Boonta Vista - EPISODE 189: From Your Mouth To That Locust's Ear

Episode Date: March 7, 2021

Everyone's here as we speed down the interstate using a crossbow to shoot the vaccine into unsuspecting Texans. This week: fronting court while arm-deep in a patient, ominous and portentous use of a dead locust's ear, and after a long hiatus it's the return of Australia's favourite fabulist. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Welcome to Buntavista, episode 189. My name is Andrew and I'm here in a hospital overseeing a vaccine program. Now why do they put me in charge what you might ask? Don't know. They could give the money to some public institutions, but instead they've been trying to find any kind of private partner they can and apparently this includes podcasters. Just over here to my left, fumbling around holding the vials in his hands, letting them warm up, trying to read the label of each one individually, and then just kind of sticking himself

with a needle occasionally, it's been.'s it going? I'm doing great I'm not getting this virus. No that's true I've had like 27 shots of the vaccine at this point and I'm feeling very strong like getting stronger with each one would you say? I think so? Like I feel sick like I feel sick but you are glowing think so. Like I feel sick. But you are glowing. Physically very, very bad. But I feel like that is a sign of strength. The more sick I am, the more the vaccine is working, therefore the more immune I will be to novel coronavirus. Imagine, so if you get two shots and that adds up to you being, what it like a hundred percent immune or like 90 90 something? Yeah we're doctors and you should definitely that that sounds correct yes. So yeah like if you if you keep layering them on you're

gonna become you know 200 250 500 percent immune at this point I am 1,350 percent immune to novel coronavirus. That is great news. Huh. And just across the other side of the room, furtively stuffing as many of the vials as she can into her purse, it's Lucy. Ah, Mamma Mia, you got me. The Italian bandit here to steal your AstraZeneca.

Replacing it all with dry spaghetti noodles. Oh no. This is a brilliant character work here. The prop you were given was you stealing files. Immediately Italian. It's right. It's something from the news. It's timely.

It's from the news. That's how you do comedy, baby. Oh yeah, I forgot about. That's right. By the time this podcast comes out, no one will remember what's going on. The nation of Italy will have gifted us one billion coronavirus shots. There's like somebody at a dock, you know, it's like a bit of an official ceremony and they're just about to sign the final form and give over access to all the shipping containers full of it and just out of somebody's phone they're gonna hear, mama mea, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on a second. What's a dead of noise? Oh, you offend me. Pack up the ship.

And then they're gone again and we have no more vaccine. Pack up the ship? Pack up the ship? Well I haven't actually unpacked the ship yet. Put it a petrol into the ship. Buy some donuts, maybe potato chips. We're a sailor at dawn. I'm gonna get hungry on this both ride. Oh boy. And just in the other corner of this room, I should note there is a long line forming outside and people are getting agitated, but just the opposite corner of the room, with his back to us, you know, for obvious reasons. The obvious reason is we can still kind of see that the opposite corner of the room with his back to us, you know, for obvious reasons. The obvious reason is we can still kind of see that Theo has the lid off one of the vials

and he's just trying to have a little sip. Just a little taste, a little taseer, I don't want the whole thing. What do you reckon it tasks like, it is. I think it tastes like Mountain Dew code red. And if it doesn't, they should make it. They should. Would you let anybody inject something into you if it was the color of mountain dew, the color of naked mountain dew, you know? Yes.

I think there should be two colors for things. Red for stuff that comes out of you and then bright green for anything that goes in and that way they won't mix up the vials. You guys have seen a vitamin B12 shot? I have to get those and they're very bright. Hold on how bright? What color? We're talking like fluorogreen and it makes your pee like fluorescent yellow for a while. That's what, every time, every time I have like a Barocca, yeah, that's the same shit. And then, uh, and then, you know, eight hours later or whatever, I am pissing and going, wow, have I never seen water in my life? And then I go, oh yeah, oh yeah. Exactly. It's not meant to be that color. Definitely had that with eating, once as a teen, eating like several whole roast beetroot. What? Why were you doing this?

It was on the table. You know how teens be always eating large servings of be the tea. I'm sorry for eating delicious roast vegetables. I had exactly this happened to me this week, but I'm 30. Yeah, and then you piss and you're like, oh no, one of my internal organs has ruptured and I'm bleeding to death on the inside. And then you go to your mother and say, Mommy, there's a problem.

Mommy, I'm bleeding out of my piss up. Problem in my pee-pee. Yep. And she says, don't worry, me and your father have already had this entire conversation this morning. And that's something fun you can pass on to your children. Yeah. So, um, so on the vaccine thing, right, I said to Elder last night, now I wouldn't, I wouldn't say this in public. I wouldn't put this out there online. Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. Or to an audience of however many we have. Several. to 10. Audience of several. A plurality of listeners. But here we go anyway. So you know how we have the dastardly Italians stealing our precious vaccines, right?

Mm-hmm. And people are mad about it. Yeah. And they're going to use it in their pasta sauce. The best distribution method is that is the great big dish of pasta sauce that they make for like a Guinness World Record. You're using the Astra Zedicate vaccine to de-glaze the pan to make my delicious spoling eyes.

So Australians are mad about it and we also like to get mad about other things like, like, oh, when am I getting my vaccination? And they said the vaccination would be rolling out already and it should be done by now. We should be clever enough to have it all dumb by now. And like, is it extremely dumb of me to be like, I don't really mind? Because we live in a country where luckily like coronavirus is not running absolutely roughshod over the absolutely 100% like we shouldn't we shouldn't just get it because we've

got a big briefcase of money to give to somebody to receive the the like what the fuck it's because we want to go to Bali That's why I'm saying this about Italy Like yeah, like it's a it's a net good that they have the that they have the the shots instead of us like it will Literally result in more people being alive at the end of the day we're not even locked down they just opened our office up like like like like like like like like like like like like? like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like to to to to to to to to to to to go to go to go to go to go to go to to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to go to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to alive at the end of the day. We're not even locked down. They just opened our office up. Like, you can just go to work now. And not for like American reasons where you sort of like go, oh, if the virus can't see me, I can't see it. Like, actual good reasons.

Like, holy shit, just let them have the shots. We don't really need them. I'm glad that this is not the the the the th actual. th actual thi this isn't this isn't thi this isn't this isn't thi thi this isn't thi thi this isn't thi.. this isn't thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. they they just they just they just they just they just they just they just they just they just. they just. they just. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the the the their. the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. their the. their them have the shots. We don't, we don't really need them. I'm glad that this is not like, calm down. I'm glad this isn't some wildly stupid thing that I was thinking because when I think about like, you know, our friends in like the US and the UK, like places where large chunks of the government had just kind of given up on the idea of getting people. Yeah, please give them the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine the vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine the vaccine vaccine the vaccine the vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine. the vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine vaccine. the vaccine vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. the vaccine. their. their. their. their. to. their. theirthe vaccine. Yeah, the places where they're like, oh, half of the people are wearing five masks and have not been outside in eight months and the other half are all at spring break in Cancun. Yeah, this is very adjacent to the Texas shit where, you know, the Texas government, governor is like, I'm, you don't have to do anything at all anymore you just pretend like it's not there and a whole

bunch of liberals on Twitter are like oh well you guys shouldn't get any shots then and everyone in Texas should die and Michael Moore's out here posting. Michael Moore doing this horse shit come on dude. We'll keep our precious vaccine you stupid fucking Hicks. Yeah yeah you live next to a guy that voted wrong, well, you deserve to die. And you just go like, holy shit, what if we had some sort of like community? Like you've gone, talking about the Italy thing, what if it was like, we all work together to work on, you know, who needs it deciding who has the most money for shots. What a load of shit. Like imagine the, imagine the bonds you'd form between nations if you go, you guys clearly need it way more than us. Like you took the first wave before we knew anything

about anything and just like completely wiped out your hospitals. People in there like slipping over wet spaghetti and stuff like that scene from Jacob's ladder and you probably need that more than us where we're just walking around living normal last life or other Australians are I'm still living my life but like, come on. You're not crazy Andrew. This one, this one, this one, this one still living my life, but... Like, come on. You're not crazy, Andrew. This one thing I'm with you. You're really fired up on this one.

What? Like, I know that, I know that like, people in Melbourne and Sydney have been through like more aggressive lockdowns. Yeah, I'm going to become one of those Victorians should get the vaccine first people. Sorry. And, and yeah, like, I don't know, I just think about it. It's like, I know that there are, I know that there are people in like, uh, Melbourne who, who feel genuinely like, um, who feel, what's the word, like, genuinely kind of traumatized by the lockdown stuff and the swinging back and forth and being told you you you you you you you you you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to told told told told told told to look like genuinely kind of traumatized by the lockdown stuff and the swinging back and forth and being told you got to stay home and you can't see anybody all that kind of thing but also that was part of what was done to keep the country not absolutely

laden with coronavirus and yeah I just kind of I look at it like I the city that I live in there hasn't been a case here for like And yeah, I just kind of, I look at it, like, the city that I live in, there hasn't been a case here for like, a very long time and everybody is going about their lives totally normally, nobody wears a mask here, anywhere, ever at any point. There's no kind of social distancing. My kids go to school, we go to like birthday parties on the weekend all that stuff.

People are back to French kissing the bus driver to say thank you when they get off. Absolutely. As is the can barren tradition. You see the guys hopping off and they don't do that and you say I'm really. You're a piece of shit who do you think you are? You stick your tongue down that bus bus bus bus that that bus bus that bus that bus that bus that bus that bus th. th. to to to to to to to to to the bus. to to to to th. the bus. th. th. that. that. to to the bus tho. to to thi. thi. thi. the bus thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to th. to to to to thi. to thi. to to to to to thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thee. to to thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi right now. Not cool to kiss the bus driver without eye contact, I think. Not cool. Just... Very insincere. Yeah. He's done a great job. It's not easy. But yeah, I just, I compare that to all of the countries where they've, like, at a government level, they've just kind of given up on any sort of containment or suppression or anything, or in the case of the states where like, like Settheo, there's

places like Texas where they are something like 48th or 49th in the list of like most vaccinated states. So they just have the absolute least number of people who are vaccinated and Greg Abbott is like, whatever. Yeah, I mean, the solution the solution to the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state the state the state the state the state the state the state the state state state state state state state state state state state state state state state state state state state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, or the state, the state, the absolute least number of people who are vaccinated and Greg Abbott is like, fuck it, whatever. Yeah, I mean, the solution to that is not vaccinating them. The solution to that is vaccinating the people that live there and then pulling all of the state officials out of their, their state buildings, the government buildings, all that sort of stuff, and then you can insert a bunch of beeping there to make it clear that I'm making very specific death threats.

No, I think you should list them off, just so I can get a sense of how long the beeps should be. I'd say your name of the date before you don't. So there's this moment from the French Revolution where Ropes Pierre sort of the, the like, the like, the like, the like, th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, their, their, theopespier sort of like towards the end, the like 19th overthrow of the government occurs and Ropespier tries to like off himself with a gun and extremely big content warning for the next 20 seconds. Anyway, so he, and he ends up like blowing half of his drawer off and surviving and they like strap all of that back together with a bandage. So the bandage. So there's their the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, the, the, the, the, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like, the like the like the like the like the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, like the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like blowing half of his drawer off and surviving, and they like strap all of that back together with a bandage and like feed his head into the guillotine.

And I'm just saying that with it, that's just a fun history fact. Ed, I'm just saying this alongside our previous discussion for simply no reason whatsoever. I think the solution is that you get two repeater crossbows and you fill them full of the vaccine and then you cruise around Texas, preferably out of the sunroof of a limo firing the vaccine to everyone you see. That sounds fun. I figure you could probably save one one vat of the of the green bubbling vaccine. And sort of I'm sort of envisioning sort of a forced evolutionary virus sort of scenario here where we could see if shoving them in there makes them more virus than man.

They might gain super sentience, the ability to levitate with their tentacles, or something less fun might happen. I'm just saying that the key to science is having a good hypothesis. They might just melt like the guy in Robocop who gets the toxic waste on him, you know? So basically we need like a public health event that is kind of like the purge? Yeah, I'm thinking 50% waiting for your tetanus shots outside the classroom in year 7. And, um, 50% like public parading of bodies. For the next 24 hours, it is legal to vaccinate anyone in your community. Yes. All class three vaccines are legal. I've painted my entire body in mud predator style. I've gone around with a blow dart to shooting

syringes into people. Just got a bandelier of shots. Oh boy. Well, we've solved all those problems. What's next on the list? And of course that means that we get to let the Italians have as much of the vaccine as they want and they'll stop being mad at Lucy. That'll make their noners so happy. That's right. My family, she's so big. I need so many vaccine.

Oh. And again, we want to save their lives. Yes. The doctor comes out to the waiting room, says Maria? And oh, mama Mia. Oh boy. But hey, we're like one of the good podcast right. Not one of the bad racist ones. Lucy, Lucy, what's the official policy on racism towards Italians? It's always okay.

Yeah, it's not real. Yep. I saw it on a meme on the internet, so I think we're, we're good. We're all a kind of European, probably. We are, sure are. I definitely am. Have you seen... Have you seen this motioning towards self? Lifting up shirt, temporarily blinding everybody in the room. Oh boy, but what's this commotion going on down the hall? There's some cameras outside of an operating room, Ben.

Time to read a story from CBS News about the event that is currently happening. That was such a good segue that you did. And the story also has already been published somehow. Mm-hmm. This from CBS, the medical board of California said it would investigate a plastic surgeon who appeared in a video conference for his traffic violation trial while operating. Now this could potentially be a really pro move. Yeah I'm gonna say. If he's pulling it off well. I'm just like me like, oh, I'm sorry.

I forgot about my traffic violation because I was busy saving lives. Well, what if... Do you mind if I just dial into this? You're unconscious. You can't say no. Dr. Scott Green appeared Thursday for his Sacramento Superior Court trial held virtually because of the coronavirus pandemic from an operating room, the Sacramento B reported. The state medical board said in a statement to CBS Sacramento that would look into the incident and that it, quote, expects physicians to follow the standard of care when treating

their patients. Yep, no playing words with friends with one hand and operating with the other. You know, that other, you know. That's just basic stuff. Green was dressed in surgical scrubs with a patient undergoing a procedure just out of view. The beeps of medical machinery can be heard in the background. That's how you know that like real, real medical stuff is happening. The occasional beep. Oh, shit, he's a doctor. You just need to be able to make the machine do the long beep for when you want to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, tha, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their need to be able to make the machine do the long beep for when you want to get

off the call. Oops, sorry, I gotta take this. I gotta get that. I gotta get that. Uh, quote, hello, Mr. Green, hi, are you available for trial? Ask to courtroom clerk as an officer summoned to appear in trial, raised her eyebrows. It kind of looks like you're in an operating room right now. I need you to read that with the question mark that's in there. It kind of looks like you're in an operating room right now. I am, sir. Green replied, yes, I'm in an operating room right now. Yes, I'm available for trial. Go right ahead.

That's king shit. Confidence gets you everywhere. But what if, what if like his excuse that he gave to the cop was, I have to get to surgery. I have to get. Yeah, yeah, okay. This guy doesn't get a new face in the next 20 minutes, right? He's fucked. I have an FBI agent here who needs to go undercover. I'm adjusting his hair line right now. I feel like I re-watched face off recently and the entire swapping the faces on two guys with completely different shaped heads. It's very funny. They imagined some very good face swapping technology. They, they did also, John Travolta's body is a completely good face swapping technology.

They did. Also, John Travolta's body is a completely different shape to Nicholas Cages. He's just a very... Do you think face-off is unrealistic? Not any of the world-class gunplay that our friend John Wu put together. A lot of doves in hospitals, you know. But no, just get my laser in there. All I'm saying is very funny that they had a section that involved adjusting the hairline. That's very good. The clerk reminded Green the

proceedings were being live streamed because traffic trials are required by law to be open to the public and Green said, he understood. I think I know that already. It seems like a lot of just this guy being like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, absolutely, yes. Yes to everything you say. He appeared to continue working with his head down while waiting for Court Commissioner Gary Link to continue working with his head down while waiting for court commissioner Gary Link to enter the chamber. When Link appeared and saw the doctor on the screen, the judge hesitated to proceed with

the trial out of concern for the welfare of the patient. Quote, I have another surgeon right here who's doing the surgery with me so I can stand here and let them do the surgery also, green. This is 100% doctor behavior. If you've ever worked with the doctor with with with the doctor with the doctor with the doctor with the doctor with the doctor. the doctor. the doctor. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I, th. I th. I with any doctors, they are like this all of the time, every day. Every day long they're like, no no no it's all it's all good. Whatever I want to do is fine. The judge said he didn't think it was appropriate. What the fuck was that? I had a big mouth full of coffee and I have to swallow it.

You finished talking too early, Theo. I'm like I've just told the least interesting story of all time and Andrew is now dead. I was actually nodding. Okay. Again, yep. Ben, I'll let you take this one. This is an audio medium. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I was. I'm. I'm. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. th. th. th. to. It. It. It. It............................................... take this one. This is an audio medium. Yep.

Yeah. So just go to duck. Go images and search for man nodding. Oh, wait, you're gonna need a video. Go to a doctor go videos. Look for man nodding. Or you might be able to search for like a gift, some kind of animated image. Oh, a thumbs up. Handsome man in the woods.

Oh, thank you. But yeah, anyway, did have a big mouthful of coffee. Totally agree. Those doctors, absolute cowboys. Those guys are wild. I've never worked with doctors before. It's just sort of not in my, I mean like I might have served some beers to some doctors wouldn't I? My mom worked with a, worked for like a

surgical supply like medical company for years. So a lot of, so a lot of like dealing with surgeons and also a lot of like sitting in on actual procedures. Well, because the level of training that they gave you at this company to to do this sales job was like they got them to like operate on pigs and stuff. They go away for like six week training courses. Yeah, no, they do that all the time. And like in sales jobs? Well, they have to, oh, I don't know. Well, they have to test the stuff out on.

I think the idea is that you have to, you have to know like in the level of detail like how the equipment is being used in a surgical context to be able to like answer all questions competently and all that sort of stuff and so she'd wind up sitting in on surgery and stuff and she just one of the things that always sticks with me is her talking about like how rough doctors are and like surgery is. Has anybody ever seen a video of people getting like breast implants put in? Oh, yeah, I have tons. I worked a, I worked a breast cancer conference.

It is. Wild stuff. So I have to like, I set up the little laptop up the front and them and I, I'm not going to look at the screen for the next 45 minutes. If you need me, just come and to tell me, the to, to, to, to, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, tho, have th, have th, have th, have th, have people, have people, have people, have people, have people, have people, have people, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th thi, the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi the little laptop up the front and them and I I'm not going to look at the screen for the next 45 minutes if you need me just come and tap me on the shoulder in the hallway I will blindly need myself towards the HMI cable. I'll be looking at the floor. I did the exact same thing when we were screening human centipede too at the cinema I worked at. I'm putting my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my the the th. My my th. My my dad th. My my dad th. My dad th. My dad th. My dad th. My dad th. My dad th. My dad th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I to to to th. I th. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm going. I'm the. I'm the tod. I'm today. I'm toe. I'm toe. I'm toe. I'm to to to I worked at. Putting that on and I'm getting the fuck out of there. No, thank you. My dad is also a massive coward.

I love you dad for blood, and which is a shame because he's also a medical professional and the very first surgery that he witnessed as a radiographer, he walked in and immediately there was like a spurt of blood that hit the wall behind him and he woke up on the floor. Oh man. Um, yeah, so, so mum would have to like watch these procedures and stuff. She would watch some of them in theaters, but also would just have like videotapes of them. So I would come home from school quite regularly and thuke and mom would be like on the couch taking notes with like a full screen video of like a hysterectomy. Oh, it's so upsetting.

I can't watch surgery things. Very upsetting. Not for me. But yeah, the one that sticks with me when she was talking about like when they need to operate on something like inside your abdominal cavity, you know, and she was like, yeah, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, yeah, they, yeah, yeah, they, they, yeah, they, they, yeah, they, they, they, they, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, thso, th so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, th so, that's so, that's so, that's so, that's so, that's so, that's so, that's so, that's so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so and they do the full like incision down the down the front of your kind of thing. And she was like, yeah, they what they do is they basically get a big bucket and they just scoop out all your intestines and stuff and just slop them in there. Just take them out, put them back in. Yeah, they just, like, you know, they don't disconnect them obviously, but they just, they pull them out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they just like, you know, they don't disconnect them obviously, but they just they pull them out, they slop them in there, and then they root around inside, and they do their business, and when they're done, they just tip the bucket back in. And it's just all... That just doesn't seem right. Well, yeah, so like they tip it all back in and their body. the body, like they're they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they they their their their their their their their their they their their their their their their they their they they they their they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. to to to root tip. root root tip. root tip. root root tip tip root tip tip tip tip it tip it tip it. tip it, the shape that it sits in inside your body. It's like an extension cable as long as you've got both ends

there and there's no knots in the length of it. You're good to plug a a Bosch drill into that bad boy and get drilling. Imagine a nice long extension cable and when you like just threw it into the corner of the garage it just looped itself up all nice and tidy that'd be so good. That'd th. I I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th th th th th th th th th th th thi. It thi. It's like like thi. It's like like that that that that that that the the. I the. I'd thi. I'd the. the. the. thi. thi. th thi. th th th th th th th thi. It's th thi. It's th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi thi the the the the theeeeeeean thean thean theean theeean thean theean theee the the the the the the the threw it into the corner of the garage, it just looped itself up all that and tidy. That'd be so good. That'd be great. I don't like knowing what's going on inside my body. It's like the ocean, you know?

It's fine, it's there, it's functioning. I don't want to think about it or see it. Not my business. Not my business. want to know what's happening in the ocean. Don't talk to me about your job. It's disgusting. Yeah, like I got my appendix out whenever the fuck that was last year. Yep. That's right. 2015 I think. Which is something, which apparently something that's mainly for young people, but I embarrassed myself by having my appendix explode. But, um, but that was like, that was like, you know, keyhole surgery. There was like laparoscopic surgery with these like three small incisions where they took out some very small organ, you don't even need it anyway.

And you wake up after that and try to walk around and it's like, fuck this. This hurts very badly. And that's not one of the ones where it's like, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, th, th, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, that's like, that's like, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's like, that's like, that's like and it's like, fuck this. This hurts very badly. And that's not one of the ones where it's like, hey, we put in some implants or did some liposuction or whatever. And it involves like sticking a vacuum under your skin and just raking it around. Like you're trying to get a stubborn, stubborn stain off the bottom of a pot in the sink, you know. They really put elbow grease into it is what I'm saying.

They sure do. The judge said, he didn't think it was appropriate to conduct trial under the circumstances. He told Green he'd rather said a new date for trial, quote, when you're not actively involved or participating in attending to the needs of a patient. Green apologized, sorry, sometimes surgery doesn't always go as, he said before the judge interrupted him. Good Lord. It happens. We want to keep people healthy, we want to keep them alive. That's important. Thank you, Judge. Thank you. And again, the doctor is a plastic surgeon, just reiterating them alive. That's important. Thank you, Judge. This man, again, the doctor

is a plastic surgeon, just reiterating that point. Oh, really? Oh, well then. So yeah, so any danger, he has created himself. If there's any like public health concern, it was him that took the face off the person first and is struggling to reattach the face. Maybe he's just putting in a nice big set of jugs, you know? Maybe he's, maybe, this is right, he should be focusing on that. If I do not finalize this woman's Brazilian butt lift, who knows what could happen? A call seeking comment from green has not been returned. Too busy.

Too busy doing two surgeries at once. Yeah, a reporter calls him and he answers, hello. Peep! Pipip! Bip-bip! Gotta go! I'll be right with you. Hic-holla for one minute.

Speaking of people who may or may not be doctors. For all we know. If you asked him, he may well say yes. This is a new story I didn't know I really needed in 2021. Yep. You know, sometimes there's too much new stuff happening all the time. A little nostalgia, a little throwback. Yeah. And then they reboot a franchise that you're just not expected.

It's like the hits, you know? It's like the hits. Blade Runner doesn't need a sequel, but boy howdy was Bladrunner 2049 good. So true. Ben, that might have been the last good thing that that happened that happened that happened that happened that happened that that happened that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that might have been the last good thing to happen. It might be. Name a good thing that happened after Blank. He was born. Yeah.

Guess he got a point. Ben, I think I have some kind of psychological issue where I've been unable to watch the blade run at sequel. You should just just do it. I keep going, oh, it's probably good. And then I don't watch it. You should just get fucking blazed out of your mind. Let's sit down and watch all four and a half hours or how long it is of just absolute fucking beauty.

Have you got that thing where you can't watch a movie that you think is actually going to be like good in a good way because then you might have to like think about whether or not you liked it, whether it stacked up to expectations and all that sort of stuff. So instead you watch music by Cia, which you chose to watch instead of a good film? Probably. I mean, what we're really saying is you watched music by Cia instead of Bladrunner 2049. You had a choice. You had a choice. You could have

watched anything when you sat down on that couch. If this were the old days, you're saying I would have been standing in a DVD rental store. Yes, renting music by se in one hand. Blade Runner 249 and the other. And then like every time an employee walks past, you're like, have you seen these? These any good? Everyone's pointing to Blade Runner in th on th on th on th on th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th like every time an employee walks past, you're like, have you seen these, these any good? Everyone's pointing to Blade Runner in 2049. And you'll just be like, ah! Yeah, but I love to see her in the My Little Pony movie, so... Anyways, Nelly Yoa. Nelly, Motherfucking Yoa is back.

This is a strange man who, I feel that his story probably became sadder the longer it went on. But it did go on and we did talk about it in episodes 29, 45, 67, and 103. Wow, that's a long time ago. That's some lot of numbers. He's been at it. He's, yeah. This man is consistently described in the media as a serial fabulist. And I believe I've also seen him describe as a serial fantasist. Hmm, I like both. One makes him sound like he writes a long series of dragon-lance novels and the other makes it sound like he's a magician. The other one makes him sound like Willy Wonka.

He could be any of these things. None of us know. I will say, I do, I do think that a term like serial fabulous is more appropriate for Nelly than say the more commonly applied compulsive liar. Compulsive liar says to me that somebody can't stop themselves from lying about like mundane things. Yeah, ask him what color the sky is and he was like pink. Yeah, whereas Nelly Yo, if you ask him what color the sky is, he says blue, and also my shoulders hold it up. We say what color is... It's up there because of me.

What color is the sky? He'll say, well it's a slightly different shade of blue when you are hanging out on top of the Burge Khalifa with the crown prince of Saudi Arabia, as I was doing last week. So, yeah, the long litany of stories about this strange, strange man. It involved things like, so he was in the media at one point talking about how he like did lots of help in the community to like resolve violence between Sudanese gangs. That was the original thing, wasn't it? Remember the Apex gang? Oh, right? Now that's a throwback. That is a throwback. That's a fun one. Wow. Yep, the Apex gang, the terrifying hordes of African teen gang members that were overrunning Melbourne. And then I guess at some point the that the that the that that th th th that thoom point that that thoom point that that tho-up tho-up tho-up tho-up point that tho-upon tho-upon that that tho-upon tho-upon tho-upon thi tho-upon tho-upon that was that was was was was that was was that was was was that was was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was thi thi thi tho-up tho-up tho-up tho-up tho-up tho-up tho-up th gang members that were overrunning Melbourne. And then I guess at some point that just sort of resolved itself. It was definitely...

Well, they had to...it's a curfew now. It was definitely real. Yeah. Yeah. And then nearly a lot of you were kind of landed in the Herald Sun's lap. In such a way that like many kind of like tokenized people of color or marginalized people, like would in that he was like, yes, that thing is very real, but I'm teaching them sock. I'm pretty sure it was actually the age that ran this story. The age, there you go.

I just default to blaming the Herald-Son. Yeah, they're the least racist of the big newspapers. But not not racist. The least racist of the three big racism newspapers. Yeah, and then so the soccer thing also led to him saying, oh yeah, I have totally been invited to like play for an English Premier League team. I feel like there was some other very good stuff in there. Claim to be nominated for Australian of the Year. He snuck into the Brownlow Awards.

Yep. Is that the AFL one? I don't know. Yeah, he snuck in. Because he was also claiming that he was like trying out for AFL teams and they were all fighting over him at some point and then he snuck into the Brownlow Awards and somebody said, who are you? And he went and hid in a toilet until he eventually emerged, they threw him out. So yeah, basically makes up a lot of stuff. And then when people write about the stuff that he made up in the paper, he sends them things saying, hey, I'm going to sue you.

I have all the evidence that this is true. And they say, sure, show me some. And he goes, well, beep. Go to go, I'm doing life-saving surgery. I'm N life-saving surgery, I'm Nellie Yoa. So you can go back to episodes 29, 45, 67, 103 to see the saga of Nellie Yoa playing out. Now, unbeknownst to us, while all of the Victorian government quarantine staff in hotels debacle stuff has been

happening. We saw a story that was like, hey one of these people who's been hired to work quarantine is known convicted perjurer nearly yoa and I believe we all collectively went, Huh? Huh? The Victorian government has ordered a staffing review after a self-promoting perjurer who was yesterday convicted of assault, mmm. No.

Was hired to work in a state's hotel quarantine system. Nelly-yo arose to prominence in 2018 and 2019 over a series of discredited public claims from being a South Sudanese youth mentor to trialing with top-level soccer clubs to having Usain Bolt attend the birth of one of his children. Oh, it's so good lie. That's an extraordinarily good lie. There's no way to ask Usain Bolt things. In terms of like a brag to have... You just hear that. You would not that, you thiiiiiiiii th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho to tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thoing with thoing with thoing with they try tryli trylioliolioliolioling to-s to-s thea thea theluo-s toiling with toiling with toiling with toiling way to ask Usain Bolt things. It does in terms of like a brag to have.

You just hear that. You would not know what to do with that information. You'd be like, oh. Oh, okay. All right. Cool. Like, I definitely think that his, um, I definitely think a lot of his claims are kind of, in a, in a sort of good sweet spot where they're like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, there, there, there, there, there, there, th, there, there, there, there, there, th, there, there, there, there, there's, there's, thi, thi, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, there's, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th is, th is th is the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thi, thi, thi, their, thi's, there's, thi's, thi's, thi's, their, their, their, their, thi's, thi, th spot where they're like they're pretty sort of outlandish but too outland like not so outlandish that the average

person just can't kind of go oh I guess so and then you get to Usain Bolt was at the birth of my child well how, how does an ordinary person process or disprove that? I guess you can't. He had a photo of him with Usain Bolt from when they were both at the same nightclub one time, which I believe was sort of planted the seed of my very close friend, Usain Bolt. I actually delivered my child. Very fast delivery. Yeah, like a lot of these things are sort of, oh, you know, I've played sport for a long time and I did a trial for like an English Premier League club. Be like, oh, I guess I just kind of have to take your word for that. Where it stops kind of working, and I thi thi thi thi thi sort of, thi, very, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, very thi, very sort thi, very sort thi, thi, very sort thi, very sort thi, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort sort to to to I just kind of have to take your word for that.

Where it stops kind of working is as soon as a reporter hears this, and they just phone the club and say, hey, have you ever offered a very expensive contract to someone named Nelly Yoa, and they say, who the fuck are you talking about? Or you call Usain Bolt's manager and say hey we have some questions about his very close personal friend Nelly Yoa and they say who the fuck are you talking about? But what's he been up to lately? He has been facing the Ballarat magistrate's court on Tuesday where he pleaded guilty to unlawful assault and was fine $3,000. Not great. Not ideal.

He had previously been found guilty of perjury and making a false statement to police. Also, not great. In Parliament, opposition leader Michael O'Brien questioned the state government on how it could justify employing a convicted criminal to manage highly sensitive personal information of Victorians. It's actually a decent question. Amazing. Government services minister Danny Pearson said the man was employed by a COVID-19 quarantine Victoria, CQV and did some training but did not work a shift. According to News Corp, Yoah's lawyer Hazel Wally told the Ballarat magistrate's court

that he was hired by the Department of Justice to work in hotel quarantine facilities on a 12-month contract in December. It is understood Yoa was training as a resident support officer, a job with advertised duty such as escorting return travelers to hotels, temperature checking, and delivering parcels to rooms. Yoa has shockingly declined to comment. It's not his style. Usually he responds with extraordinarily long rebuttals. That's true. Hmm. Not, wouldn't be my first choice to be working in the hotel quarantine system.

Imagine, uh, imagine the story you would get about why your parcel didn't arrive. It would be so good. Hey, uh, somebody sent me a PlayStation 5 while I'm stuck in quarantine. Any word on that? Any idea? Oh, dear. Oh, dear. Poor Nelly. That man can't catch a break. You sure can't. Or he's caught too many breaks. Either of those things. Must be kind of weird to just not be able to stop lying all the time? Must be fun though.

I feel like I'd have much more fun that way. Maybe I'll give it a go. What sort of lies are we talking? Where are you going to start? What scale? I'd have to, I think, just telling really fanceful lies would be really fun. Like saying that you're friends with celebrities and stuff like that. I'm going to start telling people I'm on the Buntavista podcast, which is very popular and cool.

We have millions of listeners and millions of dollars. That is both true, both very true. I'm rich. I don't know about you guys. I'm going to tell people I'm an orthodontist. Just for no reason? It'd be fun to look like me than tell people that you're an orthodontist. Are you sure? You sure you're an orthodontist? Oh, absolutely.

Teeth, love them. Can't get enough of them. Know all about them. Think about them a lot. I'm daydreaming about teeth right now. I'm barely paying attention to the conversation. I would tell people that chiropractors are real doctors. They trick you by sounding real. Like it's what a, like chiropractor is a word, I'm like, well that must be. That sounds medical? It's not fake. It sounds like a medical word, that's right.

It's all fake. It's all fake. It's all fake. Sounds pretty legit. It feels good when someone cracks you back though. Oh my god. It feels right, so maybe there's something to it. I'm looking for a small person to walk on my back. I think I will add that to the list of things we could do when we hang out. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

I crack in all of us back sometimes. And I hadn't done it for a very long time and she was like, I feel like my back needs crack and I did it the other day and it sounded like about 70 knuckles popping at once It was horrifying so many cracks She loves that shit and she can still walk so maybe carapactors are real, you know Maybe you are a chiropractor maybe I am. Yeah, I'm as much a chiropractor as anyone else is. Hi everybody, it's me. It's Theo. Now I guarantee you I'm more afraid of recording this promo than you are of listening to it, so hear me out.

If you haven't already, maybe check out our Patreon. It's a great way to support the show, and it gives us the ability to actually dedicate time to this thing. You'll get all of our bonus episodes, it, that's, tho, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the tho, tho, the tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the the the the the tho, the the, the, the the, the, the, the, thea, thea, thea'''''-a'a'-s, thea'ea'ea'ea'ea'-s, thea'-s, tho-s, tho, th to this thing. You'll get all of our bonus episodes, it's over 300 extra episodes in total, and we'll set up a feed over there with none of these promos so you won't have to hear this ever again. You'll also get access to our Discord, which honestly has turned into a nice and funny place full of mostly normal people to hang out with. So that's Patreon. tho-Punter Vista. Check it out. Oh, chiropracting, a real pseudoscience. Ben, what's going on in the world of science? Is there perhaps, would you like to do a little bit of talking while I remember that I meant to do the theme for this? Uh, well, don't't worry I found it. You shall see hail fall from a clear sky and burn his fire upon the ground.

You shall see darkness cover Egypt when the sun climbs high to noon. And you shall know that God is God, and bow down to his will. What's that segment, Ben? That is, of course, the theme for Omen's Importance. I was really hoping you were going to read this story because there's a bunch of names in there that look really hard to pronounce, but it looks like it's going to be me. Well, sucks to be you, pal.

This is a press release from Tel Aviv University. A robot able to hear through the ear of a locust. No. I don't like that at all. No. Couldn't have chosen a more biblical animal to do this with. Researchers at Tel Aviv University report they have successfully connected the ear of a dead locust to a robot that receives the ears electrical signals and responds accordingly. The result is extraordinary.

When the researchers clap once, the locusts ear is the sound and the robot moves forward. But the researchers clap twice, the robot moves backwards. They wired a clapper to a robot through the ear of a dead locust. We already have clappers. You don't need to involve a locust ear in the... Maybe this is what we need to bring the clapper back. I feel like the clapper went out of fashion. Kids these days probably don't even know about the clapper. They probably don't. Are they just using this as like a little bit of like material that vibrates when... Like are they just using it like a like a normal microphone?

I mean it sounds like... Yes, yeah, more or less. But... We have microphones. Yeah, but they're not made of locust parts. All right. Also, the, like the clapper part seems unnecessary. You could have just th like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the, like, like, like, of locus parts. All right. Also, the like the clap apart seems unnecessary. You could have just made like, you could have just plugged that into audacity and been like, oh, there we go, it's recorded the clap. But instead, they had to move a robot with it. Very strange. It's, I think it's solely so that you can say, uh, check out this spooky robot. Yeah, we made it. Yeah, locust corpse parts. I made a Frankenstein, basically.

I made an insect Frankenstein. The interdisciplinary study was led by Adarn Fischel, a joint master student under the joint supervision of Dr. Ben M. Oh, no, there's so many names in here. Oh, good lord, this paragraph is a nightmare. We can wait. No, that's fine. We can go fast.

Yeah, no, it's literally, it's a whole paragraph of them just keeps going. The researchers explained that at the beginning of the study, they sought to examine how the advantages of biological systems could be integrated into technological systems, and how the sensors of dead locust could be used as sensors for a robot. Now they're using, this is sensors and sensors. So the senses of a dead locust for the sensors of a robot. But we have a normal accent where those words sound the same. Sensors and senses.

Yep. Senses. Perfect. How about I get censored for talking about the senses of the sensors. Huh? Yep. That sounds great. We chose the sense of hearing because it can be easily compared to existing technologies. In contrast to the sense of smell, for example, where the challenge is much greater, says, I'm going to call him Dr. Ben. Our task was to replace the robot's electronic microphone with a dead insect's ear using the ear's ability to detect the electrical signals from the environment, in this case vibrations in the air, and using a special chip to convert the insect input to that of the robot. An insect to electricity chip.

A special chip, which I'm sure is just like a raspberry pie that they've got hooked up to. At least just call this a locust Frankenstein. Like, let's get to it, let's not dance around it. Cyborg locust is dope. To carry out this unique and unconventional task, the interdisciplinary team faced a number of challenges. In the first stage, the research has built a robot capable of responding to signals it receives from the environment. Then in a multidisciplinary collaboration, how is that different from interdisciplinary? I feel like inter-ismobsterns, multi-multi might be many disciplines.

That sounds true. Perhaps? Interdisciplinary is relating to more than one branch of knowledge. And multidisciplinary, anyway. So the interdisciplinary team in a multi-disciplinary collaboration collaboration, we're able to, is a, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, is that, is that, is, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, how is, how is, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how is that, how of knowledge. And multidisciplinary, anyway, so the interdisciplinary team in a multi-disciplinary collaboration, we're able to isolate and characterize the dead locust ear and keep it alive. That is functional long enough to successfully connect it to the robot. In the final stage, the research has succeeded in finding a way to pick up the signals received by the locusts ear in a way that could be used by the robot. At the end of the process, the robot was able to hear the sounds and respond accordingly. Professor Ialee's laboratory has extensive experience working with locusts and they have developed

the skills to isolate and characterize the ear, explains Dr. Ben. So, yeah, it's right there on the side. Did they they they they they they they they they they they they they they go they go they go they go th thooooo. Okay tho. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, it's right there on the side. Did they go, okay, well we need, we need to make a robot here, and we're mostly just big locust guys here. It seems like it. What have you guys got on hand? What have we got here? We got locusts.

These fucking locusts. Professor Yovil's laboratory built the robot and developed code that enables the robot to respond to electrical auditory signals. A clapper, you invented the clapper. If you're going to keep referring to it, does someone will explain to any young people what the clapple is. So imagine if your light switch was powecked to a locusts ear. Now we're talking and you're hearing through a locust. Now we're talking and you're hearing through a to to to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a the the their their their their their their their their their. Imagine if your light switch was hooked up to a locust ear. Now we're talking, and you're hearing to a locust. My laboratory has developed a special device, ear on a chip. Now that is ear-hip, ear-on-on-a-hyphen chip.

Ear on a chip. That is the name of the device that they have invented. This is so bad also that's 100% like a bad British food. I'm some ear on a chip. Ear on a chip. Just call it cyber ear and be done with it, you know? Ear on a chip allows the ear to be kept alive throughout the experiment by supplying oxygen and food to the organ while allowing the electrical signals to be taken out of the locust ear and amplified and transmitted to the robot. So it's a living locust ear that's like, it's a brain and a jar situation, but it's an ear

on a chip. Yeah, but they have to like tip some fish food in there every day. Yep. In general. And on weekends, they all die. Oh, fuck, I forgot to feed my locusteers. You go away for a long weekend, come back. I don't like that. There's a, one of those little, uh, what are the things you type into and then you print out and it's got the little text.

Label maker? Label maker? Label maker. My brain's not good. All right, I got one of this label maker stickers under the light switch. Have you fed the locust ears? Question mark? It's like one of those passive aggressive office notes where it's been like highlighted, like quadruple underlined. Somebody?

Look, we're all adults. We all have to share the locust ears. Your mom's not here to feed your locust. Your mother doesn't work here. Feed your own locusty. In general, biological systems have a huge advantage over technological systems, both in terms of sensitivity and in terms of energy consumption. This initiative of Tel Aviv University researchers opens the door to sensory integrations between robots and insects. Dope. And may make much more cumbersome and expensive developments in the field of robotics redundant. This is good.

This is a technology path I want to go down, is combining robots and insects. Do you like insects are the last kind of animal that I want to mix with a robot? Sharks. Jellyfish? I mean, you're going to get electrocuted down there, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's that's, it's that's that's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to, to. to, to. to, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to to to to t t t t t t t t t t t t t to t t to to to to to to to th to th th th to th th th to to're going to get electrocuted down there, it's fine. Oh good, yeah that's true. We're safe.

We're safe from them. Robot locust sounds horrifying. Like we can already see what happened when they tried to make a robot version of a dog. Well, they strapped a gun to it and now it's patrolling the streets. It's just this horrible little fucking thing. No, I'm talking about the like the Boston Dynamics Big Dog. You're not talking about the competitor to the Furby, the toy Poochee. I was thinking about Poochee.

Not presently. I'm not currently talking about Poochee. So that's the most private robot we can think of. If you're under the age of 20, Google Poochee, check that shit out. It fucking sucks so bad. I wanted one so bad. I'm so glad my mom never got me one. My sister had one. It was fucking awful. It didn't do anything. It wasn't a real robot at all. It's not, it does nothing. useless. For the record if you are going to Google this, it is spelled P-O-O-H-H-R. Is that true? Oh, poo-shi. Yeah. Pooh-c-coo is in like the other tea. Chee is in life force, yeah. Uh-hit-fors. Why did they spell it that way? Wait, hang who hyphen c-chie or P-O-C-H-I-E?

One of the first generations of robo-pet toys. And one of the last as well. There was that fucking... That weird, uh, gorilla one? They had the big forearms like Hellboy. Oh, I don't know about that one. No. Yeah.

I don't like any of these things. It should be understood that biological systems expand negligible energy compared to electronic systems. They are miniature and therefore also extremely economical and efficient. For the ta-sa-sa-sa-siiii, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, th, th, th, th, thi, th, thi, I'm thi, thi, thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm, I, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I I I I I I I I, I I I I I, I I I thi... I thi.. I's, I'm, I'm thi. I'm thr-s. thr. I'm thr. thr-s, I'm not thin, I'm not thin, thin, thin, thin, th th th th th th th th th th th th th thin, I'm not th th th th th the sake of comparison, the laptop consumes about 100 watts per hour, while the human brain consumes about 20 watts a day. About five in my case I reckon. And also, now he's fucked up. He's fucked up right here. He's a crank. Doesn't know what he's talking about. Want to go into detail there, Theo? 100%. What's is an instantaneous measure of power? You don't consume 100 watts per hour or 20 watts per any time period. It's just 100 watts, 20 watts.

I mean, if you look at your laptop charger, it's 100 watts. I looked it up, the brain does consume 20 watts, but that's not per day. That's just 20 watts so this man who is running a lab for sensors like robot sensors and that sort thing does not know what a watt is the basic measure of power which is jewels per second I don't I don't think this guy's a scientist at all I think this is just a locus just a locus guy just a scientist at all. I think this is a... I think he's making shit up. Just a locust guy.

Stick to your lane, then. Can you sew this onto a robot for me real quick? All right. Maybe he's... Well, I get my thesis out of it? She might be the locus guy, not the robot guy. Yeah. Anytime that you read this shit, the way, it's either A, to complete someone's thesis, so this is for a master's student, a joint master student under the joint supervision of some guys, right? So it's a master's thesis or they're

trying to get funding for to continue selling locust ears on something. Like, the reason they had to put it on a robot is because people don't want to see an LED light up. I mean, the thing of coding a robot to go backwards and forwards is a lazy afternoons amount of work. The ear thing, probably more work than it's worth, I'd say, but the locusteer is very small. Very small. That that thing. That'll take ages. This is, yeah, anyway, we have to keep doing this so like people can complete their education and stuff. This is why this, you have to just accept that when you get to the close to the end of your education

they make you do a fucking thing. And you've got to make up a thing to do and you, and you, and you, and you, and you, and tho, and tho, and tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tha, tho, tho, tho, tho, that, that, that, that, that, that, tho, tho, tho, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha''''''a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a, tha, tha, tha, tha end of your education, they make you do a fucking thing. And you've got to make up a thing to do and you go, and then occasionally someone goes, oh, that's cool. And they put it in the university paper with a thing that makes it clear that nobody knows what they're talking about. So that's very cool. Education rules love academia. It's even cooler that in Australian universities now, the government is like, we will only fund

research if it will make a specific amount of money. Or a bomb. That's the only reason. Yeah, if you can use it to terrorize a Middle Eastern country or we can hock it overseas, then we're on board. So if we put this locusteer on the of the rocket and tune it to the particular frequency that the hospital machines beep at in Yemen, you might get some funding for that. That's exactly what this thing is. It hears the beep and then it steps forward using the body

that it's in. Get the bomb closer to hospitals. Oh no! Oh no! What have we created? What have you done? It'll take like weeks to get there, but slowly and surely it will arrive eventually. You know how in the Manhattan Project or whatever, you know, they had these big things that are like made to scientific processes to make bombs and they would just set aside

hectares in the desert of like these huge, huge warehouses, you know, doing over any refining nuclear material, doing whatever, except there's somewhere in Israel where now suddenly the Israeli government is building gigantic warehouses full of locusts so they can harvest the ears and put them on little bombs. And the Americans are paying them $4 billion to do this. We should stop doing science. I think we've done enough. We've done enough. We've worked out. We've gotten down to quarks. And that's about all we need to know. Okay, what about if you have one of those? You can't. Okay, well what if you do? It's too small. What if you could? We've not got a knife small enough yet. Yeah. Everything's scientific turned out pretty bad. Like we figured. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We' th. We're th. We're th. We're th. We're th. th. We're th. th. th. We're th. th. th. We've th. th. th. theee. We've tho. We've tho. We've tho. theeee. We've tho. We've tho. We've the. We've th. We've bad. Like we figured out how to fly and go to other places and just kind of just destroy the predominantly we worked out ways to put CO2 into the air.

That's that's it. We made industry. Chuck some carbon dioxide up in that bad boy. Made some cars or you better believe that's some CO2 baby. We made some planes which are which are fun. They're cool. We all love planes. And now we're putting art on the blockchain.

I don't, I fucking. And so now to buy a fucking thing and Kings of Leon album you have to idle a semi-trailer in the desert for four days. I didn't even try understanding that. For some fucking reason. I saw the article and I was like, no. And all the Bitcoin freaks are like, oh dude, this will make energy more efficient. When is that happening? When is that going to happen?

I did see that exact conversation player. Let me start off by saying, I want my tokens fungible. Hey, can you funge that token for me? Sorry, buddy. Clearly non-fungible. I don't... Damn it. I guess I don't really actually want to understand this,

and I don't want to explain it to me in any way, but like the idea of these... And here I the the the the the the idea, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the idea, the, the, the idea, the idea, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th.... th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thi. And, the. the. thi. to. to. to. today, to. to. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. artworks is that you it's yours you get it and then it's yours but everybody else can see it yeah no but now it's on the blockchain and that's the the I can ask you sure please the answer is gonna upset me um so have you seen the what the fuck is it called the MBA Shots thing oh yeah then I don't know a lot about it but go on the the the the answer is the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the answer the answer the the the the the th seen the, what the fuck is it called, the NBA shots? Oh, yeah, I don't know a lot about it, but go on. If it's on the blockchain, I can tell you, it's very dumb and it involves, it involves like, yeah, all right, what are we talking about?

So I've, I've seen people posting like videos and themselves opening these things called top shot made by NBA, right? And basically it's a thing where you open it on your phone and it's like a collector's card kind of thing but it's digital and on the blockchain and stupid and you pay money for it and then like once you paid money for it You open it up on your phone and it's like Check out this six-second clip of someone in the NBA doing a dunk that you can just watch on YouTube But it's yours you bought it so um so I'm looking at the website here and says own the best moments

from NBA history MBA fans from around the world collecting top shop moments with over 200 million dollars plus in US dollar sales across rookies vets and rising star players. Just absolutely absurd. So they've basically the NBA has done this thing where they have said oh we're going to do like fucking blockchained collectible snippets of dunks and stuff. And then you own that thing. I guess like, I'm in, I have the same issue as you here, Ben, clearly, which is the idea

of we have made a digital asset that is unique so that you can express some form of ownership over something that is like... Needlessly, unique ownership as well, which is weird. Like you wouldn't lose anything if someone else could look at the piece of art that you had. You know? That you, you own. It's not like you've got a Rembrandt in your house and then uh, someone is like, hey, I want to look at this as well, and they take it out of your house and put it in their house for a while. Like, you can have a piece of art.

I don't get it. I don't understand any of this. Well, it's not even like having an original painting. And then other people have prints of the painting, which doesn't take away anything from your physical ownership of a painting. In this case though, other people can have digital copies of the thing that you have that also isn't physical. It's so fucking stupid. And let's just be clear, the important and intractable part of this entire process is the idling of the semi-trail. Yes. Right, so we need to do that.

We need to make a room very, very hot to solve some mathematical problems for that proof of ownership. It is the entire process, right? So at the end that you pops out and says, this was really hard to do, so it proves that, you that part. So it's literally taking things that already exists that can be just freely thing and going you know we can make some money by assigning ownership to different part like one per dunk in the MBAs case and we do

this by by providing they call it proof of work which is again they have to come up with some some answer to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a th. th. So. So. So. So. So th. So th. So thi. So thi. So thi. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. this. this. this. this. this. this this this this this this this this. this this. this this. It's this. It's this. It's thi. It's th. It's which is again, they have to come up with some answer to a mathematical problem, which is technically it's hashing a SHA 256 thing. But basically it's just running maths until they come up with an answer that's better than the last one. And that takes a huge amount of energy, which again, we're just fucking firing off into the sky at the most sensitive part in human history, I'd say, for, you know, environmental concerns, and so that at the end, the NBA can sell this to make a little bit of money and give proof of ownership over something that is already freely tradable.

So we are converting the environment directly into money for people that already have billions of dollars. That is what the blockchain exists for. We have actually found a way of doing this that doesn't involve the sort of very emissions-heavy computational process and that is you have to wait into coastal waters and choke a leatherback turtle with your bare hands. And if you just show a photo that you have killed that turtle, yeah, that's right. Then you get a... One leather back turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, that, thi, thi, that, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. That's, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, that, thr-a, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, throoooooooo. And, that, thi. And,turtle. Yeah, that's right. Then you get a... One leatherback turtle, one NBA dunk. The old-fashioned way. This is what we used to do. We need to get back to the old ways. I saw this exact conversation that you're describing play out in real time. The other day,

the other day, Theo, which was somebody you're talking about, hey everybody, as of this date, you know, whatever the fuck the number was, 1.5 trillion dollars have been, has been like generated and spent without the use of banks through Bitcoin. And all these people were like, without banks, huh? How did you do anything with the money at the end? Well, it's an artifact. We're in a transitionary period from, I guess, all of human history up until now, into the Bitcoin era. And there's just, the banks are just there until we sort this whole Bitcoin thing out.

And, um, and yeah, and, you know, as usual, people post the studies that show the amount of emissions that are generated...... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that's, that's, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, the the the the the the the th. that. thi. that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. th. th. th. thing out. And yeah, as usual, people post the studies that show the amount of emissions that are generated by doing this stuff and it's like, yeah, in order to generate this much money, you have to use the same amount of emissions that all of Spain uses in a year. And it's absolutely absurd. And then somebody weighs in with what you were talking about. Yeah, but they've actually, Ethereum is working on ways to make the generation of their stuff more. Yeah, again, it doesn't put the CO2 back in the ground.

And also, we already have payment processes that don't use a absolute shit ton of energy. And the concept that we're going to get more efficient energy generation from Bitcoin and Ethereum as opposed to, you know, not having to use energy generation to make it $5. Exactly, like the best, the most efficient energy is the ones that we don't generate, but also like that shit like smelting aluminium isn't already putting a massive downwards pressure on electricity prices? Like the fact that electricity prices are incredibly political already, like there is already more downward pressure on electricity prices than just about any other good in the entire

world, right? Like how, we don't fuck talk about like the price of milk anymore, right? We've accepted that that's $2.00. Wherever you are, it's two bucks, it's the thi, it's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, it's thi, it's thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. Like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi price thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the fact, the fact, the fact, the fact, the fact, the fact, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi fact thi. thi. thi. talk about like the price of milk anymore, right? We've accepted that that's $2. Wherever you are, it's two bucks for milk. That's it, right? But like every fucking day we've got to talk about the price of power. Like, so what do they expect the Bitcoin is doing to make power more efficient than like all the rest of the other shit is not already doing? It's nothing they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin their Bitcoin. Bitcoin their Bitcoin. Bitcoin their Bitcoin their Bitcoin thi Bitcoin thi Bitcoin thi Bitcoin is thi? Bitcoin is thi? Bitcoin is like thi? Bitcoin is like thi. Bitcoin is like thi. Bitcoin is thi. Bitcoin is that thi. Bitcoin is that that that that thi. Bitcoin is thi. Bitcoin is th. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. th. Bitcoin. th. Bitcoin. th. Bitcoin. th. Bitcoin. Bitcoin. th. Bitcoin. th. Bitcoin is like like like like like like th. Bitcoin is like like th. Bitcoin is th. Bitcoin is thi? Bitcoin is thi? Bitcoin is for thi? Bitcoin is for thi. thi. Bitcoin is for thi. thi. Bitcoin is for thi. thi. Bitcoin is thi. Bitcoin is thi. thi. thi. Bitcoin is thi. Bitcoin is thi. thi. Bitcoin is the rest of the other shit is not already doing. It's nothing. They're just there. Bitcoin is for nerds that are dumb. I agree. Well, yeah, but like the other issue with the making it more efficient from what it currently is, which is hugely inefficient, like monstrously inefficient.

By design is that that also kind of presupposes the idea that by like making it more efficient will be part of the process of having a massive uptake in everyone else in the world using that as their way of generating money? We've made it twice as efficient, which you won't. And now twice as many people are using it, which arrives us back in exactly the same spot. It's fucked. We should finish this story. I'm mad. I'm I'm mad. I've got like four sentences. You got to wrap it up then. Nature is much more advanced than we are. So we should use it. The principle we have demonstrated can be used and

implied to other senses such as smell, sight and touch. You know, they could smell a hospital. Mm-hmm. We're envisioning locust nose, locust eyes, and grabby little locust hands. You may mount all that on a locust body. Oh, locust body. Put that back all together in one package.

For example, some animals have amazing abilities to detect explosives or drugs. The creation of a robot with a biological nose could help us preserve human life and identify criminals in a way that is not possible today. There it is. And we know who they're talking about there. The entire criminal race that we keep in our backyard for reasons that we will not be led on or criticized for. Try it. Some animals know how the diseases, others can sense earthquakes, others can smell Palestinian, no it doesn't say that. The sky is the limit. Just leave it alone. Take your white coat off, fold it neatly, walk out of the office, and go become a fitter

and turner. Yep. Hmm. That's what's up. That's what's up? That's what's up? That's what's up. That's what's up?

Wander into the forests and commune with it by becoming a fitter and turner. That thing that you can totally do while living in the park. I feel so at peace with these trees. It's just me, the trees, my big old smelter. Dong-dong. Me, the trees and this series of pipes that I'm aimlessly connecting together and extending. Wrapping it around through all the trees. It's a beautiful image. And that is where we're going to leave it for the week. Sorry for talking to Theo about the flash trip.

Theo, thank you for being. Everyone's got their thing. Yeah. You understand things. We have other stuff going on. Yep. You understand things. We can't say names. We can't do names good.

Oh, I can't do names good, all words good either. Andrew likes to talk about movies and I will not take any shred of criticism about my own habits. So, let's wrap it up. Okay. Oh, Mama Mia. That's a spicy meal. See you next week, everybody. Ciao. Bon doctor. you to be