Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Episode 14 : Leaving Tallon-Land

Episode Date: March 12, 2019

Special Guest Matthew Tallon appears to talk about Michael Jackson.

Choo-choo! Hoping board the podcast train. We're about to go to the laughter camps. Welcome to Brian and James Fuckie Jutter. I'm Brian O'Toole with James Kedin and special guest Matthew, the Italian-Stallion Telling. Woo! Woo, roo, roo.

I just want to let everyone know that before we start recording, Brian said, don't worry, I've got a good idea of how to start. And that's what it was. So, uh... He was so confident. It was very well. That's fun. say what it's very fun i practice it on the drive-up did you yeah i practiced the podcasters the people

listening can't see this but i did the you know the chew you did yeah i did the like pull it push the my hand movement of me pulled a little thing that goes chew chew uh and yeah well it's good well how did you like it matthew i think it was a well started podcast yeah yeah yeah start every podcast with that he doesn't usually never usually this animated your presence is obviously having quite an effect on that's good it's good like to have an extra in the room because then like if I can't think of anything just cut it that's my role yeah yeah we throw it over to Matthew when things get quiet yeah so Matthew thank you're being here you're literally the only reason we still do this podcast yes you're our

number one fan yeah I am I was I was very worried about that like fucking up your guys's dynamic oh impossible we don't have a dynamic really so such a lack of dynamic like yeah like it does really like it's very bad blood between us as well like oh yeah yeah If someone just in between those, just in case all kicks off. It's good. If it fucks up, though, I can go home

and complain about me being on the podcast online in the comments section and stuff. So that'll be, I'll be in general. I hope you do, because any kind of interest at all. The fact that anyone leaves a comment is just amazing,

that that would be wonderful. Like, I'm not joking. Like, we recorded four episodes this. Yes. And nothing happens. I know you're supposed to, like, record a podcast. Like, I know,

I wasn't expecting, like, a HBO show straight away. Like, you know, too dope queen. no who are they they're two they're two dope they're two women like uh they're having a podcast

and got popular another HBO show I wasn't expecting that after four episodes no well I was expecting at least more than 10 lights yeah maybe maybe like a see-so special while it was still going or someone to share I'd take a see-so special now

did nobody say yeah was I the first you're the 41st person real life and he can be any kind of compliment it ever yeah regarding the podcast or not I don't think you understand. I was ready, okay? I had, you know, in cartoons,

at the rock tide to the roll. I was standing at the bridge and there's people driving by saying, do it. And then you said something nice and I was like, James, we're going back into the studio. Yeah. So, no, thanks for listening, Matthew,

and now thank you, you're being a part of it. This is your chance to shine. Yeah, this is my big shot. I feel like I spent the entire time looking at the little audio waves coming. I can realize I should probably That's a little trick there. Don't look at the auto waves.

It'll just confuse. That's my voice in computer language. Yeah, this is my big break. So tell you the listeners, who are you? Who are you? Yes. Oh, fuck, I should have prepared this. No, don't.

Freestyle. Freestyle, baby. Matthew Tallinn. I'm a comedian. I do comedy with Brian and James. Yes. And we're part of the Dublin burgeoning circuit. Correct.

Correct. The up-and-comers. how long you've been doing it actually matthew like a year and a half yeah it's disgusting no no that's cool how long are you doing more than a year and a half

yeah yeah yeah well you're fair play I'm not jealous he hasn't stopped staring at him just direct eye contact yeah yeah I opened the door to Matthew in a robe I don't know

I left for a while and then I've come back and where were you like I was living in Chicago Oh, that's deadly I'm going to Boston I'm doing a J-1 Yeah

I have an interview Did you have to do an interview With the J-1 people No, I did one I did one But I went to the embassy Yeah And I was really scary

Because in the line ahead of you It was all people Who had like Been to Iraq Or Syria and stuff And they were like Grilling them For 10 minutes

So then they're just like Oh you're Irish Yeah It was very very racist Like we're not like We know how it is Like we're the white skin color Well you know

that may have been once upon a time but now, because of this latest development, this Irish girl. A girl from Dundalk. Matthew, you've heard of it. I have not heard about this. I've checked this out. A girl from Dundalk joined Isis. And you might know that the full story. She was a fucking airline play with it, okay, and just

pictures of her with Bertie. Is that right? Yeah. Oh my God. Buddy or her? Yeah. Just we thought Bertie couldn't get more crooked, okay. Now he's got links to Syria. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like... So this girl, Dundalk girl, okay. Dundalk girl. Oh, he on.

Oh, here now, oh, it's famous warm out here, hey. Do I have to wear this burq at the whole time, do I? Well, sure you law bring death to Western civilization. Yeah, she's joined. She's going to fuck it up for all the Irish people now. Because now they're going to think they wear a whole. Yeah, yeah. Well, here's the thing now, because last few episodes we were talking with the,

there's an English girl who joined ISIS and she wanted to get back. Oh, yeah, that's what I thought you were talking about. This is a separate one. This is a separate one. The English girl, she's still, and the baby died. She had a baby It died I was just thinking

I'm sure there's a lot of People in the British media We saw it and I'm like Oh it's a shame that we can get to A lot of daily mail raiders Just like fucking good Oh yeah There's lots of people like proper celebrating

Chuck it in the Tens mate Yeah Horrible Well that's awful So what's Well then I assume now that the baby's dead They're like well that was your only leverage honey

so get the fuck out of here that's basically that's exactly what's seriously oh yeah see I could be in the British Parliament you know what I mean I look down on plebs

just like anybody else but now I think because English were so rough on that one the Irish government they're like well we kind of have to treat our one a little bit better

oh okay they're gonna bring probably going to let her back in and put her in house of rest or something like that Irish government a little more sympathetic to terrorism oh political

so what now she's got a safe house you were going to there back in I think but he's so weird that like I could I live in Dundalk okay so I could like be walking around you can run into her yeah I could walk around Tesco and meet her do you think you recognise it?

I'd bring on to the show that would really upstage me as a guest yeah if it was like if it was an Isis it was like we got two special guests we got a woman who used to be in ISIS

and has literally killed people and Matthew who's been to Chicago yeah let's uh You know, credit, credit's true. There's no contest during England. How much Chicago, actually?

It's kind of, like, well-known for having a great comedy scene. Did you do many gigs over there? A lot of gang violence. Yeah, comedy and gang violence. It's improv and gang violence. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes at the same time, it's very good. Give me a job.

Give me your money. Yes, and here is my money. Yeah. I did a lot of gigs. It was pretty, I was like, I loved it. but I was stressed out all the time because the gigs are all over the city and I live like

like fucking nowhere like a way down in the south side so you're like running around trying to get to as many gigs as possible how many gigs you're doing a night but like two a night that's cool yeah it was very cool sometimes you could try to do three

when I first moved there though I'd try to get like three or four into a night and I'd miss like all of them and just like go around the entire city yeah you end up just tired yourself yeah oh Jesus just curl into a ball in the street I've done that And that's how people become homeless

That's what happened To many of the homeless people In Chicago Failed comedians I tried to make it In the second city But I missed the train Spare a dollar, sir

He doesn't know what heard is Mr. Farr Are he still in S&L He owes to be 20 quid For a bag So how do you find the audiences Then like Is there a huge difference

Between like American audiences And Irish audiences uh yeah the american audiences give more of a shit that you're there so they actually like they kind of like care a little bit I mean like you still get hecklers and shit but if you go to like if you go to like the bigger clubs and stuff like the laugh factory and everything when everybody's

out for like their night they kind of treat it more like a theater thing or something where they're like looking up at you instead of like if you do a big club in Dublin they're kind of like yeah oh yeah you don't do his club in Dublin it literally is this the people there are basically like bags of dog shit with people's faces

like they're not like you know just kind of scum yeah and our job was to just dance for the scum yes yes that's really yeah that's why I say I'm getting on stage like hey scum you want to see me dance do you and I just take off my shirt

yeah and you usually have something written on your stomach yeah speaking of which nice little segue Brian you did a roast battle I did a roast battle how was the roast battle it was good James Reffson I did a roast battle with Brian Geller and I wrote I had a joke or I

I said something I wrote roasted on my stomach a bit like prop comedy Yeah using yourself as a prop My body is a tool But I spelled roasted wrong That was only honestly unintentional That's just because of show like

Even when I make mistakes it works In the overall picture So you wrote it, I would have figured You got someone to write it on you Who would I get to write on my stone? You know a lot of weird people I think you could definitely find someone That was a pretty well written

Yeah Yeah Catheraphyrophy was pretty great Yeah, I, I, because I have to write, it's, you know yourself when you're writing on yourself. No. Yeah, many times. Yeah, yeah, yeah, when you're writing on yourself, like, you have to do it like backwards. Yeah.

Yeah, so you have to, try doing it an S, listeners, do an S backwards right now, you know what I mean. Okay, it's hard when you think. I'm dyslexic. Yeah, yeah, that's true. You are dyslexic. Yeah, yeah. It's something I struggle with every day. Well, you didn't let it, I mean, nobody really noticed because it was very quick.

You lifted the shirt. Yeah, yeah. You got the applause. It was nobody noticed. Yeah, yeah. There's a fun roast. Your arm as well. I actually

Yeah, I'll say it Like, I actually A swat sticker on my, on my leg A what? Did you say a swastika or a swat sticker? You said swat sticker, what is that? What's a swat sticker? What's a swat sticker, how do you pronounce it?

Swastika? Swat sticker. Swat sticker. Swat sticker. I don't know, I'm dyslexic. I did a swat sticker, a Nazi symbol on my leg Yes, for clarification.

Yeah, yeah, on one leg and then the word roast on my other leg. I thought it used that later on the roast, but I was like I didn't need it Were you gonna pull that in your pants? No I was just gonna

That's when I lost the roast battle I just I just presented myself to Gallagher Like The wordy man is won Now you all know where this was Now you may insert me And then he just puts it in

And Jim Elliot and You know Colin and Martin Agolo They give their commentary They all watch your spittles throwing money As As they fuck That's really how we should end No, no, notorious.

Oh, yeah. It's kind of like, you know that fetish, Vore? No, what is that? Vore is this fetish where it's all about being eaten by someone, just being consumed. Oh, oh. And you've seen Brian Geller, he's way bigger than me, so he could just like, just, yeah, so you look up video. We look up videos after this. I don't want to.

And listeners, after you've done that backwards S, look up this. Yeah, so it's all these pictures of guys, like, you know, being swallowed up by, like, a big woman. And this guy's smiling because he's so, like. So actually being like, how does she fit them? It's not real. Oh, it's like animated. It's animated or really badly drawn on like MSPs. Where it's like, yeah, no, you didn't specify.

And I just got my, I went to a very weird place. I was like, the logistics alone. How would you start with the feet and then just kind of like a snake. Yeah. Like real deep throat and like gag reflex. Yeah, but it's hard to actually eat someone. It is. It is.

Brian, what are we talking about? So the roast battle. So that's why I was thinking of when Brian was roasting me. Well, you were thinking of four. Yeah. It's a porn. It's a type of porn. Yeah, that's why I lost because I was too distracted.

Brian has some great jokes. The best joke, see, I love being roasted. Brian said I looked like every member, every cast member of Trainspot. Yeah, yeah. Especially a dead baby. That was a great joke.

See, I love being roasted. Like, my favorite thing after roast is to go back to my friends and tell them the jokes he told them. than me. Yeah, yeah. I like that. And so how did you find then just like the process of writing jokes? Is that something that you?

It's hard. Like, Brian's such a nice guy. Yes, that's true. I don't like even winning roast battles. Like, I won a roast battle in Edinburgh against this guy.

And I felt, I actually apologized him afterwards because I felt bad about him. Oh, wow. Yeah, I was just like, oh, because he was just like a bit floundering. I felt like too powerful. Oh, I see.

You know me. I'm not used to feeling powerful. I've done one roast battle. I'm just to reiterate what you said. It is hard to like, sit down. It's like, okay, here's my subject. And this guy I didn't really know too well, Chris McShane.

I know him now. And again, he's a really nice guy. And in fairness, he, I can't, I think he won the roast battle, but it was fairly even handed the whole way through. But it is hard to just sit down, just like, what can I write about this person? I don't know, like, you know? Yeah, I'm not like, I'm either too nice or too mean, you know? Yeah.

It's hard to go, it's hard to go funny mean. Because the day after the roast, I just kept on thinking of roast jokes about random comedians that I knew. Oh, because you got all fired up from no. Yeah, I got all. It was so it was exciting. See, a lot of roast jokes I think about comedians, I'm not allowed to say it. They are career enders.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yours or theirs? Oh, yeah. Obviously, mine, like, what, fuck. We're both blessed with an incredible ability to write jokes that we could never tell anyone. We're going to stop recording this. We're going to tell you something. It's about, be it.

He didn't like it. Yeah, yeah. No sense of humor. So you'd be up for roasting, would you? Yeah, I'd love to do a roast. I feel like I come across as like kind of awkward and friendly. I'd love to just go up and like eviscerate. Yeah, you'd be like kind of like you'd fool them and then you stab a knife in there.

Yes, exactly. Black flag. Black flag. A lot of prison shank. Yeah, yeah. To the toothbrush that you carved. Yeah, yeah. And then the judges are like, well, you're not supposed to stab them.

As I was saying, I'm doing J1. I'm a bit paranoid about stuff that I say in the podcast might affect my chance to get in the country. You think the NSA are going to be listening to... I'm just saying, you haven't even heard my opinions in Israel yet. I'm waiting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, do you want to get into this right now? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Just give me a quick, yay or nay for Israel. It's more complicated than that. I'm going to say nay and then not yet, what? Flip a coin. Ney employees, I want Israel to strive. And yay just means, like, what, I support everything they do in all history. Yeah. You're putting me in a weird spot here.

Well, you brought it up. Just some Zionists listen to this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Eurovision's being held in Israel. That's right. And an Irish woman is going to be the, on Israel side. Is that right?

Sarah McTiernan, I think her name is. And how did she come to be representing Israel? I don't know. She came to her in the vice of Ireland in 2015. And so natural next step. She disappeared for a while

and then she showed up in Israel and now she's singing a song called 22. Maybe it's like the Dundalk lady leaving and joining ISIS. Yeah, yeah. They teamed up and picked sides. Maybe those two are going to start a super group together. That, no, no, no, no.

That would be a good sitcom. That's a moneymaker right there. You know, Ebony and Ivory? Yes. Israel and ISIS. Where's the original odd couple? You need the toilet seat down. You kill Palestinians.

So yeah, it's a lot of controversy about this. People are saying you should bicar up Eurovision now because Israel's about, they say because they're trying to show a bright and sunny side to Israel. And another big thing is a lot of soldiers will be watching this. There would be a lot of free tickets. for soldiers to watch this girl before. So it's big thing, like, and again, there's no simple thing like Israel, like, it's like...

Very complex, yes. It's a complex issue. Well, they're acting like dicks, but also, you know, you're the gay fellow for Mrs. Brown's boys. Yeah. He likes Israel. Does he?

Yeah. Okay, that's good to know. Yeah. I wonder if they're going to work that into the next season of Mrs. Brown's boys. Well, he left. He left. Yeah.

Oh, does Mr. Brown boys still exist? Oh, yeah. Of course. This is why you're not. That's why you're not. That's why you're going to succeed. it's going from strength to strength it kind of feels like

it's coming to the end though like really no you think a hundred percent no gosh she's got a chat show she's got a sitcom and probably another movie coming out animated series

is she not like is the character VR experience not kind of offensive to trans people how do trans people feel about Mrs. Barnes boys I don't know the fact of Brendan O'Carrow why are you asking fucking Matthew

I'm not I was opening it up to like a general like has there been any No, well she's not in any way I know, but it's just like a very old comedy trope of like Man dress as a woman Ah, but it's not like she's playing a transgender person No, no Irish mammy

Yeah, Irish mammies are like, you know Irish mammy Irish mammy, always crying on Christmas Day. They're mental, aren't Yeah, they are mental Very mental So, yeah, Mrs Brown's going from strength to strength Well, that's good to know Speaking of transsexual, I went to the George

Actually, I'm meant to say transsexuals transgendered. We've gotten in trouble for that. I did, yeah. I'm from Cardle. I'm so dumb. I'm trying my best. I, how many men do, how many, who do I have to shift to prove that I'm progressively?

I'll shift them all, okay? I'll take video of it, okay? I'll get my knees. Yeah. Yeah, transgender. Stick that on your J-1. Yeah. I will, I will go down on Caitlin Jenner if you let me into the country. Yeah. All right. So, speaking, what were we talking? I was just saying I went to the George

and it's a lovely, cool thing. I went to the George. I went to the George once before but it was during the day I kind of went in because I was a bit lost What's the George like during the day? Just like no man's book No man

Do they not realize? They're watching the footy But then like When the sun goes down They all sort of transform Like a werewolf You know Like Triller

Which we'll get to that Oh we'll get to that Oh shit By the way We're going to get to Triller there on Where's the Pino Char It's like too out the window Oh yeah

Because I can't afford it anymore I'm already in dead Yeah, okay. We'll stick to the George and we'll get one to Michael Jackson. Okay. So I went to the George after the roast. I met these two people and they brought me to the George. Really enjoyed it.

Yeah. Yeah. I actually take back, you know, we like... All the homophobic things I've said. Because I, in the past I've been slightly dismissive of the whole drag race kind of thing. Yeah. A bit like it's like, oh, it's not... But then I see it in there, it's like, oh, it's actually an expression of like, you know,

they're having the crack and stuff like. Well, I'm sort of of the opinion, and most, you know, an artist would agree that to earn your place on the stage, you have to kind of suffer for the stage. And I think they definitely qualify for that. They've faced a lot of persecution. They deserve to be up there. It's like, it's like slingblade. It's not like slingblade in any way, but, uh... No, it is.

But they didn't like sling blades. Who didn't? People, like... Did you go around the George asking? So, Slingblade! That Billy Bob Thornton, huh? No, it is, because, like, didn't like him at first. Is that right?

And then, you know, because they didn't trust him And then he befriended that kid And then he killed the lad I haven't seen him He went back to prison Okay Who is sling blaze? Oh, it's Billy Bob Thornton plays a mental patient

And he kills his mother Oh, okay With a sling blade Yeah But then, because it's like But then they all forgive him Yeah That's kind of a sweet redemption story

Yeah Because he like he's not mentally there So he didn't know exactly what he was doing So he killed his mother And the guy who was fucking his mother Yeah And then the guy from A Simple Rules is in it. John Ritter?

Yeah, John Ritter, yeah. Oh, he's his thing thing. Yeah, John Ritter, yeah. He had a heart attack in real life. And he's like a family. He was like on a sitcom for a. Yeah, yeah. And they continued, he was the main character

and they continued the sitcom after they died. Like, they just, like the episode started. They just came in. It's like, well, we just came back from dad's funeral. Oh, boy. It's like they're doing Roseanne now, aren't they without Rosan? Are they doing Rosal without Rosan? Yeah.

Oh, wow. That's gonna bomb, like... No, it did well. It was no... Yeah, I think it was number one in the ratings. They got John Goodman on it. Well, John Good. I like John Goodman.

He's great, yeah. Yeah, this is called the Connors, and it's just... I think it's like that, like, Roseanne, like... Is it still? Well, we just buried Rosanne. It was a big grave. You know, they kept all the Trump shit from her, like, from her influence? No, they definitely got rid of all that stuff, yeah.

God, that was very unfortunate, but, like, she is sort of has been exhibiting symptoms of kind of just losing touch with. with, like, reality. But that's a bit like drags. We'll bring it back to that. Like, everyone treats her badly, but there's a good soul deep down. Yeah, I believe that. It's kind of like people do drag.

Sure, yes. You shouldn't judge them just because of what did you say. I used to go to the George quite a lot, actually, when I was younger. I'm going again? Yeah, dude. I used to go there because I was, like, my best friend from school, he actually came out to me when he was 15. I was the first person he came out to it.

So when he, like, living in Monum, though, you couldn't exactly be two out of the closet because it's still a very backward place and it definitely was like 10, 15 years ago. So when he moved to Dublin, he started going to the Georgia lot because he could be himself. I used to go with him and used to like do pills in MD

and just have a darn good time. I want to do pills there. Dance the night away. Any listeners? Private message me and we'll go to the Georgia do pills together. Yes. But like it's just so fun there

because like I went during Ragweek, okay? It was rag week back in Dundalk where I was okay. And that's another reason why we should let that girl back in the country because she's missing out of Rageway and Donnell. That's probably she's devastating.

Oh, she's like, come on. Oh, here on. I want to get back into Brubakers. I'm sorry, right? Imperialism's grand. I don't mind it. The oligarchies command. Just let me in for a pint.

So, like, I was going out in Dundalk tonight before, and it's just fucking all normal people, okay? Yeah. I'm so sick of fucking. Turn your stomach. Yeah. Yeah, I know. It's just all people, like, and they're all just kind of like, a little bit back. No, no on against it.

They're all a little bit backwards. And also, they all know I'm a comedian now. So all trying to tell me jokes. Yeah. And the joke is, Joe Trottererer is, here, here, Brian, what'd you call it, China man? Shouldn't you just be teaching the class, sir? I mean, I won't say what he calls them,

are you thinking guess? So, like, it's that level, it's like, you know, just a lot, just like, people, it's hard to talk there, just not on my level, and then I go to George, and just feel so open and comfortable. I wish I was fully gay, just to enjoy the, that's why I probably going to take some pills there to help me, to help me in my journey.

Just go for it. I'm actually gay, thank you. very much and if you just flank me off with a glove and we'll just call it quits. A white glove. A white satin globe. I've never been. You guys are really selling it. Oh, it's good fun. Yeah, like we should do like a sequel episode

where we all take pills of the George. Live from the George. Well, importantly, like it's a fucking like a war correspondence. There's anarchy anywhere. The glitter has just exploded. I'm not sure if you can see that. It's bloody everywhere all over my clothes.

Oh, dear Lord. The humanity. And, oh, my days. Back to you, Walter. Absolutely. It's disgraceful behavior. Yeah. Yeah. So the George, yeah, good fun.

That's fun. We've organized that now. Big night out of the George. Yeah. So, yeah, I'm just saying, like, I understand Rupal's drag race now. Okay. I've never seen that either. I've never actually watched an episode either.

Don't bother. I tried to write a joke about it, but it just never got a good reception, so I just kind of let it die. Well, some people love it so much. Yeah. I always, like, they're doing nothing like that but then uh now i see it like it's like they're getting joy out of it and just because i don't

understand it was their drag show going on yeah yeah that's what i mean it's good yeah and it's it's all shapes inside so it's like flab going all over the place and like you know and it's fucking class and they're not trying that something they're even trying to look good no some really she's like just pulling their underwear up and it's like you just see fucking whatever you want to see like

a bit of fucking you know stretch mark you know like that Kendrick Lamar song show me those stretch marks bitch that's what I think you need to see it live to get the full stretch mark vibe out of it which I like I like that it's almost a bit too pretty on Rupol's drag race

bit too unreal like some of them look like anime characters yeah they're very heavy with the makeup and a lot of colours and again if they want to do that yeah of course it's fine

it's just like it's not my thing I thought a dumb joke uh Rupol's Formula 1 drag race I'm not going to do anything with oh well just saying

I'm just going to go see that walk off here guys and I was like guys Formula one Have you ever crossed dressed? Please take me away like Lenny Bruce

You've got to cross-suck-ha Have you ever cross-dressed? What have it done now? On Halloween I dressed like a woman But that wasn't like proper I wish I hadn't gone full lipstick And all that I would like to I've worn women's underwear a lot

I've worn women's like what do you call them Garters or the clips Oh really? Yeah I've worn them and strutted around the Crown Plaza I've found a few different things like I've never gone to the full like you know

I would like to do it once just proper like what's the non-offensive word drag drag yeah yeah yeah I want to go with that yeah yeah I want to go full glitter tart like

glitter tart yeah just like just like just like this proper you know in RuPaul's drag place the term called cunts where it's like confidence understanding

cunts nutrition and togetherness or something like that. So it sounds like they were really struggling just to get any words. It's like car, umbrella, Niagara Falls. Oh wait, that's two words, never mind.

Well, obviously, it's just a play you can say like, oh, cunt. Yeah, it's like a fun thing. And then, you know, that's like, that's what I want. Just to be able to say cunt freely. Yeah, yeah. I cross-dress once.

I went to the gale talk when I was like 15. I had a cross-dressing Kaley, which was something that was very of its time. I'm not sure you'd get away with a cross dressing came That's what they called it I'm surprised that we don't talk We're okay with that

Yeah yeah It's surprisingly Progressive for the gay Actually yeah it was Yeah so I'd dress up like a woman Not a particularly attractive woman But a woman nonetheless And yeah it was fine

It was just okay Not really I know I was a little uncommon I refuse to smile Because then they win I'm not happy about this But I'm doing this Because I love the Irish language

we need to save it they have like an interview with me on TG Carr dressed as a woman Gunas a Tartu it's August transgender What's a madra couple I don't know any Irish What's that dog horse

Dog horse? Dog horse, I think that's what you say I sometimes say Madra couple When I'm with people who speak Irish Just so I am I can never think of Irish Like if somebody says

speak in Irish I can't do it but if somebody's I could understand those words that you just said you know what I'm just I'm still I'm saying the stuff I learned in primary school yeah I'm not using it into any kind of language I can remember all the rules like like shavu and uru and stuff

oh you're no that's wet I know what to that sounds like French I wasn't taught Irish in secondary because I was dyslexic so we were I was put with this such a weird system they have I don't know if it's still like this so you're just put in a shed dyslexic kids basically yeah the dyslexic kids are putting a separate

room in case we infect the other one. We don't know how it's we can't take the trash. It's like that film contagious. You just come in in a hazmat We're going to kill patient zero. So like they put us, all right, with like

the severely autistic children and then the kids who were getting fights all the time. That's a very volatile mix of kids right there. Stick us in the room and then like here, look, we're going to go learn the language that was stolen from us by English. You can just, I know, draw on the table or anything.

Just memorize this bus timetable. No, I'm one of the dyslexics. Oh, sorry. I don't know. I don't know what's trying to write your name. So they leave us like that and then fucking hell would kick off. Jesus. No supervision or?

Oh, one woman doesn't care anymore. I study for 30 years and they stick me here with this band of freaks. Oh, yeah, one woman who just goes out to her car now and again and comes back dizzy. She just brings her around. rag and a hose. I'll be back, baby, a half an hour. We'll see. You kids got you lean.

I want those eddies. So, yeah, do you speak Irish much? No, never. You're going to drag? Have you gone to an Irish Cayley? At the same time, an Irish drag night. And no, I've never been to, I've never gone drag. Again. It's on the bucket list, baby.

Again, like, we go, I'll put you in trying. Yeah, we'll take you under our deviant week. We will, much like Jackson and Neverland, do you? Well, we've got to talk about that because I know literally just last week we said we're not going to talk about Pitos anymore, but literally everybody is going mental. Everyone's talking with this. It's crazy. You guys were trailblazers. Well, we were talking about this back in the 90s.

Have you guys seen it then? Have you seen leaving everywhere? Yeah. I haven't watched the full part of the second. Personally, I don't think it needed. a full two, like four hours you could have done it and like two and a half. I watched three hours and I was like I need a break. It's so grim

like the details they go into is just so it's really disturbing like a genuinely felt sick watching it. Jackson's such like a contradiction because like I always taught because the only way he has really innocent vibe. So I always talk he's like a Lenny from of mice and men where he doesn't

where he he is to he does the children what Lenny does the rabbits. Okay. Like accidentally. No, I just wanted to fuck him George. I didn't know what I was doing. Like, I just thought you, like, an instant, like, yeah.

Guy who's, like, he's just so mentally fucked by his dad. Yeah, yeah. He taught, like, he was, like, you know, having an actual relationship to these children, didn't think anything wrong. But watching this, I was surprised by how much of an actual predator he was and how smart. Incredibly calculated. Yeah, yeah.

He actually knew, he knew which kids to go for. He knew not to go for Culkin, because Colkin is... He's a star, yeah, yeah, yeah. He knew to go for the fucking little Australia. What was it? It's a... Jorriene Robson? It's something robson.

Dave Robson. Johnny Safefuck? What's his name? Johnny Safefuck. That's what he changed his name to when he started. James Safechuk. Yeah, Safechuck. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, it makes more sense. Well, if the name like that, you really are asking for it, aren't you? Safe fuck. That was Jackson. Oh, Safe fuck. Yeah, yeah. But, like, so now it's like, it's really, really is kind of like, it's just, after watching that four hours, I'm starting to say.

suspect he might be a kind of Is there something just not right about this guy? I don't know what it is. Really, like, even at best he was just a freaky weird old. You should not be having kids in your bed. Yes, that is just false stuff. It's amazing how normal the defense

makes it sound when it's already admitting that happened. Like, oh no, you just never sleeping the same bed. The parents, the parents were like, well, I'll let wide, uh, sleip in the bed with him. I didn't think anything was your own shoulder. There was a padlock on the door and their incredible loud, dance music

and they're screaming sometime. Oh, I just thought they were having fun. Oh, didn't want me, dropped. He was having the time of his life. She is a con. She is a con. I'll actually defend her. Oh, well, I agree.

I think, it's hard for us to think because we, like, I only know Jackson as a pedophile as from the jokes. Yeah, yeah. I distinctly members of kids have seen a picture of him being scared. Yeah. Because he was not a healthy-looking man.

No, he looks like a cool. Yeah, okay. like a proper i remember taking my ask my mother if that's real and she was like i don't know but yeah so like i but like to people back then he was the closest thing like an angel yeah okay he was like what the catholics hold the pope all right he was what his fans like i just yeah everyone thinks it's great we everybody left their kids with like priests and shit okay yeah that's a fair point you're right but that's not right either on the parents that did that are fucking shocked there's a void where he wants with just a flick of his finger he can change your

like here do you want 20 million dollars that's the thing though she was seduced by the whole hollywood lifestyle and she just had this cognitive dissonance as like i think that would be fair like they were like he was in their house every day for like two years okay yeah talking on the phone and it's like yeah yeah he just again incredibly calculated yeah yeah yeah he was also struck me as like how just like he really was just a little fucking selfish little kid really yeah of the mental totality of like that was like I always get what I want. That's like he said to the mother one stage when she wouldn't like let him like take

the kid for like a tour or something like that. Yeah yeah. And like, ugh, it's just not a fun document. I mean, it's really not fun. The other bit that really got me all right is there's a one little clip of it where to show Raphael from a teenage meeting to turtles okay. You know, they show a tie

of him and someone's put the hat over his face as if like to cover his eyes. Oh my God. And that really struck me like oh, that's... Oh, Raphael could still hear it, though. Oh, God. Like, it's so fucked up.

Do you guys, you guys may be too young to remember, but in 2003, a documentary came out called Living with Michael Jackson. Do you guys remember then? Now, that one, I mean, there were serious alarm bells from that one. Like, he spoke openly

about letting children sleep in his bed. Like, this is him, Michael himself, talking about it, and defending it. And he had, like, he completely denied that he ever had any plastic surgery on his face, which is absurd

like look at them you cannot deny but he was like no he just was adamant he just had a total disconnect from reality in regards to like every aspect of his life

and I would advise if you find Levin leaving Neverland be interested and go back and watch living with Michael Jackson because you're getting it straight from the

I probably will watch that I need a I'm trying to sell it that's it I need a little bit of a break for Michael Jackson though but like I will get to it sometimes

it's just too you need a bit This nor Kelly, I need a little break from pedophilia. Yeah. But like, oh my God. And now, it's interesting how the Jackson Estate are reacting to this. So the way, they've been tweeting nonstop, just like nice pictures of Michael, you know, dancing, smiling. Remember the moonwalk kids?

Yeah, things like that. And what they, their idea of counteracting the first part of documentary was they released on the Jackson official website, an unreleased footage from a concert that was the same length as the first part of the documentary. so in their head they're like that was their defense in their head people like people will be watching that dog commit to be like

oh that is pretty bad oh he's moon walking smooth pedophiles I'm bad I'm bad you know it so it is like is reputation tarnished forever well it seems like a lot of like

radio stations are saying we'll never play any Michael Jackson again I think it's definitely heard him like there is an impact like how long will it last I don't know Well, that system is being fucking, like, all those guys who want to say, we're now, we're no longer playing the music. Like, yeah, well, like, you knew beforehand.

Yeah, you're definitely. Now it's unpopular. And I guarantee in a few years to start playing him again. Yeah. If you, like, band every musician who was a rapist or pedophile, there'd be nothing. It would literally just be the crazy frog. And maybe the gorillas, because they're not real.

No, no. And that's, as opposed to frog, didn't he take his dick out? Yeah, he did. It's right. He always said his dick out. They've blurred it out. Much like Louis C.K. Louis C.K.

Yeah. Well, one other thing, though, they're actually doing a musical on Michael Jackson musical next year, and that's why the estate are really worried about this documentary. It's called Michael Jackson can't get enough. Oh, God.

It's a poor. All of his, like, music, like, the song titles are just, are just too easy to, like, bad, dangerous, smooth, criminal. There's going to be a terrible parody songs in the comedy world in the next couple of months. I'm working on them already

Smooth pedophile That was me working out We're just in the studio Smooth pedophile But that's the only difference I make And what's funny about You know the full three and a half Yeah that's a great thing with Charlie songs

Is when you know like What the change is in the first few seconds And then the rest song You're sitting there like oh yeah Enjoying the song Yeah Yeah Cool

Like a modern day weird owl Who you know Is he still around He's still relevant He is yeah He won't do fat anymore I guarantee you Is that right

Was fat? Oh, I, Edit. Eat it. No, you're fat as well. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. No, I was never a big weird old guy now, to be honest. Oh, well.

I'm missing out. You were more of a Jackson guy. Enough for his music. Interestingly enough, I didn't like his music until I saw the documentary, but it's grown on me. Very catchy. I felt really guilty, because honestly, smooth criminal was stuck in my head for, like, the entire rest of the day. Yeah.

Oh, damn good music. You can't, yeah. Oh, I could moonwalk. I'm just saying, he's not that special. Can you move on? like he's a proper fucking god. Yeah. And there's so many,

it's interested to the fans are so like, you know, strike me dead if Michael's a liar. He'd never, he was an innocent child. She was in a world did not understand him.

Yeah. Why did they care so? Did you get to the bit in the documentary where there's like that, that, like fat, like that with all of the posters in the back,

yeah, yeah. Oh yeah. Fuck you. And then this case gets thrown out and he just has this maniacal app. Yeah, really disturbed people. But like, getting into like the little sort of weird world of fandom you know oh my god especially back then

like it was like fucking princess diana died when he got accused of yeah throngs outside the courtroom i remember where i was when jackson died i was smoking a joint really hollywood lay wow where were you when jackson died this is a good topic i think i was in i think i was in primary school oh fuck you how old are you uh 20 oh for fuck sake i'm gonna i'm gonna get done for having you bedroom get out of here you wearing a wire it was so weird he wanted to sleep we're just friends all right he taught me how to masturbate

you're doing it wrong Matthew and I'm like the mother going like I don't see what's wrong that'd be great because I'm such a big fan of the podcast that the whole thing existed as an elaborate grooming process well we paid for

we got on iTunes we paid for the sound clouting just to get you here could just ask you read the podcast it was all worth it. Is there anything you ever wanted to ask us, Matthew, from, I'll tell you what, give us a perspective of the, of the listener.

When you listen to our podcast, what things go through your mind? How do we come across? You're the voice of the listener. This is very madden because I'm going to be listening to this later on. Well, it'll probably take James for four days to put up. Oh, fuck you.

What did you? Edited is that, you lazy con. They can. I fucking recorded my laptop, my gaff. You'll come in with your little notebook. Oh, I'm not going to tell you what we're talking about until we're recording. A little fucking apple polishing, son of a bitch. Yeah, I feel like... You'll fuck yourself.

Fuck you. I was told not to prepare anything. Yeah. Every week, he comes in with notes, and he's always like, reads his notes. And he's like, giving me shit. Sorry to do my sort of preparing, like. I prepare if you let me. But you won't.

It's a big power move. We're moving on. I started listening to the podcast, my... that I was in Chicago for like a month and a bit and I was staying in this shitty like run down like frat house okay it was kind of miserable so I started listening to the podcast

Frat house? Yeah I was living in a fraternity house oh what because I didn't realize I bet there's a lot of bad vibes in there yeah it was it was a little bit all because they were literally like above me and they like parties every night or all these like drunk freshman

oh I'd love to be there Jesus I think they really like my style I think they they like They liked me and everything But every one of them I was like Oh shit Is this guy like a molester or something

It was very like Yeah Because that's like the vision of them I think you like my style To reiterate Yeah But no yeah I got kind of

I was hooked It was like When you did that episode Where Where you guys talked about You This is weird But when you talked about

Sucking off that guy For money I was like This is a great No, wait a minute. Defamation! I don't, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'll sue you. I did not suck him off.

He just slated me a bit. Oh, okay. I didn't suck him off, like, yeah, I feel like that's the Maron, C.K. I could barely even get hard to put it in his ass because, uh, I just, I'm just not in the right news. Because you're a real man, that's why. Yeah, yeah.

Well, I think it's important to, like, see how far you can push your sexuality. Of course. No, yeah. Yeah, so, like, me trying to put, and he's, he's kind of dirty, he wasn't even proper white. Dirty asshole? He did, yeah. It just fits of shit in his hair in the... Dingleberries.

Yeah, and I used to try and put my soft cock in it. And it didn't really work, like. But at least, you know, it swings around about. At least Matthew heard it, like, years later. It honestly made for a great episode of podcast. I'm glad. I'm glad. Some hot bits.

Yeah. Ooh, hot bit. Yeah, we'll like release Too Hot for GV. Ryan and James fuck each other. Ooh. I don't know why they're Where that would come for That's my seven

It's such a niche Um El Diablo So yeah We got you hooked in All right And you've listened since Have you spread the word

I got my brother To listen to it Because when you guys told me That was the only person Who told you anything good I started to think I was crazy Yeah And like

They're talking to me Through the podcast The government You give you to your brother You're like There's no That means I thought it was going to be like a beautiful mind

and talking and have all these these Brian and James murals in my room There is no Brian But he said that he really liked it as well Oh good Your brother likes it as well Connor yeah Yeah we're a family plot

Just goes to show how disturbed all of our families are Yeah my mom was asking to listen to this And I think Oh God Oh God If my mother ever listened to this She would beat me silly And she could do it

She's only on twice her size She'd still batter me She'd go for the eyes. Oh, she was. Like a fucking chimp. The shims. The eyes and the balls. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Rup your face off. I don't ever want my mother to hear any of this. Then you'd be on Oprah. What are we talking about? Oh, yeah. Has your home seen your act? No. No, she came once, and I bombed terrifically,

and that was the only time she ever came to see me. Like, I didn't even kind of know she was coming. My, like, it was in Monaghan and some relatives dragged her along. Horrible experience. I never want to replicate it. It was for Charlie for Down syndrome. Yeah. I got paid

He didn't This might be like a shitty thing to say But I'm not sure if you can If comedy is the right thing to do a charity gig Definitely not It depends on the charity And it depends on the charity and it depends on the type of comedy Featured on the night

And my comedy definitely does not go well With charity If the audience should I don't know But it was all old people You were there I got I tried my fucking best You actually did pretty good

I got a lot of ooze, though. I got silence the whole time. By respected you more afterwards. It's like that real comic. That's a real comic right there. I don't think my mother would appreciate some of my jokes, especially a specific one. I'm sure you all know which one I'm being.

Which I know what you're talking about, that joke, which I got positive feedback about that joke. Yeah, I have as well, actually. That's the main joke that people are like. Yeah. It's like right at the beginning as well. you do something come right at the gate that's good to start off like that start your strongest

bit yeah yeah I'm sure somewhere there's a table of higher-ups talking about you oh really oh I certainly hope so there's a lot of heat around around James oh guys come on now stuff that's two you're too kind of build them up and break them down I have no idea

how to capitalize it I'm such kind of a I'm very like naive about the industry and how it works I mean I kind of because I won that next top comic thing I was even saying to Matthew before we were recording. I don't know how how do I like phrase it to clubs without sounding like a douche. Don't worry

about something. Hello, this is James Cadden Dublin's next top comic and demand a spot. Yeah, do it, yeah. Really? Just send him a picture your trophy and then April 15th question. And a gun. Yeah, so... And your dick. Really just confused. The trifecta.

The idea of I won't say names. The idea of a certain promoter in Dublin getting those three message, you're going, what the fuck? Hey! Oh, this is the guy. This is the guy.

He wants a spot. Get all the spots he wants. I love it. I love it. What about you? Have either of your guys' mother's senior act? My dad saw me like a gimmick-y, I shouldn't say, but a gimmick show in Chicago where the gimmick was that, like, if people can throw tomatoes at you, if they don't like.

your jokes. Are you serious? John's plan told me about this. Yeah, John's plan apparently did it and came up and was like, I'm allergic to tomatoes. And everyone just started counting him. Nice. But yeah, that was horrible. It's because he was visiting me for like three days and I had that book. So I was like, I can't just abandon it. But it was, it was painful. They did not like me. Did you get a lot of tomatoes? Yeah, because my bits sometimes they hate like five seconds and not knowing what's going on so I went up and started doing my fucking

impressions of the wind and shit and just CEO they were not up for that that's a really it sounds like a lot of fun though it was really fun the second time I did it when you like know that to be playful with the vibe and not just do your act

yeah yeah I suppose it really sticks out in short time of school and immediately do your act like and I acknowledge the fact that they're all holding to be able It's just like don't address it at all. Yeah, it's kind of pathetic because you just start delivering them worse and everything because you get, your timing is interrupted by tomatoes in the face. What about you, Brian?

Any, uh, your mom ever come to your gigs? No, my parents think I'm dead. Well, they'd like to believe that. Yeah. You were talking about using the award to help your career. Yes. Which I think you need to get rid of the whole idea of like looking like a dude. She's got to push your weight around.

I thought you were going to say, get rid of the idea of having a career. It'll never happen. Well, I remember actually, this is a new thing. story from last week. I don't know if you heard about this. There was some comedy reviewer in England and he got caught sending messages, inappropriate messages

of comics going like, hey, I'll give you an extra star if you send me a dick pick. Are you serious? Yeah. Wow. It just goes to show like how hard it is for women in the comedy scene.

Oh my God. They don't have a dick. No, that again. What can they do? Yeah. Click pick? Is that a thing? No, no.

No, no, he wouldn't accept that. No. It's funny. I thought it funny if, like, far two picks a live. I thought it's funny if, like, he would review me and I sent him a dickpick

and actually lost his star So anything else We should ask Matthew while he's here Oh yeah We should actually ask you more questions Yeah yeah I'm expecting an interview Yeah yeah

We'll do another one else Top of fucking Michael Jackson Yeah yeah Fuck him King of Pop I'm the fucking king of the Dublin Under 21's comedy Yeah yeah I would say that

I don't know No no Ashmore I laugh at Ashmore Aschmore's rubbing your balls in your face. It's like all that even shit. It's taken over to the world. Now I'm out in the cold.

The industry doesn't care about me anymore. You're going to become bitter. I'm far more bitter than I should be for my age. I feel like I've lost my shot already. You've become openly and bitter. We end up recording the podcast with us. Yes, this is the final nail. Well, I'm hoping, though, that having you on

will give us a bit of fucking leverage now. Maybe people listen to it. You guys, you picked the word. You guys really should have picked a guest that has fans and friends. friends. Like, you're going to get six extra listeners. Well, this is, this is a tester one. Then we'll get someone cool, like Jesse James. You don't have a six pack. I'm not from Canada.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, uh, yesterday was International Women's Day. Yeah, what did you do for that? Uh, I was on a comedy gold in the... Oh, what was that? I actually, like, this sounds dumb now. When did International Women's Day become a thing, like? Because obviously wasn't around, like, when Jesus was born? Probably not.

No. Probably not. When did it? I could just Google. I don't want to Google, actually. Oh, look it up. Yeah, well, look it. took it up but what do you do on here for comedy gold uh i don't think that it wasn't like a special international women's day comedy gold thing just a regular something like uh there was like yeah

it was like a mixed lineup yeah but uh that's a nice room i would say that's probably comedy gold is probably like um the closest to sort of like an alt club that we have if you know what i mean yeah i mean there's the crash comedy monthly one that's true uh surrealist comedians no one wants me to do crash comedy my stuff is a little too surreal oh i mean i Also racist. We don't like your Biggie Smalls in person. What would happen if Biggie Smalls met D.W. Griffith? I think it would go with something like this.

I reenact all of Bert of a nation. What was the question again? There was no question. It was just kind of, you said, Crash Comedy. But Comedy Gold, I think, is the closest we have to an alt-room. Yeah, definitely. But I definitely, I see that becoming, I see more clubs like that emerging. There's definitely, would you consider yourself an alt comic?

I like a, I try to be alt and sometimes, yeah, I think I try to be alt. Yeah, yeah. Consciously? No, I think I, alt is like a weird label. I'm not even sure what it means anymore. I try to be original, I guess. Well, I would definitely say you're very original. Alt is negative connotations now where like, uh, yeah.

Now when you say alt comic, it means like he's a tiki torch and he, uh... Well, yeah, the thing is, this is what I thought. myself as like an old comedian for ages because the alt comedy in Ireland is really good like universally. Like most of the bad comedians are kind of traditional whereas like I went over to America and saw like

shitty alt for the first time where it's just like ukulele and this is a art of art act let's pick up a phrase now. But like alt now you know Sharad'sville that woman died those weren't old comedians those are alt right

yeah yeah so I think it's important for guys like you to take back much like black people talk the N-word you take back the word and stand up for it and say like you you fucking you don't kill people with your car as you neo-Nazis

I'm an all comedian I would just like to say it because we haven't said it yet and I think because it goes without saying but we'll just put it out there and we're both very big fans of your comedy very big fans yeah oh wow definitely yeah I mentioned you to people

yeah yeah really And they say, who are you? I say, you shut up, you. Matthew Tallinn is an old comedian. And you stop killing people with your car. I'm going to write now, like, an interpretive prop bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to have a lot toy car.

You're like a 21st, you were like a 21st century, John Spelan. No one get that, but I like it. That's good. That's cool, though, because I, Brian was one of the first. people I saw who I was like holy shit what the fuck is this yeah yeah and then I saw you later and really loved

I saw you and also like you I saw Brian's at holy shit I saw James like yeah he's trying good for him he's trying good for him constructed bits thank you

thank you back dude no but only would you consider yourself all front you have like I don't mean to all but that's not like the character that's me people see I like the character you create I'm trying to be

as mainstream as possible this is just how I am I wonder what it would look like if you deviated from that if you try to okay let's just push the envelope see how out there I'm not jama

I'm not bragging but if I try to go out I could probably start a civil war in this country I'm just saying certain groups would get royaled up yeah oh god i'd love to see it yeah i guess i suppose consider myself then traditional because it is very i'm not old one thing i'm always afraid of the jokes i tend to write and tell are i guess on the edgier or dark side and i'm just really afraid that i'm coming across is trying to be

like oh that's right i'll say anything i'm outrageous well it's like what i was saying about like all pack where like your stuff is there's a lot of comedians coming out now doing like hacky dark edgy stuff that makes it bad when you have like smartly written like funny energy jokes but people just think of that sort of yeah the band's and then I raped a baby wait that's great I need to write that that's like always the thing

there's something to that love your stuff man it's so dark it's like well it's also I mean I write it well I think though and some people like oh fuck I know how dark it is but you don't like it for right reason yeah some people it's weird so you do get those laughs

and just like I think you're just laughing because like a black person died in this joke. Yeah, yeah. Like, I've heard of her comics say, like, if a, someone comes up to him, like, oh, that does

really offensive me, yeah. You're like, oh, I don't want to care. Well, if someone goes up to, like, I fucking love it when you talked about, don't fucking, you know. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. Someone's fucking saying. Yeah, yeah. It's like, oh, right, well, I don't want to...

You should come to our weekly meeting in the basement. Yeah. I don't really like it. It's like fucking black clans, man. Yeah, it's it's, it's... That's a big problem with doing it. But I consider your stuff to be edgy as well, Brian. He has like a smile, I feel like, that passes it off.

Yeah. I'm actually trying to not smile on stage anymore. Oh, yeah. I'm really changing my set now. Oh, I don't think I've seen you recently apart from roasting. I'm going in strange new directions. One word, no, two words, big hat. Big hat.

I'm going to wear a big cowboy hat and I'm going to fire actual guns. I've actually, Fred Cook. I saw him do a character where he had a cowboy hat and he was like, Yehaw, partner. That's not a good representation of it, but he's doing some kind of like

cowboy character. He opens for himself now. Yeah, that's funny. Actually, the last time I did the intro, I went on in between Fred Cook and Fred Cook, but the character first. And so he's very, like,

very sing-songy. He just, like, he created a certain... You create a certain energy when you come out with the guitar. It's a big party. Then I came out. and I had punchlines and people were forced to listen

they didn't appreciate it I came off the stage and then Fred came back out to overwhelming applause and it just it just was the last time I did the intro I never do well in the enter I don't know what it is

me neither it's a very hard vibe to crack yeah yeah I just can't I can't mask you know yeah I love the inter yeah you always do very well in the enter I love there's something I like about not having a mic and just kind of being pushed out there and like what's a hi why you do

and like even if it's kind of dead like it's well, like. Something about silence in the inter, it's better than anywhere else. There's a hum of history. Yeah. You can hear the bad things that happen. Because we know, you, you know yourself. Oh, yeah.

A lot of evil there. You go to the internet, there's just two twins. Forever and ever. Just blood everywhere. There's an elevator door. There's no elevator in that place. Just open, just blood goes anywhere. Oh, why is the blood still on the floor? I thought the guys was coming to clean it up.

What's going on here? This is bullshit. Hey, come on. This is crazy. These fucking twins ask me for a fucking spot all the time. Hey. I didn't need you a fucking spot. What are you, the Lucas brothers? You're something, get out of here.

Come on. Okay, I'm with that. I think you can wrap it up. Are we cutting that? No. No, definitely not. You join you as well as though. We're all completely.

listen in that one we're all going down yeah yeah well look it's been so nice to have you yeah thank you for coming i can you want to plug real quick before you go oh i didn't even think of that yeah probably i'm doing um we'll have just have the same next few days i don't know i guess i'm doing the salary in like a couple of weeks and um oh wait a minute no no i'm not that's because i have nothing to plug that was a dream i had uh okay i have a couple of gigs but I can't remember. I have like one next week and one the week after.

Can you mention when you go on those gigs? Can you mention money? Because, uh, it ain't going well? It ain't go well. I spent all my money getting us my tunes. I fell for that scam

where the Nigerian prince emailed me that Nigerian prince said he gets my iTunes. That's the Nigerian prince said he knew Tim Cook. Okay, well that's, I didn't you have to plug James No actually I've got nothing coming up

Same with me We're fucking notting Not fucking nothing Promoters Listen to us We're fucking desperate I will get on my knees Anyway that's the end of the show

Thank you very much Thanks for listening Good night Bye Bye