Boonta Vista - EPISODE 186: Beefalo beefalo Beefalo beefalo beefalo beefalo Beefalo beefalo

Episode Date: February 14, 2021

It's an almost entirely Nature Corner episode as Lucy, Theo, and Ben talk about a cow that refuses to be caught, an emu that was caught but shouldn't have been there in the first place, sturgeon crime, and a millionaire dog. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: boontavista.com/merchandise Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Hello and welcome to Buena Vista episode 186. I am Ben and I am here at Bethesda Studios, working on the Elder Scorls 6. With me is Theo, senior engineer in the prestigious and highly elite, quests about rats team. Hi, Theo. Hey, you going? You're good, how are you? Good, I'm working smart, not hard. I think need a real work-life balance. That's why I wrote the script that just randomly generates quests about rats.

At the end, it gives you a little randomly generated rat crown to put on your finger. And so far, nobody's noticed the difference from all of the very well-handwritten, well-put-together quests that we usually do here at Bethesda Studios. In the Quest About Rats team, yeah. Yeah. By the way, if you're like, just a open kind of question to you guys, if there's any sort of like beloved games franchise that we could pick up and then just totally ignore the narrative themes, the kind of tonal themes, change the gameplay, change the whole way that it's set out. Just let me know, because really big into rats and rat fucking here at Bethesda Studio. So, I was thinking maybe if Bethesda bought

the system shock franchise and then made... Oh that would be good yeah and sort of just made like a system shock but it's now a randomly generated space station and occasionally you go to a dungeon in the space station and there's two bodies in a bathtub and they're kind of hugging and there's sort of some pills next by nearby. That's called environmental storytelling. I don't know if you've heard of it. Very impressive stuff. Also with us is Lucy who is a senior engineer and the prestigious and highly elite filling dungeons with zombies or skeletons team. Hi Lucy. Hi, I'm a diversity hire. We all know that. I'm very qualified.

Very smart, but I'm only here because they needed to hire some chicks. I did notice that a change since you've come on. Some of the skeletons clearly have female pelvis. That's right. So that's the success win for... And I have reduced the size of their breasts significantly. Get those skeleton titties down to beecups. That's right. Getting those skeleton bones down to a regular chest, you know. Skeleton bones.

Skeletons be having bones. What's your issue? Sorry, I'm going to try a segue here. Andrew usually does these and it's a bit tough. Here at Bethesda, which I think their offices are in America, we're very far away from home. Here's another story about someone that was very far away from home. That's good. And here is where the theme song will play when I put it in. That's no, that's the Jeopardy song. No, that, I thought th th th th th th th th th tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, I the theme the theme the theme tho, I the theme that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, tho, that, thi, that, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. th. th. th. th. th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, th. Here, I thi, I thi, I'm, I'm, I'm, that, that, that, theeea. I'm, thea. I'm thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea, thea, thi the Jeopardy song. No, that, I thought you were doing just the theme song to the podcast, not the theme song to the Nature Corner.

Oh, okay, there we go. All right. Yeah, we've only done roughly 370 episodes of this podcast. the place I belong, Bult and Huletan Serl, Nature Corner, Rubbercraft, sniffed my d'i. Dixon, my d'i. Andrew is not here. the most delicious of all the episodes. Andrews, that's right.

People are all very confused. We're doing a BLT episode. The most delicious of all the episodes. People don't get excited about a BLT anymore. Like, I mean, I'm not saying they don't get excited about these episodes. I mean, like the sandwich. Yeah, and sort of old hat at this point. People are crazy about a nice sandwich. It's a good sandwich. It's okay. It's fine. We'll have one for lunch as a treat. There are better sandwiches out there to be. There are better sandwiches out there. Should we turn this into an episode where we list all the kinds of sandwiches that... Wait, no, have we already done that before? We would just...

We list off all the name sandwiches from... We could be a good time. Anyway, this is from KFSM TV in Fort Smith, Arkansas. 600 mile reunion, Cat from Houston area reunited with owners after being found in Northwest Arkansas. Carl, comma, the cat, comma, not Carl the cat as a title, interestingly enough, was reunited with his owner, Jason Ludlum from Bay City, Texas on Monday after being missing for four years. Oh. He had been hanging out in a neighborhood in Springdale, Arkansas nearly 600 miles away for the past year. Along with other residents in Springdale, Justin Brown has been caring for Carl all while hoping his owner would claim him.

Recently, Brown's family took Carl to Lion's Veterinary Clinic in Tonti Town, to see if he was microchipped, and sure enough, he was. What the fuck? Four years later, someone's like, uh, we'll get around to it. Fucking out. When, I think I've spoken about this on the podcast before, but, uh, the dog that I found on like the highway in Ten Sleep Wyoming, uh, I took to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to to the to the to the the on like the highway in Tensleep, Wyoming, I took to the local vet to be like, hey, I found this dog. Do you think we could try and find a toa?

And then like after being there for half an hour, I was like, oh, so did you like check if he was microchipped? And the lady was like, oh that's a good idea, I think we've got one of those things. Maybe Americans aren't, they don't have... Brains, as a function. Yeah, sorry, they don't have brains. Four years, they were just like... It's weird in Australia that like we have this system where vets are just

expected to be good and decent. And I don't know whether you can you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you can't you you you th you can't th you can't know whether you can't know whether you can't that you can't that you can't know whether you can't that you can't know whether you can't that you can't that you can't that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to with the dog outback just tapping its bones to see how much marrow are in them. Oh, it's a good marrow here. We can keep our supplies happy for another week. Did you check the market ship? Oh, yeah. Oh, it's of course. theylla.

It's probably out of charge, you know. Like, in a show, like it's always wild to me that you kind of just take a cat to the vet that you find because it's hassling your chickens. And they're like, oh yeah, yeah, we know this cat. And then they just scan the microchip, get the mobile phone number and call the person. And then, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, like, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to thi, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thi, thi, thi, the, thi., they., the the the thi., the the the thi., the the just kind of do it. It's that kind of odd though that like there aren't a lot of other professions where you would expect that sort of, they are essentially doing a public service right by doing that sort of thing where it's just kind of you find a random dog on

the street you're like well I'll take that to a vet obviously that's not part their job. No other profession. No other profession it costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs costs. It costs. It costs. they. they. they. they. they's. they's. that. they's. that. that's. they's. they's. they're that's. they're they're they're they're they're th. they're that's they're that's that's that's that that that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that's that. that. that's that. that. that's that's that's that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. paid for that. Maybe in a market cost $10,000 to ask if the cat's microchibs. Yeah, it might well be. Yeah, maybe she didn't tell me that it cost $10,000 because she realized I was from out of the country and it was like a faux par to ask that. Embarcing. Oh God, she was laughing about it with all her other veterinary friends later on. The clinic in Tontenty tante tony tony tony tony tony ton ton tunic tunic tuniclum to tell the news. He was pleasantly surprised to learn that Carl was still out there being taken care of.

Carl. I remember Carl. It's such a mild way of putting that, oh that's a bit nice, isn't it? Just days later he jumped on a plane to Arkansas to get him. Veterinarian Brand Lyon says, wherever a car was before being found in Springdale, isn't very well taken care of. It's pretty unusual, but it does happen. We've had animals six, seven years lost and found them for. That's the reason we microchip animals and hear stories like this all the time.

We got to be part of one this year so far. 2021 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20 20. We th. We to be. I'm very happy to you that in the like first month of the year one nice thing happened. It is not going to be a good year pal. Anyway, time to keep putting these boards up. It's almost sundown. As raid is about. Carl's owners have no clue how we got all the way from Texas to Northwest Arkansas, but excited to have him back. I would kill to see a movie of this. I want to know. It's already a movie.

It's called Homewood Bound. Except Carl didn't know where he was going. Like, there's basically two ways this could have played out, right? One is the exciting version, which is over the course of four years, he incrementally traveled 600 miles, you know, in sort of bits and pieces. Or it's just like someone in Houston was like, oh, that's cool cat, I'll keep it, and then drove all the way to Arkansas. Jason and his wife Angie, fed Carl as a kitten. He was raised with cats and dogs but preferred to hang out with one particular dog.

Carl used to go on walks with the dog and learned how to bark like a dog. I need to hear more about Carl. Is Carl like a cat-version of a fairy? He's gifing. Oh, never say that word on this podcast ever again. Now Carl is on a long ride home to Texas to be reunited with the rest of his family, where he will be a much-loved indoor cat. Good call. You know how you got the taste of freedom over four years?

Surprised by the fuck I get used to two rooms. I feel like after four years, that's not your cat anymore. You know? That's the world's cat. That's the world's cat. So they say that he's on a long ride home to Texas now. Are they driving him back? Because the guy flew there. What's he doing? He's like renting a car, driving a guy with a bunch of crab pots on the back of his truck. Make room one of those pots for Carl. Carl actually loves it. He loves the outdoors. He'll be fun. He'll be fun. Putting one of those dog cages on the back. It'll just bark the whole way. I want to see video of Carl barking so bad.

You can't just drop that in your article without some sort of poster video of Carl. Accompanying multimedia. Speaking of one animal that was extremely far from home, here's another animal that was extremely far from home. This is a new story from the Southern Daily Echo, emu loose on A32 to return home. Pardon? A Southampton man has described catching an emu after it was running loose on the A 32 as the weirdest day of the the the the the the of the the the the th media to to to the the the the the thi media media media media media the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to mcemi media media media media media media media media to to the the to to to to to mcum multimedia to mcum multimedia to mcum multimedia to mcum multimedia to mcum. to mcum. to mcum. to m multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia multimedia to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi multimedia thi multimedia thi multimedia thi multimedia thi multimedia the the thi media media media media media media media media media media media media media media media media media the thi-m. the most most most most the most to company-m. thi-m. thi-m. thi media media to company mcum. the man has described catching an emu after it was running loose on the A32 as the weirdest day of his life. But it looks to be a happy ending for the bird nicknamed Dave by Emergency Services. Dave. It's a good email name. This is in England. I don't know how to make this any more clear because they don't say the word.

South Ampton in England. No, and they don't have emus there. No as far as I understand you don't traditionally find emus in there. Just in that that one video of the guy. We've all seen the video right. I actually checked to see if it was the same EMU, but it's this fucking old video that pops up every now and then of some extremely English northern sounding lads in a car yelling out the window to a man in his mid-40s who is walking at EMU somewhere in England, and they're just like, what have you got an ostrich for? He's like, he's not an ostrich, he's an eM and he's an asshole. I've never seen this video this video this video this video this video this video this video this video. It this video. It this video. It is. It is this video. It is this video. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It's th. It's th. It's. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's the the the th. It's the the th. It's the the the t t t the t the t t the the t the t the th. I's the th. I's the th.'s an emu and he's an asshole. I've never seen this video. It is the best shit in the world. Unfortunately I don't believe

it's the same emu. So there are at least two pet emuits in England. Hey? Hey? What the fuck? You walk in a fucking ostrich you'd have come! It's a fucking E-bue at ya! It's an e-mute! Let's have a look at it, that's a fucking E-wue, man. This is a beaut, isn't she?

It's in a he? Oh is it? His name's Warrows. You're fucked up, you, man. You're fucked up you, mate. You're fucked up, you're fucked up, you're fucked up. Huck off! Uh, Winchester police officers warned motorists to drive slowly and keep an eye out after spotting the escape bird around 10 a.m. on Thursday morning on the A-32 near Wickham Road. A spokesperson for Hampshire Constabulary.

Mm-hmm. Not a fucking dumb place. At the time said, police are trying to engage and get the bird to safety. See, I've met EMUs. Some of my best friends are the best friends. And it's not the bird's safety that you're considering. No, it's your own. Jesus Christ. He's not trapped out there with him.

You're trapped out there with him and out there is... With the day. I don't want to put bad thoughts into people's heads, but just imagine an emu driving and speak completely into one of your eye holes. Just go right in there. It's the perfect tool for gouging out of human eye. They actually evolved that way. And they're very tall. They can get you. They're fast. Ferri and police provided an update on Twitter at 2.20pm

after successfully catching the bird. An image was released to showing the captured bird with officers at the time not knowing who owned it or where it came from. Drew Lee, a 23-year-old technician from Motorbike Dealership, Destination Triumph Solent, said, my boss came running into the shop saying, you're not going to believe this, but there's an ebu on the road outside. I wouldn't believe it even in Australia. I would have said, fuck off, that's not true. Staff at the shop worried about a road accident taking place managed to subdue the frightened

bird, which is over five foot tall and had since been made an honorary staff member. What? They do not know what they're dealing with. What is happening in England? What is the greatest honors that you could bestow that animal is saying, hey, you don't really, but in our minds, you work at this motorcycle dealership. Putting a little name tag on him. Just trying to write Dave somewhere on its neck. Just running around and knocking shit over. Trying to teach it how to take apart a motorcycle engine.

It's just... Ah! God, why are people trying to subdue an emu. Okay, I'm... Or everyone who is Australian listening to this is well aware of what we're talking about, but if you're not, just Google words, emu toe, just chuck those words into the image search for Duck Duck Go and have a look at that bad boy. It has three, there's three toes, but there's only really one to speak of, and that's

the old, that's the old letter opener he's got up front. They are just horrible creatures. They barely evolved from dinosaurs. They have scales. They've got full-on dinosaur scales from the knife-edge point on the the like front of that toe all the way up to their belly. Just very like barely, barely birds at this stage. There are there was an emu at at Bundberg's famous free zoo that's in the middle of town when I was living there. And I was terrified of it. And I was separated from it by a fence. And I would just, every time I saw it, I would be absolutely convinced it was

going to find a way to kill me. I still think it might. They're horrible base. Mr. Lee managed to restrain Dave for around an hour before police arrived on scenes. He described the dramatic scene of police transporting the bird to a local animal park with a blue light escort before its tranquilizers wore off. Oh my God. Just it's like eye snapping open like the Velociraptor at the start of Jurassic Park. Ah!

Metal gear saw it, he's got three Zs above his head. Oh fuck, he's down to one Z. Drive faster. Drew was relieved to hear that the owner had come forward. It's great news that they found where it come from, but I'd like to visit it one day. Duncan Bolton curator at Bird World in Farnam told the echo on Friday that David had come around from the sedatives describing him as a healthy, friendly bird. Why have they just asked some men around they'd be like, did you see that bird? What did you think of him? Did it look good and chill to you? He said the owner had since

got in touch after seeing media coverage of the bird and police in a flap. So that bird has safely made its way home. How would you restrain an emu? to Birdworld at Farnham? Well I don't think he lives there. I think this is just a guy they reached out to for Covet at Birdworld. I think this is a privately owned EMU, I believe. Which is nuts. This guy's just got like kicking around in his backyard. All right. Very strange.

I'm checking out what they've got at Birdworld and Farnum. That sounds really good. I bet it's like tho those sorts of places in Southeast Queensland where it's not quite a theme park you would really go to and it's not quite a zoo, but there's like Birdworld. Four or five coolish birds? You're like, oh, that is a pretty big parrot, I guess. I've never seen one of those. I always thought Birdworld was what they called a British brothel. No, I don't think that's true.

Go on down to Bird World. You get to make the birds first. This TV ads that Birdworld is running to the brothel. Oh, mate, are you lonely? We've got a spacious kids area. So I don't know if you guys remember an episode we did recently. We talked about the cow that took six months to catch. The cow that was at large for six months because they just...

They couldn't get the loose cow into the trailer because they weren't trying very hard by all accounts. I saw a story pop up where I was like, oh, it's another headline about that same cow. It's not. This is another headline about a different cow. This is from the news agency, UPI, Befallow on the loose for six months resurfaces after snowstorm. Befallow. Beefolo.

Are you saying? Is that a thing? I will allow this article to explain. Police in Connecticut said a beefelow, a hybrid of a cow and a bison that escaped from a trailer outside a slaughterhouse six months ago has been spotted in the area and appears to be doing well despite winter storms. So... I didn't know you could breed a cow and a bison.

I did not know that either. Uh, a bison are huge. That just seems like an uncomfortable arrangement. The Plymouth Police Department shared a photo on Facebook showing the beefelow, dubbed Buddy by the locals wandering the snow in the Terryville area of Plymouth. As you can see, he is doing fine, the post said, ready for dinner. That's not nice. Now, yeah, are they saying ready for our dinner or ready for its dinner? It sounds like it's called a beefelow. I'd say it's ready for their dinner. Well, Buddy escaped to August 3rd from a the terterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterterter the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their to their their their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. As their. As their. As their. As their. As their. As their. As their. As their. As their. As. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their their te. te. te. te. te. te. te. their their te. their their their their their their their'd say it's ready for their dinner. Well, Buddy escaped August 3rd from a trailer outside the Plymouth Meets Processing Facility.

He was next seen two weeks later wandering loose in Terryville. A fundraiser to save Buddy from slaughter raised enough money to secure the bovine and new home at the Critter Farm Sanctuary in Florida, but attempts to capture the beefelellow have thus far been unsuccessful. Police shared video in September showing Buddy approaching a trap, but ultimately leaving without being ensnared. Good boy. Buddy belongs to himself now. He's emancipated.

Just let a fucking Bifolo be. I really like this story because I saw it and I thought, oh wow, what a coincidence. It's another cow that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was at that was at loose that's that's a that's a that's a that's a thoom thoom thoom the thoom thoom the the the the the thoom. thoom. thoom. th. th. th. thi. the the their their their ba. their ba. their ba their ba their ba their ba. their ba. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi. I thi. I's a thi. I'm a thi. I'm a tha. I'm thaeeea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e. t. oh wow, what a coincidence. It's another cow that was at loose for six months before being captured. No, this is a cow that's been at loose for six months and the story is that they managed to get a photo of it. It's still loose. I just don't understand what's happening here. This is now multiple times where they've been like, yep, we've spotted it, we've seen it, we know where we can contain this animal. I've just put a photo of a beeflo in the in the chat there. Oh no! How do you catch it? That is that is Ochcher. That is Ochcher.

That is a that. That thing is stacked. Sorry I know this is an audio format so feel free to Google Bifelow in Duck Duck Go images. Check out that mostly son of a bitch. That that. that thi that thi th. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thi thi thi thi thi thi. Oh that tho. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, I th. Oh, I thi. Oh, I thi. Oh, I thi. Oh, I thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, ohlo in duck duck go images. Check out that mostly son of a bitch. I thought that would be hairier. Is that what all beeflo I look like? Yeah, well some of them got hair. It depends. But I think if you imagine a cow and then just take the character selector slider, slider for shoulders. And you want to put that all the way up just joke levels of shoulders. Oh there are some handsome beeflo out there. They're a nice looking nice looking animal. We're a pro-bifelo podcast. Oh oh okay they can be

hairy they can be very hairy there are a lot of variants of this. Uh... Of beefelow. Well, not a lot. I'm seeing four. Uh, domesticated cattle, beeflo, catalo and American buffalo is the spectrum you can run of buffaloness. Uh, weird. Weird. Weird creatures. Anyway, good luck to Buddy.

I wish you all to that. He does. Like, if they can survive out there and nothing bad is happening to them. Let him go. Good on him. Yeah. Let him live. There's also a different cow currently on the loose. I didn't include this story because I was like well it's basically the same thing again. Sanctuary offers home to steer that escaped slaughter in Rhode Island. The owner of a New Jersey sanctuary said a steer that escaped from a Rhode Island slaughterhouse

will be given a new permanent home if rescuers can find it. Mike Shura, head of non-profit Skyland's rescue in New Jersey said he struck a deal with the Connecticut owner of the escaped steer to have the bovine donated to the sanctuary at no cost. The steer escaped from outside the Rhode Island beef and veal slaughterhouse in Johnston last week and has been on the loose ever since. The steer was spotted several times on the day of the escape but hasn't seen it been seen in several days. Rescue say they are currently searching for the animal. They are cuddler. They are currently searching for the animal. Wurst and the stucus. The steer could survive on the loose for months if it the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the stee is is sa is. the stee issewice is issewice is is is is is is. the stee is is is is is is is is. It is is. It is is is is. It is is is. It is is is is. It is is is is. It is is is is is is is is is. It is is is is is is is is is. It is. It is is is is is. It is is is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is a. It is. It is. It istemperatures. What is going on? What is it happening? I mean, good on them. We're

obviously on the side of the cows escaping the slaughterhouses. Good Lord. They're really like jumping off that conveyor belt right at the very end there, like they know what's going on. They're screaming freedom in cow-ease. I think it's time for a cow-like like the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. their their th. their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. the. the. the. the.'s going on. They're screaming, freedom! In Coweys. I think it's time for a cow uprising, much like the film Chicken Run, you know? Yep. Or the song, Cows with Guns. No? Yes, sure. No. It is America.

Much like in the film, Ocja with all of the creatures, the big pig, hippamus things. That's right. I've got to say Birdworld at Farnham looks pretty good. Tell us, what are they got? They've got a lot of birds there, you know? There's got Terry Pratchett Owl Parliament. Oh, all right. Yeah. Did he like sponsor a wing of Birdworld? No, it's just the Terry Pratchet owl parliament pays to one of the world's most charismatic authors and creator of the Discworld universe. I think you usually sponsor two wings and a body. Anyways, what else do they have at Birdworld? They've got a lot of birds.

They have a flamingo sanctuary that looks like shit and like flamingos shouldn't live in it. The best picture they could get was like, it's a gray sky, these poor flamingos in there. Sunny, it's been in years. Imagine how fucking depressed you'd be being a flamingo in England. That's just the saddest thing I can imagine. They should not have flamingos there. They also have a rabbit and a pig.

Wow, so they're liars. They're fucking liars. Welcome to Birdworld. Come look at this pig. Come see the flightless birds. I'm gonna keep up the nature corner theme here. I've got another charming, wonderful, delightful, definitely no bad parts animal story for you here. This is from News Channel 5 in Nashville. 8 year old Border Collie named Lulu inherits 5 million dollars in owners will. It's the story of a truly pampered pet Lulu an 8 year old border collie. She was loved by... It's a good age and a good breed to have 8 million... how much?

5 million dollars. Yeah. It's a dog and a good breed to have eight million... How much? Five million dollars. Yeah. That's a dog that would actually know how to spend that money. Wouldn't waste it all on treats straight away or things of that nature. She was loved by her human and when he died, his last will in testament made Lulu a very wealthy pooch. Typically Lulu plays a watchdog outside of her Nashville home, but the truth is she can now afford to hire her own security. Lulu works the front door not because she has to, but because she wants to. Yes, she's a good girl, said Martha Burton, said Martha Burton,

the two have been together for years as the 88 year old Burton kept Lulu for her friend the dog's owner Bill Doris. He was always on the road the road the road the road the road the road the road the road the road th and th and th th th th th th th th th th th thoes thoes tho-a tho-a tho-a tho-a tho-m-mute tho-m-mute tho-mute tho-mute tho-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-m-m-l-m-m-m-m-m-m-m. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He's th. He's th. He's the. He's thelloo-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lul-lu-lul-lu-lu-lullu-lu-lullu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-lu-m-year-old Burton kept Lulu for her friend, the dog's owner, Bill Doris. He was always on the road and Doris wanted Lulu well cared for when he was gone. Well, he always left the dog for me to take care of, said Burton. Then late last year, the 84-year-old Doris, an unmarried, successful businessman, died. His will named Lulu and left her money enough to pay for more kibble than any dog could possibly imagine. Oh yes, he loved that dog, said Burton. Exactly how much did Doris leave? The Will reads, $5 million will be transferred to a trust to be formed upon my death for the care of my boarder Collie Lulu.

I don't really know what to think about it to tell you the truth. He just really really love the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho you the truth, he just really loved the dog, Burton said. Will specifies the trust is to provide for all the needs of Lulu. The dog will remain in possession of Martha Burton. So is it just her money now? Why, so they do actually go into a little more detail here. The estate is currently in probate, it's not exactly clear how much it's worth, but Friends of Doris say he had vast real estate holdings and investments. Burton doesn't know anything that all about that. What she does know is that Lila was happy and loved.

There are no plans to buy a solid dog bowl or diamond crusta collar. The will states that Burton will simply be reimbursed for reasonable monthly expenses. She knows there's no way they could ever spend 5 million dollars, but Burton says, their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, is their, is their, is their, is their, is their, is, is, is, is their, is, is, is, is, is, is th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is th. th. th. th. th. th. their, is their, is their, is their, is th is th is thi. thi, is thi, is thi. thi. thi. thei. thei. thei. thei. thei. thei. thi. thi, is thi, is thi, way they could ever spend $5 million, but Burton says, with a smile, well, I'd like to try. The trust will be handled by a conservator who will approve and reimburse Burton for expenses to care for Lulu. So the dog has a representative saying what money that the dog can spend on the dog. the human woman can spend on the dog. Give her a little walking around money. It's not clear what will happen to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the th th th th th th th the the th the th the the the the thus thus thus thus the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the trust the trust the trust the trust the trust the trust the trust the trust the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thu thu thu thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thrue trus. trusts trusts trusts trusts trusts.usususus.us.us. I wills trusts trusts wills wills will trusts will trusts will thus. the thus. the human woman can spend on the dog. Yeah, give her a little walking around money. Just a little bit off the top.

It's not clear what will happen to any money left to the trust when Lulu, who is eight years old, someday passes away. So that's a nice story about an old man who just really loved his dog, right? Is it? I don't know if it's a nice story. I'd be killing that dog. Oh my god, what the fuck is wrong with you? A dog doesn't need five million dollars? We're in a pandemic, fucking hell. Fuck you, Lulu. Well, you might actually be kind of spot-on having some misgivings about Bill Doris. Let me read it. He chose to, chose to give his money to a dog instead of helping people. Here's the final paragraph of this article. If you recognize the name Bill Doris, he's been in the news as the owner to the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the owner the the the th. the the tho-fundem tho-fundem, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking h' th. F-fundic, fucking hell, fucking hell, fucking hell, fuck to hell, fuck to hell, fuck to hell, fuck to hell, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck to hell, fuck to hell, fuck the final paragraph of this article. If you recognize the name Bill Doris, he's been in the news as the owner of a property along Interstate 65

with the controversial statue of Nathan Bedford Forest. The future of that statue will also be determined in probate court. You guys have probably seen a photo of this statue before. Just get you scroll down to that point in document. I didn't know who this was. It's the funny guy on the horse. It's the funny man on a horse, right? Do you still got duck-duck go open. Yeah, could someone describe this? Lucy would have a bash of that?

It's just, it's a silver man with the most hilarious facial expression, riding a ghoes and holding a gun. We're going to read you a couple of paragraphs here from Canadian newspaper, The National Post. The forest statue bordering I-65 just south of Nashville is 25 feet tall. It depicts the general atop a golden steed with beady blue eyes and pistol in hand. As a work of public art, it is gearishly cartoonish. The sculptor, Jack Kershaw was an amateur artist and a full-time attorney

whose most famous client, James Elray, gunned down Martin Luther King Jr. in Memphis. What the fauk? The statue was erected in 1998 and sits on 3.5 acres of privately owned land. Cursure, now dead, once said in relation to it, somebody has to say something good about slavery. What? Its current owner, Bill Doris, made his money manufacturing bathtubs for the elderly. What?

He cuts the grass on the property. Make sure the array of Confederate flags surrounding the statue look crisp and smart. And that the floodlights illuminating Forrest stay lit at night. Doris has received death threats because of the statue. The statue has been shot at, but the 80-year-old won't take it down. Nor is he willing to concede that Forrest, a slaveholder, was racist, or that his military brilliance and bravery as a cavalry man, shouldn't obscure the fact that he was fighting to preserve slavery and became a significant player-sf KKK. Oh my goodness. I'm not taking that

statue down, Doris says in a phone call from his Nashville area home. That property is land that Nathan Bedford Forest occupied during the War of Northern Aggression. You know what the War of Northern Aggression is sometimes mistakenly called the Civil War. The War of Northern aggression. Slavery was never an issue. Nathan Bedford Forest was not a racist. Oh boy. I didn't know any of this about that statue.

What a fucking world! I was just like, oh, he's leaving money to a dog. Oh, it's so much. Okay so the if it was the Confederate statue and that's that it would all have made sense. Mm-hmm. How can this possibly... Yep. Yep. You know how it says that he made his money manufacturing bathtubs? Yep. Yep. Yeah. You know how it says that he made his money manufacturing bathtubs. For the elderly. Yeah, for the elderly. Incidentally, this statue I believe was made out of leftover metal from bath tubs that was given to him by Bill Duras. Ha! It's just, it's the worst looking statue in the world.

If you have not duck. Go images, this image at this point, please do. Just I-65, forest statue should get you there. Holy fuck. I for one think the statue rules, but I have a hard time separating the art from the artist. Yeah, I mean it objectively rules the way that it looks, but um... It's extremely stupid. I did not realize that it was 25 feet tall.

25 feet tall. It's really big. It's enormous. Oh, fuck me. I just love the idea that he's got illuminated at night with the Confederate flags all around. Oh, you've absolutely got to see it. Fuck me. So this, for stupidity, and I think this is unintentional stupidity, this reminds me of an incredible statue that we just happened upon when we were like just

completely blindly walking the streets of Prague. I wish I could work out how to copy an image on Google images, but I think the technology doesn't exist yet. One second. We'll have to edit around this because I'll definitely edit this out. Yeah, for sure. Thank you. Yeah. You're not in that down in your time journal?

Yeah, time journal. If I could say even uploading, who cares? All right. Cool. Good story. Yep. It's a dude on a upside down horse. Oh, I love that statue.

I've got to see that statue. It's good. I like it. I too have been to Praga. Is that how they say it? Mmm, yep. Yep. Never been to Europe. Not interested. You've never been to Budapest? I've never been to Budapest. No. Theo, have you been to Budapest? No, I haven't been to Budapest. Except when being transported there through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through through ed there through the magic of music with the

late 1990s, early 2000s, Pain of Salvation, Prog Metal Epic. Fuck, I can't even remember it. Remedy Lane, there you go. I saw Pain of Salvation open for Dream Theater. Of course you did. And it was the literally the worst concert of my entire life. Yes. Yes. A friend of mine had a spare ticket and was like, hey, do you want to come see Dream Theater?

And I said, oh, fuck it, why not? I drove down from the sunny coast to Brisbane to see Pain of Salvation and Dream Theater, and it was the fucking worst. It was the most boring shit I've ever had to sit through in my entire life. I love how a dream theater do that thing where they're like, all right, enough fucking around. Here's a catchy riff. Just kidding, we're doing it for four seconds.

Now we're off into noodling again. Yeah, now it's time for the keyboard solo. This one's a little ragtime piece. Shut the fuck up. Stop doing that. You had a good riff going. Just play the riff. Speaking of professionals not doing the job they're supposed to do, here's a story from the Associated Press.

Wisconsin biologists charge with lying about caviar scheme. So far so good. Sent into us by biologist of the show, no, marine biologist of the show, Jesse, thank you so much. I don't know what you know about terrestrial animals. Prosecutors charged the Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources' top sturgeon expert Thursday with obstructing an investigation into allegations that his employees have been funneling the valuable fish's eggs to a network of caviar processes under the guise of a scientific study. Wonderful. Now that's one sentence. No notes. Yeah. How good would it be to be recognized as the top sturgeon expert in your department? It would be good but it's a long way to fall.

I'm sure there's hundreds of rungs in the scurgeed expertise study study. expert in your department. It would be good, but it's a long way to fall. I'm sure there's hundreds of rungs in the sturgeon expertise ladder in the Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources. Ryan Koenig's faces one count of obstructing a conservation warden, which is a misdemeanor punishable by up to nine months in jail and $10,000 in fines. Online court records did not list an attorney for him. Good sign. DNR spokeswoman Sarah Hoy said Koenig's was placed on administrative leave Thursday but declined further comment. He could be the first of many to be charged in what investigators

alleged was a wide-ranging scheme involving multiple DNR employees and caviar processes. Wow, this is a big caviar scheme. Hey. I'm going to say this is probably my first sort of wildlife department caviar scheme that I've ever heard of. Yeah, probably same. But I mean it's probably rampant, I bet. Sturgeon a bony fish that can grow as large as 12 feet long. Too big. That is too big for a fish. And their eggs are highly calvited as caviar.

Wisconsin, which prides itself on outdoor tradition, such as hunting and fishing, holds a sturgeon spearing season every February on the Lake Wittabago system near Oshkosh, about 90 miles northwest of Milwaukee. This year's season is set to begin on Saturday. According to the criminal complaint, Konegs has served as the DNR's top sturgeon biologist since 2012 and is the lead coordinator for the department's spearing season, which is held every February on the Lake Wittabago system. He oversees the roughly 60 DNR workers who staff registration stations during the season. That's a lot. That's a lot of people got out there and spearing sturgeon.

That sounds so fun. The DNR and the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service began a joint investigation in 2017 into allegations that DNR workers had been illegally selling or trading sturgeon caviar in violation of state and federal law. So good. Just imagine, like, some plucky investigator going to his boss and being like, they're selling it as caviar. We got him.

The investigation culminated in January 2020 and uncovered multiple people who are illegally selling, purchasing bartering or trading sturgeon eggs. The complaint states. Fucking hell. Bartering with sturgeon eggs. So good. You like, the complaint states. Battering with sturgeon eggs. So good. You're like going into a bar in town and being like, oh, just a round of beers, thanks. He's, um, this sliding some sturgeon eggs across the table.

Seven million eggs. Do that cover it? Will this be enough? Keep the change? He leaves 2 million sturgeon eggs on the counter and he takes one off every time the surface is bad. Whole town's running on sturgeon economy. Investigators interviewed Koenig's in January 2020. He told them that DNR registration workers

collect eggs as part of a fertility study. If a Spirer wants the eggs back, the workers won't collect them, or they will turn them after they've been studied, Koenig said. Investigators asked him why workers at a registration station were putting eggs in a cooler marked for a caviar processor. It's just a big Eski that says for caviar. For crime. This is the fishball version of just like putting all of your money in a big bag with triple X written on a big dollar science. Oh damn.

Kerning said he didn't know the processor that staff shouldn't be taking custody of eggs and that he didn't know the processor kept a cooler at the station. He said he had never called the processor. When the investigators showed him phone records confirming that Kernings had in fact done so in May 2018, he said he didn't know what he and the processor discussed, but that he was sure it wasn't sturgeon egg processing facility about something completely different. Probably the football.

Did you catch the game? Oh boy, get a lawyer, sir. Yeah, please don't represent yourself. This is not going to go well. He insisted he didn't know that any DNR workers were collecting eggs and giving them to members of the public who weren't involved in department research. He added, however, that if a spirger works works works works works works works to a processor as part of the research, DNR workers will do so, and that processors sometimes thank DNR staffers with jars of caviar. It's a gift. It's a gift. It's a gift.

Investigators interviewed Kendall Kamki, a DNR fishery supervisor the same day. He said he was guilty of taking eggs to a processor hereR fishery supervisor, the same day. He said he was guilty of taking eggs to a processor here and there, and the processors would give him jars of caviar in return. One processor gave him moonshide, he said. As well as classic sturgeon eggs for moonshide corruption scenarios. Why is this all on the butt? Like, this is something that must happen just continually. They have an entire barter system set up for it, like the fucking John Wick coins, but way

grosser. You've got this one horrible, sticky-ass egg. Everything is one jar of caviar. That's... Investigators also uncovered official DNR logs showing that caviar was going to a processor according to the complaint. A former DNR fishery supervisor named Ronald Brooke told staff, told them staff had received caviar from processes for years and ate it at meetings. Two processes told investigators that staff would give them eggs. One of them

said he made 65 pounds of caviar out of them in 2015. He and Koenigs were both nervous about the arrangement because it was prohibited, he said. A DNR Sturgeon registration employee told them that one year they threw out all the eggs because wardens were asking too many questions about them. Ditch the eggs because wardens were asking too many questions about them. Ditch the eggs! It's a flushing caviar down the toilet. Come on, come on, the fence are here. Oh, scientists are so stupid. This is amazing. Investigators searched at Konyx home in June and sees his DNR issued phone.

They discovered it had been erased in April four months after they interviewed him and reset without the department's permission. Mr. Raising all his caviar texts. Too many incriminating texts about how nice the caviar he just had was. Last week, Kodak's to the investigators that his staff were indeed taking eggs from five to six sturgeon to processes annually after research rather than than than than than than them away. He also said he accepted 20 to 30 jars of caviar annually from processes and dispersed it to as many as a dozen co-workers for their personal use. According to the complaint. How are they using it? I mean, put it on a biscuit, I don't know. How do they, how do they like come across this ring in the first place anyway?

But is there just someone going around checking sturgeon holes? Uh, yeah, another sturgeon hole, completely empty. Right. Yeah, this, maybe there was a whistleblower, it's hard to say. There's a snitch. There's a snitch. There's a snitch. There's a sturgent snitch. Just take your caviar and shut up. Um, Kearning's false statements added hundreds of hours to an investigation. They could have been dramatically shortened had he told investigators the truth, the complaint said. Well, he would have gotten away with it.

It's so harmless? And all of the phone records and... Is it, I mean, come on, who are you hurting with your caviar stealing? Just the sturgeon. I don't know if this is just like something that he said to, because you know he was charged with a crime, but the fact that they were doing it rather than throwing it away, if that's true, let him keep the caha, the cave, the cave, the cave, the cave, the ca, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thrown, thrown, thi, thi, thrown, thrown, thi, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr, thr, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, thrown, thrown, iar. Also the fact that they don't seem to be profiting from this so much as just getting huge jars of delicious caviar to eat. Like and they're suffering some sort of like caviar madness that they would just be eating caviar at a meeting or whatever just big spoonfuls of the of the stuff. It kind of reminds me of the British expedition that was supposed to bring home a bunch of turtles, but they found

out the turtles were super delicious and they couldn't stop making turtle soup from them and ended up bringing no turtles home because they were literally unable to stop themselves from continuing to eat the turtles. I hate it when that happens. Too many turtles. It's turtles all the way down. So that was a story about people breaking some laws, but here's a story about people making some laws.

It's time of course for Oman's importance. And this is probably where the theme for that would be. Wonderful. Do you want to hum it, Theo? Yeah, perfect. That's the one. You shall see hail fall from a clear sky and burn his fire upon the ground. You shall see darkness cover Egypt when the sun climbs high to noon. And you shall know

that God is God and bow down to his will." From the Associated Press Nevada Bill would allow tech companies to create governments. Don't do that. Don't. Don't. I probably don't do that one. Please. We don't need to read the story. It's not good. Yeah, that's a big no from us. Holy fuck no. Please know. We are going to read the story though because it gets worse. Plans legislation to establish new business areas in Nevada would allow technology companies to effectively form separate local governments. Don't do that. Democratic Governor Steve Sissillac. Don't know if I'm saying that right, announced a plan to launch so-called innovation zones in Nevada to jumpstart the state's economy

by attracting technology firms. Las Vegas Review General reported Wednesday. Fucking hell. The zones would permit companies with large areas of land to form governments carrying the same authority as counties, including the ability to impose taxes, form school districts and courts, and provide government services. Stop! Don't do this! Just don't! We've already tried this! Stop! Airbnb LLC District Court. That'd be great. Company script, it's just fucking Amazon vouchers. Oh my god. Yeah, I mean that's what it's going to be, right? Like, Amazon will open a fulfillment center that is like, yeah. The measure to further economic development with the, quote, alternative form of local government has not yet been introduced in the legislature.

Sislik pitched the concept in his State of the State address delivered January 19th. The plan would bring in new businesses at the forefront of quote, groundbreaking technologies without the use of tax abatements or other publicly funded incentive packages that previously helped Nevada attract companies like Tesla. So they're saying no tax incentives, but we will let you make your own laws. And what kind of fucking ground-breaking technologies? Like this like this like this like this like this like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus like thus. So like their their their their their their their their their their their their. So, their their. their. their. their. A their. A their. A. A. A. A. A. A. A their. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. their. their. their their their their plan. what kind of ground-branking technology is like this is 100% just going to be ending up like them building a whole bunch of server farms for Bitcoin. Yeah, and then making sure that the people who live there don't have any form of currency they can use anywhere else outside of the server farm county.

Now this is fun coin and it can be spent anywhere within our county. Wink! Is this like named Blockchains LLC as a company that he committed to developing a smart city in an area east of Reno after the legislation has passed, you know that he got that one for it. This is a made-up sentence. Blockchains LLC, Smart City. Yep. Like if you had written this into say Cyberpunk 2077 people would have been like,

shut the fuck up. We all did. We all died in 9-11. None of this is real. We are experiencing brain death in a tank somewhere. And at least we can be kind of just a little bit satisfied in the fact that nothing in this city will work. If you have to like, if you press a button on the pedestrian crossing, which I think is very generous of me to imagine that there will be pedestrian crossings in such a place. And then a signal gets sent and a coal mine has to burn four tons of CO,

like of coal, producing, you know, CO2 and all the sort of stuff to decide whether or not the traffic lights should change. But it's a decentralized, trustless system. So it's got that going for it. Just imagine being like, whatever services you had to, you know, your local, fucking DMV or whatever, and then just being like, oh, no, it looks like you were trying to go on your break at work, you don't have enough time. Go back to work. Like, this is just going to be fucking... The draft proposal said the traditional local government model is, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, tha, tha, tha, tha, thiiiiol, thiol, thiol, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.a.a. And, their, thi, thi, th is just going to be fucking... The draft proposal said the traditional local government model is, quote, inadequate alone to provide the resources to make Nevada a leader in attracting and retaining businesses and fostering economic development in emerging technologies and industries.

The governor's office of economic development would oversee applications for the zones, which would be limited to companies working in specific business areas, including, and get ready for this. Fuck off. Fuck off. I hate it. Blockchain, autonomous technology, the internet of things, the internet of things, roboctiolics and renewable resource technology. Of those things, only one is real. Yes. Yep. Imagine how good the internet of things one would be though. Welcome to Internet of Things, thi. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, th. F, tho. F, tho, I, I, I tho, I tho, thi. F, fuck, fuck, fuck, fc. F, fc. F, fc. F, fc. F, fc. F, fc. F, f-f, f. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. thc. thc. thc. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. tho. tho. F. F. F. Imagine how good the Internet of Things one would be though. Welcome to Internet of Things, Phil. Nothing works and it never will.

Zone requirements would include applicants owning at least 78 square miles of undeveloped un-inhabited land within a single county but separate from any city, town or tax increment area. Companies would have had at least $250 million in plans to invest additional $1 billion in their zones over 10 years. The zones would initially operate with the oversight of their location counties, but would eventually take over county duties and become independent governmental bodies. This is hell that we're in. The zones would have three member supervisor boards with the same power as county commissioners.

The businesses would maintain significant control over board membership. That's what you want. It seems, this is fucking insane, right? This is a fucking bat shit crazy. It's so on the nose. It's just... Like who wants this? Is it libertarians? It must be, surely.

I love opening the book Neuromancer and reading it and then putting it down and going, well that all seemed good. That sounds good to me. Well this was quite cool, aesthetically very pleasing. So therefore, it must make life nice. Highest per capita use of leather jackets though, so that's nice. With like one arm cut off. Highest per capita use of leather jackets though, so that's nice. Like one arm cut off.

Well, look, that sounds very grim and it looks like the future is going to be particularly shit. But in some good news, we might not be traveling forwards in time. This is a story from the age. Experiment to, sorry, I need to apologize in advance, because this is written in a very florid style that is very silly, but the substance of it is good, I promise. From the age, experiment to test the nature of the universe set up just in time. Associate Professor Eric Streed says the irony is not lost on him that he was racing the clock to make it home on time after setting up an experiment that could upend what we know about the nature of time itself.

The Griffith University experimental physicist had just set up an experiment to test the cutting edge quantum theory of time of Australia's only nuclear reactor at Lucas Heights in Sydney. I went down in mid-December in the very narrow window of time when people from Queensland were able to go down, Professor Street said. I had been planning to spend a few days in Sydney with my wife, but then the northern beaches cluster happened so we had to hightail it back over the border. We made it with about eight hours to spare. Having set up the experiment, Professor Street now has all the time of the theory which proposes that time works differently than we had supposed. The quantum theory of time has been put forward by Professor Joan Vicaro was also based

at Griffith after about a decade's work. Current scientific understanding supposes that we think of that what we think of a time flows in one direction, from less to greater entropy as a fundamental feature of the universe. Professor Vicaro's theory suggests that time can instead move in either direction and we only observe it moving in one direction. Now that might be a bit confusing. So I'll just read you this next sentence here. She likens it to the wind blowing the leaves on a tree. You can see the leaves moving but you don't assume they cause the wind to blow through them.

Pardon? I'm gonna... She likens it to the wind blowing the leaves on a tree. You can see the leaves moving, but you don't assume they cause the wind to blow through them. Uh-huh. Yeah, so I think that clears it up. If correct, the theory would be revolutionary because it would change our understanding of their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theory is is is is is.e, the the the the theory is.eoeoeoeoeoingeoingeoingeoingeoingeoingevolsheaueuewshowshaves., is is is is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theory is is is is is is is is.eoeseoeseoes.eoeoeoes.eoeoes.eoeoeoeoes.eoes.eoomeoes willeoomeoeseses.eoeoeslues theoryory is.eoeoeoveseoeoeoeseslueseoes willeoes willeoes will some fundamental laws of the universe, in particular the conservation of mass. Theory is backed up with extensive equations, fantastic, but it needs to be tested, which is where Professor Streed comes in.

I'm clear on what the theory is. The practical side of the theory is that if you have an area with a large amount of neutrinos like that generated by a nuclear reactor that time could move differently, he said. The the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. Tors is th. T. T. T. thi is thi is thi is thi is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theory is theory is theory is theory is theory is theory is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the is is is is is is the is the is the is the is thi is thi is the is back is back is back is back is thooooes.oes.ooesc.oesonoesonoesonoesonoesonoesonoesonoesoesonoesoesoesoesoesoesoesoesoes.oes.oes. the the the the the the theory is that if you have an area with a large amount of neutrinos like that generated by a nuclear reactor that time could move differently he said. The sun is a good source of neutrinos but he can't turn it on or, sorry, on or off so a nuclear reactor is our fallback option. Not with that attitude. The clocks have been provided by the National Measurement Institute and include a range of atomic clothat give accurate measurements over different time frames. If discrepancies can be found between the passage of time at different points around the reactor, it will suggest the neutrinos are causing a dilation effect.

That would indicate the theory is correct, Professor Street said, although there would still be work to do. If the effect is occurring at the reactor level, we would need to validate other nuclear reactors and then look for the effect in other places like planetary orbital data. Over the course of the 20th century there's been several experiments done where the scientists got results that made them scratch their heads, but there weren't good explanations for why they turned out the way they did. This experiment is right on the edge of what's possible and it's a testament to the that big swing. Now Theo, can you please explain this to us? Okay, so my, the thing about experiments with neutrinos are is that they sound like the coolest shit ever and you can do exactly nothing with any of it. They have to usually set shit up in like a cave underground because neutrinos are a very, very flighty little little fellas, kind of like a cave underground because neutrinos are very, very flighty little, little

fellas, kind of like a, kind of like little Theos flying through the air. And just like little Theos, they have very little agency and they can't change a thing. So it's very, very difficult to get good results out of them. So I think he's saying that when you've got a lot of neutrinos, that little bits of time can do different things than just travels straight forwards, but... Mm-hmm. It's... Yep. I don't think that anything's ever going to come of this. What's just about breaking the conservation of mass? That sounds bad.

Well, sure, it sounds bad. And it would be bad, I guess. But if anything ever came of it, which it won't. Like everything else measuring neutrinos passing through stuff, it's it's always like what we found very very tiny slight perturbations of the universe that we can't use for anything and the only way we can see it is because neutrinos move very slightly differently at two stations 400 kilometers away from each other.

So that's fun. I bet. They set it up as like being able to time travel. And we're all just getting older and closer to death. I'm not. That's true. I bet it would be useful for quantum computers somehow. Oh yeah, yep.

That thing that I've been told, the thing that exists. Right around the corner for the last two decades. What's going on with that? I love getting questions about quantum computers, the things that are right around the corner for last two decades. Yeah. From like very, same thing, falls in the same bucket as blockchain where someone in like a senior management will go, hey, we should throw out all of our technology and just run it on quantum computers. That's a great idea. I know that's gonna be, you know,

I don't really know anything about, but that's where you guys come in. The boffins, the eggheads, to make it happen. I hear those computers are gonna be zippy as hell. And they're just right around the corner the corner the corner the corner the're just right around the corner. So enjoy that. I know, we're going to look very foolish when this episode comes out and you're listening to it on your little handheld quantum computer. Actually, it will look like huge assholes that know nothing about anything.

You know how we did that, uh, the story about the brain implants flashing lights into people's brains. Oh, we did look like huge assholes that know nothing about anything, that's right. And that's the only time that this has happened. Oh, are we wrong about them? Well, I mean, all of us read that story and were like, wait, this guy's improving the designs of them? Like, they already exist. That's the crazy shit I've ever heard. And then, like, three people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people people. That's, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's, that's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. That's. that's. that's. that's. that, that, that's, that, that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, my mom has one of those. What the fuck? Yeah, yeah, they, so a bunch of people got in contact with us to say, yeah, I've got a relative with this, um, they've got, um,

reasonably advanced, um, Parkinson's, I believe, is that? Well, now he looks like assholes, don't we? We do. We already did, and now it's getting worse. And they just like when they're having a bad time they bring up their phone, they press a couple of buttons, they set it to the cool setting and come good for a bit and and drastically like improve their quality of life. So check out getting brain implants. That's fucking wild. If you're not feeling great. I'm not a particularly widely read person. I don't pretend to be up with the latest and greatest in technological developments. But I just, how did this happen? And I didn't hear about it at all. No one told us. No one was like standing on a street to be like, oh, Mr. We've invented brain implants. Get the guys on the street. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thr-I. thrown. thrown. th. th. thin. the the the thin. the the the the the th. the the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. tode. toda. te. te. toda. t. toda. the. the. the. the. the. the their. their. the guys on the current affair out there.

Like, you know, we're talking to people on the street that have brain implants, and they say it drastically improves their life. Like, just nothing. Now, where? And I feel like a lot of it is because it's hard to start it. It's hard to pick out in the media the stories that actually describe real and functional improvements that people are actually thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing the stories that actually describe real and functional improvements that people are actually performing versus people running neutrinos through a bunch of detectors and finding that they're, you know, 20 nanoseconds later than

they expected to be or something like that. Yeah, I think there's a real problem with science writing where, and I mean this is true of like most digital journalism, that you know everyone's just trying to get as much traffic as they possibly can. So these stories, particularly from like science journalists that are writing up from press releases from universities, will try and find the like spiciest possible on something, which means inflating things that are not super significant discoveries into making them sound as exciting as possible. So you get flooded with all these stories where things sound fucking incredible but you

kind of like I mean that's not really a thing right like they're probably not going to see that for a while and then what happens is that we read a story about mice with brain implants and we go tish-push-shore and we go Tish-Pershaw, that ain't useful for shit. And then someone tells us, this is saving my mom's life and I'm like, ah, fuck. And don't take this as an open opportunity to correct us. We hate being corrected and we never want to find out. We hate it. Please don't tell us. Well, that's probably all we've got time for this week. Thanks very much for joining us. It is still

freemium free brewery. So bonus episodes are free for this month. Initially we did this because, well last year we did it because of COVID-19 and COVID-19 is done as far as I understand it. It's finished so I don't ever have to think about it again. So now we're just doing it because we can and and it's fun. And if you like the bonus episodes, you can get those on Patreon outside of February. I forgot that we did a free month get the start of the pandemic and that was that was a long time ago. I think we did it for like two or three months and then stopped doing it. We're still here. Yeah. And before we go, should we just close out with a little dispatch from Andrew who's building a fence currently. He's fencing. We all agreed to podcast and then he woke up and went, I'm building a fence. Yeah, I just kind of thought when he said,

we'll do it early before I start doing it early. He'd specify a time. Yeah, he'd maybe say what time you wanted to start. Yeah, kind of running out of ti ti ti ti ti ti ti to to to to to to th to to th th to to to to to th th time time time time time time time time time to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to just just to just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just to to to th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, tho, tho, tho. Yeah, thooooooooooo. Yeah, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to specify a time. Yeah, he'd maybe say what time you want to start. Yeah, kind of running out of time this morning if you want to do it in the next hour or so, you know, you need to get started. It's so important. Anyway, we haven't worked that out yet. But hand in a hole at the monkey enclosure and got shocked by the fence. Oh no. So, you hate to see it. It shouldn't do that. No, it shouldn't do that. That's not a thing that should happen.

It really shouldn't do that. But also I think very much in character for children of this podcast. So. I don't blame Evie I think no yeah you see a hole in the in the monkey enclosure you can you can like interact with those monkeys you can put your hand in there and oh apparently you shouldn't probably shouldn't probably shouldn't I would be more worried about the monkey the monkey but I've been putting my hand in that monkey hole for years I never got shocked by they we like the shock the shock tho that that's that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the that's the the the that's the the the that's the the that the the the the the that that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho tho thooooooooooooooooo thoooooooo they the they. thooooooo the the the the the never got shocked. Back and by the day we like the shock.

All right, that's it for Buck to us. We will see you next week. Bye. Goodbye. you