Boonta Vista - EPISODE 206: Dr Mario, OB/GYN

Episode Date: July 2, 2021

This week it's: A terrible Guardian article that's maybe about post-pandemic sex, a swan-based life-after-death experience, the debut of Theo Sees, and the amazing names of NASCAR.

Is that the signal or are you preparing to... Oh my God. Oh, oh my goodness. Oh, I mean, I feel like this maybe needs to be described for the listener in that Andrew has just necked an entire beer in one go, which would be maybe impressive and cool if he'd done it out of any other drinking vessel than the tiny flute of beer that he has been drinking. All champagne flute of beer. I don't know what size this is. It's maybe a pot. That's a tow of beer. Yeah. That's the South Australian system. One toe. Thank you very much.

I think it is like maybe 250 mils of beer. A cup of beer. A cup of beer. A cup of the cup of Cass. It's no good. All right. I'm going to do the intro now. So smooth. Hello and welcome to Puerto Vista episode 206.

I am Ben and I am here in the offices of a more successful version of this podcast. I am currently on the phone with one of our reporters who is standing in a field with a zoom recorder trying to get a good recording of horse diarrhea. It's Theo. Hey, how you're you going. Yeah, so we're using sort of like a Like a shotgun mic or you maybe going for more of a condenser type situation like do you want a little bit of the The noise of the field itself or we're gonna get two different recordings here. So what I found is that? The secret is two microphones. You want one for the blast and then another one sort of on the for the plops? No, no, no sort of on the undercarriage. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the the th. the th. the th. S-ca-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. Sot-s. Sotgu-s. Sot-s. Sotgu-s. Sotgun. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. Sot-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. S-s. S-s-s. S-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s. S-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sit-sit-sit-shot-shot-shot-shot-shot-shot-sot-shot-shotchonononononononononotgoogea-shot-shot-shot-sit-sit-shot-s. S want one for the blast and then another one sort of on the... For the plops? No, no, sort of on the undercarriage, on the landing gear of the horse if you will.

Sorry, the landing gear of the horse. Yeah. If a horse was going to land, I would assume it would use its legs. Yeah, right on the horse thorax there. And that gives you two resonant modes. And for the, for the, the, the, the, the, the, the visuals, the visuals, for the visuals, for the visuals, for the visuals, for the visuals, for the visuals, for the visuals, for the visuals, for the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thoaughaughaughaugha thoomcarcarcarcarcarcarcarcarcaraugh, under under under under under under under under under under under under under under the the the the thorough, the thorough, thorough, thorough, thorough, the the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, for the, for the horse thorax there and that gives you two resonant modes and for the for the visuals I'm of course using a GoPro. Yep because that's less important. That's more about the sound. I gotta distract that in my head and like get right up right up there and waterproof as well. Yeah, that's very important. That's what you need. Very important, yeah. With me here back in the office is our head of marketing.

It's currently trying to decide whether the video talent for our upcoming ads should be Dolph Lundgren or Jean Claude Van Dam. It's Andrew. It's Andrew. It's me. Yeah, I think it should be Jean-Claude. I mean, um... I was thinking Duff. Yeah, but boy, doesn't he just look like a big Easter Island head at this point?

The man looks like he's lived a... he's lived a fast life. My man. You know? He's seen a lot of California sunshine. And you think that fast lives increase your head size? No more whether or not you look like you have been like carved out of stone or perhaps made from leather. The finest Corinthian leather but leather nonetheless.

Sort of two classically very similar substances. I think if you may be filled Iggy pop with a sort of dense liquid, you would kind of end up with the shape of Dolf Lundgren, and I believe he's tan because you're stretching the skin out would get less intense than you'd arrive at Dolfo Lundgrin's skin tone. Yeah, so we're talking about, I guess, skinning the skin, and filling it with cement. Oh no, I was just thinking of just putting a hole at the top of Iggy Pop and leaving it so the the liquid that you're putting in there to pad Iggy Pop out is going in between his muscles and his skin. Yeah. Yeah, and then he expands like a kind of sponge. Yes, yeah very much so. Now you get it. Also with us here, last but not least, is our in-house girl boss, CEO, who is celebrating a few early wins in the fight to make sure that

the office doesn't unionize. It's Lucy. Hi, Lucy. Yes, Queen. Yes. Oh, what's up? Are you unionizing? Are you unionizing? I'm just getting a vibe that you look like you want to be unionizing and I just, I just wanted to sit down and have a chat. I just want to touch base. And say why that would be a bad idea? Yeah, yeah, that's right. Or do you just, do you just want to know if we are planning so that you can, I guess do something? Yeah, just so I just want to have a to know where you're going. to to know, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. toe. toe. to to to to the want to know I want to know how you're going, how you're feeling. That's how I run a tight ship here at the Better Buntavista Company. I want to know what your birth sign is. I want to know what your rising sign is. Yeah, you're unionizing. The union is kind of the patriarchy so, uh, if you guys want to want to do that, you know, go ahead. But, sort sort, it, it, it, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, if, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, uh, I want, I want, uh, I want, I want, I want, I the the the the the the the the the their, I, I, I, I the the the the the the the the their, I the the their, I, I the their, I their. Uh, I's. Uh, I's. Uh, I's. Uh, I's. Uh, I'm, th. Uh, th. th. Uh, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Uh, th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. Uh, th. Uh, the the the th. to do that, you know, go ahead. But it's sort of not the way we can. That's definitely, definitely unionizing risks.

Sort of a lot of vibes we're going for here. I think it's pronounced virgin. There are two Virgos here in the podcast. Virgios. Virgues catchphrase, that's right. Oh dear. That would have been a great place to seamlessly transition into the the next the next the next the next the next the the the the the the the the the the the the th., th. the the the the th. th. th. the, the, the, the, the, the, to, thi, that, to, to, definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely, definitely, to that's, that's, that's, that's, definitely, that's, that's, that's, that's, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. I, the. I, the. I thean, thean, thean, definitely thean, definitely thean, definitely thean, definitely thean, definitely thean, definitely, thean, definitely thi. I thi. great place to seamlessly transition into the next segment there. Oh, it sure would have been.

I was kind of waiting to find out what your role was been. Oh, I'm just here. I'm still me in this scenario. I have the same. Right. Yeah, the same job. I do the posts. Exactly the same. I edit the podcast. We didn't hire someone else to do that for some th so th so thia tho tho tho tho that for tho that for tho tho tho tho tho tho that for some tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho. tho tho- tho- tho. the. tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho podcast we didn't hire someone else to do that for some reason even though it seems like we could have sort of like a legacy hire yeah I'm just grandfathered in from the from the from the shittier podcast to this good podcast you're fully casual no sick leave I wrote all of the early code for this podcast and we haven't actually done any sort of refactoring or updating of it. I'm the only one that understands it.

They can't get rid of me. But also, I won't let them hire anyone else to work on it because they would have to be trained how to do it and then they could fire me. So. And you know what that? No, I'll just be here forever, I guess. Well, unfortunately, now that we do have Lucy as a new CEO, it means that she will no longer be able to fulfill her role as Dr. Lucy in the paging Dr. Lucy segment in which she gives advice. So this is going to be the very last one. Before that role is taken over by a, I don't know,

a 17-year-old unpaid intern? That sounds great to me. If we can do an unpaid. Such a great opportunity. Yep. They have to be 17? So much exposure. You know? A lot of exposure.

I think Andrews just preparing for the Seinfeld podcast that he's going to record after this one. That is true that he dated a high school girl, isn't it?, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he just, he just, he just, he just, he just, he just, he just, he just, he just, he's just, he's just, he's just, that he's just, that he, that he's just, that he's just, that he's, that he, that he, that he, that he, that he, that he, that he, that he's, that he's, that he's, that he, th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to record after this one. That is true that he dated a high school girl, isn't it? He just did that. I just want to clarify we are talking about Jerry Seinfeld, not me. Not Andrew himself. It is true about Andrew who we're now speaking about as if he's not here. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, Seinfeld.

And it was like, I'm pretty sure it was at the peak of Seinfeld the show being really popular. He could have just gotten himself like any old girlfriend. He could have. He's cheering Seinfeld. There's heaps of other like ages of woman. There's 23, 24, 27, 31, 32, 35, thirty-five, you know. 65, you can go either way. So, uh, so it was 1993. He was 39 years old and she was a... and she was a 17-year-old, I guess high school student at that that is really gross. And she was a 17-year-old, uh, I guess high school student at that point.

That is really gross. And that is absolutely heinous, but I was kind of distracted by the fact that Theo just has to untangle his headphones from a cat. Hmm. Some of the... She's begging for food. Some of the follies of podcasting. Shoshana Lonstine was a senior at the prestigious Nightingale Bamford School on the upper west side when on a spring afternoon she was approached by one of the most well-known comedians in the country. It appears unclear if Flonstine knew exactly who she was talking to at the time, but after a short conversation... Could have been anyone. She gave her phone number to the comedian sparking a relationship that would begin around her high school graduation.

That's so gross.rible, terrible man. It's so funny though. So many great gags. Do you think of his most famous bits? Yep. I'm thinking I'm thinking about him. I'm laughing.thinking about, you know, food on a plane? Come on now. This is from DeFamer on Gorka and they have a quote from an article from 1993. Howard Stern homeed in on the May August aspect of the relationship on the radio host interviewed his old friend last spring. So Stone said, feigning moral indignation, you sit in Central Park and have a candy bar on a string and pull it when the girls come? Oh my god. Yeah, you could have just had moral.

They could have been sincere. We're saying May August there. That's slightly watered down May December romance. Uh, amazingly Seinfeld, master of his comedy domain, was flustered. Quote, she's not 17, definitely not, he insisted. Depending on what period Seinfeld is talking about, he might have been telling the truth. She turned 18 on May 29th, 1993 shortly after the two met. She might have technically been 18. Wow. Very cool.

Very cool. You know what she could have used? A doctor. You know what Shoshana Lonsdine could have used some advice from an older woman, from a girl boss, CEO, master of her corporate domain, and we of course know her as, Dr. Lucy. If you find that you are having a little relationship trouble, just to pick up your telephone and dial it on the double. You call one, eight hundred, three, one, seven, five, five, five, Now you're pagingaging Dr. Lucy. Paging Dr. Lucy. That's where you come for advice from Dr. Lucy when she's not being CEO, Lucy. That's right.

I wear many hats. I am a girl boss, and I'm doing a lot of winning in every corner of my life. The traditional hat that a doctor wears, the traditional hat that a CEO wears. I've got seven horrible children. It's all going on. All going on. Women can have it all. I'm imagining you wearing, you're wearing the Dr. Mario, like, uh, the band with a big disc on it. What is that thing for? It's for it for it for it for it for it for it for it for it, it, it, it, it, it, th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, I, I, I, I, I, I, I thi, I's, I's, I's, I thi, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm thi, I's, I'm th. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th. I'm th. I's, I's, I's, I's, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, I's, I'm the that, I'm that, the that, the that, that, the that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the that, the that, the the band with a big disc on it. What is that thing for? It's for pulling down and like looking in somebody's eye with the light. I think it's looking into pussies. That is what, Dr. Mario, he's a gynecologist. Wow!

Wow! He says that when he falls into a pussy. Yeah. He says that when he falls into a pussy. Pulling in there. Wow. Tchoo! Do da today. Duhh. Trying to get out of there? Oh no.

But the worst part is the bill that he gives you at the end, am I right? Oh, so true. So what's going on, Lucy? Oh, this is hardly advice. This is just an article that made me really mad, and it's from the Guardian. Would you believe it? We don't have the author's name in there, but I don't think it's important because we're not going to be particularly nice to them. We know what's getting back to them. Needlessly mean, yeah.

This is from the Guardian. Sex is back, but it's going to be different and hot. It's like a bit boring sex you've been having. Immediately sex is back, I'm not sure, like, was sex out? Sex is back and in a big way. So I guess sex has been out, but um, hey, we, let's just go and do it. I've been done with sex for a long time now. It's cool being married, am I right? That's right. I'm Catholic.

That's right. Welcome to the summer of love, the hoaring 20s, shot girl summer, the smell of meat and lotion. A bus passed by yesterday, it's side-painted with an advert encouraging passes by to Vax, Wax and Relax. The new sexual revolution is here, and all it took was a deadly pandemic and a year indoors. It's true, it's coming, look there. Big women, swaggering through a Pollarded boulevard, feeling themselves like they've never feeled before. Feele?

Not a word. Feeling themselves like they've never feailed before. I think they're trying to be clever with words. I think they are. This whole article reminds me of, what's her name? The House is Haunt, Elizabeth Farrelly, vibes. Suited men singing soul songs under their breath. Teenagers standing so close they're talking in each other's voices. You know how teenagers weren't

having sex until now? Teenagers, they hate sex. Hate it. Well these ones do. They hate drugs, they hate booze and they hate having sex. But you know what they love? I think it's called tick-tac. Yeah they love tick-tac. I'm hearing it more and more more more more more more more their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their their their their their. their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the thea. the thea. thea. the the the the the the the called Tick-Tack. Yeah, they love Tick-Tack. I'm hearing it more and more. There's a picnic by the swings where someone has served themselves with mayonnaise on a soft baget in the supermarket. Ooh, I think that that... Something about mayonnaise on a soft baget. It's cum.

I think she's talking about cum. She's thomen, women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, women, th, th, th, tha, think she's talking about cum. She's talking about cum. Yep. Women stand mesmerized by the erotic hum of a freezer. You know I'm always standing in the freezer section of foolies and just getting just getting jazzed up. I love it when the the hum of the compressor on the fridge is the resonance frequency of the tip of my penis. Yep. To sort of stand in tip of my penis. Yep. Just sort of standing there and be like, ooh, how's that? The compressor clicks and I immediately am nutting all over the Ben and Jerry's. So it goes on like this.

A parking attendant kisses his own lips. The tune of an ice cream van sounds drunk and yearning. When did everyone get a body? When did everyone descend from the live work space of their minds and knock through to the basement of those hips, that hair? So that this whole thing smacks of someone who like, you know, the kind of people that will share those Facebook posts that are about words in other languages that don't have an equivalent in English or whatever, that sort of stuff, where they're like, have you heard of the word Sonder before?

These sorts of people who are like writing as my truth and my, they're trying too hard. Just describe the thing you're talking about. Don't use figurative language, it's just ridiculous. Yes, sex is back. For a while there it was touch and go whether it would survive the night, having evolved, devolved over the years, into a new kind of touceless touch. Many young people choosing to pursue relationships online rather than on sofas. Oh, honey. Hmm. But now...

Teams were still fingering this whole time. I'm absolutely sure that they were. If anybody was going to have been sucking, fucking and fingering this whole time, it was mean. It's the horniest people who also haven't developed the part of their brain that says, hey, there's consequences for this thing. You gotta get COVID from the person you're fingering or whatever. Mm, yep.

Ah, but now having had time to consider our futures, time to swipe our phones with thrice-washed hands and a new professional grade level of attentiveness, having come to new real realizations about toulonliness, the pandemic imposed limits of our new lives, and the self-imposed limits of our old ones, the world is ready for its return. For some, this will simply mean more. It will mean stepping out of the house, a prick in each arm, and another in the thigh for luck. One in each hand, am I right? Is she talking about a penis?

I think she's talking about asking for a third jab for good luck. Oh, like a needle. Like, Astra Zeneca. Astra Zeneca, Pfizer, Madurna. You've got them all. Slipping straight into a stranger's dress, a colleague's bathroom. Don't do that. Don't do that.

The idling Volvo of a dad waiting for the end of year 6 street dance. I'd love that she's just, she heard that like authors need to create worlds and she's like, all right, and just like, rolling the dice of things that she knows. I'll show you some worlds. Good luck to you, comrades. Congratulations, but for many, the end of our lockdowns will result in a different kind of sex. New kinks have bred in isolation. A genre of COVID porn is thriving on certain laptops.

What the fuck you talking about? I don't think that's true. Coved porn is a novelty. No one is into it. No. I think porn's been normal. I don't really think the ratings have really, have really shifted around. You got your, uh, you got amateur. You got regular. Is this in order of popularity?

I think so. Yeah. You've got other. Just, yeah. And then finally, normal. As soon as we are done here, I'm going straight on to porn hub and searching regular. Regular. Regular.

Normal porn. No COVID stuff for me, thanks. Unflavored for me. Oh God. The danger of touch, the forbidden thrill of brushing past an ungloved wrist. What the fuck you, are you a Victorian? Yeah. Are you going outside just before the sunsets in bloodborne?

What is going on? Oh, masks no longer only for the unvanilla. Sex has changed shape. So she's saying that... Not the way I do it. Like horny from wearing COVID masks, perhaps? I don't actually think that she has at this point said anything. Anything.

Yeah, I'm not quite sure what's going on. Someone needs to teach this lady about masturbation. About what? Well, I'll tell you afterwards. What's that? There's some very good instruction videos online. I bet there is. Their voices are so nice. Oh, those months on apps when people were forced to engage in different kinds of communication

beyond just meeting in a bar and thinking this will do, are, according to a report, Cosmopolitan commissioned from the Kinsey Institute, leading to more considered interactions. I don't believe that for a second. They predict the death of the one night stand, and a grand move away from destructive dating habits towards more experimentation, more thoughtful commitments, more pleasure and fewer people settling for less, a whole resetting of sexual expectation. You know what we've had 500,000 years of doing sex the way we've been doing it so far. I think COVID might have changed that. But we're not gonna, I don't even know what this woman is saying at this point.

Are we using Tinder? Are we not using it? Um, for many of us it won't be easy, not because we're not sexy and attractive. No, not that at all. We are all insanely attractive right now, actually. Thank you. Incredibly soft and awkward in our beauty. Everyone is gorgeous and no one is okay. This is painful. Yet again, I feel like there is nothing that's actually been said so far, and we are roughly halfway through the article.

It will be difficult in the way that all attempts at re-socializing and difficult, as we step gingerly into the wild, looking backwards with a scared and red-eyed wonder, before trotting cautiously towards the trees towards the towards the towards the towards towards the towards the towards the towards the towards the the towards the the towards the the the towards the the the towards the the way that all attempts at re-socializing and difficult, as we step gingerly into the wild, looking backwards with a scared and red-eyed wonder, before trutting cautiously towards the trees. How does a kiss? What is to sex? Who is hand? A whispered hiss of questions will echo around the clubs at 2 a.m. Two people will insist on timeouts during dinner just to quickly revise the rules about what is next, what is meant to happen next. I feel like I'm having a stroke reading this.

Yeah, real Liz Farley vibes here where you're just you're trying to be too creative with your language the point that it's nonsense. The point that I cannot comprehend a single sentence. The trick will be to weaponize this awkwardness and transform it into a series of exquisite tensions. Oh, okay. Yeah, I don't know that sense. Wrong the whole time. You need to weaponize the awkwardness. I'm writing this down on a Q card. It is a chance to be naive again. To purr as a person presses your back like a cat on Instagram or a David Attenborough cub. I think there are several people in our discord that would do that for you if you just message them. You just ask them on that. It's fine you can do it right now. There's no point like it doesn't have to be post-cove it. Why wait? Why wait? People are excited simply to sit across from a person

they admire, simply to pull a window closed or wetly kiss their cheek. Each drop of this excitement must be noted, harnessed and claimed as adorable. There will be people who want to lie fully clothed on top of the covers and breathe at each other. That's cool. I think those people should stay away from me. She's still talking about herself. Yep, she's just horny. You can just tweet, I'm horny. And like you will just, people will message you to have sex with you.

You could just do that if you wanted to. There will be people who want to use all the knowledge accrued from twice daily Zoom meetings to direct erotic films with high production values and a plot line about office politics. You know what I'm going to say? Those skills aren't transferable at all. No. You don't get to control any of the camera angles. The lighting, you're probably, what, you put in a lamp closer to your face maybe or something, you've not figured out how to record sound or how to do any of the stuff that you need to produce high production value erotic films at all. I'm not trying to upset the listener by telling them this, but I don't want you to get your hopes up. You can't go straight into Hertzog territory just because you've been on

some work meetings, yeah. There will be people who unload all the therapy they've had across the year onto their partner's bed and roll around on it. Excuse me? I love to unload my therapy onto my partner. That seems good. And it's like not in their wash cycle so they have to kind of like work out. I really wasn't gonna watch this for another week, but I guess I. I the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm their their their their their th. I'll their their their their their th. I' their th. I' their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I'll th. I'll the the the the the. I'll the. I'll the. I'll thea' thea' thea' thea'ea'ea'eatera' thea'ea'era'era'era'era'era'er. I's their wash cycle, so they have to kind of like... I really wasn't gonna watch this for another week, but I guess I... I don't know, bed's gonna smell like therapy for days.

I'll know it's there. Sleep, sleeping on the therapy spot. Yeah, because we can both sleep on the couch today, that's fine. It's all cold now. Oh. There will be someone for everybody once they've worked out how to say hello, I like you. It's going to be a good summer. It's going to be an interesting summer with moments of pain and the sometimes bastard thoughts that make us human. It's going to be hot, but in a ways that occasionally burn, a humid, bewildering kind of heat.

It's going to be the summer of complicated, radical, aging, queer, distanced, unlikely love. Welcome, enjoy, and please wash your hands. Someone is gunning for the Pulitzer with that one. She would like to get her nut off, but she's feeling a bit awkward about it. And so she's taken this experience and she's decided, you know what, I think I'm communicating, I think what I'm experiencing is a popular sentiment and I'm in a unique position to reveal this hidden truth through the power of writing. So I will contact the guardian and I'll say, hey, I have something the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi truth through the power of writing. So I will contact the Guardian and I'll say, hey, I have something very important to share and I think it will gel with a lot of your listeners and it's about how, you know, some of

us are horny but feeling awkward. Here's 800 words of absolute nonsense, can I have a million dollars? And they've said, yes? Absolutely. Absolutely. The Guardian loves can. Crabsolutely. The Guardian loves just pages and pages of just bizarre, incomprehensible prose. Oh, God, that'd be such a good fucking racket to get on. Oh, it would be. Look, it's, it's the oldest adage in publishing. Gotta print something.

Yep. Hey, I need a word count here. Can I get some words? Yep. You can get a lot of them. You're gonna readly. Impossible industry to crack into it. It's very strange.

Hi everybody, it's me. It's theo. Now I guarantee you I'm more afraid of recording this promo than you are of listening to it, so hear me out. If you haven't already, maybe check out our Patreon. It's a great way to support the show and it gives us the ability to actually dedicate time to this thing. You'll get all of our bonus episodes, it's over 300 extra episodes in total, and we'll set up a feed over there with none of this ever again. You'll also get access to our discord, which honestly has turned into a nice and funny place full of mostly normal people to hang out with. So that's Patreon.com slash Bunter Vista. Check it out.

Oh dear. I wonder if it's hard to get into another industry that we love to talk about here on the show. And of course, it is the industry of putting something into a box, taking the box down to the docks, taking the box, down to the docks, putting it into a bigger box. What's in the box? Could be socks. Could be anything. The important thing is that goes on to a big old ship. I'm itching for another edition of the shipping report. Could have gone with something maybe about avoiding rocks. That's one of the important parts of shipping.

Well, I don't want to spoil anything that's going to come up in the report. We'll find out. So this is of course the segment where we go through the shipping news from the week week week week week week week the week the week th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th going to come up in the report. We'll find out. So this is of course the segment where we go through the shipping news from the week that involved zero deaths. A lot of them involved deaths this week, but we won't be hearing about any of those. No jokes, here we go. The French bulk carrier Lush Chasney ran a ground in an Argentina's Parano River. Okay't do that? Stay in the water. As always, that's our advice. The asphalt tanker Amber Bay ran a ground while leaving Baranquia Colombia. Left in the wrong direction. Yep. You got to stay in the water. Come on now. A cargo of quote pellets, no more information provided on that one, on board the general cargo ship Kirsten B.

Caught fire as the ship was Edra Keel Canal, producing a quote rather unpleasant odor. That is of course short for Kirsten Bunst. I hope it is. The Taiwanese fishing vessel, D. Yee, number six, was reported on fire and adrift in the Indian Ocean. There's water everywhere. Yeah, use some of the water. The general cargo ship, Koeningsburg, ran a ground off Sandbron, Sweden. Again, stick to the water.

Keep, keep away from the dry, stay in the wet. Yep, it's that easy. The roll-on-roll-off cargo ship Lion A suffered engine failure and contacted a pier while unmooring at Iskendron Port Turkey. Oh. Yep. I guess you would want to contact a pier, but like, not by running into it just work. Telephone. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And finally, the general cargo ship, Mega D suffered mechanical in the sea of Marmara was taken under to Ah to Ahikarpi Anchorage, Istanbul. Come on now. Hmm. So to the author of the previous story who is clearly after a Mega D you can find it at Arakapi Anchorage in Istanbul. Yep. Just head on down to the docks. Boy are you, I can't be anchorage in Istanbul because you got that mecatee. I really landed that one. Just before anyone writes in obviously there

wouldn't be any docks at the anchorage because it's an anchorage not a um... I don't know what that is. Yep. Wow, that's fine. That was the shipping report. I feel like everybody did a pretty good job of doing no jokes except for Ben? I didn't make any jokes. I peppered it with facts. You think those were facts? Sometimes facts are funny. I took my little fact mill and I came over to your table and I said, A fresh a fact.

Yep, that's exactly what happened. Just like the famous Saturday Night Live sketch where Adam Sandler plays a waiter in a restaurant delivering fresh pepper to people but it keeps getting it wrong. Very funny stuff. Uh, don't Okay. Don't bother going back and watching 90s Saturday Night Live or any of the current stuff, you know. If you've got, yeah, if you've got through everything else you could ever want to watch, have a look-see, you know. Anyway, that was our report about swanning about on the seven seas. And there's another place that swans exist.

That's right, we're talking about nature. To the claims. I belong. Ultanista. Nature Corner. Rubber crab. Snipped my dick. Now Ben, you looked pretty unhappy about that segue when it happened. No, I was loving it. Sorry, I was very perturbed by the fact that Theo briefly pointing his camera down to awards his gaming mice, mouse, so it's just a one, before pointing it

straight back up again. Yep, that's that gaming brand with the three legs. Oh. Is that uh? That's because Logitech keep making mice where the middle mouse button will like the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thu. I th thu. I was thu. I was very thu. I was very thu. I was very the the the the the thu. I was very theatu- the the tho- tho- thoe thoe the thiobupea thupea thupea thupea thu per thu per thu peed thu pea thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu. I was very very very very very very very very thu. I was very thu. I was very thu. I was very thu. I was very the the thi the thir the theateateateate theateateateatu. theatu. I was very theateateateate the thioe the thi th. Oh. Is that uh... It's because Logitech keep making nice where the middle mouse button will like eject your CD-Rom drive or something like that and you can't change the settings. A CD-Rom drive, huh? What a world do you live in?

And four speed, four by. With two-by read right, I think. God. It's not that kind of podcast, come on. This is from the Swindon Advertiser. A Swindon woman went viral on the social media site, Tick-Tac, after videoing a swan in her dad's bedroom. Mm-hmm. I don't think it's meant to be in there, you know?

No, my bedroom traditionally free of swans. Plenty of other birds in there though. Ooh! Ooh! Oh, oh! Oh! Is that accurate Ben? No, it's just me and a dog. Okay. Ben's gonna have to go for a little run around the house after this podcast. Just to give his beans out.

Immediately go down the supermarket and press his dick up against the freezer. You know? Don't worry, I'm doing this to be normal. Hmm. The alternative is I write for the guardian. Looking around at all of the other startled customers saying, this is normal for all th. th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to thi. to to thi. to to thi. Ben thi. Ben to to to to to to that, Ben to that, Ben that, Ben to that, Ben to to to to to to to to thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben th. Ben th. Ben th. Ben th. Ben th. Ben th. Ben th. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben thi. Ben, thi. Ben, thin. thin. thin. thin. thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Ben, toeauuu. Ben, to thi. Ben, the guardian. Looking around at all of the other startled customers saying, this is normal for all of us now. The erotic hum? This is the new normal.

Honey about that freezer or what? This is how we all feel. You know? The bird got in the house through the front door. Okay, I cannot... Sure. Door was open. I can't, yeah.

Make yourself at home, you know? The bird got in the house through the front door, which was left open while her father was gardening at the back of the house. What is this guy's fucking deal? Now, just an interesting construction there is that obviously the her is meant to be referring to to to the woman to to to to the woman, to the woman, to to the woman, to to to the woman, to, to, the woman, to, to, the woman, to, the woman, to, the woman, the the the to, the the the the the the the to, to, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thoom, thoombsoombsoombse, thoombsoombsea, thoombsoombse, thoombsea, thoombs, thoombs, thoombs, thoombs, thoomthat obviously the her is meant to be referring to the woman mentioned in the previous paragraph but it doesn't make it seem like the swan is female and it was the swan's dad that was gardening and that is a nice thought. Picture that. Are you done picturing it? Right into us if you finished picturing a swan gardening male bag at Budavista dot we see those emails now. We do. We do. And it was good because when we did find our hidden trove of emails, we did get to find

out how many people had stopped the podcast to take a look at a picture of the Fresno Nightcrawler. That's way more than we thought. Yep. So if you didn't do that, then, you can do that now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now now let us know. Ideally I would like any kind of description of what you are visualizing so perhaps if you've got like if you're picturing the swan's dad so yeah I guess like maybe the swan. There's also a swan yeah obviously but maybe it's wearing like some swan type overalls.

Where do they come up to, you know? It's got to still have the wings free, obviously. If he's using a little spade or a little kind of digging fork, is he holding it in his, like the tips of his wings or is he using his mouth to hold it and kind of turn the earth? Both are good. Or, or his feet, the one with actual. That's ridiculous. Don't even. That's insane. I'm th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm the th. I th. I th. I th. I'm the the th. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the type. I's type. I's type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I'm type. I's type. I's type. I's type. I's type. I's, the one with actual. That's ridiculous. Don't even. That's insane. I'm picturing him wearing, you know the Bunnings hat

that every father has? I believe Theo, you've got one. That's right, I am a father. Yeah, the straw wide brim Bunnings hat that they think they sell for like five bucks. Adelos, yes. So So that your walking advertisement for it. You are in your backyard while you were doing, you're gardening a billboard for Bunnings.

Ideally, yes. So, Tracy Gray Jones was visiting her father in Eastmere when she saw the swan in his bedroom where her mum died earlier this year. All right, irrelevant. Yeah, I might be saying something, or is it? Because I might be saying something like, hey, Swan, get out of the place of my mother's death. Or you might be saying,

That swans me ma'a. So the caption on the video is, quote, My mum passed in February. I think she returned today as this swan to check on dad. Well, he's out the back. He's not even there. Not even there. Well, no, I think using powerful angel magic,

she lured the swan into the bedroom where she died, which is of course where her ghost, angel ghost lives, and then she was able to then go into the body. Oh, pass across the veil. And as we all know, the barrier between worlds is the thinnest at a swan's brain. That's right.

It's true. Maybe she just wanted to haunt a swan. Like how good would that be? Like being a ghost and just like fucking with a swan. You remember, yeah, you remember... You remember the... If you want it? In the movie Ghost, when the only thing that Patrick Swayze could do was possess whoopi Goldberg for a brief period of time.

What if a swan was the only thing you can get into, you know? How are you, how are you giving a message? It's folding your wings around it. That noise, the swan makes. That's the classic swan sound. Yeah, you hear that classic unchained melody. Oh my love. Huck, huck. Hark. Hark. My darling. How are you going to get that clay out of your feathers, you know? Hmm. Tracy said, I was shocked, but I felt very calm and I asked the swan, what are you doing here?

She doesn't say what the swan's answer was to the question. I think the swan just smiled knowingly. Notting sagely. Oh boy. Shaking its head ruefully. You have no idea what the swan's been through to be here today, you know. My dad didn't really know what was going on when I went out to him and asked him to come and take a look. His first reaction to seeing the swan was, bloody hell! said Ms. Gray Jones 57. I was

picturing a young woman when I first read this story. So was I and it makes the dying mother seem a little less tragic to me. Yeah, she was just old as fuck. I'm not going to evaluate the tragedy of someone's mother's death when they're a stranger. In the movie Ghost, when Patrick Swayze's character Sam gets killed, he's very young, he's in a prime of his life. He's got us. Some of us have not seen the movie Ghost. He's got a hot Betty of a girlfriend, played by a young taught Demi Moore. And he has it all snatched away from him by that guy, that actor with a weird face.

Yeah. Forrest Whitaker. No. He does have a weird face, doesn't he? It's more the boss eye that's the distracting feature of his face I think But you know so he had to he had to Had unfinished business. I feel like if your single spinster daughter is 57 your business is probably all wrapped up. Oh wait sorry I was thinking of ghost dog. That is

Come on. That's a bad mistake. That's a great movie. Shut the fuck up. Two thumbs down for Jim Jarmush. That's the official podcast position. I am grabbing each of your hands and I'm forcefully turning them back the other way around the wrong way that they don't rotate.

Two beautiful thumbs to Jim Jarmish, a man who... A man who... A man who... He simply does not care if anyone is bored by his movies, which is why he's made 20 extremely boring movies that I love very much. Damn, you're really selling me on this motherfuckers' boring movies. They're so good. The best part of Ghost Dog is when nothing happens for 40 minutes, and then Forest Whitaker acts like his gun is a samurai sword and goes, whoosh, and puts it back in his holster.

That made me want to kick a fucking hole in my TV. Check out the movie Ghost Dog, wave the samurai. You could be watching the director's cut of the Ben Affleck Daredevil movie, like me, a person who uses his time well. Jesus, it's really nice. Anyway, it does put back in the completely removed plot involving Coole-yo. I don't recollect that, but then I've not seen Daredevil since I saw it at the cinemas when I was like 13 years. Well, that's because he wasn't in it in the theatrical cut.

They took him out. They took him out. They erased him. They did erasure. Miss Gray Jones concludes by saying, he just then went into the bedroom and asked it to leave and it got up and walked out the front door. Just like your mother. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, like, like, like, like, like, I, like, like, like, like, like, like, I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. theea. took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, took, t asked it to leave and it got up and walked out the front door just like your mother I don't know if it like it's her dead mom and he's just been like get the fuck out of here the fuck out of the fuck out of yeah it seems like they both had a real opposite ends of the spiritual

experience spectrum there of like her being like incredible it's my mom I didn't miss me like oh bloody hell piss off they're maybe he knew it was. Maybe he knew it was the mother and he was like, piss off then. Go on, but. And that mother's name was Donald Rumsfeld. Rest in peace to Donald Rumsfeld. Yep. Rest in peace, sir. Friend of the show. Architect of the Iraq War.

Donald Rumsfeld. Plural. Oh boy. Yeah, Jesus. Huh? About Iraq Wars. Yeah. Yeah.

That's true. It's very true. Also. Shout out and happy 30th birthday. The friend of the show, Nick. No further explanation on that one required. All right. Have a birthday, Nick.

Now, next up on the docket, I see what do my eyes peep before me? It's a new segment. Ben, would you like me to play the new segment theme? I would love for you to hittheme song to the segment called Theo C's. Now this is a tremendously good pun. If... I'm going to need you to explain it to me painstakingly.

Now let me get you to cast your mind back to the early 2000s where a man called John Dwyer starts a band called... Is Okinawa a crash suit maybe? I don't know. Anyway, the point is there's a band now that I think is just called OCs, used to be called the OCs, then was called the OCs. It's plan words there. I wouldn't, I would have used the O.C. the O.C.S. I would use the O.C. the O. I w. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The th. The. The. The. The. The. The th. The th. The th is th is th is the the the the the the the th is th is th is th. The th is is is th. The th. The th. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. T. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. song is the dream by the OCs. So it's for Theo C's and this is a segment that is of course about Theo's dreams. Theo, can you recount to me the most recent dream that you've had place? I can. You did message me in the morning to say, hey, Theo, can you recount a dream for me as

I was meaning to write down for the first time a dream that I'd had, which was a very weird experience. But I have these dreams every single night. I went to the doctor, this is not the dream, to get a mental health plan the other day. And she's like, oh, so the effects who you're taking, hey, getting any vivid dreams? And I said, yes. And here's one now. Dated the 29th of the 6th, 21st. I think I was staying at a beach house with my in-laws or family. I was playing a game which ended up being the hardest piece of shit ever devised. First section made you draw an arrow to line up with another arrow so there's no big deal. Then there was like a third person shooter section that took.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the thi the the their their their their their tho- tho- their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their the the. the. the. the. theateateateateateateateateateateateateateateate. theateateate. theateateate. theat with another arrow, so there's no big deal.

Then there was like a third person shooter section that took place in kind of a grove for a flooded volcano, eventually facing down a large sinuous boss that I defeat with a claw-like weapon whose secondary fire takes a while to go off, but eventually let's loose a celestial missile that does massive damage in a heavenly glow. Even so it's clear that I'm only scraping through. I see other like players getting like a million secrets that I never got. There's like enemies that are too tough for me that I can't beat all this sort of stuff. And occasionally I'll like

dip out of the game back into the beach house where I'm inevitably like using the wrong toilet and getting in trouble for being in the wrong room in th in th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And I's th. And I'm like, okay, like, like, like, like, like, I's, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I's, I's, I's, I'm, I'm, I'm, they. And, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, I'm, like, I'm, like, I'm, the beach house where I'm inevitably like using the wrong toilet and getting in trouble for being in the wrong room in this and like hey well that's my that's my toilet while you're there something. I just need to shit you know so there's a few more stages that I don't quite recall one I do recall is having to use self-assurredness to stop a mechanic from working on somebody else's car even though mine th. th. th. th. th. th. th I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th th at th at th at th at th at th at th. I th. I th. I th. I'll th. I'll the thi. I'll the the the the. I'll that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the theeeeeeeeeat's thee. theee. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that car, even though mine's already up on the platform. This I fail out and this was like the end of this chapter of the game, which currently rates my performance an F. The game is by Bethesda.

The next section is more sort of Zelda E at outdoors. There's some sort of gem-rolling puzzle that I see someone else complete, but it's completely baffling to me. And at this point, I'm completely resigned to like, fuck at this game, I'm not going to be able to beat it. I try and balance a chunk of earth on a very small volcano. It's sort of like maybe two meters across. But the chunk of earth is sort of just bouncing all. I think think there was like jump pads on the bottom of it as well, if I kind of picture it. I enter a room and I'm very small and I'm inspecting objects on desks and

shelves. There's one shelf that's sort of covered in crystals and they sort of have a smell. I remember marking to myself, like me and the dream while I'm playing the game. Oh, this one's, that's weird. I can smell of vision kind of technology. I. I. I, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thiiiii, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and I'm thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, and I'm thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thi thi, thi, thi, the game. Oh, this one's, that's weird. I can smell things in the game, like they must have new like smell of vision kind of technology. I pick up a plastic container in this room where I'm tiny and I saw it open and dozens of pieces of plastic ring pour out and it's clear that I have to somehow put the ring back together in like the right order which I'm completely not on board with. Eventually I'm back out in like the open world and I try and retrace a part of where I was previously, which was like outside of a cave, but I get punished for being in the same place twice,

and like some god in the game pours a stream of water onto my head, which washes me away and kills me. I don't know, I think there's a gap in my dream. the dream, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, tham, throwne, throwne, throwne, thiomomom, thiom, the thi, the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and their, and their, their, and their, thr-a, and thr-a, thr-a, thr-s.eate.oom.oomorrow, thr-a. thr-s. throwne. thr-a. throomorrow, and their, their, the I don't know, I think there's a gap in my dream, like recollection here, but the dream eventually moves on to me zooming around a game of rugby, which is complete chaos, rules are not being like followed. Afterwards, I'm in a room that sort of feels like part dining room and part locker room, and for some reason we all have to be on our toes in case we get called on. I ask the guy next to me why we're all here and he says, this is my quarantine party. I'm going into quarantine tomorrow, don't you remember? And I lie and say yes. Eventually a shamewebkey kind of guy rushes in and

like heads up and asks me to close my eyes and then he grabs me by my orthodonic braces and sort of spins my head around inside of my head like the inside moves but the outside does not. All right and so what we're going to be doing here is we're going to be consulting the book 10,000 Dreams Interpreted by Gustavus Heinman Miller. I'm going to start with some of the broader strokes and see how we go. I am looking up beach. I don't have beach in here. Fuck.

Sorry, do you have a physical dream book that explains dreams? I'd certainly do, yes. Look at the cover on that bad boy. That's beautiful. All right, the next thing I had on the list is toilet, so let's check for that. There's a lot going on there, Theo. I dream like this every single night. Very good memory also, disturbingly, so.

I had never remembered my dreams until I started taking the miracle drug effects all. Oh great. Yeah, toilets not in there either. This is going so well. Losing? Not in there. Ten thousand dreams and none about a toilet. Looking for a volcano now. Surely.

Volcano. There's got to be something. Here we go. Got a volcano in? To see a volcano in your dreams, signifies that you'll be in violent disputes which threaten your reputation as a fair dealing and honest citizen. For a young woman it means that her selfishness agreed will lead her into intricate adventures. Oh, I mean that sounds great though. Yeah, so look forward to... I have the intricate adventures.

Intricate note just for you. Not just the violent altercations. And that's something just for ladies that you that you that you that you that you that that you that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th th th th thi thi thi thi thi- thi- thi- thiol- thiol- thiol- thi- that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that you'll that that that that that that thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' thi' th I have the intricate adventures? Intricate note just for no women. Not just the violent altercations for you. And that's something just for ladies. I'm looking up shrinking now. That's gotta mean something. We have sheaves but not fucking beach. Socialist. That is interesting. But I won't tell you what that is until you dream about it.

That is the deal that we've struck. Yes, when we all decided together to come up with specifically this segment. I'm shrinking. This is fucking bullshit. This book sucks. That's pretty textbook, right? It's some Freudian stuff. That's some masculinity stuff. I'm gonna put death in there from when you died. There's got to be a death one, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that is. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. That, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is, that is that is that is that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that stuff. I'm going to put death in there from when you died. There's got to be a death one, right? Oh. All right, here we go. This one is substantially, it's a very large entry. To dream of seeing any of your people dead, your people.

I don't know what that means. They talk about the white race? I'd say. Warns you of coming dissolution or sorrow. Disappointment always follows dreams of this nature. To hear of any friend or relative being dead, you will soon have bad news from some of them. Dreams relating to death or dying, unless they are due to spiritual causes, are misleading and very confusing to the novice in dream law when he attempts to interpret them. A man who thinks intensely fills his aura with thought or subjective images active with the passions that gave them birth. By thinking and acting on other lines, he may supplant these images with others possessed of a different form of nature. In his dreams he may see these images dying, dead or their burial and mistake them for friends or enemies. In this way he may, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi.. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thii. thii. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi., dead, or their burial and mistake them for friends or enemies. In this way, he may, while asleep, see himself or a relative or a relative, when a reality he has been warned that some good thought or deed is to be supplanted by an evil one.

To illustrate! If it is a dear friend or relative, whom he sees in the agony of death, he is warned against a moral or other improper thought and action. But if it is an enemy or some repulsive object dismantled in death, he may overcome his evil ways and thus give himself or friends cause for joy. Often the end or beginning of suspense or trials are foretold by dreams of this nature. They are frequent, they also frequently occur when the dream is controlled by imaginary states of evil or good. A man in that state is not himself but is what the dominating influences make him. He may be warned of approaching conditions or his extrication from the same.

In our dreams we are closer to our real self than in waking life. I'm so sorry, Theo. The hideous or pleasing incidents seen and heard about us in our dreams are all of our own making. They reflect the true state of our soul and body, and we cannot flee from them unless we drive them out of our being by the use of good thoughts and deeds by the power of the spirit within us. So I don't like this dream book at all. It's very patronizing.

It's very patronizing, very dark, negative, bad vibes. So is Theo meant to kill someone or not? I think it's saying that the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad the bad th. th. th. th. the th. the the th. thioioio. the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho. tho. thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho. tho. to to to to to tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. So. tho. th? I think it's saying that the bad dreams are his own fault. Oh. That's the conclusion I'd already assumed that. Yes, because of your corrupt soul. It comes off as kind of victim blaming to me, you know? And is there anything in there about shame web key kind of like grabbing me by my by my braces and... I don't know what keyword to look for spitting the inside but not the outside of your head? And I don't think th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin thin the I don't know what keyword to look for spitting the inside but not the outside of your head. And I don't think there's a shade web country in it. Well we are pretty well at time at this point but I would like to do one more segment if that's okay with you guys.

Andrew would you please play the theme for the Great American Hall of Name. It's the Great American Hall of Name. This is where we celebrate one of America's names. This is where we celebrate one of America's gifts to the worlds, which is somehow taking Anglophone names and making them very specifically American in a way that is just beautiful. I have taken these names this week from the NASCAR standings from the year 1950 through to the year 1960 and I've got to say there are some fucking great ones in here.

I'm gonna jump right in. Hub McBride. Come on now. Straight in there. August Sand. All right. Okay. It sounds like a James Taylor album. Yeah. It does. Leymann Utsman. Come on. Clyde Goons. Oh, that's a perfect name. Gover Sozby. Come on. Joe Jernigan. No, no.

All right. Burhead Nance. So which like teen fantasy novel were you getting these names from? The Shannara Chronicles. Hully Bun. Pepper Cunningham. Pepper Cunningham. Lamar Cramtree. Smoky Purser. Smoky Perse.

Herb leg. That is of course with two gs. Herb leg. Elm Cupert. Wyddy Gherkin. What? Oh, Oh.

Oh. Tyrarakestraw. Come on. Obey Chup. Obie Chup. Come on, man. Now, this next name that I'm about to say. I want you to know that I checked and that this is this man's birth name. This is not a nickname. This is not a the name. It a the the the the the the the the egg. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. No. Oh. Oh, the. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh, this. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Now, this next name that I'm about to say, I want you to know that I checked and that this is this man's birth name.

This is not a nickname. Got it. Wimpy Sipple. Wimpy sipple. Wimpy sipple. Wimpy sipple. Buddy Crabb. Buddy Krebs. Oh boy. Shelby Colby. Hmm.

Lovely. Mmm. Tidy that one. Earl beer. That's beautiful. Oh, it's so good. Dink Wydenhouse. I played that game.

Ted Rambo. Ted Rambo. Joe Prismo. Joe Prismo. Johnny Coy. That's nice. Johnny Dollar. Mmm, that's better. Johnny Grubb.

That's worse. Terrible man. Cecil Grubbs. Disgusting, Sessle Grubb. That's worse. Terrible man. Cecil Grubbs. Disgusting Cecil Grubbs. Richard Cummings. Known to his friends. Etc. Etc. His friends is the cumpster. Richard Spittle. And known to his friends. Et cetera, et friends. Get those two in the... Etc.

Get those two in a room. It's just disgusting. Dick Cable. Damn. Dick Clank. Dick Clank. Dick. Dick Passwater. Dick Passwater? Dick Passwater?

Mm-hmm. Are you telling me this dude's name is Dick Pissing? It is. It is a fucking, is this like a, is this an art project that you've got going like, like I'm not there? Where you claim that this is non-fiction? Yeah, it's exactly like

Horse e-books where they claimed it was random, but it was all curated. It's all fact. Dick Soper. Oh boy. And finally, bring his home, Dick Dixon. My goodness. What a wonderful country. Too many of those names reminded me of like the bit from like one of Steve Martin's stand-up sets in the 70s where he talks about how Steve Martin is his stand-up name and his real name is Gern Blanston. Too many of those names are pretty much Gern Blansten.

Is Gern Blansten the name that I just missed? No, that's Steve Martin stage name. No, his real name. You just missed Dick Soper, who drove one race. He won zero races. There are zero podium finishes, zero pole positions. Uh, not a great career. Were you double checking that I had not made that man up? I had to, I'm sorry, Bamber, this is, this is, this is a, this is a testament I think to, uh,

not a lot of trust is going on here. Trust, but verify. I, uh, I looked at, obviously, a to a ton of these. One of the ones that really stood out to me was that I think in 1959 there was a man in there called Charlie Chaplin and he was in one race that he didn't place in. And I was like, did they maybe was this some sort of like weird celebrity thing where they got him to do a lap or whatever. No it's just a man whose name is Charlie Chaplin. No relation. Charles Chaplin, no relation.

My goodness. Well, sounds like that is all we have time for this week. Folks, just remember if you had forgotten, and maybe you're learning this for the first time, we've got a bunch of, got a bunch of merchandise. Over on, yeah. We got so much merch. Probably too much. It's all very nice though. Yep, somebody needs to have it shipped to them, it could be you.

Head on over to shop. to Buntavista.com. If you would like to place an order for maybe a t-shirt with a sexy big foot on it. Yep. Maybe a cool wizard, you know? Bloody, uh, we're doing the bottle shop at the bar at the moment because of lockdown and a dear friend of the show, Taylor came in with the, uh, one of the old, VB- design tote bags. I said, look at that. Never seen one of those before. What a lovely treatreatreatreatreatreatreatreatreate that that that that treate that that th the that the the that the V-B design tote bags.

Wonderful. I said, look at that. Never seen one of those before. What a lovely treat that was. Well, we still sell that design on a shirt. We have not received a cease and desist at this point. Woo! Please don't come for us, A, B, Inbevv. or fucking whoever it is. We're small. We don't got no money. We're small. thahahahahahahah. We don't th. We don't th. We don't th. We're small. We don't th. We don't th. We don't th. We don't th. We don't th. We don't th. We're small. We don't th. We're small. We th. We. We're small. We're small. We're small. We're that. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. over. Shop.b.bunta Vista.com.

Do not forget to have paused the podcast half an hour ago. And written the thing to us that you were picturing. Oh yeah, you were picturing what the swans dad looked like when he was gardening out the back of the house. Yep. Right on in. Pen that into a mail bag at Buntvista.com. to. to visit. to visit. to visit. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the shop.com.com.com.com.com.com. to to to to to to to to to to to shop.com. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. Shop. to. to. to. to. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We. We the. We're. We the. We're. We're. We're. the. Shop. the. Shop. Shop. to. Shop. Shop. to. Shop. to. Shop. to. Shop. Shop. to. Shop. to. Shop. Shop. the. the. Shop. the. the. the. the. We're. We're. the of the back of the house. Yep. Yep. Right on in. Pen that into us, mail bag at Buntavista.com. We do need to, we're going to do a roundup either on the bonus episode this week or on the next episode of all of the people who wrote into us to say, I have eaten food on a train in the Netherlands and here's what happened to me. Holy fuck. We have never received, thrific. to to to to to to to to to to to thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thiol-I th. th. thi. thi. thiol-I. th. th. th. th. th. We is, th. We is, th. We, th. We, th. We, the the the the the the the the the th. We, th. We, th. We th. We th. We th. We're, thin. thin. thin. We're, thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. We're, th. We're th. We're th. We're th. We to me. We have never received, I don't think, like, this isn't even one where specifically we were demanding for people to do this.

Or maybe we were, I don't know, we got a lot of responses to this, just like a shockingly... Thank you so much to everyone that wrote it. So we're excited to get into those. And hey, you should be excited also? Yeah. Please? Please be excited. Please be excited as that woman from the Guardian is about getting a nut off.

You know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because she is fucking psyched about it. Jazz up. Yep. That's it, everybody. Jazzed up. Yep. That's it, everybody.

We love you. We're kissing all of you repeatedly on all of the parts of your body that you have given us consent to kiss. And, uh, see you later. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. you