Boonta Vista - EPISODE 309: Beancident At Bunge

Episode Date: August 12, 2023

Theo, Andrew, and Ben bring you: A ritual feast for seniors, the consequences of a failed ATM heist, the end of an illegal underwater wine operation, and a bean-centric hazmat situation. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Hello, welcome to Bonty Vista episode 309. I'm Theo. My career in life has somehow securitously led me to this, this strange, inexplicable, smooth, and literally alien chamber. I stand before an immense pain of glass, human on one side, alien on the other, within an enormous alien ship, which recently made its arrival upon earth. And... And... Huh?

You get it? It's really good. Subtle. You reckon they'd use what they would call it. And I'm tusk... And I... And I... I'm so tired.

This is your first episode of the podcast. I've fucked it. Welcome. Do we need a do-over? No, we don't do do-overs. No, we don't do-do-overs. And I'm tasked with... Do-do-do-do-overs. No, we don't do-do-overs. And I'm tasked with... Do-do-do-do- Jesus Christ. Now I'm tasked with making sense of the inky spurts of language the aliens are expelling within

their chamber. I have pages upon pages of furious notes, diagrams of their language with ejaculatory proclamations, like coupling, strength, dominance. However, will I come to complete this incredible task and know these unknowable creatures? Here with me, as I've become accustomed to, is Ben, his alien form swimming across from me. Unbeknownst to me, these aliens are not so unlike our own race, in that they've sent their most middling, cashed-up billionaires to space to make their first contact. Rancid of mind and shooting ink that proclaims

two dogs 69. It's Ben. Hey. Hey, buddy. What's up? Yeah, I don't know. What are you guys up to? e-meet you as well and great to connect to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to theionionionionionionionionionionionionionioners-upioners-upioners-uponaires-uponaires are you guys up to? Nice to e-meet you. Yeah, nice to e-meet you as well. And great to connect. I invented Heptopod Crypto. That's where I made. Hepto crypto is where I made all of my, sorry, Hepta, Crypto? Yeah, that's where I made all of my millions.

And I decided to get into To check out the rest of the stuff within our spiral arm of the galaxy and you guys have a real neat thing here And I think we can maybe set up a few business franchises, opportunities, deals, we're both about to become very rich. No idea what you're saying. Also with Ben in that impossible tax? There's a similarly wrong-headed dunce, who. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the to the theo theo theo theo theo theo theo the the thi in that impossible tank, there's a similarly wrong-headed dunce who has somehow floated to the top of the alien cased system. He's making the alien version of a Chuck Norris joke 15 years after its cultural currency, deafening silence. It's Andrew. I don't know what you're saying in there, but I do have the words epic bacon written down on my pad, which makes no sense to me whatsoever. Is this important to you to say, is this important? I invented drop shipping.

Heptor drop shipping, yeah. Yeah. As you know, Theo, I just re-read Embassy Town, my copy of Embassy Town, that I'd loan to you, not your copy of Emissie Town that I still had. Well, it's sort of our copy now, you know. Yeah, your pages, my bookmark. Yeah, it's going to be ugly if this podcast ever breaks up. Yeah, I'm gonna be fighting over this one. Want that fucking Jetstar ticket back. Going to mediators. I was just, I was thinking about very ham-handed references.

There's a bit in Embassy Town where, you know, he's a very smart man. Yeah, it kind of seems above him to make a sort of one-to-one link to our own reality. Yeah, like a sort of bad, almost pun, where he references, there's a part in the third act where they're watching footage of the hosts attacking, and they're watching the night of the living dead, because they're going back through old earth media. But the way that he says what they're watching is like, oh, some black and white people in a house are being attacked by some very sick people,

possibly of Georgian or Roman origin, because it's George Romero. I read that like three times. I was like, what? You can't be. I compelled you to do this. Why did you put that in there? It's this weird frustrating thing that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we kind that we're that we kind that we kind that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. the. they're kind they're kind they're kind they're kind they're kind they're kind the. the. the. the. the. the. the. can't be. I've told you to do this. Why did you put that in there? It's this weird frustrating thing that we kind of let future armor get away with because you need cultural references, I think, in a show to give someone, well apparently you do, right? Where, yeah, all of the, um, all the references like 10,000 years in the future are to the period from 1970 to 20, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi in the future are to the period from 1970 through to 20 whatever year it is at the moment. Yeah, and conveniently for me, it's the time I live in. It's right there, yeah.

Because if all of the references were from 1890 to 1920, I would be completely lost. I'd maybe recognize a few of the film titles, but otherwise popular culture, books. They're like super into the Ch th, 70 70 70 to to to to to th, to to to th, th, to th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thirty thirty, thirty, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, to 20, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, the thi, the the the the the the, the, the, the the, the, the the, theeeee, theee an theeee an the an the an the, the, the, titles, but otherwise popular culture books. They're like super into the Charleston. That's right. Episode 4, the year of 40,000. That's a novel idea. But I guess it's going to be kind of inscrutable in 50 years time, watching stuff watching stuff depicting 3,000 years in the future, a thousand years I guess in Futrahm's

case. three thousand years in the future, well a thousand years I guess in Futurams case, that only talks about stuff from, you know, Zoomers will be watching it being like, that's great, who are the beastie boys? Who's child to goal? And why is his head in a tank? I guess you could say that these things are very regional to a period of time, like a region of time. Jesus. That's specific to a region of time. It's time to check into some things that are specific to a region of that other dimension, space.

It's time for regional bullshit. Uh-huh. Regional bullshit. Every little town has got their own bullshit. Regional bullshit. Every little town has just got to have it. This is a sponsored post from Homestead Assisted Living in East Idaho News. This is so specific. Yeah, so we've actually covered this twice before. We've covered this once just using the headline from one of their stories about the seniors

going fescent hunting. And then we did an article in full in the episode get a job at a Michael Hill jeweler and palm some jewelry that was about seniors going target shooting and I think I really enjoy these because it's nice to know you know the society doesn't care about senior citizens it's an uncomfortable truth but it's true we don. We don't, particularly in Western society where we sort of look more at the nuclear family, we tend to just sort of completely forget about our elders and I think it's so nice

that the people at Homestead assisted living are making sure that these people are having enriching lives. And they're giving them guns. And they're arming them frequently. We are, we re-watched midsummer recently for the first time since watching it. And what a wonderful picture. And I have to say, wife of the show, my wife, Eleanor, was really coming around on the, on the cult. Oh, on the, on the Adestupa? Oh, yeah, she was just like, wow, what a great idea. Jesus.

What, okay, now, I know, they're supposed to be a sort of somewhat, like, everything there's a little alien, right, in the movie, midsummer, right? Where... I think it's just European. Like I said, we can communicate with them through a pain of glass. Writing down on my whiteboard, hon, hon, hon, question. You've drawn a picture of mayonnaise going on to french fries. I don't understand. But I reckon we can modernize it, not just for our locality, but for our generation.

And what if you got a big lady with the Attisduper Hammer? And she just killed you once you reach the stage of 42. You skip the cliff jumping off thing entirely. You just go straight to the hammer. Yeah. Yeah. And then we don't have to walk up to the top of the cliff either. No, that's right. It's a long way for a old old, for a the old, for a the old, for a the the the the th, for, for, for, for, for a, for, for, for, for, for, for a, for a, for a, for a, for a, for a, for a, for a, for a, the the the the the the the the th, th. the the the the th. the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th.... th. th. th. thi. thi, the. the. theat, theat, theat., theat., too., thea., too., the., the. Just go and like try every single year after you turn like 30.

Come on. Come on. Come on. The big lady at a stoop me. Give me big bonkie. I guess I guess you know. I need it. I'm just saying that their culture doesn't have nursing homes that they shove their elderly people into out of sight out of mind. They got a big hammer. They face their grief head on and smash them with a big hammer. Yeah, you know.

Certainly a more financially kind of viable option. It's physically responsible. It is cheaper to get a big hammer. Yep. Hell get to if you can't find the first one. You can't find. You could just have like an annex on your house that your grandparents live in and then you like take care of them because they raised. Bunkie. This guy's not brave enough to bonkers grandparents. Okay. I didn't think that does a family have to do it? No they do it. No they've got a

they're all a family. They're all a family that's true. Especially that one guy is related to I think. I. I. I. No. No. No. No. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. It. I. It. It. It. It. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. they. the. the. they. they. to. the. the. to. the. the. the. the. they. they. they're. they. they're. they. They're all a family. That's true. Especially that one guy is related to I think. No, mostly himself, actually, yeah, no much. He's extra in the family. Yeah. It takes a village to pop someone's head with the big house. Everybody's doing it differently, I guess, and in East Idaho, local seniors get an adventurous dining experience with taste of the wild feast. It does sound a bit human sacrificey. Yeah to me that definitely sounds like they're eating man. It is time for the wild feast. Put it on your masks. A fool has come to East Idaho investigating a disappearance and by the end of the matter he's been chased through the forest.

Bunch of nude ravenous seniors, not far behind him. And they are armed as we've covered, and they've been practicing. Yeah, exactly. Getting ready for the wild feast. When you two decrepit to go on, they load you in the clay pigeon. Hurl up. It gets splattered midair with a 12 gauge. It's a way to go. God, there's so many good options.

The homestead assisted living, all capitalized there. The Homestead, again, foreboding name. Very feast at the Homestead. Led by the Prince. Welcome to the Homestead. Twelve elders enter, 11 elders leave. Very full. The Homestead assisted living hosted a one-of-a-kind

culinary event recently and thralling his residence with a unique and adventurous dining experience called Taste of the Wild Feast. I'm scared. Yeah. The highly anticipated feast, everybody's reached something of a frenzy if you will, by the time it's time to eat, features an array of exotic dishes prepared by our talented chefs, offering residents the chance to sample an assortment of unconventional flavors rarely found on traditional menus.

That's the most Hannibal Lecter sentence. That's exactly what he says before serving somebody's brains and liver to a high society snop. Our residents were invited to indulge in an array of wild delicacies including alligator, bear, porcupine, mountain lion, frogs, antelope, sycadier, elk, goose and more. And we all know what they mean by the man. Yeah, man. The more is man. The final dish.

What if they're all bad? I feel like we know which meats are good and bad at this point. That's why we have them. You're not. Crazy, desperate to try porcupine. I am not. Yeah. I don't think it's popping off.

But they get to the end of all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all the the end of all the th th th th th th th the th th th the th th th th tho out the final one which is like a big roasted nude glazed Theo with an apple in his mouth and his nuts completely smashed with a big hammer. Yeah, yeah, all right. I've seen, I've read Gravity's Rainbow. We all know how it goes. We all know how it goes. I've read Gravity's Rainbow. We all know how it goes. We all know how it goes. We all know how it goes. It's an incredible claim to make about Gravity's rainbow. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. We all know how it goes as an incredible claim to make about gravity's rainbow. I don't think even people have read it, no how it goes, but... Alas. And which I have. Yeah, so I've heard.

The event turned the homesteads dining hall into a haven for culinary explanation. A protected enclavelave if you will. The aroma of carefully seasoned and expertly prepared dishes filled the air, igniting anticipation and excitement among the slavering elderly residents. Come on, call it to boo. I need you to call it to boo. Tell me that the meat is forbidden. You'll never guess what taboo. Tell me that the meat is forbidden. You'll never guess what this one is. One of the highlights of the taste of the wild feast

was undoubtedly the citrus alligator tacos, which drew both intrigue and curiosity from the residents. Is that just a distinction without a difference? Yeah. Yeah. You're more intrigued or curious right now. What would you describe yourself as interested, perhaps? You know when you start getting to the portion of the eye test, where you can't really tell the difference between like the changes they're making?

Intrigued, curious. Intrigue. Can I, can you put peaked in there? Another dish that peaked everyone's interest? Here you go, the next sentence. Goodness sake. Was the porcupine, which was slow-roasted to perfection. That one's probably, I guess, in the eye of the beholder.

The resulting in a melt-in-your-mouthed texture that impressed even the most discerning palates. Are the most discerning palates eating slow-roasted porcupine at the homestead assisted living? I just cannot get over how these are written. These are feverish. Insane. Like, um, you know in the, is it from the 80s? The, the,

the version of the Witch's, the Roll Dial book. Yeah, yeah. The one with, um, what's the name? It's great. Angelica Houston. That's the one. The, the scene in that where they like close the door on the witch conference and then they all get eyes on a little boy.

And they all start going, oh, and clambering toward him with their hands out, you know, wigs coming off, wild excitement in their eyes. That's what I'm picturing here. Have not seen it. Oh, it's great. That's a very formative scarring experience for many children watching that movie because it goes, like as soon as it gets to the point where all of the witches are revealing themselves, it's like an Avon conference kind of thing, you know, that's the vibe on it. And then they say, all right, now we're not to be disturbed, and they close and lock the doors and all of these witches pull their, pull their

wigs off, expose their disgusting craniums, their warts and everything but the entire thing is done in this really like feverish way with a with like a what's the kind of lens I'm thinking of, Ben, like a, like a, like a wide angle kind of. Yeah, lots of like, barreling on it. There's lots of weird Dutch angles. It's very like, something insane is happening. Any cackling going on. There's some cackling, yeah, some screeching. Adventurous eaters, revelled in the opportunity to try the mountain lion

served a rich source that expertly complimented the meat's unique taste. Do you mean like disguised? By complimented do you mean like completely covered? What's wrong with a nice Ruben? Yeah, Mountain Lion Ruben. Now we're talking. No, no, no. Delicious porkcopine rubin.

Porcupine Italian beef sandwich. Chef's just got his entire hand wrapped up with a bloodstained porcupine porcupine. I think it's better like the porcupine. According to Peterson's Hunting.com, quote, the most common description I hear of both Mountain Lion and Bobcat is that it tastes like lean pork, and it does. The flavor is mild, almost bland as far as game meat goes.

Now, have we got an easier way to get a meat that tastes like pork? No. Takes not there yet. To then smother in a heavy sauce. God damn. The frog legs, delicately seasoned and crisp to perfection, muh, were also hit among attendees, offering a delightful contrast in flavors and textures.

So it didn't taste like it mouth felt? There was a contrast between the texture and the taste, so you'd go, oh, it's crunchy, but it doesn't taste crunchy. Yeah, but texture is 80% of taste. Yes, that's right. That's why if you've got a cold, you can't detect texture texture texture texture txxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. Yes, that's right. That's why if you've got a cold you can't detect texture. Yeah. For those seeking a taste of the untamed wild... Wilderness, for those seeking a taste of the untamed wilderness, the antelope, Sidcadier, elk, and goose dishes provided a variety of mouth watering options. This person was riding this just before lunch, weren't they? So fucking ready to get it.

1145, the hungriest they've ever been in their life. Just in a little too much of a hurry that morning. You know, their boss has told them they've got to be back in the office two days a week. They forgot about it this morning. Usually leave themselves their their their their their their too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too much tooiiia too much too much tooomususus. too much too much tooing tooing tooing tooing too much too much too much too much too much too much too much too much too much too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too too toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too.a. too.a. too. too. toe. toe. toe. too toe. to be back in the office two days a week. They forgot about it this morning. Usually leave themselves enough time to make some eggs. Kind of a bit too used to being able to cook eggs every morning. They didn't really want a bowl of cereal, so they rushed out of the house without eating. Yep, didn't have time.

1145, thinking about eating that goose, you know. Each dish showcased the natural flavors of these animals, demonstrating the culinary team's dedication to crafting authentic and memorable experiences. And so this is not also not just a story about the restaurant that does this either. This is a story about specifically a bunch of old ducks going the... is this only for old people? No, I think this place exists for everyone, but this story is just about a group of seniors visiting it. Are we feeling like this is more like a, pardon me, are we feeling like this is more of a promoted thing in the newspaper? The assisted living place is saying,

hey, we'd like you to do another feature about how fucking sick it is to live. That's what it is. They do like one of these a month or whatever. We're gonna craft you a memorable experience. They're written by the homestead as well. So it's not written by the homest. It's the homest. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the homest. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's this. It's th. It's th. It's this. It's this. It's this. It's this. It's th. It's this. It's a this is more. It's this is more. It's this is more. It's this is more. It's this is more. It's this is more. It's this is more. It's is more. It's is more. It's is more. It's is. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's the home. It's the home. It's the home. It's a the home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's more. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a home. It's a whatever. We're going to craft you a memorable experience. They're written by the homestead as well. So it's not written by the newspaper. It's written by... Let's put a lien or whatever on it on your house, whatever it is that we do, and you get to eat some cat or something. Yeah. You get to get mountain line lasagna. Yeah, yummy.

Yummy. Throughout the event, residents shared stories and laughter, creating a warm and vibrant atmosphere. Sounds like a, like the end of a Logan's run type situation. Yeah, putting on a fantastic feast for you all. We want you to remember all the great of a Logan's run type situation. Yeah. Putting on a fantastic feast for you all. We want you to remember all the great times. And then they start piping the gas in. I'm stuck on the culinary team's dedication to crafting authentic and memorable experiences.

Authentically what? Authentically, authentically... Oh, they don't skimp on the mountain lion. You think you're coming in there and you're getting some stray cat? It's really mountain lion, 100%. Yeah. Very strange. And how long are any of these people going to remember this experience? Well, you take those memories with you to heaven, so forever. All eternity.

Yeah. You can't take it with you when you go, except for the memories. The taste of the wild feast not only satisfied the resident's appetite for adventure, but also fostered a sense of community as they bonded over their shared experience of culinary exploration. Now after dinner it's time for the other kind of exploration. Yep. Which we've covered before that they're like exploring each other's bodies like 24 7. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Guys we need you to come out here and get on the coach for the wildlife experience dinner. Come on. You're like banging on bedroom doors. Come on, we're gonna be late.

Come on, come on. Who's never sucked a dick before? Don't make me get the hose. Get on the bus. The taste of the wild feast will undoubtedly be etched in the memories of its residents for years to come. This unique and daring event exemplifies the community's commitment to providing its residents with engaging and unforgettable experiences. I just, so the three events that we've talked about them doing so far, one was they got to hunt pheasant, one was they went to a target shooting range,

and the other is that they've eaten, like, game animals. Why are they all themed like this? Yeah, why is, is this the blood sports community? A rest haven? Take them to an art gallery or something. Take them like, to a pottery studio and let them make some beautiful vases for the day or something. Strap them in to the Scooby-Doo roller coaster once it's repaired.

Are you tired of paying nothing for the same old superior quality free episodes of the Buntavista podcast? Do you want less politics and more content about diarrhea, or animals gone wild? You're tired of skipping through those hours upon hours of paid product placement for Mark Wahlberg Film Shooter. Well, boy, do I have the offer of a lifetime for you. That's right, for just five US dollars a month. You too can be a premium VIP member of the Buntavista Patreon. That's right, just five US dollars for all of our bonus episodes.

That's over 300 hours of content from the hosts you know and definitely tolerate. I'll even throw in access to our glamorous and exclusive discord server, where bizarre arguments only happen once or twice a week at most. Head to Patreon. to the next five minutes and I won't know because that's not my job, but you'll be enjoying the sweet satisfaction of supporting us and we will love you romantically for it. That's my promise to you." Absolutely baffling. I feel like they are specifically giving these seniors the skills and abilities to perhaps

commit a crime. Except for the food part, that doesn't really work into this at all, but that's fine. It's time for Crime Watch. Maybe the seniors are being armed and taught how to, how to fire weapons and they're gonna start like shooting animals out of hunting season without the appropriate tax. Maybe that's a crap. That, yeah, that would be. Yes.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We all feel good about that. This comes to us from KCRA, the Cochra, in Sacramento, California. Really close saying, Sacramento County wouldn't have been right. No, it's in Sacramento County. So, they both would have been true. Truck crashes into stolen ATM that blocked roadway in Sacramento County. Oh there we go. Yep. An ATM that was stolen with a forklift fell onto a busy road in

Sacramento County and then was hit by a driver Wednesday morning, officials said. Whoopsy. It is all happening over there. Remember we were talking to Pat and we came in a realization, we live in a GTA-ass world. We just need to wake up to it. Yeah, I tried to make a GTA world stinger for this one this week actually, and I didn't end up finishing it. But, um, yeah, look forward to that maybe, a little bit of forward sizzle. Huh.

Sergeant Amar Gandhi, spokesperson for the Sacramento County Sheriff's Office, said someone stole the ATM from the safe credit union, not so safe now, on what avenue near Margaret Way around 6 a.m. on Wednesday, getting up early to steal an ATM. Rising garage. Yeah, well you don't want to steal an ATM. Rising Grudge. Yeah, well you don't want to get there to find out. Although I will also say not that early. Not super early, no, I would say like 3 a.m. is like the perfect, the witching hour.

Oh, that's the cat burglar hour. Yeah. I feel like that's the time where anyone in the area is going to be like what was that wild noise? Maybe someone else will go down and look into it. Yeah, I'm going back to sleep. Is it a foppish man in full black regalia? Devilishly stealing an ATM? 6 a.m. You're getting like joggers, the guy doing milk deliveries. Like there are people out at about. The guy opening up the bodega on the corner. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I I th. I I I th. I th. I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. I'm. I'm. I'm. Yeah. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I there are people out and about. The guy opening up the bodega on the corner. Yeah, exactly. One of those famous Sacramento bodegas.

That's them. Oh, they're exporting them. It's a franchise bodega. The California Highway Patrol was initially called to the scene after the driver of a pickup truck crashed into the ATM. Hey, someone left the scene after the driver of a pickup truck crashed into the ATM. Hey, someone left their ATM out here. CHB said the driver is not suspected to be involved in the incident. He was involved in that he crashed into an ATM that was on the road.

Was he just a useful idiot? Did it open the ATM exactly to the thieves plan? Gandhi said the suspect ripped the ATM from the safe credit union using a forklift. It's a common surname. All right there are lots of Gandy's out there. Grow up. The ATM fell off the forklift while it was on what avenue just feet away from the bank. Oh buddy you got so close you had the ATM in the palm of your forklift. You took a corner too fast because you didn't realize that having the steering wheels being on the back means you turn in a very, very tight circle and then, wish. You're gonna flung it off, is that what you think?

Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. It's probably tha tha tha tha they. It's going tha tha tha. It's going th. It's going th. It's going th. It's going th. It's going thi. It's going thi. It's going thi. It's going thi. It's going thi. It's thi. thi. It's going they're going thi. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're going they're going they're going they're going they're going they's they's going they's going the the the their their their their their their their their their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. the. too. to. too. the. the. the reckon? Yeah, it was probably lateral g's... Yeah. It's why it's important to have your, have your forklift certification. Yes, I was just about to ask. Go to Taf, do whatever you need to do. I was just about to ask do we that the culprit here was a forklift certified. No, no, no I'm forklift certified, that'd take it for me, and it's been getting only four feet away from the from the bank and dropping that. Are you forklift certified? No. Yeah. Have you driven a forklift before? No, but I have had to stand on the tines to unstrap my lunchbox that have been ceremoniously strapped to the ceiling of the warehouse where I worked.

Yeah, because I... Did you get pranked? Did you get hazed? I got extremely hazed. Yeah. I got a died. Do they do that to everyone their first week in the Dixie? No, I guess anyone that leaves their chicken yellow curry in the office on Friday evening.

Well you're just asking for it I guess. Yeah. Wait, what day was this happening? Monday morning, baby. Okay, so you weren't going to eat the lunchbox back? I mean, it's probably sort. It depends how many days it had been in the fridge before you bought it in, you know. Oh no, not in the fridge.

I left it on my desk. Right, so you weren't planning to eat the three-day old room temperature. Oh no, no, but it was a problem to everyone else in the office. So this actually seems more like justice than a prank. Yeah, sort of like, renegade justice just that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. that sort of like renegade justice meted out in the only way that they know through forklift. Yeah. So we're all agreeing you deserved it. Okay.

Quote, the forklift was recovered just down the street a little bit. So it had been separated. So at some point, I guess the bad guy. Come on. Jud judgmental there. Yeah, well, alleged. Innocent until proven guilty, you know. Yeah, we haven't established that there's actually a crime involved with stealing an ATM from the bank yet. That's right. Well, I've been moving an ATM, what, a couple of feet away from the bank? Okay. Still within their territory. Oh, if I pick up a pen from from from from from from from from from the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. their. thi. their. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the. the. the. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta. ta.g.g.a. ta.a.g.a.a.a.a.a. I. I.a. I. I's. I's. Or if I pick up a pen from the front desk and I move it

to one of those desks in the middle where you write out your deposits, is that stealing? Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Tell them. Bad guy in my ass. I guess the bad guy, quote unquote, took the forklift and was trying to drive it down to their getaway car and from there dumped the forklift as well..... as well. as well. as well. as well. So as well. So as well. So as well. So as well. So as well. So to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their. their. their. their. their their their. their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their their. to to to to to to to to to to to to their to took the forklift and was trying to drive it down to their getaway car and from there dumped the forklift as well. So I would like to know ideally what the what the getaway car was hopefully like a Toyota Hylux that you could sort of like how are you how are you can't pick it back up with the forklift how were youto maneuver it into a car? Surely you've got to reverse it into a van whose door kind of shuts very kind of like finally behind you to lock you up for the perfect getaway. Yeah, oh look, if someone bangs on the side and says, go,, go go yeah But the guy in the driving seats looking looking at a porno magazine Yeah, and then when he puts the porno magazine down he realizes the cops are right in front of Yeah, that's how it was gonna go. Yeah, but instead he was a little oopsie almost straight away. Yeah, Get forklift certified.

Get forklift certified. Maybe we've got to do like, you know how there's political organizations who will operate in America like changing people's brake lights for example so they don't get picked up. Yeah, yeah. To stop escalating interactions with the cops, yeah. We need some grassroots certification for for forklifts, I think. Yes. Get it going. Make real change. A stolen ATM in every pot. I think the ideal getaway vehicle here would have been to rent a moving truck, but one of the ones with the gate that comes down and then you can lower it onto there with the forklift. How much time is you reckon it's got to take to go up and down down all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. their. their. their. the the the te. te. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea.a. tea. tea.a. tha. tea. tea. tea. te down and then you can lower it onto there with the forklift. How much time is you reckon it's going to take to go up and down all the way?

Well someone from the bank's like, hey, hey come on. Quit it. Hey, guy just down the street from here. Put that back in the wall. Hey. Knock it off. Authorities are still working on reviewing surveillance video from the bank to come up with a good suspect description to release to the public. Sexy Catburg, well we already got that. The Federal Bureau of Investigation is also involved in the investigation, but Gandhi said that is standard protocol during a theft from a bank. Yeah, nothing weird. Don't worry about it. No stress.

No stress, guys. KCR3 spoke to Terry Sanchez, who said he was the person who hit the ATM with his truck when he was driving on what avenue, a little too proud. Yeah, I did it. I did it. Quote, I came around the turn. It was dark and I couldn't see it in the street and my truck hit it, Sanchez said.

It was just something you don't expect every day. Maybe one in ten days. Yeah. Does he say whether or not when he hit the ATM, all of the money inside kind of went up like a big puff and then floated down while children run out on the road trying to grab a little taste of that mula. Yeah, and to that 10 lane highway. The damage to Sanchez's truck was minor and he was able to drive away in it. Customers of the safe credit union are shocked.

Such a bold crime could be committed at the bank they use. I'd say attempted crime? Maybe. Yeah. And also, like, bank theft is probably going to happen at a bank. It doesn't come out of your account either. Like, they don't take the bill that's marked for you out of it and the bank goes, oh, sorry.

They took some of your their their their their their their their their their they they they they they they they they, they took some of your stuff. They took the bundle of cash labeled Craig's money. Unclutched those pearls. Bank manager coming out onto the street to address the crowd. Is there a Craig here? I have good news and bad news just for Craig. Rocky Marillo of North Highland said he does not know why someone would go to such lengths to steal an ATM. I think I... Gotta let you on a little secret about ATMs, buddy.

Money for me used to purchase goods and services. Now I know when I say ATM you're just picturing the outside of an ATM. But you'll never guess what's in the ATM's tummy. That screen's not even big enough to play video games on. Why would you want it? These parts are barely gonna fetch any money on the black market. I can't use this for shit. It's got Windows 2000 on it. And we end this piece with a quote from Rocky Marillo, who said, quote, that's crazy that is crazy because somebody

had the balls to steal a machine oh my god end quote thank you so much Rocky for your input this guy's what you can't go like what the fuck oh shit this is crazy these guys the guys are stealing money you can do that? It, what the fuck? Holy shit, this is crazy, these guys are stealing money. He could do that? Makes me think of, makes me think of it's always sunny in Philadelphia where the guys come barreling into the room and talking about how Mac got interviewed for the news and he was like, yeah, and I went off on him for like five minutes and said all this amazing stuff. And they have his little man on the street interview interview interview interview interview interview interview interview thuuuu, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thu, thu, thu, thu, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, tho, tho, th. He th, th. He, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he, he. He, he, he, he, he. He, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thi. He's thin, thi. He's thin, thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's th amazing stuff. And then they have his little man on the street interview in the show and it's just him going, yeah it was crazy and the end. And I feel like

that's the majority of man on the street interviews. You reckon Rocky had something to really had something to say about society. He was ready with a few comments on Robert F. Kennedy. Yeah. Sleepy Kennedy Jr. Yeah. Sleepy Joe Brandon. Yeah. And of course the cry... Oh, actually... I was going to make a joke.

But I... I have come to the realization that some of our jokes are repeatedly getting us flagged on Spotify. Oh yeah, we can't do it. For a certain type of misinformation about a certain kind of novel something, it turns out if you sarcastically say a bunch of times. And we're not going to say it now, that it's something from a something in somewhere.

And it's not so novel if you ask me. No. At this point, 2023. So I'm not going to say that, because apparently that would be some kind of crime. It's time for some more crime watch. Ben, play the much longer version of the Stinger. Yeah, 17 minute crime watch only screams. This comes to us from KYT, the kite in Santa Barbara, California. Santa Barbara commandeers and destroys illegally submerged wine bottles. Perpetrators accept plea deal. They have asked for and been granted a swift execution.

Santa Barbara County District Attorney's Office announced Wednesday that in accordance with a plea agreement it destroyed 2,000 bottles of wine and other alcohol illegally possessed for sale in connection with an illegal underwater wine aging and sale operation. There's so much in this world that we don't know. Have you ever heard of underwater aged wine before? Are you familiar with that as a concept? Is it no? Let me say just to start off, no. But also also am I correct in understanding, this is my guess.

My guess is that it's like artificially accelerating the aging process. Yeah, and we can't have that. For some reason. No, what if we were buying wine that wasn't as good as it said on the label? Can't have that. Or better? I don't think it would make that much of a difference. Like really the only factor that changes is temperature. That's it.

Like it's a sealed bottle of wine. But we haven't worked out how to change the temperature of things that aren't underwater. No, that's that's thue thue thuuuuuuu thu thu thu that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. thu. that's that's thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's not that's not that's not thi. that's not thi. thi. thi. thi. thea. theateateateathea. theateateateateathea. that's not that that that that that that that that that that's not underwater. No, that's true. That's right. Yeah. So, what's the deal? Ocean Fathoms, also known as 50 Fathoms, LLC, and its principles, Emanuel Azaretto and Todd Hahn, pled to three misdemeanor criminal charges, including a violation of the water code for illegally discharging material into the water of the United States, selling alcohol without a license and aiding and abetting investor fraud. None of these are real crimes. I wonder how many other people get charged with

illegally putting stuff into the water of the United States. Yeah, because it's bloody not Exxon, it's not mobile. It's not, you know, the other ones. Come on! BP famously put a bunch of oil in the ocean. Yeah, I think they got like a $50 fine for that one. Yeah, and they had to clean some of it up. Yeah, well we tried, but it's not sorry at some point. Is their apology not good enough for you, Theo?

Luckily those birds are soaking it all up. Yep. Everybody's happy. Everybody wins. Some sleek, well-oiled birds. They probably fly even faster now. Come on down and see the slipperiest birds on the Gulf Coast. If you catch one, you can keep it.

All right, so they put wine underwater because it's temperature controlled. Yeah, and it's a dark anaerobic environment, although I don't see how it being anaerobic would make a difference when the wine is already in a sealed bottle. Yeah, in the bottle kind of stops. If it was just sort of like sloshing around in there, that would probably be, make a difference. But it's not a humodour. Yeah. So it's, so what, it's a, what's the, not a humidore, a thermador? What's the? A cellar, I believe, for wine, generally? It's nature's wine cellar. No, I'm talking about the fridges frid frid frid frid frid frid frid frid frid frid frid frid fridges, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's not be that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that, that, that, that, that, that, generally. It's nature's wine cellar. No, I'm talking about the fridges that you put your wine in that are temperature controlled, you know ones. Yeah. So it's that, but you don't have to pay for the fridge or the electricity to run it.

That's right. You have to violate the water code, which sounds like a made-up thing that Yep. The alcohol was disposed of at one of Santa Barbara's wastewater treatment plants, and the associated glass bottles were transported for recycling. Dipping it right in there with the turns. Yep. Doop-doo. Sorry but this wine has to become slurry. It must become part.

It's going to Maine. It's going into the sludge bit. Please subscribe to Maine, it's going into the sludge pit. And if you want to know more about that, please subscribe to the bonus episodes and listen to it. Check out the bonus episodes. That was a good one. It was a good episode. We talked for about 45 minutes about diarrhea treatment. That's right.

But in a way that was good actually, you should check it out. I think. Yeah. I would be the guy down at the wastewater treatment plants with a peg on my nose doing a one for you, one for me system with the wine, I think. Santa Barbara County District Attorney's Office detail the beginning in 2017 Han and Nazareto began sinking crates of wine one mile off the coast of Santa Barbara without obtaining any required permits from the California Coastal Commission, nor the US Army Corps of Engineers. It's so funny to be like, these guys have taken a boat a mile offshore and a dumping crates of wine and the problem here is like, hey, you didn't get that permit?

What are you doing? Not... Have you even talked to the Army about that yet? that, yet that, yet that, yet that, yet, yet, yet, that, that, th th th th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the thi, their the, the, their their the, their their the, their, their their their, their their their, their, their per per per per per per per per per per per per their per their per their per their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their, their, their thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thea, tea, tea, teauiauiauiauiauiauiauiauiauia, tea, tea, thea, thi, thi, didn't get that permit? What are you doing? Not... Have you even talked to the army about that yet? This is fucking wild. Each crate was left on the sea floor for one year, just long enough for a reef ecosystem to develop in and on the crates and bottles, and then removed, sea Life and All, to be sold for as much as $500 a bottle, says the Santa Barbara County District Attorney's Office. Okay, right, and the problem will arrive at some point.

And you get a free crab with it? What's the problem? Yeah, you get a free crab, a couple of mollisks. Yeah. If you pop a barnacle off that wine bottle, it's yours, you get to keep it. Waiter, there's a mollusk on my wine. I can't think of what the punchline to that would be, but yeah. Yeah. You guys work on that at home. Thanks, The Yeah. The SBCDA's office alleged in their complaint that nearly every aspect of this business was conducted in violation of state or federal law.

That's so good. Just top to bottom, every component is a different crime. Unbelievable. Child labor to peel all the mollusks off. The Food Drug Administration considered the wine adulterated and not fit for human consumption due to potential contamination while submerged. Hey, you put that in our disgusting water that we're also punishing you for putting something in? Yeah. There might be wine in that wine.

The wine was also sold without any of the required federally approved labeling and Ocean Fathoms was selling the wine without an ABC alcohol sales permit and without a valid business license. Land of the free $500 clean skins of illegal wine that spent a year underwater. Very strange. Additionally, Santa Barbara County District Attorney's Office relay that the company was also collecting sales tax from its customers without ever paying those taxes to the state of California, that naughty boys. Ocean Fathoms also advertised that it was donating a portion of its profits to a local environmental non-profit. But no evidence of any donation was ever discovered that it was donating a portion of its profits to a local

environmental non-profit, but no evidence of any donation was ever discovered. That's so good, every part of it. The whole business is just scooping cream off the top. It's all cream. It's all cream. It's nothing else. It's just cream. But like, were they buying other people's wine? And then, or did they actually have like a Vintner involved in this in some point in

the process? You just want to say the word Vintner. I did, yeah. And now you've said it. How do you feel? Oh, Emmanuel Azareto's LinkedIn page is still up. Nice. Tremendous.

Oh, he founded 50 Fathoms Wine 9 years ago. Crazy. 50 Fathoms Wine Club produces non-commercial custom wines for our club members that are aged in the ocean for at least one year. Yeah, right. Fantastic. Says what it does on the tin. Yeah. Says what it does. That's what most labels do. They say what's in the tent. In addition to the destruction of the sunken inventory worth several hundred thousand dollars. Do you think we're getting the police street value thing here? Yeah, I mean if they're showing a wine that

wine is potentially worth $10,000 on the street. Police officers getting a tiny little bit of wine on their hands passing out. Stay with me, stay with me. He's got liver poisoning. Look. In addition to the destruction of the suncondimatory, the plea- theeeeee the the the the the the the the the the Stay with me! He's got liver poisoning. In addition to the destruction of the sunken inventory, the plea agreement also required

ocean fathoms as a reto be on probation. Can a company be on probation? You're on notice. Theo, I've got to, this is actually perfect for you, I think. So their claim about what it does to the wine is quite interesting actually. They say that the galvanic current produced by their specially designed cages and the salt slowly ionizes the wine, splitting the tannins and enhancing the wine using a natural electrolysis. Yeah, okay.

So the sea is zapping it, your wine's getting zapped by the sea? But it's in a bottle. You can't, a fucking bottle is an electrical, it's an electrical insulator. They're making the, they're making the water around the bars slightly, have a slight potential difference. Cool. Yeah. So that okay this is now a crime to me. Because they're lying about electricity. Lying about electricity. Now I care. We've got Mr. Electricity on the case. Santa Barbara County District Attorney John T. Savnoch said, This case involved individuals who operated with complete disregard for our consumer and environmental laws.

The California Coastal Commission referred the case to our consumer and elective environmental protection unit, and because of the broad scope of violations, we investigated with the help of five state and local agencies. This case highlights the importance of five state and local agencies. This case highlights the importance of our officers' relationship with outside agencies and it demonstrates our commitment to holding companies and individuals accountable for violating all types of consumer and environmental laws. Why this case? Just makes you go how many thousands of man hours went into this specific making sure these guys

didn't sell their 10 crates of wine or whatever. Fucking, uh, so this story went up yesterday, no today, sorry, this story is like less than 24 hours old, and they're active on their Instagram telling people, like, someone's message them, like, commented saying I'd love to be on the waiting list for your next bottle release, and they're saying, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thir Instagram telling people like someone's message them being like commented saying I'd love to be on the waiting list for your next bottle release and they're saying yep please email me and I'll let you the mailing list thanks. There is one comment on this entire fucking thread of someone saying you assholes should be in prison. Well you know that's just your opinion. Staying on their grind. Yeah they're really not letting it stop them. God damn.

Why should they? Oh, and that same person has replied to a post from a day earlier, saying the only wine you guys should be drinking is Pruno. Oh, yeah. That's more like it. Some people really, really against dipping some wine in the ocean. Oh wait, this guy sorry has replied to another poster of theirs from a day earlier. Good times. I hope you enjoy dumping your product in the ocean.

I hope you all go to prison and would love to see Azareto permanently deported. Wow, that's a bit taking on a tone to be honest. Yeah. Pipeline to fascism via dipping wine in the ocean. Good Lord, get a grip. I hope you are publicly executed. The ocean wine, minus the electricity part. And potentially the sales tax stuff, maybe.

Oh yeah, yeah, and the, I mean, defrauding that. Yeah, claiming to donate to charity and not doing that. Yeah. Some wine goes in the ocean, I don't give a fuck. What's a little- I don't think- Pull it out and sell it to some gullible people, if you're buying $500 wide and it gives you ocean madness. I don't care. That seems like a, a tip-for-tot situation-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-o-s-o-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s, that-s, maybe-a-s, maybe-a-a-a-ma-ma-ma-ma-fa-fa-ma-ma-me, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-se-se-se-se-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-si-a-si-a-fa-a-a- a tip-for-tot situation. A tip-for-tot situation. That's right. I've lost all of my aphorisms. They've gone. They've departed me. There's all sorts of wildlife that they could have hurt by dropping crates of wine randomly

into the sea, from the majestic sea cucumber all the way down to the beautiful sea bean. It's time to check in on the bean news of the world in what's been happening. Now I forgot to put the actual stinger in the soundboard, so instead we're getting the generic one. Yeah. Will I fix that in post? Maybe. Who knows? And it is important to note that we are on the sea bean diet.

That's right. Yummy. This comes to us from WANE, the Wayne in Indiana. Ah, back in the comforting arms of Wayne. That's right. We love wine. Evacuation order lifted in Decatur after soybean plant mishap. And a bean incident. An improper chemical mixture, the bunge

soybean processing plant in Decatur. For a bean to bunch. For the beaning at, that's right. Led to a gas release and the evacuation of employees at nearby businesses. Oopsies. Yeah, you get that with beans. Hey, we've all had an employee evacuation due to a gas release, you know what I'm saying? Guys? No.

Are you saying you fart so bad that they've had to clear your work out? Yes. The whole, multiple floors of the office, because once it gets into like the air conditioning intake. It's in the ducks? It's in the ducks. It's in the discoard about that. Someone shit their pants at work.

Will you know what this is about? Find out more on the discord. Okay. Around 8.25 p.m. Monday, the Decatur Fire Department said on its Facebook page, the evacuation order had been lifted. Quote, after a thorough investigation by Bunge officials and the Decatur Fire Department, the evacuation order is being lifted. People just walking around sniffing. I think it's okay. I think it's okay. Air quality on local streets were tested by an

independent environmental company hired by Bung and all tests deemed those areas safe from any chemical hazards. Good to know that the company hired by the company that did the thing says it's fine. Yeah. The initial evacuation was issued under an abundance of caution. If you live near Bungge... Bungence? Nobun abundance of caution. If you live near bunge... A bungence? An abundance of caution. If you live near bunge and are concerned about any irritations from the odors, you may want to consider sheltering elsewhere for the evening or seeking medical attention.

But we have confirmed it's not our fault or our problem. Police asked residents within a half mile of the plant to leave their homes. To cater in Allen County Fire officials, we're using drones to look to look to look to look to look to look to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the drones the drones the plant to leave their homes. To cater in Allen County fire officials were using drones to look over the area, and Fort Wayne hazmat units were at the scene as well. How do you reckon the drones are seeing? Like investigating a bad smell at the bean factory like it's fucking Chernobyl. Yeah, they're looking for smell lines, I think. Yeah, like green stink lines.

Or these are drones that are equipped with smellerscopes, which is fucking amazing. Dedicated sniffer drones. And do they have those? We'll never know. Does that technology exist? I remember when I was like 12 or 13 reading a conspiracy website saying that Area 51 was surrounded by smell scopes that that could smell people trying to sneak into the area. So maybe the technology does exist. Yeah. And you held onto that and you still believe that. Yes, 20 years later I'm still like, they probably got those smell of scopes at area 51. So they were using drones to look for stink lines. And Fort Wayne Hasmat units were at the scene as well. A chemist was also working with bunge officials at the scene.

My bunge chemistry is all fucked. What of his German is pronounced like, Bunger. Chemicals are used normally at the plant. That's so convincing, dude. No, we're using chemicals normally. It's funny no matter how you read that, whether they mean regularly they use chemicals to the plant, like, you're going to come across chemicals in your day-to-day life. Or just, they're used normally. They don't do it crazy shit.

They don't get an experimental with chemicals. We're just being normal. Just out here being normal. Chemicals are used normally at the plant and mixed every day, but a mixture was off Monday and caused a gas release, officials told the team from Wayne 15 at the scene. Officially, you know, sometimes you have an off day and you mix your soybean chemicals slightly wrong and you have to evacuate a one mile radius of a town in Indiana. It happens. How do you feel, Ben, when you're doing research for the show and you come across a story

that is bad smell at the bean factory? I feel, immediately drag research for the show and you come across a story that is bad smell at the bean factory and you immediately drag it into the notes like ecstatic I'm so happy and it's so not touching the ground. There's something very lovely about like fighting a story like this where it hasn't already had like headlines done by like vice or whatever where they make the joke obvious. This is just for us. This is for the people of Bunch and Decatur and for the listeners of Buntavista and no one else. And we're certainly not going to make the obvious jokes about a bad smell at a bean factory and Bunch.

No, that would be disgusting. We're just reporting the news. That's right. We report. You decide. Government doesn't want you to know the risks risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks the risks to know the risks to know the risks to know the risks to the risks to to the risks to to the risks the risks the risks to the the risks the risks the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to be to be toea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.e.e.e's right. We report. You decide. Government doesn't want you to know the risks of living near a soybean factory. Yeah. Officials believed the situation was manageable, but evacuated local businesses. During the afternoon evacuation, the Decatur Police Department said the Riverside Center was still available if individuals have no other place to go. Police were going door to door, notifying the public. Stinky!

Yeah, it's stinky. Get out. Leave now, it's stinky. There's been an incident at the bean factory. You must have people. They're all running to the vault. Get underground. It happened. It finally happened. It finally happened.

Oh that no it's not a mushroom cloud actually. It's more of a bean situation. Officials on the scene originally said they don't know how long it would be before residents could return to their homes. The rough border for evacuation was north of Meeba's Street, east of Canterbury Drive, west of Monmouth Road, and south of Piqua Road and Monmouth Road intersection, just in case, so you can triangulate your own position off that. Yeah. So far, no medical issues have been reported from those in the area. And thank God. Seems like it's pretty common for the factories to just kind of explode over there and everyone have to leave their homes.

Yeah, a lot of hazmat situations in the United States and I don't know if just because they had a few high profile hazmat incidents from train crashes recently that they've started reporting on the more or whatever or if I'm just seeing them more because I'm paying more attention because what you call that? What th, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, to just, to just, to just, and to just, and to just, and to just, and their their, their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the, their their their their thea, their their their thea, their their their their their tho or whatever or if I'm just seeing them more because I'm you know paying more attention to it because what do you call that confirmation bias yeah but holy fuck there are a lot of them big country lots of stuff happening but boy check your soybean chemical mixture a lot of smells coming out of places you know yeah But hey, we've all been there. We doing one more, Ben, and we wrapping it up. No, I think we have. That's probably an episode of the podcast,

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We've been informed that they're selling like hot cakes. Yeah, which is nice. So, you know, get in there and get one. Thank you for listening. If you want more of these episodes, you know what to do. And if you don't, great. We'll see you next week. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. you