Boonta Vista - EPISODE 373: Live Scared And Die Alone

Episode Date: November 23, 2024

Lucy, Andrew, and Ben bring you: Turning an industrial accident into a failed assassination attempt, a good-natured Minnesotan child with the gift of prophecy, and a visit from one of Hollywood's most recognisable faces. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Hello and welcome to Buntavista, episode 373. I am Ben and I'm here on a walking tour of the historic pubs of Scroot-upon-Gunt. These pubs, often run by the married couples and families who would live upstairs, offer locals not only a place to shed their cares after a hard day's work down the local asbestos mines, but also a third place to socialize with their community and catch up on the news of the village. Appear on your right, made clear by the cane and top hat on its sign there, it's the Foppish Nantes, built back in 1562 and rebuilt, of course, in 1867 after the fire. Directly across from that you'll find the flattened todger dating back to the early 1700s.

Rebuilt of course in 1867, 1902, 1927, 1935 and 2018 on account of the fires. And here we of course have the balmy flasher and immediately adjacent, the dogging husband, both built around 1750 and both currently ablaze. But it's just a short stroll down to one of the oldest pubs in our humble village, The Felching Pegger. And there's the landlady, whistling on her way to work with a smile and a jerry can. It's Lucy.

Hi Lucy. Hello love. Hello love, you all right? You all right. Also with us, having just burnt down the cuckolded cum pig, it's Andrew. Hi, Andrew. Hello, hello, hello. Hello, mate. What's all this then? You accusing me of burning something down? So I was kind of thinking that a lot of pubs in England, it's always in their history, there's a bit where they got burnt down and

often they have funny names. And that gave us the walking tour of pubs intro. Hey. In Scrotepon-Gunt. And I've never left Scrotepon-Gunt in my whole life. It's a beautiful place. A very small country and I've never been anywhere else. No. What else would you need? New pub. Everything's there. Another pub. Because the pubs are all currently on fire. We need another few.

Everything's there, another pub, because the pubs are all currently on fire. We need another few. Man, I was reading the news stories this morning before we recorded it, as I want to do, and I was just really enjoying that there is a specific phenomenon in the English tabloids, a tabloid phenomenon, you might say. This is not a segue. Where, because they're just like scraping stories from social media and stuff, they take their photos from people's, like Facebook pages and Instagrams and stuff.

And oftentimes there'll just be a story about something happening to or done by an English woman in her like thirties or forties. And the lead image is just the most unbelievably face-tuned photo you've ever seen in your entire life. Like I was showing one to Maddie this morning where the woman just had no facial features. Like it is just a sort of beige blur, but with the like digital mascara added on. So good. Doing the, doing the Callista Gingrich, huh? Yeah. Particular British woman sort of behavior. It's so funny. Facetuning.

It's also like, uh, for whatever reason, that's a thing that a British woman in her thirties would do, but an American woman in her sixties would do. Yeah, you're right. It's kind of fascinating to me because, um, like this is obviously a thing that happens to people when they get cosmetic surgery, right? Like, you know, you, you get a facel to people when they get cosmetic surgery, right? Like, you know, you get a face lift, you get some fillers, you're getting smoothed out and everything.

And the further you go down that road, the more your self image changes and you go, you like lose touch with what a human face looks like. Yeah. And I want to go a little further. And now this looks normal to me and I want to go a little further. But I'm equally fascinated by people who are doing that with the digital mirror in their phone. Who are just going, no, not quite normal yet. Not normally. Smoother. Smoother. I want to look like a cloud. I want to look like a sentient cloud. I want to look like the baby son from Teletubbies.

Just like a haze. I want to be one of the energy clouds from Star Trek. Yes. Just pure aura, all aura. I want to look like the big, uh, the big crystal thing that talks to them in the base in Power Rangers. Yes. That's your... Just want to be eyes and lips in a, in like a white void.

Perfectly smooth. I want to, I want to appear to have like one polygon. It's actually really appealing when you put it that way. I might facetune the hell out of my face of my face and make that my blue sky profile picture. Put some posts on the Puta Vista Instagram of yourself. People need to be updated on a day in the life of a podcaster. That's true. People love that one. Yeah, I'll do that and I'll really face tune it.

Blast it. You want to see all the pixels around you all fucked up too. Yeah, hold perfectly still so that I don't move and lose the filter. Hey, burning down a historic pub, that's probably a crime. We talk about crimes in Crime Watch. Please put down your weapon. You are in direct violation of penal code 113 section 9. You now have 5 seconds to apply for your... Help me! Help me! No! No! No! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHH AHHHH A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A This comes to us from WJTV in Mississippi. The Japanese television. That's right.

Texas woman sentenced for hiring Memphis couple to murder Mississippi woman. Oh, that's a crime now. Well, look, Ten Commandments, which as we all know, America is based on. Yes. Right? If you ask any American, what are all your laws based on? They'll say Magna Carta, 10 commandments. I actually think this one is illegal. You're not allowed to hire a Memphis person to murder someone in Mississippi.

Yeah. Murdering a person. It's murdering a person. It's a very common law. It's a very common law. Yeah. person to murder someone in Mississippi. Yeah, murdering. But like what's one of those commandments? Thou shalt not kill. And she wasn't going to kill anyone. Just keeping her hands clean. You know? Yeah. Like that's finesse. A Dallas Texas woman was sentenced to 10 years in federal prison for

her partner murder for hire conspiracy that if successful would have resulted in the death of a South Haven Mississippi woman in 2022. According to the United States Attorney's Office, Ashley Grayson, 35, ran an internet-based business and in 2021, she had a falling out with a woman from South Haven who operated a similar business. Two Etsy pages. It's 100% two Etsy pages. I thought it was going to be like a husband affair or something. It's literally just a rival Etsy business. It's actually even better than that. You'll find out. Reports say Grayson suspected that the woman was creating fake online content criticizing

her and her business. The two women never met in person. That's so cool. Oh my God. That's fucking cool. Oh my God. That's fucking unhinged. It's sick cause this woman's not old enough to know about like swatting. And she just went straight to,

I guess the only thing available to me is to hire a hitman. Hire a killer? To fucking kill you. To hire a married hitman team, hit wife and hit husband. Hit wife and hit husband. To hire Mr. and Mrsus Smith from that movie. Love hit wifeing.

Yes, I see. Couple of plays together stays together, you know? And well, no, but also do what you love, never work a day in your life. Correct. Yes. But sometimes go to jail. Never mixed pleasure in business. Unless pleasure is your business.

Grayson reportedly asked the couple to kill three people. A South Avon woman, Grayson's ex-boyfriend, and a Texas woman who had recently made negative social media posts about Grayson. Oh my god. That's so cool. That's what it could be like. And while I'm here, while I've got you know what yeah, just one more Getting murdered for that. That's rough. Yeah, it's rough. I agree You gotta imagine this woman has like a close circle of friends that at no point said oh

I think you might have actually gone too far with this one Like you know that every time she was like this bitch. I'm gonna fucking kill this bitch. Yeah Yes You know that every time she was like this bitch I'm gonna fucking kill this bitch. Yeah Yeah, you see this comment? I'm gonna kill her. Yes. You should kill her. Yes. Yes. Yes. Exactly. Exactly. Have a cocktail? Yes. I reckon one of her friends was about to say You know what? This is a bit over the top I think you need to like pull your head in and everything After the second person when she said the second person she was gonna kill they were gonna say you're going too far You're acting fucking crazy.

And then she said, and I'm going to throw in just one person who made night'll comment on social media. And they were like, maybe I'm not going to say anything. Because apparently the barrier for entry to this list is quite low. Is being rude. Yeah, rudeness. Yeah. Uh, she was willing to pay the couple at least $20,000 per killing, according to the US Attorney's

Office. Imagine leaving a comment so devastating, someone paid 20 grand to kill you. To have you dead for it. Yeah. Wow. Surely like, you know that time when everyone was using Twitter, like celebrities and politicians, and they were all reading their own posts? I bet a few of the wealthy and powerful definitely successfully pulled this off. One guy got a really good burn off against some Republican

Senate or whatever, and he just gave some white supremacist militia guy with a shotgun $100,000 to kill a rude commenter. I mean, it seems like it doesn't cost that much money, particularly within like the rap beef community these days. I don't know how closely either of you follow local rap scenes and their beefs in the United States. That sounds like a real Andrew thing to do. Yeah, not-

More of an Andrew vibe. But people, I think people my age have this conception of like, ooh, in the 90s when it was like East Coast, West Coast beef at Tupac got killed and Biggie got killed. That was crazy. People are getting killed so frequently over rap stuff now. And like guys where it's like he had one mixtape out and has been slain by his opponent after accidentally revealing his location on Instagram live. Like just having a recognizable hotel behind you and somebody turns up 10 minutes later and kills

you and then they post about how they successfully killed you. What if we got killed by a rival podcast? Yeah. What if Tom and Demi paid someone to kill us? What if Tom and Demi paid someone 20,000 US dollars? I'm going to make it look, I'm going to make a request right now. I don't want to put them on blast. Tom, Demi, please don't have us killed. We're not going to put a hit out on you guys.

No. Yeah. Unless we think we have to, to get it done first before you can put a hit out on us. Do we need to preemptive strike Tom and Demi? We should just have someone on a retainer, perhaps. Just like on the go. It's like a hitman on standby. On call.

He's on standby. Yeah. He's just like on a, I don't know exactly where they live, but I reckon if we get a hitman with a, like a sniper rifle on the roof of maybe the Guzman and Gomez in Newtown. Yeah. If we get Glenn Powell Hitman on the roof of a Guzman and Gomez. I reckon we got a chance. They got to be around Newtown sometime, right?

Everyone goes to Newtown. They're pretty recognisable people. Tom really stands out in the crowd. On account of his enormous. So don't fuck with us, Tom. I know you're listening to this. Sick of your shit, stop trying to kill us. It's like they say, all roads lead to new town. Yes.

They do say that. I don't know how much I thought like I'm hit would cost, but 20 grand doesn't seem like very expensive or like worth it to do a murder. It's not very expensive. I kind of feel like the consequences are sort of potentially less bad for her, the woman who commissioned the killing, because like she got caught and she's going to go to prison for like 10 years for trying to kill multiple people. Whereas the trade-off for the killers is if you like like number one, you

have to do a murder. Although as we've established, it's kind of what keeps their marriage humming. But you've got to do multiple a year. If you're only getting 20 grand per murder, you're like minimum five per year and you're not even living lavishly at that point. It's like professional fighters, you know, you hear, oh, they got a $50,000 bonus for finishing that fight. And it's like, yeah, but you know, then there's how many times a year are you killing someone? Like, do you have to travel? Are you paying for your own airfares? Do you got to cover the hotel? Are you paying taxes on that? You know? Probably, probably not the tax.

Probably not the taxes. But then you've also got to have some other way of explaining your income to the dang IRS. Am I right? Yeah. Guy comes knocking, Will Farrell comes knocking and he says, hi, I'm here to audit you. And you go, fuck, God, I hope we form a beautiful romance. So if you get caught for being the Etsy murderer, you will probably go to jail forever if you've murdered somebody and been paid to do it. And if you get away with it, you get $20,000 and then you've got to split that with your wife. Oh true yeah. Really it's like $10,000 each for a murder you know. Yeah I'd want more. Yeah. It's like not it's not enough to like buy a secondhand Honda Civic you

know. Even just covering your expenses you're not coming out particularly ahead, but also there's the psychological trauma of ending a man's life or a woman's life. And the danger, like you want an extra fee for the danger of it, right? Because you're putting your own life at risk. You're not getting any health insurance from the hitman job, I don't think. No, but maybe for these guys, you know, the, the action is the juice, you know? The action is probably the juice for these guys. Maybe the money's just a bonus.

Maybe they're really successful already. And they're like, but the only thing that makes me feel alive is putting a plastic bag over the head of a lady who said, your crocheting skills are C-minus. Yes. Your fulfillment times that leave something to be desired. Kill her! Kill that bitch! On September 10th, the Memphis couple recorded a call to Grayson where she confirmed that she wanted the South Haven woman killed as soon as possible.

Stating that if the couple carried out the killing in the next week, she would award them an extra $5,000. Not that much. She's handing out bonuses. Also, I don't know if this couple are real hit people because they recorded the call and they took it to the authorities. I was thinking that. Are they fake? I think they might be hitman style hitmen. This is a Glenn Powell situation. It's a Glenn Powell situation.

These guys are philosophy lecturers or whatever. I've really been meaning to watch that movie. And they're kind of hot with it. It's a Glenn Powell situation. It's a Glenn Powell situation. These guys are philosophy lecturers or whatever. I've really been meaning to watch that movie. And they're kind of hot with it. It's pretty fun. It's like pretty good. I really enjoyed myself. It's fun. It's a good time.

All I need is for a movie to be fun. He's good. He's hot and she's hot. The bisexuals delight that film. You love it. Reports say the couple sent Grayson a photo of police lights from an unrelated incident and stated that they had tried to kill the woman but were unsuccessful. They then demanded $10,000 for the attempt, which was half the promised price.

Are they hitman scammers perhaps? You got hit scammed. Is this a hit scam? You got duped by the assassins. That's why the hit's so cheap, right? Because you're actually not getting 20 grand. You're scamming your way into 10 grand. You're sitting there thinking, oh, that's quite affordable actually.

And then bam, hit scammed. Yeah. If you are not paying, you are the product. You are. Yeah. How funny is it to just like take a photo of some flashing police lights and be like, oh man, it went crazy. Can I have 10 grand?

Can I have $10,000? Oh no, the police arrived and asked me to stop killing her. and be like, oh man, it went crazy. Can I have 10,000 dollars? Oh no, the police arrived and asked me to stop killing her. Getting like a stock photo of a crime scene that still has the Getty Images watermark on it. Yep, went mad, oh went south. That bitch is dead. Yeah.

She is in the fucking ground. Sending them the meme of the little girl standing outside the house on fire and going, oh, didn't work out. Everything's gone sideways. Had to burn that shit down. Going dark, going to Venezuela. Please send me my 10 grand. The couple fluted Alice and collected the $10,000 from Grayson and her husband. Oh, they actually got the 10 grand. They got the 10 large for like sending a photo. That's hustle.

That's fucking hustle. That's so good. And hey, what are they guilty of? Certainly not murdering anyone. The police wouldn't let them keep the 10 grand, right? Probably not. Probably not. I'll tell you what happened.

The police would go, oh, we're a civil asset forfeiture. We'll take that. Yeah. And then these guys, oh, we're a civil asset forfeiture. We'll take that. Yeah. And then these guys, because they are actually killers, they go rebel ridge on them, because that's what you do when someone civil asset forfeits you. Yes. We have a new framework for understanding civil asset forfeiture and action movies. Hey, thank you, uh, make and Blair. Make and Blair. No, the other guy, Jeremy Sarnie for teaching me about civil as Lucy. You're going to fucking love rebel Ridge. All right.

Also the lead actor is like the most aesthetically pleasing man who's ever existed. I think so beautiful to watch him do stuff. British guy that I haven't seen in anything. It's hot as fuck. And he, he moves in a very beguiling way. It makes you go- It's not lethal combat skills. Aaron Pierre.

Aaron Pierre. Aaron Pierre. Wow, if he can take control of the situation like this, imagine the ways he could take control of other situations. Shhh. I had piercing eyes on that guy too. James Cromwell. Now we're talking.

Now we gotta move. Oh yeah. Oh fuck, I forgot it's gotta be James Cromwell. Now we're talking now. We got a oh, yeah Yeah, I'm Johnson doing great work in there I didn't even recognize um What's that kid's name that I can't remember? Yeah He's got a silly name. He's got a silly name, but uh, he's been in a bunch of other stuff like the place beyond the pines Yeah, he was he's one of the one of the kids in that, uh, grown up. And I did not recognize him at all until somebody pointed it out later. Check out rebel ridge and also the place beyond the pines.

I enjoyed that too. Hmm. Uh, in March, 2024, the case went to trial where Joshua Grayson was acquitted by jury and Ashley Grayson was found guilty as charged. That's so good. You got a guilty wife, innocent husband situation? In the slammer. Was it just the wife?

Imagine finding out your wife did this and being like, oh, Ashley. Ashley, come on. I told you, you just got to stop reading the fucking comments. Just turn it off. Just turn your phone off. Literally turn your phone off. Just close your eyes. Ashley was sentenced on October 31st.

Ooh. 120 months in federal prison and three years of supervised release. 120 months. Emory Cohen is the actor. I could not remember the name of him. Okay, thanks. He, I'm sorry, but if we were to briefly take a look at Emory Cohen's IMDB page, I got to say that is one of the least flattering photos of the actor. I don't think I've ever seen this guy before.

I have seen. He was in Roof Man, his upcoming American crime drama. Oh my goodness. It's, that's not how I would want a photo of me to look where I an actor on there. Hold on, I'm just putting it, just putting it in a chat for you. That's not great. It's not great.

Oh, he looks very thoughtful. He does, but like just the little, the way his little neck fold is hanging off his finger there. Little artificial double chin. That'd make me feel bad to see that photo of myself. You know? Great actor though. We could fix that for him.

We gotta get in there, find a better public domain photo of Emory Cohen. Yeah, face tune. Let's face tune that chin. You face tune him hard enough, you won't be able to see any of those folds at all. It'll just be one smooth, perfect plane. One perfect orb that is impossible

to criticize or compliment. This was a 21st century crime where online feuds and senseless rivalries bled into the real world. The defendant tried to hire someone to murder a woman over things that happened exclusively on the internet, said acting US attorney, Reagan Fondren. Uh, fortunately, no one was physically hurt in this case, but the victim and her family still felt a severe and emotional impact as a result. Yeah. Imagine finding out that someone had taken a hit on you because of your, like, internet comments. You'd be like, well, I come in, I left like two years ago where I was like,

Oh man, are you buying these? I don't think you're making them. Yeah. I've found this Ashley Grayson woman. Oh, I've got some stuff in there. All right. It's actually, she's not kind of what I expected to be honest. No, it's odd, right?

Yeah. Um, so this is, uh, a bit more detail on this, this story, or this is an excerpt from a story from the Atlanta Black Star, which is a sort of like black focused news organization. Cool name. Yeah. Grayson and her husband Joshua were criminally indicted in July, 2023 for the plot. Federal prosecutors alleged the Mississippi based couple contacted contract killer, contract killer in Tennessee between August and September,

and paid that individual to murder a person identified in the federal indictment as DH. That individual was not harmed. Grayson earned widespread popularity after reportedly making $1 million in less than an hour after launching her online business, Digital Course Recipe, in 2021, through which she taught people to turn their passions into a profitable online course. Pyramid scheme. Yeah. I wonder how much of this involves you also starting your own course.

I wonder. Yeah. So this is just that classic, like we've talked about this extensively, the type of business hustle where the business, what you're selling is teaching people to do the business hustle that you are doing. Yeah. I make six figures in a minute and I'll teach you how to do it. Yeah. And then you never really thinking about like, well, if everyone's selling business

hustles, who's buying them. What is the business? What is the, what is the, any of this for? Why is the money moving around? Yeah. What are the good or service that's being provided? That's being provided. Yeah.

So yeah, she's a real like entrepreneur kind of woman. Yeah. She's like a LinkedIn husband, a LinkedIn entrepreneur hustlers. The Christian LinkedIn entrepreneur hustlers as well. Big strong Christian vibes in all this. What furthered her online stardom was her lavish proposal to Joshua Grayson, which featured a performance from R&B singer Monica on a yacht. Oh my God, okay.

Videos and pictures of the event went viral, which earned a couple of massive social media following. The year after their engagement, allegations started circulating that the success of Ashley Grayson Garnett from her online business was greatly exaggerated and that the money she made was actually from a worker's compensation settlement after she lost a finger at an old job. Oh my God. That's so fair.

We've all been there. So she took that lost finger and she turned it into an opportunity. She did. And she turned that opportunity into a million bucks. That's hustle. That is hustle. In 2022, Grayson filed a defamation lawsuit against a financial coach named Derricka Harwell, alleging that a comment Harwell posted under one of Grayson's Facebook posts was false,

defamatory, and injurious. Was it saying that she doesn't make that much money? Yeah, that and also, if I'm remembering correctly, I'm pretty sure Derica posted a comment saying that she had to take out a restraining order against Grayson as well. And the defamation was that actually Grayson was saying it was defamatory to suggest that she was a stalker. Now, so it seems pretty clear that this is Derek Harwell that they're talking about. And my suspicions are somewhat confirmed based on an Instagram post that Derek Harwell,

who is also a Christian hustlefluencer, this is something she posted two days ago when I did the notes. Two days ago. A situation occurred and my family and I had to temporarily leave our totally custom built main home of six bedrooms, six bathrooms, in-home gym, built-in classroom, et cetera. Very subtle. It's so good. This is such a funny thing to post.

These people are evil. All of these people are evil. And we had to leave our custom built six bedrooms, six bathrooms, in-home gym. Well, they had to leave that to temporarily live in one of our much smaller homes. Five bedrooms, three baths, no gym, no double living rooms, no classroom, no real space for our family of eight. Too many kids. That's a lot of kids. Too many of them.

Instead of complaining, we thanked God that in our time of need, we had someplace to go. Thank God we had our second smaller house. Instead of complaining about our smaller house that only has five bathrooms, oh sorry, three bathrooms. Five bedrooms, three bathrooms. No gym. No gym. Thank God. We thank God for giving us an umbrella, umbrella emoji, to prepare for a rainy day, rain cloud emoji. Having multiple pieces of real estate is more than an online flex. It can easily

be a form of stability and or financial security. Oh, really? Oh my God. They linked in posting about someone trying to murder them. Someone trying to murder you. Here's what I learned from someone trying to murder me. Someone trying to murder you and your family. Well, probably just you and then to orphan your eight kids. Yeah.

And like, you're like, fuck, how do we, how do we tie in that our house is huge? Yeah. How do we tie in our real estate business? Fuck. Of course we're back now, but we have a stronger appreciation for our home and thankful to have options if we ever need to leave again. Also we have purchased many guns. You there is just a type of... That's incredible. You know, get that money, go for it. You know, but Jesus Christ. You people aren't human. Like these people have transcended what it means to be, but Jesus Christ. You people aren't human.

Like these people have transcended what it means to be like a human being. And they're like something else. Yeah. Like LinkedIn has left the body. Has turned them into just sort of like an aggregate of financial concepts and marketing concepts instead of like, like a person. Yeah. You're kind of just not like a person. Yeah. You kind of just not like a person anymore. Do you like, they probably still have like hopes and dreams and like fears

and like regrets and memories and stuff. They're probably mostly about like the hustle, right? It's like, I hope I can make more money from the hustle. I regret not investing in crypto earlier. They kind of exist in the shape of a human, but you know, the, the spirit, the soul, the animus of what we would consider a person has left them and they are no longer recognizable like an incredibly face tuned 60 year old.

Yes. Bring it back. That's beautiful. Yes. Like I don't, you know, it's very, it's weird to speculate about lives of strangers, which is mostly what this podcast is. It's weird to speculate about lives of strangers, which is mostly what this podcast is. It's especially weird and I think I'm pleasant to speculate about how someone would parent or be with their kids, but I do get the overwhelming impression from this that they're the sort

of people that would go psycho at their kids for ruining a photo for a post. Oh, 100%. Where they're like, you little fucking shit. Not now, mommy's hustling. Six bedrooms, six bathrooms, in-home gym. Very weird. Anyway, that's, yeah. That's quite a story.

Amazing, isn't it? You know, you're working probably by the sound of it, like a, some sort of menial job, you lose a finger and then all of a sudden you're hiring Hitman because people were rude to you. Hiring Hitman. You're like Fargo energy. Yeah. I mean, things keep rolling, you know?

Except in Fargo, it's like, I'm trying to fix my own problem, you know, instead of in this where it's like, Yeah, you didn't really have any problem. You didn't need to do that lady. I just didn't like a thing you said. You could have just enjoyed your workers combo payout and enjoyed your life. You had a boat you said. You could have just enjoyed your workers combo payout and enjoyed your life.

You had a boat proposal party. Yeah. With R&B singer. You don't need to care about what Derricka Harwell says. She probably spent all the money on the boat proposal. Probably. Maybe she's deep in the hole because of the boat. I think so.

And now that she's so far in the hole, she's like, fuck, anyone makes any bad comments and my sales start going down. We're fucked. She's so far in the hole, she's like, fuck, anyone makes any bad comments. And my sales start going down. We're fucked. I love that she's just going to jail and her husband's just like, not my problem. Ooh, I was not around for those phone calls. Shit. I was- What's my wife up to?

I don't know. I don't know. We've spent a lot of time together. I was in the den. I was actually in my man cave. I was actually hustling. I was actually on my, I was investing. To be clear, I was having an affair at the den. I was actually in my man case. I was actually hustling. I was actually on my, I was investing. To be clear, I was having an affair at the time.

I am having multiple affairs. I am never home. I'm actually not that invested in my wife. So I don't think this actually comes back to me at all. Avoiding jail when your wife is going to be there for what sounds like 10 years? That's one lucky man. He is maybe the sort of guy we would cover in a segment we call Mr. Lucky Duck. That's one lucky duck. So true.

This comes to us from KARE in Minnesota, The Care. Seven-year-old beats 89 adults in a football pool, collects $900. Okay. Woo! Hell yeah, kid. Conceived in the heart of Lakeville, born among the regulars at Babe's hometown bar, exists a hometown football pool." When I first read that sentence, I thought that they were talking about the kid.

And I was like, you don't have to say where the people in your story were conceived. That's an odd detail to include. Quote, we think we started about 10 or 11 years ago, Jane Grey says. We call it King of the Hill. Jane birthed the little NFL ball that's grown up, grown to 90 participants who each pay $10 to play. The rules are simple. Quote, you pick a team to win. And if that team wins, you move on, but you can never pick them again.

That's a fun game. Yeah, that's like a fun little thing you can do for 10 bucks down at Babe's hometown bar. Simple appeals to Kathy Rep. I've been in it a few years, she says, and I've usually got my oldest grandson. I get him in it. Starting him on a beautiful life of gambling. Of sports gambling. That's right. What could fuck you more than having a beloved family member introduce you to gambling really early on, and you have a big win and make what to you at that time is an inconceivable amount of money.

And then you are praised in the newspaper. Yeah. You got lots of like, you became a sort of cherished micro celebrity. You also associate it with just like spending quality time with your grandma. Yep. Yep. You're just having it. She passes.

Absolutely drilled into your brain that like the best thing that can happen to you is winning your sports gambling. Yeah. Kathy's grandson, Jackson is 21. Jackson's little brother, Christian is seven. Oh, at the start of this year's NFL season, for the first time, Kathy decided Christian shouldn't be excluded from the football pool. So she threw in an extra $10.

Quote, it was the last minute. I said, you know what? I'm going to put Christian into. Christian loves sports. His room is a shrine to the wild twins, timber wolves, and the green Bay packets. The latter can be too good for the Vikings. Too good for the Vikings. What's the weird, who's the Minnesota Wild? Who's that?

The hockey. Oh, of course. Sure. The latter can be blamed on his grandpa, Cathy's late husband, Kurt, a diehard Packers fan whose influence first spread to Jackson and then to Christian. But now both grandsons were in the football pool with Christian as the youngest participant ever. 89 adults and a second grader.

The first week, Christian chose the Saints. His grandmother should have. Quote, I got knocked out the first week, Cathy laughs. The second week, Christian chose the Chargers, one again. Quote, I think I saw their record, he later said. I picked the right records. Most of the adults in the pool did not choose so well. He's going to make a great gambler.

Yeah. He's already got the nose. You should, you should get him a sports bet account. He's got the knack. Yeah. He's got the gift. He's the quiz at Tatarac of like Minnesota and sports. The first week we had lost 41 and the second week we had lost 34, Jane says.

Week three, Christian picked the bills and won again. Christian's mother, Maria Amundsen, who wasn't participating in the pool herself, quickly gained interest. Quote, every week he made it further. His eyes got wider, his smile got bigger, and then we found out there were seven people left, five people left. And I'm like, whoa. Whoa. Yeah, because your son has And I'm like, whoa. Whoa. Yeah. Because your son has the gift. He's got the gift.

You got to get him a sports bed account. He's got the sight. He was born with a third eye open. You got to give him 500 bucks in a sports bed account. Get him a phone that can only call the bookies in Vegas. Yeah. Cause he's not old enough to use a phone to talk to other people. Yeah, absolutely not.

Put him to work though. Yeah. Then week four, Christian's mom nearly blew it. Quote, I put him to bed and I forgot to ask him who he wanted, she says. Maria picked the Texans for her son. By the next day she was doubting her choice. I saw they were losing with about a minute left and I thought, oh no. Then the Texan scored a touchdown to win with 18 seconds left.

I bet that felt great. Oh, she thought, oh boy, I'm never picking again. Maria laughs. Well, you pick the winner though. You didn't get a taste for it though, but like you picked the winner. So you should have. You picked the winner. Yeah.

Ooh, I got the flutter. I got the chills. At babe's bar, the news was starting to spread. I'm down to these older gentlemen, Jane says. He hasn't won yet, but I said, you're getting beat by a second grader. Don't antagonize. Don't go down there and say, hey, you Vietnam War veteran fucks. My son's fucking dominating you.

Also like kind of weird to be like kind of taking credit for it. You didn't choose the right shit. My gambling son is crushing you. like kinda weird to be like, kinda taking credit for it. You didn't choose that actually. My gambling son is crushing it. My gambling grandson. They're doing the plot of that Simpsons episode where Lisa's picking all the teams, right? Yeah, that is what it is like.

In week five, Christian picked the chiefs. Kathy saw the text from Jane on her phone the next morning. It read, your grandson Christian won $900. It was amazing, she says, still beaming more than a month later. When I think about my grandson's gambling wins, big old smile on my face. And I bet she turned around and said, Christian, you won't believe this. You won $100. $50?

Because kids don't understand how much money is worth. You got $10. That's so many lollies. Oh. Of course, with inflation in Joe Biden's America, you know, you're really, you're going to get like two Hershey's kisses for that. But still, but still.

A dollar ain't shit. And it's taxed all the hell that's what I know that's why you're getting 25 bucks good luck. It's so true. Seven-year-old had beaten all 89 adults quote I've never had to have the winner be driven by his mom to get the money Jane laughs. Yeah probably because you've never before had a child in your gambling ring. Yeah. Probably. You put a child in your gambling ring. I don't know.

Probably because he's a child. Is this illegal? I think, I don't think you could even organize like an informal pool with customers. I think you would probably be severely punished in Australia for doing that. Jane and her husband, Tom, were among the losers. Quote, I got to admit it was a little tough on the ego when I found out I did lose to a second grader. Tom says sheepishly. Tom and his friends wondered, what does a second grader do with $900? It's a good Fortnite skins.

Yeah, Fortnite skins mostly. Like V-Bucks. It's mostly V-Bucks, I'd say. A few blocks away, Christian sits in his bedroom showing some visitors at their request a wallet stuffed with bills. You got pilgrims coming to see the money, the stuffed wallet of the gifted child? Yeah, I got to see that kid's money. That's odd. That's very weird.

That's pretty strange. It's pretty strange. Hey mom, just go to my bedroom. Got a couple of people here who want to see the wallet. That's very weird. It's pretty strange. It's pretty strange. Hey mom. Just go to my bedroom Got a couple of people here. I want to see the wallet Christian's mom let him keep $200 the rest she put away for later I mean that's honestly yeah put away the girls night jar. We're going fucking crazy We're getting the margaritas. We're going up to the casino and let's just say we won't be driving home.

Yeah, it's a lot, Christian says. He did want to bring some money to church to put in an offering, Maria says. Christian tried to give Jane a $50 tip. This boy was raised right. Yeah, he was raised right. He's given money to the church. He's tipping Jane for doing such a good job. Yeah.

Uh, but the organizer of the football pool wasn't accepting. I said, Nope, that's yours. Christian, you earned that. Uh, Christian's attempts to share didn't end there. He wants to give a hundred to his brother. Christian's mother says. You're a good Minnesota boy. Good Minnesota values and a good Minnesota boy.

900 bucks. I mean, he's seven, so he doesn't really understand that like giving like a couple of hundred bucks to your older brother is like... An insane thing to do. That's like a crazy amount of money. It's cool of you though. That's super dope of you. You're tight, bro. Yeah.

You chill with me. His brother says, no, it's your money, Christian. That's your $900, seven-year-old Christian. Christian got the same response when he tried to pay his grandmother back the $10 she spent on his entry fee. Oh, what a good kid. Sweet boy. Keep it, Cathy told him.

She had a suggestion. I said, you know what? I'll put you in again next year. Man, the pressure on him is going to be so fucked. It's going to be out in the first round. It is going to be so fucked. He's going to be out in the first round. He's going to be overthinking. Biting all his fingernails off. Yeah. Punching holes in the wall.

He's knocked out in the first week. Fuck! Let him let him let him pay back the entry fee. I think that's nice. Very reasonable. He wants to do a thing that's completely sensible and appropriate. Let him do it. Like he's he's he's still going to have eight hundred ninety dollars. You know? Yeah. Let him do it. Like he's still gonna have $890, you know?

Yeah, he's learning responsibility, fiscal responsibility, and being nice to your me more. It's Eleanor's birthday next week and the girl said, can you take us to the shops so that we can use our pocket money to buy that they've saved to buy a birthday present for mom. And I said, yes, because like, you know, and yeah, you can go, Oh, I'll just, I'll pay for it or whatever. But like, I think it's a, I think it's a good value to encourage. Uh, the idea of like, you know, do doing things for other people, thinking about other people. Like that's, that's good.

And that's good stuff. Like it's what money's for, you know? Spending it on stuff. You can't take it with you. You can't take it with you. You can't take it with you. I bend down and I say into my beautiful daughter's little open face,

you can't take this shit with you when you die. You leave this earth with fucking nothing. And you never know when someone might have a hit out on you. You never know what's gonna happen. You never know when you're gonna comment hit out on you. Never know what's going to happen. You never know when you're going to comment on the wrong post. Look over your shoulder. Yeah. Never feel safe.

Never stop thinking about the end either. Don't ever have your mind on the present. Keep your head on a swivel. I want you to fucking think about the moment of departure. When you just, the life is leaving your body and you know soon that all of your memories, all of your relationships, all of your memories all of your relationships all of your experiences everything you did they will turn to fucking dust live scared

Live scared scared scared always saying they've worried about the future. Yes, I'm gonna start making gonna start making Lance Armstrong style rubber bracelets that say live scared. Live scared and die alone. Kathy says her grandson responded, grandma, I think I'm fine. We have enough money now. Well, guess what? Joe Biden's America 900 bucks doesn't go fucking anywhere. You don't have enough money. It's a woke bill. You got to pay the woke bill.

You actually owe money now. Paying for pink hair. Now you owe money. Except for piercings. Christian did spend $40 of his winnings on more sports memorabilia for his room. This time, tiny figurines of NFL players called T.D. mates. They are all he wants.

He's going to spend all his money on T.D. mates. The boy craves T.D. mates. They are all he wants. He's going to spend all his money on Teenie Mates. The boy craves Teenie Mates. That's all he wants. He's not going to care about him in six months. No, he'll have forgotten about Teenie Mates. He'll have completely forgotten about Teenie Mates. Hey, you don't play with your Teenie Mates anymore. Oh, no, because they're for babies.

They're gay. They're gay now. Teenie Mates are gay. Have you guys seen Teenie Mates? I'm looking at them now. Looking at mates are gay. Have you guys seen teeny mates? I'm looking at them now. Looking at them right now. Are they cool? I've got my eyes on them.

I've only got NBA ones. I've got to tell you, if they had like ice hockey teeny mates, I'd be all over them. They've got NFL ones. Yeah. They've got football ones. Yeah. They've got to have some sort of NHL equivalent of teeny mates, right? Hopefully.

There's NHL teeny mates. Teeny hosers. Is there? Hopefully. There's NHL Teenie Mates. Teenie hoses. Is there? Teenie hoosiers? That's right. Teenie Mates, oh, and you can get like little lockers for the players. Has their number on it? Has their little jersey on it?

The Teenie Mates, real superstar collector set. Who we got in that bad boy? Unfortunately, I don't recognize hockey players. Travis Konechny? Konechny? Are you gonna Travis Konechny Teenie Mate? They got a Travis Konechny there. Oh my God.

I thought that would be me. This 2024 set includes Connor Baddard, Igor Shesterkin, Nathan McKinnon, David Pasternak, Connor McDavid, Alexander Ovechkin. They got a Pasternak teeny, mate. Hey, they may not be recognizable names to us, but some of those hockey players, to Lucy, are celebrities. We look at celebrities in Celebrity Watch. This comes to us from the Central Oregon Daily News. Actor Woody Harrelson makes a surprise visit to Bend Vegan Restaurant.

Well, if you announce it ahead of time, that's when you put your security at risk. Yeah. True. Imagine Woody Harrelson just showing up at your local vegan restaurant. I reckon in terms of like low-key celebrity visits of like, not like someone mind blowing, but someone would be like, holy shit, a Woody Harrelson one I reckon is going to be pretty good. Yeah. Although he's someone that I would like, I would not like to bother. Yeah, true.

I'm not asking him for a photo. I don't want to bother that man. Yeah. If he's coming into the bar and he's ordering, I assume he doesn't drink. I get that vibe from him to smoke a shitload of weed. Could be wrong. Who knows? And he's like, Hey, I would like one of your house made hibiscus iced teas. I would say, Oh, sure mate. Wouldn't even say Mr. Harrison. Or of course Woody. I would be like, yeah, man. Yeah. What are you doing in

Brisbane? You American? Canadian? Yeah. You know, from around here, right? Sort of play it a little bit cool. Play it cool. I don't know. I'm not a fan. And then in the end, just as he turns away, I'll just be like, Hey bro, no country for old men. Yeah. True detective season one. He does own a spirit company. Okay, he probably drinks heavily. He gives me sober energy. He gives me ex alcoholic energy. The world's first plant powered holistic spirits company.

He's a big old vegan head, isn't he? Yeah, he is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Founded by entrepreneur Amy Holmwood and actor and environmentalist Woody Harrelson, the Holistic Spirits Co combines science, nature, and artisanal distillation to create innovative spirits that elevate the palette and the planet. I knew it. Okay.

So when he comes in the order as a double neat Eagle Rare bourbon, I say, Hey, tell you what, Eagle rare is pretty good. Maybe you want to try the mickters, Mr. Harrelson. And then bam, instantly we got a, we got a rapport going on. You got something to talk about. And here's the thing. He's going to think that you're really cool because you're just talking about the drinks, you know, you're not asking him uncouth questions about the movies he's been on. What was Javier Bardem really like? Is it true that he gave himself that haircut? Where do you get your

ideas? He doesn't want to come in there for a delicious drink and talk about work. And instead, you know, you're just providing him with a taste of the every man. And he appreciates that. That's the thing. Yeah. So hey, Hey, you know what? On the house. Don't worry about it. And then when he leaves, uh, he's straight into his phone. He's like, didn't ask me a single question about myself. Put out the hit.

You heard that thing about how his, his grandpa? His father, I believe. No, his father? I think it was his father. Was a hit man. Was a hit man. Was a hitman. He was a contract killer. He killed a federal judge.

That sounds fake. Or a state senator. Very true. Or something. I believe it was a federal judge. Lee, Harrison, hitman dad. Charles Voida Harrelson was an American contract killer and he was the father of actors Brett and Woody Harrelson. Bang, contract killer and he was the father of actors, Brett and Woody Harrelson.

Bang, bang, bang. Got it. He was convicted of assassinating federal judge, John H. Wood Jr. Well, what did John H. Wood Jr. do to deserve it? I might ask. Yeah. I think it was a revenge killing, I'm pretty sure. Yeah.

How crazy is that? Is that nuts? What kind of comment did the judge post? They are, they actually, there is a reference to that killing in the opening monologue of No Country for Old Men, which is fun, fun little bit of trivia. Salud Raw Food is a hole in the wall vegan restaurant in downtown Bend. While the business is small, it caught the eye of one of Hollywood's biggest names, Woody Harrelson. Quote, they came in yesterday and my employee who was there sent me a text letting me know. Salute owner, Corinne Cox, he said. I hate when I get a text that a celeb

is at the bar. I've had that happen a couple of times now. Maddie being like, hey, Dylan Moran is here. And I go, fuck Dylan Moran's there. I'm not there. Wow. Is it a Moran? I think it is. I thought it was Moran. I thought it was Moran.

I think you're a Morong. I would have really. I think you're a real Moran. Ooh, Wikipedia. Pronunciation here. Emphasis on the more and then whatever the upside down E means, bitch. I love looking up a pronunciation and then not understanding what it says.

Yeah. I'd love to be one of those guys that just like knows what, uh, what the key is. The fuck is the upside down E? The uh, in about or in comma? Maybe you're correct. You're sounding correct, Ben. It's happened to me before. Okay.

How else did we have? Someone else came in the other day. Oh, it's always just footy plays. That doesn't really matter. That's fine. Yeah, right. Uh, Harrelson, known for notable roles in quote, the people first, Larry Flint, no country for old men, natural born killers and more.

He's also a long time vegan. He came through saludes doors on Monday, surprising Coxie's employee. Quote they had a great conversation. He showed her a couple of card tricks. He had a deck of cards with him. Coxie said, Oh my God, you know, you know, he picked that up on Now You See Me, on the Now You See Me soon to be trilogy. Yeah, it starts doing card tricks.

Oh really? Are you serious? They're doing Now You Three Me? I believe they're doing Now You Three Me. Holy fuck. Those movies are dog shit. They're real, why would you make another one? They're very bad.

Not good. They're extremely silly, aren't they? Yeah. Yeah, they are. That's, I bet they did a like eight week intensive bootcamp during pre-production of card tricks. Yeah. Sleight of hand tricks. Mind, uh, mind twisting. Mentalism.

That sort of stuff. I'm kind of like less offended by those movies just on the basis that like, I don't think that there is any pretense that they're meant to be anything other than a stupid, like fluffy diversion. You know what I mean? They are a fluffy diversion. That's true. I think I am aggrieved by the stupid hats

in the movie. The hats. There's a lot of hats. They're putting hats on everybody. That's very true. And there's also... Hats on freaking everybody. There's also all the like set pieces where they're like, we all need to pass this card around between us to avoid detection by the dastardly Chinese or whatever. Don't clip that. It's not our opinion that the Chinese dastardly. No, it's the opinion of the filmmakers who made Now You Too Me.

I believe. I think it was in the second one. They got Dave Franco in there. There's like the 10 minute scene of them. I didn't know there was a second one. They're like flicking an access pass behind their backs and whatever to Franco in there. There's like the 10 minute scene of them. I didn't know there was a second one. They're like flicking an access pass behind their backs and whatever to get through there. I feel like I've seen that scene only. Yeah. Cause it's so silly.

It's really silly. Ooh, now you see me three due for release in 2025. Is it going to be called now you three me? November, 2025. So we know we've got, you know, and there we go, oh, are they bringing back Isla Fisher? Oh, hell yeah. All right.

So obviously he's probably a very skilled close up magician now due to his time on Now You See Me and Now You Too Me. Yep. Or he's not great, but everyone's just gotta be polite about it, cause he's so nice. Yeah. But I mean, like obviously he's getting the thrill out of it because he's carrying a deck of cards with him Yep, he loves it at all that character. Yeah, it's like what there's no

No random conversational tidbit leads you be like, you know what? I'll show you a few card tricks actually now that you mention it No one said anything. No, he's coming to be like, hey, can I have a that you mentioned it. No one said anything. No. He's coming to be like, Hey, can I have a, Ooh, it looks like you got the little vegan pulled pork sliders there. Is that Jackfruit? Jackfruit up there and he's flipping cards in his fingers, shuffling cards while he's talking to you. Oh, these, you know what? Let me do a couple of sure. Oh, I dropped the cards. Try to get this card. Nope. It's not your card. This is still not your card. Well, shit. Coxie posted a photo of Harrelson in her restaurant shortly after his visit.

Harrelson likes to salute so much. He returned on Tuesday morning where employee Aaron McDonald had the opportunity to serve him. Quote, I was kind of expecting him to come in because he came in yesterday. I was half expecting it, but not getting my hopes up in case he didn't come in. It was really cool. He's really chill, McDonald said. I was half expecting it, but I wasn't willing to give my spirit over entirely to the hope that it would happen. But when it did happen, yes. Live in fear. Don't believe what he has and will come in.

Live scared. He's not coming in. He's not coming in. Pessimism, always assume the worst. Yes. And even if he does come in, he's not gonna wanna talk to me. I'm nobody.

He'd like to do his magic tricks for me. Little old me, I'm just Aaron McDonald. I just work at the vegan shop. He probably won't show me a cool card trick. And then when he does. Yeah. If you live scared, then everything good that happens is going to be number one, really cool. And number two, such a relief because you thought something really bad was going to happen to you.

When you live scared, everything that doesn't go bad is a miracle. Yeah. The worse you think everything is going to go bad, the better it is when it doesn't, you know? So like, it's all a matter of perspective. So if your perspective is that everything that happens to you is going to be an unmitigated disaster, you are probably going to wake up in like a sore trap, you know? Yes. Want to play a game?

You lived too scared. Oh no! Shit! Every day you don't wake up in a sore trap? Miracle. Yep. A blessing. But that doesn't mean that things are going to get better from here on out either.

Keep living. Tell yourself in the mirror, I'm going to have a bad day. Yes. I am unlikable. I am fucked. I am personally fucked up. I am weird. I am not valid.

I'm strange. Everybody thinks I'm weird. I am an alien. Those studies where it turns out people like you better on average than you think they like you is true of everyone except me. Everyone hates me. Man, I was trying to Google something the other day. You just type it into the box and it's pretty easy. I was having a really hard time using the keys are so small. I don't know, something was broken on something and I was trying to find

out if it was a known problem. So I had typed in like, what's wrong with, and the first order complete is just what's wrong with me. A very sad image of like millions of people sitting at the computer just being like, what? Like what? What about me is so fucked. What do you reckon the, what do you reckon reckon the Google Adwords were on that one? Do you reckon, it's gotta be like the name of- What happens if you type that in? Like probably a- Maybe it's the name of something. What's wrong with me? And it is indeed the first one.

Oh shit. I mean, it gives you like the unblurred stuff. Oh no, there are people harvesting the fucking SEO from it. Yeah baby. You dogs. Living in a beautiful world. Like they put the question in the heading so that they can get on the top of the SEO. You fucking- What is wrong with me?

What to do if you feel this way? Jelly roll. What's wrong with me? Official audio. Jelly roll. The jelly roll. Man, this has really made me even more depressed. Oh, there's an AI answer.

I hate the world we've created. What is wrong with me? 12 lousy feelings and how to feel less broken. Written by R McDanil. This is very sad. Hey, don't type what's wrong with me into Google. Send it to us and we'll tell you. Send it to us.

Give us a detail of your problems. We'll fix them. You need to be more normal. That'll be the answer to nearly all of them. If you listen to Buntavista, the answer is probably autism. Your personality and your social skills. Leave something to be desired. I actually think you're nice. I think you're nice.

I think a little misunderstood. I think you're well intentioned. I think the overall impact is a little more. The execution leaving a little to be desired. But you've got time. You've got time left in your life to turn it around, you know, or maybe you don't. Or you don't. You probably don't. Live scared. You are worthless. Live scared. What if you don't have enough time to turn it around? What if you thought that you were going to have time to like turn it around, meet the right one for you, build a life together, start a family. Actually, the clock is ticking.

It's not too late for other people. Yeah, it's too late for you. It is too late for you. You've squandered it. You cannot respect. You're seeing other people find that before you. You're seeing other people find that five years younger than you are now. Terrifying. And you should be scared.

Live scared. Yes, live scared. According to McDonald, Salud at least doubled the amount of its daily profit following his visit and attracted several first-time customers. Got the Harrelson bump. The woody bump. He didn't really act like all uppity and whatnot that you might expect a celebrity to be.

He was normal. Should he have? I don't know if, like, if you get like a vegan wrap, you got to be like, I'm too good for this vegan wrap. So if he was a cunt, it wouldn't have been newsworthy? No, that would have been the regular celebrity behavior. Regular celebrity stuff. Well, I was standing at Celebrity Interaction, spat in my face, wedgie, came behind the bar

where he's not supposed to be, full wedgie. I am above you. I am better than you, wedgie. I am more powerful than you. I'm more influential and well-liked. Stalk my botanical vodkas. Wedgie, wedgie. We don't have a liquor license. Put me down. I am more powerful than you. I'm more influential and well-liked. Stalk my botanical vodkas! Wedgie, wedgie.

Wait, that'll never legalize this! Put me down! Honestly, if I didn't hear about him yesterday, I probably wouldn't have even recognized him, Jonathan said. What do you mean? You recognized Woody Harrelson? You recognized Woody Harrelson? Beloved actor, Woody, and amateur magician Woody Harrelson? Even if you're a fucking, like, wasn't he in the Hunger Games movies?

He's in Now You See Me 1 and 2 and soon to be Now You Three Me. And for the old heads he was in White Men Can't Jump. It's a fun movie. Everyone of every age can recognize Woody Harrelson by his fucked up face. No country for old men. you know, film bros, or lovin'. But lovin' by all. Friends with Benefits starring Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis.

And Woody Harrelson. And Woody Harrelson. And Woody Harrelson. I didn't see him on the poster for that movie, and I remember that poster. Not on the poster, in the movie. Kunis. According to McDonald, Harrelson said he and his wife

would likely return to Salud the next time they're in town. That's good to know. That's just nice. That's probably lying, but that's nice. Yeah, he's never coming back. Yeah, likely is not a promise, you know? Your jackfruit was unseasoned.

I'm never coming back. No more magic tricks from Woody Harrison. Maybe he's one of those guys who's like mad at doing an impression of meat with other food. He's like, no, let the ingredients speak for themselves. Don't try to make them simulate the byproduct of animal murder. You have disappointed Woody Harrelson. Wedgie, wedgie.

Fake meats? Oh, you got fake meats in here? Just getting a notification like a fallout that your karma has gone down. You have disappointed Woody Harrelson. Hey, this was definitely an episode of the podcast. Bunta Vista, thank you so much for joining us. We learned a lot about the world. We learned a lot about you. You learned a lot about how you should live your life in fear.

Perpetual fear. It is going to go bad and it will end soon. The brief moments of respite from your deep and crushing fear should only serve to contrast how scared you are the rest of the time. That is right. Thank you for listing. You can get twice as much of this a week for the price of a vegan wrap a month, uh, by going to patreon.com slash point of vista until then stay safe, keep your head on a swivel, keep an eye out

for Woody Harrelson and swivel just like mention like cards or magic tricks. If you're ever in conversation with it, cause then you get a little show for free. You know what I love? I love close up magic. Just mutter that to yourself. A distinctive looking Hollywood celebrity would do some magic tricks for me. I haven't seen any magic tricks in a long time. We'll talk to you real soon. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Thank you.