Boonta Vista - EPISODE 216: Nothing Like A Bird's Asshole

Episode Date: September 9, 2021

It's Andrew's birthday today so he's off doing whatever an Andrew does. In his absence, Lucy, Theo, and Ben bring you: a very Italian crime, a very barefoot Italian, a series of ironic covid deaths, and a perfectly preserved butthole. ** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

All right, so I went all good to help. Alright, so when I have you ready, Theo. Thank you, Ben. Having a little sip of, what is that, apple juice? Yeah, this is the apple juice you get in hospital because, uh, welcome to Buonto Vista. My name is Theo, and... Oh, sorry, I'm a bit disoriented because I've just woken up from surgery in this hospital bed. That's right. I've just woken up from surgery with a brand new dump truck ass.

What did they do with the old one? Uh-huh. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you so much, but it was soiled and no one would take it. I'm really looking forward to lock down like finishing so I can go to the clubs, make it clap, work this absolute, and you get the idea. Yeah, you know what they say? If you make an ass clap in your own home, but there's no one around to hear it. Did that ass really clap?

Certainly not. And also waking up in the hospital bed beside mine is Lucy and she's looking down and seeing her brand new pair of huge naturals. Wow. I mean, how could you have new huge naturals? Oh, we'll get into that. Are they someone else's babs? Lucy, how are you enjoying them?

What do you, what do you reckon? I'm enjoying them? They're enormous. They're comical. I feel like a cartoon rabbit. But I do also feel like a naughty little thoddy and also a baddie. Oh, damn. And also your insurance no longer covers back pain and issues. That's right. Very sorry about that. And I assume they're great. I'm not going to be looking at them out of respect. Thank you. Enjoy them. I simply respect you to be looking at them out of respect. Thank you. Enjoy them. I simply respect you too much to look at your new huge natties.

And of course, who's this coming around in the third hospital bed? But Ben, Ben, you've got some, oh, just wonderful new feet there. Absolutely gorgeous. Slightly wet as if they'd been dabbed around in a toilet before now. But I think they'll start to get the Instagram cash flown, etc. Have you got Andrew's feet? When you can't have Andrew's feet. Because in the fourth bed is...

Doctor? There was four of us. You can't have Andrew's feet because in the fourth bed is... Doctor, there was four of us. Who was... the Andrew, the guy Andrew in the fourth bed, what happened, what happened to him? And the doctor says, who do you think gave you that thunderous ass, huge daddies, and toilet slapping feet. I will miss him, but I will say I found him very distracting to work with while he had those huge mijomboes. Yeah, I really changed the dynamic. You don't expect them when you first meet him. He kept insisting that we have a webcam component of the podcast, which I was quite resisted to.

And I didn't want to say it's because I couldn't stare at you huge jug jugs and also think of stuff to say. It was also weird that he wanted us to start recording on chatterbait. You're doing it in Google video. We kind of talked around on that one. He was never quite clear on what extra functionality that that would have given us. God bless him. It's his birthday, which is why he's not. Which is why he's dead. He decided that 39 was the perfect point to say, you know what? I'm out.that's the peak

why do you need any more years what are you got what are you got past 39 you got nothing classic classic prime number of course no no but fair enough oh yeah it's also episode 216 yeah I was gonna matters to any yeah I don't think anyone really cares. Plus that's the less...A.A. after Andrew. Maybe if you've got like your entire like series of episodes just all dumped in a folder and by some weird mistake they're all just like randomly named. And so you have to listen to each one to work out where you, which number they are, to work out whether it's the next one that you should listen to. Yeah, if that happened.

Sort of doing a bubble sort I think on your podcasts. And we can talk about different types of say sorting trees or methods, any other time that you like. But now it it it it it it it it's th th now it's th now it's th now it's th now it's th now it's th th thi it's thi it's thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho-a' tho-s. tho-a' thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. they're thea. thea. thea. thea. trees or methods, any other time that you like. But now it's time to talk about some weird shit that Lucy likes. And that is, of course, aeroplanes. Do you prefer saying airplanes or aeroplanes? I like aeroplanes. I like aeroplanes. That's fun.

Yeah, me too. I don't know why it would be weird. It's a weird weird weird weird weird weird weird weird weird weird weird. old-timey. I mean lots of lots of kids like airplanes. Yeah and you like them for a reason. They like them for a reason. They're interesting. I like planes because they're interesting. That's you mate. Wow, is that me? Is that what I sound like? I just think they're neat. It is of course time for plainly speaking. Uh, this is your captain speaking. Please return your seats of their upright positions as we are coming in hot on another edition of Plainly Speaking.

And that's, yep. That's it. Plain watch. Uh, I have a story here from the Associated Press. Italy police stop man suspected of snatching winning ticket. Not a lot of plane content in that headline. Yeah, but bear with me here. Border Police at Rome's main airport. There we go. On Sunday, prevented a Naples tobacco shop owner suspected of running off with the customers winning game ticket for boarding a flight to the Canary Islands, tell-it news reports there.

The man didn't have the filched card worth €500,000 on himself, but he did have a plane ticket for Fuerte Ventura, one of the Spain's Canary Islands, the Lepress News Agency said. It's so wonderful. I don't know what his plan was there. What was a plan? I feel like he was just making it up as he goes along, surely. Did somebody else have the ticket and was going separately? Or had he been like, hey, just wire me the cash when I get to the Canary Islands? Hard to imagine what he was thinking.

The man who hasn't been identified, but we guarantee his name is either Giuseppe or Mario, was wanted for investigation of suspected theft. That's warrior. He's naughty. He's evil. You're right, sorry. He might. He was. He was. He was. He was. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He might. He was. He th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He, he, he. He, he. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th th th thi. He thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. He's just just just thi. He thi. He thi. He theft. That's warrior. He's naughty. He's evil. You're right, sorry. He might be Wah Giuseppe. Wa'Josepi. Waa! Waa!

Waa! Why, Josep is strangely not racist. That's how you tell them the part. The man allegedly snatched the ticket and dashed off on his motor scooter after the customer on Friday to ask the shop in working-glass neighborhood of Naples to verify the wind, which is the top prize. That rules because she would have had to watch him go all the way away. Yeah, just be like, oh, but just going out the back to check your ticket here. He's like so long the the the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine. the machine. the machine. the machine. the machine. th. that's the machine. that's that's th. that's the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine the machine the the that. that's that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that's that's that's that's to be just. to be. to be. to that. that. that. that. that. that. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's that's t. that's t. t. t. t. t. tod today. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. today your ticket here. It's like, so long, suckers. We keep the machine out in the parking lot. Oh, okay, that's weird. You hear the sound of him try to start his mowbet a couple of times? I'll be right back.

I'll be right back. The older woman had purchased two scratch and win cards. She asked a shop employee to verify the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the, thoom. to, the tho, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th.o, tho, thr.o, tod.o, iso, iso, isp.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e. Wea, too. Wea, too. win cards. She asked a shop employee to verify the win, the employee then passed the card to one of the shop's owners for a final check. Italian news report said, but instead he allegedly kept the card and raced off on his motor scooter through Naples. That's the perfect crime. What a silly place. A very evocative way to describe it as well. Like, a cavotting. Like if you, the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thu, thu, thoom-a, thuoic, to their to to to to to to to to to tooom's, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the ta, ta, ta, taugh, ta, ta, ta-s ta-s ta-sopaugha ta ta ta-sa-sauaugha-s' tauauauaua scooter through Naples to me implies like a chase.

Like a cavorting. Like if you just said he then went home on his moped I'd be like, ah, okay so he just like drove off normally. But this is him like weaving through some like ancient alleyways and stuff. He's winding through the streets on his little Vespier. Ducking out the paint glass. He is now free on his own recognizance, LePres said. To thwart anyone from illegally cashing in authorities at the Italian tax office, which runs the scratch and win operation,

froze the entire block of card numbers that have been distributed to the backhoe shop. Investigators are still looking for the game card. Wait, did he work there? Like how did he get hand off the game card. Wait did he work there? Like how did he get hand of the game card? I think he, they would say that he owned the place? Then why don't they know who he is? No, they know who he is, they just haven't. Oh they just can't find him. They can't get him. They've arrested them to the press, I think. Oh okay, I see. But he's buried the cards the card the card the card the card the card the card the card the card the card the card the card the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. they've they've they're they just. they just they just they just they just they just they just they just they just they just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They just. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they. They they they they they they they they they they're just. I. I. I they just they just they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't they just haven't. They just haven't. Oh okay I see I see but he's buried the card somewhere he's secreted it away. I think it's sort of like a it's a mad mad mad mad world situation he's buried them under a oh my god you gotta watch it's a mad mad mad

mad world wonderful film but it's buried somewhere under a giant W for Wajuseppe. And that would be a great joke if you had seen the movie, it's a mad mad, bad, bad world. I can get it from context. Or if you'd seen it parodied in the Simpsons perhaps. I wouldn't have recognized it. Oh, all right, I gotcha. Now I'm with you. Well, that's the latest news from Italy. This is a segment we like to call the the the the the the the to to the to to to to the to the to the to the the the to to the the th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the. If theate. If tho. If tho. If tho. If tho. If tho. If tho. If tho. If the the the the the the. If the the th. If th. If th th. I th. I th. I th. th. the th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theateateateateateateateateateateateateateateate. theate. theate. the. now it's time for the latest news from Italy. This is a segment we like to call the Hole Report. I actually really love this hole. I think it's a unique hole, and I think it's difficult, and I can just go and roller.

This is a story from The Guardian. What is is this if not magic? The Italian man living as a hobbit. Just to clear it up before we get to the story, this is about a man living as a hobbit on purpose. Not a man whose life incidentally mimics the lifestyle of a hobbit. Like lives in a whole, eat seven meals a day and has insanely hairy feet. Yeah, it's 230. That describes hundreds of Italian people, but this is someone who's doing it for...

Mama Mia, what about the second pasta? I don't think he knows about second pasta. I think we're showing incredible restraint in here with the racist accents by the way. Someone... We got tagged in an argument on Twitter, like the podcast got tagged in the other day because uh, someone was like, hey, check this out. Here is, friendly Jordy's. Friendly Jordies.

Doing a sort of like racist Indian accent. And then they were like several, actually. He was going through like a number of. He's playing the heads. Yeah. And then someone's like, what about Bundavista? They do racist Italian and Dutch accents all the time. And I was like, that is thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their, their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi. the o' theat. theat theat. theateateateateateateateateateateatr.eatr. thooo. the and Dutch accents all the time. And I was like, that is true. And it's kind of easy to articulate why that's fine with Dutch accents. And when you get to Italian ones, it's always a little like...

Yeah, the Dutch are off the hook is the white. Yeah. Arguably the whitest people are life. And that's an argument that you could mount. The Italians? The Italians. Not, oh, I had... Hmm. Anyway, this, the story goes like this. Nicholas Gentile, or Gentile.

I don't know. A 37-year-old Italian pastry chef, come on. Come on. Uh, did not just want to pretend to be a hobbit. He wanted to live like one. First he bought a piece of land in the countryside of Buccioneco near the town of Chiaty in Abruzzo, where he and his wife started building their own personal shire from J.R. Tolkien's fictional Middle Earth. If you're going to pick a Middle Earth, Sure. Tulkans. I'd pick Tolkien's, yeah.

It's one of the better ones. I'm going to get ahead of this one and just say, this guy rules. Yeah, I was going to say, this sounds fucking sick. I want to know where he's getting his money from. But we'll get to that. Then, the the the the their to get their to get to get their to get to get the Rings fans. Not sure if those are two separate groups. Two separate things? Hey, I'm so glad you guys can come. And also the Lord of the Rings fans. All dressed as an elf, a dwarf, a hobbit, a sorcerer and humans. Saucer, I don't know about.

He walked more than 120 miles from Chiaty to Naples, crossing mountains and rivers to the quote one ring, a central plot element of the Lord of the Rings saga, into the Volcano Crater of Mount Vesuvius. Wonderful. A 200K walk is pretty good. That's so good. This rules. Like if he did this over a long weekend and was like, yeah, we walked 15 k's. I'd be like,

fuck off you nerd. But he's like, no, me and me and the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Me and th. Me and th. Me and th. Me and th. Me and th. Me and th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. the. tho. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to toe. C. C. C. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. th. toe. th. to c. toe. to c. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I th. I th. I tho. I tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho toean. toe. toe. toe. toe. I'd be like, fuck off, you nerd. But he's like, no, me and a bunch of friends in cosplay are walking 200 kilometers. That's astounding. I respect that. That's a long way. That's yeah, I got to respect it. It's commitment to the bit. Also, Mount Vesuvius, that's so badass. Yeah, it's really cool. that I'm forced to agree that this guy th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho, thi. thi. thi. tho, to to to to to to to th. th. th. the. thi. the. the. thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. to agree that this guy actually rules a little bit. Quite some time ago I realized that books and films were no longer enough for me to satisfy my passion for the fantasy genre and, in particular, for the Lord of the Ring saga. Gentile, that doesn't sound right, said, I was still reading about the lives of other people. Yeah, because they're fantasy books. I decided that I wanted to live my Hobbit life to to to to to to to to the to the to the to the the to the the their th life th life th life th life th life th life th life th life th because they're fantasy books. I decided that I wanted to live my

Hobbit life to the fullest. In the two hectares of land he bought, he's already built his first house where he lives with his family in Hobbit clothes, and his doors are also open to visitors. Here, the pastry chef, who has a degree in geology plans to build the caravan of the dwarves, the green dragon in, and a large version of Bilbo Baggins' house. And so we're talking a normal size house? Yes, so scaled up, I guess, so that he still feels like a hobbit in there. Yeah, okay. That'd be good, like you make it really big and then you feel very small, like a little

hobbock. Yeah, it feels so tiny and worthless. Yeah, like anyone could just step on me. It feels like a dragon just pick you up and eat you a whole. We do that bit any more times. It's going to start ringing some alarm bells I think. His goal is to transform this piece of a Brutso into a Hobbit village with an enjoining farmhouse where visitors will be able to live in a magical world, which, according to Gentile, is not too far away from the way people live in Butchianico. Over time I realize that my friends, my relatives, and the farmers of Butchianico have always lived as hobbits. They work like hobbits, carrying out jobs that are all in close contact with nature. They celebrate like Hobbits by organizing festivals and dances and

even dress up as Hobbits. They really are living their best life I gotta say. That kicks a lot of us. In Buccineco the festival of the Bandarasi is organized every year is one of the oldest festivals in Europe celebrated for almost 500 years in which people wear medieval clothes, sing songs, dance and dance and to to and and and and and to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the festivals and the festivals and d th th and th and the festivals and the festivals and the festivals and the festivals and the festivals and the festivals and the festivals and the festivals and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and the festivals the festivals th and the festivals the festivals the festivals and the festivals and the festivals their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the thea thea thea thea the the the thea the the the the th year is one of the oldest festivals in Europe celebrated for almost 500 years in which people wear medieval clothes, sing songs, dance and prepare typical local dishes. Those are Hobbit clothes, says Gentile. I realize that I have always lived in the Shire. The only thing missing was to become aware of it and build a village. I wanted people to enter my mind, my fantasy. Yeah, that's how it starts.

Yep. Yep. Oh, you are dressed in the Hobbit as well. Would you and your wife like to come back to my place for an appareatief? A Hobbit appareatief. Could you and your wife like to crawl inside my hole. In the mud. It's very tight. It's very small. Oh, come on now. Many make fun of us.

Some think I am trying to escape from reality. Far from it. I am living my dream, my adventure. By purchasing that piece of land, I have removed it from a reality that I don't like and am shaping it the way I want. Yeah, this is so much better than like escaping reality by going to Disneyland. Yeah. Or something, right? Like escaping your fucking terrible job by going and participating in a worse form of capitalism. Versus just hanging out in a field with your bods. Yeah, 24-hour pop-copp it cosplay. Pretending to live in the shire if you are, just just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, th, th, th, th, th, like, th, th, th, th, like, like, thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like thi, thi-a, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like thi. Like, like, like, like, like, like thi-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-s. Like, thi-s, thi-s, thi-s, thi-s, thi-s, thi-s. Like, escaping thi-a''a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'er-s, escaping, escaping, thi-s. Yeah, 24-hour hobbit cosplay. Pretending to live in the shire if you are,

just like spending 12 hours a day harvesting turnips. Yeah, also if you've got the right fantasy, right? Like if your fantasy is just to kick up your huge stinky feet, like by a river or something, that kicks us. That's a great thing to want to do. I mean, like, all of this is a this is is is is is is is a this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a life is a life is a thiiia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, thi, thi, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, thi, thi, thi, tom. tom. tom. tom. to, to, to, to, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi, the thi, thi, thi. thi. toing. teauoing. teau. teau. teau. teau. teau. teau. teau. tea. thing to want to do. I mean like all of this is a lifestyle that if you removed the dressing up and living as a hobbit part of it, I would respect immensely. Like what does he want to do? He wants to smoke a ton of pipe weed.

He wants to eat seven to eight meals a day. He wants to kick up his feet by a river. He wants to go to a pub where where all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all to to to to to to to go to go to go to to go to a pub where all of his friends are. Yeah. Yeah. And so that's you describing you. What about this guy? This is honestly the lifestyle I'm currently living at the moment.

It's pretty good. With those big nasty feet as well. I do have large nasty feet. Are they hairy? How hairy? Everybody. Everybody calm down. He says his county will be called the Contea Gentile. Still, I'm struggling with that. It doesn't sound to tell you to me. Because of a copyright issue. So like Warner Brothers or the Tolkien Estate have been like,

hey, you can't call your house the shire. Which seems shit to me. You should be able to. Why the fuck kind? You can call your house whatever you want. That's the exact level of freedom I believe we need. Yep. I think it's a good move we stopped naming houses. Yeah. Yeah. You know that? It's just all the ones around Queensland where it's just like the combination of two names. I do know that specifically. But you're so far removed from it that it's just like you're living in some randoms house and now it's called like Glen Renoa.

No. Hmm. No, that's the first thing to go. Yeah. Or they're all called Dun Roman or whatever. What are you talking about? Are you saying Queensland words right now? Queenslanders, Queenslanders, Queenslanders, Queenslanders, Queenslanders, Queensland, Queensland, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi's thi's thi's thiii's just just just like like, thiiiiiiii to name their houses by combining their first, like combination of their two first names. So like my auntie and uncle's house. Yeah, my auntie, auntie and uncle Warren's house was

Waranda. Yeah, that's beautiful. No, it's not. Right. That's gorgeous. I love that. This is some bizarre Queensland behavior. This is fucking wild. Honestly, I think the thing that Queensland has for it the most in terms of like a distinct cultural difference to the rest of the states is our houses all look weird and we write weird shit on them. And I think that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their theirensens. theirens. theirens. theirns. theirns. theirns. theirns. theirns. theirn. theirn't. theirn't. th. th. the. thearns. the. thea. theauu. thea. thea' thea' the. the. the. the. think that's really beautiful. Yeah, okay. All right. You guys have just got fucking, what's terrace houses? And those are awful.

Tramps. What do you mean you guys? What do you mean you guys? We had tramps? I mean you know you southern people, southern folk. Actually no, the houses in Hobart are all fucking gorgeous. These little workers cottages they're all like a hundred years old. They're fucking-yeah. And all my colleagues are always like, have you seen the house prices in Hobart? They're fucking crazy now. Look at this house, it's $600,000. And I'm like, oh, which is a 3,000 percent increase in what it was before they all became Airbnb like five years ago. Oh yeah, it sure is. Quote, the earth today is threatened by pollution and the climate emergency which are enemies as fearsome as Soron. Sauron. How do you say that? Souron. Yeah. We wanted to show that our land, like Tolkien's Middle

Earth, must be saved and protected. That's why we went there to throw the ring. That's why I walked 200 kilometers dressed as a hobbit to Mount Vesuvius because of climate change. 200 kilometers, my goodness. It's a big, big walk. I don't if you listen to podcast while I was doing that. I'm too much of an environmentalist to throw a piece of a piece of thiiolain into the crater and gave the ring to a little boy we met.

Hey child, what? You there, boy, take this ring, no questions. Do you not worry about the manner of our dressing? Now run. Quote, we met a lot of people over the course of those hundreds of kilometers and the affection they showed us was incredible. The people on the street opened the doors to their houses for us, gave us food, offered to host us in their houses and let us take a shower. I suspect.

What is this, if not magic? Honestly, that, because that's the pull quote they used for the first half of the headline, right? Which I thought would have been more about the Hobbit lifestyle than about the kindness of strangers. Yeah, and the sort of semi-vagrancy. Yeah, well, now it seems to wring a little bit more true for me. That is a nice sentiment that a bunch of people are like, hey, come in, we'll feed you, we'll give you a a a a the the the the the their a their a their a their a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat a cat their. That's sweet. They're doing the dream. It's nice. Now, my name's Tom Bombadil. You won't see me in the... They're all sleeping in Tom Bombadil's in the barn out the back. Whatever you do. Don't fuck Tom Bombardil's wife. I would beat Tom Bombardier with a lead pipe. I don't think he can be killed. As far as the law goes, he's one of the...

He's one of the... No, he's eternal. He's been around since the first age. Although, I'm in the middle of a re-read of the Lord the Rings at the moment. And, uh, Tolkien loves, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, to toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, told to to to to to to told told told told told told told told told told toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too, too, the, the, too, the, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, the. too, the, the, the Rings at the moment. And Tolkien loves sort of implying that a specific creature is like the oldest living thing, but he keeps doing it. He's like, ah, like someone will say in a bit of dialogue, Tom Bombadil is truly the oldest and then you get to the two towers and he's like, yes, tree beard is truly one of the first living things here and like, like, yeah, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi thi thi thi to thi thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, thiolk, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their they they they thi thi thi they thi they thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thioliiolk, t t t theauu theau theau tolk, tolk, tolk, tolk, tolk, tolk, tolk, the two towers and he's like, yes, Treebeard is truly one of the first living things here. And like, yeah, we get it.

Everything he is fucking old. Everything except like three of the main characters is a thousand years old. Roast him. Tolkien, you're on notice, sis. Get it together, Bestie. But it was Tom Bombadilier he was one of the oldest. Yeah, well, I was going to treat me it's pretty old as well. Yeah, he seems old. Now that we've paid our respects to this man and his lifestyle and his friends by saying that it's actually kind of cool, can I point your attention to the two photos that I've included?

Sort of professional photo shoot of. Of this man who looks a pipe, looking dope. But then, extremely weird-looking Italian Gandalf, knocking on his door. I love Italian Gandalf so much. He looks kind of confused about being there. He does. But, that Gandalf costume dope, he's kind of nice with it. He is kind of nice of it. Although, uh, didn't really do anything about how Gandalf was meant to have crazy ass eyebrows.

He's just got, he's got quite small eyebrows. You can't see him. He looks like Jim Penman. He does. It's Giuseppe Penman. Giuseppe Gandalf. Mithradir as he was known to the people of Rohan. Giseppe Pandel as he was known to the people of the people of the thrown.

Gendel. He was known to the people of Italy. Again, the Fde Blanco. Podcasts. They're nature's greatest natural resource and it's important that they're harvested sustainably. Editing, production, fart sound effects. These are all important resources from our local ecosystems. That's why we're asking you to go to Patreon. to co-Pontavista and pledge five US dollars a month to help support the healthy growth of a homegrown podcast like Bontavista.

In exchange you'll get an extra sustainably farmed episode every week, access to our Discord and a naturally pristine, promo-free podcast feed. Thank you for helping look after one of nature's most precious resources. Now Theo, you're going to have to engineer a segue here because... Well, I also need to do it without actually giving away what the story is as well to retain humor. You know what? So Lord of the Rings. Yeah.

Like a classic saga, right? But it's like, but we just keep retelling it. You've got the books, you've got the cartoons by Ralph Baxi. Ralph Bacci. You got the movies, you've got the Italian Lord of the Rings movies as well. You think of those Russian ones? Yeah, yeah, the ones that are very, very low fire. I'd love to watch that one day. I watched the Hobbit one while I was fucking stoned out of my mind and it was very unpleasant. We're not recommended to anyone.

You got the Lord of the Rings anime. You got the manga. You got, um, and so on and so forth. And like, you know how, you know how Zelda they just tell the same story over and over again in each one as well, you know, have to save to to to to to to to to to the the the their their their their their their their their their their their the just tell the same story over and over again in each one as well? You know, have to save the princess, blah blah, blah. You got retellings of Shakespeare, seven samurai, you know, because the core story is so good. That doesn't matter that you retell it again and again. And I want to tell you, such a cycle of story today.

And I think it's beautiful how this sort of story just repeats and repeats itself and keeps bubbling to the surface, sometimes in exactly the same way. We start off with a little story from the New York Post. Robert Steele was an ex-CIA counterintelligence expert and Qanonon devotee who is touring the US quote to awaken the nation in truth. Vice News interviewed him for a documentary on Qanon which he called quote the single greatest information operation in the history of humanity. Quote when we interviewed him he refused to wear a mask quote, the single greatest information operation in the history of humanity.

Quote, when we interviewed him, he refused to wear a mask and claimed he was the first person to call COVID hoax, tweeted Jack Bryan who write the vice documentary Q& on the search for Q. As well as being a prominent COVID denial, Steele was reviled for being an known anti-Semitic conspiracist, according to the Institute for Research and Educational Human Rights. Quote, I will not take the vaccination, he says, though I did test positive for whatever they're calling COVID today. He wrote alongside an image that appeared to show him hooked up on a ventilator.

Quote, the bottom line is that my lungs are not functioning, he wrote, admitting that even then it had been a near-death experience. We will never be the same because now we know that we've all been lied to about everything, added Steele, who calls himself a former spy and marine. His friend Mark Tarsi revealed the death of the great patron and Instagram post on Sunday, calling it, quote, very suspicious that Steele died from this quote typical respiratory thing refusing to say the word COVID. Hmm. I just a satisfying narrative arc. I can see why that might have become a sort of like an oral tradition of story we tell over and over.

Over and over. Sometimes,. Sometimes days apart sometimes all within month of August. Yeah. This from the Daily Beast. H. Scott Appley is a Dickinson City Council member and State Republican executive committee member Staunch Conservative and Devout Christian but based on his social media activity apley didn't believe COVID was going to affect him or his family. In May Appley posted an invitation for a, quote, mask burning, being held at a bar in Cincinnati, commenting, I wish I lived in the area. A couple of weeks earlier, he posted a news article about giveaways and incentives meant

to encourage people to get vaccinated writing, quote, disgusting. Appley also railed against so-called vaccine passports, which restrict high-risk activities, such as indoor dining, to the fully vaccinated. Recently, he suggested that the mask mandates in Germany were akin to Nazism, and, which they're not, by the way. That's not the, like, the thing wasn't that the, um, that the polls, you know, got to wear masks and survive. Like, you know, they weren't shuffling Jewish people off because they were, like,

sort of, it's sort of a very bad. Yeah, it seems almost impossible to draw a parallel there unless you're a complete fucking idiot. Yeah. Yeah. Well, good news, Ben. Oh. And when a former Baltimore Health Commissioner, Leanna Wynn, celebrated good news this spring about the Pfizer's efficacy, a seemingly outraged aptly called her, quote, an absolute enemy of the free people. In one of his numerous Facebook posts on the subject,

Appley wrote, question, if businesses start allowing customers and employees to go mask free with voluntary, only with voluntarily providing their vaccination record in brackets, presumably not a HIPAA, I spelled that H-I-DWPA. Wouldn't that basically involuntarily identify people who have chosen not to get vaccinated in brackets which might be indirectly creating a HIPAA again violation question mark. Yeah I think that's the I think that's the point that you're not allowed to go in if you're not vaccinated. Hmm. I as sort of a yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You'd have to be able to identify them to do that.

To, yeah. One way, it is sort of a binary thing. It's not some sort of mystery. On July 30th, Appley reposted a meme on his Facebook page that said, quote, in six months we've gone from the Vax, to you can still get COVID even if faxed, to you can pass COVID onto others even if faxed, to you can still die of COVID even if faxed, to the unvaxed are killing the

vaxed. Simple A to B through CDEF and G. It's an odd order to put those letters in. Sure is. Dickinson City Council member and state Republican Executive Committee member H. Scott Aspley, rather, 45 died in a local hospital around 3 a.m. Wednesday, the 4th of August. He was admitted to the facility in Galveston on Sunday with quote, pneumonia-like symptoms and was hooked up to a ventilator as his condition worsened. His wife was also infected, the family said. If you don't feel good about this, we'll get into that at the end.

Because so hold off feeling bad until the end. Yeah. Yeah. Because we'll tell you why it's okay. And spoiler rats because it's very funny. Probably some more more to that. Dick Farrell, 65, an anti-vaccine right-wing radio host in West Palm Beach, Florida used his local talk show and social media to rail against Dr. Anthony Fauci, who he called, quote, a power-tripping, lying freak, and said that no one should get the coronavirus vaccine. Our Farrell wrote in early July, quote, vaccine bogus bullshit, an H-I-D. I love it, you're 65, yeah, I love that how they like,

yeah, can't swear even though, yeah, anti-censorship. Two peeps, I know, comma, got vaxed, comma, now have Corona, comma, hospitalized critical. Thank you, Moderna, comma, hospitalized critical. Thank you, Moderna, comma, for nothing. He erroneously told his followers that they would not need the vaccine if they already had survived COVID-19. CDC has advised former coronavirus patients to get vaccinated.

All right, I'll just get into it now. Right, the reason this is funny is because they're, that people are literally dying because of these fuckets. Yeah. Yeah, they're, that people literally dying because of these fuck hits. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you're actively making other people die because you're like, ah, you need a fucking vaccine, then it is funny objectively when you die from COVID.

Extremely funny. If your whole thing is like the, the WHO has said, um, we've actually, we've actually lost track of all of the tigers, but we're pretty certain that they're in and around city areas in America, people are actively getting eaten. And your whole thing was like, first of all, tigers don't exist, but second of all, my immune system makes me completely immune to the effects of tigers. I drink a ton of milk, so there's no way a tiger could to tode ti ti ti tiii ti ti ti ti ti., ti. ti. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I'm, thi. thi. I's, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. I's, their. I's, their. T. T. T. I's, their. T. T. I's, th. I's, th. I's, thi. I's, thi. I's, thi. I's, thi. I'm, thi. I'ma. I'ma. I'ma. I'ma. th. th. th. th. their th. their th. their th. their their their. their. their. their. their. drink a ton of milk so there's no way a tiger could kill me. Couldn't pierce my brain pan with its like four

inch. I'm built different. A tiger could never crush my skull like a pathetic wet, crunchy meat sack. And then that person then gets eaten by a target. That is funny. That's the, it's funny, it's cosmic, the wheel of calm turning. It's the divine comedy, yeah. It's also maybe the best thing. The best thing that they could do to like undo the harm that they've done. 100% yes. Like they, their whole bit for the last, you know, 40 or 50 years now has just been going on on radio and saying

Whatever they want, because who's gonna stop you? And there's like finally a thing that Targets them specifically for doing exactly that thing extremely funny. So Glad we got that out of the way two days later. He wrote quote, why take a Vax prompted by people who lied to you, spelled like a teenage texting, all along about masks? He called Fauci Foochee? Don't get that one at all. That's good.

I can, I can, I can appreciate these Fauci roasts. And said the infectious disease expert and quote power trip Libloons Democrats were conspiring to make it seem like the pandemic was ongoing. Yeah that sure was. More power. Hey that pandemic thing's still going we think we do a better job at it. So maybe vote for us is what he's describing I think. Yeah I think so. I mean the Democrats are sick guys. Oh absolutely. Yeah I'm under them there. In late June he wrote quote, so you think it wasn't a scam demic? Oh got it. Damn. Not one elected Democrat ever tested positive. He called masks, quote, face diapers and, quote, face panties.

Amy Lee Hare, a close friend of Farrell, wrote on Facebook, COVID took one of my best friends, REP Dick Farrell. Here's the reason I took the shot. He texted me and told me to, quote, get it. He told me this virus is no joke and he said quote, I wish I had gotten it. And Ben if you can edit in horns. A.I.I.F. there. Yeah, I'll see what I end up doing but. Damn it's so fucking, I don't even know if funny is the right word, but when was this?

This was in like August, right? Like last month, to look at like 600,000 deaths in the US and be like, okay, whatever. But then, I have not got it worked out one bit by this point. Yeah, and then for you to get very sick and say, oh, it's no joke. I would say that like over half a million deaths would probably, for me, convince me that it that like over half a million deaths would probably for me convince me that it was no joke. Yeah. But I mean no Democrats got it apparently which I don't think is even true. That can't be true. No surely not. There's a much less funny angle to this. There's a subreddit that's like the Herman Kane Award for catching coronavirus. For dying of COVID. Of course, Herman Kane being the presidential nominee for the Republican Party who was doing

all of the same things and then died of coronavirus and then his account continued to post about why the virus was fake. Yeah. Amazing. Amazing. Commitment to the bit after you die is like unmatched. But yeah, that Reddit is much more sad with the people that have been lied to by these people going, you know, I'm not getting it blah blah blah and then immediately dying.

So that's a sad part. It's like a one in 525 Americans. Yeah, one in every 525 Americans have died of COVID since the pandemic started. Look to your left. Look to your right. Jesus Christ. Look 518 other directions. If none of those people have died of coronavirus, you are

currently dying of coronavirus. That's right. Just to finish this one off from Vanity Fair, instead of taking scientifically backed precautions beforehand, Farrell opted to ask his Facebook followers if quote hydroxychloriclore queen from Canada is safe in early July after stating quote when a government denies you access to HCQ obvious they want you dead which is kind of like a joke thing that you would write that that someone would think about posting that's a Stuart Lee description of an American. Hmm.

Yes. Yes. Yeah. Not an actual person. Or not an actual person. took, told to tuce. Todd Tucker, radio programmer, posted on his Facebook,

sorry, radio programmer, host and mega-trump fan. Please stop bragging that you got your COVID vaccine. What do you want us to say? Congratulations Labrat. Eye roll emoji looking scared emoji. This is from Ramp 247. We were saddened to learn that veteran programmer Todd Tucker, OM of Sendler Broadcasting Group in Alexandria, LA died Wednesday, Wednesday, August 11th due to complications from COVID-19. He was 60 years old at press time Tucker's father Bob Tucker and his stepmother's Sydney were also

battling COVID. Jesus. What a nightmare? What are they? What a terrible place? Can I just, sorry, in that, the the thing that he posted to his Facebook there, the two emogies that he's got the bottom. So the first one is the sort of eye roll emoji that you would use after saying something sarcastic. But the second one is the eyes wide eyebrows raised with a blush, which to me is the emoji you would send if like, yeah, say you were sexting someone and they sent you a picture of their dick and it was like enormously terrifyingly big you'd send that oh my goodness oh my goodness I am white-eyed and blushing yeah I don't I think he's emoji game there is a little like that's a strange

combination little off yeah hmm from the Miami Herald Jimmy DeYoung a Christian radio broadcaster questioned the COVID-19 vaccines I wonder if they were a form of government controlled died Sunday following a short battle with the COVID-19 vaccines. I wonder if they were a form of government control, died Sunday following a short battle with the virus. Short battle is not a... That's rough. That's pretty rough. It's not good. It's not good.

Mark Bernier, who from all accounts, seems to have been a gigantic piece of... Sorry, I don't mean to give away that this guy died of coronavirus right out of the gate. What? What? Huge piece of shit. Conservative radio host. I've assembled some tweets here. Get this, everybody. MIT biologists said, fear-mongering on coronavirus will go down as biggest fraud to manipulate

economies. And he's got some sort of bullshit link in there from March. Oh no, that's American dates. That would be December 2020. Another tweet. Bombshell lawsuit charges vaccine deaths being concealed. Another tweet should say, sorry, this is a quote tweet. The tweet he's quoting is saying,

The Greatest Generation had to defeat the Nazis to preserve our way of life. You're only being asked to get a shot, so be a patriot, turn off the TV and go get vaccinated. And his normal take on this is, that should say, quote, now the US government is acting like Nazis get the shot. Again, that's what the Nazis did right. They made people get health care.. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. tweet. tweet. tweet. tweet. twee. tweet. tweet. twee. today. today. today. today. t. t. doesn't work. That's what the Nazis did, right? They made people get vaccinations.

They made people get health care. I've never read a single book in my life. And he won't. From the Daily Beast, Mark Bernier 65, who had characterized himself as quote Mr. Anti-Vax on on his weekday WNDB. Is there a Mrs. Anti-Vax? I think so. I'm sure that is. Widowed. WNDB radio show from Daytona Breach died after a three-week fight against the virus. Station officials announced late Saturday. This from News Channel 5, Conservative Talk radio host Phil Valentine voiced skepticists. I'm worried about their radio hosts. RIP, Daddy. My only father.

You don't know? You don't know? It's just, I don't want you to, you're in the, you're in the movie theory, yelling out potential endings at the screen. Let me see. Oh. Are you going to do something crazy? Norks. Conservative talk radio host, Phil Valentine voiced skepticism about the code of COVID, and the

code of COVID-19 vaccine. And December 2020, tweeted, quote, I have a very low risk of, A, getting COVID. And B, dying of it if I do. Well, that's the thing about one and a million chances. They happen. They happen every 100 times. Yeah, if you're a conservative. Okay, why would I...

Why would you tweet, I will never die of COVID? A piano will never fall on me. Yeah, you're asking for it to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the th. to the to the to to to the to the to th. th. to th. toe th. toe, thoe, thoe, to be toe, thi, thoen, tho to be, to be, tho tho tho th. th. th. th. I, tho. I, tho. I, tho. I, th. I, th. I, th..... I, th..... I, th... I, t. I, t. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm a te. I'm a te. I'm a te. te. tea. tea.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. I'm, te. D. D. I'm will never fall on me. Yeah, you're asking for it. Well why would I risk getting a heart attack or paralysis by getting the vaccine. Good point, Phil. He even recorded a parody song, Vaxman, mocking the vaccine. I wish we had that ready to go right now. I wish we had that ready in the chat to go. Well, if I finally we had the technology and I know I'd the that that. thi thor thor thor thor thor thor thor thi to to thi thi thi that to that that that that that that that that that that that to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the the the. thee. the thee. thee. thee an toe. the. to to the to to ready to go right now. I wish we had that ready in the chat to go. Well, if only we had the technology and a soundboard that worked, but Andrews not here, so what you're going to do? Yeah.

In July, he told his audience he had COVID and expected to be back soon. But later updates from family and friends indicated how serious it was. Valentine's brother said Phil regretted not being the to to wrote if he got back on the radio he would encourage people to get vaccinated. According to family, Valentine fought hard but was unable to beat the virus. Fuck him. If only if he had some kind of vaccine. If only there was something you could just go on... Yeah. You'll Vax. Like there's... There's a lot to be said only there was something you could just go and... Yeah. Your vax? Like, there's a lot to be said for the fact that a lot of people's hesitancy to get the

vaccine and to use the normal treatments for things is that, like, that the issues that have brought them to this place are structural, right. Yeah. Bad souls and brains, you know, these are just straight up bad brains. But these are fucking people who are doing this. These are the forces, yeah. These, you know, they have their own perverse incentives to be like this, but they are essentially killing people for profit at this. Like, yeah. You know, the fucking...

It makes sense for them to do this crazy, heightened point of view thing. Because that's what gets people to listen. You get nut jobs in on it, and you know, it's like that... extremes of anything make media popular, which is why only crazy YouTube videos get views and whatever but like these people are just nakedly leaning into that for money for success and they're horrible fucking bastards. And something that something that I sort of pointed out a few times on Twitter is there there seems to be a rank that you reach where so you're all kind of crawling around in the crab bucket, right, with the rest of your horrible, conservative crabs, and there's a point where you get enough money, enough reach that they scoop you out of the bucket.

And Rush Rimbor kind of like takes the cigar out of his mouth, says, you know, I'll never die of, you know, smoking smoking but by the way everything else is fake and we don't actually believe it and these guys are still down in the bucket yeah where they don't realize that it's all fake that it's that like the bit is just a bit they believe it they're like no no no we actually have completely wasted brains. We're, you know that picture of the crab? And it's about to get, and sorry to anybody, the picture is awful, but he's about to get his brain snipped off? Sure. You ever seen that? I don't know if I've seen that, no. They're after that. Yeah. Okay, yeah, once their brains

been snipped, they've had a little brain sniff. And then they push them back in the big swinging chair. They go on radio and they say everything's fake, don't believe it, nothing matters. And then they die of coronavirus. Yeah. And then hopefully some people, I mean, I'm sure that for every person who's like, oh, fuck, I do need to start taking this seriously, there's people that are more galvanized who are just like, oh, now the New World Order is killing off all of radio hosts. Yeah. And it's not just like, well, like the first one in this. It's like, oh, isn't it's it the the the the the the the the the the the new the new the new the the new the new the the new the the the new the new the the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new the new th. thi thi. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the that the that that like the first one in this is like, oh isn't it weird how all the people that aren't vaccinated are dying now? Isn't it weird other people who... So weird. Never stayed inside would like going out on

purpose and having fucking... Yeah, having coughing parties. Yeah, no, there's a bunch of posts like that where it's like one of these people dies after saying that COVID's fucking fake and it's like isn't it just interesting that they died? It's so weird. Is it so weird? And that none of them, none of the people that are being vaccinated are being killed off. Is it odd that the people that say that you shouldn't wear seatbelts keep dying in car accidents? So strange. The government's doing it. I wish my brain was much much much mush. It would be blissful. Honestly. So good. My brain's pretty mush, but it doesn't present in these ways.

Yeah, it's the wrong kind of mush in there. It actually sucks. There's no reasoning with these people. There's nothing that you can do to convince these people that are so far down the rabbit hole, because any kind of fact is just, you you know dismissed as the mainstream media like scientists are in the mainstream media. Any sort of like emotional appeal is dismissed as you just being like brainwashed like yeah I genuinely. I don't know what the fucking answer is here and like so many of these people have been clinging on to this for so long that it's

impossible imagine that they'll suddenly have this brain snap where they're like oh wait a damn second the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their the the their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the their their their their their their th. I's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th th. th. th thu. th the the an the an the an the an the an the an thean the an thean the an the an the an the an the it's impossible, imagine that they'll suddenly have this brain snap where they're like, oh, wait a damn second. A friend of mine was talking to me about how his dad gone into Q-or-Non at some point, because his dad, who previously had not been a very internet person, started joining a bunch of like conservative Facebook groups and stuff, and they ended up getting into Q shit and then after the like January 6th election stuff and then Biden eventually just taking office and none of the Q stuff coming to bear he was just like huh huh huh yeah yeah I guess that was a a bit of a G up huh? Really? And like that was his entire reaction to it was just being like, that was just been like, huh? Huh? Yeah, I guess that was a bit of a G up, huh? Really?

And like that was his entire reaction to it, it was just being like, oh wow, that was, uh, yeah, none of that was true. He just had that moment of just being like, I guess that was bullshit. But I think he maybe wasn't ever fully invested into it as just like, you know, as an Australian guy watching this shit from a far and being like something going on there and it being like, oh no, no, no. I don't think there is. Man, it's weird. I just, I don't know what you do. I just have to hope that's...

You can like, you can like, to intervene at early stages. So often my mom, who is a boomer that that that thi's, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't th- I don't th, I don't th, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't thin, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I, I, I, I, I don't, I, I, I, I don't, I don't, I don't, I, I don't, I, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thi. thi. thi. It's thi. It's thi, don't thi, thi, bar, bar, bar, black sheep and like shit like that where I'm like, yeah, like my mom to tell so many people about that one specifically in person where I've been like, it was like one kindergarten class in the UK 10 years ago or whatever. And it's that every week, like it wasn't specifically that one, but it was something my mom came to me with and I was like, all right, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. Like, th. I, th. I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I a smart person. And I was like, like, you need to just look at, like, where did that come from? Look at that new story. Was it from one person, or are they trying to ban you saying that word? And like, I think you can kind of intervene at early stages like that, but then once they're deep in a rabbit hole, you're, you're fared....... Yeah, you, you, thi. Yeah, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. It, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. that, that, that, that, that, that, thi. that, thi. thi. thi. thi. th fucked. Yeah, but there's a certain kind of media literacy where you just have to be like, uh, nearly everything you see is a slight misrepresentation of what actually happened because you kind of have to exaggerate

to get traffic so. Yeah, that's what I explained. Yeah, pretty much. It's great. It's good. Our parents are all going to be just completely cooked. Doesn't you want to, thrown it, to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, that, to, that, to, that, that, that, that, that, that, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to, thi, th th th th th th to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to, to, to to to to to to to to to th th th thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to to you want to listen to this podcast? I doubt she's, she used to, but I doubt she's listening to it regularly if so. If you are, learn to learn to look for sources in your media. Just double check, just a quick double check. Just a little quick. Just Google what you've read in one daily mail story. Just cross-check, you know? Don't read the fucking daily mail, that's the start. Just don't at all. That's where you went real. So that story of people who keep saying COVID is fake and then dying of COVID is probably a story that we're going to be returning to over and over and over again. And speaking of returning

to things, it's time to go back to a segment that we have already done so far, but I didn't put one after the other for some reason in the notes. We're going back to the hole report. I actually really love this hole. I think it's a unique hole, and I think it's difficult, and I think it's going roller, and we don't want to put all your holes in one basket. You don't want to have the h the the the the the the the the the the the the the to have the hole to have to have to have their to have to have to have to have their to have to have to have their to have to have the whole to have the whole the whole to have the whole the whole the whole to have to to to to to the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole the hole tho tho. to. toooooooooooooooooooooo don't want to have two holes right next to each other. That'd be terrible design. This is a story from the website, live science, live science. Live science. This is a story from the website live mass.

First preserved dinosaur butt hole is quote, un perfect and quote, unique, paleontologist says. That's a mirror. That's a mirror. Paleontologist says is a crazy way to lead off this story. Because presumably it's about a new scientific development, but you have made the story that one paleontologist has described a butthole as perfect. Which is nice? Yeah.

They're trying to be funny with it, but I also don't hate the framing either. No, sure. I mean, honestly, I respect the hustle. The first dinosaur butthole ever discovered is shedding light where the sun don't shine. Yeah. Having fun with it. The discovery reveals how dinosaurs use this multi-purpose opening, scientifically known as a cloakeal vent for pooping, peeing, breeding and egg-laying. It's really an all-in-one hole. Yeah. What the cloaca is for? It's for everything. The question is what the cloaq isn't for?

What cloud I've got two holes, you know? Yeah, I'm happy with my current number of holes. I'm not thinking about the normal amount. Removing or adding any at this point. I wouldn't like just one hole. That'd be upsetting. I don't think that's on the cards for you unless something really horrible hap-anus. I will never get a cloaca this is me. I don't think that's on the cards for you, unless something really fucking horrible happens, you're probably fine. Unfercated, anus. I will never get a cloaca. This is me saying it.

On the podcast, I will never have a cloaca. Unforcated? Unforcated? Antifurcated? I don't know. Although this dinosaurs' caboose, come on now, shares some characteristics with the back sides of some living creatures, it's also a one-of-a-kind opening. The research is found.

The anatomy is unique, study-lead researcher Jacob Vinther, a paleo-biologist at the University of Bristol in the United Kingdom, told live science. It doesn't quite look like the opening on birds, which are the closest living relatives of dinosaurs. It does look a bit like the back opening on a crocodile, he said, but it's different in some ways. Hey, you know a bird's ass-hole? Nothing like that. None of this is helping me.

I don't think I've ever looked at a bird's asshole. Do you know a crocodile's a chance? Now I'll speak my language. Well, it's like that but different. It's sort of different, right? Uh, it's its own cloaca, shaped in its perfect, unique way, Vinther said. Oh, I can't believe the, uh, they're finally just like,

quoting the theme song for this. Someone is enthusiastic about holes as we are. They're finally just like quoting the theme song for this. Someone is enthusiastic about holes as we are. The well-preserved booty belongs to the dinosaur Sitticosaurus, a bristly-tailed labrador-sized horn-faced dinosaur, meaning it was a relative of triceratops. Previously, Ventrini's colleagues had studied the satacosaurus specimen found in China to determine its skin color, and at the time he noted that its nether regions were preserved. Hey, does that look like a dinosaur's asshole to you? I just feel like

you don't have to be euphemistic if you're talking about dinosaur junk. Yeah, damn baby, that asshole looks well preserved. You got an asshole of easily someone 350 million years younger than you. Damn, bitch, that asshole been in amber for the past several thousand years. Oh. Then I got a chance to look at the specimen again up close and suddenly realized, Oh my God, the cloaker is actually quite well preserved and we can actually see some anatomy that I didn't think we could see. What is there to see in a hole?

Yeah, what is there? It's a... Well, you know, gaze into a hole and you also gaze into yourself. Uh, so he took a closer look with study co-researchers, Robert Nichols, a paleo artist, and Diane Kelly, an expert on vertebrate penises and copulatory systems at the University of Massachusetts Amherst. You've got to do what you love. Oh my guys, it's so good. So what do you do? Dinosaur dicks. And also whatever other bits they use for fucking. You ever fucking heard of dinosaurs? Yeah you have. You ever heard of their dicks?

You ever seen a bird's asshole? Well, it's nothing like that. None of the reproductive soft tissues, like a penis, None of the reproductive soft tissues, like a penis, were preserved, maybe on your body. So the researchers can't say whether the dinosaur was male or female. Even so, this dinosaur likely had copulatory sex, unlike some birds that bump butts when they do a cloakeal kiss during reproduction. That is so upsetting to me. So they're doing like a... Sorry, a what? They're scissering a little bit. They're scissering their cloakers together.

Cloaico kiss. They're doing a colloquial kiss. One of the most romantic gestures you can do. It's very intimate. To get a more complete picture of Siticosaurus, Scytosaurus, I'm going to struggle with that every time. Sitticusaurus, yeah. Getting more complete picture of Scytosaurus as colloquial vent, Kelly compared it with those of living land vertebrates. The vent is the opening and the colliaga, which comes from the Latin word for sewer, is the muscular chamber behind it. Don't call it muscular.

That's weird. I think they mean that it's, muscles not so much that it's like stacked. Based on its preserved anatomy, the opening could have either been horizontally oriented like a theirdicloky, like a crocodile cloaker, she said. Moreover, the team noticed that the outer regions of the cloaker were covered with a dark shade of melanin. Perhaps this darkly pigmented area was a that the outer regions of the cloaker were covered with a dark shade of melanin. Perhaps this darkly pigmented area was a type of visual display, similar to bright red butts seen in baboons, the researchers said.

Now they're just getting fun with it, I think. They are. Yeah, their assholes could have been for like, you know, showing don't don't. Neon-donnawins. They. They. The reddish-brown Cytoceros was counter-shaded, meaning it had a dark back and a light underside, so its pigmented posterior would have stood out, he said. This dark melanin may have also provided anti-microbial protection. The pigmented lobes on each side of the dinosaur's anal opening

might have held musk secreting glands, the researcher added. These glands are found in both male and female crocodilians, and in those creatures they release a fatty, smelly substance during courtship. Kelly told life signs, ah, they secrete Polish food. Just like in most land vertebrates, except for mammals, which have more than one hole for the defecation urination reproduction, this dinosaur used its hole for everything, which explains, oh come on, which explains why researchers found a fossilized poop in its butt. Just word this in any other way. Grow up! It's like a Swiss army knife of excretory openings, Finther said.

It does everything. That's truly beautiful. Thank you so much for reading that article for us. That is a very thorough whole report. Learn more about a whole. Perfectly present-hunt report. Ah, God damn. Well, I think that's about everything we've got time for this week.

What do we have? A bunch of guys dying. We had a butt hole in detail. Yeah. We did. And then we had another Italian guy. And then we had another Italian guy. And that's basically a typical episode of this podcast.

Yeah. Check out the merch shop. Subscribe if you haven't already. We need that cash. I'm buying a new car, so you know, Falcon's on its way out. We'll catch you next week. Until then, stay frosting.