Boonta Vista - EPISODE 26: Eat Shit, Lyle

Episode Date: December 13, 2017

Andrew, Lucy and Theo are all politely shaking hands over the legalisation of same sex marriage. We also have several suggestions for the head of the Australian Christian Lobby. Clearly Sam Dastyari knew we were going to have a segment about him because he has announced his resignation the day before release, like a coward. We're also checking in on the world's foremost American Pie enthusiast in the latest edition of Wide World Of Where's Warnie. Support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista Don't forget to rate & subscribe on iTunes if that's your thing. _____________________________ Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista iTunes: tinyurl.com/y8d5aenm Stitcher: www.stitcher.com/s?fid=144888&refid=stpr Pocket Casts: pca.st/SPZB RSS: tinyurl.com/kq84ddb Ear Buds Network: earbudsnetwork.com

Welcome to Bentevister Socialist Club, episode 26. I am Andrew, and I'm here with Lucy. Hello and eat shit, Lyle Shelton. And eat shit, Lyle Shelton. And also, you can hear our good friend there, Theo. Good evening and eat shit, Lyle Shelton. Hmm. You guys raise an interesting point because I'd just like to, I'd like to counter your argument with the idea that Lyle Sheldon should eat some shit. I'll have to agree with you there, Andrew. Yeah, I can't argue that. Yeah, so that's a thing that happened, folks, is since we spoke to you last, and we checked

in about the success of the Postal Survey and everything, and we exercised a little bit of, what what would you call, a cautious optimism about the idea that there might also be a whole bunch of fucking around, about weird and wacky amendments to the same-sex marriage bill on the grounds of like religious protections and all the stuff that Lyle Sheldon eat shit wants to be included in that whole thing. But as it turns out, I think the politicians around the place successfully read the room for the first time in many of their careers. And they just formed a block and voted down amendment after amendment after amendment to the bill.

There wasn't really any debate. It was just people reading out their things like David Laneholm's amendment to say it should be considered a form of racism to make fun of me for fucking the barrel of my gun. But no they all just got voted voted down and it and it's sailed through unamended in its pretty original form from Senator Dean Smith. Is he a senator or an MP? I don't know him, but good on him. He's the, he's the, the good openly gay, liberal. Not like, um, what's his name? Not like, like, what's his name? Not James Patterson, the other IPA guy, Tim

Wilson. Are you saying it's bad to be gay, Nanu? No, I'm saying it's not that awesome to do what Tim Wilson did and performatively propose to your partner during your speech in debate on the bill when it turns out that they've been engaged for nine years. Really? Yep. Damn, I missed this, that's wild. Yeah, I thought it was like a nice thing. No, yeah, you like...

Yeah, no, I thought it was a real thing. That actually, nice. We've got got got got got got. you got the wool pulled over your eyes. But yeah, so apparently like, you know, he's a member of a party that's been actively working against that whole time and he did a nice heartwarming proposal and his partner said yes, even though he'd already said yes at some point in the far flung distant past. But whatever, we can all be happy for him now to get married now that he can. Because we got gay marriage. And in traditional Australian fashion, our response to that was not to be happy, but to band together to tweet at Australian Christian Lobby's Lyle Shelton to say eat shit.

That's right. Pretty much everybody in Australia said it to him. Pretty much everybody. Yeah, to the extent that I believe it began to trend worldwide on Twitter. People who are not in Australia became confused. Who is this Lyle guy? Everybody was saying, I hear he should eat shit. I mean to be fair a lot of people can eat shit but especially Lyle. He can eat the most shit. That's that's my take. Just um yeah I thought it was interesting how, uh, not interesting. What's another word? Dumb. Fucking dumb., how Miranda Divine was writing,

obviously, you know, she got to immediately shift gears into like high-rev victims. Being atus. Yep. Won't somebody please think of the Catholic Church? And, yeah, so she wrote this piece, you know, oh, after all this talk about how love is love and love will win, actually, all these people were mean to Lyle Shelton, which means they don't believe in love. I guess... I don't believe in loving Lyle Sheldon.

I believe in him eating shit. I just, it's that classic thing of like this idea that, you know, everybody else in the world must be so incredibly cooked in their brain from thinking along purely hyperpartisan lines 24 hours a day that people are unable to hold like, you know, different opinions and different emotions within one human body and mind, like the idea that you can be really happy about the fact that no longer will your right to be married be discriminated against on the basis of your sexuality, but also that you can think that the guy who has spent years of his life virulently campaigning against you having those rights, and who also pretended,

throughout the entire campaign around the postal vote, vote. his life virulently campaigning against you having those rights and who also pretended throughout the entire campaign around the postal vote that he didn't see any of the stuff that was going on, you know, there was no homophobia happening, there were no people's windows getting broken, there were no people getting shouted out in the street or beaten up or anything like that. He didn't see any of that stuff. And people aren't allowed to also think that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that guy that guy that guy that guy that guy that guy's thi thi thi thi thi tho tho tho tho tho thi the the the tho tho thoe. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. the. the. the. te. te. teoooooo. te. te. te. teo. te. te. te. te. te. their. beaten up or anything like that. He didn't see any of that stuff. And people aren't allowed to also think that that guy's a piece of shit and lorded over him a little bit. It was respectful debate right up until the point where it became obvious that they were going

to horribly lose. As far as they're concerned, I think. Yep. And in the classic style of that type of hard right-winger where everything th. th. th. th. thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thing thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And th. And thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th're concerned, I think. Yep. And in the classic style of that type of hard right-winger, where everything is a slippery slope and some, you know, undefined point of horror that's going to occur in the future, they did immediately, of course, shift gears and start moving the goalposts. Like you said, even from the point that it became clear to them that they had not won, they were already talking about, oh, we told you everything's gonna change, everything's gonna change and trans stuff, gender fluidity, mystery penises, all of it, just flying in your face. That's right. Was it Peter Dutton? No, it was Eric Abetz. Yeah, they said, oh, now can all 34 genders get married? It's like, oh, it's cool.

Yeah, that's cool you're taking this so seriously and you have all the issues well covered. I love the, I genuinely love the reaction that a lot of people have to what are supposed to be like sarcastic and biting statements from, you know, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, from, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th and, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th and, th and, th and, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th and, the, the, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, threats, threats, threats, thi, the-a, the-a, threats, threats, thi-a, thi, thi, people have to what are supposed to be like sarcastic and biting statements from Christian conservatives like Erica Betts, where they say things like, oh, you know, so you think it's going to be fine in this future where if a boy feels more comfortable going to his school, wearing a dress that we should let that happen, and the reaction for everybody is, yeah, it's going to be fine in this future where if a boy feels more comfortable going to his school wearing a dress that we should let that happen and the reaction for everybody is yeah it's fine. Yeah, sure. Seems fine.

Yep, I'm glad we got that one's done. That one's in the books. Covered that one. Yep, fine. Nobody cares. So can we move on from that to, which I, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th, th, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, they, thi, thi, thi, thi., to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, thi., thi, they, they, theyto, which I think a lot, like a bunch of probably mean-spirited but at least cohesive arguments to Bob Katter? What about him? Well, before we move on, I think it's really important that we do take a moment to say that even, you know, this was a big moment in Australia. It was very serious for a lot of people, a lot of people were hurt,

a lot of people needed, you know, the support of their community, their friends and their loved ones. What's really important to remember is that Lyle just needs to hoe into a big, fucking steaming trough of that shit. Just slam down some turds. Oh, big diarrhea. Swallow a bunch of diarrhea. Big diarrhea slurpy on the side. Yeah, it's hard not to process this stuff through the lens of irony. I mean, when something actually, honestly, nice and good happens in Australia.

So I think it is important to step back and really take it in, take a deep breath of that rarefied democratic air and say, eat shit, Lull Shelton. Absolutely. I was genuinely affected by when the actual bill passed. And you know, there was absolutely everybody over one side of the chamber voting yes. There were four people, four or five people voting no, which was like Eric Betts and a couple other people. There were, it should be noted, it should be noted on the record, that there were, I think, six or seven people who abstained from the vote by leaving the chamber before they held the vote, and that was Tony Abbott,

Andrew Hastie, I think I want to say Barnaby Joyce, I'm not sure. And bear in mind, these are all people who campaigned hard on the no vote, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, I think I want to say Barnaby Joyce, I'm not sure, and bear in mind these are all people who campaigned hard on the no vote, right? They were out being the very public face of this thing. And when it came down to it at the end of the day, they couldn't bring themselves to sit there and cast their no vote, and they also couldn't bring themselves to say, you know, this is what th th th th th th th is what th is what th is what th is what th is what th is what th is what th is what th is what thi thi thi thi their thi their their their their their their to say, you know what, this is what my constituents have voted for, this is clearly what the public wants, we're the ones who, you know, framed this whole thing as we'll put the vote to the public and we'll see what they want and then we will pass that accordingly.

No, instead they had to sit and wait outside of their legs because if you abstain, their tails between their legs because if you abstain, your vote doesn't get recorded on Hansard for all of eternity. You get to just have the couple of people who said no and everybody else who did the right thing and you're just not written down in there. So we remember. You cowardly pieces of shit. It'll be on this podcast forever. That's right. But anyway I got distracted from my actual point, which is that I genuinely found myself moved when the bill was passed and there was much, much clapping and cheering and rejoicing in the gallery.

And then the public gallery, which was full of supporters of same-sex marriage, broke out into a what seemed like a pretty spontaneous rendition of We Are Australia. And it was really nice, as Theo was saying, to not get hung up in irony for a minute. And it was really nice to see something where like, I feel like Australia, you know, much like a lot of other Western countries, has a bit of a tendency for people to kind of wrap themselves in pretty empty, like, jingoism and nationalistic rhetoric

that can very often feel, you know, quite hollow and unearned. But it was really nice in that particular occasion to see that song in particular used in a way that really reflected what Australia can be and should ideally want to be at its best, which is, you know, a real lot. Yeah, it was just really good. And, um, could have-San though. It could have done K-San.

Could have done K-San. Look, there's a lot of choices, but one choice is clear, and that is that Lyle needs to eat some shit. Strong agree there. I will second the motion. E-shit. So, with that out of the way, Theo, please explain to us, please explain to us, besides Lyle eating shit, what we need to know about Bobcat.

So do you guys know about his speech that he gave? I, um, leading up to the vote? I do, I know a bit of it. No, this is not the, I'm not spending any time on it video. Okay. But do you, do you have the speech? It seems like a kind of joyous wonder I think compared to what we're talking about. And I think like you and I, Andrew, we talked about in the, in the lens of like, Queensland election, why Bob Catter, the Cater the party party party party party party party th is is th is th is, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, Andrew, we talked about in the lens of like Queensland election, why Bob Catter, then the Cata Party, you know, has done well where One Nation hasn't, you know, we talked

about perhaps they're not as fringe as One Nation, and then, you know, you get this sort of stuff where he's taken to it and given a very confused and muddled brew of hatred. So some of the choice quotes out of it, you want to talk about equality? Well, they wanted equality in the giving of blood. They said we have a right of homosexuals to give blood, and so they did, and I think it was 72 children were injected with AIDS from the blood that was given. It was all hushed up. Says that homosexual people are more likely to commit crimes. That there's no doubt that this is a DNA thing as far as that's concerned.

And it's sort of like, that's the as that's concerned. And it's sort of like that's the stuff that made sense syntactically as well. And then it's just like, I'll read this part but it doesn't, nothing scans, nothing, he's a very confused man. He said, you might say the majority rules and the majority has it right because there is a democracy. I think it was back in the year 2007 or 2011. I can't remember when a bloke called Barabbas ran and geez, he got a good vote. I can't help but point out the abolition of slavery.

We wanted on a trick. It was the only way they could get the abolition of slavery through the Parliament. So pedestrian captioned that with a bunch of question marks. Yeah, I kind of, it's, he is an intensely strange man, but he transitioned from that to a whole bunch of fun kind of population control stuff. So if you take out my cousin brothers, the first Australians, and then you take out the migrant population in Australia, then we have the lowest birth rate on earth. We are a vanishing race. Such wrote an article in which they said that the current population of Australia is 22 million. Within 100 years, the population of Australia will be 7,000. I thought, this is ridiculous. I went down to check it in the library. Please lead me to the white genocide section in the Atherton General Library.

And so it's just this whole mess of population control and just pure homophobia. He's got to be one of the strangest men to ever sit in parliament. In wild. And then Christopher Pine jumped in with one of my favorite quotes of the year, which is Bobby, this is rubbish. Yeah, well, yeah, it leads me to what I think is an interesting point, which is, like, obviously, it looked and sounded very much like somebody got their old racist uncle from far north Queensland, who hasn't really been around townies that much and told him to get up at a wedding and just talk for five minutes about what he understands homosexuality to be. You know, he's like, oh, well, have a really prudent speech. But here's something I heard from a guy in a pub in 78.

Like, yeah, like like I said, and none of it had any kind of relevance or bearing on anything that was actually up for discussion, which of course, you know, is very similar to any time he gets a chance to actually ask a question in Parliament. Apparently it's most of the time he just starts talking. It goes completely off the rails like that, and then at some stage somebody says, and you're out of time to ask your question, you don't get to ask a question. So, like, apart from the fact that it's very silly, it is also a complete waste of his constituents' time in the sense that he doesn't actually get to ask the government anything because he just kind of gets confused and lost for a while.

Can you imagine though, like, I think I would probably do the same thing? I think if I was in his in his shoes, not not give a horrible hateful speech about you know homosexuality or whatever, but I would I would probably just end up wasting the country's time just asking whatever it is that I feel like because um what are you supposed to do with that kind of power? No, nothing responsible. I don't think so. Yeah well By now, I'm sure everybody is familiar with the now notorious clip of Bob Katter saying yes, it's great the gay people can get married now. May a thousand blossoms bloom. May a thousand blossoms bloom. May a thousand blossoms bloom. Shortly before turning from Dr. Jekyll into Mr. Hyde, and then he says, but I ain't spending any time on it because of some

important crocodile-related conspiracies in Queensland. So it is for that reason that's intrepid Buzzfeed reporter Lane Sainty who I know the things. It's great that's thi th it's th it's th it's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi that's thi that's that's thi that's thi thi that's thi thi thatate thate thate thate thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheat, uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh. It's that's that for that reason that intrepid BuzzFeed reporter Lane Sainty who I think we can agree is everybody's hero for the way she has covered the entire issue from when it was going to be a plebiscite all the way through to now. She caught him after his speech and she asked him one question and I will read it to you. Lane Sainty says, Mr. Catter, just one question. Why did you choose to spend more time on marriage after saying you wouldn't? To which Bob Catter replies, well I had to say something, I couldn't let it go through without making some comment.

And I think that's a really nice encapsulation of the... I think that sums it up. Well, it's a nice a nice a nice to the nice to to the nice to to the nice nice nice to to the nice nice nice the to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to say to to to say to say to say to say to say to say to say saa saui saut a to say to say it to say it to say it to say it to say it to say it to say it to say it to say it to say it to say say say say say say say sanate sanate sanate sanate sanate sanate sanate sanate sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa sa saananananananananananananananananananananananananananan to say to say to say something to say something something to say something something saut. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. to say say say say say to without making some comment. And I think that's a really nice encapsulation of the... I think that sums it up. Well, it's a nice encapsulation of the entitled old white guy sentiment that a lot of people have a problem with these days, which is that it wasn't about him, it was nothing to do with him. He had already professed in the past that he didn't care about it, that he wasn't interested in it, his own comments strongly reflected the fact that he had no fucking idea what he was talking about when it came to the actual issue. But the most important thing is that his voice was heard on that day. Just... just silliness from Bob Gatter then.

I think we can all agree. We can also all agree that's, uh, Lyle Shelton, eat shit. Eat shit, Lyle. Eat shit, Lyle. So, good, good stuff all around. It is officially law. If you're gay and you want to get married, off you go. No more excuses. Do it. Do it.

Good to go ahead. Like the rest of us. Welcome to hell, bitches. That's right. So, moving on from that. We should now just dip in and check in on old friend of the show, Sam Dastieri, a humble purveyor of the Halal snack pack. I think he's a Russian spy at this point. A lot of a lot of Dastiary conspiracies. He's very very

Kremlin-centric Sam. Well look to the extent that the Chinese Communist Party would be communicating with Russia, then yeah, sure. I completely agree. So for context, for anybody who does not know about Sam Nestiari, any international listeners, Sam is a senator from New South Wales. He's actually an Iranian-born refugee who came in when he was very young and has you know grown up into this success story of a senator or the way that that Sam puts it. It is a it is a great success story for you know

migrants and refugees and everything like that which is all nice. Sam is also a a labor power broker. He is one of the factional warlord types who pretty much everybody hates on the basis of them just turning all of politics into just a game of power and influence. Yep. Yeah, you're right. You're probably right. Delete that. Remove that. Yeah. So you know he came he came through from being a lobbyist through to being, I think the, what is, was he the, chairman of the New South Wales Labour Party or whatever,

which was the kind of position that you, number one, need to be an absolutely cutthroat backstabbing politica to get into in the first place, and number two will result in you being able to be parachuted into some nice safe seat at some point like it was. So Sam's, Sam's Korea has generally been a very kind of, you know, he loves the media, loves the spotlight, loves to get on Q&A, have a Barney with Pauline Hansen, loves to have a bit of fun with her when he, when he reveals that he's from a Muslim country and she freaks out, which is good. So I don't know, I want to say around six months ago or something, Sam got into quite a

spot of trouble when it was revealed that on a trip to China, Sam had, I don't know if, like the gist was that he had forgotten to declare some stuff on his expenses, so he decided to ask a wealthy Chinese political donor to both pay for his like flights and accommodation and stuff and to pay for some legal bills of his, which is all very normal. Just a sugar daddy. Yeah, we've all got those that we need help from the Chinese government for. We've all got a rich benefactor. Yeah, I've got a rich, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to the the to the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some some the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the ti ti ti ti ti ti tie tie tiea tiea tiea tiea tiea tiea thi thi thi thi the all got those that we need help from the Chinese government from. We've all got a rich benefactor. Yeah, I've got a rich Chinese daddy. And in a turn of events that I'm sure was in absolutely no way related to receiving said money.

Sam then gave a speech somewhere in which he, rather than running his own Labour Party or the government of the day's policy on South China Sea, he instead pushed pretty hard on the Chinese angle on the South China Sea, which is China owns the South China Sea, get out of it it now. I don't know what's the right position Sea, get out of it now. I don't know what's the right position on this. Can someone guide me? Uh, look, it's not great. It's not a good look.

So Sam was, um, so Sam was, rather than being a citizen of another country, apparently there is absolutely nothing an MP or Senator can do anymore to get sacked other than being a citizen of another country. So he instead he was demoted from his position as deputy whip of the Senate and forced to take a bit of a backseat from his very prominent media duties. So fast forward, six months or whatever, however long it's been since I got blocked by Sam Nastyari on Twitter for talking about this And and he's into a bit of exactly the same kind of trouble he what was what was? Well, was the first thing the um? Yeah, the the very prominent Chinese donor that he had been

hanging out with was revealed that he had gone over to this guy's house and then said to him hey I think that your phone and some of the stuff in your house is bugged so let's go and have our conversations outside which sort of led people to the suggestion that he knew that this guy is someone who would be on under observation from ASEO and instead was helping him to circumvent being monitored by the Australian intelligence community, which again. It's just like, surely your career at this point would be like, oh, well, maybe people see me as possibly a little bit,

on the totally compromised by the Chinese government side. Maybe I should just stop doing this bullshit for a while. But no, no, why would you? But no. So things have been coming out in drips and drabs. There was also that the same donor who he warned about Asio recording him had applied for an Australian citizenship, except because of the fact that he is a very influential political donor to both parties and has very opaque ties to the to the Chinese government, Azo had blocked his citizenship application. so you know, you might think the Chinese government, Azo had blocked his citizenship application.

So, you know, you might think maybe there's a, maybe there's a reason that Azo have done that. So, he complained about it to Sam Dastieri, who then phoned the immigration office half a dozen times over the next couple of months, to personally intervene demanding that they fast-track this guy's citizenship application which again not a great look not a hundred percent not a good look let's super into it and I feel like there's been something else there's been one more too many yeah and they're pretty much they're one more thing to wait too many yeah and they pretty much they pretty much all relate to the same dude though something there was something else where he had oh well yeah where

he was like asking where he'd like asked a whole bunch of questions on different committees about what was effectively pushing China's position about various issues which are not in line with his own parties that he'd asked something like the the that the th th th th th th their th th. th. th. the the they they they they they they they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd their their their their their their to to to to the to to to to to the to to to to to to to the the to the the the the their their their the their the that that on different committees about what was effectively pushing China's position about various issues which are not in line with his own parties, that he'd asked something like 115 different questions on Senate committees about things that were very suspiciously aligned to China's political political interests. And then the most recent report that while Tanya Plybersek was in Hong Kong and she was

going to meet with some activists who were seeking independence for Hong Kong from China and she was contacted by Sam Dastiari to say don't you meet with those guys they're rebels against the Chinese. Jesus Christ! So at a certain point, at a certain, your position becomes a bit untenable. This whole situation has set, has set Ospole Boomer Twitter aflame with fresh conspiracy theories. To international listeners, that's basically your, it's basically your, like, your 50-year-old resistance, um, um, typeories. To international listeners, that's basically your, it's basically your 50-year-old resistance Twitter type people, who are absolutely convinced that everything that happens is like a Russian syop.

And anyone who argues with them on Twitter is a Russian bot? Yes, yes, so they're kind of are parallel to that. And I've seen like quite a few theories floating around about, their, about their theory's theories about, about, Twitter, um, um, um, um, um, um, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, about, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their their their their their their thi thi thi-twee, thi-tip, thi-t-t-t-tip, ty ty ty ty-tip, ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty ty thi-twey th, th, th, th, th, the, their their their their their their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi-twea, thi-twea, thi-twea, thi-twea, thi- kind of are parallel to that. And I've seen like quite a few theories floating around about this stuff with Sam, which are all very funny to me. But yeah, just like I said, at what point do you just pull the plug on it? I mean, how many of these types of... Oh, sorry, so that's what I was going to say. The conspiracy theory is that, is that like, is that, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, like, the, just pull the plug on it? I mean how many of these types of... Oh sorry, sorry, that's what I was going to say. The conspiracy theory is that is that like that the government have like directed Australia's spy agencies to leak this information in order to damage a political opponent. The more reliable report that I've seen in the sense that it was from a reasonable, what I think of is a reasonable publication from the Saturday paper, who were saying

that they had talked to some sources closely placed in, who were saying that the suspicion is that the US, who is very, very suspicious of the Labour Party's ties to China, well they're very pro-China stance, that the US had had effectively directed ASEO to do the leak because they want to damage him. But they did say in the same report, you know, we heard this from a couple of places, but we've been unable to get like any sort of solid confirmation of it. And all of that begs the question, even if, like, regardless of how the information has come to light, does that lesson Dastiar is very obvious guilt in any way?

Give Sam a break. Just, just, just doing his job. I don't know. Steve. I, I disagree because, um, I mean, I think like, like Andrew said, like the stuff he's done in, like, you know, showing like, um, the stuff he's done in like, you know, showing like, um, Pauline Hanson to eat shit and all that sort of stuff, you know, it's all being very very the the the the th....... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. It's just just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. the th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. thi. the the th. the th. th. th eat shit and all that sort of stuff you know it's all being very wonderful but and you know obviously the China stuff's bad I guess but I think his biggest sin was trying to position himself as like a George Taka style meme master on Facebook and for that I think he has to go down.

I won't forgive him for that. No absolutely not. You just know that whole like that that tho that that whole that th th th th th th th th th. th. And th. And tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho that tho that that that that that that that tho tho tho tho that that that tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho that I think he has to go down. I won't forgive him for that. No, absolutely not. You just know that whole like that whole Facebook dank labor memes stash or whatever was his idea. Run by Sam. He makes the memes himself. Yeah, I think he runs ALP spicy memes. I think he's he's definitely a dude who, I don't know, who's just seemed like, he's a way too aware of his actions on camera, you know what I mean? Like he just, he just, he seems like a very, very manufactured in a lab politician type guy for Australia. But yeah, like I said, I don't, I, it's sort of the same way I feel about the Russia stuff,

where I think the Russia stuff in the States, where I think you have to, like, there's no point in falling off the deep end into wild conspiracy theories about unprovable stuff. On the opposite end of that, you would also be an idiot if you thought that like Russia and Russia's government and intelligence agencies and stuff would not exercise some sort of influence or inflict some kind of negative damage on America or there are other ideological opponents if they could get away with it if they could manage it of course they would. By all accounts they're not not

that organized like it's not yeah I'm trying to remember what I was reading that was saying something along the lines of yes of course they would to do that but also they're just kind of in disarray then they're not they're the their their their their their they're their they're their their their they're their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their therying to remember what I was reading that was saying, something along the lines of, yes, of course they would love to do that, but also, they're just kind of in disarray, then they're not, they're not orchestrating all that kind of shit. It's like 9-11, you know? It's not like 9-11, because it was, that was very orchestrated. Confused on what you're saying here. What I mean by it's just like 9-11 is like, yeah, wouldn't it be great if governments were that competent? If they were like as competent as Bush when he hit the towers.

What he did, 9-11, yeah. Yeah, nice. Okay, I'm on the same page. Yeah, all I'll say is this, Bush can fly a plane. He can fly a plane. Hmm. Something to think about. Think about it. Let me just say this.

Mission accomplished. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I don't know what you're saying. Picking up what you're putting down. So yeah, the good thing is about Sam Dassari. There is absolutely no amount of showing that you are completely and utterly compromised that can get you fired anymore in Australian politics. It's good. There's pretty much nothing that can force you to resign from the

person. It's very good and normal. And I should say as well, like personally I don't think that personally, I don't think that like, I don't think that Sam Dastiar who is some secret agent of the Chinese government or anything like that. I think he's just a politician who likes taking money from lobbyists, which is not an exotic breed of person by any stretch of the imagination. Yeah, I just think he's, yeah, he's just a person whose entire career has been influence peddling and power-broking and all that sort of stuff. And when that's your whole life, when someone turns up and goes, hey, I'll give you a fucking $80,000 donation for parroting this shit, you just go, yep, you got it.

Sure. I'd say anything on here for $80,000. Yeah, oh absolutely. I'll say this right now just in case anybody's listening. I think that the South China see belongs to China and everybody else should get out of there, get out of their pool. I agree. I think that's the workers' take to respect China's decision. I think that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's their the workers that's the workers that's the workers is the workers is the workers' the workers I think it's in South China.

President G, if you're listening, you know what we're about, you know what time it is. We like Chinese food. We do. It's great stuff. They also like money. Mostly money. Mmm. If you are looking for a podcast with already a semi-built audience that would, you'd like to make pro-Chinese.

Not saying that it will become, you know, just, you know, there's a certain price at which point, you know. We're not, what, it'd be cheap than Sam Dussiar. Yeah, we're not anti-Chinese and all we're saying is, gives us a little sweetener and maybe you can swing us one way or the other, you know? Yeah. Yeah, open hearts, open minds. Right. It's what it's all about, folks. So, you know, I guess I. The reason for this here.

Hey, Lucy, I hear you're going to have another heat wave in Melbourne. Ah, that's very bad to me because my house is very cheap and I do not have air conditioning. Mm-hmm. Are we really going to have a heat wave? What is this? Wasn't there already a heat wave? It's already hot. 36 on Wednesday. It's already hot. 36 on Wednesday. It's already hot. I don't want another one. This is just every day in Queensland, isn't it? Pretty much. What is that? Isn't this every day in Queensland?

Isn't it just? No, it's beautiful in Queensland today. And as it is every day. Lovely 22 degrees. Whatever. For our American listeners, that will be 97 degrees Fahrenheit. You could just make up any number really. Fahrenheit doesn't make any sense. It's just guessing. It's not a real thing.

No, it's not. It's silly. It's silly. It doesn't make any sense. Like how zero degrees is freezing. It's silly. It's silly. It doesn't make any sense. Like, um, like how zero degrees is freezing. It's the point of freezing, right? Zero degrees Celsius, makes perfect sense to everybody. What is it in Fahrenheit? 32. What the fuck is that? Um, isn't it? Like, their zero is when Mercury freezes? I could be making shit up, but it's something to do with mercury. Which is really useless and stupid and everything they're the the they, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're their, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their, their, their, but it's something to do with Mercury, which is really useless and stupid and everything they do in America is really dumb. It's very silly. Who's even got mercury? You know, who's just got some mercury lying around? Stupid of shit. Ridiculous. You shouldn't even be playing with mercury, it's bad for you.

You shouldn't, you should put it down. Look, I'm going to quickly, I'm going to quickly, just a sidestep here into something we were talking about before we started recording, which is notoriously dumb Twitter account, communism kills. Ashley, right? So, look, yeah, when we're talking about like, right wingers owning themselves online, she's she's the best. Primo, she's an MVP. So right up there. One of the things I think we all enjoyed from her past was when she was talking, as she does,

talks about how, you know, left wing and socialist stuff is really terrible because then everybody else is in charge of everything and takes all your stuff and tells you what to do. And then right after that was complaining about how short her hair was because of how much hair they made her get cut and people were like, who, what do you mean? And she's like, my parents, my parents make me get a hair cut. The parents made me get eight inches cut off my grotesquely long hair. And everyone's like, what the fuck? And she's just like, what's wrong with that? That's normal. It's just totally normal. It's normal stuff. It's very normal to be an adult woman whose parents are in charge of her hair. That's fine. So she, she dropped a, another very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very to th. It th. It th. It th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight th th th th th th th th th th th th th. Eight th. Eight th. Eight to get to get to get eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight eight. Eight. Eight. Eight. Eight. Eight. It's eight. It's to th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. thi. Eight thi. thi. Eight thi. Eight thi. Eight thi. thi. the other day, and they are as follows. I was three in a row, and the third one's a really important one here.

Number one, the quote, we need diversity because of food argument is always lost on me because I actually don't really like ethnic food at all. Already dumb because I don't... Just the words ethnic food. You mean good food? You know she thinks that's like a taco too. Oh yeah. But like I don't even know what the argument is that she's starting with there. We need diversity because of food. Is she solely talking about just people who say that like one of the benefits of having like an ethnically diverse culture is that you get lots of, you get interesting food?

Is that it? She's saying we don't need it. Yeah. Uh, tweet number two, I mostly eat I expect other people to really like it. Okay. All right. Tweet number three. But honestly, I usually eat the same thing five days a week. An omel, an omel, and mac and cheese.

Not really super diverse there. We agree. We completely agree that that's the least diverse sounding range of things to push into your gut that I have ever heard in my goddamn life life Mac and cheese is for children. You just know that she's talking about like the craft box mac and cheese. She's not making the mac and cheese. 100% making making a good one. She's not putting any bacon in there. But as Theo pointed out, you know there's some there's the extremely white, unspicy white people food part of this and there.. the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. There is th. th. th. th. th. their is th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi. thi's thi's thi thi thi's the's the's the's the's th. Mac th. Mac th. Mac thian ch-in's thi-in's thi-n cheese is thi-n cheese is thi-n cheese thi-n. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. Mac. M. M. M. Mcceneene chceneease thi-n's thease thease thease thease thease theauuiauia'c-I's theaseeaseeaseeaseeaseease thease thea's thea's thea's the extremely white, unspicy white people food part of this, and there is also the fact that all those foods she has described are essentially white

in their nature. They're physically white. They're the muse of food. Getting scurvy to own the libs. Oh my, I just, yeah, it's that, there's a whole bunch of material from her in the past that's been like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, yeah, it's that, there's a whole bunch of material from her in the past that's been like along the lines of, you know, yeah, socialism is so terrible because you won't have any... Yeah, I've got that tweet, Andrew, the one with the, so she tweets, this is bad, everything in my apartment is so cold from the heat being out that my blankets are too cold for me to use.

You know how blankets go. To which piss pig granddad logged on from a YPG compound using his very limited mobile time to tweet. to tweet, Ashley, I'm in a communist compound right now. It's warm as hell. We've got stoves in like 50 blankets, you fucking loser. Firstly, does she not understand how a blanket work? Like... Firstly, does she not understand how blankets work? Like, where to stay cold?

Like you put it on your body anything? Yeah, no, the... I don't think she understands how anything works. You know how it goes, the blanket gets cold, and then as you put it on yourself, the blanket stays cold and starts to transfer additional cold most to you. Um, yeah, like it's, it's weird to me how much of, um, um, how, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, the, the, the, the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to, you, to, you to, you to, you to, to, you to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the transfer additional coldness to you. Yeah, like it's weird to me how much of her material is split down the middle between, if we were living in a socialist or communist society, everybody would have all their autonomy taken away. You couldn't live as strong independent adults.

And the other half-first stuff is all like, I don't know how to buy food, I don't know how to get my own hair cut. Oh, I microwaved my chocolate pudding for too long and now it's exploded everywhere. I've ruined my... All of my teeth are falling out because my parents make me brush it with a stick of celery. Yes, it's just really weird. It's very weird to me. But I thought that was too good to resist really talking about because it's very funny to me.

Shout out to Ashley, friend of the show. And look, let me close that out on an observation, which is, I can only begin to imagine what somebody's bowels would be like if they were only eating like omelets, toast, oatmeal, like toast and oatmeal are almost the same thing to start with. The same thing. And mac and cheese. It's the same thing with cheese on it. I'm just, I'm just imagine her doing like these beige ghost shits, you know. She's doing, she doing turds that look like a dog shit that's been left out in the sun for a while in the 70s.

She's dropping white dog poods straight from the bum, straight out. Yeah, they just, they just drop out. Bone, bone dry, completely white. And then right after that, they just get eaten by Lyle Shelton. It's really weird. Now look we we should move on before we run out of time because we have a really important, important segment that we have to get to. Become very close to my heart. Yep. Are you guys, you guys ready for this segment? I'm ready.

I'm ready. Here we go, folks. One. One. One. One. We're Shane One. Where's Shane One.

Where's Shane One. My friend Shane Warren. Shane Warren is over there. Where's Shane Warren? Shane Warren is here. So, we're back. We're back with another installment of, and help me out here, the wide world of Wez warning?

I think so. I think that's the amalgamation of all of the names by this. All the different names we've thought of. The W.W.W. The wide world of W.W.W. That's where we check in every now and then on the status of prolific thirst-like and and cricket legend Shane Warren. Poster of the same photo of himself on Instagram. Right, that is right. I would actually like to take a moment to acknowledge the fact that Shane Warren, powerful social media presence that he is, encouraged people to vote in favor of marriage equality.

So. He did. Good on your warning. You're probably a really bad political person otherwise, but we'll forgive it this time. Oh, yeah, let's not get into that. Let's just assume that he's Shane warned the woke bloke. He's no Bradley. I think it's just based on his favorite porn categories. So yeah, Shane, Shane got on the old tweets the other day on Twitter. That's how we figure out what's going on with Shane. Um, so yeah, the old tweets the other day on Twitter, which is how we figure out what's going on with Shane. And he threw out a couple of tweets that were a

little weird. It had a few people kind of a little bit, a little bit concerned for Shane. They were like, what's what's going on here, Shane? So the first tweet of these two was Shane saying, a quote, I've been single for three years and not dated anyone or been on one date in that time. I'm lucky to have three awesome children who look after me, plus great family and friends too. I'm also grateful to Sky, Star and Channel 9 for the opportunity to work on something I love. Cricket, thank you. People were like, Ronnie, you're all right. This is, well I think a quick bit of, quick bit of reaction to that was, what a strange and not at all suspicious thing to tweet in this time of accusations about, you know,

sexual misconduct. I have not dated anyone for three years. I feel like me and Warnie have a different view of what counts as a date. Because I feel like if I were to bone down with somebody, I would consider that at one date. You would? I would and I don't think, I don't think Mourney. What if you paid for it? You got me there. Well, look, I would and I don't think, I don't think morning. What if you paid for it? You got me there. Well, look, I would agree because back in the days when I was single before I met my wife, it was, you could, did you want to get one in Theo? I know you have a wife too? No, I'm good. Sure. Okay. I could do another one for her if you like just

to make sure everyone's covered. Please do it. And also Theo's my wife. Shout out to Theo's my wife. I don't know what I expected. Yes, I definitely preferred to, I guess at least, I don't know, eat a pizza with somebody before you bone down, as Lucy put it. No, a lot of people. Christ. Well, yeah, you know, be civilized. You can't just start smashing in the club bathroom or whatever. Also, I got out of the game just before Tinder really kicked in.

So, yeah, so totally that one, right over my head. In fact, I don't even know what direction you're supposed to swipe if you do, if you do want to fuck. Yeah. Whenever people say like, oh, I swipe left on that one. I'm like, yeah, that's, is that. Yeah, good for him. I'm like, oh, oh, that's a bad. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. the. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. the. to. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. t. t. t. t. t. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. tot. the. that's yeah good for him like no that's a bad one I think it's left is left is no okay because I got tinder once and all I remember is swiping left repetitively for about 10 minutes before I decided it was not for me yeah wrist started a seize up you know so yeah you know no dates, huh, Warnie. So he followed this up by saying, P.S., I also really appreciate all the support over the years from the public towards me. Well, right back at you, Warnie.

It does mean a lot. Thank you also to Carl and his team at Advanced Hair, who I've been with for 14 years. You guys are the best. And he closes out with just, he really, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he really, he, he really, he really, he th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, th, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to to to to to to to to ten years. You guys are the best. And he closes out with just, he really reads the room here by saying, Time to rip the top off another cold one. Loll. No more tweets. Sounds like a suicide note. I know. They're so weird and like disjointed. Like just changing halfway through, kind of reminds

me of that Britney Spears one that's like, does anyone think global warming is a good thing? I love Lady Gaga. I think she's a really interesting artist. Carl and his team in advance here. Like there's just this box that they just type thoughts in but they don't realize that they have to be like, cogent. Yeah, it's it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's th, it's th, it's th, it's th, it's th, it's th, it's that's very that's very that's very that's very that's very that's very that's very that's very that's that's that's very that's that's that's that that that that that's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's that's thi. thi. that's thi. that's thi. that's thi. that's thi. thi. that's thi. thi. thi. th's just this box that they just type thoughts in, but they don't realize that they have to be like cogent. Yeah, it's very strange. 6,800 likes. Jesus Christ. Very good.

I really liked the reply to that straightaway, which was, I bet you've thrown the leg over a few times though, a warning? Why would he throw his leg over? I'm a true about this scenario. Well, I believe this man is referring, I believe this man Dane, which, um, as Twitter user Ben Hayes replied to me, Dane is Australian for Chad. It really is.

Dane is the Chad of Australia. Yeah, that one is true. So if you're enough from Australia, look out. Look out if you meet a Dane. I believe what Dane is referring to there is that maybe you would consider them a date but maybe Warner considers throwing his leg over some Instagram model who he's been thirstily liking the tweets of maybe he doesn't think that's a that's a date you know so look thoughts and well wishes of the show to Shane Warren, I hope everything's okay.

I hope he, you know, I hope he was just cracking tins and feeling good and just wanted to throw a nice positive shout out into the universe as opposed to, um, was typing what he thought was a suicide note, but it was actually tweets by accident. Hope he's fine. He has of course gone on to tweet for you know another day or two after that so I'm gonna assume he's fine. And I hope he continues because I'm a I'm a big fan of Warnie's Twitter. And I would like to chronicle something here. It's very close to my heart. It's the prolificness. I'm not sure if that's a word, but I'm going to pretend it is. Yeah, okay. Sure. Of the Times, Shane Warren has tweeted about a film character, Stiffler,

or the Stiff-Mister, from master from film series American Pie. What was the character's first name? Steve, I believe, Steve Stiffler. If I'm correct. Good series, good series of movies. Shane Warnes, big fan. Oh, there's another one in that pantheon of films that were sort of arbitrarily retitled for release in Australia. I believe in in America the third one was called like what was it American Pye?

It's a reunion or band camp? The wedding, the wedding one. That's the third one isn't it? Maybe, probably. But yes, I think over there it was called like, you know, American Pie 3 a wedding. And here it's just called American Wedding. Huh. Because we, yeah, you know, we can't figure that up. So, big, Usain he's a big fan of Stiffler? I'm gonna read out a series of tweets and I'm not gonna stop until I'm finished reading them unfortunately. So, it is in fact Steve Stiffler just to...

It is, oh, that's good. That was correct. I'm gonna start. You got your, yeah. I got my Twitter machine up. I'm gonna start at the beginning, which is, what date is this? I must stress stress th stress th stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress stress these these these these these these these these these these these these these these these these these these these thress thress thress thress thress thress thress thress thress, I'm thususususususususus, I'm thi. I'm thiou, I'm thiou, I'm thiou, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm to read, I'm to read, I'm to read, I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm going thi. I'm going thi. I'm going to to to thi. I'm going to to to thi. I'm going to to to to to toooooom. I'm going to at the beginning, which is, what date is this? I must stress, these are over many, many years. Um, September, 2011. Just finished watching American Pie with my two elders kids. Some awkward moments, but very funny. Love Stiffler. He's a classic. He's a classic. March 2012.

American Pie reunion, a winner. Love, Stiffler. We're on to 2015 here, June. Stifler equals legend. Oh, sorry, I skipped ahead. We got one from April. Oh, no, it's 2016. I'm gonna skip around a little.

I know I've said this before, but I love, in quotes, Stiffler, the in quotes, Stiffmeister is such a tool, but so good, ha ha ha. More 2016 at 5.12 a.m. Stiffler could possibly be my favorite movie character of all time. He is such a dick but makes you laugh every time. Hashtag American Pie. Are there more? Hold on, hold on. I want these all on the record.

2015. Seriously, how good is Stiffler in the American Pie movies? He just cracks me up, such a knob, but you can't not laugh. One more, 2015, Stifler, legend, that is all. Hashtag American Pie. There is one really, really clear picture that this paints to me. And that is that, uh, that is that, uh, uh, that, uh, that is that, that, that is that, that, that, that is that, that, that is that, that, that is that is that, that is that, that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is really clear picture that this paints to me, and that is that Shane Warren owns exactly one box set of DVDs. It's just American Pie. It's just the American Pie collection. There was one tweet, I think it's in like 2014 of him going to one of the premieres of like American Pie reunion or something and he's like going to the premier and

Maybe he got paid a lot of money or something I Can't guarantee you that he called Sean William Scott stifler when he saw him. Oh absolutely. He doesn't know the name of the actor and he doesn't care to know. That man is stifler to him and always will be. There was another one. About to watch American Pie with six excited children. Probably shouldn't do that. That's pretty inappropriate.

Why are you watching what? Why are you watching? What was your favorite line or scene from the movie? I reckon I can guess yours, Shane. Why are you sitting down with six kids to watch movies about drinking come, fucking pies and banging your friends' mothers? I think he just wants to be Stiffler. That's why that is what Stiffler would do, he would show a movie like that to a bunch of kids. That's fair.

He would. And I think Shane Fanty's himself is a bit of a stiff-meister. Well, he's got that spiky blonde hair, doesn't he? A bit of a knob, but you can't help but love him. Oh, it's absolutely, the classic classic stuffic stuff, that classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic classic stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff stuff, that is just solid, like that is such solidly established canon over years. That several years. That famous spin bowler, Shane Warn, absolutely fucking loves American Pie and most specifically the character Steve Stiffler.

And apparently it has not like worn out for him at all. No, it's a news thought every time it comes into his head. It's like it's a brand new idea. Like I remember watching those movies like when they were actually coming out, you know, as a teen and that kind of thing. However, fucking old they are, geez. Well, I remember, I remember seeing Shannon Elizabeth Topless in the first one and it being very interesting to me, so, so I was probably pretty young. Um, but I'm, I'm no longer interested in naked women who are not my wife. Congrats to your wife. So on that note, congratulations Shane Warren on just really your solid, solid love of a series of middling films. That came out a long time before you started tweeting about them.

I don't know, he just keeps going back over and over. Love the Sifmister. Oh, dear. Can I just say, while you guys have been talking about Shane Warren and Stiffler, I noticed that he has 11.8000 likes on Twitter. So I thought I'd have a little dive. Uh-oh. So like 50% of them are like cricket-related stuff.

25% are like him liking people where he, where they've said that he's a legend. The remaining 25% are likes of just about every single post that all of the lingerie models that he follows. In the three years, not on one date. And also Nikki Whalen from neighbors. So there's one of just a lady, Unch J. Utgard, I don't know who she is, but she's a model, they're just in her lingerie with a link to my private Instagram feed here. This is given that the good old, the Shane Warren seal of approval.

I would be very surprised if he found out that people could see what he likes. I feel like he wouldn't know that. He would have a little dive. People likes to check in every now and little dive from his tablets. People like to check in every now and then on his Instagram likes as well, which I would say compared to his Twitter likes, which as you said are mixed between liking cricket stuff and compliments about himself. I think the Instagram stuff is much more purely horny.

And it also betrays like, you know, a nice, a very nice kind of middle-aged dad use of the internet to kind of go, ooh, there's a sexy lady in a bikini. Like, not like any other normal man dividing his... The mildest form of nudity available on it. Like, yeah, any other regular human just divides their internet time between like the normal things that you look at and like and everything, and then the filth you look at when you're in your, when you... Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, because no one needs to see those likes, you know what I'm saying? They really don't. They really don't. They don't. I bet he has a porn hub account and he makes comments. Love this, lull. He just makes comments about American Pie character. He just comments on these porn videos.

Nice, but have you seen American Pie Reunion? Love Stiffler. That's a tool but it isn't to laugh every time. It would just be him commenting on porn videos going, oh, imagine what Stiffler would do. Oh, shame. All right, folks, we're going to wrap it up. Do either of you have anything else that you desperately need to add to this? No, I've got it all out.

Oh, yeah. Australian bird of the year is the Australian magpie, which just goes to the democracy is dead. Are you serious? They're fucking violent birds from hell. Well, this is the nature kind. That is a lie. And number two, the white ibis, which is just diarrhea poured into a white feathery frame. Oh that was your little taste of Nature Corner folks. I think that we should actually revisit this topic and find out which animals we all love and loathe the most.

Fuck magpies, I'll just say that. I love magpies, I love their nice little songs. They're little doodily songs. I'm all about it. Oh yeah, they've got a lot going for them. They just fuck it all up by picking eyeballs out. I'm down. I've got my, maybe got a small head. Maybe go to a tiny, weird head.

If anything, my head is too big, but that's a topic for another. Maybe it's gettie ahead then. Fly towards it and go whoa. It's too big for me. Back out of the last minute. All right folks. It is time for us to go and we will see you next week or on Patreon. Hitchit Lyle. Echit Lyle. Oh.