Boonta Vista - EPISODE 47: Whip It Good

Episode Date: May 14, 2018

The whole crew is on deck to discuss Smart People Books, our current entertainments, an absolutely batshit motion being debated by the NSW Liberal Party and the Most Poly Man in the world. Support the show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista Merchandise now available: http://boontavista.com/merchandise _____________________________ Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista iTunes: tinyurl.com/y8d5aenm Stitcher: www.stitcher.com/s?fid=144888&refid=stpr Pocket Casts: pca.st/SPZB RSS: tinyurl.com/kq84ddb

Welcome to Pointe Vista Socialist Club, episode 47. That's right, the shows in midlife crisis territory. Shows getting a bit old, get a bit long in the teeth. It's thinking about buying a convertible. Maybe divorcing its wife, shacking up with a young lady who's only interested in money, only interested in the show's money. Unbelievable. What do you think of that, Ben?

It's a very detailed narrative. I'm mainly, I'm sorry, I was just in a sort of a reverie there because I got very sad immediately. The moment you started the show that I had gotten two very fantastic burps out right before you started doing the intro, not realizing the intro would come so soon, and now I feel like I wasted them. Well, yeah, you could have had them on record. I could have had them on record, but you missed out.

Ah, shame. RIP, those burps. I'll never see their like again. Uh, and how are you, Lucy? I'm, I'm good. Do you write these little intros early? Nope. Do you come prepared with these? Got a little narrative set up? Nope. I start completely blank and whatever just flits into my brain as I start speaking. It feels like you're trying to break up the formula.

It feels like you're trying to break up the formula. No, no, absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely absolutely to just just just just just just just just just just I I I I I I I I I I I I I I to. I to. I to to to to. I thi I'm thi I'm thi. I'm th. I'm th. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good, I'm good, I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm to, I'm to, I'm to, I'm to, I to, I to, I to, I to, I to, I to, I to, I to, I to, I to to to th. I th. I th. I th. I'm thi. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good. I'm good th. I'm good thi. I'm good th. I'm good thi. I'm good thi. I'm good thi. I'm good thi. I'm good thrying to break up the formula. Oh, no, absolutely not. I just like to, um, I didn't want to go back to the well of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy joke about, I honestly think we could keep doing that while the number starts with a four. Yeah, possibly even beyond we should be doing that. I'll bring it back at some much later point. that. that. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to to th. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. No. No. thi. thi. thi. No, thi. No, th. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. It, the the the the the the th. It, th. It, th. It, th. It's, th. It's, th. I thi. I's, thi. I's tooo. I's. I'm tot. I'm tot. I'm tote. I'm th. I thi. I th. I th. I that. I tell you what I'll bring it back at some much later point. Yeah When it stopped being funny and then hence becomes much more funny when we get to episode 420 bring it back then and I hope we don't get to episode 420 guys we're getting scarily close to 69. Oh, are we spicy? And of. And of course, we have Theo. Theo, I have a question.

Hey. Don't jump in till we ask the question. Calm down. Just try to show enthusiasm. Calm the fuck. Can't even jokingly chide him because it'll absolutely destroy him as a person. Be up for hours. I don't even know what my question was going to be, the theythe thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I, I, I, I, I, I'll, I'll, I'll, I, I, I'll, I've tho, I'll, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll tho, I'll tho, I'll tho, I tho, I tho, I tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. to tho. to tho. tho. tho. to tho. I don't even know what my question was going to be, Theo, have you read the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy books?

Of course I have. Yeah, I thought so. They're very good. No, then, are they? Are they? They still hold up. They're still very funny. Douglas Adams was a wonderful word, Smith. I don't th, I don't I do not remember laughing. You don't have specific

recollections of you lounging on a chair, reading a sentence. Okay, well you, you joke, but like I have those specific recollections for like catch 22. I see. I gave up halfway through catch 22. Oh, everyone does. This might indicate the levels of intelligence with which we are approaching these books. And life in general. Yes. I'm just stubborn. I've read the whole thing twice.

You've read maybe Dick. I've read like 40% of it on my Kindle. I got to about 7% I'd say, maybe even less. I quite enjoy it. I thought it was much more whimsical than you would expect for a book of its reputation. I don't recall getting up to the whimsy. It starts with whimsy. Every single year I check to see if I'm smart enough and old enough,

strong enough body of knowledge to read smart people books. In every goddamn year I find out that I'm not. Well, how have you guys gone with Ulysses? Oh, I read it in a weekend. I understood all the references, didn't even have to look them up. I've heard of it. I know I've absolutely heard of it. I'm a bit of a Joyce head. That's the, that's the book that defeated me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did me. Did th. Did th. Did th. Did th. Did. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. I. to. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I'm a bit of a Joyce head. That's the that's the book that defeated me. Did you try? Yeah, yeah, twice. Were you reading one of the versions where it's maybe three times? It's got footnotes telling you what every throwaway sentence is a reference to? No. Surely that it's twice as long. Yeah, but surely without it's indecifferable. I need the references personally. I'm trying to think of the last even remotely smart person book that I read. In fact I was struggling to even think of the last book that I read which is not a great sign. That's a fantastic sign. I did read a book recently called a, well one day in the life of Ivan Denisitch. It sounds like a smart person book.

Well yeah, but luckily it's really short. So... That goes a long way. Yeah, very, um... It's like dreary but uplifting. It's a, uh, like a guy in a gulag in Stalin's world, you know. And the whole thing is, uh, is just being like, oh I've just been holding on to my little worm-ridden piece of bread for a while. Oh now I have

to go on work detail in the snow for 80 hours. Cheery stuff. Cheery stuff. But beyond that I basically read Stephen King books because there's enough of them. And that's what I like, and I don't really have that much time to just sit down and read a book. I had a week without internet. I read like a million books in that time. I'm trying to force myself to actually get into the habit of reading again, because guys, it turns out it's really nice.

You get a lot of, sometimes they're funny or whatever, sometimes they've got knowledge in them, but the most important thing is that when you're staring at it and getting these funnies and the knowledge, there isn't a thousand people screaming bad news or insults at you while you're I go into the internet. So it's relatively relaxing. It's kind of the opposite of being online. Yeah, like while you're looking at the words, there's nobody standing next to you telling you who the person who wrote the words raped. Absolutely. No one is whispering, Vonnegut was a pedophile into my ear while I'm reading,

whatever the fuck the book was that I was reading. For the record I don't believe he was a pedophile. That was just an example. Well actually maybe I should just, maybe I should skip a right ahead because there was a question from friend of the show, Legends of Lucas, who asks, is there a lovely gentleman in real life, what a nice man. There you go. Nice young man. Who asks, is there a book game, TV show or film, that that that thiiii. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I I th. I th. I th. I I th. I I th. I I I th. I I I th. I I I th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. theate. theateateateateateateate. theateateatea. theateateate. theate. the. the. the. th. There you go. Nice young man. Who asks, is there a book, game, TV show or film your reading, playing, watching at the moment that you would recommend? Oh, um. For me, I just finished reading E&M Banks's last book, The Hydrogen Sonata. Oh, so you do read books. I never said that I didn't. It's very

good if you've read the other ones of his books and if you haven't this is just a general recommendation for his culture novels they're all fucking fantastic. He's a big fat communist and he's very very funny, very smart and his books are good. How about you Theo? Because I can't actually think whole thoughts with my brain as I approach the end of the uni semester I'm actually reading Lord of the Rings again like a huge teenage nerd. So, check them out, if you haven't heard of them, Lord of the Rings. Little books, you might like them. Well, I would say that if you have been wondering to yourselves,

is the 2017 remake of the classic 90s, death-related thriller flatliners any good, I can let you know that the answer to the the the the the 2017 remake of the classic 90s, death-related thriller flatliners any good? I can let you know that the answer is no. I didn't even know they were doing a remake. It's wild. They did a remake, uh, starring Ellen Page. What? Starring Ellen Page and... Castmate Lucy's boyfriend, Diego Luna Luna. I mean he's also my boyfriend

I don't know why you're giving him exclusive to Lucy. We're not Polly. We are not. He would not be Polly. Yeah okay well if you want to go that far in today detail you're also not really dating so go fuck yourself. Oh I'm sorry that was I feel terrible now. If you guys would like to watch a movie in which Diego Linner says, you have gone too far and then also just keeps doing the thing himself, you know, go for it. Also like a lot of remakes, I really like it when they take the original concept and then just over explain it and show you all the details. So great stuff all around from

2017's flatliners. I would say though that I did enjoy recently watched Ridley Scott's recent All the Money in the World which was that story of the, ah what's his fucking name, John Paul Getty thethird, getting kidnapped in the 70s. How much money does that turn out to be? Well, it turns out that when his 16-year-old most favoured grandson gets kidnapped, they say to John Paul Getty, hey, you should pay this ransom, and he goes, I got an idea, no. And then all the reporters say to him, oh, you should pay this ransom. And he goes, I got an idea, no. And then all the reporters say to him, oh, are you going to pay the ransom?

And he goes, I got a lot of grandkids. I pay the ransom on one. All of a sudden I'm paying all these ransoms. And they say, how much money is your grandson worth to you? And he says, none. So it's fun stuff. It's good stuff. Got Dawson's Creek's Michelle Williams in it. Oh, it's a pleasure. Michelle Williams. Oh, a very good turn. And a Christopher Plummer? Well, if we all recall, Christopher Plummer was bought in the 11th hour to replace one Kevin Spacey. Oh. Yeah, so he's that's he sick or something. Yeah he was feeling a

little off. He sprained his ankle during filming while tripping over to approach an underage game. Sprayed his ankle while he was tripped over and loudly announced that he is actually gay and that's all everyone remembers. Yeah that was the movie where during Kevin Spacey's Scandal, Like Ridley Scott... Is that a French word you just said? Scandale. Scandal.

Scandal. Oh, that's... That works. They, Ridley Scott pulled it at the 11th hour and re-shot every scene that had Kevin Spacey in it with Christopher Plummer in it instead. And I got to say, having watched the movie, sure as shit can't tell. There are other movies where you can very much tell that extensive reshoots have taken place.

For example, I don't know if any of you ever watched the the Josh Trank Fantastic Four movie? Is that the like the mid-2000s one? No it's the very recent... Jessica Alba? Oh god that's right. No, they did two of the Jessica Alba ones and they both had Chris Evans in them who survived and became Captain America. But no they did one a couple years ago that they got Josh Trank to direct and he's the guy who directed Chronicle, which was... Yeah, yeah, it was like a found footage movie, but like a found footage superhero movie. A bunch of British teens get a mind powers and one of them goes full... They weren't they? It had another of Lucy's boyfriends, um, Michael C. Johnson? Is that his name?

Why don't I think they were British? No, the guy, who are you talking about? The dude from Creed, you know? Oh, Michael B. Jordan. Michael B. Jordan, not Michael C. Johnson. Who the fuck? That's like the half-pr him. That's like the half-priced version of Michael B. Jordan. Yeah, Michael...

Michael... Michael... Do you got any Michael C. Johnson's? I was trying to remember his name. Come on, give me a break. We got a couple. But yeah, it's got that dude in it and... Um, that weird kid with a weird face. Anyway, I like the concept. It was very, it was well received and they got him to do this Fantastic Four movie and there was lots of scandal about him apparently being like fucking hammered on set and destroying trailers and all the sort of stuff. This is the director of the movie by the way. And so they did a whole bunch of reshutes with Adam. So there's a very distinct point in the film at which the film massively changes tone and what's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, the film, theat. I Iamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamamam, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, theat, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thatea, thea which the film massively changes tone.

And what's the name, Kate Mara or something who plays Invisible Girl? She's all of a sudden very clearly wearing a wig because this was months after they had finished shooting the movie and they got her to come back and she had already totally changed her hair, it's color and cut it off and everything. And they were like here, take this ill-fitting rust-colored wig, plonk it on. It did have Toby Kebbell as Dr. Doom, who was, he was the hot junkie dude from Guy Ritchie's rock and roller. I know right.

I quite liked that movie. I just watched again recently because I had a memory about it and I was like yeah rock and roller underrated I wonder if guy Richie ever is ever gonna do like a sequel? I hope he doesn't make any more movies. I think he should stop making movies since King Arthur which was incredibly bad. I've not seen King Arthur. I'm not going to see King Arthur. I'm not going to see King Arthur. I'm like a King Arthur story with a rock and roll-and-a th. I. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the th. I th. I the th. I th. I the th. I the the th. I the the the the the th. I had the th. I the th. I had the to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the the th. I had a th. I had a th. I had a th. I had th. I had to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the th. I th. I've not seen King Arthur. I'm not going to see King Arthur story with a rock and roller soundtrack. And it is really, it sounds good but it's so bad. I'm gonna watch that and then argue with you about it. I don't know if you will. I like bad movies and this is like this is beyond anything. And it's got Charlie Hunnam, it's just all bad. Oh, everything with Charlie Hunnam and it's bad? Not true. Not true. Let's not get into another spirited defense of Pacific Rim.

Unless you're thinking of something else with Charlie Hunnam in it, it's good. Pacific shit. Excuse me, can we never, ever talk about this for the good of our relationship as podcastos? Poshitfick Rim? No, no. Fuxific Rim. Is that better or worse? Uh, I haven't seen the sequel, though.

Anyway, these are all things that, um, dear friend of the show, Lucas can watch or not watch, really? Yeah, the first three things that were mentioned. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not that, no, no, not that, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that thi- thi- thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi. Shi. Shi-a, thi. Shi. Shi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-s thi-s-s-s-s-s shit-sit-sit-sit-sitififi-sitifi-sitfi-sitifi-s shit-fi-fi-fi-s. Shi-s that, dear friend of the show, Lucas, can watch or not watch. Yeah, the first three things that were mentioned, no, no, no, not even that. The first two things that were mentioned, check him out. The next 27 things that we talked about. Do I get an answer? Oh, we're just going to skip. We just don't want any women's opinions. Hang on again. I also, I also watched Pixar's Coco with my kids the other day, maybe cry a little. Got me.

Okay, so fucking, when I was flying back from Japan, I had like a really, I flew Jetstar, which was a massive mistake. And it was an overnight flight and I can't sleep on planes normally, let alone in a tiny, fucking jet star seat. So I had two whiskies short order and two Xanaxes, which I don't have very often. And then I couldn't sleep anyway. So I, my brain has turned to fucking mush. I am wide awake but completely asleep at the same time and I'm like, oh I should watch a movie. Oh that's right. Friend of the show,

Other Ben, told me that cocoa is very good. I put cocoa on. I watched it and I cried like a fucking baby for the last 10 minutes, just like weeping huge fat tears. Fucking beautiful lovely movie. I can't remember it because my brain had turned to dust. But ten out of them. Well I got I got double-dosed by the t, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, th, uh, th, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, to to to to to to to to to told, co-cold told told told told, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa, co-coa my brain had turned to dust but 10 out of them. Well I got I got double-dosed by that movie because I had just that morning gone out with my with my kids with my family and we're getting the kids a treats and my four-year-old the older one was like... Who are you a band from playing guitar? Who what? What? What? the kids a treat and my four-year-old, the older one, was like... Who are you a band from playing guitar? Who, what?

That's the thing from Coco? That's everything from Coco. Oh, yeah. No, well, wait for it, pal. So she had decided that the thing she wanted as like a treat, because I was going to get everyone a treat. Weekend with dad when I'm not at the office was headphones. She was like, I really want to get some headphones. I was learned to music and I was like, sure, whatever. And went out and got her some little kids noise-limited headphones. That were just what she wanted. Bought him home and set her up with like the iPad or whatever and showed her how to pick

some music and she was just like sitting there in the chair by herself listening to music and was just immediately totally lost and off in her little world and I just thought this is a really nice little special moment you know like I just sort of thought I wasn't going to think anything as fucking Normy as like, hey, I like music too. We have a connection. It's me, the one person who likes music and movies. But I did think to myself, you know, I've spent so much of my life with fucking, you know, headphones on or plugs in or whatever, enjoying music. It was just really nice to be there at the exact moment that she really experienced that for the first ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. ti. the the tmc, I tmc- I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. I. I th. I th. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I'm thean. I thean. I'm thean. I thean. I'm thean. I'm toean. nice to be there at the exact moment that she really experienced that for the first time.

And I even, I had a little tear. It was like a really genuinely nice parenting moment for me, you know. I feel it's a thing that will be etched in my memory. And then the same afternoon, we watched fucking Coco. And the whole thing is about how special music is and fucking memories of your family and all that sort of stuff. And I was like, God damn it, Pixo. God damn it, Pixar. You got me.

Sounds gay. Well, it was super gay. It was super gay. The kids had stopped giving it shit about the movie. And I'm sitting on the couch. So Lucy, what's your recommendation? I forget, what was the question? What are you, what movie or game or TV show or book or whatever the fuck are you enjoying at the moment? I'm obsessed with Anthony Bordain?

The chef guy, I'm reading his book. It's very funny. He's into sex and food. He's very good. He goes to like every country and eats their food and talks about their political climate. It's a good time. It's on Netflix. And I'm playing a lot of call it.

Does his jujitsu? Totally. He absolutely does jujitsu. Does he? He doesn't look like he does jujuts. He looks like a man that rolls. He used to be, he used to be a heroin addict and now he is a hardcore jiu-jitsu addict.

He's just so cool. Hmm. Now, I've heard that some people find him attractive. He's a that's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's a. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He's, he's, he's, he's, he's. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He's th. He's th. He's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he But yeah, he gets out there and he has a role with like the best Jiu-Jitsu dudes in the world, so good on it. Good on him to having a crack. That's actually his thing. He gets submitted as fuck obviously, but. He'll, he will roll with every chef he meets.

That's sort of how he says hello. It's impressive. Just starts tussling on the kitchen floor. Yeah, chefs that have never done martial arts and haven't been warred. He walks in. He immediately puts them in a leg lock. Yep. It seizes them. And that's how best you get to know someone.

It's much like the keymaker says. No, not the keymaker. One of the guys in Matrix Reloaded says, he never truly knows someone until you fight them. Well for the record, the guy who played that character was UN Wu Ping, who is the legendary martial arts choreographer who did all the choreography for all the Matrix movies. Serif, that's the name of the character. There you go. And he also directed lots of movies. He did all the chore the c the c the c. He the c. He the c. He the c. He the c. He the c. He the the c. He the the the the the the the the the the th. He th really th really thrue someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone thio-s someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He the the the the the the the the the the the the the the choreography for all the Matrix movies. Serif, that's the name of the character. There you go.

And he also directed lots of movies. He did all the choreography for Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. He did all the choreography for Jet Leaves, fantastic Fist of Legend. Oh, what a gun. Folks, if you want to see where all the fight choreography in the Matrix movies came from, go and watch Fist of Legend and be like, wow, just look at these parallels. It's very educational.

Welcome to Budavista Socialist Club. I believe it's a podcast about leftist Australian politics. I just want to talk about our favorite movies and stuff all the time. Oh, we got asked? You know? Yeah, that's a question of that. Well, if you'd like some politics, folks, get ready to get a big fucking dose up you. Because here, here's a story that peaked my interest this week. I don't think anyone would have said yes to a elbow deep shoving some politics up you? How many hands, how many hands go up in that room? Fist. How many hands you got?

Whoa! So I saw an article this week in the Sydney Morning Herald from a friend of the show Michael Cosio We're all just guessing that right, right that right right yeah, I don't know We better reach out to him and see if we're actually We're doing him a disservice But he had an article about a proposal being debated in a liberal party branch this week and boy did it jump out at me? So let me take you through this and I'm gonna have to read this article out and we're going to have to stop literally every sentence to try and just grasp what the fuck is happening, okay?

Sure, are you strapped in? Strapped in, taking a big old sip of water. Yes. Allow me to transport you to a branch of the New South Wales party, which is set to debate the merits of Sharia style corporal punishment and a radical proposal to make citizens responsible for sentencing criminals rather than judges. Great start, guys. The notoriously hard-write Carlingford branch under its colorful president, George Popowski. Oh, I love colorful people. Yes, it's like the guy sounds like he's horrific, but...

You know when someone's a character? Yes. Yes. The notoriously right, a hard-write Carlingford branch under its colorful president, George Popowski, will discuss a push to, quote, straighten out the law and order system, and quote, by handing sentencing powers to a panel of 20 members of the public, with no more than 30 percent from the legal fraternity. Jesus. You know what I'm always saying, if there's a big problem with the legal system, it's that all the people involved know about the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law the law, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too, too, too- too- too-up. Wea, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thus, thus, thus, thus. thususus. thususk. thusk. thusk. thususk. thusk. thususk. thusk. thususk. thusk, thususkthere's a big problem with the legal system, it's that all the people involved know about the law. Yeah, you know it's worked so well from like minus 10,000 years ago till now is a mob rule.

Mmm. It's always gone well. Mr. Popowski, who authored the motion, also urged the reintroduction of corporal punishment, arguing it was the quote, fairest form of retribution because, quote, we all feel the same pain. Hang on, step back. Who is this guy again? This guy is the president of the Carlingford branch of the New South Wales Liberal Party. So he's like a... if I recall his name correctly, is it Dr. Payne? If you all feel the same pain. Which I would argue that's also, I would argue that that's also probably not true. No, people have different pain sensitivity thresholds. There are people with chronic insensitivity to pain in which they don't feel it at all. Perhaps you're like one of the people in a movie who's had something happen to them and

then they don't feel any more pain like the guy in kick ass, also known as kick ass in the movie. Does that happen to the character kickass? Yes. He gets hit by a car and then he gets like a bunch of metal plates and shit put in him and all of his nerve endings are dead so he doesn't really feel pain anymore. Ah, is that happened in the first movie? Yes, at the start of the first movie at all. Were you possibly higher when you watched it?

No, I was a teen. I was a straight edge. Not on purpose. I just didn't really leave the house much. I always forget a previous revelation that that thi tune. tune. tune. tune. tie. tie. tie. tm. tm. tm. tm. tmue. I. I, t. I, t. I, t. I, I, I, I, I, I, I was, I was, I was thi, I was thi. I was a thi. I was the the the the the the the first the first the first the first the first the the the the the first, the the first, the first, the the first, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. te. Is te. te. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that you were a Jesus teen. I was a Jesus teen up to a point. So this is after Jesus team, but before I met my lovely friend, Mr. Beer. Oh, you know him too. Very well. Hmm.

So, Dr. Payne has proposed, 10 lashes for theft of a t-shirt, 1,000 lashes for stealing a car, but 2,000 if the vehicle is damaged, 5,000 lashes for punching a police officer, and 20,000 lashes for murder. So, it doesn't really scale up. It doesn't scale up very well, does it? Murder is 2,000 times worse than stealing a t-shirt. But it's four cop punches.

Oh my god. There is a... It's absolutely wild, isn't it? But look, in case you were thinking to yourself, this is ill-considered, how we meant to apply this punishment. I wasn't thinking that. Surely if you whip a person 20,000 times, you'll probably kill them. Don't worry. Dr. Payne has a methodology. He says that the flogging should be, quote, delivered at 10 lashes per hour every hour from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. with one hour for lunch. Okay, so 9 to 5, 8 hours, so it's 70 lashes a day. Yep. So let's say you got yourself a 20,000 lash sentence. We're talking 350 lashes a week approximately what's that Theo is that like 18,000 lashes a year? Go on rain man that ship for us. Yeah I was gonna say

why would you directly ask them? Ben's rain manning himself? Do you get like holidays? Do you get leave? What's the lash union? Yeah what's that fall under? Meatworkers? Like the flu, you know? Meatworkers. I feel like you are being tenderized at that point, that's fair. So it take you, if you were doing this as a full-time job with weekends off, it would take you like a year and a couple of months to receive your sentence for murder, unless my math is wildly wrong and there's a very large chance that it it it it it it it it it that it that it is that it is that it is that it is that it is that it is th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi the the thi their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the flu the flu the flu the flu the flu the flu the flu. the flu. the flu. the flu. the flu. the flu. the flu. the flu. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is the the the the the the the the the the the is the the is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the of months to receive your sentence for murder, unless my math is wildly wrong, and there's a very large chance that it is. Also, just in case you're wondering, the sentence would be doubled for second-time offenders. This is going to take a lot of time. So who's delivering the lashes?

Like, because this is going to take a lot of people. If you've got... For every murder that you have, that's a lot of thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th lashes? Like, because this is going to take a lot of people. If you've got, for every murder that you have, that's one person tying up the system for an entire year. Yeah, but it's like one lash and hour. Oh, sorry, 10 lashes per hour. Yeah, I guess that's starting to get. Oh, no, you're right. OK, so that's per person, but the lash, the lash, the lash, to get. Oh, no, you're right. Okay, so that's per person, but the lash-er can probably whip out

those 10 lashes in like two minutes, and then they're onto another person. So we can probably reasonably say they can do, the average lasher working full-time could do 30 murderers a year. Yeah, but does the, does the lashy have to like do they have to be in custody? Do they have to present themselves? Are we supplying someone to your workplace who stops you every like however many minutes to say you're up for another lash? Yeah, because incarceration isn't part of the deal. No, well clearly he seems to think that this would be enough of a deterrent. That's an interesting point. And you're not going to jail people for stealing a shirt.

Oh yeah. Or are you? But yeah, I don't know if they're jailing people at all. It's like, it's a logistical nightmare. Come on, let's be honest. And that's the only problem I can see with it. Although, job creation for all the people who who have to like go out to somebody's workplace, give them 10 lashes per hour

until they're sentences up. And it's only 9 to 5 so yeah I guess you would have someone on site. You're gonna think I feel like...we're not animals, we're not animals, you get an hour for lunch. I think like after a like... Obviously, we're not animals, we're not animals, you're getting an hour for lunch. I think like after a while though, you know, people will be rightly pushing for like higher wages, for the lashes, and then all the people on the other side of you say, well, you know, if you, if you pay these people more,, so we'll just have factory lines of whipping machines. Yeah, yeah, that's fine.

Well, as a friend of the show, J.R. Hennessy commented on this online, you said, um, imagine, imagine having your lunch break and eating it to the sandwich, knowing that they were going to resume whipping you afterwards, you simply wouldn't enjoy it. It's true. He's right. He's right. So continuing on, Mr. Popowski made headlines in 2016 when he bought a motion to a party conference calling for an immediate ban on all immigration, labelling migrants, criminals, bastards and jihadists. A separate motion he has authored for next week's branch meeting repeats the call for a ban on immigration and refugees which he believes is necessary because

the country is quote broke end quote and the roads are quote chockers. Jesus. Oh boy. Just for any any international listeners there, uh, Chockers is an Australian, I guess, Australianisation of the also Australian, Australian expression, chock full. Or Chocablock, as a matter of fact. That's bloody stupid, I don't like it.

Yeah, but isn't isn't Chockeblock like also just a colloquialization of Chalkful? I don't think it I've never heard the words Chockfull. I've heard Chockfell. It's all meaningless. Wow a podcast of contrasts. Right. Indeed. Many cultures. Many cultures. Uh, yeah, one thing is a short call very silly. Just so you know, folks, one meaning of chalk in the 19th century was of two things pressed so tightly against each other that they can't move. That's still a meaning of chalk. This led to the nautical term that's the direct origin of the phrase. Anyway, in an email to his branch members seen by Fairfax

Media, Mr. Popowski lamented Australia was quote going down the drain and the education system had been quote usurped by lefties, parentheses, communists. Well, thanks for clarifying. Mr Popowski also claimed that half the population was unemployed and global warming due to carbon dioxide emissions was impossible. It's good to know. He said that under the Paris Agreement on climate change, Australia was sending money to, quote,

the little Hitler's and layabouts in the islands. What? What? All right. What is happening? I'm lost. Break it down for us, Ben. How the fuck would I?

No. Who do you think he means by the little Hitler and layabouts in the island? I'm picturing just a very small Hitler. Oh, no, I think I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. F. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. What. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th very small Hitler. Oh no I think I know what this is. Okay so you know how Hitler didn't commit suicide he and the High Command escaped to Venezuela. Yep. Well Hitler had a bunch of children. They're now living in islands off the coast of South America, the Little Little Little Little Little Little. And they're all very lazy because they're living off, I was about to say stolen Nazi gold, but I mean it's just Nazi gold. So I believe that is who he is referring to.

Hmm. I'm assuming that there's a nice tinge of racism here because if we all remember There were people from which island nation was it? Was it Papua New Guinea was it? I'm trying to remember where it was that that were like petitioning Australia and other places to do something about you know climate change and pollution and stuff because of the sea level rising at such a rate in their small island nations. And that was the thing where there was the press conference with Peter Dutton and Scott Morrison

and it was Tony Abbott. It was amazing. Yeah, and Peter Dutton was in the middle of saying, making some jokes about the water lapping at the door of these island nations, making some jokes at the expense of the idea of them being swallowed whole by the rising tides. Very charming man. Yep, causing one of the other ministers to point out the boom mic directly above his head catching all the stuff he was saying. He was hot miced. So I wonder if this comment actually refers to what Mr. Popowski sees as

the lazy layabouts on islands demanding that we that we give them money and pretending that climate change is a thing. I think it's exhausting. It's so good that like we all just walk around with relatively normal brains in our heads and we like struggle with our day to day day lives like trying to make enough money to buy a house or buy groceries and all this sort of stuff. And this guy who has a brain full of the bits on the end of the chicken that gets cooked when you defrost it for too long in the microwave. Just a brain full of that in like a senior leadership position, totally oblivious and able to just wander around the world in this way. What justice is there? Well, I mean, he might know.. the the th th th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th thi th thi thi thi thi that, that, thi that that that that that that thi, that thi, thi, thi, thi that thi, that that that that that tho, th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th th th th th th th th th th. th. that, that's th. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's like, that's like thi thi thi thi that that thi that thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th just wander around the world in this way. What justice is there?

Well, I mean, he might not be there for long because we can only assume that, so I can't remember the exact phrasing, but it was emails sent to branch members seen by Fairfax, which almost a thousand percent means that someone who wants to see him get kicked out of the branch leaked the emails to the paper, hoping that th th they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th they would th they would th they would th th th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho just tho just tho just tho just tho just tho just tho just tho just tho just thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus the... the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thousand percent means that someone who wants to see him get kicked out of the branch leaked the emails to the paper hoping that they would get published and that this man would be disgraced. Yes, probably on the basis of, check this out, this guy is a raving lunatic. Yes. Yeah, so the incendiary proposals followed a failed push from certain Victorian branches

of the Liberal Party to bring back so-called gay conversion therapy, the discredited practice of trying to counsel young people out of same-sex attraction. That motion proposed for last month's state council was quickly spiked by the president of the Victorian Liberal Party following a backlash. New South Wales Liberal Party President, Philip Ruddock said he would not comment on the Carlingford motion and he to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the party to the party the party to the party to the party to the party to to to the the the the to the the to bring to the the to bring to to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring to bring the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the-c.e-c.e-c.e-c.ector thee.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e.e. the. the. President Philip Ruddock said he would not comment on the Carlingford motion and he was sure the party would quote deal with it appropriately. Yes it sounds like there's a lot of appropriate things going on. Mr. Popowski who runs a business manufacturing parts of the mining industry, big fucking

shock right there, said he could not talk to the media because of internal party rules. I'll get a hiding, he said. my my my my my my my my my the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. He was their th. He was their their th. He was th. He said th. He said. He said. Hea. Hea. He th. He th. He th. He th. He th. He's is is th. He's is their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. He was th. He was th. He was th. I was theei. He was thei. He was. He was theo. He was. He was. I was. He was th. He was th. He was their their he could not talk to the media because of internal party rules. I'll get a hiding he said. My lips are sealed. Look at him he's being cheeky isn't he? Just a larycan, just another Ozzy larycan. My God. Yeah, I mean I like I don't know what to make of this sort of stuff because while you know you do have people at what to make of this sort of stuff because while, while you do have people at the senior levels of the party saying, oh, well, yeah, they can discuss this stuff and obviously it won't get up or anything. But it kind of makes me think of like a lot of the free speech warrior kind of stuff, like, people who talk about, like, you know, we can't have any discussion. like a lot of the a lot of the free speech warrior kind of stuff like people

who who talk about like you know we can't have any any discussions that are off limits we can't have any things that are taboo to talk about and all that sort of stuff and like to whatever extent you want to consider that stuff fine I don't give a fuck have whatever conversations you like have whatever hypothetical debate club bullshit you want. But if you're like running a branch of a political party, if you're like a, you know, a political commentator on the national or world stage or whatever, my question would generally be, are you seriously trying to tell me that you don't have anything of any greater, like,

contribution to public life or the greater good that you don't have anything of any greater contribution to public life or the greater good that you could be discussing rather than, you know, should we be banning all immigration and giving people 20,000 lashes and yeah, like, I'm sure that in response to people saying, what the fuck is wrong with this guy, that the defense would be, oh, well, anyone can bring a motion and the party will debate it, and then they will deal with it. Shouldn't the fact that this stuff is being, like,

talked about it all, be a concern to these people? Shouldn't they be saying, like, why are we devoting the our time to these conversations? That's my concern about all the super free speech warrior stuff, you know? They're just saying what we're all thinking though. Just asking questions. They are just asking questions. They are just asking questions.

Shouldn't we be psychologically torturing young queer people? Just simple questions. Just simple questions. Shouldn't we be whipping someone to death over the course of a year? It's just a question. It's just so impractical, isn't it? Like I said, what are the fucking logistics, the practicalities of this? It's absolutely absurd. So, what if, what if they turned around and said, you know what, we're taking this to this the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their th, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, you, thi, thi, thi, to, to, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, just, thi, just, thi, th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, to, to, to just, to just, to, to simple, to simple, to simple, to simple, to simple, to simple, to simple, to just, to simple, to simple, to, to, thi, thi, to fucking logistics, the practicalities of this. It's absolutely absurd. All right, so, what if, what if, what if they turned around and said, you know, what,

what, we're taking this to the national conference and we want the Prime Minister to endorse it? Do you think this guy would be like, oh, fuck, wait, what? Yeah, I mean, that's it. You have to wonder whether they ever believe they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're their they're they're they're their they're they're their their they're their their they're they're they're they're their they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're t. t. t. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. they're they're they're they're todayto tell this idea to anyone else. We're like, all right, OK, so you have the guy with a whip and he's standing in the middle, and there's 20 people around him with his back face to him. If he does one whip every three seconds, he'll be able to. Well, like, yeah, it's just all this sort of stuff that really makes a lot of these kinds of things look to me like nobody involved is actually that serious about them. You know, it's the same as all the like the IPA kind of shit. I wrote a paper

that says that there should be no taxes. You're like, yeah, okay, how's that going to work then? They go, oh, the market will sort itself out. Like, if you want to get to the shops, you simply buy a subscription to Roadco. And as long as you have premium, you will get to use the route that takes you to the shops. Yeah. Absolutely ridiculous, folks. So look, let's move on for that because there's something really important that we want to talk about here today and it's a subject That is it's contentious on the show But it's near and dear to many of our hearts. That's right folks

We're talking about polyamory. Yes For some reason I thought you were going to have a sound effect there just the way that you were building There we go. That's me booing. Booing Polly. Folks, that was an article that popped up this week in horrible turd rag news. News.com. That are you.

Here's the headline. Let me hit you with it. From the age of 12, I knew the monogamy wasn't for me. Oh, I hate you so much. I hate you so much. It's physically painful. This is paired with a photo that has been supplied by the author that I can only describe as industrial-grade vagina sealant. It's just bad stuff. It makes my dick want to crawl up inside itself like an inverted hot dog. Now look, folks, you know, we know that insulting people based on their appearance,

it's not very nice thing to do. But everything that's wrong with the photos of this guy are 100% things that he has chosen to do and are not things that are intrinsic to him as a person. He has just decided to be the most visibly obnoxious person, the entire world, that I urge you to give news.com that are you those precious clicks just so you can see these fucking photos. Why has you got so many hats? Okay is this, I don't know if this is culturally insensitive to say I don't this this this this this this this this this is this is this is this is this is this is a this is a this is culturally insensitive to say. I don't care if this is a little anti-PC, but this man's hair I can only describe as being like dreadlocks made out of worry locks? Made out of what? Like, you know the, um, uh, I can't remember what the other thing they're called, the, that Orthodox Jews have their temples where they let their their their their their their their their their their the other thing they're called. The, that Orthodox Jews have their temples where they let the hair grow up. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's, he has those but, all over his head.

How easy is it to grow sideburns as a man? This is a normal thing? Well, do you guys shave off your sideburns? It depends on how patchy your beard grows really if I grow sideburns they look like fucking garbage Some people can grow them. I'm sure Andrew could grow a beautiful set of sideburns. I'm sure well I could just I could just carve out the rest of my beard and certainly the shape of gigantic sideburns if I was so inclined you have the rich full beard uh of a dad. It's connected everywhere. I'm worried because I feel like the the hair on the front of my neck is? I? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th the th th th th th th th th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. thin. thin. thin't their. their. their. their. their. their. the their. the their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their getting hairier the whole time. I took a photo. I took a photo, hold on folks. I took a photo of my ass to send to a patron recently.

I can't remember whether it was, I can't, I cannot remember whether this was as a positive or a negative thing, like whether I was trying to spite them or reward them. I cannot remember. Did we promised to send a a a the the picture a the picture a the picture a the picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a picture a to send a picture of an ass? We did. Well yeah and then I took... I thought everyone was railing for it to be mine. We still are, but where's the ass, you know? I'm sorry, Theo. We don't have a microscopic camera available because you've got a tiny ass. It's toned. It's toned. Sure it is. Um, yeah, and I took a photo of my ass and then I looked at it on my phone and I went, I can't send that to anybody. It's just, it's too hairy now.

You didn't send it to them? No, I looked at it and I just said, that's disgusting to me now. I don't drop it into the group chat. Let us make the determination determination determination determination determination determination determination determination determination determination us make the determination. It's starting to look like my brother's ass. And that's it. Oh, goodness. Okay. Well, do you want to read some of that article out? Yeah, I do. Although it's a very good, um, what it, a lead, the sub headline? Oh yeah, what the lead is. When people think of polyamory, they tend to think of lots of sex, dot, dot, dot, but the reality is often quite different.

Oh, boy. All right, uh, can I do a dumb guy voice for this? I feel like it's Oh, you're normal voice then Hey, oh Oh Got him. Oh Oh Oh, I met the pathologist again. She smiles at me the usual. I look at the pathology form. My doctor forgot to write out the STI tests. I rushed back to him and he scribbles on the page. H. I Hiv. then. then. then. then. then. then. then. then. then. then. then. then. the. the. the. the. the the voice the voice the voice the voice the voice the voice the voice. the voice. the voice. then. then, the then, the the the the the voice. the voice the the the the the then, then, then, the voice then. then. then. the voice the voice the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the voice. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. the th. the theology form. My doctor forgot to write out the

STI tests. I rush back to him and he scribbles on the page. HIV, HEP, SIP, HHSV, the holdant. Round two I say to her. This is our ritual. How many girlfriends this time she asks. She absolutely did not ask that. This exchange did not occur. Imagine someone... This man has never had a Nesty out of trick. Imagine someone at a fucking clinic saying to you, so how many people are you having sex with right now? Like the fucking girl at reception, absolutely not.

Although, I will concede that it is very likely that he has told them that he has lots of girlfriends apropos of nothing. That's true. By the way, I'm Polly. Sorry what? Oh, I meant hello. If you're wondering why I'm getting so many tests for diseases in my junk, it's because I'm Polly. If you're wondering why I come in here bi-weekly, it's, um, yeah.

How many girlfriends this time? She doesn't ask. I pretend to count on two hands, three and a half right now, I say, and she laughs. It's a cute little dance we have going on. I'll be back for the usual in about two months. 48 hours I'm collecting the results. I text my partners all good to let them know I got the all clear. I don't feel anxiety myself, but one of my partners Annie likes the peace of mind that comes with the routine rests. I've always known that monogamy wasn't for me, probably from when I was 12. Fuck off! Absolutely. Absolutely. Like, number one, imagine, imagine actually giving serious consideration to the concept of a sexual relationship

at the age of 12, let alone, gee, when I'm in a relationship I wonder if the other person expected to be monogamous, because that doesn't feel quite right to me. Fucking, absolutely not. Do not believe this in the slightest. I didn't even seek relationships until I was 15, but I knew that I wouldn't want to be trapped without a diverse support network. That sentence is so fucking like what fucking like 13 year old is like, yeah, I'm looking for serious relationships. Time to have a relationship. You don't, you just want to fucking... You don't even think about that. You're just chasing hand jobs at that point. Yes, like, yeah, at that age

I was like, imagine kissing somebody. And that was about it, you know? Yeah. It's before dinner on our regular Wednesday night and I'm sitting on the couch with Annie, cuddling and having a catch up about a week. She saw Chris this week. They've been together together together together to together to to to to to together to to to to to to together to have to have to have to to to have the the to have to have to have to have to have their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their thea. tod. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the thea. to have. to have. their their the couch with Annie, cuddling and having a catch-up about our week. She saw Chris this week. They've been together about two years. Now I've so many fucking points in as I want to dispute. So Chris is the opposite of me. Heavily introverted needs a lot of time to himself. They work well with a low pressure relationship. Too much contact and they stress each other out. They catch up about once a fortnight for dinner, cuddles, probably more. It's lovely to hear that they're going well. I don't have to ask much. I don't know the frequency with which he's mentioned cuddling.

To me, cuddling is like, it's just like, it's just like, it's just like, like you cuddle. the might cuddle this evening. It's kind of happens like a little spot of cuddling time. Yeah. If you sit near each other or fucking whatever, you'll cuddle. You don't do it as a specific activity. That's weird. That's weird. Uh, I don't have to ask much. It's none of my business, but it's always good to know that someone I care care that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone I that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone that someone I that's that's that's to that's to to to to to to to to to to to to that's to to to to that's to know that someone I care about is happy. Now, just right off the bat, like, I hear this,

and it's like, yeah, Chris is the opposite of me. He's introverted, needs a lot of time to himself, wants a low pressure relationship, doesn't want too much contact, or he gets stressed out. They catch up about once a fortnight for cuddles probably more. This sounds a lot to me like this girl has a booty call with this dude once a fortnight and that's been happening for about two years. That's the guy that's just really dicking her down.

Yeah, this dude is just like, hey, I'm actually not interested in having a relationship with you, but you can come around like once every couple of weeks and I will fuck you and then get out of my house. Like, yeah, it sounds like a great relation, a great long-term relationship she's got going with this introverted guy who doesn't like contact with her. I tell Annie that I had dinner with Diane and her parents on Monday night. Diane hasn't told her parents she's Polly yet, but she's not feeling any pressure. She's still learning how or even if she wants to label herself.

There are too many types of relationship once the door opens to non-monogamy. Diane had another boyfriend but he let her know he wasn't up for dating right now. They're friends and from time to time they might sleep together but it's not quite a relationship. She's deciding if she eventually wants to try to find another boyfriend but she said she's in no rush. So again you got a girl who's seeing a guy who doesn't want a relationship, he's not up for dating, but they still see each other every now and then to fuck. Okay, I'm sensing a pattern here.

Girls who think they're in a relationship with guys who fuck them every now and then. I'm sorry, I know I'm approaching this with absolutely the most cynical viewpoint possible. I'm waiting for someone to jump in and tell me how wrong I am? Oh look that'll come at the end when I give the you know empathetic lovely take on this after you. Okay you know. I'm excited for spirited poly defense. I'm always open about my relationships if asked but my my grandma doesn't exactly know all the logistics. Okay. Questions are always welcome. It's a great opportunity for discussion about what's normal for society. The narrative were expected to live by and what it feels like to break expectations.

Oh. I bet it feels really cool. Like I bet he just wakes up every morning and he's like, oh so many expectations. For sure. Imagine putting your face to this article. And that face. Several times. Several times. That face. That outfit. Got to show off these hats. I love waking up every morning. It's just going, oh, just shattering boundaries. God. Sometimes I get, just everything's the worst. Sometimes I do get the sense that an individual is not going to be open to my lifestyle. Ah, he called it a lifestyle, Ben, remember that. I don't drink.

I don't drink, so my dates tend to look something like going out for cake. I was walking to cake with a new prospect. Don't call women you want to have a relationship a prospect. They do though. These people. Those people. New people. Okay, well, let's not go that far. New people. Is it fair to call him a prospector? Is that what he is? Oh my God. Truly terrible. Well he is using a divining rod. Ah, no. I was walking to cake with a new prospect Francis when she asked, so what did you get up to today? Truthfully I told her that I visited my friend and mentioned that he wanted a chat because he and his wife had recently decided to open up their relationship. She stopped dead in the street, her hand covering

her mouth. Oh, I could never do that, she squealed. She's not as open-minded as you, bro, both cake and company were delicious, but brief. Polyamory is not for everyone. Don't call company delicious? Unless he's meaning to suggest that he fucked this lady on one date and then ditched her. And that would beller and I. I have been seeing each other on and off for about three years. She once told me she felt Polyamory was for her since she was six. Fuck six. Oh, she did not. Oh my god. Absolutely did not.

Like at six, you're still undecided whether or not balloons are for you. Like, hmm. That is just not true. Yeah, just the idea that anybody had said. Yeah, I was six and thinking about just rooting multiple people that was just on my mind as a six year old Because yeah, well, normal imagine thinking to yourself. Oh, yeah, I would like to be in some form of a relationship at some point, but it definitely couldn't just be with one person. I have too much love to give just a six year old Scratching their chin about relationship dynamics. Hmm. So fucking full of shit.

And this is my, all right, so this is my concern about this stuff, where, or at least what makes me skeptical or critical of it, and this is what I was talking to you guys about the other night, where what makes me uncomfortable in every piece of extremely vocal pro-Poli stuff is that people always want the scene to use the same language to frame their conception of Polly that people use to talk about coming to terms with like gender identity and sexual identity at a young age. So when you're talking about people either having, you know, realizations about their trans identity at a really young age and thinking, oh

well everybody tells me I'm a boy but I'm quite sure I'm a girl, or everybody tells me I'm supposed to like girls but I'm only interested in boys. And I knew from a really young age that I was gay. And people seem to be really desperate to cast this in the same light light of of of of of of of of of to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thiii. to thi. to thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the their their, their, their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, tre, tre, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, true, their, their, their, their, their, desperate to cast this in the same light of a sexual identity or orientation. When, like, the reality to me is that these are just choices about how you conduct relationships. And people seem to be really desperate to cast it in this light of A, it's something I was destined to be from this extremely young age, and like we're all saying, fuck off.

Fucking nobody was thinking this at six years old. You are retconning the shit out of this to try and make it sound like anybody who's, you know, critical of your quote-unquote lifestyle or whatever, is being like bigoted or discriminatory in the same way that they would be if they said, oh no one knows at 6 that they're gay or no one knows at 10 of they're gay. And it's that whole angle on this stuff that makes me very uncomfortable with how any of these articles are framed. It's definitely, it's closer to a skill than it is an attribute, right? Like it's not an intrinsic quality.

Like people would definitely be more inclined, one way or the other, based on their personality, whatever. But this is like a, I think you could take a monogamous person, and I don't know, through building up trust and communication and blah, and all that could eventually get to a point where they'd be comfortable dating other people. You can't learn to be gay. I reckon you could learn to be Polly and I will be instructing everyone. Well yeah and that's I feel the same. I look at it and I go the like everything that they're describing is simply choices you have made about the kinds of relationships you would like to have.

Everything they're talking about is just some variation on the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their the kinds of relationships you would like to have. Everything they're talking about is just some variation on open relationships. And that's fine, like fucking do that if you want to. That is absolutely fine. Like, that is in no way, shape or form my criticism. Like, if you have, you know, someone that you date and sleep with and you got a side piece and somebody else that you see every now and then and you want to be open with them all about it and try and keep them all going, fucking go for it. But the idea of trying to cast it as I knew from birth that I simply could not sleep with

just one person. Because like, yeah, like what happens if you're only able to find one person at any tie thi thi thin thin thin thin thin to thin to thin thin the to thin thin the thi. thi. thi. their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to be thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to to th. that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you th and you th and you th. And you th. And you that you th. And you th. And you th. And you th. th. And you th. th. And you th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the the the the the the to the the to to the the the to the the the the the the the the happens if you're only able to find one person at any given time who wants to be in a relationship with you? Do you magically stop being poly? Are you only officially poly if you're sleeping with more than one person at a time? I think they do define it. A lot of them seem to define it as like a sexuality, as in like the same way that you know you still bisexual if you're dating a woman or whatever they're you know they'd still be poly if they're dating one person just they're you know currently not except except that

I would also argue that most like most by people that I know who are in a I guess an an outwardly cis relationship, if that's the right way to describe it, are also reasonable about the fact that, like, they understand that if someone were to look at them and go, oh, a man married to a woman having a heteronormative relationship or you know dating or whatever, I'm just wildly assuming that these people are straightened in a relationship. That's ridiculous. I don't assume that any single person is straight at all. Every single person is bisexual until they explicitly tell me otherwise. Yeah, that's fine. But like, you know, is like is it a thing that, you know, would you get really mad and scream at someone about biretia? Yeah, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I I, I, I thi, I I, I thi, I I, I, I, I, I, I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, I, I, I, I, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th thing that, you know, like, would you get really mad and scream at someone about buy a racer?

If they went, oh, you're dating this lady over here and you live together long term? I'm just guessing that's your deal. Which be like, how dare you not assume that I'm Polly? How dare you Polly erase me? I mean, this is a whole other thing, but there was that thread that was going around of a Polly person who was annoyed that... Stardieu Valley? Yeah, Stard you Valley if you dating all ten people? Or is it?

If you date, if you date all of the male and female bachelors at the same time. They all have a meeting where they cross at you for not telling? Yep, that they will all get together and say, how could you not tell us that you were dating all of us at once? And they were very mad because they were like, up until this point I was.. of both people and the game allows you to just you know pretend that whatever you're doing in the game you can impose your own narrative on it. Well it's sort of it's funny about we were talking about like lifestyle before because a line from that is like a line that you

can choose a dialogue is like oh yeah it's a lifestyle choice and that made this person extremely unhappy about this. but yeah like it's the whole things th the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the you you you you you you you you you you you you're you you're you you're you you're you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you th you th you th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that that that thi thi thi thin that that that thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th five years. And this made this person extremely unhappy about this. But yeah, like, it's the whole thing's a big, it's a big mystery to me. You guys might have figured that out by now. Yeah. It looks like we'd probably run out of time with the rest of the article. So I just want to note that we got, or at least I got when I was tweeeeat it a screenshot of this thing and several people tell me that they know this specific person. Me too. Several

people messed me saying they either went to primary school or university with him. Yeah so two people told me that he was a bit of a creep and then another two people one of them told me that he used to bring his llama to school, which sounded quite insane in isolation, but then another person told me that one time they got a lift from a party with him or something, and then he like apologized for the smell saying, sorry, I've had goats in the car. I look, and there's, this, this brings to mind another thread I wound up thinking to myself I wonder if Polly is basically like the sexuality equivalent of the stereotype about vegans you know. People only being obnoxious on the basis of whether or not they have to make sure that you know about it.

And everything else that I've heard about this guy and everything that he talks about here makes me go, oh, you seem like the sort of person who is constantly seeking to parade external factors as a substitute for a personality. You seem like the sort of person who went through a phase where you smoked a pipe. Oh, absolutely. We have seen the photos that you supplied for this piece, a different fedora in everyone. There was a bowler hat, a fedora, possibly a chill. Way too many configurations of facial hair.

These are all things that scream out to me. Maybe if I try on these different affectations, they will give the they will give the illusion of me being an interesting person. I would also like to note that there was a minority report and that one guy who follows me did tweet up me being like, oh come on man, I know that dude, he's actually quite lovely. So, look, we don't know the whole story, but the way he's decided to present himself in this article, which he a thousand percent would have pitched

because he's not a celebrity, so I can't imagine anyone would approach him about it, is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Yep, yep. Yeah, I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I would I I I would I would I would I would I would I would that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. that that that that. that that that that that that that that th. is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Yep, yep. Um, yeah, I would also note just in this article as well that when he's, when he's talking about one of his other people, Bella, one of his other partners, they're out to dinner, she starts telling me about Eric, a German guy should have been dating for about a year.

Whenever I meet him we end up talking about economics for hours. Oh, fuck I saw that. Jesus. He's been traveling for work and is about to leave again for a few months. Bella says she's finding it harping a long distance. We order our food and start talking about what's gone wrong with Eric. At first, I think Bella's feeling fed up because he's heading away again, but something different is troubling her. She tella's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. too. tooe. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe. That was fine, she tells me. She's a nice girl. Bella's met her several times and the two of them even face time from time to time. But Eric and his ex went to a restaurant called Pastuzzo. That Bella's been telling

Eric she wants to try for months. She had some twingeses of something. Something jealousy. This was a special thing between Bella and Eric. the b b b b b eyes. She says, and he went and took someone else there resentfully. She says she's feeling bad about resenting the situation, but also that she can't help how she feels. She tells me she knows it's okay to feel upset about it. I nod. She's... She says she's needing to share something special with Eric and him taking someone else to the restaurant hasn't fulfilled her need for a special connection. Sometimes she describes these particular frustrations as her quote monogamy hangover.

I like that. It's just like I said everything about all of these things as they are described to me, just go, just make me go. It's all just people who've gone, hey, I, I have several I have several. I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have, I have a the the, I have a their, I have a their, Ithey are described to me, just go, just make me go. It's it's all just people who've gone, hey, I have several different things going on at any one time and I'm trying to maintain them concurrently and having completely normal feelings about them like. Yeah, look, that's not a monogamy hangover that's someone was being kind of a bit inconsiderate. That's not fucking monogamy hangover at all that's being like oh hey maybe don't fucking do that. Yeah but it's also a reflection of the concept that like relationships are intimate and personal like and not just automatically completely interchangeable. I guess yeah like I said there's nothing in any of the

things that have been described, apart from, like I said, the other ones which are all like guys who are basically like, just fuck off until I call you to come around for sex, which doesn't quite sound like, like an open-minded, very communicative poly relationship. But yeah, like all of the things described, there is nothing special or unique about any of them, the only thing, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the, like, the other, like, like, like, the other, like, like, the other, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like all of the things described, there is nothing special or unique about any of them. The only thing that imparts any sense of like what it means to be Polly is always this made up shit of people saying, when I was too, I knew that I couldn't possibly conduct a long-term meaningful monogamous relationship with only a single person.

And no you didn't. No you didn't. Folks look at the pictures of them, outrageous. Anyway, what a terrible, terrible article. Just, and he wrote it himself. Come on, man. Oh, I hate it. I'm very, very mad about it. Very angry. Can you hear my anger? I can't. I'm a very viciously angry person. Folks, that just about does it for us. We're running a little bit over even. So if you would like extra episodes of this show on which we are talking, you can find us over on Patreon.com.sbunta Vista. And for the price of one expensive Australian coffee per month, you could have an extra episode every week.

So cheap. Yeah, I think it's cheap. And I think we have the best fun on these ones. It's true. And some people choose to pay even more and become wives of the show, like a beautiful Simon Patrick Cantwell, a new wife of the show. Hensome people do that. Hello, Connor Stokes, wife of the show. We're just shouting people out now. Yeah. But that's mainly because we didn't leave enough time to do their letters. So, sorry, we'll do them on the old bonus episode.

Have we got a crime pass? Oh, your crime pass is to violently wedgie the polyman. Just the one polyman. If you see him around, give him a little. Just that guy. Steal his hat. Yeah, actually, I might maybe drop it from assault to minor the the Definitely if you see the Polly Man, take his fucking hat, tear it in half and then give him back the hat. Nice.

And then you say, why do you have a relationship with these two hats? Ha ha ha! Of course, if you feel like leaving us a review on iTunes, 5 stars only. 5 stars, am I right, folks? Yeah. I mean, I mean, yeah. It is laughable. The crowd loves it.

They're cheering. They're all happy about it. And is that, is that it? Oh, merchandise, we've got merchandise. Puttavista.com slash, merchandise. Yeah, wear our sick merch. Yeah, you look very handsome in it. You look dashing.

Just type in, come down Lucy. They would. I think any man in a Buntavista shirt would be very sexy to me. He can get it. I just want everyone to know that we're not making tha Lucy this. If anything, we're actively trying to discourage her. We're trying to stop her. Oh dear. All right folks, I think we'll leave it there. Love and kisses to each and every one of you. Smooch, Polly kisses. Polly kisses. They sound like phe-o. Do some kisses. Mmm. Polly kisses for everybody. They sound like pheo.

Theo. Do some kisses. Kiss. Absolutely not doing poly kisses. Oh, just a couple. No. I'll be turning off my mic in five minutes and doing mono kisses. I've got it. Your wife has mono.

Is that contagious? Is that contagious? Yes, very much. Kissing disease? It's literally called the kissing disease. Is it? Yes. Bye folks. By folks. Theo's gonna go learn about kissing. Bye. That is too. I'm fine. Hi Theo.