Breaking Bread with Tom Papa - Episode 278 - Dusty Slay

Episode Date: August 19, 2025

Today Dusty Slay joins us at the table! From living in a trailer park to having his own Netflix special, Dusty has lived a varied life. He talks driving drunk, comedy influences, and braiding his hair. Enjoy! Check out Dusty's Netflix special "Wet Heat" out now. ---------- 0:00:00 Intro 0:00:30 TomPapa.com 0:01:25 Patreon Shoutout 0:01:56 Dusty is tired, not a 10pm crowd 0:04:00 Special congrats 0:05:30 Hiring local openers 0:07:13 Best and worst markets 0:09:16 Prom shows and high school shows 0:12:58 Living in Charleston, drinking and driving, and car accident 0:22:25 Fist fights and getting beat up 0:24:11 Getting into comedy, performing drunk 0:26:27 Dead pan comedy, Mitch Hedberg and Steve Martin influence 0:30:00 Comedy callbacks, improv, trucker hats 0:32:28 Trailer park jokes 0:35:25 Pop artists getting into country music 0:41:07 Still vs sparkling water; scars 0:43:52 Living in a trailer park, getting shot with a bb gun 0:45:34 Uncomfortable moment 0:46:49 Kids growing up soft, getting stabbed with a pencil 0:50:58 Being embarrassed to live in a trailer park and being the poor kid 0:54:11 Parenthood 0:56:10 Life after parents divorce 0:57:17 Brushing hair, pigtails 0:59:19 Breadwinner, Nate Bargatze movie 1:00:09 Cracker Barrel commercial 1:02:05 Tractor work and farming 1:05:00 Phone calls 1:05:30 Touring 1:06:56 Provolone and eating food from fans 1:08:00 Bread! ---------- Tom Papa is a celebrated stand-up comedian with over 20 years in the industry. Watch Tom's new special "Home Free" out NOW on Netflix! Patreon - Patreon.com/BreakingBreadWithTomPapa Radio, Podcasts and more - https://linktr.ee/tompapa/ Website - http://tompapa.com/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/tompapa Tiktok - https://www.tiktok.com/@tompapa Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/comediantompapa Twitter - https://www.twitter.com/tompapa #tompapa #breakingbread #comedy #standup #standupcomedy #bread #dustyslay Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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face. So we had that going on. I got stabbed by a girl with a pencil in the eighth grade. She stabbed me a few times. Why? Because I, she stole something for me and I pushed her head. And then she stabbed me a bunch of times. And no teachers intervened. No, there was no teacher in the room, but I did snitch. The moment the teacher came back, I said, she just stabbed me. It's breaking bread. Hey, everybody. Today's episode is brought to you by. the good people at tompapa.com. Wow! It's really hard to get these guys. We feel pretty lucky. My tour dates, I'm going heavy starting in September. We're doing a whole bunch of dates. We're going to Erie, Pennsylvania. We're going to Pittsburgh, Borgantown, West Virginia.

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and have some fun. And that's it. Yeah, I'm just going to do the podcast now. I'm tired. I want to do it, and I'm like, this is great, but I'm tired. I know. That happens to me every time I go to New York. I'm like, I just pack it, try and get everything in.

And then I'm like on my way scurrying to go do another spot or whatever. And I just see people at cafes just like outside with wine and food. I'm like, those people are living. Yeah, I wish I had not said yes to the comedy store show tonight. I have my own show, so it's nice. But I wish that I was not doing that. It's your own show? It's at 10.30.

I want to be asleep. Yeah, exactly. I think someone asked me to do a 10. 30 like a game show there. Yeah. Is that the way you doing? Story Wars? Yeah, maybe.

I know that's what they're doing that also there. No, it's my show where I'm doing stand-up. Oh, cool. So it's, you know, it's fun. That's what I like to do, but not at 10.30. I know. A sweet 8 o'clock. They keep putting me.

I did 10 o'clock in Vegas recently and I was like, this is not selling well because I'm not a... Oh, at the, at the Venetian? Yeah. Yeah. I was there the last weekend that they did the early one at 8. And the guy's like, yeah, so we're moved. This is the last weekend in the showroom. We're going to move it and go to this bigger space.

And the show's going to be at 10. And I was like, well, it was nice working with you. Yeah. My people are in bed by 10. I'm not a 10 p.m. crowd either. The show was pretty good. It ended up being good in the end. But yeah, I'm not a 10 p.m. crowd.

It's not. I don't think, I mean, you talk to Kathleen Madigan, a whole bunch of great comics. When they're adding a second show, they're going four. Oh, yeah. Rather than later. Yeah. And I haven't done that yet, but it's... I want to just do the 4 p.m. show. Just do 4 and then go to dinner.

Yeah, be done. Be done. That's what that's... That's where it's at for me. Yeah, that would be perfect. Yeah. Congratulations on the special. Thank you. It's really great. It's really funny. And we just hung out a little bit earlier. You really, really just make me laugh. It's just, you're just, you just, I don't, I just, I just, I just, I just,

you get me. Like there's certain comics, as you know, in life, there's certain comics that just get you and make you laugh uncontrollably. And I find myself giggling like a little kid. Well, I appreciate that. I feel like we probably have a similar sense of humor, a more dry comedy. And I like dry comedy. Yeah. That's my favorite stuff. Right. You know, just really like not punching you in the face with it, but it's bringing you in. Yeah, exactly. It's just going to come on in, but it's so well-crafted, too.

Yeah, thank you. It's really, really good work on it. A lot of nice callbacks. The jokes just build. You have a good through line. It's like, it's interesting. I don't know if you get this, but every time I leave stage,

I'm always thinking, was that enough? Oh, yeah. Was that good enough? Was it big enough? Was it long enough? My live shows, I do an hour 20 sometimes, because, yeah, I'm like, especially when it's newer stuff, I go, well, I want to, if it's not as funny as I want it to be, at least want to be out there a long time. Right. And then watching you from the outside, watching you, I'm like, yeah, that is, an hour is enough.

Like, that's a great show. An hour of, like, we went on a journey. It was a lot of stuff. I didn't get bored. And it was perfect. Yeah, I mean, I wrestle with the idea of having just with openers, just fine. someone in the city I'm in, having them do 10 minutes, and then I just do the rest of the show. Is that how you do it? That's not how I do it now, but it is an idea I mess around with because I'm like, you know, they are just coming to see me. Yeah. And then I'm, you know, I'm bringing someone.

I'm helping pay for flights. I'm paying for hotels. And I'm like, I could find, because I found a local guy in Idaho when I was there, because I didn't know anybody around. And I thought, well, that'll be an expensive flight. Yeah. And he was so happy to do the show that I'm like, he was much happier than my friends that I bring. Right.

You know. He thinks this is great. Yeah. He posted about it for weeks after. Really? I was like, that's what I'm talking about. Was he funny? Did you vet him before you asked him?

I watched a video and I was like, okay, this is good enough. But he actually did a really great job. The video, I was like, I don't know how he'll do, but he did really great. And when you announce him to come out, do you say anything like this is right from right here in town? Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're very on. Right. Yeah, I don't even know how to say on, on, on.

Yeah, you're very own. Yeah, yeah. Very own. Own. Yeah. You did a good job saying oil in your special. Oh, yeah. Well, I struggle with it because, you know, you say oil and then, you know, but you're from the south and it's like, oh.

Yeah. So I'm like, well, I want to do both. You did. I want them to southern people to know, I know how to pronounce it their way. I'm not traded on you. I'm not enunciating all the way. But I'm going to say,

but I'm going to enunciate for the rest of the joke. Yeah, but I also want other people to know that I can't say the word. Do you have a bigger following in the South or as Netflix expanded it to everywhere? I think the South is still where I have the most. The Midwest, I do really well too. But that's where I've always gone when I was coming up as a feature. Right. Just drive around to the southeast and the Midwest.

Right, right. Phoenix, I have a pretty good following there because I just have been there a bunch. Yep. You know, and there's various places. Oddly enough, I'd sell really well in Seattle and Portland, Oregon. Sure, yeah, I could see that. Yeah. Yeah.

So that's pretty much everywhere. Yeah, yeah, I guess you're right. But there still are pockets. Like I did Bakersfield earlier this year and I sold practically no tickets. It was a hot show. The people who did come were there to see it. Yeah. And I was making fun of myself for not selling a lot of tickets.

And I said, you know, when you don't sell tickets, people give you all the excuses. They go, well, it's, you know, it's, you know, this, this going on in the South. They go, well, it's a football, it's football season. Right. And I'm like, well, it's Friday. And they go, yeah, high school football. Yeah. And then someone yelled out, they go, graduation.

And I go, yeah, it could be anything. And then turns out, apparently I was there on the weekend of all the high school. high schools in Bakersfield high school graduation. Yeah, you can't call that. People emailed me and they said, we wanted to come, but our kids were graduating. Yeah. The worst one I ever got in a club was they told me that this when I was coming up, I said, it seems a little light.

They're like, well, yeah, the, you know, ice sculpting contest. I was like, really? I'm being outdone by ice? Oh, yeah, that's too bad. Yeah, you know, Greg Warren, I think it was, told me he was working somewhere, and the sales were light and the guy goes, hey, it's not your fault, man, it's prom this weekend. Right.

And it's like, prom, high school students? Yeah. Did you ever do prom shows coming up? No, no. In New York, they had prom shows. Oh. It was a horrible idea. Wow.

to take kids in high school from prom. And rather than let them go party, they would bust them to the comic strip or Carolines. Wow. And some kids came from the Bronx. Some kids came from Long Island. But they were all kids. And they were all drunk.

And they would all rather be somewhere else having a good time. And they're now at a comedy club. And it started at like 1230, one o'clock. Oh, no. It was nightmare shows. You would wait all day. You know.

And as a comic, you just try and stay up till one o'clock, two o'clock in the morning to go just get your ass kicked by teenagers. Oh, that's awful. My cousin was taught at a school, and she kept trying to get me to do shows at her middle school. Oh, God. And I was like, no, I'm never going to do this. And if you keep asking, we may not talk anymore. But high school is my worst nightmare. High school students doing comedy for them.

Oh, yeah. That sounds awful. Brutal. Because they don't laugh. I did one, you know, Kyle Dunnigan? Yeah. Kyle and I did high school together when we were coming up. And they were like, you know, you got to be really clean.

You got to be really clean. And we were like, oh, okay. And he went up first. And the problem is you start bombing because it's high school. kids and they don't care about your apartment or your bills or whatever they don't get jokes they don't get jokes and he starts bombing and he starts going into a song of his about about the st patrick's day parade letting uh letting gay couples in the parade and one of the lines is and i i heard him starting go into it i'm like oh no i know the song and this should not be for high school students and he's

One line was like, if your ass be the ladle, me cock be the stew. Wow. No, if you're, if you're cock be the ladle, me ass, be the stew. And I'm like, oh, no. And so he does this thing. Then I go up, I start bombing and I start doing crowd work and hitting on the teacher, the cute teacher. And at the end of the night, the principal came up.

And he had, uh, some kids were holding brownies. and a sign, thank you for performing at our school. And they were all, you know, greeting us. And the principal comes barging in. He's got a Winnie the Poo tie on. Oh, gosh. He goes, what the hell were you thinking? If we cock me the late, he asked me this to do.

These are high school students. There are 14-year-old children out there. And we got in trouble. It felt like a principal, like it felt like we were back in school being attacked by the principal. It's tough to get yelled at a guy wearing a winning of a poo tie. It really hurt. It really hurt. I did a college thing.

This was before I really was even doing comedy, but my friend was a part of this. It was kind of a fraternity thing. And he goes, I can't do it. Will you do it? And it paid like a hundred bucks. And to me, that was, I was like, I was living in Charles so I could walk across the street

and make a hundred bucks. I was like, that's what I'm talking about. I remember being up there. I had this joke where I started, I go, I had this girl at my apartment the other night. And this guy goes, no, you didn't. and it's just like, oh, no. Yeah, you're right.

Tell me about life in Charleston. Because you talk about in your special, and it was a funny to hear of a Dusty's Past, which sounded a little drunk and a little rough and tumble. Yeah, I mean, I moved to Charleston at 21. Okay. I'm from Alabama, and I always looked young, so I never snuck into bars.

I drank a little bit, but I never snuck into bars. But I basically moved to Charleston, this nice city. Yeah. And now I can get into bars. And I just, you know, I had no class about me. No, I didn't know anything. But I can just get into bars. And I'm just getting hammered all the time.

Is that why you move there? Well, I moved to just get out of my hometown. I wanted to see a little something out. I just was like, bored. And I'm like, I think there's more. out here. Yeah. So I went to this city and I was having trouble meeting people, but you go into bars and that's where everyone's at. Right. So I'm just, I'm hanging out with the restaurant people that I work with and I'm just, you know, I'm just getting hammered. I don't know how to

handle myself. I don't realize that I later read an Alcoholics Anonymous book and realize I probably have this form of alcoholism like binge drinking to where once alcohol gets in your system, you're really fired up to drink. You just keep hammering. And that's probably what I have, if that's a thing to have. And I just would get wasted. And I would just make a fool of myself. And everyone was drinking and driving.

I mean, when you tell people about it now, they're so shocked by it. But I'm like, there was no Uber, no lift. There were some cabs, but it wasn't, you didn't just go out and hail a cab. No. You had to call a number. An ordeal. And they may come, they may not. Right, exactly.

So we just drove. And it wasn't even weird. Right. We all... Everyone left the bar and got in their car. Yeah, we would wait tables and we would leave the restaurant, go to a bar, and drink until they kicked us out. And then we'd all go get in our cars and drive home. Oh, my God.

Nobody thought it was weird at all. No. And sure, there were accidents and tragedies. Right. But we were just like, yeah, but we were like, that sucks, you know. Yeah, you didn't know how to do it. Yeah, and it sounds bad. I'm sensitive to it.

I know. I get it, but it is what we were doing. When you, when I was watching the special, I was with my daughter, and she's 20, and she grew up with Uber and all the stuff and kids that had gotten into crashes with. And I felt her when you said the Udrow driver, she like looked up. Yeah. It is such a weird thing. They don't realize that's kind of the way it was up until now.

Yeah, I mean, there was a time, even when we had phones where you would be like, oh, my phone died or I left my phone at home. And it wasn't a big deal. You're like, oh, that's too bad. You're like, yeah, it doesn't matter. Yeah. You had a Nokia. You dropped it and water on the way in.

Doesn't matter. Now we're like tied to our phones. It's amazing. But, yeah, I mean, we were just partying. I lived on the beach. Yeah. For a while, I lived downtown. I also lived on the beach for a while.

Oh, that's nice. And we would just, you know, downtown was about 15 minutes from the beach. Yeah. We would drink on the beach and then go, you want to go downtown? And then we'd drive downtown and then drink downtown and then we'd drive home back to the beach. So great. And what are you calling the special salty? Salt Life.

Salt Life. Salt Life. Yeah, everybody has these stickers on the back of the cars called Salt Life. I have seen a few that say slut life on the back. And they're just, I don't know why you would ever put that on your car, but I have seen that on car. And we, you know, we would just, I remember I left a party. In the joke, I say I was alone, but my friend was with me. And we wrecked.

And, you know, it was just like. And did you really flip? I really flipped. And it was, yeah, it was scary. Yeah. But we were going to walk home and a guy picks us up. It takes us home. And the next day, I have to go get my.

car. My car got towed in the night. Right. So I have to go get it. So I dress really nice. And I go out to eat with my friend. We go have lunch and we're like prepping. He has a beer at lunch. I'm like, I took a month off of drinking. And he's like, I don't know. I'm hung over. And I go, yeah, I go, I'm like, I'm so worried that I'm about to still get in trouble. Yeah, of course. So I prepare myself, you know, when you're in trouble, you speak properly, you dress nice, and you go, you have to get a release form from the police station

to get your car back. Say sir a lot. Yeah, and they just get, I go, yeah, swerve to miss a deer. They just gave me the release form. And I went to the tow truck company, and I had it in my head that the car's fine. Right. That I'm going to just drive right out of there. And it was demolished.

It looks so bad. not driveable not drivable i think i mean the the the the the whatever the axle of the car the front axle was ripped back oh my god where the accident was out there was a telephone pole and also a broken telephone pole not from me so i think an accident had happened there before same spot i had a it was a 90 degree turn and i think i sailed off and i hit the uh thing and it ripped the axle back and then spun us and flipped us oh my it must have been a horrific horrendous wreck. Oh, my God.

Did you have your seatbelt on? No, no. The airbags came out. We were never wearing the seatbelts back then. People, this was back when people would tell you they would go, it was a good thing you were drunk because your body was loose. Right. Whenever I would hear that, I was like, that's all you got to do.

We get a wreck, just kind of relax. Just be loose, you know? Yeah. And yeah, I mean, the car, we landed on the roof of the top. car. I found my glasses at the scene of the accident, along with a lot of my CDs. Oh, you got, we went to the scene. Yeah, got my glasses back. And your CDs? Some CDs are strewn about. It was a, yeah, it was a real mess. Oh, my God. You're lucky you were alive. I know. Jeez. Many times I'm lucky to be alive. Oh, really? It is, it's a man. That's the only wreck I had,

but I had quite a few fender benders back then. I love the line when you say, After the wreck, you start, you're like, I got to walk home. I don't know if I, if I don't know, I know if I don't know. I know if I stay. Yeah, I said, I don't know if I get in trouble for leaving the scene of the accident, but I know I'll get in trouble if I stay. Right. And that, yeah, you say, you got to get out of here.

Yeah. You got to go. Yeah. Can't be, can't be around the car when the cops show up. Drunk. Yeah. Just go. You got to get eyes like, I don't know what to do.

but being here is not going to help. Yeah, I mean, really, if you had stayed there, the cops come, you're in jail. Yeah, you got to get out of here. And I was always, I was just concerned about my job, you know, because I had a job where I drove for work. Oh, geez. You can't get a DUI and keep this job. Was this the pesticide time? It was a pesticide job, yeah.

Right. So I had to, I traded that car. Well, my mom had a car. We made a little money off insurance. I was still able to claim it. And then I had a 19-18. 84 Buickla Saber. Right.

So that's what I drove for a while after that. Yeah, I think my grandmother had that. I borrowed that a lot. It was a great. I wish I had the car now. Because it was a little raggedy and I didn't have any money to fix it. But, you know, I could do something to it now. It was classy.

It was, like, I think the shocks were bad or something, but just kind of floated. Yeah. It was, I used to get pulled over all the time in that car. Yeah. I got pulled over really drunk in that car. Me and the same guy, you don't learn a lot. You don't learn anything. You get you wreck your car drunk.

You're out driving your new one drunk. With the same guy. Same guy. It supports all your bad decisions. We were driving. We left a bar. Still a little daylight. And we were driving.

And we were on kind of a four lane but downtown. And a guy had left his gas tank flap open. And my buddy goes, he goes, close that thing. And so I'm driving hanging out the window trying to close the flap. And then I get pulled over. And I think the cop was leaving the force because he gave me a ticket, but way down the road, months and months, a ticket for no seatbelt, no, no registration, no, you know, I was a mess. And then when I went to court, he had left the force.

Oh, really? So all my charges got dropped. Oh, nice. Yeah. And he didn't clock that you were drunk? I don't know. I think I just happened to get the cop that was tired of the job. He's like, I don't even want to do it.

that paperwork. I'm about to quit soon. I got the cop on a two-week notice. He's like, I don't care. Did you close the flap? I don't, we never got the flap. Never did. Never got the fly. I like your friend just in the passenger seat, the dumbest advice he can give you. I had up, my friend was an alcoholic, and we were the kind of friends that we couldn't embarrass each other. So that's the best and worst kind of friend to have. Yeah. Because I would go out, I would go out drinking with friends and I'd get a little out of control and they would kind of go, they'd go, lock it up, you know? And then I go, okay, okay. But this guy, he didn't care. He was down for it. We get kicked out of a bar. We laugh our way to the next one.

I used to, we used to get into fights, not physical fights, but verbal alterations. I remember throwing a bunch of coasters at some people one time. They were arguing to me. I just threw the coasters. Do you ever have to fight? Like, first fight? I got beat up once. But I never really, I never wanted to fight. Right. I just wanted to push it right to the line. You're right. I wanted to see how mad could I make them without actually fighting?

And then one guy, one group across the line? Yeah, I got beat up by several people. I was pretty blacked out, got a little hazy drunk and got thrown down on the ground. I got kicked a bunch. Your friend's just watching. He got kicked out. I don't know. Actually, to this day, I don't know what happened to him.

I think he got afraid. He said he got kicked out. I think he was afraid. He just ran and left you. I think so. I think so. How long was this period of your life? Until 29.

I was, so for about eight years. It's a long run. Yeah, it's a long run. Longer than it should have. And eventually, but I, you know, I switched friends. Wow. I would move around. And then I, you know, about, I would say, 2008.

So what would that put us? How old would I be in 2008? 26. So about five years into that, I started doing comedy. Okay. So I started hanging out with a bit of a different crew of people. Right. We were still getting hammered, but nobody was trying to fight,

so it kind of became a different thing. Right, right. So the last few years, it was a little more calm. And was it because you were getting on stage? I think so. I was able to get a little of that energy I had out. Right. I think I was just craving some sort of attention.

And then when I would drink, I would just try to get it any way I could. Right. Tossing coasters. Yeah, yell at some people. Right. But then when I started doing comedy, then I could, you know, now I could, you know, make people laugh and meet people that way. And it was getting better. So it's getting better.

But so when you were starting to stand up, were you going up drunk? Were you drinking for your shows and stuff? In the early days, I was. hosting an open mic at a place called the Upper Deck, which was a real dive bar, smelled like urine so they would burn incense in there to, but it was still a hipster college bar. Where? Uh-huh. So you would have to go in a little alleyway and then upstairs, a very cool bar.

Yeah. And so I started doing an open mic there, and I would get drunk throughout the mic because my, there was no pay. It was just, I would get a bar tab. They gave me a free bar tab. Uh-huh. So I would just drink throughout the night. So it started off smooth, but as the night would go on,

I would introduce a comic, and then I would just disappear. I would be drinking or smoking cigarettes out front. I had comics who had never done comedy, who didn't know what to do. Doing 10 minutes. Doing 10, 15 minutes. They had no idea.

They didn't know to just get off the stage. I didn't know how to run a mic. I was just trying to get stage time. I was in the bar drinking, and I told my friend, I go, what we need, because we had no comedy club. We had no structure. I go, what we need is a place to do comedy every week. And I didn't know I was sitting next to the owner.

And he goes, here, every Monday. So we just start showing up and taking over. Yeah, yeah. And that was our path into comedy. That's good. All of us, we were just improvisers. Were you a different kind of comic? We all are when you start.

I was a little dirtier, but I've always been pretty clean. but, you know, I was kind of, other than when I would go on these drunk rants, I was a bit more of a deadpan comic than I am now. I really liked Mitch Hedberg when I first started, so I was really doing a Mitch thing, trying to do a lot of one-liners. And I love that. But, you know, I don't know, what he does or did was very special. Very special.

But I thought about him last night when I was watching your special, actually. The way you kind of kicked your head back and the hair, He had not the same hair, but hair was a thing. Yeah. And he did pop into my mind. Yeah, I, you know, for years I only listened to Mitch Hedberg. I had never actually seen what he looked like. Right.

I had the Strategic Grill Locations album. I remember a girl come over to my apartment. I still think about this. She was very attractive. And I think we might have hooked up. We didn't, but I think we could have. And I think about it sometimes. and I'm upset with Mitch Edberg, but I had this album, we put it on, and it was so good that we just listened to the whole thing and laughed the whole time.

Yeah. And I go, when it was over, I go, my neighbors have to hear this. So I took it upstairs, and me and her went upstairs to my neighbor's house and listened to it again. Amazing. And, yeah, I mean, it all works out for the best. Yeah. I just remember being so blown away. I'd never heard comedy like that.

Yeah, it was really special. Yeah. Such a shame. He would have been so huge. I know. God, I remember he came to the cellar once. I was just finding my way there. And he came in in like this fur jacket.

It was like so poofy. Like his head was just like nestled in this big white, nesty, kind of like poofy thing. And he had the glasses and the big reddish sunglasses. And it was like, what is this guy? He's so different from all of us. Oh, yeah.

And then we just fire these great jokes and then leave. It was just amazing. Yeah, I mean, I really hate that I miss that whole thing. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, that album was great. And then I also was listening to an album, the Steve Martin Let's Get Small album. It's the first one I ever heard. Oh, yeah.

First comedy album I ever heard. I love that album so much. So good. And when I listen to it now, I can hear. stuff that I've influenced that I've taken for that. Oh yeah. And I just, I love how he could be so absurd and so serious at the same time. He's like the straight man and the absurd guy all in one person. And I love that. Yeah. And I just, you have that. And it, yeah, just, it just, I don't know, to me, it showed me it's like, you really can do whatever. You can be silly, but not over the top.

Yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, it's, you could be silly once you, once, I don't know if this is universal. I mean, there's probably guys that are just silly, but for your kind of thing, you can be silly because they know you're smart. Yeah. So they know, like, they're watching you tell all this stuff and have these insights. And then being silly is like, it just, you create a space for yourself. Yeah, and that's why I like a Joe. We did talk about this. Absolutely, but that's why I like a joke that I have that I say well over 50, where the joke is that the joke is not that good. Right. Right.

And you make fun of the fact that you wrote a joke that's not that good. Yeah. But in making fun of that joke, you're now making people laugh. Yeah. So if you're making people laugh, is it a bad joke? Right. And then you bring it back, which is so great. Yeah.

You bring it back once or twice. I think once. I did have another time where I was trying to bring it back. And then I thought, well, maybe I do it do it twice. I think you might. And you kind of sneak it in and it does great. Yeah. This joke that you said it doesn't do that great and you prove that it doesn't do that great.

And then you get a laugh over that. But then later on, it like really works. Yeah, you know, I've kept jokes in the past in a set just because it's a good callback later. Like the joke itself might be okay. Yeah. But it's worth it to just plant that little seed just to do the callback later. Yeah, yeah. That's where we, like, living in this age of comedy clips.

We lose the whole callback. Right. I love callbacks, and I think it's a big part of comedy, and we lost it because everybody just wants clips. I know, and you do such a good job with it in this special. I think you have, like, three or four callbacks. I love callbacks. Really good.

I think callbacks are so fun. They're so fun, especially when they're subtle. Yeah. When they're kind of, like, sneaky, and you don't see it coming. and it, and it was just really well done. Yeah, because we, you know, in Charleston, we were just all these improvisers and we had no stand-up club. We just had an improv scene.

So it was all these improvisers that just decided to do stand-up. So we were just doing it with ourselves. And, you know, we would all help each other. And then in improv, we did mostly long-form improv. So you're kind of learning these callbacks because you have the first part and then the whole second part of the show is to do callbacks. Yeah, yeah. So we're like, we're all into it.

Yeah, yeah. And then, you know, we would make, like, road comics would come through and do our mics, and we would all make fun of them. And we felt like we were all better than them. Right. And then I started working the road later and realized how good these road comics were that we were making fun of. Right. They're like, wow, these guys really, because I started to struggle on the road.

Right. Because I'm like, well, the audiences I'm dealing with a lot of times, they're not into this quirky improv stuff. Yeah, yeah. So I started switching it up, you know, and I started wearing a trucker hat as kind of a joke, because I had trucker hats that I would wear, but I thought they were funny. And I started wearing them in some of these clubs. And it, it like started to help me in a weird way. I felt like it now opened this door to some of these road gigs. How so?

I just felt like, I don't know, I looked, I don't know, I felt like I was looking more of a. Like you belong? Yeah, I was doing, I was still doing trailer park jokes. Right. But I think before I started wearing the hat, they thought I was making fun of them. Right. And then with a hat, they were like, oh, this guy's one of us. Right.

And then I just love wearing a hat. And I was like, oh, okay, well, I'll just do that. It is great. Yeah. I wish I had thought of that. I wouldn't have to just watch my hair slowly go away. Yeah, it's never too late to wear a hat, you know? Yeah.

Yeah. I wear hats all the time, but never on stage. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe I will. Your trailer park stuff is so funny when you talk about the porch and all of that. Oh, yeah.

Well, you know, that joke, too, it's like, see, I brought back one old joke from the Netflix half hour that I did. I brought an old joke about country music. I say a good country song can have you reminiscent about times you never had. Such a great line. And I brought it back because I wanted to do that Joe Diffy joke. And the Joe Diffy joke, I feel like needs that setup. Right.

Because that is that. When I... Right. I listened to him talk about his home, and I remember thinking, oh, yeah, home was an easy chair with my daddy there. And I'm like, well, my parents are divorced. Right. He had an easy chair, but it was in... It was in...

One at our house. Right. With his other family. Yeah. So I'm like that. And then, you know, and then I'm thinking about my mom. And then I go, you know, in a trailer, we don't even have a back porch because we don't have a back. Right.

The front is this little narrow part and the back is really narrow. And that joke always faded out. Oh, really? It's like a song that, you know, there's no ending. They just keep playing and the volume fades out. It's so funny. You mean the side? As I get to the end of the joke, that's why I started doing that joke where I go,

a lot of these jokes in long before I stop talking. To me, it's all about, you know, that's the silliness of it. Right, right. It's like every joke is not going to have the perfect. ending, but can we still find a way to make it funny? Right, right. So good. And that's why, like, that Steve Martin, let's get small. I mean, he's got to, he go, one party goes, uh, we're having some fun now. And I just think that's so fun. It's just so silly. He's like, he goes, I am waiting for the drugs to take a fact. Grandpa bought a rubber. And I didn't even know what a rubber was at the time.

Can I ask you a question? Sure. You like country music. Are you upset that pop stars are getting into it? Yeah, actually I talk about this a lot. And I don't think anyone cares about my opinion. I do. That's why I'm asking.

In the country music world. I just did a interview with the Rolling Stone, which is very exciting for me. That's cool. And they titled it that I'm saying that what is country and what's not country. But it is upsetting. Yeah. Like, because it wouldn't upset me if they made country and sounded country. Like, I would love to hear the real Beyonce country album.

Like, let's do some real, like, let's do Beyonce doing some covers of some classic country. She covered Jolene, but then changed Jolene. You know, it's like, that's what I want to hear. Right. Let's hear Post Malone cover a Hank senior song. Right. Right, right, yeah. Let's not, I mean, their country has become so pop.

It's really pop. That pop singers are getting in there, and it's just like, yeah, you're just doing the pop country thing. It's more like it's just marketing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's like Beyonce's won every award. So we've got to get her into country so she can win a country award. Right.

There's no more awards left for her to win. Yeah. Do you like Sturgle Simpson? I love Sturgle. I like, I mean, that. that meta, modern country sounds or whatever the album is. So good. So good.

Yeah. And his bluegrass one was good. And then the one that he's done as Johnny Blues guys, I like it. It didn't have the impact that that early one had on me. Yeah. It's still good. Yeah. Yeah.

I think he's one of those guys. Like he earned your loyalty just from that first album that you'll go wherever he wants to go. Absolutely. And, you know, I think he's covered some. He did a whole Grateful Dead thing. Oh, really? Which I became a Grateful Dead fan late in life. I never was into it.

And then I just discovered it a couple of years ago. Oh, really? And I was just like, this is good. Yeah, it's really good. Like, I knew the, you know, Uncle John's band and, you know, a few of the ones. Shakedown Street. Yeah. But I heard it was a, it's a live album.

I never can remember the album. But I heard it on Spotify one day and I go, wow, this is great. Yeah, with the Jerry years. Yeah. I used to go see them all the time. And then I saw Sturgle covering a couple of songs live. I didn't see it live, but I saw a live version. Oh, really?

I didn't know he did that. Oh, this is great. My other guy I really like is Tyler Childers. I like him, too. I don't know a ton of his stuff, but I do, I do like him. You would really like him. Yeah. His writing is so good.

Yeah, I like the one song that he refuses to play now. Yeah, pretty. Yeah. Little Feathered Indians. Yeah, I think, I mean, you know, I just saw the Bob Dylan movie and I really like it. And I liked, in which I feel like I'm kind of sick of like movies about musicians. But for whatever reason I watched it, I used to love Bob Dylan. Yeah.

And I like this a lot. Yeah, it was great. And I like that he is like, I'm going to play whatever I want to play. And I don't care if what you want me to play. you want me to play. Yeah. And I feel like that about Tyler Jilders. I mean, he's like, listen, I know you like the song. Yeah. But you can hear that on a record. Let me play my new stuff. Yeah. And it's really because it's out of respect for his wife, right? Oh, I don't know why. I just assumed he's like, quit telling me to play that song. I heard, I heard that it was because

his wife knows it was about his ex. Oh. And out of respect for her, he doesn't, he doesn't do it. I like that. Yeah, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, sits well. I like that. Yeah. Yeah, you know, but I also... It's such a good song, though. It is a good song. It's a really good. Yeah. You know, but I was like, I saw Damien Rice. I used to really like Damien Rice. Uh, and I saw him at the Ryman one time. And people just kept yelling, requested him. Oh, yeah. I hated it so much. I was like, just let him play. Let him do his thing. But even my friend that I was with, she was like, well, we paid money to see him. He should play the songs we want to play. Oh, geez. He's a really good musician. Just let him, he's out of jukebox.

Just let him play what he wants to play. Yeah. Anything you're listening to now? I listen, you know, I'm always listening to Country. I can't think of anything new. I'm, you know, I like classical music a lot and I listen to a lot of cello music. Oh, yeah. Bach? Well, I just find cello is so relaxing. There's other classical that can, like, fire you up. Yeah. That's not why I'm listening. I do listen to some of that.

But cello is very relaxing. Yeah. And I love it. Yeah. And I try to, any, anytime you look up cello, it's that yo-yo ma, always that one song. The box. So I have to find it and then delete that one off the playlist. Because you've heard it a thousand times.

Yeah, no. And then go to all the rest of them. Yeah. Yeah. I wish that I had somebody. I mean, my friend Jesse Daniel, he's a California country guy. Oh, yeah. He has a lot of good stuff.

He has a new album. I like his stuff. Oh, cool. There's a lot of new country out there that I really like. We talked about Colterwall earlier. Yeah, so good. Yeah. Really good voice.

If you had a bottle of water, would you rather it be still or sparkling? Oh, still all day. Yeah. I can't get into the sparkling water. I've had some. I just, I don't know. Was the water on stage and you made those jokes about it not being cracked? that a real moment or? It was a real moment. It was. It was a real, because I feel like when you're

recording, right, you can, you can play around a little bit because if it doesn't pay off, you can just cut it. Yeah. But yeah, I actually make a lot of water bottle jokes, uh, in my shows, but yeah, when I turned it, it was not. It didn't crack. Yeah, but I was like, that's all I got out here. I might be dying. I make jokes about water all the time and they, my water bottle jokes bomb a lot. What I like to do is bomb a water bottle joke and then go, that's not the worst water bottle joke I've ever told. I've got more.

Do you have any scars? I got a few. I got one on my knuckle here from when I was probably a year old. I remember this is a memory that I have, a very, very glimsy memory where I was hanging on a tile rack in the back. My dad's house. My sister was in the bathtub with me, and my sister, we have the same mom, different dad. So my parents were still married. And the towel rack broke. And it was a ceramic tile wall and it cut my finger. And I just remember that. I remember falling. And that's all I remember. But it's a very glimsy memory. Yeah, yeah. Anything that's really like violent like that, there's a memory attached. That's why I feel like I know I wasn't beat as a child because I don't remember it. Right.

I feel like I would have. Yeah. Or maybe my mind used the towel rack to cover up something else. It was really your dad on his way out. Yeah. But, you know, I don't get hurt too much these days, but I have little scars on both of my hands from a four-wheeler accidents. Right.

We used to ride a lot of four-wheelers. I flipped one and scraped the hand. Right. And then we used to, we used to tie things to the back of the four-wheelers. wheeler and drag around the yard. Like an old wagon we had. Like when the wheels fell off, we just had the top of the red wagon, and we would just sit in it and pull.

And then another, we tied a tire to it, and we would just hang on to the tire. But I wanted to get a good grip. This tells you how smart I was as a kid. I wanted to get a good grip, so I gripped it on both sides. Oh, no. My hand under the tire and one on top. Oh, no. And then when the four-wheeler took off, obviously, my hands dragging the

ground. So that left that scar there. Jeez. Yeah. Was it fun being in a trailer park? I had a great time. Yeah. I loved it. You know, my parents are divorced. So my dad lives on a farm and my mom lived in the trailer park, but I live with my mom. So that's where I was most of the time. Right. Well, both places, we were kind of out in the country. My mom's trailer that was woods behind and woods on the other side. It didn't belong to us. Right. But we were in those woods all the time. So I was really a woods I was out in the woods all the time. Yeah.

A lot of, I got, you know, beat up a lie. I got shot in the chest with a BB gun when I was a kid. Oh, really? Went to the hospital. My cousin shot me and went into my chest, through my lung. No. As far as I know, the BB still inside my body to the day. Oh, my God.

Why did he shoot you by a mistake or just playing around? He shot me on purpose, but he didn't think the gun was loaded. Oh, geez. Yeah, so it was like my grandfather's air rifle, which, you know, They were, everything was stronger back then. Yeah. So it really, but I was just in the hospital overnight. Jeez.

The doctor was like, the doctor told my daddy, he goes, we can leave it in or we can take it out. And my dad was like, well, just leave it in. I guess it would have to do surgery to get it out. Yeah, yeah. Leave it in. That would be cool. Yeah.

If you can get an x-ray and see it. Well, in my 20s, I did get an x-ray and it was still in there. Oh, really? Yeah. So, just hanging out. It's probably, you know, it doesn't, metal detectors. don't pick it up. Right.

The MRI didn't move it. I've had MRIs done. Right. I said, if the MRI rips this thing out, I want it. Right. You don't get to keep it.

It's just fun knowing you have a BB in you. Yeah. We do a thing on this program called an uncomfortable moment. And, you know, you talk famously about the way you grew up and stuff.

And I don't know, I was wondering if you could explain this photo that we found of you as a young person. Oh, oh, yeah. Seems like you lived in a mansion with a lot of cars. I don't know where you found this photo. I tried so hard to hide these. But, yeah, that is my mom's place. I don't see like a wagon being dragged around this yard.

No, well, you could see if we were how those, that tile, that. That driveway would hurt. Yeah. Well, that is uncomfortable because that kind of blows my whole gig here. But yeah, listen, poor as relative. You should have saw the neighbor's house. We got made fun of a lot. I was poor compared to what they had going on.

Now that you're successful and you have this great career going. And are you afraid that your kids are going to grow up soft? Well, I do think about it because I'm like, but I don't know what to do. I do think about it. Now, I have a little land. I bought some land in McMinville, Tennessee, which is about an hour and a half outside of Nashville. And we go out there, my daughter and son, they play in the creek. And they get, you know, they get scraped up and they get bit by fire ants and things like that.

So they are experiencing things. Right. So I want them to, they won't, hopefully, if things keep going well, they won't get the same public school experience that I got. I'd like to keep them from that. Yeah. I enjoyed it. You liked it. I liked it, but I think times are different.

Right. You know, I still got punched in the face, and I got punched in the bathroom one time. I was in the urinal, and a guy tapped me on the shoulder, and I turned around, he punched me twice in the face. So we had that going on. I got stabbed by a girl with a pencil. in the eighth grade. She stabbed me a few times. Why? Because I, she stole something for me and I pushed her head and then she stabbed me a bunch of times. And no teachers intervened. No, there was no teacher in the room, but I did snitch. The moment the teacher came back, I said, she just stabbed me. And she got expelled.

I never saw her again. Oh, for real? Yeah, I got a day of in-school suspension for pushing her head. But we never saw her again, thankfully. I have been talking. I have been talking. talking about the story recently, so I feel like she will be tracking me down. With a pencil. With a pencil. I was on the football team. That was the one year that I was on the football team. And I got made fun of by the coach for getting stabbed by a girl.

But she was bigger than me. I don't know why that was even funny to them. They all knew who she was. Oh, really? She stabbed several people that day. She was just on a spree? Same pencil? Yeah, I don't know if it was the same pencil.

but she might have had an arsenal there. Oh, man. You know, I got headbutted in P.E. And my eye got swollen shut. I used to get my locker broken into a lot. It was a wild school. So I hate to rob my kids of that experience. Yeah.

But I would, you know, I think, I know some private school kids and they're doing okay. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Without trauma. Yeah. I mean, and it's like other, I, feel like, I feel blessed because other kids that I knew that grew up in the trailer park,

they have much worse stories than me. In what way? Well, I just think I had good parents, right? As many faults as I could say that my parents had, I think I had good parents. Right. These other kids, they, not only did they live in a trailer, but their parents were bad. Right. And I've just like, oh, that's much worse.

Yeah. Would you see them when you were, like, playing around that you knew that it was like wild people in the... Oh, yeah. Well, for sure. There were many trailer parks, you know, so in my town. Even, I grew up right next to the college, Auburn University, and, you know, campus, they would have trailer parks that a lot of kids would stay in when they went to school. We would, later, I would party at these college trailer parks. Right, right. But, you know. College kids, like, they're off campus housing. Yeah, and it's like, it was great for parties because you're not, you know, you don't get the police called as often when you're in your old trailer. Yeah. But, you know,

I just talk to kids now that I grew up with, and they would tell me about their lives growing up. And I go, oh, gosh. Yeah. I had no idea. My, you know, my parents loved me. Right. They weren't playing with guns and fighting with each other. Yeah.

I mean, you know, we were all playing with a few guns. Right. But not the fun ones. Yeah. Yeah. But, yeah, I mean, so. It's so funny when you're a kid, it doesn't matter. you're just growing up.

There's no metric of what's rich and what's not and what's having a lot. And it's not until like high school and you like visit someone, you're like, whoa. That's true. You live like this? I told this story on your show with Fortune the first time I ever did it. And also I have it on my, you know, special. But it's like it wasn't, you're right, it wasn't until high school that I really started to become self-conscious. Yeah.

Because my address was Lot 8 Morse trailer park, right? which I've now made my company, my LLC or whatever. It's now lot eight. So I, you know, and I never, I'm sure my mom's heard all this. So I don't want to make her feel bad. But I, she's heard it though. But it's like, you know, getting my learners permit at 15, I knew that day was coming. And I was so worried to have my lot eight address on my driver's license.

And we moved into a house by the time I turned 15. And that was a big day for me. It's a big deal. Big deal. Because when you get your learners permit, everybody wants to see it. Right. They go, let's see your pick. And they would all see my address.

Would you still, would you get teased? Like, was there, were there a lot of kids in that area? I don't even know that I would have got teased. But I just, I don't know. In my head, I was like, I'm going to be the poor kid. We were just talking about, I had, I was hanging with carrot top the other day. And we were talking about how there's nothing worse growing up in the, other kids laughing at you.

Yeah. Right? There's just some, the power of that. It's so, you're doing everything in your life to try and fit in, not call attention to yourself. And then like you walk into school and your pants are too short. And then you're just, you're wrecked for the month. Yeah.

You know what I mean? So yeah, I could imagine like having that address when you're 14 is just like, oof. Yeah, you know, and it's like, I think sometimes, you know, if I, if I went back, to high school now, like if I, same body, but in my mind now, how much cooler I would be, but I think it would be the opposite. It takes so long. You know, you think it'd be the opposite? I think so.

I think I'm much lamer now. I'm like, I have, like, adult brain. And now I'm in high school being like, this doesn't make sense. Yeah, but it'd be funny to see if, like, I thought you were going to say that you, as an adult, like you would go back and be like, you don't care what people think about you because you're an adult. It wouldn't take long to feel it's pretty shitty about yourself all over again. Yeah, because you walk in like, I don't care.

But you're like, now you're like, oh, this is my world, though. I have to care because I don't just get to leave here and go back to my wife and kids. This is, this is, because you think about like moments, I'll think about moments with girls where I go, ah, if I had to did this or this, this would have gone a lot better. And I think if I could go back. I would do it better. I would I, though?

If I could go back with my adult brain, would I even be in the situation? The girl would be like, this guy's lame. He talks like my dad. We'd like to thank the good people at Quince for sponsoring today's program. If you spend a lot of time cooking at home,

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What kind of dad are you shaping up to be? I think I'm... You think you're going to be strict? I think I'm a good dad, but, you know, sometimes I get stressed and I yell at my kids. Yeah. And I think, well, this is old school parenting, you know? Yeah. Yell at the kids a little bit.

Yeah, which is okay. I garden a little bit, and my son, he's two, and I'll be out there with him. then he just starts ripping like little peppers that are not ready to be ripped. He rips them off and green tomatoes. And I go, no. And he just keeps doing it. And then I'm yelling at him. And then I go, what is it matter?

Yeah. Is it better to let him rip the tomatoes off than to yell at him out here? I know. I know. That is like, it goes, I would always go back and forth with that. But the weird part is, even though you want to be cool, then you see him rip a another pepper off, and you can't even control it. It just comes out.

I go, why are you not listening? Yeah. What's going? Why are you not listening? You know what no means. Yeah. Stop doing that. Because I always see, you always hear about grandparents.

It's like, well, when you're a grandparent, then you can really enjoy it because you can just let them do whatever they want. You don't have to discipline them. You can just love them. Oh, yeah. And I always thought, well, why not just love them as a parent? But it doesn't work that way. No.

Yeah. No, and it's like, you know, sometimes I yell at my kids and I, and then, because my wife stays at home with the kids, I'll yell at my kids and then later at night I'll say to my wife, I'll go, hey, I'm sorry I did that earlier, you know, and she goes, what? She goes, I do that all the time. She goes, I'm happy to see you yelling at them so they don't think it's just me. Right. Yeah, my wife would really like when you bring down the hammer. Yeah. You see her kick back a little bit like, yeah, go get them.

She's like, I think I've ruined my relationship with her. daughter for yelling at her. She's like, I just can't handle it all day. Yeah. So when your, when your parents had split and people and you're back and forth and stuff, was, were you a lot freer than if, uh, did they both try and like be nice to you so you would like them more? I do think so. Yeah. I think so. Because I, my, you know, I wasn't, I was older when my dad really started yelling at me. Uh-huh. And when I was younger, I really feel like my dad was trying to like really get me to, well, I know he was trying to get me to come live with him. But my dad married another lady with kids.

And I think if he hadn't, I probably would have, you know, but I'm like, I don't really even like this lady. The kids are fine, but I don't like this lady. And my mom didn't remarry. My mom had a fun, you know, we had a, she had two daughters from her first marriage. So we had like, you know, we had a cool vibe. It was like me and a bunch of ladies hanging out at the trailer, watching W. WWF and grease.

And, yeah, I'm getting a weird. In a good mix. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I know all the Hulk Hogan things, but I also know all the soundtrack to grease. Right. That's pretty cool. Yeah.

Do you have to brush your hair out? I do have to because it, but sometimes if I'm, you know, if I'm off the road a little bit or sometimes I'll forget a brush. And it gets pretty naughty. It does. And then I'll make jokes about it on stage. earlier this year, probably in about March, I was going out and I'd go, sorry, guys, I forgot to brush my hair this year. And that would get a good laugh. Because it just, in the back, it'll get

so nodded. And then it almost sticks up in a way. And I don't notice until I see a picture of myself later. And I go, geez, people see a special of me. I have makeup and somebody did my hair. And then they see me live. And they go, what happened to this guy? He was so slick. Yeah. How do you sleep with it? Do you? have to put it up? I do try to put it up. Yeah. I don't like doing it because sometimes I sleep on my back a little bit. Not in the back of my head, but if not, my hair will get in my face in the night, and I'll hear my mouth. I'll wake up and I'm like, ah. Is this the longest it's ever been? No, I just got to cut a little bit. Oh, yeah. It doesn't, well, that's not much longer than this,

but sometimes it gets a bit long. Right, yeah. I don't like it to get that long, but I don't know. I don't know what to do with my hair these days. Sometimes I, sometimes I want to just let it grow real long. Sometimes I did, I did Nate's movie. I did the breadwinner. I didn't know. Oh, yeah. And the lady doing my hair put it in pigtail. She's like, this is what I'm going to do. I'm going to wet it. I'm going to put it in pig tails. I'm going to let it dry and then take it out and you'll have like all these kind of curls and ruffles. And I go, okay, cool. And we put it in. And then she goes, I kind of like it like this. What do you think? I go. Yeah, let's do it.

So in the movie, I had pigtails. And then I kept it all the way through the airport the next day or later that day. I was like, this feels cool. And then before I got home, though, I was like, now I'm taking this out. I don't want my kids to see me like this. How's the movie? I don't know. It's not out.

But my scene was good. What's it about? I don't know if he wants to even say. But I think the basic premise is that his wife becomes. the breadwinner of the show. Right, right. Of the movie. That's pretty funny.

Yeah, so. That's, that's Nate. Yeah, but I got a little speak and roll. That's good. Is that your first one? It's my first one. Oh, nice.

I updated my IMDB. I got an account and I updated it and then it like un-updated itself. So I don't know what happened. I guess IMDB went back in and they go, I don't think so. We don't like what you've done here. We don't think you're really in this movie. Yeah. I got a couple of specials.

I got, you know. Yeah. I'm like, come on. Guys, let me put a picture of myself here. I'm excited to see your Cracker Barrel. Oh, yeah. I got a Cracker Barrel commercial out there. Yeah.

First national commercial. That's cool. You know, what happened was I did on my first special working man, I did a Cracker Barrel joke. Right. And I talked positively about the Cracker Barrel. Oh, nice. So they gave me a commercial. They go, you know what?

Here's a guy, not making fun of us. What was the take on it? Well, I said, well, my first was a joke on what. one of their billboards. They had a sign that said, biscuits are like spoons you can eat. Oh, right. And I was like, I don't think so, guys. Biscuit ain't nothing like a spoon. You know, it's like, and all these signs were in the South. I don't want people driving through the South thinking we're down here trying to eat spoons, you know. But, but, you know, I said, good for our image. Yeah, but, you know, I said, you know, Cracker Barrel has a great chicken and dumplings.

They have a really good chicken and dumplings. And you can also get a side of dumplings. So that's the only place you can get chicken and dumplings and dumplings. You can't do that anywhere else. That's great. And they caught wind of it. Now you're a spokesman. Now I'm the spokesman.

It's amazing. Yeah. Do you have radio spots, too? Or is it just the TV spot? I'd like to get more Cracker Barrel stuff because the headquarters is in Lebanon, which is right next to, Nashville. Oh, right. And so I, people from L.A.

flew in to film the commercial. Right. And I drove 10 minutes. That's amazing. This is what I'm talking about. That's really good. Does it make you think you should talk about certain other products in your specials? It does.

I was told, yeah, I should, I think the next special I'm going to talk about how much I love Chevy Silverado. I mean, they are the best truck and the best looking truck. Right. Do you have a tractor on your land? I don't have a tractor, but I wouldn't mind a new John Deere. Those are the best tractors. But both are true, though. I would love those.

I do want to get a tractor at some point. I want to get one with a backhoe on it so I can dig some holes. Yeah, that would be fun. I do want to be able to dig around a bit. Yeah, that would be fun. I hate having to hire people to dig. Yeah. I'd like to do my own digging.

That would be good. What are you digging for? Well, I don't know. I like swales, you know, there's a part of, there's a farming technique where they talk about, like if you have kind of a slant, you dig like, and then the rain comes, it just, the water just runs off and doesn't really soak in. Right. If you have little swales, it gives the opportunity to soak in.

Oh, nice. So I want to build a lot of those around my land, a lot of sway. I got this idea. I got a pond idea. Uh-huh. I got a creek down at my land at the bottom of the hill. the creek is all mountain stream fed. So all this, so it's crystal clear water.

What I want to do is get a solar pump and build a small pond at the top of my land, pump water into the pond, and then have a channeling system. So the water runs all the way through the land, eventually feeding back to the creek. So I'm not stealing the water. I'm just borrowing it. Right. But I'm watering the whole land. Oh, that's nice.

And then give, I've already attracted more birds to my land, having these swales. and yeah, I want so it can get more birds and, you know, deer and turkeys to come up. And are you growing stuff that you want to eat? I got fruit trees. But what I want is the whole food forest idea where you have a canopy of different, you know, you have your bigger, you could have like, say, like a pecan tree, very big tree, fruit bearing, and then you have an apple tree, and then maybe a blueberry bush, and then strawberries as a ground cover. So every layer is food bearing. Oh, that'd be nice. That's the idea.

And what do you do when the family of bears come in? Well, I think the idea is that you have enough food for all of nature to be able to eat a little bit. Right. And we all have some. That's nice. So hopefully when the bears come, I can see them, give them a little tip of the hat. They'll be respectful. Yeah, they go.

We appreciate it. They'll tell their kids stop. You've had enough. Yeah. This guy's being cool. Yeah. And then, you know, that's what I'm into. That sounds great.

Yeah. Do you get a lot of time to go up there? I don't get very much time. Yeah. I did go recently for a few days, but I don't have Wi-Fi out there. I don't want Wi-Fi, but it always feels like I plan a trip, and then, you know, my management's like, hey, we got some Zoom calls for you. Yeah.

Can we just make these regular phone calls? Yeah, right. We have to look at each other. I know, enough already. This is what COVID did two things. One good, one bad, right? Good thing is a lot of in-person meetings can now become Zooms. That's the good thing.

The bad thing is regular phone calls are now Zooms. There's no need for this. Yeah. Yeah, you should be able to just call. Do you call your friends, just a phone call? A little bit. I have a few friends I talk to. Yeah, I'm doing that more.

And the big thing is just calling them out of the blue, not saying I'm going to call. Yeah. That really feels like an invasion of some people. I like doing that because they pick up because they think it's an emergency. But really, I'm like, hey, I'm driving from Kansas to Arkansas and I just needed a friend. Right. I just want to talk this hour out.

Yeah. You got an hour? Because I am bored. You're heading out on the road right now? Yeah. This weekend, I'm in. in Huntsville, Alabama, on Friday. It's Saturday in Atlanta, Georgia.

Huntsville is where they, isn't that where the NASA started? That's where NASA is, yeah. Right, yeah. Yeah. They have some cool rockets around there. Yeah, Huntsville's now the new biggest city in Alabama, I think. Oh, really? I just told they've taken over Birmingham.

Oh, nice. Was it a bloody fight or? I think they just, more people move there. Oh, that's good. That's peaceful. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, and then, you know, I'm going up to Wisconsin. I just do weekends. really. I try to keep it because I got two small kids and I don't want to be gone all the time.

So I try to, I just go out Friday and Saturday, come home, go back out. But I do have next Thursday I go out because I got a Cracker Barrel corporate gig. Whoa, no way. Oh, man, you're going to have so much Cracker Barrel. I know. I'm fully immersed in Cracker Barrow. That's amazing. I like to think they cater their own corporate events and it's just, you know, those big metal dishes with the fire underneath it, just chicken and dumplings all across the board. That's amazing. Do you want to touch my provolone?

Yes, I do. Wow. Look at that thing. Oh, yeah. That's a good provolone. Right? Got some girth to it. Yeah, it's a big one.

Yeah. You're the first guest to touch it. Oh, nobody touches it? Nope. I do that. Yeah. You know, people bring me food sometimes to my shows and I ate it. Yeah.

And I had a guy at the club goes, oh, you're the first comic I've ever seen eat the stuff that people bring. I go, what? everybody's not eaten? I eat it too. Yeah, I tell my wife I don't. But I eat everything. I figure, especially if it's baked goods, I'm like, how much would they have to hate you to like bake a pie to get you?

Yeah, and if it does kill you, what a way to go. They go, yeah, got poisoned by a fan. Apparently the guy had been commenting online and Dusty was going back and forth with him, which is what I do. Yeah, made some donuts. and killed them. I call people idiots. I bake this bread for you. Oh, thank you.

I actually been eyeing this, hoping it was mine. It is yours. It is yours. I made it this morning. No, last night. Last night. Stayed up late. Thank you. I was like, either I got to get up early and bake it, or I can just go till about midnight.

And, yeah, it's yours. Thank you. You're welcome. And it's too bad you have to go to the comedy store tonight. You could have just taken it back to your hotel and eat now. I know. will probably be sitting in a parking lot somewhere eating this bread. If I can stop off at a store and find some cheese, I'll eat quite a bit of this way.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, there you go. I love bread and cheese on the road. Oh, it's the best. It's nothing better. Yeah, a loaf like this, just ripping off little pieces. So good. The only thing for me, I really like red wine with that. Oh, yeah.

And you don't drink anymore. No, I used to, I stopped eating rotisserie chicken, too, but I used to, when I would sell pesticides. Every once in a while, we'd have to call on a Walmart. So I'd go in there and get a loaf of bread and a rotissory chicken and sit out in the parking lot and eat that. Oh, that's good. Why are you off the rotissary chicken? I don't know. I feel like I read stuff that they're doing stuff to the rotisserie. Oh, no, really? Yeah, something's not good. Oh, geez. That's unfortunate. That's unfortunate. Yeah. It is unfortunate. Because now, even if they're not, I can't eat it and not think about it.

Yeah. That's so sad. It is sad. Well, congratulations. You've been. You keep getting better and better. You were great before, and I just had so much fun watching it. Well, thank you. You're very funny. Well, thank you. And I know we're doing a show tomorrow together, so I'm pumped about that.

Yeah, that's right. We're doing a show at the Largo. Yeah, I'm pumped about that. It's a big show and I keep forgetting about. I'm happy that you're on it. It was offered to me, and it was, they said it was something to do with the Dodgers, and I thought it would be at the stadium. So I said no.

I was like, that sounds terrible. I don't want to do that. They go, oh, it's in a theater. And I go, oh, okay, that'll be fun. Have you performed it, Largo? No. Oh, you're going to love it. Okay.

It's such a great room. All right. I'm excited. Yeah, it'll be fun. Thanks for doing this. Thank you for having. We got it, kids. Lazangue surgelley,

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