Boonta Vista - EPISODE 293: I Got Fingered Near The Hole

Episode Date: April 20, 2023

Theo, Andrew, and Ben bring you: The death of the Maine Lobster Festival Sea Goddess, an expanding hole in Iowa, a check-in on the Live fandom, and Dutch bike helmet controversy. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Welcome to come back. Welcome to Buonto Vista episode 293. I'm Theo, and I'm here in a second even more disgusting part of the Turd Factory. No, I don't, I don't think that you are. Hey? No, I... What? I believe it? I believe it. No, I don't think we have to be back in the Tird factory. I don't think you have to explore further parts that you that you that you that you that you the parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts parts that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you the parts that you that you that you that you tha tha tha tha th of tha that you that you th of th of th of tha tha thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you th th th th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the theurd factory. I don't think you have to explore further parts of the tuad factory. I think we We covered all of the ground of the turd factory in the last turd factory intro. It's playbrall. It doesn't sound like we covered it all of the areas in the turd factory athink that's necessary. Is it one of the sub-basement levels or... There are no other parts. We explored all of the areas in the Tird Factory last time. We covered every possible bit of comedic ground that there could be in the Turd Factory, I think.

All right, fine. All right. I'm Mike Whitney and this is Gladiators, for those of you just joining us. There has, of course, been some form of clerical of the cl cl cl cl cl cl cl cl cl of the the the the the th of th of the th of th of the th of the th of th of the There has of course been some form of clerical error on this episode. Now contestants are for some reason battling against the female gladiators tonight. I'm here with Andrew. Andrew you come away from all four events with zero points. Really seems like your mental state is in kind of total collapse out there as you bounce between agony and ecstasy with each new blow delivered by our gladiators. How would you describe your performance so far? I would actually say that I am at complete peace with myself right now. I am achieving a state of total serenity as each large sweaty foot tramples down upon me. Uh-huh. You know, you're like you've got to suffer to reach enlightenment for a start.

Yeah, finding that inner strength, upon me. Uh-huh. You know, you've got to suffer to reach enlightenment for a start. Yeah. Yeah, finding that inner strength, just digging in those reserves. That's what gladiators is all about. I'm Mike Whitney. And at the end of that round, it's, so Delta had your head to their head tooe and she was like, that's like your head was going to pop, sort of one eye was sort of on the way out of its socket. I know, but just screaming, do it. Disappointingly.

Yeah, what do you think went wrong? It's like like raw shark at the end of Watchman. Just. Do it! Yeah, well, Captain Millennium or whatever. Yeah, the ref looked really uncomfortable. The ref did not know which way to go, who to disqualify, you know? So funny thing, okay, this is a fucking Berenstain Bears moment.

Mike Whitney did not host Australia gladiators. He hosted Who Dares wins? I don't think this is a Berenstain simple moment at all that I never thought that Mike Whitney hosted Gladiators. What? No, I was riding this and Caitlin's like, are you Michael Whitney? And I'm like, yes, did you know he didn't actually host that? He was just the referee.

Huh. Yeah, yeah. Hold on. Just the referee, right, so he wasn't. Yeah, he was just the referee. But anyway, we're gonna just keep, we're just gonna push on. We're here with the fan favorite tonight as well. Ben, da Baby MacLea.

Ben, people love your catchphrases like, I'm the baby, and where's my mummy? Yeah. It's still no points either though. How are you feeling out there? I'm very scareward. And I'm so vulnerable. Oh, anyone could trample me at any time. I'm an adult baby in Australian gladiators. And everyone's been wondering whether you'd keep your outfit on the whole way as well, which is a little sailors outfit with a big lollipop, but you have. What's your thinking behind that? What's your what's your strategy? Well obviously most people would associate the sailors outfit the lollipop with someone that is of at least toddler age

which is confusing given that I am de baby. Yeah. But I really wanted to convey that not only am I weak and vulnerable I'm also a little bit fancy. Yeah. And you're old enough to understand what's going on out their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the sa. the sa. the sa. the sa. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. I. I. So. I. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, t. So. So, t. So. So, t. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. Yeah. And you're old enough to understand what's going on out there as well. Yeah, to comprement while I'm getting my melon squished. Yeah, I think the important thing, you want the costume to give off the understanding that you are not street smart. Like you have not scrabbled your way up from the gutter. You know what I find interesting about all this? Yeah. Is that so in the the television program Australian Gladiators, no one was ever introduced by their full name. There was just the nickname that they were given, Vulcan, and they're all the rest. Yeah. But also in these intros we never really

introduce each other by our full names either. No. We just generally just say a first name because that's enough to identify us. What are we going to say? I'm you know Theo and all the rest a podcaster. Yeah you don't want to do that. He's my email address. But you've chosen instead of just going, it's the baby, it's Ben, it's Ben, you did say specifically Ben de Baby McLean as if you wanted to even more associate it. That's your stage name. Yeah. Oh I'd argue that I'd argue that in the scenario I'd argue that search metrics gone as well. In this scenario Theo is Mike Whitney. I'm who am I? I'm just me right? Yeah, you're you. You're Andrew Moore. I'm I'm Andrew Moore being stepped on by some large ladies and you are Ben McLeigh entering

Australian Gladiators in the 90s. And when they say do you have a nickname? He's like I got one geared up popping it on the form right now. I'm the baby. Yeah, but I'm also me and make sure you put my full name down. So I am me in this scenario. Yes, but I don't know if we want like do we want to get into the specifics of whether or not you are your current age in the 90s or that you are the age that you would have been in the 90s? Well what year is this airing? 907? I'm going to go with? I would have been seven years old. Yeah. Not old enough to play Deuxuxx yet. Not old enough to get your head kicked in on Australian gladiators.

I've got to be ten to that. Probably. I haven't played any of those, but I sure picked up the boxes when I was at Harvey Norman. And I looked at those those those those those those those tho I tho I tho I tho I tho I tho I sure picked up the boxes when I was at Harvey Norman and I looked at those and I thought wow total anah and uh... total this looks cool whatever this is. Nothing like the nothing like the bargain PC game crate at Harvey Norman. Villanous Australian retailer Harvey Norman.

Yeah. Kids these days wouldn't understand flipping through a bargain bin where you get a red ant branded classic games PC game for 995. Elder Scrolls 3, Morrow Wind, Red Ant edition. They wouldn't understand that. Pick up a Gravis game pad to play that on? These days it's all... These days it's all I'll simply download it on Steam. How about that? Yeah, oh it's a Steam sale. You sound insane. You guys realize that you're paying money and you don't even get a CD that can be ruined, stopping you from

playing the game. Yeah. You're missing out. I'm Mike Whitney. Yeah. I think you're Mike Whitney. You start saying that's people. You're mean to ask.

You're Mike Whitney? Also, was Who Des Wins originally an American program or was there an American version of Who Daes Wins? It is an Australian Adventure Game Show. Oh man, because it's I just, it's such a specific time capsule of Australianness that I really feel like if you were try to give someone a primer on what Australia is, Mike Whitney going to like a Westfield somewhere. He's at Westfield Hornsby and he's talking to a guy named Brody, who's 22. He's an apprentice boiler maker and he's at the mall shopping for Nintendo 64 games. And Mike Whitney comes up to, he says, oh, yeah, mate, you look like you're a bit of a good sport.

Oh, look, I've got $ um, I got $20 here. Will you put your hand in this box for $20? There's a scorpion in there, mate. Oh, no, no, I wouldn't, I wouldn't dare. No, you would. Go on. You got it. I see you've got a lady with you there.

Uh, I think she'd be pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty impressed. impressed if you put your hand in the box with a scorpion mate $20 that'll buy you seven beers because of the show them that and then the full frontal version of who dares wins and I think you've probably got Australian culture kind of all scooped up in a little bucket yeah it's perfect so I'm just thinking about who dares wins and it's fantastic low stakes compared to a lot of other TV shows. Literally, it's like a guy pulling one note out of his wallet. It's so cool. All right, so if you are not Australian, if you're listening to the show, it's possible

that you're from another country. Congratulations. It's actually likely. It's more likely than not. Or you were born in 2001. That's fucked up, that go right. Yeah, awful. So the main focus of each episode of Who Dares Wins revolves around a dangerous stun of some kind, an unsuspecting contestant previously nominated by a viewer of the show, oh you're in trouble, is ambushed by Whitney and dare to partake and complete the stunt successfully to win a major consolation prize. Major consolation prize? Huh?

If you die, your family gets a big payout. It's usually, the prize is usually a holiday and spending money, all right? You're going for three days and nights on the fabulous Gold Coast. Yeah. Surf is paradise. Yeah. Can you believe it? Most of the runtime of a typical episode is devoted to the preparation of the stunt and training the consistent receives. Often the stunt would also be demonstrated beforehand, successfully or unsuccessfully by a professional stuntman. In the climax of the show, all right, you guys to help me out with this because I'm I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the. the. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. thi. the thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the th. te. te. te. te. tea. tea. tea. tea. teauuuu. teau. teau. teau. teau. tea. tea. tea. te. t climax of the show, all right, you guys got to help me out with this because I'm, I don't, I don't think I agree with the format they're going with here.

In the climax of the show, the contestant then attempts to complete the dare, if successful, they win the major prize, if they fail or they decide to drop out, co-host Tanya Zayeta will then then the dare, then then then then then the the the the the the the thanter thane th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is the the to complete the dare instead. Right? You're with me so far? All right, yeah. If she succeeds in the dare, the contestant forfeits the prize. If she fails or declines to do the stunt, the contestant then wins the prize. I think you should be out of winning the prize once you say I'm not going to do the stunt. No, no, I can't. Nah, no, it's not for me. No, I'm sorry though, no, I can't. Yeah. Then you don't get shit, Brody. Don't deserve anything, Brody. Then what's Tanya's job? Yeah, so Tanya hangs out and then she just has a crack at it if you decide you're not into it that day. Yeah. During the show, each major dare is bookended by several minor segments in which Whitney travels the streets and shopping malls of Australia,

challenging people to complete a lesser dare for a cash prize, usually around $50 to $200. It's so good. Hi, mate, we've set up a trampoline on the bottom floor, if you'll jump jump off the third floor down onto that trampoline, I'm gonna give you a pineapple and a lobster, that's right, 70 bucks could be yours. I'll buy you a 23-inch television. Because it is 1996. And the show's name was taken from the SAS's. Is it true? Yeah, I think so, right.

Fuck. This may range, the dares may range from sticking a hand into a container full of cockroaches or having all their hair shaved off, to more complex dares, such as tightrope walking above a mall foyer, or diving off a 10 meter platform into a pool. How do you do that in a mall? All right, you gonna do the dare for 50 bucks? Get in this car. We're gonna take you to this Olympic diving platform.

We're going to the Werribee Aquarabi. Hudez wins screened in over 50 countries around the world. It continues to be popular on cable television networks such as AXN. In particular, it shows massive success in India, even led to a series of India-based specials hosted by Whitney and Zayeta in 2002. And later, an Indian spin-off called Extreme Damaka in 2003. I fucking love this. Mike Whitney being like, hey mate. Here you go, here's a

thousand rupee if you jump off the Jan Tar Mantar directly to this pool. Good on ya. All right, just as a little coda to this, uh, I want to introduce you to the Maxibon Challenge. Yeah. At the height of the show's popularity, Mike Whitney introduced the Maxibon Challenge, a minor segment challenge to eat a Nestle Maxibon ice cream in 30 seconds. I don't think I can do it. Whitney would test the medal of the Australian public. It's like nothing. It's like nothing. I think the the show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show the show. Yeah. Yeah. the show. the show. the show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I the. of the Australian public. It's like four bites.

Yeah, if it could test it, I see you reckon you could do it, hey? Easily. You're up to it, mate. No way. Oh, 50 bucks. Because if you win, you get 50 bucks and you get dubbed a Whitney warrior. You get dubbed a Whitney warrior. Fuck.

That's so good. I mean, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot, thi, tha, thi, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, thi, thi, that, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. I. I. I. I. I, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like, to. It's like, ta. It's like, ta. It's like. ta. It's like. ta. ta. ta. te. te. te. to. I'm. It's like, you. now that the way the Whitney Warriors behaved in Afghanistan was not. A lot of suggestions. Sorry, I was just immediately imagining him giving me that title and then going like straight to a military supply place and buying a uniform. Just starting valet stealing immediately. What if you're from a country where you don't have the Maxibon? What is tragedy?

Yeah. Yeah. Do we need to describe the MaxiBon for the uninitiated? Oh, I thought that was you segue into the regional bullshit theme. Oh, I forgot we were doing a podcast. Yeah. This is just how guys talk. Have we been recording this whole time?? Oh? Oh? Oh? Oh? Oh? Oh? Oh? Oh? Oh? th. Oh? th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, we're thi, thi, thi, thi, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. What, th. We th. We th. We th. We th. We're, th. We're, th. We're, th. We're, th. We're, th. We're th. We're th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, the. What, thi. What, thi. What, how guys talk when they're hagging out. Oh, have we been recording this whole time? Oh, I'm sorry, we're just friends. You know who our fourth friend is? You. It's you. The listener. And our fifth is Lucy. Yeah. She's sort

of like the Neil Innes of this episode of Buntavista. He was the guy that's like... who it is either. I don't know who it is either. th is, oh, oh, oh, th is, oh, th is, oh, th is, oh, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, oh, th, oh, th, oh, oh, th, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I th. I thi, I thi, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm th, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm th. Oh, I'm th,avista. He was the guy that's like... I don't know who it is either. Neal Inus is usually the Neil Innis of Monty Python but he was like the sixth, the seventh member after Carol Cleveland. Yeah. After like all the ones you remember. So after... There's the five English ones, there's the one American one, there's Carol Cleveland, then there's Nealiness. Okay. Just looking at this guy and like now I'm having a Berenstain Bears moment where I'm just like they've put this guy into all these old photos of Monty. Shopped him into the background as a group bag.

Yeah I know all that Eric Idol, yep he's there, Terry Gilliam's there and who the fuck? Is that guy? Thought I'd watched a lot of that show. Geez. He's in uh, in Monty Python the Holy Grail, he's the minstrel, he's the minstrel that is following Sir Robin around and singing the songs about Robin did boldly run away and so on. And if you want to find out more about Montephyth of the Holy Grail, ask anyone you know that plays a lot of Dungeons and Dragons to recite some of the gags for you. I'll be able to help you out. Yep, the Max of On Ice Creamed Sandwich, a treat that is available only in some regions.

It's time for regional bullshit. Regional bullshit. Every little town has got their own bullshit. Regional bullshit. Every little town has just got to have it. Sorry Ben you pointed out the Segway I wasn't just going to let it go to waste. Thank you. I appreciate that. We use every Segway here. Snout to Tail. Yeah, absolutely. Making Segway stock with all the leftover bits.

From WMTW, the woman's were. Women mowing their own way. That's what that stands for. Surprising new movement. In Maine, no more sea goddess. Oh, Maine Lobster Fest event goes gender neutral. Yeah. Now I'm on the sea goddess. The diet. That's pretty sexy. Yeah. Yeah. The main lobster festival. Oh, what about the lesser ones? Yeah. Yeah. The main lobster festival. Oh, what about the lesser works, huh? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, the main lobster festival, oh what about the lesser ones, huh?

The main lobster festival has announced a change to its coronation event. Historically known as the sea goddess coronation, the event will now be opening up participation to anyone ages 16 to 22. Organizers say the new title for the representative will be Main Lobster Festival Delegate. That fucking sucks. That's yeah. They really like, like I'm on board with what's happening. I'm glad they opened it up. Finally, totally on board. I can say this for as long as I've known about the main lobster fest C goddess, I've been arguing, hey, what about our guys? What about our non-binary friends? Sea deity? Done. I just, yeah, I think just because you're taking the word goddess out, just because you're going gender neutral doesn't mean you have to take away all the glamour, you know?

It's clearly a night about glamour. When have you ever heard the word delegate? I mean like, ooh, oh he's a, they're a delegate? Well, I didn't, I didn't realize. That delegate had the most beautiful hair I'd ever seen. Literally the first time that sentence has ever been uttered. I'm very excited for the swimsuit portion of the delegate coronation. Did you hear that Craig has been seeing a delegate? I just feel like he's punching a little bit above his weight. Organizers say that the new title will be that sucky one

and that applicants can include anyone, quote, who is passionate about being an advocate for mains lobster industry regardless of gender. Huh. Yeah. What are they roles? What are their responsibilities? What are they duties?

Yeah. What do they have to do to advocate for mains lobster industry? Well, what if, what if it turns out that it's just like a 21-year-old fisherman? You know? And he's in his, he's in his waiters and his, he's got his beanie on. And he says, boy, I sure do love working on the fishing boat, catching lobsters for you, fine folk. Yeah. That's, that's, that's fitting the role, right? Yeah. Wow. We're going to have to follow up on this one to find out. Oh, who gets crowned?

Yeah, I absolutely want to know how this turns out. Do they have a, does a delegates still get a crown? Do they just get like a handshake and a briefcase? Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's not getting coronated anymore. Oh, that's that's an interesting. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thin, thine. thine. thine. thine. thine. thine. thine. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thine. thine. thine. thine. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thine. thine. thin. to to to to to to to to to anymore. Oh, that's an interesting point. I'm fearing that they're not going to get a sash at all. Yeah. Just one of those little triangular like desk title things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They put in front of themselves in the UN. It says their name and the buck stops here. Yeah, that's it. Now Theo, they just give you the strip with your the name with with with with with with with with with with the name the name the name the name with with with with the name the name the name the name the name the name with the name the name their their their their their their name their their name their the buck stops here. That's it. Now Theo, they just give you the strip with your name embossed on it, and they're like, you have to provide your own holder to slot it into. We're not made of money. Festival directors surveyed the local community and students,

and the feedback showed overwhelming support for updating and expanding the tradition to allow more young people to participate. They are also increasing the prize money. Savvy young people. The thing we like is all being able to have a go and money. Give give me money. The event will also include updates on the quote, on the hashtag Save Maine Lobsterman campaign. Lubsdeman is innocent. We will not rest until lobster man's conviction is overturned and he is released. There was a story that I didn't end up including in the notes for whatever reason from a couple of weeks ago that was about like Maine's oldest lobster man but who is a like a 90-something year old

woman just a what it's going on what are you what the fuck are you talking about a lobstermen is a lobster fisherman oh yeah a lobster man yeah lobster person yeah lobster person yeah lobser men yeah an elderman. Yeah. Really ripe for a parody of the Primus song John the Fisherman, John the Lobsterman. And all the lyrics are more sort of lobster focused. If you are, you listen to this and you want to get the karaoke version of John the Fisherman by Primus and then do a lobster style parody over the top. Please send that into a mailbag at Buntavista.com. If you are under 30, Primus is a band. Primus is maybe the worst band you'll ever hear and they also rule extremely hard.

They're actually the only band who have their own ID3 genre tag and it's just Primus. Because they're like their own thing. Sort of the bassist is sort of like the lead? Yeah. That's crazy. Is that legal? Yeah, because instead of just being like, boom, but their tum bodeum, he's sort of like,

but their barbred-dum, rejected him because he was too talented. Can you imagine? That's what the story is. Can you imagine? They should give him to play for the bars of Volta. Oh my god, imagine if Les Claypool played in Toole. Yeah, I mean Toll already have a pretty good bassist. This has been the 30-something year old man hour. Yeah, if you'd like to learn more... This is actually a segment that's coming up shortly. Lucy would never let this happen. No. She would bully us all until we stopped.

Yeah. Anyway, if you'd like to learn more about Redneck Bootsie Collins, Yeah. Go to your MP3 library and sort by Primus. It's the only band with its own ID3 genre tag. That was true 15 years ago. Haven't really looked into ID3 tags since then. They're probably going strong.

All the contestants will share their ideas on how they can support the main lobster festival and the lobster industry. Get fucking Les Claypool down here. Oh my god, he loves fishing. He loves fishing. Does he have a TV show? A fishing TV show? Yeah, yeah, no, I'm, I knew this was a fucking real thing that Les Claypool and Dean Ween from Ween co-hosted a fishing show.

God damn, that's too really... Now if you're under 30, we imbues. Yeah, this is sort of kind of the go-fuck yourself episode. Oh. We kind of like unironically rules though. Oh, you kind of sucks more than anything. They're not in a way that rules either. No, sorry, you're wrong about that one, bro.

This is a surprise. They're kind of like the, uh, the Beatles of being kind of weird. Oh, god damn. Yeah, Beatles of Getting High. I reckon they're odd when they're writing those songs. Oh, shut up. The drug that makes you bad at writing music. The first main lobster festival delegate

will be chosen on the opening night of the festival on August 2nd, 2023, along with a Miss mr. congeniality well that's you've fucked up haven't you yeah I'm done it all irrespective yeah yeah you've just made it a binary thing now so anyone can be the delegate but only men and women can be miss or mr. congeniality when's enby congeniality? Wens ennb congeniality? Wens enb-congeniality? Weniality? Wheniality? Wheniality? Wheniality? Wheniality? Wheniality? Wheniality? W W W W W W W, the the the thiality? W, thiality? W, thiality? Well, thiality? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, that? Well, thiality? Well, thi, thi, thi, well? Well, well? Well, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, the the the the the the the the the thi, the thi, thi, the thi, the the the the the the the the their, their, the the delegate, but only men and women can be miss or miss to congeniality. When's Enby congeniality? Hmm? They, them, congeniality. Yeah. Yeah. Apologies, I've only read that. I don't think anyone's ever had to say it out loud. We're the first people to do that. Yeah, so brave. The winner will receive a cash prize of $2,000.

The runner-up will receive $1,000 and the congeniality person will receive $500. All participants will receive a $100 donation to be given to the local non-profit of their choice. Oh, that's nice. What about the congenialist con Yeah, yeah. Like the mentalist? Yeah, or like the Ian Banks novel, The Algebraist. Yeah, I was gonna say, sounds like a Warren Zvon album, yeah. The congenialist. I bet you're thinking to yourself, boy, this podcast has really found itself in a hole. And you'd be right. It's time you want the thanks are the thanks was falling, you're falling. Are you ready to get your whole looked into?

Space suit design for NASA. Who? The guy that did that theme for us. Yeah That's true We are we are constantly having to deal with this Fuck what was the one that got us the dichotomy? Anytime we say oh, well I doubt you're a surgeon, but if you are, can you answer this question someone immediately? Oh, that was the the person that has done a bunch of papers on racial discrimination and facial recognition algorithms. She's like, damn, you're too smart to be listening to this podcast.

Check out any of those BBC pop science podcast. That's probably more your speed. It's probably more your speed. Yeah, I already know. It's probably more your speed. Yeah, I don't mean that in the insulting way. I mean that in the where the low gear. You gotta get up into the upper. This is sort of the remedial class. Yeah, but maybe for some people though, this is there watching the wrestling,

you know. Maybe this is there I just kind of get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to to to to to to to get to get to to to to get to get to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the. the. theat. the the the the the the the they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the I just kind of get to turn my turn my brain off from now. There's actually a pretty complex meta narrative happening with wrestling the rewards. You guys see Vince McMahon's moustache? No. No. He's back, baby, and he's got a little pencil mouser. He shouldn't be. Oh, he was gone because of all of the, all of the hush money for all of the sexual stuff. Oh, Vince McMahon, notoriously bad guy for decades. Not a good guy.

Not a good person. Yep, and it's been that way for as long as any of us can remember. This comes to us from KCCI. The Koochee. The Koochee in Des Moines, Iowa, must see. A large sinkhole in Iowa has grown. Oh, you got a lot going on down there? Hole's getting bigger.

This is the tourism pitch for Des Moines, Iowa, our sinkhole has got a bit bigger. I dare you... Bigger than yesterday, tomorrow is going to be bigger bigger again Name a single thing about Iowa without mentioning the band slip not Yeah, what's in Iowa like what's a traditional Iowan thing? What's a notable? Corn or is it? I'm thinking of corn. I think I was the the cor. I was the one in the wrong spot or in the right spot? I was the one in the right spot? Oh, the the thing? I? I thing. I thing? I thing. I thing? I thing? I thing. I the thing? I the thing. I the thing? I thing. I the things? I the things. I things. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the things. I things. I'm things. I'm the things. I'm the the the the the things. I'm things. I'm things. I'm things. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I thing. I the the the the the the the the the things. I the the things. I things. I things. I things. I'm in the the the the the things. I'm in the the the the the the the the the things. I'm the the the the things. I'm the things. I'm the things. I thing. What's a notable... Corn? Is it a corn? I'm thinking of corn? I think Iowa has corn, but it's not like the... I was the one in the wrong spot or in the right spot. No, the one that you believe is in the wrong state, is in the wrong spot, is you think Ohio is in the wrong spot. Ohio. Yeah. And that's what we're talking about Iowa, which is also Idaho. Idaho has famous potatoes. That's the thing that's on there in other plates. Iowa hasn't got shit.

Yeah, it's got a town called Des Moines. I've been to Iowa. I don't remember any of it. I have no memories of Iowa. Well, uh, just so that you know, Iowa is in fact the leading corn producing state in the United States. Yeah, okay, then why is the world's only corn palace in Mitchell South Dakota? They're trying to steal some of Iowa's Thunder clearly. They know they can't compete with them on production and quality of corn.

And of course, according to this Corn F-A-Qs page from Iowa Corn. that's the podcast, this is so good. I was really worried we'll got to write out of stories this episode. I guess I was wrong. I thought the intro was going to go for 30 seconds. It went for 17 minutes. Here's a question, by the way. Here's a question that we're all frequently asking about Iowa's corn.

Why is corn Iowa's leading crop? Yeah, probably because they plant so much of it. Yeah. Because the US government subsidizes it. Yeah. Corn is a great sentence for somebody who have written down. Corn has been the top crop in Iowa for more than 150 years running. And that's not because Iowa farmers just can't think of anything better to grow. Oh, come on. Now you're just inviting the question, aren't you?

It's because Iowa is the best place on the planet to grow corn. That is a bold statement. What about the places where corn originated? Like Central America? They were doing it wrong the whole time. Where's corn indigenous too? I think it's Iowa. Yeah, it's probably Iowa. So, so they're doing about two and a half billion bushels of corn on 12. th. thi thiiii thoe thin, thi, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, thin, thin, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho tho tho tho the the tho the the the the tooo the the to toda today tho today today today, tho to to to to to Iowa. So they're doing about two and a half billion bushels of corn on 12.9 million acres of land. You do the math. Because we wouldn't even know where to start. Mexico, corn is indigenous to Mexico. Anyway, I believe I have sufficiently answered the question, what do you think of when you

think of Iowa? It's corn, but we could be thinking of something else soon. A big hole. A county official. A county official. A tall where the corn used to be. A lot of corn around here. The county official, the man that the government set out with a badge, very sweaty rumpled shirt, tie knot, a bit too loose, kind of a Rodney Dangerfield

vibe. Driving a Ford Laser. A 1998 Ford Laser. The county official said the sinkhole is now 40 feet wide and 10 feet larger than it was last week, he said, giving a thumbs up for some reason. Yeah. Like they're bragging, you know? and 10 feet larger than it was last week, he said, giving a thumbs up for some reason. Like they're bragging, you know? Most people think it's bad to have a big hole appear and get bigger, right?

Do they want it to be all of Iowa? What if they lose their precious corn growing area? Yeah, big hole though. Oh, people coming from miles around to look at it, you know. County officials there didn't know how it started, or if it would spread. As in the hole get bigger or as in more holes start popping up. Yeah, the whole problem they're talking about, the whole phenomenon. Yeah, yeah. Later this week, the Iowa Geological Society will be there to study it. What the fuck else do they have going on?

Corn. They're too busy? Yeah. Sorry, we can't come and look at the steadily growing, mysterious sighole. We have other rocks to look at. I'm really, like, is anybody else picturing just, like, farm surrounding it and people sitting on the back porch in their rocking chair looking at the hole Saying looks bigger and yesterday I reckon I were aced yeah it looks bigger than yesterday isn't this what that fucking

that show that just came out in last two years about the one with Josh Brolin the one with Josh Brolin isn't that exactly what the plot of that is how I watched it it's not tremors it's called like the range or something out of range out of range the weird spooky range they should make a show kick off Iowa tourism with a docudrama about this hole called The Spooky Iowan Hole. The Hull that got bigger. No, I don't think you want to market it as spooky, right?

I think that's a mistake. You don't want to market the hole. Well, if you market the hole is spooky, then you're only going to get Goths coming to look at it, and that's a niche market. True. And you're going to get, you're going to get Goths who want to fuck near it. Yeah. And like maybe Goths doing an only fans video near it. And that's not going to be enough to sustain or to replace the income from the corn if the whole thing's getting better. You can only make $10,000 in I got fingered near the whole shirts. I reckon. Oh that's pretty good actually. I reckon you market it as being like... You market it as being like Iowa's Grand Canyon except if you show up and pay five bucks, the whole family can throw in as much shit as they want.

Is the whole family the family that lives closest to the hole? Who gains sovereignty over the hole? I guess if the whole is the devil's dominion. I think Iowa owns it until the hole gets big enough to like cross a border. I would say by definition the hole is not part of Iowa because it's a hole in Iowa. And who owns everything outside of Iowa? The Illuminati. So I was going to say that Iowa already have a film or TV or whatever, children of the corn. That's actually set in somewhere else, Nebraska.

But it was filmed in Iowa. Yeah, the thing is, there's like, um, it didn't get them coming, but I got them going. Fourteen states in America that like only grow corn. Yeah. So like a lot of them are kind of the corn state. Yeah. And because of the high fructose corn syrup. And because of how delicious popcorn is. Although that's a different species of corn.

Oh, fuck. Yeah. I really like this. This question on the corn. Is all the corn grown in Iowa sweet corn? Answer, you wish. P. P. What?

Why? Who would wish that? God, I hope they have a monoculture. You wish, but no, some of it sucks. Some of it is just for biodiesel. Less than 1% or only about 3,400 acres of sweet corn is grown in Iowa each year. Most of the corn you see growing in Iowa's field corn, which is used to make fuel, feed, food, and thousands of other dog shit products.

Holy fuck America sucks ass. Thank you for the national parks and for the good beers. And all that goddamn that the rest of your shit sucks so bad Are you tired of paying nothing for the same old superior quality free episodes of the Buntavista podcast do you want less politics and more content about diarrhea our animals gone wild you're tired as skipping through those hours upon hours of paid product placement for Mark Wahlberg's shooter. Well, boy, do I have the offer of a lifetime for you.

That's right, for just five US dollars a month. You too can be a premium VIP member of the Buntavista Patreon. That's right, just five US dollars for all of our bonus episodes. That's over 300 hours of content from the hosts you know. tooo. too. too. to. to. too. to. too. too. too. too. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm, too. I'm, too. I'm, too, to, to, too, too, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theau.eaugh, thi.e, th hours of content from the hosts you know and definitely tolerate. I'll even throw in access to our glamorous and exclusive discord server where bizarre arguments only happen once or twice a week at most. Head to Patreon. to the next five minutes and I won't know because that's not my job, but you'll be enjoying the sweet satisfaction of supporting us and we will love you romantically for it.

That's my promise to you." We love to see it. Hey speaking of shit that sucks so bad and is for Men Over 30 who went to gigs in the 90s, it's time to check in on the band Live! This week's Live Watch. I really missed something there, didn't I? Yeah, you weren't on the episode that makes this make sense, but I'm also not going to provide context. So this is a context, this is fine. This is a tip that was sent into us by maybe the only listener of this podcast that I'm slightly

starstruck by. This lovely man named Matt who owns and runs a video store in Atlanta, Georgia called Video Drime. That's like one of the, I think it might be the only video store in Atlanta. Very cool, independent video store that's been running for a real long time. They do a ton of cool shit. He sent me a link to a very long, very interesting story about how the band Live is being torn apart by a falling out between all the band members possibly due to a series of scams. That's not what we're going to talk about because he also sent me a link to two websites. The first is Live's official website which

has the URL freaks for live.com. So cool. That's amazing. That's a real fucking 90s URL right there. I think do they have an album or a song called Freaks? I think Freaks might be the name of a song by Live. But he also, he sent me a link to the live fan forums, Fans of Live.com, which is still active. And I just wanted to, this is, we're not doing a deep dive on this, I just wanted to take the temperature of what the live fandom is like in the 2000s. So here's a smattering of different threads. So someone started a thread under the title, Heaven?

And it reads as thus, Does anyone love the song Heaven? Do you go to a show really wanting to hear Heaven? It's pretty much become a skip for me. I like the message, but to me the song is just blah. I wish they'd drop it from all their concerts and feature something else. Do you guys know this song off the top of your head? No, I know. Lightning crashes. Yeah. So this one is a sort of very Christian, rocky song where it's like, the chorus is like, I don't need need a to to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to a to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. to to to to to their. their. their. their. their. their, their. their, their, their, their, their, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, the song, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. their song, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the's like, the chorus is like, some about I don't need anyone to tell me about heaven, I look at my daughter and I believe.

That's a very Christian rock sounding anthem. Here are two replies to that. The first here, I'm indifferent, but on the Facebook groups, there seemed to be a lot of people who like it. Last show I went to, my friend said it's his friend's favorite song. My college roommate's girlfriend also really liked it. Really? So you've got two people removed from you, there's a person that likes it. And also someone from far back in your past, their partner likes it. That's very cool. So I just had to check that this song wasn't on the

album Throwing Copper because that is the only one that I would have heard. Well, throwing copper is the good one, so that checks out. Yep. It's the one with the big singles. Yeah. Although there are some people in the Discord who have and will argue that there are good songs on other albums and that is occasionally true. Also something that Matt revealed when he messaged me is that is the last concert he went to before COVID. It was a live concert. Incredible.

Second reply to this, I like the song. I'll always remember my grandfather passing away in the middle of the night getting into my car to go be with my family and heaven came on first when I hit shuffle on my iPhone. Really makes you think. That's just beautiful. That is transcended. Got another post here. There's a thread started under the title Live Fan Demographics.

I've had a YouTube channel for nearly 10 years and YouTube provides some in-depth analytics about the videos so I thought I'd share them with the live community. Here are some stats. Total number of videos, 79. Number of live related videos, 76. Really want to know what those other three videos? I'm deeply curious. Total number of views, 1.8 million.

So we're doing all right. Doing okay for himself. Here are some stats from the last year. Gender. 83% of viewers are male. 17% of viewers are female. Location. 27% are from as a female. Location. 27% are from the USA.

Makes a lot of sense. 24% are from the Netherlands. Yep. Checks out, it all checks out. How is this the runner-up country for live? The next closest is Brazil at 10%. Yeah, come to Brazil, sweetie. Come to Brazil and Koalchik.

5% are from Australia. Don't we have like the same fucking population as the Netherlands? What are they working with over there? I'm just looking at fucking Live's Wikipedia page and there's a photo of them playing live Ed's holding his mic out they got the other members of the band the lead guitarist is wearing an Ed Hardy t-shirt all everyone else is wearing a shirt it is not and the the caption of this image reads the band live playing

live at the 2008 DC 101 Chili Cookoff. Ha ha ha ha ha ha? Just, have you ever been so quickly transported to a place? And got exactly the vibe of the kind of outdoor show that live was playing? That's so fucking perfect. the vibe of the kind of outdoor show that live was playing. That's it. That's so fucking perfect. Um, before we move to the next post,

are you guys aware of the, uh, of the fight club link? Yes, I said that in the last episode. Okay, fine, all right. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. All right. So just to backtrack again, the Netherlands is a population of 17.9 million, which means we are 1.4 times as big as the Netherlands. Yeah. 5% of the views are coming from Australia, which means people from the Netherlands are 5 times

1.4, so what's that? That's like 7, 8, they are 8 times as likely to be a fan of the bad live as people from Australia are. And that feels statistically rigorous to me. Eight times more. It checks out. The live factor of Australia is one, because that's obviously, that's obviously to me. Eight times more. It checks out. The live factor of Australia is one, because that's obviously the base. The live factor of the Netherlands is eight. That's fucking crazy. Ah, 4% of the viewers are from Belgium.

That's the last on the list. Age demographics. Point 4% of the listeners are between 13 and 17. I'll see where this is going. Yeah. 4.2% are between 18 and 24%. Just enjoying the thought of a teenager being super into the life. Oh my god.

You're like 21, you're listening to Leckini's juice for the first time. Oh my god. Where fishers Juice for the first time? Are you like, oh my god. Where fishers go? Have you heard this? I just love classic rock. God, damn. Uh, 21% are between 45 and 54. 4.9% are between 55 and 64.

1.5% are 65 years and older. 44% are between 35 and 44. No, that's right, baby. Nothing in history has ever made more sense than that number. I feel ill, I don't feel good. 44% of something that is broken into seven age categories. Here's one reply to that thread. Very interesting.

The only surprising statistic is the lack of female fans. I would say it's at least 50-50 it shows. It isn't. It is a hundred percent not. That's not surprising at all. You've seen three women at a live show and you've been like, yeah, a lot of cheeks here. Damn. I got another thread here. This is my final one. This one is titled, Ed with Fred Durst picture.

It reads, sorry to create a topic for this, but I remember someone used to have this pick. Who could share it with me? I, let meto have this pick. Who could share it with me? I... Let me just say this is... The old Ed and Fred. This is really putting the internet to good use, you know? To reach out and say, I have imagined a picture.

I have conjured an image in my mind. Can anyone tell me if the image is real? Yeah. And supply the image to me. These days you just Google it, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, let me, let me, let me, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, thean, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. I the me if the image is real? And supply the image to me. These days you just Google it and see if it exists, but instead you have to go to a forum and say, sorry to create a topic for this, but I remember someone used to have this pick, who could share it with me? Arguably a better time.

I have three replies to this. First reply, I don't know if it's a picture, but they were both on ease, the TV channels. Celebrities uncensored standing next to each other. So that's good, useful. Yeah, got a lead. Doesn't have the picture. Another reply. I remember this about that show. Every celebrity's name was under their picture when they showed the footage of them except, two question marks. You. to, two question marks. You. You, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th- the, th. th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, the, th, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the, that, that, that, that, that, the that, the the the the the the the the this about that show. Every celebrity's name was under their picture when they showed the footage of them, except, two question marks. You guessed it, Eddie K, which is what we call Ed Koalchik, the lead singer of live. Like he was just some Polish yucco try to get Fred Durst's autograph. Is that classic anti-Polish discrimination we've come to expect? What an odd detail to throw in there. E, the TV channel, treated Ed Koalchik like he was some random Polish yucco. More than one person saying, I remember that episode of E from the 90s.

Yep, can't help you though. And then finally I have this one here. No, it was actually a video of Ed, Fred, the throth... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It th. It is th. It was th. It was th. It was to to to to to to to to to to to to be to to to to to to to to to to to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. It the. It is the, the, the, the. It the. It the. It's the. It's the. the. the. It the. It's the. the. It's the the the. It's the th. Yep, can't help you though. And then finally I have this one here. No, it was actually a video of Ed, Fred, and Paris Hilton. Ed was wearing his cowboy hat 1999 style and all three were getting into a backseat of a car. Also no picture attached. The same back seat? Yeah, I guess. That's cozy. Also, there was one person posted a photo in there, but the link is dead, so I can't tell if it's actually the photo that they were looking for. You know what you're wearing your cowboy hat, 1999 style? Yeah.

That's drippiest hack. You can wear a cowboy hat right now, 1999 style. Yeah. Gotta get the angle, right? Gotta get the bootcut jeans on. You know? Yeah. That's right, folks.

If you are from the Netherlands, you are eight times more likely than us to enjoy the band live. It's time to head over there and see what else is wrong with them. In Netherlands watch? Everybody I'm from Holland. Isn't that beer? Or Dutch Corner. If you are maintaining the Wikipedia you will have to put both of them in for this episode. From the NL times Mandatory bike helmet law likely in the long run says Dutch association they all got together. The Dutch association that's right. There is a good

chance that the Netherlands will eventually introduce a law make it mandatory for bicyclists to wear a helmet said Dutch traffic organisation AN-B. The Sheath-Beltzel wants also a piece of advice. I expect we will go through the same process for the bicycle helmet in the Netherlands, said, Margaret the Yager, the Yager, the Yager, the Yager, the Yager, the Yager, you know. The N-W-N-W-W-N-W-Gue, it feels. time. Marga de Yaga. It's a beautiful name. Could be Yeager.

Marga de Yaga would be a beautiful man for a girl. It feels. You name your daughter Marga Diaga and then you find out that like it's the most popular name in 2023. Ah, fuck. A lot of Marga de Yagga's in your clan. Marga to Yaga S I was talking to. The Yaga said this on Tuesday at the newest

Burt press center in the Hague at the presentation of figures about road deaths by statistics Netherlands, the CBS. The Support Society for making a helmet mandatory for those on a bike is quote, quite low, according to DiAga. Other traffic organizations such as Cyclist Union Fietas Bond also think that making helmets compulsory will actually lead people to use their bicycles less often. Yeah, this is like the Netherlands's like gun thing. Yeah, where they're just like, you can take it from my cold, dead hands. No, you can put one in my cold dead hands.

People get so mad if you suggest that maybe people should have to wear helmets on a bus. And right now, somebody listening to this is in the process of getting mad. Yeah. I think there's a bunch of things out there where it makes sense to me that a government should say, look, we need to come up with something that we can just say this is the rule. You know, very similar to I think the advice you get around like eating when you're pregnant, like around soft cheeses and you know all the hard and fast rule. Yeah and alcohol and all that sort of stuff.

It's not even a rule. I mean everyone except me. Yeah and and like you know yes you could sort of say oh well with like. the tou. And all that stuff and with alcohol actually you know you can have like a glass of wine or whatever and the percentage of alcohol that's making it's sweaty of your breast milk it's like microscopic you know you know what we actually mean is you shouldn't be drinking a bunch and over a long

period of time that kind of stuff it's way easy to just say don't everyone stopped listening at this point. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Instead, don't drink alcohol, don't smoke cigarettes. Yeah. Don't need things that can give you food poisoning, right? I think it's the same thing for helmets. If you're on a bike, unless you are Ben McLeave or can fail Queensland. You've had like two beers and you just want to fill the wind in your hair while you're riding on a bike. And then it's fine. That's the thing that they won't tell you, that the fucking fascist bureaucrats at Queensland Health won't admit that riding on a bike without a helmet on feels incredible. Oh it feels great. It feels great and like I'm... don't get us

wrong. And again, different contexts, you know, if you just ride and ride down the street, to your kids school, pick them up from school, it's fine. Going not very far away. But as a person who has had at least two accidents on a bike where I was very injured. Boy was I glad I was wearing a helmet. I got so injured when I came off my bike. And had a helmet on, I banged the skull, real bad. Longtime listeners of this podcast will remember the Theo bike incident era of 2017. That fucked you up pretty bad.

Flipped my shit and landed headfirst. Oh dude. And like when you're an adult all your shit's getting brittle. Yeah, people have heard me over recent months talking about my new fear of ladders and all I think. My shit's brittle as fuck, dude. And yeah, I've had a couple and like obviously I'm going to be wearing a helmet if in one instance I was riding like in traffic to work, fine. You're on the street with cars, all that sort of stuff. Absolutely wear because I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that that that the. the. the. theatheatheatheatheatheatheat. that. that. the. the. the. the. the. My th. My th. My th. My th. My th. My th. My. My th. My. My. My th. My th. My. My. My. My. My th. My th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin. And, theatt. And, theatt. And, theat theat theat thriii's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's shit's thr. My thr. Absolutely wear a helmet. Because I got jacked the fuck up and came way off that bike

and I landed on my head and shoulder. And it cracked a chunk off the back of my helmet, you know? And I was like, hey, my whole body hurts, and my head is fine. But that could have been a bit of your skull that cracked off. And they are designed to break on impact because it absorbs the force of the blows. That's a good sign that your helmet's work. Oh, and that it did the thing. So you know, wear one, don't wear one, whatever.

I guess we're really coming down on a, like, be safe, but, be safe but don't be a pussy? I think that's the... Yeah, I think the official opinion of this podcast is that by and large it should be mandatory to wear a helmet on a bike, but come on, right now. Yeah, unless you don't want it. Sometimes you've had a couple of beers. Yeah. Yeah.

No, I had a couple of beers and rode a bike home one time and I did go. The wind feels good on my face. It's like a handful of pints. And my eyes are closed and all I can feel is the rush of movement. I absolutely closed my eyes for a second, feel that beautiful breeze, and I immediately started turning and rode straight into the gutter and fell right down and got got very hurt. And I was glad I was wearing my helmet. So we're worried that they're going to use their bicycles less often. Quote, young people are now choosing the fat bike because of the helmet requirement. You know what you're doing, warned director Esther van Gartherin.

A fat bike is an electric assisted bicycle with thicker tires. Don't call it that. Don't call it the fat bike. That's an electric assisted bicycle with thicker tires. Don't call it that! Don't call it the fat bike. That's an electric point. Young people are now choosing the fat bike because of the helmet requirement. Know what you're doing, warned Director S. the Vanguard. So who is she saying that to? What is the...

Portant... Mind how you go. What are you talking about? Because of the helmet requirement, they're choosing electric assisted bicycles? But surely they have to wear helmets on those too? Surely. Hmm. Statistics Netherlands calculated the number of those too? Surely! Hmm.

Statistics Netherlands calculated that the number of cycling deaths rose from 207 in 2021 to 291 last year, the majority of whom were cyclists over the age of 75. Jesus Christ! Why everyone rides bikes there? Look, because it's beautiful. Yes, but given what we were just saying about like I'm 40 now and the idea of having the kind of fall that I had like you know ten years ago terrifies me. I'm picturing the fall that I had where I went head over the handlebars and landed like vertically on my skull except with a 75 year

year old it just going into like mortal combat x-ray vision. Yep. And their entire spine just shattering from head to tailbone. You are immediately exploding on impact like the frozen T-1000. To a fine powder, it's tinkling, tinkling on the road. 75. Damn. Statistics Netherlands that it suspects the increase is partly due to the rise on the road. 75, damn. Statistics Netherlands said it suspects the increase is partly due to the rise of the e-bike, the treacherous e-bike.

It must be made clear why people should opt for a helmet, added CBS researcher Ruben van Galen. On Wednesday, the bicycle helmet will be the focus of a day of action. Doctors and organizations in the field of safety like Hersonsticting and Viglik have again insisted on the need for mandatory bicycle helmets. This can significantly reduce the risk of injuries including brain trauma and especially for children and e-bikers. Since January helmets are compulsory for scooters everywhere in the Netherlands. Just fucking put it on. Come on. Yeah I realize it's like a cultural thing that they've been doing this forever and it's very nice. It's very.. And it's very th. It's very th. It's very th. It's very th. It's th. It's th. It's th. I th. the th th th th the th th the th th the th the the the the the the the the the the thi, thi the thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the need the need the need the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I've thi. I've thi. theeat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat theat the. thi. th everywhere in the Netherlands. Just fucking put it on, come on. Yeah, I realize it's like a cultural thing that they've been doing this forever and it's very nice and I would I love the casualness of like just

being able to get on a bike and ride without the incredible embarrassment of wearing a helmet, but at the same time, what are you fucking doing over there? So what you shit out. Yeah, like, you know, if you break your arm, that's gonna suck, right? You know, no two ways about it. That's gonna stink, but you know, your arm will get better. Maybe if you're old, if you're old like us and you break your arm, that's probably gonna hurt forever. Yeah, that's it for me that's gonna hurt forever. Or if you're like, if you're like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi that's that's thi. that's thi, thi, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's to to to to to that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, that's, that's, that's that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. that's th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's thi. that's probably thi. that's probably thi. that's probably that's probably thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's for me. Or if you like, yeah, if you like break your elbow or some shit like that, you know,

that's really gonna suck. Giving yourself an acquired brain injury, midway through life, you know what that. Don't do that. That's the official stance of the podcast, Wundervista. Do not give yourself an acquired brain injury through a bicycle accident. That's right. We like to joke a lot, but let us be serious for one second. Wear a fucking helmet unless you really don't want to. That's right. Unless you don't feel like it and then don't. We report you decide.

All the crazy cons. I'm being deadly serious here. Just wear a fucking helmet unless you think it would be more fun if you weren't wearing one. Yes, unless you want to feel the breeze, unless you want to look cool. Yeah. It's probably going to slow you down if that's a fact. Yeah. That's right folks. Ride a bicycle or don't. Helmut or don't. Kind of like skate or die. Yeah. Ride or don't. Yep.

Thanks everybody. See you next time? Yeah. Keep up the good playper work. Plug this podcast to someone whose relationship you could take or leave. We need to start a finishing podcast like we're wrapping up a date. Hang on. Yeah.

Had a lot of fun. Would you be interested in doing this again sometime? I felt like we had a bit of action. You seem like you were laughing a bunch. I felt that the energy was great. Maybe you want to plug it to someone else. I don't know. Do you want to get crazy. to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their thra. thra. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea.a. thea.a. I. the the the the the the the the th someone else. I don't know. Do you want to get, do you want to get crazy and bring another person into this? How about we go back to your place and we tell your roommate about the podcast? They talked a lot about the bad live. Yeah, the dolphins cry. Yeah. cry yeah well see next week Peehbs. Piss. Yeah. Piss. Yeah.

Yeah. Piss. I'm P. Piss. Wien's good though. Yeah. Yeah.

Checking what the. I fucking check out the lobster. The album by ween. Yep. God damn. The mollus. The mollus, is that who you talk about? album by wean. Yep. God damn. They're genius. Is that who you talk about? The...

You just say it's a lobster. Ben put out the end of the show. Ben put out the end of the show.