Boozy Bookgasms - Don't Hiss and Tell

Episode Date: January 14, 2026

Kiss of the Basilisk by Lindsay Straube Jen, Lynn and Kim are joined by a fairy loving friend to recap this story where Game of Thrones meets The Batchelor. Put your claws away, pour a drink and get ready for some hissssterics!   Signature Cocktail: Bloody Snake Bite Tonight’s drink, the Bloody Snake Bite, is as dangerous as it is divine—sweet at first sip, with a bite that lingers just long enough to make you question your choices. A perfect match for Kiss of the Basilisk—tempting, thrilling, and memorable. Ingredients: 2 oz Southern Comfort 4 oz cranberry juice 1 oz lime juice  lime wedge Ice red edible glitter Add a handful of ice cubes to a highball glass. Pour in Southern Comfort and top with cranberry juice, splashes of lime and edible glitter. Lightly stir and garnish with lime wedge.   

All right. Let's go, bitches. Book Love Clititure Fans. We're in for some boozy bookgasms today. Join three cousins creating a titillating headspace where steamy romance novels collide with strong cocktails. So sit back, sip slow, and enjoy the ride. Hello and welcome back to boozy bookasms. I'm Jen. I'm Lynn.

I'm Kim. Oh. Who's here? you guys. A special guest. Yay. Hey. Hi, ladies. It's Amy. It's Amy. Well, if you listen to our fairy smut episodes, Amy will sound very familiar. Welcome back to the show, Amy. You know, I can't miss a good fantasy smut. I mean, I'm always back for it. This is a completely different situation. Yes. Amy has returned to help us talk about Kiss of the Basilisk by Lindsay Straub. But before we slither in between the sheets of this book, Kim, what are we drinking tonight?

Okay, so this one is fascinating. It's called the Bloody Snake Fight, which is very appropriate for this book. It is as dangerous as it is divine, sweet at first dip with a bite that lingers just long enough to make you question your life choices. It's a perfect match. It's got some southern comfort, some cranberry juice, some lime juice. It's delicious. And just for kicks, I add red edible glitter, a little luster dust in there to make it shimmery, very sexy drink. So put in lime. Like back to my college days. I was just going to say this won't be the first time Southern Comfort made me question my life choice.

Yeah, exactly. Like a frat party, like the walk. Yeah. I'm feeling like early aunt vibes. But it's classy because we have glitter, guys. Well, that's what makes it classy. Glitter is classy as shit. You guys, knock it on.

I have questions. Fine. We're going to start with our female main character. Her name is Temperance. She goes by Tim. She is 20 years old and is being raised by a single mom who is also the village chicken farmer. Tim's kind of a social pariah because of this, but she is the lucky fortune of being born in the same year as the prince. All girls born the year of the prince are in a bachelor type of competition to win his hand.

And in order to be more appealing to the prince, they are trained sexually by a basilisk. For those of you that don't know what a basilisk is. Actually, I would like all of you to comment who knew what a basilisk was before you started reading this book. I did not. It was a Harry Potter thing. Harry Potter. Yeah, I didn't know. I didn't read Harry Potter, but Harry Potter people know what it is.

But the Harry Potter basilisk is like really, really, really big. What it is is a very beautiful, gorgeous man who can turn into a snake. I don't know how it worked on Harry Potter. But in this book, if you look into the eyes of a basilisk, while they are in snake form, you will turn into stone. So many years ago, there was a war in this village against the basilists and the humans. And after the war, they formed a peace treaty that included the stipulation that they would sexually train all the girls born in the year of the prince. That is so specific, but that is part of the treaty. And it's part of their peace pact.

It's also very weird. Unhinged. Well, the prince needs to have a woman who will satisfy him, his reign. Well, and the basilists are really good at sex. I have two questions. First, snakes are not great at sex. They're just, they're snakes. Well, these snakes are.

And is it a snake that turns into a man or a man that turns into a snake? I think it's a snake that turns into a man. I think it's a snake that turns into a beautiful, gorgeous. Agreed. I think the snake is their original form. And it's very Medusa-esque to have the stone element. element in it. So there's a lot of questions for me here. It's a culture shock. Proceed. This story will take us on a journey. So we begin. Tim and 13 other girls head down to the caves where

this is where the basilists are. They are there for their first night of training and Tim meets her basilis. His name is Caspin. I don't hate that. It's a hot name. Yeah, no, I didn't. She is so virginal. Like, she has not even kissed a boy. She's nervous. Very nervous. Unlike the rest of the horrors in the village. She's tomboyish, right? Like she's never really had a boyfriend and she's the chicken farmer's daughter. So she's got a bit of a stigma around her and kind of scene is like she's never going to win the prince's hand. So Caspin tells her he's not going to touch her tonight, but he does need to see her. He wants her to strip naked and Tim says, you first. Good girl. You first is a theme in this book. We're going to hear that a few different times. Right. Especially with the basilisks. So

Caspin's like, hey, no problemo. And he takes off all his clothes and Tim enjoys the glorious view of him because, you know, he's hot, of course. The way that she writes this book, I could picture everything. I could picture the cave. I could picture him. I could picture his attitude. His smirks like everything. The roaring fire with all of it.

Yes. Gorgeous. The way she paints the picture of this world is beautiful. I enjoyed this journey quite a bit. Actually, I was the first one to read this book. And I kind of tricked Lindsay. Kind of? I knew.

I knew. It was not kind of. Like, you're all the way tricked me. I may have told her it was not a part of a series. And then she read it 600 pages later. She's like, fuck you. And guess what? The second book wasn't out yet.

That's my like worst nightmare. No, it comes out November 11th. Yay. And then I got Amy to read it. And then Kim was like, I feel so left out. Oh, you sold. me on one of the sex scenes. You were like, so this is what happens? And I was like, what? Yeah. Wait a minute. What? Oh, yeah. I need to know more. So, yeah. I told my colleague to read this book and I said,

Kiss to the Basilis. She pinged me and she said, you didn't tell me the full title. It starts with split or swallow. That's true. That's a good call out. It's a little of a tagline. Yeah. I'm like, you're welcome. It's kind of like their publishing company or something. Yeah. I think it's like more of like the name the series. So Caspin does some sort of magic to make sure that Tim is fertile, and she is. So no problem there. And then he tells her, like, okay, you need to gain some weight because the prince likes curves. She's like, listen, I'm just a poor chicken farmer's daughter. We don't have a lot of food. And Caspin's like, after our sessions, I'll bring you some food. Now, at this point, Tim has taken off her clothes. And Caspin tells Tim to spread her legs. They have a connection. And she

starts masturbating. Well, and they have a connection while she was going into the cave, and we'll find out why later. It's a pull. She knew exactly where to go. She knew exactly which cave to go into. You can sense their chemistry right out of the bat. Totally. They have a sexual moment, and they masturbate together. Tim says, can we come together? And Caspin says, no, you first. So again, with the you first. Tim finishes first. So then Caspin finishes in his hand. And Tim thinks his cum looks like a handful of liquefied pearls and said it was beautiful. Can I just say gross? This book is like kind of obsessed with cum. They utilize it quite a bit. It's like another character in the book. Yeah. Caspin cups his hands around his cum and turns it into a claw. And he gives it to Tim. He tells her to put inside of her and it will connect them while they are apart. The claw is like a magical vibrator. Yeah, you can get these. Bluetooth. Like a magical vibrating tampon.

Oh, I don't think it's like a tampon. That sounds uncomfortable. It sounds less comfortable than a claw. I'm just like back that up. But it's not like a claw, like multi-clothed. It's like one claw. It didn't have fingernails. But it seems to like hook over, you know.

Yeah. It's putting her in all the right places, okay? Exactly. Like a shadow rabbit. I don't know. I'm trying to figure this out in my brain. Over the course of the next day, the claw pulses. That's how Tim knows Casman's thinking about her.

And it's like kind of sweet. It's a wee vibe. That's what it is. Kim brings up her sex toy knowledge. Hey, hey, hey. But he does bring her to climax in church, which is awkward. Yeah, she's sitting next to her mom. Singing the hymns.

But she's also watching her slutty. Her frenemy. The one that's mean to her. all the time. We'll get to Vera. But she's watching her go down on her boyfriend in church. So weird town. It is kind of a weird town. Sex hungry. It's small town, Kim. It's a village. We know how that works. They're also 18. And training to, you know, be perfect concubines to a prince. So she does have another session with Caspen and he teaches her how to do a hand job. And she masters that pretty quickly. They're getting closer and closer. But then the next night, she has to go to the castle because the prince wants to meet as contestants.

And it really is like The Bachelor. It's like a horrible version of The Bachelor. Yeah. It's really demeaning. Caspin sends her this gorgeous dress to wear so that she is sure to impress the prince. And I should say, Caspin has a reputation. He is known in the village as the Serpent King. And all of his girls always win the hand of the prince.

They live for a lot. Like the humans are human lives, but the serpents are centuries old. So he's been training the wives of the princes for centuries. Yeah, he's gotten a lot of tail. Very good at it. But more importantly, to the dress, he sends her a golden necklace that has a charm on it that's in the same shape as the claw vibrator. I'm trying to picture it in my head. I'm like, is it a paw?

Is it a paw? What does it look like? So I'm saying it's like a shadow rabbit. It's like this. I just feel like it's like a swoop. Like a hook? Like a captain hood? Yes, like a shadow rabbit.

Or like a ladle. Like a ladle. So Tim gets all dolled up, right? In the dress that Casman Center, she has to the castle. And she's extremely overwhelmed by the opulence of it. The palace is covered in gold. There's gold in the floor. There's so much access.

it's off pudding. A lot of fancy food. And she thinks about like, oh my gosh, me and my mom are starving every other night. And like they have all this food going to waste. It's just ghost. Kind of like the capital. Just like Hunger Games capital. You're right.

Per usual, right? Like they're taking all the village girls and then putting them in a castle and like trying to seduce them. This was like the least offensive part because she just felt so normal for a book like this. There's many more offensive parts than the opulence. There are other. problems here. So she meets the princess sister Lily, who is very charming and precocious. Lily says, oh, I just want to bet. Leo told me he didn't think any of the girls would be pretty, and I know he's going to like you. Tim loves her immediately. They're insta friends. She's great. And then Tim starts wandering the castle,

even though she's not supposed to. She finds this room as sort of like a large library office type thing, and she reaches for a skull that's like sitting on a shelf, and Caspin zaps her through their connection. And he tells her not to touch that because it doesn't belong to her. So she can hear Caspin speaking to her through her mind, which is very common in these Romantici books. Because of the Claw. The Claw and some other stuff.

Something else. Like that's the first that we're introduced to like their little mind connection. We think it's the Claw, but it is. He shows her in her mind images of, the war between the basilists and the humans. And it makes her kind of sad. Yeah. But then the prince walks in, Prince Leo, Anna asks, are you looking for something? And they have a really tense exchange. They have a connection, but she is combative with him. He's clearly attracted to her, vice versa. I thought it was so interesting how differently she interacted with the two guys. Like with

Caspin, he's the boss, right? And then with Leo, her game with him is. hard to get. I don't think she ever thought she would get him. So I think she walked into the bachelor thinking she was never going to be the top choice. That's true. She was just going to be true to herself. And she thought he was cocky. So as much as she kind of had an attraction to him and kind of liked him, she also wanted to give it back to him and take back some of her own for being the chicken farmer girl the whole time. And then he wanted to goad her too. And their kind of mutual animosity made them attracted to each other, which was. part of the fun, I think, of their relationship.

Yeah, that bickering. But I don't think it was that different because she also gave back to Caspin. It was a different level, but she also pushed back on him. I think this was her trying to figure out who she was. She's young. But also her relationship with Caspin is, at the end of the day, it's a throwaway. She's not meant to have a relationship with him. So she can go to him all day long.

Like, it doesn't matter. Right. You just has to teach her. But her relationship with the prince is really interesting because she just doesn't think he'll pick her. So she's almost trying to protect herself. Yeah. She's just trying to stay in the competition long enough to just still keep hanging out with Caspid.

And safe face. Have some respect. You know, she just wants to stay in long enough to not be a disgrace. Well, and not upset her mom. Right. And plus she's eating. She's getting food. There is a level of entitlement there that she just is turned off my.

That's what it is, Kim. He's entitled. And he comes up to her and he thinks he can ask her how her sexual training is going. And every other girl offers make out with him day one. Give him sexual favors. And she's having none of it. She's like, none of your business. We don't even know each other.

The rest of these girls are slutty. Well, they just want to be the queen. He likes this. He is amused by her spirit. Nobody stands up to him. So they have this exchange in the library and they walk back to the party. And she finds her gay best friend, Gabriel, who I love. The favoritest character.

It's like her drinking buddy. kind of her only friend. They go to the pub together and he works in like the kitchen of the palace. And he sleeps with the stable boys. All of them. I love them. Yes. He's juggling many stable boys. Yeah, he is very aggressive. So Gabriel tells her there's about to be a surprise elimination. And Tim's a little nervous about it because. Yeah, he wasn't meant to happen. Yeah, well, that and she just had this exchange with Leo that she's not sure how he took it. Contentious. And so they trapes. all these girls up on the stage. This was gross.

It was so demeaning. Anyway, Leo leans next to the two girls on either side of Tim and says, sorry, darling. And they're dismissed. They're out of the competition. The girls run off the stage bawling. And Tim is like, oh my gosh. And he purposely picked those two girls, I think, to make her nervous.

It could have been you. Oh, for sure. Then they'd say they're going to rank the girls in order of beauty. So the girls traips off the stage and then they set up these podiums. And like the most beautiful one is on one side and the least beautifuls on the other. Well, Leo puts Tim in last place. And it pisses her off. But he doesn't very dramatically.

He's toying with her. Oh, totally. He's testing his power here with her. After the competition, she runs after him. And she's like, what the hell, Leo? Why did you put me in last? He's like, hey, it doesn't really seem like you want to. to be here. She's like, do you want me to be here? And Leo looks at her very hungrily and says, yes. And Tim

says, then act like it. So I'll say she's got his attention. Their relationship is very hot and full. She plays with him a lot. She plays with him, but he plays with her right back. And it is actually quite equal, I think. Their relationship, it's kind of fun. I like it. I didn't feel like this was equal on their side. Oh, I disagree. And I didn't feel like it. Caspin were equal. I felt like he had the upper hand with her and she had the upper hand with Leo. I definitely think she ran Leo. And that was true at the beginning of the book, but as you look at the relationship between her and Caspin, she started to get more of the control as you were finishing. And then as well as Leo, he like released all of his bravado and became real with her.

Here are these guys that had the upper hand at the beginning of the book. And now she's ending with both of these guys in her hand. Agreed. 100% agree. It's a journey. The next night in the caves, Caspin teaches Tim how to kiss. And it's really steamy. And you can tell he's falling for her, but she wants to have sex and he says she's not ready. He puts her off forever. Yes. Long time.

We start like with this game of cat and mouse with Caspin and Tim. And it goes on a little too long. And I think it's because he knows he's got feelings for her and he doesn't know what to do with them. He's getting more distant. He's not staying with her while she eats. and Tim's getting real sick of it. So the next night when she comes for the hand job lesson, she's like, I'm not doing that anymore. I've mastered the skill.

She's a quick study. My sex class, I have graduated. If you're not going to have sex with me, I'd like to snuggle and talk tonight. And he was like, okay, sure. He does end up giving her an orgasm just by blowing on her nipple. That sounds lovely. How, how, how, how. I want it.

That is not real. I know that this is fantasy, but come on. I want it. days. Send us your stories. Is this possible? Anyway, Tim says to Caspin that night, I hate how much control you have over me. And Caspin says, of the two of us, I am not the one with the power, Tim. This is foreshadowing. Love this line. Because you're right, Amy. Like eventually, you realize how much he really loves her and how much she holds the keys. And how long he's loved her. Yeah. So it's time for the next round of bread to be eliminations. And this one will

be based on a kiss. So that training was very timely. When Tim gets to the castle, Leo is sitting at a table with his arm around the blonde that he put in first place at the last elimination. Tim just rolls her eyes. She's just so sick of his entitlement. She wants his attention, but she's kind of over him at the same time. She's a tease. She's a tease, but he's a tease. Like, yeah, they're equally matched in this regard. He's just a whore. Yeah. He's like making no bones about it. He's just a guy. He's only doing it to get her attention. He absolutely is. So one thing that is important to note is that both times that Tim has been in the castle, she hears someone calling for help in her mind. And that's important later and we'll come back.

Very. Leo finds Tim and they have another verbal sparring match and Leo's trying, but Tim is annoyed that he was all over this other girl. She was a little bit jealous. She didn't like it. They keep bickering, but there is definitely some sexual tension. And Leo says, you know we're meant to kiss tonight, right? And Tim says she knows, but she really doesn't want to. And Leo's laughing and he goes, yeah, okay, sure, whatever. Come find me when you're ready. Tim runs into Vera.

And Vera is this bitchy baker's daughter who is always nasty to Tim, has always made fun of her, is kind of her bully. And she's like the town darling. Everyone just thinks she's amazing. And she's the favorite. Like, everybody thinks she's going to get the king's hand. Because she sleeps with everyone. She's the village.

Yeah, but I don't think the village knows that she's a village horror, but she definitely is. She was going down on the boyfriend in the church. I think they do know. Do you? I think that it's okay. That's the perception of how you should be. I did not get that.

I did. For the women in this town, their sexual ability and prowess is their currency. That's all they've got. And back then, I mean, that might have been pretty accurate. Back then, it was like a Puritan society. You weren't allowed to have sex before marriage.

I know, but women had no power. The only thing they had was their looks and how they could make a man happen. Yeah, not like now where we're in power all over the place. I have powers. Don't you doubt me. I have power. So Vera tells Tim, oh, my ache and back. Like, I'm so much sex in the caves.

I'm just so exhausted. And Tim's because Caspin hasn't had sex with her yet. He's avoiding having sex with her, obviously avoiding it. Tim is so mad at Caspin that she marches off to find Leo, grabs his face and starts kissing him. And the kiss is good. The kiss goes well. She likes it. He likes it. Everybody likes it. It's a good kiss. It's steamy. And Leo whispers against her lips. That wasn't so bad, was it? You're just starting to realize like, oh, he's a contender too. It's cute. I like Leo. The hardest part about this whole book was I was rooting for both couples at

the same time. I know. I couldn't figure out who I wanted to go for. He became so sweet. was endearing. He was because he was just a kid. He takes Tim's hand and puts her in first place on the podium stage and eliminates the blonde that he picked first last time. Also, I did, we mention how demeaning this is. I just want to make sure. We did. Yes. Let's say it a few more time. No power. It is very demeaning. But this does lock in that Tim will have a one-on-one date with Leo because that's your prize for being first. And Vera is seething. Oh, yes. Vera knows this whole time that the Prince has his eyes on Tim. So she goes home. Her mom's super proud of her. So Tim's got a lot of pressure on her because if she wins the prince, they're out of poverty. Yeah. There's a lot riding on this for her,

and she's got a lot of pressure around that too. So Leo has an expensive, but kind of slutty, not kind of, very slutty dress delivered to Tim. And she wears it, but she's really annoyed that he's making her race. And uncomfortable. She's uncomfortable. And she shows up and he introduces her to his family, like the whole royal family is hanging out in the lobby. It's like a family dinner. Or like a cocktail party. Awkward. And she's wearing a slutty gown. The dad is like giving her evil eyes. Just steam coming out of his ear. The king does not like her, not a little bit. Not her family, not anything about her. And it's basically like you cannot pick this girl. But Leo hates the king, his dad. So he's even more drawn to Tim because it pisses his dad off.

It's supposed to be his choice. And are we really going to talk about Casp instead? Well, we haven't gotten there. Yeah. Oh, we're going to get to him. Okay. So the sister Lily runs up, hugs her, but then, like we said, the dad is a total asshole to her.

And the first thing he says to Leo is I thought you said she was pretty. That was so messed up. I was like, what a tick. All the things. You can't you just, you can picture yourself in that moment. Yeah. Somebody that's supposed to appreciate their opinion, says something like that to you. every girl can picture themselves in that situation.

She can't do anything. No. He's in power. Like, yeah, she has to take it. Class-wise, everything. It was really horrible. Leo takes Tim away from this cocktail party to the second part of their date, which is a private dinner on the terrace, just the two of them.

And they have a really good conversation. They're getting to know each other and you can tell the prince is growing on her. And he tries to give her jewelry and Tim won't take it because she doesn't want to look like she can be bought. And I don't think any other girl in this competition would have turned down jewelry from the print. No, absolutely not. She's standing out to him and surprising him. So he ends the date by saying, I'm not going to kiss you because then I'll want to have sex with you. And I know you're going to say no.

He leaves her at the door, but she overhears him arguing with his dad. And the dad is telling him, you cannot choose a chicken farmer's daughter. As a wife, he says he will choose who we want. And his dad isn't going to get in the way of his heart again, which is interesting. For a shadow. So Tim goes to the caves the next night. She goes down on Caspin and it's so intense that he turns into a snake. Like he just can't control.

Big snake. He's fighting it. He's on his way to Snake Town. Snake Town. Snake Town. Okay, so the writing is good. Totally. But I'm having a hard time picturing.

When he turns into a snake, is he like a snake snake or does he have arms and still has a penis? I was having a hard time like visualizing what he looked like. I almost Googled how snakes have sex because I just was like, do they have a penis? Well, they have sucked. But I didn't because I don't want that algorithm happening. No. I'll do it.

Incognito mode. I'll do it. My phone's used to me. I'll do it. In this particular instance. He didn't all the way turn. He got scaly. He got scaly.

And he said, like, look away, look away. You have to dispend with reality in these situations. Oh, Lindsay says this in every episode. There's a lot of suspense with reality in this book. Yeah. Oh, especially this book you do. So as he's turning into a snake, he's yelling at her to leave. Because if you'll remember, if she looks at him in snake form, she could turn to stone.

She won't leave. And he gets really mad at her. I think she, like, closes her eyes. but he gets angry at her after because she could have been killed. And she's like, but I wasn't. You know, what's a big deal? I knew you wouldn't hurt me and I was safe. He sends her home.

He doesn't walk her out for the first time ever. This whole time where she can hear him in her head, she can't send messages to his head. That's bothering her. In this moment, she's trying really hard and she breaks down that wall between them. And she screams out like, Cass Ben. And he's like, you don't have to, yeah. I've been here the whole time.

Yeah, it breaks down their communication. This part's important because now they can communicate back and forth in their minds. At the time, we're attributing this to the claw that she's still wearing in her vagina throughout this entire time. Yeah. Yeah. So the next day Tim's invited to the castle for a dinner with the last nine contestants. Prince Leo sends her three dresses to choose from because the last time he sent her the slutty dress, she was like, I would have liked to have chosen a dress for myself. She was annoyed.

And he was listening. He's actually kind of sensitive. He sent her a slutty dress, like a cute dress, and then a nun dress. And, of course, she wears the nun dress. Just to annoy him. As she should. So when Tim gets to the castle, she is stuck talking to Vera, who is just wretched. And she informs Tim that tonight is the frisky 60.

Each girl will get 60 seconds alone with the prince, and they are expected to take their clothes off. Vera says her snake told her all about it, and Tim is annoyed because Kaspen did not warm. her about the Friskees. He's kind of being cagey with her. She starts a mental conversation with Caspin and basically says if she gets naked in front of the prince, he's going to see her claw. And he's like, are you going to do that? She's like, maybe she gets really frustrated with him and tells him to disappear the claw, which he does. Then Tim's the last one to go in to see Leo for the Frisky 60. And he's like hammered and he's covered in lipstick and his shirt's undefiored. And his shirt's done and his pants are undone.

Rose, rose. Just sleazy, right? But she's like, he kind of looks good with his shirt unbuttoned and he's got that nice bulge in his pants. She's like really disgusted by him, but she's also like, meow. She does her normal, hard to get routine with him and it's working. But they finally kiss and he gets a hand up her skirt for like a brief moment. Tim asks if he's going to keep her around and he says, as long as you will let me.

And Tim goes home smelling like the prince, still mad at Caspin, and decides not to shower because she likes the smell so much. Now she likes them both, and she doesn't know what to do with that. She's in a pickle here. She's feeling a bit empty without the clock. Well, I imagine if you've had it up there for a week or so. Well, Caspin won't talk to her now, so she feels like her connection to him has been broken. He will do this to her throughout the book. I hated that.

It's manipulative. It was really infuriating. That's one of the reasons you lean towards the prince because he is like raw emotion. And Caspens a little manipulative. Well, he's 300 something years old. Yeah, there's an age gap. A little bit. I think he's also protecting himself too.

He knows the hurdles they have to jump. He knows that he's meant to be training her for the prince. I do think he's torn. He's an expert brooder, for sure. But that's so sexy sometimes. I mean, it is sexy. I don't know about a snake guy, but it is sexy normally. She wrote this guy pretty sexy.

see what I'd do them. Yeah. Check out Pinterest. Miao. Oh, yeah. The fan. Like the band-packs. Woo! So Tim helps the townspeople set up for a festival, and on her walk home, she is attacked by two boys. Jonathan and Christopher. And one of these is the boyfriend of Vera. Vera's ex-boyfriend, yes. He actually tries to rape Tim. They tear her dress, and he gropes her really aggressively to the point that he leaves bruises, he takes his pants off and when he gets close, Tim knees him in the balls and runs to the caves. When she walks into Caspin's cave, it's pitch dark, and he realizes she's been assaulted, and he makes her tell him the names of the boys that did it. He heals her bruises and gives her a shirt to wear, and he takes her back to his living quarters, pours her a glass of wine, and she's

asking him a lot of basilist questions, and he's, like, very amused. Let's cut to the chase. They finally have sex. The night she almost gets raped, they finally have sex. Makes sense. They trauma bond. Fine. The sexin's your sexen. I will say that we spent a lot of time wondering if she was going to fit all of him in. He was telling her, you know, you just got to will it to happen. He's a good coach. Yeah, yeah, very positive. Every other scene. Every other scene. in this book will now be sex between Caspin and Tim. I was fine with it.

There's a lot of it. I did the audiobook. It was 24 hours. And I feel like maybe probably 22 of that was sex. Yeah. There was a lot of sex. I don't hate that.

The premise of the book was to train her. I'm not hating it. It's the spiciest one that I've read. A lot of bookgasms. A couple of like obnoxious ostentations. Bookasms on the left.

Later that night, though, Caspin sneaks into town and murders Christian and Jonathan by turning them into stone in the middle of the town square. This is a big deal because it breaks the peace treaty and now the town is uneasy and he's basically thrown a gauntlet. He's opened up old wounds. They were to stay outside of town, trade in the harems. They thought they were safe. They had these rows of mirrors and all this stuff that they thought were keeping the basilics out and they had no effect. So all this time, they've kind of laid dormant and played by the rules despite the fact that they could just take them out any minute.

On the next visit to the castle, though, the basilists are asked to join their students and they all meet with the prince in pairs to tell them how well the sex training is going. It's just like so weird. It's very bizarre. She's a great whore. She gives a great blowjob. What does that conversation like? Sex is iffy. We're working on technique, but.

She took all of me. That's like, it's weird. Yeah. There's a lot there. Didn't even blame. Here's her report card. There's blowjob. There's missionary.

But the king opens with the toast. This is right after the stone statue situation with Christopher and Jonathan. And he basically calls the basilisk servants. He's putting them in their place on purpose. Trying. All the basilists are kind of bristling, right? They don't love it. But when Leo meets with Casman and Tim, he realizes they have.

feelings for each other. And he asked Tim if she loves Caspin and she denies it, but he knows she's lying. He asks, am I going to have to share you? Which is it the response you think you're going to hear? That was interesting. You think it's like, oh, you love someone else. You're gone. And it's like, I still won't let you go. Right. This book is long and windy. And there's a lot of count and mouse going on in this love triangle. And we are going to have a lot of chapters where Tim and Caspin's love grows stronger, while Tim keeps Leo on the hook and eventually starts to care for him as well. I thought it'd be easiest if I summarized some of our main plot points. By all means.

This will probably already be a supersized episode, but I'm going to try to keep it from being five hours long. Plot point number one is that the gold necklace that Kaspen gave Tim is a symbol of intent. He would like them to be engaged. And he didn't actually ask Tim, but she's interested. The only way for them to be engaged is to get approval from the quiver, which is Caspin's like community. That's all the snakes that live in his, I guess, hive. Nests?

Hyve. Ness? I think it's a nest? Ness. But we'll come back to this ritual in just a minute. Most importantly, the necklace ties them to each other. And it's called a blood bond. So if one of them dies, the other dies as well.

And the Caspin didn't ask her. And he's going to do a lot of things like this without asking Tim first. And this is a pretty big one. Plot point number two, Caspin is the son of the king of the basilisk. So he is also a prince. There is a rebellion building between the basilists and the humans. And Caspin's dad is driving it, but with malintent, he's a bad dude. Both kings are bad.

They both suck. Plot point number three, Tim is half basilisk. Her mom also fell in love with the basilisk. And that is how Tim came along. Caspin will eventually teach her how to turn into a snake and use her power. So that is part of the story. Her mom was born in the year of a prince and also got trained by a basilis. Just why Tim is half basilisk.

I was wondering if there was something there when Tim was going to the caves for the first time. And she asked her mom, how was your experience? And her mom said life changing. And it was like, hmm, I wonder what that's all about. I also wonder her mom would have been around the same time the king was looking. Yeah, I think you're right. For a queen. And I'm wondering if he was pissed that she chose the basil.

We do find out in the end that he was. Yeah, he was. The king. It turns out he was the prince when Tim's mom went through the ritual. There is an evil villain in the story called Roe. He is angry with Caspin because Caspin killed his father by cresting him. we're going to talk a lot about cresting. It's a whole other thing.

This becomes a major activity. This is like three books long, by the way. Yes, this is long. That's why you're getting a supersized episode. Cresting is a mind control method that if done from snake to snake, it will kill them. But if done from snake to human, it will just create an everlasting mind control. And Roe wants to crest him to get revenge on Caspin. So he's always creeping around and trying to get her alone.

And the only way to prevent being crested is to swallow a basilisk's venom, which Tim involuntarily does when Caspin tells her to open her mouth during sex and he spits gooey black tar down her throat. That tastes like smoke. She's a little pissed about that. I would be too. Understandably so. He sort of drugs her without her consent. Without telling her what it means or what it does. He does this a lot.

A lot. But he does it to protect her just without telling her. Doesn't matter. Still wrong. He needs training. He's hundreds of years old. He's doing what he's doing. He does dumb shit.

Another plot point is that there are basilists being kept prisoner in a dungeon at the castle. And the humans are taking their blood and alchemizing it into gold. So this is another just been reality thing. Tim hears their cries for help. Like I said, when she's in the castle. and her dad is one of the prisoners. And let's talk about Theo's teeth. They're all gold.

Well, they have incisors that are gold. They like have caps. Yeah. It was like a little sparkle on the side. Yeah, gross. She's half basilisk. That's why she was able to hear her dad. The calls from the dungeon and especially her dad.

Now she's kind of on a mission to try to find him. And finally, Leo was in love with a fisherman's daughter. named Evelyn, and his father hated her. They were supposed to run away together, but Evelyn didn't show up at the meeting place, and Leo thinks his father did something to make her disappear. He ends up telling Tim about Evelyn, and I think this is why he's more understanding of the fact that she's in love with Caspin as well as him, because he's kind of still holding, yeah, part of his heart is still with Evelyn, but he also loves Tim. This is kind of threaded three. throughout the book, the Evelyn story comes back a few times.

It really humanizes him, though, because he kind of comes off as this like douchebag entitled figure. Yeah, at first. But he's still going to their meeting spot every morning to wait for Evelyn. Yeah. She says, I'm going to meet you here at the bench at the top of the hill. So every morning he goes to the bench at the top of the hill hoping she's going to show up, even while he's courting him. So he is 100% still in love with someone else. Let's get back to the ritual of how. Oh, Tim and Caspin get engaged. Okay. Caspin tells Tim if she would like to be engaged, if she would agree to, she would have to have sex with his father to gain his approval.

And then the quiver would agree to it from there. So after leading Leo on a little more and playing some games with him, Tim says to Caspin, you know what, I'll do it. So Caspin says, oh, Tim, if you're sure, you're sure, I'll go ahead and book the auditorium. And Tim's like, what? What? What? What? What did that come again?

auditorium. And Casman's like, oh, I didn't mention you're going to be on stage in the middle of an arena and hundreds of basilists will be watching us. Of naked. Then when you're done with dad, you'll have sex with me and then we go to a honeymoon suite. For 24 hours. For 24 hours where people swing by to watch it at their leash. And does tomorrow work for you? She's like, sir, why not? What the hell is? She struggles a little. Of course. Not long enough. She goes back and for it. She's not like, can't wait for this completely ridiculous scenario.

She's like, you know what? This is the only way I can be with him. And so off to the auditorium we go. She's in love. She's willing to sacrifice for her love. So weird. No, we put the dad. I was like not expecting this.

And I was like, what the hell am I reading? Right now, I like, right at this point in the book, I'm like, what is this? I'm still like super enthralled. This is when you thought that? I mean, the whole book is like a little unhinged. I told Kim about this scene and that's why she's like, we're doing it for the show. That's the only reason I read the book. I was like, what?

I need to know more. Jim was like, there is a 300 person orgasm in a stadium. Don't you want to read it? And we were like, well, I wonder how they got there. I don't even care. I want to know. Say less. Let's read this book.

So, okay, so off we go to the auditorium the next morning. The basilists are piling in for the show. They're all naked, by the way. They just don't bother to wear clothes because why would you? They don't really care about clothes in the real, like natural state. They're snakes. Yeah. Also, they're all beautiful.

Sure. Human form is perfect. Snaky humans are pretty. So Caspin's dad, the serpent king, Bastion, comes in, and he climbs into this giant statue of Cora. Now, we haven't talked about Cora, but that is the goddess that they worship in the story. When they go to church, they're worshiping Cora. She is the goddess of fertility, and she is very important in their culture. In this statue, he's leaning into her hands.

Isn't the altar the hands? The altar is Cora's hands held out. And that's where they have sex in the hands. Tim realizes she's kind of turned on, like she's kind of ready to do this. She's into it. And he has to finish. Yes, and quickly. Yeah.

She's got to do it good. That's part of the ritual. If he doesn't finish quickly, he won't give his permission for her to marry his son. But there's a little side plot here about the mind reading. And side plot like dad is bigger than his son. I mean, we've read a lot of father of the boyfriend books. Yeah. Yeah, that's usually the way it goes.

So she, part of the rules is that she has to be on top. So she climbs on and it's going well. She can tell he's getting close because of all our training with Caspin. He's holding out on her, though, and Tim feels him in her mind, tell her you first. So again, with the you first. Yeah. So then she goes first, and then the king pulls out and jizzes all over her legs so everyone can see the proof. Again, more jizze.

They got to see that, you know, she made it happen. And then Caspin's there right away, like, hey, my turn. Yeah. Oh, no, but first he's like, good job. Yeah, he's like, nice work. Him and his dad have a mind argument. They fist bomb. And then Caspin and Tim have sex, and it is supposed to be a quickie, per the rules.

But it's still so hot that the quiver starts getting hissy. And the hisses start getting like really loud. Caspin finishes in his hand and rubs it down Tim's leg. Poor Tim needs a shower at this point. But the hissing is getting louder and louder. And everyone in the audience starts having sex. It was like a massive orgy. 300 person strong.

Yeah. Hundreds of people are there. And Casman's like, you've got to get out of here now. They're all about to transition. And then it's too late. And so he's like, just cover your eyes because he's about to transition too. And apparently it's called a hive orgy. The entire room. We did some research. Like we weren't sure. Is it a nest orgy, a hive orgy? A corny. Big groups of snakes. Yeah. A hive orgy. It doesn't happen very often. It's a horgy. A horgy? A snorgy? A snorgy?

The ass is silent. It's a horgy. But it doesn't happen very often. And so the town is special. Very, of course she is. Now it's over. Caspin takes her to the honeymoon suite. They have hours and hours of sex.

And at first it's great. Which is still being watched. Like people are walking through to watch them. It's like a deep show. Yeah, it's like the zoo. But they must have 24 hours worth of sex. Nonstop. She is like passing out.

People just keep walking through the room. Sure. No big deal. Like we're just going to check it on you guys. And some of them want to touch her. They just think she's so interesting. Anyway, he does end up breaking her pelvis. He breaks her bones.

He broke her. Roe shouldn't have been there because Roe is from a different hive. This guy. He was not invited to this party, but he showed up anyway. He comes to the honeymoon zoo or whatever we're going to call this. Yeah. Yeah. Snorgy.

He's like, I hope he breaks you. He's just a nasty human. I mean, he did kill his dad. We, no, he, Ro has a right to be mad at Kaspen. Like, that's fair. He killed him because his dad asked him to do it. It was strategic. No, it was shitty.

Yeah, no. Ro is on the right side of history here at this point, but then he isn't. So Caspin carries her back to his room and he'll be. her and then they have sex again. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? I'm like, girl, just relax a little bit. Aren't she burning? She's like, aren't you like?

He's like, I don't want to do this to her. She's like, do it. I mean, she just is insatiable. It's just like, what? He broke your fucking pelvis. Like, take a minute. She doesn't feel it anymore. She's fine.

He fixed her. Yeah. I don't know, you guys. Just seems like a lot, though. I'm going to do it is a lot. The next morning is when Tim finds out she's high breed. They call it a high breed. And she's half basalist. When Caspin's dad said you first in her mind, he confirmed it. He knew she was a basilist too. You can't talk to people like that unless you're a

basilisk, which means Caspin fucking knew this whole time. A whole time. I did. And didn't tell her. Bastian, the dad, wants Tim to agree to marry Leo and crest everyone at the wedding so the basilists can take over. Caspin feels like it's too dangerous, and he's being cagey as usual. So Tim runs home and confronts her mom. So she finds out all in one day, I'm a basilisk. She finds out what cresting is. They want me to crest the royal party.

They're trying to use me in this royal bachelor situation. And so then she runs home and she's like, mom, is this for real? And the mom's like, yeah, sorry I didn't tell you. Yeah. Mom. Damn, I didn't think he found out. She probably should have mentioned that. Her normal habit when she's mad at Casman, she goes to find Leo.

So she goes to the garden where he sits every morning waiting to see if Evelyn's going to show up. And he's there and he's so happy to see her. And he's like, please spend the day with me. By the way, Tim's exhausted. Tim has been having sex for 24 hours straight. She hasn't had a wink of sleep. She's been on an emotional roller coaster. With the dad and the sun.

She's been all over the place. Yes. They have a great day together. She ends up, like, taking a nap on his couch while he, like, reads her story. Their bond is very sweet. Yeah. And it's very much, like, 20-year-olds. It's wholesome.

Yeah. As opposed to what she's got with Caspeth. So Tim heads back to the caves that night because she's expected for a council meeting. This meeting was weird. And the things they put her through, like, I can't. But, I mean, she's down for it, though. She's like, oh, okay, I'll sit on your naked lap in the middle of the thing. The entire meeting, she's sitting on Kasman's lap.

And he's... They're all naked. They're all naked. Well, it's a power play. Using her. She's here for it. Like, he's using her with her permission. But she doesn't know until after that he gets power from that.

That's why. So the council gives their approval for Tim to be engaged. And they ask if she'll perform a crest on the royal family at the wedding. And Tim says, look, I'll only do it if Lily. and her kids are spared as well as Leo. So she knows. She's bargaining. If she doesn't agree to this, they're going to kill the royal family.

Right. So she feels like this is the most peaceful way to get Leo through this situation. She also feels like the royal family kind of fucking sucks. And so she only really likes Leo, his sister, and her kids. So she's like, she's saving who she can. Right. And she's doing it in a way that's going to save him. So they push back.

and Caspin and her have sex at the table. This is where you were losing me a little bit. A little bit. Apparently, the sex gives Caspin power of manipulation. Anyway, they take another vote and everyone says yes to the agreement. It's okay to save Leo and the sister and the kids and the engagements on and let's all carry on. It's like a shiny object. No, no, no, no, no.

Look at this pretty object over here. You want to vote for this. The sex gives him power of manipulation. Yeah, it's like a pheromone kind of thing that pulls people in and makes them do what he wants them to do. That wasn't even the weirdest part of this deal. Okay? No. The part that got really weird was when it was time for everyone to leave the meeting.

And they all had to kiss her on her clitoris. That was weird. Oh, right. Yeah, they're like, you know, the kiss of the basilisk, but not on the mouth. It made me uncomfortable, be honest with you. It was like, what? It's like an assembly line of... It's like kissing the ring, but it's our clitoris.

Like, what? The tors. Why would you say it like that? That's what bad is notorious. How do you say it? Sorry, I can't. All right then. Even more awkward, though, is that Roe is the last one to kiss her.

And he hates her. He hates her. He makes a face after he does it. So Caspin makes him finish her off. bring her to orgasm. And he pretty much humiliates Roe in front of the entire council, which is a bad idea. And Roe finishes out of shame. Oh, yeah, he makes him finish too. It was humiliating. For both of them, I think. Yeah, I didn't like Caspin in this moment. There's a lot of moments. He was trying to get a one-up on his enemy. But using her to do it. Again. Tem is like, this was hot. Tim didn't seem to mind.

Yeah, that was weird. But Roe definitely minded. And that I came back to haunt them. Because of this, Roe corners Tim the next day and tries to crest her. It's really cruel because once you're crested to somebody, you do whatever they want and you're in love with them and you're at their will. So to do that to someone's fiancé is really horrible. But he isn't able to crest her because of the black venom goop that Kasman spit into her mouth. When Kaspen finds out that he did this, he cuts off Rose Dink. as he should, which for a basilisk is the worst thing you can do because they're so sexual. Also, he's a trainer in the bachelor.

That did not bother me one bit. This guy was awful. He was sneaky for lack of better. He was just nasty from the kid. He had every right to be. Don't get me wrong. Like you said, Jen, he was on the right side of his, even still. He was just gross in the shadows and dark.

He was icky and I did not like him at all. He took a political. situation and made it very personal. Right. Right. I think that's why it was easy to hate him. But because Caspin cut his dick off and he's kind of mad about it, he retaliates with an attack on both of them, like almost killing Caspin. So this is where it's getting really windy and hang in there with me. But because of this situation, Caspin trusts Tim so that he can survive. That's the only way in this battle. She asks him to do it to save him. Yes.

And the good news is he doesn't get mind control of her. But the bad news is she's half and half, right? So he ends up cresting the basilisk side of her. When a basilisk crests a basilisk, you kill them. Tim starts slowly dying without realizing it because our human side's just fine. Yeah. Because of their blood oath, which means if one of them dies, the other one dies, Caspin starts fading as well.

Meanwhile, on The Bachelor. Tim is in the top three girls. Back to the Castle. Forgot about The Bachelor. Good Lord. We're in the race to the throne, which means Tim is moving into the castle with Vera, of course,

and then one other random girl, but I don't even think we learned her name. Which was always part of the deal when you make it to the top three. It's like the Honeyman Suites on the Bachelor. Tim continues to lead Leo on while sneaking out to see Casman at night. Leo eliminates the random girl that we don't know

and then comes to tell Tim he's like so excited to tell her Tim, you're in. I eliminated her. She's covered in dirt. He realized she just climbed in the window and he's like, oh my God, you've been out to see Caswell. How could you do this to me? And he's really upset because Tim basically said to him,

if you don't eliminate those girls, I don't believe that you're interested in me. And he did it. Now it's just Tim and Vera. He's very rightfully pissed off. And Tim decides it's time to tell him the truth and takes him to the dungeon and shows him the basilist bloodletting. She's like, I got to just show him all my cards. I'm going to show him what his dad's doing and see how he reacts.

That is a big part of this, right? I know the king's doing something wrong. He has my dad. I need to get into the castle to save my dad. So as much as she's playing the two guys against each other, she's also there to save the day. There's a lot of things that play in this book in various things. There is it one character, not one character that is not manipulating someone else in this book. That's a good point. That's what makes it kind of interesting. It's like you don't know who's playing who and who's going to come out on top and who she's going to fall in love with and who's going to save the dad. And it does keep you very engaged.

The good thing is Leo doesn't like this. He sees it and he's like this is barbaric. But she didn't know what he would do because the dad was fairly certain he would fall in line just like all the legacy before him. Well, that's how they got rich. This was pretty intimidating for her to take him down there and just kind of cards on the table. Putting it all on the line. She's telling him the whole truth about her, about her dad. I hope you're the guy that I think you are. But if you're not, what do I do? And the good thing, he's that guy.

He's the good guy. He was that guy. He agrees to help. And Tim finally sleeps with his for me. Oh, my gosh. There's a long time coming. He's not hard up or anything because Vera's 590 pages worth. Whatever.

Ever. He's been sleeping with all the other girls. She might want to get him tested. He doesn't have a torch for her. He likes her, but he's taken advantage of the situation. Well, and enjoying her torment. Yeah. And I'm going like, finally. We're supposed to root for her and Caspin. But I'm really glad that she gave him a piece. Yeah. Yeah. Same. I really struggled because I liked the Caspin relationship. That was obviously what you should be rooting for. But I liked Leo. I rooted for Leo. I don't know if it was that obvious. I think that. I think that. That's why I liked this book so much and had you all read it. I lured you in. What did you moved for? You mandiuculated us. That's what you mean you did. I did. I'm also in this game of grounds.

Nick Finn. Tim sets up a meeting between Leo and Caspin, unbeknownst to Caspin. But the two princes meet and they eventually decide between the two of them like, hey, we both hate our dads. Let's decide to rule with peace. And they kind of make an agreement that. we're going to work together. So they get back to the castle and Leo dumps Vera, which was glorious. I loved everything. That girl, like, she could have gone. Oh. So soon. It was time. They decide they're, like, getting married the next day because the basilisk side of Tim is dying and she needs to do this cresting thing while she's still got some powers left. Tim realizes, oh my gosh, well, Leo is kind of vulnerable because he could be crested at the wedding. I mean, the only agreement, is we're not going to kill Leo.

And I'm not going to crest Leo, but anyone could crest Leo. So she wants to protect Leo and decides he needs to drink her venom. So she spits the black tar into a whiskey glass. And he comes in and she's like, hi, honey, lots to do today, can't stay long. But could you just drink this goo? And he's like got questions. And she's like, oh, my God, Leo, just stop asking questions to drink the goo. You're so annoying.

I have a lot to do. Just drink the goo. Got to go, bye. He's like, what is this shit? She will not get them. Busy be. Busy. That's what going on, Leo. Busy. Listen, I'm trying to save your life. So Leo's like, okay. I'll drink the goo. He just drinks it. They head to the wedding and they're going to get married in the middle of this maze. I feel like the maze was like a character in the book. They had this hedge maze. Yeah. Like all big castle has. There's a couple scenes in there. Yeah, it's a very castley. The wedding's getting set up and the guests are arriving in. Caspin's there, but he looks like shit. Because he's dying.

Yeah, she realizes, oh, my gosh, like, I don't have a lot of time here. Caspin's dad gets Tim alone and basically tells her that once she crests the royals, like she's agreed to do, he's going to crest her. He is the only basilisk that is powerful enough to crest anyone he wants. And he's waiting for Tim to do this so he can do that. Because that'll give him the power. She would crest the royals. and then he would take her power. Tim says to the dad, like, hey, if you do that, my basilisk side dies, which kills Caspin.

And he's like, yeah, well, sacrifices have to be made. He does not give a fuck. Yeah, shit happens. Move on. She's realizing how evil this man is. Leo and Caspin come up after the dad walks off and they're like, what do you say? She tells them what he said, and Leo is super confused. He doesn't know what cresting is. And he doesn't know that Tim was planning to crest his family.

And then Caspin's like, he knows our engagement is bloodbound. And Leo's like, hey, wait, you're engaged? Wait, what? And Tim and Caspin are like, oh, my God, Leo, shut up. Like, why are you, like, annoying us right now? We're talking. Poor Leo. It is poor Leo.

They're like in the high-stakes, Mission Impossible situation. And Leo's like, what? We're about to walk down the aisle. you're engaged in another prince. They go round and round, like, do I cross? Do I not cross? What do I do? They don't really come to an agreement.

And then it's time they walk down the aisle. Leo's dad marries them with very little enthusiasm, which is uncomfortable. But then he crowns Leo King. And this is the tradition. As soon as you marry, you're now the new king. And then, like, when he's King, he's King. Whatever he says goes, which is important. But in the meantime, Tim sees these best.

Sneaking around the maze and surrounding the guests like best lists that weren't invited. The only ones that were really invited were the coaches from the sex training. Bastion is in her brain saying, hey, it's time to crest him now, like chop chop. Tim's decides I'm not going to do it. Leo's giving this big speech about peace and he's like really trying to do the right thing. So sweet. So precious. Once Bastion realizes Tim's not going to crust the royal family, he's like, so be it.

and the snakes attack. And it is a freaking bloodbath. They start cresting people. They start turning up to stone. Leo's dad almost knocks them over trying to escape like a coward. As you expect. Yeah. And then Tim and Caspin are like, Leo get to safety. And give like the kids and you have a purpose. Get everybody out of here. Casspin's like, I've got her, I promise. Tim ends up cresting herself, which who knew that you could do that? Okay. That was a plot twist. Okay. Yeah. Like I know you could. do that. Do that sooner. Well, I think they just figured it out.

She heals her basilisk self, which heals Caspin. Winning. And then he is ready for battle. He's fighting off the bad guys. But then Bastion, his dad comes up and tries to crest him. She's fighting him on it. He turns into the snake and starts like eating her. Like he jumps on her shoulder, starts breaking her bones.

Caspin, in the last minute, saves her, right? But then Caspin eats his dad alive? It was very gory. It was a battle scene. It was a battle scene. Tim ends up having to crest Leo in order to heal herself. So the cresting gets a little out of control. A lot of cresting.

But Leo, she crests him. And when you crest somebody, whatever you ask them to do, they're going to do it because they are so enamored with you. They just want to please you. And she crests Leo and then tells him to go find him. to Evelyn. But he's still in love with Tem. Like, it doesn't change his feelings for her, but he's now obligated to go find this other love. They have this very sad goodbye, and it's hurtful to Tim, too. She's miserable. The whole thing is. Yeah, she's like, please say this isn't our last

goodbye, and she's kind of keeping him on the hook, right? As always. Caspin throws his dad's corpse on the lawn, and everyone knows he's the king now. The basilists all slither away and the human. are left with this carnage, and it's just, like, really awful. Flash forward, and Tim wakes up in Bastion's bed. Since they're now the king and the queen, her and Caspin have upgraded their bedroom. Sure. By which is. All right.

Let's take it over. Yeah. Hey, why not? Tim asked Caspin, how do we officially get married? And he says, well, all you have to do is make me a token similar to the necklace I gave you. And she does it, no problem, oh, like through her fingertips. and they get married. That's how simple the ceremony is.

After the engagement ceremony is like a freaking auditorium. All this work. So I'd go into the courthouse. Just sign something. I know. Yeah, just sign something. That's all you had to do. They call each other mine.

They're in bed together and just like living their best life. We flash back to Leo. It's one hour after the wedding ceremony. He takes Tim's mom down to see Tim's dad. These two have not seen each other. since Tim's mom got pregnant. So these two get back together, which is very cute. So we tie up that loose end.

But then he makes his dad tell him where Evelyn is because he has been given this job to do and he wants to make Tim happy. The dad says, I paid her off. She's in the next town over. She was cheap to buy off. I mean, he's saying all these horrible things. All the whole things. Yeah. Leo drives through the night and finds her feeding ducks by the park.

with her golden blonde hair. And he's got this moment where he's like, this is going to change everything. If I engage with her, it's going to change my relationship with Tim. Like, should I do it? Should I do it? And she turns around and says, Leo. And that's how we end it. And Jenny's like, it's not a cliffhanger.

It's only one book. It's going to be fine. Just read this one book. Lindsay, are you sad you've read this book? I enjoyed the book. I was real upset that I didn't have the next book to read. That's kind of her stipulation. Well, like it a month, I guess.

Yeah, November 11. You got to read an amazing book. Yeah. Amazing. And here we are today. We wouldn't be here today. We'll see. We haven't given it our ratings yet.

Amy, guest of honor, you want to start? As far as a read, I'll give it three stars. I thought it was really well written. I thought the plot was a little thin in some point, but it really kept me engaged. The chili spices, I will say this is the spiciest book that I've read. date. So I'll give it a solid five. Oh my gosh. Okay. I would say this book, Stars is a four. I was completely pulled in. And the love triangle and all of the mystery and the dad in the basement and the whole thing.

Like I really could not wait to get it ends. I thought the plot was really fascinating. Spice five shelley peppers. The sucks in this book was really good. I could get over the snake thing. It was very hot. Okay. So for me, I would probably, I'm with you, Lynn. I would give it about a four. There were some plot issues for me. There were too many things being thrown in. But I did love the way it was written.

There were some really good parts and there were some really shitty part. Yeah. But the good ones outweighed the shitty ones. So I would go with a four. I can totally see this provincial town. Yeah. Like, could you just picture the whole town? That's a good writer.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would go five chili peppers. I mean, it was. spicy all the way through and you weren't looking to the next chapter to get something. It was there in your face, every chapter. So I enjoyed it. You didn't have a lot of time in between. No. But the other thing that I like about books like this is that it also didn't feel like you were just stringing

scenes along. Sex to sex to sex. Yeah. No, there was a story. The sex felt very part of the book. That was part of her journey was the sex and growth and manipulation and all these different things. So, yeah. Yeah. I'm growing up. Yeah. Listen, I'm aligned. I was up for on the book. I thought it was really well written.

Obviously, I recommended it to all my friends. Clearly. I just love this time period, too. I love books that are written in this era. Like you said, Lindsay, you could picture the town and the, and they're drinking meat and the pub. It's very beauty and the beast. Yes. Yeah.

It was very fun. And five on spice, no doubt about it. Oh, my God. We all agree on the exact same. This never happens. The three of us never agree on a bump. That's true. We are very got on this one, which is rare.

Interesting. Okay. Well, thank you again, Amy, for joining us. Thank you for happening. This was really fun. Hey, everybody, be sure to find us on TikTok, Insta, Facebook, and YouTube. Check out boozy bookgasms for reading lists, cocktail recipes, and episodes of the show. And until we meet again, happy reading.

Bye. Thanks for tuning in. We hope today's episode was the climax of your day, leaving you breathless and wanting more. Until next time, remember to indulge in the pleasures of life and to keep the passion alive. You can find more tantalizing episodes at boozybookgasms.com. Enjoy the ride.

And we'll see you soon.