Boonta Vista - EPISODE 447: Taking Serpent To See The Weeknd

Episode Date: May 31, 2026

Lucy, Andrew, and Ben bring you: Using your farm skills to tackle petty theft, lightbulb tech, the French tradition of direct action, bullying in the solo yachting community, a nude man emerging from the river, how to treat your anaconda right, the introduction of the Dripping Report, and Headline News. *** Outro: Ophis le Serpentaire - Vincent Gémignani *** Get tickets to the live show at boontavista.com/live *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Website: boontavista.com Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Let's do it online 11. Oh my God, we should do it on the room. It's a Friday night. Very cool. Hello and welcome to Winter Vista, episode 447. If this is your first episode, just a heads up that we start every episode with a sort of fictional vignette written by one of the hosts and then used as a sort of improvisational jumping off point for the other hosts, none of whom are trained improvisers or comedians.

In this intro, I'm in the world where I'm the only person who can do. talk normally and everyone else could only talk using the full names of movies from one actor's filmography. Isn't that fun? Jesus fucking Christ. With me, only allowed to speak in full titles from the filmography of Mike Myers is Lucy. Hi Lucy. Trek. What?

Oh my God. That's so crazy. What? Oh boy. But enough of that. Also with me, are they allowed to speak in full titles from the filmography of Jim Carrey? Sorry, I'm just getting ready for this. It's Andrew.

The mask. Yeah, I was thinking of the mask too, dude. That's so fucking funny. This worked so well. That's awesome. Oh, my God. Mr. Popper's Penguins. That means kill me.

What was the deal with Mr. Popper's Penguins? It's about a guy who has some penguins. Mr. Pover. That man returns. We're out of the intro now. You're allowed to, I need you to tell me what Mr. Puppers Pugwoods was about. Was there like a remake of some shit? I kept getting it confused.

It came out around the same time as the Incredible Life of Walter Middy, right? Which was the remake of the Incredible Life of Walter Middy. Secret life. Secret life of Walter. The Secret of Walter. I haven't seen it. Denver told me that's his favorite movie and that's absolutely insane. That's fucking bizarre.

I watched the original, the Danny K one a couple of weeks ago. pretty good actually. It is loosely based on the 1938 children's book, Mr. Papa Penguin. Mr. Papa Penguin. Mr. Papa Penguin. Mr. Papa Pegwood. This is some kind of a Mr. Papa. Mr. Papa's penguins? This fella got some kind of a penguin. What sort of arrangement does Mr. Papa have with these

penguins? Ooh, it had Carla Gugino in it. Oh, it's got Ophelia Lian. lovey bond is Mrs. Peppie Pepinopoulos? That's crazy. Fielia Loverbond. That sounds like a bond name. Afeelya Loverbond.

It's a birth name too. Incredible stuff. Austin Powers. Yeah. Mr. Puppert Pemann. Mr. Puffer Pankman. Maybe we should go to improv school, actually. We should go. That would be good.

There's one in Brisbane. What if we became level four improvisers? Do you think there's like levels, like karate belts? No, there's definitely levels. I know for fact, those levels. Oh. You got to graduate. Yeah.

Because, like, if you're like a level one improv, that's, you know those Instagram ads? Level one improviser. This is Level four improvise. It's a picture of like a really shitty guy. A level four, he could like throw fireballs and stuff. Just looking at the production history of Mr. Popper's Penguins. Originally, of course. Ben Stiller was going to play Mr. Popper and Noah Baumbach was going to direct.

No. They then dropped out and we ended up with. Jim Carrey and Mark Waters, the director of He's All That and Bad Santa 2. Huge. Cool. Awesome. He's all that. The guy who originally bought the 1938 children's book and Mr. Popper's Penguins to the film studio,

watching the final result with his head in his hands. This is not what I pictured when I bought someone else's idea to you. Thinking that you were going to get Noah Baalberg directing your adaptation that you brought to the studio and then finding out instead you got a guy whose name I've already forgotten because I'd never heard of him in my entire life. I don't feel like a crime. It's time for Crime Watch. How about this for an improv character? Jim Carrot. And what would he sound like? What's his maybe he's got like bunny teeth or ears or like he looks like a carrot. Just paint him orange. We need to go to school. We need to get to school. We got to go to improv school so fucking bad.

It's coming to us from W-D-A-F in Lawrence, Kansas. What da-fuck? No, that's good. Now, that's good. Went to school for six years to learn how to do that. Lawrence woman uses farm skills to take down car burglar. Okay. Car burglar.

Is that a weird phrase? Well, yes. I think they are actually making an important distinction here because the person didn't steal a car. they were burglaring burglaring the contents taking items out of the car yes

gotcha gotcha that's the difference between the car thief and the car burglar and a car jacker is stealing the car while you're in it

yes but not they remove you as part of the process yes a car thief takes an empty car a car

jacker takes a kind of burglars the car of its driver yes but then the carjacker

doesn't want it The car thief doesn't take it And the car burglar leaves it Oh Riddles Well those classic riddles Where you start with the answer first Yeah it's like jeopardy

A Lawrence woman tackled a 28 year old man Who says she broke into her Who she says broke into her car And stole some cash The woman asked to remain anonymous Due to safety concerns She sounds pretty safe

She tells Fox 4 she grew up on a farm. She used her experience in tackling 500 pound calves to take down the burglar. Tackling this guy like a calf? If you can tackle a 500 pound calf, you can tackle a 150 pound man. I guess so. Stands to reason. It's logical.

Quote, I'm running after him barefoot. Just going at him full force, as hard as I can go, she said. Wow, were you like running through the mud? Do we feed all dirty? Squishing around? Had it rained the last night? Squishing around him? We don't need a sexualist from his feet.

No, they do it themselves. Oh, no, that's worse. The woman spotted a stranger rummaging through her car early Sunday morning when she ran to confront him. He bolted, but it doesn't end there. Quote, there was no thought about it. It was a guy in my car. He's not supposed to be there. He's going to pay for that.

He's going to pay for that. Liam Mason's taken, but about the like $4.87 that you have. How much cash you keep in your car? Babe. What's in there? How much money you got in the ashtray of your 1987 Honda Civic? I don't know. I don't say that.

That felt weird. You don't say that. I don't say that. Babe. Babe. How much cash are we keeping in our car, babe? Literally just take it in with you. Take it inside, babe.

I was trying something new. It didn't work. Didn't feel good. You're not for the guys. You're not for the girls. You're also not for the gays. I'm strictly for the gays. I'm strictly for the heterom.

The woman chased and tackled the man. Quote, he sees me, stumbles completely, and as he's stumbling, I go for a full body tackle, she added. The next thing I remember is I have him

locked between my legs. I love stumbles completely. Stumbles completely. I wouldn't think to go for a tackle, but like it makes sense. What's your move? Make yourself look as big as possible? You would think to,

you're like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I'm huge. I'm very big, hey. You're not meant to be doing that. Like you're going to hit somebody, but maybe a tackle's the best move in this case. But a tackle leaves you with the person. A hit, you might be able to get some distance between you and them.

That's true. You're kind of interlocked. Yes. Yes. Isn't there a giving and a taking with the tackle? You are attaching yourself to them while you're also attaching them to you. It's a bilateral process. It is bilateral. It's bilateral.

It's bilateral. And then she's Zina Onotopped him? No fucking idea. What are you talking about? You've never seen... Oh, from James Bond. The James Bond movie Golden Eye in which Thamke Jansen plays Zinia On A Top.

I thought you were talking about... She kills dudes with her thighs. She entwines them in her thighs. She crunches them. On the top. And she erotically strangles them as well. And it did something to a whole generation of guys. Yeah.

Yeah. And probably some gals. She held a bit of leg lock until he surrendered, holding his phone as collateral while they gathered her belongings, now scattered across the ground. So she's taking his phone and been like, get my shit. Get my shit.

Get my shit. It's very funny to think of someone who has been released and they can run away, but they're like, oh, such a fucking pain in the ass, man. It's got my cards hooked up to it. I haven't put any of my photos in the cloud, so they'll be gone. I don't even carry my wallet around anymore. Just tap everything.

Just tap everything. Miss, I need that to tap. I can only tap. I don't have a new physical card. I was trying to take some of your money so I could deposit it at the bank, so I'd have something to tap. And without that, this whole exercise, pointless and fruitless. She said he stole $49 and a flashlight.

What kind of fly? flashlight does it say? Is it one of those ones where you see people like using them in the woods at night and they turn them on and like that hemisphere of the globe lights up and all the owls fall out of the trees? Yeah. Planes crash, you know? How many lumens are we talking here? Or is this like a $3 impulse by keychain one double A battery sort of shitty little LED thing? Actually, can I talk about fucking something? Something to chat about? Yeah, let's talk about something real. Let's get real. For a fucking second.

Just fuck this shit off and just talk about real, raw shit. Let's just have a conversation. I would love it if for once in our fucking lives we could get real for a second. I want to get down with the fucking nitty gritty. The brass tacks? I want to get down to nuts and bolts. Brass tacks, all of it. Brass tacks, your nuts and bolts.

And a little bit of nitty gritty put them all in a bucket. We're getting in there. We're rummaging around. Tastes really bad. My teeth are broken. So you know how like a lot of stuff has changed in our lifetime, but mostly not as much as you'd think. Like, yeah, we're doing some stuff in space, but not a lot. We kind of have flying cars, but not really.

We kind of have jet packs, but not really. The internet is just like the internet, but more. Kind of robots, not really. If you showed someone from like 100 years ago regular Google search and AI search, they kind of wouldn't really be able to tell the difference. so just be like it's words on a computer or whatever. It's a bit of a change, but it's not that much of a change. You know what?

It has fucking changed dramatically in our lifetime, so I don't think anyone is talking about. Lightbulb technology has gone crazy. I feel like it happened really suddenly too. Like this, we went from needing to get, you remember the dolphin torches you would buy that were the size of a car battery? Those giant fucking torches. They had like a handle. With a handle on them. Yeah.

Because your arm would be getting pulled down. They're fucking heavy. You could be expected to just hold it maglite style. The big torch. You can't even buy the big torch anymore. I mean, you probably can. You probably can. But like they don't sell them at like camping shops or bunnings anymore because like you can get a way smaller torch that's way more powerful.

At last for way longer, we don't need the fucking big torch anymore. Even though it's satisfying to hold because it's a big torch. We just have to change a light bulb all the time. Like all the fucking time. Light bulbs just blue. Light bulbs don't blow anymore. Like what's with light? I mean,

I guess they do, but rarely. I mean, I haven't changed a light bulb from it going out unless, like, the only ones I've had to do is because we had a thunderstorm and, like, the shit in our house gets fried if we get lightning strikes nearby. Yeah, I just changed mine because they were the wrong, the wrong tone of white. So. Ah, it's cold in here because the light's cool. Don't like it. Don't care for it. It's nuts to me.

This is like such a dramatic change. I get like nostalgia thinking about the big torches. There's some specific big torches in my mind. I'm like, see, I do know that they, they still sell like a full-sized

mag light. Oh, okay. Flashlights, right? Which, you know, you're filling up

with fucking eight desal batteries or whatever. $300 Australian, but it's a, it is an LED flashlight, right? So all those batteries are going to keep

that light going for about 6,000 years. Yeah. Yeah. But my understanding is also that the point of that type of flashlight is that it can be used to bludgeon people. Yes.

So if you are a security guard. Good weapon. Great weapon. Yeah. If you're a security guard and they're not giving you like the retractable police baton, you can just give you one of them. And then if you need, you can kind of club somebody with it. But, uh, I'm thinking about that big torch now. I'm thinking about the tactile feel of the button, the little depressed button that you use. Click, click, click. It still exists. You could absolutely still buy the dolphin torch. it is still powered by a 6 volt battery.

It's just, it's LEDs now. So it's probably just way better in every way. But it's the same, roughly the same form factor. They have modernized it a little bit, which obviously, you know, I'm a man of the past. I don't agree with that. But you can go to super cheap auto and for 2499, buy yourself a full-sized dolphin torch. I have to retract basically the whole last five minutes of the podcast. Quote, so he helped me for about 20 to 30 minutes, find my staff that have been scattered

in the chase. The woman said she used colourful language, telling him to leave and calling the police. Colourful language. Fuck the fuck out of here, you little shrimp dick bitch. Fucking get out of my fucking car. You get into my car. Fuck you. I leg lock you.

This is great. She's got him in a leg lock being like, pick up my stuff. Pick up my stuff. 20 to 30 minutes? 20 to 30 minutes of chat. What did you talk about? So you do this often? You do a lot of cars.

First time. Burglar lot of cars. first time. How many did you do tonight? Was it just my car? Why did you pick my car? Go on. No, go on.

Tell me. Tell me. Why? Do you like it? Coming to the realization over the 30 minutes that it's probably kind of your fault for leaving the door unlocked. Man, I'm just, I know I'm in a position of privilege and, you know, an insufferable left-wing woke fool. Yeah, you are. Probably like, I don't know.

Guys, I'm not. He took four. $39 in a flashlight. I'm not going to be like, fuck you, dick, dick hole. Come get my shit.

I'll be like, I don't know, he probably maybe needed that. Probably needed it more than I did. I should probably just lock my car. I have $49 in your car. Yeah, that's weird.

That's weird. How many tolls are you planning on going through? You live on a farm. You live on a farm. Does she live on a farm? She was raised on a farm. Oh, she might have left the farming life behind,

but her instincts kicked in. Instincts, farm instincts. Never go away. This is a good, this is a fun. move. It's just a good time. I think they both had fun. They both probably laughed about this later.

They probably said, call me, I mean it. Next week, we're hanging out. D&Bs. You and me. I'm just, like, genuinely, let's hang. Yeah. D&Bs. Next Friday. This brought us together this $49. How about less calling the cops more pantsing? How about that?

Maybe just dack him. Maybe just dack him. Not in a way that constitutes like a form of sexual assault, just in like a fun way. Just like a fun dacking. Yeah. Yeah. It's single DAC only. Like, no, don't get anyone's dicks or pussies out just because they love to. Do you want to get DAC or do you want to go to

county jail for two months, Ben? I get so much reading done in County. Two months. Don't have to do anything. They don't have to fucking go to work. Don't have my computer. Finally read you Lissies, you know. Oh my God. Imagine I could read one of the books that smart people read for the first time in my life. I'd be changed. I come out. Send me to lockup. Sitting on the bench in the jail cell with this book open just a occasionally mouthing. What the fuck? What the fuck is that supposed to me?

Oh my God, they gave me the non-annotated version of Ulysses. I don't understand any of these fucking references. They gave me Ulysses, but I don't have my phone or a dictionary. I knew I should have brought a Jack Ritra book. The shit sucks. Lawrence Police shared body cam footage of the incident. Less than 30 minutes later, officers say they found the man at a nearby apartment complex just south of Clinton Parkway and Crossgate Drive.

He had even more property on him. What do you mean he had more property on him? Like he had objects about his person? He had her property or he had just acquired other property on the way over? I have property on my person. I got poop bags and a pair of headphones at all times. Or did he go and rob another car after this? That's pretty cool actually.

He didn't let it deter him. No, pivoted. He had a plan and he stuck to it. It's just like layer cake. If I was trying to steal $49 and a flashlight from a car and then I got tackled and my pants came down and all the coins fell out of my pocket like Sonic. And then I was coming out of his pockets. And then I was held in place for half an hour and everything. When I left, I think I would want to just break into another car successfully just to get my mojo back.

You have to immediately get back on the horse. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't want to let that linger. You know what that feeling to symbol. It's like gambling. Yeah, it's like gambling. It's exactly like gambling. You've got to double down. If you lose, you need to get double in the next one. The last thing you want is to find yourself in the situation where you have the yips about breaking into cars.

Yeah. You know? Yes. Just do it. Just go with it and feel it. Quote, our victim did a great job of giving a description of what the suspects was wearing. Lawrence Police Officer Molly May said, you fucking, you did the punishment to him. You did the punishment. You got your reparations from him by taking back the shit that he stole. It's done.

The interaction is completed. It's over. You've restored like the cosmic balance on your own. You know, in your worldview, I don't think the cosmic balance was, you know, necessary that this is the way to go. You've done the restorative justice. It's done. Yeah. And you've probably gave him a little pat on the bottom as he went away and you went,

ah, don't you do it again, which he did, obviously. but you know. Hit the showers. Go on and been like, oh, by the way, police, kill this guy. I want you to corner him in his apartment and because he's holding a phone, you're going to say he's got a gun and then you're going to shoot and kill him. That's what I want to happen to him next. The people want to know that someone else's life kind of got fucking ruined.

Like permanently destroyed, ideally. But they're left alive to live with it. May said this woman is fortunate. Police did not recommend taking matters into your own hands. Oh, and yet we're hearing about this in the news as though it's awesome. I don't. Quote, people burglarizing, breaking into cars tend to be armed. And a lot of time, the situation can go very sideways very quickly.

So we don't recommend trying to be a vigilante, trying to do this on your own. May added. The woman's grateful. She escaped with scrapes and cuts. Like, she didn't escape with scrapes and cuts because she initiated the interaction. She initiated the violence, yeah. The guy didn't like, yeah, fucking, quote, should have seen what he looked. looks like, the woman added.

Okay. Well, now you just engendering more sympathy for the other dude. She remains on high alert and understands the dangers of chasing a suspect. Quote, in hindsight, it's not a good idea to do it at all, she said. I got very likely he didn't have a gun or a weapon or anything and he was more than willing to cow it out. It was really fun. Jesus. You're really just bullying this guy now.

Police arrested man, the woman says she would tackle again just with more caution. What does that mean? More caution. You didn't learn shit at all. You didn't learn shit. We're going to get yourself in trouble. One paragraph apart from, in hindsight, that's not a good idea, to, oh, I'd do it. Oh, I'll do it again.

I'd do it again. I'd do it again. Because I fucking loved it. Yeah. It sounds like she loved it a little too much. You know, some people are just waiting, waiting for an excuse for an explosive burst of violence. Aren't we all? No.

Oh, if this woman does do it again, we might see her in the headlines. We talk about headlines in headline news. These are all taken from English tabloids. He walked into a pub with a hammer and hit a random stranger on their head with it. Bonk. Sorry, that's not funny, but... I mean, it's odd. Sometimes odd things are funny.

They don't say what kind of hammer, though, because it could be bullpen hammer in which case, ooh. Could be a big cartoon hammer in which case. could be one of those ones with the kind of the kids ones that have the sort of concertina concertina plastic you know now that's funny toot bong me with one of them all day sick man saw red mist when he ransacked and trashed landlady's cleck heaten flat who among us sick man saw red mist sick man saw red mist sick man saw red mist sick man saw red mist hmm 11 ways to keep your dogs cool during a heat wave including

one thing you should never do. Terrible Paul Simon B-side. Put him in the car to cool down. Don't put, why would you have a list of things you can do to cool down and then one you shouldn't? One you shouldn't do. I think you should never do converting your car

into a huge microwave and running it with the dog inside. Why wouldn't you have like 11 things you should do to cool your dog down? And then by the way, here's also a warning about something. Don't do 11 ones and include the one you shouldn't do. Maybe it's give him a beer.

Yeah. So it's still something. It's still good to do it. It's kind of awesome. It is really funny to list it as like a method but one that is not recommended. Yeah. Bizarre. Absolutely bizarre.

But I guess they are pretty strange over there in Europe. We talk about Europeans in Europe Watch. This is from English language French news service, the Connection. Drivers in France destroy quite abusive countryside speed camera. on hill. Abusive? Abusive. I was yelling out like, hey, you frog fuck, slide down. It's just you frog fuck. You cheesy, he didn't cut. A speed camera in France has been destroyed by irate drivers after being termed abusive due to the location on a long descent. A lot. This is, I'm kind of sad Theo's not here. Yeah, he would have, he would have loved talking about

speed limits. Go to the speed limit on a, yeah, okay. Online commenters on the Cam Route Facebook group claim the drivers on the 80 kilometer per hour road would speed more easily and accidentally on the route because of its downward slope. If only there was some way to control the speed of the car. To know kind of how fast you were going. We should probably put that in cars, I think.

Everybody knows the best part about driving is when you do reach the top of a hill and you start the decline. I'm just kind of putting the car into neutral, crossing your arms and closing your eyes and letting the car do the work. Seeing what happens. The location of the camera is therefore deliberately placed to catch people out, the user said. Authorities arrived at the scene of the camera this week, finding that it had been severely damaged and rendered inoperable, most likely by burning. An inquiry into damage has been opened. What do you mean most likely? You can't tell.

Could be anything. Acid. Could be using an acidic attack. Black smoking speed camera could have been anything. It's bad to speed but I've got to hand it to the French on the way that they'll just like destroy shit that they don't like. Man, what is it about? Like, how come, do you think it's because we like adopted, I guess we're sort of modelled on like the post-French revolution democracies, right?

Yeah. But they earned theirs through fire and blood. Through the French Revolution and they've just kind of stuck with that vibe. And I think that's really beautiful. the monarchs around and then we sort of like but we're doing democracy and stuff but we didn't do it through like if we'd earned it

through violent force would we still have an innate sense like a learned generational sense that like if shit's gone bad you could start burning some shit if your boss wants you to work an extra hour you could just like burn cars on the street literally flip a Fiat 500

and set it on fire like two dudes could probably flip one of those I'm sure dudes could probably do that. I think we could do it. Yeah. I just think we need that. We need a little like reminder that this gets results because they seem to have it unlocked.

Like they're like, we're putting up the pension age by one year. Then all weekend it's like barricades and burning cars. Yeah. Yeah. It's beautiful. It is beautiful. You shouldn't speed. That's one of my beliefs as well.

Oh, you absolutely shouldn't speed. But this is a funny thing to do. Like everyone in Australia would be far too cowardly to get out there and just be like, oh, I'll just fuck one of these up. You just fuck it up. Why not? This camera is not the only one suffering from vandalism. The problem is growing nationwide.

One speed camera in southwest France has been vandalized at least five times since 2024, with the most recent happening just 10 days after receiving its last repair. And now you're putting it in the news. It's going to happen again. Yeah. People are like, oh, that's funny. Oh, I didn't realize I could do that. Yeah, I do like, I do enjoy, like, public design and the,

in the form of, you know, desire paths, like, where people just keep showing you that this is the way a thing should work. Like, not having a speed camera there. Yeah, we don't want a speed camera here, actually. So we will just sort of keep wiping it out. That's fine. Similarly, a camera installed on a road near Litsio in Morbihan in Brittany in 2020 has been burnt and destroyed three times.

While over Christmas, 2025, many devices were seen with, quote, festive decorations on them in a bid to obscure the cameras and stop them from working. That's just delightful. That's just good, clean fun. Non-destructive, good, clean, Christmasy fun. That's some just newtide fucking mirth that also happens to let you speed. We could do that. Don't speed, though.

Don't speed, don't speed. Don't speed. Traffic engineers, road engineers, they tend to know what they're doing. Hey, I bet Facebook groups fucking loved posting about this shit when the people in there did it. Oh, that's a confusing sentence. We talk about shit that happens in Facebook groups and Facebook Drama Watch. As I've talked about before,

I've completely ruined my Facebook algorithm by using Facebook. Now I only see... That's not what they want you to do. They've actually, they've been engaged in a very conscious activity for a while now that is designed to get us all to stop using Facebook.

So you're really working against them there. I'm a very tenacious person. I see a lot of, internal dramas in small communities being played out in Facebook groups. This one is taken from the Tin Can Bay Notice Board Facebook group. To the men who have been bullying me these past weeks, it may be you one day who needs somewhere to rest. Why are you so nasty?

My tinny is not in anyone's way. A friend is watching it for me on his jetty. I'm not hurting anyone. I'm a solo woman with a 44-foot yacht, grateful for everything in my life. in a world where greed and manipulation reign, I know what I choose, kindness. I forgive, but I don't forget the lesson. I love deeply, but not at the cost of myself respect.

I listen with empathy, but I still stand up for myself. Being kind does not mean accepting disrespect, manipulation or toxic behavior. Peace is not weakness. Boundaries are not cruelty. Real growth begins when you stop explaining yourself to everyone and start protecting your peace instead. Be calm. be respectful, but never shrink yourself just to make others comfortable. True power is having a kind heart without allowing the world to harden or misuse it.

I'll never accept bullying behavior and I question those who support bullies. Yes, babe. Yes, babe. You tell him. I don't know what you're talking about. Your tini? This is about your yacht. She's not allowed to keep her titty there.

Yeah. I read through all of this. It turns out the drama is quite evolved. she's keeping a boat at a place where you're not supposed to be keeping your boat and some people had been politely telling her over the course of a week how you can't keep your boat that checks out yeah she did post an update here

according to the company director of the jetty I am permitted to have my tender attached to my friend's cruiser but I'm not permitted to attach my tender to the jetty due to maritime laws does this have to do with your empathy or your heart protect your peace babe protect your peace Problem solved. They're trying to wrong the whole time?

No, I don't think so. No, they're trying to dull her sparkle. She does have more to say here, though. It's not over. Thanks, folks, for your support. Just a thought, perhaps the laws need to be stated in signage on the jetty, so it's clear and precise for everyone.

Also, a no bullying sign should be applied. Yes. The bullying started in the car park because I parked my car in a spot that I, quote, wasn't allowed to. There was plenty of space free for other cars to share the ramp entry, it was unnecessary and unkind to speak to me like that. I love this kind of person that just thinks that being politely told something is being bullied.

Yeah. Disagreement. Because you parked your car in a wrong spot. Conflict is not abuse. Conflict is not abuse, babe. Just be kind. You never know what other people may be going through and help others when you can. So you parked your car in like a no stopping zone and you tied up your titty to a wolf that's not allowed to have private boats on it.

And you're like, be kind. Be kind. That's what I'm trying to say. You never know what someone else is going through. Choose kindness. Choose your piece. I love stating all of your values over the course of five paragraphs because you've just like, you've parked badly.

Yeah, because you parked badly. I just know that this woman is such a cunt, right? Oh, demon. She's an evil person. There's like a sort of person that we all know what have all seen where they're able to rationalize their own like incredibly self-involved worldview as a really elaborate but meaningful system of like philosophical beliefs philosophical stuff protecting your peace etc yeah yeah real like using uh therapy language to just sort of justify an excuse just because we're all the

protagonists of our own universe and like we're also self-involved in our own ways but a lot of people have managed to get rid of the part of their brain that would make them reconsider their actions by adopting. Oh God, it must feel so good. You just think you're right all the time. Yeah. I really like using, you never know what someone's going through to mean the thing I'm going through is somewhat disagreeing with me.

Yeah. So that's kind of it. Literally just because you like, you just parked your car and your boat in places where you're not allowed to park either of those things. And you're like, you know what? No bullying signs. Why don't we put those up everywhere? Can you imagine you go into a jetty and there's a bunch of no bullying signs?

Like what happened here? What happened here? Let's just say 144 foot yacht owner had a bit of an altercation. Also going to bully someone and then seeing a no bullying sign and being like, oh, I was sorry, I didn't realize. I didn't realize this was a no bullying zone. Is that just on weekdays or is it the whole week? Is it 24-7 or is it just like business hours?

501. You, bitch. Nice boat, dickhead. Nothing I can do, madam. I'm off the clock. Some rules you just sort of think are maybe implied, like not bullying people or not being a naked guy in public. we talk about naked guys in naked guy

this comes to us from WKRG the Craig, naked man shot killed after emerging from Biloxi River visiting nearby home Oh, a swap man River man Visiting is an interesting choice of word Yeah true Knock it on the door just to say what up

People usually get shot for visiting Now obviously this is probably someone going through some distress and it is very bad they got shot and killed. It's just there is some language choices they've made this article that are utterly perplexing to me. A naked man who emerged from the Biloxi River and wandered onto the porch

of a nearby home was shot and killed by the homeowner's neighbor, according to the Biloxi Police According to a BPD news police I bet that news release is crazy. Crazy. Emerging from the river like truth coming out of her well, you know?

On Saturday around 8 p.m., police received a 911 call to the 11,000 block of Woolmarket Lake Road. The caller said they were not at home, but had seen on their ring doorbell camera a naked white man emerge from the Biloxi River, walk up their home stairs and step onto their porch. Dispatches said they received several calls from the area regarding the man. Now, if you didn't have the ring camera... You wouldn't have even known he was there. He's a borsal and man to you. Like, a naked white man would have walked around on your veranda and then probably left, and then probably left.

then you would never have known about it. Nothing would happen. Don't look at him. Don't look at the fucking porcelain man. Don't look at the porcelain man. Don't look at your ring camera. The homeowner called their next door and told them about the incident. The neighbor reportedly walked next door and approached the man explaining that the homeowner had asked him to check on the home and asking him if he needed help. The naked man reportedly charged the neighbor, at which time the neighbor fired several shots hitting the man, but he continued to attack the neighbor. Now, let's just Can we compare and contrast two phrases here?

Asking him if he needed help, phrase number one. Frase number two, at which time the neighbor fired several shots. Can I help you? Can I help you? I don't think any American has ever asked, can I help you without meaning if you don't leave right now? I'm going to kill you. Yeah, absolutely not. Did you ask it like Dirty Harry?

Did you have legs akimbo? Both hands on the gun asking, did you ask if you could make his day? Legs are kimbo? On your back? Legs up. Spread wise. Spread. Can I help you?

Maybe you can help me. Like that's just, you can't be, you've got to pick one. You also can't just kind of allied that fact in the news article saying, oh, he's asking if he needed help. You should say he walked over there with a shotgun and threatened the man. Probably seems like a more apt description. You're not asking someone if they need help with a gun in their hand. No. You didn't just take your gun out there and be like, are you good, dude?

Are we good? Are we good? Can I get you anything? Legs are kimbo. Wide. Spread wide. Bet over, head down, putting a gun between your legs. Can I help you?

Head down, ass up. Guns out. See anything you like The naked man disarmed the neighbor Then walked away from the home And got back into the water Wow

Riverman Yeah You saw the river man Yeah Swampman Riverman He came out Didn't do anything

threatening Until a guy with a gun approached him Disarmed him Took the gun And went And now I must return to the water It sounds like

A woman counted swamp thing. Yeah. I think, yeah, river thing, yeah. River thing. Although I guess... There's rivers in the swamp. Probably swamps connecting, rivers connecting the swamps. From the river to the swamp.

Can you even say that in Queensland? Probably not. Yeah. You're going to fucking arrest me, Chris a fully? You little pussy bitch. You little bitch. Come arrest us all, you little bitch. Yeah, Adrian Schrenner.

I'll rip your fucking tug out. I'll rip the dick off. Rip your dick off, Adrian Schrinner. From the river to the sea, motherfucker. we're never going to get in trouble because this podcast's not famous so we're like fine right we're fine you can say that you've got to rip the lord mayor's dick off because you've said a prescribed phrase and i don't live in the same state as you guys so it's not illegal for andrew to say it though i wonder if because the published is still too scared to say if the podcast is

published from brisbane are we legally is this would you get extradited to queens From the river to the sea, I'll rip your dick off. From the river to sea, I'll rip your fucking dick off. Shrina, Chrisa fully, Jared Bligy. I'll fucking kill you, Jared Bligey. Absolutely stupid fucking names too. Emergency vehicles could not reach the area due to heavy flooding, according to officials, so officers had to be transported there by boat.

Okay, so there's a flood on? There was flooding happening? Yeah, I don't know. This is all. What going on? But he didn't get shot, right? everything didn't get shot. Yeah, he was.

It sounds like they might have killed a mythical creature. That's all I'm saying. It does sound a little bit that way. I think you've done something bad. What they probably did is they probably just murdered a homeless man. Yeah. Which is not ideal. A mythical homeless man.

Emergency vehicles couldn't reach the area due to flooding. When they arrived, they found the neighborhood scrapes and bruises on his face. They reviewed the video from the home security system, which had recorded the entire incident. They searched the area for the naked man using a rescue boat. The man's body was found on shore on that joke. area about 2 a.m. Sunday, the man who died has not been identified. Oh, man.

I'd just like, try. Open fire on someone is just insane. Like, because they're trespassing in your house. This is like sopping wet man during flooding and like your first instinct to was to go over there with a gun. Kill. These people are fucking sick. Guys have a fucking brain disease.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Diseases. You could find those. in nature. We talk about the natural world

in Nature Corner. way in on newly discovered northern green anaconda. I was waiting. I heard about the newly discovered northern green anaconda, and I was like, fuck. What's rodent pro going to say about this? Rodent pro, the industry leader in premium quality animal nutrition and supplies since 1993, is sharing its perspective on a major shift in reptile science,

the identification of the northern green anaconda, eunectes Akayima, as a species all in its own. For decades, the green anaconda was treated as one single species. However, new genetic research has confirmed that populations north of the Amazon Basin are actually a separate lineage. This isn't just a win for biology. It's a discovery that has reptile keepers, breeders, and zoo professionals rethinking how we approach the care of these massive constrictors. Okay, so this whole time, you've been looking at your anacondas interchangeably thinking you can treat them the same. And now we know...

There's a different species. You've got to treat them right. Quote, good husbandry starts with truly knowing the animal in your care, said the rodentpro.com team. You must love them. You must make love to them. Yes. That's good husbandry. Yeah.

You cannot truly know an animal. A discovery like this is exciting because it challenges us to look closer at everything from nutrition and enclosure size to specific breeding habits. I thought for a second that he thought maybe that like, well, because one anaconda species can actually be two, maybe all things in the world need a closer look. A closer and closer look. But he just means you've actually got to be more sort of careful with the type of fish tank you're putting a bit of stuff. It's a beautiful sentiment before. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. As more data comes in, we want to make sure our community has the tools to adapt. The data shows a 5.5% genetic difference between the northern and southern line. To put that in context, humans and chimpanzees only differ by about 2.2%. That's a massive biological gap for two animals that look so similar to the naked eye. That's crazy. This is actually fascinating. Doesn't that mean we're basically the same species as chimpanzees?

Is that what they're freaking tell at us? Is that what they're trying to tell us? That we're more chimpanzee than these two identical looking snakes are the same. Yeah. Isn't that fucking crazy? That's crazy. Let him out of the zoos. Free him. Right now.

Let him out. And you know what? All right it. Free the rest of them. Bring them all. Give drivers licenses. Guns. Give Anaconda a gun. Diesel needs to start manufacturing one-legged jeans for the snakes. They're people too.

Eight-legged jeans for the spiders. Oh, I saw that movie. Jesus. So I just believe these two species weren't their separate ways. roughly 10 billion years ago. While they're hard to tell apart at a glance, the northern green anaconda tends to be darker in color, and some researchers believe it may actually grow even larger than southern cousin.

For those working with these animals every day. What's the southern cousin sound like? Howdy y'all? I'm a anaconda. Quote, there's still a lot we don't know about some of the world's largest reptiles, said the rodentpro.com team. That's what makes discoveries like this so interesting for the reptile community. It was genuinely very interesting.

Do they're like professional wrestling? Oh, because they love Diesel. Didn't Kevin Nash wrestle under the name? Big Daddy, yeah. And the jeans that we were talking about earlier. Diesel jeans. Probably wrestled against Big Pop a Pump at some point, you know? I hope so.

I certainly hope so. As scientists learn more about these animals, keepers and handlers will likely continue refining how they care for them. Pretty exciting stuff. Maybe you're listening to this and you didn't even know. You've got an anaconda, a green anaconda and you, but now

you have to go on a further journey journey of discovery. A journey of discovery, yeah. And be like, oh, is it a darker shade of green? You can never truly know an anaconda. You can never truly know another person, you know? Yes. In a way,

antacondas are a sort of microcosm of humans. That's so true. That's often much larger than humans. Often much larger. They're kind of a macrocosm of humans in a way. It's kind of a macrocosm. Now I did also want to use this as a touching off point to debut a new segment, but Lucy, I don't know if you finished making the theme for it yet.

Did you make the theme for the dripping report? You want to make the theme for the dripping report? Sorry, I'm just going to read the transcript of our chat here because, let's see, 25th of May. Andrew, do you reckon you could make a dripping report theme for stuff you can wear that's good? and then directly underneath immediately afterwards. Two minutes later, Lucy said, I will, I will. Did I say that?

Why did I say that? What time was it? Yeah, so it was 103 in the afternoon. So I was kind of hoping you would have made that by now. Interesting. Well, I will. I will. It's time for the dripping report.

It's on my list. It's on my list. It's on Lucy's list. Yeah, so it's for stuff you can wear that's good because occasionally I come across stuff where I'm like, oh, shit, that's the drip, which is probably a bad thing for an audio medium, but I think this one transcends having to see it. He's going to describe the drip. I'm going to describe a cool item of clothing that you could wear. Now, you guys know about Nike Air Force Ones.

You're familiar with the Air Force One, classic shoe, one of the most sold shoes in history. We're all kind of dripped out kind of people. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So launched in 1987, and they did a bunch of special releases in, sorry, launched in 1982, they did a bunch of special releases in 2007 for the 25-year anniversary of the Nike Air Force One. So that shoe is kind of common, the Nike Air Force One, 07. It's a slight redesign of the shoe, some modern tech in it.

You can buy those anywhere. but they released some very special ones at the same time that were released for about $3,000 a pair. A few key points of difference from the regular 07 Air Force One. The little metal, it's not an aglet, but on the Air Force one, there's a little metal bit at the bottom of the laces. A little metal thing, yeah.

Yeah, so that was like plated with 18-carat gold. Pretty awesome. They released two additions. There's a brown one made of crocodile skin, well, partially made of crocodile skin, and then there's a white one that was made with anaconda leather. Fuck. Oh. Is that not like the drippiest shit you've ever heard of your life?

Like I disagree with using an anaconda for a leather, but that's fucking sick. I don't think it's good, but I mean, if you copped a pair of those second hair, the damage has already been done and you rock up to the spot. Vintage anaconda leather. One of the guys is like, what the fuck, dude? Are those the Anaconda 07 Air Force Wards? Yeah, dude. It's a real anaconda.

There's something to think about it. You know, if you're a bit of a sneaker hand, maybe you already knew about this. But if you're looking to get like a bit of an edge, maybe. You've got a birthday coming up, Ben. That's true. It's my birthday very soon, four days. I could do it a new pair of shoes. I think maybe like if you're struggling to find a unique identity in your crew.

Cool shoes. You, well, like, I just think maybe if you rock up with the Anaconda Air Force One's on, there's like a pretty good chance they're going to start calling you like, if not Anaconda, which is a sick. Sick nickname. Sick fucking nickname. They might just call you like snake, serpent. Like, what if you were the serpent of your friend group?

Yeah. You can change your position in the friend group with a pair of, like, sick shoes for sure. A pair of like $3,000 shoes. Yeah. They're like, that's interesting because we only ever thought of you as Todd, but now I'm seeing you in the Anaconda Air Force Ones and I'm thinking, Serpent? Serpent? And like, people shortened to Serp, obviously. Yeah.

What up, Serpico. Kind of thought you were like a huge loser before, but I'm just kind of seeing you in a new life. Like you're okay to hang out with, but you don't have any, like, nothing that made me sort of, you didn't spring to the mind at the forefront of the list when I'm like, oh, man, I've got a spare a concept. at ticket tonight. You're not thinking Todd. You never think of Todd. I'm not thinking Romeo. I'm thinking Romeo. I'm thinking Romeo. Big Angel. Jerry.

I'm thinking Jerry. Yeah. I just wasn't thinking Todd, but now literally the only name I can think of is serpent. Oh shit. Serp would love to go and see this run DMC tribute act. I got tickets for.

A serpent to see the weekend? Maybe you guys are having a party. Everybody starts asking, is serpent going to be there? Oh, man, I heard Serp was going to be here. I haven't seen him. Have you heard where he is? Everyone's like texting Serp. Yeah. Yeah, man. Come through. There's big serp. The party's crazy. We're about to watch Johnwick three, dude. It's awesome. Serp, come through. Come through. Come through, Serp. He's dead. We're surpless. I don't know if, so this is unrelated to all of this kind of. it's sort of

I've been very transparent about the fact that the way that I choose stories for this podcast post politics is very heavily inspired if not entirely ripped off from the model of my favorite podcast

oh yeah dude and I was listening to an episode of theirs like from the first 100 episodes so this is like in 2007 and they were just sort of talking about like movies

that they had seen on the weekend and they spent a good 10 minutes talking about how awesome shooter is because they'd just gone and seen shooter at the movies oh fuck we've literally they've been to loving shooter but like 15 years fuck man they really did everything first

it's incredible great minds I mean yeah game recognized game obviously a horrible man beautiful movie and now did Antoine Antoine Fuqua made the fucking the Michael movie movie, right?

Really? Yeah, that's him. Yeah. But from what I've heard, they get right into it. Last half hour is about how that guy's a pedophile, I'm pretty sure. Oh, okay.

Cool. It is. And the first half hour, too. They don't mention it. That's the sequel. It's just two hours. It's just like, oh, no. Singing and dancing,

and then the second one's all about the pedophile stuff. Just to make sure as many people go to the second one as possible so you can really hit them hard. Really hit them hard with the petto stuff. Do you reckon like there's just a big young generation that it's distant enough that no one cares? Like that feels like ancient history.

I think the reputation, I think the reputation management by Michael's estate over the last chunk of time has been very effective. I mean, what do you do to manage that reputation? How do you negate the idea that that guy is a pedophile? I think you mainly, you focus on the music. off. Oh, it's probably the music. Just kind of the dancing and the moonwalking and stuff. Yeah.

And the moonwalk, pretty cool, I guess. Cool, pretty cool. Great music. Didn't you steal that from someone else anyway? It wasn't, I don't know. I don't worry about this shit. I would like to know if there is a, like, a coherent argument that he didn't do it. But like, like, you know, there's like the crazy argument that he didn't do it, which is people

that are just super fans are just like, no. No, he would never. McCauley Culkin saying he didn't do it. That's, that's a key. one, yeah. And what's his name? Corey, Corey Feldman,

says it too, the alive one, who dresses like Michael Jackson and attempts to dance like Michael Jackson in public in every opportunity. Like, I'm operating on, most of what I know about this

is from other kids telling me when I was in primary school and I've never looked into the details and I just, I'm like, yeah, that guy probably. Big topic of conversation at primary schools in the 90s, hey?

Yeah, that's kind of all we had. It's kind of all we had. It talked about how Michael Jackson was a creepy pedophile with a pet monkey. And how Marilyn Manson got his rib cut out to suck his own dick. Yeah. It's kind of all we talked about. Yeah, didn't really have much else going on. We didn't have prestige TV.

We didn't have Prestige TV. We didn't have Oz. We didn't have the wire. We were pre-Oz. We'll probably, Oz was around. Oz happened and then we didn't have to talk about that stuff anymore. Yeah, that's right. Hey, thanks HBO.

Hey, this is definitely an episode of the podcast, Bonta Vista. At this stage, at time of recording, we are two weeks and about eight hours away from the Brisbane Live show. Plenty of time for you to not only get tickets to the show, but to get tickets to travel to Brisbane. Have you ever... Get on the fucking train. Staycation. Get on the train. Depending where you live. Yeah, I mean, Theo had the world's worst experience doing the long distance trip by train last time he did.

But you'll probably have a great time. You'll probably have a really good time. I've already sent out my recommendations list to two or three people so far for things to do in Brisbane when you're alive. Beautiful time of the year. Oh, the weather right now is fucking spectacular. We just had a week of torrential rain, but now it is tops of like 18 or 19, lows of 11. or 12, crisp. Climb.

But we're clear, beautiful skies. This is felons weather. It is felons weather. It's got to have a stout at felons. A couple of pints of stout. A couple of bowls of chippies. Oh, bug roll. Bug roll at felons.

That's my recommendation for when you're here. Get a bug roll at felons. Pizza's there pretty good too. There's not a paid ad for felons. It's just literally the most beautiful spot you can sit while having a beer in the entire goddamn city. And the beers, no bad. Fine.

Bit expensive. Pretty expensive. The bowel room stuff, though. You got to check that shit out. This is, sorry, I've kind of lost the thread here a little bit. Live show. Come and see the live show, please. We're so, so fucking excited.

Woo. We are, I think we're catching up pretty quick on the exact number of tickets that we had last time. I want to see a couple of new faces. Like, I want to see. I do want to see some of the same, but I like to see some newbies. I want everyone that came last time to come. time because I would be very hurt if you decided, ah, you like that? Not really for me.

But in addition, I want to see some new faces. I want to see like a bunch of people like, oh, holy fuck. We've had one person who's already told us they're coming over from Perth. Very, very excited for you to see what a real city looks like. Are they going to beat you in the person who comes from furthest away competition? No, there's still time. You can destroy them. And that is the fucker fan contest too.

Yes. Yeah, yeah. But we will be, it's a limited pool of who's doing the fucking. Like you'll still be thrilled, but I'm just saying not all the options are on the table. Not all the options on the table. We can't fuck everyone. You know? We could.

If we were a really hardworking podcast, we'd try. We can try, but you know. Well, hopefully we'll see you and get to fuck you at the live show. Thank you so much for listening. patreon.com slash Buddha Vista if you want to sign up for a second episode a week every week. They've been crazy lately.

Crazy. Yeah, we'll speak to you soon. Bye. Bye.