Boonta Vista - EPISODE 110: Blast Testing

Episode Date: August 6, 2019

Andrew, Lucy & Theo bring you the latest instalment of MAYORWATCH, solve the dilemma facing private health insurance, review innovative nanna-disposal techniques, and check in with Dr. Lucy. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Merchandise available at: boontavista.com/merchandise *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista iTunes: tinyurl.com/y8d5aenm Spotify: spoti.fi/2DBCXGA Stitcher: www.stitcher.com/s?fid=144888&refid=stpr Pocket Casts: pca.st/SPZB RSS: tinyurl.com/kq84ddb

Welcome to Bntavista episode 110. I'm Andrew and I'm here with Lucy and Theo in the Big Bed from Charlie in the Chocolate Factory. We're in there. I'm on one side, Lucy's in the middle, but we're top and tailing, obviously, like the uncles and aunties or whatever they were, were their grandparents or were they aunties and aunties, right? Must have been. Otherwise, they're fucking freeloaders. They should have been out their jobs like the rest of them.

I feel like you really need Ben's expertise already on this episode. Hmm Miss Challain, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thu, thu, I, I, I, I thu, I thu, I thu, I thu, I'm thu, I'm tho, I'm tho, I'm thu, I'm tho, I'm th, I'm they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they were, they were they were they were they were, they were they were, they were they were, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're than, than, thin, thin, the, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're'm this Charlie in the chocolate package. Mr. Chocolate. Yeah, so because we're all sleepy. We're all sleepy all the time. Sleepy boys and girls. The hair's got his night cap on. It's all folded over. My little candle and a little saucer. Yep. Lucy's wearing a longjohn's. Necta ankle. I would love some longjohns. They look cozy. I feel like Hawaii is going to be too warm for longjohns. Not in Hawaii, absolutely not. Roasting internally over here. Yep, toasting a marshmallow, sweating all the way through your long johns. Just trying to make some kind of point. It's a wet heat. It to make some kind of point it's a wet heat it's certainly a wet heat it's a wet heat it's the humidity what gets you what gets you it's what I've heard

it's what I've heard from many places now does anybody have anything they need to get off their chest before we jump straight in to our first segment? That sounds ominous. Our first segment is an intervention. Oh my God. Where all the chairs range like this, isn't it? They're all the circle pointing inwards.

You want me to stand where on the X right in the middle of the circle? Well, we should get to it then because we have a segment that we haven't done in a long time. Long-time listeners of the show will be familiar with a segment entitled Boat Watch. Now, boat watch was a long-running saga, which involved the mayor of Wichetown, Theo? Logan, to Brisbane South. Mm-hmm. When the mayor of Logan allegedly accepted as a bribe, a large boat, a luxury boat of some kind. And he went through the whole rigmarole of pretending that he didn't and it all ended in prison.

But this has in turn led us to a recurring segment, which I think we need to title, Mayor Watch. Very similar. Very similar theme. It would be hard to pick the difference, but... Just pitch it up a tiny bit. Just speed it up a little. So, and this is where we need to keep our eyes out for just the corrupt mayors of Brisbane, I guess. And Queensland in general.

Which you think would be a once-off thing but it turns out it has not been over the last several years. So I saw this piece about disgraced Ipswich Mayor, shout out to Ipswich. Disgraced Ipswich Mayor, Paul Pisassale? Pisa Salé. Pisa Salé. Got it in one. Certainly it. Smooth.

Smooth. Paul Pissa Saleh fell from a great height. Please, Lucy, go on. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I think we know.'m good, continue. I think we nailed it, probably, probably could move on and... Anytime that Lucy is doing an Italian accent, it needs to be like an 85-year-old noners accent. It's gonna be really soft-spoken, yeah, it's a piece of sound. Oh, hello.

Me's, Mr. Pizza. Your Honor. Uh, when... You fell from a great hide when he instigated a bizarre extortion plot involving a Chinese call girl, her former lover and the suburban lawyer who abused his position as an officer of the court, the judge said yesterday. What? Whom among us has not been involved in a wild extortion plot while also... Yeah, well also being the mayor of a town. Sentencing Pisa Saleh to a year's jail, Judge Brad Farr of the Brisbane District Court told

the 67-year-old that his record of community service and poor health had saved him from spending more time behind bars. Always seems like everybody suddenly falls into poor health when they're about to get sentenced. Doesn't that judge is named Brad? Uh, Brad, Judge Brad. Judge Brad. Judge Tyler, dude. Dude, you messed up. Uh, the judge bangers'ers' gavel gets not cool.

I hate it when the judge harshes my vibe by sentencing me to five to ten years in prison. Oh, Judge Brad. Once celebrated as Queensland's most popular politician, is this true? Oh, Judge Brad. Once celebrated as Queensland's most popular politician, is this true? Who? John Pissala, oh, Paul Pissale. Oh God. I hope not. Well, once celebrated as Queensland's most popular politician.

Wow. He was a shadow of his former abuliant self as he stood ashen faced and silent in the dock between escort Yushan Lee 39 and Solicitor Cameron James McKenzie 37. All three had been convicted of extortion over a bid by Pisazale posing variously as a telemarketer and private investigator to force Lee's former boyfriend to pay her up to $10,000 over their breakup. What? Why were you involved in this? How? There's a series of, what was that TV series that they kept making more of Underworld? The Australian, like, crime series? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Oh, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the th. th. th. th. the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the t. t. tee. tee. tee. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. the the the the the the the the the the the to. the TV series that they kept making more of Underworld? The

Australian like crime series? Underbelly? Underbelly. Yeah and there was like 17 different offshoots and stuff. Yeah they did like one about bikers and people went oh it's pretty cool and because it's Australian TV they went fuck we got to milk this thing. Yeah we got to make about a thousand of these. I feel like they've run off enough of them that maybe they could just do this one for a season. You know, this could be the Australian version of that like the people versus OJ Simpson kind of thing. Just give us just give us the one sentence synopsis again. What's that first line so I can soak in all the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the one. th. the one. the one. t. t. t. t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I t. I'm. I'm. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. t. t. What's that first line so I can soak in all the details? Was it the he instigated a bizarre extortion plot involving a Chinese call girl, her former lover and the suburban lawyer who abused his position as an officer of the court. That is just an Elmore Leonard storyline. Yeah. That's all that is.

Because of your high political profile this case has generated much media publicity. Leonard storyline. Yeah. That's all that is. Because of your high political profile, this case has generated much media publicity, George Brad said. Sentencing Pizzazzale to two years in jail, suspended after 12 months. Hence, your fall from grace has been from a great height and very public. That public shame is a matter of some limited relevance in the determination of appropriate sentence. Dude. Lee, who followed the proceedings through a Mandarin-speaking court interpreter and interrupted

the judge to say she had not meant to extort anybody. Got 15 months jail time. Why does she get more? He did the... Hmm. Suspended after seven months while McKenzie will serve half of an 18-month prison sentence. But for the unlucky coincidence for the trio that Queensland's crime and corruption commission had been tapping Pizazale's phone, Judge Brad said the extortion might never have come to light. Oh, yeah, okay, I think we've got to the extortion might never have come to light.

Oh, yeah, okay, I think we've got to the bottom of it now. It started when Pisa Ali had sex with Lee. Ah, ha. Ah, ha. He had sex with her after they were introduced by a barrister, a friend of his, and she complained about her treatment at the hands of her ex-lover, Sydney taxi driver, Jin Lee. Agreeved that she had traveled to Australia from Singapore for him, only to discover he was married, Yushan Lee wanted the man punished. Judge Brad said that Yushan Lee failed to tell Pizazale that she too was married when she poured her heart out to him. What? You bunch of shady motherfuckers. This is some reality TV shit. They don't tell you at any point whether or not Pizazale himself

was was married or had formally been married. So I'm not I'm not sure about that one. Because it, this, I'm going to be honest with you. It's, this seems like the kind of thing that your wife would leave you ever. He sounds divorced. I'm getting divorced vibes. Yeah, getting some family court dad vibes. That's right. His Wikipedia has been updated to say convicted extortionist.

So this is what he did. The then mayor almost incomprehensibly phoned Mr. Lee in January 2017 pretending that he was conducting a health survey to confirm some details she had provided. Later he called back posing as a private investigator to threaten Mr. Lee with a $200,000 lawsuit or exposure of the affair to his wife unless he paid $10,000. Now, does the article mention whether or not he was putting on different voices each time? Were their accents involved? Was one high-pitched? Mm-hmm. A little, little comb over his notes with a little piece of paper. Was there a racist accent involved?

Oh, well. If there was, can we hear it? Oh, beautiful. Judge Farr also said that Pisa Zalea persisted even though he knew you should have no entitlement to the money. She had flown to Australia on her own volition after Mr. Lee ended their relationship. Come on, man. Oh boy.

After they've already split up, she's like, I'm going to fly to another country and make this work. In an act of breathtaking hypocrisy, says Judge Brad. Pissasale even accused the man of blackmailing her. Ah, it's a classic bit, isn't that? Classic. Turnabout is fair play. I think we can all agree. That's what that expression means, right?

It's the first time I've ever heard. Really? Turnabout is fair play? You've never heard that one. You're making that up. Is that a gross thing, Andrew? Like, th a grass tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha thi tha. It a grossed. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thoom. thoom. thu. thoom. that's that's that that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. that one. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. too. too. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. It. It's. like is that a gross thing Andrew like there's grass on the field let's play like a disgusting thing? I don't know why you took it there it's much more along the lines of what's good for the goose is good to the candor. It could be anything because this is literally the first time I'm hearing and I don't think it's a real saying. I think you've invented this idiom. Goodness.

This proverb, if you will. Turnabout is fair play. Yes, which according to wictionary, it's a proverb, meaning it is allowable to retaliate against an enemy's dirty tricks by using the same ones against them. All right, anyone can write a Wikipedia entry. This is a wild series of accusations here. I will not be extorted into admitting that I made up a centuries-old proverb. That classic saying we've all been, I mean I was just saying it

to Katelynettler to his fair play and she kind of nodded her head in recognition. It's repeated it back at me she said, turn about it is whatever it is so we'll love to hear it. Right into the show at hey you guys at Punta Vista.com please let us know if you a normal person with a regular brain have ever heard the expression, turn about his fair play. Oh, while we're talking about normal stuff, is it normal to eat raw corn? Yeah, that makes it. It's like a drag for it this afternoon? Okay. That's delicious. It's refreshing. Like on the cob? No, yeah on the co-oh... Oh, you've been in America too long, Lucy. I'm confining.

They're both good. Corn comes from a cob. Oh, you mean like that corn that grows in a can? That's you, Lisa. That's you, Lisa. Yeah, it's delicious. Of course you can. It's so good.

I'll give it to you that that uncooked corn off the cob is the most refreshing way to my corn. It's so good. Corn is just a top tea of food. It's right up there isn't it? I want to make watching a lot of Korean YouTube cooking videos as one does. As one does. And this person was making a rice dish where they like got a corncob and then they cut all the corn off and they put that in a dish with rice in it and covered it with water and then they like rested the whole corn husk like the whole cob itself in the water and they did like absorption method rice But with the whole corn cob in there. Oh, that sounds good as hell. And it would have I think it would have had a very nice

Corny taste to that rice and corn and I want to try that. Hmm. Oh, that's good stuff. I also highly recommend if you're into corn trying Korean corn tea if you're into corn trying Korean corn tea. It's god damn delicious. Just the taste of hot corn. It's what we all love. Hmm. Now Andrew I actually I looked it up just to just to double check I thought I was going crazy because I thought surely surely it's not possible for both the Ipswich and the Logan councils to both be sacked and for the Logan mayor to also be charged as well as the Ipswich Mayor. These are all relatively normal, two relatively normal cities within like stone's row of where I am. But no, it actually happened. The entire, the, um, the city council of I the, um, throw of where I am. But no, it

actually happened. The entire, the City Council of Ipswich was fired last year which I think we talked about on the show perhaps in a, so 15 people were charged by the Crime and Corruption Commission, including two former mayors with a total of 86 criminal offences, including fraud, corruption and extortion. And then in 2019 the Logan City Council was sacked also by the Crime and Corruption Commission. And so it sounds like Brisbane is basically beset on all sides by criminals. No criminals in Brisbane though. it's a

good place and requires no further investigation obviously. Well did you know that the person who was the mayor before that in Ipswich, Andrew and Tony Oli is also a fraudster who appeared in Ipswich Magistrates Club. Absolutely. Apparently that's just the... Oh yeah, so he's the second former Ipswich Mayor to be jailed for dishonesty offenses in several weeks. I love that Ipswich Mayors are just one consistent line of guys to say and like,

I gotta be loyal to my Capo and then like being immediately thrown in jail. That's how the term ends traditionally. There's no term limit you're just in as long as he stay out of jail. Yeah you just end until you get done. All right so back to Pisa Saleh. He then ramped up the pressure by enlisting McKenzie, this is the lawyer, that we recall before, to send a letter of demand to Jin Lee for $8,400. Judge Brad says, dude, it seems to me you simply acted as requested to enable Pisa Ali's demand to take on the error of legitimacy. God.

Yikes. In jailing the solicitor. I suspect you paid precious little thought of what you were doing. Uh, imagine the whole trial. It's what all courts in California are like. We can only assume. Oh yeah, the judge said that he did not accept that Pisa's Ali had been motivated by a quote misguided sense of justice to help the call girl. I hate when I'm spurred on by a misguided sense of justice.

I like that the dude has just tried to make himself sound like, you know, the cop from justified or something. He's like, he plays by his own rules but he gets it done try to make himself sound like shaft out there slapping a pimp you know but no we do have a follow-up to this story which is the jailed Paul Pizzaale has been taken to hospital now you may think to yourself what happened did he did he get like beaten too savagely on his initiation into the gang of convicted mayors of Ipswich when he arrived at jail?

It's hard to get into that gang man. Oh my goodness. But no, disgraced ex-Ipswich Mayor Paul Piecesale is off to a rough start behind bars after breaking his collarbone. Pizzarle 67 who was sentenced to two years jail on Thursday for extortion was taken by ambulance from Walson Correctional Center on Sunday morning. He was treated at the Princess Alexandra Hospital. He was attempting to do a chin up. Oh, that's that's tr-tempting to do a chin up. Oh, that's... that is... that's... that's true. That's traumatic. I'm... tried to do one chin up and immediately broke his gullibone. I feel sorry for this guy now. That is... I mean I could do a chin up but this guy's probably got it rough. So RIP, to deceased convicted former Mayor of Upswitch, Paul Pisa Sale. Oh dear, oh dear.

Oh, dear. Speaking of pieces of shit. Hmm. Huh. So many of them out there in the world today. We like to talk about them on this show. Could be. But we have a very specific one in the about them on this show. Could be, could be. But we have a very

specific one in the news today. Now we've seen a lot of talk about like a medic-efferol coming out of the states, what with the Democratic primary leading up to the 2020 election. You watched, you watched the debates? I did. I've been watching the debates. You've been doing a bit of self-punishment there. It's so good. They just make a year-long spectacle out of this. It's just incredible. It's so weird.

It's incredibly weird. I love that they also always have to include a couple of guys that clearly they're just to be dunked on. Yeah, they're huge egg heads. They're horrible. Soft faces, just miserable up there. All the guys who are somehow on stage despite like polling at 0%. They're there for the entertainment. It's incredible. I love that John Delaney was just a guy that no one had heard of with hundreds of millions of dollars until he decided to get up on the stage and have his head just fucking dunked through a hoop like over and over again by every single person on that stage. Wonderful. It is beautiful stuff. Who's your

favorite Lucy? My actual favorite? Oh give us your actual favorite and your ironic favorite. Oh, what's the guy's name? He looks like Huckleberry Hound. Who's that Delaney? John Delaney, the guy looks like... No, there's another guy. He has a really sad cartoon voice. Oh boy. Sad cartoon voice. Democratic can do. Normal Google search term right there. voice democratic Normal Google search term right then Put that into duck duck go see what roll the dice you know it actually it hasn't given me the answer that came up with Beto which is that's not correct no

There is a bit of a sad character though at this point. He's he's not doing so good hmm so um so you know they're all talking about Medicare for all and it's very at this point? He's not doing so good. Hmm. So, you know, they're all talking about Medicare for all, and it's very interesting to see like all of the shit that comes out of people of the debates when they're saying things like, hey, don't you dare try and break people's precious, deeply personal relationships with their insurance companies,

who they love and treasure. This is a really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really th, like like they they they th, like who they love and treasure. Yeah this is a really like strong argument that they're having is about whether Americans want to keep their shitty insurance. Whether people like having to deal with the insurance company? They like it. And the obvious, the obvious like semantics that are a play here is that when people say we will have Medicare for all and we'll have a single payer system, like in Australia, like with Medicare, where you just, you go to the hospital or you go to a bulk billing GP and at the end they say, thank you, you can leave now because you don't have to have private health insurance. And people take that as saying, okay, so because you don't have to have private health insurance

anymore, your health insurance is being taken away from you and they're putting it to people in terms that make it sound like you will be left without any form of like medical cover for anything. Extremely disingenuous argument and way of putting it and all that sort of stuff. And it makes you say, hey, we got a pretty nice deal here in Australia. You can go to a doctor and get helped out and they say, go and buy your $10 medicine or whatever. Obviously things could be a lot better for some people when it comes to things like you know Medicare not covering dentistry and like more more serious mental health treatment and that sort of stuff but

if you want to compare it with like the states or whatever we're doing we have a baseline of being alive and staying alive which is you know which is reasonably nice is reasonably nice. You know, you don't want to, I guess you don't want to exclude, you know, situations in rural Queensland and, you know, those sorts of things, which you know, obviously we could be doing a lot, a lot better, but there is, you know, at least some baseline for most people in Australia. Yeah, so wait though. You're telling me that it looks pretty good. But what if someone could come up with an even better solution to our whole issue with having Medicare and it being good? What if someone could fix that

problem? What if someone can finally sort that out for us? So we take here this article, I think it was from the ABC, who knows? The head of one of Australia's biggest health insurers, have you read this article Lucy? Oh-uh. And what a head I might say? Please please enjoy this article, Lucy? Mm-mm-mm. Oh-ho-oh. And what a head, I might say. Please, please enjoy this, then. The head of one of Australia's biggest health insurers has called on the government to abolish Medicare and make private health insurance compulsory,

with the government paying the premiums of those unable to meet the costs themselves. What a grift. paying the premiums of those unable to meet the costs themselves. What a grift. What a great idea. And it's not self-motivated in any way. It's like, hey, I noticed that you guys are just paying the providers directly and where do we get on in this action? I'm not seeing any money over here.

Where's my kickback? Hey, hey. In a radical solution to the growing crisis facing private health funds, Mark Fitzgibbon, managing director of NIB said his proposal would protect the most vulnerable while allowing the private sector to flourish without competition from Medicare, which he called a government monopoly. That's a wild take on Medicare. How dare you monopolize taking care of people without charging them tens of thousands of dollars for the privilege? Yeah.

Now, Lucy, you might be thinking of yourself, Fitzgibbon. That name sounds kind of familiar for a high-profile Australian individual? It does. It does. It does. It does. thinking of yourself, Fitzgibbon. That name sounds kind of familiar for a high-profile Australian individual. It turns out that Mark Fitzgibbon is the brother of Joel Fitzgibbon, an Australian politician and Labour Party member of the House of Reps. Remember how Joel Fitzgibbon used to be the defense minister? And then he had to resign in disgrace from being the defense minister for some reason? Oh, it's that guy.

Well, how about this? From December 2007 to June 2009, Joel Fitzgiven was the Minister for Defense in the first Rudd ministry. He resigned from Cabinet in June 2009 following a series of controversies. Mr. Fitzgiven resigned his defense portfolio after revelations that an army general was instructed to attend meetings with the minister's brother, Mark Fitzgibbon, the head of Health Fund NIB at which defense health contracting was discussed. Fitzgibbon admitted that he had breached the ministerial code of conduct and resigned.

Of course he didn't have to actually quit the party or resign a seat or anything. Yeah, he just got bumped out of his ministry, as is the way with Australian political parties because they suck shit. So coming back to what Mark Fitzgiven would like to see happen with this horrible system that we have that really has its boot to the neck of us, all of us, heads of major private insurance health funds in this country. He says, the little guys, that just the little guys, the little guys out there running the biggest health fund in the country. He says, the little guys. That's just the little guys. The little guys out there running the biggest health fund in the country, which we're all doing in our own

way. He says, a sensible policy approach would be to make a sensible policy approach would be to make private health insurance compulsory for all Australians with taxation devoted to subsidizing the premiums for those who would otherwise be left behind. That is, high income earners would at one end of the scale pay the entire premium, while at the other, those with low income would be fully subsidized, Mr. Fitzgiven writes in an op-ed in the Australian Financial Review. My eyes just flash, my life's just flashing before my eyes, kind of disassociating with that sentence.

What if we had some sort of system where everybody put into a big bucket and if you earn more, you put it more in and those that didn't earn so much they put less in and then we pay for their health care. What if such a system never thought of before presented here as an original idea existed? Sounds like communism. No, no, but see, communism is when you've got two layers, and that's the health care providers on the bottom and the government on the top. Whereas what he's proposing is a very robust capitalist three-layer system. We've got the government on top and the health care providers on the bottom and then in between, in between the value makers.

They're just the guys that are making the economy work and their job is to pass money from the top to the bottom. God bless them. And look they work so hard. They do such a good job. Why don't they deserve just a little bit, you know, if they take, if they take 10 crumbs from the top, maybe they pass only 7 down. Don't they deserve 3 crumbs? Don't they deserve most of the crumbs? Don't they deserve most of the crumbs? Don't they deserve 100% of the crumbs from wealthy Australians? Mm-hmm. And also 100% of the crumbs from poor-income-tick-in, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they, if they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they ta ta ta ta ta ta ta take take take take take ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta they they they they they t deserve 100% of the crumbs from wealthy Australians? And also 100% of the crumbs from poor-income Australia. So I feel like this analogy breaks down because if you look at this dude's fur day, he's never eaten in his life, apart from perhaps oil.

Now if you are a long-time listener of the show, you will remember us talking about former... Oh no, wait, is Malcolm Roberts a senator again? No, he's not... I believe he is? I feel like he is. I was gonna say former senator but... Former again senator. God damn it. On again off again, Senator. On again, off again, Senator. So, yeah, you may remember us talking about him and his face. And him having that particular look of like, um, someone who's been isolated on a desert planet in out of space and has slowly

had his mind erased by endless rays from the sun his viruses bleached to a pale pale blue. That's exactly the face of this Mark Fitzgiven guy has. Yep but he will greet you with a smile. Hmm. As he reaches out his hand which goes straight past your outstretched hand and into your pocket for some reason. So, uh, so Mark continues. He claims that this would address an impending affordability crisis springing from the aging of the population as the number of people working, as the number of people of working taxpaying

age falls in proportion to the number of aging and increasingly sick retirees. Now I notice that he doesn't specify what the issue, like what the affordability crisis actually is, whether it's about the country being able to afford to take care of people, or whether the affordability crisis is the crisis of people being unable to afford increasingly expensive private health insurance premiums. Because they seem like they need to be treated with different levels of urgency, just from my point of view. Mr. Fitzgivens potentially divisive suggestion, potentially, you know everybody out there who's

like, I fucking hate Medicare. I hate it when I break my leg and go to hospital and they just take care of me and I leave. Yeah, I hate it when I go into the doctor's office and they're like, oh, we bulk build that for you, so I go, no, you fucking take that back. You charge me. Hey, hey, hey, the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th the. to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to preferably so no tax goes to the government. Hate it when I have two children and the whole experience is fine and I don't have to pay a cent.

It's the worst. It sucks. So his potentially divisive suggestion comes on the heels of a report from Think Tank, the Grattan Institute, published last week, which described the private health insurance industry as being in a, quote, death spiral. As younger people, oh no, as younger people abandoned the increasingly expensive private market. Between December 2016 and December 2018, the report found the number of 20 to 29 year olds with hospital cover had fallen by 8%.

Quote, governments have failed to clearly define the role of private health insurance since Medicare was introduced in the 1980s. The upshot is we have a muddled health care system that is riddled with inconsistencies and perverse incentives, the report co-authored by former Health Department Secretary Stephen Duckett said. The Grattan Institute argued that the government had two options to either abandon inequitable subsidies such as the 30% premium rebate entirely or subsidize the private sector as a genuine alternative to Medicare. While not explicitly taking a position, the report's arguments were weighted towards abolishing government

subsidies, oddly enough. Yeah, it's almost like this is another one of these industries that is only able to survive because they just lobby right-wing governments to completely subsidize their way of life. Hmm. That's communism. So, um, we'll interject here just to read the room because around the time this article is happening, journalist from, what was you from, New Daly, Samantha Maiden, just tweeted, um, my private health rant, at what point do we admit that this is an insane scam?

I'm happy to pay more tax or for private health insurance if it's worth it, but the current system is a joke. Does anybody have good experiences with private health? Please reply below. And it's pretty safe to say that the replies are almost exclusively people saying, private health in Australia is a great big load of shit. Hmm, it sure is. Gabriel Jackson from the Guardian says, Nobody has a good experience of private health. The more you pay for it, the more you have to fork out every time you use it.

It's a massive scam, more so than any other country's private health insurance. We should scrap it immediately. There's a reason that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha thiia thia their is a thia thia their thoomea their their their their their their their their their their is is is is is is is is is their is is their is is is is their is their is their is their is a their is a their is a should scrap it immediately. There's a reason that insurance company Booper makes half of its worldwide profits in Australia. Hold it moment. Hmm. Aaron Turner says, good, and good is in scare-quoids, good experience here in the treatment for my endometriosis

took 12 plus months in the public system, just a few weeks in private, but with some impressive out-of-pocket costs. For me, being out of the private health insurance system is as unappealing as being in it. So this is like one of the only good reviews is for someone to say this thing that is not, you know, this sort of edge case that is not properly funded by the public system............. I, I, I, I, I, I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the, the, the. the. the, thrown, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th.. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thr. And, thr. And, thr. And, thri. And, toge. And, te. And, thri. And, thr-a. And, thr-a. And, thr-a. And, the. And, this sort of edge case that is not properly funded by the public system. I could only get it treated in a reasonable amount of time through the private health insurance system, but I had to pay private health insurance premiums all year and then I had to pay excess and then I also had to pay tons of out-of-pocket costs myself. Just to get seen to. So again, that's not actually an argument for having

private health insurance, it's an argument for stopping subsidizing the industry and just putting that money into Medicare where it actually belongs. Yeah, absolutely. You can't just point at like a hole that we've allowed to develop and fall through to the public health system and go, look, see, the public health system is failing because we made that hole in the first place, right? We chose to treat stuff like endometriosis and dental cover especially as something that's not as important as something you might show up to the ER in. And imagine if you took all that money that you're paying just filtering up to the ER in. And imagine if you took all that money that you're paying just filtering through the private health

industry and use that to beef up cover for everybody so that you're not left with this weird, you know, Sophie's choice of do I throw away all of my money to see whether it actually gets covered in the first place or not you know assuming that I can get seen earlier. all my money to see whether it actually gets covered in the first place or not, you know, assuming that I can get seen earlier. I mean, it's just a, it's not a good or clear system to anybody I don't feel like. And I ended up like, I know that the anecdotal stuff is not data, but I went into private health insurance to get my teeth done, right, Because I've got, well I had wisdom teeth

that go at like 90 degrees. If you want to get through that done through the public health system, you're waiting a very long time. So I rang up the fucking scamsters at, so I direct, what's that? They had that big advertising campaign, and they'd be like, put you on to the right right health insurance. So I select I select and they're like yes this is the health insurance you need for your teeth. I went with them for a whole year and

I got to the end of it and they're like yep great we'll book you in. Get your shit done. I had like four wisdoms come out I I had like, you know, jawbone taken away. Not a great time. And I get out and I'm like, cool. I'd like my money back now, please. And they said, uh, no. All right. Cool. How much of it did they cover you for? So they paid for the hospital bed, which was like 500 bucks. Which, you know, again, we should be fortunate that we have a private system that competes with the public, sorry, a public system that competes with the private system because, you know,

$500 for a hospital bed is not very much at all, and that is because we have, you know, hospital beds in the public system. But they paid that that that that $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00.00. thi. thi. that that that that that that that that that that that that that thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. the. the. thea. the. the. thea. thi. thi. thi. th system. But they paid that $500 and not a cent for the surgery because wisdom tooth extraction is minor dental. What? I'm thinking. So, you know, if anyone has private health insurance in Australia, you know minor dental, they give you enough to go to the dentist twice a year, which is about $200 or something like that. Yeah, it's not. And I was like, well, you've got to be kidding me and they said, no, we're not. And I didn't get my money back. I was out of pocket like two grand.

Love it. Love it. Love it. Love private health. It's so good. Well I'm looking at a few more of these stories here. Edwina Bartholomew says I didn't realize that I had to upgrade my private health insurance 12 full months before even getting pregnant. So I'm giving birth in a public hospital. Obstitution told me it makes absolutely no difference. I've been a private customer my entire life and they wouldn't budge Angie Adamson here says No after gaps of $3,500 over two surgeries where they paid about $800 of the peas I pissed it off the final straw I thought I thought I was saving Medicare by going private, but no, they claim your Medicare benefits for you.

It's a good system. It seems to be working. So they're even taking money out of the public system to do that, so even if you think to yourself. And that's the argument that a lot of people make. Like, that was the argument when some of these subsidies were born in under John Howard was always like well you know if you're if you're of an adult age and you are of the means to be able to afford public health insurance you should pay it because like people people like to kind of position it as this thing

of you're doing the right thing as a citizen as a member of the public by paying for private health insurance because you're taking the burden off the public system. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. And, the the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, the. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. member of the public by paying for private health insurance because you're taking the burden off the public system. But you're not actually doing that because private health insurance companies make a claim on your behalf to Medicare anyway, max out the amount of money that they can get out of that and then charge you money on top of it. Whereas if you had of just gone to hospital. And like you were saying about dental surgery and stuff, Theo, like I've never had private health insurance,

because I've always been like, well, when I've needed to go to hospital, I've gone to hospital and it's been fine. And you know, every 10 years when one of my teeth just falls out I go to the dentist and I get a couple of rounds stuff done and they charge me you know whatever 300 400 bucks a trip to do you know fairly major stuff and I have to do that a couple of times but all of that is still less than paying insurance premiums oh yeah yeah yeah for sure so So like across across my life where I haven't paid for private health insurance for like 25 years, like yeah, all of that time I could have been spending money into fucking private health insurance

to get nothing back out of it. Yeah. And the thing is like my, my dentists is always fond of telling me that, you know, health insurance companies exist to make money, right? So they are, they operate on the concept that if you pay in, you know, a hundred bucks, then they should only pay out 90, right? And in other countries, you know, maybe America's probably a better thing to talk about, but like, they exist as a risk pool, where you're in this huge risk pool, right? And so if you get totally fucked up, then you, you know, you'll come out ahead. But that's not the way that it operates so much in Australia, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, fucked up, then you, you know, you'll come out ahead.

But that's not the way that it operates so much in Australia, where we push off a lot of the voluntary stuff, a lot of the stuff that can wait. You know, that people love to talk about knee surgery for some fucking reason. And knee surgery is like the like the example, right? Because it takes you a very long time to get seen in the public system, but you don't need to get your knee looked at, right? So that's, so as far as a risk pool goes, the risks are already diffuse because the public sector operates the emergency rooms, right? The public, so if you, you won't go into an ER in Australia and the public sector operates the emergency rooms, right? The public, so if you, you won't go into an ER in Australia and come out with a hundred thousand dollar bill, right?

Like, you know, as we've talked about several times in the show, we've all got, you know, experiences of going in, you know, I've had, you know, being so horribly sick that I have to go into hospital and they keep me overnight and then at the end you walk out. And so the reason, the whole reason for being in a risk pool diminishes drastically and especially because we provide services for the elderly as far as, you know, those things that we've been talking about that haven't been covered so well, you know, we provide dental services for the elderly in the public system and they're quite good and those are the kind of risk pools that they talk about in America and in Australia just doesn't exist because

we again we take care of we mostly you know take care of that of that baseline so what's the point? Imagine how many votes Labour would have got if they'd said we're expanding Medicare to include dental. It's such a simple thing. It's such a simple thing and it's like it's such a weird thing to say well some people can go without dental or like someone joked about on Twitter you know the government kind of looks at teeth like luxury bones that are optional. But it's like the one thing that you can look at and say, well if you don't go to the

dentist today, it's going to be more fucked up tomorrow. Yeah. Right. So it just pushes off and it makes the cost go up, right? The cost of getting a scale, a scale and clean at six months versus getting a filling at a year versus getting a root canal at two years because you haven't been to the dentist because you can't afford private health insurance, it's just increasing the amount of money

that we flush down the drain as a society. And if you just covered it at a reasonable level in the public system for you know everybody then we wouldn't have that issue and we would come out ahead you know fuck at the economy as far as like the amount of dollars going in it's just wasted money but that's an incentive in the private model right like in the private model you want to spend as much money as you, or you want to get as much money from people doing diagnostics that don't need to be done, work that doesn't need to be done necessarily.

Because those are the things that generate you more, more money, right? And MRI is a money printing machine. And all of those, it's all just lost productivity. It's all just sapped from the economy and fed to places that it doesn't need to be. So to compare, as is quite often the case, the costs of doing health care and the private industry versus the costs of doing it without a profit motive is just totally pointless, right? Because things become so much cheaper in medical cover specifically when there is no profit motive. Well, hold on. What if we hear Mr. Fitzgibbon out?

Please. Do we have to? Well, he's about to make the whole thing make sense. Here we go. Mr. Fitzgibbon said that abandoning subsidies would immediately add 30% to the cost of insurance premiums, which is the amount currently met by the government's health insurance rebate at a cost of $6 billion a year, leading to an exodus from private health funds and rocketing Medicare costs. Well, if only we had about six billion dollars to pay for that. Weird.

Naturally, that would hurt the sector, he said, but the other big consequences all these people would fall back on the public system, which again we might consider using our own money to pay for. Instead of using all these taxpayer dollars just to prop up your fucking insurance premiums. Mr. Fitzgibbon put the cost of abolishing the rebate to Medicare at around $15 billion, though he did not say how he arrived at that figure. While, now this is the bit that gets me. While Mr. Fitzgibbon, um, I keep feeling like doing the stupid resistance Twitter insult Mr. Shitzgibbon, put the cost of abolishing the rebate to, oh wait, we already said that.

While Mr. Fitzgibbon accepted his proposal would be politically divisive, he rejected the suggestion that the life and death nature of health care was an argument against privatization. Hmm. Life and death nature of health care. Amazing. Rejected the suggestion that the life and death of health care was an argument against privatization.

Quote, I don't know why health insurance is any more life and death than the food we eat and the homes we live in, and we don't make that a government monopoly, he told the financial review in a separate interview. I love whatever you call this. Oh, he's so close. It's just circling, circling around the point that it's almost like we have government housing and we have a social safety net for if you can't afford food? Hmm. It's almost like those things should be better funded than they are? In this proposal, people still get health care. It's just that rather doing it through a social government-run insurance system, they do it through a private system, so health care doesn't disappear,

he said. Yeah, I'm sure that once, I'm sure that once like the government is no longer funding Medicare and it's 100% private insurance that the government is paying for, I'm sure that the premiums will just stabilize and stay at a nice healthy price point. So once they have it 100% captive market. They'll go down as is classically the case I think. He denied that his radical proposal was evidence of an industry in a death spiral, insisting that under current rules his business was doing well. Yeah the current rules are the get 30% of your

shit subsidized. So great big death spiral. And of course, all of this came up again in an article a little later in the week. Baby's brain tumor highlights nightmare experience with private health insurance. From the ABC, Kylie Katerick's son Josh was just four and a half months old when she realized something was wrong and took him to hospital. It turned out he'd been born with a brain tumor, she told 730. Within 12 hours of taking him up to the hospital he was in critical condition. The catarix had private health insurance with NIB and thought that the cost of treatment was

something that would not have to worry about. They were a nightmare, Ms. Caterricks said. We didn't thoic th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thiol- thiol-a. thiol-a. thiol-a, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. told. thoom-a, th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. t. t. t. toge. toge. toge. toge. toge. toe. toe.e.e.a.a.e.a.a.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e. t.e. t. Katerik said. We didn't go private when Josh was first transferred to Randwick Children's Hospital, we just went through the public system. But when he transferred back to Canber Hospital, we tried to go private in a public hospital, and they denied our claims straight up. They found that their mid-level hospital cover would not be enough. We hadn't specified neurosurgery on our policy, Ms. Katerikterikikik-s th-oicicicicicicicicic, I. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th out. th, th out. th out. tho, tho, th out. th, th, th, th out. th, th out. th out. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out. th out out. th out th out th out tho, tho, tho, tho' out theou. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that policy, Ms. Katerik said. I mean, who thinks about neurosurgery for a four-month-old? Mark Fitzgiven is the managing director of Ms. Katerik's whole health insurer, NIB, the fourth largest health insurer in the country. He said the people are looking at health insurance the wrong way. It's not there as a savings plan, he told 730. You shouldn't be

thinking about how much I put in versus how much I get out. It's literally what it's for, you fucking idiot. Just this whole idea of like, my God. It's there to protect you in the event of misadventure or serious disease or accident. We exist to pay claims, he says. Sounds like you don't pay this claim. In this article of a series of articles of people saying, I pay thousands and thousands of dollars a year for private health insurance and they don't fucking pay for anything. Hate it when I forgot to the neurosurgery to the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their disease their disease their disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease disease to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their disease. their disease. their disease. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the of dollars a year for private health insurance and they don't fucking pay for anything. Hate it when I forgot to tick the neurosurgery box on my extras cover, you know?

I hate it when I get insurance for my child and I don't tick the thing that is killing my baby box. Should have ticked the box. Should have ticked it. Huge prick. A piece of shit. And of course they allude the the th th they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th the the the the the theateateateateate. I thick thicked thicked the. I tho- tho- tho- thi. I thicked thicked thicked thicked thicked th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. I the. I the the the the the took took took tick tick tick tick tick the the the tick the the theateateateateate. I the. Giant piece of shit. And of course they allude to the article we were just talking about. He recently proposed a radical shake-up for the way health is funded, arguing Australia would be better off if universal Medicare was replaced with compulsory private health insurance. My idea is, said the huge dickhead, I should be able to opt out of Medicare, take the pressure

off the public system. But you're saying there should be no public system, not take the fucking pressure off it. Take the pressure off the public system and taxation as a funding mechanism and take care of my own lifetime health care costs. I believe I should have that option, he said. We love options, don't we? We love options. We love the option to not get our babies neurosurgery paid for. I love it. I love just complicated forms, just going through like, will my baby die of this? Hmm. I better make an informed choice as a giant knucklehead who knows nothing about medicine because that's not my fucking job.

I like having the best of both worlds which is getting to pay for health insurance but also not having it cover my baby's neurosurgery. It's ideal and also the hospital costs as well. It's just ideal I think if you want to sign up for a hospital cover but don't want your hospital care to be covered maybe check out NIB insurance guys that's the Buntor seal of approval. Lucy do you have a funny joke for what the acronym NIB stands for. Anything? Trying to think of a gag here.

Uh, non-insuring butt heads. Am I right? Not bad. Yeah. Good work everybody. Good job. If you are in the situation of requiring health insurance, a thing that is not very well advertised is that the government provides services for which you can go online, you can just Google government health insurance comparison,

and they will actually show you year on year which insurers pay out the most per dollar spent on there and they will do a complete comprehensive kind of comparison on there. Don't pay or don't the selection guys don't get paid by you but obviously they're taking from the premiums of the place that you're signing up for, don't give money to those parasites. Just go on look at it yourself, you can find it online. And so we cross now to a story of medical research with a happy ending. That's one way to put it. In an article here on 7 News titled, Woman's Body, sold by Research Group to U.S. Army to use for, quote, blast training.

Don't laugh. It's not funny what happened to somebody's... It's not funny. Somebody's noner. It's not funny. I can't deal with this one. The son of an elderly woman whose body was donated for scientific study was mortified to find out. It was allegedly used for, quote, blast training by the US Army. It's not funny.

Doctors wanted to study the great grandmother's brain to find out how the Alzheimer's gene may have mutated. To which her son Jim consented and donated her body to the biological research setup. Two days later he claimed to have received a wooden box with a quote, majority of her ashes. And no explanation of what kind of study she would undergo. He says he learned years later what happened to his mother when Reuters exposed the company for allegedly selling a number of the bodies to the US army

for testing explosives and their impact on a human body. I feel foolish, he said. You didn't tick the box. You didn't take their impact on a human body. I feel foolish, he said. You didn't tick the box. You didn't tick the don't explode my non-a-box. Don't explode my grandma. He says she was supposedly strapped in a chair on some sort of apparatus and a detonation took place underneath her to basically

kind of get an idea of what the human body goes through when a vehicle is hit by an IED. Oh, it's disgust. This is the... This is the... It's not funny. It's not funny. This is... You remember the grandma that they were rescuing by helicopter spinning around? That video killed me.

And yeah, she finally safely recovered from that and died of natural causes and then this happened to her. This is my, this is my feeling. Oh my goodness. My goodness. Oh, like, as soon as they talk about the big strap to a chair and a thing going off underneath, I immediately get like, in my head the image of like the myth busters, slow motion video. You can't avoid it, can't, you can't help but think of it.

I will point out, sorry, Andrew, that the CEO of the Biological Resource Center is named Stephen Gore. Mr. Gore. Mr. Gore or Dr. Gore? Oh, Stephen to his friends. Oh my God. Oh. I don't read all those Wikipedia articles about the times that they try and blow up Wales. Oh, dear.

Calm myself down. Now, just to really put a capper on the medical through line here, just before we wrap it up, Lucy, do you have time for a quick installation of Paging Dr. Lucy. I... Sure. Play that theme, baby. Good to know. You're okay, Theo? It's not funny. It's not funny. It's not funny. You shouldn't be laughing.

Oh my God. Okay. Now, we've got one here. Relationship advice. We want a serious answer to this, Lucy. Moving on from the serious grandma blasting. The also serious things we've been talking about. 26-year-old female, my 30-year-old boyfriend is a wealthy, well-educated, completely normal man. Mm-hmm.

We've been dating for eight months. Comes from a wealthy family, private school, Ivy League, Ivy Law School. He works for a bank right now. He got very high a few nights ago and told me a very long story about how when he was in boarding school in Switzerland, age 16 or 17 he met a man that was 400 years old. He wasn't telling a joke. He wasn't telling a joke. He wasn't trying to be funny. He sounded scared telling me and said he has never told anyone before. I'm not even joking like he was almost in tears telling this story as if he was admitting

to murdering his mother. Oh my god. The next day, he was completely normal and I don't even know if he remembers telling me. He's a completely normal guy and honestly he's never mentioned being into vampires. He doesn't really even watch movies. Should I bring this up with him sober? It's been a few days and I feel awkward about it. Or should I just forget all about it?

So my boyfriend confessed that he met a vampire. Well, he was very high. Should I ask him about it when we're sober? Wow. You just assuming that it's a vampire? Did he say it was a vampire? It sounds like she's saying, but that he thinks he met an immortal Nosferatu of a man. How could you just let this go? Oh I couldn't. Like, because he's the thing... I would wake him up the next day and be like, all right. More details, let's go, get it going.

I'm showing you pictures of vampires from different movies to see which one he was most like. Does he look more like this guy? So you absolutely would not let it go? Oh definitely not. I don't even think that's grounds for a breakup. Like you have to stay together now. You need to get to the bottom of this. My goodness. I believe it. What do you think, Theo. Oh man, I mean... Caitlin gets really high one night and she fearfully tells you about the time that she was a teenager and she met a vampire. Mm-hmm. So as a teenager I feel like maybe your credibility sort of starts to slide. I don't know.

And in Switzerland do you say? Mm-hmm. Boarding school in Switzerland. Well, that does lend credibility to it. Really? What? Got a lot of funny accents up there? That's true. I mean really for me the only way you can tell is revisit the scene. Yeah, maybe stop gaslighting your boyfriend about it, you know. Book two tickets to Switzerland baby. Get out there, believe men.

Hmm. Find Nosferado. Oh dear. Lead your girlfriend to Nosferat too. Yeah, I think for me it's just the, it's just the teenager part. It's the, it being like half of somebody's lifetime ago, that makes me think like, have we all met somebody who's like told you a story one day about the time they saw a ghost and you realize halfway through that they're actually serious and it fucking sucks?

I've had a handful of these conversations. And there's no buono for me. Because I start off laughing at them, and then they make clear that they, no, they really did see a ghost one time. And for some reason it's almost always like, I was 15 in my grandparents' spooky old house or whatever, it's always like some heightened Thing it's always when someone's like a teenager or younger Going back to some point where your memory is gonna be shitty and unreliable And I don't know it always comes off to me like somebody who thought they saw a thing one time

And instead of just going well that obviously didn't happen they've instead to just thin. They've instead decided to just like hang on to to the thank. th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. than, like thin. thin. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. tho. thin, thin, the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their teanananananananananananananananananananananananan their their their their their their their their their their their their the one time and instead of just going, well that obviously didn't happen, they've instead decided to just like hang on to and internalize this thing and convince themselves that this was a very... They've sought it in their memory incorrectly. Hmm. Unless it was a Bigfoot, in which case, probably real. Probably real. Canonically real as far as this show is concerned, Bigfoot in which case, probably real. Probably real. Probably real. Canonically real, as far as this show is concerned. Bigfoot. The gentle wood ape.

Gentle Giant. Or Sasquatch. Sasquitch? Sassquitch. Oh boy. I'm not in the woods looking for Sasquatch. That's me folks. Looking for Satsquatch.

Well, I feel like we've solved all of the world's problems by yelling at the insurance man. We're so smart. We're so smart. We're really smart. Big old brains on us. Oh, folks, if you want to hear twice as many smart opinions, head over to Patreon.com. Forward slash Buntavista. Sign yourself up for some bonus treat episodes. They're like little candies or snackos if you were a dog.

Little extra treat for your week. Just a little, little snacky of audio, you know? All that kind of stuff. So, that'll do us. It'll do us for the week. We've got a crime pass. Crime pass is to slash Mark Fitzgibbon's tires on his undoubtedly ridiculously ridiculously expensive car. Oh, unchecked the box. Was that too? What was yours, Lucy? Oh, unchecked the little box that says that when he donates his body to science, that it won't be donated

to US military. Yes. It should make him come full circle because he looks like he was invented in the US military. Beautiful. All right, that's it folks. Enjoy your wigs. Enjoy your beautiful wigs. We'll talk to you next week. Bye. to you. you know the