Boonta Vista - EPISODE 296: With Arms Wide Shut

Episode Date: May 11, 2023

Theo, Andrew and Ben bring you: The three visitations of an invited bear, the dangers of the buffet on deck 16, how to make a battery disappear, the most disappointing ant in the colony, and turkey mistakes. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Welcome to Buente Vista episode 296. We're getting close to the big 300. You're probably pretty excited, but don't think about that too much right now. My name is Andrew and I'm here in the part of Disney where everyone's a dog for some reason. You know how in some cartoons, Goofy's a dog, but also everyone else is a dog, All the people in the department stores, people driving around in cars, but they're also dogs. Weird. Coming out of a yellow turtleneck that only sells yellow turtleneck to wear under his black vest is Theo. Hey, how you going. Does this yellow turtleneck under my black vest hide the fact that my entire dick is out? Uh, yeah, th, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, th, th. Hey, th. Hey, th. Hey, th. Hey, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, th. thi, they, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. theoo. theoo. they's they's they's they's they's they's their, their, their, the black vest hide the fact that my entire dick is out? Uh, yeah. Pretty much. Cool. Pretty much. But we don't really talk about that that much

being, like, we're all anthropomorphic dogs. It's sort of, you stop seeing it after a while. Yeah, yeah. The fact that all our wieners are out the whole time. And we under my shirts. Or are they because, yucking it up as he sauntered th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th as th as th as th as th as th as the whole time. Or are they? Or are they because, yucking it up as he saunters down the street in a yellow turtleneck black vest and non-standard issue blue ruggers, it's Ben! Bad news, Ben, we're going to take you to the hospital, which is also a vet and euthanize you because you are not wearing the same blue pants as the rest of us. It's my nasty little dick out. Yeah, just at the bottom of one leg of your blue ruggers. Oh man, I had a, I hadn't, I had a run in with a rugger's wearer just the other day. Coptony-nifle, no good. We're talking human dick and balls here.

And we haven't hung out in the last couple of weeks is... No, this is a different one. Yeah, okay. You and my father-in-law should... I'm not coming from inside the building. Compared with the... Sorry, I need a little more detail here. What was the scenario? Run us through it. Well, I guess... Describe the balls that you saw. Well, let's start off with the setting in the setting, the setting, the setting, the setting, the setting, the setting, the setting, the setting, the setting, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the in the lounge room. Not my lounge room. This is their lounge room. And he was sitting on a little poof thing.

It was like a round cushion. An Ottoman perhaps. Not quite an Ottoman, a thundon, Jr. No, I get. I think an Ottoman to me is a certain size. So an Ottoman is like at least sort of three feet wide. So yeah, we didn't have a fan on.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thatheauauauau. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, thoom, to thoom, thi, that, to thoom, thoom. th. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thu. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to be th. th. to be th. the th. to be th. th. the th. th. toe. toe. tha. toea. toea. toea. toea. So, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sort of three feet wide. So yeah, we didn't have the fan on. So you need to keep things circulated there.

Sort of legs akimbo. Mm-hmm. Little did he know, or perhaps somewhat did he know, that for all the world to see. So any underpants under the rug? Oh no, no, no, no, no. That's a bold choice. Ben. Ben. Ben. Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, Ben, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, thi. thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. th to. th th no no no no no no that's a bold choice. Ben I assume you're strapping on some underwear before you leave. I'm wearing underpants because I'm like a regular normal human being. Yeah yeah yeah

and also no underpants phase. Ruggers are like probably one of the rougher materials out there. It's a thin, rough cotton. Yeah. Real. This is a country cotton. This is not a city cotton. We do things a little differently at the Ruggers Factory in Southeast Asia. The good people who are wholesaling to Lowe's clothing stores, they have figured out the cheapest possible way to construct a pair of shorts.

And look, half of that equation is, you know, how can we really cut down costs? What if, what if we used half as much fabric as your average shorts by simply making them half the size? Yeah, and then they pass those savings on to you. And also, what if we would have further reduced costs by making it the very thin? Very thin very poor quality cotton you know You know tough about the freedom of movement though. Yeah, you're getting around in those things They got a little bit of they got like a little bit of elastic in the corner they've been with the seams the seems no No, okay, but you're thinking of perhaps the stubby the stub. st stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub stub that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thus. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. that's th. that's th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're thin. they're theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. thin. thin. thin. No. Okay. You're thinking of perhaps the stubby, which does. Or... I don't have stubby money.

That's a true Ford v. Holden situation there. You're a stubby's man, you're a ruggers man. Yeah. I've always been a ruggers man. Tells you where you're from. I went and bought some ruggers during the summer. Because I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I, th. I, th. th. th. th. thuice, thuice, thuice, thuice, thuice, thuble. I was, thubbby's, thubby's, thubby, thubby, thubby, thubbue. I was, thubbue. I was, thubububububbue. I was, thu. I was, thu. I was, thu. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was trun, truy. I was true. I was true. I was true. I was. I was, true. I was, true. I was tru summer of the two inch in seam or whatever yeah you know and I said hey I'm gonna learn from the best learn from man I look up to and I asked Ben where do I get those bad boys said go into lows do not get the the new revised cut of

rug you want rugged ruggers classic yeah classic Yeah classic trial short original drill short yeah, yep, they got new ruggers No, they're shit. Well, yeah ruggers for cowards basically. Yeah, and I think they should have to take the name off if you're gonna give us like a four inch in seam. Why don't you just stop calling them ruggers? Why don't you sell me a pair of jing co-in- know, if you give me a four-inch inseam, you might as well be giving me one of those rave pants that have a hula hoop at the bottom to keep them wide. Why don't you call them Longs? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Really taken it to him this week. We're coming out blazing. Take that Pepsi Coal or whoever the fuck makes. Coca-Cola Amatil I believe makes ruggers. It's Asahi.

Assahee makes rugges. Oh my god. We make them under license here. Yeah they own Lion Nathan. Lion Nathan owns the Ruggers factory. Who do you think actually? King G? Is a King G that makes ruggers? I don't believe believe th. th. th. th. th. th. th th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. Who th. Who th. Who the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Who. Who. Who. Who. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. thi. thi. thi. toge. togu. togu. togu. togu. togu. togucoe. togucoe. Who. Who. Who. Who. Who.? King G? Is it King G that makes ruggers? I don't believe so? According to Queensland Workwear Suppliers, because if you Google. Oh it is the King Gings, Min's original rugger. My league. Oh no, but look here's a different clothing store that says Stubbies Ruggers. They can't be Stby's ruggers.

And if you're an American listener, really sorry about this episode already, like five minutes in. Oh, waste of your time. If you're an American listener, don't post, don't reply. Yep. Do not engage. Don't contact us. Don't join the discord.

And immediately be like, so you guys do some pretty weird things at Australia, don't you? Yeah. We don't. Hey, is it yesterday in here? Nope, it's today. It's today, dickhead. Yeah, I would know, because my subjective experience of time is objectively correct. Encountering an American who attempts to tell me what they perceive to be reality. It's the one thing I didn't want to happen. It's time for the one thing we didn't want to happen. This is the one thing we didn't want to happen. How's that though?

We got to the first segment in seven minutes. It's pretty good. It's pretty good. Yeah. It's flying. That's flying along. Probably gonna run out of material. Sorry, everybody how this ends it goes. We want to do one hour. Precisely. Yeah. We like to really, really hit it on the button. So if we can find something annoying to hyperfixade on around the 25 minute mark. Yeah. That's gonna set us up for. That's good. You've, you've, you've really primed me for it at that. the that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. the the that. the the the the. the. the. to. the. the. the. to. to. to. the. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. the. I. to. to. to. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I. the. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. to.'ve success You've really primed me for it at this point. What was that band that was like live but worse creed? Yeah. I always thought they were like I always thought they were like nickelback but worse It's creed. I always thought they were sort of like Christian rock pearl jam. Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's get into this. And so they had that song with arms wide open which I think was about

heaven. Yeah. Followed up with arms wide closed did not do as well. Okay. Arms wide shut. Yeah. But Stanley Cubic's arms wide shut. Oh, from CNN, the Cannonon. Colorado homeowner cited for feeding wildlife after Bear enters home three times. Bear enters your house once, shame on the bear. Bear enters your house two times. I guess still there. Shame on the bear. Yeah and then three times. What are you doing, pal? You have failed to purchase a blunderbuss between the second and third incursion. That's right. The owner of a home in an upscale Colorado

Springs neighborhood. Bloody da! Yeah. Was cited last week for feeding big game animals after a black bear entered the residence three times within two days. Yeah. How are you supposed to get the bear to leave? Well, first of all, there's a sign on the only road that goes into the subdivision, saying this is a no bear subdivision. Yeah. Gated community. That means you. Yeah. Stay out. Colorado Parks and Wildlife, the CPW. Personnel trapped and euthanized the bear. Oh. Ben.

Hey, come on now that's my fault. I didn't ask them bear. Oh, Ben. Hey, come on now, that's my fault. I didn't ask them to do that. How are you gonna hit us with a gentle Ben getting killed story? Right up front. Can I distract you with a little bit of true? We decide. Yeah. Colorado Springs is right next to Cheyenne Mountain, which is the setting of the fictional secret

Air Force base in Stargate, the Cheyenne Mountain Complex. Huh. Yeah, which is an actual military base, which I believe is the military base featured in War games, I think. And if you're considering fact-checking this... in war games, I think. Okay. And if you're considering fact-checking this... Don't. It's also the setting for the debut album of Connor Youngblood,

a lovely little semi-ambient folk electronica thing. Check that out. Oh. Connoyang the album Cheyenne, it's nice. I also, I think I've been there. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. This is important stuff. The Bruin entered a broad more home through an open door on Sunday.

Is that what a Bruin is? No, it's a hockey team. Yes, okay. A hockey team came in. So the door was open, you're saying? An open door. That's sort of on you, I think. The neighborhood in the southwest Colorado Springs foothills is considered prime bear habitat by CPW staff. The homeowner found muddy paw prints on the home's floor and closed the door. However, the bear returned and opened the same door. What kind of door you got going now? So, okay. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's sort that's sort that's sort that's sort that's sort that's sort th. That's sort that's sort that's sort th. That's sort that's sort that's sort of that's that's that's that's that's th door. However, the bear returned and opened the same door.

What kind of door you got going now? So, okay, so sorry, so the bears been in the house, they've left the house. The owners come in, they've seen the poor prince in the house, and then they've closed the door. They've said, oh, lucky there's no bear in here. Yeah, they've closed the door door the door, finally, free of bears forever, and then the bears open the door. Turns out the bear- I hate to interject here. I was at the Walmart Supercenter in

Colorado Springs on the 13th of August 2017, so I hope that clears that up. Yep. And if you are keeping notes of Ben's whereabouts, just update your logs accordingly. The bear this time walked to the kitchen. He's hungry. Looking for a picnik basket I think. He is. Yeah, there's probably some sort of trumpet or French horn playing sort of sillily as it's saunted into the, into the kitchen. Bum. Bum. Can we, can we be real for a second? Yeah. Do you guys want to you guys want to... as it sauntered into the into the kitchen. Boom, bomb, bomb. Can we be real for a second? Yeah.

Do you guys want to? Yeah. Can we take a brief? I've turned my chair back around the correct way. Yep. Can we, uh, the correct way? When you're keeping it real, don't you put the back of the chair out and that's a fool's way to sit. He was sitting hip-hop style earlier,

and now he's turned it back around to a tentive student. Knees together, hands perched on upper thighs. Yeah, and I'm right in your face, right now as well. He watched the movie Save the Last dance, and he decided to come into this podcast recording, sitting cool style backwards on the chair and now he's gone, wait, that was a mistake. Hold on. Let's be real, I'm put my chair around frontwards. All right, well, I would like to keep a real and say, I think, in reality, Yogi Bair would have

been euthanized really quite quickly into the run of the show. Oh, some of the shit that he gets up to. Honestly, it actually kind of makes me sick. Yeah, there's like a finite number of picker Nick baskets that you can steal. Before they are coming down there, tranking you, and that's it, it's over for you. And you're teaching a smaller bear to do it. So, that's an example also. You're going in the huge air fryer. Yep. You're going in the bear clinker. That's just for bears. You are going to be a beautiful rug. Beautiful rug with a nice green hat.

Quote, the bear was reluctant to leave their kitchen, C.P.W. stated, only after yelling and banging pots and pans did the bear retreat and leave the home. Well, the bear probably got sick of banging the pots and pans together after a while. Oh, there he is. He's used semantic ambiguity to imply that the bear was doing those things. You can't keep getting away with this. The comedy is flying thick and fast. I don't think we should keep drawing attention to how bad the comedy is. That's... I think... No, people love it. People actually love it when you remind them how stupid and bad the show is. You can be listening to a scripted comedy podcast, but you know what, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th, that, th, th, th, th, th-it, th-it, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi, thi, thi, you thi, you thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, you can can can can can't thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi them how stupid and bad the show is. You can be listening to a scripted comedy podcast, but you know what, that's fake.

Oh, yuck. Yeah, that's like drinking a diet coke when you could be sucking the sugar directly out of sugar cane. I like to think that this is a thing you can just put on, you can kind of just switch off. And nothing good's going to happen. You know that nothing important is important important that this is this is a thing you can just put on you can you can kind of just switch off and nothing good's gonna happen you know that nothing important is going to occur. If you're not doing a long highway drive or getting some long overdue chores done while you're listening to this Jesus Christ yeah I'm try to imagine someone listening to this show right and one of their family members comes into the room with a problem and they're like, hold on. Hold on. I need five minutes to see where this is going. Where's going with this. Yeah. I'm about to tell you something interesting.

Are there some jokes coming up? Hold on. They've said they're about to get real. I just think of them like scrambling for the pause button, like they're just, someone's walking on looking at porn. Yeah. Ugh, I was just whacking off. Um, look, I'm gonna keep a real with you folks. If there is a bear in my kitchen, I will be the one to leave the kitchen. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, don't ask the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear that's that's that's that's the bear that's the bear that's the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the the the the their their their their their that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the that's their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to leave the kitchen. Yeah, that's it. You go. Yeah, don't ask the bear to leave. Go to your neighbor's house, who presumably has a lockable door.

Yeah. Eventually you're gonna get to a house that doesn't have a bear in it. Yeah. Stay there until the bear situation improves. Yeah, we actually have a really good algorithms these days for the quickest route to determine a bearless house. I don't the the the the the the the the th. I the the th. I th. I the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. I the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the bear the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tree.ea the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the these days for the quickest route to determine a baleas house. I don't know what you've been reading. It's still N.P. Hard, Ben. You can't actually use an algorithm to find a bearless house without discovering a bear first. It's BNB uncomplete, am I right? That's a little computer science joke. No, no, it's fine. There's like 80% of our audience, I think. Yeah, I think that'll resonate with nine out of 10 people to listen to this. The other 20% of the audience are slowly boiling an enormous source pin of piss on it.

Hey, if you listen to this podcast episode because you saw that the title was the BNB problem and you thought, now that sounds like something for me. Please be cooler. I actually have an IT degree. I just choose not to use it. Oh boy. I met a guy today's couple came over to our house because they're yeah yeah because their kid was over visiting or with our kid and and the sky was like oh what do you do and I was like a UX designer and he was like oh okay yeah I'm a software engineer and our wives both went

are they like the same thing? Wow. And we both went, yes, we both just said yes. Because that's what I say anything now. Anybody ask me what I do and I give any kind of description and they say oh like this and say something it's kind of adjacent to that and I say yes. Yeah, computer. Computer. I'm on computer. I go to the computer store every day. I am the computer store.

Because let's be real, who gives a fuck? You know? No one needs to know in any great detail. But yes, I, frankly, I would prefer to be on the other side of a door from a bear, and I don't really mind if I'm the one who's inside or outside. Like, you can go through my shit. Yep. Like, if he's in the kitchen and I'm like, oh, no, he's going to go through, you know, I've got some nice things. I got from the Mediterranean wholesaler. I've got my weird chips. I got from the Asian grocers. I've got a few stables. If like my choice is I have to get him out of

there or he can have my truffle-flavored turtle chips, have them. I'm getting out of here. I'm leaving. I'm jumping through the window, the kitchen is yours. Do whatever you need to do. I'm going next door. I'm going to Tony's place. Oh can I um can I give a quick Buntavista product review? Because we do want this show to be informative don't we? Yeah. Yes. All right. Can I give a very thorough Buntavista two thumbs down to the El Sabroso guacca chip, guacamole flavored tortilla chips. Okay, we... Did you know what you were doing when you purchased that? Because that sounds bad.

It does. It sounds like something that shouldn't be kind of powdered and then baked onto a chip. Yeah. Well, the whole chip is green. Like green through and thrown so there's no picture of the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip the chip. Like green through and through. And so there's no picture of the chip on the packet? Yeah. And I went, well it said, get this, little tagline says, the dip is in the chip. Yeah. Yeah, that's fucking stupid. That's gonna mess with the chemistry of the chip. It sure did. It sure did. It sure did. And it says, hey, we put all this guacamole, you know, we put all this avocado in the chip.

And then I looked at the ingredients and it was like, all the ingredients of a chip. And then, you know how like, I think, I think it moves, like the ingredients are sort of in order of how much of the thing they make up, right? That's correct, yes. Yeah, so I'm going to say maybe the penultimate ultimate ultimate pen ultimate pen ultimate pen ultimate pen ultimate pen ultimate the pen ultimate the penultimate ingredient was avocado powder. I, you've made a Rube's decision. I expect better of you, you're a flavor pimp. You should know better than this. You got to get the foundations right.

You've got to get a chip that is a good chip first and then start adding flavors to it. You got to set yourself up for failure. You set yourself up for failure there. You are the man that built his house on sand. You are. And you should build your house upon the rock, as the Bible tells us. That's exactly right.

And some other things the Bible tells us. to let's get agree that I am a flavor pimp, but thank you cannot reach, you cannot reach any heights Without trying some stuff. Oh, you're fucking around Yeah, I fucked around and I found out in the elements particular kind sometimes You're fuck around with an exotic snack for the Asian grocer or the IGA who has all the weird chips and You're in a whole new world of snacking sensations, you know, yeah, no, I'm with you I'm with you. I'm with you. I'm with you, like???? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. they. they? they? they. they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the trying trying trying trying trying trying trying? trying? trying. trying. try. trying. trying. trying. trying. trying. trying. trying. trying. trying. trying. they. they. th. the the the weird chips and you're in a whole new world of snacking sensations, you know? Yeah, no, I'm with you. I'm with you, like picking up a mystery product from the Asian grocers. Yep. Sometimes. Great activity. At least you're going to discover a new exciting flavor that you didn't know existed, even if it's bad, but getting a fucking, a Western guacamole chip,

come on. I expect better of you. I had never seen them before. Most on wise. I had never seen them before. Also I was in a rush. I was in a rush. It was lunchtime and I hadn't eaten luncheon.

Quick, quick. I just went, give me the chip that looks like Shrek. Give me the closest chip. Yep. Looks like someone pure age, Shrek. Damn. And Lucy will be back soon, I promise. You do promise. It's not our fault that she has stuff to do. How much of a delicate balance is. She injects some sort of much-needed ingredient eggs.

She also is very unambiguous about getting us back onto subject. She's like, so what about this thing? You're like, oh, that's right. We were talking about what if there was a bear in your kitchen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now I will give a hearty two thumbs up.

To the lonely god potato twists. Oh, we love lonely god potato twists. What is, what is, what is. th, what is. th, what is???? that? that? that? th, what is. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. that. thi. thi. thi. that. that. that is. that is that is that is that is thi. thi, thi's thi's thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that that that that that that that that thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thumbs up to the lonely god potato twists. Oh we love lonely god potato twists. What is what is that? My kids love when we go to the to the Asian grocer that we like it's very funny. It's dead in heaven is empty potato chips. It's so funny. What is that name? It's so funny to hear your little daughter say, can we get the lonely god chips? Now my understanding is that the lonely god potato chip twist thing, the lonely god thing is a bad translation of Cupid. Okay. As in like he's the god who cures loneliness, kind of?

Well, if you look at the mascot, he's a little guy with angels wings and he's wearing a diaper and he's got a bow I don't see any bow he's got a wand on the one I'm looking at it oh a computer yeah on the computer yeah on the computer yeah you're on a computer he's got his kitchen in front of his laptop he's got a wand on all of them I can see him he someone tell me that on Twitter and now I'm starting to doubt whether it's real. Oh, you read something on Twitter and you thought it was true? Yeah, I probably think Elon's good. Oh, this guy loves Elon. The bear returned Monday night and again entered through an open door.

You gotta need to start closing that door. Yeah. Get it on the latch, you know? Yeah. Don't just don't just kind of don't swing it closed. Don't just let it kind of close itself. Wait till it clicks. Push it till it clicks. Quote it's extremely fortunate. No one was injured by this bear when it confronted the homeowners in the kitchen when the bear confronted them Hey, stop mark Linda Sick of your shit The bear starts banging pots and pans together

This bear had become habituated to people associating them as a food source. Well, they kind of are, you know. They are a food source. They are a food source. They probably have a full cupboard. And they're made of meat. The bears probably looking at Mark and Linda and seeing like you know the big ambiguous piece of meat with a single bone sticking out of it, floating. Or like a, like a steaming turkey. Yeah. So I think with bears the thing is that we they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they're probably they're probably they're probably they are they are they're probably they're probably they're probably they're probably they're probably they're probably they're probably. They they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are their th. They're probably. They're probably. They're probably. I their their th. they're probably. they're probably. they're probably. they're probably. they're probably. Or like a steaming turkey. Yeah. See, I think with bears, the thing is that we are already the food product. So they don't have to use cartoon logic to imagine us as a hot dog.

They look at us and they see us as an us, which is a thing they make. You're making the sort of like jingling noise and the exact same picture of Austin. We're standing there as we were before but with our shoes and belts off. Yeah, yeah. All the metal is gone. Put some, puts the whole person in his mouth, pulls out just the bones and the belt buckle? The human skull. And the iPhone 10 still attached to the ribcage. Yeah, pacemaker dangling. It's created a dangerous situation when the bear was confronted in a confined

in a confined space in the home. Okay, whose fault is the bear confronting the homeowners confronting the bear? He's just mind in his own business. Yeah, in fault is that? Is the bear confronting the homeowners or are the homeowners confronting the bear? He's just mind in his own business. Yeah, in your house. In your house. Trying to find his house. It's prime bear territory, they said. Yeah.

What the fuck did you set up there? It's a hostile buyo to live in Kansas? What's going on in Kansas? Probably not going to get a beer, a beer, a beer, probably not going to get a beer in your kitchen in Kansas, I don't think. Yeah. Per CPW policy, any bear that enters the residence must be euthanized. That's BS in my opinion. Yeah. B. I think if you let the bear get into your house you should have to move. Yeah, or be euthanized. That's. It, the beer. B. It, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, the beer, the bear. It, the bear. It, the bear. It, the beer, the beer. It, probably. It, probably. It, the beer. It, probably. It, probably. It, the beer. It, probably. Probably, the beer. Probably, the beer. Probably, the beer. It, the beer. That, the beer. Yeah. Yeah. It, the beer. Yeah. It, the beer. It, the beer. It, the beer. It, the beer. B, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. B. B. Yeah, the the the the the the th. the the the the the the the the the if you let the bear get into your house, you should have to move. Yeah, or be euthodized. That's not you, bro. It's the bear's house now. Quick, trank him. You left the door open again, you get tranked.

You get tranked. You wake up and you're in Kansas. You have been moved at your expense. You know? Government can dock your pay to pay for the move and also the cost of selling your former home. Yeah, we've humanely relocated the Smith family. Hopefully they won't have another encounter. I think they should just, um, yeah, they should move you away at your own expense, the government buys the house. In a big old cage of the curtain over it so you

can't tell which direction you're going. I'm sleepy. Release you in a movie theatre. They wake up. They're in innercity Milwaukee. Quote, wild bears are naturally afraid of people and avoid them. Cronin stated. When a bear learns that human homes are a source of food, they become dangerous to people. Imagine encountering a bear in your kitchen. You imagining it? My kitchen's so fucking small.

It's basically impossible to imagine. It's, look, if nothing else, it's going to be awkward. Yeah. Sorry, I just need to... I just need to... Oh, just behind you. Can you just... I love that we're both having a glass of wine standing here while I'm cooking,

but also every time I need to get anything the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to get to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be, the the the the their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, just, just time I need to get anything from the cupboard or the shelf, I'm just kind of, oops, oh, no, neat. The bears shuffling around, trying to get out of your way, knocking absolutely everything off every shelf in the process. Yeah. And there is a spot you could sit on the other side of the bench and you, oh, okay, don't don't, oh, oh, don't, oh, don't, oh, don't, don't, oh, oh, oh, don't, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the, the, the, the, oh, the, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the, oh, oh, oh, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the, the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, don't worry about it. If there is no clear exit available, a tragic confrontation could occur, and we can't risk that happening. That's why we euthanize the Smith family. Because you know what, bears, as far as I know,

don't know how to close doors. Humans, on the other hand, they do. So where should the responsibility lie? This is a skill issue as far as I'm I. Yep. Who should be copying the penalty here? Not this beautiful, gentle bear, suffering merely because he smelled a delicious picniic basket. Yeah. Trapping and releasing the bear in a more remote area was not a consideration. Why not? It should have been. It's because, quote, Colorado has become so densely populated that it is difficult to find a place to take a bear so that it won't encounter human homes.

What if less human homes? Take the bear somewhere nice. Take the bear to Jamaica. The bear weighed between 225 and 250 pounds. So he's hungry boy. We need treats. Needs. The homeowner was cited for feeding big game and also was warned for leering bears.

So the contention is that they were trying to make friends with the bears? Well, I think the next sentence should shed some light on this one. We're not up to the next sentence yet. Yeah, all we can do is speculate now. Good point. The homeowner was cited for Feeding Big Game, CPW's Bill Vogrin did not go into detail about how this homeowner was attracting wildlife to the property, but did offer an example.

Quote, feeding Big Game can be as simple as putting out birdseed in such a way that Big Game can easily access it. Come on, that's for the birds. Yeah, I guess that is for the birds. Yeah, I guess it's true that that's for the birds. I guess when you're putting bird seed out, the bird seed is for the birds. So is that what what what what what what what that what that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the the that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the today is is today is today is today is today is today is today is today is today is thi the the the the is for the birds. Would you agree with that Theo? Would you agree that it's for the birds?

When you put bird seed out? Sorry, it just seems like something's happening to you right now. So basically he's been fined for still not closing his door. Yeah. I'm fine for just not getting his door. Yeah. I'm fine for just not getting it together. Yeah. Just shut the door. Put it on the latch.

Please. Sir, sir, sir, please. Or just stop being such a baby when a bear turns up in your house. There's a bear in here. I need someone to kill this bear for me. Are you tired of paying nothing for the same old superior quality free episodes of the Buntavista podcast? Do you want less politics and more content about diarrhea, our animals gone wild?

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Sign up in the next five minutes and I won't know because that's not my job, but you'll be enjoying the sweet satisfaction of supporting us, and we will love you romantically for it. That's my promise to you. Here's a little thought experiment for you. What if instead of euthanizing the bear, we sedated it and relocated it to a P&O Fairstar Cruise? Yes.

Oh. Now we're talking, right? I hadn't even considered that. Well now that you're in the cruise zone, it's time for Cruise Watch. You know, sometimes I worry that this podcast is a little dry. You know, it's just like, it's a bunch of people reading news stories, word for word, which is not like... Don't explain it, otherwise other people could copy it.

You know, there's just like, it's a bunch of people reading news stories, word for word, which is not like... Don't explain it otherwise other people could copy it. Is that where we're going to find several uncharismatic? Where else you're going to find people to continually derail the conversation that you're having? I just thought that maybe we need a format that's a little jazier than that that doesn't seem, you know, as predictable and boring. So what I'm going to do to you, do to you and for you. Wait, sorry, just to clear it up. Are you about to, are you about to do something to me and Theo or to the listener?

Both. Because you too and the listener are listening to this. Instead of just reading a boring old news story, I'm gonna read to you from a report on an inspection made on the 27th of April this year by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention on the cruise ship the MSC seaside. Yep, now we're not. But to make it, to jazz it up a little, you're going to do it in a rest of voice the whole hazy. Waghuan, brethren. Irie. No, unfortunately, everything on the MSC, C-side was not IRIE, because they received a grade of 67, which is well below the 86 required to pass the inspection.

God, that's so high. You gotta get a beep, B plus? Those are completely arbitrary numbers you don't know what the upper bound is, so it's hard to actually gauge the level of success or failure there with their third data point. I'm going to give you some some highlights in a sense here so this is a violation that was committed on the buffet on deck 16 at the passenger hand washing stations. Two passenger handwashing sinks did not have soap in the passenger hand washing stations. Two passenger handwashing sinks did not have soap in the automatic dispensers or the dispenser was not working properly. This was observed at the main entrance and the starboard entrance. So can't wash your hands at the buffet on deck 16. Okay.

Which that's a problem because I wasn't going to anyway. As we know about cruise ships, everything spreads there very quickly, but don't worry about that, that's fine. Here's another violation from the buffet on deck 16. Service tongs. The handles of different self-service serving tongs were touching food out for passenger self-service throughout this open outlet. This included the following food items, sliced melons, bread rolls, apples, plums, and muffins. So no one's washing their hands and then they're

grabbing the tongs and then the tongs are resting in the food. Okay. Fantastic. Here is another violation from the buffet on deck 16. Food protection. Individual bowls of raisins Here is another violation from the buffet on deck 16. Food protection. Individual bowls of raisins, granular sugar and jam out for passenger self-service at different service stations were not adequately positioned under the sneeze guard, nor were they protected with lids or other effective means. Stay away for the buffet on deck 16.

Because you are getting something. Real fast. Whatever's going around. Real lucky dip situation, I think. Here's a violation from the galley on deck 8. So this is a bit longer, so bear with me here. A crew member previously observed cooking raw hamburgers at the hamburger buffet station entered the galley with a trolley cart containing an empty hotel container with

leftover paper wrappings and a layer of pooled hamburger blood. The crew member moved to dispose of the bloody paper wrapping at the soiled pot wash to drop the metal hotel pan. The crew member then proceeded to walk through the galley and crew working side of the buffet lines, without washing his hands with the cart that had visible blood soil. The crew member proceeded to open the cold store room 45 to acquire additional hamburgers. The inspector intervened and observed the crew member's hands and refrigerated door handle covered in hamburger blood. Management quickly instructed the crew member to wash his hands and called for the door handle and other tou-surfaces to be washed for instant sanitized. Covered in the hamburger blood? Wild combination of words. Not optimal, I think we can all agree. No. This violation is more generally applying to their medical surveillance reports.

The total number of passengers and total number of crew were not the totals at the beginning of the voyage as the totals on the AGE logs. First of all, Pobody's Nerfict. That's right. For example, the 24-hour report for the April 19th and 23rd Voyage had 1,4 crew while the log stated 1456, and the 24-hour report for the April 15th and 19th Voyage had 1,374 crew while the log stated 1,376. So a few ghost passengers aboard, which is fun. Maybe some people were, you know, just running from the front of the line up for the back before the counter got up there. That was probably it. This is another sort of general and medical

log violations here. The medical staff explained several times how passengers and crew needed to have three episodes of diarrhea or vomit plus one symptom to be a reportable case. Staff also explained that when the crew reported one diarrhea symptom, they would have the crew member isolated in the medical center to see if they produced another diarrhea episode. Watching through the glass. These are pretty stringent requirements. Not only do you have to be have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have three three three to have to have three to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three three to have three three to have three to have to have three three to have to have three the glass. These are pretty stringent requirements. Not only do you have to be blasting something out of one end or the other three times but you also have to have like just a wild card?

Yeah, one other symptom. You got to have an elective. And my teeth is all. Oh gracious. That case would not end in the AGE log as a reportable case. At the request, the inspector staff presented the reportable case definition they should follow per company procedures and it was the same as in the VSP operations manual. The inspector explained that even one diarrhea episode that is above normal to that individual can make them a reportable case. So for you, Theo, it's impossible to be a reportable case. Still finding the upper limit. I've got another medical one here from the waiting room in the medical room on

the on the the cruise ship. The hand washing station had no soap. Wonderful. And finally, this is a violation of their medical OPR. No idea what that stands for. The violation here is housekeeping records indicated the cleaning of vomit and fecal incidents in cabins in the medical center. For example, one, on April 23rd, vomit and fecal cleanups in two different cabins. Two, on April 21st, the cruise ships, the cro ship the cruise ship, and the, and the, the ship the ship the, and the ship the ship the ship the, and the ship the ship the, and the ship the, and the ship the, and the, and the c-the crush, and the crush, and the crush, and the crush, and the crue, the crush, the crush the crush the crush the crush the crush the cr of the cr of the crush the c. And the c. And the c. And the c. And the c. And the c. And, and the c. And, and the c. And, and the c. And, and the crue, the crue, the crue, the crue, the crue, the crue, the crues, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the crushe, the c in cabins in the medical center. For example, one, on April 23rd, vomit and fecal cleanups in two different cabins. Two, on April 21st, vomited in a cabin. Three, on April 16th, a vomit in the medical center. And four, on April 12th and 13th, vomits in the hospital. There was no documentation in the medical center of these incidents or medical follow-ups

with the individuals who became sick. and that, and that, and that, and that, and th, and th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thoom, th, th, thoom, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, theea, theaugh, thea, thea, theauuo tho tho thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, tho who became sick. And that's good? It's impossible to tell that. They didn't say whether it was good or bad. OPRP is operational prerequisite programs category. So yes, it's an attempt to control significant hazards. Has not worked in this case. No. No, it has not. So that's that for that report. Stay away from the MSC

C-side. Unless they want to sponsor the show, in which case. Yeah. Check out the MSC C-side. I hear they have a great galley. They have a great buffet on deck 16. I hear they have a buffet. We're actually recording this from the diarrhea isolation chamber while I work out how many more episodes we're going to have. Yeah, that's why we can't hear any echo in each other's microphones, because we're all in completely separate glass room. We're all in like the magneto prison for diarrhea. You're all tmatically sealed. It's very hygienic. It is now, but it wasn't before.

Yeah. And we're blasted mostly air in here, but some some liquid as well. I have another cruise-related story. Oh, another cruise-related story for you from Cruise Radio.net. Man air lifted from Carnival Cruise ship after ingesting battery. Yeah, well, like I said, you gotta fly close to the sun trying to get different, different new flavors. That's right. That is a cool trick though. Hey, you want to see the patron disappear? Smash cut to, woo, woo, woo, phoo, pt-ppup. A carnival cruise line passenger on Carnival Dream

was airlifted off the cruise ship for an unusual reason over the weekend. He ingested a battery. What, wom. I'm reading that tone into it, but it did seem like they were try to establish a like a jovial sort of, you know, we're having fun here tone. One gentleman had an oopsie on the boat. Coast Guard sector Houston Galveston watchstanders received a medevac request Saturday evening from a crew member on the ship saying that an 86-year-old passenger was experiencing gastro-intestinal issues and other side effects from

intestine battery. Who gave him a battery? I reckon if I was really drunk and 22 I could have been convinced to eat a battery to show up. You won't eat a D battery. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Fucking. I'm I could I could eat two, I could eat two. You know. 86 though. Have you learned nothing, sir? Yeah, you should have learned that way earlier. The incident occurred shortly after the ship had departed Galveston, Texas on its current eight-day Bahamas and Key West Voyage. Coast Guard watch stand is consulgant with a duty flight surgeon who recommended Medevac. Coast Guard Air Station, Houston, MH-65 Dolphin helicopter crew

launched to conduct the evacuation of the vessel was approximately 50 miles from Galveston. I believe the recommendation from the Medevac was, yeah, this old dude's tummy is all fucked up. Yeah. Get him out of it. We get a really big magnet. You can probably get it out of him real quick. Yeah, like the intestinators in the Christopher Lambere movie Fortress. Yeah, exactly like that. The helicopter crew successfully hoisted the passenger on board and transported him to the University of Texas Medical Branch in Galveston.

A coast card press release says that the passenger was the passenger was the passenger was the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger the passenger Guard press release says that the passengers are reported to be in stable condition with no other details given. There is also no information on how the guest ingested a battery in the first place or what type of battery it was. Those would have been my two questions. Those were how big was the battery and also how? How? How big and how? How big and how? He ingested a 9-volt battery because he thought it was a delicious biscuit. Were there's original. That's right. Finding something that looks like it might be a little bit tasty, and looking around to see if anybody is watching you and finding out that nobody is watching you and then just popping it in your mouth, hey, it's only natural. It's time for Nature Corner.

Country Roads, take me home to the place. I belong, Bultenissa, nation corner, rubber crab, Snipped my dear. This is a press release from the University of South Australia. That's right, they've got a university now. Kangaroo Island ants quote play dead and quote to avoid predators. That's kind of funny to picture. Like how how much acting are they doing? Well, I don't I don't think that'd be that much acting because they're not playing dying. Oh, yeah, sure. You. You know if it was like tens of thousands of

ants all doing individual death scenes. Oh! Oh! Yeah, peeling over. Tell my mother I loved her so much. I'll never make it back to Cork where I'm from. I'm an aunt. They're well known for their industrious work, just like the hosts of this podcast. But now, a species of ant on Kangaroo Island is also showing that it is skilled at playing dead, a behavior that University of South Australia researchers believe is a recorded world first, for ants. Yeah, first theater ants. Damn.

Accidentally discovered as researchers were checking pygmy possum and bat nest boxes on Kangaroo Island a colony of Polaracus femorata ants appeared to be dead until one moved all the other ones. Fuck. That's so good. Fucking Terry, come on. We spent all weekend rehearsing. Thousands of ads, and then one of them is just like, and we're good. Ah, shit.

You just. I fucked it again. Yeah, encountering all of this and hearing a, just an almost imperceptible grown. Published by CSIRO, this is the first time that a whole colony of ants has been recorded feigning death and the first record of the Polyracus femorata ant species for South Australia. Wildlife Ecologist, UniSA's associate Professor S. Topaet Petit says she was surprised to discover a colony of what appeared to be dead ants in one of the nest boxes. Yeah, I can see how that's... it'd be kind of odd. Do we know that it's just not that like her vibes are really bad?

They were trying to avoid her. Ah, fuck, lie down, lie down, lie down, pretend. See, with the dog parking there, it sounded like you were saying it to a dog, Theo. Yeah, it did. That's the magic of improvisation. Of sounds. Emergent podcasting. Quote. The mimicry was perfect, associate professor Petit says. How good is associate professor Petit. Little, that's such a delightful name.

Only a little. When we opened the box, we saw all these dead ants and then one fucking loser fuck up piece of shit moved slightly. Fired. End quote. And then one fucking loser fuck up piece of shit moved slightly. Fired. End quote. Yeah, the whole thing's off. You know how sometimes, I'm sorry, I'm addressing the listener directly here. You sometimes wonder whether you're like a dud,

that like everyone else in your life has their lives together and they're charming and they're loved, but that you're barely scrambling for purchase and that you're a bit of a letdown and you're a mess. Everyone else kind of like when they go to learn something, they pick it up reasonably quickly. Yeah. And like make progress with things, you're kind of like consistent way. Yeah. Yeah, it's a weird and everyone knows, yeah. So you have that in she opened the box in the middle of siesta time? Yeah, we're all very sleepy. Maybe they've been working hard all morning, as we said, they are an industrious species. Big carb lunch. Yep. Eleven am rolls around.

Oh, what if we all have a little kip? Then we get straight back to it, you know? Box opens up, one ant starts rubbing an eye, and suddenly they think they've found something special. You know? Nope. Caught him having a little snooze. Quote, in some of the boxes containing colonies of Polaratus Femarada, some individuals took

a while to stop moving and others didn't stop. The triggers for the behavior are difficult to understand. Associate Professor Petit says there is a lot to discover about this species. Polyraka's femurata is a beautiful arboreal ant that tends to be quite shy. Aw. But little else is known about its ecology or behavior. They're just a small bean. Yeah.

And also they're an ant. Yeah, most ants are pretty. Most of what we know about ants and apply it to this one as well. Yeah, little fuckers are always trying to carry crumbs. I know that much about them. I haven't even studied them and I can tell you right now, 90% of polyracus femorada are carrying big crumbs. Yeah, how the fuck did they even get in the house in the first place? Yeah, I mean they're pretty small.

That's true. They'll find a way. Quote, we have a relatively unknown world of ants under our feet and in the trees. Ants provide crucial ecosystem services and are part of a vital... and are a vital part of functional ecosystems on Kangaroo Island and elsewhere. It is very exciting that such an endearing species, such as Polyrakos Femarata, is living on Kangaroo Island and we look forward to finding out more about its ecology. I'm just gonna look at a picture of one of these bad boys. I bet it looks like an ant. Yeah I want to see if it's...

Well it looks like an ant. I mean I like how the front two-thirds of it are Matt Black, that's pretty cool and then that's about it, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Let me guess, six legs. Yeah, thorax, abdomen. The other part, little fealies. Is there a technical term for the head on an ant? It can't just be thorax abdomen and head. I think it's called ant. That can't be right. Noggin. Thorax abdomen, noggin. We have no doubt that other ants with similar death-faning behaviors will be discovered in Australia, but it is thrilling to be among the pioneers. Yep. Yeah. Uh, they've probably got ants in America. Yeah.

Oh shit. It's time for America watch. Sorry, I got, I got excited because, um, I saw that we were looking at my favorite Indiana news agency. Yeah. This comes to us from WANNE, the Wayne in Fort Wayne, Indiana. God, that's good. It just hits me in the perfect spot. Yeah, I don't feel like out of any of the ones we talk about on a regular basis, they managed to phonetically get the full name of the place. I mean it doesn't have the fort obviously, but it's still Wayne in Fort Wayne.

The closest I think is we get KPNX, which is for Phoenix, but that's still Copinix. Kapinix. Yeah, they've really, they've nailed this one. Copinix. Say that I'll lie to yourself, folks. From the Wayne in Indiana, too injured in Turkey hunting incident. So I'm immediately picturing, uh...

Hey, Ben, are you a big fan of Vin Diesel's Riddick films? Oh, I sure am. You know what I'm going to say is the third one, Riddick? Yeah, I believe that's true. Sounds right, right? Yeah. There's a point in the movie where the kind of dynamic shifts he has been pursued by mercenaries trying to capture him for a bounty and the tables turn

and suddenly the hunter becomes the other one. The hunter becomes the hunter. The hunty. The hunty. Yeah. That's what the turkey's doing in here is what I'm saying. It's turkey time. I took it down from trees. I'll let you read the story that we'll decide. Slash and throats. Indiana conservation officers are investigating a misidentification hunting accident. Uh-oh.

And Morgan Monroe State Forest. Yeah, and what they mean by that is, the hunters misidentified whether they were the hunter or the hunty. That's right. On May 6th, Sean Hooper was turkey hunting, very brave. When he misidentified two other hunters, he then fired upon them. Bang! They look pretty turkey-ish. That's the first thing you want to do when you hear a vaguely turkey-esque noise in the distance. Yeah. You only real

quick to pull that trigger. Yeah. Otherwise you might lose the turkey. Just instant, just instant off the cuff, you know. He then fired upon them resulting in those hunters Jessery McClintick. Jessery. Come on dog. Jessery McClintic which sounds like an antivirus software company from 1996 and Scott Pointer suffering a non-life-threatening injuries. The incident remains under investigation. How much investigation do you think they need? Yeah, I'll crack this one. Now it's done like this is like particularly... This sort of shit happens all the time in the US. That's why they have all these laws about, you know, wearing orange and blah blah blah blah blah. It's the fact that it's two guys. Like if you were,

you know, you're hanging out, you've done your turkey calls, you've sprayed the bushes with turkey piss to attract other turkeys or whatever, you've got your gun, you're sitting there, you've drunk 25 beers, and then you see something in the corner of your vision, you turn around, bam, you shoot it. Ah, fuck! That wasn't a turkey. That was Jessery McClintic and I've got him in the shoulder. You have heard like two noises and you've seen two things and you've got, pow, thou. Wait wait a second those were human men well God gave us two barrels Yeah

Do you reckon he's just like Clint Eastwood at it he's like like short succession hit both targets or he's hit one slowly lined up the other hit the second and then then be like, well, wait a damn second That's a man and also a man It's faring from both hips. Yeah He hits one and he's like that may not have been a turkey, but I've got to be sure. Bang. Wap or maybe maybe he had a shotgun. No witnesses. He had a shotgun. He had a shotgun. He had a shotgun. He had a shotgun. He had a shotgun. He had a shot. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a man. He had a man. He had a man. He had a man. He had a man. He had a man. He he. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He had a he. He had a he. He had a the the the he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he. He had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he had a he. He had a the the the the to be sure. Bang! Wap! Or maybe he had a shotgun. He had a shotgun.

He had a shotgun. And he popped off and just hit the one of them, you know? Oh, and it happened to get both with the, yeah, or... That was my initial impression. But also, okay, so let's look at the facts. So when they say what the misidentification was, they refer to it twice here. It was a misidentification hunting accident in the Morgan Monroro state forest, and he misidentified two other hunters. Doesn't say he misidentified them as turkeys.

No, he might have been like... He might have been like... Holy shit. That's the fucking, the, the, the, the, the mother of all turkeys. Or, he misidentified them as two dudes that he hates. Yeah. Holy fuck, that's the cocksucker brothers. That turkey looks just like Jessory McClintic. Bang.

I fucking love to shoot that turkey, bang! Can you imagine? Folks, if you, the listener, can think of someone in your life who you would love to come across in a forest and accidentally misidentifies the turkey, leading you to shoot them, do not write that in an email to us as if that person is killed in the future that can cause trouble for you. That will be a problem. You know, a trail of evidence. Better to do some self-actualizing on LinkedIn about people you may or may not like to end.

You know that? See you know that? CEO's mindset. wake up every day, turkey you're hunting. My goodness. Shoot two guys. Folks, we're in the business, the business of telling you when you've just listened to a whole episode of Punta Vista. And you have just listened to a whole episode of Punta Vista. Yeah. Business is booming. Yeah. Business is booming.

Well, see you next time. Bye. Bye. you