Boonta Vista - UNLOCKED BONUS EPISODE: Are Dipshits Allowed At The Fuckhead Store

Episode Date: February 12, 2023

A tale of three Dennis the Menace statues, the loneliest hockey player in the Southern Professional Hockey League, the redditors who dream of a world without dogs, and just how much beer can an escaped bear bear. *** It's Freemium Freebruary! Bonus episodes are free for this, the shortest month of the year, so that you will hopefully grow dependent on them. They go back behind the paywall in march so enjoy it while it lasts!

Hello and welcome. This is a bonus episode. I am Ben and I am here in the Berkdesgarden Alps high above Ober Salzburg at the very summit of the Kelschstein on, oh Kelshten, probably. On April 20th, 1939. Lying wait, as inside the Eagle's Nest, the German High Command is celebrating the 50th birthday of the mad dictator of the Third Reich, Adolf Hitler. Having stealthily summoned the peak under cover of night as part of an international team of highly trained commandos, we are mere seconds away from undertaking Operation Eagle Hammer. If successful, this mission will see the death of both the Nazi top brass and the figurehead

of the Nazi Empire himself, delivering a devastating blow to the German war effort. With me is American Green Beret Commando Brandt Pit Viper Montana, having just left from his hiding spot to sail the wall beneath the high, small window of the second bathroom of the Eagle's Nest, but having only found out when his torso was through the window that it was smaller than they had planned for, causing his side arm to get caught on the edge of the window sill and pull his pads down, leaving him dangling from the window with no gun and bare cheeks to the toyle it's it's to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to to to the to the to to to to the the to the the to to to to to the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to their their to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the. the. the the the the the toe to to to to tooooooo toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe toe the the the toe the Oora! Who are Marines? You are Tango.

Stay frusty in there. Yeah, I was so glad to be part of an elite unit. I've been trading all my life for this. Yeah. Now I actually, I have been training for this exact moment and this exact scenario. So while you think I've lost my side arm, I've actually got another sidearm strapped to the inside of my pants where I would... Now I see there's a small issue there.

Oh, yeah. Did you have a third one sort of kept on you about your torso at all, maybe? Yeah. Could never have too many pistols when you're on the way to kill the mad dictator Hitler. Yeah. You could never have too many pistols when you're on the way to kill the mad dictator Hitler. Yeah, maybe you should diversify your holster situation maybe. I think there's still a fair chance that like, your feet are definitely caught on that window but if you cut off your legs you might be able to sort of crawl bare assed through the eagle's nest. All right, I'm going to start gnawing.

No God though, knife was also on the back. Knife was also on my belt loop. Also with me is French demolitions expert Gerard Le Renard Ptard who having silently drilled, who having silently drilled through the roof above the octagon room of the eagle's nest in which Hitler and the High Commander assembled, he's pulled the pin from a hand grenade and is preparing to put an explosive end to World War II when he's hit in the face by an alpine chuff causing him to drop the grenade, unable to unhook the lever on the fumbled grenade from his belt loop he is killed

instantly when it explodes. It's Andrew. Hi Andrew. Oh, hi! th Andrew. th. th. th. th. th, to th, th, th, to th, th, th, th, th, to th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thrown, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. throwneeeean throwneeeeeean, thrownee. throwne. throwne. throwne. throwne, is thrown really looking forward to stealing some of Adolf Hitler's funfeti cake. I was actually just looking at a photo of, um, it was on V-Day of some Allied soldiers up at the Eagles Nest drinking champagne on his outdoor furniture. She think must have been a lovely day for those guys. So, shame me had such generous belt loops on outdoor furniture. I think it must have been a lovely day for those guys. So, it's a shame you had such generous belt loops on those pants. Because you know, maybe the grenade wouldn't have got caught on those, you might have been okay. A lot of pants related issues at this point. Yeah. Also with me is the she demon of Konyxburg, Ilsa Blount, a former SS administrative secretary who defected to the allies after poisoning her entire branching, tooom....., the b. the b. the building their their their their their their their tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. tooom. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's t. It's t. It's t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t SS administrative secretary who defected to the Allies after poisoning

her entire branch and burning the building to the ground. Having gotten both the date and the location wrong, she has arrived on April 22nd at the neighboring peak of Untasburg. It's Lucy. Hi Lucy. Hello. Hey. I have ADHD.

They should have sent someone else. Adult self-diagosed ADHD and uh... Adult diagnosed the Hitler disorder. They should have at least put another commander on the team that double-checked that all your plans. I should have worn my, my chore bracelets today. Yeah, you could have put one on the other wrist to signify, make sure you kill Hitler on April 20th, 1939.

I should have worn your gun bracelets on your wrist, you know, had one up and down. By the way, if you look through those binoculars of yours, hang on, are you early or late? Late? Two days late. Yeah, well, okay. I'm still kicking around. You've seen it. They're an arse over there. My new little arse. Getting frost frost, are you you you you you you th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th, are th th th, are th, are th th thi, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, you th, you th, and you th, and you th, th, th, and you th, th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty, and thirty, and thirty still kicking around. You've seen there. Been to see my new little arse. Getting frost by it in the arse. I can't be sure that that's not Hitler. So I might just send over like a, just a little shot in the bottom. Yeah, pop around in there, see what happens.

You're either putting one of your fellow man knows out of his misery with a kudagra ass shot or you're killing the man dictator of the third rake. So either way it's probably a good thought. It's a variety in this job that's why I enjoy it so much you know. No two days that are the same. That's so true. And it's just good to be out of the house, you know. So that true. that, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working in th. thi. thi, working, working, working in th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working, working. th. th. thi. that, working, working, working in, working in a that, working in a that, working in, working in, working in a that, working in a that, working in that, working in that, working in that, working in the the that fresh alpine air. Oh, that Hitler. He was a menace. That Hitler, an absolute menace. Of course, history has other notorious menaces and we're going to check in on one of them right now.

I'm Crime Watch. Please put down your weapon. You're a direct violation to the phone 13, section 9. You now have five seconds to try. Help me! Hey! Help me! H- Now, I know you're worried, HENDRICKS HENTIGH! SHH! HALLUS

BANGER HENT NOW HENT HENDENT THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE THE Now, I know you were worried collectively. I know that our audience has been stressed about this and they've been asking why we haven't been covering it and when we're going to cover it. And the answer is, now, you can all breathe a sigh of relief. This comes from the Associated Press, Monterey's missing Dennis the Menace statue found in Lake. Great news. Ladies and gentlemen we got him. Apprehended Dennis

the Menace has been compromised to a permanent end. This is this is just the moment where we pull down the statue. We destroy we destroy the kind of physical and psychic form of Dennis the Menace that is worshipped. Yeah. The real Dennis. The Menace is actually being strapped to a chair deep in the Himalayas for the last 10,000 years. His body decayed but his mind sending out a mischief signal across the galaxy.

It's just a little, uh, be reading a bit of 40K more. Wanting to slot that in. Oh boy. Dennis the Menace has been found. A statue of the comic strip character that was stolen from a park in Monterey, California last summer was found submerged in a nearby lake. Quote, today is a happy day, Moderay County Sheriff Tina Nieto said Wednesday at a press conference where the statue was wheeled in on a handcart.

Oh man. A lot going on that. That is a difficult phrase to use without comical connotations. Wield in on a handkerchief. Other than like Hannibal Lecda. Yeah, I'm imagining him being wheeled in like Hannibal Lector on a or I guess Billy Connolly's character in Boondock Saints. I I think I think it really speaks to the public reputation of the police when you're out there to crying this one is a big win.

Yeah, you know. Yeah. Finally Facebook page. Yeah we cracked the mystery. We did it guys. You know that shitty annoying kid from the comic books? Hey, by the way, there's too many rape kits in this rape kit cupboard I can't close the door. Anyway, we've got a lot on. Really busy. We're really busy. We didn't get to that. We had a team of 65 divers in the lake trying to find this Dennis the Menace statue. Man, we had a real mystery the other day out front of our house. So we're next to school and all the teachers park out in front of the, like on our street. And one of the car's windows was just smashed all of a sudden. Looked in there, couldn't see anything.

Um, nothing good for you to steal. Nothing good for me to steal. Well, no, no, there was actually. So all of the stuff was still there. So it wasn't a robbery. And my theory is that the window the window, the window, the window, the window, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, the, they, the, they, they, they, to, they, they, they, they., they. they. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi my theory is that the window just smash like you know how sometimes they're they're just like forged wrong yeah or they get heated up to yeah it was a super hot day it was like 35 degrees anyway one of our neighbors came across us be like oh you know make sure we'll call the police

and you know they might they might even want to get in here and fingerprint you know around the place and stuff just like oh oh oh tho-oh tho-you th th th th th th they th th th th we th we th we th we th we th we th we th we th we th we the the the the the the the they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they're they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they they they the the the the the tho the tho tho the tho tho tho-s tho-s tho-s tho-s tho-s tho-s they-s theee want to get in here and fingerprint, you know, around the place and stuff. I'm just like, oh, oh, honey, that's not what the police do. They don't do that. That's not real. It's not really their wheelhouse, I would say. That's not, that's not like a passion project for them. No. At this point in time. They've only got so much, only so many hours in the day, the day, the day, their, their, their, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their, thi, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. And, thi. And, that, that, that, that, that, that, tho. And, thoo. And, tho. And, tho. And, tho. And, that, their, their, their, the. At this point in time. They've only got so much, only so many hours in the day, why spend it doing things you're not really interested in? Yeah. That's right. Yeah, I remember when someone did a smash and grab on the GPS in my 2007 Mitsubishi Lancer. Wonderful car, miss it daily. Yeah, that's right, people under 30. You used to have to buy a GPS to get a GPS to get owned. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. to th. th. to to the the th. th. S. S. S. S. S. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. S. I. S. S. S. S. I. S. S. S. I. S. I. S. S. S. S. I. S. S get around. No, I never did that. I went straight from printing out, from Refodex to printing out Google Maps to phones. Yeah.

Never go for the GPS. Because I had a, because I had an iPad, an iPod, one of the, one of the Wi-Fi, one of the, one of the Wi-Fi ones before they, um, I did the thing, I got thapapapapap, one one one one one one one one one the the the the the wo, the wo, the wi, the wi, the wi, the wi, the wi, the wi, the wi, the, the, the, the, the, to, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, to, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, w.. to, w. to, w. to, w. to, w. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, I got one of those little optist dongals that I could like take around and get the maps on my iPod. Anyway, so he did a smash and grab my GPS and called the cops because you need to for the insurance and they're like, yeah, some kid went on a smash and grab and we called him this morning and like, oh cool. So do I like getting into my stuff back or anything like, no. Bye. Bye. Yeah, see ya. That's the end of that one. Firmware update. Can you tell me how to do that?

Um, the Sheriff's dive team found the three foot tall statue. Pothetic. That is pathetic. Did they have to make him live size size? I've seen statues so much bigger than that. Yeah. I guess he's, he's quite he's quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite quite he's quite quite he's quite quite quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite he's quite th. th. th. th. th. th. thi's thi. thi's thi. thi. thi. thi. th. they. they. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their th. their th. He's thi's thi's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's the. He's t. He's today. He's th. He's the. the. He's the. He's a statue so much bigger than that. Yeah, I guess he's quite small, so I guess that's probably... Because he's a child, I guess, child. Yeah, children are... So it's a life-sized child, it's a one-to-one statue of him. A six-foot tall statue would be an enormous

enormous Dennis. Yeah, I guess so, but I would, yeah, I would note that he is not real. You know, right. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, the the the the the the the the he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's enormous, he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's, he's, he's enormous, he's enormous, he's enormous, he's enormous, he's enormous, he's enormous, he's enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, enormous, but I would, yeah I would note that he is not real. You know? Right, so you're saying in your head canon Dennis the Menace is much bigger. I'm saying in my head canon, Dennis the Menace is a comic strip. He would towar over you. Oh, so he's like an idea. Yeah, like Garfield. I guarantee you, no matter how you rendered Garfield in three dimensions, everyone would be like, oh, that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho, tho, th. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th th th the th the the the thean. the thean. th thi thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th matter how you rendered Garfield in three dimensions, everyone would be like, oh, that's wrong.

It's wrong. Everyone has their own personal Garfield. Yeah, well, I'm saying it's a lot. I just see Garfield in three dimensions as the, uh, as the, the fatal farm, whatever rendering of, they're doing it at any particular time. I think they nailed it. picture Garfield as the one from like the first strip or he just looks like shit yeah yeah fucked up old Garfield yeah oh god that guys had a rough life yeah what's for that pipe smoking he's been doing I like a I like really old peanuts really old peanuts looks very different I like them they give me a

tummy aged I'm just if I find an extremely old peanuts on I'll eat it I'll eat it and wum and them eat it. And welcome to Freemium Free Brewery, by the way. I hope you're enjoying... You could be pangs for this. That's right. The Sheriff's Dive Team found the three-foot-tall statue at Roberts Lake after Monterey City Police received an anonymous tip about its location. Yes, I put the statue in the lake.

What's your name? I'm not telling. Click. I wish I knew the name of his neighbors. Mr. Wilson? Mr. Wilson? I would give my name as Mr. Wilson. Yeah, that would be pretty funny. Yeah, Mr. Wilson a gun. Little fucker's sleeping with the fishes now. He should have shot that kid. He should have shot him on his front lawn.

No jury would convict you. Both barrels. I think that would be... He kept messing up my garden. So I killed him. Yeah, some of the shit that Dennis the Manus pulled you wouldn't get away with these days. Yeah, wouldn't fly.

I think it would be very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very the the th be very the th be very to throw the Dennis the Menace statue in the lake and then immediately call the police and say, the Dennis the Menace statue is in the lake and then when they recover him and put him back, just do it again. Do it again. Oh, nice. Call them up. Hey, he's back in the lake. Just over and over.

Surely they'd of Rockhampton. Yep. Just central Queensland things. Dennis the Menace has a big but oddly troubled local connection. His creator, Hank Ketchum, was a long-time resident of Monterey County and died there in 2001. The park's original statue was stolen in 2006 and hasn't been found. Have you checked the lake? Its replacement was stolen in August 2022 by someone who cut through its foot

to remove it. Incredible. See I think this is just everyone should have just accepted this as an eventuality right? Because who's going to be fans of Dennis the Menace? Menaces. Menaces. Mischiefmakers. Scamps. Nader Wells.

Etc. That's right. Dennis is menace coded. Yeah. In the years between the two thefts, a Dennis the Menace statue was found in a Florida scrap yard and sent to Monterey where officials determined it was not the right one, okay SBW reported. Yeah, they DNA tested it. I don't know.

You're the wrong Dennis the Menace statue from the Children's Hospital. It had actually been taken from a Florida Children's Hospital. It had actually been ace statue from the children's hospital. He's a bad influence. Yeah, I don't want them seeing this. The hospital allowed Monterey to keep that statue, which is now in front of a city parks building. That's so great.

The hospital's just like, no, you need it more than we to. Yeah, you keep it. These kids can entertain themselves. Nietzsche said, it's believed the statue found in the lake is the most recently stolen Dennis the Menace statue because its foot is damaged. You guys have too many statues of Dennis the Menace. Yeah, I feel like I'm trying to read the plot of Primer being described. We have Dennis the Menace Statue A, which actually arrived slightly after Dennis the menace statue B. But the the the the the the lake is is is is is is the the the the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is is the lake is is is the lake is is the lake is is the lake is is is is the lake is the lake is is is the lake is is the lake is is is the lake is is is the lake is is is is is the lake is is the lake is the lake is is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake is the lake. I. I. I the lake. I the lake. I the lake. I the lake is. I the lake. I the lake is. I the lake is. I the lake is. I the lake is the lake is the lake is. I Dennis the Menace Statue A, which actually arrived slightly after Dennis

the Menace Statue B, but we have both, but one of them is damaged somehow. But they don't have the old one. They've only got a fake one from Florida Children's Hospital. The first one's still missing. It'd be very funny of the community rally to say, no, we want the proper one. Yeah, this isn't enough. Get back to work. Scal of the earth the earth the earth the earth the earth. There the earth. There the earth. There the earth. There the earth. There the earth. There the earth. There the earth. There the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. the. the the. the. the the the the. the the the. the thee. the the. the. the. the. the, this isn't enough. Get back to work. Scale of the earth. There were three statues in total in this story? Yeah. So there's the one that was stolen, they never recovered. There's the one that was the children's hospital one, and then there was the one that

was stolen that they have just recovered. Yeah, and you can the the the one the one the one the one th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th, and you th was tho, and you tho, and tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th was th was th was th was th was th was th was th was th was th was th was th. th. There were were were were were were were were were were were th. th. th. th. th. tho tho tho tho tho tho, tho, tho, tho, thoo, thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo th. th. tell which one we're talking about at any point in time by their hair colour. That's right. Quote, we're giving you back Dennis. Nietzscheld Monterey Assistant Chief Mike Bruno. Don't let him get stolen again. I cannot guarantee that, I would be saying. Do your goddamn job. What, who said that?

Who said that? Who said that? Nietto the county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county county? Who's giving back Dennis? Yeah, who said that? Uh, Nieto, the county sheriff. County Sheriff Tina Nieto. So, and then he said, don't let it get, she said, oh. We are returning Dennis the menace to you. Don't let him get stolen and get some of the job.

Well, no, she's saying that to Moderate Chief. Oh, she's. Assistant Chief Mike Bruno. She's casting some shade. Yeah, Mike Bruno. Yeah, she's going in. Yeah, get him. Get his ass. Yeah, drag him. Why is this Mike Bruno's job? Why is he the custodian of the Dennis the Menace statue? I don't know. She seems mad. She seems angry at Mike. She thinks it's his fault that it got stolen. I don't think it's great leadership? to stand it as a press competition? to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the assistant? the assistant? the assistant? the assistant? the assistant? the assistant the assistant the assistant the ass. the ass. the ass. the assistant the assistant the assistant the assistant the ass. the ass. the the the the the the the the th. the th. the th. the the th. th. the the th. th. the the th. th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the assistant the assistant the assistant their their assistant their assistant chief their assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's assistant chief's their thinks it's his fault that it got stolen. I don't think it's great leadership to stand it as a press conference and turn to your deputy and say, the buck stops with you.

Yeah. Quit letting the buck get stolen. Well, good luck out there, Mike. Yeah. Dennis the menace, the Buck. Yeah, the Buck should stop where it is now. Yeah, okay. Yeah. I hate Dennis the Menace.

Yeah, he's a little cunt. I can't even name a specific antique of his. Beat him with hammers. I just know that his vibe was wrong. It's always doing shit. Come down. We got a bunch of books from, like parents and stuff handed down, one of them is a Dennis the Menace book and it's like Dennis the Menace goes to the zoo and all he does is just like run off ahead of his dad.

Hey, you little fucker. Yeah. Real funny when it's not your child, you know, or he's not in your front yard. Yeah. And you're not allowed to beat kids anymore. You're not allowed to do that because of political correctness. Yeah. We have a, we have a breaking pipe. She's sweet and red, she's swinging lead. Gonna hit you in the hand, yeah. On this week's With the Lead Pipe, the segment where we discuss things we'd like to bash with the lead pipe.

Dennis the menace. Yeah, key change. You can get it brother. Uh, and remember because he's a car tune-in' the pipe the segment where we discuss things we'd like to bash with lead pipe. Dennis the Menace. Yeah, key change. You can get it brother. And remember because he's a cartoon you are allowed to kill him you can get hit with a pipe. There was a live action. Just to be clear. Dennis the menace also. Yeah you you cannot go to jail for killing Dennis the menace the menace the menace. Yes. You can't the they. You can can't. You can't. You can't. You can't the the they. You can't. You can't they. You can't they. You can't they. You can't they. You can't they. You can't they. You can't they. You can't their. You can't their. You can't go. You can't. You can't their. You can't their. You can't go. You can't. You can't. You can't. You can't. You can't. You can. You can. You can. You can. You can. You can. You can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can can. You. You. You. You. You. You can can can can can can can. You can. You can. You can. You can't. You can't. You can't. You can't. You can't the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the but killing dead is the menace, no. They will never send you to prison. Uh, anyway, they got their statue back. All is right with the world until Monterey assistant chief Mike Bruno fucks it up again. So we might say that really there was not much to report. It's the nothing to report report report. It's the nothing to report, report, report, report, report, report,

the nothing to report, report, report, report, report, the nothing to report, report, report. What happened? Nothing, shh. So you should mind your fucking business. It's the nothing to report, report, report, report, nothing to report, report, report, report, nothing to report report. Folks, it's time for the nothing to report report. From Sky News, Hockey team fails to show up to game so fans skate on ice with visiting players. That's nice. It's nice. That sounds fun.

No harm no foul, you know? What happens when a minor league hockey team goes AWOL for a home game? The home game? Yeah, it was a home game. Oh, sorry, but that rocks. That's like a power move, just like, not even coming. We're not doing it. Yeah, you wait for us.

It's my day off. Oh, you guys still wanted to play? Eh, not really for me. Vermilion County Bobcats failed to show up for a match against Quart City Storm on Sunday, leaving everyone bemused. Do you think that was the prevailing attitude? I might have gone probably... They might have gone slightly beyond bemused, I think, maybe. Some of them. Some of them might have been like, hey, what the fuck?

Yeah. Someone might say, hey, what's going on? Another person might say. There's only one team here. Yeah. Oh, that the rink. The national anthem played as usual and officials were primed with the puck. Sounds uncomfortable, but after a two minute delay and another five minute wait, the game was declared a forfeit.

Familian County's coach was nowhere to be seen that there was no athletic trainer and only one player was prepared to take the ice. One guy rocked up. Oh, that rules. That rules very hard. I love it. Videos emerged on social media showing the quad standing on one half of the ring compared to the empty bench, net and ice on the other side with fans saying how embarrassing the situation was.

Who's it embarrassing for? The team that's not bad. The one guy, probably. I think it's embarrassing for the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans the fans. the fans. the fans. the fans. the the the the fans. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th is very th. th is very th is very th. th is very th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's very th. It's very th. It's very th. It's the. It's the. It's very the the the the the the the the thea thea thea thea the the the the the the the the the the the the team that's there? The team that's not the guy, probably. I think the fans. I think it's embarrassing for the fans. I'd feel bad. They should feel bad. Idiots, where's your team? Do you reckon the one guy was like, smug?

Like he was like the one kid that remembers to do the homework. Yeah. And he was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, I I I I I the, I the, I the, they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. tho. tho. tho. tho, tho, thi. the the tho, tho, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the fans, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's. the the the the the the the the the the the than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. was playing. Why don't I just play for the whole team? They let him brawl on the ice. Him versus the entire other team. The Vermillion County Bobcat is singular. To give the fans something to remember before the onto the ice for some entertainment. Their tickets cost between $7 to $13 and didn't go to waste. Quad City President Brian Rothenberger said, that is really what minor pro sports is all about.

Not turning up. It's very funny. They were excited to be able tourning up. Not turning up. It's very funny. They were excited to be able to do it. I think it meant a lot to the fans that were there, especially some of the younger kids looking forward to that skate. Well I think they were looking forward to a game of ice hockey. You can go ice skating at any time.

It's not on a schedule. They'll let you in. Might cost less than the ticket for the game. The Bobcats had already been skating on thin eyes. Nice. Nice. I get it. Before this incident having lost 77 out of 86 games in its two-year existence. Oh, okay. All right. I wouldn't show up. I see what's going on here. Ah, I see. I see.

It's fine. A series of loser teams my entire life. Uh, the team revealed on Thursday that they, quote, ceased operations. Oh, they're done. Yeah, well, like they threw in the towel. They're like, we just, we suck, so too much. We try. Fuck it, fucking forget it. It's too hard.

The ice is really slippery. The other guys are so big. It seems silly that we wouldn't do this on normal ground. Ellen Tully, owner of the Vermilion County Bobcats, said, It is a sad day for hockey fans in Danville, but I want to personally thank them for their loyalty to the Bobcats over the past two seasons. Thank them for their loyalty to this suck-ass team. Yeah to this team that won nine games out of 86. You guys really... nine games in two years. That's grim. That's real fucking grim. There's no good. The Southern Professional Hockey League will now only have 10 teams in its division.

You know I respect it. I respect it. I respect just being like I'm so bad at this that I just let's just not. Just looking around and be like guys do you want to do this? Are you like are you having fun? No I'm so glad you asked. This sucks. You guys want to go get a beer? Yeah. If we start a book club instead. Read that one of those Ted Chang books, you talk about it, over a couple of cause lights. Hmm, lovely afternoon. Yeah, when you think about it, they may have played for too long due to a breakdown in communication. Sometimes you need somebody to help you with the communication in your relationship and we have that somebody. They are known as Dr. Lucy. It's time for paging Dr. Lucy.

If you find that you are having a little relationship trouble Just to pick up your telephone and dial it on the double 1,800 three one seven five one five five now. Now you're going to be diving to a different subred, 5155, now your page and not going to say Now we're going to be diving into a different subreddit than our usual collection of subreddits full of emotionally disturbed people. This one was a recommendation from listener Ellie who said that we should check out the sub-rated, dog-free. Like child-free, but dog-free. I'm excited. I didn't realize you needed a membership for that. You can just not have a dog at any

time. Oh no, it's so much more than that. I'm excited going to read you a post here with a title, Dogs with Human Names. Is anyone else annoyed with this? I know this might be kind of petty, but I hate it when dogs have human names. I don't really like any animals with human names, but dogs especially defile a name.

I've seen dogs with names like Mason, Delilah, Doris, Hannah, Josh, Christine, Penelope, Kevin, Sophia, Sarah, Adam, Wendy. You know a lot of dogs. You could have just said, you didn't even really need to provide examples. We know what like human-given names are. Sorry, calling a dog Josh is so funny. That's not a name for a dog. Tiny Poodl called Josh. Hey, Josh, th, th, th, th, th, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, tho, th, tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. Do-a, thi-a, thogog-a-a-a-do-a-dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-a,'s hilarious. That's not a name for a dog. Little tiny poodle called Josh.

Hey Josh, you're hungry? Before we get into their reasoning, and I mean, I'm sure it's going to be picked apart by facts and logic, but this whole podcast, pro-giving, extremely bland human names to dogs, right? Yeah, absolutely. This is an animal that sucks its own dick, 40 times a day. His name is Colin. Hey, Colin, stop that. We didn't, Louis was already named when he got him, but if it wasn't called Louis, we would have called him another, just a person's name.

It would have been Doug. Hey, Doug. What up, Doug? I'm so glad he's Louie. They continue. One of these th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the names th the names the names th th th th th the names th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th is th is thooooooo. th. thooooooooo. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Lue. thu thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. listed is my name. And to think a repulsive mutt has it annoys me. Some of these are such pretty names, such as Delilah. Then you give it to a dog, and it suddenly leaves a foul taste in your mouth. She's just mad a dog has her name.

Yeah. I'm not a dog. I'm a human being. Please keep it to sillier names or food names or anything else other than human names. There are plenty of words in the dictionary. I think you're asking for people to name their dogs thing. This is the group that doesn't have dogs. No. This is our dog free.

And they don't want dogs to exist anywhere. They don't want other people to have them either. Theo, would you say that she's barking up the wrong tree? No. Okay. Oh wait, but you can. Oh no, I'm good. I wanted to see if you would and now that I know that you wouldn't, that's really put me off the idea. Fair enough.

Ben? No, I'm fine. There are plenty of words in the dictionary for those animals to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the animals the animals to be to be to be the animals the animals to be to be to be themals to be to be to be to be to be to be named. This is my dog table. This is on we. To pick names meant for humans seems kind of wrong and distasteful. All right, well you're inside. There's something wrong with you. I'm assuming a lot of this subred is people that like don't like the dogs exist in public places now. Yes, problem.

And you're going to get a little taste of that here. It would be, I do think. I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi I do thi, I do thi, I do thi, I do thi, I do to to to to to to to to to to to to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be to be, to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be in public places now. Yes, problem. And you're going to get a little taste of that here. It would be, I do think it'd be really funny to have a dog named object. Yeah. That'd be pretty good. But you can't be like Kevin. No, it's so fun. Kevin's a fantastic name for a dog. Yeah. Greg. Short hair, Bordakoli maybe border collie maybe. Kevin. Yeah. That's Kevin. I think, so you might, if you're being very generous, you might say that the sub-rated is a lot of people that have phobias of dogs or maybe even sensory issues from being around dogs. I don't think that that's, I think those people would be pretty reasonable.

Yeah, I'm going to tell you right now, you don't have to be generous. These people are not that. This one is titled, Do you ever wish you were dog stupid like the majority? They're really just like the child free people, but dogs. Am I going crazy here? All these other people seem to like dogs. I'm so burdened by my understanding that dogs are bad. Ugh! This is also, it's making me thinking a bit in brass eye where he's talking about how he used like cruel language around animals, who is like, we're all used to hearing the phrase frog stupid. This is the closest to that phrase in real life. This man's dog stupid.

If you had a choice, would you stay aware of all the downsides of dogs? Or would you rather be blind to the true nature of dogs? To exist as the sheeple, which they've spelled as sheep-ol. Brainwashed, unaware, clueless, and or those lacking common sense? Myself, I've never been a fan. Having my eyes completely open is liberating. Congratulations, Neo. Welcome to the Desert of the Real. Dogs the shit house.

Taking the dog pill or the no dog pill. A dog piled. No dogs piled. Yeah. Having my eyes complete. To what? To what? They smell. They're loud. They can be rowdy. That's what he sees. He sees the truth now. He sees the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to is is is is is the to is is to is is. Doves. Doves. Doves. Docks. Docks. Docks. Dogs's is is is is is is is. Dogs's is. Dogs's is is. Dogs's is. Dogs's is is. Dogs's is. Dogs's is. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. Dogs. It's is is is is is is is is is is is is is is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the dogs, they smell, they're loud, they can be rowdy. That's

what he sees, he sees the truth now, he sees the code. Yeah, going and doing like Iowasker in a jungle somewhere and coming to the conclusion that dogs are kind of shit. I ain't dogs. I just experienced my own birth 10, thousand times. I was my own mother. Dogs are terrible. This one is titled, Dogs will eat their dead owners corpse. And people still worship the ground dogs walk on. It's actually the same ground as the rest of us. These disgusting, shit-eating beasts eat your corpse after you take care of them for their entire life. Is that even true? Yeah, I don't know if that, I mean, I feel like that's not dog stuff. That was, I feel like that's something people say for cats,

and it was possibly probably not true over there either. Yeah. These fucking dumb creatures are fed and cared for in every aspect of their sad existence, and they're so dumb their brain doesn't even have being grateful in it. I think that's like the primary mood of dogs? Yeah, everything I do, Louis looks at me like. Holy shit, you're a golden god. You're a munch. Thank you. Imagine being a mentally deficient nutter.

You don't have to. Yeah. It's 500-something episodes. You take care of a dog for its entire life. You take care of a nasty dog for its entire life. You feed it every day, you give it treats, you take it on walks in the summer and winter. Yeah. You clean it up. You clean up it nasty and smelly shit. You take you to the vet when he gets injured.

You shower and clean it, but it still stings. You literally dedicate years of your time and energy for this mistake of a creature. If you pass away in your own home, that same nasty dog will just eat your corpse and leave anything it can't consume. I hate mutt so much and I think that anyone is willing to house them and take care of them is mentally ill. Oh my God. I'm on board actually, this is how I talk about Winston. This is an entire subreddit of Patrick Bateman's all.

Oh, I was picturing, I was picturing the, uh, knolled guy in, uh, the trainer with no legs, and possibly no arms in Starship Troopers. Oh yeah. Help me out here. What's that guy's name? Michael Ionside. Thank you. I'm thinking a Michael Ionside.

I'm thinking Michael Iinside. Guys be naming my dog I see. Imagine naming your dog Michael I inside. Get over here Michael I'd say. You'd have to call on the full name. Stop the the the the the the the the the the their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I to to to to to th. I th. I th. tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. I'm tho. thoom. I'm tho. I'm thoom. I'm thoom. I'm tian. I'm thoom. I'm thoom. I'm thoom. I'm thoom. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I's. I'm t. I'm t. I'm t. I'm toda. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. I'm today. today. today. I'm today. I'm 'd have to call him the full name all the time. Yeah. Stop being so gruff. Right now, I want you-

Stop being so rough. Adopt a greyhound and call it Michael Ionside, please. It'd be very good. But all I'm saying is the tone of these posts in this subreddit is like I could really easily imagine swapping out the word dog for homeless person yeah just so angry yeah I feel like all of these people are one step away from saying oh one day a real rain will come you know wash all the filth these streets absolute filth I'm picturing

a they look up at me and I'll whisper, no. Yeah, I whisper bad dog. The bit where agent Smith is going off about how much he hates how the earth smells, being like, they smell, their hair gets everywhere. This one is titled, don't bring your mutt to my fucking birthday party. I hosted my B-day at a very upscale venue on a lake and my cousin tried to bring a dog. She said quote it'd be fine because the lake will tie him out. I was honestly shocked that she thought I'd want a soaking wet smelly lab running around a venue I paid a hefty amount of money to

reserve and cater. Seems like a win-win situation to me. Hey! He's a dog. I had to completely unviteite my my my my my my to invite my to invite my to invite my to invite my to invite my to invite to invite to invite to invite the to invite to invite to invite to invite the to invite to invite to invite to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. to. to. to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I to. I the the the the the the the the the the the the try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to me. Hey! He's a dog. I had to completely un-invite my own cousin from my B-Day Bash because I know she would have tried to bring the dog anyway. Oh my God. Okay. I think it's um... Say no. Just say no.

Just say sorry. The party's actually kind of... It's probably not appropriate for a dog. Yeah. Problem solved. Now clearly this person doesn't say what age they are although that is a common convention for Reddit posts but I'm assuming that these people are not saying I 27 year old female hate dogs right they're not doing that Ben no. Yeah all I'm saying is that I am far more bothered by a human who thinks their birthday is really important than I am by the presence of a dog. That's a real pathology in of itself, huh? Yeah. It's my birthday month.

I think birthdays are nice. Oh, birthdays are absolutely nice, but I think that like, I think you have to go into them just, just hoping to have a nice day. If people do nice stuff for you, or people come out and have a nice dinner with you, that's great. Your friends express some love for you, that's wonderful. The attitude of, it is my expectation that a minimum threshold of outward expressions of love and adoration for me happen. That's a little worrying. And of course there is a very clear vibe here that I don't, that that that that I that I that I that I that I that I that that that that that that that that that th th th th th th th th th th th of outward expressions of love and adoration for me happen. No dogs.

That's a little worrying. And of course there is a very clear vibe here that I don't want the dog at my birthday party because more people will pay attention to the dog. Yeah, because the dog's likable. The dog is going to get some of the attention. The question is, why do you think I want your fucking dog running through a lake and thi storming the their their their their their their their their their their running through a lake and then storming through my pink and white party? Do you think I want your dog pissing in all the bowls of potato chips?

Do you think I want your dog to take a fat smelly shit in the middle of my birthday cake? Is that what you think I want? Do you think I want you to come here and do a fastball special with your wet dog and throw it my tower of champagne glasses? At my pink and white party? Why would you think I wanted that? This person is definitely drawing pictures of the scenarios they think will unfold and looking at them and getting twice as mad? It'll look just like this.

Everyone's going twice as bad. It'll look just like this. Do you think I- Everyone's going to be so messy. Do you think I want your dog to eat all the ice cream and then get a sugar rush and start pulling on my fancy birthday dress until it all rips to shreds? Everybody sees my bare butt? Is that what I want? You think that I want that? You don't know me at all! Do you think a pink and white party is a type of party or she's just describing how the party will look? It's a pink and white party. I'm assuming everything's just pink and white. Yeah.

Describing a theme, in my opinion. Sorry, she continues here. Storm me through my pipah white party around food and other people in a venue that required a damage deposit that I want back. Very delusional. Don't side your posts. Do you want to put a chicken wing in my mouth that's dripping in dog saliva? I've, I've ordered a chicken wing in my mouth that's dripping in dog saliva.

I've ordered a lot of large connected sausage links. And if you think I want your dog grabbing one end of it and running away, while I have to chase him around, Ben over double. You've got another thing coming. There's a great comment here. So they've used a asteris here to... Asterix to illustrate action. Drum builds up to Bass Drop.

Don't bring your mutt to my fucking birthday party. Epic whob-bbbub bass drop. That's so fucking cool. Geez. Got another one here. Dog in Stroller in Whole Foods. I just love to see that. It'd be adorable.

We saw that in South Korea so many times. I think it's wonderful. You know you can take your dog to Bunnings but they just have to sit inside the trolley? Have you seen? Are you serious? Yeah. It's fucking out cookies with the missus nice. You can't do it with Louis because of size constraints. Yeah. I was picking out cookies with the Mrs. the other night at our local Whole Foods.

My wife was taking her time and I suggested we give this guy hovering around us a chance to pick out some cookies. Americans are spending time picking out cookies. How long do you need to pick your cookies? You should know your cookie? You know what your cookie is. After we step the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their th s s s s s s s s s s s s s s sa to sa to sa thukiia to sa toeckookookook. I'm toeck. I'm toozyk. I'm toozy. I'm. I's is. I's is. I's is. I's is. I their. I their. I their. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I. I th. I. I. I tree. I tree. I tree. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's is. I'm t. I'm t. I'm t. I'mau.eck.eck.eck.eau.eau.eau.au.a'c.eau.eau.au.au. I'mau. You should know your preference. You know what your cookie is. After we step aside to give him some room, I notice he's got a dog in a stroller. I'm a little bit of a jerk and not worried about looking like an ass. So I pulled out my smartphone and I asked my assistant. He means his Siri, I believe. He's a robot. Yeah, loudly enough for this guy to hear, Ah, a dog's allowed in grocery stores in state name placeholder. So whatever he's, whatever state he lives in.

Loll, I already knew the answer. I just wanted to be an ass. That's so, everyone in Holfoots thinks you're so funny. They're all going home and talking about how funny you are. And also, they're really, they're really, they look up to you as, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, the person, th, th, they're really, yeah, they're really, uh, they look up to you, you know, the person who can actually speak up, say that we're all thinking, you know, dim, I wish I could have said that to him. It's also really impressed that he could access information on his phone and they're having to type anything. That's fucking crazy, dog. I think it's very telling that people who do this kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I'm thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I thi, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I tham. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I thi. Damn, I themselves as like, I confronted the guy?

Yeah. It's like you didn't though. You didn't. You didn't even bold enough to confront him. You did a passive aggressive bitch move in the supermarket and said, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna catally talk about. I feel like that happened. That happened not very long ago.

I was having dinner with some people and they were like, people at a nearby table, a big, big family had gotten together and they had a lot of kids with them and the family had collectively said, we don't know these kids. Like they had just gone, we're going to sit over here, they're going to do whatever. Those kids were going fucking Lord of the Flies mode. I could not wait to leave that venue because I was just stressed out by what was in my field of vision. There was a playground out in this beer garden and like one of the kids is legit. Like he had climbed all the way up the playground to the roof

of the thing and then had gone from there onto the roof of the pub. Like he was fucking gone. Other kids going full fight the th th th th th th th th th. thuuuuuuu-ff. th th the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the the theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the the there onto the roof of the pub? Like he was fucking gone. Other kids going full fight club down into thing, wailing on each other with their thongs, like in their hands, just going beast mode. And the person I was, one of the people I was with was like, oh yeah, I like to just very loudly remark about how rude this is to do within earshot of these other people. And I'm like...

Have you seen these fucking kids? You've seen these... I wouldn't take my horrible, feral kids to a pub. Except that I was like, no, that's not improving the situation for me. No, that's awful behavior. You've just made me annoyed and uncomfortable. Yeah, I, I, Ithat. Yeah. I also need to be another layer of socially uncomfortable. Yeah. I'm stressing embarrassed. Don't be, don't, nothing ever gets better if you're passive aggressive. Just get up, grab one of the kids.

Yep. Throw him into traffic. Yeah. Throw the other ones up on the pub roof. I snapped a photo of the guy to post a Reddit. Psycho. Yep. Uh, submit with my food contamination complaint to my local health department and submit alongside my complaint to Whole Foods. I made sure he was aware I was capturing his image for posterity. You're like borderline assaulting the man at this point. Hey, uh, our fuckheads allowed at the Dipshoot store? Hey, wait a second, I'm taking a photo.

That would have been a great response if you were the stroller guy, getting your little Siri out. Fucking losers are allowed at Whole Foods? Are you allowed? Oh wait, no, photos of a stranger in whole foods. Like, like again, if you actually had a problem with this, you could, number one, say to the guy, you know what, I don't think you're meant to have your dog in here around all this food. If you genuinely thought it was a fucking problem or whatever.

Yeah. And also, go over to someone in the store and say, this makes me uncomfortable. Is this cool what's happening over here???. they. they. their. their. tha. thuuuu. thu. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I's, thi. I's, thin. I's, thin. I's, tho. I's, thin't, thin' is, thin' is, thin' is, thin' is, tho, tho, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It, th. It, th. It's, th. It's, thin, thin, thin, thin, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, theeanan. I's, thean. I's, thean. I's a theananananananananan't than't this, is this, is this cool what's happening over here? And they'll either say, I don't care, which is what anybody working in a fucking Holfoots should say to you. This is not, I'm getting paid $8 an hour. By Jeffrey Benzos. Yeah, yep. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. . There's Whole Foods. I'm going to the bedstor. There's going to be more dogs here tomorrow. Go to Trader Joe's or whatever. Yeah, like, like go talk to someone. It's bizarre to be like, I'm going to kind of audibly be a bitch to everybody. And then I'm going to leave and write some letters. Pesthetic move. And post on the worst person alive. He's done like every possible shithead movie could have done here at this point, leaving him only one.

I complained to the nearest Whole Food employee, but she responded as though she wanted my obnoxiousness to end as soon as possible, as opposed to enforcing our county's health codes. When I got home, I complained to both Whole Foods, told health department. Whole Foods replied with some ADA copy paste and I was like, It was in a stroller. I'm pretty sure it wasn't a service animal. Please re-educate the store regarding the county's health codes. My local health department is probably sick of hearing from me. Yeah, no probably about it. They used to call me to follow up with my complaints, but I haven't heard back from them yet, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their, their, th, th, th, th, their, th, th, th, th, th. th, their, th. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, their, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, th. th. th. th. th. th. their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. the. thr. thrown, throwne. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, throwne. throwne. throwne, throwne, the. th call me to follow up with my complaints, but I haven't heard back from them yet regarding this one. If you're a frequent complainer, like to follow up with my complaints, how many have you made?

Yeah. Like, the problem is you. I think it, yeah, like, maybe like read back what you've written and like, have a time to reflect on yourself? You sound reasonable, right? You're not placing yourself in an environment that is setting you up for happiness. If every day is a struggle and you feel that the world around you is entirely wrong, and you feel powerless to overcome it, go somewhere else. Yeah, try living inside a rhodium cube. Yeah, no dogs in there, pal, unless you bring one with you. A comment here that I'd like to read to you. Upduted immediately because of hilarious

photo. Now those of you in the document can scroll down and look at the photo which you will see. So he's put a sort of a silly sticker over the man's face. This is in the bakery department of a Whole Foods. There is a man and sure enough he's got a very, very small poodle wearing a little pink jacket in a pram. He's been pushed with- It's got gray hair, it looks elderly. Yeah, it's an old dog. The pram is being pushed with one hand. The man's also using the pram to put his groceries in. His other hand is occupied with a walking aid.

He has a cane. I would also notice that all of the other food in frame is sealed in plastic packaging and up on shelves and there is a there is a display case of baked goods behind him which is all behind glass. And the dog is secured in a pram. The dog is secured in a pram not touching any of the food, any of the work surfaces, or even the floor. And dogs are like, sorry, poodles are like hypoilogenic as well, so they're not even like shedding that much. Yeah, like I'm, you know, I just feel like that's not a particularly hilarious photo. It's just a guy sort of living his life. Man in his own business. business. I'm not really sure what the hilariousness comes into it.

He's still got that updute nevertheless. You can take that all the way to the bank. That's right. I have one more for you. This one is titled, My husband is finally given up. Yay! Whoa! This is honestly, yeah. I realize that my husband is finally given up on the idea that I'll ever like dogs.

I'm so happy. He finally stopped trying to show me stupid dog videos and asking, isn't it cute? Seven years of replying, no, it's fucking disgusting, finally worked. Now he will shut a movie off if it has a dog, because, quote, he doesn't want to hear me laughing if the dog gets hurt or dies. Your husband is planning to leave you. Your husband is packing his bags.

Your husband has met someone else. He's gone. He's put in there's four rental applications currently pending. Dog carcass in Alley this morning. Tire Trout on first stomach. Good. Seven years and he finally gets it. All his attempts have simply done the opposite. They've all just been practice opportunities for me against real dog idiots.

Quote, don't you want to pet my dog? No, the only parasites I like are babies and the tongue-stealing variety. Who the fuck, who whoever approaches other people and says, hey, you gotta pat my dog or what? Yeah, hurry up to pat my dog. It's fucking the other way around. Everyone's always like, hey, is it okay if I pat your dog? No. Yeah, don't touch it.

He's kind of a biter. That's all right. I will tell people like, oh he's straight I'm going to try and put his tongue directly in your mouth and they're like, oh I have dogs, it's fine. All right. Blud-blah-blah. Quote, look how smart that dog is. Her reply to this theoretical person, my cat does that in his sleep with no training required. If that's smart, then I'm not surprised you're you you you that you're that you're that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's not sa' that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's smart that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's wavelengths. What the fuck is your- She's a cat lady too.

My cat's so intelligent and interesting. It's not. It's not. My husband simply weaponized me over seven years. What? This is like the Canadian secret program that made Wolverine, but for making a lady who's really good at hating dogs. Weapon fuckwit. He finally realized it. Regrets that it had

the opposite intended effect and I got a really good laugh at the fact he thought he would break me of hating dogs. Yeah, I bet he's got a few regrets. Yeah, probably one big one. This is her own, this is how she finishes this. Just adding this one to the why I want a divorce pile. Oh, lady. You should just get one. You should just straight up and take that divorce. You're not happy. Let your husband go, let Steve go.

Yeah, he'll probably just go and buy a dog. He's gonna go get two rescue staffy crosses, and they're gonna be called Chuck and Hank, and he's gonna have... You see me so much happier without you. Oh my god, every morning he's gonna wake up, and he's gonna take those dogs and people are gonna see him be like, have you seen the guy with the two staffies for the litter

that are called Chuck and Hank? and they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really like really friendly. We always really sexy ladies that like want to chat to him about because of the dogs. They'll be like deliberately bending over in low cut tops to pat the dogs and being like, hey Steve, are you busy this afternoon? You'll be like, oh, I didn't know life could be like this. Yeah, but I'm actually taking a break of being really hurt by prior relationship. So it's just a threat. Before before before before say yes to anything, are you a psychopath about dogs? Are you sort of an animal murder?

Would you laugh if he died? Is there like a topic that gets you going on the internet and just posting like a freak? Have you ever heard of... She would laugh every time a dog-free? She would laugh every time a dog got hurt in a movie. I don't even have the to have thape thape thape thoom thoom tho tho tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. We had to turn off John Wick because she was laughing too hard in the first 10 minutes when the little puppy that his wife, who had died of cancer, his one true love, she gave him this puppy and the puppy died and she had like tears of joy running down her face.

Is that normal? Am I the asshole? We got to the part in I am legend where the dog had to be put down.. She she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she was the dog had the dog had the dog had the dog had the dog. She was the dog. She was just just just just just just just the dog. She was just just the dog. She was just the dog. She was just the dog. She was the dog. the dog. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the part in I am legend where the dog had to be put down she's just screaming Yes! Yeah! Get him! Talking to your friend at brunch, I met this cute guy yesterday. He had a dog named Michael Ironside. It was so funny and cute. People are psychos. People are psychos. That's some of the most psycho stuff I've heard from Reddit. If you don't like dogs, just don't like them. I just don't get one. Like it's just so fine. Like I get there a lot of dogs everywhere. But also, I feel like if I see a dog when I'm like going for a walk or whatever, it's still kind of a novelty. Whenever I pass on with a dog, I'm like, I give them a little smile. I look at the dog and I smile with the dog. I'd say, hey, the owners, because it's nice.

It's not like I'm fucking crowded out by dogs everywhere. It's not like I can't be somewhere without being like, oh fuck, there's another dog here. Dogs everywhere. I don't know, man. As a, I say, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, it. It's, it. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's I's I's I's I's I's I'm. It's I'm. It's I'm. It's I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the think we've probably discussed this before. As a reasonably large man, sometimes like, you know, you look at somebody and smile and make a little chit-chat and they go, huh. But you can always smile at their dog and say hello. That's the cheat code for not threatening somebody. It's like a universal icebreaker.

It's so fucking nice. I get so many more like good mornings and good afternoons and hellos and stuff. Walk and Lou, it's the fucking best. People just, people like to talk. Yeah, here's the thing. They're going to be looking at your dog. You'll see them looking at your dog. You'll see them looking at your dog. And they'll look up at you and know that you saw that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you saw that you that you that you saw that you saw that you saw that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you that you saw the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th saw saw th. thou saw saw th. th. the th. the th. the th. the the thou the the th. the the the th. the the the th. and give them a little, just a little smile. You both do the, oh he's nice isn't he, face at each other. Yeah. Would you guys say that you would like to pet every dog-o? Yeah, and also boop their snoots.

Yeah, remember that? Yeah, remember that? Oh, it's a little fluffy heckin' papa. What are you talking about? You're 32. What are you mean? Man, I hate dogs. I fuck dogs! Fuck dogs! Yeah.

Those people are still alive, by the way, and they haven't changed. Yeah. Good for that. If that's you. Come on now. Come on. Like, I'm just, I think, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thin. I thin. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I, I, I, I th. I, I th. I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thin. I thin. thin. th. thin. th. th. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha't have to, inside, you can be as crazy as you like. We're all deeply mentally unwell. Everyone's got their things, but just sort of, just be a bit normal about stuff.

Like 95% of the things that you say to somebody else should just be like regular sentences, sort of like start and end in the normal way. You get a buffer for like some weird stuff. Yeah, you give yourself 5% freak time. Yeah, that's right. JFK time. Yeah, everything I say is normal. Yeah, I've never been not normal before. Yeah, that's right.

So you're a one completely neurotypical normal person. I'm posting an odd dog right now about Winston. I don't know if I've ever heard you say a nice thing about Winston. He's awful. It's most awful dog that's ever lived. Makes me ill. He's a burden to us. Very cute though. How do you feel any breath on you, Lucy?

He's just repulsive. I would never get a pug. So I've obviously inherited this dog through my relationship. And every breath is year old pug and every breath is like is just like he should not be alive. Was this, did, was the pug Pat's choice? Did he be like I want a pug? Yes, which I think is a fucked up thing to do. Why are you as a man?

Chosing a pug? Get a normal dog. Go to a shelter and say, oh, what's this word? When they say, I have no idea, you go, that's perfect. That's the guy. Wonderful. Yeah, plus he's been in here for five years because he's too lonely. Yeah.

That's right. Folks, you could if you wanted to say that a dog was a kind of animal. Yeah. Oh, he's good. Now, there are many other kinds of animals out there in nature, but every now and then we kidnap the ones from nature and we put them inside a prison for animals that we like to call a zoo. Ben, what we're saying recently that we, that we like to call a zoo. Ben, what are we saying recently that we, that we have decided that the Zoo Watch segment

is distinct from the Nature Corner segment? Yes, because there's a lot of stuff going on at zoos. And zoos are sort of the opposite of nature. Yeah, nature is what happens outside the zoo. the nature is what happens outside the zoo. Yeah, life is what happens. That's so, life is what happens when you're busy making plants. What's that one? Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.

That's right. Nature is what happens outside of zoo. So we are going to have to develop a Zoo Watch theme, but for the moment let us simply say, Zoo watch. This comes to us from KMOV in St. Louis, Missouri, the Kamov. Bear escapes enclosure, a lude staph for 90 minutes, zoo reports. You know, there's notoriously small bears Yeah, that's a feature like activity to watch by the way Where do you want to watch? I don't know we watch this bear get away from these handlers about the same length as a regular movie

Uh, officials at a zoo in Missouri safe staff found a bear outside of its enclosure Tuesday morning. Hey, hang on. Hey, he shouldn't be there. Wait a second, he's in nature now. Uh, KMOV reports staff at the St. Louis zoo located an Andean bear named Ben. Oh, that's my name. Does that make you fucking furious that a disgusting animal has your name?

This bear has defiled my name. Going down to legally change your name on Monday morning one. You can't give bears human names. Oh, hey. You should have called it brick. Hey, it's a tapioca. If you have a chance, folks. If you're in the car and driving right now, just take out your phone, don't take it off the accelerator.

And Google an Andean bear or spectacled bear. Oh, it looks like he's got little glasses on. Oh, now that's a handsome fella. Yeah, they got fun faces. Oh, how handsome. They look kind of like the doberman of bears or something. Yeah, absolutely. I was thinking exactly the same thing. Oh, there's a little baby one. That's cute. Very emotive eyebrows. Yeah, now a podcast is, of course, an audio format. Yeah, but we're describing an image in your mind with our words.

Yeah, we're just saying that's a nice bear. Look at this bear. Yeah and ideally the perfect podcast is four people going awe he's nice about something you can't see. It is apparently though South America's largest predator. So you know you're not it's not rolling under the couch is also. Yeah. Representatives with the zoo said it took the team. No, I want you to say the way the face felt it in the article. Because this is the worst typo I have seen it in five years of doing this podcast. Okay, ready? Represiatn vs.

That's not even like they got two letters around the wrong way. They got to the end of the word and just kind of went blah blah blah. Yeah it's really, they will mash in the keyboard at the end there I think. But then moved on. Yeah. Don't have time to look backwards like that, you know? Yeah. It's like I saw, uh, tragically I saw this old guy have what I thinked thinked thinked thinked thinked, what I thinked, what I thinked, what I thinked, what I thinked, what I thi, what I thi, thi, thi, thi, thag-a, thag-a, thag-a, thag-a, that, thag-a, thag-a, thag-a, thag-a, thag-a, that, we that, we that, we that, we'll that, we'll that, that, we th. th. th. th. th. th. th, we th, we th, we th, we th, we th, we th, we'll th, we'll th, that, that, that, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the, the, the, think was a stroke in the waiting room for an ophthalmologist. And then the medics came and they sat him up and they said, oh, you know, you've just had a little, you've just had a little, little, what would you call it, you know, a little episode

or something like that and he says, no, I haven't. How do you argue with that, you know? It's like a shark, I only looks forwards. Mm-hmm. Billy Brennan, director of public relations at the zoo, said it was a challenge to get the bear sedated because it was in a heavily wooded area difficult to get a clear tranquilizer shot. You'd have to give him like two beers. I don't th know, I don't th know, I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the, the, thiou the' the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, a the the the the the the the the thi thi thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii' thii' thi' th shot. You'd have to give him like two beers? I don't know how much beer is a lot. To tranquilize a bear. Yeah. Well Andre the Giant drank 94 beers that one time and I don't think he was 300

per hour. How many boonies do you reckon a bear is? Just sorry I hate to... I know we're already over time and I hate to back pedal. I think sharks eyes are their their their is are their is are their is are their is their is their is their is their is their is their eyes to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to give to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be their their their their their their their their their their their th. the. the. try. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. tha. toe. toe. toe. thetime and I hate to back-bettle. I think shark's eyes are mostly on the side of their head. Yeah. They can only swim forwards. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a hundred beers I think. Yeah, at least. For the record, Andre the giant weighed 236 kilos. Oh, my goodness. That's 236 kilos. My goodness. That's a big boy. Is that his like wrestling number or his actual number? Because you know how they'll just be like. Yeah, build as.

Well, often Wikipedia in its little information segment for professional wrestlers will have their height and their weight. So here we go. Andre the Giants thing goes, his build height was 7 foot 4 inches and his build weight was 520 pounds. So yeah, like saying Ben, that's the weight that they would say he was when they were announcing the most thing doesn't actually mean. Sorry, I got my Andre the giant beer numbers so many beers. It's a hundred 19 12-ounce beers so that's a hundred and nineteen schooners. Let's assume one point two

standards a schooner because it's probably a reasonable strength beer. In six hours he consumed a hundred and forty-two standard drinks. Boy would I be acting silly. Act in the fool at that point. You know I'm going to say some shit that I tel myself I would never tel tel to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 12 to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their one to to to to to to toe to toe to toe.1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1st.1 1st.1 to to to their their acting the fool at that point. You know I'm going to say some shit that I told myself I would never tell anyone else. So true. 140 standard drinks got me acting unwise. Now, a average male Indian bear is about 115 kilos, which is about half of one André the Giant. But this one specifically is 150 kilos. 150 kilos.

So it's so so that's about 50 beers. So you'd actually, yeah, you need to give him fewer beers. And Andre the Giant survived. But slightly more than Boone. So we're sitting somewhere between Boone and Andre the Giant. I think the thing though with Andre the Giant was that he could essentially just keep drinking beer at pace. Oh, at the rate that he's metabolizing it. Yeah, yeah, and the size of him means, and the strength of beer and everything means that he could essentially just sit and

drink beer endlessly and he'd never be like passing out drunk or anything. Oh, you're saying, sorry, this is a reference for children, but it's like in the adventure, the Jake gets poisoned and he just makes his liver unbelievably large so that it doesn't affect him. He has big liver. Yeah. Billy Brennan, director of public relations at the zoo, said it was a challenge to get the bear sedated because I've already read this sentence. That was challenging. Brennan said Ben was eventually placed back into the enclosure. The animal was reportedly checked medically after the incident. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theably. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thivevevevedivably thiavelly thiavelly thively. I this th. I this this this th. I. I. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It is is is is th. It is this. It is th. It is. It's is thi. It's is this. It's is thi. It's is thi. It's is theeevea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea.ea. It's is. It's is. It's is. It's is th. It's is this sentence. That was challenging. Brennan said Ben was eventually placed back into the enclosure. The animal was reportedly checked medically after the incident and doing fine. According to Brennan, Ben was meddling with

steel mesh in the enclosure which caused one of the steel cables to break, naughty bear. There was try something to make a glory hole. This created a small hole for the bear to climb through. I think if the bear weighs 150 kilos. It's probably not that small. Yeah. I think they're downplaying the size of this hole. Oh, I think bears can actually fit through any hole that's the same diameter as its beak.

Yeah. You know, you know the kind of hole you would picture like Jerry coming out of in a Tom and Jerry cartoon? Yeah. I reckon it would be bigger than that. We got a Jerry situation. Yeah, just one Jerry hole. Jerry hole, thanks. Representatives with the zoo said the team is now in the process of inspecting the habitat and others that have a similar steel mesh enclosure to ensure something like this doesn't happen again. The St. Louis the the the the the th th th th th th th th th thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. to to to to to too. I too. I too. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. I th. th. I'll. the. I'll. I'm. the. I'm. the. to. the. to. to. to. to. to. to.e. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. I'm. I'm. I'm.. St. Louis Zeus said the incident happened before it opened at 10 a.m.

So no one was in danger, but it did cancel its morning preschool classes that day. There is an alternate universe where this story has a wildly different time. The bear did not need to be sedated as it fell asleep, happy and full. Oh, Ben's having a nap. That's nice. Hey, what are all these little shoes? Oh, Ben's having a nap. That's nice. Hey, what are all these little shoes? Isn't the bear that goes wild on the Simpsons?

Gentle Ben. Gentle Ben. Yep. There you go. Yeah, except he eats people in the audience, I think is the implication. Yeah. This could have been funnier. Yeah. Yeah. Well. I love gentle Ben's helmet with the microphone. Oh I love a gentle bear.

So officials called Tuesday's incident extremely rare. Our bears are barely ever letting themselves out. Once a month tops. Don't tell me that it's rare. That just smacks of desperation. Yeah this barely ever happens. This is like twice. This is the second time. It's never happened before. Yeah. It has the first time this is happening. Folks, this is what we in the industry call an episode.

An episode of the podcast of Buntavista. Thank you for joining us. And, uh, we hope that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that you and that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that Thank you for joining us. And we hope that you and your children don't get eaten by a bear. Yeah, that's true. We hope that if you and your family do get a dog, that you will give the dog a good and funny name. Yep. Yes. Mitch on the lips.

Yep. And we hope that none of you accidentally marry a dog psycho. Like you don't have to own a dog. No one's obligated to own a dog. We don't have a dog. We haven't got a puppy because we have an elderly cat, you know? It doesn't mean I'm anti-dog. It's just like, I don't think this is a dog phase of life at the moment. Whereas you would be bummed out if you married someone about putting down all the dogs you see personally? Yeah, do you ever think about that? Do you ever lie awake at night thinking about that? Do you think that if you're like really good? Have you not slept?

Do we throttle a dog with your bare hands? Hey, thanks for joining us for Free Me and Freebury. This episode is free, uh, Fremium Freebrewary. If you want to pay for the podcast and get two episodes a week every week outside of the month of Freebrewery, consider it. Yeah. Think about it. Yeah. Patreon.com slash. Bute of the stuff. Stay frosty. Get your pants up. Keep one gun in a, what are those called again, the Sam, what's the top holster? Sam Brown holster and one in your pants. And maybe one underneath your hat. One on your bracelet.

One on your ADHD bracelet. Yeah. See you next time, everybody. Bye. I think.