Breaking Bread with Tom Papa - Episode 207 - Julian Edelman

Episode Date: May 7, 2024

Julian Edelman joins the table and talks moving to LA, his podcast Games with Names and answers a question from Matt Damon. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About Julian: Julian Edelman is a twelve year NFL veteran, three-time Super Bowl champion, and Super Bowl LIII MVP. He played with Tom Brady and the New England Patriots. Away from the field, he’s a producer, content creator, TV personality, and co-founder of Coast Productions. About Tom: Tom Papa, a celebrated stand-up comedian with over 20 years in the industry, has made significant strides in film, television, radio, podcasts, and live performances. Notably, he's a regular on "The Joe Rogan Experience" and various late-night TV shows. Papa's literary skills are evident in his books “We’re All In This Together” and "You’re Doing Great!: And Other Reasons To Stay Alive," a collection of essays, and "Your Dad Stole My Rake: And Other Family Dilemmas," a comedic look at family life. His latest stand-up specials are “Tom Papa: What A Day!” and "Tom Papa: You’re Doing Great!" on Netflix. Beyond comedy, Papa's engagements extend to hosting "What A Joke With Papa And Fortune" on SiriusXM and appearing on NPR's "Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me." His love for baking led to hosting the Food Network series "Baked." As an actor, he's worked with notable figures like Rob Zombie and Steven Soderbergh and has appeared in several films and TV shows, including the HBO film "Behind the Candelabra." Additionally, Papa has contributed as a writer to projects like "Bee Movie" and various TV series. Residing in Los Angeles with his family, Papa continues to balance his professional life with personal interests like baking. Get in touch with or go see Tom live on stage! Radio, Podcasts and more: https://linktr.ee/tompapa/ Website - http://tompapa.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/tompapa Twitter - https://www.twitter.com/tompapa Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/comediantompapa #TomPapa #breakingbreadwithTomPapa Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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I smoked a few when I was in Rome. Yeah. Yeah. Rome, Croatia, Paris. Uh-huh. I don't know. I've never smoked in my life. But I just saw everyone smoking.

I was like, I want to smoke. Yeah. It looks like the coolest thing in the world. Were you good at it or did you feel like? I smoke weed here and there. Uh-huh. Actually, it killed me because when you nail... You know, when you inhale, you know, marijuana, it's different than when you inhale tobacco.

Yeah. I feel like I'm on a, I feel like I'm in the movie or like the song, Billy Joel, a little Italian restaurant. Yeah. Bottle of red. Bottle of white. That back of that album, that was the stranger album. Yeah. And the back of that album is him at this table, kind of very similar to this.

and that was the supreme macaroni company in new york which was right by the port authority yeah my father used to take me there when it was great yeah in the front it just looked like this rundown like pasta shop and then you'd walk through that and in the back was the restaurant had to be cats walking around there was just like old ladies as the as the servers and it was just classic it was so great and my father had been taking me there for years. And then when that album came out, or when I was conscious of the album, I was like,

oh, that's the place. Yeah. That's the place. And it's since been mowed down. It's not there anymore. Yeah, a lot of... If it would have went to COVID, it probably wouldn't have survived either.

No, I know. So many of the great restaurants I went to. Yeah. Gone. I used to go to this place, cafe a sissy in, I think, Rentham, Massachusetts. And when you said a cat walking by, that's when you know you're in an old Italian spot.

Absolutely. Because this place you just have a couple of cats just walking by. Yeah. And he's sitting back eating a chicken parm and how are you doing? Yeah. And they're not, oh, all right. I guess I should feed you. Is it, is it how much, I mean, you're so, you know, your career in that one city for,

you mean so like joey's from Massachusetts and he's been freaking out from the minute I did your podcast and he was like please can he come in so he's really he's probably wet himself already when you leave and move out and go to another place is how much of your heart is still in the place

that you built your career well it's it's so crazy because I remember going to Boston for like my first three years. And I felt like I was, you know, really away from home. Yeah.

And then as soon as I started establishing myself and getting comfortable and embracing it, now when I leave Boston, I feel like I'm leaving home. Ah. You know, and any time I go back, I go back probably once, twice, every couple months, every other month. Yeah. I still have a lot of friends there, a lot of charities that I work with. We just did the Gronk's pickleball tournament that helps the Jimmy Fund and the Dana Farver Foundation and the Gronk Foundation. So, you know, I have a lot of relationships there.

Yeah. And I try to get back as much as possible. But, you know. But is it, like, for the guy who lives there, like Joey's uncle say or, you know, like, it's, they never leave. It means so much, like, as much as athletes, like, you know, I'm a. Yankee fan and it's like I love the Yankees growing up and all that kind of stuff and I realize as an adult it means so much more to the Yankee fan than it does to the Yankee you know what it's like it's important to them but for a totally different way you're at work you're doing your thing and

your career but the guy is just sitting there listening to talk radio non-stop and I mean it's just like that level like it's it's a it's a different world it is but you know I can came from the Bay Area and I love the San Francisco 49ers. Joe Montana, Jerry Rice, Steve Young, Brent Jones, Tom Rathman. Yeah. And I remember being that guy. Right. That fan.

Yeah. You know, as a kid waiting for the players to walk off the field just in case they might throw a glove or sign something. And so when I got to Boston and I took pride in playing for a city like a city. Boston. Yeah. You know, it's Boston, New York, Chicago, these big cold cities, Philadelphia is in there. Yeah.

These people love pro sports. Yeah. You know, and it's, it's an honor to get to go and have success with the franchise in a city like that. But Boston, you know, I feel like, you know, I take pride in it, too. Yeah. Yeah. I grew up there.

I go there when I'm 22 years old and I leave when I'm. 34, 35. Yeah, God. You know, so like a lot of the life lessons that you learn after being a teenager, I learned in Boston. Right. Cold is a key word. Cold.

It's for comedy, too. Yeah. You go to a place that has shitty weather. Funny people. Funny people. And they appreciate being inside. Like, you do a show in San Diego. It's like, yeah, it's cute.

But our life is pretty amazing when you're not here. It's like the NFL. Oh, you know, everyone was saying that with teams coming to L.A. Yeah. You know, you have to compete with a lot. Yeah. Out in these warm cities. You're competing with the beach.

You're competing with, you know, extreme sports. You're competing with movies. Yeah. And, you know, it's just different when you're in a cold city. Yeah. Work your 9 to 5. You come home. Yeah.

Drink your beer. It's dark. the Red Sox game. You only know what season it is according to what sport is on the TV. Right, exactly. Like, that's a city you want to play for. Yeah. And, you know, I would always, when it got real cold, you know, I would take, you know,

I would go out to, you know, warmer state to train and stuff. But I never got the brunt of that. You know, it's usually a couple times I had to stay back when I had surgeries. But it's that, uh, it's that February, March. April that is brutal. Right. There's a little hope with that 50 day. That 52 day you see people walking up, Boston flip-flops and shorts.

And you get slammed with the North Easter. I know. That just happened to me last week there. Yeah. Yeah. My daughters are going to school back east. Yeah. And they've been living here predominantly.

And my daughter's just like, you could just feel like it's April and it hasn't given them a relief that they want yet. Are they, they're California kids? Yeah, from New York, but then we were back and forth forever, but then landed in L.A. like for the rest of their schooling, like junior high high school. And they're like, no, we're going to East Coast. And it's, yeah, it's a thing.

Yeah, I mean, I got a little girl and, you know, it'll be 58 degrees here. And, you know, we were in there in a parka. People wearing scarves. I know. And it's just like... You lose it. You do, you do. But you don't get used to that cold.

Uh-uh. At all. No, I know. We talk about going back to New York and I'm like, I don't know if I could... I'd have to keep my spot out here so I could leave. I feel like it's been mild the last few years. Well, yeah. They were all talking about, I mean, everywhere I tour like Minnesota.

Yeah. Canada. They're like, it's not so bad anymore. It's like this global warming thing is kind of working out. All right, I have a, I have a question for you from another fan. He's probably more a fan than Joey. I was, got a text from Matt Damon yesterday. Did you?

Yeah. You told him Matt at a Ben Affleck? No. No. Oh, from, he was just talking some shit like five years ago about the page. Patriots Receiver Corp and I was still there. What? He was?

Yeah, but he didn't. It wasn't. It's been a running joke. It's funny. Try to give him on my podcast. Yeah. The hell, Ben. Fucking Ben.

Fucking Ben. He cut me out of his last movie. Did he? Yeah. We just... Son of a bitch. Gronk and I just did a parody. Oh, yeah.

On Goodwill Hunting. Oh, you did? Oh, yeah. So it comes out, see, I don't think I can give too many details. but it's going to be fun. I was Damon and he was Aflac. That's great. That's really funny already.

We'll see how it turns out. Well, yeah, right, exactly. Well, you know, they do love you. But I was like, so what should I ask from you? And he said, there's a great clip of him. I bet you find it on YouTube. I think it's the Seattle Super Bowl where he got so concussed that he runs back. to the huddle and as they're on the game-winning drive all he keeps doing is running into the

huddle and telling everyone how much he loves them so i guess the question is what's a good question you could spin out of that is uh do you always love your teammates that much or is it only when you have been uh used like a weapon grade when you have a weapon grade concussion that brings out how much that you love them in the softer side of you. Did you love them that much or was it the concussion talking? I don't think it was the concussion. I didn't have a concussion, Matt. All right.

Okay. You know, it was one of those things were, it was the final drive of a gang. Yeah. It was one of those things where you just, you know, hey, boys, I love you. these are the guys you put the hard work in, you get yelled at with, you know,

you're banged up in the training room with, you're in the weight room with, you see your teammates more than you see your family. Right. During a football season, like a lot more. Yeah. And so you know when guys are feeling down,

you know when guys are on a high, you know when guys need a, you know, a pick-me-up. Yeah. And I don't know. I was just one of those times, like, Just put the women in the children bed.

You're looking for dinner, boys. I love you all. I don't think it was a concussion. Nice. And it was my hip that was hurting on that play. Oh, was your hip? Yeah. So I took a, on that drive, that was like,

he's talking about a third and 14 where I took a shot from Cam Chancellor across the middle. Right. And then I tried to get up and run. And then at the end of the play, I struggled getting up. Right. On the punt return right before that, I took. took a helmet right to the hip and I don't wear hip pads. And so my hip, you know, when you have a hip pointer, your hip singes up, all your muscles

tighten up. But for each play, your adrenaline, you know, you can go. Yeah. But then as soon as your adrenaline goes down from the, you know, you're going back to the huddle, everything tightens back up. So, you know, it looks like I stumble and fall, but really like, if you look, I'm like, hitting my hip and I'm like, ah, right? Trying to get it.

Well, uh, it's a great. great answer. The love part. He also says that that guy was so tough and he's like my size. I mean, just fighting the good fight for us average size guys. It is pretty remarkable to watch your career just from a kid. Like you were a little quarterback. You were a little kid.

and but I knew guys like you, like when I was playing football, like through whatever, and you were always the most troublesome because you're like, okay, okay, that guy's going to kill me, that giant guy's going to kill me, that guy, who's that little guy, okay? And then I remember this one game specifically where this little guy came out and he just gunned it for my, he was a, I was a defensive end, and he was a defensive end, and he he just gunned it for my thigh and he was such a powerhouse and play one he took my thigh out of the game yeah i was like this son of it he was an undercover badass yeah and you had that from day one like did you have that attitude did you have that that thing like from i mean it

looks like you're very young when you were already kicking ass yeah i mean i grew up I grew up with an older brother that was like seven years older than me. Oh, boy. And so, you know, he used to just wop my ass. And, you know, I was every WWF character back then, now WWE, for him to practice tricks on. And, you know, when you're seven and someone else is 14. Yeah.

And, you know, your mom makes your older brother luggy around on the bike, you know, so you got tough. I would get beat up by all his friends. So I was never scared. of anything. Right. And even though I was undersized in high school, I looked at it like, all right, dude, I'm 14. I have a 21-year-old brother that beats me up. I'll, you know.

I can kill you. Yeah, you're eight inches taller than me, but if I get that first hit and you're going down. Yeah. Like that little guy that hits you in your thigh, you got to be willing to just take her out. You know? Yeah. Yeah. You know, I grew up on the football field.

My dad was a football coach. You know, and I remember before I was even old enough to play. Yeah. You know, being in the drill lines with the guys, you know. Right. You know, we're doing the drills. Yeah. So I always had a football like you and then just a recklessness, that fine, that fine line between reckless and aggressive, like I flirt with that a lot.

Right. So, yeah. It's kind of like a fighter pilot. I think some of that is built in. I think some of that is hardwired. Like you worked it and you had these, like your dad and your brother. But don't you think that there's also,

you just showed up that way? Definitely. Right? You know, and it was crazy. My, my, when I called my dad to let him know I was,

you know, I wanted to retire. Uh, uh, he, he goes, you finally smartened up. And,

I mean, and that's what it, you know, I always had that I could do. Yeah. Wasn't scared. Prove them wrong. Yeah. You know, and it gets to a point where you get to an age, you're like, you know, you calculate. I don't think I can do that anymore. You know, so. Right, right. There's definitely a couple screws missing, and you need to have that. And my dad said, I said fighter pilot because he said, we were talking about it. And when I told him, he goes, you know, that's what they used to say about fighter pilots. You know, the day that they feel like they can't hit that line of recklessness, they got to retire.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. And, yeah, so. When you, you had sports to kind of put that all in, and that's where you were proven and stuff, if you didn't have that, that you think you would have been in like bar fights every week? No, I probably would have been a, probably a parts boy at my dad's shop. Right.

Yeah. Right. Vacuuming and cleaning windows after the service cars. Right. Making sure the grease spots of the mechanic were wiped down. Yeah. It was an old summer job I had a couple times. So, you know, it's one of those things where I've always worried about what's been on my plate at that time.

instead of, you know, thinking about the past, which gives you stress and thinking about the future, which gives you anxiety. Right. And it's always led me to good things. So, you know, it's tough to always walk down that road of what would you have done if you didn't do this? Yeah. Did you have, at what point do you go from, all right, I'm, I can do this as a kid to, no, I think I can take this all the way.

Like, is there a point where you're like, is it from day one? You're like, I'm going to go all the way, or is it, did some? Well, for me, I thought, you know, I was always a confident kid. And I always believed in my ability. But I was never the biggest guy, ever the fastest guy. So there's always so many people out there, you know, there's a better guy on the team than me that I, or that they thought was a better guy. Yeah. That I always had to get into like a competition mode.

Uh-huh. And, you know, like I said, I always thought about that. And I would get obsessive and I wanted to do what I had to do to make myself feel like I belonged. Right. And, you know, it wasn't, you know, after my last game in college at Kent State, we were playing against Buffalo, University of Buffalo. I was walking up that field thinking it could have been my last game. You know, just because I was an undersized quarterback. I played in the Mac.

Yeah, I was very athletic and I ran for a lot of yards. I threw for a decent amount of yards. But, you know, it was very possible that I, you know, that could have been my last play. Yeah. You know, and then I went and hired an agent and CFL, you know, bought my negotiation rights, the British Columbia Lions. And I thought about, you know, potentially going to play quarterback in Canada. And, you know, my agent said, you know, I always had good people in my corner.

Yeah. That supported me that gave me confidence when I needed. And at that time, it was my agent, Don Yee. And he said, you know, if you get onto an NFL team, get you into a camp, it's going to be very hard to cut you. You know, so I heard that. And then that's when I was like, you know, you can do this. I can do this.

Right. You know. Because that's the same thing you've been thinking your whole life. Yep. A whole life. You know, and then you get drafted. You know, I was drafting the seventh round. And they drafted you as a receiver?

You're after me as an I mean Belichick, when he got on the phone during the draft, he goes, you know, I don't really know what you're going to play, but you can play football

so you're going to work you can't, you know. Right. So it's one of those things, like athlete. Yeah. And I mean, when they worked me out,

usually during the draft process, you'd go to the combine. I wasn't invited the combine, which is bullshit. Yeah, how come why? I'm white. Oh, really? I don't know.

We got six of them? Yeah. No, I don't know. I mean, I had some pretty... How does that work? How do you get selected for the combine? You know, the scouts all, they come up with the list. Okay.

And they invite you. And you have an agent that, like, throws your head in the ring? No, your agent talks up, and they're trying to talk to see if they can get you in there. For guys like me, the combine is huge because it can give you. a, you know, a bump, right? You know, you know, especially what's this guy play, what's his speed? And so if you don't go to the combine, you have your pro day. Right.

And at the pro day, the scouts come, and they watch you there at your pro day. And, you know, at our pro day, we had like 10, 15 scouts. And, you know, at that time, they were, you know, the Steelers worked me out as a corner. You know, the Packers worked me out as a running back. Patriots were there. Miami was there. They all wanted to see what I could do because at the time in 2009, the Wildcat just had that big bump in 2008 with Ronnie Brown and Ricky Williams. Remember that? Yeah. In Miami. Yeah. There's one of those blips and those phases of the NFL where a lot of teams are like, well, this guy can run. Right. But he also could throw so we could have a couple packages in for him. Maybe he could be a special teamer. Yeah.

You know, and so the Patriots came out, and they first sent out after the pro day, you get workouts individually by teams. So they first sent out Ivan Fears, their running backs coach, just to see, you know, they thought I could be a third down running back. Right. And I don't know what he said, but he made me do some running back drills, and he saw I could catch the ball or something. Put me up on the chalkboard, I thought I ruined it, you know, because they make you break down protections. and schemes and everything. They put a play on there and then they'll talk to you and then they say draw the play up, you're this,

what do you got to do? They're trying to see how you can compute and can you take in an NFL day where you take scheme to drill to clot, you know what I mean? So they try to test you and I thought I bombed that, but a week later they sent out their special teams coach, Scotty O'Brien, to see if I could catch punts.

And they, you know, sent out another coach to see if I could, to catch routes. And then after that process, you know, I got worked out by a few other teams. You know, you usually go on visits so then they fly you out to the organization so their doctors can take a look at you. So you could take a look at the interview. It's like the interview process. And I got flown out by three or four teams and Patriots didn't fly me out. I'm like, oh, I guess they don't like me. You know what I mean?

And then, you know, on the draft day, they drafted me. Wow, without going. Without going. Interesting. Well, it could be one of those things where they didn't want to show people. There's so many. Yeah. Freaking, right, right.

Yeah, they're up to something. They're interested, you know, maybe sneak this guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, so who knows. Wow. Because your numbers, if you had gone to the combine. My three cone or my 510, my 510, my 5, 5, 10, would have been the best that year.

Really? My three cone would have been the best that year. A long shuttle was probably up there. Amazing. My 40 was not like lightning. Is that wild? It's always weird how things just kind of happen for a reason. Like you kind of come under the radar.

Yeah. And you end up with them. Like if you had gone and people saw those numbers, who knows where you would have gone and what kind of program you would have been? Like it could have changed everything. Well, they all saw them, you know, they all, They all get the printout. So once one scout goes out to your pro day, then, you know, they flab-

Everybody starts to see it. They start to see. Yeah. Everything happens for reasons. You knew you could catch? You could always have good hands? Quarterbacks always say they have the best hands on the team. Oh, really?

Yeah. Because you catch the ball every play. Right. You can go on your hands at all times. Right. Which, you know, I learned is different when you're running full speed. You have a linebacker in front of you and a guy chasing you. Right.

You know, so it takes some time to learn. Yeah. You know, and you didn't realize when you run full speed, your eyes bounce. So the ball, you know, you got to learn how to track balls. That's crazy. So. Yeah, I had horrible hands. My father would take me out and throw passes and he would just laugh. Every time I tried to catch it or if it went off my head, he was like stone hands.

two left feet for hands so brutal that's why you were playing tackle yeah or at dn you said defensive end yeah fullback for a while in my badass school fullback

yeah dying breed yeah I know yeah will that come back is it possible could there be some fullback who's so good that it starts to change the direction of a team? I don't think that is the case, but I think that when people are zinging, there's going to be other teams that are trying to zag, for example.

Linebackers, when I first got in the NFL, were 255, 260, 245, big guys to plug up the run game. Now linebackers, 225, 230 pounds, where you could have a guy who's 200 pounds going and just occupy him. he's not going to block him great, which that's a receiver sometimes. So, you know, a fullback, and if you start seeing teams, I mean, you look at the 49ers, they have a very utilized fullback with Ooschek, a guy that could play a lot of spots, but also when you need to get that yard against a small box, meaning the front seven,

you know, there could be a team that does that. You know, there's always a team or two. There's probably four or five teams that still use. use fullbacks. But, right. Because the game has become such a space game, spread them and shred them. Yeah. You know, it's kind of been a dying breed.

So it's kind of a blessing I didn't go all the way because I'd be just riding the bench. No, you'd be on special teams. A lot of fullbacks. If you're a fullback, you've got to be playing special teams. Right. Core teamer. Did you like special teams?

Love special teams. Yeah. Love special teams. I mean, that speed is just so reckless. Yeah. And just, it's. If you have the ability, it's got to be fun. It is, but it's a grind.

Yeah. I used to love covering kicks on kickoff and returning punts and played PP for, you know, a little while. And I always backed up that. Did some kickoff returns. You know, it's a live, live play. Yeah. You know, guys are, those are the guys that, teamers are guys that have to grow. for a spot on that roster.

Right. So every time they, they are only on the field, maybe six to 12 times a game. Yeah. So every time they're on that field, those are war datties. Right. Those guys button their helmet up. And they, you know, when I first got a league,

you got guys that used to go up and they, there would be three guys as a wedge, the big linemen, three in your backup guards and stuff. They'd be the wedge guy for the kickoff. And you'd have guys that were, the fastest guys on the team and your job was you go as fast as you can

and you hit that mother even right in his chin with a 60-yard sprint so you know teamers man you gotta tip your cap to him I was a teamer for a while

yeah and you know those are guys that you know help you win a lot of games yeah were you how much

how how how does it feel on Monday like how wrecked are you after like when you were being used all the time and you were really like you know an important part of the 20s to 26 not too bad yeah you know you start dipping into your late 20s and you started getting into 30 and and you had a big game yeah i mean i remember by the end of my career i mean i couldn't walk until thursday oof you know it's just you you're you get beat it. It's like getting in a car wreck just every week. So it hurts that much?

Yeah, I mean, you got to think about it. You're going, you're running full speed 16 miles an hour and you may not get hit hard, but you got hit. Yeah. And so you're going 16 to 19 miles an hour and you just fall on the ground. You just jump out of a car. Yeah. You know, and, geez.

So it's a brutal sport. but with way guys have information and technology on, on, you know, recovering yourself with, you know, back in the day, you know, these guys had other jobs in the 70s. Right. You know, I mean, you guys smoking cigarettes in the locker room now. You know, everyone, it's gotten a lot in a better place for everyone. Yeah.

It would be the guys like Jerry Rice that would take it serious. And, you know, you'd hear the folklore of how. he trained how he got better and how he recovered you never really knew now you you can you can look it up anywhere right you know so yeah a lot of guys are taking a lot of pride in that because and if they're not they're not in the league for very long right so you know it's definitely a brutal brutal game were ever scared of anyone was there any player like that tagged you or like you or had a reputation i was never scared of anyone but ray lewis used to hit me a bunch Oh, God.

Yeah, he knocked me out of a game a couple times. He hit me so hard in the playoffs, my rookie year on a touchdown. I scored a touchdown on like a scramble. He came in and tackled me, and he kneaded my butt so bad that I had a hematoma and they had to drain it after the game. And if we were to win that game, I probably wouldn't have been able to play because I literally had like one huge J-Lo booty cheek on my right. I couldn't sit down for three weeks.

I had to wait like three weeks. I had to wait like a week and a half to go back to the Bay Area because I couldn't get on a flight because the donut would lose bad. Oh my God. Then he knocked me out of a game once. What does he look like when he's coming at you? A monster. Just gigantic, like a building? Yeah.

Like a minivan? Like a person with two houses is calves running very fast. Oh, my God. No, and I've gotten to know Ray. We were teammates on Inside the NFL for two years. Yeah. And it's been so funny to get to bust his balls about that and, you know, and got on everyone but Ray because I knew exactly what he could do to me.

Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, because he did it. He did it. The second time he hit me when I was going across the middle, Brady probably shouldn't have thrown that one. But, uh, and I dropped it. but he hit me so hard.

I got up. I started walking to the Raven sideline, and Helodi Nada goes, hey, buddy, your sidelines that way. I was like, oh, shit. All right, thanks, dude. Jeez. It took my helmet away on that one.

So Matt Damon, that was a concussion. All right, dude. There you go, Matt. Yeah, that's got to be, it's got to be insane. I mean, you guys are all insane. There's just a different level of Fearlessness, but you also know what you're capable of doing.

Yeah, but that's kind of like me going and having to do this Tom Brady bros, a roast. Right. I think you guys are insane. I'm terrified of going and doing, I have to do five minutes. Yeah, but the only, if it goes wrong, the only thing gets hurt is your feelings. I'm not going to have a giant J-Lo booty butt. You know, it's terrifying in a different way. Sometimes your mental health is more than your physical health.

Yeah, that is true. No. I'd much rather have anxiety than have Ray Lewis on my back. Tusha. Oh, my God. Yeah. I mean, I remember just like, just like, I mean, it's so silly to talk about high school football with you. But, like, there was guys that were just so much bigger who, like, were going on to the,

do great things. And they just showed up among us. And it was like, how do you even approach trying to block that guy or tackle that guy? It just seemed like, and then you get up into the pros, it's nothing but those guys. Yeah. You know, but I think it goes back to like being the undersized guy, seeing that guy that, like, that you're talking about. Yeah. That thought he was cool because he was the biggest guy in high school.

Right. And when he gets to people the same size as him, he doesn't know what to do. Right, right. You know, so. Yeah, levels it all out. Levels it all out. Yeah. How is your head?

Like, you're such, so driven and so, you know, for your whole life to do this thing. And then you do it. When you get spit out the other end. Yeah. And you've got Super Bowls and you've got MVP's and you, I mean, you did it. You did all of it. Yeah. Was that a shift?

Like, what, like, was it? satisfying? I was, I was satisfied. Yeah. That's good to hear. You know, if you ask me my rookie year, um, I'd have the career that I've had. I probably wouldn't be able to think that. Yeah. You know, with, with what everything I had to do to get to where I got. So I was definitely satisfied. I was, but, you know, when you're an athlete, you're a creature of habit. Yeah. I had the same routine, essentially since I was eight years old. Yeah. You know, you get up, you go to school, you come home, you go to practice, you do it again.

Right. You know, now school was just, you know, replaced with football school when you go into the NFL or college, you know. So, yeah. I had that same routine. So, you know, when you, when you're out, you learn that you have to create your own routine. Yeah. You know, and so, and to be productive. And I also, you know, I put myself in the situation, you know, with all the little things we used to do off the field that I had, you know, doors open to go do other things that I was interested in.

So, you know, instead of feeling that emptiness, I got that anxiety because I was about to do something new. Right. TV podcast. Yeah. You know, so it came, you know, I got those same feelings as when I showed up to New England. And like, uh-oh, what I do know. You know, that sense of uncomfortable. Yeah.

That it sucks, but usually you have to make yourself uncomfortable to have the best results or things happen in life. Yeah. It's crazy. Yeah. I know. Yeah, there has to be some suffering. Happily miserable. Yeah.

Yeah. It's a weird life. I know. Once you're comfortable, it's like something's not right. No. Something happens. Yeah. Amazing.

You working out all the time? I work out probably like four, four days a week. Nice. A box and I lift twice a week. How much harder is your workout, you think, than Joey's? I mean, Joey's pretty spelt. You know, he could be one of those leverage strength guys. You never know.

You never know. You could be in like an MMA boxing, jujitsu class where this guy gets you on. arm bar so I mess with nobody that I don't know nowadays you go to the little guy put you in arm bar get you like a pretzel yeah no it's not happening will you eat this bread do you think oh I'll eat it yeah yeah I live now you do live yeah you're allowed to eat things and yeah how how how regimented were you nutritionally like when I was playing yeah uh very yeah I mean I had a So I had a dietitian that would speak with, you know, a chef that was in communication with, you know, someone at practice to allow them know how much I ran that day to see how much I needed to refuel myself for that night.

Oh, really? Yeah, everything was pretty dialed. I mean, you take all the tests to see what certain foods make your body have inflammation factors. Jeez. You need to stay away from, things you need, you know, that. your body adapts well and absorbs well. So, I mean, it's a full-time gig. Yeah.

You know, being around Tom Brady, I learned a lot of that, you know, just. Is it true that he knew, like, what he was going to eat, like, a year from now? Like, he was that planned out that he... I don't know if he just ate the same things, so maybe. Right. He ate, like, a bird. For real? Yeah, like, a lot of nuts, seeds.

Uh-huh. And he wouldn't use his hands? Now you'd pecking. Really? A lot of nuts, a lot of seeds. I mean, big smoothie guy. When you're an athlete, a lot of us, you know, you're in between a meeting, you need a calorie, you need something nutritious that your body will absorb. Right.

Something that's good. So a lot of guys, you know, slamming smoothies all day, protein smoothies with all the fruits and everything. Were you jealous of baseball players who just, like, would have their bellies hanging over their belt and still kicking ass? With guaranteed contracts. Yeah. Yeah, I was. You know, I, those guys have, they have a mental grind.

You know, I have a lot of respect for, you know, baseball guys because I played a lot of baseball growing up. Yeah. You know, I didn't have them. mental levelness to be able to be bored for four hours. You know, a ball doesn't come to you. You know, you see a pitcher. You get to hit once every three innings. Yeah.

I needed something to run. I had too much ADD. Right. So I tip my half to those sports that play a lot of games because you've got to have a competitive stamina, you know, to be able to go through those. seasons. Right, right. So it's all hard.

Anyone's getting paid a lot of money to do something. It's hard. What do you think of Caitlin Clark? I mean, she's, I have a daughter now, so I've been watching a lot more, you know, female sports. And it's cool with the girl like her because, you know, your little kid, your little daughter will be talking about her. Yeah.

And it gives you an excuse to be able to watch something with her that you love. Right. maybe to recruit her over. Yeah. To love it as well. So, you know, I think it's been great. I mean, I turned on the draft last night to watch her get drafted. Amazing.

I watched a lot of the games. And I think it's great. Yeah. She's changed it. She really punched through. She has. I mean, she's not the, you know, she's the most recent one, but she did it in a way that, I mean, that final out viewed more viewership than the men's. Yeah.

It's crazy. It is. And to see how she was able to perform while the whole world was watching her. That's what's even more impressive to see that she's an assassin. Yeah. You know, that's a lot, you know, there's one thing to do it when you're not expected to do it. Right. You know, when there's an expectation and you meet those expectations and even go higher than those expectations, that's when you tip your cap.

It doesn't matter what you are. Yeah. It's just a stud. how do you how could you do that like how is there like the night before when you have a big game and you know things are expected of you and you know there's going to be pressure and there's people writing articles about you and yapping about stuff on radio like how did you handle that mental part of it like is it is it instinctual that you just kind of like go about your work or like did you have like when you're brushing your teeth going I don't know if I can do it

No, it all depended on my week of preparation, the practice week. Right. I can guarantee Caitlin Clark probably practice her tail off. Right. And once you get to the game, for football at least, you know, you had a great week of practice. You have your confidence that you built through practice. Right. You have your confidence in your teammates because you saw them do it well in practice.

Once you get to the game, that's the easiest part. Right. You know what I mean? You got the answers to the test. We know what we have to do if we just executed a high level, which we've already done. Yeah. And you visualize. Like the night before the game, I go over every play, every package.

You got your first downplays, your second down plays, your third down plays, your red area plays, your backed up plays, your three-point plays, or your four-point plays. You have like a huge menu of like 93 plays. plays right you know you go through them and you and you've already reped them a lot yeah but to like the night before when you go over your play sheet and you visualize it when you do it in a game it's deja vu really yeah you know you already that effective you've already seen it you've already seen it wow and then you can instinctively play in your subconscious nose because you practice it hard you studied it yeah so then your athleticism could come out man naturally.

That is pretty trippy thing. I mean, it's, you know, it's pretty commonplace to hear people say, like, you know, but that is pretty profound. It is. People have broken through and, like, no, this is, our consciousness can go to work. Like, we can use this to achieve things. We always just say practice execution becomes game reality. Yeah.

You know, and we would do these walkthroughs and we'd all be fed up because we've, you know, we've done these plays a million times. Right. You know, but anytime it was a got to have it situation, a high pressure situation, the teams that I was on, we performed because of those walkthroughs, practices, and all that stuff. I mean, that's really the root of where success comes is through your preparation. Right.

What did you learn from Brady about preparation? I learned from Brady You know his ability to compartmentalize was Was insane to me You know because as a younger football player For me I thought I was going to get cut after a bad practice Right yeah I mean that's how the league is

Yeah You know and Then you have a life outside of football Yeah That you have to deal with Right You know and to see how he was such a professional in not just his professional life,

but, you know, with his family and how he handled his schedule and how everything was predicated towards family and football. I learned a lot from him just being a fly on the wall and watching him. Right. You know, and his preparation is second to, like, there's no one that prepares like him. You know, because, like, people always says, what is it like, you know, Tom, and I just say, man,

every time you would practice with him, it didn't matter what day it was in the year. We would meet up in February, late February, if we didn't make a Super Bowl or March. And, like, we're running a two-minute drill, and we're, like, not just getting the physical reps, but the mental reps of the things that we remembered from the year before that we messed up on something

on this drive here. You know, it's just that practicing with a purpose was something that, you know, I learned a lot from him. And also his steadiness. He was the same guy at work. Right. All the time. Right. You know what I mean?

Yeah. And that's tough for someone that, you know, everyone's looking at. Yeah. You know, for me, I was up and down, you know, fuck this. Right. Yeah. You know, you banged up, you're sore. You get cranky.

Yeah, of course. You know, he was the same guy. Wow. That's weird. time. Yeah, like a robot. Yeah, he's probably a serial killer. Yeah, probably.

We're going to hear about something about him soon. Soon. Probably. Who was the funniest in the locker room during those years? Funniest? Yeah. Were you allowed, were people allowed to be funny? We had a lot of fun, okay? Yeah.

I know everyone has this narrative, the Patriots. Ah, that, okay, we had a lot of fun. Yeah. Okay, we just got bitched at, okay? We just had a mean dad. Yeah, mean dad. But he's a good dad He's a great dad

We won a lot of games You know You know But um We had We had a lineman And he does radio out in San Diego Rich Ormberger

Uh huh Went to Penn State And You know he would get up like I think he I think Coach Belich Had kept him around For the team morale

For like two extra years Because he was so funny Oh really Like we would literally Have him go up And he would tell us These stories about Penn State

When he would be sneaking into the locker room. You draw a diagram up there, give us a Joe paw impersonation. I mean, it was some funny stuff. Yeah. And the funny thing about him is we were drafted together. Oh, yeah. We're 22 years old, and he had a full head, he had full gray hair already.

Oh, really? So I remember the first day when all the veterans came into the locker room or into the team room, you know, you're there as a rookie for a little while by yourselves. You have an O-T-era camp, mini-camp, and then you work out. And first day, Rainy Moss looks at them. And while we're all, you have to introduce yourself in front of the captains. It's kind of nerve-wracking. You sit there.

You see Randy Moss, see West Welker. You see Tom Brady, Kevin Fall, Teddy Brewski, and all these guys. Yeah. So it's embarrassing. Of course. And Ormberger gets up there, and he says, Rich Ornberger, Penn State, Lyman. Rainy Moss goes, that's a player? I thought that was a motherfucking coach out there.

He was there for like three days with him. He thought he was a coach. Oh, great hair. Granted, there was 92 guys on the team at the time because it's, you know, early in the season, there's 90 guys on the team. Yeah. But, you know, he was just a funny guy. Him and Rusty Benson, Ross Ventron, he was a funny kid.

We called him the suburban poet where he would write poems. And sometimes after, you know, a long day, Bill. he had a poem for us and rusty benson we called him he'd go up there and he'd have these funny ass poems that uh made us all laugh so that's awesome there's some funny guys yeah there is a cool thing like i remember reading when the uh when the Mets were rising like in 86 right and they just had this like pirate kind of attitude yeah like they're coming to your town and they're going to mess you up and they're going to drink in your bars, they're going to sleep with your women.

There was just kind of this... Sounds like the Raiders. Yeah, exactly. There was like that thing, though, there's like, did you... On the years that you weren't successful, like the, you know, Patriots not successful, you know, not winning all of it.

Could you see... Was it a chemistry thing? Like, did you... The years that you did it, was there a tighter family? Was there a tighter family? was there a tighter brotherhood? There was, but also some of the times,

like I think one of the best teams I played on was probably our 15 team after we won the Super Bowl and 14. And we caught the injury bug late. Right. You know, you lose Nate Soldier, and then you lose Dionne Lewis. I broke my foot.

And it's one of those things where we all hear the ball has to bounce your certain way for you to go win a Super Bowl. And a lot of times you have to be healthy. Yeah. You know, and it's such a brutal game that, you know, sometimes, I mean, look at this last year, how many backup quarterbacks played, you know, a significant amount of time. Yeah.

You know, so it's those teams that did win it, there was a confidence factor because you look around and we saw the guys that we needed there. Yeah, it's still there. The years that we didn't, little banged up. Right. You look around and, you know, people are probably second guessing or, you know, you never know. Yeah. I was on some really good, for the majority of my career, all of my career pretty much, we had a pretty good group of guys in a locker room.

They did a good job of keeping the assholes out. Right. And is that, is that, Belichick? Is that the... I mean, I think it's a collective unit of Belmont. Belichick and a lot of the guys that were helping them. Yeah. Definitely.

Did you ever relax and feel like I'm not going to get fired? Yeah, I think it was after like my second Super Bowl. Yeah. Yeah. And you're good. That's all it took. Three contracts and two Super Bowls. No, you know, the more plays you make, you get a little more comfortable.

But, you know, I think Coach Belichick, you know, when you, when you, When you walked in there and he walked in the room, your shoulders went back. Everyone, you know, was on high alert because he could test you at any moment. Right. You know, and you did feel uncomfortable. But a lot of those teams that we went out and won, we were comfortable when we were uncomfortable because of little shit like that. Right, yeah.

All the time. Yeah. You know, it may not been fun during the preparation, but I tell you know what's fun. Jumping down boils, boils in the street on a goddamn float, duck boat, and a parade with millions of people laughing. Oh, my God. That's fun. Yeah.

So. Yeah, worth it. Joey, do you want to ask something? I know, I don't want, I mean, I know this means a lot to you, and you've been trying not to cough over there. No, I'm sorry. I would, um, I would ask you something, if you don't mind. Um, this came up on, um, the, when Tom told me you were going on your podcast.

I told him that when I was in high school playing sports, or maybe a little younger than that, but you sort of think about the pro athletes that get you going, get you fired up. You know, like he's working. He got where he wants to go. I want to be there. Was that, would you feel that way about pro athletes when you were younger?

And then does that sort of transform maybe into my opponents or my team? Or it's all just me working at this point. I don't got to think about anybody else. Um Yeah That's a good question When I was a kid Good job Joey

You know I was around The 49ers And The work ethic of Jerry Rice Was legendary It was like the only one Right

Like he was ahead of it There was a lot Yeah There was a lot of guys That worked with him But he you know He made it He made it

You know Normal Right He normalized it Yeah And You know I can remember.

So you did have inspiration. I did have inspiration, you know, from guys that I looked up to. And I was always very competitive with myself. I was probably the hardest on myself than anyone. And so, you know, that came from probably my father where, I could remember going out and, you know, I got, drafted. I came home and I went to my high school and I was doing some workouts, you know, with a coach. And I came home from work or working out. My dad rolls up six o'clock from work

and he asked me, did you outwork them? I know, dad. I was working with my coach. I'm not talking about that. Or if anyone was there. I'm talking about the eight little kids that are in high school, eighth grade that are going to come try to take your job when they can. Did you outwork them? You know what I mean? So I was, yeah. I had this guy that, as in my dad, that would always just try to be up in my head. Right.

Swim in there. Was he an athlete? He was, but, you know, he had, you know, his father died when he was a very young, you know, when he was very young. And, you know, he didn't have someone to push him like that. Like he pushed me. Yeah. And he played freshman football. got burned in the first game, was playing corner, got his feelings hurt, and quit, and it became a mechanic.

Wow. You know, and my dad would always say, I was just as good as those other kids. I was always at the top, but it was the guys that had the dads that pushed them. Right. They were always just that much better than me. And I think he took that to heart, and he pushed me really hard. Interesting, interesting. You know, right?

They're like for him to quit, but that no way. what to do, how to push you. Yeah. You know, so, um, did you get, was it frustrating at times? Oh, yeah. I mean, I, I, uh, you were, we were doing batting practice and this story's out there, but my dad was throwing batting practice when I was like 14 before a game. He'd take me out early and just get some cuts in.

I was dipping my shoulder at Sequoia high school. And he, he, he brushed me off the mound or off the plate. And I, you know, I was like a, I'm, I was a, I was a, fucking little asshole, you know, like spit in at him. Bring it in here, dad. But like thinking that, he throws it again. I threw the bat. I charged my own.

My dad, one two'd be. Put me on the ground. I went to the game with the bloody nose. You know, and that's just how it was. People were walking by and they go, old man Edelman, and with his son again. You know, so. Yeah.

You know, I would say that to get back, to your question. I was definitely inspired by the pro athletes, you know, when I was a younger kid or when I was in high school, we used to always, you know, the cool thing is if you got recruited to Division I school. Yeah. You know, so like we had this saying around one of my baseball teams I played on where like if you were good, if something was cool, like that was a D1 play. Right. We would say that. Yeah. You're so D1, bro. You know, like, that's what you would say. Yeah.

You know, so, you know, you definitely have to pool from a lot of things, you know, from people that have been in situations that you've wanted to be in for inspiration. Yeah. And then also, you also have to be able to be self-motivated and be able to compete against yourself. You know, that's, sometimes when you're competing against someone, you know, you're, you know, sometimes. when you're competing against someone, it'll raise you a level, but I want to, you know, how do you compete when no one's watching?

You know what I mean? Yeah. You converted to Judaism? Didn't convert. Didn't grow up anything, but practice. Uh-huh. Now, my grandfather was Jewish,

my dad's Jewish. So, uh, you know, started to learn about it in high school, you know, started going, And like I said, my dad's dad died at a young age.

Right. So I started to learn up on it and, you know, start talking with rabbis. And now, you know, me and my father every Friday, speak with a rabbi just to study the Old Testament, study the Torah. Oh, nice. So, you know, I don't know what I am. Mm-hmm. I do. I feel like I'm Jewish.

Uh-huh. So I don't know if I would say that I converted. Yeah. Did you, you felt that way growing up? Just because not really? We didn't do anything. Our religion was sport. Uh-huh.

You know, so that's kind of where it was. So when you started kind of paying a little more attention to it, was your dad along for the ride? Or like you guys were doing, just communicating? Yeah, he was along for the ride. And then he became, you know, there's a lot of, there's a lot of family history. Mm-hmm.

You know, my grandfather had an affair with my grandma, left his family. So there's a lot of things that, you know, My grandma didn't tell my dad just because probably wasn't the best. Right. People didn't talk about stuff then. Yeah. And, you know, my dad respected that. Right.

From, you know, a single mom that raised him. You know, he didn't. Right. He never pried. Right. I was the kid that pride. Right. You know, so.

Yeah. And that's where it started. And does it feel like when you, does it feel familiar? Like. It does. Because a lot of the things. that we learn, my father, without really knowing, taught that way. Right.

Right. Yeah, yeah. So, like, I do feel like it's always been in me. Right. It's interesting. The more I learn about it. Yeah. And the more we study.

Has it, are you enjoying it? I do. Does it give you a good roadmap, a good guidance? Yeah. I mean, anytime you get to learn and study, you know, I study with Rabbi Hamilton out and he's from Boston. And we hop on these calls and to hear his perspective and how he breaks down the Torah and how he teaches us. I mean, it's a very, it's a very great thing for me and my dad. It's something that we do together.

and it just feels comfortable and it feels normal. Yeah. It's amazing. There's a wisdom to all of it. There is. Everything's so, life is confusing. Life is very confusing. And to have teachers and pull from the Bible like that, these lessons.

Yeah. And you just, you almost, like your shoulders just relax. You're like, oh, this is written for so long ago. Yeah. You think from the outside, from very different people. It's like, no, they're going through the same stuff you were, same anxieties, same pride. It's all the same. And it's like, oh, there's actually a little bit of a pathway.

Like, there's guidance of how to live this life. There is. I mean, if you're willing to listen. Yeah. And you're willing to be able to learn. If you're willing to take the time. Yeah. You know, so, you know, it's been, it's been an awesome journey.

Yeah. To go and get involved in. How many years now? About? Probably 15. Oh, wow. 15 years. Yeah.

Yeah, that's not a fad. Yeah. So are you enjoying this stage of your life? I mean, it seems like you've got, like, it's very cool, you know, it's been great getting to know you. Yeah. And I think we should hang more. definitely uh with or without matt and uh i think that uh it's like it seems like it seems like

you're enjoying yourself it seems like i you know from the outside old football players the careers were shorter and then you know had a lot of life and not a lot of opportunities to kind of do stuff it seems like you found a lot of cool stuff to do and you got out of this crazy career healthy yeah that's a blessing it is yeah i i do i am enjoying and but it's it's like anything else you transition and who you are who i was during football you know happily miserable always you know you know thinking about everything even though you know you say you're not supposed to but you really do you know yeah you do that in your new life and with your new jobs and your new your new aspirations um the one thing i i do get to enjoy a lot more

that I've got to that I than ever more than ever is is being able to you know say yes to your family a lot more and and be around my daughter a lot more yeah you know you know you when you're a football player or someone probably in any field at the highest level yeah you know you're almost like a mercenary where everyone in my family understood that that I had a job to do. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, weddings and birthdays and graduations.

Yep. And graduations. I can never say yes to because, you know, I was in a mini camp or an organized team activity or, you know, it was in the playoffs. Yeah. You know, so that part has been awesome. Yeah. Um, do you ever say yes to like a family birthday party that's not like the real inner circle? and then you're like, oh, I can say yes to this.

And then you get there and you're like, this really blows. I've said, yeah. But I still have the, I still have a card. I got to go. I got something. I got. No. But, you know, it's been fun.

Yeah. And, uh, but it's still, you know, you do miss, you know, that, that team. environment, that, that camaraderie. Yeah. You know, now I used to know for at least four years where I was going to be. Right. With the contract. Yeah.

Yeah. You can get traded, whatever, but you had some. Now you've got to go out and hustle and bustle. Yeah. You know, you have to go out and do things. Yeah. So it's, it's almost like talking about like a veteran. It's like you've actually been through wars with these guys.

ways, you know, and it's like that brotherhood, that thing just only exists in the military or that thing only exists in the NFL. Like, it's, yeah, there's got to be, and now you're spit out and you're kind of on your own. Yeah, I mean, very different than the military were compensated very well. Yeah, yeah. But I mean, that thing of relying on other men and like, there's a, that brotherhood. There is. You know, and that's what you, you try to create.

in your life with what you have going. Like that's what we're accustomed to. Right. So that's what, you know, I try to have in my life with, you know, my production company guys. Yeah. You know, the team that works around me, you know. Right. And, you know, you try to bring the things that you learn from that.

Yeah. And the relationships that you had in that. And you try to transfer it over and do it. Yeah. And, you know, you have a lot of, because of my career and friends. football, there's a lot of leeway of where I get to choose what I want to do. Yeah. I get to choose the people you get to work around.

Not always, but, you know, that, that's a pretty cool thing, too. What are the, what are the charitable things that you are closest to your heart? Well, I used to, right now I work with Put Me in. It's based out of Boston and the Bay Area, and it helps kids with incarcerated parents be able to have, you know, after sport programs, you know, for a kid, a lot of these kids, there's a terrible stat, you know, if your parents incarcerated, you know, there's, I don't know, I'm off the top of my head. Yeah. But, you know, kids can go down the wrong road.

And for the kids that want to join in this program, put me in that have an incarcerated parent, we help kids, you know, buy their equipment with mentorship programs. And, you know, it's something cool. Yeah, that's great. I like, I worked a lot with the best buddies for like a decade plus over in Massachusetts. Just did something with Dana Farver helps kids cancer treatments and the Jimmy Fun. So, I mean, there's a lot of, you know, charities that I've worked with in the past. Yeah.

Boston Food Bank. You know, and it's, it's pretty cool to, to, it's really cool, honestly, to be able to, or help put a smile on a kid's face that's not having, you know, the best day. Yeah, that's great. It sounds like a lot of them are kid based. A lot of kid based. Yeah. We do it for the kids. Yeah, it's great.

We do it for the kids. Yeah. You know, that's really great. Well, I know you got to pick up your kid. I do. Yeah. We're pretty good, though. Are we good?

10 minutes? 10. 10? All right, good. Yeah. You feel all right? I'm good. All right, good.

Got one more? Mm-hmm. A couple more. Mm-hmm. We can keep going. You gave me a lot of time in line. Who, uh, who cooked for you when you were a kid? My mom.

Yeah. Was she good? She was she good. She was pretty good. Yeah. I mean, we, we ate at home every, a lot. You know, like you were paycheck to paycheck people. Yeah.

And she, you know, she was German. So she would, every once in a while, like once a month, we'd get like a good German dish. Oh, nice. You know, schetzel or some kind of Rolidin or roll coal, red cabbage. Oh, nice. But then she also cooked like a 1950s American mom. Right. A lot of stuff.

You know, I'm talking hamburger helper. Stuff from boxes and cans. Yeah. Boxes and cans. maybe, spaghetti every Wednesday, tacos every Tuesday. Nice. I incorporate a lot of the same things with my kid. Yeah.

I cook, I try to cook for her. Barbecues on the weekends. Nice. So my mom cooked for me a lot. What was your favorite? Like, if you, did you have a... I like this, I like, she used to make, um, she used to make this goulash.

Hungarian goulash with like this Swiss beef. It's like a stew. Oh, man. And then she'd make these dumplings. It's very hearty. She's. Like these dumplings. And I love that.

Oh, man. That's a smell that fills up the house. Oh, it does. Yeah. It does. I also love, I like their German food. Like, Schenzel. It's like the little dumplings that she would, she would saute some chopped onions, bleed them down.

and you put a little Parmesan in there, and she'd always do things a little different than what her mom used to do. But those are the two that stick out. Yeah. Yeah, those are the two. I had a, my one grandfather was German, and, but there was very little German food around.

Yeah. But, yeah, I don't even know where it, I guess my grandmother, that one grandmother wasn't the greatest cook. And, but, yeah, any, like any of that schnitzel kind of uh a cucumber salad yeah yeah like all of this is grapple and sausages and all that kind of stuff i i still have like a it's funny how it's like kind of in your DNA like anytime i'm on the road and there's like a german restaurant yeah that stuff is just great do you

do you ever have fun of kukin no it's a german pancake it's like a crepe oh yeah my my own one to make those for me. It's just, I mean, it's not super, I make it my daughter. You just throw some jam in there, you roll it up and cut it. Like a, yeah, I get crepe. What's it call again? Funakukin. Funakukin.

Funakukin. With the P. P. Yeah. Oma. Oma. Oma. I had an Oma.

Ohma. Yeah. Ohma was my great grandmother. Yeah. It's so great. And what are you good at cooking? I could cook. I do the fun of hooking pretty well.

Nice. I'll do like a stuffed bell pepper here and there. Some rice and get a little Italian sausage. Mix it with some ground beef or something like that. Make a red sauce. Nice. You know, I'm pretty, I don't know how to, I'm pretty good around the kitchen. If I have a recipe, I can go whip something out.

Yeah. You can go at it. I can do it. Yeah. But I wouldn't say, like, I'm, I'm, Great on the barbecue. Yeah. I can do the barbecue pretty good.

That's good. But if I have, like, a refrigerator full of something, or if I'm on, like, the last of my refrigerator, I can whip something up regardless. Right. That's good? Make it taste good. Nice.

Would your daughter say you're a good cook? I think she would. Yeah. I think she would. I think she would. Yeah. Yeah. Fun of cooking.

Fun of cooking. I want to look that one up. It's a crazy. Do you smoke weed or eat weed? I smoke. Yeah. Yeah, smoke here and there. Yeah.

Trying to get back into weed. Yeah. You know, it's pretty, you know, at the end of a day, let you unwind. Yeah. You don't really, drink glass of wine. I start feeling it still. I know.

You feel it the next day. The next morning. Yeah, even one glass. Yeah. I know. You know, especially, you know, when you're, an athlete, you couldn't drink because you leave yourself vulnerable of like pulling something because it dehydrates you. It's terrible for your recovery. Right. So, you know, I started smoking

when I got the NFL. Really? Yeah. Did they test for it? They did once a year. Once a year. And once you were done? Yeah. You were done. So was it kind of common for people to get that test out of the way? Well, there was, so it's changed now where they know where the test, is. When I was playing, you could be tested like four times a year. So you'd have to stop for like a month before. I'm giving the plot. You stopped like a month before the first date that you could get tested.

You know, you potentially had to stop for three months. Right. You know, and then if you didn't get tested before, before training camp, everyone's tested. Right. So. It had to be great for recovery just to like. I think it was great for my mind more to slow things down. and you're always thinking.

Right, right. This, that, oh, you know. Yeah. So that was something that I liked, you know, and made you kind of just want to, you can't, when you're playing, you don't want to go out and do anything. You'd rather just smoke a doobie and lay, lay at home or watch, put the game ready's on. Yeah.

Go through your nightly recovery routine. Yeah, that's what I want to do. But I, you know, I smoked when I was younger, but now it's, I got to find the right one. You do. Because I'm not like some just, you know, you shouldn't get high and then think immediately, when is this going to be over? You know what I mean? Yeah. No, it's funny when you, when someone that hasn't smoked in a very long time or they used to back in your kid.

Marijuana has changed these days. Yeah, big time. The stuff you guys used to smoke was like 3% THC. This stuff now is crazy. I know. So you have to. Yeah. temper it down and just take one and go.

Oh, man. Someone gave me an edible rice crispy thing. And I was just like, and I tried to sit down and write, and I couldn't even get my fingers to work. I don't like the edibles. Me neither. Because those last forever.

Yeah, I don't. For like three hours. Yeah. And you don't know when it's going to kick in. You're just walking around like, am I? 45 minutes. Just put a timer next time, bubs. Oh, really?

And then you're out of your mind. We've all done it where you eat it, you don't feel it, you eat more, and then you're like, I did too much. Joey's an edible machine. He does nothing but eat edibles. You know, he's got low body fat. He came on tour with me, and my opening act game came like two, three edibles. He's like, that's all? I thought we were all going to do it.

I thought that was the, that was like the only reason. I was like, give him over. I'll start. And then nobody else doesn't. You have high stamina. Yes, yeah. Got it. Yeah.

But it is a good thing. It is a good thing. You ain't never heard anyone doing something crazy on wheat. No, they're kind. I know. You're exactly right. Yeah. You've heard some crazy things on alcohol, other things.

Yeah. You know, you never heard of a guy going in and murdering someone after smoking a dooby. No, exactly. So. Yeah. Could you like wine now? I do like wine. Yeah, me too.

A very guy, man. Yeah. Love the wine. Did you really go out with Jerry Rice's daughter? I did. I did. How did that happen? We went to school in the same area.

Okay. We grew up in the same, like, same city-ish. You know, so she went to, like, a rival school of mine. Right. You know, we became really close, friends, and just dated off and on for a while. Did you meet him at that time? I did. Was he intimidating?

Very. Yeah. Very. I mean, the first time I met him, I think I rode my bike up to her house. And Mr. Rice came out with, uh, a really cool chain, no shirt, and a 12-pack. You know, when you're 13 years old, you see Jerry Rice, who's a living God at that time.

Good Lord. Come out. I think he had cornrows at that time, too. Really? Pretty terrifying. Jeez. Yeah, he doesn't even have to say anything. Didn't, I, he opened the door, said,

Jaquit. I was like, oh. Are you with someone now? I'm talking with someone, ish, mm-hmm, ish. Right. It's tough. Yeah. Dating when you have a daughter.

Yeah. I'm trying to establish myself and something else. Right. You know, you figure out that life's really about time management. It's like a pie chart of time. Yep. Like, where do you want to put your time? Yeah.

You know, majority of your time goes to your family, your daughter, your schedule goes. predicated toward that and then work you got to make money yeah and then after that you know do you have that time to put into someone with the variables that you have going on in your life and and their own and their own pie chart their own pie chart and you know i don't you don't always people's time yeah yeah right well it's got to be uh your options have to be a lot greater than Joey's. I think. Yeah.

Joe, he's struggling. Never know, dude. He's struggling. Never know. Yeah. Like I said, UFC combat. You know, he could have a tripod down there. This guy could be the guy.

Yeah. We know. We know. So funny. Well, when, uh, you got to come out to a show some time. Definitely. Yeah. Definitely. Where are you? Are you out here? A bunch? You go to the store? Yeah, I go the store a lot.

I'm not, yeah, I do shows out here. I'm on the road a lot right now. Yeah. Up to this next Netflix special, but. Let me know. I love going to the store. Yeah. Like I used to go to see, I met through, I think Sam, right? Yeah, yeah. I used to go

watch Sam at the cellar. Oh, yeah, yeah. I just live in New York. Oh, that's cool. That's the font. That's, yeah, it's the And then you get to hang around the other comics. Yeah, yeah. It's a good scene. How long did you live in New York? I lived there for one year. Oh, yeah.

That was enough? No, I just, Lily started in the starting kindergarten. She couldn't come out as much. Right, right. Then I started commuting in New York from L.A. Yeah, yeah. You know. Yeah.

You like it out here? I do. I mean, it's, you find a good group of people. Mm-hmm. You know, the weather you can't beat. Yeah. There's good food. Yeah.

There's activities. Yeah. I mean, it's a beautiful place. Yeah. Close enough to home. You know, it's, it's pretty remarkable when you can come from the beach and see, you know, snow on the mountain. Yeah. It is pretty great.

It's pretty beautiful. I know. Or you can go to, you know, so many outdoor activities here. Yeah. Do you miss, like we said earlier, the, the cold weather people? I do. Yeah. That's the biggest thing.

You know, that's the people, like people always say, you know, people from the East Coast are out. Yeah, they are, but you know what they're, you know where you're getting. Right, exactly. You know what you're getting. I know, 100%. Out here, you know, it's, you don't always know what you're getting. No, you don't. You don't know what you're getting.

Yeah, it's like, yeah, just because there's palm trees and sunshine doesn't mean it's all paradise. Yeah. Those taxes are high, too. Yeah. All right. Let me know how you, how you do the bread. Tomorrow morning with popping in a toaster with a little butter. That's the way I start my day.

Got it. Yeah. I'm a big sourdough guy. All right. Good. I appreciate you remembering that. Yep. I will be a tough critic.

All right. I can take it. Judging by the humidity outside. And I was just impescadero. You've been out there? No. Artichoke Capital World, about 35 minutes from Haffoon Bay up the one in the Bay area. The humidity levels there.

Make the sourdough. So, yeah. So delicious. But it, I mean, the crust, the crunch, and I did smell it, smells great. Right. You got to have that. Yeah. It's more country loaf than like a tangy sourdough.

Yeah. But I'll just let the bread do the talking. Yeah. I mean, it looks, I like a good crunch, and I did feel the softness inside. That's the best part of the sourdough or like a French loaf. Oh, the best. I like that crunch soft. Uh-huh.

technique, you know what I mean? How did you get in real quick, nutshell, like baking? Yeah, I was in a writer's room with a friend of mine. I always liked to cook. Yeah. And I was in a writer's room with a friend of mine who had just discovered what sourdough bread was that it had this starter, like this weird scientific science fiction yeast. Yeah, like the living organism that you feed flour and water.

And he told me this whole story. and I told my kids at dinner one night, like my buddy with Max was telling me. And for Christmas, my daughter got a sourdose starter started. Yeah. Just put flour and some water and got the whole thing bubbly and gave it to me as a Christmas present. And I don't know. I just did it.

I made my first couple loaves. And I got hooked. I got really hooked on it. And it's meditative. It just is, I mean, it's been years now. It just has folded into my life. I can't quit it. I get that with my outside plants.

Uh-huh. You know what I mean? It's something like with seeing the progression, putting the time in. Yeah. And it's natural. Natural. There's something about it that's kind of grounding. Baking's like a science.

Well, bread is kind of in between. Is it? Real baking and, I mean, it is a science. There's huge books on it. But cooking is like an art. You know, feel it. You're like, you said, the end of the refrigerator.

You're like, yeah, I'll make something happen. Cakes and pastries, science. You mess up a measurement, which I'm sloppy. I got it. Or how you put the ingredients in. Right. Yeah, right, exactly. Yeah.

Putting the eggs one at a time rather than just, this is somewhere in between. Wet to dry, right? Wet to dry. Isn't that what you're supposed to do? You put the dry in first and you put the wet on top? I don't know. Yeah. You know more than I do.

don't. But this is somewhere in between where you can mess it up and kind of get it back. Yeah. And yeah, I just love it. And once I realized that we weren't eating real bread our whole lives. And that... What do you mean? Wonderbread's not real?

Yeah. Turns out bread shouldn't have 50 ingredients. It should be four. Those 50 ingredients taste delicious with some peanut butter and jelly on it bones. Oh, so good. We had a toaster. The Wonderbread. We got close to the toaster and it melted and the Wonderbread dots were on the toast at my whole childhood.

I still think about it like like an old friend. That's America right there, baby. It sure is. Thanks for spending the time. This was great. I appreciate it. We're going to do more together for sure unless this is shitty and then I will never hear from you again. No, this is going to be delicious.

And then the next time I come back, you've got to do a Dutch crunch for me. A Dutch crunch? Yeah. What's that? All right. look it take a little gander all right tiger bread dutch crunch it's big in the bay area as well all right um put a layer of it's like a bread and then they put a layer of like a sweet layer on top like with sugar bread on top and then it crackles yeah top and it's chewy you saw it's another

bay area delicacy it's the least i could do thank you i look forward to it all right i have a bag for you awesome thanks joey