Boonta Vista - EPISODE 317: The Opposite Of Phimosis (with Tom Walker)

Episode Date: October 14, 2023

We're joined again by political satirist Tom Walker to discuss: A chemical spill on a bullet train, a wine catastrophe at a dinner party, and one man's penis. Plus: A little bit of Headline News. *** Find Tom at https://www.tomwalkerisgood.com/

Welcome to Buntlemist of Episode 307 I'm going to come soon, and then make it happen. I don't what, five, seven seconds free here? I'd well treat myself. Is this probably happening to make the presents? Too busy. Oh, well, he has time. Of course. Welcome to Bunton of the President of the two businesses. Welcome to Buntle Mr. Episode 317. I'm Andrew your host. Welcome back to another episode of Wheel of Torture.

That's right! This is the show where our beautiful contestants compete for cash and prizes by answering questions, and then spinning the big torture wheel. First up is a contestant from Cans. He loves the footy and he hopes one day to travel across the seas to a far off land. Tasmania. It's Ben. Hello, I'm from Cans.

You're how excited he is to be here folks. Fucking woo. Wasn't the cowboyboys season, but you know we'll be back. All right Ben, calm down. Here's your question. In what year was the first hand grenade invented? I try. Bearing in mind, we've taken away your phone and you will be punished if you open Google. I'm pretty sure they had those hand grenades or whatever, the storm granita in World War I. So I'm going to say 1895. Incorrect. Ben spin that wheel. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, torture. Tick. Tick. Tick.

I had it before, but I've closed the window now. Okay. Anyway, it was invented in England. You've landed on Sweden Trunk. The use of Swedish trunk is recorded in the histories of towns throughout southern Germany. Although specific circumstances differed, in every case a restrained and gagged

victim was forced to swallow by means of a funnel, a large amount of unappetizing, sometimes boiling liquid. Substances such as urine, excrement, liquid manure, and gray water were used for this purpose. Our next contestant is an IT systems administrator from Perth, who loves Game of Thrones, Harry Potter, and on weekends, 50 Shades of Grey, it's Theo. Hey, hey, get one. Good. Do you get horny when you read those books?

Yeah. Yeah, dude. Get horny my dick. Theo. Who was the Chinese emperor immediately preceding Wu Yi? Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Now it wasn't... You can't pretend that you know more than two Chinese, more than one. Name the one that you know.

Ah, the one that Andrew said, I know that now. Oh, he couldn't come up within a time, unfortunately, it was when we ding! Theo go ahead and spin that wheel. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Sorry, I didn't go very far. My musculature is not very mature. Oh, well, it looks like you just picked up a burst of strength. Oh, Theo will be receiving, Payne a culee. That is from the the the the the the the the the the thio go thio go thio go thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio thio go go go thio go go go go th. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go go. th. th. th. th. thi. the. the. the. the. the. theo. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, go. That is from the Latin for penalty of the sack. Hmm. I thought you just had that done a couple of weeks ago. I did. I did. You know the first thing that they do, so after they spray your nut sack with like the anesthetic stuff,

the first thing that they do is clamp them down. Now I actually I would love to see what this looks like because I only felt what it feels like. I was not looking. I was not looking. I was I was singing along to Queens Fat Bottom Girls which was on the Spotify on the medicals. And that's undignified. Making making brave conversation with the Spotify, on the medicalists, and... That's undignified. Making brave conversation with the surgeon. To be like, aren't I a good boy? Painter coolay. Go on.

Under Roman law was imposed on a subject who had been found guilty of patricide. The punishment consisted of being sewn up in a leather sack with an assortment of live animals including a dog, a snake, a monkey, and a chicken or rooster, and then being thrown into water. Congratulations. Wow. And finally, we have Sydney-based comedian and podcaster Tom Walker. Hello. Tom is the host of Big Softittyitty.PnG and Comedian Extraordinaire. Tom, here is your question. When was the earliest extant example of woven silk fabric?

Oh, I'm going to go ahead and put that at extant, you say. Hmm. Well, that changes things. Because of course it means existing. And I, as a result of that, I'll be saying 1200 before common era. It was 3630 BC. Spin that wheel, bitch. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. So long ago they've had silk for ages they used it would take me so long to even figure out

where the worms were much less that I could like make stuff out of what was coming out of them I was watching some YouTube videos the other night of a lady of a lady making silk silk she'll she like had these the the tho th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I I I th. I th. I th. I the the the the the the the the the the. I the. I the. I the. the. the. the the. the. It the. It's the. It's the. It the. It the. It the. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It th. It the the the the the the the the the the ta ta ta ta ta ta ta ta' ta' ta' took ta' took took took took ta' took, ta' ta' took, took, took, took, the. tons of these little baby tiny little silkworms and she spread them all out over a thing and then she chopped up all this nice greenery and then she just left that over all of them and then they eat that and they get bigger and all these nice little bugs and then they like take them out and place them onto these plants and then they make themselves little cocoons and they their they they they they they they they they they they they they they they their they they they they they they they they they they their they they they they they they their they they they they they they they they they they they they their their they they they they they they they they they they they they they they their they they they their they their their their their they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took took their took their thoe. they make themselves little cocoons and then you go along and pick off all the little cocoons and I was like oh your little homies are in there and then they collect all the silk cocoons up and then they dump them all in a hot water and I was like oh your little friends raised them for babies getting boiled crazy looking though Tom you've landed on scaffism

msafism also known as the boats, is an alleged ancient Persian method of execution mentioned by Plutarch. It is ostensibly entails trapping the victim between two boats, feeding and covering them with milk and honey. Oh, that's nice. You got that going for you. And allowing them to fester and be devoured by insects and other vermin over time. Hmm.

Congratulations everyone. Well, thank you. I would like to be brought inside before I'm devoured by the insects. But I guess that's just because I, you know what, I can dish out of the eat and I simply can't take it. I reckon I can't t, right? Like if I fight off all these weasels or whatever, I get out of this sack, I'm home free. Like, I feel like the water's going to penetrate the leather sack pretty quick. But particularly around the area where it's been sewn up.

Oh yeah. That's the weak point. I can use that to my advantage. I'm using, see, the most important thing when you're in a dangerous situation, like sown into a sack with a mountain line or whatever, it's so you don't lose your cool. I would immediately open a dialogue with the animals and form an alliance. Yeah, we all want to get out of here. None of us are happy in the sack. Unionize. Everyone in the sack, form a union.

Yeah, you have the power in there. Three of you against the sacks the sacks, or the sacks, or the sacks, or the sacks, or the sacks, or the sack, or the sack, or, or, or, the sack, the sack, the sack, the sack, the saa, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thus, tho, the, the, the the the the the the the the, the, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thoomoom?.. Soooomorrow, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo? Yeah, you have the power in there. Three of you against the sack or however many, you the weasel and the rooster or whatever the fuck? Oh my god, and the look on the look on the face of the people who tried to punish me as I rise from the water on the back of a mountain lion. And the mountain lion triamfantly sewing a sack for themselves to take their own lives before I get to them. Born aloft by the humble rooster. Um, should they, hey, when you get a vasectomy, they should just like, like change the things so the cum just goes into each other instead of going out of

the dick. Do you mean like one of those, one of those cords that you see online every now and then where you can plug it into itself? Yeah, yeah. So instead of like, instead of like going out into the penis, instead what I'm proposing is that the two, the two, the two, I assume that the ball sack has two different ball serve the come up. It does the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th is th is tho, tho, tho, thu, thu, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, instead, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the right, like, like, the right, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the right, like, like, the right, like, the right, like, like, like, like, like, like, the right ball and left ball serve the come up, it does. There are two different shoots. You are great. Okay, what if we just take them and just put them together and so all the come just goes like tuk tuk tunk tunk against each other? Now I'm loving the idea Tom. I'm also thinking that you could take each of the tube and go sort of like to ball. to the tube. the ball. the ball. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. T. T. T. T. The. tome. tome. tome. tome. tome. tome. tome. tome. too. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. too. too. to. too. too. too. too. tome. too. take the tube from ball A over to ball B. You could take the tube from ball B over to ball A and you've kind of got a camarabros. Wee!

They'd go. Yeah. What I was also thinking is, well, they're cutting it off. They just sort of, they loop it over like a cable that they're storing and they just sort of point it away of the sack. Every time it just like pipes a little. Okay, well, maybe just one at a time. It's not, it's not piping the come out of their on demand, is it?

Yeah, I think so. I think the balls are getting real big and then they come, like a cartoon. It's so good is that like anytime you have a conversation with anyone, even like friends who have recently had a vasectomy, is that fucking no one understands how any of this works. They have like a child's understanding of like, Oh, I've got diagrams. Listen to the one where the guys like,

oh, my balls. They send you, they send you diagrams, they send you stuff and I just clicked through all that real nice and fast, like a workplace safety module so I could just consent at the end. Yeah, do whatever you want, do whatever you want, no more kids. Not of my business. Get in there and just freestyle, you know? How fun of their wrap is in there, I don't give a shit as long as my line end ends here. If you need somewhere to put some surgical s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s sa, the they, they, th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, the, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th. th. th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the thea. they they they thea. they they they theaaaugh, the they theatea. thea. thea. thea, to put some surgical scissors, leave him in there.

Not a big deal. I'm leaving a time capsule in this guy. A USB stick with Olivia Rodrigo. Whoever exumes his tomb. If you really did let the guy just freestyle all super crazy in there, he might even end up in the news. And wouldn't that make for an interesting headline? You might hear about Lon. Headline News. I've got two headlines for you. Clown brings experience to Chisholm Trail Ram Prairie Circuit Finals Rodeo. Okay, you want that experience.

I need an experienced clown at my rodeo. It would be literally the worst thing you could say at a rodeo is this is my first rodeo. Good news everyone. We have an inexperienced clown. I just want to, I really want to focus on the name of the rodeo. The Chisholm Trail Ram Prairie Circuit finals rodeo? Yes. Chisome Trail Ram Prairie Circuit finals rodeo? Is that? And we can't look into it any further. And there's no fat in that at all. No, they've trimmed out everything.

Nothing you can say out. Need every word. Our last one for you here. Wonder Entertainment launches Pumpkin Party as an autumn extravaganza. Fresh and festive event to pumpkin into the full spirit. You can't just do whatever you want. It's a fresh and festive event for so long trying to figure out what's the second half again. I'm gonna need it again. Give it to me again. It's a fresh and festive event to pumpkin into the full spirit. Are you pronouncing quotes there? No, I'm emphasizing the way they would emphasize it. I'll say it with a completely neutral tone. Yeah, say it, say it as it as it's written. It's, as it, to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the full the full the full the full the full to the full to to to to the full the full th. th. to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th'm emphasizing the way they would emphasize it.

I'll say it with a completely neutral tone. Yeah, say it as it's written. Say it like you're the, like you're the Tick-Tock, the AI voice. A fresh and festive event to pumpkin into the fall spirit. To pumpkin into the fall spirit. What do you mean pumpkin into the fall spirit. Yeah.

But all of the events are stale. I'm looking for something fresh to help me pumpkin into the fall. How do you go into the false? Oh, fucking hell. Pumpkin into the false spirit! Americans get an autumnal madness upon them. They become absolutely crazy the moment the leaves start to change the the the the the the the fall the the the fall the the the fall the the fall the the f the f f the f f f f f sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp sp spi. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They become absolutely crazy the moment the leaves start to change color. They really do. They have special beverages out

there. They change their color palette which is like I get that obviously it's getting colder so you're gonna start rugging up more. You're getting your sweaters and your scarves. I don't traffic with that sort of thing but I understand that's necessary for them. But they also start dressing in the colors of the environment. They wear oranges and browns and things of that nature like the, hey look, here comes the seasonal variant of Tom. Yeah, yes, like the holiday special skin of Tom. Cool new limited Tom. And he's blending into the environment wouldn't you believe? Now in fairness Ben or Tom not everybody lives fun. You should be writing these headlines Ben not everybody lives in a place

where one can wear an identical outfit all year round. And I do. Yes. You do. So I feel like in a way you're maybe being a touch a touch judgmental of people wearing different clothing. Yes. That's right. Hey on the bonus episode we have this great comedian called Tom Walker and we're doing we're doing some mail bag stuff but here is one that we are that we didn't get you on that right how and why have you sent me this image what were you looking for? What were you looking for? What is going on? Hold on, I need to see. Oh, oh. He's wearing wrestling boots.

Yeah. Like specifically, the wrestling ones, not like... Oh. Well, he might be doing some wrestling. This is... How do you describe this guy's mast? Is this quarter, like what's going on? I don't know. It's the first time I've seen it, it's such a confusing erection. I think it's a full erection, it just has a slight bend in it. It's been pulled down. It does have a bend, but you also have to consider that he does have a large weight attached to his testicles. And that's going to be pulling the whole the whole the whole the whole the whole their their tholololololololol, thiii................. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi, thi. It's thi. It's tho, tho, tho, I've tho, I've tho, I've th. It's, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's thi. It's, thi. It's, thi. It's the first. It's the first. It's the first. It's the first. It's thicles. And that's going to be pulling his whole shit down and adjusting what you see before you.

I'm suggesting that if he didn't have the big testicle weight, now this is an audio medium. Yes. I just want you to imagine for a moment. So my first impression when I open this image if I, if you'll indulge me me my first impression when I open the image was naked erect Simon cowl cosplaying as nude sergeant slaughter but on closer inspection I see that it is not like a mounty type hat it is in fact more of a biker daddy Alpertino in cruising. He looks like M. Bison. He does, he does look like Nude M. Bison.

From the eyes up he looks like he looks like M. Bison. But for some of us who maybe have imagined or dared to dream about what nude M. Bison more muscular than this to my mind. Yeah, that's true. Why does he look like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's the, like he's the red like he's the red like he's the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red the red carpet. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's like. He's like. He's like. He's like, th. He's like, th. He's like, th. He's like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He looks. He looks. He looks. He looks like. More muscular than this to my mind. Yeah, that's true. Why does he look like he's on the like, the red carpet for a movie premiere? Why is he doing such an inviting hand gesture? Like, please, take my hand. Let me show you my Italy.

He doesn't look like he's upset about you having He doesn't look like he's upset about anything. He doesn't look like appeared in the room where he's like he's upset about anything. Everything seems to be going just fine for, okay so this is Reddit user Matt D.W. 1234 from R. Slash ball stretching. Oh, so you can look up this image yourself, the listener. And the title of this post is in all caps, this heavy steel ball weight feels amazing on. And then I've linked you one also in there, which is another post

that he made, which is just titled, Hey, Come On Over, again in all caps. He actually weirdly looks less inviting in the picture with Hey, Come On Over that he does in the other one. I agree. Yeah. I'm sorry, somehow I can't believe this has slipped my mind, but have we remarked upon his tattoos yet? No. No. No. Of the the the the the the the two two two the two two two two two two two two two two the two two two two two two two two two two two the two two two two th. th. th th th to to to to too. to to to to to to to too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th., but have we remarked upon his tattoos yet? No. Of the two beautiful side-profile dolphins leaping in concert directly towards his penis? That's beautiful. What an interesting man. Anyway, I posted this in the chat because Theo posted a link to a, a visectomy, and I wanted

to pay him by it. There was no symmetry of your posting there at all. This is actually in the DSM under Happy. So, maybe you're right, Ben, Tom has immediately presented a very dark mirror version. That's what he does. He's a comedian, he flips things on the head and he makes you think. Thank you, that's th and th and th. th. th. thin Paul thin Paul thin Paul thin Paul th. thin thin thin, Ben thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, the thin, thin, tho, tho, tho, tho, to thi. thi. tho, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the the the the the the the the the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. the thi. theeeooooooooooooooom. theoooooooooooooooooom. to to the head, and he makes you think about, thank you, that's true, he really does make me think. This balls are getting stretched out. Now, look, you really sideline as soon as conversation about Ben's wardrobe? Yeah, it does.

It makes it longer. Is it like a spacer or a stretch for you eat? How long they go? Yeah, it's like, their ball's like, their ball, their ball, their ball, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, their, their, their, their, that, their, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is their, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is their, is their, is, is their, is their, is their, is. It's their, is. their balls. their balls. their balls. their balls. their balls. their balls. that, is. their balls. their balls, their balls, their balls, their ball's, their ball's, makes, their. their ball's, makes, makes, makes, makes, makes it their ball's their ball's their ball's their ball's, makes, makes, makes, makes it's their make their balls longer. So their balls like hang lower. I got long balls? Yeah, which is its own reward. There's one guy on there who was, his whole thing was that he added a bunch of like steel rings to his ball sack and he kept posting his long, long balls like ensconced in rings, like a tower of rings, you know. And he kept posting them being like, would anyone like to fuck my balls? There is like a kind of horniness that is,

you actually were just talking about this on a recent episode of the podcast, Pigsoft Titty. P&G, we're talking about like fanfic writers, where their horniness is so extreme that it makes them compelled to put stuff on the internet in the first place. But also, it makes people crazy. And I don't want to, we don't want to shame people for their kinks or what have you, but also, if you're doing these sorts of Reddit posts, what an odd, what an odd thing that you're doing. Have you tried just like jacking off?

I love it. Instead of just like stretching your balls, to just, th, th, th you just jack off? Ben, I'm going to go out on a limb and say I think these people have tried jacking off. I reckon that's probably where they started. Yeah and to me the fact that I can go on R slash ball stretching and sorry ball stretchers and sought by top best posts by weekly or monthly and have different results because it's such a thriving community boy that's a treat. Do you reckon ball stretches came up with pot bellies and chain smokers they're all part of the scene at the same time? Ben you are! Did they get walked out in the in the bonus episode? It did not? they did get played for Demi and she enjoyed it. It did kind of a good idea. I think it's kind of. Yeah. I. I the the the the the th. I to th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th th th. Boy thriving. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy th th th th th th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th. Boy th th th. Boy th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is kind th thi thi. Boy. Boy. Boy. Boy. I th is th is t try. Boy try. Boy try. Boy try. Boy th is thri thri thri thri thri thri th in the bonus episode? It did not.

No, but it did get played for Deming and she enjoyed it. I think it's kind of a good. I think we can say that she enjoyed it. I think that is a way of describing it. I think that's reasonable to say. But Ben, like, I kind of get what you feel is like, there's the people that are kind of exploring unknown pleasures and sort of the pleasures that you only get from, you know, shooting a crossbow at a horse from a hot air balloon or whatever. Yeah, there's some stuff that people in Hellraiser were talking about, which I assume when they're like, I want to do crazy shit, they're talking about shooting a horse with a crossbow from a hot air balloon.

That's also the horniest thing I can think of. Yeah. But. That's stuff. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's tho. That's tho. That's tho. That's their. That's their. That's their. their. theiriest thing I can think of. Yeah, but stuff that feels good. Whereas this feels like they're just doing stuff that's like coming down to elaborate painful frotting? Yes. It seems like you just had some stuff lying around. Yeah. And you're like, I put some of this on me. I had these insanely heavy stainless shower curtain rings. And I also have my balls. Let's see if I can buy these items in my inventory.

I've got this V2 rocket labeled 0, 0,000, 0, 0, what if I got in a skin suit? I gave myself a big erection. I fired that bad boy off towards England. We call to see Pinhead walk in on one of these guys and just be like, I don't know, but... Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, why don't you try sitting on your hand until it feels like it's somebody else? If you put something in your ass, it will make you come. Maybe stand up really fast and then jack off while you're dizzy. We have such sights to show you. Have you ever done girl on top? The skinned guy that's like I am in hell that he's got six rings around his nutsack. No one's asking questions about where the skin went.

Can you see that? He'd be so mad because it would have hurt so much. Tom, imagine seeing Pinhead blush. You gotta feel bad. You gotta feel a little ooh. Oh, I thought you were saying like, hey, I kind of like that stuff that's stuck in your head. And you'd be, oh me. No, I think, I think if Pinhead shows up while you're doing your sick, oh shit that you were in the middle of when you were like playing around with the lament configuration a little too much,

and he turns up and he sees what you're doing, and he kind of, and pinhead just turns to the side and puts one hand up. Oh, shit. Oh, nasty. Yuck. Yawk. Yaw Could you stop showing me that sight for a second? Hey, check this out. And he's hitting himself with a club or whatever.

I don't know what he's into. It's all kind of stuff. Some cool effects in those movies, Ben. Yeah. Some cool, practical effects, particularly in the first one, where there's like a little decomposing pile of goo, and a guy then sort of reappears out of it. He's a little skeleton, he comes up out of the puddle,

and he builds himself up again. I wonder what that goo was, some type of mystery liquid. Mystery liquid, can't tell what color it is with a slick oily sheen. What could it mean? Mystery liquid, I see some goop that is forming a pool on the floor. Who is it for? I'm gonna taste the mystery liquid. I'm gonna taste the mystery liquid. This comes to us from the Asahi Shimbun.

Man who spilled chemical on bullet train faces investigation. Hmm. This is the problem Theo with having it just come out the side and drip. Yeah, sort of liable. You can't do any of those videos where you're on the train and you can. When you were talking about doing this with... What sort of video? What do you just...talking about doing this with the... No, what sort of video? Go ahead and finish the thought on what kind of video? Huh? That one's that you see online. What's happening to Sir on the train? The videos you see online? But it doesn't, it's not going to work if you've got like two little exhaust pipes sticking out. What is it going the public category on the websites.

You got into categories. Do you just mean people jacking off in public? Is that it? No, they're getting. They're doing what? They're getting it. In private, but like, they're getting jacking off? They're done to them. And the ticket the the the the the the the the the the ticket ticket ticket ticket ticket ticket ticket ticket ticket to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get. to get.? Done to them. And then like the ticket collector's like, oh, I'll take your tickets.

He joins in. Well, I'm on the public category on Pornhub.com, which is the site I've just learned about. Tom, can you search for ticket collector public? Ticket collector. We're going to get to the public. Ticket collector. We're gonna get to the bottom of the collector. Let's start with maybe train and see if that gets us anywhere. No, we already got a specific enough to. This is not a thing that I meant to, by the way.

This is just something that I understand. It's just something I know about for no reason. Oh, it's just the first thing that came to mind. what I thought of convents in a ball sack. This is simply something that I obviously have at top of mind. Neighbor lost cards and got a huge dick on the train. See? It happens. Happens to the best of us. I guess.

Yeah. Anyway, when you were talking about having down pipes on your dick, I immediately started picturing like, you know the thing they put on a horse when it's walking around on public streets to catch this little poopies? Yes, it's a little opposite-end saddlebag. I was immediately thinking about how you would design a device. How you would design a device. I was thinking of a feedbag. Theo. Oh, cut. No, no. I was sort of like the the um have you ever seen how they make make they make they make they make they make they make they make they make they make they make they make they make they make the the the they they the the th. the the th. th. the th. the the the the the th. the the the they the they th. the the the th. they they they their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. the. the. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. th. theat. the. their their the, um, have you ever seen how they make maple syrup? Yeah, put a tap in. Where they knock a tap in and they hang a little bucket underneath. Oh, so you're thinking just a bucket off the pipe.

Yeah, I mean, that would mean we could kind of like kind of clock out, you know. Finally, time for Papa to kick back. Yeah. And you can do whatever to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to pop to pop to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tapapapapapapapapapot tapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotapotap. tap. tap. tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap t kick back. Yeah. And you can do whatever you want with it afterwards. That's not my business anymore. Obviously, and you're gonna want to do a lot, of course. You go ahead. Such a good throw line to have between the two episodes. Finding a purpose for come. Yeah, have they failed? Like, name one off the top of your head. Police planned to investigate a chemical that burneded three three three three three three three three three three th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. the the their thi. their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to top. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too. too. too. too. too. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. top. top. top. their. they. they. they. they. they. ty. te. te. te. te. toda. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. of your head. Police plan to investigate a man who accidentally leaked a chemical that burned three passengers and himself and sickened to others.

Oh my god. On a Tohoku Shinkansen, Shinkansen train. Mine doesn't do that. The chemical believed to be used for geological surveys. Apparently spilled from a plastic bottle on the Hiabusa number 52 train running from Shin Amorai Station in Amorai. He's just keeping that in a little to a little thermos? I think he's just holding it his hands. I'm picturing two liter milk bottle. Yeah plastic to me means you're probably ruling out thermos. Sure. Sure- Sure.

Hmm. Or as he has he filled up his reusable Frank Green cup? Just to take some home for later. Investigators will determine if such a carrying method was appropriate for the chemical and whether the man can be charged with professional negligence resulting in injuries, sources said. Hmm. Hmm. Done and done. All four burn victims suffered slight injuries. Two others, including a railway worker, complained of feeling sick after inhaling vapor from the chemical. Don't take that on the train. What kind of geological...

What kind of burny, stinky? Geological survey related liquid. I think we'll get there. I think it's coming up. Shortly before the bullet train stopped at Sendai Station, a passenger told the man who was from Tokyo and in his 40s that something was leaking from a black bag places at his feet. Hey buddy, sprung a little leak there. The man carried the bag toward one end of the car, but the chemical spilled out over the floor and caused burns to his feet. Hmm.

Yeah, that's on you. You move the back. One passenger told the Asahi Shimbun that a man told him outside the seating area that a sulfuric acid reagent had exploded by a mistake. Oh. The bottoms of the man's pants were damaged. What kind of pants you think he had on? Hey can you not put in the paper that my pants got hurt? Reporter furiously scribbling. Yeah, no, no, no, no, we'll see what we can do for sure. These pants were damaged, causing upwards of $12 of damage.

Don't put in the paper that my cheap pants got hurt. These pants were ugly, but they were ugly before as well, so the chemical had nothing to do with that. Now they are ugly and damaged. Guy standing there talking to the journalist, you don't have to put that that that that that that that that that that th that they that that that the they talking to the journalist. You don't have to put that they were JNCOs. Okay, you don't? The splash must have been high as they were three-quarter length. A man's caprize ruined today.

Oh. What are the craziest kind of pants to wear on a train? Like Jodpers? That is a very crazy pants to wear on a train? Like Jodpers? That is a very crazy pant to wear on a train. There'd be such a crazy pan to wear on like public transport. Surely you're getting your own way. It says, Joddpahs really do say, I will be piloting a beast. Yeah. Yeah.

Another passenger said she smelled a faint, pungent odor. Now, this is where we start getting a bit. It's a train. Both bad and three stoogesy. A five-year-old boy slipped on the chemical and fell to the floor while walking to a restroom. He suffered burns to his buttocks. Oh no! Yeah, that's more, you know, that's not great.

His parents burned their hands and feets their their their their. His parents burned their hands and feet when they tried to help him. They were spanking him, they were spanking him to tell him off for slipping on that nice man's lovely chemical. Oh my hand! This is putting your naughty bottom on that lovely chemical, boy. He worked very hard to earn that sulfuric acid reagent and you're just messing it up. Awful. You have to make everything about you. What is a reagent? I thought you would know that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really, we were all sitting here being like, well, these theater knows what the fuck. Yeah, god damn, that sucks. When they say a sulfuric acid reagent, are they just, does it just, does it just mean sulfuric acid rea. We got th, we th, we th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, thus, tho, thus, thus, that, thus, tho, tho, tho, thus, thus, thus, thus, I thus, I thus, I thus, I thus, I thus, I th. I th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. I th, th, th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thus. I that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo and fire. The Tom that knows things. Hey, hey, we should get smart Tom on. You did show you the guy with the balls. You did show me the weird, the weird angle.

A reagent is refers to positions lower than the ruler of a country. Okay. Yes. So it's a chemical you add to a substance or compound to do a chemical test on it. So it's just sulfuric acid being used to test the composition of something. It's sulfuric acid with a job. Yes. Yes. It's doing self-yricing podcast.

What do you think he was taking it home to see what it did something to? What it does to see what it did something to. Wonder what this does to me at home. What it does to my balls? Yeah, what if I put it in the outlets? He was just lining up a bunch of stuff on the kitchen counter, you know, old rotisserie chicken, a second thing. We've all got ideas. Nobody doesn't like Andrew. Oh, he's light on his feet, folks.

Smoke was rising from a bag placed near a door of the number seven car, according to a man who was waiting for the train on the platform. You never want to see smoke coming from a bag on the train, that's my opinion. Yeah. I think it's fine, I wouldn't make a big deal about it. Well, you wouldn't make a big deal about anything because of your shame of being noticed in public. Absolutely. Your shoes would have, the shoes would, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to, to, to, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thrown, thoes, thoes, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, to smoke, to smoke, to smoke, to smoke, to smoke, to smoke, to to to to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, thi. That's, thi. That's, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thi. And, thr. And, to be to bea. And, tooooooooooooooooooooooom. And, thr. And, thr. And, thr. And, thr.'m making him feel guilty on purpose. So I should probably just let this eat the soles of my feet. Yeah, the only thing that would make Theo leave that situation is if he started worrying,

like, do people think I'm being derivative of the this is fine dog? People think I'm referencing a meme? First of all, what is that voice you got there to? I'm Kee, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thio, thi, thio, thi, thio, thio, thio, thio, thio, thio, thio, thio, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, got there to? I'm Theo. I'm Kenny. Hello? I have children. Yeah, look, I can't, my voice box is this size, all right? I can't put some rings on it to make it longer.

Oh, can you? Interesting. I mean, I could talk like, like this in my actual voice, but it wouldn't. Oh, I love that. That sounds like... Oh my god. Taking off his radio voice. For once, but the people don't like it. They're like my nerdy, weedy voice.

I love the character of the- This is mostly because podcasters are like dogs and they respond better to a more to a more to a more to a more to a more to a more to a more to a more to a more to to to to to to to to to to to to to to character of the character. This is mostly because podcasters are like dogs and they respond better to a more high-pitch, more excitable noise gets them excited. So you have to do the high-pitch voice. Yeah. Personally, I like your voice, Theo. I like it too. I'm more into his body. Oh, the body can't quit. Oh, the body can't quit. Passengers in nearby cars were tense. not knowing what to to to to th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. Oh the body can't quit. That's open. Passengers in nearby cars were tense, not knowing what had happened. Fear of the Unknown. Police officers.

That could be true of literally any time on the train. Yes. Ooh, I'm worried about the future. What's happening? Something could be happening somewhere. Yeah. What's happening in the future of my life? And how did I act in the past of my life? And is the direction that I'm choosing currently now

and the present good also? Oh no, boy am I tense. And there's a smoking bag. Oh, and also that guy's feet are melting. So obviously I have a lot on. Police officers and firefighters were called to the scene and fire engines and ambulances were assembled outside Sendai Station. The Hiabusa number 52 was suspended and all passengers had to disembark at the station according to East Japan Railway Company. This is the difference between Japan and France. Japan functions, a little bit of sulfuric acid gets in there, they shut it all down.

They work out what's going on. Air France, a guy who does bloody diarrhea in the footwell. Just a little bit of diarrhea. Well, you got five more flights till it goes into maintenance. Hey, here's a moist towel lip. Good luck out there. Wipe that up. Bon Shantz. Ha ha.

It's giving your flight a little Janisa Kwa. So we promise you will remember this flight forever. Twelve Tokyo-bound trains on the Tohoku Shinkansen line were delayed by up to 55 minutes, affecting about 7,300 passengers. Just do a swimming up? You reckon they put the replacement buses on? The driver's leaning out the window, kind of waving them around. Are you tired of paying nothing for the same old superior quality free episodes of the Buntavista podcast?

Do you want less politics and more content about diarrhea, our animals gone wild? You're tired of skipping through those hours upon hours of paid product placement for Mark Wahlberg Film Shooter. Well, boy, do I have the offer of a lifetime for you. That's right, for just five US dollars a month. You too can be a premium VIP member of the Buntavista Patreon. That's right, just five US dollars for all of our bonus episodes. That's over 300 hours of content from the hosts you know and definitely tolerate. I'll even throw in access to our glamorous and exclusive Discord server, where bizarre arguments only happen once or twice a week at most. Head to Patreon.

dot com slash Buntavista. Sign up in the next five minutes and I won't know because that's not my job, but you'll be enjoying the sweet satisfaction of supporting us, and we will love you romantically for it. That's my promise to you. Ben? Do you have a great segue to get to... Hey Theo, you were talking about the difference between Japan and France. I was, yeah. Let's list them all off.

Yeah, okay. So, sort of... But of course, the first thing that springs to mind... Is the difference in etiquette etiquetetic etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet etiquet, the the the the the first thing that springs to mind is the difference in etiquette. It's time for etiquette watch. Yes. You check this out, bringing sulfuric acid onto a train that's simply poor etiquette. Fucking shit is right there all along Yes on this very shop-worn segment

We bring to you of course we return once again to wine spectators ask Dr. Vinny advice column. Yeah, I think that's Vinny is in like Vino. Oh, is that cool? Yeah, I mean, thii me? I mean wine. I think that's von. Oh, tom. tom. tom. co. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that's. that's. that's. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. th. th. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. th. that. that. that. that. that. th. that. th. that. th. that. th. that. that. that. th. th. the. the. th. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th't that cool? Yeah. Asked doctor if I mean no. I mean why? Tom, come on, man. What have you posted? Oh. Come on! It's a crazy looking penis. It's so red. I've never seen one with like, it has like worm-like striations. Why is it the opposite of Fimosis? This is just... Yeah, we need to get someone in there and tighten it up. Yes. It's got a foreskin like a much-loved hoodie. Do you think, do you think these guys get the same thing that like people who people who gauge their ears

and stuff and make them really big and then at some point they're like streetcrant? I'm not actually that into this anymore. Yeah. Have you ever seen the videos Tom of people getting that like undone? No, like you can say like people getting up like accidentally snapping No, like you can say you can say I'm done. I'm retiring my hugely stretched gaugeed ears right and they just go Clip clip and they just sew the bits of the bottom back together make you a little ear lobe they make you new ear do you think they let you keep the worm?

Come on let me have my worm. Let me take the worm home. I promise I'm not gonna eat it. You're losing something in the process there, right? Like they're taken off. I guess. You can't just stretch it out to where it was before and snip some stuff off and then have the same amount of ear. Or can you? I don't know. Well, think about the the th you. You th. You th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to thi. the the tho. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. the. the. the. to to to to tomoooomoomoomoomoomoomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. tomorrow. the. th it doesn't have any like functional difference on it does it? No compared to. It feels good when it's a twiddle. Which is of course very different to when people do like the forked penis. What have you ever seen that? Quintavista is a comedy current events podcast where we taught, take sort of like low stakes news stories from around the world. He didn't want to say licked. We all saw him twiddled. Tweedled.

Come on! He didn't want to say Licked. We all saw him load up Licked. Oh, heavens, I love it so much if you twiddled me this evening. Might I be twiddled? Oh, you ever seen a video of someone getting twiddled? You know, the ones you see online. Yeah. A little public twiddling? You can go to public, yeah, twiddling.

The chicken man's coming. Stop twiddling me. He said not things I'm into. Maria writes, wine refrigerators. By the time she was ready for a glass, her bottle was already empty. My God, there's been some kind of wine thief. The montage from Commando of Arnie just cocking all those guns. The volunteer poorer, you know, a friend of the host, helped her find another bottle of red and opened it. The next day, the host wrote a scathing email, calling my friend a thief and demanding that she pay for his wine, which apparently was expensive and not meant for guests.

She would never have consumed it if she had known, what to do, Maria, San Francisco. Now this is a problem we've all encountered. I would say. She would never have consumed it if she had known what to do Maria San Francisco. Now this is a problem we've all encountered, I would say 250 times at least. Yes. Yes, but I've never been friends drinking my delicious expensive wine, of course. They come up from the underground wine cellar, bottle in each hand, and you go, oh no, that's the 1947. But I can't, I mustn't say anything, I'd embarrass him. Ha ha ha ha, yeah, glasses are just in the kitchen. Little tear rolling down your cheek.

Wine sucks because you can't tell how expensive it is. Whereas with spirits you kind of can. You have like a good enough working knowledge to be like, I don't recognize this brand. Yeah. I'm not touching it. There's like eight kinds of scotch. Yes. I thought you're going to say wine. Eight types of wine. There is. There's the stuff on the floor.

You know, first shelf, second shelf, third shelf. In a bag. Yeah. With stuff they keep behind glass at certain BWS's and Dan Murphy's. Oh, you know you want to get behind that glass. Oh, man, I would love to taste like a $200 bottle of wine. How much better that be? That's the fear of like improving your life though. Because imagine if it is better. Yeah, imagine if you're like, oh, uh-oh. Yeah, this is kind of, I can't, can't keep the cheap stuff now.

A friend of mine like was buying stuff off of the wire cutter when the wire cutter first like launched and she was like, yeah, no, it's incredible. Like, everything I've gotten off there has been so good, and it's like improved my life. But now it sucks because I hate everything else I own. Because I resent it for not making my life better. I think, I feel like Tom, you might have a similar brain disease to this as well, where like, anything in my life where I, that could be literally anything, like stay at a hotel or go to a restaurant

or buy an object for myself or whatever, if I just experience it, I am always like, well, fine, that certainly did the thing that I needed it to, and I don't think twice about it. But if I start reading about something in advance of choosing one, I will become unbelievably like, oh, well, this one review only gave it 96% because it turns out it builds up a small amount of static that will discharge into a minor shock once every five years. I couldn't possibly purchase that.

Yes, only a beggar and a fool would have a wonderful time for a cut rate pro. What you have to realize is essentially you don't need the best thing. No. You don't even need a good thing. I don't deserve a good thing. You don't deserve a good thing to happen to you. I'm going to be the dissenting opinion here and say that I both deserve and enjoy thi thrown. You've got a very simple relationship to things that are good in that you like to get them and then enjoy them. You're a man who... How do you say, welcomes pleasure?

Yeah. That's so true. That's so true. Oh, naive. I pity you, honestly. Have you considered presenting your joy? Yeah. Because it makes you ask lots of questions about where it

comes from and where it will come from next. Have I considered being the thief of my own joy? Yes, yes, yes. Have you considered being the thief of your own joy? That's such a bummer because you got to get on that. I'm doing what I'm doing and it's working fine. Yeah. But what if it wasn't one day for no reason? Yeah. that it stopped? Then what if it stopped, huh? And what if you remembered the time before when it worked? That'd be nice. Nice memory. I sit in the gutter looking up at the stars, you know what I mean? Boy, I sure wish I was in those stars instead of down here in the gutter. Ah. It's a good thing I got my loser friend here to keep an eye out on the gutter while I look at the stars though. Dr. Vinny says, Dear Maria, oof.

Full stop. You said it, Dr. Vinny. That's the truth. First off, let me remind you of my mantra about host gifts. They are for the host to consume or not on their own and typically shouldn't be expected to be opened for that event unless prior arrangements have been made. If you bought over a bottle of wine and expected to drink it, you're a fucking fool, Maria. That's that's bullshit. That's... What, how big was the party? Well, they don't go into detail about

the size. But like, if you're bringing a bottle of wine to someone. the the th, the th, th, the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. thi, th. And, th. And, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. And, thi. And, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom. And, thi, the party? Oh, they don't go into detail about the size. But like, if you're bringing a bottle of wine to someone's house, let's say you're a couple of adults congregating for a dinner party, you're drinking that bottle of wine? You're cracking that bottle open, almost immediately. I'm walking through the door and I'm beelining for the kitchen. The wine is open and in Ben's mouth. I'm just having the for glasses. Little lips. I'm fucking, what's his name from the start of Jurassic Park when he's inside the

trailer? The crazy dinosaur, the bang-bang dinosaur. Don't act like you don't know the name of Dr. Alan Grant, Ben. No, I'm the other guy played into the container with the dinosaur. No. Richard Hammond. Hammond. I'm John. I. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the the th. th. the th. the th. th. the the th. the th. th. the the th. the the the the the th's. th's. th's. th's. th's. th's. th's. th's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. What's. th's. th's. th's. th's. What's. th's. th. th. What's. th. What's. th. What's. What's. What's. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the the th, the guy dragged into the container with the dinosaur. I'm Hammond. I'm John Hammond from the start of Jurassic Park where he's landed in the helicopter. They get to the trailer. They open the door of the trailer. He's got the fridge door open and he's popping open the bottle of champagne that they have. And he's looking for glasses and he says I know my the way the way the way the way the way the way the way the way the way the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. tho. th. th. th. tho. thin. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the th. H. H. H. the the th. the th. th. th. the the th. the th. the the the. the. the. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. Hama. Hama.the kitchen. He is letting that champagne pour all over the floor, that old fuck. Wait, yeah.

He doesn't know the value of things because he's obscenely wealthy. The point is, I don't know what age that would stop being true, but mostly if you're like rocking up with a bottle of wine, those bottles are getting drunk. Can I address the elephant in the the elephant the elephant the elephant the elephant the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thoes. I. I, this is a concept that I'm upset about, but the volunteer poorer, the third party in the room here. That makes me miserable to think about. I don't, I fundamentally don't understand what party this is, what function is meant to serve. No, this is a Polly thing but a different kind of Polly than I used to. It's the eyes wide shut party, isn't it? This is Polly, but nobody's happy.

So you got a volunteer poor. That's a bummer. That suggests to me that everybody there thinks that like wine is serious with a capital s. You know what I mean? wine party? Is this what's going on? Well they have someone who's a volunteer, so they're volunteering their own time in the pursuit of respecting wine. But being a volunteer poorer, does that mean, does that mean you're the person who like picks the next bottle of wine and cracks it open and pours it for people? Like, you know how people in a fancy restaurant will pour wine and not like you? You'd be fucking it up, wouldn't you?

Oh, Somalia? Yeah, sure. The Somalia's, do they pour it or they just like, are they? I think volunteer poorer to me sounds like you are like a essentially a waiter into the glass. I have to assume that this is an informal designation of the moment that someone's like, oh, I'll get us some wine. I just, I've googled the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the words the word the word the word the word their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do their. Do their. Do their. Do their. Do their. Do their. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. some wine. I just I've googled the words of volunteer poorer and like, yep, the first four or five are for volunteering to pour beer at like community events and then after that, yeah, then the next one is a link to this article. Uh-huh, that's the third result. That's the sixth result. That's the sixth result, so that's you know, but like, I think they're just... I'm going to get so because I search for party volunteer pour up. So, I'm sure.

I think this is just, we're talking about someone has volunteered to pour the wine for, you know, it's like, oh, do you need a top up? Oh, I'll have a little splishy splash. Don't thushu. to say I think that this mothfuck is getting off scot-free because somebody said, hey, I'd like a glass of wine and they went, let me go and get the 1,200 BC. All right, this is from the first grape. Oh wow. You know that water and the wine thing from the Bible? Yeah, this is that wine. And honestly he made a lot of it. So, it should not be expected to be opened for that that, that, that, that, th th th th th th th th th th th to th th to to th th to. Yeah, this is that one of those. That wine. And honestly, he made a lot of it. So, it should not be expected to be opened for that event unless prior arrangements have been made.

I would say that this is... Most people can pour their own wine as well, by the way. I don't know if you know this, but like, you hold one, glasses one hand, pull the other. I mean, it's a fraud enterprise for sure, but the volunteer poor and also this person saying you shouldn't be expected to be open for that event unless prior arrangements have been made, that suggests to me that you are attending the kind of party where you could safely assume that there would be a volume of good quality liquor, beer, spirits, wine, whatever, for you to consume without really thinking about how much of it there was or who was paying for it. That's what it suggests to me. They're not rocking up with, say, three tallies of four X gold and two black

rats premixes. It's not people coming together and pooling their alcohol and they all drink that for the evening. This is a different class, right? I feel like at the start, the host really needed to do the, this wine you may serve to guests. This wine, never ever. And then they can kind of like every time they come, the volunteer poor goes over to the rack of wine. He's going, uh, this wine, yes, yes, yes, that. That one. That one. That th. That th. And the th. And the th. And the the th. And the the the th. And the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the th. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I tas. I tas. I tas. I tas. I tas. I to. I to. I to. I to. I the. I the. I th. I they come, the volunteer pourer goes over to the rack of wine, he's going, this wine, yes, yes, yes, that one, no, no, no, and does that little dance to himself and takes it. Yeah, the host should be, uh-uh, shaking the head of them throughout this. This one, yeah, it's exactly like the bed in black books. Yeah, absolutely. Yes, yeah. Gotcha. Nasty, dusty, old wine.

Dr. Vinnie, I want to see that degree, continues. That said, I've definitely been to parties where people bring beverages of their choice and then immediately open them to enjoy and share the Benzario. Have you been to those parties? Just saying that you've like been to a social situation before? Hey, I brought a bottle of wine. Tremendous. In that situation. Imagine if you walk it with a bottle of wine and they're like, thank you.

And they take it off of your hands and they walk down into a separate room and they come back without a bottle of wine. Oh my God. Oh, I wish we would have this together, but there were no prior arrangements. Now to sit down for a nice sober board game. I think it would be completely different. Twilight Imperium. Now, the game of terraforming Mars typically goes for three hours. But like, I would be, if I went to a party and I knew that the host had like an expansive wine collection, that they were a collector of wines.

You know, you guys, imagine say that some of the absolutely ridiculous trading cards that you get online are in fact bottles of wine. Right? Some people have collections like that. And if you're going to that person's house, I might take somebody a bottle of wine and say, I bought this interesting thing as a gift for you for your collection. But I would also assume that that person would be putting on the wine for the evening. You got a big fucking wine collection, you're a collector, we're having a wine party or whatever. It's just so insane to, I mean, the problem is the friend of the host just being like, yeah, drink this.

Yes, right? Like the friend, the volunteer poorer is the fuck up here. We all agree that this person should be put to the sword. Yes. Dr. Viddy continues, in this situation, I've been known to bring multiple bottles. One for the host that I expressly say is for them to enjoy alone. Plus other wines meant for everyone. Hey, drink this alone, you piece of shit. It's really easy to pull this one off. So you rock up and you're wearing a very large, heavy overcoat that doesn't really show if you have anything stashed about your person.

And you're holding a bottle of wine, and you loudly say to the entire party, I brought a bottle of wine for everyone. And then while they're distracted, you slip into the trench coat with your hand and you pull out the second bottle of wine and you go, this one's just for you. I think the problem, if I had to just pick one hole in the plan, it's that you distracted them to you. They are distracted by the loud sound and show that you made so they're looking at you. I do, yep. Tom are you thinking more of like a throwing a string of firecrackers? Yes. Kind of. Or perhaps I pipes, perhaps I have a friend who bursts in with a pistol. Or just firing that thing willy-nilly.

You park your car American style in a slight incline without the handbrake on. And so you know that it gives you about a minute until it crashed into someone else's car. Oh no, no, no, you stay back here with me. Oh no, I've domed someone's teask. This is your wine's just for you. This is from 2021. Like everybody- The whole crowd runs out. No, no, you stay back here with me. You stay back here with me.

This is your wine. This is just for you. This is from 2021 fantastic vintage. It's so good. Aged two years. Don't let anyone else touch it. Take it downstairs now. Getting really-

Getting really- The other bottle that's for everybody, That's the same wine. Getting super super super super super super super super super super super super the other the other the other other other other other other other other other other other other other other other other other other other other the other other other the other the's the same wine. Getting super aggressive about how you cannot let anyone else drink to wine. God, fucking sucks. I've even been known to hide the nice bottle so it won't be consumed by the party mob, the slavering mob. I hate if people drank something and enjoyed it. This sucks, man.

Yep, that's me tucing bottles of wine in your coffee mug cabinet. You know, your coffee mug cabinet, Tom? I'm worried about, I think that all of these people need to earn 50% less from whatever ill-gotten gains they're getting their money from. In this situation, Dr Winnie continues, keeping an off-limits bottle of wine in the public cooler

wasn't a good move on the host part, rookie bullshit. If the fancy bottle was a gift from another party goer, then the gifter should have made it clear that it wasn't for the party, and the host should have put it somewhere safe. I don't know, maybe in your coffee mug cabinet. Yes. Yes. Or your coffee mug cabinet. Yeah, yes. Yep. Or your fine china cabinet, your drinking glass cabinet. Your elephant gun cabinet, or you keep your collection of elephant guns.

As soon as you say coffee mug cabinet, it makes me picture like the kind of LA home that you would see in curb your enthusiasm or pornography. Yeah. I'm not familiar. Where they're like going... Sorry, some, sometimes they've the the the the the the the the the the, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, to, to, to, to, you, to, you, you, you, to, you, the, you, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're the, to the, you're, you're, your to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, your, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to the the thi, the thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, the the would see in curb your enthusiasm or pornography. Yeah. I'm not familiar. Where they're like going, I've seen the, sometimes they film porno inside houses. Not just on the way to one.

Theo's only knowledge of pornography is that you take the train to get to the bang bus. And then you hop on the bang bus and fuck away him there for as long as you can go. Then a fake taxi picks. their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I' they're. I' is like. I' is like. I' is like. I' is like. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I. I. I'er. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. th. So. th. So. th. So. th. So. th. th. th. th. So. So. th. th. So. th. So. So. So. th. So. they. So. So. they. they're. they. to the bang bus and then you hop on the bang bus and fuck away him there for as long as you can go, then a fake taxi picks you up. The bang bus is broken down and they've given me a replacement fake taxi. I'm only interested in transient experiences. Oh, liminal porn. Yeah, any liminal films you got? Tesla are an autopilot and you're in the back just getting twiddled I believe was your word of choice. If the host had the bottle in his cellar before the party it should have been moved out of

reach or clearly marked us off limits get the police tape up in your wine cellar. I'm going into the cellar grab whatever I can. It's so funny to do this. Like I, I know that the, there isar. I'm going into the cellar, grab whatever I can. It's so funny to do this, like I know that the, there is an unspoken thing in a party that is like, yeah come on in, this is, you know, please have a lovely time in my house. Don't like... Picasso, too casso. Yeah, yeah, my house is your house, but you know, to an extent. Oh, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the,ating it for the non-bilingual people or people people people up. People are. People are. I'm the podcast.

I think what you're describing here. The Rasa. I think the attitude for this type of party is more of a me casa, me casa. Yes. Yeah. I mean, there are like designated rooms you can go in when you go to someone's house Like don't cross a threshold unless it's a threshold to the bathroom if there's an actual doorway You kind of can't go through that to my mind. Yeah, when you're in the bathroom. There's also a threshold over like the cabinet. Yeah, you can't go through thrown. Yeah, you can't go through thrown tho th. Yeah, tho tho tho tho tho thr. Yeah, thrown. Yeah, thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown thrown. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Don't go. Don't go the the thro. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go. Don't go thrush. Don't go thr. Don't go thr. Don't go tho. Don't go tho. Don't go tho. Don't go tho. Don't go tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. to tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. the tho. the throoo. the the thro. the thrthat more than once. Just once, a quick look when you first get there, don't keep going back to it. Don't take too much.

Don't move stuff around a lot. And if you do, you have to put it back. You open it up and you take a photo on your iPhone to look at later and also so you can put things back after you're done with your nice little rummage. Hmm, interesting, what problems do we have here? Dr Vinnie says it's also a bad move for the host to appoint someone to poor without letting that person know what is okay and what's not poorer to blame. If I may, a volunteer is by their very nature not appointed. Because they volunteered. If there are any... Don't touch me.

Wines. They should be kept far away from the revelry, if possible. Lock the wine cellar? I don't know what's to tell you. Yeah, I'm gonna be honest, my drinks are not split up into can and can't drink areas. I mean, this is my alpha red wine. It was the first pressing and it's near mint. It's in, I've sleeved the bottle, no one's to touch it.

I think the way you get around this is just by not having the nice things. Yeah, yes. Or share them with your friends. What's the way you get around this is just by not having the nice things. Yeah, yes. Or share them with your friends. What's the point of being alive if you're not thrilling your friends with the things that you have? And even then what's the point? Let's linger on that thought for a while. Yeah, let's really dig in.

Can I just do a little exercise here. I'm going to enter into my mine palace and I don't think I've been around to your house for three or four months maybe. Hey Ben, just a quick question. Are we all also invited into your mine palace? Yeah, please step on it. Oh, here I come. I prefer if you guys stay outside. Vampire style you need permission to come in there, I believe. Now Theo having not been your house in three or four months, I don't know the current state of your refrigerator. I don't know the current state of your alcohol collection. But if you were to say subdivide your collection into hands off and hands on, I'm going to say the amount of stuff you have to divide up is you have one, I'm going to say half to four seventh full bottle of Talaska Sky, maybe, or Talaska Storm. You are dead on. I do have about one quarter left of a Talaska Sky bottle. That's Father's delight. Yeah. And then you perhaps have, I'm going to say like, two or three great northern zeros, so not alcoholics. One. Okay, and then maybe, like in the fridge, in your little weird bottle cooling thing

that you have at the top of the fridge part of your fridge, like four bolters or something maybe? I'm down to zero. Fuck, God damn. I might have like half of a bottle of gin in the cup somewhere. Oh, I would not like that one at all. Shotgun, half of that great northern zero. Yeah, you guys have to share, but you can make a good shandy out of it. So when people are coming around, you're being like, hey, this part of this, you cannot touch, but the rest of it, it's all yours, to like three things. Yeah, yeah. Maybe if I want th th th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. tho. the. th. th. th. th. th. th like three things. Yeah, maybe if I want to drink the 0% beer

later on or whatever. My drinks that I would class as on limits are the ones inside my house. Yeah. Because basically I would say that the overwhelming majority of the things we have are things that I could go and buy more of. Yeah, yes. Oh, they're fungible? Yeah, I'm fungin' them. Dr Vinny says, it sounds like everyone's heart was in the right place until it all went wrong. It's not. They're all, they're all like... It sounds like an incredibly transactional party that doesn't... I don't know, you guys go ahead and keep doing whatever you're doing. Every single one of the people inside this house would drive a tank through a shanty town if it meant getting like a slightly old pino noir. Yes.

Or just if it was on the way? Or if they had nothing on. Yeah, or if it was slightly out of the way and they were bored on the drive. It was nice for the host to throw a party. It was nice to the host to throw a party brackets at which they solicited gifts that were not to be shared. Well, I, hold on. Hold the phone. All right. If we rewind, selector to the start of the letter. the person says that that th th they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they thi they thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the th the th. the the th. the thi the the they thi they thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the thi the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeat. thooooooooooooooooooooooo. the. the phone. All right. If we rewind selector to the start of the letter, the person says that they bought a bottle of wine to share, but when they went to get a glass of that wine,

the wine had been all drunk up by all the guests. And they said, hey, volunteer poorer, that well-known position of the party. The veep, hey, veepy. Can I get a g a a a a the glass a the glass a the glass a the glass a the glass a the glass a the glass a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the th. th. th. the th. th. the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the person, the person. the person. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thea. thi. theau. thoooooo thea thea tho tho thea tho thea. the. the. the. the party. The Vip, we call them. The Veepe, hey, Veepey. Can I get a glass of wine? And they fucked off to find some wine, right? So I think that the person who bought the wine is completely folters, right? You bought wine to share?

The wine was shared, and in the sharing attitude said, hey, I don't fucking that that wine has been drunk, but I'd like a glass of wine. And they got one, you know? I don't feel they've done anything wrong here, personally. And they might have even said, ooh, that's a nice drop when they got some of this cunts fancy wine. Yeah. Is that something you would say when you drink a glass of wine? What does everyone say when they drink a glass of wine?

Yummy, yummy. Yummy, yummy. I say, that's nice. I rarely drink wine, personally. I will occasionally have a glass of red wine, and then quietly saying to yourself, what was that one? What was that one? A red? So you'd be holding a glass of red wine and then quietly saying to yourself,

so it's like a red? Yeah, I'm hoping the people are impressed. I noticed. Oh, my god really knows his wine. Or I will go to a nice restaurant and I will get the wine pairing and say, you choose the wine for me. Oh, that's such a good move. Yeah, we that's. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, we. Oh, we. Oh, we. Oh, we. Oh, we. Oh, we. Oh, we. Oh, we that's. Oh, we that's. Oh, we're. Oh, we're. Oh, I. Oh, I. Oh, I. Oh, I. Oh, I that's. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I that's. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm. Oh. Oh, I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Oh, I. Oh, I. Oh, I. Oh, I. Oh, I'm. Oh, I'm th. Oh, I'm th. Oh, I'm th. Oh, I'm th. th. th. thoo. thoooo. th. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th's a nice experience to me. The only acceptable behavior for this host is to like stumble half cut down the steps. So let's see what we got down for you fuckers.

So they're like, there's no, yeah. That's the problem with wine. And this is going to come from an incredible place of privilege. I know I get to live a relatively comfortable lifestyle, but this is the technique that you hopefully can one day afford to live using, live by, is that you buy a like 20 something dollar bottle of wine as the real nice one that you're bringing to the dinner party. And you also bring like a couple of like $10 bottles of wine because after that you've gone through the 20 something dollar one and you've all gone, oh that's very, um,

it's got a very good body to it. Yeah, it's that sort of black forest kind of fruits at the end? Yeah, it's wonderful. Then you go, all right, cunts, who wants a fucking, this guy? Yeah, you know what it'd be good? More. Yes. Who wants some wine-flavored red. Yeah, you guys want to get whined out a little bit? This one tastes like you're going like a... Ugh.

Mmm. Say you're in someone's, you're a guest and you're in, you're in their cellar and they're down there with you, and you've just bricked them up, uh, in the wall there. Do you get... Like Thomas the Tanking style? Do you get to, like Thomas the Tank Engine, do you get to take the Amontadillo, the cask of a Montadillo? Is that, is the etiquette that you get to share that? When you're bricked in? And I think it is Amontiato. It is. Yes. The Amontadillo? This was like a really good ratchet up all the monodil bit. Hearing that reference and going the Thomas the Tank Engine. Yep. Doing the reference but getting the name of what the thing is wrong.

And then Tom, who I guess went to private school. It's not that I went to fucking private school, which I did. It's so good when someone's smarter than you and you can tear him down a little bit. Hey, hey, I'm not smarter than you and you can tear him down a little bit. Hey, hey, I'm not smarter than you. Sorry, I just don't one word. Balls pictures. Yeah, you got, hey, check on, let's all click on that guy's nasty cock and balls again. I'm going to go out now.

Stop. Stop. He's got a very visible pimple on his nutsack as well, which is very unpleasant. Well, it's a very high-resolution photo. It certainly is. So yes, that's my opinion. If you want to have a party with your friends and drink a bunch of wine and there's wine in the house, don't be surprised when the wine gets drunk. Yeah, I think it's an ingrown hair.

Yeah, the ingrown hair on your scrotum and all the sperm gathering around it like it's the obelisk from 2001. Oh, that's no good. Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who's? ? I'm trying to figure out what size Allen key he's used to fasten this big ball weight closed.

Yeah. Yeah, it's got set screws. Well, we'd have to know the size of his penis and balls for scale to figure out the size of that. I mean this dick is what, like eight, ten inches long? If it is, it's 25 inches wide. And that's a really good joke we can all share if you all could see the penis that we're looking at currently while recording this podcast. It's as long as a long nose.

Oh man, this is... I don't actually think there's like that much foreskin. I think that the weight of the weight is also pulling everything down around the ears. That's my medical opinion. Oh, you've got to, it's the iceberg theory of where this guy's ticks. Yes. God, the skin is so angry. Wouldn't you be? Wouldn't you be? Wouldn't you be? I'd be fucking upset. God damn. Dr. Vinny says, Hey, there's certainly nothing wrong with being at a party,

agreed, and asking for a glass of wine. There is the way I do. Dr. Vinny says, for me, Dr. Vinny, the situation falls off the rails with the scolding email. Even if the host is frustrated or disappointed, and even if he actually thinks your friend had planned a long con to be invited to the party just to pilfer a glass of fancy wine from his cellar, there's no way to walk back an accusation like that. I gotta admit I've never accused anybody of oceans-elevening my wine.

But again, you don't have fancy wine. So your wine just gets taken rather than, you know, it doesn't have a, like a plot. Yeah. You know what's weird is this genuinely reminds me more of, um, like the, of, I'm trying to think of the right way to word this the paranoid bo-guarding nature of the deep marijuana addict like like like the person who oh my god yeah sorry I just I was like fucking hell something's really happening down like I was just really afraid I was like fuck I might have to stop the record and go check on something because there's this horrible s-haughing something the sound of the thousand thousand the of the the the the thi thi thu thi thu thi tho tho thi the thi the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho the tho the the tho the tho thea thea thea thean tho the the the the the the the the the was like, fuck, I might have to stop the record and go check on something.

Because there was this horrible sounds just coming out. And then I just quickly checked my Gmail and I see that Demi has used the shared card to rent Saw the final chapter. Oh, Christ love. So that's what that is. OK, sorry. The most horrible screams in the the world are omitting from the television downstairs. That's what it's like in Sydney, you know, you think maybe someone is being murdered

with an extravagant trap. Yeah, well, yeah, maybe Demi is in a trap or maybe someone's trying to get her to take Panadol when she has a headache. Which is another thing to respond in that way. You have a headache. There's one way to fix it. To take the prescribed amount of paracetamol. No! It'll make you feel better. There's literally no reason not to take it. Imagine a caring jigsaw. All your life you have struggled with imposter syndrome. I have locked you in a room with a typewriter, enough ink for a novel, and your own badass self. Oh, check this. No, I've got something for this. So I got... So I was, uh, I was whipping open my old mental health care plan

because I wanted to get a referral to the old head maintainer, but I needed to find out something from inside and they'd stapled it all up and I present to you on page, this is past the page that says, History history of anxiety plus plus they've put there. Here we go, it does. He started anxiety twice over. Just scrolling past all this sort of stuff. Family History, Depression, set up parents for us.

Check this out. Appearance and mood. Appropriate dress and grooming, good eye contact. I'm fucking coasting on this for like five years. I have never had anybody tell me that I make good eye contact. As far as I know, I make perfectly adequate eye contact, but for 37 years, I have presumed that my eye contact has been poor. I've just assumed that my eye contact has been poor. I've just assumed that I wasn't looking people in the eyes.

But now you have a note from teacher that says... Now I've got a note from the teacher and it says... Good eye contact. Appropriate dress and grooming, good, I'm glad I took the staple out of this. What's being appropriately dressed for the therapist? That you're not all, no, that you're not all fucked, like it's not a, they're not, this is for the doctor to the therapist saying like, you know, if they come in, if I was to come in in shambles, it would be representative of my life falling apart. Dressed like Kathy from the comic, yeah.

No, not me. Doesn't seem to own any kind of shorts that go past the knee. Indicative of severe depression. Horribly stained sweatpants. That is huge. Speech seems normal. Speech seems normal. Speech seems normal. And have you ever heard anything more encouraging?

Risk to others, little or bonus. I can't hurt you, I'm like a little bug. Oh, he's a friendly little guy. He's just a guy. Come on. Don't worry about him. As the you. This guy? We let him hold a gun just to keep the handle warmth when I want to hold it.

He's not going to use it. He wouldn't know how. The trigger pull is simply too heavy. You're pulling on the trigger with both hands like you're trying to open the fridge door after it's closed. I'm like, pointing up at any other thrown at the barrel. I want that. I want's closed. I'm like pointing up at any other that's around at the barrel. Be like, ah, I want that. Wanting?

Wanting? Gun, gun, gun, mouth. Gun, gun, mouth. Eat-bang, Theo. Chew, Theo gone mouth. Eat bang, eat bang Theo. Oh, I just opened the tab and saw the dick again. That's gotta be an episode of Buda Vista. I think this is very much technically bit an episode of the podcast.

Buntilissa. Thank you so much for joining us, Tom. This is very much technically an episode of the podcast. Wotterosa. Thank you so much for joining us, Tom. Tom, have you got any new projects coming up? Ah, yeah. Quickly, think of one for me. Name one project, Tom. Well, I'm doing the Twitch stream. We're going to be touring a show next year, probably all things working out.

And check up Big SoftTita.Png the podcast with Demi as well as the YouTube channel that I have which is Tom Walker the fuck is it yeah it's just Tom Walker and you can go over there and check out the for example the the compilation I made of all the penis injuries that were collated when I was pulling from the big injuries that were co-related when I was pulling from the big database of penis injuries as a reward for giving two US dollars on my stream. That one's been a discord hit. Find it all at Tom Walker is Good.

That's right. Thank you very much that beautiful website, Andrew. Teehehe. Have a lovely evening, if it's not evening currently, wait until it is. And then have a lovely time then. We'll see you next week. Bye bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye. you