Boonta Vista - EPISODE 453: Suck Me Off And See Who Instantly Dies

Episode Date: July 11, 2026

Lucy, Theo, Andrew, and Ben bring you: A flag code violation, conflicting accounts of an air incident, local scuttlebutt regarding the poopist, and controversy over the execution of Satan. *** Outro: Televangelist - Suitor

I know Nuggies. Hello and welcome to Buda Vista. Episode 453, I'm Ben. And in the biggest change to the podcast since we decided to become a comedy podcast, we've decided to pivot again to one of those fake porno podcasts where it starts out as a podcast,

but then we all start fucking and sucking each other. With me is Theo. Hi, Theo. Hey, buddy. Hey, hey. Hey. Are you sick of real women? Is that what they talk about?

I don't know. What are they say at the start of it? I'm less, familiar with this than you. Lucy, I haven't introduced you yet. You haven't seen these? Hang on, so this is a podcast. They haven't come up on your feet. Watch the podcast. Is it a porn that is about a podcast or is it a podcast that is like an audio porn? It's kind of both. Is it like a video? It's a podcast. What did you make it up? They're like. I jack off to non-pornographic podcast like a normal person.

You guys don't know about these. Is it just me? I thought you've seen these. Is this a bit? I think I think I know of. maybe one of these. I thought it was in the genre. Two notorious, awful people. The Adam 22 man. Oh, nasty man, yeah. And his partner, and they interview porn stars

for their podcast. And then also they fuck the porn star. So it's a video podcast at the start. I don't know if this is the one I'm thinking of. I've never clicked on one, so I wouldn't know. What platform are you seeing this on? Like a porn platform? Because of the changes that they made.

Right. Yeah. I'll carry my idea around with me. That's the thing. It's a multi-cam video podcast. At the start, they're sitting on couch and they're like, what's the biggest dick you've ever seen? Everyone goes, the girth master. And then 15 minutes later, everyone's clothes off, they're all fucking each other on the...

So it's just a casting couch, but they put podcast microphones. But I think they released the podcast. I think the interview is actually part of it. I don't know. These are also people who've been successfully. cast in many pornos. They've been cast. The casting cast concept is like

that you're an engenue, right? That you're new to this. This is all scary. It's also, this is crazy. You might be an ingenue, you might be infant terrible. Yeah. Might be.

I think that's Portuguese. Yeah. But instead, these are all, these people are pros. Yeah, this is like A celebrity, like shooting the shit, like smartless. This isn't their first rodeo. It's like smartless if at the end, Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, and the Will and Grace guy all started fucking each other.

Okay. So at the start, they're just talking tales from Hollywood. Sean? Sean. Yeah, they're talking tales and then they're topping tales. I want to say his name is Sean Hayes. I want to say Sean Hayes too, yeah. Will Arnett.

Yeah. Jason Bateman and the rest. If he will. The all the stars are here. They'd be like I was hanging out my friend, I think one celebrity off the top of my head. Albert Camus. I was hanging at my friend Albea's place, Camus, by the way.

And then 10 minutes later, clothes are off. It's a fuck fest. The cameras are still rolling. I think they've pushed the microphone boom arms out of the way. Well, you wouldn't want it too close, yeah. You wouldn't want it too close. You just hear those squelching noises. There's a pair of panties hanging over the boom arms.

Now that's good. Yeah. That is good. That's nice. You should get a job in set dressing for pornographic podcasts. Also, the focus has accidentally pulled to the boom arm as well. Yes. And then it fades to black.

And we know that that means they had sex. Also with me is Andrew. Hi, Andrew. Hey. How's, um. Oh. Do, like, like, I'm, I'm really happy to be here. When are you going to suck on this?

Well, no, I think we have to talk first. Did you... Just go straight into it. What about the podcast? No, I think... I think that the sexual charge that comes from it is being like, wow, I've seen them in a casual setting. Yeah.

Of just a couple of people shooting the shit, chopping it up. And now I see them... They've got real minds. They've got things. They've got an inner world. But hear me out. Hear me out. See them in the world get explored.

This is a pivot for our show. Hundreds of episodes into the show. So people are very familiar with us talking and not fucking... The tension is huge. The payoff. We've had. We've had almost a decade. Oh, will they, won't they?

For a decade. And for almost a decade, we've landed on... They won't. They won't. They really, really, really won't. It's sort of a 0.001% will they... 0.99% on Calci, on Polyne. market.

It's a losing bet. It's a losing bet. It's a losing bet. We'll be extremely short position. We have the chance to do the funniest thing

here, Theo. Let's run up that number and then record an orgy and cash the fuck out of the show. I think you need actual people to fill the books out. This is just us. No one's listening to this.

And you can have your $5 back, sir. Yeah. Plus, we get to fuck. Yeah, finally. Well. I don't know about you guys, but it's... Get this out of the way.

It's all any of us have been thinking about for 10 years, right? Yeah, and talk about. And most of them talking about. Also with me, socially paralyzed because she's watching me get railed by Theo, but I forgot to tell her about the format change. It's Lucy. Hi, Lucy. Hey, I don't want to be weird.

Like, maybe I'm being weird. Maybe this is like a normal social situation. You might have missed a cue. That I'm in, like, a cue. I'm not always across these things. So, yeah, you guys are having a good time, I think. Hearing Theo say, woo-hoo, quite a lot. So he must be enjoying himself.

This is fun. Very interesting on your phone there, Lucy. Oh, yeah, I just got a lot of work texts. Oh, work texts. Emails. Just got a fly to dance for 15 minutes. Yeah, until you guys are done, I guess. I'm trying to sign into the corporate teams account on my phone.

Oh, I've got to put in a pin. I don't know my penis. I'm going to set off an authenticator. All the rules look red there. All the authenticators. Yeah. I'm going to be really buried in this for a while, guys. You go ahead.

I'm just, I'm Googling porno podcast that turns into a porno. Just to see if that gives me why. I feel like porno podcast is already going to get you most of the way there. Yeah. Well, no, no, because it's just getting me erotic podcasts. Which is obviously, this is,

I don't know why we're not featured on any of these lists. Yeah, if you say porno podcasts, there's going to be ones that are like the audiobook equivalent of the of the smart books. Yeah, there's just guys doing smart stuff. But then I think there's also going to be porn podcasts that are about

guys who jack off to a lot of porn and they interview porn stars and talk to them about the business, but they don't fuck them. They don't fuck them. That's the thing that I think exists too. This might be maybe what I'm looking for. I can't get through to it because of the thing, but does come up in the Google search preview.

This podcast episode is called Sex Podcast Devolves into Crazy Double Penetration Cream Pie Threesome. Oh, okay. Now, I don't think these guys are following our ruling convention for naming, which is it has to be words that were spoken aloud in that order on the podcast. But... Yeah, they're more describing. Now that I've said the phrase,

Sex Podcast evolves into Crazy Double Penetration Cream Pie Threesome, we could name this episode. We could. Why couldn't it be? What's stopping us from calling this episode, Budavista episode 453, Sex Podcast evolves into crazy double penetration. Yeah, I mean, look,

when it comes down to it, all rules are basically social. Yeah. You could do anything. And it may be broken. You could do anything. No, rules are made to be followed.

Hey, if we did end up all fucking each other halfway through an episode, that'd be one hell of an anecdote. We're talking about anecdotes in, anecdotally wild. Welcome to yet another totally wild episode. So some friends of mine, they work at a brewery, good brewery, make lots of good beers.

They had an event on the July 4th that was sort of America themed because of America's birthday or whatever. Oh. Had some like tasty American-style beers and stuff. Did some American-style food. It seemed like they had a lot of fun. The day after, they got a one-star review, and I would like to read. that one star review to you guys because this has been making me

crazy. Out of five. Yes, this is not a Roger Ebert four star max review system. This is a five. It's also not out of a hundred. Yes, just to make it really clear, we're using the standard number of stars that Google Maps uses.

Yeah, I was thinking one out of one. Either you like it or you don't. And that's how I treat most movies generally. I don't want to think about it. I liked this 60 What are you talking about? Yeah, and don't even get me started on pitchfork. You can tell me an album's at 8.3 versus an 8.2.

Do they do that? Is it that granular? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought they just went to halves. That's stupid. No, no, no, they are basically. They're a percentage scale, right? But it's out of 10. It's fucking insane.

It's fucking crazy. Is it an aggregate of several pitchfork reviewers? No, no, but they pretend like it is objective. So they will go back and revise prior ratings so that they can be on the right side of history. That's so cowardly, isn't it? That's so miserable. And like coming out like saying like fucking 10.0 for the white album or something, man, that's so crazy of you to do that.

To think like, oh, that's good album. Do you think maybe you're on the record saying that? It's kind of 9.7 to me, I think. Yeah, 9.7. Nothing's perfect. It's too long. of the McCartney's grandpa songs on it.

Yeah. Stupid. It's not a hundred percent. Kind of more like the shite album. Yes. Thank you so much. Wow. Yeah.

Paul McBlaughtney. Yeah. The bottle. Paul McCartney. Yes. Yeah. Okay. Beatles are pretty good.

Yeah. I don't want you guys to yell at me. I just don't. I mean, they did some good stuff. The Beatles did some all right stuff. I just think let's talk about some other bands for a bit. The monkeys. Let's talk about the monkeys more.

Genuinely. Hey, do you guys remember that TV show, the sea monkeys that was kind of like the monkeys TV show, but also they were sea monkeys? And then you could, there was, because it was based on merch. It was based on the toy, which was Brian shrimp. Yeah. That you could grow and then you'd have little shrimp friends. Yeah. But they would like the monkeys or was it just?

sea monkeys. Well, the opening titles, I think, was kind of a parody of the monkeys. Sea monkeys only exist by virtue of the toy. There's no such thing as a sea monkey. Sea monkeys exist. No, well, they're not sea monkeys. They're brunt shrimp. Hey, how about this?

Sea monkey do monkey. Okay. And what happens? I don't think you're allowed to do that. And just to bring things full circle, The song, Why Don't We Do It in the Road by Paul McCartney, was about the time he saw two monkeys fucking on the road and he thought, why don't people do that? Yeah. What?

That's true, by the way. That's true. That's true. Why don't we do it on the road? In the road? Speaking of fucking monkeys, when I was a kid, ooh, Davy Jones. I would. I only really know Dave Jones from his appearance in the.

The drowned guy? The monkey. He was in. the Brady Bunch movie, right? Yeah, he was in the Brady Bunch movie. Did you guys look at the picture to the post of the sea monkeys? Like when Ross had a monkey on Friends?

Oh, my God. What's going on? She's not a good podcast, I don't think. Oh, I remember that. You remember that? Named Marcel. Marcel. Ross's monkey.

Ben, you know how like, I think current trends in pornography strongly suggest that lots of people... Don't say that when I'm looking at those sea monkeys. Lots of people saw particular things when they were younger, maybe a unicorn or Tony the Tiger. And then they grew up and they were like, that's all I want to fuck. I want to fuck Tony the Tiger's so bad.

As we've discussed on this podcast, I'd hate to imprint on the amazing live sea monkeys. They look so. Someone jacked up. They have like none of the elements of the brine shrimp. A brine shrimp. From which they're named. They are just horrible latex creatures. I can, yeah, I could get into that.

Well, there was a costume chari. I've seen some, right? I've seen some photos. I bet they're so fucking squeaky. Squeak on it! Went here to celebrate American July 4th and now 250th as an expat.

Saw the flags were backwards along the bar and informed to multiple staff about it. No one cared. This is offensive to us as we have strict flag laws. Bartender encouraged me to find other patrons to help me fix it like it's my job as the customer to run.

write this. Bartender basically said he couldn't be bothered, straight taking the piss for an event that is supposed to be, quote, in celebration of, never coming here again. Now... Okay, so you're American, right? For sure. You're American. This is the American brain on show. I'll post a photo in the group chat.

I want you guys to see if you can identify what the problem with... Oh, there's a picture? It wouldn't be a podcast without a photo. That's right. Picture of us all having... Have a look at the bottom there.

It's bunting. Jesus Christ. It's bunting. It's not like a flag. It's flag bunting. We're talking possibly A5 sized American flags and the issue that this gentleman has taken with the bunting is that the blue stars bit of the flag from where the observer is looking at it

is on the right. Whereas, according to the flag code, it should be on the left. They should have pantsed this guy at the bar. They should have given this dude an atomic wedgy. They should have thrown it out. Oh, look at his photo too. I don't care.

I should have killed him, I think. They should have hit him with a brick. Everyone should have joined in. 50 people kill one man. I'm sorry. I just want to return to the sentence. This is offensive to us as we have strict flag laws. Yeah, the flag code.

Biggest cuck shit I've ever heard. Every country has like a flag code. It's just no one in Australia would know what ours is because who's used to show. care. But to me, this is funny because it's not we have, because we believe in our flag and what it stands for and all that sort of stuff. Because of a code. It's two kinds of cuck, right?

It's flag cuck and law cuck at the same time. We respect our laws so much that this is, this is offensive to me. I can't imagine being like, you guys aren't obeying the flag laws of another country in your bar right now. Oh my God. Which is just to have American beer. Could you imagine going to the United Kingdom and. telling them they're flying the Union Jack backwards? You did a little joke because you can't.

Yep. Because it's symmetrical. It's good. So this guy's written a book. I thought you guys might be interested to hear this. Because I was trying to find his address so I could kill him. I found out that he's an author. This book is called A Weekend or the World, a complete how-to travel guide. Let me read a brief synopsis for you.

In his late 20s, Andre Watson, not going to beep that out, everything behind and traveled the world for seven months. When he finally came home, his friends and co-workers had a million questions. How did he save up so much money? How did he decide where to go? How did he stay safe, especially when he couldn't speak the language? So he decided to write a book. Most of the book is about all the money he saved by getting refunds,

by raising incredibly asinine objections with the venue he was at and asking for a free beer. And it's pretty crazy. You are a big time fucking loser. You are a huge loser, dude. If I see you in Brisbane, it's on site. I'm going to find you? Oh, you like craft beer, do you? Guess what, motherfucker?

I'm everywhere. Andre Watson, you are the Bonta Vista fucking loser of the week. Loser of the week. You are the dead chump of the week. It turns out like wherever you go. It's not like America. People are angry at you. And all, just because you're like, oh, the flags here are backwards.

I need to, you need to stop working what you're doing. You need to stop washing those glasses and fix the flag. And then for some reason, everyone wants to fucking kill you with a half-brick of stocking. Everyone wants to fucking smash your head in, like that dude in drive. I can't, like, so this was a massive day for them. Like the venue was booked out for the whole fucking day. This guy's gone to an American themed event, the country from which he is from,

in another city. How cool, lucky for him. He still gets to celebrate America's 250th birthday. A little slice of American pie. I don't fucking love it that much if you're an expat, did you, Andre? Yeah. Yeah.

Why'd you leave it? Fuckhead. Why'd you leave it? Fuck wit? I also can't get over being like you took 712th of a gap year in your late 20s. and wrote a book about it. You wrote a book about how you saved up enough money to go on a gap year, like, in your late 20s.

So you've been working for quite a while at that point. It were like three quarters of a gap year. Yeah, like fucking, and also what are your tips going to be? Here's how to blend in with other cultures. Complain if the flag is hung from right to left instead of from left to right. Don't learn other languages because clearly he didn't because he's already mentioned that. Don't learn the language of the country you're going. Quick tip, you're not going to understand what they're saying, so don't try.

Have you tried speaking louder and enunciating more clearly? While I'm talking about Brisbane-specific hospitality stuff, there's just one other thing that I wanted to read to you. This is just a sentence that has been perplexing me all week. It's kind of like a Zen Cohen. There is a venue in Milton that posted a thing today saying that it's temporarily closed, but informing the general public that they will be back under New York. management very soon. Back under new...

Back under. Back under. Back under new management. It's like back for the first time. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Why are you saying it like that?

New management. Back under new management. They're coming back and they got a new manager. They close down to like, you know... What do you mean? It's the same new... Oh, you're saying that the back is an independent clause of the new management. They've perhaps used punctuation incorrectly.

They're going to be reopening. Under new management. We won't return to being under new management. Oh, you're like, I see. So you've held on to this because of... Because I'm stupid. Fuck, I think this might be because I'm an idiot.

All right. Well, then let me hard pivot to something else. Okay. It's been related. Not hard be talking. You guys... Is it 20 minutes okay? Is that when we start fucking? Do you guys remember the band,

the butterfly effect. Yeah. Gone. Reach. A slow decay. A margot. Songs of that nature. Brisbane sort of...

In my universe, the song names are different. Are you... The butterfly effect. Did you get an ad in your feed? Yeah. Did you see this? No, I saw Carnival. Okay, well...

Are we talking about the same thing? No, we're talking about a different thing. This is their own tour. But what I wanted to point out was the name of the tour. The name of the tour is from the River City to the sea. Oh.

They're doing like a... Because, as we all know, it's illegal. If you're in Brisbane, right now, if you're in Queensland, it's illegal to say from the river to the sea. Yeah, you might even be on the Sunshine Coast, like, just for a little holiday. It's still illegal to say from the river to the sea. You can't say from the river to the sea. North of the river.

You guys are in the city. South of the river. Well, no, we're talking about the fact that you can't say from the river to... Yeah, we're not saying. From the river of sea. We're letting people know that we're not. You cannot. say from the river to the sea. We're letting people

know so that they know. You'll get in trouble. This is commentary. So they don't get into trouble, right? Otherwise, how will they know what it is that they're not allowed to say? Yes. How will you know? How will you know what you're not allowed to say? From listening to this one. Well, I think it's when the fucking brown shirts

kick your door down is what we've found. They'll helpfully tell you. In Queensland, they will then they'll tell you. Well, because we've been testing the limits. Not what I haven't been involved. Can the brown shirts say it? I think as long as it's commentary about it. You can also, so if you're singing the John Farnham song, they won't arrest you.

If your T-shirt has the phrase at a photo of John Farnham on it, they will arrest you. So I don't fucking know. You tell me. I don't fucking know. But the point is these guys, like the sort of early cross, alt-rock, new medal-ish kind of shit that I love when I was 14, they're back. And they've got good politics. And they're being cheeky, they're being brave. Yeah, that rocks.

That's cool is that. That's fucking awesome. That's cool. That's cool. Yeah. Back on our management. The butterfly effect. Back under new management. Oh man.

Speaking of management, the butterfly effect, I met the lead singer one time. After the butterfly effect had broke it up for the first time. I was maybe like 22 or 23 and I was so drunk. And I'd gone to see his new band playing afterwards. It was like, hey man, love your work. Don't really like the new stuff at all. Hate the new stuff. but I love the old shit you were doing.

You shit. You're so horrible. Yeah. That was like a week of anxiety, I think. I was like, I'm just never going to talk to anyone again. I think if I don't talk, I could never hurt myself. So I'll be fine. Yeah, and those around you, yeah.

Yeah. And then, you know, look at me now. Yap it away. Fuck, begins here. What, an album. Consequence. Oh, crave? Oh, forget about it.

Without wings. Come on. Never heard him. Hey, you know what does have wings? A plane. We talk about those in plainly speaking. This is your captain speaking. Please return your seat to their upright positions

as we are coming in hot on another edition of plainly speaking. Is any of that any good? That seemed really tenuous. It's really borderline, not podcast material. Here we go. I think a lot of it today is. Yeah, we just won't talk about it. Sent into us by listener Will.

This comes to us from the BBC. Man nearly sucked out of window midair on Ryan airplane, passengers say. Sucked off on Ryanair? Sucked off on Ryanair? That's one of my nightmares. Yeah, this happened to a lady a few years ago. She got her head sucked out of the window and she died from like blunt force trauma. You know what's really good is being able to say, oh, that actually happened to someone a few years ago.

Because mostly now with how interconnected everything is, everything's happening all the time. There's so many things happening. And time isn't linear, so everything is kind of happening. Everything will already have happened. Everything that has... So it's still happening. It is happening and has happened. And will, yes.

Heptopod B. From hitting the window? Like her head? No, I think from like the... I don't know. The force of the air. The force of the air. And then everyone's just got to hang out with the dead body for the next little while?

Put a plane. And what else you're going to do? You don't have to chop it up. That's a bummer. Well, the seats might be full. You like friends? Fuck, man. Anyway, pick the aisle seat.

I'm never. It could happen to you. I don't care if I might get sucked off out. I'm sitting in the window seat every time unless my wife wants it. That's what I'm always saying on the plane. Suck me off and see what happens. Suck me off and find out. I'm going to get sucked up on this flight.

Suck me off and see who instantly dies. If I'm going to go. down I'm taking you with me. That's the plot of Boas's afraid, by the way. A man was nearly sucked headfirst out of a cabin window in, in mid-air on a Ryan airplane, passengers have said. Tracking data shows the plane was in the air for about 10 minutes. Oh, what had abruptly descended 9,000 feet with passengers telling local media they heard,

quote, some kind of explosion. Some sort of raucous back there. Some sort of something. A Greek hospital officials said a 61-year-old Serbian national was being treated for friction burns. Quote, his wife held onto his legs for around five minutes to stop him from being sucked out. McAulis. Friction burns from being sucked out?

Grow up. If you're getting sucked out and you start getting smoked and friction. How many minutes into hanging on to him do you think before the wife was also just trying to get a look at her phone too? Yeah. I mean, what are you going to do? Kind of boring. Five minutes is actually like, it's. Just sit there for five minutes.

It actually feels pretty long, you know? And then the hostess is like, sir, please, please pull your head inside. That's funny. And he's like, ah, man. That would have been good for one of the flight it turns to be like, come on, pull your head in. Yeah.

Knock it off. Stop mucking about. And then what would he have said and what would it have sound like? I think mostly. That's Serbian. I like when the articles say like Serbian National. That sounds like some Jason Bourne stuff to me. Yeah.

You're not hearing about like an, I don't know, are you hearing about like an Australian national? I feel like they're wheeling that out for like the Serbians for some reason. Yeah. They're wheeled it out for the Serbian. I don't know why. I don't know why they're terming it like that. A Serbian man.

national, Serbian national. Yeah. Chinese national? I feel like you hear Chinese national. A lot in Australia. Maybe he was not ethnically Serbian. Is that the thing? Well, what makes the Serbian?

Do you think they'd be wanting to get into that in the article? Like, oh, no, no wonder if he was ethnically Serbian, so we've just got to make it more explicit. He's actually Croatian. And what is a nation? What is a nation in the first place? The city and the city, dude. Yeah. Time to spend 30 minutes.

It's pondering the true nature of the Serbs. Well, they've spent a lot of time pondering it, so it's not fair that we have a go. And these are jokes about borders. They're not like, anyway. About Serbians. Although, in a statement, Ryan A.S. It's Friday morning flight from the Greek city of Thessaloniki. Is that right, Lucy?

I haven't been. Never been to Greece. Never been to Greece. To Germany's Memmingen returned shortly after Tassoloni. take off when a passenger window dislodged in flight. Quote, the aircraft landed normally and passengers returned to the terminal. One passenger requested and received medical assistance on the ground, the Irish budget airline said, this sounds fine. The way the airline is describing it.

That seems like not a big deal. This seems like a big deal. Also that they're putting it on the passenger. They asked for medical assistance. The guy that was sucked out the window. I was like, Can I, hold on. A hospital? Can I get it? Just to be clear, does it say that it was the guy who was a medical assistant? It just says a passenger, right?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's me one row back. I shout myself during all of that. I'm going to need. Oh, I got a really bad hangnail. Meet me on the tarmac.

My ears. He was only partially sucked off, I'm seeing. Partially. Just, yeah. I only sucked off, it's going to be crazy. I only sucked off from the head. Sucked off from the head down. That's where most of the nerve endings are.

It added that a replacement aircraft was arranged to bring passengers to Memmigan several hours later. Yeah, the other one's got a hole in it. That's right. It's a hole for getting sucked off. Passengers, please be warned that your connecting flight has a hole in it getting sucked off. You won't want to use it. You don't seem like you'd be into that.

Engineers are heading to the hole. Passengers have told local media the man was left hanging headfirst out of the window as far as his shoulders before other passengers managed to pull him back inside. Why don't they move him? Yeah. Those on board have also said the window was smashed by pieces of the jet's engine, although Ryanair has not commented on this. I feel like we're getting two very different narratives.

Two very different narratives from Ryan. A window dislodged and someone asked if they could go see the doctor, I think because they had a sore toe. Sometimes windows get sweet-y-ed-ed-ed. The engine exploded and a guy got sucked off. And then in a week they're going to do like funny tweet replies about it being like, he-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-you-get-you-get-up. You know, they'd be doing that. Ryan Air rep saying, I feel like we're all describing a plane that landed.

I feel like we're all describing an incident where no one died. Don't understand what the big deal is. Yeah, there's so many things going on. There's Trump in the White House. Yeah, it's literally Trump in the White House. There's literally Trump in the White House. And you're worried about a guy that didn't die. So we're upset about a deathless landing.

If a window dislodges anywhere in the world, is Ryanair supposed to apologize for it? We turned around. We got a new plane. Yeah. It's bolling, by the way. It's a 737-800. Quote, we immediately realized there had been a decompression. There were screams.

For a moment, I thought someone had accidentally opened the emergency. urgency door. Christina, a fellow passenger, told Radio Thessaloniki. That can happen? No. Christina, I love how you know air terminology. That's awesome. Do you like planes? Classic, classic decompression. Like, you knew straight away. Yeah. Yeah, classic. Quote, the mask dropped and there was a strong smell. The head and shoulders of one passenger

were outside the window. Fortunately, he hadn't taken off his seatbelt. That's good. That's great. The strong smells? Matt. A strong smell. A guy shot himself. Yeah, like the smell of the smell of the one. a 61-year-old Serbian national shitting his pants because he believes he's about to be ejected into heaven

just an insane unthinkable death that would happen to basically no one except that one lady briefly into heaven before plowing into hell. As all Serbs go to. Serbian down.

Serbs go to heaven. Croats go to hell. I'm not ready for Yes. I don't. Believe that. Another passenger, Sophia, told Radio Thessaloniki, quote, When the oxygen masks dropped, we had no idea what was going to happen.

We didn't know whether we would make it back. We were sitting at the back of the aircraft, and we realized there'd been some sort of explosion. We thought the plane was going down. The decompression was extreme. It felt like we couldn't breathe. The man who was injured was bleeding and then lost consciousness several times, most likely because the lack of oxygen and the shock, Sophia added.

Everyone that they're talking to is like... Very knowledgeable. I don't think this is real. I think these are Ryan implants. This is a plane full of Serbian nationals, full of Jason Bourne types. They're all operators. They all know about decompression. Yeah, it's a shock.

He's going into shock. Fortunately, I already had my surroundings perfectly mapped out. I was ready to exit. I'd made a makeshift parachute out of the vomit bag and the in-flight menu. I was doing the thing where, you know how when you're a... You know how when you're a man in any given public space and you have to be clocking all the exits, you've got to be aware of where all the exits are

so you can protect everyone. And as soon as that window blew out, I was like, third exit. New exit. New exit. New exit. New exit. And I have clocked it. Just a case,

just in case circumstances call for it. I won't sit with my back to that window. Yeah. Yeah. In case another man comes in and you need to hold your social socials. status. Yep.

Just turning, turning towards that window instead. And look, it's not a door, it's a window, but I think I could execute a perfect running dive. Won't touch the sides.

And I'm out. Goodbye. God, in the form of a Ryanair hostess, closes the door, but then God, in the form of faulty glass, opens a window. Exploding engine.

Exploding engine. I think it was an exploding engine. Allegedly. What the mysterious ways. Carlos, Giannarchos, president of the Panhellenic Federation of Public Hospital employees, later said that a 61-year-old Serbian man was being treated in hospital with friction burns. Quote, he's in shock, but he remains conscious, he added.

The aircraft believed to have been an 18-year-old plane was operated by Ryan Air's subsidiary, Malta Air. So Ryan Air is Irish. They have a Maltese subsidiary? dodgy Maltese subsidiary? You got a little like Maltese airline under your wing there? That's nice. A little Irish Maltese.

What would that sound like? First, what do Maltese people sound like? Weird. You ever heard like the Maltese language? Is it like a, is it a Hellenic language? No, I don't know. It's like... Of Greek origin?

It sounds like Arabic. It's very strange. It's like no other language I've heard. It's really odd. Cool. It's actually normal to me. Yeah. it's beautiful.

Interesting. So it's a, it's derived from late medieval Sicilian Arabic with romance super strata? It's really weird. It is like, it's really odd.

That's what a crazy combo. It's the only Semitic language officially written in the Latin script. Now that's, you learn something every two or three episodes of Bonta Vista. Yeah. Oh, okay.

How about this? These are the dialects of Maltese. You ready? Central, Western, Eastern, Port Maltese. Zurich, Mghar, Zlaugja, Zha, Choirre, Khmerer, Zalterni, Gossertan, and Australian. Australian. Australian Maltese.

Yeah. Of course, we have a big, like, Maltese diaspora. We do. We have a diaspora. But I don't understand them because I only speak Port Maltese. Maltese. Yeah. My first dog was actually one of those.

Australian Maltese. I thought you meant Port Maltese. He's got a little block worker's jacket. He's a stevedore. A tiny little stevedore. He's stevedorable. Now that's good. Little terrier fella.

Fasalongos airport operator, Frawport Greece, said, quote, the incident is currently under investigation by the Hellenic Air and Rail Safety investigation authority. You definitely lump those two in together. Yeah.

You're getting a lot of the rail guys pitching in on this? Yeah, they weighing in. Yeah, looks like the window fell out. Classic. Might have been trains all the time. Might have been a derailed up there. I don't know.

Yeah, probably a signal error, I think. Fragport, Greece added that is fully cooperating with all relevant stakeholders and has activated the established emergency response procedures following the aircraft's force return. That's right. The emergency response is your wife has to grab your legs. Yeah. Ah, quickly. And in response to this incident, we're deploying more wives to our flights. Two wives for every passenger, just in case. Start having their safety row briefing. Is anybody here

not willing and able to hold the legs of an adult man whose head is being sucked out the window? Oh, fuck, they sat me next to a baby. Shit, shit, shit, shit. It can't even close its hands full of it yet. Can you put the baby at the window? I feel like I can hold the baby. I can hold the baby. I can hold the baby easy. I can one hand the baby and still like scroll on my phone.

Yep. Baby ain't doing shit for me. The Irish Aviation Authority earlier told the BBC it was aware of the incident and would provide any assistance to investigate us. Yeah, the window fell out because of an explosion. You need an engine exploded. They're just over here. engine exploded.

Yeah, we're all the way over there. We had nothing to do with this. We're doing our funny tweets. Chris Brady, a retired airline pilot, told the BBC the incident quote, could have been worse had the seatbelt not been fastened. Oh shit. Yeah, thanks.

I'm glad I needed to know you were a retired pilot. Thank God we asked a retired pilot. Goody had a seatbelt on. With all my years of, It's through the window? Industry knowledge. I can actually say that it's bad when that happens.

Yeah. And it's good he didn't die. But worse things have happened with planes. Yes. Yeah. Thia, I would answer you a question.

Let me ask you another question. Do you remember what happened with the bifid dolphin? I don't think it matters whether you fit through the window. I think you will fit through the window. You will fit through the window. Yeah, one way or another.

You know how like a... By hook or by crook or by implosion, yeah. You know, with cephalopods, like the smallest part of them can fit through a... And that's like their beak. It turns out on the human body, it's actually maybe about the size of your pinky finger. That could fit through anything.

Quote, we do as captains always say to the passengers, please keep your seatbelts fast. And there's a precaution in flight. Even when we switch the seatbelt signs off, why are you interviewing this guy? They say that at the start of every flight. Oh, when I was in America, actually, they were really full on about this. I think because turbulence have gotten so bad. Like they kept reminding people to put their seatbelts on all the time.

I'm not surprised by that. Who would? But you bet you're not American. Lots of people don't. They don't respect the rules over there unless they're flag rules. Yeah, they just respect flag rules and no other kind. If you don't put your seatbelt on, sir, we're turning the flag around. Don't make you turn the flag around.

I can't have the flag turned around. I put my seatbelt on, but I won't follow the speed limit. Quote. It's for exactly this sort of thing, or for turbulence encounters or whatever. It's a good practice to leave your seat belt on. Turbulance will suck off. It's exactly this or vaguely anything else.

Just keep your fucking seat belt on. Oh boy, hey, if you were on this flight, you could tell us about it, and we talk about it on a segment that we call You Report and We Decide. We report and you decide that's what we usually do. But sometimes we find out that something happened to you. Maybe you were posted up on the corner and you saw it with the guys.

Whatever it is, just let us know. You report and we decide. Oh, oh, oh. Mailbag at boltervista.com. Yeah. You report and we decide. Would you guys like to hear something mildly interesting about the Maltese language? What is this podcast, if not some mildly interesting things for the past hour?

Occasionally. Yeah. A 2016 study shows that in terms of basic everyday language, speakers of Maltese are able to understand less than a third of what is said to them in Tunisian Arabic and Libyan Arabic. Whereas speakers of Tunisian Arabic and Libyan Arabic are able to understand about 40% of what is said to them in Maltese. So, they're symmetrical. Not a good look for the Maltese people. Stupid Arabic.

That's what I'm hearing. It just makes them sound like that. Simple. I didn't want to say. I don't know any Maltese people. I'm not ready to make a judgment, yeah. Maybe they've just all got a lot going on. They're distracted.

Yeah. They might be Audi HD girlies. We don't know. A whole nation. I have two field reports in response to something we talked about the most recent bonus episode. This isn't the Puppist. We talked about a serial Welsh Pupist who was pooping in a pool. in Wales. I did it 18 times before he got caught. He forced the closure of the pool several

times. First thing we heard back was from listener TK who said, I live next to Newcastle, Emlin. My partner goes to this pool. I saw this comment. That's fucking crazy, dude. They might have been shooting in the pool. They might have swam with the pup. Or. They might have framed the apprehended pseudo-pupist. I have framed the apprehended pseudo-popist. I have another one here. This is from listener David, or probably pronounced it a funny Welsh way, hard to say. Dufford. Hi, Lucy, Theo, Andrew and Ben.

Hi. Thanks for putting me first. Thank you, thank you for putting me on the two. I wasn't even on the episode. That is true. You're still getting the hello. That's quite nice. So nice. I live just outside of Cardigan, not far from Newcastle, Emlyn, where someone has been shitting in the pool. A story featured on the most recent bonus episode, this isn't the popist in case you forgot. Thank you so much.

Thank you for the context for me. Four days ago, three days ago maybe. It's happening everywhere. Well, my partner has heard a rumor locally that the perpetrator was someone who worked at the swimming pool and the reason they were doing the poop was to get the weekend off, which is why it was happening every Friday. Hell yeah. It makes sense. It would be someone from inside the pool. Yeah.

The poop is coming from inside. She also told me that the person was forced to take the job by their mom, which I think is. funny and embarrassing. It's difficult for things to stay secret around here, but of course this is still just a rumor so your mileage may vary. Big fan and long-time listener, Duffin. Hey, we just want to be really

clear that we fucking love rumors. We love rumors. We just got a gossip or a rumor. Any source you got? We're interested. Spurious as fuck. I don't give a shit. We can't stress enough. Anything that you send

into us doesn't have to be true. It just has to sound good. name names. Name names. It's just got to be entertaining. Name. Names. This is,

this is, it's just like some 19 year old who just wanted to play fork knife at home. And then his, his mums make him work at the freaking pool. I will say,

which one's more embarrassing, though? Your mum making you get a job or being arrested for serially shitting in the pool you work out for a month. Yeah, you're just,

straight up. Yeah. She's like, walked you into the pool office with your resume being like he's a very nice boy and he just very much like to work. Archu. He's like, I want to play forknice. Don't want to be. Especially don't want to work on the weekends.

How are you going to buy your skins? How are you going to get, how are you going to pay for your V bucks? You know? Yes. I'm not paying for him anymore. It's ridiculous. You literally paid for a fortnight skin. You are. I paid for one fortnight skin. Lola Bunny. And it is, no, I didn't get Lola Bunny. All right. I've got to show. Hey, Otani. I have the So tiny skin and it's... I think you had a Lola Bunny skin. Why did you have had a Lola Bunny? There is a Lola Bunny skin, but I didn't get it because it felt...

I don't know. Too sexy? I kind of want to be like one of the guys. Why was she so sexy? She's so sexy. You didn't have to make her that sexy in Space Jam. It's weird. I haven't seen that movie in 20 years, but my memory is that the camera lingers on a midriff

quite a lot. Yeah, and she's pretty stacked. Remember that about it? Yeah. I just sort of like, she's wearing a crop and it's lingering across. It's like a slow peck and par pan across her midriff. We'll remember. We can all agree that she was presented in a very sultry manner

to the children that the movie was made for. They made her fuckable. And Bug Bunny wanted to fuck her. He wanted to get his dick wet on. We had one more thing written into us about that episode. And this was just a correction, which usually I don't air, but in this place was actually like a dereliction of duty on our behalf that we didn't point this out at the time.

And when we were, you know, laughing it up, gafforing even at the idea of Welsh Jackar, someone did point out, sorry, the listener, Lord Fart Squad, did point out that Dirty Sanchez, the other of the big three, is three-quarters Welsh. Oh. The three out of four of them are Welsh, apparently. I don't know how we miss that.

We will be tightening our controls. Someone will be fired. Someone will be fired. And you'll find out who? After we're done fucking each other. We made a mistake about dirty Sanchez, but hey, nobody's perfect. We talk about nobody being perfect

and Bobaddy's Nerfect. Pol body's perfect. No, Poe body's perfect. No, whoopsie, daisy.

Hey, Poe body's perfect. Is it still acapella if there's snaps in there? Yes. Yes. You can snap in acapella. You can snap in acapella?

Stampia. Yeah. This comes to us from WDKY and Kentucky. Church faces pushback over skit depicting devil executed by firing squad at youth events. Okay, that's kind of sick. That's awesome. What could be there to be complained about? It's the devil.

It's the devil. He deserves that and more. We can't shoot him with some guns. Can't shoot him, yeah. Half of the guys had blanks. So you don't know who pulled the trigger. They don't know. They don't know.

You can't change the rules just because you don't like how I'm doing it. Yes. But you would like to see him destroyed. How else are you going to cast him back down? Yeah, we do a lot of talking about vanquishing the devil. All I'm going to say is. No one's ready to put a bit of 30. Dirty World.

Dirty World. Yeah, let's hug the devil to death. Okay. All right. A Lexington, Kentucky pastor is defending a controversial vacation Bible school skit after a viral video appeared to show firing squad style execution. Pastor Dwayne Walker said the performance was intended to symbolize the defeat of the devil through what he described as the gospel gun.

Hell yeah. Like the John Wick gun. Sorry, not John Wick. Constantine gun. Constantine. Yeah. John Constantine. Imagine if they gave John Wick that one, you know?

Wouldn't that be fun? Yeah. John Constantine. John Wick. John don't know anymore. I'm not sure. It's not anything. That's anything.

It's not anything at all. We'll check the tape. And of course, the other character that he played, John Matrix, when he was the protagonist in Commando. He was John Mnemonic, wasn't he? Ironically, it was fucking, it was the. knockoff in equilibrium that had the crucifix flash. So they've got to get the guns from equilibrium. Give them to John Matrix.

Yeah. Then he's starting to blast the devil. This is the best podcast in the world. 50 minutes into this podcast, we start blasting the devil. John Utah. John Utah. Holy fuck. Johnny Utah.

It goes so deep. Johnny Constantine. Johnny Wick. Johnny Matrix. This is crazy. This is fucking huge. Johnny Matrix. A video shared on social media

shows four adults dressed in military star clothing carrying air rifles or paintball guns as they surround and repeatedly shoot a person on the ground in front of a crowd of children and adults. On the ground? This is a street execution.

This is not a... You're shooting the devil while he's down. Fucking awesome. He played Don John in the Buncha-N-Doo-About-N-N-N-N-o-N-N-o-N-N-o-N-N-ha-N-taptation. Okay. Don John Matrix? In the clip, the person thrashes on the ground as the sound of multiple shots erupt. Some scream, some cheer, while others join Walker and chanting, take him out, blow him up.

That's what I've got to do to the guy from the first story. Sick as hell. Blow him up. The soldiers then carry the individual outside as the pastor begins counting. At the eight second mark, the sound of an explosion can be heard. heard followed by cheers and screams of children. It's just good fun. It's just good, clean fun.

We're shooting the devil to be loads. Yeah. The video has drawn thousands of reactions with some viewers condemning the scene as inappropriate for a church event. Kathy Crow, a volunteer with the Kentucky chapter of Mum's Demand Action, is a retired teacher and Lexington resident. In a statement to NextAr's WDKY, she said the video depicts a major breach of trust.

Quote, like many who live here, I found this unbelievably disturbing, Crow wrote. Vacation Bible school in our churches should be safe spaces for children. Subjecting kids to a full scale, simulated tactical raid and firing squad is just an appalling abuse of that space. There was a tactical raid? Yeah. They checked the corners and the devil was in there. It was like those YouTube videos are those guys that build complexes for them to do like pretend raids on.

Yeah. But on the devil. It's on the devil. Again, what do you want to do? Just hang out with him? Just have chat to him? Yeah. What are we doing here?

Go on back to hell, you spooky devil. I think he's read the gospel. He just doesn't like it. I'm getting told off about this back in the deacon's office and just saying, I feel like I just have no idea what you want. You love the devil? Your messages are so conflicting. Very contradictory, very confused here.

You take a bullet for the devil just to show how Christian you are? In a video posted to Mount Olivet Baptist Church's Facebook page on Monday, Pastor Dwayne Walker said the clip lacks context and depicts the symbolic quote, killing of the devil. It's not symbolic. That's the literal killing. He physically killed him. You literally killed him.

You shot him until he exploded. Yeah. What are we doing here? If you shot him with a book of the good word, that would be symbolic. And confusing. How are we meant to kill him? Like, I mean, firstly, I don't think he can be killed with a gun. Like, that's just ridiculous, but...

Well, have we tried? And living according to the principles of the Bible. But have we tried? Well, it's not going to kill him, is it? Yeah. It's fine. He's just hanging out down there. What's he doing?

He's not doing. He hasn't been doing much since the 70s, I don't think. I think he's been doing stuff for a while. I think he's been doing the same thing for a long while. Well, I think he definitely offloads that onto other people. I don't think he's actually there with a big talk. Yeah, he's delegating for real. So you think we're going to, we should just go and round up the,

the lesser agents of hell. You think that's going to break the eternal cycle of suffering. He's not getting his hands dirty. Other people are doing it. It is crazy how cogent the arguments we make on this podcast. We're some of the logically smartest people alive. We're drawing in pieces from different... Quote, the clip you saw was simply killing the devil.

I'll be honest with you. If I could kill the devil every day and raise him up and kill him again, I'd do it Walker says. Andrew's right. Andrew's right. He's like, I don't know what you want from me. I'm a killing the devil every day.

I'm going to kill the devil all the time. I meant to be nice to the devil now. Is that what we're saying? Yes. Be nice to the devil. Otherwise someone will lodge a complaint. Get real. Mum's demand action are going to demand action.

Fuck off. Ooh, I'm scared. What kind of action? They want you to fuck them now. Yeah. They're horny and desperate. I've seen videos like that. I think this time in America's thing,

I don't think you should really like just kind of an newer children's the idea of the armed death squads. Probably not. Probably make them think that's strange for a little while. Because of the real death squads. Because the actual death squads. What are the kids going to do when they see the devil, though?

They're not going to know what to do. They're not going to know what the devil looks like. Devil's going to look like a, you know, a sexy lady. It's never what you think. It's not. It's not really. It's not really often. It's a really.

Sometimes it's Al Pacino. Sometimes it's Al Pacino. Sometimes Peter Stormair. Sometimes Jeff Goldblum, sometimes Vigo Mortensen. Sometimes it's... Who was the one in Lil Nicky? Oh, that was Rodney Dangerfield. Sometimes it is Tom Waits.

Oh yeah, sometimes it's Tom Waits. Sometimes it's Tom Waits. And the list goes on. Walker said the church has incorporated similar good versus evil themes into its vacation Bible school programming for more than three decades. He said the skits are used to teach lessons about resisting sin, honoring parents, telling the truth, and following Christian teachings. And having that thing on you.

Keep it yourself strapped in case you see the devil. He said recurring characters include the, quote, commandos for Christ who use the gospel gun to defeat evil. Hell yeah. In his more than seven-minute response, Walker acknowledged that some people may view the presentation as excessive. quote, again, you may think we went over the top. You may think it was a little bit extreme, Walker said.

Maybe you're right. But don't you believe that the devil is really using extreme measures in this generation? I don't think the devil has changed his tact over time. No. I don't think the devil gets better or worse. Like when there was a lot more lead paint, I think he was worse. A lot more reports of him. What more reports of him with the lead paint.

Walker encouraged critics to visit Mount Olivet Baptist. church and see the ministry firsthand. Quote, friends, if it offended you, I'm sorry that it did. That was not the intention, Walker expressed, but I would ask you to maybe be just and not try us and convict us without at least hearing what this thing's about. You summarily executed

the devil so hard he exploded. I think that it was just a explosion happened afterwards? Explosion happened on a timer? Well, they took him out to be exploded. They shot him first. Cronenberg explosion body. And then they dragged him out to explode him.

Yeah. And make sure that none was left. I guess. Guns inside, explosions outside. Yeah. And never the twain shall meet. That was definitely an episode of the podcast, Bunter Vista. Thank you so, so much for joining us.

If we missed any actors that have portrayed the devil, Claude Rains. Mm-hmm. Sometimes he's Claude Rands. Oh, what's the Dudley Moore? Sometimes he's Dudley Moore. Anyway, there's probably lots of those. And feel free to write into us about them. if you would like more of these episodes

perhaps you would like to find out what's the deal with the Welsh Popist which I strongly encourage you do you can sign up at petron.com slash Punta Vista there's so many fucking bonus episodes for you to listen to and a lot of them pretty funny like I was laughing

while we were recording them yeah I'm generally laughing so I think they're funny and Lucy rarely laughs in real life never almost never stony face I don't know where that's about she comes up as a huge bitch actually.

Never makes eye contact. It's like you never meet the real Lucy as well. Yes. What's going on beneath that face covering? You know what I mean? Sort of face obfuscation device that she has. I've met the real Theo though. There's no other depth to him than what you see when you talk to him socially.

Yeah. We'll talk to you on those bonus episodes maybe. We'll talk to you on the free episodes definitely unless you decided this was the very last draw. In which case, Sondara. Bye. Goodbye.

Goodbye forever. Farewell. We gave it a red hot go. Yeah. Thanks so much for trying. Sorry, we couldn't be enough for you, I guess.

Yeah. But you did listen to the end. The worst podcast in the world, I guess. Yeah. I guess we're terrible. I guess it wasn't even worth us trying. I guess you'd probably listen to the Adam Friedland show instead or whatever because he's got celebs.

Got some pretty good guests on there. He's really good guests on there. He's really willing to. say out of pocket stuff and they seem to appreciate it. You see he had a Rizzer on there. I don't know what that is. Bye. Bye.

He's a little gone.