Bonanas for Bonanza - The Andy Daly Podcast Project Presents Extravaganza Octopod 1, Episode 4: Extravaganza: “Don and Mal Handle The Scandals Episode #69: Monkey Business”

Episode Date: January 24, 2026

Don and Mal take a deep dive into the waters of Biscayne Bay with Gary Hart, Donna Rice and plenty of Monkey Business! Featuring Matt GourleySubscribe to The Andy Daly Podcast Project at Patreon.com/AndyDalyA tip of the hat to Matt Bai's book "The Front Runner", which was Mr. DiMello's primary source. It has also been made into a fine motion picture by the same name.Merch: redbubble.com/people/ADPodProject/shopMail: PO Box 9407 Glendale, CA 91226Email: [e-mail]’s website: andydaly.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, Andy Daley here with another episode of bonus nanza extravaganza, the comedy podcast grabbag series that Matt Gourley and I have been doing exclusively on my Patreon for the past few years. Now I'm releasing a season, or Octopod, as I'm calling it, of eight extravaganzas right here every Saturday. These episodes were lovingly hand-selected by the Patreon subscribers for your enjoyment, and if you do find yourself enjoying them, we certainly hope that you'll consider subscribing at patreon. com slash Andy Daily. With that, I give you the Andy Daily podcast project presents extravaganza Octopod 1, episode 4. Extravaganza, Don and Mal Handle the Scandals, Episode number 69, Monkey Business. Enjoy.

To gentlemen and welcome to Don and Mal handle the scandals. As always, this is episode. Episode 69. Monkey business is the name of today's episode. I'm John Demello, Theatrical Director. I'm now Backman, currently holding office hours at the Pasadenaeusanoia Beef Bowl. Look for me in the left rear corner table. Whenever Delilah's not taking it, there's been a bit of a war of geographical seating locations,

but I rise above it. She's an asshole. What hours are you there? What hours are you? trying to be there. One to three, Monday, Tuesday, and Friday. Okay, you don't do Thursday. No. What are you doing on Thursday, now? I'm doing Drammer. Oh, oh. I'm directing Drammer. Are you doing, are you affiliated with the university at this time, Mel? I'm directing from afar, let's just say, yes. All right, that's fine, because I know you had a number of complaints.

If we look you up on Rate My Professor, it's a, it's a tough read, pal. What's a complaint but a compliment in disguise? Here, here. I have Shakespeare. So what, and what does Delilah get up to it, the Yoshinoa? Oh my God. She's doing astral readings. Oh, okay.

Yeah. I will put in a plug for you, this particular Yoshinoyer beef bowl. Okay. If you're looking for what used to be a Wii work, they basically allowed it to happen there. They have. So they never say you have to order more beef bowl. As long as you order one beef bowl. bowl. As far as I can tell, this has never been, never been contested. You're good for the day.

So you get a one o'clock beef bowl. No, no, no. I get an 8 a.m. beef bowl and then I'm in there. Oh, but the office, you're not seeing people to one. That's right. But you're there from eight. You can line up. Oh, okay. Yeah. But you say, I'm not talking to you about drama or your grades before one. Plus, I have to get there to get the table before Delilah does. Of course you do. Yeah. You got to get there bright and there. Folks, oh, what did the doctor say about your neck, Mal? That I shouldn't use it. Okay, well, that's going to be tough.

All right. Folks, we're having a wonderful discussion of this. John and Mal handled the scandal. Each episode we talk about a different sex scandal. And today we got a good one. We're talking about it because, of course, it's the month of October and we're leading up to an election. and all month long we've been doing political sex scandals.

We got a lot of letters on our Chapiquitic episode. It's funny that people think we took the wrong side. I know. I don't understand. It doesn't make sense. What are you supposed to do, not drive into the water? When there's two people, two sides of the story, but one of them is gone. Right.

You have no choice but to accept the survivor's story. Absolutely. So we were very much on the side of Ted, and a lot of people says that's not right. And they says it's more of a death scandal than a sex scandal as well. We have a number of complaints about that. Yeah, well, sex and death. They're next door neighbors if you're doing it right. That's right.

On a cul-de-sac. That's right. What do the French call an orgasm, a little murder, a petite mort? A petite moire. Right. See? It's there. It's already there.

It's in the words. Okay, so we had that was, but today we're talking about the granddaddy of them all. Gary Hart and Donna Rice on the monkey business boat. We're going to get deep into that and it's a sexy one, I'll tell you that. But first, there's some, okay, some news about sex scandals we've been following. Okay. Dave Grohl and his wife had been seen out in public without their wedding rings, Mal. But not together?

Not together. Oh, no. She was seen with her tennis coach. Oh, no. It's always the tennis coach. No wonder he had an affair. Of course he did. This is the untold story.

She's been messing around and he says, I get back at you by fathering a baby. There you go. Fire the big guns. You bring a knife, they bring a gun. You bring a gun, they bring Chicago. Pizza. Boy, I'll never forget that.

Sean Connery scooting his way down the hallway in a trail of blood. I'm alone. That was funny. What are you prepared to do? Cheryl Hines has not yet divorced RFK Jr. Okay. Even though he got real intimate with that Olivia Newsy. Right.

And her fiancé hit the bricks. What a name for a reporter? Newsie. What's your name, Newsie? What's your job? Newsie. Why don't you wear a flat cap and knickers, you little roused about? Go have sex with someone.

Extra, extra, read all about it. I had sex with R.S. Here's the thing. The chances of a three-way between RFK, Cheryl Hines, and Olivia Nudsey, have never been better because her fiancé is out of the picture. Oh, and, you know, throw in the bear. The dead baby bear. Yeah.

Yes. Remember death and sex? Death and sex. Speaking of death, R.FK Jr.'s mother. Ethel. Ethel just died. Yeah. I feel like it's very suspicious.

You can't divorce somebody right after their mother dies. Right. Right. Isn't that suspicious? Or on their birthday. Or on their birthday. You can do it on Valentine's Day. That's been ruled upon.

Yes. But you can't, right when their mother died, you can't divorce them. So this is my theory, and I have to say, say it's alleged. It's an allegation. I don't have evidence that RFK murdered his mother at the age of 96

to get out of being divorced. If it looks like a duck and it walks like a duck, he murdered his mother. He murdered his mother with a duck. That's right. And finally, last update, North Carolina,

Mark Robinson, we love this guy. This is the fellow that divides his time equally between a porn website and the private booth of a porn video shop. This is the Nazi? Yeah, the black Nazi wants to own slaves. He says, my entire campaign staff quit. We're better off for it, folks.

The people they who are replaced with are far better. They're taking the cuffs off our campaign. Ah, Jesus Christ. I never heard that expression before. They're taking the cuffs off. That's different. And sexual in its own right. It sure is very sexy when you think about a cuffed-up, a handcuffed campaign.

This guy can't let it go. I kind of hand it to him. Me too. I think he's going to win. He's down 16 points. Is that all? That's all. Wow.

Yeah. That's less than I thought it'd be. I think he's going to take it. And Mal and I are going to North Carolina this weekend to knock on doors for Mark Robinson. And we will like anybody to do. join us out there because we know that's what we need a governor who knows his way around a private booth at a horn video store so often neglected not to say some politicos don't know what it's like in there but they won't admit it at least this guy yes he knows what's going on in there he sometimes would bring in a pizza do you know that chicago pizza north carolina pizza a north carolina style pizza

Wow. What's that like? What does he do? He says, first I'll eat the pizza, then I'll jerk off or the other way around. Or is it somehow involved the pizza? Yes, he's the way I'll go. You could make a dick taco. A dick taco. No. Now, as you know, I have a Google News alert on the words, sex. You must get a lot of Google alerts.

I do. And scandal. and there's a number of other words. Sure, sure. But because of that, I received a news story that made me want to go back to one of our old podcasts we used to do Ion Theater. Sure, sure, sure. This one came up for me here.

Okay. The headline is blood, sex, and severe nausea, a scandal and a full house at the Stuttgart Opera. What? Okay. At the premier performance of the opera Sankta at the state opera in Stuttgart, Germany. 18 spectators sought medical help

amid shock and severe nausea. Why? Something from the show? Yes. The Opera House clarified that one of the, quote, victims of art had problems with blood circulation that were not related to the performance. Oh, okay. So it's only 15?

17. 17. In the description of the new production on the theater's website, the audience was warned that the performance would feature explicit, unsimulated sexual acts. Unsimulated.

That's correct. It also features real blood and stage blood. Okay. Live piercing and wounding. And a lot of naked bodies. The performance also features naked nuns roller skating on a half pipe. How do you tell it's a nun if she's naked? That's a good question.

Yeah. That's a good question. And a wall of crucified naked body. Okay, okay. Regular old Saturday night at your house. Absolutely. That's right. I rarely get the whole wall these days.

But if I can get one or two crucified naked bodies up there on a Saturday night, I'm happy. Sure, sure. It used to be back in the 70s, used to be all four walls. It was easier. Director Florentine. Holzinger is known for freewheeling performances. No shit. That blur the line between dance, theater, and vaudeville.

I don't hear a lot of vaudeville in there. Do you? Well, roller skating nuns. I guess so. That's as close as I can get. Perl female cast. Typically performs partially or fully naked. And previous shows have included live sword, swallowing, tattooing, masturbation, and

action paintings with blood and fresh excrement. What's an action painting? I don't know, but I'm glad the excrement is fresh and not frozen. Thord, it's not the same. How fresh is the excrement? That would be my question. I'm assuming if they're calling it fresh excrement, you're seeing it emerge on stage. Well, here, this is addressed in my last, according to Holzinger, quote,

good technique and dance to me is not just someone who can do a perfect tundoo, but also someone who can urinate on cue. That has the benefit of rhyming. Yeah. And you always hear about people who can cry on Q. What about those that can urinate, defecate, or ejaculate on Q? And sometimes all three. All three at the same time.

Now that I'd like to see in Stuttgart, Germany. I would too. And if they can cry, that deserves an egot. That's a bigger Egot. The U, uh, tier, U-T, defecate E. And if you have a U-T-D-E, yes. The dute. The dute.

Okay. Mal, have you ever been so nauseous that you had to call an ambulance? Um. I mean, you were eating at the Yoshinoya Beef Bowl every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Friday. Oh, no, no. I'm eating at most days. Oh, I see. My office hours.

Okay. I've got an eye in stomach and I've, if anything, I've developed more of a tolerance for the Yoshinoyer beef bowl. Yeah, I'm on a street food diet these days. Meaning like street trucks? I don't like a truck. I like a cart. Oh, yeah. Or just an improvised grill on a sidewalk.

I see. Where they're taking a sausage and they're wrapping it baking. Yeah. And they put it on a stick. And sometimes they don't even charge you. They're just doing that for fun. Good.

For the art. The art, that's what we stand for. That's what we're doing. The art is and put me out on a street food diet. Oh, boy. It's been good to do this. It's really helped. me. It's very good for me to do this bygazel. I'm going to drink a little. We're working out.

It helps me keep my neck on a swivel, even though my neck is basically cemented straight. Yeah. Okay, we should do an ad now for better help. They're still with us, huh? Huh? They're still with us? They're still with us. They don't, I've been told, they don't really listen. Mal, it's very important to go see a therapist. Really, is it? Yes. And the better help is you go on there and you see one. Okay, back to the show.

I mean, come on. If you really want therapy, come see me at the Eugnoir beef bowl at my office hours. I'm doing it all. That's true. And he's also not licensed. No. All right. And I'm reading astral, doing astral readings just to compete with Deli.

You're horning in on Deliard. Absolutely I am. Holy shit. Can she put? Hexes on people? No. Okay. No.

I hope not. All right. Okay. You're ready. Let's talk about the sex scandal that rocked. The Mason and the yachting business of Gary. What do you know about Gary Hart? Nothing.

That all happened when I had gone into a wine coma. Oh, a wine coma? Comer. Yeah. A coma. I was cober toast. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, I had had so much wine and only wine that I was out for a number of months in the 80s. Oh, really? Yes. Oh, my God. So refresh me if you would. Gary Hart was a senator from the great state of Colorado. He lost the 1984 primary to be the Democratic candidate because Walter Mondale said, where's the beef? I want, oh, political.

Recaps by Don DeMiller. In those days, you could win an election. Here's what he says. He says to him, Gary, listening to your plans, I'm reminded of that television commercial. Where's the beef? That did it. That was it. That's all it took in those days.

That's all it took. Nobody had ever said anything that funny. No. In the political context. Like when Howard Dean did a slightly funny scream. Yeah. He was done. In those days, the tiniest thing.

could move everything. But now it's 19, going on the 1988 campaign. Gary Hart, everybody says, okay, Mondale shit the bed. That spirit of Where's the Beef did not carry through, and Reagan beat him. That was 84. Yeah. Where was the rest of the, where was, where's the, where's the beef? People were asking in come November.

Wait a minute. Huh? Okay. Mondale was running against Hart for the Democratic. That's right. And he beat him, but he got beat by Reagan. Yeah. But Mondale had asked Hart, where's the beak?

That's right. And so come 88, then what? Well, in 88, huh? Well, Reagan said, I'm not going to hold your youth against you. Right. And that joke won him the presidency. That's right. You needed one joke.

I remember. Now it's 1987. Everybody wants to know who's going to. to run against George W.H. Bushing for the president now. And it's going to be maybe probably Gary Hart. Because he's a fine looking fellow, right? He's got a thick head of hair. Right. He's a good looking guy. He's like best friends in the world with Warren Beatty. Red flag. For both of them. Red flag. But he's, uh, and he's, he came in second. He came, Everybody says, well, all right, this time he'll be ready for the beef joke.

We can trust him. So he's the frontrunner far and away. Nobody could touch Gary Hart. He's way ahead in the polls. He is going to be the Democratic Party. And he's polling so far ahead of George Bush. It's blue skies, blue skies. Got it?

I got it. Now, a week before, he's going to announce it, he's got to run for the presidency. His buddy says to him, hey, let's go blow off some steam. Who's his buddy, Warren, baby? No, a guy named Bill Broadhurst. Okay. And Bill Gary Hart had two body men. What?

Two body men. What? You know what a body man is? No, works on his collar? No. The body man is a guy who always, you could always turn to him and say, give me a breath bit. Oh.

Or whatever. Oh, yeah, yeah, fixer, an aide to camp, a factotum, a his man, Friday. That's it he had a his man Friday, but he had a Friday and a Saturday. No kidding. He had two. It's very unusual. He had one who said, now, Gary, you're going to get too bad early. We can't digging, bing, ding, ding, ding, thing, thing, thing, thing. And then he had another one who said, let's go blow off some steam in Miami. Yeah, you got an angel and the devil sit down his little shoulders. That's what he had. It's very unusual. Oh, this is the crux of old drummer. You've got to have conflict. That's right. You've got to have the good versus the bad. Continue.

They were both names. Billy. Oh, boy. Billy number two says, let's go down to Miami. I've charted a boat. We'll go out there and we're going to have some fun. International water. Oh, brother, why not?

And Gary says, yeah, it's a week before I'm going to announce my presidential run. This is, let's think of this as like a bachelor party before I get married to being president. Sure, sure. I'm all a tingle. Daddy, go down there. and it happens that he's chartered a boat called monkey business. Okay. Did Angel Billy come with him?

No. He wouldn't have anything to do with it. He doesn't know about it. Oh, they didn't even tell him. I don't think they told him. Oh, boy, it gets better and better. Angel Billy has the weekend off. This is all devil all the time.

All right. They get out there on the monkey business. It's a big party on the monkey business. Sure, sure. And they're just going for a little air and back. Sure. Who should come on the boat but a gal named Donner? Rice.

Donna Rice had previously dated Don Henley. My God. Of Eagles and Prince Albert, the son of Grace Kelly and the Prince of Monaco. My God. And a famous Arabian arms dealer. She had been around. I'll see. What a Globetrotter.

She was a beauty pageant winner as well. Okay. Miss South Carolina World. I don't understand that. Miss South Carolina World. Okay. South Carolina World. Sure, sure.

Now, she met Gary Hart at Don Henley's New Year's Eve party. When she's dating, Dawn? That's right. My God, this woman can just latch onto someone like a parasite. I know. Host to host. It's just three months later, and she's free and easy and hooking up with Gary again on the boat. But it's a little short cruise, so Gary says, here's what?

Tomorrow, I want you to come back on the monkey business with me. Me and Billy are going to go over to Bimini, and we're going to pick up his boat, which is being worked on there. What's that one called? I don't know the name of that one. That's a good question. Animal Crackassus. Horse feathers.

Or maybe it's just called fucking the boat. So he says we're going to have a runch on the monkey business. We're going to go out to Bimini, and then we're going to pick up Bill and Bullitt. And we're going to munch on the lungy business. And he says, we're all going to come back and everything will be nice. So she says, I'll bring a friend. She says, so now it's Gary and Billy and Donner and Lynn.

Lynn? Now, this is where I'd come in. I always get the friend when I'm with you. But I don't mind it. I don't mind it. I say bring a friend from Mal. And then I always, I keep it in my wallet. I hand them your list of specifications.

My rider. Your writer. What do you expect? Okay. Rice, by the way, at that time. Oh, she had also been on an episode of Miami. No kidding. She was an actress and a model and a pharmaceutical rep.

Okay. So now they go out, they get blasted on the way out. Sure they do. They get so drunk. They get so day drunk that they get up on stage at a bar and they sing and they dance. Oh, boy. And then when it comes time to go home, they say we can't because Billy's boat isn't ready yet. We're going to have to spend the night in Bimini.

And you think that's true? I doubt it. Here's the next thing I doubt. All right. Gary and Donna have always insisted that Gary and Billy slept on Billy's boat. And Donna and Lynn slept on the money. To this day. To this day.

No kid. But Lynn says she woke up in the middle of the middle. in the night and Donna wasn't there. Okay. So Donna insists that. Linda does not. Lynn says that was the sleeping arrangement, but Donna was missing in the middle of the night.

Oh, Lynn must not have liked Billy, huh? I guess not. That's another through line for my analogy to this story. I know. I always lose him. Whenever Mal and I go on a double date, his date goes missing. I drive you guys home.

Yes. And we appreciate it. All right. What do we got? And sometimes, you know, because you're also an Uber driver, we work it out so that it's, you get paid for it. I mean, there's a silver lining to everything. Not all the time, but sometimes you're right. Sometimes.

Yeah, yeah. We don't tip. Okay. So they went back. And you downvote me every time you give me a poor star rating, which I don't fully understand, but I take with stride. Well, we're trying to keep you humble. I like a humble mouth. All right.

What happened now? They sail back to Miami. Billy promises both girls a job. Oh, boy. Now, okay. Now what happens? He announces his campaign. Everything's going wonderful.

And then until, unfortunately, this fellow at the Miami Herald is working at night. he gets a phone call from abroad. She says, hey, that Gary Hart, he fucked my friend on a boat. This is Lynn. Everybody thought it was Lynn for decades. Not Lynn? It is and it isn't because what happened was Lynn took a picture of Gary and Donna

sitting on his lap and he's wearing a shirt that says, Bucky business. They gave them a shirt. Wow. And so Lynn has this picture, and she shows it to her friend whose name is Weems. What's her first name? Weems. I don't know.

I got her first name somewhere. That's good enough. This is the Linda Tripp of the story. Okay. Ms. Weems. Here we go. Dana Weems. She says, Dana Weems says,

Oh, Donna Rice, sitting there Gary Hart's lap. Oh, she's not so pretty. She's okay for commercials, I guess, but I'm better looking. I don't like her. So she calls the Miami Herald, and Linda's in the room when she made the call. And she calls it, she says, hey, that Gary Hart, like my friend. And, furthermore, do you pay for pictures? Uh-oh.

Oh, brother. Now this is when things go crazy Because the Miami Oh and she also says Not only that but my friend Donna Rice The one that fuck She's going up to meet him In Washington D.C. this weekend

And the Miami Harold guy says Here's what we'll do We'll stake out Gary Hart's Townhouse in Washington D.C. And we'll see if a broad Comes and goes And they did And she did

but then Gary Hart knew he was being surveilled. How? He looked out the window and he saw, they ended up. A Miami Herald truck. Yeah. The Miami Herald guy is so dumb. He says, I'm staking him out of here. I need backup because I might fall asleep or have to go to the bathroom.

And so they end up with like five different guys. Oh, my God. Is this a legitimate newspaper or is it a rag? The Harold. Yeah. A little bit of both, I guess. All right. All right.

It's Miami. Yeah, that's right. So Gary says, now Gary, by the way, I don't know if you knew this about Gary Hart, probably not. He has written five spy novels. What?

Yeah. No shit. Yeah. Sometimes under a pseudonym of John Blackthorn. What are the titles? Oh, I'll have to look it up. You look them up. You go.

And that's one of the pseudonym of John Blackthorn. the things that they talked about on the monkey business, he told Donna Rice the whole plot of his upcoming spy novel. She must have been riveted! So now Gary Hart, like a chapter out of one of his spy novels, he sees he's being staked out front of his house. He says, here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to make myself conspicuous to these guys, and they're going to follow me into

the alleyway behind my house, and I'm going to be waiting for him there, and I'm going to turn the tables on him. And it works, except it was stupid because they had a lot of very hard questions for him. So he's face to face. Did they ask him about his two spy novels? One he co-authored with Senator William S. Cohen called Double Man. And the other one called The Strategies of Zeus. Maybe, but he's got three more under the pseudonym, John Blackthorn.

Okay. Including one called The Patriot, which I think kind of addresses this, his air. episode. Blackthorn thrillers. Oh, he's got five of those alone. All right. Sanctioned, disavowed, rogue, ghosts, and that's all they've got.

Oh, okay. So he says, one word titles. That's it. People don't have time for more than one word. Yeah, I guess not. Okay. All right. So now he's, you got the front runner for the Democratic.

In an alleyway with five Miami Herald guys. All right. All right. What a showdown drama. Oh, my God. What will our hero do? The odds are too big. Turn back.

No, he can't. He can't. They take a terrible picture of him. And they ask him all these questions. And they know all about Donner and the, monkey business and he's there going, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. And they know that she came and she left and she was there all night, apparently. And he's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

I love it. Yeah. Now, he thought he could survive because what he says is, he says, these dipshits. Is he married, by the way? Oh, I'm sorry, yes. Children? Uh, yes. Okay. Maybe one child. But then three under the pseudonym of Blackthorne. That's right. And by the way, he had a reputation before this. People were already whispering about this guy because he and his wife would separate from time to time.

Oh, one of those. Yeah, they had a number of separations during which time he would squire ladies around town. I see. I see. He's a gentleman. A gentleman. It might have been the kind of a thing where he would squire ladies around town and then when people said what do you go?

He said, well, we're separating me and my wife. And then he would say he was wife, if people ask you was, I separated then just please say yes. Sounds like that. Anyways, they didn't watch the back door. So it became a funny thing. He says, he says, no, no, no. She came over at 10 o'clock and she left at 10.30 by the back door. Oh.

Something. But they never saw her leave. in the morning? That's right. They did not see her leaving the morning, but because they left. I don't know. Right. Well, facts aren't important. Who cares? So anyway, then the Washington Post had another story about another woman and so hard said, I won't try to be president anymore. Leave me alone. He got a nice letter from Richard Nixon telling him that he handled a difficult situation uncommonly well. Wow. And that's it.

That was the end of fucking fucking Gary Hart. Man. Now, well, okay. He and Donna have always said to this day that they never had the sex. Uh-huh. But they probably had it on the boat and in his Washington townhouse. But nobody, to this day, they say we never had any of them sexes. Okay.

So I don't know, but I think they did. Any number of sexes were not had by rice and heart. That's what they say. But he was finished. And now he's 87 years old, living in Colorado, writing spy novels under a pseudonym. Hey, man, sounds pretty good if you ask him me. I guess so. He's got a, he's been a lawyer.

He's probably retired. But doing all kinds of shit. Did he stay married with his wife? Still married to this day doing wise. Wow, that speaks a lot about him to be able to forgive her jealousy. Yes, that's true. She probably was a real pain in the air. I know.

For a while they're saying, not again, Gary, not again. Where are you going? Don't worry about it. Good. How many more? How many more? I feel so badly for the men. All they want to do is cheat on their wives all the time.

And then they get caught in such a big thing and it ends their career. Yeah. And now that, you know what I mean? They're not their marriage. Not their marriage. But they're just home all that. Like you think of all of Bill Clinton. Has he been able to have any more affairs since losing to get, I don't know.

Poor guy. Poor guy. What happened? Oh. Something happened to live stream, and it? Matt might notice the chat has stopped. First of all, who's Matt? What?

And why would he have noticed? The podcast recording is the primary goal. Streaming failures are rare, but they have happened, says Jeff. That's correct. It's good point. From the Miami Herald. Hey, wait a minute. They're still commenting.

How is the chat stopped? of this still coming. Why is the stream stopped? The stream stopped. What can I do? Stream finished. I guess the stream is finished. Did you put a timer on it or something?

No. I don't know. All right. Sorry, Lodge, James. This is something that happened. Anyways, in Stern, where was it? Let's talk about what has become of Donna Rice.

All right? She nowadays, she hates people. porn and loves Trump. Oh, boy. And this is, this one, this one hits me. She's in a group. She's got a group called Enough is Enough.

Okay. And it's an anti-porn group. And with her group, she lobbied to have McDonald's and Starbucks add filters to block porn on their Wi-Fi networks. Did she get it? Yeah. And she got it. She did that.

Wow. She's right up there with Tip of Gore. You ever wonder why you? you can't get porn at McDonald's? Yes. Why do you think of all the office hours at the Yoshinoa people? That's what I'm thinking they don't have the blockers at the Yoshinoa people. They've got a like a, they unthrottle it.

If anything, it's forced on you there. Yes, yes. I mean, I'm not complaining. No, of course. They give you the Wi-Fi password specifically for, with the suggestion of some porn sites you can go to. Their landing page is just a landing strip. Let me put it that way.

I used to go to McDonald's exclusively for the porn on the Wi-Fi. Right. And then I noticed it was, I couldn't do it anymore, but I never knew it was Donna Rice who did that. Oh, boy. Unbelievable. And she also has publicly spoken out against Teen Vogue for their article, titled, Anal Sex, What You Need to Know, How to Do It the Right Way.

Teen Boat had an article called that. Donald Rice didn't like that. But I bet she wasn't able to read that in a McDonald's or a Starbucks. Hello. In November of 2017, she joined this other lady at the invitation of Homemakers for America for the grand opening of the Museum of the Bible in Washington, D.C. to ring a replica of the Liberty Bell. Oh, so she really went the other way, huh?

she sure did she's very Trumpy she loves Trump so she's still out there roaming the street I'm gonna just Google a picture of these two now because I remember what they look like then you do yeah let's see that picture of them on the monkey business

which it didn't come out until he already dropped out of the race oh really yeah yeah Royce people think the picture killed him but she still looks pretty good She's looking at her now? Yeah. She's got a, you could go to Enough is Enough their website.

I don't know. Oh, there's the monkey business pick. Uh-huh. Yeah, look at that. Oh, yeah. They're on a pier. See that. They had a nice time.

Yeah. He said later, he said, I didn't know the name of the boat. I had no idea. The boat was called monkey, and then they said, well, you're wearing a shirt that's his monkey business. I didn't know what my shirt is. I just love the Mox brothers. It says monkey business crew. Oh, no, monkey business crew.

He might as well say, I own this boat. Oh, my God. One thing that tells us is that for at least some amount of time, he was shirtless on the boat. Good for him. Why does it tell us that? Well, because he had to have changed his shirt, don't you think? Oh, right.

He changed his shirt on the boat at least. All right. Okay. Now, we're going to give great. this sex scandal on a scale of one to five girls. Okay. I give it, I give it three girls.

Yeah, I give it three as well because there's really not much sex. There's not a lot of sex. He got caught real early in the sex process. He could have had a lot more sex with Donna Rice. Yeah, actually, I'm going to go with it too. Really? Yeah. This is tame by current day standards.

if there was sex, we don't know about it. And even if there wasn't, they're all saying there wasn't. Yeah. At least with Clinton, you know, there was some DNA evidence. Yeah, that was such a good one, boy, I tell you. Also, a lot of people are big fans of the Mark Sanford scandal. I think we gave that. Is that the one where he went on a walkabout?

Well, he said, hey, everybody on my staff, I'm going to walk the Appalachian trails so long, and then they couldn't find him. And then it turns out he was in Argentina. which is not where the Appalachian trail is. No. And he was, he had a lady down there and he came back and he said, it was remarkable because he said,

yes, I was fucking abroad in Argentina. But understand me now. She is the love of my life. Oh boy. So he left his wife? He did. That was a good one.

But what else was I going to tell? Oh, people should know the tickets are on sale now for the radio city music all Christmas spectacular here we go here we go this is exciting I've been auditioning rockets since January I of course have been acting as dramaturg yes you have been you've been looking into the origins of Santa Claus and breasts and breasts oh that reminds me mal and I are going to be at the barns noble yeah at the Americana brand signing tits You'd better get there right when we start

because there's a good chance we're not going to be there that long. That's right. We haven't done this particular Barnes & Noble before. Just say, here's the plan. Much like in Smoky and the Bandit, trying to avoid Smokey, the police on their frequency of the CBs, they start in the basement and move up a channel each time they talk. So if you can't find us,

at Barnes & Noble, we've probably moved to the Williams Sonoma. Right. Or. Seas candies. Seas candies. Or there's a Tiffany? Sure there is. There's an Apple store.

Yes, very good. We'll go there. The Cheesecake Factory. I don't know about the Cheesecake Factory. No? And they make you wait so long to get a table. And then the final place will be as in the AMC Cinema. It will be signing breasts at the screening of Wild Robo.

Wild robots. Oh, that's a good one. Citing Breast said Wild Robot. This year, Mal, the rockets are so beautiful. Yeah. Every one of them, not only the exact same height,

but the exact same mass. My God. How'd you do it? I have been submerging them in water. Oh, you didn't audition with strict parameters. You changed them. This is what I did. For years, I was taking their word on mass and using calipers, of course.

But this year, we have a new system of displacement, water displacement to determine mass. Okay. Every rocket is guaranteed to be the exact same height and the precise same mass throughout the production of the show. Now, how do you feel about rockets that have their mass proportioned differently? Like maybe there's more mass in the hips As opposed to the breasts or vice versa Well, no, we don't tolerate that at all Okay, so everyone's got the same silhouette in proportions as well

That's right. We also silhouette them. I see. You've got a plywood cut out of the perfect silhouette And they have to be able to walk through it without touching it And there's only a millimeter of space on each side. Exactly. And it's very splintery. So they benefit. through. And you tell them that so they can check it out up to the last second and some of them do.

Oh, many of them do. Yes, they do. Because they know. Exactly. Well, so that's, if that doesn't convince you to come and see the radio city music, oh, it's a spectacular. What will? I don't know.

All right, Mel. Anything further you want to say about anything? I've just been working on some spy novels. Oh, you have been? Self, yes. Under what name, Mal? Richard. Just Richard.

Well, I didn't want to do one-word titles, but I wanted to do one-word author. Oh, good, okay. Richard. Look out for the spy novels of Richard. How many words in the title, typically? Good, 16 to 20. Oh, that's good. Yeah, so I don't even remember half of them.

Don't give away the ending in the title. I won't. I did, but I won't. Okay. All right, folks, that's another episode 69. of Don and Mal handle the scandals. We'll see you next time. Boy, nine.

Bonus nanza extravaganza is brought to you by Andy Daly with Matt Goreley. It was mixed and edited by Mark McComwell, and executive produced by Andy Daley and Matt Goreley.