Boonta Vista - EPISODE 141: Tuppence For Your Murder

Episode Date: March 24, 2020

Andrew, Ben, Lucy and Theo take a look at the MyGov hacking that wasn't, the ugly reared head of Gerry Harvey, the beCOVIDing of Harvey Weinstein, plus the return of Where in the Wide World Of Warnie Is Shane Warne World. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: boontavista.com/merchandise Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Welcome to Bunda Vista,, this episode 141. My name is Andrew, and I've just woken up in the empty hospital from the start of 28 days later. Nobody around. Lots of echoing. You might have heard a voice just then, but there's nobody around. Nobody around. I hear some shuffling over in the corner and coming out the side of his

head shaved in what's I guess meant to look disheveled but it's strangely attractive. All the rest of it is long in the right places, especially the back. It's a party happening back there. It's Ben. Hi Ben. Hey, what's going on? I don't know. I don't know. Just woke up. Hey, maybe this nurse coming towards us can help us out. It's Lucy. Oh it's me. It's not where I thought you were going with that. No, honestly, I was kind of surprised. You should know that you're the nurse. Come on when you are the nurse. One question, where is Killian Murphy? I know, right? Is he here?

A snack in that movie. Damn snack. He's a snack all the time. He's a snack 247. That's right. Even when he was a scarecrow? Oh, absolutely. Remember how he was just like an anti-Aaaaaaa? the the toa? to toa? to to to to to to to to the to to to to to to to the to to the to be, to be, the to be, the the thua, thua, thua, thi, to be, to be, thi, to be, to be, tooom. too, too, too, too, too? Is too? Is too? Is too? Is too? Is too? Is to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi? Is thi? Is thi? Is thi? Is he, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. the the thi. the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi.italist guy in the last movie and you're meant to be like, is he still, is he still bad?

Are we meant to think he's a bad guy? What's going on here? Hmm. Somebody managed to find like the one existing bad photo of him to put on IMDB tho? Why do you know what Killian Murphy's the worst photo? Why do you know what Kylian? Is the the the the the the the the th is th is th is th is th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thia thia thia thi thi thi thi thia thia thia thia to be to be to be to be to be to be to be thia thia thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thi is thia is thia is thia is thia thia thia thia thia thia thi is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tooooooooooooooooooooo thi thi thi thi too I am-Db photos are like, it's just like them at home, like, just like shit. Why do you know what Killian Murphy's IMDb photo looks like from memory? Um, all right. Okay, and stumbling towards us, I was filled with rage.

Muttering under his breath, he looks like he means murder. Let's hear what he has to say. I'm scared. It's Theo. So the only way to stream 28 days later is on Fox tel Now. So that's not going to happen. Okay. Just checked. Uh. Right. So in literal watching the movie, you went to the IMTB page for Killian Murphy just to look at him a bit. No, I was looking at it for the fucking, what's the thing, Piggy Blinders, the show that sucks for rules.

Uh, cockney criminals, they're gangsters. Yeah, that's the whole show. I've got a blade in me hat. Several seasons of it. I'll pay you tuppins for a murder. Fetting a murder for murder the murder th for a murder for a murder for a murder for ains for a murder. Tuppens for your murder, Governor. Fetch a murder for you, Governor. Oh, you've right, murdered him you have. I believe that's how it's going to show anymore. That's the whole show, just on a loop for seasons.

Speaking of on a loop. I do think we have to bring up our prep for this show while we're waiting for Ben. Andrew subjected us to four seasons worth of the different home improvements theme songs. Which weren't different in my head and it's put me in a bad zone. They were different. They just slightly changed key between each one. Now Theo, I would just like to clarify for the good listeners at home that I did not subject you to four seasons of theme songs from Home Improvement.

It covered seven seasons. But there were four variations of the song across those seven seasons. So I think it was seasons two and three shared the same song. Seasons four through six had the song across those seven seasons. So I think it was seasons two and three, she had the same song. Season four through six had the same song. Season seven had a different song and then Ben arrived and we didn't even get to the end of the video. But we can do that after this. How we get pumped up for the show. That's right. That's right. If I ran like a big box store or something like that and we had team the team the team all get excited. I would just play all of the home improvement theme songs in a row. People will listen to the first one, they'd be like, yeah, okay, this is pretty upbeat, it's pretty upbeat, it's pretty fun, the guy goes, oh? That's pretty wacky. And then I'd be like wait, don't the second one starts. You gotta say when the key change came in and the second one I was really I was right with you. Yeah, rapidly went downhill.

My mood. But there's so many things to feel good about these days. So much. You know? There's things to feel bad about but there's also things to feel good about. And so for this episode what we're going to do is we're going to we're going to go a little roller coaster roller coaster of emotions right Ben I love roller coaster perhaps as might have been described in the song of the same name by the Ohio players sure all right let's kind of you would back there Andrew I thought you were going with that one oh you were thinking the pepeps because you're a big th the the the the th the the the the the th th th the the the th the th the the the the th th the th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they're a they're a th. the the the the the the the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the tho tho ththere, Andrew. Not where I thought you were going with that one. Oh, you were thinking, uh, the Pepp's. Because you're a big Pepperhead. Uh, no, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna get in between you on this one, guys.

Theo, big time, red hot, Chili Peppers fan. What's your favorite red? What's your favorite Red Hot Chili Pebabs album? Your favorite pep-pep record? I think possibly California and then in brackets living in and then closed brackets and then just California again and that's on the album California I believe. And that's the one where every single track is named after a different one of the Freeways in LA. That's correct. Yeah, it's a beautiful album. Yeah, it's nine albums long. Theo can often be heard to say, I really like Anthony Keatis a lot more now that he is 60 with a page boy haircut and a nonce moustache. It's the glasses actually they do it for me.

Actually in my head, I haven't seen him lately. He's stuck with this look for this look for this look a th. th. this look a th. th. It th. It th. It th. It's a to look a little th. It's a little th. It's a little th. It's a little th. It's a little th. It's a little th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's....................................................... It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's a. It's the glasses actually they do it for me. Actually in my head I've seen him lately. He's stuck with this look for so long now, hasn't he? He's starting to look a little bit like Terry Richardson? Oh no. Oh, which is not good. That's not what anybody should be going for, including Terry Richardson. No, you're absolutely right. He should be aiming to look at himself as he can. Oh, that is not a good mustache. thuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to look, to look, to look, to look, thi, to look, to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look to look thi, thi, thi, thi. He's thi. He's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi's thi thi to as he can. Oh, that is not a good mustache. It's just, it's all.

I hope you're looking at the picture that I think you are. Does his moustache look particularly wet to you? Ah, I have to think of this. So a love roller coaster, Ben. As in you love to see some of the things on it. And you love to hate to see some some the other the other the other the other the other the other to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the other to to to to the other to to to to to to to to to to to to to toea to to to to to to to hausthihihihihihiausthiausthiausthiausthiausthihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihia to to to of the things on it and you love to hate to see some of the other things on it. What do you hate to love to see something? You're absolutely right Andrew. Okay go right the first time. All right. Everything sucks at the moment. I think we can all agree. No one wants to make your

podcast a coronavirus podcast but it's also an issue that is so pervasive it touches to to to to to to to to the the the to the the to the the the to the the the the the the to the the the the tou their th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to be to be to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. th. th. th. thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooes. thoooes. It's that is so pervasive it touches every single aspect of your life. Kind of hard to ignore. It's what we're doing right now. It's your personal life, it's your work life, it impacts your entertainment. It's the only thing anyone is talking about. It's the only thing that exists. We are a single issue plan at the moment, but we thought we would maybe try and blunt the psychic impact of this. We're going to alternate good stories with bad stories. So for instance, the good news is that New Star is increasing. They're going to, they're finally doing it. They're tacking $550 on a fortnight, which effectively doubles it. This is not a means-tested amount of money if you qualify for Job Seeker, Significance Allowance, Youth Allowance for Job Seekers the parenting payment

Partner allowance or the farm household allowance you will just get that full $550 amount per fortnight The bad news. This is actually not the bad news the bad news starts as next. This is the bad news of the good news. This is sub bad news from the good news. It only lasts for six months and it doesn't start until the 27th of April, which at time of recording is more than a month away. And considering how many people don't have the savings to get them true the next week if they lose their source of income, which is going to be true of a shit load of people. They're still pretty well fucked. Yeah, and luckily the way that the welfare system has been constructed in this country, or has, I guess, more appropriately been deconstructed in this country is to make that as hard as possible to claim and approve your eligibility for, There's like long cooling off

periods in case you were too excited to not starve to death. And yeah that generally takes a long time just to get into it. So they have waived a few of these things. So there's a waiting period that they've gotten rid of. There is a liquid asset test that they've gotten rid of. They've also expanded this to apply to, oh well, they've expanded job seeker and youth allowance for job seekers to apply to people who are casual employees and sole traders and self-employed. So that's not too horrendous.

People who are sole traded and self-employed as well don't have to do the quote mutual obligations which is things like going to a fucking job-seeker network whatever and doing you applying for a hundred jobs a week you just have to keep doing whatever it is your self-employed to do and that counts but back to more sub-bad news oh sorry no this is a full heading bad news it's fucked it's fucked almost by design it fucked. Almost by design it seems. Yeah almost like breaking it down continuously year after year after year after year until it barely works and makes people either stop trying to get money from the government or just kill themselves. It doesn't make

for good infrastructure. Well yeah in the case of what we see happening at the moment particularly the things that they've been doing for so long are deliberately like shipping all of the core parts of the services away to online and reducing the amount of people they have to actually help you with trying to make a claim or anything like that. So it's kind of like now that there has been a massive influx of people trying to get on the service that they've gone oh hey that's right you need staff to deal with that you need staff you need to help people of course it's worth differentiating that that's now that like real people need welfare I

think from the government's perspective. There's a solid drawing a line about like who deserves this money. It's not just just that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's right that's right that's that's that's right's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th right thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thoooooooo. thooooo. thooooooo. the thoooooooooooo. that's right that's that's that's that's think from the government's perspective. There's a solid drawing a line about like who deserves this money. Yes, it's not just you know dirty people who won't pull them up by their own bootstraps. It's regular ordinary people that have been affected. Yeah, and this is the thing we've seen a lot of people pointing out. And we'll do it too. Isn't it, isn't it kind of interesting how they've just sort of shown that with the stroke of a pen they can say actually we can afford to pay all the people twice as much as we're paying. Don't ask why we weren't doing that before. Or why we are we decided it's not enough to live off but we thought it was before.

If you do ask me I'm gonna get really pissy at a press conference for some reason. Just going to get cross about it. He's cross. Just going to get real cross. He's a cranky dad all the time. Just getting his little arms and crossing them and doing a little wiggle. Come on.

Come on, Tyson, I've told you already. Oh, dear. Blair, get in the car. Um, real man. I'm darts have to explain myself to you. I'm your dad. Um, yeah, it's, it's very, it's very ridiculous all around. So, what's, uh, what's happened in the case of this is, there has been the obvious physical issues, which is that, um, all of a sudden, thousands of people have been there has been the obvious physical issues, which is that all of a sudden

thousands of people have been turning up at Centilink officers around the country. Again because loads of people have lost their jobs, they've all tried to go on to the website. The website doesn't work because it's made by design to only serve a maximum number of people and all those people have then gone down to officers and we've seen some Quite frankly distressing scenes over the last Day or two of lines, you know spanning several blocks of people waiting to get into Centilink and make their claims then this resolved itself in was a Bondi? Today. Yeah, Bondi Junction. Yep with the police coming? Yep, with the police claims. And this resolves itself in, was it Bondi, today?

Yeah, Bondi Junction. Yep, with the police coming down and turning people away and saying, come back tomorrow, when it will definitely be totally fine. No, I don't want to be like an, like a backseat driver for the government here. Oh, sorry, can I just, I don't want to stop you there, but I'm going to. You can't actually drive from the back seat. The pedals would be obstructed by the seat in front of you. You wouldn't be able to get your arms, especially in your case around to where the steering wheel is.

Wow. It'd be very hard to see. You should probably drive from the front seat. I mean, look, it speaks a lot to your attitude that you would come to that conclusion. Of course, you've totally discounted a sort of Beverly Hillbilly style scenario where I'm operating through a sequence of levers and pulleys. Oh, you're describing sort of a Mr. Bean situation. the government here. Oh, you're describing sort of Mr. Bean scenario.

The government here. But it seems to me like if they'd have had even more more the the the to to to to to be more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more that a more that a more than than a to be more to be more to be more that a that a to be a that a sort a sort of a sort of a that a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a sort of a that a that a that a that a that a that a that a that a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to bea.o.a. to bea. to bea. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. to. to. to. seat drive and Mr. Bean scenario, the government here, but it seems to me like if they'd have had even more than like a day or two's planning for this, that they would have very much understood that if you said, hey, a whole bunch of people are going to be fucking shit out of luck when we close everything down, and also we are going to be offering these payments, then the combination of those two things which you know people would have certain amount of data around you could maybe prepare for, ease it out, maybe make it so that you don't have to go in, but instead we're discovering this on fucking Monday morning when everyone just clumps in one area to get sick so that

they can get some money to continue living. Seems to be like there could have been a few things improved there, but again, I'm just back here with my pulleys and levers. Well, it's easy with the benefit of 2020 backseat vision, you know, we only found out as a government and as a people about coronavirus, I believe at 8 a.m. this morning. It's the first I heard of it. Maybe a day ago.

Maybe a few days ago, maybe Friday. But then it was the weekend and you know, at the meantime. You work for the weekend. That's right. Everybody's doing it. Everybody wants a sweet romance. God, that's a good song. Yeah, so you know, hey, bit of a problem. Bit of a problem with going down to the Centiling office and attempting to apply for Centilink.

So, you know, before having the cops come down and tell everybody to bloody rack off, they said, hey, you know, what you should do is just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just to to to to to to to just to to to to just to the website, just to to the website, just to to to to to to to to to to to to the the before having the cops come down and tell everybody to bloody rack off, they said, hey, you know, what you should do is just go to the website and do it. Just go to this handy dandy website that we had set up. Just go to this website that hasn't worked for a good 10 years. I like that getting into your my Gov account is essentially the start of Get Smart. It really is. It's so fucked up. th up. th up. th. th. th. th. th. th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th, you th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, you thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, you thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to thi's to to thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo thi thi. account is essentially the start of Get Smart. It really is. It's so fucked up. Except you forget what you have to do at every single door, every single time. Does the last door circumcise him?

Is that what happened? It's heavily implied. Well, it did the first time. Oh no, wait, he's. Holy Jewish to begin with. Okay. How about those Mygov messages? Don't you just hate them?

Don't they make you feel bad? And so... Hey, you've got a notification. Oh, great. They're finally on to me. I spent like days trying to log in to Mygov. I spent like days to logto log into my gov it was a whole operation and I was paranoid because I thought it was another centerlink debt and I got in there it was just some pointless notice about a thing that they changed at tax time. Yeah it was like

don't don't forget to lodge the subcredit B before April 19th. It's like a wild operation to get in there and that's all all that's all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all it was all th. It's like a wild operation to get in there and that's all it was. Love it. Everything's functional. Sure, it's hard to get into, but once you get there, it's very easy to do what you've got to do just so long as the devious Ruskis don't from a concrete bunker far below Moscow do a denial of service attack on Australia's government infrastructure. On the very day everyone needs to get in there. Bad news, everybody.

Oh no! That is what happened. They routed all of their dash cam traffic through my government once. And the thing crashed like a vehicle featured in a Russian dash cam video. That is the only cultural export from Russia that I'm aware of. No, that's not true. There's also the slap competition. Oh, yeah. Oh, mama. Those people are getting concussed. Have you ever seen any of those there? No. It's good. You're missing out, buddy. You're missing out. Watch those guys.

Get the gymnast powder on the hand? No. It's good. You're missing out, buddy. You're missing out. Watch those guys. Get the gymnast powder on the hand and slap each other with full force on the side of the head. Dude's just getting knocked out. Why aren't they Russian videos of people being kind to each other? Don't think there's a lot of those. I'm sure anybody's recording that. No one's

going to watch that, you know? I would. I'd watch it. I'd watch it. There's also the MMA that they have that's clearly illegal and taking place in big sand pits. You can watch a lot of that on YouTube. What are you watching Andrew? What is your how do you have time? you've got a job? you've family. Just watching regular stuff on YouTube? Geez. Like dash cam videos, which feature a lot of crashes, and crashing is what the Mygov site did. Oh. We're back on track. So, um, notorious dumb shit. Minister for government services, Stuart Robert,

two first name having Mr. Bean looking fuck wit just an absolute dead shit of the highest order this is the man who got sacked from the defense ministry from going to he was the guy who went to the dinner with a bunch of like Chinese defense lobbyists without telling the defense department that he was doing it, receiving the illegal gift of a number of Rolexes, and then taking them and distributing them as undeclared gifts to people like the Prime Minister.

King. Which is great stuff. So huge, huge fucking idiot he is on record. I'm sure if you go and look at his Wikipedia page there will be a long like controversies and dunderheaded decisions section for all the different portfolios he's been fired from and luckily he's in charge of this one now. And so when it crashed as soon as say all the people who are newly unemployed tried to use it he went oh we've been D-D-O-S-Duh! We've been swatted by a teen on call of duty. And he said here's a quote from this new story from the Guardian mygov has not been offline it simply suffered from a distributed denial of service attack

this morning, he told reporters, but refused to provide more detail on whether it was an attack. But by question time at 255 p.m., Robert was forced to take back his statement telling Parliament it wasn't an attack, but just the alarms that are designed to detect and stop DDOS attacks triggering to to to to to to to the the the the trig. their their their their their their their their the just the alarms that are designed to detect and stop DDOS attacks triggering due to a large volume of people trying to log in. They showed no evidence of a specific attack today, he said. Mygov had last week been able to cope with about 6,000 users logging on at once, but Robert said this was upgraded to 55,000 over the weekend. In expectation that many more Australians would have been logging on after the increase in business shutdowns as a result of the coronavirus

pandemic forcing more people in unemployment. Robert told the Parliament that about 95,000 people were trying to access my government once, causing the alarms to trigger. There's a lot of fun things about this isn't the I think my favorite is the one hour 55 minute window between him being going we've been hacked. The system. There's the system. There's the system. There's the system. There's the system. There. There. There. There. There. There. There's th. There's th. There's th. There's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi's thi's th. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's a th. It's a the the the the th. I's a the the the the the the the the the th. I's a the the the th the the th th th th going, we've been hacked! The system's been hacked, we've been compromised! And then one hour, 55 minutes later coming out and saying, I regret to announce we have not been hacked. There was no hacking. No hacking took place. You know what I've been thinking about a lot lately? The program Chernobyl. Just remember watching that and just watching like a series of like bad decisions and just ignoring things going wrong.

And just go like, oh, gee, it must have sucked to be somewhere where your government just lied to you constantly. Just over and over for the smallest things. Just petty things, just little things they didn't need to lie about. He's not in Hawaii. why would you be in Hawaii? And just a reminder, this is not the first time they've done this. So they fucked up with the census in 2016, and they had more traffic than they expected. And then Michael McCormick, who was the minister responsible,

David Cash, the guy, the head statistician said that had been brought offline by DDOS attacks, and then Michael McCormack walked that back, much in the same sort of way that it happened here. I'll also say that a service that only allows 6,000 users logging on at once is fucking clown shoes. It's like they're hosting it on the free tier of AWS. It's like they... Like Geocities page. Yeah. Look at the little flashing gift come back soon.

Yeah. Under construction. What is coronavirus relief. Angel Fire? They bought the old NeoPets servers. Like, they would have to try to make it that bad. And in fact, I mean, with everything that we know about the Australian government, I'm going to go ahead and throw out a wild conspiracy theory that they did try to make it this shitty. Now it's biting them in the arse because they're fucking idiots and they don't remember this stuff.

Well can I also just note that during all of this you know that a lot of people understandably are very very angry at the government except I've noticed like what I would consider in my own little echo chamber, of course, as we all have, I've noticed a distinct lack of people saying, God, I wish Labour were in government right now. It's just people saying, I fucking hate the liberal party and they suck, and Scott Morrison shouldn't be the prime minister. But nobody is like, damn, Labor would be in here competently handling this. Damn, if Bill Shorten was the PM, we'd all be a brunch right now. Well, you say that, Andrew, but Anthony Albanese is telling reporters Stuart Robert has not enjoyed a cyber attack, he suffered an incompetence attack.

Yeah, you've got that a rap air horn queued up there, Andrew, that you can just hammer. I might, but I don't know if I'm going to do it. It it it it it th th th th th th th th th th th th th to do it. It to do it. It to do it. It to do it. It to do it. It to do it. It to do it. It to be th th th th th th the. It thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. the thi. the. the. the the the thean thean. thean to thean to thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. the. queued up there Andrew that you can just hammer. It seems like the... But I don't know if I'm going to do it. It's... it's like the only requirement for being the head of the LP these days is just being able to just rack off, you know, subpar subpar zingers. It sucks. Can I just give one more example of a really subpar unbelievable cyber lie? You know we've had shitloads of cyber untruths. We've had shitloads of federal ministers briefly tweet porn or like porn tweets. Yes and then they claim they were hacked? Yes. So like when the AFP had to... the AFP had to announce that Greg Hunt was not hacked when he liked an X-rated

porn tweet from his account, which is great. Just like how they think they're going to get away with it, it's so great. Oh, it was a hacking. I'm been hacked. And then the police are like, buddy, don't, please don't draw any more attention attention attention attention attention attention attention attention attention attention attention attention attention that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that, I was hacked, and I'm referring this to the police, and then sometime later the police say, no you weren't, and they just never acknowledge it, and that's it.

All it does is create really good soundbites for like labor or greens ministers in estimates where they're like, and uh, do you remember what the advice was of the police on that that tweet we that that that tweatweat we that that tweat we tweat, tweat, twee, twee, twee, twee, twee, twee, twee, thwee, threat, threat, uh, uh, uh, uh, threat, threat, the police, that, that, that, that, thi, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, the police, threat, threat, threat, threat, threat, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, thi. th that that tweet there it's great every time they say how's the jacking off going I wish they would I'd vote for him then I'm gonna have to take the jack off on notice I'm afraid can't tell you I don't have the data on the jacking off here currently can't tell you how hard the nut was oh oh the point I was going to make though is that like you would think that maybe, maybe if Labor during the election campaign had committed to raising Newstart or had committed to investing more funds into my gov or the welfare system or anything like that, they would be in a really good position at this point to say,

see, here is really clear evidence that we would be a superior government to the one that is currently in place. But instead we can all be very reassured by the idea that if the Labor Party were in government right now, that they would be in the midst of a review of whether or not they should raise Newstart at some point in the future. They would think about it. They'd contemplated.

Remember how inspiring that was? Remember when Woke Queen Penny Wong kind of just frowned a little bit at the Newstart payment? Eyebrows. Yes. Yes. Fucking idiots. I just, yeah, like, I don't know. I've been looking at a lot of this stuff and just thinking like, Labor's chronic aversion to saying, here's a thing we actually want to do, here's some

part of like the welfare state or the country's infrastructure or the medical system or whatever, that we want to like significantly invest in and rebuild. Everything is like some means-tested bullshit or some really specific or whatever, that we want to like significantly invest in and rebuild. Everything is like some means-tested bullshit or some really specific little sliver of a thing that they're going to commit to, to the point where like you can't look and say, ah, if you were in, you would have been doing things really differently. Maybe next time, I'll vote for you instead. Instead it's just like yeah we committed to doing a review with a view to at some point increasing you

start maybe. Crazy to me that they're still doing this. Like after however long it's been it's like it must be a year or so since the last election right they're just just just hammering the same shit. Just cruising along. Let's keep on the same tactic that has lost us to the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election the election. the election. the election. th. th. th. the thi thi to to to to to to to to to to to be to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. the. the. the. the. the the. the the. the. the. the the to to to to to to to to to to's keep on the same tactic that has lost us to the election three times. Yeah, I mean that's always the stunning part to me is when anybody says, you know, they they present to you the classic argument of, well, labor have to win an election before they can get in and do any of this stuff. And that's why we've continued with these tactics that have lost us several elections in a row. And they're not changing anything. Just sticking with it.

Just stick to our guns. It's going so well. Very cool. Very cool. Now, someone who is actually very cool sometimes. Little friend of the show that we haven't checked in on in a while. And we're gonna have to do that now. One, one, one, where is Shane Warren?

Where is Shane Warren? Where is Shane Warren? Where is Shane Warren? Where is Shane one? Where is Shane Warren? Where is Shane Warren? Where is Shane Warren? Where is Shane Worn? Where is Shane Worn? Where in the wide world of where's Mourney is Shane Mourney Worn. I just I feel like it would make thematic sense if the last light of that was there is Shane Morn because we're about to say where Shane Morn is. Well we haven't answered it yet we're getting to it. We're going to do the Wares Wally TV show theme song next time.

I don't remember that. I'll send it to you. You're going to like what you hear. But Ben, Ben, let me let me furiously internalize that criticism and say the next time, the next time we do something to the tune of the shame one song, I will finish by telling you where the subject of the song is. How about that? Oh, I love that. Okay. So what the fuck are we talking talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk talk we we we we we we we we we to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to you to you to to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. to to to that. to that? Oh I love that. Okay. So what the fuck are we talking about here? Take us away, Ben. Well, it would be hard to say that I think if someone ran up to you on the street and said you have 10 seconds to tell me whether Shane Warren is a good or bad person. Oh. I mean, all of you guys, you've got 10 seconds to answer. he a good or a bad person? Oh, he's gone to heaven or hell. The hair stuff's kind of weird, he's clearly a pervert. You have five seconds left. I need no answer. It's bad for me, I'm sorry, it's bad.

Uh, it's got to be bad. No, you got to answer right now. Those are all that charity fraud, oh, it might, but, you pieces of shit, you were all wrong. Here's a story from the Associated Press, not the Australian one, because they shut that one down, just a regular Associated Press. Legendary Australian, oh, a typo in this. Well, maybe they should shut this one down too. There's a blue line. Ignor the blue line under I don't like looking at it it's fine. Ignore the blue line. Close your eyes. Legendary Australian legs spinner Shane Warren has turned his hand from making gin

to making hand sanitizer as shortages frustrated attempts to control the coronavirus outbreak. Warren who retired from test cricket in 2007 with the record 708 gin distillery. The co-founder of the company include two prominent West Australian surgeons and warn so the company would turn its production from gin to alcohol hand rubs, which will be provided to two hospitals in the Western state. This is a challenging time for Australians. We all need to do what we can to help our health care system

combat this disease and save lives, one said, I am happy 708 has the ability to the shift and encourage others to do the same. He did not say that. Absolutely, like that's written by a PR person. He would never be able to string together a sentence that coherent. One has a long history of charitable work earlier this year a baggy green Australia Cap he offered at auction raised $584,000 for victims of wildfires which were out of Australia's Eastern States.

And you, pieces of shit, say that he's not a good person. It rules that Shane Warn of all people has done more to fight coronavirus than Elon Musk. Oh, I was gonna, he has finally, I think, committed to making ventilators now after days of being like, like, if someone asks me me if someone was really nicely. Fear is the mind killer. Stop panicking about fucking moving on my employees still have to go to work. Well I'm excited. He's fucking sucks.

I'm excited for him to produce all those ventilators just like he saved all those fucking kids with his magical tin can submarine. It's gonna call some surgeon a pedophile. It's gonna be the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. It's th. It's gonna be th. It's gonna be th. It's gonna be the their their th. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. Fe fea their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their is their their their their their their their fear is their fear is their fear their fear their fear their fear their fear. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. I th. I's th. I's thi. I's the. I's the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. their their their their their their th his magical tin can submarine. It's going to call some surgeon a pedophile. Yep, it's going to be spinning around pointing his finger at every person he sees, pedophile. Pettophile. Pettophile. You're a pedophile. Well done, Warnie. I give you permission to slide into the DMs of one more bikini model. Yes. You're in the clear you've got some credits for DM slides. We give you permission to slide into the the the the the the the the the to the the to the the the to the to the the the to the the to the Dee the Di p to to the to point the to point to point to point to point to point to point to point to point to pointing to point to point to point to pointing to pointing to pointing to pointing to pointing to point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point point to point to point to point to point to point to point to to to the d the d the d the d the D. point the D. point the DM the DM the DM the DMs the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of the DMs of theirs the DMs of theirs to the DMs of the for DM slides. We give you permission to slide into the DMs of one Lucy Valentine. No no definitely can you imagine? Certainly not his type. Just a little like the

winky emoji that also has the tongue coming out and he's just said a horniest of my gorgeous how's it going? Oh can you imagine. You'd have to reply to, you'd be like, it's Shane Warren. Oh, you're not going to not reply to Shane Warren. Exactly. Can't leave him on red. It would have to be like, please leave me and my husband in peace.

I'm on it, but I simply must decline. So that's a story of an Australian not being a piece of shit. Oh, do we have a one of an Australian being a piece of shit? What a shock? Everybody's favorite massive fucking piece of shit. Jerry, fucking Harvey. You know, when this country is facing times of trouble, you know, his doubt, fear, you know, anxiety, you know, there's only one person, the Australian media can turn to our weather vein, you know, our moral compass, the person, our shining light will guide us through. Jerry Harvey, the Harvey Norman guy.

He's our rock if the rock was a petrified piece of shit. Just, like, just absolutely incomprehensible why they continue to ask him what he thinks about fucking anything. I don't say ask him, he's just out there saying it. I guess if you have enough money, you can just be like, hey, I want to say this on the news. He just like calls up Channel 9. And he's like, I've got some feelings about how much kids are having avocado to thank.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi just just just just just just absolutely thi thi just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely just absolutely th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to say this on the news. He just like calls up Channel 9 and he's like I've got some feelings about how much kids are having avocado toast. Please give me... Channel 9 like I am locked and loaded ready to say some fucking idiotic stuff on the news. And everyone at Channel 9 is like yes we are rock hard, the cameras are rolling, get ready. Andrew, have you got that little clip cued up there?

Oh, nope. Well, thank God I asked. Should we explain who Jerry Harvey is? Good night, everybody. Good night. I mean, I feel like we've maybe spoken about him a few times before, if you're if you're not from Australia imagine the worst store in the world and imagine that this store is somehow everywhere and that it's failing everywhere and yet its owner is a billionaire and is also

considered by the media to be one of the most respected figures in the country and he sells appliances yeah so that's genius no one has walked into the country. He sells appliances. He's like a Best Buy, I guess. No one has walked into the store for 22 years. Yeah. If Best Buy was had seven times the floor size, there was a lot of really shitty furniture with one staff member covering approximately six football fields worth of furniture, there was a tiny little section that had boxed copies of Norton Antivirus 2011. And then there's another section that has $2,000 fridges and $1,500 neutral bullets. Inexplicably still in business. It takes 25 minutes to get to the neutral bullets and then back to the checkouts.

Imagine you want to buy a mattress, but you can't. Well here is a clip of the very man himself, geriatric vampire, Jerry Harvey. It's not the Spanish flu that killed 15 million people just after the first world war, you know. Why are we so scared about getting this virus? There's pretty much nothing to get scared of. Well, try telling that to thousands of Italian families and Chinese families. But that's there. We're here. I'm a I'm a maybe I should be really scared. Guess what? I'm not really scared? Well you're in the worst category. I know I'm a sitting duck. If I never it... If I never see you again, it's been nice knowing you.

I admire your optimism, but it's not... it's really not funny. But to me, I've got to be positive. I've got to 80 years of age, I've had a wonderful life, and I think to myself, I'm just going to keep going as if nothing's happened. We are all very happy for you to declare that your life's been nice and to shuffle the fuck off. I love the guy for us. I mean I'm glad for it.

That's fine if he wants to die. That's fine by me. He's ready to go, yeah. He's taken people with him. Yeah. I assume he's got a small army of sex slaves in his secret hinterland mansion that will all get infected as well. The guy from 60 minutes laughing at his not very good joke and then try to tell him, yeah it's no laughing man, no it's not funny. Yeah, it's not funny but. These people are ghouls. There is a quote here from him though which I think is the important part. He says you know this is an opportunity.

I'm sorry, I'm probably not doing him justice here, because you all just heard what he sounded like. Let me try that again. Moble. Jerry says, you know, this is an opportunity. Our sales are up in Harvey Norman and Australia by 9% on last year. Our sales and freezers are up 300%? What about air purifiers? Up 100%? Can I just say, in the entire history of this show from any host,

that is the first time I think someone has done a voice and haven't been like good. What about Lucy's Pauline Hanson? Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's very good as well. It's very good as well. It's very accurate though. It's very accurate. It's like being in the room. What about my, excuse me, what about my Jordan Peterson? Oh, it's pretty good too.

I'm going to have to wheel this back. While it is right back in. Also that quote is just so disgusting. I don't know where to start with it. The phrases is grim in particular because I assume people are buying those to store bodies in. Yeah, it's just wonderful, really representative of the kind of model citizen that Australia should be turning to for opinions. The kind of person who says, yes, people are dying, but I'm making more money now. You just got to have a positive mental attitude. You've got to look on the bright side.

You've got to be grateful for what you have. You've got to, his air purifier sales up 100%, you know? Which I assume is, I assume the air purifier thing is also off the back of the bush the bush the bush the bush the bush the bush the bush bush bush the bush the bush bush bush. Which I assume is, I assume the air-purified thing is also off the back of the bush-fires Mike. Probably. Oh, God. He'd be fucking loving it. Especially dark.

Oh. What a piece of shit. What a piece of shit. true skid mark on the underpants of Australia, that man. Now, you know, we'd never do this sort of thing. You know, you hate to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get the theck theck and theck and theck and get thiocu theatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatu and this this kind this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort this sort thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheathe this sort this sort this sort this sort that, that, that, that, that, that, thi, that, thus, thi. th. thi. th. thus and thi. thi. thi. thi. thus and thi. that thi. that sincere and it's embarrassing to beg in times like this. And I would never normally reach out like this, but really, from the bottom of my heart, I am pleading with you, COVID-19, the coronavirus, please kill Jerry Harvey. Just kill him. We don't agree on a lot of things, mainly what you're doing to the entire planet, but if you

could just sort of kill old Jerry Harvey over on his perch, then be delightful. You would have done some good. If you'd like to make it up to us in some small way, a token gesture if you will. A peace offering. Speaking of a peace offering from COVID-19, aka the baid germ. The big sea. The big sea? Oh no! Now, what are we going to call the thi. to do good good good good good good good good good good? You to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do. to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do that. You. You. You. You. You would. You would. You would. You would. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You would. You. You would. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You you. You you. You you. You you. You you. You you. You you. You you. You to do to do to do. You to do. You to do. You to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do to do that. I that. I that. I that. I that. that that that that that to to that that to that that that that that. I would would that. I would that. I would that. You would to do that. to do to do the aka the bad germ. The big sea. The big sea. Oh no. Now what are we going to call the other big sea? Things are getting worse from day to day.

Shut up there. Speaking of that type of thing. Uh, slightly better news. Harvey Weinstein has coronavirus. He does. He does have coronavirus. And you know, a lot of people, I think, as a nature of the times we live in, where we should try and think about the flow on effects of things, not just a surface examination of them, where we should be intersectional with how we appraised things, we'll tell us that maybe this is bad, maybe the sign that someone in Rikers or whichever New York Jailer was in got coronavirus. Maybe it's

bad to laugh at Harvey Weinstein getting coronavirus because it's a sign of how public health is failing these people, you know, and they would probably be right right tell us that, but at the same time, ha ha ha ha. You can just laugh at anything now because it's coronavirus time. So fuck you, Harvey Weinstein, you got coronavirus, bitch. It's truly couldn't have happened to a nice a guy. And especially since, you know, there was that whole weird coincidence where like the instant all his many crimes became public, like his dick fell off and he became the sickest man in the world, that neck brace magically appeared and all that kind of shit. It's like walking around on crutches.

Yeah, so we can only assume that he is also now massively immunocompromised and the germs can get right in through the big hole where his dick used to be before it fell off. So good having a medical doctor on the podcast. That's right. So hopefully sometime soon our IP Harvey Weinstein. Yeah let's just say RIP in advance. RIPs to the big one. Hmm. Peace out to the big one. Peace out, bitch. Peace out, you horrible, horrible piece of shit. Yes, there was more stuff coming out like because he did finally get sentenced recently. That was the other nice bit of good news was when his lawyer said, hey, if you give him more than five years,

your honor, he's going to die in prison. And they went, 23 years, bitch! Seemingly stitching that one up. And everybody collectively said, yay. Except for, I don't know, maybe his lawyer was like, yay, more appeals and stuff to ring some money out of this. But yes, more stuff came out of that on like appeal and everything and sentencing and just a reminder of how incredibly hate as it was, which is why we will continue to have a modest chuckle at Harvey Weinstein having the Corona.

Let's hope no nice murderers or anything catch it from him. So that's some good news about rich people. Bad news about rich people is that they appear to be getting all of the coronavirus tests first before anybody else. Cool. It is cool. Yeah we're kind of hoping, you know, well no, sorry when I say we, I don't mean anyone, I don't know if anyone was hoping this, but it seemed like maybe coronavirus would be the great equalizer, right? Like going through airport security, although no, that doesn't apply to rich people either.

This was going to be the one thing where it like, everyone had to fucking deal with it. You know, it doesn't matter how rich you are, you're dealing with the same shit the rest of us are. And then it's a- Don't die after hot wings. No, they have a special kind of hot wings. The no diarrhea hot wings. The secret they're keeping from it. $10,000 per week. No, you would think that. But then you see the most cringe-worthy clip in

the world of a bunch of dipshits singing Imagine. I wish I never saw it. Why would you click on it? I almost put it in as a bonus track at the end of the last episode and I dropped it in I dragged the in, and then I spent 10 to 20 minutes putting different fart sounds throughout it. And then at the end of it, I was just like, no amount of fart sounds makes this funny or fun to listen to. And then I took it out, and then I uploaded the episode without, without celeb singing, imagine.

It's so bad as well, and I didn't realize, because I'd kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind the start, the start, the start,'d kind of seen the start and the finish like clicking through it but as I was editing the audio I listened to the whole thing. It's just bad. There's nothing worse than archipela singing. It makes me want to die. They're all singing different tempos and different keys and oh the wife of the show my wife Elna she just couldn't stop she was captivated by the rest of the day I was like walking past whatever room she was in I'd just hear it like what are you doing Ellen I don't know but yeah you would think that it would be the equalizer, yet we see all of these reports of celebrities and news saying, hey, I'm Idris Elba and I'm very handsome and completely

asymptomatic and I've tested positive for coronavirus. And this is not super great when you contrast it with all of the reports of people saying like, I have been going into hospital and then being like, we won't test you unless you are going to die, basically. And also when we do, we're going to charge you thousands of dollars because this is America. We're insane for medical money. So that's not terribly cool. Not good. Don't like it. I don't like it. I don't like it. Yeah, there's just report after report of people going, oh I'm asymptomatic and I had the test for some reason.

So here's a story from Reuters, how one elite New York medical provider got its patients coronavirus tests. As US authorities scrambled to ramp up the nation's capacity to test for coronavirus last week, at least 100 executives and other New Yorkers of means had easy access to testing, according to two sources familiar with the activities of a little known medical service catering to the affluent. I love to be of means. Of means.

What a fucking means. Damp way of saying that. It's the oldest money word there is. He is, I don't know how to say this. He's of means. They should call them nices. Hmm. Hmm. These people paid a $5,000 a year membership fee for a medical concierge service in New York

City called Solis Health, which worked with Enzo Clinical Labs Incorporated to test its members for COVID-19 according to the sources. The arrangement gave members, which include people in finance, entertainment, advertising, in media industries access to the tests at home at a time New York Governor Andrew Cuomo said the state had the capacity to test just a few hundred patients a day. The two sources declined to provide the identities of the people the company tested for coronavirus and rotors could not establish them. The demand for the coronavirus testing services provided by Solis understores the lack of preparedness of preparedness of public health institutions. The access who have provided provided provided the latest example of how well-to-do people

got coronavirus tests at a time of scarcity. Solis is part of a lucrative cottage industry where membership costs can run into tens of thousands of dollars a year for services such as special access to doctors and private emergency rooms. Fuck you people. Wow. Go fuck yourself.

Just... Yep. Wow. Holy fuck. Go fuck yourself. Just, yeah. Yeah. It just, like we all know this is the case that this is what being wealthy entails, but to see it laid bare is just so fucked up. I said on an episode ages and ages ago about my very true conspiracy theory belief that the president is given a crazy experimental cocktail of drugs that makes him immune to illness and also super strong. I believe this is true and that it's these concierge services that

they get them from. They go in there, they get given a shot, gives them bionic legs or some shit. They are just living on a completely different plane to what we're living on. Because they have money they can just throw in the toilet for anything. I believe they're being treated with a tink tour of Bigfoot DNA. That'll do it. Mm-hmm. He is immune to all diseases. famously disease filled the woods. Well you might drink out of some still water, you know? Well, Bigfoot wouldn't do that.

Anyway, Bad news about rich famous people. Good news about rich famous people, Fashion designer Christian Suryano making free face masks for New York coronavirus relief from BuzzFeed. Apparently he is offering to make free face masks for the coronavirus outbreak relief efforts in New York coronavirus relief from BuzzFeed. Apparently he is offering to make free face masks for the coronavirus outbreak relief efforts in New York. After New York Governor Andrew Cuomo spoke of fears that they may not be enough for medical workers. His reps told Buzzfeed news that the two are currently in talks to figure out,

quote, how this will work, but the masks will be made specifically for medical service workers. The deal was struck on Twitter on Friday. Jesus Christ. Oh, I hate everything. When the Project Runway star tweeted at the governor saying, if he and the state need masks, his team will make some. I have a full sewing team on staff working from home that can help. Ben, you put the story on here, and I think that's bad now. No it's good. I mean it's shit how it came about but I think if you compare and

contrast this with Elon Musk who is like every single social issue where people have been like please can you help he spends three months on Twitter being like fuck you and then he comes in last second with something that doesn't work. This guy in like the space of six hours, was like, hey, would it help if we made masks? Oh, okay, we're making masks now, where do I said them? Like, it is such a tight turnaround for someone who has the access to some resources being like, oh, fuck, I can probably do something.

And then they did something. And like, obviously, they've spun this the fucking PR exercise. The guy's thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thui, thui, thu. thu. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. the. It, the. th exercise. The guy's Twitter account now is just him sharing articles about how he did this really good thing, which undermines it a whole lot. But... Well, how he did it or how he said he was going to do it. I think it's being done. I don't know. They're posting a lot of photos of all the masks they're making. Well, that's good. Are they stylish? Do they they can custom fit them to people's faces for maximum seal as well, which is quite nice. I know this sounds like a shit story, but I think it's a good one. I am in favor of this one capitalist pig in this instance.

Well, I will just say that as long as there is evidence that this has actually happened at some point, that I can be much more on board with it because I think with the speed speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed the speed of th of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of thi thi of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of thi, which which which thi, which thi, which which thi, which thi, which th, which th, which of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of th, which th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the speed the speed of the speed of the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. thi thi thi thi th there is evidence that this has actually happened at some point that I can be much more on board with it because I think with the speed of the new cycle and everything that it's much easier now for people to say I am announcing that I'm going to do a thing and everybody goes wow that's that's nice and then it all just kind of moves on and whether or or not you do it or are successful at it or whatever, that's usually the part that sticks. We just got to tweet it Elon Musk. We've got to be like, hey, wouldn't it be freaking epic if you made a ventilator? It'd be so much fake.

I would upvote it so hard. You win the incident today by stopping people from dying of asthma and other respiratory illnesses. That's right. Now we got a bit of a mystery on our hands, folks. We have a bit of a mystery. And to aid us in solving the mystery, I am going to have to repurpose a song from earlier in the show.

Go on then. Joe, Joe. Where's, where's, where's, where's, where's? Where is Joe, Joe, Joe Biden? Where is Joe, where is Joe, Where is Joe B, D, he and Joe Biden. Joe Biden's dead. Yeah, he's dead. He's straight up dead.

He's full-on dead. He just stood up dead. He just stood up too fast. All the blood went out of his head. Then his brain stopped working, he killed over and died. That's right, he has Joe Diden. He has Joe Diden. There is unfortunately no Biden. Theo, do you have one? No.

Oh, it's racked with grief. Oh, it's very sad about Joe being gone. Where's Joe Biden? Where is Joe Biden? He's Joe Heiden. Oh, there he is. There he is. In a grave.

Mm-hmm. So, um, what's the deal, everybody? What's the deal? Um, he's just kind of disappeared? Well, I just, I went to look up to see if he's been doing anything since I logged on to the, to the podcast over here, and the, uh, the article says Joe Biden has been keeping a low profile since the primaries in Illinois. Classically what you want to do during a... Just a low profile where you are not seen in public, you don't talk to anybody, your interns do some tweets,

they do a thumbs up in someone's Instagram story. In a DJ set on Instagram. In a DJ set on Instagram? In a DJ set on Instagram, a thumbs up, that's the only interaction you have with the public while an insane pandemic is going on and Bernie Sanders is out there online every day, trying to make people feel better about it. So, I mean, Joe Biden is either dead or he has the coronavirus.

Yes, but have you considered this story from ABC, the American one, it's a copy of our one? The Biden campaign declined to respond to the criticisms raised by the hashtag, where is Joe Biden? Quote, the bottom line is that everything from providing better access to where I physically live and be able to broadcast from there as well as our headquarters is underway. We've hired a professional team to do that now. Someone pretending to be Biden on a text message told reporters. Weekend at Biden told reporters. It's a little above my pay grade as to how we do that, but that's desperately what we're trying to do. Just grammatically shredding this sentence, isn't it?

That's desperately what we're trying to do because I want to be in daily or at least, you know, significant contact with the American people and communicate what I would be doing, what I think we should be doing and how we should be doing it, but I promise you that's on the way, hopefully God willing, by Monday. I will hand it to him this sounds like a Joe Biden sentence 100%. Absolutely 100%. The significant context he wants with the American people is with the hair of your teenage daughters. Uh, pardon me. Uh, you might think to yourself, hey, um, if you have a smartphone in your pocket that

was made after the year 2011, you can just be doing that now. Hmm. You can just... You can just... On Face Time. While you're texting this, you can kind of just turn the camera, the phone around. Do a TikTok. Yep, and just hold up like today's newspaper, something like that. Get a little shot. Just a picture of you with today's newspaper would be great.

Just any of that, any of that stuff, just, you know, take 30 seconds and then people, millions of people would stop asking whether you're dead. Just real quick, just a very fast proof of life, just proven you're alive. Now, you say that. Yeah, so easy for you to say that. But there are other considerations. You say that like it's really easy, but have you considered? A source with knowledge of the campaign said that Biden's team is working on scaling up that infrastructure and dealing with the realities of Biden's Wilmington home. I assume that like, I assume there are many alternate realities happening in the same home. They're having to deal with like zombies, there's pirates coming through the wall in

another one of the rooms. There's the Nazi universe. That one's always tough. There's all the Cathulus in the closet. But no, it says they're dealing with the realities of Biden's Wilmington home. Like the fact that there aren't particularly high ceilings which can make lighting a challenge. Wow. If you just had a foot more on those bad boys, you know, he would have been out there every day. And I swear to God, the minute we are done renovating this house and putting in some taller ceilings, God willing, three to six months from then, we will have a camera system in.

Look, I'm not a conspiracy theorist. Maybe Joe Biden's not dead, but realistically, he's almost certainly sick. He's always definitely on the way out. And they are not willing to actually announce this because they are so dedicated to his campaign going forward that they hope it will just blow over. Well, because, like, just as far as saying, oh yeah, but we have so much work to do in order to be able to show Joe Biden on camera addressing a like current issue that's just like so far from holding any kind of water because I think the vast majority of the people in the world know that if you have a

campaign that has had many, many, many, many, many, many millions of dollars donated to it, you can probably afford like maybe a 2017 Macbook Pro. At least. Just with a webcam on it. Yeah, and then what you've got to do is you got to open the lid of that bad boy up. You can pay someone to do that for you as well. Yep. And then you have to sit at the desk in front of it and to, and, and, and, and to, and to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the, to to the, to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho, thoo, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooome.ea, to bea, to bea, to bea, to bea, to bea, to be pa someone to do that for you as well. Yep, and then you have to sit at the desk in front of it and allow it to be pointed at you and then speak. Don't stand up, turn, and then walk out of frame as well, mid-doing that, just a little tip. I really think he is sick though, and they just don't want to announce it because how much it would affect the next primary and they're hoping to just hammer ahead with it.

Well especially because he's like, he's had like a bunch of brain tumors and brain surgeries and shit is. He's pretty old. Very old. Like Bernie's old too, but at least Bernie's like I'm staying away from everybody and just doing stuff. He's still doing those video chats. He's on the their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's th. I's th. I's thi. I's, th. I's just, thi. I's, th. I's, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, th. Like, thi. Like, thi's, thi's, thi's, thi's. Like, thi's, thi's. I'm just, thi's. I'm just, thi's, thi's, just, just, just, thi. I's like I'm staying away from everybody and just doing stuff. He's still doing stuff. He's still doing those video chats. He's on a Facebook live like every day. It's almost as though he's attempting to campaign for the nomination. I was just comfort people in a very upsetting, traumatizing, scary time, you know.

Now sometimes you do want to come with people. Sometimes not everything goes perfectly. Sometimes not everything goes right. And you just have to say a little something to the people out there. And we're going to say that now in Theo's new segment. This is the one thing we didn't want to happen. What have we got going on with you? I think...

Now I'm just going to go ahead and unmute myself. Oh, there he is. There he is. How long you've been talking for? That is the one thing you didn't want to happen. Welcome to that thing where the thing we don't want to happen happens. And that's certainly the case this week. What is time? How long ago did this occur? Several days ago,

when the Ruby Princess was one of four cruise ships that had been allowed an exemption to Australia-wide 30-day ban on foreign ships, and the authorities made the decision to allow passengers to disembark after assessing there was a very low risk of coronavirus. Can you guys guess what happened next? Hmm. I think I can. Just put your hands on your chins. Have a little stroke. Have a think. Passengers were allowed to go home on condition. They self-isolate for 14 days. Now you stay put.

You stay right back. You stay right back. You just stay. That's not what happened. Some flew on domestic flights, including in the Northern Territory. Now 18 passengers have tested positive for COVID-19. New South Wales health minister Brad Hazard said in hindsight that he would have waited for the coronavirus test results before allowing

passengers to disembark. If I had my opportunity to have my two bobs worth with the benefit of what we know now about those people I'd have said yeah. God I hate it when I'd have said, yeah, maybe we should hold them on the ship. Don't have my two Bobsworth. I wish we had given New South Wales Health Minister Bradhazard, he's two Bobbsworth. Must be very hard for New South Wales health minister Brad to really cut through the bureaucracy and say, uh, don't release the plague ship. Is this like a 40-year-old man named-on the the the the the the the th-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-old-b-old-old-old-b-old-bub-bub-bub-bub-bub-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-upon-upon-on-up-up-on-upon-upon. th ship on ship. the ship. th. th. th------------------up. th-up. th-up. th-b on th-b on th-b on th-b on th-b on th-b on th-b on th-b on ship. th-b on ship. th-wub. th-wububub-wubububbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubbubb on ship. Maybe. Maybe to really cut through the bureaucracy and say, uh, don't release the plague ship. Is this like a 40 year old man named Brad? Brad has it. Brad.

Hindside is 2020, you know? That's the year of, huh? Of the now. Yeah. 20, 20 like the vision. I got in. And then. We've got to ban cruise ships. Yeah, absolutely. The diarrhea boats of the sea. A lot of stuff's going to come back. I hope cruise ships don't.

We can just do without them. Get rid of them. They're just like a sickness incubator. Don't trust them. Yeah, some businesses should die. There is a cruise ships and Airbnb apparently is getting absolutely fucking destroyed by all this because obviously nobody's doing any form of travel. So everybody who who has listings on Airbnb is pulling them and then actually putting the apartments up for rent, you know, instead of just leaving them unoccupied for people to come through and temporarily borrow every now and then off Airbnb,

which in turn is going to hopefully massively drive down rents in popular areas. I hate it when I invest in a basic human right and then I'm hoisted on my own petard. My petard, ow! Shit. So yeah, I mean if, so we got our list going here. Coronavirus, please kill Harvey Weinstein, the cruise industry and Airbnb. Senator Rand Paul, just from the American perspective also. Has Robinie got it as well or is he just quarantine? I think he's quarantining because he was in contact with Randolph.

Oh right, okay. Last I saw a fun little bit of scuttlebut that apparently there's a big, sorry, what did you say? You did what to who? Fun little bit of Scuddlebut. Oh, some Scuttlebutt. Some Scuttlebutt to chew on. Apparently in the big room where they work, there's a big bowl of candy. Yes, a trough of jelly beans. Just getting their hands in there, rummaging around for the ones they like, oh, don't

like yellow. I'm going to go a little deeper in this ball. I've heard that that's absolutely not true, but on the other hand, it's a hundred percent true. That's weird. And if you want it to be true, it can be. That's the secret. That is the law of attraction. Well, it's the dangerous game. I think, I think unless there's anybody else that we want to wish a speedy.

Probably shouldn't be wish and death, but we're all going a bit crazy here in our houses, right? That's true. Anything we say in the next few weeks is... It doesn't count. It's not a crime. That's true. The crime pass is th is this is th is th is this is th.. This is part part part part part part part part part part part part part part part part part part part part is th. This is th. This is a th. This is a th. This is a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a that's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a the. It's a thean. It's a thean. thean. theanananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananananan. weeks is... Doesn't count. It's not a crime. That's true. The crime pass is to us. Ooh.

Never happened before. Yeah. Huh. I guess it extends to you as well. You're allowed to say things that are a bit distasteful. Just a bit, okay. You can't be stopped. Although, the crime pass does not extend to saying distasteful or rude things to any service workers, any people in supermarkets.

Anybody who is forced to work while you go out there shrieking like a wild baboon as you demand your precious toilet paper. Please don't do it. Please just be very nice to the people who have to go out there and expose themselves to probable coronavirus infection just to keep everybody going. This is society functioning. Please stop saying that it's fine to go to the pub and sit across the table from each other. Stop going to my local cafe. Well, they're all closed now.

So in Australia at least? So you can't go to them. So don't do it. Well, I think that is all we have time for this week. As always, you can go on over to Patreon.com slash Punta Vista. If you would like to support the show, show your support for us and the people who make the show and make the rest of their income through working at places like bars and cafes that are all closed now. However, outside of that we are continuing to make our bonus content free through as much

of a period as we can. We do, we do. We are just going to keep making as much content as we can for people because frankly we're all stuck inside. Just listening to podcasts and watching shows and talking to people and all that kind of shit. So yeah, if you've got five dollars that you want to throw out the show and support us, that's nice, but we also understand that a lot of people are doing it tough right now. And that's why we have freed up that content for everybody else.

So until next week, unless your name is Harvey Weinstein, keep your fucking hands clean, you know? 1.5 meters, look after yourselves. Be good to other people? I think we still want him to keep his hands clean, because we don't want him to give it to anyone else. Well, I hope that they just lock him in some kind of tank until he goes, you know? Put him in the tank! Put him in the tank. The big tank. That's it everybody. See you next week. Yeah