Blocks w/ Neal Brennan - Kevin Nealon

Episode Date: March 5, 2026

Neal Brennan interviews Kevin Nealon (SNL, Weeds, Happy Gilmore) about ADHD, Johnny Carson, mirroring, SNL, painting, Lorne Michaels, death, Chris Farley, claustrophobia, Dana Carvey, defibrillators, ...Adam Sandler, Irish accents, Garry Shandling, his documentary, Anthony Bourdain, family, Larry David, relationships, Robin Williams, Jan Hooks, standup comedy, Steve Martin, sketch comedy, David Letterman, and possible dementia. Subscribe to  @KevinNealoncomedy  Art: https://kevinnealonart.com/ Book: https://www.abramsbooks.com/product/i-exaggerate_9781419761980/ Oscar-nominated Documentary: https://tv.apple.com/us/movie/come-see-me-in-the-good-light/umc.cmc.27uh51l7oh3ghql2gxb6xvb1s 00:00 Intro 1:42 Irish Catholic 5:13 ADD 8:10 Mirroring 9:54 Long career 12:14 Pre-SNL Career 19:02 Sponsor: Huel 21:29 Sponsor: BetterHelp 23:34 SNL 35:00 Relationships & Family 40:00 Anthony Bourdain 42:53 Claustrophobia 49:44 Come See Me In The Good Light Documentary 50:55 Sponsor: SuperPower 53:34 Sponsor: Squarespace 55:28 Sponsor: RoSparks 58:06 Death 1:01:45 Celebrity Anecdotes Thanks to our sponsors! Limited Time Offer – Get Huel today with my exclusive offer of 15% OFF online with my code NEAL at huel.com/NEAL . New Customers Only. Thank you to Huel for partnering and supporting the show! Visit https://www.BetterHelp.com/NEAL for 10% off. Head to Superpower.com and use code [NEAL] at checkout for $20 off your membership. Live up to your 100-Year potential. #superpowerpod Check out https://www.squarespace.com/NEAL to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code NEAL. Get harder, longer-lasting erections with Ro Sparks: $15 off first order of medication to get hard at https://www.ro.co/BLOCKS ---------------------------------------------------------- Follow Neal Brennan: https://www.instagram.com/nealbrennan https://twitter.com/nealbrennan https://www.tiktok.com/@mrnealbrennan Watch Neal Brennan: Crazy Good on Netflix: https://www.netflix.com/title/81728557 Watch Neal Brennan: Blocks on Netflix: https://www.netflix.com/title/81036234 Theme music by Electric Guest (unreleased). Edited by Will Hagle ---------------------------------------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 I guess today, I've been a fan of this guy since, I don't know, 88. Let's go over the big credits. S&L. Hello, Mr. Subliminal. Thank you, Dennis. Haircut. You know, there's so many. Weeds.
Starting point is 00:00:12 Can I get you a drink guru, Doug? Thank you, cinnamon. I would like watermelon juice. Happy Gilmore. The harness into good energy, block out the bad. Harness, energy, block bad. Feel the flow happy. Feel it.
Starting point is 00:00:26 I feel like you're in a lot of, you were in a lot of movies in the late 80s, early 90s, that like were you in pretty woman yes i play the julia roberts part you i feel like you probably read for it how is it double in the tubble in the tub i did read for it um did you i bet you did i bet you read for the for the larry miller part i am mr hollister the manager and he's a hilarious fucking comedian and he's got a a a book a book called uh i exaggerate which is it's uh my my brushes with fame and it's uh those are there's a there's a There's a few double entendres there, at least one that I know. Well, there's one double, which is my brushes with fame, which is double entendre.
Starting point is 00:01:08 One entendre means he's sketching them. It's his sketchbook. And there you go. There's Romney Malick. Romney Malick, who I saw at Whole Foods. Can I jump into the conversation? No. Okay.
Starting point is 00:01:22 And it's Kevin, you're going to be. It's exciting, isn't it? And it's Kevin Neeland, ladies and gentlemen a truly one of the one of the fastest guy I don't want to put that kind of pressure right I'm going to put your letter you are very you're wet it's quick you know I think it's the same with you I think um Irish Catholic a lot of kids in your family when I went to Ireland I got on the plane going home and I was exhausted I thought why am I so tired and it was the battle of the wits being there you know the Irish always
Starting point is 00:01:59 trying to one up you yes did you find that it's a little it is a little much right it's a lot like it's a lot of like similar everyone's kind of your cousin yeah like everyone kind of feel and it's the hostility of family yeah um thank god well we don't have to do that again huh well i have my irish passport so i can go to i live there motherfucker you're acting like i don't you have one too i got the i got the i haven't done the thing but i got the birth i got like the citizenship we She's going into a podcast. I would love to do that. Can you do an Irish accent?
Starting point is 00:02:32 I'm not, not, I'm not going, not that you, now that you put me in the, in a corner. I wanna take, you know, I'm done trying to learn a language. I'm to the point now where, maybe it's better just to learn that. Dialogue the accent. It's like not through a lingo, just, yeah, just do lingo. Just, just, just, just, uh, just offensive, offensive impression. Yeah, I was about,
Starting point is 00:02:58 to do my Irish accent, but I cannot do it. I should be able to, I can speak German. You can speak accent? Well, no, I can speak German. You can actually speak German. I could speak German. How? I lived in Germany when I was six until I was 10.
Starting point is 00:03:12 Huh, how come? Oh, like the countryside. You don't have an answer. I do have an answer. My father worked for a helicopter company in Germany. That's right so far, go ahead. And so they had a contract with a German company. This is during the war.
Starting point is 00:03:28 Sure. And so, yeah, so we lived in a German neighborhood. Most of the military people lived on the basis. And that was mostly, you know, military people there. And so all my friends are German, so I got to speak fluent German pretty quickly. Fluent is, I mean, are 10-year-olds, or eight-year-olds speak? That's when you learn. No, you're the most malleable.
Starting point is 00:03:50 That's the hottest time. Yeah. Our age, just do the accent, just do a fake, just do an offensive accent. Here's the thing. When I was in high school, people said, take Spanish. It's easiest. And I said, yeah, no, I'll do that later. So I was learning French.
Starting point is 00:04:07 So three years ago, I said, I'm learning Spanish, man. I don't care how old I am. I started learning a lot of stuff, or trying to, about three years ago, piano, you know, sketching and Spanish. So I took this, three years, I took lessons with this woman in Mexico City, Zoom. And, but I wouldn't study. I would just do the lessons twice a week.
Starting point is 00:04:27 And I thought, I'm going in Spanish, but then I did it for three years, and I realized I'm not learning anything. You did Zoom? Yeah. Spanish. Zoom Spanish. Yeah, with a Mexican woman, Mexico City. All right.
Starting point is 00:04:39 So I couldn't retain it like I thought I would be able to. I thought, hey, I told you that was the way to do it. Well, I tried those dualingo things and, you know, all the other books and, you know, recordings. I just, it wasn't, I zone out. You ever do that? You're reading a book. All of a sudden you realize, hey, I'm thinking about something else.
Starting point is 00:04:55 Where am I? What page am I on? Yeah. What did I just read? Yeah. It's like watching a film now. And I was watching a Matt Damon interview. Did you see this?
Starting point is 00:05:03 He goes, you know, it's so crazy with films now because they have to keep reminding what the plot is because people go on their phones and then they come back to it. Yeah. So I've always been like that. My attention. You've had ADD from before it was cool. My wife says I have ADD or ADHD. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:19 She threw another letter in there. But I think she's right. I put the milk carton in the cupboard the other day. That could just be. age. That's distraction. You think it's distraction? Because I did a fundraiser for Alzheimer's and they had a bunch of neuroscient, neuroscient, neuropathicist there. Yeah. And I asked one of them, I said, look, here's what I've been doing. I believe in the stove on. You pulled them apart. You pulled them aside? Yeah, I did. Give it to me straight. I left the stove on occasionally. I sometimes leave the car running because they're
Starting point is 00:05:53 quiet and I had an electric car for a while. It's in the shop now. We're going to put a gas engine in it. But, so, yeah, so, you know, I was doing things like that. Did you really leave the stove on? Well, my wife said I did. It's not that quiet. Oh, is it gas? Yeah. That doesn't make a lot of noise.
Starting point is 00:06:15 It's not nothing. The pilot when you turn on goes, yeah, but. We're gonna start a thing where we do sound effects and offensive accents. You don't learn how to repair it. you just learn how to do stove and then people call you and go, I need a stove and you go, is it going?
Starting point is 00:06:32 Yeah. Anyway, the neuro, the neuro, what do you call it? Neurophysicist. Neurophysicist. Neurophysicist earlier, which I let's lie. Neurologist. She said that is distraction. It's total distraction.
Starting point is 00:06:47 People do that a lot. They put the milk in the cupboard. They leave the baby out in the car. That would be back. That would be back. It's 80 days. It's not homicide. It's ADD, whatever.
Starting point is 00:06:57 So I was relieved to hear that. And but my wife still wants me to go in and be tested for dementia. For dementia. It's jumping. Dementia? That's a, that's a pretty cold. It's like burping and somebody say,
Starting point is 00:07:11 you gotta go in and check your heart. It's not indigestion. Like, are you sure? Yeah, that's a real, she, that's, there's something hostile about that. Do you have, I know you're like, what are you 65? Easily. Do you have a, you ever think about getting? a defibrillator to have in your car in your house you got one just like under the under
Starting point is 00:07:32 the front seat of the car yeah yeah just to travel one between the mattress yeah yeah just give you five yes you five bumps defibrillate yourself i like the idea of i like the idea of uh taking out a defibrillator if somebody's boring you to put on that person you go either i can do it or you can do it but this conversation needs to improve real quick yeah I'm not for small talk yeah I'm not for small listening but what here's my bad habit that I have one of them is when someone comes up to me and they'll say hello whatever I match their enthusiasm it must be really annoying to them you you go big can you go whatever they're going with if they come up they go hey man how's it I go, good, how you doing?
Starting point is 00:08:19 Yeah. But if they go, oh, my God's going to see. I go, oh, God's going to you too. Are you, does that make you a phony? No, I'm just trying to get on the same level with that person. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Mirroring.
Starting point is 00:08:32 Mirroring. Mirroring. That's kind of Irish. Mirroring. Mirroring. We're not doing it. So, yeah, so that's what I do. You know, people say you could, there's neurolinguistic programming, which is try to match someone's
Starting point is 00:08:46 body language. Yeah. It makes them. comfortable. Oh. And then if you really want to take it to the next level, breathing. So something to think about. Here's something that's really annoying that I like to do.
Starting point is 00:08:59 It's similar to mirroring, but it's more echoing. Okay. So I'll give you an example. Tell me about your, tell me about your day yesterday. Yesterday. Okay. Okay. There are people.
Starting point is 00:09:15 Right. Okay. there's a similar thing where people will do this with their mouth you'll talk and they'll mouth along with you which is like what are what's happening actors do that yeah scenes is really annoying well there that's like yes but people do it in real life they do like what are you basing it's not at least an actor knows what you're going to say they don't know the lines i that's what i mean it's like it's a i've caught people doing it you do it to me show me what you mean so yes I had a pretty easy day.
Starting point is 00:09:48 I didn't do much. Isn't it? It's like they're chewing gum. Yeah, no, it's like, it's crazy. It's like, hey man, what are you doing? Yeah, you'll see it. Now you'll see it. All right, should we start?
Starting point is 00:09:59 Yeah, let's start. All right, here's what I'm interested in you about. Long career, great career. Still going. Still going. You have a new YouTube special called Loose in the Crotch, which I don't think is true. I think you have a proportional penis.
Starting point is 00:10:18 You know what? I haven't seen anyone else's penis. You've never seen anyone else's penis? I've never seen just on my son when he was born. What about and you never saw your son's penis again? Never again. Is that I mean I'm with you. No. You didn't change a diaper. No we have people for that. Great. They're Irish Catholic. Yeah, great. Okay. It seems like proportional. That's fine. fine well I'll leave it at that um you know when they say the average a the average length of
Starting point is 00:10:50 penises what they say no yeah what somebody said I don't know who it was it's doctors it's like when they say you know you need 10,000 steps yeah well that's made up that's made up yes um with the penis stuff you think it's made up I don't like they're saying it's a should it's just the average how many how do they get the average number though how many people do they survey you know what's a great point because it's in what country they wouldn't have measured Well, there is one by country, which is pretty, pretty funny. What do you mean by? If you like stereotypes, penis size by country.
Starting point is 00:11:23 It's pretty entertaining. What would you say? Number one country is. And you're going to feel racist, just FYI. You're not going to be racist, but you're going to feel it. Does it start? Guess. A.
Starting point is 00:11:41 Continent wise? I'm not doing this. with you. Okay, let's go. But, okay, so. It's Ireland. Long story short. Spoiler alert. Okay, so long career, great career, have you enjoyed it? Every minute of it.
Starting point is 00:11:58 You do like being a comedian, right? I like being a comedian, an actor, a writer, a director, all that stuff. You know, but here's, I think you're along these same lines. I developed a really thick skin, starting on SNL. You can't take anything personally. What were you doing? How long were you a comic before SNL?
Starting point is 00:12:18 I was a comic for eight years. Okay. So you started in 78? Six years. Yeah, I don't even remember. Some comics go, yeah, I started October 17th, 188. I have no idea. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:33 I don't know how many tonight shows I did. Kevin Nealand. You know, I didn't always want to be a comedian. I remember a long time ago I wanted to be a veterinarian. What happened was this baby bird fell out of the tree? you know, and I brought them in the house, and I nursed them back to health. And I remember about a month after that, my nipples were really sore, you know. You really don't?
Starting point is 00:12:56 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know how many I did with Johnny Carson. It's actually, and the truth is, it does not matter. It's also seven guys like, I did 14, 10, and I was like, okay. That doesn't matter. I don't remember the day I took, I don't remember that, but I remember the day I took Johnny Carson's name off my resume because it was too dated.
Starting point is 00:13:14 Yeah. You were friends with Johnny, right? No. We were friendly because I would be on the show. Didn't you play poker with him? Were you a part of that? No, I sat in his seat that he used to play him before he died. That's way different than what I thought.
Starting point is 00:13:27 You just spread that around? You just sat in his seat? Yeah, what's that name? Where he wasn't there? Where he used to sit. He died and then you replaced it? Yeah, I replaced him for a couple of games. Was there a lot of pressure to fill in to be that, was it like, was it like, well?
Starting point is 00:13:41 No, because I had good writers. You know, I had a lot of good writers. Your poker writers? They had really great poker. jokes yeah you'd get i don't want to raise here they'd be right trust that johnny would have raised yeah i i i said poker scares me how come i did the celebrity um poker tournaments remember they have fun rangers yeah i didn't even know what if a straight beat a flush and my dentist her husband was a poker guy so i said can you can he write down what beats what was yeah so she brings in to me
Starting point is 00:14:09 the whole time i had the thing under the table i won like a hundred and twenty thousand dollars really god yeah for my turn for my charity imagine if you know how to play pop How much you could help people? Well, you know, sometimes I think it's just blind innocence. Nativity, just going in there. You are innocent, if nothing else. Okay, so then you get SNL, and then you feel like you develop, you were doing well as a comedian, you were making a living.
Starting point is 00:14:35 Yeah, I was traveling, I was doing the road. You know, I was working on the road. Did you mind doing the road back then? No, no. Not a ton of money back then, but like enough? No, but you know what it was. I'm sure you were at the, point too is you would work stand-up comedy from Tuesday
Starting point is 00:14:50 through Sunday and Monday was the travel day and that's when you saw the comics and airports where you going oh I'm going to Dowell yeah oh yeah I'm going up to you know New York yeah and you talk they talk about the club or whatever and it was really interesting because that was when it was a lot more of a novelty to and you like wouldn't know how a club was you probably like just have a piece of paper with the address and go like someone might pick you up at the airport Yeah, get there.
Starting point is 00:15:18 Okay, so, and then things start going well. You get SNL and you have to develop thick skin. Were you, did you, you literally develop thicker skin. Yeah. Quickly. I mean, you have to survive in this business. You have to. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:32 I don't take things personally anymore. You know, maybe at first I was, you know, if I didn't pass, like, getting it at the comedy, on the comedy store, I would feel a little hurt. But now it's like, I get it. It's a business. I get it. I get it. I'm not going to take it personally.
Starting point is 00:15:46 Okay. Let's say I assume I buy your premise of that it's a business. Oh, it's not for sale. I'm buying. I bought it. It's costly. Don't feel bad of it. Don't think it personally. If it is a business, don't you get mad when people don't think your would be good for business? No. No. You don't get mad. You don't get it. It's their project. You know, you can pick, if it were my project and I saw somebody that I liked, but they just weren't right for it.
Starting point is 00:16:13 I'm not going to put somebody on my project. And it goes, It takes a nose dive. Because to be nice. You don't get a lot of shots. Right. So you don't, so you think it's basically fair. Oh yeah. And I like to be nice.
Starting point is 00:16:26 I don't like to hurt people's feelings. You know, a lot of times, it took me a long time to learn how to say no to people. And to this point, I still beat around the bush, but I do eventually get to the no thing. How do you say it? I'll say something like, I'm not sure that we are starting this project this year.
Starting point is 00:16:44 And we haven't really decided on who we're going to use. but you are in that area. I'm not saying no right now. So the way you say no is by saying I'm not saying no. At this point. Right, at this juncture. Yeah. It is a possibility.
Starting point is 00:17:05 In terms of the future of the project, we're, it's up in the air and TBD. A lot of that, a lot of double-shed. Yeah. But I mean, we are. big fans of yours? People hate you for it, by the way. They think, you think that you, it's taking you a long time.
Starting point is 00:17:25 People, and like you're a good guy and you don't want to make people feel bad, but people really don't like it. I tell you, I asked Larry David, I was doing one of those new material nights at the Laugh Factory. Sure. And I said, Larry, do you want to do this thing? You know, I texted him. He texted me back.
Starting point is 00:17:42 No, I don't want to do it. There's no like, hey, you know, I wish I could, but, you know. I have a Larry David story where I had lunch with them and somebody and then he was like he called and was like hey friend of his wanted was wondering if I could do a thing and I was like yeah I mean if it's like if it's a like if it's a favorite of you I'll do it and there's a beat and he goes you think I give a fuck if you do this you think I give a fuck and it was like you think I give a fuck and it was like It was in a Prius and it was like perfect acoustic Prius and he's like him just screaming, you think I give a fuck if you do this and it's like one of the greatest moments of my comedy life. Wow, that's crazy.
Starting point is 00:18:29 You imagine being at that level where you could just be totally honest with people. Yeah, you know. By the way, the Prius is the best acoustical car, you know. Because it's not well built. It's not well built, but the design of it is spectacular for audio. It's a wonder it even drives its car.
Starting point is 00:18:47 It's more of a amphitheater. They should enlarge it like a million times the size it is now and have like a sphere but the shape of the Toyota. Yeah, we agree. Guys, you get to learn a lot about my habits on this show, my eating, some of my toilets, whatever. It's a lot too much. And you know by now, you know that I don't always,
Starting point is 00:19:13 during the day I'm not dying to eat. I'll go grab a salad. or I'll chug one of my hules. My old hules. Look, there's bottle. It's the black edition. And I've got the powder version of it. I like to mix up vanilla and chocolate.
Starting point is 00:19:31 Shaky, shaky, shaky, shaky, mostly vanilla. Let's give 70% vanilla, 30% chocolate. Glug, glug, glug. Gone. I can go, do what I got to do. You guys know that I only care about comedy at this point in my life. I keep saying that over and over. Sometimes I do, there is a gym in my building.
Starting point is 00:19:46 I will, if I'm going to go for it, I'll go for the powder. I'll put some powder in the vanilla, it's chocolate powder, shake that up. And it's a perfect. I was doing it before they sponsored this show, guys. I manifested it. It just saves time. Saves time. I also don't want to think about it.
Starting point is 00:20:07 My girl's got a kid. I mentioned that all the time. The amount of meal planning you have to do as a parent is bananas. And I don't want to have to do it for myself, which is, again, Another great thing about Hewle. Gwark. Here's what's going on with Hewle. 35 grams of protein.
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Starting point is 00:20:46 Don't think about it. Live your life. Live the life you want to lead that doesn't evolve. Then we got to stop in. Guys, are you ready for the call to action? Here it is. Are you ready? Here it comes.
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Starting point is 00:21:40 caring for others and managing unseen responsibilities. Their emotional well-being can easily be overlooked. We want to remind women how much they matter and that therapy offers a space for them to take care of themselves in the way they deserve. I want to give a shout to my lady. She's the best, most loving spirit I've ever met. I waited and I waited and I waited and I waited
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Starting point is 00:23:38 Okay, so thick skin. So you didn't have the S&L thing where you're mad all the time. You're on anxiety pills. You're on. Neil, I was so happy to be there. It came like at the last minute for me. I was roommates, kind of roommates with Dana Carvey. We've been friends for a long time and he lived in the garage above our house
Starting point is 00:23:55 when he was in town. He had a studio apartment up there. And we just kind of jamming the driveway and just stupid characters. Yeah. And he gets on the show and then he recommends me to learn because I need one more person. That's his first year? Yeah, I mean, it hasn't even started yet.
Starting point is 00:24:11 It's the summer. Ballsy. To go like, you know, he was hanging out with Lauren and he felt comfortable and, you know, he used, he recommended me and I'm like, well, really? I've never even done sketch comedy. Yeah. It's all they ever wanted to be a stand-up.
Starting point is 00:24:26 And so I took advantage of the opportunity. I flew in, I did the audition and that's why I got it. And art, did you do like impressions and characters? No impressions at all. I did my stand-up from the tonight show. And you ended up doing like well-known. Yeah, I mean, I did a couple of, I did two characters that Dane and I used to do in the driveway, you know, just messing around. And one of them was these two porn actors. Okay. That were, is that okay with you? Okay. Okay, go ahead.
Starting point is 00:24:57 They're in their, you know, they're in the director's chairs and they're getting made up, you know, in the whole genital area. But they're not really, there's such pros, they don't even, you know, didn't even notice that. They didn't know me even talking about it. You know, they do it every day. And so they're just talking about mundane things. Like, Jerry, you, did you, did you go to the event nice night?
Starting point is 00:25:18 That's right, Judy. Yeah, put a little pinstripes on the side for the people. Because I went to this event yesterday, and I'm telling you, the food they have there. Yeah, a little powder puff on the tip and just a little bit of sparkles, maybe, for the people. Everything was for the people. So that was one character's.
Starting point is 00:25:35 Did it get laughs in the room? I don't remember. I don't remember. You know, they're very sympathetic because they know the pressure you're under. It's also, yeah, it's awful. It's an awful. But now I think you've got to do like,
Starting point is 00:25:47 seven people. 25 characters and 17 accents. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But back then, they were just looking for the chemistry at that point, because this was the year after, they call it the weird year. Yep. And I think people are all talented,
Starting point is 00:25:58 but they just didn't have the synergy with the writers. So I did that stuff, and they were all kind of, you know, giving me maybe some courtesy laughs, too. But they wanted to do it. of the chemistry there and I was dating Jan Hooks at the time. Oh, you were? Yeah. She was just funny. She was just like, Jan Hooks. A funny person. The funniest woman I've ever met. We were great friends for six years. Should have left it at that. And then we started dating. We were a year into dating. We both got an SNL. And her mother had just died. Couldn't, I can't think of a worse thing
Starting point is 00:26:29 to happen to a relationship than you both get SNL. Horrible. So she'd gotten it and then Dana was like, she was up for it. Got it. And so they were stringing her along and then her mother died. So he went to the funeral and Georgia. And did anyone suspect foul play? Yeah, that's why they were stringing her along.
Starting point is 00:26:46 They wanted to see what happened in the courts. Yeah, so anyway, I got on right before her, and then they brought her on. So we had that chemistry. We can make this joke because she's dead too. So go ahead. Yeah, we had that chemistry and then Dana and I had the chemistry. And I knew Dennis a little bit,
Starting point is 00:27:01 but I didn't know anybody else on there. So that's kind of after that weird year. Well, they didn't, you didn't, you weren't on camera in the audition for chemistry reads, right? No, but they just knew that I was friends with Dana and they have, they're having, they're having sex and they probably have some kind of chemistry. Yeah, yeah, it was biology and chemistry, a whole bunch of, uh, so yeah, so I got on the show and I was hired as a feature player and a writer the first year and they guarantee me seven episodes. And did you know, had you written a sketch in your life?
Starting point is 00:27:30 Never wrote a sketch, never came up with a character. Yep. Perfect. You're hired. So I did, I did every episode. I did every, you know, every episode, 22 I was on and I wrote. Did you get sketches on as a writer? Yeah, I got a lot. The first week I got Mr. Subliminal I had written. Oh, yeah. That was a, you did it on an update? No, it was a sketch with John Lunditson, Victoria Jackson. Your subliminal advertising campaign was due yesterday. Oh, boy, the subliminal advertising campaign.
Starting point is 00:27:58 Geez, I forgot all about that. Your fault. But I'm here now, so I might as well go see it. I learned about subliminal advertising because I have a degree in marketing, so I learned about that in college. And so I wrote this with Al Franken, because I used to do it in my act. It was more of like a tagging thing. You know, I would talk to somebody.
Starting point is 00:28:15 I'd be talking to a, you know, somebody in the front row loser. And I would talk to them and kind of slip words in there every once in a while and try to get things that I wanted, you know, like, you know, we should get together and go out to dinner one night of your treat and just, you know, have a good time, you know? Yeah. So I did that and it was a big kid.
Starting point is 00:28:30 I remember I was nervous before going out, course and what you do to calm yourself you know you have some routines rituals you that you do i'm sure um i just said nobody's watching this show anymore you know we live out of our suitcase every week because we we're ready for it to be canceled yeah and maybe after 10 episodes when they finally said okay man it's back um that i take it up but i remember about to go on 10 seconds away from coming back from the commercial Lauren Michaels comes up to me the creator of the show and he puts his hand on my shoulder and he goes are you sure this is what you want and my head i'm going no i'm not sure this is where people have say bad stuff about or like he's an asshole whatever but like that's
Starting point is 00:29:15 very funny to me yeah no it's like i'm did it make did it relax yeah it's funny it did because he wasn't nervous and he was out kidding you know but i really get i get his sense of humor and it's and i i really like the guy i do too and again i had a rough year with him once where I may not have been coming back. You know, he's kind of stringing me when you were doing an update. Oh, before update. Before update. It's so funny that people that like, oh yeah, I was gone more or less and then then I
Starting point is 00:29:43 started hosting an update. Yeah. It's kind of what happened to Seth Myers too. Is it? Yeah. Yeah. And like a lot of people, I got pushed out of the show. You know, they gave a week and update to Norm.
Starting point is 00:29:55 And then I knew that was my last year. And luckily I had another show to go to. It was called Champ. It was the first show that, um, um, imagine that was doing, Steven Spielberg as their first foray into sitcoms. So I was excited about that. Yeah. But Don Olmeier, who was the head of NBC at the time, um, he pushed Norm out and Jim Downey, who was the writer. Did he push you out?
Starting point is 00:30:20 Got me off. Yeah. So he was like, I don't want you. And then Norm came in and he was like, I don't want him either. Eventually. And they wanted Farley out, Adam Saller out. Yeah. So we all went out pretty much.
Starting point is 00:30:33 But I was kind of, I didn't make a big deal about it, you know, and I just went and did the sitcom that didn't last. And Norm eventually got pushed out because of all the O.J. jokes. According to retailers, the most popular Halloween mass this year is O.J. Simpson. And the most popular Halloween greeting is, I'll kill you and that guy who's bringing over your glasses or a trait. If you read the book, Lorne, it talks a lot about all of these things. The book just came out.
Starting point is 00:31:00 That's, the book is called Lorne. Yeah, it has a reversible cover. And, um, by the way, Neil, I, people were asking me, where can I get, where can I buy one of these paintings? And I finally developed a website. Developed. Kevin, yeah, I developed it. Like a rash. No, no, like Steve Jobs developed the iPhone.
Starting point is 00:31:20 Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So it's Kevin Neal and art.com and a portion of the proceeds go to L.A. Children's Hospital. Great. And people can go there if they want to buy a book. I mean, buy a painting. How much? I don't want to talk about it.
Starting point is 00:31:35 Okay. No, it's different prices. Okay, you know. Okay. So what, so you never got your feelings hurt, you never. Oh, no, I've got my feelings. No, no, I'm saying on the show you never got your. I would be disappointed and angry sometimes, sure,
Starting point is 00:31:51 like if a sketch didn't get on, that really got a big, you know, reaction. Yeah. But, you know, and then after a while, I learned. For me, I was just happy to be on that show. Yeah. I thought, what am I doing here? There's people at the groundlings that do tons of characters, and here I am a stand-up.
Starting point is 00:32:07 Was everybody like, because Dana was so charactery and Mike Myers. But, but I'm saying, like, Dana did Church Lady the first episode, right? From his act. And that crushed. Well, isn't that special? From his act, yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:22 And then what, that's first sketch up after the monologue. I think maybe that was his first sketch. When were you on? Do you remember when subliminal, Mr. Subliminal was on? For a show. But I'm saying like. Oh, we're in the run, yeah. I don't remember.
Starting point is 00:32:36 See, I don't remember those things, those little things like. How many Tonight Show have you done? Don't answer. 17 and a half. I got kicked off of one of them. Wow. Took a swing and shot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:47 So anyway, it worked out for me. I liked doing it. And it was more of a marathon for me. A lot of people wanted to get in there and be a big hit and get a movie career. I'm just lucky to be there. Yeah. I can't believe I'm, you know, I'm watching. McJagger Rehearse.
Starting point is 00:33:01 Yeah. Thursday or Friday night. I'm watching Paul McCartney, James Taylor, all these people that I grew up loving. And you, did you have big showbiz dreams? Like, where'd you grow up?
Starting point is 00:33:13 In Connecticut. And was it like? And Germany for four years. And of course, who can forget Germany in the helicopter industry? Of a natuity. And did you, what did you?
Starting point is 00:33:25 So when you started doing Santa, was it just like, eh, I'll see, this is better than having a job. No, no, no. That's all I wanted to do was stand-up. Oh, from the time you ever kid. Stand-up. Yeah. Got it. Well, I wanted to be like, and then we're going to talk about you a little bit. I wanted to be a singer-songwriter. Oh, right. Because I played the guitar, and I was in some garage bands. But that was too difficult. I felt intimidated. I felt insecure singing on stage because they never had lessons or anything. And stand-up, I loved. I would
Starting point is 00:33:51 get the TV guide at the time. They had TV guide. Do they have that when you were going up? And I would highlight every comedian that was going to be on different talk shows. And it'd be like George Miller, you know, Stanley and Iron Handelman, all these comics, I would not miss them. So I always wanted to do stand-up, because I would see them come out and do five minutes. And I go, that's their job.
Starting point is 00:34:09 Then they're done, yep. I want to do that because I got a million dollars for what they just said. I worked in a factory for two years, a helicopter factory that my father worked for. And it was good money. I would have stayed there, I think, a long time. Had not the foreman come over to me one day and go,
Starting point is 00:34:27 what's a young guy like you doing, and working in a place like this. I said, oh, I'm just paying off my college loan. I'm getting some money to go travel around Europe with my buddy. And he looked off, he goes, yeah, that's what I said 20 years ago. I quit like two weeks later. That's it. That's so cinematic.
Starting point is 00:34:42 I got a job in another factory. Had a better helicopter factory. Did you, okay, so, and what's your, this show was supposed to be about, you know, people's psychological problems? Do you have any psychological problems? Well, ADHD. ADHD, of course, which we covered pretty in-depth. I don't think I do, man.
Starting point is 00:35:07 You've been married twice? Yeah. And out of order, though. Whatever that means. You've been married twice. And did you, would you, what happened the first time and what happened the second time? Well, the first time we got divorced. It just didn't.
Starting point is 00:35:24 The second time was lasting. What happened on the, why did you get divorced? I got divorced for several reasons. I mean, it's just, we had things, we didn't have things in common eventually. You realized that. Yeah. Like she wanted a kid originally. Right.
Starting point is 00:35:39 As died. And then two years into it, she woke up and crying and said she didn't want a kid. Yep. And because I was raised Catholic, Irish Catholic, divorce was not on the table. Yep. So I stayed with her for, I don't know, eight or nine years after that. And then there was some problems with her relationship with my family. and that didn't help.
Starting point is 00:36:01 And eventually, yeah, she just drifted from it. Do you get along with your family? Oh, yeah, yeah. Great. I'm really close to my family. My parents have passed, but yeah, my brothers and sisters, I have five, I just realized I have a, discovered I have a half-brother two years ago.
Starting point is 00:36:14 That must have been, how come, who did what? Oh, well, 23 of me. I'm with my sister because I don't check 23 of me, because, you know, how it is, there's always like, hey, I think. It's like Twitter once you go on there. Yeah, yeah. I found out I have three half-brothers from Twitter. and from TikTok I have seven.
Starting point is 00:36:33 Did you, how do you find, literally you found out, your dad did some. Yeah, yeah, before he was married though. And never told anybody. He didn't know. Oh, wow. He didn't know.
Starting point is 00:36:45 My mother didn't know. The only one that knew was the mother. She never told anybody. Did you, was she alive when you guys found out? She was alive. She was 97. And the granddaughter, who found out about it, confronted her.
Starting point is 00:37:01 And she said, died on the spot. Go ahead. Yeah, that's what killed her. She said, Grandma, whatever she called him. What do you know about Emmett Nealon? Did you, do you think you might have had, and she says, well, I was with him one night. Right.
Starting point is 00:37:19 I mean, it's a long story. No, no, no, no, go on. He was a good looking guy in the Bronx, and this family lived across the street from him growing up. a street from him growing up on old andville avenue and um the i don't know why people find this complicated when i tell them the woman's sister married my father's brother right okay so that's how my father kind of knew them i mean how they got closer like they'd have reunions and my father would go and my brother would show up and he would say this guy is cool i like this guy you know i like
Starting point is 00:37:50 hanging out with me he seems like a nice guy so he was around he never knew that was his father though He thought his... He thought it was, just, you know... But who did he think was his father? His, his, his, his, basically his uncle, he thought his uncle was his father. Yeah, yeah. And was it... No, no, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:38:08 He thought that my father, oh, he knew that my father was the brother of, uh, his uncle. Oh, okay, okay. See how complicated it seems to get, but it's not, it's not that complicated. It's still a little complicated. Yeah. And did they, so it wasn't chaos. It wasn't. a scandal. No, it wasn't. But there is something that came up recently that I thought, well,
Starting point is 00:38:31 maybe the father knew his, his, his, you know, his father that raised him because he was saying that whenever he went to a reunion or a gathering, his father Joe would always ask, is Emmett going to be there? Or maybe he didn't even ask, he just didn't show up. So, yeah, possibly, you know, I mean, I'm not sure who knew. Yeah. That's, That's like that time too. Oh, yeah. Like they just a lot of secrets and like, yeah, yeah. This would can't, I'd have to live it.
Starting point is 00:39:05 Go, go away. If a woman got pregnant, she'd have to go. Oh, yeah. They go to a nunnery, what do they call them, comment? Yep. And then. And then one thing leads another. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:17 So, okay. So, and what's the rap? Is it hard being you? Is it fun to be you? It's fun to be me. I get to do a lot of great things. Do you know what it's like? People love you when you go on the stage.
Starting point is 00:39:28 When I'm at home, I'm a goofball. Yeah. You know, I put the milk in the cupboard. You know, my son laughs at me because I don't remember the exact names of the actors or whatever. Yep. Or I don't know how to do the, you know, pay with my phone quick enough, you know, the technology.
Starting point is 00:39:43 Yeah. I don't tap it close enough. You didn't tap the parking meeting. Yeah. So. I tap, I had to tap the forum, guys. So when I go and like, when you go to a club. Dementia.
Starting point is 00:39:52 It's called dementia. Are you forgetting we're having a conversation? When you go to a club, how can you not like your life? I mean, people are applauding for you. They love you. At least in my case. I don't know what happened to you. I can only imagine.
Starting point is 00:40:05 Yeah. You have a great joke that I want to talk about, which is you openly said you didn't like Anthony Bourdain. Did that make it under the YouTube special? No. I stopped doing that because I started feeling guilty about it. Because a lot of people have, you know, no people that have committed suicide. But I did it.
Starting point is 00:40:25 And I knew he would like it because he was very self-effacing and deprecating. He even said that when he dies, he wants to be thrown into a wood chipper. Throw me into a wood chipper and spray me into Harrods, you know. Did they honor his wishes? I don't think they did. They did. Were you at the, was anybody at the restaurant that you know?
Starting point is 00:40:44 They did, but that was the last time they ever went. But Berdane is still there. Everywhere. He's a part, still a big part of the room. Yeah. Okay. And then in terms of... In fact, I remember you telling you,
Starting point is 00:40:55 Let me keep doing that joke because I think you knew that it was kind of a little bit. Yeah, people won't. Kevin Neal and would in public say I didn't like Anthony Bourdain. But they knew I was joking. Because I had. I did like him. I knew you liked him. I thought he was kind of cool.
Starting point is 00:41:11 Yeah. The way he'd come out of the kitchen and smoke a cigarette. You know what I? Here's my rap on Anthony Bordane. I would never say this on stage. I'll say it. There's actually a picture of him in the book. Is that true?
Starting point is 00:41:22 Yeah. We're going to get to that in a second. Okay. Kevin Neelanart.com. He developed a website. Is every episode of Anthony Bourdain's show that I saw, every country came to the same conclusion that the food was as hearty as the people. The way Sicilians shop reflects their outlook on life. Here's to the real Mexico.
Starting point is 00:41:48 Food made by hand. Cheap, local, a true reflection of a place. Literally every episode, it's like Vietnam, Germany, Thailand, Ghana. The food is as hearty as the people. Okay, man. And they'd let up a cigarette. Yep. And then he'd be on a Tuk-took or he'd be on a river boat.
Starting point is 00:42:08 Yeah, or a Cam or whatever. So that's why I didn't. Do you like the food shows? Oh, you didn't like him. No, I would never say that. I like somebody feed Phil. Phil's a friend of mine. And he's done the pot.
Starting point is 00:42:20 He does it right. Yeah, he's a good guy. I don't watch the food shows. network yeah because I have food at home I don't need to watch it on TV yeah I'm not gonna watch on TV go yeah I got that I got it's in the fridge okay so you have basketball at home I have like five basketballs would you watch basketball on television no I don't same reason same reason I also high school shorts in my closet gym we have we have basketball at home why we watch basketball yeah um okay that's
Starting point is 00:42:48 let me go into this book so so you don't have a lot of so psychological problems like Was no, you've never had, you don't, you don't, I used to, I used to have claustrophobia. Go on. What was that? When I was in SNL, I had to do, in a nutshell, when I was in SNL, I had to do a character of Jay Leno. So they need to build a prosthetic for my chin. Yes. Right?
Starting point is 00:43:10 And I've never had a life mask made, which they call it, they put plaster all over your face. Yep. They don't do it anymore. But, and the guy told me, goes, this is going to, you're going to mix it up and put on your face. We're going to cover everything except for your nostrils. I'm going to tell you what happens. it's going to heat up a little bit and then it's going to harden. And then we take it off.
Starting point is 00:43:26 The whole thing will take about 11 minutes. I said, no problem, no problem. So they throw plastic over me. I can't hear anything. I can't move on my mouth and just my nostrils. And then it started heating up and getting harder and I started panicking. It was such a surprise to me because I thought,
Starting point is 00:43:41 if they close my nostrils, then I'm, you know, I can't breathe, I'll suffocate. And it's plastered onto my face. So I passed out in the chair. Wow. Yeah. And the guy, I put it in cold water and showed it to me.
Starting point is 00:43:54 And it looked like this. Because we can't salvage this one. So I said, let's do it again. Because I thought that was a fluke. You know, I shouldn't be doing that. So we didn't even turn up the radio loud so I can hear that, I have some sensory. And I kept my hands out from under the plastic.
Starting point is 00:44:10 And you could breathe the whole time. Yeah, through my nose. But I'm on open mouth breather. Now you know. Now you tell me. I also have a CPAP machine. Is that true? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:21 But I don't use it for the breathing. just for kicking it jerk it's a jerking on joke I didn't I got I didn't you talking about that you know jerking off joke is that how you think you I use it to circulate air around the room okay and you're thinking that way I thought you were using so you have psychological problem like that as hey yes ding me anyway so I tried it again and I almost passed out again and I thought who got through that week later I'm so like elevated heart rate like yeah yeah everything like close It feels like the walls are closing in.
Starting point is 00:44:56 Yeah, so well, yeah, I mean, that eventually happened. I'm on the subway two weeks later or a week later, and I've stopped in between stations, and it's dark. And I started getting that same feeling. I could go back there right now and reliving it. I had a panic attack before I did special, and I had them, I had to start taking propanol. Yeah, because I never got them.
Starting point is 00:45:21 Profofanol. Profofo. And now I now I can you're once your body knows you can do it. It's like oh well no we do like you're allowed to have it now. Yeah like no no we're cleared let's have we should have one. Oh and it's that's what happened to you. Yeah but you still get them? Yeah if I don't take a propan.
Starting point is 00:45:39 Oh you gotta take that. Yeah. Profanol. And do you and did you get one again? Had you get? Oh yeah for like a couple years and it escalated. It got even more and more and I thought how am I going to work ever again? because I can't be out on stage, I'm gonna fly someplace.
Starting point is 00:45:54 Yeah. Even going on stage, I knew I had to be on there for 45 minutes. I couldn't leave, so I felt trapped. So I'd always tell the MC, I'd say, hey, standby, you know, because I might have to leave the stage, just stand by, because I'll get, like, and he, they'd always laugh like I was kidding.
Starting point is 00:46:07 Yep. If I had to do a scene on SNL and I had to wear layers of clothes, I would get clausophobic. Ooh. Because I was trapped in them. So. And that was the time when sketches would be like eight, nine minutes long, too.
Starting point is 00:46:20 Yeah, that's right. sketches for too long. Yeah. If anything over four and a half, five, you get a little itchy. Right. You got cut from a lot of sketches because they were like Kevin, this one. Casher bed time. He's in the bathroom, in the walls.
Starting point is 00:46:32 Yeah, so I thought, what am I going to do in airplanes? How am I going to do gigs? You know, I'm done. But I realized that if I'm sitting on the tarmac in an airplane, if I took out a sketchpad and started drawing, that would distract me. And the same with going through the tunnels to get out of New York. I would put a blanket over my head, put the walk man on and just turn it up blouse.
Starting point is 00:46:53 I wouldn't know I was in the tunnel or not. And so I finally went to a doctor. I started becoming agoraphobic. Because if I would see traffic backed up on a freeway, if I couldn't get home, I would start panicking. Bridges, you know, and when I was going through a tunnel, the Lincoln Tunnel, I'd always look and say, okay, we're halfway now. So if I have to get out, I'll run that way.
Starting point is 00:47:15 You know, more than halfway. They do that walkway, which I think is a decent. Yeah, yeah. I know that walkway. Elevated on the right. Well, if you're going into the city, it's on the right. Yeah. And you can actually squeeze through on the left.
Starting point is 00:47:26 If you have to. I know you, I believe you. I know you thought about it. So I finally ended up going to a doctor in the valley. And believe it or not, his name was doctor. The valley doesn't bother you? Like, I'm going to be stuck in the valley. Well, no, I had a blanket over my head.
Starting point is 00:47:44 Tons of car accidents. Yeah. You know, driving and driving, whatever. Luckily, I wasn't driving. But I go to this guy and he has a phobia workbook. But the biggest thing that helped me was whenever I started feeling it coming on, and if anybody's listening and they get panic attacks or anxiety, it's a brown paper lunch bag.
Starting point is 00:48:02 You scrunch the opening and you put it to your mouth and you breathe in like, you know, for four seconds and then breathe out for eight seconds. I'm not sure which, you know, if that's the right order or not. But that helped me. And it would give you, I don't know if it would give you, I forget what he said, more carbon. dioxide or something. Yeah. Or just watching the bag going up and down. It helped me a lot. Yeah, it's box breathing is one of the techniques. Oh, it is? It's in for five, hold for five,
Starting point is 00:48:30 exhale for five. Make sure you don't have like a tuna sandwich in the lunch bag because you'll be breathing that in. Yeah. And that'll, that can make things more. Yeah. And it, does it ever come up anymore? No. No, I go in and don't worry about anything. Although I did not. I did not. go to on this ride in Seattle it's kind of like the ride is similar to that ride they have at California land soaring where you get on like a chairlift kind of a thing and you go over the country it's really cool but I didn't go in because I wasn't with anybody and that was just a touch of it but now you just were like yeah I would have gone in but if there wasn't a wait but the show already started so it's like another half hour
Starting point is 00:49:18 But now that's all gone because I confronted it. I go in elevators now. I don't mind. And you just, cool, cool guy on an elevator. I'll go on that bath escape down to the Titanic. I don't care. You'll take the submersible? Simmercable, yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:34 Yeah. I was thinking about escaping from a bath because I got a panic attack once. Bathtub? Bath tub. Bath escape. Hey, do you have any questions? Let me ask you something.
Starting point is 00:49:44 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you hear that I have a documentary? No. We have a documentary. My wife and I are executive producers on it. We're a team of executive producers. It's produced by Tignitaro. Sure.
Starting point is 00:49:57 Steph Willan. Is it go to where the good light is? Come see me in the good light. Come see me in the good light. Come see me in the good light. Yeah. And we're really excited because it was nominated for an Oscar. I'm going to the Oscar for the first time, Oscars. And it's a great, great documentary.
Starting point is 00:50:11 It's a story about these two women who live in Colorado. They're poets. Andrew Gibson is a poet laureate. Their wife is Megan Folly. She's a poet as well. And it's really a love story and it's joyful. It's surprisingly funny. And it's about Andrew Gibson being diagnosed with an inoperable cancer and how she faces that.
Starting point is 00:50:39 And with the joy that comes from that, it's kind of like a radical joy throughout the whole thing. And it really is life affirming. And I guarantee if you go to see it, you will really appreciate life much more. I got it, here's a question for you. What do you make of death in general? Guys, you know, I've been, I'm interested in what my body's doing. A lot of the stuff I talk about on here is body-based. I've done all sorts of stuff.
Starting point is 00:51:05 There's also, I've gotten tested for every food allergy. I've just gotten, I love a test. I love a, I love a plan. I love an app. I can look stuff on, a website I can look on. I like, we live in the age of too much information. and and it, but it's good or I'm not going to say too much information. More information than ever is at our fingertip.
Starting point is 00:51:25 Anyway, superpower. Here's what they're doing. They come to the house. You go to the lab. They do a draw, right? You give them a sample. And then they send it off and they check you for a hundred different biomarkers, which is way more than you normally get.
Starting point is 00:51:41 Unlocks real understanding of your body as you head into this glorious year 2026. The Air App and. It includes detailed information on your heart, liver, thyroid, hormones, metabolism, vitamin, and mineral levels, and even environmental toxins. So from disease prevention and treating that annoying brain fog or simply optimizing your gym game, superpower is the most comprehensive and advanced system out there. All right, here's what it is. There's a thing for rich people called concierge service where they do this.
Starting point is 00:52:10 You go to a lab. It's way more expensive than this. I'll tell you the price in a second. It's you get the same information. It's the same system. it's just better. It's just better. The price is fair.
Starting point is 00:52:22 They give you your results. Then they suggest if you want to do supplements. They can do prescription suggestions. You don't have to go anywhere else. I'm nothing if not lazy. One-stop shop. They'll give you nutritional guidance, lifestyle and behavioral adjustment.
Starting point is 00:52:37 You'll even get your true biological aids that you can track over time. Guys, here's the price. You used to be $4.99. Right now, $1.99 for the full experience. That's more affordable than anything else out there. Other testing charge $500,000. Some is more.
Starting point is 00:52:52 It's crazy. It's good. I'm telling you. This is a good system. I've been doing like the rich one and I'm doing, I've done this twice now. It's better. Make this year the year you stop guessing about your health with superpower. Not only did Superpower reduce their price to just $1.99,
Starting point is 00:53:08 but for a limited time, our listeners get an additional $20 off with code N-EAL. Head to superpower.com to get your membership. $20 off with. Code Neal at checkout, $20 off your membership. After you sign up, they'll ask you how you heard about them. Make sure you say Neal. They should get the idea from the code, but they want double verification. This is all my idea.
Starting point is 00:53:30 Superpower.com. Code Neal. Thanks. Guys, this podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Okay, Squarespace. Another one been using it. It's the all-in-one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online, whether you're starting out or scaling your.
Starting point is 00:53:47 your business. Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand and get paid all in one place. All right. So I'm pretty old, right? Uh, you wouldn't know by how limber I am in the lives, but I'm bringing it up there. Old credits, we'll say that. So I've been deal a build website, hire I got to build it, do it is. I got to do it. I got to get text. They got whatever. Here's what I realized. There used to be like four different websites you had to go to. And I think Squarespace has figured it out, like, oh, we should just sell domain names, have a B2B thing, have a video hosting, sell merch hosting. Just, it used to be like separate and you had to, it was a paint, right? And then
Starting point is 00:54:36 you have to do a plug in it. Now, they've got it all now. I've actually been working on my website. It's not perfect, guys. I go look. We're building. But if we're doing it with Squarespace, putting them loading photos in, moving, choosing fonts, choosing layouts, it's getting there. It's cute. When I put shows on sale, it's going to get a little, it'll get a little more serious. But for the time being, I stand by what we're doing over there. Squarespace is great. I suggest going on there, buy a domain, build your site, whatever you want to do.
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Starting point is 00:57:53 For full safety information, go to row.com slash safety info. It's good, dude. I'm telling you. I didn't, I wouldn't, I wouldn't lie. Our penises are too important. I would never lie. I got to, here's a question for you. What do you make of death?
Starting point is 00:58:10 in general having it happens right okay but are you does it scare you are you are you you know your parents died your yeah your Jan Hooks died a lot of your friends passed like what do you what do you make of it well as I grow older I grow more wiser and are you are you supposed to say that yeah okay why not I don't know it seems arrogant well it's true how could something be arrogant if it's a It's like gossip. Well, you know, if you're good looking, you don't go, I'm good looking.
Starting point is 00:58:46 By the way, I chat GBTed. Actually, my son chat GBTed to see if I was handsome. And they said, not in a Hollywood way, not in a Hollywood movie kind of way, but he's warm, and, you know, some people find that attractive. Now I want to do it. Talk to me about death. You'll die eventually. Okay. You won't know it.
Starting point is 00:59:06 Okay. It'll be like sopranos. Yeah. Don't stop. believe and will come on. Yeah, it's just empty. That's what it is. I was friends with Norman Lear. Yep. He lived to be 100 of 1. He did. I said, Norman, do you worry about death, about dying and leaving? He said, it's not the going. It's the leaving. Because he's leaving this beautiful planet with all these people he loves and these experiences. And he's moving on to whatever he believes. But that's the way I feel. It's really what's happening right now. And I do believe when you die, it's nothingness.
Starting point is 00:59:46 You don't even know anything. It's just you don't exist. What do you make of the animation of life? If life is, we exist, and then if you don't exist, I'm having more trouble following you right now. This is your father's brother was there. Yeah. If there is there, shouldn't, are you opening the idea that maybe there's more
Starting point is 01:00:10 or no oh yeah yeah yeah anything maybe that's called agnostic yeah i don't i'll believe it when i see it but i've been kind of seeing a lot of atheists on instagram giving their views and a lot of them i agree with yeah i think you know yeah there's even ricky jervais has a good outlook he goes there's you know 200 and there's 300 000 religions in the planet and yours just happens to be the right one oh yeah i don't i don't i don't buy any like the and then this has happened but it I do buy the or I I think I hope or feel like maybe there's something I do too but here's my thought as I grow wiser and older and not conventionally get looking isn't it kind of isn't it kind of not arrogant but to think that you know how we all got here
Starting point is 01:01:05 I don't think we're capable of understanding the immensity completely agree what is going on So we create this. Well, no, that's why people who say it wear a robe and a crazy hat. Because it's so impossible that they would know. And they'd be like, well, would someone with this robe on not know? You know what I mean? Yeah. What gets me is when people look up in the sky when they're talking about heaven.
Starting point is 01:01:31 Yeah, it's up there. The hell is downstairs. What's straight in front of you? Life, my friend. Enjoy it. And behind me is the past. All right, we're going to go. I'm going to flash people and you tell me your favorite anecdote about these people.
Starting point is 01:01:49 Okay. We're going to start with Robin Williams. I used to, you know, I knew Robin Williams. When I first came out here, I worked at the improv as a bartender for a couple of years. And I would hang out there just to do open mic night. And I was there almost every night. When someone would come into town, they say, Hey, what can you show them around here?
Starting point is 01:02:10 I can show you the improv. Yeah. And back then, a lot of people were coming in. Comics that I adored, you know, Robin Williams, Andy Kaufman, Steve Martin came in. Would Andy Kaufman do well? Yes. He would. Oh, my God, the place was packed.
Starting point is 01:02:26 No, no, no. Not crowded. Would it was that would people laugh and have fun? Yes, they would. I mean, to a certain point, he would read. At one point, he read the Great Gratsby. Yep. And people thought I'd just read.
Starting point is 01:02:38 like, you know, a paragraph or two, but he kept reading it. Yeah. I kept reading it. And people would leave. Yep. And they hear laughter. They come back inside.
Starting point is 01:02:47 Yep. And I really admired him because it was, who really explored the psychology of comedy and what makes people laugh. And I try to do that. He was one of the people that influenced me, him and Albert Brooks and Steve Martin. Yep.
Starting point is 01:03:01 And to this day, when I'm on stage, I listen to the laughter. I think what a great ability. to bring this emotion out of people. Yeah. Where they will audibly emit these noises. It's a definitely a weird thing. If an alien came down and walked into the showroom
Starting point is 01:03:21 at the Improved Comedy Star and they saw people doing that, they would look at it. They would look at it. What the hell's going on here? Yeah. And you wouldn't really be able to tell him. All right. And Robin, so you worked at the bar.
Starting point is 01:03:31 Yeah, so Robin would come in. He come back from, he was doing a show at the time called Mark and Mindy. And he come in because he would always do these shows right after he got out of, doing taping, whatever it was. And he showed up with his suspenders on, with all the pins on there and his pants.
Starting point is 01:03:44 And he went on and he would kill. He would crush. When I first moved out here, I saw David Letterman and Jay Leno, I thought, oh my God, I can't get any better than that. And then I go to a place in Newport at the time was called The Laft Stop. And this guy gets up and he walks to the crowd. He's taking women's purses and he's going through them,
Starting point is 01:04:01 pulling stuff out. And he's doing Shakespeare. I thought, oh my God, why am I even doing comedy? Yeah. You know, why would I even buy it? don't even bother. But then I realized he can't be everywhere at once, almost. So you're like Robin William's understudy? Like Robin Williams can't make it tonight. Yeah, yeah. I had to follow him once at the Improbin, New York. Horrible. People were looking at. I actually saw him at the Improv in New York
Starting point is 01:04:24 when I was in high school and he, like, he didn't kill. No. He didn't, him and Rick Overton did improv and it was coming. It just wasn't great. You tell him that? No, I never caught. I didn't catch up I did see him in a club. I never really knew the real Robin Williams offstage. I would talk to him somebody. It was always like, Oh, how are you doing boss? Hey, boss, how's it going to boss?
Starting point is 01:04:48 Called everybody boss. Because you didn't remember the name, I'm sure. So we were at Cobbs Comedy Club. And this is like in the 80s, early 80s. And it was a club called Cobbs and was in the marina at the time. And he had done a set. And then he left.
Starting point is 01:05:05 And then he came back to the club and he was pissed. I go, what's going on? He goes, oh, I can't stop my car. He was really angry. And it was weird to see him angry. Yeah. And maybe he realized he's a regular person, you know? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:17 He's doing an act. So I said, well, maybe I got help you out. And so we go back, he's got a range rover. It's an old one. I know nothing about cars. I know nothing how to fix a car. So we open up the hood and he's leaning in there and he's swearing and stuff.
Starting point is 01:05:33 I said, let me have a look at it. Knowing nothing. Nothing. You just wanted to help Rob Williams. I just wanted to make them think I was helping him. So I said, I, you know what? I don't know. It looks like maybe you might have to get some professional help here.
Starting point is 01:05:49 If I have my tools with me, sure. But I can't help you around me. Can I give you ride home? Did you? No. And what happened in the car? Do we know? It's still there.
Starting point is 01:06:00 Correct. It's still there. Johnny Carson. We already kind of. Yeah, I got so many. Stories about that. I do know when I did that show the first time, I've never been more terrified.
Starting point is 01:06:11 And I had to do it. I had to do it. Because if I missed that opportunity, and I'm behind the curtain, getting ready to go out, and my mouth is so dry. Yeah. It's so dry. I'm trying to go over my act.
Starting point is 01:06:22 And the curtain opens up, and I walk out to my tea all the way out to that little mark on the... Kevin Neelan. Thanks a lot. Thank you very much. That shiny black floor, I forgot my act. I could not remember it.
Starting point is 01:06:44 And the audience is applauding. And I'm thinking, oh, boy. And the last clap ended, I remembered it. And it was the best set I've ever had. I mean, you know, applause breaks. I went over my time because of the applause breaks. So they had to bump the last act. And he brought me over.
Starting point is 01:07:03 I did panel. And I couldn't have been happier. I was on Cloud 9. And I ended up dating the action. that we bumped for like six months. Wow. Who was the actor? Every way.
Starting point is 01:07:13 Rosalind Chow. She was on a show called Aftermash. Nice girl. Great. Anyway, I've never had such a natural high than that, doing that show. I was just, I was, and everybody at the improv back then, they would watch it on TV at the time. And I knew they're all there, and I went to my friend's house and just watched it with a pillow in front of my eyes. Like, occasion I'd peer over.
Starting point is 01:07:38 Because it's so complicated. You don't know what to wear. I saw Ted Danzin on there. I thought, that's a nice outfit. Maybe I'll wear that. It was khakis with a maroon jacket. Uh-huh. That's high.
Starting point is 01:07:48 And I'm watching me afterwards and I'm going, I look like an usher. I look like a page over there. Yeah, like when you were just describing that outfit, I'm like, what? I know it. And my mouth was so dry. Well, you know, Ellen Sinbad got her outfit. Literally Sinbad helped her get her first outfit. And it's a Sinbad outfit.
Starting point is 01:08:05 It's unbelievable. Yeah. It's giant pants and giant pants. Yes. Anyway, my mouth was so dry when I would smile, the fake smile, like I just heard that joke first time. My lip, my top lip would stick to my gum. And I didn't want to lick it because I knew people
Starting point is 01:08:21 always nervous. Yeah. So I tried to adjust my lower lip up a little bit. But that was one of those things where I didn't want to do it, but I knew I had to, otherwise I regret it for the rest of my life. So I did it, Johnny Carson. And did it change your life? I've been dating Rosal and Chow for six months?
Starting point is 01:08:40 Well, you know, everything changes you. Talk about asserting dominance early in a relationship. You bumper and then you start dating? I mean, what do you want? Oh, man. Oh, man, Roslyn Chow. All right, Dave Letterman, first guest of the pod. How many, you've done his show a bunch, I assume?
Starting point is 01:08:55 I don't remember how many times, but I used to come down when I was on SNL. He was in the studio below us. And whenever a guest didn't show up, they would ask me to come down and kind of do a bit from the doorway or, you know, get on there. And I got to a point where I just, I wasn't only killing, you know, just coming down.
Starting point is 01:09:10 And so I said, I can't do these anymore. And, you know, it's just killing me. So that's funny. I've never heard someone like breaking up with a talk show. Like, look, it's not. I don't think this is worth it. We got back to him together again after a while. But there was some rules, you know.
Starting point is 01:09:28 You got to start a boundary. We had some boundaries we had established. But yeah, I would do his show quite a bit. And I remember during the commercial break, He would always turn to me, goes, this audience sucks, man. I said, oh, I thought I did good. This audience sucks. I remember one time I was breaking up with a girl,
Starting point is 01:09:46 and Paul Sheaf would always ask, what song do you want us to play you out on? And I remember thinking, this will show her. What a fool believes by the Doobie Brothers. Message sent. I don't even think she watched it. Of course. She probably didn't even know what's on it,
Starting point is 01:10:01 but it made me feel good. Yeah, she'll, if she, if she, you know, that they're on YouTube. By the way, I didn't know how David Letterman felt about me. Yeah. Because he doesn't really communicate with people on the show. He doesn't talk to you during the commercial or beforehand. And I ran to him in the Caribbean about a year ago.
Starting point is 01:10:20 And I saw him in the restaurant and whatever said, hi to him. He could not be more gracious. Yeah. And complimentary to me, citing jokes that I've done, talking about how well I did at the Kennedy Awards for Lauren Michaels. If it weren't for you letting me go on SNL, I never would have gotten that lucrative blood thinner commercial. And my little hiking show, he watches.
Starting point is 01:10:45 Good morning. Welcome to my little hike. And he tells me this joke. Like you, you did that Lincoln joke. I said, really, what joke? He goes, you know, the Lincoln joke? I'm like, I'm not really sure I know that one. He goes, oh, I tell everybody that joke. I give you credit.
Starting point is 01:11:01 I said, well, maybe let me hear it. She goes, okay, well, you know, when Abraham Lincoln I was a kid, he used to walk through the snow to school every day. But what they don't tell you is that he was always late. So I thought, it doesn't sound familiar, but maybe I did do it. And then I'm thinking, I've got to put that on my act now and see, and now I can expand it. There reminds me of a joke that I know you did because I wasn't a comedian and I thought of the joke and then I saw you do it. Not again, that sounds like an answer.
Starting point is 01:11:33 I know. I know. That happens to me a lot. But it was live, you like to live. Every day, every day, your life. Yeah. In bed, surrounded by your friends. Family, make funeral arrangements.
Starting point is 01:11:44 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You say goodbye to everybody. Yeah, yeah. And it's funny how comics remember, like, early jokes you did. Yeah. Like David Spade, he says, he wouldn't even say it was a joke. He goes, yeah, I got one of those nice cameras.
Starting point is 01:11:57 It's one of those black ones. Yeah. But yeah, it's funny what people remember. But yeah, so Lutterman could not have been nicer to me. Letterman loves showbiz. By the way, I did that joke in my set. I tried it, nothing, crickets. Last day, oh, the Lincoln one?
Starting point is 01:12:13 The Lincoln joke I used to do. It sounds like a Norm joke, doesn't it? It does actually. Like, yeah, he's late. And he's late. Yeah, yeah, this fella. Good Lord. Good.
Starting point is 01:12:28 I love, you know, I'm discovering Norm more now than when he was around. I mean, watching those clips on Instagram, He's so funny, man. He's just got such an attitude. I worked with him before where he would walk the room. Yeah. Because he was just didn't care.
Starting point is 01:12:43 And I don't know if he was a medication at the time in hindsight for his cancer. But late in life, he would walk the room? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, because he was dealing with cancer. And he was taking medicine. No, no, yeah. But I thought you meant like in 1982 or something.
Starting point is 01:12:58 He would walk the room. You're talking about like 2000. Well, I didn't work with him too much in 82. But, you know, near the end. You like to wait till the end. with people. I wait until they have a limited amount of time left. Till and they can really show you the respect and appreciation you deserve. Yeah, but also to decide what they cherish it. What jokes I want to take from them
Starting point is 01:13:16 after they're gone. It's like an audition. What else? It's a showcase. It's like a jewelry in a case. Jim Carrey. Yeah, Jim Carrey. Yeah, Jim Carrey's hilarious, funny guy, rubber face. Rubber face and would do impressions. I remember. I remember. I remember, I remember being at a party with him not too long ago. And he likes to paint as well when I paint. So we had a lot in common. We talked about that. We used to text back and forth for a while, but then it was radio silence, you know,
Starting point is 01:13:48 which I think that happens with a lot of famous big people. You know, they have a lot to deal with. But you know what? My feelings were not hurt because I have thick skin. I get it. I get it. I did that with you. Then I cut you off?
Starting point is 01:14:02 Oh, you're the most. You're the very famous one? this yes I didn't I mean you are more famous to me no one's gonna argue with that um buzz Aldrin same thing he goes to do well I was supposed to be on the good this is a good drawing I was supposed to be the second man on the moon and and obviously buzz became a second man but I did run into him in Port de Voyarta once on the beach he was with his wife at the different wife you liked a vacation just to meet up with celebrities go ahead well I we had the same travel agent so I always checked to see where they're going
Starting point is 01:14:35 Surprise me. Anyway, her wife was always calling him and going, Buzzy, Buzzy. Oh, that's funny. Yeah. But these are, I have anecdotes on each page opposite of the book. I know, but I can't read them. It wouldn't be very good use of time.
Starting point is 01:14:52 But if you're going to get the book, and you should get it, if you're not, don't want it yourself, it makes a great gift. It's easy to wrap. I would suggest you get it at a mom and pop store. And if they don't have it, Amazon it overnight. Great. I had a joke about mom and pop store. which, you know, people say, what do Amazon and big box stores have that mom and pop stores don't.
Starting point is 01:15:13 And that is inventory. Oh. They have inventory and things that you want to buy in stock. Do you know what I noticed? Dana Carvey, this looks like a female Mike Berbiglia in this photo. Do you know what I notice before we go on with these pictures? It's going to take a long time to go through every picture. We're almost halfway down.
Starting point is 01:15:37 I'll show you Norm in there. Norm's in there. In the back. I've noticed that I'm getting a little bit of a chin here where it comes right from the thing down to my chest. So what I do now in interview shows? Is that when you say, when you say I have thick skin, that's right.
Starting point is 01:15:51 That's where it's all gone. That's what I thought you met. Yeah. So when I do interview shows now, I face forward, I just kind of look like this. I know it looks weird. Yeah, but just no, no, it's for a good. Because, you know, it gets to a point where you just got to wear scarves.
Starting point is 01:16:10 Turtle legs are good. I'm scarf, like I'm scarf years old. Lauren's not going to love this photo. Well, that's not the finish one. Okay. You thinned them. Talk about. No, you got to get to the next page.
Starting point is 01:16:21 You boxed them. One of these, you put a box around it. I don't I'm sure. That's the process right there. That's the, what I'm seeing right there is the process. Then, then Steve jowly. Character. But you're, but him.
Starting point is 01:16:35 Character. character. I exaggerate. Yeah. And now I knew, I see what you mean. Steve Martin, you, buddy years? Yeah. What's he like? It's like 6-1 maybe. It's great. I love them. I just, I just moderated a thing that Martin Short and Steve Martin did in Ohio. I would come out and do 10 minutes and then I would bring them out and we sit and like you're doing with me right now, moderate. And that was amazing because I grew up a Steve Martin fan. Yeah. I couldn't believe I'm traveling with him and he's got his banjo and Martin Short's there. But the problem was, you're really not showing Martin Short the respect he deserves twice. You were like, I grew up a
Starting point is 01:17:19 Steve Martin fan. Dead silence were and a Martin short fan. That's exactly how the interview went. I would introduce them. I'd say, Steve Martin, this is amazing banjo player, comedian. I was, you know, I grew up watching him. I loved, he influenced me. So we got Steve Martin, so Steve Martin and Marty Short. Steve Martin is incredibly funny, but he's not so funny that I have to pretend to like the banjo.
Starting point is 01:17:51 I played the five-stream banjo. I've been playing since I've been 18. Yeah, 18. And I started playing it only because of the movie Deliverance. That song got me so riled up. The banjo and the guitar. Riled up. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:03 Is that the word? Yeah. Riled up. Yeah. Like, you get, like, control myself. You, you'd have to, you'd have to, I haven't used the word riled in a long time. I know. Well, Riled.
Starting point is 01:18:16 I know. If it gets you riled up. Well, no, that's the beginning. Do I want to know what follows it? Do I want to know? After what, riled? Yeah. God, I have to have a fesaurus right now.
Starting point is 01:18:28 After you're riled. What do you, what do you do when you hear that? song well I started clogging and what would anybody else I don't we're leaping is what I'm leaping all of this because I'm we're monetized it just moved me and I went out and I bought a banjo and I would practice I've had had in the van and whenever I was like on my break from work I would go out to the van and just practice and one day it was like the jerk the movie jerk when he could start dancing you know he realized it and his feet were moving fast
Starting point is 01:18:56 the same way I all of a sudden I was I picked up the speed and I started playing really fast but I never learned that that song. After all that. I lost my raleity. You're riled. You lost your rile. Yeah. You're Riley. Farley. Farley was amazing. Farley. I was always looking for the laughs, of course. And they always trying to get sailing and those guys to laugh. They shared it off his space. Yeah, 17th floor of 30 Rock. And it was him and David Spade and Tim Meadows and Farley. And Farley was always, you know, wanted to be accepted. And he would do these crazy things. One day he came in and Jay Moore tells this story better because I think he was there when it happened. But, and I'm paraphrasing it.
Starting point is 01:19:45 But Farley comes in and he goes, hey, you want me to drop, I want to drop my pants and stick my butt out the window and take a big poop down to, you know, 49th Street. And they're like, do it, do it, do it, do it. So sure not, he dropped his pants and he stuck his butt out the window, took this big, steamy dump. But it wasn't out far enough, so it landed on the window, And it's still there to this day.
Starting point is 01:20:06 Jesus. I was going to say, how do you know it was steaming? Oh, no. It's documented. It's documented. It's like Jane Moore. The paint is feeling on the ceiling above. Notarized.
Starting point is 01:20:16 It's notarized. Chris Rock. This is a sketch from the special tambourine, which I think I exec produced with Chris. Did you really? I guess I think I did. You would remember. I think I got an exact producer credit.
Starting point is 01:20:31 And what about Chappelle's special? Do you do? I know you co-partnered with him. Just the just the TV show. So I just you you you have a good synergy with black comics. I do. Which is great man. That means you're hip.
Starting point is 01:20:46 It's I'm a pretty. Why am I so nervous about even saying that? I know. I mean, because you're not in line there. You're not hip. Because it's not hip because it's not. No, I'm just fearful.
Starting point is 01:20:56 It's because it's slavery. Basically if you want to know why it's because of slavery. Are you, can you dance? I can dance better than you'd think Really? Yeah Where does that come from? My affiliation
Starting point is 01:21:10 I can dance better than you'd think Can you do the jig? I don't like that one for this I don't like that in this area I can I can dance pretty good Oh you James Taylor
Starting point is 01:21:27 I was wondering is this is this James Hetfield based on this is Hesher James had James Taylor back when he did you know him back then you were friends with him right I didn't know him back then but I was a huge fan but I know him now yeah I've known him for you brought him to heal from you like all right relax we're friends yeah yeah yeah Chris walking he hosted that's a good Chris walking sketch he does not like it I bet he doesn't he doesn't he doesn't not like it I was trying to get approval just you know it's courtesy when I was doing a little book tour to promote
Starting point is 01:21:58 you actually sounded a little bit like him courtesy courtesy And Jim Carrey was fine with it, Steve Martin, but I sent it to him and he did not like it. He hated it. He goes, under no circumstances, can you do this on the show? That's very funny. You have, I stole from Hans and Franz without realizing it in my last special.
Starting point is 01:22:22 You did? Yeah. Did you realize? I didn't know that. I did a thing where I was talking about influencers. I did see you a special. Yeah, you text me, thank you. Influencers do this. What's up, guys? I call them all the clappers because they start all their posts like this.
Starting point is 01:22:36 What's up, guys? I'm Hans. A dime, France. And we want to pop you up. And I realized it's Hans and Park. No one else has ever clapped before. No, I know. But I was like after when I did Carvey's and Spades podcast.
Starting point is 01:22:54 Hey, you know what you were talking before about doing somebody else's material and not knowing it. when I was about to shoot my special, loose in the crotch, streaming now, I'm going to 800-pound gorilla platform. I was looking at some other people's specials just to see what they were doing for a backdrop. Yes. Because I didn't know, you know, I was thinking,
Starting point is 01:23:13 you know, what do I want to use? And I'm flipping through and I get the spade and he's doing my opening joke that I wanted to do, which is strong, you know? It was like gonna get me through. And I just said, well, I gotta cut that because it's too similar. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:27 And I regret it to this day. I should have left it. in there. I remember, too, I had a joke once, and Stephen Wright came up with the same joke. It was, you know, one day I got home and they accidentally tried to open up my house door with the car key, and the house started up. That was, you did have that joke? Yeah. It's a fucking great job. We both had that same, you know, he obviously did not take it from me, and I didn't take it from him, but, you know, New England, East Coast. What are you going to do? Like mine's. parallel uh gary shanling is in here you in judd's documentary um about gary yeah it's a lot of your eulogy
Starting point is 01:24:04 which uh i was very moved by and it was fucking hilarious oh you were there no i just watching it in judd's thing oh it was just a clip of it yeah i can only imagine what it was like the full thing let's take a look i loved our conversations on the phone i'm going to miss those late into the night talking about comedy and joke structure. It was just him and me. And on occasion, Anthony Pelicano. Okay. Put it in there.
Starting point is 01:24:37 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I've done, I've worked in black television before, but I'll see if I can figure out how to put a white clip in. No, Neil, it was an incredible surreal evening, everybody getting up and talking about him. And I, that happened a month after he passed away, so I had a lot of time to think about it. So I would be flying to do gay.
Starting point is 01:24:56 to do gigs and I put on a headphone and listen to music that kind of moved me and I was just reminiscing about everything we did together. And it's hard for me to be serious for too long. I need to throw a laugh in there just to kind of diffuse it. And so I would talk about him and be very moving, but then before I lost it, I would put a joke in there. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:25:23 And that would save everybody. Yeah. I realize that that is really the best platform for comedy is to have a eulogy you're you're you're absolutely right i totally agree it is because it's so sad and you need people are so like prone and they're like it's such a relief when you can be funny yeah probably the best set i ever had in my life it looks like it yeah i mean to this day people say hey would you do my eulogy would you do my eulogy yeah like it it truly looks like it and uh i was i always tell people the story
Starting point is 01:25:59 about like showbiz because it's it is so Brad I'm sorry Gary sues Brad Gray right Brad's like stealing his clients whatever yeah and then
Starting point is 01:26:14 he hires Brad hires Anthony Policano he's tapping your phone Gary he's tapping Gary's phone illegal he goes to jail yeah Gary dies Brad dies I'm alive.
Starting point is 01:26:28 You're still here. Why? No, no, but my question is like, what happened? Like, do you, if you're them, do you go, boy, that was a waste of time. Like, if you're Gary, do you go, I wish I hadn't spent an minute on that if I knew I was going to die? I mean, I guess there's nothing you can do, but no. I mean, you live in the present. Right.
Starting point is 01:26:48 You don't know what's going to happen. But sure. I mean, I would be on the phone with Gary for hours, and he'd be talking about his, you know, complications with Brad Gray. And I was at Brillstein, too, Brillstein Gray Enterprise. And I wouldn't really say that much to him about it
Starting point is 01:27:07 because I was his friend, but I didn't really know what happened. But I was siding with him because he's my friend. And I would hear the same. It would be repeated over and over what I've heard before. And he's just him venting.
Starting point is 01:27:21 And I was there to listen. But I would occasionally hear tap tap on the phone. And kiddingly, I say, Yeah, it sounds like my phone's tapped. And that was when you had landlines. Yeah. And we both kind of laugh about it.
Starting point is 01:27:33 And then I'm opening up the New York Times one morning and it's sliced alone or I can't remember who it was. Somebody else and then me. We had our phones tapped. I go, what? Yeah. Yeah. So I don't know if it got back to Brad Gray about anything I said on the phone.
Starting point is 01:27:52 Yeah. But, you know, you know, Yeah, that's what happened. Yeah, so it's just such like, ugh. Like the fact that Gary died is like, but, and then just had spent so much time on that, like it seemed like it completely preoccupied him for almost a decade, right?
Starting point is 01:28:12 Well, Gary was like that. He would get preoccupied with a lot of things. Yeah. Obsessed. Yeah. With it. And that's kind of what made him so special. He would, I remember we used to write on the phone. I was doing a corporate gig somewhere.
Starting point is 01:28:26 and I would call him and we talk on the phone forever about, you know, this corporation, whatever it was. And I would say a joke or he would say a joke, and I go, okay, great. And then they also do this. They have this thing, he goes, no, no, no, no, let's stay with this for a while. And I go, okay, you know, I'm more of a hit and run guy.
Starting point is 01:28:46 Right. And he goes, you got so much more you can milk out of your bits, you know, you just kind of, you gotta stay with it. Did it help? Yeah, it did. Yeah. And also he kind of stressed being in the bits. in the moment on stage.
Starting point is 01:28:58 Well, that, present. Yeah, when you, he was so in the moment sometimes. It was like crazy how in the moment he was. So he would, he did a Bill Marsha one time and it was like, it was like watching a seance or something. He was so, it was so crazy. And I talked to him about it was like, what happened? And he was like, I just meditated.
Starting point is 01:29:19 He knew, he was aware of it, like how funny he was. Yeah, on that. And you, and he was a good friend. Yeah, he was a good friend. And we would get on stage together often because we had this kind of chemistry that was, he was the loose cannon and I'm trying to keep him on track.
Starting point is 01:29:37 You know, he starts swearing and stuff. He's like, you're with the potty mouth. You know, you don't need to putty mouth. Why are you doing? Yeah, and he'd have all those notes on there, you know, the legal pad. Yeah. All crumpled papers.
Starting point is 01:29:49 But, yeah, we had a lot of good times together. And sometimes, you know, he would go off to Hawaii and I wouldn't even hear from him for three months. He was famous. That was just his. It's like with you and me. Yeah. Years.
Starting point is 01:30:01 Do you think we could be friends? I've always thought we could be friends. I think you didn't believe in it. I've had some people that said that like Bill Maher, after I did a show, he goes, why aren't we friends? Yes, it will. Take a look at the mirror.
Starting point is 01:30:16 I'm kidding. But, you know, you just don't have time to be friends with everybody. Because then you don't have the quality friendship. That's what you're about quality. Speaking of we don't have time. I have two friends. You know what a boom. You really
Starting point is 01:30:30 fucking set me up for that. Hey listen, I got to go. You got to go. We covered it all, right? We got the special out. Loose in the crotch and you too. We got the crotch. We got the documentary.
Starting point is 01:30:40 We got the book. The book? We got the rehydrator. But we got the dehydrator. We got the slap chop. We got the riled. We got wild. We got he, this guy gets riled by bernaner,
Starting point is 01:30:52 naar, naer, naar, naeer, near, you want to purchase one of my paintings. or portion Kevin NealonRef.com. Devenilean. Dementia awareness. Come see me in the good light. Come see me in the good light's the name of the documentary. Hiking with Kevin on you.
Starting point is 01:31:06 Hiking with Kevin on you. We didn't talk about it. You have to do. I would love to. Take your time. Guys. Did you just say? Take your time with the invite.
Starting point is 01:31:17 I don't do them that much anymore. No, I know. I haven't done one. I can only a year. Yeah, no, I'm sure. It's a scheduling company. Kevin Nealin was here and he was. It was great. It was great.
Starting point is 01:31:28 It was great, man. This was fun. A lot of times, like, an hour in, I think I'm ready to go. This one time, it took an hour and 20. One time you did my, and then I'm going to let you go. One time you did my new material night, and we were just talking. I used to laugh about this still. We were talking, and you were ready to go. I just kept asking you stuff. And then you got to laugh, and then you just got up and left. Yeah, I just dropped the mic and walked. It was great. It was over. I used to get mad because you wouldn't give people good interest. Kevin Nealon, ladies
Starting point is 01:31:57 gentlemen. I'm the worst emcee by the way. Great, you should do it more. I can't keep saying it. The podcast is over. I can't keep, I can't. That's how you end? Actually, keeping that.
Starting point is 01:32:09 That's how you end the podcast? Yeah, the podcast. Jesus Christ.

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