Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Episode 144 : The Matthew Tallon Hoax

Episode Date: January 24, 2022

Matthew Tallon meets Bush Man insta: @tallonmatthew

All right. We're off. Listen out on some killer Harmony, Kareem. Yeah, I was just talking about the, I was talking about my love, my childhood love of Krang magazine. Hello, everyone. Welcome to the podcast. Kerang was awesome. It's the Krang special.

It's the Kareng special. Hey, mom and dad, leave the room because we're about to rock out. Yeah, we're busy listening to panic at the disco. But now, yeah, that's where I learned of the movie, kids, the Harmony, Kouraine, Larry Clark movie, which, you know, when I was like 14, I was like, why is this so. controversial. I don't get it. It's fine. And then you rewatch it as an adult you're like, oh, okay, I see. Yeah, that's

bad. He probably shouldn't have even made this film. I haven't seen it. Have you ever seen it? I always get the vibe that it was like, like a darker skins or something. Yes, that's exactly what it is. Just like those, like... It's another Harmony Corinne children having sex movie. Well, it was his first one. He like

wrote the screenplay when he was like 21. Don't put it down, right? Yeah. This is an innovator in the genre. I like the film. I don't want to watch it again, to be honest. It's a good movie, but definitely it's the, like, if you haven't seen it when you were a teenager, if you see it now, if the first time as an adult, you feel very uncomfortable. Yeah. Because those are clearly underage teenagers making out and, you know, there's not a lot of clothes. And I got to question Larry Clark's, his motivation for making the school.

He was a photographer, like, so he was like a really big photographer, not a big photographer, but well-known kind of had his own. little like following or whatever but like he started like taking photographs of these like skateboarders in new york you know like oh i think it's really cool i'm gonna like take and then i guess that's how he met harmony corin who gave him the screenplay for kids and it's all about teenagers having sex and larry clark is like i'm gonna remortgage my house and make this movie this is my life's work right here and that's what happened and yeah like all of larry clark's movies since then have all sort of circled around the same subject matter kind of like, you know,

Todd Salons, trying to recapture happiness, you know what I mean? That movie. Yeah. Well, we haven't even introduced, Matthew Talon's on the show. Matthew Talon's on the show. Yeah. Sorry. And we were like, what does he like? So, teenagers having sex.

We're just going to run through every single. So, yes, welcome to Brian and James fuck each other with returning guest, fan favorite. A real fan favorite. Personal friend. You guys that to everybody. Personal friend of the show. At least one of those things I said has to be true. Yeah. But I'll never tell which. I'm so sure they're shitting on all of us. Welcome back. Welcome back, Matthew.

Hello. It's great to be here. It's great to be back. No, our fans do have a lot of taste. They like people and don't like certain people, but I mentioned your name to someone he got excited. Not like, you can get hurt. But like, he was like, oh, I remember him. Give me his name and his number and I'll call him up. I'll tell you. Evan. There. Evan Yeah Yeah Call him up

Like Hey is this Evan That's right It's talent Happy birthday Buddy Yeah I will make you hard Before this episode

Is through Evan Evan Evan's like I make a wish kid Like Evan When I bring you in He knows

Something's wrong Evan Evan He can't He's late to the game To the Brian and James You know Because like

We only met him Like About a year ago Now maybe more It's been Longer than that Yeah But like

He's like He's like Binged every episode And he's very Like Especially when there's A guest

He doesn't Like He was like Oh I didn't like that one no name and shame no I couldn't possibly do that no no not in the new year we're different now he's a teacher now can you

believe that really they're giving this guy access to kids yeah secondary school as well very Larry Clark oh my god maybe he's making his own kids where they find a hard drive full of Brian and James yeah that's what got Pete Townsend done in

it was just research yeah what's great to have you here welcome back yeah so Talon, fill me in. It's been, like, well over a year, I think. It feels like a year since you were on last time. Yeah, I know, it was in the old Gaff. And you were in the Gaff before that as well.

This is like, this is like the third house that I've moved to. That's how Rich James is. Yeah, yeah, I got to keep moving around, you know. Real estate mogul. How old until I have a family, it's like, okay, kids, pack your bags. I know it's 2 a.m., but we got to get the fuck out of here. That's so grim that it's been like, three years of us just come back and doing this

none of us have gotten more successful well you have you're like published at hot press now you're a big deal big swinging dick over here fill us in and what's been so like you were as an actor said to a bishop stop that sorry yeah not when he's in the room yeah he wrote

for hot press so you've been gigging like fuck you've been working you've been writing you were in America that's part of the reason I wanted to get you on and tell me what's it like over in the States. Yeah, yeah. I went and saw the bright new world, the land of the Wu-Tang Clan. Nice. And, uh, Staten Island, right? Yes. We were having that conversation. They are Staten Island, right? Wutang? Yeah, no, they came from Staten Island, which I didn't go to. I asked everybody, like, where to go in New York and they're like anywhere except

Staten Island. Apparently they've bought most of Staten Island, though. They've come like evil slumlords. They, uh, really? Yeah, because they said they were going to like reinvest in the community to build it up. And then they haven't done. shit there. They just own all the same stuff. Oh, that's so cool. That's so good. That is as good as like ODB showing up to the welfare office in a limo to still collect is awesome. He's picturing Rizzen an all-white soup and it's kind of like like holding money being like, little light today.

Did you guys watch their documentary? Or a TV show? They did a documentary and then they made a TV show. I've watched YouTube documentaries. Is this like a newer, fancy one? It was like a Showtime one that they made themselves. It's that proper, like, the same thing NWA did where they're just, like, so self-mythologizing. Oh, right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And they just blame all the, like, horrible shit that they did on Riz's brother, Divine, like, anything that goes wrong with the group, they're like, and, you know, I wanted to, Riz's, like, I wanted to pay everybody fairly and give them all their contracts back. But Divine. Oh, I didn't know anything about Divine. Divine intervention, eh? Oh, dear.

He's like a, like, a crack dealer who, like, funded a lot of their, like, the early stuff, yeah. That's cool. Oh, that's cool now. I started watching the show, but I literally only got like two episodes in. So I probably saw the Vine, but I, I, you know. Well, like, the NWA movie is so bad. Oh, that's like, yeah. I mean, it's, it's, like, it's a competently made movie, but it's such like a bullshit whitewashing, like, makes them look so cool and awesome and completely, like, negates to discuss any of the horrible shit they did.

The fact that Dr. Dre, like, literally can't meet a woman without kicking the fuck out of her. And in the film, Dr. Ray is, like, he's, like, volunteering. like a women's hostel and he's like oh I just respect him so much baby it's only our third date let's take it slow we don't need to do nothing he's like writing think pieces for the New Yorker about women's

rights gonna start a website called Jezebel this Barry Weiss chick has got some good ideas and they blame all the problematic shit that they did on their best friend who died from AIDS they just anything bad they just give to him to straddle for

or Paul Giamatti he's always his shapecoat. Not like his character in film. Actual apology, Marty. So you went over to America, and this is recently enough, wasn't it? Yeah, I went over for, it was actually crazy in hindsight that I went over

because I forgot that COVID existed basically while I was over there, and I was like a close contact like seven times. Oh, really? And I didn't get it, so like, but yeah, I went over for like Christmas time, did some gigs and, uh, what was that like?

What kind of gigs are you talking about? I was like shitty, open mics, you know. Like Chinese restaurant kind of gigs. Yeah, yeah. It was very, like, grim and very, like, everybody's just in their notebooks. Nobody talks to you.

And then if you go up and do well, they're like, oh, hey, man, that was fucking, oh, we should be friends. We should hang out and stuff. Is it full of, like, networkers and stuff? Like, uh, yeah, a lot of people were really nice. Wumpertson brought us to, like, a punk gig afterwards. That was really fun. They liked that we were Irish, obviously,

because I was there with Keene, Jordan, and Ben Morgan. Okay. What a little posse you guys had there. yeah up to no good it was very like it was such a short term like we got invited to this party and then we turned up

and everyone was like the fucking Irish guys are here the fucking and then like 45 minutes later nobody was speaking to us just in a corner with like the one other guy that they clearly didn't want at the party who was telling us about like

Minecraft or something oh great yeah so we were very much in like the loser corner do you feel like they had expectations where it's like the Irish guys are here yeah yeah shit up with their whiskey.

No, yeah. I think Americans in general are, they were, like, I was surprised by how nice they are, but it's a very specific, like, kind of, it's kind of like when you do, like, a job interview and people are nice to you. They're very, like, they're very, like, vain, and they want to know, like, like, everybody that you speak to, they, like, drop the most famous person they've ever spoken to within, like, five minutes of talking to you. Sweet.

Oh, you're a comedian. I work for Lauren Michaels, and, you know, it's... Really? Yeah, one person was like that. And then she was like... In what capacity did she specify? That's the thing is that it's like, I work for Lauren Michaels. And I was like, what do you do?

And then it's like, oh, I work for the video company that's a subsidiary of his company. NBC gift shop. You're not working on the three Amigos sequel then? I met a girl in Galway one time. And she just dropped that she like her dad had dinner with Lauren Michaels one time. But it's such a like non... What are you supposed to do with that? like, oh, what did he have?

Yeah, there's not a lot of places that you can go with it. I think the idea is that, like, you're then supposed to talk about a famous person that you met, and then they're like, oh, this guy's important, I can keep talking to them. Yeah. But I've never met any. You guys are the most famous people I know. Oh, you could open quite a few doors in New York City if you drop our name. Dorn here's with us.

Not exactly doors you want to go through, mind, but, you know, they're there. So you went over there, and what was the... Where did you stay? we stayed in he's just locked up up like a travel website Brian we didn't need to invite him

right saying I plan tickets what's the story there sounds like you're just planning a trip and you brought me along

just to book it for you we stayed in a Airbnb in Korea town which was which was fun that was good you made like

shifty eyes there no geez I just wonder was it was a shitty or was it nice it was really shitty

it was unbelievably shitty keen Jordan stepped in human shit one of the days. Oh dear. It's bad when you can tell straight away that it's human shit as well.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, dear. The guy who took it was still just over the other side of the bathroom staring at him eagerly. And did you go down to the subway? These are good questions. Yeah, they are, yeah. I'm like Kimmel here. Just don't start crying. We took the subway.

The fans the whole time there. That's a train under the ground. it stopped and other people were like we're supposed to get off and we're like no we were coming to the subway we didn't want to go anywhere else so yeah in turn like so you say shitty open mics like in terms of the numbers were there was it just kind of perform to the other comedians or were there actual crowds there you know yeah it actually was fun to be fair I'm just bitter because I was supposed to do like a big show at the end of it and then I got canceled because the the host had COVID so I'm like all these fucking gigs weren't good enough for me I was supposed to do the big time I was supposed to be fucking with famous. people. Oh, really? What was, tell us a little bit about that,

the big show. Oh, no, I just was like, I was meant to be on like, do you guys know Catherine Cohn? She's like a,

like a New York comedian person. I'm sorry. Cat Cone. Cohen. Cohen is in Roy Cohen. Yes. The lawyer.

Yes. Oh, now I'm on your side. Yes. A good man. Yes. So who's Roy Cohn? He was like a lawyer for Trump. Trump's dad,

right? They were friends. He was like, yeah, I think he was involved in like McCarthyism back a good history of like um yeah organized crime to yeah he's a shady shitty shit yeah so i kept turning up to gigs talking about how much i love trump and most people spat in my face but then this one person was like oh you must know my brother roy cone that you're

dropping that name like um roy cone anybody no angels in america you know what i'm talking about oh is he the guy who the angels of america by his base yeah yeah oh and how connected with trump was he uh good friends good friends yeah yeah uh he was um disown him when he like i didn't disown him but just didn't talk to him ever again but i don't think he publicly was like you know i'm not i didn't touch him him he wasn't like that well i think he's just like i'm just not going to let him in the building case he touches something yeah yeah and like gives it it but you know you got immortalized than a famous play yeah so you know swings and roundabouts

comedy in new york city i mean that is kind of the mecca really is finding some good questions it is really good to be fair like it's so crazy because like you go to i with the gigs i went to watch like people were like excited to see it and audiences were like happy to be there any do you see any kind of like bigger comedians like you know yeah i saw roy wood junior that was pretty fun oh shit he's class he was unbelievable i'd never seen it i'd heard of him a bunch and it was like watching fucking younger chappelle or something he just had like crazy energy yeah he has a lot of energy i didn't think he'd have that or like i mean like crazy stagecraft, like he's really controlled

the audience. Yeah, he's got a great style because he, like, he did radio for years, so he's very comfortable just talking and, yeah, he's like, he's like 50 something, so he's been around the block for a long time, and you can tell he was just watching stuff on YouTube. Yeah, he's like an old dog, you know? Yeah, he

took over, this isn't happening from Ari Shafir, right? He, as the host or whatever? I believe so, yeah. After Arir Shafir was like, I'm glad Kobe's dad. No, this is before this. Before that, there was some, he had some fallen out of Comedy Center or whatever. It was to do with Netflix. He wanted to do stuff with Netflix as well

and Comedy Central like, you can't you know, you can't wife swap here. You're with us. You've got to stay with us. And he was like, fuck you. Yeah, Ari Shafir burning down a work relationship. Who would have thought? Who could imagine? Yeah. But no, I mean, it was

fun, you know? It was a good trip. People are like, like, it is it's everything that you like expected to be where you're like walking down the street and people are like yelling random shit. There was Like one time we were walking by and this Amazon delivery driver in like a big truck was just honking his horn, yelling out into the kind of the abyss. He was like, uh, uh, I need to take a shit. Nice.

And some guy was like, shit on yourself, fool. And then a lady on the other side of the street just started clicking like preach. Oh, yes. And that's what you go there for. So that's the kind of energy we need in Dublin. This kind of, you know, they say Dublin's dead now. We need more just anger and mental illness in this city. you have that? I mean, there's a lot of that.

Yeah, but more entertaining, you know? Well, there is the feeling there that everybody is just, like, keeping all this stress, like, pent up so much. Like, clearly that delivery driver has been, like, working some, like, 35-hour shift. He's built all this up. He probably isn't allowed to take his shit and accept in a box. And, like, he's gotten past the point of reason

where the only thing he can think to do is just, like, yell out for help. And the rest of the city is just, like, no, fuck you. It really is, like, a sort of a dance like no one's wife. watching kind of thing, you know, that we really need to embrace over here. Like, I really hate to be one of those guys. Some people, like, the romance and wax lyrical

about New York so much, it's, like, sickening, you know, like this city. Only in this city could this thing happen. Only in this city could two people fall in love. New York, like, they go overboard. But there is definitely, like, from what I've seen, like, such a weird pent-up energy where, like, any second someone could either, like,

just shit themselves or take out a knife or, like, you know, start seeing, like, Hamilton like it's like there's no rhyme or reason at all but it's weird because the New Yorkers like romanticized that part of it as well where they could walk past the guy like taking a shit and then like stab it himself and they'd be like it's like a Woody Allen movie it's like when Harry I'll have what he's having so you were over there how long were you over in America I was there for 10 days 10 days okay I'm sure I didn't feel like enough or at the end really like fuck no I actually it's weird the people I was there with were a little bit like

fuck this because they they thought that like we all had fun but they kind of thought the people there were like a little bit fake and like corny stuff but I am also very fake I love I was like tell me more about Lauren Michaels so I really want to move there but yeah I've

said this to many people and I'll say to your face I think you do very well in America I think you're you're wasted here you need to be over there people are stabbing themselves and shit and hate me hear people like get your New York shit out of here I'll put money down like you You'll outlive us all, like, you'll have a career with me, me would be like Statler and Waldorf, you know?

I definitely, I don't know what you guys. I do feel like stand-wise, I feel like you need to get out to do anything here. Yeah, yeah, I mean, it feels like downhill here. Yeah, it doesn't. Our only hope is to wait, like, 30 years until everyone else is, like, the same level of mental illness as we are. Like, until, like, Colchis start, like, getting 4chan. You guys are ahead of the curve in that way. Like, you guys are the future of mental illness.

this country we're breaking barriers here man yeah yeah we're kind of we've completely moved past any sense of compassion or empathy is like well you're mentally ill freak even though we are both extremely mentally ill that's just us in the mirror like yeah yeah yeah so um you're over there with um this is really nothing to do with you at all did ben go see an NFL game yeah Ben uh Ben went off in his own little event I was kind of like heirs see living through his life yeah yeah it's cool about Ben is that like, uh, me and Kean were like such fucking nerds where we'd be like spending the first two hours being like, okay, what are we going to do today to like maximize our fun quotient. Yeah. And then Ben was just like, oh yeah, I'm going to fuck off to Washington, D.C.

tomorrow. And he just spent like 200 bucks on a bus and just like, oh, I guess Ben is gone. Yeah, he just saw, he saw a Cowboys game. Like those are not like cheap tickets. Like he, uh, no, he was living a completely different life. Yeah, he really was just like so impulsive about it. Although I felt back because the same kind of like happy-go-lookiness, when we were getting the plane back, Ben, I'm not going to, this is a podcast, I'm not going to say that he was incredibly high, but. Okay, okay. No one would believe that, by the way. He literally came on this podcast and was ripping bong hits. I was terrified.

Well, that's the thing. We turned up to the airport and he was like, oh, I have all these edibles left that I didn't eat. And he just downed all of them. Really? Yeah. That's crazy. drank like four cans. It's like just in the airport.

lobby and then he like lost all of his luggage did you look at him disapprovingly rye wood junior wouldn't do that no I felt really bad because he kind of he kind of left it with me without telling me that he was leaving it with me because he just was like the plane was boarding and he was just like I'm gonna go get a pint I thought he was kidding because it was like we were getting on the plane yeah yeah then I just turned around and he was gone so I was looking for him and he'd left all of his stuff there and somebody like stole it so it's like yeah it's New York's a crazy city you know

man fucking I'm still kind of like the edibles thing like to down all your edibles before getting on a plane like edibles fuck you up so I'm like obviously he's got a good tolerance and he could handle it but I couldn't think of anything worse literally if I took one edible and got on a plane I would be that guy

he's like I'm getting off now no you can't you can't make me stay here that's the thing I didn't weed is like legal there and I didn't do any just because like if I like freaked out in a foreign city I would be like getting really panicked. You know what's good when you just admit

yourself like I can't smoke weed properly like that's the thing I'm trying to get used to that because still if other people are doing it I'm like I don't want to be shit crack and then I smoke it and I'm like the worst. Like a little puff just like you know be a little bit high like but like you know back in the day for me anyway I'm sure you guys probably had the same kind of thing it's like they're all

taking like big hits and you're like well I have to take big hits as well just yeah you know to pass the test Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I started doing all that stuff, like, late. So everybody else had already built up a tolerance. Then I'm like, ooh, what's this? This weird smelling cigarette, you guys.

Oh, you just like take it. Yeah, start hearing White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane. Yeah, I think the first time I smoked it was like at the Edinburgh Fringe at like 9.30 a.m. with Cornelius O'Sullivan. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I always went to some like diner afterwards. And then I like hid in the bathroom for like 45 minutes. I thought that I was there for like five hours

and I thought they'd left and then I came out and they'd like only just started their eating. It was like 10 minutes. When you're high like Dan, you can't handle it. You get so obsessed with the fact that like they're all going to know I'm pulling the white here. They're all going to know. And it's not like it'll be slightly embarrassing.

It's like, they'll hate me. I know, yeah. I'm not like that at all. Like I'll, when I get too high and paranoid, I'll be like, I'm having a bad time. So now everybody needs to come together and help me through this. Self-inflicted inconvenience. Help me.

I'm very much, I make it everybody's problem. It's like, we're in this together now. Yeah, but I've got a really bad tolerance. Like, I can, like, very sensitive to it. I'll just, like, I'll just get a little bit stone, but it's so easy to overdo it. And then I'm in the same boat. I'm hiding in the bathroom, crying to myself.

Yeah. God, it's fun, isn't it? I pulled a big Whitey and Whistle Binkies, if you know that one in Edinburgh. Yeah, right. proper like on the way there I fell twice on the way from like you know the big room

and Whistle Binkies it's like Is that where Chris's show is? Yeah the big it's not even a room It's kind of like where the the show has happened Whistle Binkies

From the walk to Dairy listeners out there Yeah it's like how long is that It's like the full Irish Yeah yeah all the homies Yeah It's like wilder now But isn't that that's like fucking like 14 steps maybe

Yeah I fell over twice Who got you high? Who gave you... I would say who, but he's been on the podcast. His name's Jason, so... Oh, Brennan? Yeah, yeah.

Of course he would. Fucking junkie scum. Hippy, beat Nick, get a job. Well, he has a job, but you know... Yeah, he's much more successful. But we need to have an intervention because he's too successful. He needs to be like us.

That shit was probably last, bro. He's probably got PCP in there. You wouldn't know what the fuck he's doing. Yeah, he's probably doing it to fucking sabotage you. He's smoking. the gansh he's giving you crystal meth

from the whistle binkies yeah ruin your reputation with fucking Chris we're an awful place to die in whistle binkies because you have

to headline like tragedy in whistle binkies the world's first weed overdose and whistle binkies so you're back now

in Dublin what are you at now what's the plan five year plan lay it out that gives me right now what are fucking

any of us at I got COVID when I got back, me and yeah, I'm running, oh, well, I guess I'm running a gig if that's fucking plug it. Yeah, yeah, I'll fucking, most people do their plugs at the end, I do it right,

fucking in the middle, people are paying attention. Me and we have like a night in Chenet, like every Friday and Sunday, hysteria comedy. And what's the plan with that now? Is that coming back soon, or? Depends on, I guess by the time this comes out, the announcement will have happened. Whenever, like, gigs are allowed

happen after 8 p.m., it'll be back. And then I'm doing a big gig in the sugar club that like I really need a hawk tickets to oh nice yeah yeah riding on that yeah yeah yeah yeah my whole career I invested a lot of money in this you guys and you could please all come I don't know if the comedians will be funny but it'll be a nice gesture now it was meant to be on like a while ago and got pushed back in it's meant to be on it was like the day after restrictions started in December so really just by the wire how is that affected line up is that going to be a completely different lineup here

with the spots available? It's mostly the... I think spots you go to the guy who wasn't being rude and asking for them. He was just being cool and sat there like a gentleman. First Craig Moore and then me.

You guys are just getting the city of Bookers as a guest on your show. Oh no, they've rumbled us. We've got to kill talent and delete this episode. No, it's on the 23rd of February. Tickets go on sale like this Saturday.

It's like Shane Daniel Byrne and Justine Stafford and Emily Ashmore, another former guest, slash Instagram influencer, Keen Jordan, me, and fucking Peter McGahn and John Spont. Oh,

Peter McGahn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, McGahn is class. He's unreal. I've never seen him now, actually. Oh, no,

I saw him do a rose battle against McGaher, but he was doing the Liam Nugent character. Well, Liam Nugent is like the funniest. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did get Liam Nugent on the podcast. Not Peter. Not Peter.

Don't break character. Yeah, yeah, that's the thing. You book him and then he turns up and he's Peter. No. Don't talk about your mental health. Yeah. Do the funny character. Yeah, do the ironically racist guy.

That's what Bernie James want. We're on the same wavelength, man. So have you been up to much else? No. I think I was saying this before we even started, right? This is like my... I have not been. leaving the house you know what is there to fucking do i have a job but it's oh yeah what's your new

job you'll say exactly what is but you can say like what you know it's good i'm just laughing because it's like uh the most boring thing but it's uh i work in a theater but i just not boring you're with the young people you know the theater people you know they look down on you because your staff so much yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah do they throw glitter in your face and then call you a nonce they refused to I thought that's what the job would be and then they turned up

and they just want me to do admin work I was like I brought my own glitter please I do have a dream in my head like it is all like they're like very free and they're all like they're doing cool stuff and having fun parties and stuff

is it like that or they're all kind of bitching yeah it's it's both like everybody the theater world makes the comedy world look like we're all really good friends who care about each other

they're so big itchy. Because they're all like, I remember I was at some party and they were all bitching about this one person. Everybody worked for this one theater company. We're like bitching for like two hours about this one person. And then in the weekend I went in because we worked together and I was like, oh yeah, I was talking to these lot. And then she was like, oh yeah, those are my best friends. Oh, wow. It's very grim. It's beautiful. It really made me feel like we have a lot of camaraderie in our world. How much they kind of like hate each other? Comparatively, I suppose. Yeah, because I think our bitterness and hatred isn't we'll fuck around and talk shit about each other but there's

no real yeah not you know it's not like i i just few people few listeners i know they're like oh you must hate that guy you know you even remember talking shit about him yeah yeah oh yeah just trying to fill the time you guys just talk shit about a lot of people we have done that yeah but there's not really anyone that i'm like literally like oh if i get a chat me and you together oh it's fists in the air i don't think there are many comedians i hate on a personal level there's a lot of people who's comedy i don't like you know that's just like that's i think that's just because you the people that you kind of don't like you end up having to watch like 20 times and then it goes from like oh they're not really my thing to like fuck i can't watch this

person do that same set again but also it's not like i love my comedy so much or i have like a deep like you know i'm doing the right way buddy that's the thing yeah you're watching me you're taking class i'm imparting wisdom here yeah yeah yeah yeah How's the, let's get a bit dirty here. Go. How's the, the relationships going? How's that? You crushing, bro?

This is like stern here. Getting that sneeze. How much money you're making who you fucking? What about Kean Jordan? You fuck, you're little esch? What do you talk? Come back, tell me, ma. He doesn't talk like that.

Oh, no. None of that goes on. I have a girlfriend. Oh, yeah. Get on. How'd you meet? You have been booked on this. show under false pretences.

I actually, I don't want to be bad. I don't want to talk about anything nice in my life that I could ruin. That's respectable, actually. I actually hate you. I hate you if you're like, we just, we just connect. That's the thing.

The only way to be funny is to shit on it. I actually am just like, enjoying it. She's a dog breed, dude. She's a dog breed, dude. What about you guys? That's the control of bitches, man. Do you know what I'm saying?

Did you meet? You can say this, though. It was it like an impersonating or Tinder or Bumble or... It was like we went out a year ago on Tinder and it didn't really work out then. And then we just like bumped into each other on the street. Bumble's been fucking me up. Bumble, I don't know why, but for some reason it says I'm in Colombia now. Wow.

The location's fucked up and I'm trying to figure out. As in the country, Columbia. Yeah, I think I've been hacked. I looked up my location history on Google and it says I went to do a chicken shop in Colombia like two weeks ago. That's funny because you were dining on some. Colombian cock not too long ago chicken right

come on boom boom but I checked my like my haven't been like no money got taken on my account

or anything I changed my passwords just in case that's kind of fun somebody hacks your account just because

they want to live somebody out there just wants to be rhino too much some Colombian chicken farmer definitely someone

who works in the theatre right away because even comedians aren't that mentally yeah I don't know

how I keep deleting my history but then it keeps coming back that wasn't Colombia So I'm not sure how to change.

It's probably something real simple, but I can't, but it only happens to go back to Carlo. So when I'm in Fingles, I'm trying to match with, like, Dublin girls and it's coming up. But then, like, when I go back to Carlo,

then it's all Colombian ones. They're like, you know, who are you, white boy? We're just trying to smash in the city of God. That was my intro when I was on Bumble as well. That's good. You're not going out with that Brazilian one anymore. No, no, that was a complete disaster.

her. And for you I'm still not healed from it. Have you talked about it on the pod yet? A little bit yeah. What happened? Like, oh,

just she wants to move in with me and I was like, I don't really want to move, like, I'm at the start. Here's why I fucked up, I said yes at the start. But then like,

as it got closer to it, I was like, ah, I don't really want to move in with you. And then it led into a whole thing then, like, it was a, it was a silly thing anyway,

like. You were giving her money as well, I gave her a lot of money. A lot of money. Yeah, yeah. But here's the, I am a bit of a thin dom. I do like giving women money now.

That's the opposite of a fin, though. I think Larnie, Kevin Larnie was like tough. I gave Larnie money as well. I think Kevin got concerned. He was like, Brian, don't stop giving that person money. Yeah, you don't understand. Yeah, you don't get it, man. You know I love.

Yeah, I did give her quite a lot, quite a lot money now. How much do you reckon? Oh, about 800. Jesus Christ. Here's the thing. I'm not very, you know, financially responsible. No, clearly. See, the thing is like she.

booked a ticket to come to Ireland because she thought she was going to live with me and then after she booked it so I should have said to start like no I don't want you to live with me but at the time I kind of convinced myself no it'll be fun you know have someone with me you know

and I'm still if you honest I'm very lonely at the moment and I'm kind of like maybe I should have let her live with me maybe this is the biggest mistake ever made in my life well it sounded like you guys had like a very fiery relationship by which I mean it sounds abusive but no it was great though

her family were mental cunts Oh yeah that was it They always were saying That she was like stealing from them or something Yeah they said that she broke their last They were accused of all sorts of breaking property And stuff like that Which now that she took 800 off you

I'm starting to decide with the family I gave it to her But does she ask or did you offer? I felt bad Okay I gave her lots of money You know where she is now? She's in Ireland right?

She is in Ireland Yeah Yeah let's reach out to her on this Like sleepless in Seattle or something Yeah You've got male. If you like Pina coladas. But she's posting pictures with a different lad now.

So I think it's like a thing. I think she's still angry with me, which she should be, you know, because I said, I should have just said, I, that's not. Well, here's the thing. Like, if, if it was cheap enough to get a place in Dublin for couples, I might have done it, okay? But it was so expensive and she didn't have a job at the time. Also, like, any kind of like room sharing or like house sharing situation,

Like, a lot of them specify no couples. They're very, they're very anti-love. Yeah. Yeah. To be honest, it's the one thing I agree with landlords. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they got that one down. They don't understand my love. I try to explain that.

I was like, I gave her 800 euro. I love her. Just on daft. Dotty, you're writing a big email. But apart from that, no, it hasn't been going well there. I was talking to an Indian girl for a while, and we did, we met up, but like, it's not even like a cultural thing. It's just like, we were just very, shouldn't get my references and stuff.

and like we ran out with stuff to talk about fairly quick. Are you being served and Doctor Who? Yeah. I was just wondering is what woman does like the same stuff as you. There are dog brains, dude. They don't know Mr. Humphreys. But it's just like, and then like we did, we did, you know, ride. And I think I've been a bit, I think my brain's a bit messed up because it was just like, you know, I don't want to say too much, but it was like conventional sex, you know.

Well, in fairness, now, after, if anybody listened to last week's Patreon, they know that you've set the bar pretty high. Oh, really? Yeah. Not to tread over old ground, but you like... I had a sex. I had sex with a man in the ass. Which ass? He fucked...

A man ass. No, you fucked a dude in the ass. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fucking egg. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was a good one.

But, like, so then to go back then just, like, missionary and, like, she said she'd like be choked. but, like, it was very, like, mild, choking. Oh, you're talking a bit too far. And then when she woke up half an hour later, you're like, too hard. You got, like, cattle prods. But it was just kind of like, ah, it's just like, you know,

because the last few girls have been very, like, you know, where I'm kind of like, I don't want, I'm going to get in trouble here, you know. They're very, like, you know, go for it. And, like, you know, you little weak bitch you call that joke. And, yeah, so just to, like, have kind of, missionary kind of sex I just did we didn't really connect

I don't know it just wasn't like no yeah yeah do you have you thought about going out with the guy again oh no no I'll be gay yeah you're right you can fuck a dude in the ass

yeah that's like that's prison rules hardcore yeah it is manly that's just dudes being dudes yeah it was about the power it was all power

it was the power domination yeah you go on a date with a guy that's fucking yeah and then like gave me a hundred euro because it's the power you know I have the power

that's the tooler special well I've kind of given up on I've kind of accepted that like I'm going to be one of those guys that like I just won't have like a proper relationship I'm going to be like emotionally stunted

and then I'm going to be in my 40s dating like a 20 you're going to be Desbishop you're going to be dating like a 21 year old and be like that guy like I show up at the college parties and I'm like what you guys don't know Nirvana

and I'm like what you guys don't know in Nirvana man bleach bleach was the shit never mind was way too commercial am I right yeah

my parents were born in 1992 what are you talking about so yeah I think I'm going to be like the sad kind of guy who's like you know they all say like Brian she's only using you

for your money and I'm like yeah I have nothing else to offer you know well if the credit union keeps giving me those loans I got nothing to worry about it's an investment okay

she's going to become a big star like Ariane de Grande and then you can be your Pete Davidson and fuck Kim Kardashian and get the shit beaten out of you by Kanye Last Jesus Christ Is anyone living better than Pete

Like if it was a competition Yeah Is there anyone I really don't think so I think he's actually the best Or definitely the luckiest human And I'm including the fact that his dad died in 9-11

Yeah yeah yeah even taking that in consideration i think you could now in like three years time i think you'd be like the pete davidson of uh ireland i don't know what that means mental ill i'm gonna kill my dad in nine eleven what would be the big irish star you could be banging like um like an r t news leader or jennifer zamporelli or something i think she's a les you can be banging fred cook stealing from julie yeah yeah and everyone else i don't get pregnant yeah everyone else is like that fucking dude how do you guys get, how do you get Fred Cooke?

How do you get Fred? He's there serenading me with his song parodies. And Julie J is like Kanye. She's starting to beat you up and so. She buys a house across from you guys. I would love that. That would be the dream. Become the Irish Pete Davidson.

Yeah, yeah. I'm going to see if there's anything we can talk about here. Yeah. We were watching a bit wild and out when we were downstairs. Just get in the mood, you know? Yeah. You never seen much wilding out. Not too much.

I've seen little bits, though. Yeah, like on YouTube and stuff. stuff, you know. I, you know, I said, is this from the BET network? No, it was not. So, yeah, that was a real, I was a, I was a Freudian slip on my part. It was MTV, apparently. I'll tell you what, there's no like segue this at all, but let's just jump into it. Or should we save to, I'll let you decide, okay? Do you want to do Marvel Minnie? You guys have segments now? Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we don't. This is a real jump-the-sharpment for Brian and Jane. People love Marvel Minnit.

you read that like you were going to give me a list of options you just want to do Marvel Minute We could do Marvel Minute Or conspiracy corner I've never heard of any Well I've heard of Marvel Minute But all right yeah look You're obviously creaming for Marvel Minute

We'll be Let me take another segment now Bitcoin Brian's Bitcoin Bash Nice yeah So what you want to do Marvel Do you want to do Let's do a Bitcoin Bash I'll do Marvel Minute

I want to hear Bitcoin Batch Okay, Bitcoin Bash, yeah I've started listening to like a Bitcoin podcast Yeah It's weird how like they're It's very new agey It's not just like oh it's like a new form of money It's kind of cool

It's very like this will change everything Society will collapse And this will save us And bring us into a new age Of enlightenment Yeah, this will end homelessness What? Yeah

Jesus Christ This will take the power away from landlords Because what you do is You take a loan out on your house And put it into something called bacon kind. Yeah. That's what's going to save us on.

And that way, because everyone loves bacon, it's like Ron Swanson. So this guy was saying that like the way it is, you can trick the landlord. So you take out a more, you take out the equivalent of your house, okay? He called it Lean. Okay. Take a lien out on your

house. Yeah. Put it into... Doesn't like the drink lien? No, no, you're thinking of wilding out again. no a lien i think it's like a mortgage i think it's the american term for like mortgage okay but how do you take a mortgage out a lot of people have lost their houses

spending money on lien i think you know yeah little wayne loves mortgages but anyway you basically take out the equivalent of your house okay and then put in the bacon coin but you split it among like 30 of your friends so that way the landlord can't take the house because it's 30 people own the house and you can all live in the house together

I don't how is that legal though does that go against some sort of tendency agreement I have no idea this guy seemed confident though yeah to be honest this hookster

seem confident yeah yeah I mean I'm getting a real snake oil salesman vibe of this shit like you know I think by the time

you know people like us find out about Bitcoin it's already too late like you know what I mean it's kind of anyone who's making

money of it is like they're dug in now I think if we came we're coming late to the game he's all saying it's interesting so with NFTs now

it's actually the good thing to do okay is that's say you have an uh you nfts the mona lisa yeah you need to destroy the mona lisa so the nfts is worth something yeah this is what it's uh nfts are incentivizing people to destroy original art wow because let's say um i draw a picture of a horse okay and i sell as an nfti what if i sell that to james and then you sell the horse in nfts okay then the original nfts has no value then okay interesting so you have to destroy it or what you've seen is you put into a public

trust to a bunch of people who agree not to sell it. Again, just very pyramid schemy. The whole thing just sounds like nonsense. And what's great in the podcast is the guy would ask like the most easiest questions and he would never ask like any false. He'd be like, so

what's stopping the group from like, so it's a group that promised not to sell the NFD art again? What if they decide to sell it? And the guy's like, they won't. Well, you've answered my question. And there you have it, folks. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I went to an art gallery

like a few weeks ago and at the start they had like this whole speech about how like art is being too run by like trans people and gay people and all these people because the art world is known for their conservative values but that's the thing then I walked around for a while and turned out the whole thing

was a huge advertisement for NFTs which you know is unsurprising really yeah yeah what can't see you're going to these kind of events okay And me and James just wanking in the corner somewhere watching wrestling Hey, Randy Savage or whatever that guy's called That would be a better way to spend your evening to be honest

So this is in Dublin Yeah, this was in like Taraneur or something Jesus I don't even know what that is But so like It was just all about NFTs was it But that's the thing is that none of it was about NFTs

Because I feel like the less you explain about NFTs the more convincing they are Because once you start trying to talk about if you were like, this is fucking insane. You're just trying to sell me a picture of like a cartoon monkey or something. Yeah. So it was just like, it was just very cool art, a bunch of like mirrors like that go on for infinity and shit like that. Stuff to disorient you so that you're ready to be susceptible to buy their pyramid scheme at the end of it.

You know, the way that there's no like windows. Yeah. No clocks. That was exactly it. They basically just trap you in this fun house mirror room. And then at the end of it, they're like NFTs. They're like money, but prettier. You could only do something like that in a place like Terranoe.

You couldn't do that like, you know, on Sheriff Street. Or Carlo. Yeah, yeah, true. You need people that have like disposable income and no inherent values. Like, yeah, okay. Cartoon monkey, here's 10 grand. Yeah, the monkeys are huge at the moment. Yeah.

Have you been following the monkeys? Bored ape. Is that what they're called? The Bored ape is one of the monkey groups, okay? No, I see them or they're like people's like profile picture. Yes, yes. Eminem just bought a monkey there for like, uh, I think like 25,000 or I think maybe 77,000. It really is insane.

If Eminem is, if my hero Eminem is doing it. Yeah, my accountant Eminem. Supplemental criminal. Uh, yeah, I don't know. The digital real estate thing as well. It's kind of like another expansion on it. Like, yeah. It's like you actually pay to own property in like, you know, Fortnite or Minecraft or the

metaverse eventually. apparently that's the only way to earn our own real estate now will be in a digital landscape supposedly I heard David McWilliams talk Is that his name

The Financial guy Remember he was big a few years ago And like no one really Nobody gives a shit about it anymore But he was saying This is a response to the fact that like Like me and you Let's be honest

We're not going to put enough money To get her to get a house Nah we're never owning anything Yeah So it's our response to like Well I'll buy a monkey then I'll buy a digital monkey And that'll be my...

It's like, yeah, oh yeah, I can't get any real land Well, maybe Virtual Land is the real land Yeah You've seen The Matrix And it's like, you know, rich people will buy it But it's just like a thing they buy like, oh, it's silly, you know Yeah Like, you know, you buy Napoleon's cock or something like that

But it's not good Or like a Wu Tang album for a million dollars Yeah, but it's not going to affect you really in the long run But it's people like us who are like I bought you, I own a you know I won't land next to Snoop Dog It's virtual Snoop Dog Yeah

Like will the ones They get fucked over eventually Yeah yeah Well it's they build it up And then by the time it gets to people like us Like James is saying We're like the last wrong And then it's all gonna implode

After we invest in it Yeah very much Like the bubble is just about to burst By the time you get in on it You know It's an interesting world though Because it is kind of like Just a collectivized

Insanity that everyone's like Has to believe in Because they've already put money into it Yeah But it's like But any time any of these people, as you said, try to explain it. It just becomes

like, it turns into like incomprehensible nonsense, but because they put so much money into it, they're like, no, this is real, this is mental it's like, then why can't you actually explain it to me without sweating and storming off, you know? And sniffing a lot.

Yeah, it's just like, you know, kind of cryptocurrency Bitcoin, that's like a pretty graspable concept. It's something you kind of be like, oh yeah, I yeah. If T's is just like, this is madness. It just doesn't seem to make any sense. I don't know.

And maybe I'm the old boomer bitch who's like, I don't understand anything. I mean, the art world itself is like pretty stupid. That's the thing. I bet some artists once who were like raving about it. And then like I tried to get them to explain it to me. And it became very clear that like you think you imagine artists have like integrity or whatever. But just nobody's offered them any money until now.

Now as soon as somebody's like, oh yeah, we'll cut you in on. this fucking pyramid scheme they're like oh no it's actually great it's actually the future of money they're all becoming like libertarians all of a sudden it's quite funny because the way like it's bad for the environment it's quite funny amount with them like no yeah

don't be a pussy the mining process for the crypto is bad as the environment right yeah yeah yeah yeah I don't understand that either if it's virtual how come it it's just that because it uses like for it to be actually profitable I believe you have to have like

multiple servers going 24-7 just to actually because like the process of it is you're just going through like infinite like plus combinations of code or whatever the fuck

like that's the mining process that's very simplified and probably wrong but yeah it takes a lot of energy apparently to do it let's get back to Marvel Minute you're really I mean none of us know what any of it is

now Marvel Minute I'm in it here you go now I've got two things talk about so Marvel Minute if you don't know as if you don't know If you've been living under a rock It's Brian's Marvel Minute So James hates Marvel stuff

Okay I don't hate it I just don't like it No I'm the same I think it's pretty shit Well I get a minute then To talk about and try and convince you It's always more than a minute

Yeah yeah yeah So I got two things One you probably won't like now But the other one is juicy enough I think I'll get you's okay That'll be dessert Give me the shit one first Yeah this is the vegetables

Okay Moon night The trailer for Moon Night just came out starring Oscar Isaac. Okay, he's Moon Knight, he's like Batman, but with like multiple personality disorder. Okay. So like he gets

power from an Egyptian god and he turns into Moon Knight. Don't look me like that. This is kind of like somebody explaining NFTs to you, you know what I mean? He's like, we'll do it with personalities, but there's an Egyptian god. And he's fighting Eaton Hawk, and I think Eaton Hawk's playing Dracula. Oh, okay.

Yeah, and he's going to turn up in the Blade movie next. Oh, awesome. And he He has another villain called Bushman. Now we're talking. Bushman. He's a black man who lives in a bush. Right. Yeah, okay.

What's his superpower? He's got a knife. And there's another guy. I think he's called like Sun Man, but he's dead now. He just died like four hours ago. So Moon Knight's enemy is Sunman. It's like Sunmaster or something like that. What do you mean he's dead?

He just died in a skiing accident like four hours ago. The actor? Yeah, the actor. He played young Hannibal Lecter and Hannibal Rising. He's like a French actor. Not. No idea.

Not that guy. Yeah. I'm my favorite actor. He's called something like Anzoel Zibbus or something like that. Yeah, he's a white guy. So, who cares? He's French.

But yeah, he just died in a skiing accident. Like, literally like four hours ago. That is so white French guy. That's so odd brand to die in a skiing accident. That's how they all die. Every single one of them. Yeah, you wouldn't catch Bushman doing that. Ah.

That's sun man, shit. White sun. White sun people shit. But yeah, it should be cool. It's six episodes in Disney Plus coming to October 30th. Sweet. I said October 30th, 2020. Yeah, yeah.

And you're already buzzing for it. You're just like so psyched. Yeah, your enthusiasm for that unplayed plug was like so much more than all this shit that I have all this money riding on. I was like, come or don't come. Watch Moon Knight or I'll kill myself. I'm invested. I'm sending money to moon night Yeah moon night

He's got like so Mark Specter he's a soldier Okay tough guy But in like Steve Grant He's like a British nerd Oh bully okay And he's like I wish I was moon night But he is moon night But he's multiple personality

He doesn't know Yeah Okay And another one he's a taxi driver It's crazy Sweet man What's the other thing That's awesome

Yeah I was looking into His name's Eich Pearl Nutter Okay Say that three times fast You'll get in trouble He's the former owner of Marvel

And he's interested now He's an ex-Israeli soldier Oh, okay Yeah And I mean proper Like he did like Was it a six day war There's some big thing

In Israeli history And he was proper like the front line Like let me at him Let me get him You know He was a really Israeli scrappy doo Okay So then he moves over

Scrappy Jew I couldn't help myself Go on So then he moves over to America then Okay And he's got like 20 quid in his pocket all right he starts selling like textiles and like i think like little toys for like uh like maybe like 10 cent extra like you know real small margins okay he works his way up he buys a toy company

then he buys marvel okay this is marvel he buys it back when they were like in the shit they're almost bankrupt okay what kind of decade 90s okay yeah still owned by stan lee stanley was definitely involved yeah right right so then he takes over but he is like um he's a big trump supporter okay yeah he's donated millions to trump okay and he's always hanging out with trump at the golf course and stuff like that and he's very problematic oh are marvel making this movie about him no no no he's just the owner okay current owner this isn't this in the movie about him this just his life yeah oh i thought they were making a biopic yeah he fights bushman but no he was really problematic so remember like in iron man uh terence howard

played Iron Man's friend and then Iron Man 2 Don Chiel, yeah, yeah he was like all, he's like, it doesn't matter they all look the same. Whoa, shit. Seriously? Yes, he said that, yeah.

He also, he was like, he hated Black Widow. He was like, we cannot make a Black Widow movie. He didn't even know she was white. Like, and they eventually got rid of him around like Iron Man Tree. Okay.

Yeah, so, but like he's still like, he still makes, I think he still owns Marvel Toys. Right, right. And he still donates loads of money to Trump. shit wow interesting yeah so that's a bit

just a Marvel minnie that was good no yeah you're right that did win me over to be in pro Marvel yeah yeah

I now love Marvel you watch Spider Man yeah I like Spider Man yeah I like Spider-Man I do like Spider-Man that's fine yeah no that's good I get it

do you not like Spider-Man I got nothing against Spider-Man I liked the original Spider-Man with Toby McGuire the Sam Ramey ones I liked the animated series but again when I was a kid like I just don't

I haven't I'm in my 30s now those movies are for grown-up those movies kids don't have sophisticated enough brains sure yeah yeah yeah I don't know there's a lot of stuff going on three spider man's a child couldn't understand that all spider man's

look alike yeah but no it's good I'm glad that Marvel are doing so well good for Marvel should we do conspiracy corner before we had all yeah yeah what time we had to go on there we're almost at an hour there we do conspiracy corner have you got anywhere to be

no we're literally no good good first thing that's happened to me in months So, have you Sandy Hook Woo! Yeah, okay, right This comes up a lot of here. No, we've never talked with Sandy Hook

And I never mean that interest in it Because I always thought it was kind of like A lame kind of like It seemed like there wasn't much there There wasn't much meat on the bone. I don't even know exactly the conspiracy is that it just didn't happen at all It's the crisis actors one, isn't it?

Yeah, and no kids died. But it's weird. So like a lot of conspiracy theories you go like Oh, it's silly, who cares? This one seemed to really strike a cold. where people were like, you're gone too far here. Yeah, well, basically what ruined Alex Jones. Exactly.

Still getting sued over it, like, you know? Yeah. There's people still annoying the parents over it. They're still going through the parents' bins and stuff. That's the thing with it is that it is like, I think it jumps to a whole new level of conspiracy theories where it used to be like, oh, the government planned this. And then this went to like all of these kids that you saw died, didn't actually die. Yeah.

Like that is like a whole new level. And then like, let's harass the parents. because they're full of it, full of bowling. Because like, and all their stuff is like, okay,

the parents crying, okay, but if you freeze frame it, it kind of looks like they're smiling, so, there. It's weird,

though, Alex Jones now is like, he had that documentary made about him, and he's like, yeah, and he was on, like,

the Red Scare podcast. He's really trying to, like, he's really going to any avenue that will take him. Yeah, pretty much.

He's kind of, obviously he's done Rogan a bunch. He was on the, Andrew Schultz's one. But again, I mean, they're laughing at them. That's the thing. No, they full

on, like, get him a bottle of whiskey, get him to take his shirt off and let's all laugh at him. It is quite, like, if that was a girl, you'd be like, you know, you get in trouble because it's Alex Jones, like, yeah, we got him all fat and greased up, we spit on him. Yeah, you're right. Alex Jones is the real victim. Yeah, it's like a drunken college girl.

Like a girl in euphoria, just stumbling around. He will be dead within five years, I reckon, though, just like, from a heart attack. No, he's strong, man, he's strong. Yeah, but man, he's got so many people coming after him and he's losing all his money and he's So I thought though So you make fun Alex Jones

But I thought I'm going to try convince you A Sandy Hook with Sandy Hawks Yes Let's see if I can convince you Okay So let's start off the beginning Newtown That maybe Newton

Wherever it happened Okay Newton Newton okay Was before the shooting It was known for their mental hospital Okay Where they did strange experiments

On patients including children Oh Yeah Mind experiments lobotomies and worse Kind of like MK Ultra type shit

Exactly yeah In fact it was so well known That was mentioning movies Really? Yeah Yeah Like what movies I remember

I remember the movie Where Robin Williams Couldn't go sleep The Fisher King No it was like Awakenings Was that? The Wakenings

Was that? Is that Robert De Niro That's it Yeah Yeah yeah They mention it in that Okay Yeah he's like

He's like the doctor He's like He's trying to help De Niro De Niro can't sleep Yeah some shit Okay yeah in a few other movies as well.

Okay, so, okay, so this place. And there's lots of underground tunnels and stuff as well. Really? Yeah, underneath the hospital. Like, a lot of shady shit happened there. A lot of the doctors involved in that, obviously because it's a small town. Like, they also got involved with like Sandy Hook stuff, all right? Okay.

Isn't that the kind of place that would also fuck people off enough to massacre a bunch of people, though? Oh, well, who knows? Who knows what's going on in those tunnels? Sorry, sorry, I don't want to interrupt before you finish your case. Yeah, the second part, okay? You know who lives near Sandy Hook? Who? the girl who wrote The Hunger Games

Now, what's the Hunger Games about? Children dying for people's entertainment And it's all the show Wow Wow, you're not wrong That is a loose thread, baby That is... Well, this will get you, okay?

That is reaching Remember the movie Dark Night Rises? Do I ever? In the Dark Night Rises, they show maps, okay Maps of America And in the map, you can see Sandy Hook What?

Yeah, you can see Sandy Hook in The Dark Night Rises. What are you on about? What is it? Wait, is that actually, because Chris Nolan directed Awakenings as well,

didn't he? No, he didn't. No, he did Insomnia. Oh, yeah, that's it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, uh, good, that's good,

though, yeah. It's a good attempt. I could say that and let it in their own fortune and they'd believe me. They would, that's the thing that they would actually like,

okay, I'm sorry, where are you getting all this? What's your sources, brother? A documentary called, we need to talk about Sandy Hook.

I remember that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's got taken down now, but you can still find it. I found it on the cool, like, website, yeah. Fucking, uh... Yeah, they don't want you to know. You have to do a special handshake for letting you in the website. I had to join the Shriners, but it was worth it.

Is this website just some guy's basement? Yeah, it is, yeah. With, like, one little light that flickers, okay? He's also the zodiacular. Okay, so... So, on to the thing, okay? Yeah. So, it happens, right?

Quotation marks. If you're gullible enough to believe it. many people in Fallen Sandy Hook were also involved in entertainment in the entertainment industry. Like high up, okay? So one woman involved, okay? Yeah.

Her kids got killed. Right. She did a voice in the animated aliens movie that got released on DVD. Okay. Okay, yeah. So we're talking about the upper echelons.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah. Tom Cruise shit, okay. Another one, okay. She, no, it was it was a he, okay, I think. He was in, like,

taking an episode of Law and Order? SWU or was he kicking it with Sam Waterson? Because that puts a whole different spin on it. I'm not too sure. And then another guy played guitar in a local bar. Yeah, so all Hollywood elites. Probably sold Mac Miller, the bad shit. These were all like high invite teas on Epstein's

Island. So what they're thinking is kind of like illuminati blood sacrifice type shit. Exactly, yeah. This is all fake. Okay. All the kids, okay, they're all all right and if there's a Super Bowl ad and they're all in the Super Bowl ad

all the dead kids are in a Super Bowl ad undercover but it's like a cast party like a reunion party and you can see them in the background of it like an ad for like Budweiser that came out after the

yeah yeah yeah just to really rub at your face yeah be so great now if there's like a Goonies remake and it's just all the Sandy Hook kids do the truffle or turns out of the kids was justy small it or something

okay so all right what about the kid the shooter adam lanza what's his dealio um did they go into that not really he's just a mental guy yeah right he doesn't really give a shit about one thing one argument that I heard

yeah you join in yeah okay the one thing I heard you know as being used as evidence was the fact that he was like this really really scrawny kind of weakling but he had like an ars of weaponry that would have been very difficult for even a guy

of my size to carry around but he's such a scrawny weakling and like how many kids did he kill he got some reason a lot of these shootings the shooter is incredibly good yeah like almost like executioner like it's in exactly where it should go I was just out of shooting

range there over the weekend I was a stag yeah yeah yeah but that was my first time now I'd shot rifles before because I grew up in a farm so it's easier to be more accurate with a rifle, with a handgun, very difficult to be accurate. Like, unless you're properly, you know, trained or whatever the fuck. Now, again, that is my first time ever shooting a handgun, but, yeah, it's fucking tricky, like, you know.

Yeah, a lot of these ones, they seem to, like, always, very few misses, you know, it seems to be very, like, skilled. Very, yeah, yeah. In his diaries, he considered him, he was worried he might be a paedophile. Really? Yeah, yeah, he said that, like, he liked, look, but he seemed a bit worried about it, though. It wasn't, like, oh, like, kids, and this is awesome. he was like I'd be guessing now

20s yeah something like that was he just a cycle or was he part of any like thing like an insal or a fucking terrorist I don't think he graduated that yet

but he probably would have been if he didn't because this is like 2012 so it's still kind of like 4chan and Reddit I don't even think 8chan was around yeah

I don't know when the in cell thing properly took off even if it was a thing it would have been a niche thing yeah yeah the van shit hadn't happened yet though what's there you know in Canada the in cell like went

to like he was like none of these women will have sex with me so I'm going to go to their I can never do anything right so I'm going to go kill them in their sorority house and he went to their sorority house and fucked up killing them oh Elliot roger yeah yeah he was mostly like Asian guys as well yeah but he was Asian he like

but he thought that he was like better than most Asian guys because his dad was white yeah he's like his dad was like a big producer in Hollywood but yeah he's like manifest though got leaked. Hollywood again? He put up this video or he's like,

I am the supreme gentleman and these women will that fuck me and he was a good looking guy as well. That's the thing. He was pretty hot. He was hot and a rich kid whose dad was famous basically

and he still couldn't get. It was just testament to what an insufferable little douchebag he must have been. He probably had very high standards though. He was like, you know, he was trying to be like Pete Davis he was like,

he was like a fuck have a bank in Kardashian and kill him all. That's the thing is all those guys are just like all. these hot women only want to fuck hot guys why don't they fuck a nice guy like me and it's like why don't you just fuck a not insanely hot woman and they're like

ew that's gross start off with Larry David's daughter and work your way up you know and so you do it I was going to say they are very George like George today would be pure in cell like oh yeah George got mad pussy I know but he was never happy that's thing he couldn't smell the roses

yeah yeah he'd be afraid today he'd be like dating this really hot woman but he'd have gone on to an in cell farm and he'd been like She wants to fuck a chat, Jerry. Jerry! Not a chat. So what else about Sandy Hook now? A lot of it is just

freeze frames as like the parents. And you know the way like, because people expect them to be like, it's like Hollywood like, oh hoo-hoo. Yeah, sure, yeah. I'm not, you know. That's what I'd be like if my kid died.

Same in like court cases. The jury always wants the bad acting. Yeah. Okay. But in reality, though, you're just kind of like so stunned. you're like, well, you're like, probably just on like 12 volume

just to get through the day because your child has just been murdered. Yeah, and so like they got like, you know, there's like nine guys with like basically TMZ style of your kid's dead, are you sad? Like, they might do like like, huh. Yeah, I'm sad.

And there's like that hook. They're like, oh, they're. Yeah. They're laughing. They're rubbing in our faces. They're mocking us. Yeah. There's one guy that,

don't be mean here, but they're like, he's a guy who like, but also like some of people like their story doesn't add up and it's obviously like because like their sons just died yeah

and it's like little things like oh I was in the house and heard and they're like oh I was outside the house when I heard like little things like that say uh wait what was that

you said he was in is there like a weird annoying voiceover guy yeah exactly those guys can convince me of anything yeah yeah one second

are you telling me yeah uh well that's weird because I thought you just said what's it like being a lying bitch but that guy's so sassy he must be right

there's an amazing bit the documentary where some mental cunt like a real Karen okay calls up like the chief

of police and area and she's like why won't you admit it admit it you faked it you have to tell me

he's like I miss I don't have to tell you anything you don't have to tell me anything you have I'm your master and he goes like no I'm the master

and she goes so you admit you think you're the master do you and then the narration goes so as we can see

here they think their their our masters yeah and he keeps saying that in a

documentary in our so-called masters oh wow that's great she sounds awesome yeah I bet she's like

riding a sack you know yeah it's the kind of girl you want to give 800 euro to

oh yeah just a racist insane lady that's what I need yeah nice do role play and it's like

I'll be Adam Vanzah tonight I'm gonna murder that pussy I'm gonna pretend your pussy's a four year

old child What? Let's not think about it too much. They were that young though, right? You can't get it up and it's just a hoax, the whole thing. They were like proper like five, six years old. Yeah, real, real small, yeah. You don't know how many he killed?

Oh, I forget now. It was, it was bad. It was, but yeah, it was. I'm going out of the limb here. Any of these things I can never, because there's just are so many fucking shooting. It's hard to remember which is which. It is, but apparently also like Alex Jones.

Yeah. Works to CIA. I've heard that. Yeah. He's a shill, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he... That actually could see, I would well believe that. He was, you know, but he was going after Sandy Hook parents?

Yeah. That was to make us feel sorry for those greedy parents. Oh, right, okay. To make us feel sympathy for them. I actually, I kind of respect the fact that they've gone that extra step. It's like, Alex Jones isn't mental enough. He's actually, he's corporate. We're the real conspiracy people.

There's another funny bit where, like, they interview one guy who, like, he just lived near the school. And he's like, you know, he's, as they say, he's camp, okay? All right. Let's be honest here. He's a big camp. But they're like, look how theatrical he is, obviously acting. Right, right.

I was like, have you, oh, do you think all gay people are acting? Yeah. All gay people are kind of crisis actors. Like, is this like a rap party for something? Look at all these crisis actors in the George. Fair City rap party? I don't know, yeah. They seem to have gone so insane though now that surely it's going to like,

combust itself because once they think that Alex Jones is an actor too then they're gonna be like wait is that lady who called the cops and called her mask

is she an actor am I an actor there's no fun stuff there's not on juke it's all like so it's all stuff like the hunger game shit

where it's like oh can't you see so yeah yeah there's nothing that really grabs you yeah there's no like well actually there was like

fingerprints on a on a different gun that like found there's no like kind of like smoking gun literally

There's nothing like that grabs you None of the conspiracy theories are any good anymore COVID is such a boring one Yeah, COVID sucks Wuhan Lab fine And what It's the crazy thing It's like oh it was invented in a lab

That they make viruses in It's like oh well That one is also But probably true Yeah, yeah That's what I mean But there's no like It's not like

What the hell The Queen was there at the same time There's not unlike the Prince Andrew was doing that as well Yeah I know the Sandy Hook when that happened, that's the reason that Jim Carrey denounced

kick ass two. You remember that? I think Jim Carrey was just looking for a reason to denounce kick ass too. It was like, oh yes, a bunch of kids died. Yeah, this movie's terrible and I want nothing to do with it. That would be great if it was a hoax, but it was just Jim Carrey trying to distract from his poor box office. Do not go in there.

Woo! Yeah, remember that? He just pulled out, said like, yeah, just guns this movie and this is what causes Sandy Hook. than the rest of the cast if you're like well you know we have to respect

Jim Carrey's opinions but you should see in cinemas because it's a rocking good time yeah oh god fuck Jim Carrey

yeah fuck Jim Carrey yeah and I loved Jim Carrey as a kid but you know Jimry

when he was on Bill Mar and they'd just done that like Colin Kaepernick Nike campaign and he did that full thing

where he's like oh I'm just here wearing my Nike runners and then he did a big dance in his Nike's oh no

I didn't see that what message is there now well he's in Sonic 2 now sweatshops are cool um yeah but sandy hook so yeah that's really all i have let me see if there's anything i forgot but it's very tangential stuff as far as i know adam lands is still alive though like he didn't die like a lot of these kind of mass shooters it's always a turned the gun on themselves situation but i don't think he did is he in jail i assume so or in some kind of facility somewhere but like we've never seen or heard any

more from him but you like he was well documented to be very very mentally ill and unstable even looking at him like I don't want to sound yeah no but you're right though you look at him as like oh he's got like a bowl cut like and he's like a long

face and just like they pick like the worst photo of him possible like it looks like real gloomy guss you know it was like that when OJ was on the cover of Time magazine they're like they're going to colour correct Adam Lanz's face to make him more white you know the wider he

is the eviler he is. That's actually fucking wild that they did that though for the other thing. Did they do that? For OJ yeah they kind of darkened his like skin tone Jesus Christ. Yeah it's pretty fucked up to make him look scarier. Yeah. Yeah you always forget because he like did

do it like how fucking racist everybody involved in that one. Yeah pretty much. Yeah. Um because that's how he got off isn't it? The cop was like super racist. Yeah. Mark Furman. They referenced him to the Marvel movie. Yeah. and we're back

the whole this was all Marvel Minute yeah yeah it's the best Marvel Minute ever

it's Mark Furman versus Bushman now next week it's gonna be the Mark Furman

hour well it was pretty cool like the Falcon reference him in a Captain American movie

he's like who are you Mark Furman and it's like how many kids watching they're like oh yeah

you got him Falcon to be fair you probably kid Brian I stood up yeah standing own

well like I mean they're kind of they're not even made for kids anymore it's like for everyone they are made for man children

yeah yeah yeah much like basically like conspiracy theory stuff like it's yeah I get way more entertainment

out of conspiracy theories than a Marvel good ones though good ones the only good thing about the documentary was they show a lot of Fox News stuff

all like the hot Fox News girls sure that was the only kind of entertaining it was like Megan Kelly, yeah. Yeah. But that was, that was really

the only kind of stuff I got from it. It, uh, didn't really, I didn't want to harass the parents afterwards. Yeah.

That's the worst review I can give it. Yeah. They had to start up their own organization now. I think it's called like horn. Something like that the parents. What's it stand for? Oh, I don't know.

Like home, horny. I don't know what it is, okay. But basically it's to like, um, an organization to stop people and like to see, counter sue people who like,

try to like accuse them of like try to libel them and that's basically what's happening to Jones like basically every parent or like they're all taking their own libel cases against them so he's just got like he's gonna they're gonna drain all of his money till there's nothing left

Jones had to come out and say it was psychosis oh yeah after the fact like but uh yeah I don't know I would like to watch that documentary if he didn't make it I would be very interested to see him through somebody else's lens there's a great I can't find on YouTube anymore is a great John Ronson documentary about him

Oh, secret rulers of the world Yeah, have you seen that? I've seen the bit where he like sneaks into Bohemian Grove And like there's like that kind of body cam footage Yeah But it's like really grainy and shitty But it's a bunch of dudes and robes And they're burning an effigy of Moloch the Owl

It's like it's just rich people being weird And kind of you know There's a great bit in it now I might be misremembering it But I'm pretty sure There's a bit in it where like they're getting ready to sneak in so they're pretending to be like

normal people just like hey how you doing yes it's good and it's like so weird and like comical but they don't intend it to be comical yeah yeah yeah yeah oh how you doing that's a good golf golf is good yes

yes yeah that's secret rulers of the world but like I don't know I don't uh it was channel 4 it was back when he was a novelty like yeah yeah yeah he was in a lot of kind of like early link later films as well Yeah, yeah

Like he was in Waking Life and Scanner Darkly that I was talking about earlier downstairs Well, around Austin he's been known for so long Yeah He was like on public access

Alex Jones As in yeah Yeah He was in Linklider movies Yeah But like kind of So They're both

He was meant to be The McConaughey part That's what I love About these high school girls I tell you Oh Because they're crisis actors But I'm really underage

It's not a crime Ah yes I'll tell you what now We're over an hour How about we hop on to the Patreon Okay Yeah Straight away

Let's do this And we get a little reckless This was us Yeah This is You know Now I can say the real wild Yeah

I'm gonna hold them back In this one I was pretending like Yeah it's a silly conspiracy theory And the Patreon I'm like Dude you don't understand Look I've got all of their parents' numbers

Let's call them up now That would be great We just do like the Russell Brown And if I can call to crisis after this. Is your refrigerator, Rodding? Yeah, well, your child's alive, you lying home. That be stuff we call up Andrew Sachs. It's like, oh, your granddaughter is still alive.

A fact of Gwen daughter here in Sandy Hook, it was willing. I put my cookie walk in her face. Yeah, so you got a hand to plug. Plug it again. Plug it all. Yeah, yeah. So Sugar Club Come see it

That's the worst plug ever Sorry It's a comedy show Like event bright Where I get tickets Yeah you can get tickets on the Sugar Club website There'll be links in my bio

On Instagram as well At Tal and Matthew And we got a great lineup We got like Shane Daniel Bern Justine Stafford A bunch of hilarious I show Daniel Byrne In an ad for something

He's in a shower They're all doing fucking ads It's so depressing All the like best comedians Are just doing ads They should have their own shows So I'll get in a shower Yeah, yeah

Give me the odd shit No, yeah He's doing really well for himself though He's crushing it And then just like hysteria Every Friday and Sunday At the chinet Yeah

For aluminium tims Yeah aluminium tims Is gonna be on It's gonna be once a month I don't know when We're starting back yet Because the restrictions and everything But you guys will be on again

Daly yeah So people should come see you too I've got loads of new stuff Yeah All with Sandy Hook and Marvel I'm doing a live Marvel Minute Well you guys

We tried to do the live podcast that time Yeah You know what That was bad Because like we shouldn't have Like we just did a movie I think was the bad That was a bad idea

That's the funny thing It's like we should have got you on As well We were like You just kind of invite us on We're like okay thanks now Well you guys were really funny We didn't get an audience for you

Yeah Look everyone's at fault Yeah We had such a fucking, by the end of that thing that me and James ran, it was so embarrassing the audiences that we were getting. It was like, look like, look like, turn around.

Yeah, yeah. You know, what's funny is a guy actually like, because I was like, oh, we're doing a live podcast and I think a guy kind of expected him a work. He's like, oh, that's deadly. It was in, oh, yeah, will there be tickets left? And I was like, oh, yeah, I might be able to get you two, yeah. I might get you on the guest list.

What are you going to do for me? Yeah, yeah. As my robe opens up. But then, like, he showed up, And he was like, kind of looking around like, is this the, is this the party before? That's why we stopped because we were getting that reaction way too often. We managed to convince one like big American comic who was doing Vodafone to come by. I'm re-telling me this, yeah.

She was like one of the writers of the second Borat movie. Oh, wow. And we convinced her to come by. And then she came and there was just my brother and his two friends were the entire audience. And she, we had like, we thought it would be funny because she was American. and we got her like uh like you know lecois that like shitty tonic water it's like some lanky thing that like americans drink uh and we were like presenting it to her as like a local delicacy from america to like welcome her here yeah yeah and she thought that we had like set up the whole thing

as some like hoax prank to like fuck with you come out dress as boreat it's very nice did she take it well believe you not she didn't she did not. She did the gig and she did the whole thing like looking at me and James just giving us the fucking evil stare. Did she do a lot of American references that no one would get? It was all

it was around the time that Aziz Ansari got like a newtude and she did a lot of it was an Aziz Ansari impersonation. Oh wow well topical stuff. Well a lot of shoe polish shoes there. Wow. Feel good about that day? Your shoe polish

for Mark? Well, I feel better than what you said later on that we're going to cut. What did I say? You know.

No, I can defend everything I've ever said on this podcast. That's funny though, it's just all talking about. It's funny if she's

like talking about Aziziz Azari but it's not to do with like the Me Too stuff she's like he's fucking Indian or something

and I don't like it. I didn't trust him before any odd stuff. But all right, yeah, we're going to head over the page on over. We might maybe get a coffee

before hand. I was thinking yeah, I might get some tea. Yeah, well, maybe you know if you want anything else

we'll give you something yeah yeah yeah pick your poison some lean yeah yeah I don't get you all fucked up yeah yeah

have you ever done this podcast like hammered not really because I'm always like driving somewhere I've had a couple of beers or like smoked some weed

I've had some adderall in my house we could take that yeah you go to your house I'll keep I'm bored yeah

I'll keep I'm like then we'll really get to the bottom of sannieho once we've all done some fucking riddle

all right yeah okay so thank you Matthew Talon for joining us yeah and thank you Brian for finally telling us the truth about Sandy Hook yeah and thank me so I was trying to tell the Indian one about this while you were fuckinger missionary had to keep it interesting somehow

yeah it's the only thing keeping me hard right let's head off you're closer you hit the button oh well can you reach it is it the square one this one okay hey everyone bye catch us on the page Patreon.