Boonta Vista - EPISODE 19: The Fountain Pen Of Youth

Episode Date: October 11, 2017

The original Boonta crew are back and we're doing a Boonta Book Club reading of Caleb Bond's latest smart guy word-diarrhoea about teens. We also discuss Ben's recent trip to Area 51 and the horrifying piece 'Sodom and Tomorrow' that was recently published in the fancy toilet rag Quadrant Online. Support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista Don't forget to rate & subscribe on iTunes if that's your thing. _____________________________ Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista iTunes: tinyurl.com/y8d5aenm Stitcher: www.stitcher.com/s?fid=144888&refid=stpr Pocket Casts: pca.st/SPZB RSS: tinyurl.com/kq84ddb Ear Buds Network: earbudsnetwork.com

Airbuds, Melbourne's podcast network, Earbuds Network, Earbuds Network. to the today's socialist club episode 19. I'm Andrew and I'm here with Ben. Hello. Hey friend. Hi, calling in all the way from, am I reading this right, the united starts. Correct. I mean the united starts of Amritsa. It is beautiful here. I'm in, I believe, the town is called Dickinson, North Dakota. Nice. Did you just laugh at Dickinson, Lucy?

Grow up. I'm sorry. And returning from the damp shores of Europe we have with us, Lucy. Hi, Lucy. Hello, I'm back from the country of Europe. Finally. Everyone's favorite nation, Europe. Everyone's favorite tiny nation. How is Europe at the moment? What does it look like on the ground? It's a very European. There's a lot of old shit there. Yep. It's pretty much it. It's pretty much Europe. It's all the same. All one homogenous country.

Cool. How long are you there? A month. Fusking one. Fusk one. Well, you had a month which means that you've seen absolutely everything there is to see in Europe. Absolutely everything. Which is cool. And I've had enough of it. Yeah.

Now I was just talking to Lucy before we started recording about, um, I wanted to ask what her kind of like, casual racism, co comparisons, the the the the the the thism, thism, thism, to racism, to racism, to com com com com com com com com com com com com com com, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th, th, thoomomomomomomoomoomoomoomoomoom, their, their, the thoomoomoomoomoome, thoooomooomoomoome, the, too tooome, to to to tooome, to Lucy before we started recording about I wanted to ask what her kind of like casual racism comparisons were between like Europe and Australia and apparently it was more sexist Italians that were the problem. They weren't sexist so much as just, they were sexy Italians so it's like, they were sexy Italians so it's like I didn't really mind that they were just disgustingly hitting on me. But I mean also when I first arrived in Berlin there was like an alt-right rally in Germany. I was like, oh yeah, in Germany this is great, this this is great, really the great, right place to have it. So yeah, it's pretty racist over there.

Nice. Yeah. Nice. What about you, Ben, if you had any fun instances? Well, you did go to an old ride rally. You did organize an old ride. I did not organize one. I listened to episode 18. Thank you very much for saying that. A lot of extreme amounts of casual racism about Mexicans all the time, especially in parts of the country that don't have any. It's kind of weird. Ah, yes. Well, that's a, that's kind of a standard part of casual racism though, isn't it?

that like the less interaction with, well, like, just casual bigotry and that people tend to be like more vocal and worried about the kinds of people they never actually have any interaction with. Yeah true they can't put a face to it so they're willing to say a bunch of dumb shit about them. It's like all the people who live in like Bendigo who are worried about living under Sharia law, you know? It could happen. It could happen at any moment. Someone's gonna flick the switch the switch of a thapapapapapapapapap. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi they're they're thi. It's they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they's they're they're they're to to to to to to to to to to to their to their to to their to to thu. It's true. It's true. It's true. It's their their their their their they're they're they're they're they're the switch and then a bunch of flags will unfurl from the front of every government building with a crescent move. Yeah, that's right. You don't go to you don't go to one council meeting and you miss a vote. Suddenly.

Suddenly, all a bendigo under Sharia law. So what we what we had for you today is we thought we might pull a dusty old segment out of the closet and do a Buntabu Book Club. I'll give you a little reading of an article by everybody's favorite conservative commentator, font of wisdom, Caleb Bond. Twelve years old and full of beautiful big ideas and long words. Precocious baby Caleb Bond. Very, very smart guy.

Everything he says, I'm smarter for having heard it. It's incredible that he's tiny adolescent legs can hold his brain at top of his shoulders. I played Lucy a clip of his voice before the show and she literally did not believe me that that's what he sounds like. He sounds like a 50 year old man. I could not believe it. It's a screech. He talks with a screech.

Well I was trying to put my finger on it. Should I play us a little clip of Caleb's views on same-sex marriage. I wish that you would. Yes. Well, here's what Caleb sounds like. Well, no, I actually voted yes. Because I believe, I take sort of the Tim Wilson point of view in terms of a conservative case for same-sex marriage, in that I believe marriage should be strengthened, and if you

have a group of people who are saying look please let us in we like this institution so much we want to be a part of it particularly at a time where we see a lot of straight people not getting married I'm quite comfortable with that what I meant was it yeah it's a Jesus Christ it's weird of shit how does he have that voice at 12 years old? I don't understand. Well the very obvious answer is that he's doing it on purpose. It's an affectation. I'd like to think that it's like, you know an Akira, how all the young psychic children

are like hyper-aged to like a year old. Yeah, they sound like old people, yeah. It's the same thing has happened thi thi thithings thithings thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s sa. thioes thioes thioes thioes thioes thioes thioes are thi. thioes thiol- that's that's that's that's that's that he's that he's that he's that he's that he's that he's that's that he's that's that's that's that's thi. thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the an the an the an the an the an thean the an thean thean the an the an the an th, it's the same thing has happened to him. The burden of his incredible brain has leached all the youth out of his body. Well, like that makes sense. Yeah, I was trying to kind of put my finger on it and I think that the answer, what it can be described as is like, teenage John Howard with a head cold. Yes, it's kind of the vibe. Even the same like the same little pauses of,

ah. Like that, even just hearing that makes me so aggravated. You can see him doing that little wet, lip smacking thing. Is it wrong to want a karate chop an 18 year old so there's a glasses break? No. Maybe if you karate chop them in the center and the glasses break down the middle but he's unharmed but frightened.

Oh, that would be good if I stopped just short. Yeah. All the force expended on the glasses. Yeah, just like a karate kid part threatens to karate the ga a guy a guy a guy a guy. the ga the ga the ga. the ga. the ga. the ga. tho. the g. th-a. th-in. th-upas. th-in. th-up. th-up. th-a-up. th-a-up. th-n-up. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-up. th-up. th-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n. th-n. th-n. th-n. th-n. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I thease. thease. thease. I theaseasease. thease. thease. theasease. thease. thease. thease. thease. thethree, where Mr. Miyagi threatens to karate chopper guy, but then he doesn't, he honks his nose and he says, honk honk. Oh, Mr. Miyagi, one of the greats. Is that Pat Marita? Classic stuff. It was Pat Marita.

Oh, he's wonderful. Who just for your trivia, folks, I'm pretty sure he was born and raised in the United States in like San Francisco, so he's putting on that extremely, extremely Asian accent through that entire series of films. But is it racist? It's not for us to say. Actually, it's probably racist to force him to do it. But then is it racist to say that I'm denying him agency by assuming that he was forced to do it. Let's not wait into that. I'm just imagining the 80s film producer going, look Pat, no one's going to believe you're Asian unless...

So, I read this article of Caleb's that came out a couple of weeks ago with some amusement. It's one of those classic opinion pieces where somebody writes a piece that they think is making statements about like you know broad sections of the populace or big general movements but what they're actually doing is telling you a bunch of very specific things about their own life. Yes. So I figured I've picked all the choice passages out of this. And I figured I might read it to you, um, uh, and just to aggravate Ben further, I will try to do it in Caleb's voice.

I just want to retain the power of veto here. If this infuriates me too much, I will make you stop. You're try and cut it off? Yeah, okay, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that it off? Yeah. Yeah, okay, that's fair. That's fair. I will call your wife until let us smash your motive. It's a, um, look, it's a democracy. So you're going to have to win Lucy over to your way of thinking. I feel like that's not going to be too hard, but give it a go. All right. Later something we, something else we've discussed is that I really want Lucy to continue doing her Pauline Hanson impression Because we got we got like four seconds of it on a previous episode and I loved it so fucking much You got the high wavery unsure

Old Boomer Bogan voice just the fate scent of tears in her voice at all times At all times. At all times. So this piece is titled, teens aren't out of control. They're boring. By dip shit teenager, Caleb Bond. So a lot of a lot of proclamations about teenagers coming up, which I think more an act of powerful projection it seems us youngens are in a spot of bother we're lagging say this to a teenager and they'll think you mean their video game is running too slowly I just want to fucking kill him I just want to straight up murder

him the gun I love that it's like what a 60 year old would say about a video game. Yeah, he has no idea. I like that he's trying to wink at the camera to distance himself from teens as well. It seems us youngens is in jokingly referring to himself as a youngen absolves him of being a teen. It doesn't. Well, he constantly, yeah, he constantly switches like the voice that he's speaking in the sense that he says, say this to a teenager and they will think you mean their video games running too slightly he follows this up with, but we are in fact getting slower to mature.

So suddenly he is a part of the teens. This switches back and forth throughout the piece, depending on how he wants you to think about teenagers at the time. So to continue, a US study released last week found today's teenagers are less likely to do things one might associate with coming of age. They're less likely to drink alcohol, drive cars, date, go out without their parents, they're staying at home longer. He lives at home. Now, yes, it's very crucial to point this out he lives at home with his parents.

Now, Caleb admits this himself. Now some might conclude this is a sign that teens have grown more responsible. Young people haven't grown more responsible. They've become more boring. Full disclosure, I'm 18 and I still live at home. I figure my parents were stupid enough to create me, so I may as well sponge off them for a few more years yet. Now, he's immediately torpedoed the entire piece.

On the fourth paragraph. By criticizing teenagers for living at home when they are able to move out, for sponging off their parents, and for continuing to live at home when they don't actually need so. So he is of legal age to move out. He has a job. He writes in the newspapers, he appears on TV shows, all that sort of thing, and yet he is still telegraphing his intention to continue living with them for several more years at least

Great job Caleb oh god. I hate him. I hate him so much. I want it. I want to physically injure the teen A powerful wedgie a powerful wedgie. A powerful wedgie. Caleb says uh, but I have a stringent saving plan so I can move out and buy a home as soon as possible. So that sentence in particular pisses me the fuck off. He's like because he's trying to pretend like he's still living at home because he's, you know, oh, you know, I need to, blah, blah, blah. I fucking moved out when I was 17 with a thousand bucks. I had saved up a thousand dollars $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $ $1,000, th,000, th, th, th, thousand bucks. I had saved up a thousand dollars and I had a car and I drove 400 kilometers south and then I started renting a place. Like you can't just skip renting or I mean he probably will because he's going to be like daisy cousins and live at home until he's like 30.

But like oh he will. You don't need to be like stuck at home for a couple of years before you can move out because of your stringent saving plan. My saving plan wasn't stringent. I turned out, fine. Absolutely fine. I have no problems. I broke a shit. I have no problems. He's also kind of missed the kind of gap here between I'm 18 and I'll stay at home for a few more years, a few more meaning like several at most. But he's gonna save up so that he can

move out and buy a house. Saving up to buy a house by yourself does not take like two years. That's also the most boring shit ever. He's just... it is the most boring shit ever and it's also it's the reason that all these people do live with their fucking parents until they're 30 now because they're trying to move straight from living at home to like buying a house. Home is cheap and there's food. It's fine. Oh I bet he's gonna say it's not fine. How boring. Don't you want to get out and see the world? Don't you want to disappear somewhere in your car for no reason other than you can? Don't you want to go out with your mates to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thooooooooooooooooooooooome. their their their their too out and see the world? Don't you want to disappear somewhere in your car for no reason other than you can? Don't you want to go out with your mates and drink while you can still avoid hangovers? The short answer is, they don't. So Caleb thinks he never

done any of these things. He has never done these things. I'm sure he had a Shandy on his 18th birthday like he posted on his trial. Well this this is what gets me is that it's like it's all just projection he's like they're less likely to date or go out without their parents. It was like that American conservative that wrote that article about how like friendship is fake. Oh, you don't have any friends. Cool. Yeah, like that's that's all the system. And now the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following the following. It's just, oh, you don't have any friends. Cool. Yeah, like, that's all the system. And now the following bit certainly says that to me as well.

Young people have lost ambition and a sense of wanting to have fun. And you can place the blame almost squarely at the feet of technology. It's sapped the excitement out of youth's lives. Now, apart from being a classic, you know, classic speaking example of like the editorial cartoon where everybody's just looking at their phones and they're all zombies or that kind of shit. He follows us up with a- What if we're slaves to iPhones? Did you think about that?

Whoa. Have you guys even seen Black Mirror? Jesus. I have- There's no need to catch up with your friends anymore because you can just flick them a message. You don't need to hop on a plane to see what the UK looks like. You can just search it on Google. What the fuck? Fuck me! I can't do it. I was thinking about going to Jamaica for holiday. Wait, no, I'm going to Google the word Jamaica. Look at the first two or three pages of Google results, close my laptop and go to bed.

I got bad news for both of you guys because you've just wasted a fucking ton of money going over to the moron. I should have googled it. I should have have the. What does America look like and save myself all this money? I have no doubt Ben that like those pictures you've been posting of like a majestic snow-capped mountain ranges in Colorado and stuff like that. I think the jokes on you because me, having looked at those photos via the internet, I have had the same experience that you had, but you had to pay for it. You've been to Colorado.

Yeah. Fuck. I just searched it on Google. My stuff came up. I'm very prominent in the taking photos of Colorado industry. Now, um, now, get ready for the most black mirror, um, big brain meme, sentence of all. We've become so obsessed with technology in the internet. We feel more connected than ever, yet when less connected than we've ever been.

Ooh. Wow. Okay, that's fuck. First of all, I'm starting to think Caleb had a bit of a joint at some point. Five million people have written that exact sentence with that exact punctuation before and felt very smug about it. And he is 18. For him, like less connected than we've ever been, his frame of reference extends back like three years. Yeah, what the fuck does he know? God I hate it. High speed internet on for his whole fucking life. He doesn't have another frame of reference. Well, like as high speed as it gets in Australia. Am I right? Quality of the internet here.

Not good. Now, it's worth noting at this point that there is a photo placed in the center of this piece. It is a screenshot of the television show The Young Ones. With a caption that says, the days of living in a grubby student sharehouse a-la-the-young ones are over. These days kids just don't leave home. Did you guys know that no one lives in sharehouses? Really? There's no sharehouses anymore. I'm truly shocked.

Truly shocked. Yep. Didn't he just say that he's waiting so that he can buy a house? To leave house, so he's not going to rent in a sharehouse? He thinks that he can just buy a house, he's going to travel and buy a house and that's going to work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work work that's Apparently. And like, so he has a job, right? I'm putting this in air quotes. But he writes like one column a week or whatever, like it can't be a full-time job. No.

All right, let me, let me hit you with this following passage, because I feel like this is going to really sketch out the details of what you guys are thinking about right this second. Uh, nobody wants to be an adult anymore. It's too much of a burden. I personally can't understand it. I want to spend as little time with my parents as possible. I want when my savings permit to visit places like the UK and the US. Maybe old work into state for a while. These are all natural feelings for a teenager to have. Oh my god.

Rebellion and freedom are supposed to be in our blood. Now, so, I'm getting rolled up. I'm curious. Which is getting steamed. Okay, so, so like, like we said, he's 18. He thinks he's going to live with his parents for a few more years, but that he will also have magically saved a deposit for buying a home by himself in that time. Yet also he thinks that once he has saved up enough money, he can go to places like the UK and the US.

As though doing those things, well as though doing those things will not immediately drain that savings account that he was using to save up for a fucking house. How much does he think it costs to like just fuck off to the UK in the US for a while? Like, I hate this nerd. I hate this nerd and his stupid plans and I'm going to visit such exotic places as the UK in the US. Fuck. Who's done that before? Don't make fun of that too much because that's literally what you and I have just done.

It's actually badass and extremely cool. So. Yeah, so like Caleb lives at home, he doesn't travel. He has a bullshit job and so far he does everything that he has criticized teens for doing. Okay, but I think somehow, what you're failing to take into account, you know, rebellion-wise, is his extensive fountain pen collection. That's true. He's got a lot of pocket squares, take that other teens. God, everything about him is just like, you know the Simpsons things things things things things things things things things things things things th th th th th th things th things th things thi things th things th things thi things thi thi thi thi thi, thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi thi thi that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the thi, thi. He thi. theat, theat, theat, theat, thi. that's that's that's that's thi. that, thi. thattake that other teens. God, everything about him is just like, you know the Simpsons thing with the bullies

and how they can like smell nerdswet and it brings out like the bully instinct. He was like designed in a lab to be the most bulliable person alive. Yeah, I think that's fair. Um, it's, it's so, well, rebellion is meant to be in a teen's blood and that is why Caleb is committing the ultimate rebellion, because as we all know, conservatism is the new punk. It is. This is what I've heard and I'm very triggered by it. I've heard from some very authoritative voices. Hmm. Now, it takes a turn, it gets a lot dumber.

It gets a lot dumber. Ready? It cars, yeah. Everything, we are told is now more dangerous than it was 40 years ago. Nah, except it isn't. Take driving, for instance. It's safer than it was 40 years ago. Nah, except it isn't. Take driving for instance. It's safer than it has ever been before. Cars are full of airbags, they have every safety warning and feature imaginable. Speed limits keep going down when in reality they should be going up. Oh my God, South Australia has kept a record of road death since 1950. Since then

our population is more than doubled, and yet we recorded our lowest road toll in history last year. Now, it's almost like all these things he's talking about are the reasons the road toll has gone down. Yeah, I feel like he might have gotten cause and effect a little bit fucked up here. Oh my god, this is so fucking stupid. Cars are safer, and yet less people thi- and yet, and the the the the the tolest, and yet, and the the tholest, and yet, and tholest, up here. Oh my god, this is so stupid. Cars are safer and yet less people die in cars. What the hell? He says, and we also subject teens to like the strictest conditions for driving imaginable. So he says, yeah, like, these days we have safer cars, we have airbags, speed limits are

lower, and we place much greater restrictions on young people driving. Also as he has raised previously, many, like, way less teens drive now than previously, and our road toll is much lower. Yet he's not connecting any of those things to the outcome of the lower road toll is much lower. Yet he's not connecting any of those things to the outcome of the lower road toll. I'm pretty sure that Queensland's looking at increasing speed limits in some places as well. Like I don't even know if that thing about speed limits going down is true. That's Queensland there, come on. It's a little different. Things are a little different up there. So, so he cannot put these things to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho tho tho the the the the the their the the tho the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tol. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tole. tol. Things are a little different up there.

So, so we cannot put these things together. He also says, and we can't let kids play unattended at the local park less they be snatched. Yet, abduction rates in Australia have declined since 1999. Oh my God. It's almost like when people stop constantly leaving the small children unattended in public places, there were less chances for people to snatch them. Like what I love about this is that all of these takes that he's just dumped steaming onto our chests are the, they're all the intellectual equivalent of the anti-vaccination logic

which is like well no one has polio or measles anymore so why do we have to be vaccinated against it? Like it's it's I don't understand who the fuck writes that down reads it back and goes yep gotcha got you truly a genius I cannot believe he's getting paid to write this. The boy wonder super genius. Caleb says, he finishes by saying, We have to let our children, perhaps even our adults, go. The world has become more boring and with it, it's young people.

Sadly, we're depriving them of the best time of their lives. Says the most boring fucking dude on the planet. I feel like he's projecting he's trying to make this world where teens are boring so that he can deal with his own fucking boring reality. Yeah, like all through the thing he's just like, it's the fault of parents for being wowsers and like sugar-coding shit for their children and wrapping them in bubble wrap and all this sort of shit. Although as Ben said, if you're a 17 or an 18-year-old you can just bail the fuck out if you don't like your parents. You can just leave. If you think your life is boring. No one can't tell you're an 18 year old and you want to leave, no one can, no one can actually stop you.

No one can stop you. It's almost like he is insulated in this little world of conservative bullshit. And has no idea about the real world. Yeah, and has also made a bunch of conscious decisions to do things like stay at home, saving money to buy a house instead of going out and doing all these things that he's saying kids are supposed to be doing but he is not. Incredible piece, incredibly dumb projection all the way through. Shout out to Caleb for that genius.

Shout out Caleb. Absolute genius piece. And one other thing that I feel like we kind of forgot to ever mention on the show or it never came up Was that there was also a really really great little instance of Caleb getting absolutely fucking bodied on Twitter When he was like oh well if it's North Korea's nukes versus America's nukes, I'm betting on America to win Bombs away and he got he got ratioed like... He got ratioed like I've never seen before. It was incredible. Yep. It was just thousands of

people replying to him to say, hey, shut the fuck up. Why would anyone want anyone to get nuke? Go join the military if you love that shit. You're 18, you're allowed. I think he should join the military. I think he should go join the army and fucking get nuked. See the world, get some experiences that teens used to get when they weren't snowflakes. Yeah, murdered on a battlefield somewhere. Yeah, go. Yeah. Dying of dissetry in a ditch somewhere. Yeah, go do that.

He also wrote a piece about how he wasn't mad that he had been bodied like that, which is great. He wrote a whole piece about how, um, is my tweet really the real problem that we need to worry about in the world? People like no, but we can shit on you and care about other stuff at the same time. Oh, just, just staggering. Just staggering stuff. I'm excited for him to continue to be employed up until the point that he just becomes a really grotesque looking adult and most of his acne fades and then people can't remember why they were hiring him because he's not like a precocious teenage conservative anymore.

I'm excited for, I mean this is a, this is something that I will never actually get to see the fruition of, I just know that it will happen. He will never talk about it, he will never write about it, he will never admit it, but in like five or six years time, he's going to look back on the things that he is writing now as an 18-a 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18 18, and feel, and feel, and feel, to to to to to to to to to to to th. Hea th. Hea, thi. Hea, thi, he's, he's, to, he's, thi, he's, he's, he's, he's to, he's to, he's to, he's to, he's to, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he... to, he. time, he's going to look back on the things that he is writing now as an 18-year-old and feel an unbelievably deep well of shame and embarrassment at the dumb shit that they published of his. Can you imagine? I almost feel bad for him. Like, if I fucking think of the opinions that I had when I was 18, my complete inability

to string a sentence together or a logical chain of thoughts. If someone th th tho tho tho tho th tho tho th, I tho tho the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the 18, my complete inability to string a sentence together or a logical chain of thoughts. If someone put that out in the public eye, it's so fucking irresponsible, it's insane. Like, you're just goading someone's fucked up stupid hubris. It's unethical. Well I feel like we were talking at some point in the past. I mean, it's like someone putting all of Lucy's scene photos out on the internet in one go.

Which are her photos from now? They should not do. Photos from like six months ago. No, I feel like we were talking a little while ago about how like a lot of young men, you know, in their sort of, I'm going to say, late teens to early 20s, particularly like young white guys, I can definitely say this for myself, we'll have that experience where you like, you watch like Bill Hicks for the first time, and you suddenly get some fucking Hicks for the first time and you know you suddenly

get some fucking strong experiences about the establishment and the man and everybody being a bunch of brainwashed sheeple. It's just a ride man. Yeah, you think, well, and you think that like libertarianism is a good idea because you're like, I just want to mind my business and be left alone so why should should anyone be involved in anything? Everyone should be free to make whatever racist jokes they want, because it's just words, all that kind of shit. And then you like live your life a little bit more and you get a little bit of a taste of what actually living in the real fucking world is like, and you go, oh, that's right, because people should actually try and make some kind of effort to get along and not live in a horrifying hellscape.

But even that shit is for like, left-wing people, you know, have those sorts of moments of like, oh, I believe this shit for a while there, and that was fucking embarrassing. Yeah. Imagine you had been like a young conservative columnist. Oh God. Oh God. That's a nightmare. I would have been an edge lord.

Oh, absolutely. Well, there, yeah, well, there but for the grace of God go, all of us not being teenagers during a time when you might accidentally become radicalized to be a Kekestani because you're just in it, you're in it for the lulls. Yeah, I think the only reason that I managed to escape turning into Caleb Bond is that despite holding opinions pretty similar to his, I was too busy like listening to KMFDM and watching YouTube videos about Area 51 to write about political opinions. Oh man. Which I've been to now by the way.

Just want to put that out there? Been area 51? Well, I've been to the gates. I went up to the gates of area 51. I didn't, you know, they shoot you if you try to go inside. Hmm. It's just next to area 52, isn't it? Shut the fuck up. It's very important to be.

So, so you think it's the real Area 51? Well, I don't think there are aliens in it. It is an Air Force base that was designated Area 51. You're sure it's not just like some fake gates that they've put up and put Area 51 on it? So, like, just a... Yeah. Yeah. All right. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's it's. It's it's it's. It's. It's. It's it's. It's. It's. It's, it's. It's, it's, it's, it's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's not, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, it's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th, it's th, it's th. It's th. It's that's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. So, th. It's th. It's not just like some fake gates that they've put up and put area 51 on it. So it's like just a yeah yeah all right it's not like a false flag area 51 base you know well I mean if it is they went to a lot of effort it was fucking scary it was like really weird like I drove down to Dirt Road for probably like 40 minutes to get there and then when you get to the end of the dirt road there's just like the signs and th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th and th thi thi thi th and thi thi thi thi tho- tho-I tho-I tho-I tho-I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the their their their th their their th their th their th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is the the the the the the thir the the thir the thir throooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-soo-soe their the the to get there. And then when you get to the end of the dirt road, there's just like the signs. And then this weird like armoured rotating camera thing.

And then there's some guys in a Ute. Very good. Sitting up on a hill, staring directly at you, like wearing military gear, holding fucking guns. And I'm just like... Oh, they're just, they're just militia guys. It's probably what that was, there were three percenters. It was really weird and like there's a whole bunch of signs on it being like,

do not take photos of anything here and I was like, because I basically drove down there to get a picture of a gate to vary at 51. So I was like holding my phone in a weird way try and to to to to toitiously take a photo and then I got too scared to those turned around and drove back. The signs worked. The signs did work. That might have still been a fake though. You what you pay two people to like nap in a car, you put up some razor wire and then, you know, across the other side country. Oh, they might all have been. I didn't see them move. Fuck. You outsmarted. The mine was not smart enough. I didn't see through their rooms. They're crafty. You've got to be crafty if you're trying to throw all the old UFO hunters off the trail.

Ooh, that reminds me. So a bonus episode that came out last week is, well, it'll be last week when people listening to this, whatever. Who knows how time works? A bonus episode was that Theo and I did a commentary track for the Wayans Brothers film, Little Man. That's a horrifying journey. But you can put that along on a speaker, you know, listen listen along to us trying to understand what the hell is happening as you watch a movie and If people dig it and some people have already watched the whole thing and let us know

But if people dig it, you know, we'll keep doing a few more movies. I know that at the very least I'm going to make Lucy do a commentary track for white chicks with me. Oh, please,. Sounds fantastic. Hell yes. And there was another movie that I saw. I'm picking things sort of like on Netflix so that people can can pretty easily get a hold of them. And there was another movie that I saw on their documentary called Australian. Oh I watched that. Australians guys. It's real weird. It's real low budget, real Australian. It's real, the thi-s-ci-chicks. It's that I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I thi. I thi. I's thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I I I th. I I I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I'm thi. I'm that. E. Australians guys. It's real weird. It's real low budget, real Australian. It's a, yeah. So can you and me do that, Ben? Yeah, absolutely. I'm pretty sure it's, um, it opens at like, it's a really shitty Queensland train station where they like meet their first UFO expert. Like, I'm pretty sure it's quite close to Brisbane as well. It's it was like Ipswich or

something it was fucking yeah it's some quality Australian content. Yeah so my understanding of it is that it is a guy a guy who is a kooky UFO expert dude and he talks to a whole bunch of Australians who claim to have cited UFOs about their experiences and I'm really interested in seeing like what a what the kind of differences between an Australian UFO cook and American one, you know? I would like to I would like to take in some of that. So I think at the very least we will do commentary tracks for those two films until to take in some of that. So I think at the very least we will do commentary tracks for those two films until people

start saying we do not care for this and we're not listening to them. We're not slaves to these people. That's true. If we want to make content that no one listens to, let's do it. That's all right. We are the content creators. We'll do it. So, moving on. There is something else that I wanted to have a bit of a chat about.

And we won't do the whole reading series thing with it because it's very long and more than anything else it's fucking mortifying. It's an article that came out a couple of weeks ago in Quadrant Magazine, written by a huge piece of shit called Jeffrey Luck. I know that a bunch of people saw it when it came out, and I also know that it's something that it's genuinely really hate-filled and horrible and incredibly hurtful, you know, particularly to queer people based on the content. I mean, personally, I found it shocking and disgusting,

and it's not even about me. So I can't imagine what it'd be like to have your own sexuality discussed in this fashion, in an actual publication in Australia in 2017. So, you know if if you are listening to this and you think that it's going to be really really gross and upsetting for you to listen to, please feel free to not listen to it. So yeah we're not going to do the whole thing but I just kind of wanted to pick through some bits and pieces of it. So yeah, I don't know if either of you have read this.

Lucy, you said you haven't read it? I have not read this. I skim read it when I was insanely high the other night because I was, I had eaten a bunch of edibles and I was waiting until they kicked in a bit more to put a movie on. So I was looking at Twitter and then someone had linked to this and I started reading it was too high to understand it. So a short version of what I just said is no. Kind of, I kind of read it. I saw some words.

My eyes were pointed at a thing with these words on it. They were definitely looking at a screen as my face made various shapes. So, um, yeah, look, like on one hand, as we've said about some stuff in the past, I think that to a certain extent when you repeat or talk about this kind of absolute shit, you are, you know, giving voice to it and all that sort of stuff. But I also think that this is an important thing to talk about in the context that it's a really pure illustration of exactly what people said this postal survey was going to bring out, exactly what people said that this sort of stuff was going to dredge up, which is that, you know,

this stuff has all stopped being any kind of debate in quotes about same-sex marriage, and it's not a yes or no question about whether or not people think that, you know, same-sex marriage should be legalized. It's very quickly turned into just an avenue for people to come out and express their most deep-seated hate-filled bigotry about people that are different to them People have been given license to do it. We've already seen a lot of really public gross examples of stuff like there's been you know a lot of reports of people being harassed and you know having all sorts of horrible shit said to them.there's a lot of like defacing of posters and all that sort of stuff. You only need to look at the comments on any kind of conservative article about any of this

stuff to see some really hideous shit. Where this stood out for me is that this is an article that somebody wrote, somebody else edited and somebody else approved the publication of in what it's supposed to be like a, you know, the Journal of Conservative Thought in Australia in 2017. So yeah, we'll just pick through a bit of this just to give you a taste of like... Worth pointing out that Quadrant is the magazine that, uh, so delightfully, uh, published what was essentially a bomb threat on the magazine that so delightfully published what was essentially a bomb threat on the ABC. Oh yeah. When was that? So this is immediately after the Manchester bombing, they had a line in an article from their online editor, Roger Franklin that had the paragraph, had there

been a shred of justice, that blast would have detonated in an Ultimo TV studio, which is where the ABC headquarters are, unlike those young girls in Manchester, their lives snuffed out before they could begin, none of the panels likely casualties would have represented the slightest reduction in humanity's intelligence, decency, empathy, or honesty. Good of a cunt that guy. Because we all know, yeah, we all know that you can't just wish that an act of terrorism didn't happen, you have to pick another audience that you would have preferred that it happened too. Absolutely. That's a normal reaction. It's a very normal reaction. So Jeffrey Luck has written this awful screed titled, Sodom and Tomorrow.

Huh? Oh, okay. Okay, that doesn't even really rhyme. Like, Tomorrow does not rhyme with Gamora. Well, no. It's a terrible headline. But you figured out what it was meant to be, didn't you? Yeah, but that was on like the 10th rating of it. Hmm. So, uh, so yeah, the subhead to this is, don't be misled by those determined to see the word marriage redefined as if it all starts and stops at sponge sugar same-sex couples atop wedding cakes. This is a totalitarian movement champing at the bit for a yes victory.

After that, the real remaking of society can begin. He, to really, to really subtly showcase his views. For an image for this article, they have chosen the notorious Bill Leak cartoon depicting gay people as as the SS. I don't want to brag here but I'm in I'm quoted in Bill Leak's Wikipedia page condemning cartoon. Nice yeah they call me a comedian ha. Oh very flattering. Very flattering. Fantastic. Nice. Yeah, they call me a comedian. Ha! Oh, very flattering. Very flattering.

Yeah, and of course it's worth, as always, noting that Bill Leak is dead and I'm glad about it. I'm glad he's not making cartoons. If it had happened by both of his hands being broken or by some other method, you know, that whatever, I just, I'm glad that I never have to see another Bill Leak cartoon. I never have to see a new one. Well, look, as I said on this very show, when he passed away, he's falling off heaven's balcony.

Falkennyn, every time. So, you know, he opens, this guy opens this piece by the the the time. So, yep. So, you know, he opens, this guy opens his piece by saying, no one else volunteered, so let me be the one to bell the cat. The LGBTQIA people are not normal. So why should the vast, why should the vast bulk of the population be coerced into overturning the long-accepted the idea of marriage to placate them? So, in his first, in his little subheading, he refers to the movement to the movement to the movement to to the movement to to to the movement as to to to to the movement as to to to to to to to the movement, to the movement,accepted idea of marriage to placate them. So in his first, in his little subheading, he refers to the movement as being totalitarian, but then in the second paragraph he dismisses them as being a fractional minority.

Yes. I'm not, I don't really, I don't see the through line there. How are they, if they... Well, a bit further in the article he breaks down like the population state. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the, th. th. th. th. the, th. th. th. th. th. the, th. th. th. thi, the, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He's, th. th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, toge. So, toge, th. So, th. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, the through line there. How are they saying... Well a bit further in the article he breaks down like the the population stats of saying like you know trying to figure out how many people are actually in same-sex relationships and he says oh it's actually a really really small percentage of the population so how come there's this massive social movement in support of it it doesn't make any sense as though anybody who is straight could not possibly fathom the idea of of the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the population the population the population the population of the population population the population the population of the population of the population of the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the population the the the the the the the population the the the the population the the the the the population the the the the the population the the the thethough anybody who is straight could not possibly fathom the idea of supporting equality for other people, like he actually cannot process that idea.

He thinks it's some massive, like, sociopolitical, like brainwashing thing that's taken place, where people all think that they are obliged to support that movement. They all think that they have to do it, otherwise this stuff's going to happen to happen th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thoomoomoomoomoom-a, thi, thi, thi, thi, their their their their their, their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they are obliged to support that movement. They all think that they have to do it, otherwise this stuff's going to happen, as opposed to people just thinking, hey, I think that all the people in my society should have the same rights as me regardless of their sexuality. But apparently that is not a thing that he can process. Well in his defense. I mean, empathy is a very, very hard thapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap very hard th, thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, that is a that is a thi, thi, that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. theat the. the. thi. that that that that that that that is a that is a that that thing to understand if you don't have it. Yes, well, well, I guess so. So, you know, he opens the piece with what you know is always going to be a really, really

great solid grounds for something, which is to start, start quoting the dictionary definitions of stuff. So he starts banging out the dictionary definitions of like the word normal so that he can wind up coming down to things like average common common regular routine standard. And in a special subcategory balanced healthy, rational, reasonable, sane, stable, well-adjusted, free from mental or emotional disorder. The very obvious implication there. He says, quote, the word that stands out in that list is of course natural, because LGBTQA

people are not normal, they are not natural. No, it's fucking full on. It's really full on. Nobody can argue that, except for the few tragic accidents we all start out in life as one sex or the other, little boys or little girls. Male or female. Natural. Hang a mo. Is the few tragic accidents there are a reference to intersex people?

Uh, yep. Okay. Tragic accidentssex people is that what? Yep. Okay. Tragic accidents. I don't know if... Yep. All right. Oh like it it's it's way off the fucking deep and he also says quote there can be no disputing that some born as boys or girls discover or develop unnatural impulses abnormal abnormal characteristics that set them apart from the majority. It's fucking insane. It's like full on, it's full on like old-timey brain science stuff. It's, it's, it's, and this is again, this is why I've bought it up, not, because I'm just so absolutely stunned that not only has some old piece of shit written this but someone else has gone Yep Look at least at least they're being honest with their views rather than the old

You know it's just okay to say no Well, you make an interesting point there because um friend of the show Rick Morton wrote a piece of a couple of weeks ago that he was of course, of course covered in abuse for from this sort of crowd for saying, you know, I wonder why so many people who can't support same-sex marriage can't just admit that the reason that they can't is because they're just disgusted. Yeah. I really went about like, Erica Betts, for example, I wrote about this an article I did for pedestrian,

but if you look at his voting record, he heavily campaigned when he was first elected as a senator to keep homosexuality criminalized in Tasmania. Wow. He led that push. It's farcical. He was one of those people who like, who'd likened it to beastiality and all that sort that, I, I, that, that, that, th, th th thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they, I, I, I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, for thi, for thi, for thia, for thia, for thia, I thi, I, I thi, I thi, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I thi, thi, thi, they they they they they thi, they they thi, thi, they thi, thi, thi, they're thi, they're thi, thiiiiiiiiioli, thi, thioli, thi, thi, thi, th Oh, and he was, he was one of those people who like, who'd likened it to beastiality and all that sort of stuff, wasn't it? So you look at it now, how are you meant to treat this false pretense that it's for, you know, all these other bullshit reasons, just be like, you wish that they got thrown in jail for it. We're not going to pretend now you're doing it. Yeah, you know, like it's so fucking stupid, but none of them will admit it. They will like reach so far to come up with these completely bullshit insane reasons where it's just fags are yuck. That's their argument. Well, and here's where this guy differs because he has pretty much explicitly written,

fags are yuck in this piece. Allow me to read you another quote. Quotes, the tolerance of the unnatural has gradually extended to those who cohabit with another of the same sex, although for many, it has meant swallowing hard. Demonstrative same-sex kissing, so blatantly favored by ABC producers, to illustrate any story on the marriage debate is cringe worthy for many.

Those who squirm at such scenes try not to imagine the amorous performances of same-sex couples. The great majority turned their faces away from these unnatural sexual practices in disdain if not disgust. Yet the normalized Australian population is asked to accept these manifestations of love as supposedly equal to that of ordinary, standard, well-adjusted, male-female attraction. What the fuck? Again, it is incredible to me that this magazine has published a piece which is, again, a man just explicitly saying

Like he's gone back to just some straight up Like like queer people are freaks They're clearly, you know, yeah, just just abnormal freaks that we're all being asked to accept and treat as though they're normal people when according to the Oxford English dictionary They are not because he's just a really he's a really he's a really thrown. He's a really normal guy who just sees people. to to to to to to to to to to to to th. He's th. He's thi the the the he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he's he's he's he's he's he's hee hee hee hee hee he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's the the the the the the he's he's the he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's the Oxford English dictionary, they are not. Because he's just a really, he's a really normal guy who just sees people kissing and just starts imagining amorous love making. Immediately. He can't see two men do a tasteful peck on the ABC without imagining one of them getting just rammed, fucking destroyed.

God, they're obsessed with the gay sex they're obsessed with it in a really unnatural way. I mean aren't we all? Well like it's it's like as I have seen many gay people comments about Lyle Shelton over the years man that dude thinks about gay people having sex way more than gay people do. That's true. Yeah, so, yeah, the whole thing is quite incredible to me. It just goes on and on.

He does say, as I was, as I was alluding to a second ago, he starts to break down the figures of like the previous census results. 2011, uh, Census figures, uh, the to a second ago, he starts to break down the figures of like the previous census results. 2011 census figures show same-sex couples made up for both the fact own declared husband and wife show a total of 33,714 couples. This represents only 0.37% of the 9 million couples in the country. Such a proportion immediately raises the question of how such a tiny minority could have produced such a powerful campaign for change. It's almost like not everybody is a huge bigoted shithead.

Yeah, it's also like fucking insane to, an insane way to do statistical analysis of how many same sex couples there are as well, because you like you look at you know so 9 million 148,000 couples in Australia right these this is ranging from people who've just got married to people that got married in like the fucking 40s you know these are people that got married in the context where being in a same-sex couple just wasn't even an option. You know, like, of course there's going to be less now. People are still like in the closet.

People are, you know, like, it's not that far accepted. Like, it's the same thing when they report on the stats of like how many people say that they're gay polling on how many people are queer and how many people are, it's going to be like 50-50. And they will all get to bully all the straight people and it's going to be great. Finally, yeah. Finally. Well, he even makes reference within this piece to, um, a new political obstacle to the holy

grail of same-sex marriage had to be overcome when increasing numbers of divorces like Christine Forster, Tony Abbott's sister, took their children into lesbian relationships or created same-sex families by adoption or IVF like Penny Wong. So he's even talking about people, yeah, from like right now, who are leaving what would have been thought of as guys like this as a as just a normal heteromarriage and going, actually I've been gay this whole time and now I'm going to do what I actually want to do and would make me happy. But yeah, like that, so that's not even like a thing that's, that's like just started happening or anything. Or is just about to stop happening. So anyway, oh, my goodness, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, as, thness, as, as, as, as thi. thi, as, as thi, as just, as thi, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just just, as just just just, as just just just, as just just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as just, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a, as a th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi, as a thi, as thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that's that's like just started happening or is just about to stop

happening or anything. So anyway, he closes his big dumb piece of shit article by saying beware Australia, very normal stuff, beware Australia that this is a totalitarian movement on the march but as to the so-called tides of history argument there is no such thing as inevitability. Not so long as there is free choice and free speech. Fucking free speech. I wish there was no speech. That we, we kind of, we went past that is just, the fucking things these people complain about is absolutely amazing. Um, the Stonewall in right in New York in 1969 The fucking things these people complain about is absolutely amazing.

The Stonewall in riot in New York in 1969 when police rated gay bar changed everything. It led to the formation of the Gay Liberation Front and the origins of the radical gay rights movement. Significantly, the public appropriation of the old English word gay was part of the political campaign to normalize homosexual activities in the public mind. Then came color. First the purple of gay pride, then the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thexxxxxxxxaxaxaxaxatrinxaxxaxaxat.exat.exxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxeea. thea. theaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaeaea. the public mind, then came color. First, the purple of gay pride, then the annexation of the rainbow, the symbol of God's promised to know it. The fucking faggots took purple and they took our rainbows. There's a... And they took the... And they took the date of carnival to do their gay Mardi Gras. Yeah which everyone else otherwise would have have have have have have have have have have have have have have have have have have their to do their gay Marty Gras. Yeah, which everyone else otherwise would have been observing lent. There's a there's a really good bit of Fry and

Laurie sketch talking about how the homosexuals have taken the word gay and then it's just them going through like a series of like how you can't say poof anymore you can't say homosexual anymore you can't love like, yeah it's, it's quite good. YouTube, search, bit of fry and lorry and gay. That'll get you there. There you go. So look, I think we can, we can round out the show by saying, as we have said a number of times now, a really huge, fuck you to Malcolm Turnbull for being so fucking weak. Lily Livered, if you will, that he's let this all happen

because it's easier than actually trying to do something. You know, it's easier than trying to deal with his own big piece of shit party that he very clearly doesn't even want to lead. Imagine just being in a club and everybody in the club fucking hated you and you were the club's president. And you spent all day just trying to sort out fights between people in the club.

And both sides of each of the fights just thought you were kind of shitty. And everyone outside the club also thought you were shitting. Nobody likes you and you're going to die in 30 years lying on your bed, remembering how you inflicted a nationwide campaign of hate on vulnerable people because you are lagging in the polls because you are poorly chosen as the leader of the party. Yep. Everyone outside the clubhouse is like, why the fuck is he in that club? Everybody hates him in that club. Yeah, look, just such a huge stupid waste, a massive waste of money. It's turned out exactly how everybody predicted it would, which is that it has just opened the floodgates for people to do nothing but basically speculate on

whether or not they think queer people should even just be allowed. Not if they should be allowed to be married, let's just cut off the to be married part of the sentence. It's just been, hey random dipshits, are you okay with gay people existing? Yeah, it's been a huge disappointment every day. I can't wait for it to be over. Either way that it works out, they're still going to continue on disingenuously. They'll probably refuse to actually enact the results if it's a yes. And if it's a no, they'll say, see, no more gay people. And then act like they don't have to do anything about it for the

rest of the term or until Malcolm Turnbull is thrown out. Yep. Regardless of how this plans out, we know we're going to get it eventually. It just sucks that we have to go through this process. And all we can do right now to make ourselves feel better about it is if you are even slightly gay in any fashion, please make out with everyone that is the same gender as you in public, all the time. On camera, as much as you can, as much as you can be gay, remind them that you can the as you can be gay, remind them that you exist,

that there's fucking millions of us, and that they really can't do anything, because the tide of history is going to watch them thi them them them them them thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, theeeeeeean. thean. thean. thean, thean. thean. theeeeeeeeeeee. the, th exist, that there's fucking millions of us, and that they really can't do anything because the tide of history is going to watch them out to see where they will hopefully be eaten by Wales like Noah from the Bible. Wait, not like Noah the other one, Jonah, that one. Yeah. And let me say this, as a straight person and an ally, if I see you making out in public, I'm gonna picture you fucking and I'm gonna like it. Hell yeah, dude. Hell yeah, thank you for your service. Oh, I'm gonna picture you going to fucking town on each other. I close my eyes, a light smile is gonna come over my face.

If you see me, if you see me and I'm like leaning back in my chair, or like a beat-ad-hivic expression on my face, I look pleased. You know what's going on? A light smile. I'm loving it. Yeah. Yeah, like I'm thinking about you guys fucking plowing. So that's that's just part of how I'm going to play my partner. Thank you for your allorship. Yeah. All right folks. So we're going to leave it there.

It has been very nice to be with you two again. Lucy is back now. Then is back for good in another, what, three or four weeks? About three weeks, yeah. All right. So we'll catch you when we can. And then when you're back, we'll have everybody on their nice new microphones, which I am on. I've posted one to Lucy. It has vanished into the ether.

It has vanished. I believe Theo has mine. Yeah. And he's probably put it up his butt hole. Yes. Well, he said he was going to record himself farting into the microphone. Well, close. I just know that it will have been either inside or very near his butt hole. Yep. Ypunta Cranpa past of the week is is is the week is the week is the week is the week is the week the week thi thi thi thi thi thi thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thuu thu thu thu thu thu thus. It thus. It's thus. It's thus. It's thus. It's th. It's th. It's thus. It's thus. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It is. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's thi. It's thi. thi. It's thi. tho. tho. It's thoooooooooooo. It's the. It's thoooooo'. It's the. It's the. It's inside or very near his butt-hole. Yep. Yuppunta Cranpass of the week is to Wedgie Caleb Bond if you see him out in the town. Absolutely. Tell him to tell him to spend his fucking savings on buying a convertible and moving out of his parents house. Tell him he's a nerd. He should drink and drive and speed without his seat belt on because all these safety measures we've got going too

bloody far. Yeah. Tell him, you know, he needs to take a good friend of the show, Nikki, Wine Mum on Twitter. He needs to take her up on her invitation to, you know, come out for a couple of drinks. She'll get you a little tipsy. You know, she might show you a good time, Caleb. Have a drink, Caleb. Don't goost go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go to go. to go. to go. to go. to go to go to go. to go. to go. to go. to go. to go. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the thi. the the the the the. the the the the the the the. the the the the. the the the. the. the. thi. to thi., she might show you a good time, Caleb. Have a drink, Caleb. Don't be a pussy. Yeah, don't, don't go sneaky on Twitter. Just take her up on the offer. We've already established that that Daisy cousins is dating a notorious racist. So she's off the market. She's off the market. Dresen up in a weird, fucking goth, gosset.

Milk made outfit. Nighties us, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, fucking, Buffy, fucking, Buffy, fucking, Fffffffff, fucking, fucking, fucking, F, fucking, fucking, F, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, sneaky, don't, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, th, th, sneaky, th, th, th, th, sneaky, th, th, th, th, th, th, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, sni, sni, sni, sni, sni, sni, sni, sni, sni. S- sni. Sicky, sneaky, sni, sni, sneaky, sni, sneaky weird fucking Goth, corset shit. Fuckin' milkmaid outfit. Nah, it needs us, fucking Buffy, the vampire slayer, fucking bad guy, bullshit. That's it. So, instead, you know, you've got to take the invitations where you can get them. Right? So on that note, we will leave you folks. Fuck you, Malcolm Turnbull, and we'll see you on the bonus episode checks out on

Patreon if you would like to get any extra shit from us which apparently will very soon include a commentary track for the beautiful film White Chicks yay All right see you everybody.