Asia? It is hard to trust someone who has hurt me this much, George. I know. I know. A lot of tension. How did I hurt you? I made magical films for you that you've watched again and again and again.

How did I hurt you? Show me on that bag of toys where I hurt you. I mean, here. Okay, ready? Lot Dodd. Jar Jar Binks. Captain Panaka. Hours of joy. Panaka ain't so bad.

Yeah. Cool scene. Cool scene. Cool scene? That's just a shot of a ship. Here's another shot of a ship. Just a shot of a ship. You know how that started off? It was just green.

I mean, yes. And I turned it into that. And I turned this into this. And I turned this into this. Your argument has always been, if I don't love these movies, then why am I watching them so much? And it's because, honestly, these

films contain all the elements of everything I love in a movie. Thank you. I love spaceships. Thank you. I love epic storytelling. You're welcome. Laser swords. I love laser swords. You're welcome. You're naming things that are in this movie. Robots. I like long-term narratives. Sure. Well, okay, I made six movies.

Do you like R2-D2? Yeah, he's cool. Well, take a look, because there he is. I know he's kind of a dick. I don't Sure. Well, okay. I made six movies. Do you like R2-D2? Yeah, he's cool. Well, take a look because there he is. I know he's kind of a dick. I don't know. He's all right. Are you glad he exists or do you wish

I would cut him out of the movies? I think he has a lot of potential. I see so much potential in all these movies. Who are these little guys? These are great.

Who are? Why are they? They're just fun little floor robots. They're like little... Why do you want answers to everything? They're fun little scatterbots.

It feels like you're just throwing glitter in our face. You're doing like a Rick Taylor. You know what? I wish someone would throw glitter in my face. It sounds fun. The Neimoidians have been established as the ultimate villains throughout these films. Really. Right.

They set the whole thing in action. They're evil. They're greedy. You cut away right when Anakin's going to kill them. You show us Anakin killing children. More powerful if you don't show it. You show Yoda killing stormtroopers? Yeah, yeah.

There he goes. Yoda's cool. You know what, Gryffin? You know what? Here's the problem with your generation. Oh, wait. Take a look. It's gonna be fun. I want to hear what the problem is with my generation. No, I don't want to hear what the problem is with our generation. There he is. Jar Jar. Jar wait, take a look. It's going to be fun. Wait, no. I want to hear what the problem is with my generation. No, I don't want to hear what the problem is with our generation.

There he is. Jar Jar. Jar Jar. Represent. That's what I represent. Okay. Thank you. So see? This is... Everyone loves him. He should have done this way earlier. Yeah, that's what he's learning. People are accepting him for who he is.

How come they're not saying his face is all fucked up? That's a positive message. No one knows what's talking about that. If Joe Biden suddenly showed up like that, people would feel sorry for him. He's super popular. No, they wouldn not saying his face is all fucked up? That's a positive message. No one's talking about that. If Joe Biden suddenly showed up like that, people would feel sorry for him. He'd be super popular. No, they wouldn't be talking about it. They would. No, they would. Dead children. But how come he uses that popularity only to do the wrong thing? Why doesn't he turn back at this moment?

Why doesn't he at least cry right now? He's looking at a room full of dead children. He should be crying. Now you're begging for CGI tears. By a lightsaber, he was. Someone has a question about Yoda? Someone has a question about Yoda. Here's a problem with your generation, okay? Yes.

Earlier generations knew how to have fun and appreciate... He kills most of them on screen. He does. Yeah, you're right. You were wrong. I'll accept your apology in any form. Just say sorry, Griffin. The problem with my generation is...

The problem with your generation is earlier generation when I made Star Wars movies, they liked them. And then your generation, so you get everything handed to you. There's Charger again. There's Powder. Blood, blood, red.

A little cameo by Powder. So you're telling me that the generation that saw the early test screenings in the 70s and 80s liked them. Yeah, they knew how to enjoy a Star Wars film. And I disliked these movies when I saw them and that's the fault of my generation. Because you get everything on your phone. This was 2005. I probably didn't even have

a cell phone at this point. Okay, well then you were sad about that and it affected how you saw the movie. Do you take responsibility for anything in your entire life? Sure, I take responsibility for me in five and a half of the best fucking movies of all time. Red flag. Red flag. Yeah, seriously.

That's a major red flag. Great orator, though. He's good at speeches. That's why they like it. Wouldn't it be great if a president did that just... Oh. Look at that eye acting from Smith. He did a full middle to left eyeball move.

Did you tell him to do that? No, I did that digitally. Yeah, I thought so. Oh, now you hate these guys, but look how great it is now. What, to watch them die? I don't know. Could have done with a decapitation there. Well, yeah, Dooku, you went all out,

and this guy, you gave him, like, a cut across the chest? Yeah, you gotta do everything different. And look, it's General Grievous' favorite color again. See how much of it there is. Yoda's the same color. You think Jocasta knew died? What happened to Jocasta knew the librarian from

Attack of the Clones? They're in her library right now. Died of a stroke. Unrelated to any of this. I didn't want to show that because that's just sad and doesn't further the plot. This movie's definitely straight away from tragedy. I host a monthly talk show at UCB East and I have said before that people ask why Jar Jar isn't in this movie.

And I have said before, and I'll repeat it here, that I had to cut it. The problem was Jar Jar's plot in episode three took up the same amount of time as this movie. You shot two and a half hours of Jar Jar. Wow, so there's a whole other movie. There's a whole other movie, basically. Jar Jar gets lost in a grocery store

and causes all kinds of mayhem, all kinds of havoc. And it actually was the best part of the movie. But sometimes you have to cut the best scene in the movie. It's too long. That was supposed to play as one continuous scene. There was going to be like an hour and a half of Jedi stuff. In the middle of the movie there was one continuous scene. Two and a half hours of Jar Jar in a grocery store. We tried different edits where we

would cut back and forth. I think it's better if it was one hour and a half, two and a half hour shot in the middle of it where he's in a grocery store. It was one continuous shot. It think it's better if it was one hour and a half, two and a half hour shot in the middle of it where he's in a grocery store. It was one continuous shot. It was like Birdman. It was one. Yeah, because it's digital.

There's no cut. It doesn't matter. Fuck you, George. What do you mean? No, but I had to cut it just because it doesn't advance the plot of this one. And then, you know, I... No emotion. no emotion.

No emotion. He's whining about having to kill Anakin right now. They're in shock. Do you understand? Shock doesn't look like this, George. These people are just... It's like someone told them that the subway's going to arrive in five minutes. No, most of the characters in the prequels are in shock the whole time.

They look like they're experiencing a minor inconvenience. That's what it looks like. Well, that's what people in shock, they often aren't projecting the emotions that you would expect. Here's that lovely apartment again. So we've seen like seven scenes since the moment that Anakin landed on Mustafar and killed all the Nemoids. Right.

What's he just doing now? Like three days of that. Just walking in a circle. Just making sure they're dead He's just in a room with dead bodies For three days Make sure they're dead Because you don't know, maybe they come back to life

I've commented that there's some interesting tension Between McGregor and Portman A little bit Was that intentional? Oh yeah He touched her on the shoulder just then Yeah Definitely I wanted there to be something fun going on here Was that intentional? He touched her just then. He touched her on the shoulder just then. Definitely, I wanted there to be something fun going on here.

I have seen a security hologram. But did you ever consider having that as a motivator for Anakin to turn to the dark side and lose his trust? What do you mean? Well, his best friend, his mentor, and his wife. If he suspected them of having an affair, maybe that would be the impetus to then freak out and kill a bunch of people rather than just being worried because you had a nightmare. I mean, Griffin, okay, that sounds like a great, complicated, Merchant Ivory film, but this is a children's movie.

You've got to keep it simple. I want kids to enjoy this. Stop trying to get answers from Griffin. I want kids to have fun when they're watching this movie. And what you're saying sounds like it's very sophisticated. I applaud you. Maybe write a college paper on it or something. Have you ever watched a child watch one of these movies?

Sure, they have a great time. They do. You see them just having fun watching scenes like this. Yeah. They have fun. They're just having a ball when they watch stuff like this. Yeah, they love it. He has become a very great friend. That's a great line. That's a ball. They have fun. Stuff like this. Yeah, they love it. He has become a very great threat.

That's a great line. That's a line. And she can't. That's why she says it. And then they just think about it. They've got a lot to process. He gets up. She sits there because she doesn't want to get up. She feels differently than him. He stands, but he

looks at her because he has another question. He wants to know, is Anakin the father of... And she's like... By the way, doesn't look pregnant at all. Doesn't want to tell him at first. Where's the baby? Not pregnant. Where's the baby?

She's not showing because... She has a fountain in her apartment. Yeah. She has a water feature. She has twins, and she's 12 hours away from delivery. She's about to give birth. That was a space bidet. Now, George, this is coming up on the most effects-heavy stretch of the movie.

Mustafar. All this. You see all the everything. It's all gone so wrong. What a dark side he's turned to. So we promoted that we were doing this show, and we were contacted by a former employee of yours from ILM, your special effects company, that we were doing this show, and we were contacted by a former employee of yours from ILM. Oh, right.

Your special effects company who said he wanted to come talk about the process of doing the effects for this scene. He said this was the most complicated scene in the movie.

So I don't know his name. He emailed anonymously, I think, you know, so as not to sever the relationship with you. Grant, we have an ILM employee here to speak on the film. A round of applause, please.

Oh, hello. Hey, George. Good to see you. How you doing? Good to see you again. Oh, what's your name? Sure, I'm sorry. Oh, my name is Mike, please. Oh, hello. Hey, George. Good to see you. How you doing? Good to see you again. What's your name, sir? I'm sorry. My name is Mike Drucker.

Oh, hey, Mike. I'm a guest for Lights and Magic. Yeah, that's the name of a former guest we had on the show, but you're a different person. I'm Mike. I'm Mike.

We're going to 3PO run. That was just a CGI 3PO that ran out of the show. Yeah, right there. Right there. Mike, give us some insight into what's going on. Yeah, so you give us a time code.

You said this time stamp of coming up right now is the most special effects heavy moment of the entire film. I assume you mean the Mustafar battle. No, absolutely not. What people don't know is that our most advanced CG character is Hayden Christensen himself. Really?

We started by hiring a Canadian actor, but then he wasn't very good, so we thought we could do better with motion capture. And if you watch the same scene where he talks to Natalie Portman, you can really see that it's some of the most advanced CG we've ever done. So who did you hire to do the motion capture?

Oh, that was me. You played the role. That was me. Well, I have a similar body type. I'm amazed you don't recognize him, George. George said that... See, right here, complete CG. Looks great. Thank you. Thank you very much. I appreciate it, George. I only do here. Complete CG. Looks great.

Thank you very much. I appreciate it, George. I only do the best for you. While this scene's going on, this scene isn't very important. Does anyone have any questions about the effects in the film? Yep. It's an open call. Please, anyone has a question about the effects in the film? Did 90% of them myself. You're talking to apparently the man

behind the role of Anakin Skywalker. See right here, this was made on a Cray computer. So you used all the vocal tracks that Anakin recorded. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, we had them in a studio for two weeks. Right now, Padme Amidala is about to land. And she's played by a real woman named Natalie Portman. You can see her in other movies.

But if you've noticed, Hayden Christensen hasn't been in anything. Yeah, not in a lot of movies, Hayden. We tried to put him in a movie about a reporter, a small indie thing. It didn't work. Nobody saw it, so we killed the character. So you're saying Hayden Christensen wholly owned by IOLA. Wholly owned by IOLA.

With Disney now. Disney now, unfortunately. Sorry, George. Loosely inspired by a Canadian TV actor and then brought to life through the magic of digital. You're really holding on Natalie here. Yeah, you got it. You can't cut away from this.

Not when that's happening. So, all right. CG right there. I don't know if you can tell, but this is not a real place on the planet. No, I can tell. Yeah, I can tell. This doesn't exist. Well, because it's also not a real planet.

Right. Yeah. All these windows, green screen. You don't think it, but all right. So here he comes. That took three months for that shot. And that's you walking. That's me walking.

How do you get a hug? Alright, hug. Did you have to wear a robe, or was the robe CGI? No, the robe was CGI. I mean, I just wore a bunch of ping pong balls. Now watch his eyes. His eyes actually never meet hers. That was intentional.

This was an intentional choice. See, we do our best to keep the eyes down. Eye is the most human part of the person, so we try to keep them out of the shot as much as possible. Closed. So what was the creative intention there? So that's the reason you just couldn't get that. We couldn't get that right.

It's just what the technology wasn't there. Right. It was 2005, 2004, different time. All right. You see, you can't see their eyes ever meet. Yeah, he wouldn't want to look at her because he killed younglings. Right. Of course, of course.

That's kind of a cheeky smile. That's an interesting acting choice for you. Well, we had a stock archive of different expressions you could put on him so you could animate it faster. So this is confusion. So he's like an emoji. He's like an emoji, sort of, but before emojis. So Hayden Christensen was kind of your Simone.

He was my Simone. I would call him my Simone. I did fall in love with him in a way. Really? Yeah, of course. How can you not fall in love with that face? Did you think there was a big career to follow? Did you think you could make the ideal male movie star?

I honestly believe there would be hundreds of thousands of movies with him in them. And unfortunately, the audience just didn't connect with him the way they did with our other CG, Jake Lloyd. So Jake Lloyd was motion captured, too? Jake Lloyd was also motion captured. We tested him in The Sixth Sense. People liked him a lot. Or at Jingle All The Way, rather. That was Haley DeLoss. See? Right here.

There's a big line between the shots. Different shot. That's a stand-in right there with long hair. Is that you wearing a wig? No, that's just a stand-in right there with long hair. Is that you wearing a wig? No, that's just a stand-in that's approximately the right height. 5'3". All right, see right there? Stand-in, CG character.

That's a tennis ball just being held up for Natalie Portman to respond to. So was she acting against anyone on set on the day? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. George always told us that the best way to do it was to give them nothing to respond to at all. Okay. I find this endearing.

I don't know if this is good acting, but I find it endearing. She's so earnest. See, she's really acting, and we're doing it with the best we had in 2005. So you're saying it's a matter of limited technology. Limited technology, limited time, limited budget.

This was an independent film, technically. That is true. With a budget of, I think, $150 million. Griffin, this is what you wish for. This is what you wish for, Griffin. Don't say this is what I wish for. I didn't wish for him to murder her. No, no, you wish for them to be without tension.

He sees Obi-Wan there and he gets mad. Yeah, because he thinks that she told him, not that she thinks they're together. See? Again, she's supposed to be nine months pregnant with twins. We would also never have an actual man force choke a woman. I mean, that's respectable. I'll give you props for that.

Great. Come on. Alright, now we're about to get into our second biggest CG effect, the lightsaber battle. Right. I like this little, like this,

it's almost like a pre-samba kind of like stare down, you know? None of this existed on Earth. Except Obi-Wan's just overloaded with awful exposition. But Ewan McGregor was real, right? Ewan McGregor was real, but if you notice, we had to hold off for a while because we didn't have the processing power to actually have them get close to each other in a physical way. Yeah, it's like Roger Rabbit and Bob Hoskins. They can touch only

very rarely. There's no life in his eyes. So you're, I mean, that was a technical limitation that you had to weaponize. That's what we had to weaponize. He was going to say the light side the whole time, but we figured dark side, no life in his eyes, easier way to go with it. Is that true, George?

Yeah, some of it's true. You know, it's all very complicated. When you're making a movie, there's a lot of different people, do a lot of great work on it. You know, you try to control every aspect of it if you can, ideally. Again, not a place on Earth. Yeah. And now it's easy to do it because it's digital the whole time.

Now we're just in flubber land forever. A lot of people compare this part to Shakespeare. To like Shakespeare? Yeah. Any particular Shakespeare? Name one person. Tragedies. I would say it's like Shakespeare? Yeah. Any particular Shakespeare? Name one person. Tragedies. I would say it's like Shakespeare.

Well, I mean, basically, I hate to call you out on this, Dave, but your former employers spent all last week giving big smooches to these movies. The AV club. The AV club last week says these movies are great.

People should appreciate them. Before I go, though, I want to point out one thing. Yoda, you don't think it, CGI. You're kidding me. Absolutely. That's not a guy? We thought about going with a puppet

and no one would believe it, so please CG. Who did the performance for Yoda? I did. You did the Yoda? How many characters in this film did you play? I did the Yoda by going on my knees

and putting two shoes in front of my knees. So you dwarfed it. Yeah, I dwarfed it. It doesn't wear shoes. All right, well, thank you guys very much. Thank you so much, Mike Drucker.

No relation. No relation to past. I hear he's a Tonight Show fan. Oh, Ben, you're back. I heard a noise backstage before that sounded like a man dying. And it was Ben making a noise. I think you just don't...

Just weary. This movie is taking a toll on you because it's devastating making a noise. I think you just don't... Just weary. This movie is taking a toll on you because it's devastating what's happening. I'm sorry. I'm giving you the movie you need, not the movie you want. I don't... No, I don't want that.

I don't want to pay for that. Yeah, but this sets up the next movies where things go differently. How many times do you have to set something up before we get to the part that we actually want to see, George? Make this movie good. Make the thing we want to see. Three times.

The answer is three. It's the same number of licks it takes to get to the Tootsie Rolls sign over a Tootsie Pop. That's your inspiration was the Tootsie Roll Pop. Yeah, one, a two, a three. Yeah, and then he bites. Three. He cheats.

The owl cheats, George. I'm not the owl. The number can be the same. The intention can be different. George, I know I'm coming at you with a lot of anger. Yeah. I'm sorry. I am too.

Give in to your anger. I feel like... You're supposed to feel angry. Come on, look at this. The whole point of this movie is it's supposed to make you mad. That's how Anakin gives in to the dark side. He gives in to his anger. I think these are the movies of someone who doesn't trust other human beings anymore.

I don't. Who views love as an evil. No, it's not an evil. I have a good wife now. Well, right, but this movie was made in between those two points. You have a wife. She leaves you for a stained glass window artist. You make these three films, and then you get married afterwards. And now

you've seen much happier. And then it makes Strange Magic, which is a very happy movie about love. Yes. Okay, well, artists, are you going to get mad at Van Gogh for what he painted after he chopped his ear off? No, I'm just trying to make sense. Are these the cries for help? Are these the cries of a lonely man who just wants to find human connection in the world? Look, this is my blood

on the tracks. You know what I mean? George, I'm asking you. It's a little dude and an old guy fight. Were you sad, George? No, I was very happy, but sometimes you can draw on a past sad memory and tell a sad story. No, no, but I'm getting at something. Look at this. He's choking him out.

George, do you make these films so someone would ask you if you're doing okay? No, I make these films to make people happy and make people angry. Make people feel things and also make a lot of money. George, can I say something to you? Sure. It's not your fault. I know it's not my fault. It's the fault of that guy who made the stained glass

window. George, it's not your fault. Listen, I know it's not. Griffin, I'm not the one who has issues. You're talking about building a room that's a replica of your mommy's house. George, it's not your fault. Listen, this is a great movie. You're missing the point. Look at this battle. Have you ever seen Good Will Hunting, George? This is the pog back.

Listen to me. Look at this. Find one thing wrong with this. You almost broke... Griffin, you almost broke through. You were close. I was really close. No, you're not close.

I thought movies are the language. I'm a happy guy. I had a great life. Things are going great for me. I made Star Wars. He has a billion dollars. He does have a billion dollars. All the money comes back to George. All the money comes back to George.

Look at that. Oh, that's good acting. That's good sword fighting. Ben's crying because he's so sad he knows how it's going to end. Ben, you've seen this before, right? So you know how it ends, right? Ben, have you seen the ending before?

Alright, so that's why you're sad. You should be sad. Look at this. Oh, they want to be friends, but they can't be anymore. They're jumping and fighting. They have problems with each other, but I think deep down they want to care about each other. They just can't anymore.

So are they activating... What are they doing here? What? They're on Volcano Planet. They're turning off the machine? No, they're fighting in a room that has machinery. So the fact that things are Now they're out on the patio. Alright? So it's more dangerous because inside

they were safer. I would say it's more of a veranda. Inside, I don't think you could tell. Inside was air conditioned. Outside is very hot. Volcano hot. See, this is the pog battle. They're just throwing pogs at each other. Great work. Oh, boy. Now this is fun because he's controlling those little frisbees.

I don't know why we didn't make these as toys. People could throw these. They didn't make these as toys? You didn't make these as toys. Not as frisbees. That would have been good. Frisbees that explode when they hit something. We've seen Yoda prove himself to be a great fighter.

Why is he so... No, we haven't. We saw him lose. He's really... We haven't seen him be a great fighter. He lost a fight to Duke. Stumped by this. Yeah, he does the spinning move here.

So has every Yoda fight a draw? That we see. I didn't want to show him winning fights. That's boring. And you hear the musical theme from... From Phantom. Duel of the Fates from Phantom Menace. Yeah.

It's all coming full circle. So if you like Phantom Menace, now you're like, oh good, the song I like. Every time I hear this music, I want to eat Taco Bell food. Did you have a hand in that campaign? Yes. The Chihuahua and Colonel Sanders and the Pizza Hut employee all went on a journey across the galaxy in a car?

Yeah. Did you write and direct those? I didn't direct those, but those were canon until Disney decided to make the expanded universe not part of it. You seem to have a lot of resentment for Disney. I don't. I love their money. I just hate their decisions. That's gross. Yoda's fingers suck. Yoda.

So you have no creative say over the future of Star Wars? Not anymore, no. I email them stuff, but they don't like it. You think they've added you to a spam filter, George? Sometimes I feel like I'm going in a folder I don't like. Oh, no, he lost his jacket. Well, this is silver lining, okay? This is silver lining.

You know, I do have a complicated relationship with these movies, but I admit, it would be fun to be in a Star Wars movie. So you said the next one comes out in a couple weeks, right? Right. That one's done. You can't be in it. It's locked. Okay, and the next one, Episode 8, is there an Episode 8?

Yeah. It's in two years. Yeah. Are they still casting for that? No, they're done casting on that. And who's directing that one? That's Rian Johnson. Ooh, that's a good choice.

Yeah, he's a good director. J.J. Abrams, Rian Johnson. That's a good choice. Yeah, he's a good director. JJ Abrams, Rian Johnson. These are some good names. Are they going to make an episode 9? They have to round out the trilogy, right? I see where you're going with this. That could be fun. Who's directing episode 9?

I'm trying to remember his name. It's the guy who directed Jurassic World. Hey, my friend Steve helped produce that. Don't boo it. Colin Trevorrow? Yeah. Colin Trevorrow? Yeah, Colin Trevorrow. That's his name. Colin Trevorrow is directing Episode 9?

Episode 9? No, not Episode 9. Yeah, it's 9. Sorry, bud. Do you think he's ever listened to the podcast? Probably. We've mentioned him a couple times. It's a very popular podcast.

I like this scene a lot. And here they are. They're still fighting on the volcano because now you know they really mean it. Yeah. If they didn't mean it, they would have stopped fighting by now. But you can tell there's no hope for them.

You think they couldn't maybe take a break and be like, hey, let's move this somewhere a little safer. No, they're so mad at each other. The reason they fight on a volcano planet is I wanted to show that they're so mad at each other that they don't even say, let's go fight somewhere that's not a volcano. Obi-Wan's mad because Anakin killed a lot of people. And Anakin's mad because Obi-Wan was on a ship. That's right. Yeah, okay. Just to get everyone's motivations in line. Obi-Wan is a a ship. That's right. Yeah, okay. Just to get everyone's motivations in line.

Obi-Wan is a good guy, and Anakin is now a bad guy. And you can tell that because Obi-Wan's motivations are a little more noble. And Anakin's kind of unreasonable because he's going to the dark side. So how many hundreds of people worked on this, like, one, two minutes? I mean, it's all about the same. It's all about the result. Oh, this is a great scene. He's in there.

This was actually just candid footage. Showing how he gets places. This was just candid footage that we did of him having a schmitz. Jimmy Schmitz knows to pull up. Schmitzship. Schmitzship. This isn't the Schmitzship. It's just a Schmitzship.

It's a good Schmitzship. It's not the Schmitzship. Into exile I must go. Fail I have. So he takes responsibility, George. He knows he messed up. Okay. Should have won.

And you also said in our last episode that Yoda was the character you related to the most. Yeah. So do you ever feel that, you know, you have failed? Nope. In any way, at any point in your life? Never. You're not going to get him, Greg.

No, I mean, if by failed you mean... I mean, like, you think this movie's a failure, yet you can't stop watching it, and it's a hugely successful movie by any metric. Oh, no, I can stop watching it. I don't think you... Easily. You say that, and yet here you are.

That's true. You got me there. Yeah, I've been. Now they're going to swing at each other. Best kind of lightsaber fighting on a rope. I know that you're friends with Griffin Gabriel. I don't believe you're that good of friends. You would watch this this many times.

You'd love it on some level. He's on payroll. Now what's going on here? What are these things? Oh, beautiful work. Now, in a behind-the-scenes documentary, you credit Steven Spielberg with coming up with this idea of the thing. The director.

The director. He helped you out with some of the previs on this movie. Yeah. We're buddies, so we all help each other out with ideas. I mean, any filmmaker. Like, filmmakers who are friends with each other. Ooh, that looks realistic. There's just no weight to this sequence.

Yep. And you always contribute a little bit. Like, there's insert shots in The Godfather that I directed. Is that true? Yeah. That's crazy. Like, when Al Pacino's character sees a newspaper headline and it cuts the newspaper, I directed. Is that true? Yeah. That's crazy. Like when Al Pacino's character sees a newspaper headline and it cuts the newspaper,

I directed that. You directed the shot of the inanimate object. Of the newspaper. And I had a great time working with it, even though it was a practical effect. It was easy to direct the newspaper to get the performance I wanted. And it really felt very similar working on these films. It was like I'm working with that newspaper from The Godfather

again. Getting that same from The Godfather again. Getting that same level of classic movie performance. Ben's just texting right now. Ben's just texting on his phone right now. I should have known the Jedi were planning to take over. You should have. We're at the two-hour mark. Here we go. He tells them that the Jedi are not evil.

This is the denouement of the film. And then he explains, from his point of view, the Jedi are evil. Yeah, from his point of view, you see the Jedi are evil. Yeah. Look at those random guys. And so you see what he feels is true from a certain point of view. Now, George Jedi are evil. Look at those random guys. And so you see what he feels is true

from a certain point of view. Now, George, we're coming to a sequence that I really don't understand, which is the high ground sequence. Let's talk about the high ground. What is that about? Yeah, you really gotta clear your throat out for that one. Pulling a Grievous there, aren't you? Pulling a little Grievous. The high ground sequence, a classic film sequence

that movie fans love to watch. Now, in this sequence, even though they're both Jedi with magic powers, because one of them is a little higher than the other one, he is undefeatable. Even though Anakin could go anywhere else.

I have the high ground. It's over. And he holds his hands up like, you know it's over. Why doesn't Anakin just jump down over there and then run at him? First of all, do I need to explain to you how lava works? Don't try it. Don't try to jump over me. He just lazily slices at him. No, I mean, you're taking it literally.

He was higher, but he has the moral high ground. That's why he's going to win it. That's true. Why does that never come up in any previous battle, though? Yeah, why don't Jedi's just constantly try to run up some sort of ledge or slope? Yoda had the high ground over Palpatine because he was in a higher hockey puck. Yeah, I know, but Yoda will never have the high ground. He'll have the moral high ground, but never fully have the high ground because he's so short.

He's very short. So you're saying it's literally about who's taller. This is Ewan's big moment. This is Ewan's big moment. Oh, yeah. Which he will, eventually. Well, you could argue he already has. Brought balance to the force?

Yeah. 2-2. Kind of a cold move to just leave him there. Or he could just kill him. He's still mad at him. And also, he hates him. He's still saying hurtful things. Anakin hates him.

We cut Obi-Wan a break. Because even at this moment, Anakin's still saying hurtful things. Anakin hates him. We cut Obi-Wan a break. Because even at this moment, Anakin's still saying really horrible things. And Obi-Wan's saying nice things. That's true. Well, he also said... These are nice things, even if they're past tense. Yeah, past tense. And Anakin is saying things like that.

And that's really too late for him. Yeah, when you get close to lava, you know your clothes catch on fire. You're saying that like it's not true. Yeah, I am saying that like it's not true. Yeah, I am saying that like it's not true. Fun fact, not real fire. It's all digital. And Obi-Wan hates this. He's like, it's disgusting.

Yeah, it's gross. Yeah, no one would want to watch this happen to anyone, let alone someone they've known for ten years. Right now, Obi-Wan hates this. Yeah, of course he does, Troy. Where does he go? He's like, I can't watch this. It's disgusting. Did he park near here?

Is that why the battle concludes here? How does he get over here? He walked over there. We're a film so concerned about how people get to places. That was a great cut. I filmed it because Ewan was saying, let's film the part where I walk from here to there. I'm like, I'll film it, but there's no way I'm going to use it.

I'm going to do a hard cut from you walking over the top. Now she's nine months pregnant, by the way. All of a sudden. Okay, well, these are space pregnancies, for one thing. Yeah, just a real quick. It could. And look, she feels terrible right now. She can tell.

I have to admit, I kind of lied to you guys earlier in the evening. What? Okay. I said we were done with the fan fiction. No, come on, Griffin. What's happening? I went off easy at the beginning. I picked a very, very chase story.

Are we going to miss the end of the movie? I just think this is someone giving birth, which is the product of sex. It's topical at this scene in the movie. She's going to give birth to two major characters. Yeah, I mean, if Rachel Lang wants to get back up here, I did find a different story about Anakin and Padme,

and I felt like the last fan fiction segment didn't really play that well, so I asked two friends of mine, performers, actors, comedians, to come and sort of interpretively act out the sex acts

that I'm going to read. So if Rachel Lang can come to the stage, and also from our cousin podcast on the UCB Network, Murph Meyer, and Diana Kolsky from Menage a Trois. Hey, Diana. How are you guys doing? Nice to see you.

Sorry about this. So we're going to read a story for you right now that's called Taking Charge. And it's sort of one fan fiction writer's foray into the BDSM genre. I like to call it Fifty Shades of Padme. And it starts out the way that all good stories start out, with the writer saying, it starts out. And Rachel will take every other paragraph. It starts out with Anakin teasing Padme about her fighting abilities.

In spite of the many scrapes she's managed to get herself out of without Jedi protection or assistance, the fact that she put herself in the line of fire is irrelevant, she argues, because she took care of things herself. Her husband's reluctance to admit that she's capable of saving her own skin pisses her off. So there's no dialogue in this. Look. Look. Anakin says. And he starts putting his boots all over the expensive throw on her bed,

which doesn't help his cause. Oh, that's not... Okay. It's cute and everything that you want to help out. I just think you're better staying behind a desk. It's safer. His gaze is well-meaning, even a bit adoring, but Padme is feeling like she has something to prove. Suddenly, Anakin is being straddled.

Moves fast. He laughs, ignoring the annoyed expression on his wife's face. I love it when you get all feisty. He grins. Good, Anakin. Not answering, Padme starts digging in the top drawer of her nightstand. He grins. Good, Anakin.

Not answering, Padme starts digging in the top drawer of her nightstand. She pulls out a filmy scarf and begins winding it around the glove wrist of Anakin's robot hand. Anakin watches her, bemused. Soon both wrists are tied to separate posts. Anakin on his back, his head propped on a couple of Simmershulk pillow shams. He watches his wife dangle another scarf in front of him and cooperatively lifts his head so he can tie it around the back of his skull, effectively blindfolding him. This is great podcasting. No one listening to this will know what's happening

on stage. What does a senator need all these toys for? He asks, amused, cocksure. Padme slaps him abruptly across the face. It's open palm, but sharp and Anakin's mouth forms an O of surprise. You will speak only when spoken to, Padme tells him. And there is a husky tenor to her voice now. Anakin bites his lips, still unable to

stop grinning. Yes, m'lady, he answers. Padme growls and digs into his sides and he squirms. Ah, okay, no talking, he mutters. You're horrible at this, Annie, Padme complains, and Anakin can hear her clothing rustling. Loud clothes. He manages to stay quiet while she divests him of his outerwear as best she can by sliding and shoving it up and down. He knows his nipples are exposed when he feels Padme's perfectly manicured nails flicking one of them. He groans.

Padme shifts a bit and seems to be rummaging around again in her nightstand. A small sting lands between Anakin's pectorals. A croc, he guesses. And he moans openly, able to control himself, but knowing twirls. A crop, he guesses. And he moans, openly. Able to control himself, but knowing he doesn't

have to. Padme whips him along his torso and up and down his thighs. Her crop gets dangerously close to his penis, but seems to be carefully kept away. Do you like this? Padme asks, slash orders him in her senator voice. A hand

grabs his cock thoughtfully. You sure seem to be enjoying it. Yes, m'lady. Anakin feels Padme shift and realizes he can feel her bare legs and ass rubbing against his own naked skin. He smiles against his wife's mouth when she kisses him. I want you to eat me out, Annie, Padme says softly, close to his ear, her warm, sweet breath

tickling his cheek, not unpleasantly. She doesn't repeat her directions, simply moves forward until Anakin can smell the heady, musky scent of her crotch. It takes a moment to get the right rhythm, Anakin's, and balance, Padme's. Anakin can feel his wife squirm as she struggles not to sit on his face and neck outright

or to bear down too hard. Sorry! Anakin's tongue darts out, steady and methodical. Padme's pubic hair is tickling his nose. Padme quivers and moans as he licks her cunt. Gasping and clutching her husband's hair and shoulders and her own breasts as his tongue rubs against the tiny nub at the top of her slit. Anakin catches on quickly and begins concentrating on that specifically,

running his tongue in slow circular motions, breathing carefully so he doesn't asphyxiate. It's an arduous project, even though Padme is pretty well fired up. But Anakin has had to endure multiple hours of meditation with Master Yoda. And that's way less fun. And that's the

end of the fucking story. Big thanks to Dan Okolsky. Thanks, guys. Merv Meyer. Listen to Ménage à Trois on UCB radio. Thanks again to Rachel Lang. Just in time for Darth Vader. To rise.

Now, George, this is your least favorite word in the universe. That's right. I mean, it's a useful word. I understand there's context in which I'm in favor of it. A negatory. It should be listened to. The fact that he says at this point, that's to you a sign that he is irredeemably over on the dark side.

Well, because right now this is like the point in Midnight Cowboy where Jon Voight is like, give me the money. And Bob Allen's like, I don't have any money. So the Emperor is Bob Balaban in this scene. The Emperor is Bob Balaban in this scene. I see, and he's John Voight. He's like, but I did what you wanted, and I'm supposed to get money for it.

He's right. She was alive. And this is how John Voight felt when he realized he engaged in an oral sex act with Bob Balaban and wasn't even going to get paid for it. And so that's why right now he's going to say... He's going to turn to the dark side so that his wife wouldn't die, and she died anyway.

And look... How many times... Oh. so that his wife wouldn't die, and she died anyway. And look... You're wincing right now. Me? Yeah, you're shaking at the utterance of that word. I feel terrible for him. I feel terrible for Annie. Bad word. For Annie. Little Annie.

I should point out, because I think it's a good piece of writing that I'm really proud of, that during the sequence where sexual things were happening, Amidala died, and it was made very clear that, medically speaking, she was completely healthy. They don't know why she was dying. She had simply lost the will to live, is what a medical droid said. I think that's a good explanation, because we don't know why she died, except maybe she just didn't want to live anymore. I think that's a good explanation because we don't know why she died

except maybe she just didn't want to live anymore. You think it's a good explanation that the movie itself tells you that it doesn't know why something is happening? No, but they said she must have lost the will to live. So it did tell you. Should we go back to it? No.

No, we shouldn't go back. We just have to muscle through this. George, I'm just... I'm trying to get you to admit... You're not going to get to admit anything. ...that you feel that you're a hurt man. And I'm not saying you're a sad man. I'm feel that you're a hurt man. And I'm not saying you're a sad man.

I'm not saying you're a bad man. I am hurt that they won't let me, they won't use my ideas on the new movies, but I'm not, I don't have anything

but good feelings about this movie. I think these films are the product of your loneliness and your feeling of rejection from the world,

a world that didn't trust you and didn't support you. This is the third film people didn't like the first two. They loved the first two. These are a cry for help. Hey, listen, go to your web browser,

go to avclub.com and see how much people don't like these movies, okay? Griffin, the movie's almost over. I know, I just wanted to admit. That's why he's mad. He's like a child lashing out now. The same way that Anakin said hurtful things when he was mad.

You're mad now that the movie's about to end and you're worried you won't have a reason to keep watching it. But if I'm Anakin, you're Palpatine. No, I'm Yoda. Why are they wiping their memories? No, just C-3PO. Just C-3PO.

Not R2-D2. So R2-D2 remembers everything? Yes. So he can't tell anyone. He's trapped. In the next three movies, they don't know what happened? Good acting about to happen. Elephants pulling her casket.

Yeah, space casket. So Naboo, open casket funeral always? Yeah. Those are her parents? These are the only times we've seen a lot of citizens of Naboo. Sad. Very sad. Acting sad.

People say he's just a comedy character. That's devastating. Look how sad Jar Jar was. Elephant tails. And this is the one shot. Academy Award nominee, Keisha Castle-Hughes. This is her follow-up to being nominated for Best Actress for Whale Rider. Yeah. That's her whole

performance. Good choice. Did you shoot more with her that was cut out? No, that's all I needed. She's so good. Let's use her in small doses. Just a little bit of seasoning, just a little bit of spice right there to make the ending perfect. And now look at these ships. Really cool.

That is a good ship. I'll give him credit. It's okay. I like that ship. It could be better. And look, they've got new outfits. This looks great. They've got new outfits. I like this.

That was the first thing. So why did they switch to like Galaga computers? Like how did that happen so quick? Some of the technology looks very retro. Suddenly it's just lights. Just a lot of blinking lights. Yeah, it's just an aesthetic change. It's a little bit more Swedish, kind of like sparse.

Yeah. So you're saying that the Empire really refined design. He's a little bit like... A little grumpy. Not happy about this. And up until this point, all the people working... Folded his arms just the way the Jedi used to fold their arms. Yeah.

He doesn't look at the ground, though. Up until this point, everyone working for Palpatine has been a robot and suddenly he has a bunch of Germanic humans wearing Third Reiki uniforms. Pigs have changed. Darth Vader's now on board. He's got some new ideas. Do you get it, Griffin? These films are nothing but not subtle. Yeah. Wait, what's this scene?

This is the smith ship landing. Oh, this is where he's from. The baby. He's bringing... He gets one of the babies. So this is one of the lead characters of the new movie, Leia? Yeah, you'll see. That's his wife. He's bringing... He gets one of the babies. So this is one of the lead characters of the new movie, Leia. Yeah, you'll see. That's his wife. Remember when he talks about his wife before?

She is a peer. There she is. I drink too much. She is a peer. He'll take the girl because he has a wife. Okay, that's productive. George. But that's what he says. Me and my wife have always wanted a little girl. I'll take the girl. Is the next movie like Star Wars Babies? Is it like them as toddlers?

A little bit. But we flash forward a little bit. We jump into the future a little bit more. Now, I want to say this is pretty gorgeous. I like this. Yeah. Well, if you like this, you'll love the next movie. Really?

Yeah. It's more of this? Yeah, a lot more of this. This is good. It's very minimal. Are Uncle Owen and Aunt Beruna? Yeah, but they're older. Oh, that's cool, though.

Yeah, thank you. I'm cool. I'm pumped for the next movie. I've been telling you but they're older. Oh, that's cool, though. Yeah, thank you. I'm cool. I'm pumped for the next movie. I've been telling you this whole time. Yeah, you're super cool, George. Luke's in it. He's in the desert? Yeah, in the desert.

They're farming for moisture. He's a moisture farmer? He's a moisture farmer. Because, as I told you, energy is important. Here's Joel Edgerton. God, I gotta say, now knowing there's another film after this, I get chills looking at this ending. I know, it's good. Imagining what lies ahead. Look at the painted sunset there. God, and there are another film after this I get chills looking at this ending I know it's good

imagining what lies ahead there's a painted sunset there two suns I didn't even notice that Last Fantasy proudly presents TLF sub team Joel Edgerton right there

God I hesitate to say this but it does feel like there's a hope there's a fucking hope that things might yeah that part's new oh my god it's over

oh wow we did it! I can't believe you guys watched that. Jesus Christ. Rick McCollum. Can you make these at McCollum? Is Rick here? Rick, are you here? Rick?

Rick? Rick? Now let me... We have to go through the credits now too? Well, we're big fans of Billing Order. That is a big thing. Oh yeah, we like Billing Order. Trisha Bigger.

Trisha Bigger. Turn off the subtitles, Ben. They are not helping. Yeah, turn off the subtitles, Ben. What the hell is this? You know what? Casting by Christine King. Because the subtitles only have one credit.

They made it last all the time. MVP. MVP. And Burt killed it. Burt killed it on this movie. Sounds great. John Williams did a great job. Yeah, there you go.

Ewan McGregor first build. Wow. And then Portman. And then Portman. Yeah, everyone, if you like him, clap for him. Or your silence can speak volumes. Hayden. Christian Texford.

McDermott. Respectful silence. Yeah, McDermott's fourth. All right, all right. So then Sam Jack. And Frank Oz as Yoda.ot's fourth. Yeah, MacDermot's fourth. So then Sam Jack? And Frank Oz as Yoda. That's right. Post-Ark Smith.

And Chewbacca. Chewbacca gets weirdly on at best. Oh, wow. Oliver Ford Davies as Usayo Bibble. Silas Carson as Newt Gunray. With Samuel Jackson. Honestly. And Christopher Lee as Count Dooku.

Honestly. Yeah, that's a good guy. I couldn't make, honestly, I couldn't make these movies without Kenny Baker. He's the guy in the R2. He's in the R2. He's the little guy. He's the little guy. It's the one character we couldn't figure out how to, I mean, like, you gotta have him in there.

We've never been able to really judge his performance. Yeah, is he good? How hands-on was he in the development of that character? Very crucial. That's the one thing where, like, hopefully someday you'll be able to make an R2 performance in a whole movie completely without him inside. But right now, there's always at least one shot where you're like, gotta get him in there. Get in there.

Well, George, it sounds like this is the last Star Wars movie that you're ever gonna make make I mean probably I've said publicly that I'm going to make more movies But I'm not going to release them Jet Lucas I did say that in an interview I said that I'm going to make movies

And not release them Mousy McCollum Is that Rick McCollum's child Mousy that's a weird name Mousy's a great name. She is Mousy. If you still had control over the Star Wars franchise, what would you make next for it?

What would I make? Yeah. Oh, I almost don't even like thinking about that question, but I'd probably make one that was even funnier than anything I've done before. So you think comedy, that's the turn to take. I'd still probably be a space adventurer, but I'd do a Bib Fortuna movie.

We don't know who that is. No. Oh, yeah, we don't know who that is. Yeah, you don't know who it is. No, no, no, he's in Phantom Menace. He is? Yeah, he's Jabba the Hutt's secretary. That's a very, very peripheral character.

Well, he's a big, important character three movies from now. Okay, all right, looking forward to that. Make a movie about him. He's always getting his things stuck and stuff. He's got sort of a tail. Like, I would make

a Jar Jar Bib movie where Jar Jar and Bib go on the road. Like Midnight Run where Bib is very serious and Jar Jar keeps on trying to get a rise out of him.

Yeah. Bib's like, Jar Jar, you're a real doo-doo head. And Jar Jar's like, Misa, Misa want to be friends. Uh-huh. Okay, well, probably good that you got the billion dollars instead. Yeah, it was a toss-up between taking the billion dollars and making that movie.

Making that movie. I just want to ask you one last time, George. Sure. Do you have any regrets? Nope. What? Two and a half hours later, no regrets. Griffin, something's bothering you. What do you think I should regret? Nope. Two and a half hours later, no regrets.

Griffin, something's bothering you. What do you think I should regret? These movies are all hugely popular movies. There'd be any negativity that happened because of internet commenters and the Reddit crowd, Twitter, things like that, has been wiped away in the past two weeks with a flurry of online support for the prequels. One AV Club article for you negates 15 years. No, there were multiple articles last week.

I think there were two. Even articles that weren't about the prequels but dropping little references about how things like their... I'm paraphrasing, but these are great movies. Wasn't it more like they're not so bad wasn't that kind of the argument yeah because when you're negotiating you always don't take your exact stance

you work towards it why are you this defensive George I'm not I'm not the product of a wounded man I just want you to open up and tell me that you feel I'm not asking you to tell me that you're sad or you regret anything I want you to tell me that you're a human being with emotions George

Griffin I'm not a grown man with a little bag of toys that I already have. All right? I'm a billionaire who did everything I wanted. Griffin, Griffin. This is the last time we're going to talk about these prequels. He's raising a good point. He controlled me. Yeah, yeah.

He's got you. This is exactly where he wanted me the entire time. He wanted me here angry, on stage, doing his bidding, yelling with a bag of toys. Yeah, but it's going to be okay, Griff. Because we're going to do a new Hope. I do like they have that Chewbacca Furby. Have you seen that?

No, there's a Chewbacca Furby. Everyone seen that? The Target? This guy's nodding. You've seen it? There's a Chewbacca Furby. So, like, hope is not lost. I didn't have anything to do with that, but that's one thing I looked at and thought, nice.

That's a good move. You're happy about that. A Chewbacca Furby. The legacy continues. I did try some Go-Gurt the other night. There was some Star Wars Go-Gurt that you can get for the new movie. It tasted pretty good. And they make it look like a lightsaber on the packet.

That's smart. Special thanks to Nokia and Dell. George, I... That's the last box. It's over. Do you know what I'm going to say? You're sorry and you like these movies? You have given us 36

episodes of podcasts. Yeah, that's right. I mean, few movies could sustain this much. It's been ups and it's been downs, but I guess at the end of the day, I have to say thank you, George. Thanks, George. May the force be with you.

Yeah, thanks, George. Thanks, Griffin. Thank you, David. Yeah. And above all else, a big thanks to producer Ben. Of course. And Ben Dusser. Here's his desktop for you right now.

That's right. Beautiful. There's a lot of stuff right now. That's right. Beautiful. There's a lot of stuff. Hooker loves what? Hooker loves Special Edition? Baby Roll Dummy? What's that? Baby Bomb.

Ah, you unplugged it. The FBI is on their way. Oh my God. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that the movie Strange Magic is available on DVD. Okay. And high definition download. You can buy it on iTunes. It's a lot of fun. god i'd be remiss if i didn't mention that the movie strange magic is available on dvd okay and high definition download you can buy it on itunes it's a lot of fun and you still host a talk show at the upright citizens brigade theater you do yeah i do that but i mean strange magic is what i'm here to promote that's the main thing this is part of your tour your promotional tour

it's a record breaker right box office record breaker box office records. Okay. It was the lowest grossing animated film to be released on 3,000 screens. That's true. Did everyone like the movie? I do want to ask. Did everyone like the movie? George, this is not... We don't have time to get answers from everybody.

I'm willing to take a question and answer about how much... We're not doing a question... These people have been here for over two hours, George. We're not doing a question and answer. I don't see anyone getting up. I don't see anyone leaving. These people are so... Everyone's wearing their jackets.

Let me ask this. Producer Ben, is it possible to start it up again while we're watching it again? Absolutely not. We're out of here. Thank you very much,

George Lucas. Thank you all for coming out. Thanks, guys. Two weeks we're back with a new podcast. Thank you.