Bookwild - Audra McElyea: One Little Word

Episode Date: April 6, 2022

On this episode, I talk to Audra McElyea about her mind bending debut novel One Little Word.You can also watch the episode on YouTubeAuthor LinksInstagramGoodreadsWebsiteCheck out the book hereOne Little Word SynopsisAllegra Hudson was murdered.An anonymous “source” drops the note into recently widowed Madeleine Barton’s lap exactly when she needs it most. As a new single mother, she is struggling to make ends meet as a freelance reporter, and covering the mysterious death of local bestselling author Allegra Hudson could be the career-launching story of her dreams.Working with Allegra’s grieving husband, Connor, Madeleine plunges down the rabbit hole of the writer’s privileged life. The deeper she digs, the more dirt she finds: a conniving best friend, a stalker ex-boyfriend, and a marriage in shambles. The closer Madeleine gets to the truth, the murkier the waters become.Her source’s looming presence and constant meddling in her investigation paired with her growing bond with Connor over their shared grief have blinded her to the facts, but nothing explains why Allegra Hudson’s life feels so familiar. Only one thing is certain: Madeleine can trust no one.One Little Word is a deliciously clever game of cat-and-mouse with a completely unexpected twist. Get Bookwild MerchCheck Out My Stories Are My Religion SubstackCheck Out Author Social Media PackagesCheck out the Bookwild Community on PatreonCheck out the Imposter Hour Podcast with Liz and GregFollow @imbookwild on InstagramOther Co-hosts On Instagram:Gare Billings @gareindeedreadsSteph Lauer @books.in.badgerlandHalley Sutton @halleysutton25Brian Watson @readingwithbrian 

Hi, my name is Kate and I love to read. Like, I was carrying books around with me before Kindles were a thing. So I decided to start a podcast where I interview the authors of some of my favorite books, ask them all of my questions so that I can read between the lines of the books. Welcome back to another episode of Between the Lines. I'm here with Audra McLeay, who is the author of One Little Word, which was just an absolutely amazing thriller that I read here recently. So welcome to the podcast, Audra. Thank you for having me. Yeah. So before we get into the book, I did want to learn a little bit about you. So when did you know that you wanted to be an author or when did you know you wanted to write a book? Well, I didn't ever really decide. It kind of was decided for me.

Okay. So I went to school and that was for, being a corporate buyer, which I did do for a while. And I just kind of felt like the Lord was trying to tell me I needed to be a writer. And I just was like, no, I don't want to do that. I have no idea where to start. So to make a really long story short, I said no for a while. And eventually all the doors kind of closed in my face that should have been opened. We were moving around a lot for my husband's job and things for me career-wise were just not working out, things that should have worked out. And so I was like, well, okay, I guess I'll start.

And so that was in 2012. So I wrote about half a book in three months. And then I gave up and I was like, you know what? Like, I don't want to do this. And had babies. And then when I was pregnant with my second child in 2016, I got put on bed rest for five months. Oh, wow. And so I was like, you know, maybe I'll just finish that book because I've got nothing better to do than to sit here for five months. Right. So I finished that in 2016,

and that was not this book. That was a book that got shelved, but that really got me started in writing, helped me learn all the do's and don'ts and help me kind of figure out what my genre was going to be because that was more of a women's fiction book with a little hint of suspense and, you know, after querying and learning a lot from other writers in women's fiction writers association, I decided my next one was going to be like straight up suspense. So I've really, I really just learned a whole lot from that book that got shelved for ever. Yeah. As far as I'm concerned, it's going to be shoved in a drawer for eternity. Yeah. I know some people have said, like they will shelve them and then publish them, but you don't think that you're going to try

to get that one published. I would have to rework it so much to make it match the other four that I've written, or the other three that I've, the other three that I've written that are just, I mean, they're all very psychological suspense thrillery, and that one would have to really be reworked to match the genre. Yeah. Yeah, I talked to Ashley Winstead earlier this year, and she wrote in my dreams I Hold a Knife which was a really another really good psychological thriller I've heard of that it was great and then her second one that's coming out is just like a complete rom-com and she was like I don't know what I'm thinking but it was really good so maybe you could cross genres too maybe maybe so what is your writing process like so do you kind of know where

your story's going do you outline how do you approach it well like I said I've written four books and this one little word was a really special case. It's not gone like any of the others. Oh, wow. So that one, I had a dream about that one as a movie. So it was kind of done for me for the most part. Like the main twist was there and I really just had to fill in the blanks and it was like starring Johnny Depp so I changed it to a woman filled in the blanks and went with it. So I wrote that in a month because I had so much. of it like just already played out for me. Uh-huh.

And so I wrote that in a month. Of course, I edited it a lot after that. But I got it out of my brain and onto paper in a month. And that was just kind of like a give me. Yeah. I mean, I still had to work a lot. But, you know, the hard thing I think to come up with is a really good twist. And so that was just kind of handed to me somehow.

Yeah. That was nice. but normally I will come up with a twist first and you know kind of have the plot leading up to that have a good twist and if I can't think of a good twist then I don't write it yeah I come up with that first and then I kind of go through and like figure out the characters and then I'll do an outline and then I'll just start writing from beginning to end I don't I don't veer and write certain scenes that excite me more I know a lot of writers do that yeah I just go from the beginning to the end and just like force myself through. Yeah. I do a very detailed

chapter by chapter outlines, so I don't have to think too much. Yeah, I feel like that would make it a lot easier when you then go to like actually write it out. Yeah. Yeah. So how do you create your characters then? Do you like intentionally flush them out or do you kind of get to know them as you're writing it? Hmm. Well, I figure out what they're doing first and based off of what they're doing kind of helps me figure out their character as I go. So I kind of have an outline before, but then I really flesh it out as we're going, depending on what it is they're doing. I'm very, I'm very plot-driven. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That was obvious for sure. But there's no one like character depth, too. Sometimes when it is all plot, you don't like connect to the characters, but I feel like I was

really connected to the characters, too. How would you describe one little word in just a couple sentences for anyone who hasn't read it. I like to say it's kind of a mix of vertigo and inception. So it's definitely got that psychological element of inception. So if you enjoy that and you enjoy, you know, a hood on it, you're going to love

the story, hopefully. And it definitely has like that Hitchcockian vibe. Yeah. Of suspense that doesn't kind of spell everything out for you. You don't really see gore and that kind of thing. It's kind of left to your imagination. So I would say it's Hitchcockian Chris Nolan mixed together. Yeah. I think that's a good description. My two favorite directors. Yeah. Yeah, I would totally agree with that description. So you said that you had a dream, at least about like the main

twist. Was there anything else? Like, do you think anything prompted you to even have that dream? Or was it really just the whole, the dream itself that prompted you to write it. The dream definitely prompted me to write it, but I will say secret windows like one of my faves. So he was kind of, you know, this movie or this book is about an author. So in that movie, he is an author and he kind of had like the same vibe in my dream. So I would say it was driven by inspiration, movies that inspired me. and also what I wanted to write anyway, and then I kind of mixed in, you know, my elements of Hitchcock and Nolan. Yeah. And just kind of made it my own. For sure. And switched it to a woman's point of view, too.

Yep. Because that was important to me. Yeah. Yeah. I loved that part of it. So we are going to get into some spoilers. So if you haven't read the book at this point, just pause and go read it and then come back. But if If you're here because you've already read the book, then you can just keep listening. So one of my favorite parts about the book was you do feel kind of disoriented throughout the whole book itself. Like some of the stuff feels like it's kind of not quite fitting together or that it is kind of fitting together. But you can't totally understand exactly what's happening. So how did you kind of approach keeping Madeline and Allegra's story? separate without giving away the big twist.

That was the challenge. So it's hard because when you're writing or when I'm writing, I want to have enough clues to where you could figure out what the ending is, but not so many that it's going to be obvious. And to find that perfect mix is difficult. So that's where a lot of beta readers come in. And I wanted them to, to get to the point in several drafts, it took several drafts, several different, several different

kind of versions to get there. But I wanted them all to be able to come back to me and say, I didn't see the twist coming, but now I can kind of six sense it and go back and read it and it makes sense. So it was important for me to have this lingering feeling of when you watch the sixth sense for the first time and you're like, wait, I need to go back and watch that again and see if that all makes sense. That's what I wanted. And I also wanted, and nobody has talked to me about this yet. So I found this very interesting, but on the last page, nobody's asked me about the sirens, if that's real or not. Right. Most people just want to say that's, you know, they're assuming that everything's good and that actually was like an ambulance or something. And

I wanted to have that spinning top effect of Inception where you're kind of like, wait a minute, was that really an ambulance or is she still in the hospital? Yeah, yeah. It really is a lot like the end of inception. I hadn't even thought of that comparison. I love that. So the relationship between Madeline and Graham is so sweet. And I did read in your acknowledgments that Graham was kind of a combination of your boys.

So what was it like distilling them into a character? It was really fun. Of course, I wrote this book in 2017, so they were several years younger then. Yeah. My eldest was more the age of Graham, and now my youngest is more the age of Graham. Actually, he's still a little bit older than Graham. But that was super fun, and I wanted to show the, like, the hot mess that parenting can be, but also like how sweet and endearing your child is to you at the same time.

But it's not all like rainbows and butterflies for sure. So she has a hard time and she struggles. But, you know, at the end of the day, she's just really fortunate and blessed to be his mom. And he does a lot of silly things and leaves his toys out and, you know, things that annoy your parents. And, but, you know, he's still a good kid at the end of the day. Yeah. But it was important for me to kind of have like those struggles in there. Yeah, I mean, especially as a single mom and a widowed mom, it would be so stressful.

Like thankfully she did have the support of her mom, but obviously that's not the case for everybody. Right. But that relationship was cool too with her mom. So the book does have, you've kind of mentioned, the very like Hitchcockian edge to it. and you've mentioned that Vertigo was kind of an inspiration for the book as well so when did your love of Hitchcock kind of develop and what inspired you to write a book in that style um I would say just in middle high school um my parents always watched a lot of old movies I was kind of raised watching like Nick at Night shows and like old school stuff and then like the TGIF that every all the other kids watched too But, you know, I was just really drawn to the old style. It wasn't overly gory, like, at the time that I was watching those.

It was like scream, and all of those kind of slasher films were sort of big, which is fine. But I wanted to kind of leave more to the imagination. And I feel like that is a lot scary than actually seeing some of the things. and kind of letting your mind wander around like, oh, wow, because your mind can go a lot of different places that are a lot of times worse than the slasher movies go to. So like those elements of just what's going on. Yeah. And not knowing for a long time sometimes can be a lot more suspenseful than your really scary films. So I wanted to have that.

I think it speaks to a lot more audiences to not have so much cussing and so. much blood and guts and gore and all that stuff too. So I definitely wanted it to be something that my kids could read sooner than later. Yeah. So that was in my head too. I have some nieces that are 13 and 17. I kind of wanted to keep it PG-13 to keep more of a broad audience as well. So that was, that was important to me. Yeah. And there was a two-part, there was a two-part question that you said. You said, I can't remember the second part now. I think you did because I just said when did you start to love Hitchcock and then like how did it inspire it? So I think you covered it.

So you also kind of covered that it was kind of with the help of beta readers that you decided which hint to use. But how did you like completely decide which hints to include or maybe which ones to take away? So was there like similar feedback from some of the readers or did you like keep any of it? and that maybe like you're like no I do want to leave that one in there actually weren't anything there weren't any things that I took out okay um there were things that I needed to add in oh okay so it needed to be a little more um clued in from the beginning I know Kimberly Bell was one of my readers early on and she suggested you know she obviously had read the book and knew what was going to happen and she suggested the scene where we kind of flashback to where Allegra and

Madeline actually meet because I never had them meet and so she had she wanted them to meet and kind of have an interaction and be like oh we share the same birthday which is funny because me and Kimberly Bill actually shared the same birthday which I didn't know I didn't know that until much later I didn't put that together but it's funny because she's like what if they just like find out they they share the same birthday and they kind of bond you. over that and they have like this moment together. Yeah. And so the investigation isn't just, you know, a random author that she just was inspired by and loved.

It's like she actually met her and they kind of had a bond. So that was a really big one that I added in. Yeah. And Marcus and Detective Wentworth were actually not in the book until one of the later drafts. So those were added characters to add more kind of subplots. Yeah. So that was interesting. Now, I can't imagine it without those two.

Right. Yeah, because she's kind of like Wentworth is definitely making you like nervous about what's going to happen to Madeline. So it kind of like raises up the suspense more as well. But that's really cool. I talked to Kimberly actually about my darling husband earlier a couple months ago. I love her books. She's great. She's amazing.

And she's just, she's one of those authors that really. reached out and helped me. Yeah. I didn't know her previously. Oh, wow. And, you know, I was like a nobody writer, like, and I still am, but she was just so happy to help. It was just incredible. She's just such a kind person. Yeah, she's really cool. And brilliant. Yeah, that too. Her books never disappoint. I love them all. Yeah, I know. That's how I feel like. I just always, like, I don't like, with books, if the reviews look good enough, I typically try not to even read. I, you know, much of the synopsis because I'm like especially with the thriller genre it's like I want to go in as blind as possible if I can so I love finding the authors and she's one of them where it's like

I'm just going to buy it and start it like I don't need to know too much about it right because then you go through and somebody always spoils something anyway yeah that's too that too that is the absolute worst even if it's like not a big spoil but like they're dressing something they specifically didn't like and you're like oh now I think I know what it is. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And you can't, you can't unread it. You just know. Right, right. But I tend to write short, kind of to answer that question a little bit more in depth. I tend to write short and then elaborate more later as I go through the different drafts. That makes sense. So I usually don't cut much. I just add. Nice. Nice. So discovering the whole

plot that Allegra slash Madeline had basically recreated her whole world but kind of like named it differently and kind of made things look a little bit different was so cool because it even just like what you're talking about with the sixth sense it was a very similar thing where I was like okay that's where I had because sometimes I would like highlight things and I'd be like okay like how Graham met Connor or how Connor met Graham was like so similar to Allegro's story too and I was like okay so some of this is similar but I don't know why so I don't think I ever could have guessed it like I wouldn't have guessed it and I liked that it was it was such a unique twist in that way where like it was far enough out there that I wasn't going to guess it but then it made sense when I found out but kind of then like looking back on

all of the things that then lined up I was like so when you said that violet and Ivy were basically the same people. I was like, oh, yeah, she sometimes called her, I don't know if you would have pronounced it, Vi or V. I know some people would just go by me? I say bye. Okay.

So what, did you do that? Did she give her that nickname literally because that's like the inverse of Ivy? I don't think I did that, but somebody, somebody once asked me if I used the name Allegra because, oh, what was it? they said. Oh, because of the word allegory. Oh, yeah.

And how, like, something stands for something and really means something else. And so the whole, like, book would be symbolic of something that you didn't really recognize from the beginning. And I was like, I don't know. Maybe subconsciously I did. But I don't think I did that. That's fascinating. It's possible.

My subconscious mind likes to work in ways that I don't always know about, like, my dream and stuff. It really meant. I was literally like driving somewhere after I had finished the book and was just like still thinking about it. And I was like, wait a second. Those were like the inverse of each other. I wonder if that was on purpose. So I didn't notice it until like way later actually. But we'll just say that it was your subconscious.

Okay. We'll just say that it was. And that's why I'll like your own scholar. The other thing that like I wasn't expecting, but that I also loved was that it was like, a love story by the end of the book and I was so attached but through the whole thing I was like this doesn't make sense that like he would fall in love so quickly and she would fall in love with him like given everything and so I was so torn through the whole book and then when I got to the end I was like super happy that like I could go ahead and be happy about it basically but I like truly

was choked up in the last line of the book where it said, all I can focus on now is the man walking toward me, the man I love who also loves me, the man who can find me anywhere. And I was just like, that is just the sweetest thing I've ever read, especially in a thriller. So when you started writing the book, were you kind of like planning on exploring, like how really deep love can reach you anywhere, or did you kind of decided to include that later? That was definitely included later. So the dream I had was not a love story in any way and so that was something that I kind of got into as I wrote it and then it just kind of happened yeah um I found it very difficult um early on with readers they would you know

my beta readers would be like people are not going to like that Madeline and Connor are trying to get together and his wife just died yeah I'm like but just read the whole thing yeah so it was hard to write it in a way where he didn't hate them it took it took a lot of work to kind of make it a love story in a thriller that you could root for. Yeah. And then, you know, and then you run the risk of people being frustrated that Madeline and Connor didn't end up together, but they really did. Yeah, they did. So, yeah, it was, it's, and I didn't want to market it as romantic suspense, because if you, you know, start from the get-go and expect a romance, you're really not going

to get it for a long time, and you're not going to maybe root for them. Right. So, it was really tricky to pitch. because of that. Yeah. Yeah, really tricky. But my husband and I both have weird dreams that come true and things like that. So he actually prayed in the 10th grade that he would have a dream that he would see his wife in this dream.

And I was in the dream. We didn't know each other, but we didn't date for four years. Wow. Like four years later, we started dating. and then three years after that we got married. And I've had a lot of dreams about things that end up coming true, dreamed this book. So I wanted it to kind of feel like, you know, I feel like it doesn't matter, you know, where we are. If it's real for Madeline and Connor or Allegra and Connor, it doesn't really matter if she's really still asleep in the dream because he finds her there.

Yeah. And he's going to find her in real life too. Yeah. And there is a point where he said he dreamed about her. her too whenever she wakes up and he said, you know, oh, I dreamed about you too. So it's kind of based off real life and, you know, me and my husband have like this weird thing and I just feel like, you know, we can always find each other. That's so sweet. I love that like all of the dream theme, I guess, I didn't mean to rhyme, but all the dream theme was like so personal to you. That's

really cool. Yeah. Like, in general, that's something that's like important to you or special to you. Right, it is. That's really cool. Very much, very much so. Yeah. But that was also hard to pitch, too. I know whenever I was with my first agent, a lot of people kind of got the sense from skimming that it was like, oh, this is one of those books where it's all a dream at the end. And it's like, readers can get frustrated with that.

Like, I got so invested in the story and it's just all a dream. Right. But it's really not. It's all things that actually happened. So it is a dream, and it continues beyond the dream when she's, when she wakes up. Yes. And all the things actually still happen. All the characters are real.

So it's very, it was a very hard book to pitch. I bet it was. And to describe. Yeah, that was, I have been frustrated before when it turns out that way. But I didn't feel, I feel like that exactly what you said. It didn't feel like it was like a wasted story in terms of like, oh, it was just a dream. It felt like just like a really unique way for someone to be processing something. Right.

And as a writer and as a crazy dreamer, that's exactly what I would do. I feel like that's what I would do. Yeah. I would be like, oh, well, I can just write a story and try to figure this out myself. Yes. That's fascinating. I've been having like way more dreams again in this last week. And so now I'm like thinking very heavily about them again.

Not what they mean. Yes. I am the same way. Like I start just having like if I'm not. addressing something or if I'm just really stressed out about something it typically comes out in my dreams it'll keep showing up yeah until you do you like sleepwalk and sleep talk or do they all like stay in your head for you no they all they all stay in that's good I do that I do sometimes so no at least that got I don't do that yeah yeah so where can people find you to follow you just kind of like

plug whatever you want so they can keep up with all the other books you're going to have coming out, I'm assuming. I am on all the things, except for Snapchat. I'm on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, you name it. Goodreads, book, bub, all of the things. And I usually just get either Audra McElier or Audra McLeer author, because I obviously have a very unique name. Yeah, you do. It's not too hard to find me, but you can always go to my website and I have all the links to everything there.

Awesome. But the only other thing I wanted to say is I'm really depending on the readers to get the word out there for this one. Yeah. Because like I said, it's very hard to describe, very hard to pitch. And so I'm really just depending on readers to be like, read this because, like I said, it's just really hard for me to talk about. Right. And it's like I could take a breath in this interview because we have spoilers. Because I was so nervous if I'm going to say something that totally gives it away.

Right. Right. Yeah. I mean, I saw it because I was seeing even just like other authors share it. I think I saw another reader share it. But I saw it because Kimberly posted about it. So it is like I do love that part of like the book community, whether it's on TikTok or Instagram. Like I've been finding like the more authors I talk to and follow, the more I'm like getting

recommendations from just everyone. So hopefully we can just share it everywhere. All the authors I've met are just so kind and gracious and so helpful. And it's a community unlike any other. I've worked in the corporate world. And, you know, it just wasn't not that way in anywhere, you know, in any job that I've ever had. And like our best advocates as authors are other authors. Yeah.

Because we just really want to lift each other up and encourage each other. and support each other. Yeah. So. Yeah. I liked it. I think I saw it because I saw there were some giveaways too with my darling husband and then secrets of our house.

I love that one too. I just finished that one last week. I got to, I got to beta read for that one in like an early draft. It was so good. Like I literally read yours and then I read hers next. And I think I read like both of them in like four days. Like I was just like staying up at night.

I was like, I can't put either of these down. Yeah, so Kimberly's came out in December, and then Rias came out the 8th, and mine came out the 22nd. And that's just a very good example of, you know, where that could be competitive. We've all just really supported each other. And it doesn't have to be that way, and it's just amazing. Yeah, I do love that. Women writers are the best. Yeah, because it's like you're not, I mean, everybody who likes to read always needs a new book to read,

so you don't need to feel competitive necessarily. Yeah. And then, like, if you give good recommendations, then people are just, like, even more excited that you had good recommendations. So I love that part. So I will put all of those links. We'll be in the show notes so people can go find the book and go find you. They can follow you. And then hopefully we can talk again when another one comes out.

Yeah. Yeah, it's on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. Yeah. And Apple. Sorry, I forgot to mention that. You asked me. And then I went off on something else. Oh, no, that's okay.

But it's on audio, ebook, and paperback. Nice. So you can just Google it. You can find it. Yep, I can definitely find it. But yeah, I'll have all the links there too. And then thanks for chatting with me. Thank you.

Yeah. So nice to talk to you.