Breaking Bread with Tom Papa - Episode 154 - Dan Ahdoot

Episode Date: May 9, 2023

If you love comedy and food as much as I do get Dan Ahdoot's new book 'Undercooked!' Listen and we'll tell you why.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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From binge all episodes exclusively on Paramount Plus It's time for Breaking Red with Papa Hey! Don't you You know, it's how we go. Hey, it's time for Breaking Bread with Papa. Hey, don't you know. Hey, it's also a show. Welcome, everybody to another edition of Breaking Bread with Tom Papa.

I'm Tom Papa. Thank you for being here. Thank you for coming along. This is going to be a fun episode. We've got Dan At Hood program, a very funny comedian, a very funny writer. He's got a new book called Undercooked. How I let food become my life navigator and how maybe that's a dumb way to live. I love Dan.

He's very knowledgeable in all things food. It's perfect for our podcast. He likes food and comedy as much as we do. He was the host of Food Network show. He also has his own podcast, Green Eggs and Dan, which I did, which had a very funny element to it, where you're supposed to take a picture of your refrigerator, of what's inside your refrigerator,

then he goes through it. And what's funny about it, he's not kind about it. He called me out on all the different mistakes I was making. Olives, like a can of olives with some saran wrap over it. Very funny and a really good book. You're really going to like it. It's called Undercooked. So we're going to jump into that with Dan.

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Sign up for a 14-day trial and start protecting you and your loved ones. A-U-R-A-O-R-A-O-R-com. Certain terms apply. Oh, look at this. Here's a book for you. Yes, we remembered it. We're all in this together, so make some room is my new book, and it's coming out on June 6th, and it's available for pre-order right now.

And if you pre-order right now, wherever books are sold, you can go to Amazon, whatever, not only will you get this hilarious and thoughtful book, but you might help me get on to the New York Times bestseller list, because we need to sell. a bunch before. It's a whole complicated thing. This is our third book, and we've never been on the list before, but each one keeps doing better than the next. This might be the one. Just so we can be like, yeah, we made it onto the big kids list. Again, the book is called, we're all in this together, so make some room. Also, I'm touring around. If you are in Cincinnati, Cleveland, a huge show in New Jersey at the Performing Arts Center in Newark.

We just, that one's not until October, but we just released the whole second half of our shows available now at Tompapa.com. That jersey one is huge. You know, there's all different rooms at the Performing Arts Center where I recorded my special, and now we're playing the big room. And so we want everybody to come out to that.

Very exciting. We had a great show in Town Hall in New York, and now we're going across the river to the Performing Arts Center in Newark. Lots of dates. If you are a human being and you are listening to this, I'm definitely coming near you. We're everywhere. It's going to be really packed. Also, we've got one in Southern Jersey.

If you want to come to Atlantic City, Memorial Day weekend, that's going to be pretty cool. I think I have to bust right back. I should be going to the beach. We'll figure it out. All right. Let's jump in. Dan is a great comedian, host, writer. We've got to jump in.

He's got a lot to say about wine, about food, about his life and food. So enjoy Dan Adhut, the book again. Enjoy. Great to see you. Great to see you as well. Sorry about the crutches. No, it's okay. You know, I had to reschedule and you put me in my place and here I am.

We break legs. Breaking legs with Tom Papa. Congratulations on the book. I'm going to hold the book up right. Toot Sweet. We tend to babble right off the bat. This is probably going to be backwards. Is it backwards, Joey?

I think it's normal. Oh, that's good. It's not a fun cover. It's a great cover. It's a great book. How I Let Food Become My Navigator and How Maybe That's a Dumb Way to Live. It's really good. Congratulations.

Thank you. I appreciate it. It's very thoughtful, it's very funny, it's very, and it's everything that we love around here, which is food. Yeah, food-centric, fun. Yeah, this was weird because I'm not a, I'm not like an author.

I mean, I am, but I'm not. Yeah. I feel like a little bit of a fraud. I know, yeah, you dip into this world, and you're like, yeah, I know exactly where you're at. It's just, I feel like as comics, it's always weird when people refer to you as something other than that. When they're like, as an actor, I'm like, I'm not an actor.

Right. I am figuring it out as I go. What was your process? I'm like, I don't know. I took an Uber here. There is that comedian thing that you find in show business, you kind of like slip into these different areas, which you know you don't belong. You're like, why am I at this big event, like launching network shows and why

am I on set? And I just had a book event that I had to do. And I rolled in there. I was like, yeah, it's my third book. I'm pretty much an author now. And I was with two people who, like Nelson DeMille, who's written 30 books. Right. Like millions of copies.

And Tess Kitridge, same thing. And I was just like, oh, they're authors. I'm like here with my pamphlet. Look at me and my 200 pages of Holo. It's so funny. It's true. Did you like the process of writing it? You know, parts of it I did, parts of it I didn't.

It's always very, it's this cliche of like, I like, I don't like writing. I like being done with writing. Like there's nothing I've done that's ever, that's been more satisfying in my life to be done with. Yeah. And just like have out there. Yeah. It's still surreal to like go to a bookstore and be like, do you guys have undercooked? And they're like, by Dan Adit?

I'm like, yeah. That'll work. Like, yeah, we do. I'm like, that is crazy. It is pretty cool. It's very bizarre. Yeah. I loved it, though.

I mean, it was, the fun thing is, especially for guys like us that are nuts about food. Yeah. I'm like, am I, like, part in food and part in comedy? And people are like, I'm, I just have to find the 12 people that are also into food and comedy. You know what I mean? Like, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, you know, it's, you know, it's really, really, really good at, at two. You know, but if you're really, really good at two things, then your chance of success are a lot higher. Because you're specializing in two things.

Yeah. That's automatically. So like, think about it. Within like very good comedians who are also very much into food, there's like five of us. Right. Four of us. Right. Yeah.

You know? I know. So that kind of, it, I don't know, it takes a lot of the competition out of things. Yeah. So I don't know. I like this. I'm into this kind of specializing in two things. Because I felt like I was in the closet for a while about my obsession with food.

Because, you know, like comics, especially when you're starting out. Like, it's not cool to be like, I took all the money I made for that show and went to a tasting menu. Right. I'm like, you idiot. Why'd you do that? Yeah. So I felt like, I don't know, but I love finally being able to merge these two worlds is, like, very satisfying to me. Yeah.

No, I mean, you really. if you love these things, you just do these things. And then it's only when you're like sitting there at night thinking, could this be the marketing end of it is when you like start to like, and that's not the way you should think about it at all. Right, right. But it, but you know, but you can't help it. Did you cry when you were writing it?

A lot. Yeah. Because there's a cut. There's some, you know, very deep stuff at times. Yeah. And not in a way that the readers should think in any form like, oh, this gets heavy. But there's just definitely things that are meaningful, I know, to you. Yeah.

It's very lighthearted. And even when you deal with the heaviest of things, there's still like a joker around the corner. But I can tell that you mind it. And yeah, you had to have cried when you wrote it. Well, thank you. No, I definitely did. And what was weird was I wrote a lot of the chapters that were, I left off a lot of the heavy chapters because I was like, I'll get to that one day. Yeah.

And I remember there was a moment where I was like, I think I'm done writing. I think I'm done with the book. And I was just because it felt like I was done. Yeah. And I was like, how do I know if I'm done with the book? And I called my agent. And I'm like, I think I'm done with the book. But I'm not quite sure.

She was like, well, you're contractually obligated to 60,000 words. I was like, oh, okay, cool. Let me just add them up. And I never had my word count on while I was writing. It just, like, had separate chapters. So I started an Excel spreadsheet. Yeah. And I started adding up the word counts.

And it was due in a month, the first manuscript. And I had 35,000 words. Whoa. I'm halfway done with my book. I lost my shit. But it actually made it, like, I canceled Thanksgiving. I canceled going back to New York, everything. And I just went into the lab and, like, first I googled authors who famously finished books quickly.

Yeah. So that I could, like, get inspiration. It was like, if Scott Fitzgerald could do it, I can do it. And then I just started plowing through, like, the really heavy chapters. And it was really, I was like, I was crying, but like, it was also like crying on a deadline. Yeah, yeah. Which was nice. Yeah.

So I couldn't like really wallow in it as much. Yeah, like forced it. Yeah. So that was very, very, very helpful. The weird thing was reading the book on tape. Yeah. I don't know. On tape.

Did they say that anymore? Yeah. Audio book. Yeah. Because, you know, you're in a booth and it's like you're reading it and you're living it and it's so emotional, way more emotional I thought it was going to be. It's basically things you should be saying to a therapist. Yeah.

But instead, there's like some sort of. spectrumy sound engineer on the other side of the glass who's like, Dan, can you do that again? I think you're crying? I'm like, okay, I'm sorry. Just give you a second. Yeah, just one guy. Do that again?

All right. Do you not hear that, Dan, you're crying. Do you not hear that? Well, you dedicate the book to Sali. Yeah, my older brother. Your older brother who passed. And you mentioned that you never went to. therapy after

he passed. He was a great guy and an older guy and he just went quickly from cancer and that it's kind of like your therapy was food. Right. And diving into all of that. I only bring it up because yeah, not going to therapy.

The book is very much, I'm sure, writing down these thoughts that were just thoughts in your head about your life. And now for the first time they're coming out, it's pretty deep. You're mining something that nobody else has touched. Yeah, I guess so.

I mean, and it's very cathartic, but it was also very, it is strange because I'm kind of playing my own therapist in it a little bit. But, and there was a lot of things that I did. discovered there about a lot of a lot of the stuff in there i didn't really know until i started writing of like oh shit maybe that's why i was like that in that relationship right um yeah so i i i look i i spent all that money that i should have on therapy on food yeah i think ultimately it got me to the same place uh you know circuitously yeah but um yeah i mean

Again, so if you never go to therapy, just know that there's a book in you somewhere and you'll make a lot of money writing a book. Yeah, 100%. It was a very interesting thing because when your brother passes, your parents, seems more specifically your father, who he had this great food relationship with and was introducing you at a young age to all these great types of food and going to the city coming from Long Island. and going into New York and all of that great celebration of that connection with food. And then after your brother passes, they dive a little further, deeper into their religion and start eating kosher. And all of a sudden, that's kind of gone.

And, you know, when I was, I tried to go vegetarian for a while. And the thing that knocked it out really was the bond with my Italian Bolognese family. I was like, I think it's more important to eat this bowl and ace than it is to make my vegetarian friends happy. Right. You know what I mean? And my artery is happy. Yeah. I mean, but it really is.

That's a huge, it's not a trite thing. Like your parents all of a sudden, your dad going kosher, that's kind of, oh, man, that was what we did. Yeah. I mean, I'm a middle child, and my older brother and my younger brother got their attention the way that they did. My older brother was an amazing athlete, just like straight-A student. My younger brother was, you know, cute younger brother. And I was like this chubby little kid. And the only, like, I basically got into food because it was the only way that I could, that my dad didn't have those bonds with my brothers.

Right. So I saw an opening. I'm in. And I'm in. So I really, really got it to food. And it was, yeah, it was the best way to bond with him. And then he went kosher and it was like that. Like, he and I used to go to restaurants alone, like in the city, like leave the whole family.

And it was just me and him. And it was great. It was wonderful. Yeah. And so then after I lost that, I kind of, again, instead of therapy, filling that whole. Yeah. I filled that, that food relationship myself. So I started to eat, take any money that I made as like a starting out comic and,

spending it on, you know, all the great restaurants that were in New York in the early 2000s, which was like a really fun time to be in New York. Yeah. And then when that wasn't enough, I started hunting because, you know, as a hunter, you could, you're eating foods that no one else can eat. It's as local and sustainable as it gets. Yeah. And then that wasn't enough.

So I started interning at restaurants. And I interned at the spotted pig, the Michelin-star restaurant. And, you know, it just started seeping into every single part of my life for better or for worse. Yeah. You know, it's not all just, it's the thing. It's like a lot of times these crutches that we use end up having a lot of positive, you know. Yeah. It's like I love, I love restaurants.

Like they give me so much joy. Yeah. Right. Exactly. Like, I'm friends with a lot of chefs and restaurateurs and being able to walk into the hot place and get the hot table. Yeah. It's like really, oh my God. I just remember, I have a story that you, I think you would really enjoy.

Nice. Okay. That's why we're here. A couple weeks ago, I can't believe I didn't think about this before coming at it. A couple weeks ago, I was in New York for the book release party of this book. And my buddy runs major food group, which is Carbone, Teresi, all those restaurants. Oh, yeah. And so I was going.

to, with my brother to Terese to have dinner, which is like the hot spot now in New York. And we get there and, what's her name is sitting there? Who's like, God, I always forget her name. The most famous actress in the world. Merrill Street. Merrill Streep.

It's sitting there. And I'm like, whoa, that's pretty cool. And then I go to the bathroom and I come back and my brother's like, dude, if you were just Star Trek before, you're not going to believe who's sitting at the table next there. And it's your buddy Jerry Seinfeld. Now, I've never met Jerry before. And I was obviously very starstruck.

And he's like, dude, you got to give him your book. Because I had the book there. And I'm like, I'm not going to do that. And he's like, you got to do it. I'm like, dude, I don't know him, but he just seems like he, he seems like he hates it when people come up to him. Like, that's the type of guy he is, you know. And I could see a couple people were going to go up to him, but they stopped him. Stop them.

The staff stopped them. Stop them. Yeah. You know, there's like this fratty group of guys. Like, dude, can I go take a picture with Jen? Like, he likes to be left alone. Yeah. Which thankfully is so.

Your instinct is correct. And then my brother just like sikes me up. He's like, we're all just particles on this little fog called Earth. We're going to die. We're all going to turn into dust. What's the big deal? And I'm like, yeah, fuck it. So I take the book and I start walking towards him.

And whoever he was sitting with for dinner had gone. had gone to the bathroom, so he's alone there. And I got up to him and I was like, hi, Jerry, I've been to stand-up comic for 25 years. So, like, I'm thinking like, okay, he'll know I'm not just like a normie. Like, I was like, I'm a comic, I've been a comic for 25 years. Here's my business card. Yeah.

Here's my. It was so cringe. And he's like, oh, okay, that's a long time. And I was like, yeah, listen, I just, I don't want to bother you, but I just wrote this book and I really think your wife would like it because, you know, she's into all the food stuff. Yeah. And he's like, wait,

you just come to restaurants carrying your book? I was like, no, we just had like a book release thing. And he had this uncomfortable. Meanwhile, you could tell the whole staff,

like, take the shot. Take the shot. And I was like, so, anyway, do you mind if I leave me? He's like, no, leave the book,

leave the book. I was like, okay. And then I went back to my seat. And my brother's like, aren't you happy you did that? I was like, no. Not at all.

That felt so dumb and weird. It's so hard, yeah. I hate it. Do you think he left with a book? I don't know. I have no idea. Probably not. But I walked into a restaurant here in L.A.

Madeo at the original location. Yeah. And it's this great place. And my parents were out. And the only time we could get in was like 5 o'clock. And I was like, let's just do it. It's so worth it. I just love being there.

The food is, it's, it become a little bit of a classy scene. Yeah. But forget the scene. The old one, right? The old one that was downstairs. Yes. And then they built some building on top of it. On sunset.

Oh, now they're on sunset. They moved Madeo to sunset, like across from the comedy store. Oh, really? Yeah. So that's the second location of it. Because it was down by, like, Rodeo. That's right. They moved it in Beverly Hills.

I think they moved it from there, too. Oh, so. And now it's up by the comedy? Oh, that's interesting. Yeah. Have you been there? Is it any good? I haven't, no.

Whatever it is, it's not going to be what it was. Right. No way. And it was so great. It was just that, you know, when things work, they just work for so many reasons. And, yeah. Anyway, I walk in and Steve Martin and Diane Keaton are the only two other people in the restaurant in a booth. And it ruined the whole meal.

It ruined the whole meal. Because the whole time, you're like, that is, as a child, there was, he was one of two of the most important comedic forces on my life. Yeah. And now he's 20 feet away. And I can't go up to him because it's going to ruin. It's going to add a story that's going to be a shitty interaction. He's there at five for a reason.

Yeah. He could have gotten in at eight. He doesn't want to be bothered. And but you're just, the magnetism is just like. It just draws your brain towards them. And I never, I wasn't going to go up, but the whole time I'm thinking, go up, don't go up, go up, don't go up. And I was just like, let's just order and eat and get out of here.

Give me my spicy wiggartone and get me out of it. Yeah. Yeah, it's always a weird thing of going up to people. I never, I never do it. I know. But I'm always very nice when people come up to me. I always think it's like, and I think it's mostly because I know how much it sucks to do that. So I want to make it an easy experience for them.

Well, it's also like the different times. Like if someone means a lot and you can, and you know because you're in the same business that short and sweet, something as meaningful as you can and get out. Yeah. Is the way to do it. But while you're eating in a restaurant, getting into your car, you're hurting your kids, there's times not to do it. Right. And there's times where you roll into the comedy cellar and he's there, okay, you know, we're just on the street. There's those moments.

But it is really uncomfortable. It is really hard. So bad. Yeah. Yeah. I like to think that he took the book home. His wife came back and saw the book. Was she eating with him?

Mm-mm. So, yeah, he brought it back and she saw it and was like Long Island. Jewish Food And now it's on the bookshelf Right? Yeah, why not? Why not?

Why not? Come on. All right, so you talked about hunting. Yeah. Now, first I want to ask you something that's just personal. First of all, thank you for reading the book. Like, it's, for those of you at home, Tom has, like, Mark, He's marked pages.

He's actually read it because, like, you can tell when you go do these interviews and the person hasn't read the book. Yeah. And you kind of don't expect them to. Yeah. Because it's a book. It's a time commitment. Yeah.

It's like when someone gives you a book for a present, I'm like, screw you. Now, your present is to steal 20 hours of my life. I know. This better be good. Yeah. You mention, because I have this in my life and in my house, and there's two elements that interest me. You have two freezers.

One is a wine fridge and one is a freezer, excuse me, filled with meat. Yes. A lot of it, elk and wild gaming, that kind of thing. Yeah. All right. So I have, I don't have a wine fridge, but I do, I am more into wine than I have been in any part of my life. give me when you are when you are how do you manage your wine that I'm going to drink and wine that I'm going to stick in the fridge and forget about.

So I have a two-tiered system. All right. Okay. This is why I'm asking the questions because I knew you'd have an answer. No, I appreciate it. And when I got into wine, because I would say in the last five years is when I started going deep, I think the pandemic started and I was like, I'm going to be getting drunk every night, so I might as well learn something.

And I'm not spending money anywhere else. So let's make it good stuff. So I started buying a lot of wine, and I turned my basement into a wine cellar. Like, I went hard. Yeah. But in doing the research, you realize there are some grapes that are wonderful for aging, and there are some grapes that are better fresh. Right.

Like just younger vintage. So I started getting into like gamet and, uh, Crubo Jolet and stuff like that, which I love drinking. And I love them on a daily bait. It's like a good daily drinker. Right. The best bottles that you can get are like 40 bucks. Right.

You know, 30, 40 bucks are the best ones. You can find great ones for like 20 to 30. And that to me is like a wonderful, like, this is my daily drinker. Because the thing is, if you're getting a Bordeaux, if you're getting a Cabernet Sauvignon, if you're getting a, you know, a Barolo, those guys, the cheaper ones are not going to be good in a lot of ways. And they're also, they're going to drink or they're going to be way too young and they're not going to taste good.

Right. So I have a two-tiered system where I'll buy those, the ones that need aging, I will buy them and forget about them. Right. And then I'll have like the freshies like a Sauvignon Blanc or most white wines, I think, are better younger than older anyway. Yeah, yeah. I don't drink a lot of white wine.

Yeah. But yeah, I think it's like zoning in on those grapes. And then like you, I love Brunello, which I'm sure you do too. And then you just find a couple of years that are like the eight years. So 2016 Brunellos are all killer. Right. And whenever they come up, I'm on like, you know, all the wine texty things. Yeah.

You know, I'll, and I have a lot of wine friends now that we're on like a group text again. It's like, buy this one. Oh, really? Buy that one. Oh. But my big thing is I love getting a deal. I love unsung regions that, because it's so easy to go, oh, I'm just going to buy a bunch of aged burgundy.

Right. Cool. You're paying 10x what the wine should be because of the market around the world. Right. And it's just like not as fun. Yeah. You know what I mean? No, I know.

I mean, there's something really nice about getting something and having patience around it, you know? Yeah. And like my brother-in-law has a small wine cellar and him and his wife are pretty good collectors. And I give him wine and he writes my name on the label and he sticks it in the wine cellar. And like this Christmas time, he broke one out that was like five years ago that I get. And it was like night, there was something, it made it just more special because there was patience around it. And we shared in that timeline and all that kind of. kind of stuff made it made it more worth it i love that yeah yeah it's very special like that it's

also you know it's i love getting three bottles of something opening one then waiting a couple years opening it again oh that's nice that's a fun fun move yeah um i try not to get too uh preachy about pairings i feel like that's like i feel like that can like get into pretentious area really quickly. Yeah, and it's so, and it also is so personal. It's like literally, your taste for eating this and drinking this

is going to be slightly different from mine. Yeah. You know, that part, yeah. But you know, it's interesting, just as you're talking about, like anything in a wine list in your, at a restaurant that you love, is drink now.

Yeah. Right? It's kind of interesting to think about because you look at it sometimes, especially if it's extensive and it's like, whoa, these are, the years are varied. Like, there's everything, right? Yeah. It's, I got to say my move lately is bringing my bottles and paying the corkage fee.

Oh, really? Yeah. Oh. That's interesting. Because the more you learn about wine, the more you want good wine. And it's like, then, and I know the prices now. So it's like, all right, I'm going to this restaurant. If I want, like, to drink a $75 bottle of wine,

it's going to cost 300 bucks at this restaurant. I don't want to pay 300 bucks for that. I'd rather bring mine, pay the $40 corkage. I did that last night at Mother Wolf. Oh, you did? Yeah. I met the Mother Wolf guy. Evan Funk?

Yeah, I was at a thing for Chris Bianco. Okay. When they did... The new pizza place? Yeah, it was at the new pizza place. And it was, I think, a Netflix profile, the chef's table kind of thing on pizza. And Joel McHale was there, and I met the Mother Wolf guy through him. Everyone loves that spot.

It's really good. Which one? Mother Wolf or Pizza Re Bianca. Mother Wolf. Mother Wolf is great. It's so goddamn expensive. Is it really? I mean, you leave there.

You're like, you'll be two people. You'll eat, you'll drink, you'll leave. And it's all pasta and pizza and pizza. You're like, how did I just spend $400 on flour and water? I don't forget. How did he do that? I know.

I was in a restaurant last night just near here, this Mexican place, and with like a newer, you know, take on it. And the sea bass, sea bass, and I know this is because of the scarcity and is what's going on right now, but $70 for an entree of sea bass. For one, not for two, for one.

I was like, I am, can we curse on this podcast? Yes. I mean, go fuck yourself. Honestly. I know. It's killing me. Yeah. I feel like Brandzino, I don't know.

First of all, what it is that people are so obsessed with Brandzino. It's good. It's a fun. It's a middleer. It's a middle. It's a feature. Yeah. Yeah.

It is fine. Not a headliner, but at Mother Wolf. Yeah. Their Branzino's $80. Right. What's happened? That's insane. But I did go to the supermarket to buy halibut the other day.

My wife is barely a pescatarian. And one of the things she likes that I make is grilled halibut. $50 a pound. What? For halibut, swordfish, and I think C. Like they were, whatever's happened in the supply chain of that. Can we still use the supply chain? an excuse? I don't know. I was just thinking that the other day. I actually used it. I used it on

somebody. I forget what it was. But I was like supply chain. They're like, it's over. It's just, it's, you know, things are still cocked up in some places. But I said to the guy, when is the halibut coming? This has been spiked at that, at this for a long time. Yeah. And he didn't have an answer. He had no answer. There is a place actually close to here that is the dry aged fish guy. Have you been there? No. Okay, so this guy really interesting. He's dry aging fish, which sounds gross, but in fact, it helps dry out the outside of the fish. The inside gets a little bit, like the proteins relax, and the flavor is really unbelievable, and the skin crisps up amazingly. Wow. You're paying a premium for this. It's very expensive,

but it's a very good once-in-a-while thing. And, And the pro tip is they also have fish collars there, which I love fish collars. They're so fun. There's so much, like, fun little fat nook and crannies. And they have those that are dry-aged and they're very reasonably priced. So I'll go there once in a while, get a salmon collar, yellow-tail collar. Oh, they're so good. Oh, cool.

You're going to have to give me the name. Yeah. Yeah, it's so damn expensive. I just don't, and, you know, I love fish, but it's fish. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like, you know, it's so true. Yeah.

I have a very good wine story for you. Okay. So this is kind of what we were talking about before, like we're at this intersection of comedy and food, and that kind of, it's exciting for a lot of people. So I'm on this show, Cobra Kai. Right. And Ralph Machio, who's like, childhood idol, always been an idol.

Yeah. Is like, he's a huge food nerd, and he follows me on Instagram, and I would see that he would like, look at all my food stories. And I'm like, huh, this is kind of, this is a fun stalker. Ralph Munchy, I'm into it. And so we always, you know, we'd see each other once a year for shooting. And he'd be like, oh, you know, we got to go eat. You know, we got to go eat somewhere.

Like, I love that you're into food. I love food. And I'm like, yeah, let's do it. And, you know, these famous people say this a lot of the time. They don't really mean it. Right. But he lives on Long Island. And I would fly into New York.

I'd text him, hey, Ralph, I'm. I'm in town and he'd be like, oh, I'm not around. I'm like, he was just saying it. So the last time I was in New York, I text him. And I'm like, hey, I'm in New York if you want to hang out. And he's like, perfect. I have Sunday off.

I'm like, amazing. He's like, what time do you want to go eat? I'm like, you're Ralph Machio. You call the shots. He's like, let's go to the steakhouse on Long Island at 6 p.m. I'm like, fantastic. I love it. Sunday morning, I'm like all excited.

Yeah. He sends me a picture of a bottle of. 2006 sassakaya I don't know it Sasakaya is like a super tuscan just insanely expensive wine Oh boy Okay it's like an 800 900 dollar box

Oh my god And he's like just took this out of the cellar Cannot wait for dinner I'm like holy cow amazing You just run to the restaurant Yeah I'll be in the parking lot So I get to the restaurant 15 minutes before dinner

Okay Yeah and I go up to the hostess and she's like, your reservation? I was like, yeah, two people. She's like, under what name? I was like, I think Ralph Machio? She's like, oh, yes, of course, Mr. Machio. Hold on one second.

They bring the manager over. He's like this Italian dude and like, you know, stocky Italian guy and like an ill-fitting suit. And he's like, hey, we love Cobra Kai. Thanks for coming. We love Ralph here. And I'm like, thanks for having us. I was like, listen, this is my credit card.

I'm paying for dinner tonight. Nice. And he's like, no, you know, this is Mr. Machio's restaurant. He's going to love it here. he's like he's going to get so angry I'm like no I don't want to get into a fight you have no idea about wine this man is bringing me take this credit card no matter what I'm paying for dinner

no questions he's like you got it so macho walks in and it's like Long Island Jesus just entered the building Oh really? People are like flocking like they just can't not go up to him and he's like he's super nice about it the guy ferries us over to the best table in the house

he's got his little like wine valise He takes out the wine, puts it, that Somalié comes over, can't believe it. He opens it with these, like, tweezers to make sure the corkle them off. Pours a little bit for each of us. We take a sip. It's completely corked. You could tell right away it wasn't even a question.

It's completely corked. He's like, it's corked. I was like, yeah, I think it is. He's like, oh, my God, Dan, I'm so embarrassed, and I wanted to show you how great Long Island food and drink can be. Don't worry, I'm going to make it up for you. Johnny, bring me the wine list. Oh, no.

Oh, no. And I'm like, no, no, no, no. And he's like, what have you been drinking lately? What are you into? I'm like, well, you know, the wine doesn't really matter. It's just the friends that you keep. He's like, I've been loving Napa Cabs lately. And I'm like, I'm completely screwed, right?

Oh, no. He's looking at the list. And he's like, what about this? You know, the stag, no, what was it? It was a Schaefer, whatever. He's like, this was like a $600 bottle, a $700 bottle. And he's like, let me ask the Somalié. He's asked him.

Of these three, what do you think? And I'm just like, I need to call my credit card and be like, get ready for, you know, an exorbitant in charge. He has to go to the bathroom. He just sees you running out in the parking lot. Oh, man, this is tricky. It's tricky. This is tricky. And the Somalia is like, you're just going to have to eat it.

Is this what you're thinking at this point? You're just going to have to. Yeah, what am I going to do? I was like, do I go and tell the manager that I just said under no condition is that? Do I be like, hey, listen, I'm taking it back. No, you can't. You just have to write another book. You need to get cast in another show.

I know, I know. But it was so much fun. And then he started ordering and he was like, okay, let's get the steak for two, the caviar. Like it was such a great bit because we were both trying to be nice to each other, but just making it worse for each other, you know? What happened at the end? Well, the bill comes. It comes straight to me.

Yeah. And he's like, what are you doing? I'm like, I got this, man. It's on me. And he's like, what do you mean it's on you? I was going to show you. I'm like, dude, don't worry about it. I got it.

And then like a flash went over his face and he like realized what happened. He's like, wait a second. You got here early because of the wine, the picture of the wine that I sent you. And I was like, maybe. And we both start cracking up. And he's like, that's going to be my move from now. And I'm just going to send a picture of an expensive wine before a dinner. And I'm like, yeah, you should call it the macho.

He's like, yeah, you just got machio. That's amazing. That's great. What a great story. The only flaw, and it's on the restaurant, not you, I feel like when you get there early and drop the card and say, on me, there should be no bringing the bill to the table. It should be just you take care of the, add 20%,

you'll maybe sign when you go to the bathroom, whatever. Like the real elegance of that move. Yeah. All right, should we go? Wait, where's the bell? It's all done.

And you're out. That's, I never even, that, I like that. Yeah, that's a good move. That's,

that makes that move even, uh, cooler. God, I even messed up on the move, huh? It wasn't you.

It wasn't you. They shouldn't have, they shouldn't have, they should, it's on them. Yeah. Have you ever searched your name on a search engine?

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Certain terms apply, so we be sure to check the site for details. This is the world we live in, kids. Everything in our lives is out there on the web, so you want to protect yourself and avoid all the hassles. So thank you to the good people at ORA. All right, let me ask you, let's go to your other freezer. Oh, yeah. So you've got the other freezer, which is the deep freeze. The deep freeze.

And you hunt and you also gather. Yes. And there's stuff in there. Now, I have a freezer in my garage that came from my pal Joe Rogan, who it was a stocked freezer. And when he moved to Austin, he's like, I'm just going to, if you can come get the freezer, it's yours. You can have all the elk in it, and here's a freezer for you. Okay. And I was like, oh, that's amazing.

And for some reason, I have not been able to get in touch with him, like in the last six months. And I'm running out of elk. Oh, really? Yeah, I'm like, I'm down. Wow. It's really sad to look in it. What is your, how do you stock your freezer? If your friend Joe Rogan has lost your number.

I mean, okay, so you want to get more elk. Yeah. And you don't want to go and shoot one. No. I mean, I'm not opposed to going and shooting one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, reading about your hunting stuff is actually, we're kind of in sync.

Like, I could see myself doing it. I don't think there's anything. I think there's something great about it. Yeah. But that's, that's a longer project. Well, here's the thing. Your choices are, so you can't, in America, you can't buy game meat.

That's wild game meat. That's hunted. There's laws against that. And I initially thought, because in Europe you can go to restaurants and it's game season and at a restaurant they'll be serving you you know like hunters will go during the day I got these birds and they'll buy them the restaurant will buy them right and they'll serve them in the restaurant which sounds so cool and romantic right and we don't do that here and I always thought that

that was kind of messed up but I was talking to Steve Ronella who is a probably the number one hunter conservation list in the country and he was saying it's actually really good because in the late 1800s, early 1900s, a lot of these, like, commercial hunting was a thing. And, like, in New York, it became really chic to have bison tongue. So all these guys would go and just, like, kill all these bison, rip the tongue out, leave the animal there. And they were, like, on the verge of extinction.

Oh, good. So then these laws were passed to bring the numbers back. And the numbers now in America are just, like, unbelievable game numbers. all these animals that were like on the verge of extinction. Yeah. Because of commercial hunting are like thriving because of like proper land management. That's good. So you're,

you cannot buy wild elk. And wild elk and farmed elk are going to taste very, very different. I'm assuming he gave you wild elk that he killed. Yeah. So. Because it yields, you know, it's 700 pounds. Yeah. It's nuts.

Yeah. Your choices are, well, I can give you some. I have some still in my fridge. Oh, yeah. And then there's a lot of places that, you know, wonderful farms that sell, you know, farmed elk. Right. It's not as sexy as, you know, the hunted elk. Yeah.

But it's still pretty great. Yeah. Yeah, because there's no, like, factory farms doing elk. No, I know. Yeah, right, exactly. Like, you're not just having these beasts just on your farm. Locked up in a box. You can't lock these in a lot.

You can't. They're all pretty ethically, you know, harvested. So what else is in your freezer? So I have that elk. I have a deer that I killed in upstate New York. And I have a bunch of, like, influencer stuff that I've been getting. I get a lot of the influencer foods that I'll throw in there. Some, like, wild fish company was sent.

me a bunch and I just kept putting it in there. Right. And then I have a buddy who hunts who hates game meat, which is like, I'm like, why do you even hunt? So he sends me everything. Yeah. Which is great. And he like, he's like super rich and goes to like, he's like, I just went to Lanai, Hawaii and got this

very rare goat that you can't find. I'm like, send it on over. Oh, that's great. That's great. That's what I need. Yeah. Yeah, this is really killing me. More than, more than anything. I mean, Joe's a great guy. and we're good friends for a long time.

And there's like a personal thing of like, what's happening? Like, why aren't I connecting with him? But more than that, it's, he has to get me more elk. Yeah, yeah. That's, that's, I got, no, but I can, I'll put you on my list because I have a lot of people who will give me their game.

Yeah. All right. That's good to know. That's really good to know. The better thing, the better question to ask is, why are you guys out of touch? I don't know. I don't know if he's,

I'm supposed to go do his new club and stuff. and I don't know. He's probably just insanely busy. Yeah, maybe. He's got a lot going on. I don't know what it is. I hope we're still pals because I need to be in touch with him. He's just such a great guy.

You need some milk. Yeah, and I need some milk. It's a very funny hunting story that you have in there. What's really crazy I said I never thought of is how I don't want to give away what's going on in that story. but how expensive it is to go on these excursions. Yeah. It's big money. It's shocking to me.

Yeah. Because you think Hunter is, you think it's like blue collar salt of the earth? Yeah. Well, they are saving up a lot of salt. Yeah. It's super duper expensive. And all that gear ends up being, it's about this, it's more expensive than a ski trip. Like it's more expensive than going to Vail for the week and staying in a nice hotel.

Yeah, it's insane. Yeah. And you're sleeping on the ground. You're on the ground. You're eating like slop. Right. You just need so much equipment and it's so rare to get to these places. Yeah, the gear is nuts.

The outfitters, you've got to pay them so much money. Yeah, just the tip. It was like, what? Yeah. I mean, it's nuts. It is definitely, and the thing that you realize, because I went with my buddy Moe, who is my rich hunting friend I was telling you about,

who doesn't really love the game meet. Right. But he, you know, we were there and there was a couple guys there who were like super blue collar, like from rural Pennsylvania, worked in a spring factory. And these guys does not have a lot of money.

Right. And I was just like, you know, after a couple of days when we were becoming buds, I was like, so what's the deal here? Like how, why are you guys doing this? So they're like, it's like it's all they live for. And it took them five years to save up for it. Wow.

You know? Right. So it is like, it is an identity to a lot of these people. You know, it's like part of their identity. Could it be cheaper? Like, couldn't you just? The only way it can be cheaper is, um, so if you live in that town, like if you live in New Mexico.

Right. Or like if you live in upstate New York, you can go on, there's public lands that you can go hunting on. And that is a very inexpensive hunt. And that is actually a thing that we also do better than Europe because in Europe there's no public lands. There's just lands that are like on some fucking barons, you know, estate. That they rent it out.

They get some sort of tax breaks to like rent out their estate. Right. To people come hunting, which is just like cost prohibitive to most of the population. It's super expensive for everyone. This elk hunt that I went on in the book was like an expensive hunt for American standards. But, yeah, like, people in, like, Pennsylvania can, you just get your tag, which is, like, 50 bucks. Right. You have to still, obviously, buy the gear, buy the gun, buy the ammo.

So why was getting the tag such a big deal when your buddy was like, we got this? So if you're out of state, if you're from out of state. Got it. And also with big game animals, like with the elk, with some sheep, like Rocky Mountain sheep and whatever. they limited because of land management and how many they can kill. Right, right, right. It's like a lottery almost. Right, right.

And then you can win a tag and resell it. Oh, really? Like, there's this sheep one, these Rocky Mountain sheep that are like, people will, they'll give like two tags a year out for. And you can sell them for like $50,000. Jeez. $50,000. Yeah, it's like insane what people will do. that to me is like...

And that's for one season. That's, yeah, that's for one sheep. She's. And by the way, if you miss, if you don't get the sheep, you still have to pay the $50,000 for the tag. Right. It's insane. Oh, my God. But...

Wow, that's insane. It's pretty wild. So off to Europe, you have a very funny story in the book about Paris. Yeah. And... Rebounding in Paris. Yeah, rebounding in Paris. And you describe...

You describe this girl who you meet, you and your buddy meet for the first time. And there is very well-written description of just being blown away by the very French European beauty, natural beauty of this woman. And man, that really holds up. I went to Paris for the first time this year. Oh, nice. Yeah, like as soon as you got on the plane, there was like that. You're like, oh, we're going someplace different. Yeah.

This is someplace insanely different. But anyway, the, the Bacchanal, the complete insanity behind that trip, that is a magical, magical place to eat. Oh, my God. I mean, I know it's cliche because the whole world has done it and talked about it. Yeah. created all great art based on just the experience of being over there. But man, I had a couple meals that were just, like, bring you to your knees. It's true.

I'm curious where they were, but I do think it's also this, like, the charm of that city is, like, doing a lot of the heavy lifting. The restaurants are incredible and amazing. Yeah. But, man, the cobblestones, the lighting, just, like, the, the, The font of the restaurant outside, just the whole thing. Yeah. The cigarette smoke, like the smell of cigarette smoke. It's just like all these things add up.

And it's just let alone the food. I mean, the food is like unreal. Yeah. And it's insane. It's perfect. You almost can't make a mistake there. Yeah. And if you do have a dud meal, you want to commit suicide.

It's like, what have I done? It was like one time we were in Rome and we had bad pizza. It was shocking. Like it was so, it was our last night. It was just like the one stop to get closer to the airport, you know, after touring all of Italy. And we just walked in and it was like, it was like you couldn't, you couldn't make worse pizza. Yeah. It was like this doughy.

I'm like, where are we right? What has happened? This is raw dough with this like bad tomato sauce and chunks of cheese that weren't. melted. It was like, what is, what is going on? Wow. It was really like, it's the worst. It was almost like Italy saying go home now. Like, you've had enough. I ate at this place called La Mae Louis. Okay. And it's like 14 tables. Phil Rosenthal Tull gave it as like one of his six places to go stop in. Okay. 14 tables. tough to go in and we did it for lunch and it was just it's insane yeah it was just i mean you know

when you were listing all the stuff of like all of that is so well practiced yeah like it's all that like that place has been there forever yeah and these got you know career waiters and you know it was one of the only places where you weren't going to speak english yeah and i mean it was like $75 asparagus and it was worth it. Right. Right.

You know what I mean? But every element of it is so orchestrated and practiced and it's just it's, God, just mind bending. You know, and I think that whenever people,

I'm sure a lot of people are listening to this and they're like, this is nuts that these guys get off on this type of stuff. But, you know, I always look back at that study that experiences yield way more happiness than than like material things. To me like going to a restaurant, like a nice restaurant that I'm excited for, the anticipation, sitting down the pomp, all the fun around it, like those are so unforgettable and give me

so much joy that I'm like unabashedly like, I don't know, I don't know, I revel in it unabashedly. And I don't think it's pretentious. And it's funny, I had this comic on my podcast yesterday. And he's like a writer and he was like talking about going to Naka in L.A. And he's like, I just want to preface by saying I grew up in Compton. I live in Long Beach. And I was like, I've got crap.

He's like, like I know how ridiculous this is. But I also think it's like, I feel like comedians especially, like shouldn't shy away about liking fancy things. Because you know how hard it is to make money as a. comic like we we basically worked so we worked our asses off to get to a point where we can make money we're not just like working our way up in a company right we did we took a job that the chances of success are 0.000 yeah and we and we did it and it's and i feel like we should be proud of that right i'm not going to hide that right exactly you know no and it's also we don't get we don't get we very few of us uh get joy anywhere else like like that is kind of like our travel is our

work you know going in and eating like the like jeff ross turned me on to this is so stupid but right across the street from the comedy store um the sunset tower and i like never gaffigan was backstage and he's like let's go eat you want to go eat i know you don't eat late but let's go And I was like, all right, I don't know where to go because I do my set and I go back home. And that's my life. And Jeff Ross is like, you guys have to go across Sunset Tower. Tell them that I sent you. And we walked over.

And it was this great. Have you been in there? Yeah, it's the sexiest dining room in L.A. It's so great. And I'm completely, I told Fortune, Fortune Feimster I do my radio show with it. I told her, like I had discovered a place. She's like, you idiot. Like, everybody eats there.

And I'm like, well, it's a great thing to do after a set. But it was like, I had this great chicken dish. He had a great chicken pot pie. We had a nice cocktail. And I was like, and that's it. Like, other than your set, a meal like that with a friend, that you're done. There's no spending your money anywhere else. Yeah, it doesn't get any better.

No. Which brings us back to the wine that you were talking about. Like, again, like creating those little, like, almost time capsule memory things of friendship. Like I feel like giving a bottle of wine someone who appreciates wine or having a bottle of wine with someone who appreciates wine. Like is the best thing ever. I have wines in my home that I'm, I will only open with like friends who really get wine. Right.

It's like they know that and I know that. Right. And it's exciting. And it's a and you're getting kind of buzzed. I mean, what's better? I know. Exactly. I know.

I have a friend that's going to come to town next in a couple of weeks. and he loves wine and uh and i'm just my brain is just like what what what about i i've got to because you don't want to just serve up like purely what you like right but you also you also don't want to give him something that he'd be bored with it's like but you don't it but also because he's really loves it you're not just going to pommel him here's a you know $200 bottle. He'd much rather have a $40 bottle that he hasn't heard of from Sicily that's going to be great. 100%.

So it's like, it's going to take the full two weeks to figure out what three bottles should be on the table. Oh, I love that. I have a great wine guy if you need at K&L, who's fantastic at this. But yeah, that's the thing. It's like I have friends who are like my bro cab friends that I know if they're coming over, they want the big cab, they're going to get it. And then I have friends who are like,

the super wine nerdy, like, Master of Wine, like, study this stuff. And that is, that, I think, is so much more fun to shop for it, because you're like, there's this weird wine made in Georgia. Right. They may go out in stone. Stone cast a date back to, you know, 2000 BC. And it's so fun to do that stuff. Yeah.

Deep, that nerdy stuff. Now back to your, back to your, the title of your book. how I let food become my navigator and how maybe that's a dumb way to live. Yes. Everything you live and breathe says it's not. That is, you know, here's the thing. It's kind of like, I say this about wine too. I feel like to be able to finally be unpretentious about wine or food.

Right. You have to be the Michael Jordan of it. And then you can look back. It's almost like that thing about jazz. It's like, learn all the notes and then just forget it. Right. So I feel like I got to that place where it's like, okay, I've done it all. I've climbed Mount Food.

And I try not to tie every just like, you know, every emotion to it anymore. I see how that's like a fools game. Right. You know. And I see it now and a lot of younger people who are like, you know, starting their food instead. Instagram, their TikTok, you know, like everyone's a fucking food reviewer now.

I know. And I'm like, yeah. And they get into these, like, heady debates about sugarfish sucks. No, sugarfish is great. And I'm like, you guys, it's like you're, just enjoy the food. You don't have to break it down so much. But I do feel like part of realizing that is, unfortunately, it's like you have, you have to have done all of it to be able to look back and say it. It's like when rock stars are like, I've had sex with thousands of.

women and I'm telling you it's not worth it. You're like, I hear you, but I want to figure that out for myself. Right, right, exactly. Did you see the table? The table. Is that the name of the movie? The menu? The menu.

Oh, yes. Yes. Okay. Yeah, no, the table was the, the table sequel coming out. Right. The tables, yeah. Yeah, the menu. Yeah.

The menu, there's been a lot of shots at, this level of dining and people that may or may not like things like this for the right reasons and that kind of stuff. Like white. And also, you know, just taking stabs of people with money who just, white lotus is a little bit of that. Yeah. The menus, a lot of that. And triangle of sadness. Yeah.

It's a similar thing. Yeah. Well deserved shots. I think so. I actually loved the menu. I thought it was really good. And I think that, look, I will pay a lot of money for food. I spend, I'm going to say, a bigger percentage than most people that I know on food.

But nothing bothers me more when I know I'm being ripped off. Right. When something's expensive for the sake of being expensive, I think it's really unfair. And I think it's, and I think it's, and I think. I think there's a new place now in L.A. that just opened up. I don't want to call them up by name because I'm probably going to go there. But they're charging $30 for a cocktail. Wow.

And I'm like. Yeah. Yeah, why? That just angers me. That doesn't. Yeah, you can't justify that. Yeah. So, like, I, and also, like, yeah, I understand that part of it.

I understand the part of it that it is a classist thing, and I understand that, I understand all of that. And I think it's okay to make fun of. Yeah. But I also don't think that means that it's necessarily that all food is, or food culture is bad to the core or any of that. Yeah. So, I don't know, what do you think?

Yeah, I think, I think knocking down pretension is good. I think, I think, but there, like you said, there's, there are things that are worth it. Like there are, these are artists, these are people that are, I mean, the whole reason this is going on in the culture is because people push it, you know, and there are very, very creative people. And, you know, the things that people do, there's a price to be paid for that and stuff. But then, you know, like you said, it gets kind of muddied and abused. Yeah. And also it attracts certain people that, you know, that I don't think there's anything wrong with knocking stuff down, but also there are a lot of spots that are worth it. I don't think, I think, like you said, $30 for a cocktail, we know what's going in that cocktail.

Right. We know how much that vodka is. We know how much the olive cost and you got to shake it up. Yeah, what are you doing? Yeah. You know what I mean? You know, I will say the worst meal that I ever had was at a three Michelin restaurant. It was in, it was called Mugarets, very famous, famous three Michelin Star restaurant in Spain.

And it was just like, I just felt like they knew that they assumed that everyone was just a rich douchebag who all they wanted to do is say that they went to Mugarets. Right. And that's all it was about. Right. And it was such an uninspired, like, linduced. like limp meal all throughout. And I mean, I was with my, I was with my, my girlfriend at the time and we got,

we got into a fight at the first course. And there's nothing worse than fighting during a tasting menu. Because you have like three hours left. Oh, God. So that might have had something to do with it. But that aside, it was, you know, so some of my best experiences in restaurants, restaurants have been those restaurants, like a meal at Blue Hill, was like transcendent to me.

Right. Transcendenton? Transcendent. Transcendent. We got there. But then, you know, the flip, it's kind of like the flips, when you're playing at that level, you're either going to be super disappointed or super thrilled. Yeah. You know.

Right. Exactly. Exactly. I know that, and that was like that memorable one that I had at Louie and. in Paris was, you walk out of there and you're like, you don't even remember what you spent. And they weren't abusing you. There was a little pricier than whatever,

your normal lunch. But you walk out and it's like, oh, that, I'm going to carry that forever. You're never going to forget it. Yeah. I baked you this bread. That's amazing. Thank you so much.

You're very welcome. I was crushing on your bread hard when you were on my podcast. So I appreciate it. Can I take a, sniff? Yeah, absolutely. And then you said that when we sat down that you had some stories, I want to make sure that you've got them all in.

Oh, my God. Hold on. Right? You are a master at your crap. Is this like a sourdough bull? Yes. It's wheat and all-purpose from central milling. That is so good.

Yeah. It's going to, it's. Thank you so much. You're welcome. Enjoy it. Let me know what you do with it. I'll be curious to see how you handle it. I mean, you know, toast with butter is as simple as you can get

and is perfect a use as you can have. Yeah, so good. Sorry for the ASMR. You know, Joey, I was thinking this. You know, people don't like when we chew on the mic. Some people don't care, but most people get it. We get some complaints. Hot Wings on

on YouTube It's nothing but people chewing Is that because it's YouTube And it's not You're just hearing it? Like if you just hear It makes people upset Yeah probably

They're like in their car going to work Right And they just hear the chewing I mean I love hearing people chewing I don't care that You hear people chewing Yeah hot ones They're all like

Leaking out of their nostrils and stuff Right This is great I know Yeah we have one We have one person and they eat a cupcake on here and people Unfollow.

Because there is, yeah, because there is, I would like to eat more on this. If we are going to continue eating like, like, I think there's a cool element to what did you, what was your favorite snack as a child. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah.

And having that. Yeah. We're just eating the bread or whatever. I just like that we should be able to eat on this without, I don't know. I don't really. I will say a funny, a quick funny story, but I had to, in promoting for the book,

I had to do something called, or I was honored to be able to do a Grub Street diet. Do you know what that is? No. Grub Street is like New York Magazine's like food thing. Yeah. And they'll take like authors or whatever, and they write like a five-day journal of all the food they ate.

Uh-huh. You make it funny or whatever. Yeah. And I was like, I had it all mapped out. I was like, I'm going to go to all these cool places and I'll have, you know. So I go and I do a show with the laugh factor. in Long Beach and I'm driving back and I was gonna go I ordered this ramen like this fancy ramen back to my house and it's like my after the show I like to have a little romp and my tire I'm

like on the freeway going like 70 yeah my tire explodes oh god and I'm in the left lane and I'm like sparks are flying out oh no I'm like I'm like frogering to like try to like not hit someone and get off. Luckily, I get off. My car is making these godforsaken sounds. And I'm like calling AAA waiting for me. And like, they're like, it's going to be a while. I'm like, okay. And I'm like starving and there's an

apple bees right there. And I walked into the apple bees and had a meal. And it was like, I was like, this must be the old. And everyone on Grubbshoot Diet always like writes about the fanciest place and the coolest hot place. And I just like deep dived like this applebee's meal

what I had. It was just probably great. It was amazing. Yeah. The food is made in a lab that's like supposed to just tickle your neurons. Exactly. And you just survived on the 405. Yeah. It was great.

That's amazing. It's a little plug for my grocery diet. What was the highlight of that meal? So they have a new burger that they came out with, which was a, it's a Cajun Swiss Cheese mushroom burger. Great. Oh, great. Just like hit all the spots.

Yeah. It's so good. I mean, absolutely. It was awesome. The funny thing is, it was kind of in this, like, it was like in a, in a dangerous part of town. This place called Bell Gardens, which, like, you never have any business to be in Bell Gardens. And I'm sitting there and these, like, four Mexican dudes are getting hammered at the bar.

And they're looking at me and they're like, yo, you that guy from Cobra Kai? No, really? I'm like, I am. They're like, what the fuck you're doing in Belgar? That's amazing. That was the best part. Ralph Machio comes in pace for it all. He really is the best around.

Amazing. Well, this is really great. I'm going to get a lot of things from you. I'm going to get, I want your wine guy. I want your elk guy. And that's it. And then we got to go out. We have to go out and eat together at some point.

The book is undercooked. How I Let Food Become My Navigator and how maybe that's a dumb way to live. It's really funny. It's really thoughtful. You learn a lot. And it's just great. It's just like a nice, fun read. I really appreciate it.

And again, the fact that you read it is like, you read the book and gave me bread. What do you want? I'll give it to you. Come on. You're allowed to chew on this podcast for crying out loud. Let the man listen to some chewing for God's sake. You're the best. Thanks, Dan.

Thank you. All right. Well, there you have it. Thank you to Dan Adut. It's A-H-D-O-O-T. The book is called Undercooked. Go look it up. He's got some funny blurbs on here, too, from Phil Rosenthal, Hassan Minaj.

He's Michelle Boutot, Jimmy O'Ang, very funny people. All Love to Eat. It's really good. I hope you enjoyed it. Also, my book, We're all in this together, so make some room available for pre-order right now. Go to tompapa.com. Look up all of the dates. Look at this, Joey.

We get to add Dan's book to our pile of food books. It's pretty impressive. Pretty impressive indeed. All right, everybody. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next time.