Breaking Bread with Tom Papa - Episode 118 - Leanne Morgan Returns

Episode Date: August 16, 2022

The hilarious and lovely Leanne Morgan returns with great stories and diet advice. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hey, it's time for Breaking Bread with Papa. Hey, don't you know? Hey, it's also a show. Hey, everybody, welcome to another edition of Breaking Bread with Tom Papa. I am Tom Papa. Happy day to you. Happy summer to you. Oh, are you feeling like I'm feeling?

Like summer, you can all of a sudden sense that we're kind of rounding. We're coming into the last lap. In a way, a little bit. But I say no. I say, hang on. We've got a lot of great tomatoes popping. Blueberries. Everywhere I go, people are talking about zucchini.

How you're going to cook zucchini? Look, I know zucchini grows like wild, but it's not my favorite. Is it your favorite? Not really. I mean, you really got to jazz it up a lot. But it means that the summer is still in full swing. And I'm still on my big hot dog race. I've been pounding down hot dogs.

I'm not giving up. And it's still summertime is what I'm trying to say. So don't you give up either for crying out loud. I'm happy to be home. I was out for a while. As you know, I was at the Jersey Shore eating a lot of tail of ham and crumb cakes. And I got home and was able to bake some bread. I have to say, and I know I don't care if it's, if I, I,

I know I talk about this a lot, but to come back off the road and be mixing some dough and creating some new bread and passing it off to a couple of friends just in the last couple days that I've been home, I know for a fact that baking all this stuff is going to be a lifelong pursuit because it now is, it's just a part of me. Like I know now that when I am done with this great interview with Leanne Morgan today, that I've got two loaves that are waiting to be baked before I go off and do my shows in Braia, California. I just, it's just a part of the every day, it's part of the rhythm, it's something I completely enjoy, and yeah, it's just, it's no longer a thing that I toy around with, like maybe I'll do this, I just kind of do it.

Ah, it makes me so happy. You know what else makes me happy? happy? Leanne Morgan. We have a great show for you today and I'd like to thank our sponsor. Helix, Helix, Sleep. How long have you had your mattress? How has your sleep improved? This is what the helix people are asking of me because I own a Helix mattress. We've had it about a year now and our sleep has totally improved. I get so happy when I, at the end of the day, roll down stairs and get into my bed. And look, I tour a lot. I stay in a lot of nice hotels. My bed with a Helix Sleep mattress is the most comfortable mattress that I sleep on.

That's it. Helix Sleep is a premium mattress band that provides tailored mattresses based on your unique sleep preferences. They're offering up to $200 off mattresses and two free pillows for our listeners. So go to helixleep.com slash papa. Helix sleep dash helix sleep.com slash p a pa, with Helix. Better sleep starts now. More about my experience a little later in the show. Leanne Morgan is hilarious. You know she has been on our program before and I wanted to bring her back quickly because I just love her. She's so funny. Her act is so controlled. and smooth and truthful. There's no mistake why Leanne Morgan is at once under the radar and blowing up at the same time.

She has this great panty tour out right now. She is touring all over the country. She's in the middle of, I think it's a hundred city tour that she's involved in right now. She's just killing it, playing all of it. of these great theaters, you really got to go check her out live. And you'll know, I mean, hopefully you listen to the first time she was on because she's so damn funny. She's just naturally, naturally funny. The big panty tour, you can go to Leanne Morgan.com and look up all of her dates. She is everywhere. I was lucky enough to have her, uh, spend a little time with me before

her show in Davenport, Iowa. By the time this comes out, that will be over, but she's everywhere. She's going to Little Rock. She's going to Alabama, Huntsville, Bowling Green. She's got this, she's just amazing. You're really going to love her. And let's plug this one at the end of the year, December 8th at the Encore Theater at the Wynn in Las Vegas, which you know I play and is such a great place to go. And she is super, super funny. I love Leanne Morgan. I can't wait to share this conversation. We had a lot. lot of laughs. So let's just jump right in. Leanne Morgan, enjoy. Oh, it's so nice to see you again. So good to be with you, Tom. When I heard about this, I really enthraling my heart beat out of my body and I felt like I was being invited to the prom. I really did.

You know I'm so tingle with you. Likewise. I'm your biggest plan. I mean, let's be honest here. I don't think we're talking out of school when I say this, but you're one of the, I think you're the quickest return guest from when you were on and then coming back. And that is purely because, and I don't think, I think everyone that listened to our episode was aware of this, that we really hit it off. We did. I felt it. And I thought, oh, my gosh. And I think I told you, if we had been in school together, we would have never gotten a thing done. We would have had a ball.

and we might have even dated. But I don't know. I mean, I would have tried to date you. I would have tried to date you too. You wouldn't have? And I don't think there's anything wrong with saying it's not too late. I mean, I know we both have created these gigantic families and we have husbands and wives. But I would just say, let me just put it out there.

There's still time. Can you imagine me and you in Assists in Living and watching good television shows and eating good food? And I don't know. I mean, I would like to in my 80s smoke cigarettes again. I don't know that may not be your thing. But if we ballroom dance and we, can you imagine how much fun we would have? If you don't like cigarettes, I wouldn't smoke them. I don't smoke now.

I don't like smoking cigarettes myself. I'm not opposed to it. I don't mind a cigar once in a while. I'm just not good at it. I would do it, but I love being around people who do smoke cigarettes. You do? Yeah.

Is there anybody left? No. I just wander up to people like outside the supermarket and stand near them. Do you have anyone in your life? Do you remember that that Stedric, the entertainer did about how no, one's going to be able to smoke on earth because he said it's so sad when you can see people like by a dumpster, you know, shaking in the winter, smoking. He said they're going to finally just make them go to the moon or something to smoke. Yeah, I smoked in the 80s for a little while. I waited

tables and I was at the University of Tennessee and yeah, I did. And I, and there was so many people I think that were so cute that wanted to date me, but I smelled bad. And I, and they didn't want to date me anymore. And I think, man, I lost a lot of opportunity. And then my husband said to my kids the other day, your mom smoked and I hated it. And I go, you stalked me and loved me and bought my cigarettes. He knew what he was doing. I, yeah, I don't, I know it's bad for you and all that, but I don't know. It still looks cool whenever I, and I, like, I literally have never smoked, like, I tried it once when I was a kid. I was walking down the street with my friends. We were like 10 years old, and there was a lit cigarette on the street. And I thought I was cool. I just picked it up,

and I took a drag of it. And it was so horrible. And I was coughing and just sick. It is. It's hard. And it's hard and bad. It is. One time I had to do it in a play when I was in college, and the character smoked. And I practiced. I tried to look like it. but, man, I did not look. There's something about just not being able to hold it right and not inhaling it. It ruined the whole play. Oh, me. What will you smoke?

When we're in the nursing home, what will you smoke? Marlboro lights. Okay. Yeah. And, oh, my gosh, when I look back on that, Tom, I was so lost. And I was trying to look like Madonna. Oh, nice. And I had roots.

and I, you know, black my eyes out and I was, you know, wanted to be difficult. And I was smoking, you know, and that's around the time I met my husband who made straight A's, was getting an MBA and did everything right. And I don't know how he was attracted to me, but I was cute. How are you? Of course you were cute. Why were you attracted to him if he was such a straight and narrow guy? I like security, you know. I like men that have got a 401k.

And I know that sounds terrible because young women would probably go, you can do it on your own and I get that. And I'm tickled. But I wanted to have a bunch of babies. And I wanted, I'm attracted to men and a button down that looks like they can do mass because I can't. And that's really and truly, like I would,

I've dated some long hairs, some boys that were artists and, you know, rode a bicycle and didn't. on a bed, you know, they slept on a floor somewhere. And, and that was fun. But it wasn't, I thought, I can't have a bunch of kids with some ding-dong that's riding a bicycle. You know, put a bunch of kids on a bike. So, yeah, I'm attracted to security. And I think that my, my little daddy, who still live in 81, works like a Trojan. And always, you know, I knew that whatever happened, we were going to be okay.

And my husband's that way. Like, if something goes down, he could go drive a truck. He doesn't, I mean, he's an executive at a company, but he has no ego. He would go and do whatever he had to do to take care of a family. When you're a woman that has a bunch of kids, you know, that's attractive. Yeah. Yeah, no, absolutely. Your dad still works.

What does he do? He's not working anymore, but we still have our farm. He, but my little daddy, let me tell you all that my little daddy did. because I know you love food as much as I do, and we're beef people. So my little mom and daddy have their farm, but somebody else farms it now because they're, you know, somebody leases that nobody actually farms their own land anymore. And then my little mom and daddy had a meat processing plant. So they did everybody's beef and hogs, and we made this sausage that was out of this world, Tom.

And then they would smoke it in a smokehouse. And we did, you know, know, people's bacon, hongs, all that. Wow. And then deer, which my little daddy never hunted a day in his life, but people would bring in their deer and they processed it. And they stayed covered up and busy and they put my sister and out through school doing that.

And then my little daddy on the side to make, to have a pension carried the mail was a rural mail carrier. Whoa. On top of had a business and a farm. Jeez. That's amazing. I know. And he, to this day, I mean, my little mom will make over him and go, your daddy is so lim where he can put his foot up on the kitchen table.

So my little daddy is still in really good shape and goes up to his little building and pittles around. He pittles. He's a piddler now. He's a piddler. So when you were growing up around all of that processing and stuff, did it make you enjoy meat and those meals? more or did it turn you off for a bit? It turned me off. It did.

And I didn't, they opened that when I was in sixth grade. And then, because my dad worked as a butcher, we had, our family had a grocery store in our little bitty town. And so he did, he was doing all that. And that and he realized there was this need that people wanted their nail, you know, that's a huge grass fed beef and get your own, you know, where your food's coming from. Get it. Yeah. Ship tea and all that. Like Tim McGrawls doing.

those ropes and tiny has no body fat. He's eating all that butcher box. Back then, I mean, it's always been a big business, but what was I saying? Oh, so he opened that when I was in sixth grade, and it turned me off and it scared the living day lights out of me because there was, I remember a hog hanging in a freezer, and my sister locked me in with it. So the whole thing was just gross. And they would make us work in it, not much because my sister and I weren't good help,

and we were sissy, but I would wrap hamburger meat. You know, you knew like my mom would find out what a family's, the family of four needed this much in a package. And so we would wrap. And it smelled bad to me and it turned me off. And so I probably, probably was a vegetarian and didn't even realize it from sixth grade until I went to college. And then when I got away from it, it didn't smell it and didn't see it.

Yeah. Then I, um, then I started eating pizza at night and had pepperoni. on it, you know, and started to eat hamburgers and all that again. Right. Slowly came back. Yeah. Yeah. And so now I'm trying to eat a lot of protein because I'm in menopause, Tom, and I don't

want to lose all my muscle mass. So I'm back to eating, you know, some meat. And I know that's hard to say with L.A. people. Right? No, I know. My wife is in the similar position and, but is a vegetarian. And, or a pescatarian, she'll eat some fish now. But I was reading.

an article about how much protein you really need. And I was listening to a podcast about it. And it's, I forget the math behind it, but it's a lot. And she's not getting close to that. And she, her thing is that, but she really, you know, loves animals and doesn't want to do it. And I'm, my thinking always is, I know you love animals, but you love them more than yourself. like you could stop your anemia if you just had one steak but her but she's so dialed in on it that uh and you know i admire it i admire that she's got these this beliefs that she's sticking with but personally if it meant like me being stronger and and and healthier i would i would just run out in a field and tackle it myself well i i love an animal

too. Tell her that I sleep with two bingles in my butt every night when I'm at home and I love a dog and I love I could never hunt or anything like that. But I, you know, I had a podcast that was about menopause and it was called sweaty and pissed menopause more. And we talked, she talked about all that was plant-based diets become a big thing. But when you're going through menopause, if she wants to feel good. She's got to get that protein in. Look at me like I'm a doctor. People think I am because I did that podcast. People ask me at my grocery store, like what I do about my insurance and dominance land. And I'm a comedian, but I tell them. But anyway, if she even got it in a protein powder, you know, if she just drank it. So tell her to feel good and to have lean body mask and not lose that body mask.

Yeah. Because, oh, Tom, I've got to do a photo sheet. At the end of September. And I could rather take a bullet. I mean, I'm just saying, oh, my Lord, because I had beautiful arms and my little daddy would cut that meat and was tiny and skinny and about six, three, and just be cut up like an athlete. And I took after him, my upper body, I can get really cut up and pretty, my arms, but my booty is like my mom and it's fluffy and it never seems to tone. But when I eat protein and I exercise my arms will be pretty. And I'm trying to get them pretty for this photo shoot.

I could just die. End of September, that is? That's end of September. Yes. Yeah. I'm shooting something in October, October 1st. And I was thinking the same thing. Like, I should probably dial it in,

maybe drop 10 pounds before I go to it. And I literally was with my friend talking about this while I was eating a plate of buffalo wings and a corona in the middle of a, Thursday afternoon. I know. Oh, I'm just like you. See, we would have so much fun in a Cicill Landing.

But yeah, if I, now at this point, I'm really just thinking, I hope I don't look inflamed. If I could just like drink water and not look puffy and inflamed. But they sent me this photographer's a big nail and he sent me pictures of people he had done. And I thought, oh, did they tell him who he's stealing with now? You're beautiful. I actually wanted to, I wanted to ask you that. You look so great on stage, but like I know, you know, we travel a lot. We're touring all the time.

You have a great tour. The big panty tour is out now. You're touring all over. People should go see you live 100%. You're playing nonstop harder than I am right now. But my biggest question, you're funny. You can tell jokes. I don't worry about that at all.

What I do worry about is how do you pack these beautiful, elegant, dresses, gowns that you're performing in. I can't even, I'm trying to get two t-shirts into my Marion. How do you do it? I am really trying to dial that in. And I do, thank you. I do love a dress. And I try to get, I got a lot of them that you just wad up, really.

But then, like, I've got two this weekend that I'll have to iron and I push those down in there. But I'm only bringing one pair of shoes. This has been very difficult for me as a woman. because I was bringing all kinds of sandals and doing, and I also bring a lot of exercise clothes thinking. Yeah. I'm going to exercise.

I know. And I always bring them back home and they're clean. It makes me feel terrible about myself. But it has been hard time. And I tell you, I'm really, I'm worried about, you know,

the airlines, all these cancellations and delays and then people losing luggage. I'm like, I'm losing my girdle. I got to have my girdle. I've got to have my makeup. I've got to have my hormones.

My, It's been bio-identical cream. Yeah. So I've been putting it on in a carry-on, and it's been hard. I've really scaled back. You know, when I'm flying, I've got on filthy clothes. Because I just wear the same thing over and over. I do too.

I know. I just wear the same exact thing. I'm like, I used to pack so much more, but then I realize no one's coming near me. So Helix Sleep is a premium mattress company. brand that provides tailored mattresses based on your unique sleep preferences. When they approached me, I think last year at some point, they said take the Helix sleep quiz and tell us what you think. So I took the Helix sleep quiz. We've been on our mattress probably for, I don't know, 10 years because for some reason, even though sleep is

the most important thing, you don't think to change out your mattress. It seems to be like almost like it's moving or something because in the old days to go get a mattress was a big pain in the butt and you had to go to a mattress store and lay on this bed while these creepy salesman like stared at you and you just I don't know I guess it feels okay while I'm in my coat laying on a showroom floor mattress so of course you didn't go and change it up but helix made it so easy so you go online you go to helix sleep.com you take their sleep quiz and all your sleep preferences, whether you like it hard, whether you like it's soft, whether you like to be hot, whether you get hot at night, or you like something cooler. My dog is very excited about this too.

Bella, not now. I'm talking with the Helix sleep people. Put in her doll. My wife sat down next to me. She put in her preferences and they sent us a mattress that made both of us happy and we do not sleep, have the same sleep preferences. But this mattress is so good. we've had it now for a over, I think it's over a year, close to a year. I'd say close to a year.

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dot com slash papa. Why am I having a brain fart of that today? Helix better sleep starts now. Trust me. You need to sleep better. I obviously need to sleep better. I obviously need to sleep. better and I'm happy happy to be home in my Lilic Sleep. I can wear the same shirt for three days in a row. How close am I getting to anyone? That's what I've decided. So I have kind of a uniform and I go home and I wash it and I put it right back on. I know how cold I'm going to get on the airport in the airport

and I wear the same black and white and the tennis shoes, you know, that I know if I do get on a treadmill, which I did this morning, then I know I've got my tennis shoes. yes and then I've got my heels for tonight and I've got a good minimizing bra that that I carry every weight because my I'll just say my breasts Tom have just gotten out of control it's awful that's another menopauseant plane they were huge and I think I all I see is like these huge baseball I mean basketball looking size and I got to bring those down because it just make me look like a big old gal, you know?

I don't know. I didn't have them. Now, I'm like, oh, my Lord. I just, I think, I've seen myself in a reflection in a window, like, you know, at a Home Depot or something. I think, bless her heart. And then I think, it's me. That was me. Yeah, but you know what?

I, I, you look amazing. Thank you. And the amount of work and dedication, like the amount of getting on the treadmill and the worrying about how you look and putting on the bra and not eating a thing after the show. And how much does that really change us? You know what I mean? Like to us, it's a huge deal. But to the people in the audience, you're you. Like it doesn't, you would have to double in size for people to notice.

You know what I mean? Well, thank you. And see, that's me being buying. And through this whole, you know, I'm 56 years old, about to turn 57. And I started doing comedy 22 years. And in my mind, which is crazy. But I thought, oh, I'm going to make it in comedy, but I'm going to be like the Julia Roberts and pretty woman. I'm the new enjano.

Like I want to be Charlize Throne. And I keep thinking of myself that I'm this, you know, what I was when I was 30. And nobody wants that for me. And I've never acted in anything. Well, I have. And I'll never tell anybody what it was because I don't want anybody to watch it because I know I sucked. but I don't I've had myself up on this thing that I'm supposed to be this beauty. And I think that may be being from the South.

We put a lot of emphasis. Or our parents did back then, you know, me growing up in the 70s and 80s. It was, you know, I was on the basketball team and mama would say, put on a tap penny, you know, that'll hold you in while I'm playing basketball. Right. You know? Who cares? Yeah. We were, everything was like a pageant.

But you look at, look at, I mean, that's the one thing you have to remember, too, is that we aren't in modeling or leading man or woman acting. We are comedians. We're supposed to be funny. And if you, if there's something that looks a little even funnier, like, you know, you look at Jim Gaffigan or Pat and Oswald, I mean, you know, the, The funnier looking you are, the better, the more people like it, because that's what we are. But I have the same thing. When I put on a suit and go perform, I think I'm Carrie Grant. You are.

And I had one reviewer say that I looked like I was an aluminum siding salesman. And I was like, Carrie Grant doesn't sell aluminum siding. You know, that special you did where it has a vintage look to it, and I think you've got on a velvet blazer. Yeah. Purple. I shared some from the other day.

I love that. And I thought it had a very Tom Jones vibe to me. And I love Tom Jones. And, honey, I've seen him in concert before the pandemic. and I mean, I had terrible unbiblical thoughts about that little man who is 80. I don't know. He used to spray his hair on now I don't even think he does that anymore. I mean, he was so cute.

And I've always thought that video to me, that special had that vibe. Yeah, I wanted it to be, I wanted it to be specifically like the time that I liked show business, which was like in the 70s and 80s, like to me, that's what was on television and film. And I thought, well, that's excited. That's when people had fun in show business. And I wanted to kind of mimic that.

But it's funny because I always go back and forth between, should I look more like that, or should I just throw on a jacket and go do it? You know what I mean? Like, that's such a distinct look. And again, it came down to the packing. I was like, well, then I got to carry boots and I got to carry a velvet jacket. It's just too much work.

But it was very like, you remember when Johnny Cash and all these people would be on these variety shows? Mm-hmm. And Krister Soverson was high as a kite and say something crazy. Yeah. I loved all that too. I loved that era. And Dean Martin and all that, they would come out. And you're right.

That was a wonderful time. It seemed free. You know, it seemed like everything seems a little more calculated now. like people making appearances on like late night shows they're like there to sell something it's just there wasn't that it's all kind of formulaic this is why this is why we have to uh maybe go on tour together because we could we could bring back like that kind of vibe you come out your gowns i come out in my velvet jacket you could smoke cigarettes on stage cigarettes and i can back on my hair and have it back like a you know like a tamie one net kind of um yeah trying to think of honey wait who was

the big who would have been the women that were you know what did you ever watch johnny cash johnny cash and um what's what's that his wife jean yeah june yeah but i'm thinking who was in show business around that time who would have been with the rat pack shirley mclean you know somebody who had a big uh Back home. You remember Joey Heatherton? What was her name? St. Tom, I'm in brain thong from menopause and I can't. I used to know everybody in Hollywood.

But when Jerry Lee Lewis would have the marathon, and she would come out in those in a tiny bikini bottom with fishnet hose and dance, Joey Heatherton, maybe. That whole thing. Loved it. Oh, my God. Yeah. So you worked the win, right?

I'm sure. Yeah, yeah. I mean, that backstage, that green room, and those pictures of people, I'm just about passed out. I know. It's this gorgeous backstage. You really feel like you're in show business, like you've made it. It's this gorgeous backstage at the wind, and it has all pictures of the Sinatra era. And, yeah, it really, it makes you feel like, oh, we're really doing something.

And then you do your show, and you're like, all right, let's go out. and then you walk through the hallways and everyone's in their flip flops and their shorts and their tank tops. You're like, oh, I guess I'm back to reality. Are you doing the wind soon? I looked at your schedule. I'm trying to think of what you. I don't think I have one on the books there now. But you just did one or something?

I just did one, yeah. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's a great spot. It is. I'm coming, I'm going to be there during rodeo week. Rodeo week.

Uh-huh, which I didn't know that. I said, they said, do you want to go in December? And I thought, surely, Mamas were getting ready for little children to go to have Christmas. Yeah. And I don't know that, you know, and my audience is probably not all young moms, of course, but it's women having to do Christmas. Right. And they go, oh, you wouldn't even believe it. You will not believe how exciting it is for rodeo week.

And who all comes and all these big names come in. Wow. And they have all this stuff that's got to do with rodeos. So I don't, you know, I don't know. But I'm giving it a world. Yeah, no, that'll be great. That'll be great. I remember I did, I opened for Jerry Seinfeld a couple of years in a row, like the day after Christmas.

It was like December 26. And I remember thinking, this is, I've never left my family the day after Christmas. This is going to be bizarre. Why would even people come? And it was packed. The casinos, Vegas. people, you realize, not everybody likes their family. And people got away.

Yeah. And went to Las Vegas. Exactly. Exactly. It would never dawn on me to do that. The only time I've ever been away from my family, my parents, my family went skiing with another family the day after Christmas or the day of Christmas, we were gone. And I never felt right.

I'll never do that again. You know? Yeah, I know. right me. No, I know. Even that, even the 26th was just like, I didn't like the feeling either. It just didn't feel right. But it does exist. But then you let you let the single drug addict comedians take those. We'll come back out on New Year's. The dark moody. Oh, you know, I've gone to watch some of those dark moody young people. And I'm, you know, Tom, I've always wondered if this, if I had the guts to try this.

when I was 18, you know, if I left high school and went to California or New York trying to make it, I probably would have, well, I would have been going, you know, and I would have been saying dark, twisted things. I probably would have. I mean, I didn't know anything else, you know. I had a bunch of cans and I know, but there's, it's, I don't know. I did that. I was in New York and I was going up after like David Tell and Nick DePaolo and all of these guys who were like pretty dark. And, hilarious, but you know, the different vibe. And I thought, well, I got to do that too. And I stood up there like the first couple of times at the comedy cellar and I was swearing and like trying to talk about sex. And the audience who didn't know me at all were just like, no, you're pretend. They could, they could sense that it wasn't me. And you know what I mean? Like you really, you just are what you are. And even though you're surrounded and want to be like the cool kids like that, uh, you're just cool in a different way.

You're right. My darling. You're right. And there was one time when I first got started that I said a couple of cuss words. And, um, and I remember people going, and it made me feel bad. And I, and it wasn't true to me. It, you know, I really, I was really quoting somebody else, but, um, but it did not feel right to me.

And I've never done it since. Yeah. Uh, nowhere. words? What about ass? No, I have called my husband a bastard. Okay. And, um, and, and he, um, he was born on Valentine's Day and I say, which is ironic because he's a bastard. But, I, um, and I mean that the sweet way. And he knows he is. Like, he knows he's difficult.

So, yeah, that's the only thing. I think the only thing. And now I have a bit about my baby child spell cussing because I did not want anybody to cuss in our house. And so everybody had to get around it by spell cussing. So I have projected that onto my children because my little mom and daddy, I never heard them either one of. I did hear my mama say, well, S-H-I-T, one time she was going through menopause. I look back on it. She was probably 49-50. She had worked in this meat house all day.

did all the accounting, did all, you know, work manual labor, took care of the house. And she came home and the garbage smelled terrible and nobody taking it out. She said, this smells like SHIT. And we were all like scared to that. And we got the garbage and took it out real quick. And I never heard, but I never heard anybody say anything else. And so I've projected it on to my children. I'm like, don't you dare say anything terrible.

And I'm sure they get out in dark alleys and say terrible things. Oh, absolutely. That's the thing. I don't, I really hardly swear in my everyday life. I'll say shit once in a while or, you know, once in a while. But I really just don't. So why would I put it in my act? It just doesn't, it would be, it's not really true. But I know for a fact that my daughters swear up a storm when they're not around me. and my daughter, we were driving in the car, and we went to dinner, and she was with her friend in the backseat, and we're driving home, my wife and I, and we got her and her friend, and my daughter, out of nowhere, goes, how much further, when are we getting back to the hotel? Because I really have to take a shit. What? My wife, what are you, what? You're our little angel, our youngest, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our, our. cotton ball princess she was she was more offended that we were offended about her saying it than we were about her saying it with just that's what people do like we don't you dare don't you say it

my girls my baby would say the same thing that your baby said and my other two would laugh so hard and my son my girls are so much nastier and talk talk about that kind of stuff, then my boy would. My boy would never. But he's my oldest child. You know, and Lord, I put so much on them. So I expected it to be perfect, telling everybody, he's perfect, you know, bless us all. He's the religious one.

Yes. They're all, you know, have the Holy Spirit. But yes, he is the one that was just straight-laced and never gave us any trouble or none of them have really given us any trouble. But, yeah, he was, he's been a. jewel and then he's the one that's got my grandbaby and um yeah but i did i put a lot of expectations on him but tom he what he you know in fifth grade was listening to johnny cash and um and merle haggard and just was like a from a different time and he was just an unusual kid and he would you know he was interested in gardening and he cooks now for his family and loves canning food and

putting up, like we call it in the South, putting up our vegetables and all that. And he loved outdoors and was just so an old soul and had this sweet spirit. And then, um, so I, I, then that made me just even more. I just, I thought, well, you're from heaven. I mean, you're absolutely from heaven. And he was, and he just never talked back or anything like that. But I know that I put a lot of expectations on him. But, um, but, but in his sisters are precious.

but I remember him, taking him to a middle school party. And I was so excited. He got invited and, you know, we were at a new school. And he walked down after it's over and he goes, I don't ever need to go back to something like this. He said, you wouldn't believe what they were doing. And, you know, people were making out.

And the parents were kind of racy. And they had like, I think they were those kind of people that left a, not a liquor canning open, but maybe let the beer, you know. and letting little children drink alcohol, which is stupid. Anyway, he came out and he was like, I don't need to go back back to him. And so he always said stuff like that to me, and then I would just lift him even more up into unbelievable expectations. I need to pay for his therapy.

Some of your, a funny part of your act when you used to say that he, but then when he fell in love that you were his extended family, that after once that his wife was now his immediate family and now even though you loved him so much and put him in such a great place but now you were pushed aside has that yeah is that still and he said mom that's biblical i'm supposed to cling to my wife and um yes and he does and i get it now but see tom i mean i'm okay like i grieved over that and now i'm okay because he's giving me a baby a grandbaby like i don't i've got that grandbaby i don't need anybody else you know yeah but um but yeah um yeah he and i love his wife they live 20 minutes from us oh that's nice i know so i get to see

the baby and them all the time and they need help you know yeah i'm i'm i'm trying to figure out how to do that because i've got one daughter who loves the east coast and one who loves the west coast and I'm trying I'm I see my future I'm trying to figure out how can I trap them into the same place so we're going to all be around each other but I haven't figured it out yet I know and Tom I know that people probably think I've done this to my kids and that um that I'm selfish it just happened that like one works at a hospital near us one is a professional makeup artist the baby so she takes jobs and will go off to you know, a movie set, and then she'll come back and kind of, you know, not dating anybody or anything.

So she'll just keep her kind of her home base with us. And then, and then my son lives down the road. And I know that, you know, parents are probably looking at me like, you did this. You did this. The thing. It's just to work out that way. And let me tell you, I loved it. And I had Charlie, my son's teacher in middle school said she loved him.

And she said, my boy is outdoors him. and wanted to go to Colorado to school from Tennessee. And she said, I let him land. And he married a girl that was from there. So then they moved the Pacific Northwest. And she said, if I could give you any advice, have Charlie go somewhere in the south so that at least you get to be with your grandchildren. And that is something calculated that we did.

And it's terrible, but we did. Yeah, no, that's, that's smart. The only advantage I could see is if I can keep them poor. And then I could be like, oh, we rent, we picked up this little condominium down the road. If you could stay in there for free, it really help us out. Yeah. Once they get money, then keep them down. Yeah, keep them down, exactly.

Did we talk about the makeup artists last time? Because my daughters, my daughters wants. to do that. She does? Yeah. Okay, my baby child went to college, but then she came to us and said, you know, I really always wanted to do this. And so we sent her to school in Manhattan and New York. And it's the same. There's another school. They have two or three, maybe one's in London and one's in L.A. And, and she learned, we never thought she would like the special effects, but she loved it. And so she did that extended program and she does she can make you bald and put a bullet hole in you and all that so she does but she loves beauty and i've raised these children on products and in the salon because i was always going to get my hair done and i've raised these girls to do that too but she just worked did wrapped her first major motion picture with sony and it's the george foreman story whoa no way yeah and and forest Whitaker was in it whoa and um yeah so she

and it was shot in New Orleans, so she did that. But she's trying to figure out now, she's 24, she's trying to figure out if she wants to do live television. There's so many things you can do in makeup. Yeah, yeah. Or go on tour with somebody out of Nashville, you know, country music artist or something. Right.

And she's looking for a man, Tom. She wants a man. And so the women in the makeup artist, the head makeup artist in New Orleans said, you can't find a man out here. Like, because you're, if you're a makeup artist on movies, then you go to the next movie, and then you go to the next movie and you're in a different town. You can't, you can't have a relationship, really.

Mm-hmm. So she said, this is something you need to do later in life. So she loved the movie, the whole movie business part of it. But she needs, she wants a man, honey. We like men. We dig man. We do. And we like to get a rope in a man, you know, and have much kids.

We do. And she's looking for one. Good for her. Well, I'll have to ask you more about the school and stuff when we're, when we're done here. Because, yeah, my daughter's, she's pretty determined. She's like, I don't know, but going to school and partying and just, I kind of want to go to work and go do this. But I felt the same thing. Like we need some continuing education for it. But yeah. Well, and see, y'all are out there. Y'all got the best. But I can tell you this, Tom, because I kind of followed her on it. I wanted her to finish her undergrad. graduate and my husband has hired thousands of people. And over the years, and he said, I don't think that that everybody, not college isn't for

everybody. And he said, I have got people that could run this company that graduated from high school. And he said, if she wants to go in the trades or do whatever she wants to do, let her do that and get out and start working. He was behind it the whole time. And she's good. And she loves it. She really goes.

Oh, that's good. That makes me feel better. I was a little, I was, you know, because we do have in our mind, like, well, you should go to school. But the more people I talk to, very successful people, not a lot of them went. Yeah. Because they were determined if they had a purpose, if they had like an idea, they're not just going to flounder and, you know, go in the basement, do bong hits. Right. When you were texting, you texted me the other day that you were going to text me because you, you,

were on the road and you got home and cooked for your family, something like that, right? Yes, because you and I talked about how you, one of the best things for you is when you get off the plane on Sunday, you like to go to the grocery store and get what you're going to cook for your family. Yeah. And that's what I love doing. And so when I get home enough, if I get, now this weekend,

I won't get home until like seven or something, but, and the grandbaby will be already in the, bed. But I try to get groceries and go over to my son's house and save my baby. And then my baby that's the makeup artist and my son could both could be chefs. And I know everybody thinks their crow is the blackest and that their children are the smartest. But I'm telling you, both of them are foodies and they love they're they've got a garden going right now. Oh, nice. And then they and they put up a bunch of stuff in the garden. And then they're playing their phone. garden already for all their lettuces and they're.

Oh, that's great. All that. And so we go over there and really I end up kissing that baby in the mouth and they end up there cooking. But we like, you know, they, they, they, like, grow their own herbs and do all that. Oh, that's great. And all be together. And then my middle child will come. She's got a boyfriend and she, you know, they're up each other's butts.

But I want her to come over too. I'm like, you got, I'm getting out of the airport. And then we're going to be. And she goes, okay, I'll be over there. And so she's starting to bring him more around because I think they're getting a little serious. But how old is she? She's 26. And she's the one that's in nonprofit and raises money for East Seasie Children's Hospital.

She worked for Make a Wish before them. And she, yeah, she raises a lot of money and is very young. And they think she's dynamic. Tom, I'll just tell you, she's dynamic. And that's, I look like her. before I got beat down. I ate white flower and sugar and ate my emotions on the bathroom floor. I look like her in my body and everything.

And I just live through her now. I just look at her and like, because she's so cute, but she can talk to people and she's got a good personality. She connects with people. So people give her millions for children's hot. but she was very good at race it. But she loves these little children. And she used to volunteer for them when she was in high school.

And then when her sorority, she worked with children going through chemo and that kind of like. So to her, it's easy to say, we need a trauma unit for these little children. If they get in a car accident, I need $250,000 and people just gave it to them. Oh, that's amazing. That's so great.

Yeah, I have a sister like that that does nonprofit work. And it does make you feel a little worse about yourself. and how much you help people. But I always fall back on, well, I just fill the world with laughter. You do, Tompapa. You joyful, yummy thing. You really do. And I'm not blowing smoke up your butt.

I told you in things we've done before that my husband and I saw you in San Antonio with Jerry Seinfeld. And we were just, I mean, I have loved you for years. And I would just think, oh, if I could be like Tom, if I could be like Tom. if I can be like Tom. I mean, you are you so much joy. Well, that's good because I'm not getting up early to help kids with trauma. Well, and don't we have to remind ourselves because we are out on the road and I'm in this dark Hilton Garden Inn, which nothing against Hilton Garden Inn. I dig it, clean van.

But I do think, oh, you know, and I got to get my luggage and what if the luggage is lost and I got to get to this and I got to get an Uber or a rental car. And then I get to those shows and I remember, oh my gosh, they come out here to see me. Yeah. You know, I know. And they are precious. Yeah. Oh, you're so funny. You're so good.

You have such a great control on stage. You just have this great pace. You're never pushing, which is sometimes you see comics and they will surprise you because they're going so quickly. that you can't catch up to what they're doing. But why I know that you're so funny is because you go at a slower pace and you still surprise us. You still can't figure out where the joke is going to come. It really is. Oh, thank you, Tom.

Oh, that means a lot, you angel. Because you know how we get in our own hand. And I think, do I know what I'm doing? I mean, I've done this 22 years. And there were times in my career where I was so confident and I could get, I could go up. even if I hadn't worked in a while, I could remember everything and do. And then now,

the bigger of this has happened for me, I'm almost less secure. Like I think, am I okay? Yeah. Why do you think that is? I have the same thing. I have,

I don't know. Why do you think that is? I don't know, Tom. Is it because we are artist? And we put our heart on our sleeve. And so I don't know. Because you look at Jim Gaghan.

I tell people all the time, I go, oh, I'm getting so old and I'm the old one. And then I look at what other people's age. He is. And I think, you know what? I'm the same age as all these other people that have worked like dogs for years. And then it just comes together. Because Joe Coy, I looked up, Joe's 51. And I was listening to y'all talk to him about, and he was starting at 17 in Las Vegas.

And I was, my thyroid was off, Tom. and I thought during July and I thought I'm so tired. What is wrong with me? But I'd been going, going, going. And I told my team, I go, I need a break or I'm going to lose it. And they left me alone and I took some time off. And then I just, I was in Florida. My baby child taught me into going to Florida for two weeks and it was just so hot.

And I just didn't. I tried to exercise every day and I feel good. So I came back and I got my blood work done. Well, the guy that takes my blood is a huge comedy fan. and he will say, you know, tell me where all he's been and all that while he takes my blood. And he said, I saw Joe Coy in Knoxville and at the Civic Auditorium. And he said he did crowd work for 80% of the time. And which I thought, oh my gosh.

And he said to the first three rows. And then he said, we would make over these people and then give him merchandise. He'd go, you need a sweatshirt or whatever. And like Oprah and gave out and said, go to this person and get him. when you were talking about it. Why was I talking about that? I don't even know what I was saying. But anyway, I think my thyroid's going to be okay.

But my phlebotomist, I guess is what you call it, was sitting there talking about Chelsea, you know, doing her special the next night after Joe did that. And then, you know, they've broken up and I'm devastated. I'm devastated. It's hard to take. It's really hard to get through. That gave me something to look forward to it.

It really did. And I even, and I've met Chelsea. It was years ago and she was darling to me, but I even, I would stall them kind of. And I would say, Chelsea, have a baby by Joe Coe. You probably still ovulating. You know, she's been. She takes care of herself. I go, have a baby by Joe Coe.

Would that not be a darling baby? And then they broke up. And I had just been like, devastated over that. But anyway, I don't know if Chelsea Handler is running the streets, feeling like she can't do it. I don't know. Did Joe Coy say that he feels insecure at this point? But I do. I don't know. Yeah, I think I don't I think I don't know. I think if you really care about it and you want to be as good as you can be, it's, it's impossible not to have moments of doubt. Because you're, especially when you've been doing it a long time, you know what great comedy is. And you know what, you know what, you know what is. What is. successful mediocre comedy. You can see people fooling people. And if you really want to be great,

I think you kind of wake up every morning thinking, I've got work to do. I'm not, I'm not there yet. I think that's what. Yes. Right. Yes. That's exactly how I feel. Yeah. Which is good. But I mean, and you do have to have these moments of like, okay, well, I may not feel really so confident, But there is a reason why the people are coming out to see me tonight and filling up this theater. I've obviously, I'm not terrible. I go through that every day. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, 100%. Yeah, 100%. But I think it's because you just want to be as good as you possibly can be. And if you ever get to a point where you're like, I am as great as I wanted to be. then you're probably done. You're probably not going to be writing anymore. You're not going to be searching anymore.

You still always have to have that thing we had when we were starting out, which was this kind of searching vulnerability. I don't think that goes away. Yeah. I saw this great thing. I was looking at interviews with Jerry Garcia from the Grateful Dead, because I never really heard him speak that much. And I was watching him in an interview yesterday.

and he was saying, and this is something I really want to keep in mind, it was, I do this because I enjoy it. I do this because it's fun. He said, and I think that that's what stops you from burning out. I mean, you know, he ended up with a drug problem and is no longer here. But he said, if you get into it because you want fame and money, you're going to burn out because that's going to come and go. and it's something that you can't really control all that much. But what you can control, if you get into it because I love this and this is fun to do and I just want to enjoy this and get as good as I can at it,

then you won't burn out because you have something you're always working towards. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. And I thought when I got started, I remember thinking it's something that I have to do. It was a burning desire. Right. Like I know I'm going to do that. this, even if it took me, I knew it when I was, you know, in high school, but I didn't start until I was 32, but they even going and getting a degree and getting married and doing all the things I did.

Yeah. I knew in my heart, I have something to say. I've got to do this. This is something that I'm meant to do. Right. And then I think I put so much pressure on myself because these people are so precious to me, Tom. Yeah. And this, in my demographic, I truly believe nobody speaks to them.

if they kind of ignore them, middle-aged women. I think that, you know, and so I think, and my team will say this, they'll say, you know, your fans are probably not comedy fans. They've connected with you. Kind of like Sebastian Montescalco. They said, you know, he's, if you watch comedy, you don't even know who Sebastian, a lot of people don't even know who he is. Yeah, yeah.

When I think of people, comedy fans, they know Tom Pampa, Jim Gaffey, David Tell, Bill Burr, right, Shepa, all that. The women that are coming to see me and their husbands do not know who those people,

I think. Yeah. They're not, you know, they haven't come up through Comedy Central. I've watched Comedy Central. I'm a comedy fan. Right, right.

But that's why I try to, when I see something, darling that you put out, I try to share it because I want people to know because I really think that my audience, some of them, but most of them do not even know

who people are. Oh, that's really interesting. So I want to do the best I can for them because I know that they feel heard. I feel like I'm speaking for them. Yeah, yeah. And not enough, you know, life changing, you know. Yeah.

I don't mean to sound like it's so profound. I don't mean that. No, but you're speaking. Yeah, you're taking their experience and putting and making it funny and they don't hear that often. They don't hear that. I feel like I'm representing them. And so that even puts more pressure.

I feel like I need to go home with everyone out of, clean their house, put in a load of wash, start a cassero. Now how will they feel when they hear, as we did, that Joe Coy and Chelsea Handler were getting together, how is your audience going to feel when they hear that you and I have. left our families and run off together. Do you think they'll accept it, or do you think that they'll think that you've lost it? I do a lot of material about Chuck, my husband, and they'll probably go,

Liam was so tired. Chuck stayed after her all the time and grabbed her breast and while she was trying to fry a chicken. They'll probably think, oh, Leanne's in menopause, she ain't doing nothing. Those two are smoking cigarettes and watching Netflix. Let me tell you that my husband and I've gotten so. It's just like this has brought this new thing in our life.

We figured out I had never even heard of, I'd heard of Better Call Saul. But I had never watched it. Yes. And we have got, it's like date night and we get so excited for the next episode. And then last night when he called me, I said, what are you doing? He goes, I'm watching Better Call Saul. And I said, okay, I'm getting in the bad and I'm going to watch it on my iPad. And so we can watch it at the same time.

But we have just fallen in love with that. We love that. That's so funny you say that because that's the one. We started watching it years ago. And then we lost our way. And now we know that it's going to sync up with Breaking Bad at the end of the season. And we're like, oh, we should get. but then I look at how many hours I have to go.

It's like a full year I'd have to keep watching before I. Well, yeah. Yeah, it's a lot. But I guess that's what you got to do. And it literally is better call Saul because it is so good. Oh, so good. And see, I try to start breaking by end so many times. And then I just, I don't know, I'd start watching Real Housewives and Beverly Hills came out or something horrible.

Yeah. And then, but so I haven't seen that and I think, oh, should I have watched Breaking Bad before I saw, better call Saul, before I started that. Oh, God, yeah. And then now you just doubled up here. There's no way. That's how our life is, though, Tom. Chuck and I, we don't have a lot going on. We just want to see this baby.

And then, you know, my husband is in the, works for a big company. And when this hit for me, I mean, he still doesn't understand what's happening. It took him a long time. I was like, I think we can get our toilets fixed. And he was like, what? We don't need to spend any money. So I really, I said this last time. I said this last time when we were together, but I really want to, I have to talk to my agent about routing where I can get a, where I can get a show near you and Chuck somewhere in that vicinity when you're not on the road.

Like I need like a Tuesday night show. Like 50 miles from where you live. So I can roll through and have a meal with you all before you go out on the road. Oh, my darling. I would love that. Would you ever go to the Beezue or Tennessee Theater in Knoxville? Yeah, I would do that. Because the Beesu is about 700 seats.

That's what I've always worked. And the Tennessee theater is probably around 1,500 and stunning. Really? Absolutely stunning. We don't have a comedy club anymore. I know you're doing theater. You have done theaters for years, but they are beautiful. You need to think about it.

All right. I'll put that on the left. And I know people. That's the one place that would book me, you know, with other times I couldn't get arrested. Right. All right. Before I let you go, you're on the road. Where are you now?

I'm in Davenport, Iowa, and then I'll be in Omaha, Nebraska tomorrow night. And then I've got probably. you know, this is a 100 city tour with Outback Concerts, the Big Panty Tour. I'm probably on 70-something. So I've got 30 dates, you know, the rest of the year. And then I'm starting a new tour. Oh, wow. Another 100 cities.

Jeez. You are just killing it. Thank you, Tom. It's so great. I have to get these in my arms. But, okay, that will start in March. And then you remember I told you that I was going to try. try to write a book.

Okay. I have now, that has come to fruition. I'm writing a book and we hope that'll be out in 2020. Oh, that's exciting. Do you have a working title? You're the writer. You know, we're going around about it. We don't have one yet.

But, you know, it scares me to death. But I'm excited and I feel like I've got, I mean, there's already been a proposal and all that stuff and it got bought. but I feel like my story's important because I want to not to get sappy, but I just think I want people to know it's never too late and to dream. You know, I'm a dreamer. And I start out in this crazy business, which I heard Bill Burr saying to Polly Shore, a video came up on my Facebook of them.

And Bill Burr said, this is a, this business is a mother. You know, I can't. And I thought, he's so right. It's so hard. It is a lot of pressure. All right. So now you're, so you're, uh, your tour and people and I'll say in the intro and give you nice, lots of plugs and lots of the things.

But what are you going to do? You're at the Hilton and you've got to show tonight. What is your food strategy? How do you, what will you eat? When will you eat? Oh, Tom. Okay. Um, because I had a big breakfast.

Okay. And I tried to get a lot of protein in there. Okay. Because I knew I was to be satiated. And then I'm going to get this Bingard alone and go to the theater. And I'm trying to work out my food where it's not so bad. But I have a veggie tray. And I try to make sure that I've got like cauliflower and broccoli because I know that that's cancer fighting.

And then I get a, there's a fruit tray that will have blueberries. And I'm really not a big fruit person, but I try to eat those antioxidants. Because I think, how am I going to keep doing this? And then they have a cheese tray for them. and I have that for my openers, and they love the cheese. And then I think, I'm not going to eat that cheese. And then I eat the cheese. And therefore, while they're trying to do gluten-free crankers and that way to the waist

side, so I eat it, you know, a sleeve of wits. And then there's a bottle of wine. And I say every night, I'm not going to open that bottle of wine. And then I open that bottle of wine and I have a little sippy poo. And then they come in with menus and they go, you don't want to order something? And I think, I'm not going to order anything. And then they go, oh, there's this great Italian place right down the road. And they got the best, you know, cabanara or whatever.

And then we end up doing that. After the show? And I've got to stop doing it. Eating after the show? Eating, you know, but I'm really trying not to eat as heavy because I know that it makes me Waller in a Hilton Garden Inn all night. If I've eaten a big gob of food. I know. I know.

Chicken piccata with an Asian. hair. I don't need to be worn in that all. Well, the problem is you eat that and then you eat after the show and you wind down and maybe you see the people and then you eat and then you eat and then you're trying to go to sleep within an hour. It's really, that's not a way to live. But it's so much fun, but that meal is so much fun. It is. But and I can't eat that big, big something before the show. And this is terrible for me to say because I know we're going to date, but I will build you into the microphone. I mean, I can't eat before a show.

I can't either. I have the same exact thing that you have backstage. I have the veggie plate. I've got the fruit plate. And in place of your cheese, I have chips, a big bowl of kettle chips. And I tell myself, and this is so stupid, the same of your cheese. I'm not going to eat those chips. I'm not going to eat those chips.

And then I eat all the chips. And you created the writer. You decided what was going to be that. It's like when you're in the supermarket, you're like, I'm going to eat well. But all of a sudden, well, how'd those Oreos get in there? I was about to say Oreos. And my little darling girl that's with me on my tour, she'll say, you can change it anytime, and just let me know.

And I just, it's like this whole mind thing. You know, for a while I had, and I think you and me and Fortune talked, about this, I had uncrustables. Oh, yeah. And they would end up getting me these huge things of uncrustables. And I'd try to give them out because I hate food waste. But I went to a nutritionist and she said, if you just have little peanut butter on a whole weed to give you just a little something, you know, so you're not so hungry after show

and eat wrong after show. So in my mind, I hated for them to have a loaf of bread, a jar of peanut butter, all that. So I said, what about an uncrustable, low sugar? So then that turned into a whole thing. Oh my gosh, you've been 10 of them. Have you ever had one of those? Never.

I don't make you smack somebody. Unbelievable. So I had to get rid of those. So yeah, it's just a mind game. Every night, what I know. Well, I'm glad I asked the question because I thought you would have it dialed in

and I would learn from you, but I've learned nothing other than it's a struggle. And I'm dealing with the same thing. I'm trying to hydrate better. I'm really trying to do it. that and not drink. They have a Diet Coke for me there, but I thought, oh, if I drink that Diet Coke at 5.30 after a sound check, one, I'll burp in the microphone, and it would keep me up for four

days. I mean, I would be like breaking band, mass. That's how to fix me now. But anyway. Oh, my God. We'll have a great show tonight. I can't wait to see you. Hopefully we'll be able to be in the same time zone at some point and see each other in person

again. and I'll get my agent on the on the Knoxville run I will book that one oh you would be you would love that it's beautiful and people wouldn't love you oh my darling okay love you take care of yourself i love you tom pompe I love you thank you so much for having me I've had a ball well you'll you'll be back more and more and more okay thank you take care Leon bye my darling bye all right that's our big show I told you she's adorable. I told you she's hilarious. Leanne Morgan, I just love the way she talks. I could hear her talk. When she says that I am yummy, I just, I start to float a little bit.

You just need that kind of person in your life. It's obvious why people are filling up theaters to go spend time with her. She's so damn funny. And I hopefully we'll get to Knoxville and be able to spend some time with her and her family, even though I'm going to eventually steal her from her husband. Go to tompapa.com, look up all of my dates. We just announced, by the time this airs, it might be sold out, but October 1st, I am recording my new Netflix special at the Wilbur Theater in Boston. Tickets may still be available for the 945 show. Hopefully you can come and be a... part of it. It's going to be, it was a date that we had already on the dates, and it lined up that we could actually do the recording of the Netflix special. If you can't get there, I'm doing a whole series of clubs. I've got Salt Lake City this weekend. I'm doing shows at Wise Guys. This is all in prep for the special. And then I'm going to Tempe, Arizona at the improv. We added a show in Chicago. We have Honolulu. I wonder if we have any podcast listeners. Honolulu. So big tour leading up to the recording of the special, and then we've got a bunch of

shows after that. We're going to D.C. and Red Bank, New Jersey, and a whole bunch of great shows. So go to Tompapa.com for all of that. All right. Thank you so much for listening. You guys are the best. We love doing this show for you. Thank you to Leanne Morgan. Thank you to Helix Sleep. We'll see you next time.