Boonta Vista - EPISODE 432: 12 Hours Of Shaking Your Snow Globes

Episode Date: February 8, 2026

Lucy, Theo, Andrew, and Ben bring you: A man and his 8000 snow globes, the world of the subletter, and a day-ruining attic grenade. *** Outro: Planet Golem - Wand *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Website: boontavista.com Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

I'll do it. Just try and stop me. Just try and stop me. Hello and welcome to Porta Vista episode 432. I am Ben and look, sometimes we just don't have an intro. I've been doing two of these a week for eight and a half years and sometimes, you know, the tank has just run dry. I thought maybe instead I would use this as an opportunity to share something that I've been working on. as you know before I was a podcast where a bartender I used to write professionally for a living

and it's still like a passion that I've had. I love writing words on my tools and I'd like to use them to sculpt beautiful statues. So I've been working on something. It's not like a, it's not a book per se. It's sort of more sort of like a serialized digital, narrative. Sort of like an online novel, I guess. By that being serialized,

so released, released in stages, I've been going on it for a little while. I've done a couple of these. I don't know what homestuck is and I've never bothered to learn. I've just associated that keyword with a type of annoying online person. There's no way. The people I've seen mention it.

No. I thought I'd give you guys like a little writing sample from the most recent. chapter. Just because, like, you'll be able to catch up with the plot, I think, from context clues, but I think my prose is kind of coming into, yeah, it's really hard to speak in a complimentary way about yourself sometimes, right? Especially in Australia, it just doesn't feel good. But I think...

You leave that to us, Ben. Yes. Yeah. We will lift you up. Yeah, hopefully you guys... You spread your wings. We'll make sure you saw. Fully nude and idly playing with his fat green hog.

Ben Quatereros. the quartet of podcasters he had recently purchased with an erotic disinterest. Wabalanga, he purred, speaking in the formal hatties mode that indicates extreme horniness. I'm not laughing at your story, by the way. Okay, good, because I'm putting my fucking, my heart on the line here. It's just my joie de vivre coming out. Switching to Galactic Basic for the benefit of the podcast as he added,

which one of you cuts is going to suck me off first? an electric shiver ran through the nubile bodies of the four 30 or 40-something-year-old podcasters and they jumped startled as an electric shiver ran through the Nabuian body of Ben Quaterneros's plate of silver beer fridge when the compressor clicked on quote I'm just fucking with you he spat alienly from his enormous head or am I he asked coquettishly rolling over to reveal and suggestively pop out his tiny

ass, making it clear that he has exactly four assholes. Good to know. Speaking over his shoulder seductively, he told the podcasters to each go and select some of the cheap one-size-fits-all erotic body stockings he bought from Star Wars Timu.

We're having a party tonight, and you're going to meet the biggest names in pod racing. The podcast has gasped in sexual excitement. I hope Dodd Bolt will be there. They all set in unison under their breath. They blushed and giggled with a schoolgirl embarrassment

and flushed with the thrill at their shared desire to be sexually used and thrown away by the pod racer Dudd Bolt. That's it. That's what I... Okay. Do you guys... Now this... Now that's what I call podcasting.

Are you looking for a constructive criticism? This is what I call podracing. I have no idea. Now, this is what I call pod racing. Are I looking for notes? Are you looking for notes or just support? Maybe if we just point out the things we liked about it. Words are kind of like your cow tools, Ben.

You're a writer that I trust. Lucy, like I love your writing. I think you're very funny. Sold to Bonte Vista, one of my classics. Yeah, which I don't actually see a link between that work and this at all, but it is a random example of your work as well. I just felt similar to me. I did like that Ben Cordonaris was there.

Well, who wouldn't? He's a joy to see. I liked the use of the word coquettishly. I think that was quite evocative of what's going on. I like how there was continuity in the actions that, like, yes, he flipped over on his onto his stomach showing his tiny butt and four assholes. Then the next thing is that he looks over his shirt. shoulder coquettishly. We've carried the action through,

but make sure that the user can follow visually from the four assholes up to his shoulder, his head pointing backwards. I am kind of, this is something I do what I'm writing, but I'm thinking, how would this look in the movie when it gets made? You should, yeah, screenplay maybe. I also liked the use of the word Nubal to describe all the four of us because that's quite accurate. Yeah, beautiful Nubal bodies.

This is so weird because This is something we should talk about. Where did all the young noobiles go? Oh, no. We don't want to... I mean, I know physically they're still left. Dump it. But in our language, in the way that we form reality around us,

there's no longer any young newbiles. They're all step sisters, step sons. Are you talking about how barely any pornography seems to be described as barely legal anymore? Yeah, okay. So I can get ahead of this a little way. I'll tell you what. Political correctness. No, I do not endorse it.

Sounds a lot like endorsement, but go on. It's disgusting. I only go on those websites to shake my head at the stuff that's on there. Scrolling through. This is filth. This is ridiculous. Who talks like this?

They're related. I want people who are very legal. Unambiguously legal. Hey. Watching every video. And I'm going to cut that joke. From the podcast. Watching every video on Porn Hub and then blocking each URL.

How does this keep happening? I was literally thinking about this yesterday as a very bad stupid bit that I could do and then discarded it. You forced my hand. For three times recently, including this one, that you've been like it's really funny that you've said that. And then you've said the most insane stuff we should chat about on Earth. It has genuinely been something you've been thinking about. Can I add to Theo's insane stuff we should chat about Because something I want to chat about

What's with the AI slot porn And who's watching it? I don't think of ever I don't think I've seen that Oh every third one on Porn Hub If you were to look at it If you were a person who were to look at Porn Hub Too busy shaking my head to focus on the screen

It's like AI one It's like Yeah I know the category is there I have seen ads that are in the middle of the grid that look like they're meant to be. They're like video ones. That's fucked up. This has got to be the logical endpoint of like

Simpsons and family guy porn and stuff, right? Like nobody's watching that, right? I thought you were going to say it's a logical endpoint of human society. Well, that, yeah. Why is it always margin butt? It's always margin butt. It's always mad. Brian and Lois.

Don't be gross. He's a dog for Christ's sake. I don't care if he can talk and smoke. He's an adult dog though and he's been to university. Why not Marge and Lionel Hutz? Yeah, let's keep it adult. Yes. I don't think Lionel Hutz is fucking well at all.

I think he's fucking in with a stroke of a very insecure and non-confident man. I think everything's going wrong in his life. We know he's got a drinking problem. Oh yeah. Yeah. I don't think he's putting up a good performance. That's all I'm going to say. Who is then?

Maybe Lenny? Who? Maybe the same. Yeah, maybe the same. I think, I think Lenny has the relaxed. Is that something we could chat about? Lenny has the relaxed nonchalance of a guy who maybe throws some good dick. Yeah.

We know that as, and Carl, and Carl. Why is that obvious? Why is that obvious? Yeah, Lizzie. Because they're friends. They were trade tips. He's just because he's got aura. Yeah.

He's got Riz. This is already going off the rails. I think it's, I think it's because we. started with the Ben Quotonaris's hog and four assholes. What? Why are you blaming me? Ben, can I give you some feedback? Starting the morning that way. I would love to have some feedback from you, Andrew.

My feedback is simply that I I'm just way too aroused now to make direct eye contact with you. Too horny to podcast. Yeah. I can't look right at you and I think that's kind of, isn't that the greatest compliment one can give? Yes, thank you. About some art, you know? It made me too horny to go to work.

They're too horny to drive my car. The pornographer's dream. Just to know that like thousands of little goblins out there rubbing their little nubs. Yeah. Until the stuff comes out. Just with the power of words. Stuff comes out of it? It doesn't have to.

Stuff meant to come out of it. First I'm hearing. Stuff that stings, is am I right? Because they just have sex. for ages they don't come. You remember how Sting was it to tantric sex in the 80s? Okay, thanks for explaining. That helps.

I think that's the best genre of joke. Yeah, Sting does tantric sex. Hey, we've mentioned Sting doing tantric sex before because sometimes we talk about stuff we've spoken about before. And we're going to do it again in, oh shit, it's an update to an old news story. Oh, shit, it's an update to an old news story. Actually, before we do that, can I give you guys some stuff from the cutting room floor of that story that didn't make it in?

It was the four of us all getting jacked off by Gascaro at the same time because he has four arms. Okay. Oh. Yeah, so he's doing it to all of us at the same time. Also, I was picturing someone using that. You know the pit droids for episode one? They're the little droids with the one eye on the front that are fixing all the pod races and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

These guys are quickly repairing, like, rabbit dildos. I was picturing someone using one as like a, like a Hitachi style. Oh, okay. Yeah, and that could be any one of us. And they're sort of getting like, yeah. And they're sort of getting like sprayed as well. There was going to be a footnote at the end that was, and Lucy was off sick that day, just to sort of preserve the friendship.

Ben, I was, um, because of our recent conversation about Star Wars and how fucking horny it makes all of us. that was in an episode but got cut out about special editions and stuff like that I watched the despecialized return of the Jedi last night and I was like oh my god put these busted ass old songs back in please

God it was so good it really sent me flying straight back to watching it recorded from TV on a VCR My old house. Oh my God. You got to watch it despecialized. You got to despercialize that thing. When you're ordering up a Star Wars, say,

uh, don't despecialize that for me. And I'll have mine despecialized. Yeah. This is for something from the most recent episode, the bonus episode, Hypercolor Fat Dick on your mug. This is in regards to the actor Corbyn Berson,

who I'm sure you remember. So he was in that, the story of the story of the, the one red paperclip guy. Yeah. Who did the trades with the paper clip. And Corbyn Benson traded a role in a movie that he was doing for a mechanized, motorized, kiss snow globe.

Mm-hmm. Yes. And I was just, you know, I was thinking, why? Why snow globes? What's so special about this snow globe? From the Winnipeg Free Press 2013, Corbyn Benson on love of snow globes. Oh, okay.

I have a problem, Corbyn-Burton. So this is a targeted swap. This is a... It wasn't a random swap. Yeah, this was a swap of desire. Yeah, I get this. This is a high-value swap. High-value snow globes are big to Corvin-Burton,

though they be but small physically, generally. Yes. Generally, to my understanding. If they were too big, it would be really hard to turn it upside down to shake them. Yes. Um, if you'd need some sort of mechanism to get it started. You'd need to put your, your big snow globe in your sex swing and then you can't use your sex swing when you want to use that, you know? Yeah. And sometimes just having like that one little logistical obstacle to doing your hobby is enough to stop you from doing it.

I know, right? Oh, ooh, why don't we get in? Oh. Uh, you know what? Let's not. Oh, my 80 kilo Alf snow globe is in the sex swing. Can we just lift it out? We've got to get some towels.

Yep, got to get some towels. You don't want that thing hit in the ground. I'll get the dolly out from the garage. It's not a globe dolly. Yeah. Snow globe dolly. Well, then I had to get like a special, because, you know, the bottom of a dolly is flat.

What good is that doing me for a big round ball? And she's right, like, up. I just remembered I've got squash lessons, actually. Well, yeah, but like, if it's in the sex swing, it's going to be up there. Oh, that's hip point. Anyway, do you think, would we all collectively have more, respect for the paperclip man if he had actually done like two years of research beforehand

and found a guy in his area who was fucking insane about like fish pens yeah Garfield phone and he knew that Corbin benson was a fucking psycho for snow globes and a kiss mega fan this might have been all part of the plan maybe this is a way to celebrities just find out if one's got a weird obsession and then find a rare item for them and then you can call up Alexander Scarsguard and be like, Alex, rare item. Rear item. For you. I have that misprint postage stamp where the ducks are upside down that you want so very badly.

What will you exchange for it? Do I have anything that could tantalize a philatelotilatist like yourself? Anything interest you, philatologically speaking? Like my pussy, for example. Yeah, okay.

In Hollywood, Corbettson is a man who has worn many hats. I guess an actor would because the costumes. Sometimes, yeah. He's got some significant hair loss too.

It's a really great way to describe a bald man. Describe a bald man. Got any hat-based rolls? He's got to a guy who's worn a lot of hats, if you know what I mean. Misunderstanding that. that metaphor for your entire life and thinking it means the guy's just bald.

You got a guy in your script named Hatman. I'm in. Hey, quick something to chat about. Real quick something to chat about. Just a little PSA for the barbers of Australia. When I'm getting a haircut, you can stop pointing to my hairline and saying, you know, you're getting some hair loss

around your hairline here. You don't need to say that during the haircut. Do they do that? It's fine. It's happened at least three times now. There's classic people from the Barbary Coast are very rude. I'm in my fucking 40s. It's fine.

How do they know? Maybe that was always your hairline. Yeah. I think loss requires a differential for comparison. As you get older, as a man, I think it's very normal for your hairline to just sort of move back up your head a little. Dude, your hair is so full and rich. Like, I'm not worried.

I've never thought about your hairline. And he whipsed and he like, so he starts off. By saying out loud, so I said, I'm kind of growing my hair out a little, you know? I want some more length on it. And he's like, well, the longer it gets,

the more heavy it is, and the more of your hair, it pulls out. Gravity, pulling out your hair. Is that how it works? And he says to me, this is long enough.

And I go, okay. And he, like, and he pulls back in the hair and he's like, yeah, you see around here?

Yeah. all this sort of thing. So that part, that's fine for a speaking volume barbershop conversation. And then he leans right down into my ear very intimately. And he says, you ever put any oil in your hair? And I say, no, not currently. And he says, yeah, we got chlorine in the water here. It can damage your hair.

Put some oil in your hair once a night. It doesn't have to be anything special. I use almond oil in my hair. Once a week, sleep with it in there. It's fine. And then he stood back up. And we were out of the extremely intimate zone we had found ourselves in for a moment. I was like, why does that part need to be whispered, but not the hair lost stuff?

Yeah. Dude, you work in like a hairdresser, you can talk about oil. His alchemy secrets. Almond oil. Almond oil. I'm going to bed. smelling like an amoresse. I don't know why he had to go like scheming vizier mode when he told me about that particular part.

My beach. Anyway, if any other barbers are listening to this who might cut my hair in the future, it's okay, you don't have to tell me about it. It's all right. I know, I can see myself in the mirror. Let it ride. Let it fucking ride, dude.

As an actor, he's been a soap opera priest, a grizzled retired cop, and a prima donna third baseman. And over the course of three decades of the industry, he's also been a director, a producer, a writer, and M-Dash, A snow globe collector? Huh?

What? You're allowed to collect things. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Actors are just like us. Yes, the 58-year-old, perhaps best known for his role as Arnie Becker in the 1980s TV show, L.A. Law has amassed one of the world's largest collections of snow globes. And though he lives in Los Angeles, he's not just a dabbler in the wintry domes.

What does that have? do with Los Angeles. You're doing some jammal-wocky shit to me. Don't be saying wintry domes to me. Oh, is grabled in the wintry domes? Get the fuck out of here. It's brilliant my ass. Why don't you eat some spearmint gum and then give me a little wintry dome?

Yeah. Smoke a menthol cigarette. I have to do this. Oh, I got that wintry dome last night. He is a writer and director, and I think he made a Ponte pool knockoff. Oh. Now, you know we love Ponte pool. around here.

Yeah, big time. Pony Pall hits. Dead Air is a 2009 American Science Fiction Horror film directed by Corbyn Benson. The story focuses

on a radio station that warns its listeners after an explosion unleashes zombies in Los Angeles. So they're in the studio while all this chaos is unfolding and everything. And you're stuck in this one location

at the radio station, 2009, Pontepool, 2008. take from that what you will make pontipal again it doesn't it sounds like a worse a worse but not welsh potty potty what pontie pool is pontypool Welsh no it's very American isn't it Canadian I thought pottypool was Canadian it's probably Canadian right it's so Canadian are you thinking are you thinking of the word just sounds Welsh I mean it is a Welsh place name isn't it it is a Welsh place name there's also one of in Tasmania, we drove past a sign for Pontypool while we're down there.

There is. And also, really fun word to say. Ponte pool. Ponte pool. It is Canadian. Some of the best snow globes are Hawaiian, says Bernson in an interview. A lot of people might not know this, but so it starts every conversation. It must be so good to have like a, well, contrary to what you might think about snow globes

in Hawaii. I would honestly love to see this guy's snow globe collection. Oh, there are photos in this. article, if you want to find it on your own. The best ones are where you get snow and a palm tree. I love that sort of image of a warm place or flamingos or something. I don't like glitter for the most part. And I don't mind ones that have a sort of oil in them, the old advertising domes. I don't really like many of the new ones. The art is gone. The old ones were hand painted at the base was ceramic or bake light. I know this is how I sound talking about anything

that I like. Have you ever been assessed for anything by a psychologist? Typical people collect stuff too and like the old stuff better. And do they have really specifically? Oh, I don't like glitter. I don't want any glitter ones. This new mass-produced crap. I feel like not liking glitter is the normal. Yes.

Yeah, it should be the default. Getting extremely upset when somebody puts glitter on you without your consent. That's normal to me. Yeah, absolutely. Some people have allergies. Yep. Some people are allergic to getting a messy, sticky substance on them. Ben, I bet Corbin-Burton

is just like you and me. I bet he's going down to like the markets and he's saying all the fucking snow globes just have a digitally printed AI generated image on the back of them. There isn't even anything in the globe now. The ones that are just a picture. Fuck off. Dog shit.

The unusual collection began while he was shooting LA law, visiting cities and being gifted the chotchkes as he went. By the end of the show's eight-year run, he says he had collected about 25 or 30 before finding an antique snow globe priced at $240. Quote, I went, whoa, I think these are the same things I collect, he said. Snow globes?

What? Snow globes? You looked at a snow globe and went, wait a fucking second. These are just like my snow globes. What the fuck are you talking about? I think, is he maybe saying that he had accidentally been buying antique snow globes, that he didn't know the, value of and was surprised

when he saw one at an antique shop and was like this $240 thing that's I got these at home or he's just surprised to see a snow globe out of context from there he went to work researching the old-fashioned way by asking around and reading physical newsletters like snowbiz

snowbiz excuse me have got a newsletter for snow globes are you fucking kidding me that is the best shit I've ever heard in life. Can't find it online. It's no business like globe

business, I tell you. He slowly fell in love. The collection now sits at around 8,000 pieces. Holy shit. It's pretty fucking good. Where are you storing him? Well, he's got a room.

Please. So if he bought one every day for 21 years, that would get him to 8,000. Maybe you're buying someone's collection. He's got to be absorbing like deceased estates,

quarter houses, things of the nature. Just instructing your assistant to buy everything from this deceased estate and then check it all for snow globes. Well, if you've got

Corbyn's money. Yeah. Quote, if you did a small role in Kiss Kiss, Kiss, bang, bang in 2006, you could probably afford all the snow globes you wanted.

Might a picture. Quote, there's something general about it. There's something serene about it, and I think that's part of the appeal to me. Something pristine in a world that's kind of gone mad. Just the world's within it. Protected by the glass, he said. Dude, he said this in fucking 2013.

How crazy about Snow Globes now, do you reckon he is? Oh, the world's crazy in 2013. We'll fucking strap in, motherfucker. Yeah. Because it's about to get crazier. All through 2020, you had nothing to do but just scour. eBay. Oh, fuck.

I bet he's got so many now. God, can we maybe email him? I'll put that on a list. I want to see if we can get a number. We think you're great, by the way. If I've contacted you and you've come back and you've listened to this episode to get context for why I'm asking, we think you're amazing. Sorry, when we were mean to you, it was in jest.

It's kind of like a thing that we do on the podcast. Yeah, we're sort of like mean girls, but with a heart of gold. I'm sorry about last week when I said, Corbyn-Bernson, but I was picturing Tom Berringer in my mind. It could have happened to anyone. Didn't make the edit anyway, so. I'd like to apologize for just now when we said that about you. Quote, one-off, they're kind of goofy, but altogether they start looking like pop art.

It is quite impressive to see the room. Like, you know how in a Super Mario when you're in the castle and all the paintings are all the different worlds? Oh, in Mario. In Mario. In Mario. In the castle. In the castle. Before you ask, we don't say that.

We don't say Mario. The thing that you keep asking if we say it like that from the bonus episode. We do. We do. We do. We do. We do. We could.

Maybe. We might. In some parts the country, we definitely do. Use your best judgment. Yeah. Use context clues. It's me, Mario. And let my mama become a computer.

Yes. Yes. I think the snow globes are like that. If they're all in one room, 8,000 snow globes and each snow globe are world. I think a snow globe is beautiful. I'm a big, I'm a snow globe fan. I like a snow globe. And you could do the snow globe challenge, which is you try and shake them all up so the snow is falling in all of them at the same time.

You've got to run around and shake them all really fast. That's what he's doing, right? He's running around and shaking them all up. But by the time he gets back to the start, it's just stopped. He's got to shake him again. You can do it all day. You could do that all day long. What's that movie where the guy gets domed with a snow globe?

It's one of the 90s thrillers, the sexual, erotic, erotic thrillers. A couple of those lately. Body double, body heat. What movies. I'll get back to you. Snow globe dome, but that's what he dreams of. He's like holding a snow globe while it's happening. Long kiss good night.

Now there's a great picture. That's a movie. Oh, I love films. Unfateful. Richard Gere and Diane Lane, that's it. Never seen that one. Richard Gere domes a guy with a snow globe. Richard Gere domes a guy?

Yeah, spoiler. Richard Gere's given that wintery dome? Benson's lot is one of the myriad collections that were appraised and admired on extreme collectors set to premiere next week on Slice. The show looks at unusual and curated collections of prized objects ranging from antique toys to Wonder Woman paraphernalia. I don't think I would like to be featured on something.

something called extreme collectors. I feel like that's really a polite way of saying hoarder. It's a polite way of saying hoarder. Yeah. This is definitely one of those like midday time fillers on the Discovery Channel. Yeah, gork at the freaks. Extreme machines and they just go down to a quarry. That's a big truck.

This truck is huge. Host Andrew Ziegers examines them and gives them a price with the numbers going as high as $15 million. dollars. Burnson says that collections like the ones showcased on the series are particularly remarkable and necessary in this digital fast-paced age. You got no fucking idea what's coming down the pipe, dude. You got no idea. You're so innocent, so nubile about the future.

So, so noble. Quote, we are losing touch with the very thing that is the essence of us, which is that basically we are a moral, decent people that need love and human contact. I think when you have collections like this, just for a moment, you get your breath back. You go, and you touch back to simplicity. And I tell you, as human beings, we yearn for simplicity right now.

Wow. Yeah. I'm right there with you. How did you know? Shit. I'm right there with you, but. Oh, come on. No.

But I feel like I'm not quite seeing the connection. I don't know if I'm connecting the snowclubs. Like philosophically, 100%. Hondo, 100. Philosophically, we are completely aligned. It's just that the object you have chosen, the totem of your human connection, I don't know if I'm clicking with it that hard.

I get it. Handmaid from a specific place. They're not going to make a mess. It's all in there. You shake it all up, and then after a while it becomes peaceful. Yeah. And they're not going to come back and be like, you know,

it's not going to be loud or unpredictable. They're not going to put an app in there. You're not going to have to subscribe to your snow globe. You're not going to make an app in a snow globe? They're not going to make the lowest tier ads supported. Why am I paying for it if there are ads in my snow globe? Why are there ads in my snow globe? Yeah.

Yeah. They put ads in my snow globe. I think he's got a great fucking point. And I think right now, I hope more than ever he's taking comfort in his snow globes because things have really gone off the fucking rails. I hope he's not bored of him. I hope he's happy. Hope he never has to sell them.

What if we email him and he's like, what? That old, those hunks are junk. I threw them in the trash. Those pieces of shit. They will fucking snow globes. I make AI art. Yeah. Check this out.

You'd hate to wake up one day and look at your four and a half thousand snow globes and say, what? Why did I buy all these? all these in my fucking house. Yeah, my beautiful stock. What's the fuck? Then trying to sell them up.

They're worthless. Oh no. I'm ruined. Put everything into these. I'm fucked. It turned out they were just worth what I was willing to pay on the day. Oh. Stokelamps no intrinsic value?

No. Value was mostly emotional and sentimental to me. Fuck. He used all my money from Major League and Major League 2 on this. I hope he never got Snow Globe regret. No. I hope he's like now it's like 50,000 snow globes. Like he has a different house for his snow globes.

Like he has to drive down the road because he couldn't get an adjoining lot to go and look at his snow globes. I feel so confident that I'm never going to turn around and look at like my record collection and say. what the fuck am I doing? Yeah. The fuck am I doing here? I hope so. I have a fear that I will get that regret. I sometimes look at my tapes and I'm like,

spend a bit of money on some of those tapes. But I'm looking at them right now and boy do they look great. Yep. Love them. It's all good. Beautiful physical entity capturing something that you loved at some point in time. I don't think that's ever done. I got rid of all my DVDs when I moved to America and it's like a huge regret for me.

Really? Yeah. I will never get that back. That beautifully curated collection, the Michelle Gondry DVD. Oh my God. No. I think I gave away like 200, 250 prog rock and prog metal CDs. That was stupid.

You're stupid. You're an idiot. You're so stupid. I know. Well, one of my old friends from Uni days is like, hey man, like, how you've been doing? By the way, have you still got your like prog CDs? I'd love to buy them from you. You got praise.

My friend. How much? Fucked. How much you sell them for? Nothing. I just, I was like, I couldn't do anything. No one wants CDs anymore, dude. They're nothing.

Man, the CD section's getting bigger at record stores. Yeah. Little zoomers flipping through, tiny little fingers, time little CDs. Nubar little fingers. Don't. Zoomers collecting CDs. Maybe that's something we should chat about.

We're not going to. We're going to talk about something. else in stuff we should chat about. Here comes some stuff we should chat about. Stuff we should chat about. I think it's all stuff to chat about. Stuff we should chat about. Yeah, come some all stuff to chat about.

We're chatting about snow. Yeah, baby. I think it's oops, all stuff we should chat about today. Well, there was all that snow globe stuff and the Star Wars stuff earlier, so I think we're fine. And hey, it's nice to. have a chat. I've got to go to the bar, yes? I don't have to find all these fucking stories.

God damn. Now, I don't know if you guys, you guys would maybe have seen this. Theo, you don't really travel in these circles, so maybe not, but the other two of you might have. There is a certain type of like a millennial aged-ish person

who maybe works in the arts or something. Maybe they work in like TV or something like that. I don't know if you guys. That's a television. That's right. I don't know if you guys have seen this. It used to be a staple of like Facebook posts when people still use Facebook. You guys aware of the like that there's a class of people out there that live seemingly entirely by random sublets of their apartment in other people that are subletting their apartments apartments? Everybody's subletting.

They're all the time in a way that makes me very stressed where they'll be like, hey, putting this at. out to the universe, need to sublet a place for three months in West Berlin from February to April. Yes. Also, I'm looking to sublet in a different place. Yeah, let me know if you want to be in Coburg for those couple of months or whatever. And they live like this and it works out for them. It's just a really specific grievance that you have when you're friends with all these people

that work in TV from Sydney. Yeah, yeah, basically. My friends are all in long-term monogamous relationships. Yeah, hell yeah, dude. They live together. Congratulations to all of our friends that won AACT Awards. Yeah. Yeah.

Multiple of them, apparently. Yeah. Pretty cool. Pretty cool. Getting an award. Sometimes they write about that in the paper. One format of newspaper is the tabloid. We read stories from tabloids in tabloids.

in tabloid Phenomenon. Fist-headed man destroys church. Emonoid phenomenon. Hey, speaking of tabloids, just seeing a headline to sing a headline from the Daily Mail, our favorite, the Daily Mail,

about how people keep getting tricked by AI-generated conjoined twin influences. Oh, I saw that. Is it like Valerie and someone? Selma and Valerie. Selma and Valerie is your guess yet? That's my guess.

I guess. I saw this. briefly yesterday. Valeria and Camilla. Oh, not even close. Well, it's okay because I don't think I have thrown them real. But it's just an article that says, millions have been fooled by beautiful AI generated conjoined twin influences. But the reality of the rare birth defect is anything but glamorous.

And then they just have a whole article about how it's not actually good for you to be a conjoined twin. Just like the Wikipedia for conjoined twin on their health problems could occur. There goes my plans. Man, this is so weird. We live, like, this is, people have made that up for views, and then the Daily Mail needs a hook to get their, like, page views. It's just shit all the way down to the toilet.

Every one's dog shit. I've been reading a lot of Camus lately. It's making me feel good. What do you got to say about all this? I don't know. I don't think he'd like it. I don't think he'd like it. What does Camus have to say about AI-generated only fans, girls,

with Down syndrome. What does he have to say about that? I think he'd hate it. I think he'd smoke a cigarette and write... Kuh would hate it. Kill himself about it. Finding out something very surprising about Kamoo today. Camus has not yet...

He hasn't come out against it, though. True. So his science, I think... His silence says a lot, I'd say. It'd be really funny to go back in time to ask him for his opinion on something and he immediately just cuts his wrists. Yeah. He just kills himself.

Um-a-more. Get the poison pill out of his mouth first. Got to ask him about Instagram. Get him. Catch him. Slibering fuck, I'm getting away. Stop, don't have a little.

She'll be alone. He's trying to show him John Paul. Don't just stand there. That's Camus. That's Camus. Albert. Albert. Stop him.

Get him. Don't shoot him in the back. Just get him in the legs. Just want him to stop running. Hold him still. Hold his eyelids open while I show him this right wing TikTok griff rapper. He's got face tattoos.

Look at him. Running through the French woods after Camus with one of those like bowler launches. Rats around legs. I need you to see footage of people getting into different kinds of beds made out of different kind of vegetables. I hate those ones. They make me sick to my fucking stomach.

Oh, Elda loves those ones. Have you guys seen these? There's so many. It's like AI videos and it's this lady getting into bed but the bed's made of like, it's made out of different substances. Different substances. It'll just be like. Bed made of turnip?

It'll be like citrus and then there's a blanket that's just sort of made up out of stitch together citrus slices and then someone walks over and they pull up the blanket which just like separates itself from the whole form of the bed. It just comes out and creates itself and they pulled over themselves and depending on the substance it will go. they'll be like getting into a jelly bed, getting into an ice cream bed. Elna also likes the ones that have like kind of fat babies made out of fruit and stuff. Do you remember when viral videos were one guy cutting a hole in the side of an eggplant,

putting something inside the eggplant and then patching and filling and painting over the hole, and then putting that eggplant inside a bigger object and doing the same and just repeating that several times? And it was real? Back when it was handcrafted stuff Make your own citrus bed Make your citrus bed Yes Yes make your own fat baby out of stuff

From the Manchester Evening News I was renovating my daughter's house And I could have exploded Already This is maybe just a slight linguistic difference between British English and Australian English I would say that something could have exploded near me maybe I would have been exploded by something else

but I personally couldn't explode I guess well I guess you guys we'll read the context of the story and you tell me whether or not this individual could have exploded I would expect to maybe have a gigantic industrial strength firework jammed up my ass and lit and then I would maybe explode. And you say,

yo, yo, yo, yeah, I feel like I would need to be exploding from the inside out for me to say I had exploded. Yeah,

you'd need to be like the guy at the end of the burn my tomorrow's burn my shadow, uncle music video. Okay. With a bomb wired to his heart explodes. Beautiful Eastern European actor. Goran Viznich,

is that his name? Guy from the opening sequence of scanners, his head definitely explodes. Yes. A man has shared his shock finding after a World War II hand grenade this afternoon. Sorry. A man has shed his shock after finding a World War II hand grenade this afternoon while doing renovation work.

The man from Denton in Thameside said his day was, quote, ruined. When he found the device and police had to shut off the road and evacuate neighboring houses. The man, who doesn't want to be made, Named suspicious. Very suspicious. For what reason? Okay. Was rewiring his daughter's house on Grenada Road?

Come on. You fucking kidding me? Beautiful synchronicity. Beautiful synchronicity. Is the world laughing at us or with us? Do we think? It's a fucking sign, dude. They're peppering clues everywhere to tell us that they're controlling all of this.

The simulation is broken. Yeah, dude. He was rewiring his daughter's house when he went into the loft and found the suspected hand grenade at around 12.30pm today, February the 6th, the MEN, it's the Manchester Even News, I think, understands it was a grenade. You can't call your newspaper Men? The Men. They're like one of like the evil organizations from the early James Bond novels or something.

The evil agents of men. It was a grenade, but there wasn't anything inside it. It was a hollow shell. It's such a great standalone sentence. It was a hollow shell. I'm picturing a big... Well, number one, I'm picturing Mario Kart. Mario.

Yes. Because as far as I know, there aren't any coopers inside those shells in Mario. You don't know. You pick them up from the item box in Mario Card. But they have to be popped off of a Cooper beforehand. Yeah. Yes. The shell comes from a Cooper. The Cooper is not...

The Cooper is not the shell. The shell is not the Cooper. Well, they're not like a hermit crab. They're not moving into a new shell. Oh, they don't want to come out of it. No. They can't get a new shell after that. No.

They must wander the earth. That's the horrible... That's the horrible... New Cooper. Nude, Nubal Cooper. Can I get a newball cooper? Barely legal Cooper. There's a...

This is a horrible truth about Mario. cut they have been factory farming Coopers to then horrifyingly scrape them out of their shells and this could be one of those stupid, gritty kind of SNL sketches Oh where they like go through the

realistic ramifications of you know something well fictitious event I have good news for you if you look in the chat there we're not the first to explore this idea that people at Nintendo also have thought about Nintendo yeah Nintendo

It's a Japanese company that makes all those Unshelled Cooper Oh he's got a shirt on He's wearing like a chesty bond's like white singlet Like Just because they didn't want him to be nude Because I guess nothing covering as well Nothing covering his dick or anus

No that is true And that's the only spot that's going to be visible When he's in the shell as well Like you I will say this he is visibly upset He looks He's hanging ring out the back of his shoes.

He's not happy. He is distraught. I mean, picture, if you will. Picture, you know, Ben, I don't know if maybe you need to make this picture to cover out if that's possible. But picture, if you will, that this was Theo. And instead, the Cooper Shell... It's very easy to do.

The Cooper Shell is his tracksuit pant, bottoms and jacket that I have ripped off him and I'm running down the street with, you know? He thought, just once he was like... you know what just kind of want to try not wearing any underpants today yeah he does look very mournful

shirt but no pants why don't just leave him full nude if I had to chase someone down the street in my white singlet and boots and fuck all else I would probably look forlorn in the way that this Cooper does he looks like this footage should be played

in slow motion with Eric Sardi's Gimnopady being played over the top of it this is the worst day of his life. He's like, oh, my shell! Well, because he's not getting it back, because some fucking Yahoo, some 42-year-old man, playing. Some Italian fuck.

Mario Kart 64 on his pristine original 64 is going to fire it off at someone, and he's never getting a shell back. Yeah. They don't even know how to drag it behind them. Even if it doesn't hit anyone and it's just going around on the track, good luck trying to catch it. Yeah. Good luck trying to catch a fired green shell without getting hurt by it.

Yeah, dude. Well, I believe we have now adequately explored the sentence. It was a hollow shell. After working a night shift, the man only planned to be renovating the house for a short time in the afternoon and then hoped to go home and get some rest. Instead, he was left waiting until around 3pm when the police left the scene to continue his work. I'm going home after that. Yeah.

I'm going home after the bomb squad comes through. That's me done for the day. I'm out of here. I'm jetting. I'm fucking not sticking around. What do you need me for? Do you just need to look at me to see how I'm feeling about this entire operation? I think this is so dramatic.

From this guy? Just kick it up. Just throw it across the street. Yeah. Just get it under the nearest car. Why would you assume that it's like ready to pop? Like it's from World War II. Probably.

Why would you have a grenade from? Yeah. I think just, If you see a grenade in your house, pick it up and then find the nearest house that has a, what's the England flag of St. George's Cross? Is that the one that it is? The white and red one? Yeah.

Whichever house is flying one of those, throw the grenade at it. If it's a nerd, no harm, no foul. If it's not a nerd, no harm, no hurt. No harm, no foul. Exactly. Easy salt. Boring. Nothing story.

Call me when your mum's, call me when something happens to your mom. That's all I'm saying. Something digital happens to your mom. And I'm not talking about her getting figured. Hey, if that happens, call me as well. You don't need to call me because I'll be there. Don't come to me and complain to me about me helping your mother get her groove back. Okay?

Yeah. Have you been noticing every Sunday afternoon when you eat her, meet her for coffee, that she seems a little lighter on her toes, you know? Seems a little happier about the world. Seems a little more relaxed. It's because I've been fingering her. Yeah. Okay?

She gets home from church. I pop around for a quick finger. Yeah. Everybody's happy. This is vulgar. This is vulgar. Oh, this is vulgar. Oh, you don't like this.

The man said, we're doing a rear wire and I went in the loft. I couldn't get in at first. Winnie the Poohs stuck in the hatch. So I had to make the old bigger because it was tiny. He did. He did. He did get Winnie the Poohed in there. He did. That's why I've not been up there at all.

I went up. moved the box, fought nothing of it, and threw it down in the back bedroom. And there it was, a grenade with a pin in it. Oh, that's good. Don't you hate it when you find something and a part's missing? And you're like, well, never going to find that part. Yep. Not even, not the express.

Could I grab a bobby pin and use that instead? It's never the same. It's not the same. It's falling out all the time. Everyone's screaming. I saw the pin on the side and I thought, Jesus, it's a grenade. You needed the pen to know? Oh yeah, it could have just been a weird egg.

A strange egg. Big green egg. And oof, straunch. At first I thought, is it real? And then obviously you think, what if it is? What do I do? I just thought I need to call the emergency services and take it from there. It ruined my day, really.

The English is such a fucking miserable, fucking people. That's your framing of this. I was having a bloody normal day and it was bloody ruined. Just shut up. Stop fucking complaining. It's probably the most exciting thing that's happened to you all year. Yeah. You probably had like a history of violent style sex with your wife because you're energized by it. You're both so fucking energized. Elder and I sent a confrontational message to another parent the other night. Oh, this is the one you were telling us about. Yeah. Yeah. And we were both so jazzed for hours afterwards that we couldn't sleep.

Hell yeah. This is brought to mind because because we're talking about a history of virus style. Not just getting too excited. Getting to jazz up. Sending a risky text. You got to put the phone away from you far.

You throw the phone away. You send out. As though it were a live grenade. The phone rings. Don't answer that. Don't answer it. I saw the pin was still in it. And when you watch enough television, you see a pin in it and you think,

Knive Grenade. Yep. From TV. Like from TV. Like from TV. Mainly TV. It's a grenade like from television. Like from Band of Brothers?

TV's Grenade. And introducing TV's grenade. Like from all them episodes of mash. I watch on repeat every day. Thankfully, the police and explosive ordinance disposal team confirmed there was no gun powder out in the grenade and took it away to be destroyed. Why does it need to be destroyed?

Chuck in the fucking bin. Bring it back. Hey, that's my grenade. Well, now that you know there's nothing in it and you've had it scan and everything, now it's prank time. Now you know that you can go down to your local corner store where the guy's kind of a dick to you sometimes

and you pull the pin out and go, bitch. Throw it over the counter and run. Just twirl it around in your hand while you're talking. Just spinning it around in your hand. Like a picture toy. Twirl it around on the pin and then when the pin falls out. Oh, fuck, not again.

Oh shit. Yeah, I got five seconds to get that back in. Start doing that thing where you reach for it and you sort of kick it with the end of you for. Oh, come on. Get back here. The man continued. They took it away because there was no gunpowder in it, but they're still going to destroy it. I asked, can I keep it?

They said no. No keepsakes, so that was that. But it sort of ruined everyone's day, not only mine. Sounds like it was mainly yours. It sounds like it's just yours. Who else? Don't let this ruin your day. I think you need to be practicing some CBT here, you know? No one can ruin that thought.

Your day. The grenade ruined my day. Exactly. Yeah. The grenade tried to ruin my day, but I'm not going to let it. I'm going to keep having a good day. I had a grenade and now it's gone. Grenade didn't explode me.

Yeah. I didn't explode. Another day I'm not being exploded by a grenade. Yeah. Wow. What if you had, this is a nice way to think of things. So imagine the grenade had exploded and you, you were in heaven. Yes.

And you were granted one wish, which was that you were allowed to have the rest of the day on earth after you exploded as if you hadn't exploded. and then you go back to heaven, right? Now, if that had happened, how would you spend that afternoon? Would you be whining about your day being ruined? Or would you go and fuck your wife? Stick a style. ...dress as a cheerleader from the high school that you both went to.

I was on my own. I had to go sit in my son's house around the corner while they were dealing with it. And then I came back and spoke to the bomb team. They wanted to know exactly where I found it so they could search the area. my daughter's been worried about the disruption she's caused in the area, the road being closed and all that. You say to fucking anyone, yeah, it's crazy. I was in the attic and we found a grenade.

Yeah, they'd be like, oh shit, okay. Oh, I get it. Oh, I guess it. All right. Was a grenade? On Grenada road? What is the irony. What a, one interesting story, they'll say,

boy, I'm glad I connected with one of my neighbors, and I love community. That's what I can say. What are you saying? What are you saying? Road roast! I don't care if there's a grenade. I'd rather be exploded than not at home.

I got 10 grenades in my egg. I see me whining about it. My team's steeping. You wouldn't believe what's happened to me, mum. You're wishing about a grenade. I need to get home and defrag my mom. I turn it to my computer the size of a gymnasium. I've only got the one spare room.

imagine if when your mum got turned into a computer she got turned into one that was generationally appropriate for her yeah yeah like early arp an

fucking things yeah you don't want a mum with like a who's a computer from the 60s or 70s that's gonna take up to communicate with punch cards

and magnetic tape drives keep failing my mom's got a CRT for an Ed I've had to learn Cobol just to ask her if she wants to have a tea

oh This is the most British possible sentence that this guy could wrap this up with. I thought I'd be sat on the settee now, relaxing. But no, it was exciting at the time, but now it's just a pain, really. Go and have a cup of tea and shut the fuck up. Relaxing on the settee is so funny. You guys have nothing to live for. So culturally important.

Cetee time. And like, we're picturing the same, like, big floral couch. I'm picturing my nan's city. Yeah, exactly. And there's plates on the wall. He's just sitting there, hands on his knees. He's doing nothing. What you won't do today?

Fancy a sit. Yeah. I'll perch on the set for a while. I'm sure you fucking will. How does the article not mention one time that it's Grenada Street and there was a grenade on there? Are you kidding me? They're made of stronger stuff than us. I doubt it.

Hey, this is definitely an episode of the podcast, Bonte Vista. I hope you're enjoying free me and free brewery. You will be getting another free episode next week as well. And I got to tell you, unless something goes dramatically wrong in the next couple of hours, the Theo Files is coming back. That's right. So look forward to that. Otherwise, you'll just hear a beep here.

Yeah. Yeah. Unless. Unless something bad happens in the next few hours. Let's just say you're by... We're turning it on. Read about us in the news. We will talk to you in a couple of days.

Stay safe out there. Bye. Bye. Bye. Goodbye.