Boonta Vista - EPISODE 307: Don't Think About The Porcelain Man

Episode Date: July 30, 2023

Lucy, Andrew and Ben bring you: Vulgar transgressions at the Rotterdam summer carnival, bug soups, self-crashing F-150s, a $20,000 mouthful of milk, and Headline News. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Hello, this is your captain speaking. Thank you for choosing Buntavista Airlines for your flight BV 307 straight through to Brisbane. Yes, we've just hit our cruising altitude of about 35,000 feet. We have switched off the seatbelt sign, so you are afraid to move about the cabin, but I would advise keeping those seat belts fast and when you are seated as there's a few little bumps along the way. We might hit a bit of turbulence later as I am going to pull the yoke up and down side because I think it'll be pretty funny so yeah just stay seated as much as possible with me in the cockpit's first

officer Andrew and it's his first day in control of a Boeing 737 aircraft, so let's make him feel welcome. Now Andrew, I have had a Farmers Union ice coffee for breakfast, so I hope you're feeling confident today. Yeah, I'm feeling pretty good. I've had three sugar-free red balls and I have chewed and swallowed an entire packet of extra gum. Oh, perfect. Spearmint flavor, so I'm fresh. I'm really throw. Feeling jazzed up. That's nice.

I love that attitude. It's good attitude to have. Seeing a lot of sparkles in my periphery, which is nice. Kind of jazzes the whole day up, you know? It's a good day, it's a good day to be flying. Yeah and what did you say that stick in front of you was called? Yoke. That's weird. Like an egg. I'm hearing this for the first time. Yeah. Okay I'm gonna learn a lot of stuff today. Learning a lot on the job today. Work experience pilot. Also joining you today is your cabin manager. It's the lovely Ben. He'll be assisting you with your in-flight service. Now due to operational reasons we have the this this this the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the first. I I the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first to the first to to the first first the first to to to to to to to to the first the first the first first the first first the first first the first first the first the first first the first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first. I the first. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I th. I to th. I'm to the. I'm to be to the. I'm to be to be the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the first. I'm cabin manager. It's the lovely Ben. He'll be assisting you with your in-flight service. Now due to operational reasons we have run out of everything on the

menu except for 4X gold and grain waves. So please keep your credit cards handy. And we are, as I mentioned before, we are very much out of Farmers Union ice coffee. That is gone. So don't even ask for it. Ben, you've been a flight attendant for about 35 years now, my goodness, you know your way around a plane. So are you right to just pop in here with Andrew while I just use the facilities? Yes, and I just overheard you guys are calling that a yoke, like from the egg? Yeah, that's the craziest thing I've ever heard of my life. That's the talk of the plane. It's weird. I'm looking around like, where's the white? Where's the shell? What do we call them?

We should be writing this down. It should be a TV show. Or like it's a cabin manager and a co-pilot. And they're like, we're having fun. Having fun. You've got a little, got a bit of a connection to connection connection connection connection connection connection connection connection connection connection. A notepad out at the moment. So far what I have written on it is, plane equals big egg, question mark, question mark. Yeah. I'm gonna figure it out. I'm gonna figure it out. What is a plane if not a big egg? Yeah, persevering, that's right.

Generally if you if you drop it from a height, you're probably going to ruin the plane and everything inside it, much like an egg. Yeah, much mmm. Not sure sure the similarities go from their example of that. Do you know they're baked, not fried? Grain waves. Grain waves. Yeah, just if anyone's like, oh, they've only got grain waves, well actually, they're better for you, so. Yeah. Who's eating a grain wave? Oh my God. I haven't eaten a grain wave? Oh my god. I think I... Who's eating them? I haven't eaten a grain wave in 10 years. I haven't eaten a grain wave since I ate a grain wave.

And I said that's just this shit sucks. Yeah, this is a biscuit that's lame. Oh I'm gonna come out. I'm gonna come out in defense with the humble grain wave. Oh. You turn 40 and all of a sudden you're like, you know what? They're baked. They're not fried. They're not fried. No, they're not getting me with that shit in the store. When they've got like those kinds of chips where they're like, hey, these ones are bad. Because there's all kinds. There's all kinds of pretending to be a chip chips. But you can't pull that are like sugar snap peas that they've just dropped in a deep

fryer or whatever yeah pee crisps I'll eat a pea crisp I'll eat a pea crisp they've like instantly they've done the the instant freezing thing with those yeah they've just exploded them somehow and that's good for you because that's good for you because somehow they've like removed the throwne. Absolutely all structural integrity and vitamins from the And that's good for you, because it's good for you, because somehow they've like removed absolutely all structural integrity and vitamins from the, from the pee? Just sucked them all out. They've decimated the cell walls of whatever made out of the pea.

Yeah. They look like that kind of state where, you know, a loved one's been vaporized in some side, kind of terrorizing bomb. Like I'm thinking, I'm thinking Sarah Connor's vision of being exploded by the, by the nukes in Terminator 2. That's what these peas are going through. You go to touch them and they just, they disintegrate, flow away in the breeze, and they're good for you, I think they're just not as bad for you. I don't usually care about that sort of shit. I don't like calorie counting whatever it feels very unhealthy but I have a very tendency to get a

mad case of robot hand when I am stoned where I will just eat if there is an going in yeah like literally I'll just realize I've been shoveling food into my mouth for 10 minutes and haven't noticed. So if I do that to an entire packet of chips, I'm ruining my own life. I need it to be one of those like horrible things where it's like, wow, cauliflower crisps. Nothing but vegetable. I'm like, all right, that looks like a ass. But it might not kill me if I keep doing this. I like a veggie chip. Oh, like a little veggie chip. All those are like extruded veggie straws.

Oh yeah, I don't mind those either. Like a veggie straw. Ben, if you've got the robot hand, what you've got to do brother, cut yourself off some carrot sticks, get a little horns going. I've got to fucking do that. That's a friend of the show, my friend Tim's method is he just has a bunch of sugar snap peas and some cherry tomatoes and then bam smashing those. Yep nice crisp apple you've got some something fresh some crunchy but also you will not find yourself going wait a minute that was a party bag sized package of Cheetos

they're all gone. They're all gone somehow I can't see them anywhere else in the room so. So, so I can't see them any the room. It was a party bag sized package of Cheetos. They're all gone. They're all gone somehow. I can't see them anywhere else in the room, so we'll only logically assume. It's just an health advice podcast now. We're doing health advice. It's just an inside out bag that looks like it's been thoroughly licked clean. And I am covered in crubs.

Who did that? Blaming the dog again. Blaming the dog. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. Lowy. L did that? Blaming the dog again. Louis, I can't believe you've done this. Why do I feel like shit as well also. Hey, did you come to this podcast to listen to three people in their 30s and 40s talk about healthy alternatives to chips? Or did you come to it to hear some god damn news? It's time for headline news. Man, every time I listen to that I get more and more into it. That little, the slide in there, that sounds so good. Don't have bums. Man, every time I listen to that, I get more and more into it.

That little, the slide? Thatthere, that sounds so good. Don't have bums. I have three headlines for you here. George's Big Peanut returns to roadside after Hurricane felled earlier guber. What? Uh-huh. That one's not real. You're thrown ones in there, one's not real. You're throwing ones in there that aren't real to mess with it. No, I would never do that. I've got to hear more about this guber. Yeah, the guba. The earlier

guber was felled. After the hurricane. Yeah, after the hurricane. But now... And that's why George's big peanut returns to roadside. Yeah, that's correct. Yeah, that's correct. And this th the the the the the the the the the the th the th the the th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that's that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the earlier. the earlier. the earlier. the earlier. the the earlier. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tuboober.oober.oober. tuboober. tuboober. tubooober. tubo good for the next hurricane. Hmm. Yep. So I'm to understand there was a big goober? Or was it just a regular goober a peanut? Well, it's unclear. Is it what? A goober is a peanut? Okay. Yes. They got a lot of like, um, it feels to me like America has a lot of regions in which they're living out the whole kind of three little pigs scenario over and over again. Yeah, I gotta make this out of something stronger this time. Yeah, the first goober was made out of fiberglass. And that was dog shit, because that hurricane just decimated it.

Yeah, then they replaced it with one made out of plywood. They were like, uh-oh, that was no good. Yeah, we all know the fable of the plywood, guber. Third little pig made his goobar out of bricks. I got another one here for you. Uh, fragments of Beethoven's skull found in drawer in California home. Whoa! But it was that, it was, it was that drawer where all like the half-used batteries are, your keys that you don't know what they're for. Yeah, a little bit of bone here. Oh, this looks like it might be from Beethoven.

Just popping it in your mouth and having a little taste. That's kind of Beethoven. It's looking at a map of Beethoven's skull and you've got your one little piece and you're like, oh? Is it? Huh. This is actually a really interesting story, but this is headline new. this is headline new so you're not going to hear it. Great Fudini, hungry Francis on treatment during Youngstown event. That's so identifiable.

I can't leave that way. I need to know what the Great Fudini is. No, you don't. Don't worry about it. All you need to know is that the Great Fudini was not treated well during Youngstown event. Yeah. Wow. People are asking questions. Why did you do that to the Great Foodini. that that that thenie that thenie thenie th. th. then. then. th. th. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. to thoom. to to thatheen. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to that that to to that to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the the thea the the the the the. could you treat food dini that way? The great foodie? The great foodini? He's not the regular foodini. No, it's a great foodini. I like that he's hungry for answers. That's nice and editorializing. I didn't even clock that. Yeah, that's good. Hey, um, can I pull back the curtain for a second? That's go on then. I just got to pull back the curtain for a second and air

a workplace dispute. Go on. Podcast or your actual job? Podcast? Oh no. Okay. Which is that I submitted a headline for headline news this week to Ben who completely ignored me and refused to put it on the list of headlines. In what manner did you submit it to me? Where did you send it? I put it in a group chat and I said I'm submitting a headline for headline news. I can read it if you if you permit me but if it doesn't meet your standards, I understand. Yeah, please read it out. Okay, Here's a headline I saw this week Avid search for missing Texas rodeo goat brings residents of a small rural county together Oh, that's very funny because I organically came across that story after you sent it to me. They've spent like

$20,000 dollars so far on incentives for the reward for fighting this goat and there's like people out there on horseback and on ATVs roaming the countryside looking for this one goat. The goat doesn't have a name, which is crazy to me that they're spending tens of thousands of dollars on it. Yeah, you know, goat. I think maybe the reason I didn't clock your post is because it was immediately followed by Theo Grandma posting, which is Viv Post. Yeah, about as good as our group chat gets. He has a grandma who's not very good at typing in the family group chat.

That's a source of endless entertainment. She is very old. Yeah, fantastically old. It seems like a wonderful woman though. Hey, you know, having a great time in there. Sometimes when you see something written in Dutch, you think, is that Dutch or is it just someone writing English and they're very bad at typing? It's time for's Quarter. Tell me, buddy. I'm from Holland. Isn't that beer?

Yeah. Yeah. This is... Of course, from Dutch News. N.L. No dirty dancing at this year's summer carnival in Ruddardam. You guys are too horny. Yeah. No fingering on the dance floor at this year's summer carnival in Rudderda'am, you guys are too horny. No fingering on the dance floor at this year's Summer Carnival. Why would I even go? What's the point? What's the point?

If I can't get fingered on the summer slurger float, what are we doing here? What's the fucking point? Lucy, really stroppily going into the bedroom regimented change out of her summer dress back into jeans. Struppely. Fuck this. Fuck this. Sick at its shit. Participants in this year's summer carnival street parade in Rotterdam will have to show some restraint in their dance routines,

the organizers have said. Last year's edition was marred by scarequote, vulgar, and scare quote, dance moves that have no place in the festival. Iva van der Weircht, director of Rotterdam Unlimited, Zoma Carnival, told broadcaster NOS. More like Rotterdam somewhat limited,

what? Yeah, because it was unlimited. Can you say that? More like Rotterdam somewhat limited summer carnival. What? Yeah, because it was unlimited. Can you say fuck? You'd let me get my dick out at the summer carnival. By vulgar dance, I'm picturing just like the start of Happy Gilmore. Like, just some thrusting, right? Yeah, I think that's, yeah, you'll see. Quite bubbling, in particular, where dancers rub up against each other's genitals

has been banned for being too provocative. Why is it called bubbling? Why are you calling it bubbling? That's weird. I am trying to see an example of this somewhere. I would really... Yeah. Well, computers show me bubbling. Do they like, yeah, what do they mean? What do they mean? Is it a specific thing? I'd? It's a specific thing? It? It's a? th? th? th? th? th? th? th. th? th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. to to to to to to to to the to to the the the. the the the. the. the. the. the. the. th computers like show me bubbling. Do they like, yeah, what do they mean? Is it a specific thing? Is it like? See, it looks like Wikipedia is disambiguating this as grinding. Yeah. It's just grinding. Okay. Maybe. Oh, no. Maybe not. Because Wikipedia says grinding. Also known as juking, freak dancing, or freaking. And then in parentheses, in the Caribbean, whining. Is a type of close partner dance. All right, I'm gonna need to do some more investigation into bubbling.

How dirty can it be really? So I feel like I've seen some really filthy dancing in my days. I've done some really filthy dancing in my days. It's true. Right, no I haven't. No? Never fingered somebody on a dance floor? Oh God you can't ask someone that question. Well I'm not hearing a no. Quote this is a family event for everyone including little children and we wanted to stay that way, Vandavade said. The organization said it received several complaints about offensive behavior over the years. Vandavate admitted the line between sexy and vulgar, so I'm smiling when I say sexy and I'm frowning when I said vulgar.

It's a thin one. Yeah, oh no. Whoa. Sexy! Woe! It's a thin one. Yeah, oh no. Whoa, yeah. Whoa, vulgar. Quote, you see two people dancing and it goes on forever and you think, what's going on there? What's it?

What's it? Wait a damn second. Hold on. They've been doing the same one move over and over and over again. I've been standing six feet away from a couple on the dance floor at a club for 18 minutes staring, standing standing stock still, watching them grinding against each other thinking, these guys are out of pocket. And for the first 12 minutes, I was nodding my head and going sexy. And for like six minutes and shake my head.

Volga. Volga, we turned a corner. That's just such an incredible sentence. You see two people dancing, it goes on forever and you think, what's going on there? Very, very alien landing on earth and trying to understand our culture's thing to say. What on earth? Now what could this be?

It's not as if shaking your bum will land you in jail. We're just appealing to people's sensual decency, she said. Are they trying to just, they're just badding dry-humping, right? Is this like pride? like a Mardi-grass situation or just, thiiiiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, or just, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, toe, toe, toe, to to to to to say to say thi, to say to say to say to say to say, what to say, what to say to say, what to say, what to say, what to say, what to say, what to say, what to say, what to say, what, to say. What, to say. What, to say. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi. What, thi-s. What, thi-s. What, thi-s. What, thi-a, thi. What, what, what, on, on, on? What, on, on? What, on? What, are thi. What, are thihumping, right? Is this like pride? Like a Mardi Gras situation or just a carnival? I think it's like a carnival style thing. Okay. There was a lot of people in like those very sexy sort of like Brazilian

carnival style outfits in the photos that I saw. But imagine Dutch people in those. Vulgar. Vulgar. Right. That's the sexy and vulgar one. Brazilian? Sexy. Bulg.

Vulgar. Just not finding anything about what, like, what is bubbling that looks like any kind of sexy dancing in any way. There's a lot of, like, it seems like there is a style of music. Yeah, like an electronic music style. Yeah, maybe, like, um, like, um. Um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. thu. thu. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th- th- th- th-uh. D-uh. th-uh. th-uh. D-d. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th-uh, th-uh, th-a. th-a. th-a. th-a. th-a. th-uh, thu. thu. thu-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-vu-vu. thu-uh-vu-s-s. thu-s. thu-s. thu-s. there is a style of music. Yeah like an electronic music style. Yeah maybe like and particularly it makes me think of like when we had all that stupid shit going like the Melbourne Shuffle and Shuffling and stuff like that you know it seems like that kind of thing bubbling hard freestyle on YouTube

by Select a J-Mix. Oh, you know? It just sounds like it's grinding your butt up against somebody. Yeah. Or just legal, perfectly legal. Or this article from The Wire about Dutch Bubbling as like a style of, as a style of electronic music. If you're one of our three or four Dutch listeners, can you send us a video of you bubbling with your partner? Just so we know. So we can say either sexy or

vulgar. Vulgar. I guess I'm looking at this video and it just looks like a European girl doing twirking, you know, as in what a European goal would think twooking is. Oh, damning. Take that in Europe. Lucy, I'm going to need you to just pop this video on in the background for yourself. It's, um, yeah, keep talking. Yeah, and the same way that when Europeans are doing American culture And it's and it's not quite right, you know

We've we've got dancing at home, and then you look at the dancing at home that looks like this. It's a bit I don't know what's going on there. The City Council has also banned supermarkets and local shops from selling Cooled alcoholic drinks during the two-day festival because people are ignoring the ban on drinking alcohol on the streets. Now Ben, how do you feel about that? I feel like people have, you know how sometimes there are just things that happen. There's a special occasion and everyone just turns a blind eye to what the normal rules are. It's a street party. It's a lovely summer day. It's into your local spa, spa, spa, I think that's five days. Over there, yeah, yeah. And you go, oh, I'm going to get a delicious hoe garden, ice cold from the fridge and I'm just going to walk out and I'm going to walk along next the parade, looking at various dance moves and going, vulgar, vulgar.

Volga, I I see. Yeah. Doing a big spit take with my beer all over the back of the heads of the people in front of me. You see how vulgar that was? Just checking it off like a list. Sexy, sexy, sexy, sexy, sexy, vulgar. So you can't drink. So you can't drink.

You can't finger, you can't bubble. What's the point? What's the point? What's left? Get a tiny little bit of visible pre-com on the front of your Cheetos. I'm drinking a he-huddin. What is the fucking point? What's it for? Who is this for?

Yeah, you know? Who is it for now? It sounds like it might be for children. Now Ben, you've got me imagining the city council inspectors with clipboards either side of the road, while the parade goes past. Volga, vulgar. Sexy, sexy, sexy, vulgar. Every year, more vulgar. Both sexy. Yeah, vulgar dancing is up 15% year on year. Police will be around to check on this in a quote, coaching manner. Dancing is up 15% year on year. Police will be around to check on this in a quote, coaching manner, local broadcaster Reymond said. Hey, how we don't do this? Yeah.

Maybe they need to treat the police in a Dutch New Year's kind of manner when they do that, you know. Points and fireworks at them as they come over to look at you. You'll get a brown paper bag with a cylinder in it. You're up there with a half-pint can of beer frodding someone? You see a cop come? Wait a damn second. I got some heavy fireworks here. Take this, mother fuck, is I'm ready for when the fire department comes to. Take it all, you bastards down. So that was me getting to the end the end the end the end the end the the the the the the the the the the the thethat was me getting to the end of the front of. I'm... Yeah?

Yeah. Uh-huh. It's really hot and I've been day drinking in the sun from these increasingly warm cancer beer. So I'm feeling a little, uh, Vandervite said people who flout the new dancing rules will be warned and persistent dirty dancers may be banned from this or next year's carnival. You'll be forced to walk around the streets with a sign hung around your neck just says vulgar.

Valgur. Persistently vulgar dancer. Imagine getting banned because you're a persistent dirty dancer. Yeah, that was too sexy. You've gone over the line. You're never coming back. I live for this. Just watching that one person being like, ah, oh, uh, that, uh, sexy. Sure, I can see your erection through your tight white jeans. Oh, you know that's what they're wearing over there in Europe folks. The Rotterdam Zuma Carnival takes place this weekend on July 28th and 29th, or as of recording yesterday. Yeah, so we'll look into it to see if anyone was bad.

See who was or was not too horny or not horny enough. Yeah, they decide we report. That warning about dancing too sexy at the Rotterdam's summer carnival was something of a PSA from us and we have more of those in the PSA per segment. We've got two here. This first one is from WMTW in Maine. Women mowing their own way, I believe. Yeah. Trader Joe's announces two more recalls. Soup may contain insects and falafel may contain rocks.

Oh, we're trying to eat healthy and you guys are just making a big deal about everything. You know? Trader Joe's has alerted customers that two more products have been recalled due to possible foreign materials. We hate foreigners over here. Trader Joe has announced that the unexpected broccoli cheddar soup with used by dates. Yeah. It does what it says on the can.

It does. It very literally does. Use by dates from July 18th through September 15th have been recalled after a possibility that it may contain insects. What's the problem? Yeah. Well, I would put it to you that if you if you called it unexpected insects in your broccoli soup, then by the time you open it and put it in the bowl and warm it up and you're eating it, you're

thoroughly expecting the insects by that point. That's true. It's really going to ruin the name of the product. Yeah. Or take the insects out, in my opinion if the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the the in the the the the the the the the the the the the the thexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx. the product. the product. the product. the product. the product. the product. the product. the product. the product. the product. the the product. the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their thexxxxxxxxxxxxea. thea. thea. theauu. theau. theau. theauicic. throoo, thrificeauicic. thrificea of the product, or take the insects out, in my opinion, if the insects are already in there, I don't see what the problem is. So what's interesting here is that they use by dates on this unexpected broccoli cheddar soup, July 18th through to September 15th, 2023, this year. So some of them will already be out of date. Do you know how long it takes for tin soup to go out of thea???. the their thea. their tip. tip. their. tip. their. their. tip. thea. their, their, thea. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thin, th. th. th. thin, thin, thin, th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. I the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the in the the the the the the the the th. I th. th. th. th. I the, toda. toda. toda. toda. te in te in thea. I thea. I thea. thea. I the the the thin, the, takes for tin soup to go out of date? Is it tinned? Yeah, do you know that it's tinned or is it possibly in those sachets? It must be a sachet one, right? Otherwise it would be like 10 years old.

Yeah, surely. I'm turning into a used-by-date guy, right? Not in the, not in the traditional sense of, oh, like, the clock, the, the, oh, oh, oh, the, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the, the, oh, the, the, oh, th... th. It, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it. It. It's, it. It's, it, it, must, it, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must, must. It must, must. It must, it must, it sink. Like not that kind of thing. I'm not a baby. I'm a sniff-test guy. I don't don't tell me the numbers. Don't give me the dates. I don't give me the dates. I don't give a fuck. I'm going to smell that shit. Well where I've started paying attention to the dates is like, um, I'm eating a lot of dried legum the the thes thes thes thes thes thes tas tas tas tas tas tas tas tas tas tas tas tha tha tha tas. I tasks, tasks, I'm tasks, I'm tasks, I'm tha-I tha-I tasks, I'm tasks, don't tasks, don't tha- I'm don't tha- I don't the numbers. I don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the numbers, don't the the the the the tha. tha-I tha-I tha-I tha-a' tha-a'ea' tha-a'e'e'e'e' toda' today. today. today, don't t It's an incredible sentence. Yeah? I mean a lot of dried legumes. Nothing wrong with that. A lot of pulses lately. Nothing wrong with a dried, I'm trying, oh look, I don't want to list them all. I don't want to say every kind of bean and lentil and chick-pea. Is that what you want? Is that what the listener wants? Maybe a comedy movie showing an adult dinner party.

That's the line they would cut to halfway through. I've actually been eating a lot of pulses and legumes. Other persons like thinking about putting a gun in their mouth. But, but, because like, you get them in a store and it's very easy to just go, oh I assume that these are a shelf-stable thing forever. But then you look at the date and it's like, wait a minute, these went out of date, several years ago, thank you, local halal supermarket. And if you cook them when they're like really out of date, they just don't cook all the way or are too hard or don't taste as good, you know?

Gotta keep that shit in date. Same for putting stuff in the freezer. I've been freezing things and I'm like, I'm actually going to start respecting the idea that if you freeze meat, you should be using that meat within like a couple of months. Not coming back to it five years later. For sure, yeah. You were right that this is a, like it's a fridge ready, like it's a store-in-stable type thing. In the perishable section soup in a like plastic tub that's described, so it's Trader Joe's unexpected broccoli cheddar soup made with sharp cheddar cheese

and unexpected cheddar cheese. Hmm. I want to fucking talking about. I'd rather my cheese not be unexpected. Is that a brand of cheese or are they just, it's just another Americanism that we don't? Unexpected cheddar. Oh, trade-it-joseed cheddar looks like an aged cheddar.

At first bite, it tastes like an aged cheddar. Everything's in order so far, right? And then something entirely unexpected happens. You die. The smooth creaminess of the cheddar gives way to a tangy flavor and slightly crumbly texture. A subtle hint of salt crystallization is discovered and it begins to taste like an aged parmesan. Unexpected indeed! Says copy from the trader Joe's website.

What's this fucking Willy Wonka cheese? I don't want my cheese to transform half-wether. Even the cheese is made of cheese. I don't want my cheese flavor to transform as I'm consuming it. Yeah, I'm happy for my cheese to be roughly the same all the way through. Just steady cheese. I don't want my cheese to be like a sour patch kid. And if you're the, uh, if you're Claire, the listener of the show who is a professional

cheese monger, please, write it to tell that Trader Joe's in Canada. You probably wouldn't be eating Traded Joe's cheese, used to the finer things. But, um, it sounds weird. Anyway, that sounds like a load of shit. Yeah, that sounds like a load of fucking horse shit. Horse shit. In this cheese, they've combined. It's bugs in it. I'm just going to say it. I'm not throwning the same. I'm not thin thin throw. I'm not throw. I'm not throw. I'm not throw. I'm not throw. I'm not throw. I'm going throwing. I'm just going throwing. I'm just going throwing. I'm not throwing throwing thoomoomorrow. I'm just going tho' the the the the their. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm just. I'm the the the the the the the the the the their. I'm not. I'm not the the the the the the the the the the the the thrown. I'm not thrown. I'm not thrown. I'm going throwntrue. I'm going throwne. I'm going tro' tro' truste. I'm not true-s. I'm not truste. I don't true-I don't truste. I don't truste. I don't truste. I'm just truste. I'm not th them. I'm not buying it. I feel the same about like thoroughly washing like, you know, lettuces and stuff like that. I'm not getting the salad spinner out.

If there's some little bugs in there, that's some extra fiber for me. They get like, they get a Vikings funeral, you know, getting chewed up by a...Eatin' by a man. Yeah, imagine You Imagine getting chewed down by something the size of us comparatively, you know? It's like... The bikes are fine. Living in America made me crazy about washing vegetables though. Because... Because they got all that like salmonella, romi. Yeah, they're constantly, everyone over there,. I'm always getting Listeria outbreaks over here.

Although, look, this is a thing that I've been guilty of on the show before, and then I looked into the numbers, and we have higher rates of salmonella per person than America. That's fucked up. But hey, we don't have trichnosis. So we can have pigs ashimi. to their their their thia. thia. thia. thia. to have pigs. thia. thia. to have pigs. thia. to have pigs. thiae. thiae. to have thiae. to have thiae. to have to thi. to thi. to thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. We thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. This. This. This. This. This. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. We th. We thi. We thi. thi. We th. the. the. the. the. to to the. to to to the. to the. the. the. the. the. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. Yep. So, eat that. Dirt, Americans. We don't have trachidosis. Also, our chicken doesn't really have, our chicken is mostly fine. Yeah.

You can have chicken sashimi over here if you want it as well. And I can't be clear enough. I don't want to. Yeah, but you could. And you don't have to wash your eggs. Yeah. Or whatever it is. You don't have to... No, because Americans have their eggs pre-wash. You shouldn't. I don't know why they wash them, because then they have to be stored in the fridge.

Yeah. You don't have to wash an egg. It's nature's candy. Yeah. I watched the time. No. The fully cooked falafel has also been issued a recall after a possibility that may contain rocks. How cooked are the rocks? Also fully cooked. The fully cooked falafel recall was announced for the following states.

So keep an ear out for a few happen by freak chance to be in this handful of states. Alabama, Alaska, Colorado, Colorado, Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Iowa, Illinois, Georgia, Iowa, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Massachus, Illinois, Indiana, Indiana, Indiana, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Louisiana, and Wisconsin, Maryland, New York, New York, New York, New York, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, Tennessee, Texas, Virginia, Virginia, Vermont, Washington, said that both products have been removed from all stores and destroyed.

They got out the fucking Trader Joe's howitzer. Trader Joe's advised anyone who purchased these products to not eat them and to return them for a full refront. Boring. Hey, listening to this episode. A little spoonful of unexpected broccoli cheddar soup going into your mouth. I have to go back. I just did my big shop. Crunching down a big mouthful of rocks. I don't want to cause a fuss. I don't want to go to the counter and talk to the man and say, uh. I'll say this. I would be absolutely fine with having, you know, a handful of bugs pureed through my soup. That's no big deal. That's free protein to me. Yeah.

But the rocks thing, as somebody who has had a series of problems with their teeth over the years, that's bad. That's bad to me. Yeah, you don't want to be crunching their teats will give way immediately. Bugs before rocks every times. tip. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. Bugs. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. way immediately. Bugs before rocks every time. The recall for these products came just days after Trader Joe's announced two recalls for cookies that may contain rocks. What are you doing? How do you get rocks in there? Where are you making them in a salt mine? Underground?

Yeah. Is that where you make your cookies, Trader Joe's? In a cave? In a cave? Yeah. Down to the combined Trader Joe's bakery and soup factory and quarry. Yeah. You gotta diversify your business, you know? Guys, we need you to stop bringing the rocks in here. If you work in the quarry, do not enter the kitchen. Stay out.

The quarry workers are getting little snacks. They're coming in. They're picking little cookies off the line. Little bits of rocks falling in. I got another recall notice here, this one from the Associated Press. Ford recalls 870,000 F-150 pickups in U.S. because parking brakes can turn on unexpectedly.

Congratulations, your child killer 5,000 just got somehow even more deadly to human life. It's gonna say that's got to be one of those child killer trucks, right? Yeah, they're huge. And like the F-150 is the smallest of the F-series. Okay, I think, like, they're comparatively small compared to the F-250 and the F350, but they're also fucking huge. Stop driving those cars. They sell them over here now as well. Yeah, I'm gonna sound, I'm gonna go really grandpa moated here and say,

I fucking hate seeing these things on the street here. Yeah, every time I see someone, those like Dodge Rams over here as well, I'm sorry on my car being like, yeah, nice, nice car. Oh, my gosh. Not. I'm so angry I can't even talk. I wasn't want to be really passive aggressive to them, but then, you know, so it's not doing that. I'm just going to sit in my car.

But why do you have one, especially on these roadses, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our roads, our I'm trapped at the IGA car park because I can't see over your fucking car to tell if anyone's coming. You're looking for a car park and you're driving fucking that thing. Yeah. You're only hurting yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now, I was in a, I pulled into a car park somewhere, like, you know, just a smaller car park out the front of a local shops kind of thing and like three of the cars were Dodge Rams and I was like

Stop everybody pause stop that shit Yeah, we live on a street with a school and at school pickup time. It's like just it's Dodge Rams just filling up the fucking street parking out driveway. Whatever happened to just having a 1997 dual cab highlux, you know, the perfect size of car. If you need a Ute, that's perfect. Why do you need the other one? Yeah, why do you need a big one when you can just get like a normal size one? They have the same amount of trace space, possibly more. Ooh. I'm sick of shit. This podcast is now called I'm sick of this podcast is now called I'm sick of this shit and we talk about all the stuff that we're done with. We got a, whatever happened to regular coffee.

I got a recall notice for my car the other day. And I went, oh and it was like fatal, bring your car back. And I was like, oh that's no good. And then I opened it up and had a look and it was like, there is an issue with your, it's got, you know, like the 360 degree cameras and all that jazz. And it's like, sometimes when you are reversing, the reverse camera will just kind of blink out and come back on for a second

or two. But I'm guessing long enough to back over a child. Yeah, I think that's the big concern is probably the child. Yeah, even though I assume that the camera itself is not like, the thiber. the camera itself is not like, the thing that beeps and also it has like the auto braking thing. So if you're gonna back into something and you're not slowing down, it just goes, ooh, let me put the brakes on for you. But yeah, I took it in and they went, all right, and it just disappeared into another room and came back out and said, okay, we've updated the firmware,

the brakes out of your car. The brakes are wrong. Not like these guys. No. The recall covers certain pickups from the 2021 through 2023 model years with single exhaust systems. Ford's F-series pickups are the top-selling vehicles in the US. Get a normal car, you freaks.

The company says in documents posted by government safety regulators Friday that a rear wiring bundle can come in contact with the rear axle housing that can chafe the wiring and cause a short circuit, which can turn on the parking brake without action from the driver increasing the risk for crash. Just cruising down the highway. Yeah, brakes come on. Bam. You're doing one of those like crazy videos where nothing is happening and then all of a sudden, like an entire car just comes hurdling through the air.

Everyone's like, what the hey? Drivers may see a parking brake warning light and a warning message on the dashboard. Ford says in documents that it has had 918 warranty claims and three field reports of wire chafing in North America. Of these, 299 indicated unexpected parking brake activation and 19 of these happened while the trucks were being driven. Company says doesn't know of any crashes or injuries caused by the problem. Dealers will inspect the rear wiring harness.

If protective tape is worn through, the harness will be replaced. If the tape isn't worn, dealers will install a protective tie strap and tape wrap. So sort that out. Yeah. Statistically speaking, if you're an American listening to this, you own an F-150. You might. And because Americans do, like they're all on these crazy weird car loans, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, if their, if their, if their, if their, if their, if their, if their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they're all on these crazy weird car loans for extremely expensive, very recent modern cars that get repossessed if you miss a payment for like a day. You probably have a current model car. I was listening to our friends over at Chavo Traphouse recently and they were talking about like just the American concept of the car dealer? How they were saying, like, you can't just buy a car.

Like, it's, that's one of the reasons that Tesla is unique over there, is that they have somehow managed to get themselves exempted from being able to sell direct to the consumer. Like, no one else can sell cars direct to the consumer. You have to do it through a third party car deal and you have to do it via their like arcane finance systems. Just another one of these things where you're just like, what the fuck is going on over there? Like everybody learning recently about how Americans can't like transfer money from their bank

account to another person's bank account? Can they not actually do that? No, not easily. I assume that like anything else, it's just the byproduct of industry lobbying to say let's make it harder to do anything that isn't just giving us your money. Yeah, and then for some reason you get a thousand apps called like Sprongo and Boople and Gossorps. Can you Boople me? Oh sorry, I've only got Sprongo. Yeah, I'm on Sprongo. Two of the people on these table are on Gisorps. One person's on Sprongo, one person's on Boople, and the other person doesn't have any digital money at all.

It's just cash under a mattress somewhere. So how we're going to figure out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their. But it's like I saw a Tick Tock a while ago, somebody working at a car dealer. And they were going around the car dealership and asking all the people who work there, what their car note is, or which is how Americans refer to, the repayments on your leased car. My car note.

And they're walking around and it's like this arms race shit where all these people like, oh yeah, I've got a 20, ero and I'm repaying like $2,100 a month on my car. Like what what if you just didn't do that? What if, what if you bought a 1997 dual cab high luxu and drove that around? What if you bought a Subaru Forrester 2003 from a guy on Facebook marketplace for $4,000 and then a couple weeks later after he's moved back to Canada you find out it needs several thousand dollars worth of work? What if you did that instead? Being prudent with your money. What if we invested in public transport infrastructure? Yes. What if you caught the bus? Light rail. Yeah. I think those are for Americans

psychologically they would need their bus to be bigger than the other buses on the road, leading to another like F-350 style arms race. How lethal is my bus to children? Because I want you catch the bus if it was the most lethal to toddlers. Yeah. Wow, this bus looks really aggressive and militaristic. I think actually, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the tho tho tho tho tho thoes those thoes tho- those those those those those those those those those those those those those those those those those those those those thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thi thi thi th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thoes, thoes, tho the the the the the the the the theeeeea thooes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes thoes the most lethal to toddlers. Yeah. Wow, this bus looks really aggressive and militaristic. I think actually, that's a really easy way to get to work. Refusing to take public transport unless it looks like the bus from Twisted Metal. Yeah. Hi everybody, it's me. It's Theo. Now I guarantee you I'm more afraid of recording this promo than you are ever listening to it, so hear me out. If you haven't already, maybe check out our Patreon.

It's a great way to support the show and it gives us the ability to actually dedicate time to this thing. You'll get all of our bonus episodes, it's over 300 extra episodes in total, and we'll set up a feed over there withto hear this ever again. You'll also get access to our Discord, which honestly is turned into a nice and funny place full of mostly normal people to hang out with. So that's Patreon.com slash Bunter Vista. Check it out. Hey, look, we make fun of Americans a lot just because they are insanely weird.

But hey, we've all got flaws. It's time for Po-Body's Nerfict. Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick, Tick- Pobody's Nerfix, no, no, Po-Body's Nerfict, no, Woopody's Nerfict, No, Woopsy, Daisy, hey, nobody's nerf'e, Dazy, yeah, the hippobody's nerfet. No, oh, this is sent into us by listener, Eva. From the CBC, drinking someone else's milk straight

from the jug costs BC Real Estate Agent $20,000. Hey, but if you get off at it, you know, I guess it's worth that much money. We're about to have a milk jug situation in here? This Canadian right? Oh my god, I didn't even fucking think about that. Yeah it is. We got a milk jugs. Oh, it's milk jugs. A British Columbia real estate agent has been fined 20,000 Canadian dollars, I assume.

After being caught on camera drinking milk straight out of the jug at a home he was showing Watching the footage vulgar frowny face That's such a funny thing to do just drinking some milk in this house Thirsty! It's thirsty work a consent order released by the BC Financial Services Authority last week said Mike Rose was alone in the home in Camloops BC in July last year as he waited for as he waited for the BC Financial Services Authority last week, said Mike Rose was alone in the home in Camloops, BC in July last year as he waited for his clients who were interested in buying the property. Rose went to the refrigerator to find water, to get out of the tap, come yeah.

Went to the refrigerator to find water according to the consent order, but instead swigged some milk straight from the container, which he then put back in the refrigerator. What's the crime? He didn't put any insects or rocks in there. The consent order, agreed by both the superintendent of real estate and Rose, said the owners of the home saw him drinking the milk when they reviewed footage from a surveillance camera then then confronted him about it two days later. Here's an idea. Don't put surveillance cameras on the inside your house. It's pretty weird.

Why are you surveilling yourself? Yeah, the fuck is wrong with you? The fuck is it's wrong with you. And also, like, why were you like, why were you reviewing the footage in the first place? That's pretty weird to you? Does this milk taste contaminated? Is there milk missing? Like, were you like, wait a second? There used to be 70 mils more milk in there. We need to review the tape.

Check the tape. Run that tape back for the last couple of days. They're sitting down watching all of it. Coming home and just inspecting the very faint pencil mark I've put on the was before I left the house like I do every time I leave the house. Now that's interesting because I taped a bit of hair to the side of the fridge door and that's been broken. I can't believe I'm going to defend a real estate agent but like you're being psycho right now. I mean he didn't have to fucking drink it out of the jug. No, no. I guess so. Like, but just have it's a cup. to just, but you. to just, but you, but you, but you, but you, but you, but you, but you, but you, but you, but, but, but, but, but, but, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to have, to to to the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, I the, I the, I the, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, the the the the the the the, the the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thr. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th to.a. th. to. thr-I. th. thr. th. Look, we're all agreeing that it's a fucked and weird thing to do. However, I would say, much like we were discussing this recently on the very podcast,

people putting ring cameras on their house, putting the doorbell cameras on and everything where it's like, the main thing people seem to do when they put a whole bunch of surveillance cameras on the outside and inside of their own properties th.. th th th th th th th th th th th their th th their th their th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the the the the theck thi the the thi's thi's thi's thi to thi thi thi thi the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to the the the th th th th th th th th to do when they put a whole bunch of surveillance cameras on the outside and inside of their own properties is induce psychic damage on themselves. There are things that you just would have been better off wondering about instead of knowing in life. Except the mystery. You know? You don't need to know about the guy that wears a blank porcelain face mask with no eye holes

in it that just stands looking at your front door between 3 a.m. and 3.30. He's not doing anything. He doesn't do anything. If you didn't know he existed, you wouldn't be bothered. Yeah, literally. He would be 100% better off. He doesn't know about the porcelain man. He can't hurt you. He doesn't do anything. He's not breathing? He's not even blinking. He's not doing anything. Let him be. Just leave him be. It's only hurting you to have hours and hours and hours of footage of the porcelain man,

staring into your home through your front door. Weren't you happier before you knew about the porcelain man? You've got the porcelain man, tho, the the whole, the to to ask, to ask, to ask, to ask, their, to their, to ask, their, to to their, their, their, to their, their, to their, to to to to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th..... We. Wea. Wea, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, tho, too, too, tooomorrow, tooananananananananananananananan, tooanananananan, tooanananan, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan got to ask yourself that. And it does, you know, the porcelain man was there the whole time. He's actually been there since you were a child. He's been there a whole time. Right up until you got the ring camera, you were perfectly happy. So whose fault is it's not the porcelain man's? He hasn't done anything. It's not my fault. Let us put this to you. th you. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the the the the the. the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. their. their their their thr. throwne. thro. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. things. thea. thean. thean. thean. Right. in your soup. You didn't need to know about somebody drinking your milk.

You didn't need to know about the porcelain man. Yeah. It's the official position of the Buntavista podcast that ignorance is indeed bliss. Yeah. You know, just don't think about the porcelain man. Chill the fuck out. Don't worry about it. Is he coming into the house? the house. Is you coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming you you you you you you you you you the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming coming. Is their their their coming. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their their. Is he. Is he. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is their. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Is. Is. Is their their. Is their. Is. Is. Is their..30 a.m. Anyway, mind your own business. Stay in the house. Interrupting you. Yeah. Interrupting what? Your peaceful sleep. You know?

And by putting in the surveillance camera and seeing the porcelain man, what have you ruined other than your own rest at night? Yes. Thank you. God. It's good to power. Oh goodness. Rose, who apologized for his actions, was told he wasn't welcome in the home and his clients replaced him in their purchase of the property. That's the worst thing you can do to a realtor. That's the single worst thing.

That's the only thing that matters to them. It's a sale. Yeah. Rose claims in the order that his behavior was out of character and he was quote, unusually dehydrated at the time because of a new medication, as well as being under quote considerable stress. He's just a small bean. This is so funny.

Such a North American phenomenon is that I'm on a new medication, so I've become completely insane. It's made me insane. I just switched to a different thing that I saw advertised on TV and it's it may be put my lips on all of your stuff in your fridge. Now it did say in the in the 25 minute long reading of side effects, uncontrollable dairy guzzling was one of the potential side effects. Mouth on jugs. Now you have some water, man. Yeah, just like get some water from the tap.

Why did you think the only other option was just like, I'm slurping from your, straight for your milk jug? Does Canada have the same problems as America where drinking out of the tap might be killing you? Is that a thing? I don't, well it's definitely a thing in some parts of America. I think Canada is somewhat close to being like a first world country, re-their water supply. But I don't know much about cam loops. I just don't know, yeah, I don't know if like, because to me, anywhere in like a capital city in Australia, you're just fine to drink water out of a tap, you know, not like, um, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you, if you're, if, if, if you're, if you, if, if, if, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, th. th. th... th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. thi, that, thi, that, is, that, is, is, thee, is, thee, thee, thee, thee, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, you're just fine to drink water out of a tap, you know, not like if you're out in particularly remote areas, they might be using bore water or whatever,

but generally speaking, you can get water out of a tap even if it tastes funky like it does in Brisbane. I mean it tastes not as nowhere as good as the Cambrot water, I will say that. So true, got that fresh fresh alpine juice So I'm just looking at the city of Camloops drinking water annual report 2021 It's it's like get let's dig into this. Let's dig in yeah. Let's do a deep dive. This is a 30 page document with a lot of graphs and numbers and the listener will wait while you peruse and and analyze and interpret for us. Yeah I was just really hoping that they would have a sort of just like a big thumbs-up or a thumbs-down. Yeah just like a it's grouse.

Oh fantastic. Yeah looking at this it looks great. Okay so no reason to not drink the tap water. Yeah what I was trying to determine here was because hethis, it looks great. Okay. So no reason to not drink the tap water. Yeah, what I was trying to determine here was, because he said, it says here, it states that Rose opened the fridge looking for water, but when he couldn't find any, he instead drank the milk. And I'm like, number one, water lives in the tap, try and drink it out of the water, drink it out of the water, or failing that, just get in the sink, drink it straight out of the tap. Keep a bottle on you, dude.

Have your own water bottle. If you're dangerously dehydrated. Yeah, get a clean canteen if you're switching medications, and you're going to become dangerously dehydrated. Maybe if you are a real estate agent and you're trying to maintain a slim figure you could get like kind of a kind of a camelback situation going under your suit jacket you know just a you could thread the thread the little straw thing through like your breast pocket so that you could just occasionally lean down. You're constantly sitting.

Have a little sip you know. I will say they've got less than one CFU per 100 milliliters fecal coliforms. Oh, okay. Yeah, which... So not enough, you say? The government of Canada drinking water quality guidelines say you want zero CFU per per 100 mill of fecal coliforms. So I don't know if there's a little wheel room there. So maybe you should have.

Vulgar. Vul have... vulgar. Vulgar. The homeowner, Liska Fullerton, said she is still upset by Rose's behavior. Shut up, your baby. I'm not. Oh, go drink the milk for my friend. Blah blah blah. Yeah. Fish baby. And she's glad the regulatory body did something about the incident.

It's just a little bit more than a slap on the wrist, which is good, she said. It's $20,000. That's $20,000. That's $20,000. How could he get it? I don't understand the legal route that he has been fined $20,000 for drinking from the milk jug. Yeah, get him. Hey, you drank out of my bag of milk, eh? Man.

Yeah, get him. It's definitely a fine that's going to put a little dent in him. That's, no, come on. I... It's very main-spirited. You're like, yeah, we've destroyed this guy. Look, there's a lot of people out there, I think, where like, I don't know. There are so many people out there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, there are so many people out there living free and easy lives, living good,

safe lives, and they need something to happen every now and then where they can pour all of their energy into it, going, this shouldn't have happened. Someone has to be held responsible for this and they're pointing at like a little scratch on their fender that wasn't there when they went in to do the groceries, you know? People just got to have something to hang their hat on. Imagine proudly telling people that you got somebody a $20,000 fine for drinking out of your milk jug, instead of just being like, that's weird. Hey, go, go tip that milk out. Yeah, I feel like the, like, I, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they're, they're, they're they're thi, they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they's they's they's they's they's th. they's they's th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thin. thi. thi. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. People just just just just just just just the like I mean obviously fuck this guy because he's a real estate agent when we hate those that's like they're not people

And you know obviously it's not you probably be careful with Spreading germs and shit especially now with COVID and stuff whatever really shouldn't have done this $20,000 seems insane. It seems like the end of the road should have been and then we got rid of that guy as our real estate agent He's no longer getting the commission for selling the house. Twenty grand is fucking bananas. I honestly think, I honestly think in most circumstances if you had actually pulled the guy up about it and said, hey, uh, do you drink our milk? And he went, oh my god. Oh, I'm so fucking embarrassed. That probably would have been about enough.

Oh, jeez. Ah, heck, I'm milky, Mike. You got me. Yeah, inflicting the psychic damage on the guy of knowing that he's been busted, doing something he just absolutely shouldn't have done. Oh my god, imagine. You could have columboed him. You're like, yeah, we have this buyer and it's all good, it's all said to go ahead, great, lovely talking to you Mike

and he's walked just out the front door, getting his keys out of his pocket. You're like, oh Mike, I forgot. One more thing. You drank my milk. I saw you. You drank my fucking milk. From my milk jug, where I put my bag of milk in. That's the jug that I put my bag of milk in for my family, and you drank it, Mike. It's my family's jug.

And you weren't going to say anything? Try to take the milk out of my family's mouth. Yeah, what we wouldn't know. And if you're unfamiliar with the Canadian idea the milk jug, go to Google Images and search for big milk jugs. They have these big... Such Canadian jugs. Milky jugs.

Yeah, and you get milk residue when the bottom, they start to smell, they smell like old milk. Yeah. I don't know, I continue to maintain that this is a real cell phone. If you had not installed surveillance cameras inside your house pointed at yourself? He wouldn't have known about Milky Mark. Yep, wouldn't be a problem for you. None of this would be an issue. Yeah. Don't look at the porcelain man.

Stop surveilling yourself. He was always going to have drunk the milk. And you would have always had drunk the milk after he drunk the milk, but now you know about it because you looked at the porcelain man. Hearing about the panopticon and going, oh, you think we could get one of those in? Can I get a home version of the panopto con? Yeah, by milk? Why have you got a fucking camera in your kitchen? Is it on the fridge?

Do you have a fridge cam? Maybe, maybe they got one that's fucked up. They're putting too much in fridges. I just want to fridge? You've seen this? They got they got the internet. They got LED panels. They're doing too much with friaggues. fridges. We have a recurring problem at the bar where we have fridges that are

just for storing kegs in so it's just a big double-door fridge that you can fit like 650-lea kegs in or whatever. All we need it to do is keep that thing at three degrees. That's it. Doesn't have to do anything fancy, we never have to change the temperature. It doesn't even really need to like circulate the air or anything. It just needs to keep six to nine kegs at three degrees. That's it. And you would think that would be like the easiest thing in the world for a fridge to do. But this fucking crazy expensive fridge a small picture of like a leg of lamb pops up on an

LED screen on the fridge and then it drops the temperature by 4 degrees, which is too cold for beer. Oh. So you come in and you'd be like, oh fuck, it's in meat mode again. Yeah. Keep your beer out of meat mode. It's bad. It's real fucking annoying. If it was just a dumb fridge that didn't have a meat mode,

didn't have options, this wouldn't happen. Friges don't need meat modes. Things don't need smarts in them. Stop putting smarts in stuff. Let he who has not spontaneously switched into meat mode cast the first time. Oh, my opinion. Switching into meat mode when I see those Canadian jacks.

Every time I've ever gone to the Polish club I've turned meat mode. Damn, these milk drugs got me in meat mode. Fullerton posted the surveillance footage to Facebook for some fucking reason. Fuck off. After the incident in July 2022, come on. And that's the answer for why you're putting surveillance cameras in your own house is you're hoping to get footage of someone. You're hoping to get footage of someone that you can yell at online.

Yeah, 100% you want like the fucking completely underpaid, overworked, over here, the Amazon guy who's delivering 20,000 packages a day. You want to see him accidentally kicking one of your pot plants while he's trying to run up the stairs and then posting it on Twitter and being like, let's kill this guy. If you see this guy, kill him. Hey, he dropped my package onto my porch from 15 centimeters from the ground. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I saw someone posted basically literally exactly that, right? They're like, I ordered a phone and then they did this. You like, you dropped it from like 10 centimeters. Yeah, I'm glad because everyone was replying being like, you're a fucking idiot. Yeah. Like it's also it's packaged. That's packaged. That's packaged. that. Was any of those things I'm just like, that just really to me reflects like a staggering ignorance of like how things get moved through the world? Yeah, it's so funny that something's come 12,000 kilometers in two days to get to your front doorstep and you're going to be like, well,

the last guy who held it kind of scuffed one of the quarters, like 40 people people were involved in getting this here and they were over-armed throwing it to each other. Yeah. Because they all had no time because none of them are paid correctly. It's another thing about ignorance. It's like, you wouldn't have known he he thrown. the porcelain man. broken. You would have opened it up and turned it on it would have worked. Don't look at him. Don't look at him. Just never look at him. Never look at him and it's fine. You were fine before

you looked at him. Now look at it, look at all the shit that's happening in your life since you saw him. Yeah? Yeah? Realty's drinking your milk. Yeah. Realty's drinking your milk. Male man's throwing time. Whose fault is that? At the time, Fullerton said she notified another real estate agent of Rose's brokerage, Royal LaPage Cameloupes, who notified management. Quote, when you have professionals in your home, you feel like you can trust them, she said, the person who had put cameras in her home to record other people in her home and then reviewed the footage. You don't trust shit.

You don't fucking trust anything. And I learned quite a lesson in this. The lesson is that your worst suspicions about people were right. And you should keep thinking the worst. Yeah. Shortly after the incident, July 2022, Rose wrote in a statement to CBZ News that his actions were quite unfortunate and uncharacteristic. It was just so parched. I was so thirsty from my

new medication. So parched. I had to get my lips on that jug. All I could think about was that jug in the fridge. That's got a cool jug in there. It said he would spend time considering his behavior and take action to prevent any similar missteps in the future. I love when people use the generic language of apology to describe something that makes no fucking sense. What take time and reflect? What are you talking about? What behavior I sip some milk? What procedures are you putting in place to the the the the to? to? to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th? thu thu thug? their their their their their their? their? their? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thucoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo the the the the the the the the the something that makes no fucking sense. What steps? What are you talking about? What behavior? I sip some milk.

What procedures are you putting in place to ensure this never happens again? He's listening and learning. He's taking a course on respect. Yeah, how long do you really have to think about this one for, to pinpoint exactly where the wheels came off? Yeah. It could have been anything. Me and my team are going to sit down, analyze the footage. Yeah, they're going to bring in some consultants from fucking whatever to come and look at all this.

It's going to cost us $80,000. See, the problem here I think was that you were really thirsty. You drank milk from the jug in the problem here I think was that you were really thirsted, you drank milk from the jug in the fridge in your client's house. It turns out we're learning for the first time that they don't like that. Hmm. Quote, I have never done this kind of thing before, nor will I ever behave in this way again, said the statement.

This is, this is I," said the statement. This is so fucking stupid. This is, I guarantee you, the 457th milk jug this guy has drunk out of in a quiet towel. I will never get caught drinking your milk again. I will, however, continue drinking your juice, straight from the bottle. That's right. I'll never drink anyone's milk again, he said, smiling to himself. Rose, who was now working at a different brokerage, with, I assume, a more lenient policy on fluids and clients' houses, agreed to pay a disciplinary penalty of $20,000 to the authority for conduct unbecoming and $2,500 in enforcement expenses.

I can't believe this guy got a dishonorable discharge from his real estate firm. This is just like the real estate authority. They've got a thing for unbecoming conduct. That's so funny. The financial services authority? That's fucking amazing. He has 20 grand because I was being undignified. My duties is a realtor. The normally extremely dignified profession of, and not at all rent seeking profession of realtor. Oh boy. My goodness.

Fuck, that's so good. Thank you very much for sending that in. That is pure delight. I'm sure this is like not small news in Canada. This is probably daily headline news. That's Milky Mike. Oh, Milky Mike's listening to us. Oh, for fuck sake. I don't need to hear about this. I know, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, th. th. th, th, my, my, th, th, my, th, my, my, my, my, my, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. My, my, my, my good, my good, my, my good, my good, my good, my good, my good, my, my good, my, my, my good, my, my, my, my good, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, to to th. Oh, to to to to to thi. Oh, to to thi. Oh, th. Oh, to thi. Oh, to thoo-n. Oh, to tho-n. My goodness, thi. My goodness, thi. Oh, thi. Oh, they're like, that's Milky Mike. That's Milky Mike. The Canadians listening to us are just like, oh for fuck sake. I don't need to hear about this.

I know every detail of the Milky Mike story. I know the brand of jug. I know the brand of milk. I know the brand of fridge. I'm all over this. It's all anyone's talking about around the water cooler right next to it. That's right. Everyone holding their own milk jug and drinking out of it straight out of a little bit. We got a bit on a jug where it comes out of... The teat.

The teet. The teet. Yeah. It's not a spigot. It's not a... And if you know what that bit of a jug is called. Good for you. No, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't. th. And, don't. And, th, th, th, th, th, the the the the that, th. And, the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the, the. And, the. We. We. We're theat, the. Wea. Wea. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. Yeah, no, don't write it. Bontavista at Gmail. dot com. I think that was technically an episode of the podcast,

Buntavista. Hmm. Thank you so much for joining us. We had a lovely time having you here with us and especially if your partner was with you in the car on a long car ride, although my gut feeling is that although that may and does happen from time to time, very rarely you're getting to the final few minutes of the episode. Yeah. You like, it's getting switched off before then. Or you've been like, ah, we should probably stop for petrol. You've gone to survey.

Do you want to keep listening to that? No. Your partner says no way too fast. What about from tree to shining tree the episode of the podcast radio lab? We could listen to that instead. Really interesting, mycelium networks and trees very interesting. We should have very soon a new merch store going up on the internet with a couple of old favorites and a couple of new designs as well. We're really selling the sizzle on this store. It's been a long preamble. We're actually dealing with human beings to do this one.

Like we've had a sit-down meeting with a guy about it, which is awesome. Usually, you know, it's just like you just post shit to a website and they just put it on there and then they, it's drop shipping basically basically, th, th, th, the th, the th, the th, their, their, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, just post shit to a website and they just put it on there and then they It's drop shipping basically, but this is well previously previously the way that I was running the merch store Was that I would post a photo of a design I had done on Twitter and I'd say I need this on a shirt And then bots would reply having put so, you know, you could buy one and I guess someone somewhere would make it and profit from it and you'd get a?? all as well that ends well. I will say that some of those bots, the tech in those is shockingly good at like justifying the corners on an image of like you've taken a photo something that's managed to make it a flat square and then put it onto the shirt design quite well.

Ben is pro Skynet. I am pro the the the the the the the the the t t. T T-t t. T-s t. T-s t. T-s t. t. t. t. t. tie-s tie-s t. tie-s tie-s tie-s tie-s tie-s tie-s t-s t-s t-s teat-s teat-s teat teat the the the the the the the th-s th th-s th th-s th th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s th-s t te's te-s te-s te-s wooooo'-s wo'-s wo'-s woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo just noting that down. I am pro the t-shirt pots that steal every single image ever posted Twitter with the word shirt anywhere near it. Yeah we'll be putting that up soon. Yeah, sometime. Yeah, keep an eye out for that. Until then, stay safe out there. Don't look at the porcelain man. Don't think about the porcelain man. Don't think about the porcelain man. He is not bothering you. If you get up in the middle of the night, I don't think he can think.

Maybe you wake up in the middle of the night and you think of their own thiartan thiiii. You need a sip of milk out of the fridge. And you go down there and you take a big long swig from your own hard-earned milk that you don't want to share with anyone. Do yourself for favor. Don't look at the camera. Don't go over to the front door. Just have your sip of milk. Don't look at the porcelain man.

Don't look at the footage of the porcelain man standing behind you as you sip your milk. Don't record the porcelain man. And don't turn around. Bye. Bye. you to the to the to the to