Breaking Bread with Tom Papa - Episode 136 - Come To Papa Xmas

Episode Date: December 20, 2022

It's a Christmas miracle! It's a star-studded celebration recorded live 12/6/21. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Hey! sourdough. Hey, it's time for Breaking Bread with Papa. Hey, don't you know? Hey, it's also a show. Hey. Hey, everybody. Welcome to another edition of Breaking Bread with Tom Papa. I'm Tom Papa.

Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah, happy holidays and all the good things. I hope you're doing well. We are about to take off for a week or so. It might be two weeks, but it's more likely one week. We'll see. I'll come back and talk to you if that's the case. But I'm in New York City.

I just did a bunch of shows. I just ran through Times Square after getting to wait, wait, don't tell me. And a trip to Austin and running around telling everybody about the new Netflix special. I buzzed back here to New York. and I figured this would be a fun thing to do as our last little thing here at the end of the year. I'm going to play for you today the Come to Papa Christmas special. Yes, the Come to Papa Christmas special. This is a really good one.

This is the thing, if you're not aware, this is the thing that I do all the time about, I'd say between six and nine times a year at the village underground in New York City. And it's a, been doing it for a long time. It's the live Come to Papa show that's featured on Sirius XM. And it's a variety show. It's comedy. It's sketch. It's music.

It's all good things. And we have a great time putting it together. And one of the best times is the Christmas show. So I figured, as we were going through the archives, let's do this. that. Let's serve this up and give a little crossover from Come to Papa to Breaking Bread with Tom Papa and play this special for you. This was, again, at the Village Underground, it stars Rosebud Baker, Sean Patton, Gary Goldman, Dave Hill. It really was a great show, and there's some funny music and some fun stuff that goes on during it, and it's a good thing for you to listen

to get in the spirit and enjoy yourself. I hope you're eating a lot of good things. I hope you're having a good time. I am, uh, I had two steakhouse meals back to back. So I have doubled in size. I've increased my sodium by a thousand percent and I really should just stop eating until the new year. Probably won't happen. There's some homemade toffee on my desk. that a friend of mine made. There's a bottle of wine that the good people at this hotel gave me. It's an all out of salt. It's an all out of salt. Get to the gym in between. That's my advice. Just get to the gym, sweat out a little bit of whatever you're putting in you. But make sure you put a lot in you. Because this is the time to do it. Enjoy yourself. I hope you have a great New Year. Happy New Year.

if I don't speak to you before then. Do you have plans? I have no idea what I'm doing this year. No idea. Last couple, I guess they were the COVID ones. The highlight was getting caviar from this little caviar shop. Not like crazy expensive. I mean, it's all expensive.

But caviar and kettle one martinis, that's kind of all you need to do. And then really you should be asleep. by nine. But I'm not sure what I'm doing. I'm not sure what I'm doing. I hope you're going to do something fun. Enjoy yourself. I'll be posting pictures, of course,

of the big feast of seven fishes and getting back home and baking lots of bread and all that good stuff. Take your time, enjoy your life, and enjoy this. Come to Papa special.

Again, very funny people on it. Rosebud Baker, Sean Patton, Rick Chrome, Gary Gullman, Dave Hill. Enjoy it. Enjoy your life. And I'll see you next time. It's Christmas in New York, where we belong. Let's pop a champagne cork and light a bonn. I like the Yuletan cheer.

I like liquor too. I like a sugar plum. Egg nougar with lots of rum. How about you? Hello everyone, and welcome to a live Christmas edition of Come to Papa! Now, let's give a warm welcome to your host. He has a candy cane heart and a snowman's head, Tom Papa. I like a Christmas song, can't get my fill.

But drunk's from Santa Con, I just want to kill. trimming trees full of ornaments Loud family arguments Might not be new But I like it how about I like it how about We like it how about you Rick Crow

Hello everybody welcome to the big show I'm Tom Papa Thank all of you listening out there in Radio Land And thank all of you beautiful people Who came out to join us in our live audience At the Village Underground in New York City where you know it's Christmas because even the rats smell like nutmeg. Now, please say hello to the best announcer in the business, the talented Rick Crone.

Oh, hello. Thanks, Tommy. Tonight show is brought to you by Pete's climate change peppermint bark. Everyone loves peppermint bark, but bark comes from trees, and our trees are on fire. We take burnt tree trunks, ground them up into a powder, and pour a bunch of candy canes all over it. beats climate change peppermint bark. Get it while there's still time. Tom?

Now please welcome our band who decorate their gingerbread houses with Colombian cocaine. The Cometrao. Holidays once again, that time of year when we take stock of who we are and who we've become. This year I found myself

decorating the house all by myself. My children are getting older. No longer come running with excitement when I pull the stuffed reindeer's out of the box. Now they just glare at me, roll their eyes, and hit their vape pen. But that's okay. I enjoyed the holidays my entire life. Ever since I was 10, I was taking out the decorations and setting up the train set at Christmas Village.

I call it Christmastown. But this year, there was trouble in Christmastown. It's a true story. Everything seemed to be going along as planned. The little houses were all lit up. A man perpetually walking his dog stood out front to the grocery store. The preacher was holding his Bible, outside his church steps. The kids were building their snowmen, while a herd of plastic reindeer looked on.

Snow covered the ground, and Santa waved from the train. It was perfect. I had set up Christmas town again. But then a rumbling sound was heard in the distance. It was the Rumba. A robotic vacuum making its nightly, rounds, but the sound grew louder. The

preacher started to shake. I thought surely the Roomba would turn back when it hit the train tracks, but it did not. In a robotic rage, as if it was out to devour Christmas itself, the Roomba jumped the tracks

and gunned it for Main Street. The people had no time to react. They had no way to react. They're made of plastic. They just stared in their frozen poses, hoping that someone, that I would jump in and save them. But I was too late. By the time I grabbed it, the little boy who was making the angel had his feet sticking out of the vacuum hole.

The snow covered was torn and mangled against the pizza parlor that now sat on its side. There's no hospital in Christmastown. What was left of the bodies were lined up on the tracks. Santa was missing. It was a bloodbath. 2021 just keeps doing its thing. Did we rebuild? You bet we did.

Did we bury the dead? No, we threw them in the trash. We went back to work. We repaired the pizza place. We re-ran the wires. We replaced the reindeer who were getting old anyway. The preacher was gone. I didn't miss him.

It all came together, but something just wasn't right. And then, out of the darkness, up in the limbs of the tree, I saw a little black boot. I reached up, and I tugged it. It was a Christmas miracle. It was half of Santa. I put his torso back on the train. I took a sip of scotch and watched his Christmas town rejoiced.

My friends, it's easy to talk about hope in the good times, but it's when we are tested that it is a bit of. needed most. Hope. So tonight we all raise a glass and we say fuck Omicron. Fuck the Roomba. It's the Christmas show. Thank you all for coming

out here tonight. We've got a great show. We're going to start with one of my dearest friends. Please welcome the very talented Rosebud Baker, everybody. Rosebud! Tom Potha, everybody. Okay. This is going to be less whimsical. But just

is dark. So, um, this is great. It's great to see all of you here. Um, I feel like we're, uh, we're, you know, the pandemic's over. I mean, it's not over, but we're done. That's what it feels like. Every time the CDC is like, guys, just because you're vaccinated doesn't mean we're finished, battling COVID. Everybody's like, maybe you're not. This is Tampa now, motherfucker. Welcome to the jungle You know It did wear me down though I got engaged on the third day of quarantine

And Thank you, thank you so much I said yes because I thought we had three months to live And then we lived And so I had to follow through Now it felt It felt a little weird to get married during the pandemic Because once it was over

all my single girlfriends were out there just catching dicks left and right and I felt like I was missing out. It felt like I left church early and Jesus showed up with his dick out. I was like this sucks. But then I thought about it and I was like there's no way I could keep up with this level

of horniness that's just taking across just taking the nation. It's insane. We're going to have a new strain of herpes. And I there's no way I could keep up because I stopped trying to impress men a long time ago. I stopped sucking dick six years ago.

Some of you were like, was that an option? It's an option. I'm not good at it. First of all, I'm not. I'm doing this for the good of the country. I'm not good at sucking dick, and I know that. It's not speculation. When you're not good at oral sex,

you don't find out in a fun way. You don't peel open a yo play one day, and there's a message on the top. that you can read in private. No, it's an awakening. So I'll tell you guys the story of how it happened. Surprise twist. Sucking a dick.

Yep, I was down there, just in the dark, like a coal miner. Had my headlamp on and everything. And while I was down there doing that unpaid labor, I heard his voice say, what's your goal right now? Dick in my mind. mouth. Like I was brushing my teeth with it. What's your goal? I thought God was talking to me. Because I started thinking about all my goals. I was like, I know I had goals. And none of them

ended with sucking a dick. So there's been some missteps here. You know, I, I think, uh, it's, it's not that I, I've tried to get better at it, you know, I have. And here's the thing, I gotta go back for this. Because this moment, it wasn't, when somebody says something that honest to you, you don't have time to get offended. Okay? This isn't Twitter. This is real life. So he said that to me, and I said the most honest thing you could possibly say in that situation. He went, what's your goal right now? I looked up. I went, I don't know. I was just going to hang out down here until you set me free. That's the truth, because I don't want to be here. I've never wanted to be here in my life. I'm so bored.

I'm so bored. Every time I'm sucking a dick, I'm thinking about everyone that's ever lent me a pen. Someone with real compassion. You know, I'm doing my taxes down there. And I have tried to get better at it. I've read articles to get better at it. You know? I've done research. I haven't put any of it into practice. But that's because these articles aren't helpful.

They're not, they're always like, try to tickle his balls and touch his nipples and hold his beer. I'm like, how many arms do you think I fucking have? I'm not Ganesh, okay? I need my arms. I can't pump my whole upper body with just my neck

like a dick sucking cobra. Matter of fact, if you need someone to suck your dick with that kind of neck strength, call a man. That's a man's job. It's like installing an AC unit. You know, get a task, grab it in here. I'm not doing that shit myself. So I just understand.

unsubscribed from the whole operation. I said, this isn't my strength. Now when my husband's like, will you suck my dick? I'm like, no, that's gay. It's a gay man's activity. I'm going to outsource that. I got married for the same reason that I voted for Biden. I was tired, and I wanted to make a smart decision.

Okay? And it doesn't mean I don't love my husband. I don't totally love Biden. You know, he's fine, but it is elderly abuse. and I think as liberals we just came together and we were like, we're fine with it, you know? We let him run during the inauguration. That wasn't safe, but we watched it happen.

And yeah, it's kind of, it's... I mean, and I also love my husband, but I've been dating in New York City for 15 years, so I'm a rescue dog, okay? Don't hit me, let's lie down. I don't give a shit. You don't have a job, I don't care. Do you own a blanket?

we'll spend our lives together. I'm a very worn down person. So this whole pandemic just, it was rough, you know? Like here's where I'm at emotionally. I'm not suicidal, but I'm not fighting to live. Like, if I'm getting chased by a bear

in the woods, the most I'm going to do is a casual jog. That's it. I'm not exerting myself. If the bear catches up, he's going to be like, this tastes dead already.

You know, there was a flood in New York City three months ago. I was like, bring on the floods. Let's do it. Do you know how stupid I felt putting a mask on in an Uber filling with water? Beginning of the pandemic,

my husband was like washing off our groceries. I was like, I don't know if I'm washed my groceries off hungry to live. I guess what I'm saying is I got very depressed during the pandemic, I was told. I was informed of that. I didn't know. I thought that when you're depressed,

it meant you were sad all the time. I didn't know that it meant that you could feel nothing at all. And now I'm like, I don't know what depressed people been complaining about. Because this is the most powerful I've ever been. I spent my whole life so sensitive. Nothing can hurt me.

Nothing. I called up a suicide hotline just to see what kind of arguments they had. All right? And this is what... I told you guys it was going to be just as dark. I said it. This is what this bitch said to me. She picked up the phone and she said,

ma'am, which that's an assault. That's wrong, okay? If you work at a suicide hotline and you pick up and you say, ma'am? You better hope I don't have a gun in my mouth. I only call somebody, ma'am, if something's already gone horribly wrong. It's like, ma'am, step away from the body. That's...

It's never a first date that ends like, I could just kiss you, ma'am. So she went on, she goes, ma'am, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And I was like, yeah, that's exactly what I was looking for. Sounds good. I was like, I do feel better. I thought you guys were going to try to talk me out of this. I didn't realize you'd also given up.

I don't want you guys, the whole left side of the room is very worried. And, um, no, I, I would never actually commit suicide. I wouldn't because, uh, because I'm not, I've never nailed a dramatic exit in my life. You're about to see that. Yeah, I haven't. Listen, every, every ex I tried to storm out on, I realized I'm the only one on the lease. And that's because I like broke dudes. and it turns me on to control them financially.

So I've never nailed a dramatic exit, and I'm just worried the same thing would happen with my suicide. You know, I jump out of a building, get my jacket stuck in the window. I look like a city worker that fell asleep. Some guys like, this is why you can't hire women. All right, you guys have been amazing. Thank you so much. Rosebud Baker, everybody, Rosebud.

The cool thing about this show is not only do I get to work with all of our friends, but to show you the many talents that they have. Rick Chrome is not only a very funny comedian and our announcer tonight, but he's also a Broadway actor, composer. He's had shows, one of the longest running,

the longest running variety off-Broadway show in history called Newspical, is Rick's creation. And he's going to come up and perform for you right now. Please welcome back, Rick Chrome, everybody. Thank you, Tom. Well, since it's the holiday season, we thought we put together a little medley of some of our favorite Christmas tunes.

And this, how about a round of applause for this incredible group of musicians? I'm kind of, I'm just excited to sing with you. Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Let your heart be like. From now on, we'll be out of sight. Have yourself a merry little Christmas The Yule Tide To us

Gathering me together You can count on me And mistletoe And presents on the tree Christmas'ee will find me A Christmas And ask you just the same To hold your tie

Maybe I'm crazy to suppose I'd be the one you'd ever chose out of a thousand invitations you'd But in case I stand One Little Chance Here comes that jackpot Answer a question in advance

What are you doing In case I stand One little chance The Jackpole We're at Chrome And now let's travel to the North Pole where we get a magical glimpse of Santa and his elves. Someday, I'd like to be a dentist.

A dentist! We need one up here. I've been studying. It's fascinating. You've no idea. Mollers by cuspid. Now, listen to you, you're an elf. An elves make toys.

Yay, Santa. Merry Christmas, Santa. Oh, my trusty elves. We love you, Santa. Elves rule. Well, as I'm. I head out to deliver these presents on this glorious Christmas Eve. I thank you all for your hard work.

It's because of you that children around the world will be happy on Christmas Day. You bet your ass it is. We love making toys. Merry Christmas and away idols. Because he flies out of sight! God, I love being an elf. It's a lot of work on Christmas Eve, but it really makes it all worth it. Now's our chance.

Let's get the fuck. out of here. What? I'm not kidding. Move it. I packed our bags. There's a truck in the alley. Let's go. What are you saying? I'm saying, fuck this place. Look at our lives.

This is no way to live. Now's our chance. But we're the luckiest elves in the whole world. Wake the fuck up. We're not elves. We're just short. Take that back. Of course. There's no such thing.

We're just short victims of the gig economy. And this fat bastard is using us for slave labor. Don't say such a thing. Oh, grow up. How much money do you have? What's money? The stuff people get after they've worked.

Oh, no, we don't get money. We get lollipops. Because we're idiots. Santa's a criminal. Don't say that gum drop. Don't call me that. Gumdrops my slave name. My real name is Carol. Ew.

Well, I'm an elf through and through. Not me. When I get out of here, I want a steak, a shot of tequila, and a real man. You're going to be on the naughty list. You bet your ass I am. We also need cocaine.

Have you ever heard of cocaine? Candy canes? Cocaine. Candy canes. No, cocaine! It's kind of like a candy cane if you shoved it up your ass. Why would I do that?

Why wouldn't you? I'm sorry, gumdrop or Carol or whoever you are. I'm never going to leave. Just never. I'm staying with Father Christmas. Yeah, that's normal. Calling your employer, Father. I guess it is a little weird.

Yeah, almost as weird as you walking around in tights and pointy shoes. They make me feel pretty. Shit, he's back. I'll see you, dude. Who wants to sit on my lap? I think I do.

Good boy, jellybeat. That's my slave name. Rosebud Baker, everybody. And now, please welcome our next comedian. I love him so much. Please welcome Sean Patton, everybody. Sean Patton. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you very much. How's your simulation been going? You guys doing all right with you? Because it's all real, man. Oh, fuck. Some of you, uh... How are you?

Some of you look like you got here, you skipped therapy to get here. And now you're fucking thinking about some other shit. Which doesn't really lead to being the most enjoying of the comedy show motherfuckers like shake it off let it off let it

you don't get it out of your system with laughter that's what I mean I had an opening joke and I can't remember what it was going to be so I'm just kind of stalling that's what's really happening

all right I'll pull back the curtain I'm projecting that on to you all right I'm up here trying to be like come on give me some more in reality I'm like fuck what was that opening line

that I now it doesn't matter it's gone now we'll just talk you know what you know what you got to accept when you move here just that people are going to play music from their goddamn phone on the train no headphones they're just going to do that you have to just accept that stop fighting against it

it only makes them want to do it more you know it's like it's like trying not to get a boner and and and and i don't know the motivation behind it i i don't know i feel like maybe it's a rebellious thing Like you're not going to tell me how to listen to music, motherfucker. I'll play that shit wherever I want. Which, you know, I don't give a fuck. It's that attitude. But playing music and drunk attention only tells me that you give a deep, like, a deep, like slow eye contact.

Ask if you can come inside me, fuck. You know, like, you really want my attention. But fine, I've accepted that. I've learned about, thank you. Who did that? Thank you. Don't you ever be ashamed of that. that ma'am thank you that was a beautiful snort did you hear that did you hear that

did a beautiful little snort if there was molly on that table it'd be gone you'd have ripped the whole line of molly and one toot ma'am do you know what molly do you do you know what molly is yeah you do hell yeah if you don't know what molly is it used to be called ecstasy and then we forced it to choose a gender that's what happened that's what happened that's what and you know society got hold of a substance and put our shit on the it but and by the way every time an audience member snorts a comedian gets a wish so I appreciate that it's a wonderful Christmas gift here's what I don't understand about the people who now are watching TV shows on their phones with no headphones just watching like loudly I don't get that at all music you can look cool You know, blaring DMX or Sepulah, you know, you can look like, oh, that guy's a hard ass, you know, but blaring season one of Ozark. What do you want me to think? Like, you must have a life, you're too busy, you're just now catching up.

I don't know. Like, here's what I recommend. I mean, you hear the person, listen to what the show they're watching, and just pull up the next episode and just play it louder. Oh, you're not here yet? Sucks for you. Gontlet thrown down. My sister is a jerk. And I don't do segways.

I don't do segues are for the week. You know, that's, I think you guys can keep up. I'm just like TikTok. I just scroll to the next. Here I am. I'm a wacky cat with a human face. And then, oh, oh, no, I'm a butt model. Listen to what I have to say because I have a great ass.

Right? That's the only qualification for these millions of followers. Give me clothes to... Next one. Oh, a horrendously sad thing about the environment. Now it's dying. Let's hope this one's funny. Anyway, so my sister's a jerk because she does this thing.

She's single. When she meets a guy at a bar and he wants her number, she gives him my number. Not a jerk to me. It's a jerk to all these poor souls. She's turning over to me, her comedian, older brother. So I'll just get random texts from time of time. Like, had a great time last night.

We'd love to see you again. And I'll respond, I'm pregnant. Just to see where his head's at. What do we even do last night? Was I awake? You know, like, just throw his afternoon under the bus. But if he responds in a way that tells me he's a good person, I'll then give him my sister's actual number.

It's this very complex vetting system. It doesn't work. She's very single. So maybe you see where this is going, maybe you don't. As four weeks ago, I received my first ever dick pick, right? 4.34 in the afternoon. There it is. That's a penis.

No mistake in that that is a fucking bonier. It was there. And it was a big old vainy jambo. You know what I mean? Like a honker of a dick. You know, some weird discoloration in the middle, but that wasn't his fault. The head was strange. I have to say that.

It had like a flattened sort of, you know, like he had missed a glory hole one too many times. You know what I'm? Like, we've all, look, we're all adults here. We've all seen penises that aren't attached to our bodies or our partners. You know, like some dick's got like the big head, tiny shaft. Some got the tiny head fat shaft, right? There's all kinds of variations. This guy, it looked like if he had an erection on a farm, he could, like, hoe the land.

and for planting seeds, you know? Bid a big honker of a dong now. So I texted my sister like, do you want this dick pick? Am I vetting dicks for you now? Is that how close we've become, Miss siblings? Do you want it? And she just responded, no thanks.

She spelled thanks very annoyingly, too. Like no vowels and an ex. So there it goes. I just had this guy's dick pick on my phone. and then within the hour he question marked it. I'm like, the dude wants feedback. I'm not just going to leave him hanging. So I just sent him back a dick pick.

There you go. There it is. The Bible say an eye for an eye. And this case should be the eye of the peenies. So, but I didn't do like he did. That's the difference. He had like, he put work into it, obviously. He had a ring light involved.

you know, and an erection and probably some makeup on the erection and he shot it to where you could see how big his apartment was behind the dick, maybe for scale, maybe because he was insecure. Who knows? I didn't do any of that. I just stood up right off the couch,

dropped trow. I was like, well, here you go, buddy. Been watching Squid Games for the past six hours. There you go. I've been farting on my balls for half a day. I call this the pad tie filter. I think that should be the rule. With dick pics.

If you're going to send the Hulk version, also send the Bruce Banner version, you know? This is what it looks like the rest of the time. Like a snail that just went through chemotherapy. Gamma chemo, obviously. For the Marvel heads, all right. I travel quite a bit, man. I'm, you know, I'm vaccinated because medicine's kept me alive all my life. that's it.

Podcast hosts haven't. But it's crazy out there, man, because it's, the insanity's reach both sides. You know, there's, like for every hardcore, fucking gun-loving,

one American news watching, fucking, I ain't getting the damn shit. I ain't getting a vaccine that's a liquid microchip. Going to insert itself into my semen,

turn all my babies into AOCs. I ain't getting that shit. Hell no. for every one of those fucking lunatics you walk around the East Village here in New York you'll find some quadruple mask twat at a bar for no reason like oh you're not sanitizing the bar stools

you're literally murdering millions this is why abortion should be mandatory mandatory I like when yes ma'am get that shit hell yeah let's do it in front of the children right lady learn them young to appreciate life

do it at schools. Let the kid on the honor roll that week flip the switch on the vacuum. I just wanted to see how dark I could go. I just wanted to see how dark I could go. I just feel like right now this country is so divided. We've just got to embrace that at this point.

Let's stop trying to come together until we miss one another, I guess. Because it's not working any other way. Every state needs to do, like start looking at the U.S. map like thumbnails on Pornhub. You understand? I'm saying there's something there for everyone

but not everything's going to be for you. Only go where they're doing shit that you're into, you understand what I mean? You wouldn't click on an anal pounding clip and be outraged at all the butt fucking this should be vaginal sex only. No,

that's Missouri, okay? This is double anal penetration. Also known as Florida. All right? You don't like it, don't go. come to New York, we're human centipeding up here which is hot if you get to choose the links

okay, that's the new fuck Mary kill choose who's ass you eat and choose who eats your ass I would chew in front I'd have Sandra Bullock and behind me Rudy Giuliani get in the gold tail your lips defend my anus like you did trump that you know how to defend a piece of shit with your mouth

All right, so there you go. That's enough of that. I love you all dearly. Thank you very much. Thank you to Tom Poffa, to Rick Crum, to the band. Sean Patton, everybody. Sean Patton with a Christmas message for you all. And now a word from our sponsor.

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You don't want to seem insensitive. I get it, but cut the shit. It's Christmas time. Trust me, if all we celebrated was Hanukkah, I wouldn't be trampled by fat tourists in Santa hats stampeding to the M&M store. It's Christmas time, baby. Sean's New York Christmas Adventure.

There you go. Maybe you'll stay all the way through New Year's Eve. If you think for a second I'm going to Tom Square and watching that ball drop, you are out of your fucking mind, okay? People get there at two in the afternoon and stand around all day eating trail mix from their pockets and pissing themselves. Okay? It's like a redneck petting zoo.

Fuck that next. Sean's New York Christmas experience. Feel the magic. Happy holidays, everybody. I mean, come on. I'm no idiot. The owner of the club is Jewish. John Patton, everybody.

And now, please welcome our next comedian, the very talented. I love him so much. You just had a huge show at Carnegie Hall. Gary Goldman, everybody. I feel like I got a little extra. I feel like I got a little extra warmth. No, I feel like you're familiar with my work,

and you've approved of it thus far. Anyway, you could get some sort of stage hand over here to move these things for the... Honestly, it's like, I'm looking out in here, adding up Tom's take and he can't afford somebody to just come in and move these to the side that would

what are you guys getting paid not enough right not enough for your talent you guys are extraordinary I felt like the the last band they had here they used to they would talk during my set

and it was undermining and maybe they were talking about cues and things like that and I also noticed They didn't do it during any of the non-Jewish performance. I just, forgive me, I just got back from the front and the war on Hanukkah. We're losing, we're losing.

Hanukkah is losing. They even moved it up this year to Halloween. It started on Halloween this year. Maybe we could extend the festivities and people, I don't know, when do you guys usually ignore? Hanukkah. Mid-late December, right? And this year, it's intersecting with Thanksgiving.

Next year, in 5782, that's what happens once we take over. It's not 2021 anymore. It's 5782. We will erase Jesus. Like you have erased Purim, Tubeshvat, and Simcha's Torah, as well as

That's a little game I played called Two Jewish Holidays and a phlegm remover. It's like two truths and a lie, but Semitic. Pro-Semitic. In 5782, Hanukkah is on the 4th of July.

There will be Roman candles in the menorah for the first time. Hanukkah is the origin of Hanukkah we had lost to the Greeks made a comeback celebrated the only

we thought there was only enough oil for one night miracle of miracles the oil lasted for eight nights that's that's in 400 BCE okay

that's how politically correct I'm going to get I'm going to make B.C.E. it means before the common era which I love I mean the Jews are just such in strong deep denial like we're just and by sheer coincidence

the common error starts the moment Jesus Christ was born we had no when we here's the interesting thing that you people have swept under the rug Jesus was a Jew okay Christ is not as

last name, it's his title, it's his position. He was a, and not just Jewish, Jew E. Okay, beard, this, Pais, yeah, that, yes, yes, yes. This was your, this is your Jesus. This is your Jesus. He was a full-blown, filthy. Why did they bring gifts?

Because it was a bris. They were making, Jesus is Schmeckle holy What do you... Oh man. What do you think that foreskin would fetch

at auction? You think the shroud of Turin. You know what? I put in a shroud of Turin reference and these fucking C students

these CCD dropouts. You think the Papa fans are erudite? Ugh. You know, listen, you tolerated him on NPR. You didn't embrace it. You didn't embrace it because you felt he had gotten too highfalutin for you.

Let me tell you something. I may have lost you. You've lost me. I'm at that age where, if you don't laugh, it's you. It's not me. It's not, who would be a better judge of whether something was funny? Someone who spent five nights a week for 28 and a half years on stage here. Thank you. That's how everyone should be enjoying me right now.

Doubled over. I do admire Jesus. I kid and I joke and everything like that, but everything, this is complete earnestness, everything you need to know, Sermon on the Mount, doing to others. The whole basis of empathy, which I think is, in short, guys? It really is. I have, I don't know what it is.

I have hyper empathy. I, and I live in the wrong city for that. New York City. Oh my gosh. There's a tragedy on every corner. The good thing is, you can't feel sorry for yourself for a moment. The other day I was... I was...

Sh! Sh! The other day I was lamenting the fact that my last special didn't win an Emmy. it was deserving. That's inarguable. And I was feeling sorry for myself. I was, what was meeing. And then I walked by a guy on the corner of 57th

in Lexington. You may have seen him. He doesn't have a head. And yet he had a fruit stand. And you're all thinking, I bet you jacked up the prices to take advantage of the competitive prices.

I came out of Gristides and looked at his price for apples. And I screamed, I've been robbed. Some people are uncomfortable about laughing at the man without the head. But I had a signal set up with Rick and Tom before the show. If there was anybody in attendance who lacked a head, I told them to let me know. And as I took to the stage, I made sure Tom didn't go,

which was our signal. All right, let's talk empathy. Let's talk how empathy has affected me this year. Actually, it was before the pandemic. I went to a... Here's what's happened. I can't enjoy close-up magic anymore. Which sounds like a non-sequitur,

but it's a sequitur. I'll explain. I love close-up magic. It's my favorite form of entertainment slash athleticism. It's extraordinary. And of all the people that ABC's World News Tonight

with David Muir has looked in on during the pandemic, I find their lack of profiles of pandemics effect on close-up magic to be a huge oversight.

This is a group. I can't pull a half dollar from your ear at six feet. I went to a close-up magic. It was moving. It was, it's traditional, but his twist. He did the pick a card, any card. I picked the Queen of Diamonds.

He then handed me a Sharpie. Asked me to sign the back. I signed the back. He then took the card, put it into the deck, shuffled it extravagantly. He even did the bridge. The bridge. The shuffling technique

that keeps me from saying yes to your invitation to play poker. I can't do it. I've tried. I can't do it. Cards go everywhere. This guy does a bridge. He didn't even put it on a table. He just did it in the air.

Then he took the cards with my Queen of Diamonds with Gary Goldman on the back. Put it into this pocket. From this pocket, he removed in orange I screamed how I just saw you put the

and now you're implying it's in the center of the orange some people say how do you know it was in the orange because I've seen magic before he didn't show me the orange because he was concerned I had scurvy you can't tell from looking at me that I'm vitamin seed deficient like so many

right like so many British sailors in the 18th century I'm just going to do a quick excerpt from my One-person show that's opening at the Cherry Lane in two weeks. It's called Mommy Look. It's just a theory I have that every one-person show should be called Mommy Look. You show me a four-year-old on a diving board screaming Mommy Look. In 14 years, I'll show you a theater major.

If my mother looked up from her People magazine once while I screamed Mommy Look, I'm not here. You are, but it's probably Ryan Hamilton or some other really funny guy. I wouldn't need this approval. Anyhow, he says to examine the orange, make sure it hasn't been doctored. What can I prove without an MRI? I know what's going on in the center of it. I'm just, I don't know how, because I signed it.

It's not any queen of diamonds. It's the one I signed. And he unpeels it, sure enough, uncrumples a queen of diamonds with my signature on the back and says, and I'll never forget this as long as I live, is this your card? I was awestruck. Right?

The trick is astonishing, but the humility. That is not me, my friends. I gloat. I gloat. When I played high school basketball, if I made a jump shot over you and your coach in order to stop the bleeding called timeout,

I'd run to your huddle, stick my head in and say, I suggest you bring in someone who can guard me. And the ref would come over. son, you pull that again, I'm gonna, I'm gonna tee you up. I said, pull what again? Giving sound advice? So if I pull your card from an orange,

I gloat after making a jumper over a 6-2 white guy. If I pull your card from citrus fruit, I'm not, in this you can. I'm removing it with a flourish. Look familiar, fuck face. Magic! Now where does the empathy? come in. Where's the empathy?

Well, he's standing there, is this your card? I wanted to hug him. I was blown away. But my empathy suppressed the jubilence. He said, is this your card? All I could say was, I cannot fathom how lonely your childhood was. The

isolation must have been excruciated. You said, is this your card? I heard Mommy look. Merry Christmas, everybody. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Gary Goldman, everybody, Gary Goldman. Are you having trouble sleeping?

There are a lot of meditation apps out there, Matthew McConaughey, Giano Reeves, but none of them work. When you really need to relax, you need the meditation app from Tony and Carmela Marone from Staten Island. And now introducing the new Marone Sleep App, Christmas edition. Hey, it's Carmela. And it's me, Tony. for downloading our meditation app Christmas edition Ho, ho, ho, ho, like and

subscribe. Tis the season to unwind and shit, so just try and forget the stresses of the year. Yeah, just relax. There's nothing to worry about no mores. Yeah, unless your kids want that

fucking Xbox PlayStation fucking thing, which is getting impossible to find. You got it, Tony. You said you could. I'm trying. I'm trying. Well, try harder. No one gave me shit when I was a kid. I was lucky if I got a fucking orange from my dad. Well, an orange isn't going to cut it, Sandy Claws.

Anyway, breathe. Yeah, breathe and shit. Okay, everybody just relax. Sit under the glow of the Christmas tree with the ornaments and the baby Jesus. And tell your kids to shut the fuck up and stay in their rooms for 20 guys. Damn minutes. Yeah, your parents are trying to meditate, you little shit. Okay, let's all take a deep breath.

In and out. In... And out. I smell something burning. Someone's burning a goddamn candle. I told the kid's not to burn any fucking candles. That ain't no candle. It's my holiday perfume. Nutmeg and pine needles. You like it? Yeah, it's not bad.

I got it in the grab bag at work. What else you get in that grab bag at work? All right, cut it out with all the hanky-panky. We're still doing the app thing. All right, all right. Okay, everybody, picture yourself at the North Pole. And you're sitting in Santa's workshop. But it's after hours.

And all the elves are done working and shit. So it's real quiet. And breathe. What? You're eating my... Christmas cookies, you fat fuck. Oh, they're so fucking good, Karm. They're so fucking good.

They're not for you. Then who's? Not you. Why do I lose? Because they ain't for yous. Now breathe everybody. They're for company. Fuck. They are good, though,

right? So fucking good. I crunched up little pieces of candy canes and smushed them into the dough. I was like a little cookie-making raccoon. Nice job. You really can't bake. Yeah, not like that whore I saw you talking with at the mall. Whoa, easy. Breathe, everybody. Breathe.

I'm just saying she better watch his step or I'll smush her into the dough. I didn't even touch her. I don't even know her. You better not. You ain't giving me crabs for Christmas. No way. I want something nice this year, something fancy. Like earrings from Zales. Hey, were you snooping? Maybe.

Well, sorry, Kahn, but those ain't for yous. Tony! The new Marone Sleep App. Christmas edition. Order today, you fuck. Rosebud Baker, isn't she great? The next portion of the show is brought to you by alcohol. Forget Santa, reindeer's and Jesus.

When you're an adult, the only miracle you can count on is alcohol. Make a list and check it twice. There's only one thing that will make this season nice. Alcohol. Putting the magic back in Christmas. And now it's time to check in with our reporter in the field, Tom Poppa, in a segment we call Out in America. Tom?

Thanks, Rick. This week I returned to New York City and decided to soak in the holidays and become a tourist in my own hometown. I wanted the whole experience, the crowds, the overpriced shows, and a hotel the size of an iPhone case. Have you ever sneezed in a New York hotel room and had strangers on both sides say God bless you through the walls?

I have. Why are hotel rooms in New York so little anyway? Was there a time when the only tourists were munchkins? I know we're not supposed to use the term munchkin, but I'm not talking about little people. I'm actually talking about munchkins, like the tiny people in the Wizard of Oz. They had curled up shoes and baby faces

with handlebar mustache. and apparently they love to visit New York during the holidays and stay in tiny hotel rooms where they use the sink like a hot tub. Have you ever seen a little person walking down the street and try to catch them for good luck? I have. Why are little people so angry anyway?

I'd love to be bite-sized. You don't even have to buy a car. All you have to do is get yourself a little saddle and you can ride your dog to work like a horse. I decided to go to the tree lighting at Rockefeller Center, but I made a quick stop at the lobby bar for some eggnog.

Eggnog reminds me of my grandmother, thick, creamy, and filled with whiskey. I love Christmas at my grandmothers. All year round, she kept a little decorated tree on the table in the living room, covered with a sheet. On Thanksgiving, she pulled a sheet off and yell,

ta-da, it's Christmas. I miss her always, but I was excited to see the big tree lighting, so I grabbed another eggnog and made my way out into the crowd. Have you ever gotten so drunk at the tree lighting that when a policeman tapped you on your shoulder, you realized you were actually singing Christmas carols

at a traffic light? I have. I bought a hot pretzel in the cold night and stood at the edge of the crowd watching the skaters down below. There was a guy twirling around in a Santa hat cutting off families like he thought he was at the Olympics. A woman from Long Island yelled,

we're not impressed, we're annoyed. I threw my pretzel at him and kissed her on. the lips. She invited me to join her at Fridays for some deep fried shit in a basket. I was all in. I'm happy with any chain restaurant that works hard to fill you with so much cheese that your heart explodes. If I ever opened a restaurant, I'd call it Mondays and serve nothing but tequila and paper cups. My date's name was Dolores. She was visiting from Michigan and wore her hair up in a giant white stack like a wedding cake. She had big red lips that were decorating her glass with every

sip she took. As we were walking, as we were talking, an off-brand Elmo came into the bar. He wore a dirty Elmo head, flip-flops and boxer shorts with the flap open. Delora said, looks like Elmo really loves Fridays.

The manager called for security and suddenly two very large men appeared. Have you ever watched a bouncer rip off a drunk Elmo's head as children screamed in horror? I have. As they dragged him out, Dolores gave him a high five and say,

I fucking love New York. After a couple drinks, I kissed her goodbye and wandered out into the night with a face covered in Dolores' lipstick. I walked outside across the street and saw a munchkin standing outside a tiny Irish bar with a red and green neon sign. I raced across the street,

scooped up the munchkin for good luck, and went inside. It was like Times Square vanished. It was so quiet, no music, no talking, just the sound of my footsteps walking up to the bar. The bartender served me a whiskey without asking.

A little old lady sat next to us. She had a knitted cap with a sleigh bell on top. We clinked glasses. I wished her Merry Christmas. She gave me a knowing smile and said, Tadda. Have you ever had a beautiful moment ruined when a munchkin bit your

ankle like a pit bull? I have. And that's my report from New York City. Merry Christmas, everybody. And now, welcome to the stage, my good buddy, Dave Hill, everybody, rock star, musician, author, comedian. Give it up for Tom Papa.

I think it's so great that you're still at it, Tom. Sorry, I got a turn, right? Give it up for the band. Wow. I love it. Love with you guys. Hey, Tom, when the band does, like, a song by themselves, do you keep that?

the show or do you edit it out? Wow. No. No, as long as you guys are still out here, for whatever reason. Sit in with me tonight. Wait, check this out. I went to the

Center today. Shut the fuck. No, thank you. I don't know why I lashed out of you. No, thank you. Who said thank you? That was horrible. What's going on with? Let's, Tom, Let's start over. Introduce me again. No, no, I'm sorry.

I love you, too. I hate myself. That's the problem. No, I went to Tom's like, this is a holiday show. Come out with guns blazing like a motherfucker. So I went to a guitar center today, and I got this new pedal. Check this out. Watch. Wait, say you sound like, watch, watch. In the beginning.

It makes everything sound really important. A stranger came to town. Whatever you say, it sounds, but anyway, how am I doing on time? I'm off on that. Dude, give me a little vamp in B. See if you guys can keep up. Also, this is the last, just, all right, keep going, keep on. I meant to say, since this is the last come-to-pop of the year,

just whatever jazz is inside you guys, just let it fly. Jazz all over the front. All right, bring it down, calm down. All right. I didn't say stop. Jesus Christ. Where'd you get these guys? Craigslist time?

I want to talk to the people. I know I'm really excited. My favorite come to pop every year is just what a guitar player, that thing you're doing? Just less of it. You're not getting paid by the note. No, I love the holidays. So I love the holiday show is my favorite.

come to pot. I love the holidays. I don't even care what holiday it is. Give me any holiday. I'll just celebrate the fuck out of it, you know. But my favorite holiday, I have to admit, is Christmas. I love Christmas. I love all the presents and the sex. But if I had to pick, like, a third

thing about Christmas that I love, it's that song, The Twelve Days of Christmas. Do you know it? The Twelve Days of Christmas. Sing it if you know it. Not right now, but just in your own time. Anyway, I got to thinking about it, and I figured, like, the only way this song that 12 days of Christmas ever could have come into existence is if everything in that song actually happened to someone at some point in history, and I figured it was, like,

a really, must happen, like, a really long time ago, like, way back in the 80s or whatever. And the way I figured it happened, like, there's this guy. I figured, like, I'll call him Mitch, right? And Mitch is just, like, walking around mine his own business when he runs into his buddy, what's your name, sir? Audience, what's your name? Sebastian, okay, not what I'm sorry.

So, um, all right, fine. Mitch runs into his friend, Sebastian, as if that's plausible, but say, just, Mitch runs,

guys, just calm down. Mitch runs into Sebastian, and Mitch is like, hey, Sebastian, Merry Christmas, and, And Sebastian's like, yeah, Merry Christmas. And Mitch is like, yep, December 25th, can't wait.

And Sebastian's like, actually, Mitch, I meant to tell you, like, we've all been talking. We decided this year, instead just doing the one day of Christmas, we're going to do 12 days of Christmas. And Mitch, like, that sounds pretty crazy. But all right, well, how's it work? And Sebastian's like, well, you know your true love, right? And he's like, yeah, Karen, right? And he's like, yeah, Karen, right? And you'll give a gift to your true love.

and your true love will give you a gift and then on a second day you'll give each other a gift and the next day and so on and so on it goes on for 12 days and Mitch is like that sounds pretty crazy but all right come in and then he's like all right I'll see you later Merry Christmas or should I say Merry Christmas is hot and Sebastian just laugh politely at that

is a bit weird anyway so okay so September 25th Mitch is at home and also for reasons I should have explained they'll become apparent momentarily Mitch and his girlfriend Karen are in a long-distance relationship. This key, I know, right? Yeah, you're freaking out.

Calm down. But, okay, so December of 25th, ding-dong, Mitch goes and rings the door. It's the delivery. I got a package for Mitch. Who, who's it from? And the delivery guys, it's from Karen. Oh, that's great. My true love.

What's you bring me? And the delivery guy's like, it's a partridge and a pear tree. And Mitch is like, what the fuck is that? And he's like, um, uh, partridge, that's, uh, kind of bird and a pear tree. I think it's pretty self-explanatory. He's like, okay, um, I guess you set it down, uh, next to the couch. Uh, I'll see you tomorrow. And Mitch goes and calls Karen.

He gets the machine. He's like, hey, Karen, um, got the partridge in a pear tree. Um, never saw that coming in a million, trillion years. Um, hope you got this sweater. I say you. Um, Merry Christmas. Love you so much. Call me.

And, uh, it's, uh, next second day occurs, December 26. Um, um. doorbell rings, and he goes to the door, and it's the delivery guy again, and he's like, got a package for Mitch, and yeah, me from yesterday. And, uh, and is, what did you bring me today? And he's like, two turtle doves. And Mitch is like, wow, I guess there's some bird

theme. I never saw. That's pretty weird. I'll see you tomorrow. And the delivery guy's like, there is one more thing. Um, what is it? And he's like, it's another partridge and a pear tree. And, and Mitch is like, no, no, no, that's impossible. That was yesterday. He's like, no, it says right here. No other partridge and a pear tree. He's like, okay, um, I guess fine.

it on the other side the other end of the couch. I'll see you tomorrow. He goes and calls Karen. He's like, hey, Karen, hey, I got the turtle doves and the partridge and a pear tree. Again, believe me, when I say you shouldn't have, I hope you like the earrings I got you. Give me a call as soon as you get this,

third day of Christmas, ding-dong, hit the delivery guy. He's like, today I bring you three French hens. And Mitch is like, oh my God, well, I guess I'll be having French eggs. And delivery guy, Lee last. play late that and he's like all right I'll see it tomorrow and he's like there's a few more things and what else this is like I have two more turtle duffs and Mitch is like

I find those fucking things over that and I'll see it tomorrow and it's like there's one more thing and Mitch is like what it's like I have another partridge and a pear tree and Mitch is like you bring that thing in my fucking house I'll stab you and he's like sir I'm just I'm just to deliver I'm just doing my day and I'm put in there you motherfucker and uh fourth day of Christmas ding on um come on guys just because I do cool stuff Doesn't mean you should. All right.

What day are we on? We only have two more else to go. Fourth day of Christmas. The other guy comes in. He's like, what did you bring me? Mitch is like, what did you bring me today? Today I bring you four calling birds. And Mitch is like, what the fuck is that?

And he's like, and then the delivery guys, I think they make birds sounds like, oh, and how? And he's like, oh, all right. Like, all right, throw him over there. I'll see you tomorrow. He's like, there's a few more things. I've got three more French hens. Mitch is like, no, they're not even French.

I say, bonjour to them all day yesterday. They just looked at me. Mitch is a bit of a fucking idiot. I should have said that's tough. So I'll see you tomorrow. And he's like, no, a few more things. I got two more turtle doves. He's like, no more turtle doves.

I didn't want to say this, but the turtle dubs have been violating the French hands, and I don't believe it's consensual. It's very hard to watch. I'll see you tomorrow. He's like, no, one more thing. I have one more partridge and a pear tree. He's like, fuck off.

And, okay, fifth day of Christmas. Don't worry, I'll skip a few days. 5th day of Christmas Delivery Guy shows up as you today I bring you 5 golden rings and Mitch is like Oh my God thank God it's not any birds The delivery guy's like well you're not going to like this at all And then

Four calling verse three church And now Okay fast forward to the eighth day of Christmas Ding dong And this delivery guy And Mitch is like what'd you bring me today And he's like today I bring you 8 maids of milk and Mitch is like

Now you're talking And Deliver Guy's like well I'm glad to hear you say that Where should I put the cows and he leads in eight cows and the maids start milking them and milk is squirting all over the place like they're working at some sort of sexy car wash

and brings all the other person and is in fast forward 11th day of Christmas like what did you bring me today you fucking asshole and he's like I bring you 11 pipers piping and the piping itself would have been annoying enough but they only play Danny Boy and like there's like Danny Boy

and he's like stop playing Danny Boy and he's like stop playing Danny Boy and um Okay, 12th day of Christmas. 12 day of Christmas. He said, what did you bring me today? He's like, I bring you 12 drummers drumming. And as if the Piper's weren't annoying,

the drummers are all just like talking about snares and symbols and having these really dumb arguments. Like, who's better? John Bonn from Ledz Up and or Neil Pryt from Russia. And it's like, duh, it's fucking John Bonn. You fucking idiot. So anyway, Mitch freaks out. He said, I'll be right back.

And what I didn't, and I neglected to tell you, he had been saving all the golden rings the whole time, He goes to him pawn job. He buys a gun. Right, right. You see with his head, he comes back. The delivery guy is still waiting. He's like, I'm going to need the signature for all this stuff.

And Mitch just, like, blows him away. Then, like, he's, I know. He's a good guy. And he's, like, horrified by his own actions. Turns the guns on himself. Now we have a murder or suicide. Merry fucking Christmas, everybody, you know? And, uh...

So then the cops show up, and they're like, oh, my God, what's going on? What are all these cops? I was doing here. And, um, landlord shows up. And he's just like, you know,

he's like, well, forget it. Mitch's not getting the deposit back. You see, all the, just bird shit, and the turtle doves are just, anyway,

and then Mitch's family shows up. And if you think they're upset about Mitch being killed, when they hear the thing about the deposit, they just lose it. Karen finally shows up. Turns out she had been in Cancun

the whole time. And, uh, it wasn't even getting the bad things. Anyway, then Sebastian shows up. Yeah, you, from earlier, four hours ago. He shows up and he said, hey, everyone, what's going on? He startles of the cows, the cows stampede.

Everyone's dead, except for the turtle doves, who are just pumping away the whole time. My point of the story, my point of the story, is that's why we just celebrate just the one day of Christmas. That's the point. Keep rock. We stop. We should keep...

What should I tell the band? Keep playing. Keep... Guys, keep... I need say stop playing. Let's do two verses. Yeah, let's go. We got to wrap up the big show.

Did you guys enjoy yourselves tonight? Thank you so much for being here. This is a drunken song that we need your help on. And then we got to quickly get out of here because there's another show going. We went really late. Why are you looking at me, Tom? Not you. Thank you. We wish you all a Merry Christmas. We hope you have a good time. This is a drunken, drunken Christmas song that was written a long time ago by Halmore and Bill Fredericks in the 1960s. And then Bob Dylan covered it. It's called Must Be Santa. Go.

Who's got a beard that's long and white? Santa's got a beard that's long and white. Who comes around on a special night? Santa comes around on a special night. Santa comes around on a special night. ears that's white Must be Santa Must be Santa Must be Santa Santa Claus

That's your part Who wears a flutes and a suit of red Santa wears a boasted a suit of red Who wears a long cap on his head Santa wears a long cap on head suit that's red Special night Beard that's white

Must be Santa Must be Santa Must be Santa Must be Santa Santa Claus Who's got a big red cherry nose Santa's got a big red cherry nose Who lasts this way

Ho ho ho ho Santa lives this way Ho ho ho ho Cherry nose Cap on head Suit that's red Special night Beer that's white

Must be Santa Must be Santa Must be Santa Must be Santa That's our show Everybody let's hear it for all our friends Here at the Village Underground The Papa Trio

There you have it kids that's the big show. I hope you enjoyed it. A little fun crossover, getting a little come to Papa, sliding into Breaking Bread. I hope you had a good time. Make sure you go and watch the new Netflix special What a Day. It is streaming on Netflix right now. Even if you've watched it, maybe just turn it on when you go to bed and let it stream all the way through so the people at Netflix know that a lot of people are continuing to watch it. And thanks for all the feedback on the special, by the way. It's very nice to see. You always get a little hesitant when you put something out there, but when you get all the love back like that, it means a lot. So thank you again.

Happy New Year. Hope you enjoyed the show. Take care of yourself. Good night.