Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Episode 151 : Stealing Cheese from a Prostitute

Episode Date: March 20, 2022

Back in the day when racists knew how to dance

What up? Yo, it's your boy, it's Jimmy Ked, the third, you heard. We're coming alive with it right now. This is a very special episode, okay? Is it? This is the Oscar special, part one. I'm glad I broke out my appropriate title for such an elegant event. Yeah, so this is the Oscar's about.

The Oscars are coming up. I don't know when, but they are coming up. They've announced the winners. I've watched some of the... The winners? No, the nominations. Oh, okay, yeah. The big bit of a difference between those two things, Brian.

I've fucked up. If this is going to be an Oscar special. Yeah, we're very good hosting the Oscars. The following winners are all winners in my eyes. Wait, is this, are we, is this Patreon? This is free. Oh, this is free. Yeah, this is the free episode.

Oh, mind my P's and Q's. This is the free episode. We should start off actually, so it's an Oscar special. All right. Talking about the Oscars, all the films that have been nominated. But before that, a bit of promotion. Oh. We got something promote.

This is breaking news. I never, he never tells. I have told you this, yeah, yeah, yeah, what's up? We're doing a live show. That's right. The first live show, we've got two coming up. We'll announce the first one first. We won't tell them about the second one.

Yeah, yeah. Leave that surprise. You're the, you're the marketing way. The first one first. So, yeah, we're doing a live show in the Haypenny. Yes, the Haypenny Bridge in. On the 24th of April. Right, that's a Sunday.

Yeah, you said Sunday. Did I? Well, we were given. I think the options were Tuesday or Sunday and you said Sunday so if all goes to shit It's my fault

Yeah Well I'm just going to assume Like it's the end of the weekend So you'll still have like The really sad, depressed Alcoholic dads Who refuse to go home To their cunt wife and kids

Then they'll come Check out the BJ boys live Bring the cunt wife Bring the kids Bring the cunt kids Okay They'll love it It'll bring you back together

It'll make the relationship Stronger That's right yeah So it's gonna be a live show I've got lots of things planned. I'm not going to tell you, but I've got lots of special things planned. It's going to be...

James, you are not the father. Oh, yeah! Yeah, that's right, that's right. We're going to have, to keep the energy up, because the problem is we might start to lose the energy. Especially, you know, the way sometimes we don't like each other. It gets worse for this people around. Yeah, it sure does.

So it's going to be a rotating series of guests on the show, okay? I'm not going to announce them yet, but we'll have guests on the night and they're going to all get on stage in turns, and we're going to banter with them and have the crack. Create the illusion of friendship and prosperity.

Yeah, but then when the show ends, okay, oh, it gets dark. That's right, yeah. You know, in Blade, remember the nightclub scene in Blade? Yeah. It's going to be nothing like that. Okay.

It's going to be way gayers of that. But I'm not going to pay my taxes. Yeah. Also, I want to have a thing with, I don't know yet, but I do want to have some kind of game element and some kind of punishment. Oh.

Yeah. If anyone's a dog collar, that might be fun. So, like, as in lead them around in a dog collar? No, no, one of the electric ones.

Oh, okay, wow. And then they shock me if I lose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get very squid games on this right now. I doubt you'll agree to it, but I will.

Regardless of the podcast aspects. I don't, I don't think I'd enjoy the shock collar now. Well, how would you want to get punished? Because you want to get punished.

Okay. You're sticking in my age. I don't know. Slap me, spit on me. You can spit in your mouth. Yeah. Yeah. Come spit in my eyes.

Hey, that's an open invoice. The Brian and James live show Club Spitting My Mouth Yeah, so we're going to iron out all the details And start making posters and shit Yeah, yeah, yeah Have you ever stolen anything?

Sure What have you stolen? I stole them from a prostitute twice Really? Yeah, not in big Just your jizz back out of her snatch Sticking in your pockets Not big, not like her fridge, right?

Just I stole, I didn't even steal fishing, I did take her panties once Oh, hello Yeah That was more just like It was just like I was putting my Get my clothes together

And it's kind of like Yeah I just accidentally wound up my pocket Is this my leopard Prince G-string And then I accidentally sniffed it On the drive home What was the other thing you stole?

I remember this is years ago I was very young naive now There was a prostitute I went to see her And then she went to the shower Beforehand Yeah And there was like a thing

On the table that I thought they were sweets Right But it turns out You know those things that were cheese They looked like sweets No Oh baby bells

Yeah there were baby bells Oh right So I took some baby bells from her And I was all like I was like oh The taste even sweeter now I found out it was cheese And it was like

Oh I've learned my lesson Never steal cheese from a prostitute No of course not So those are the two things I've stolen I also steal Pokemon cards Not we'll steal Like steal

From other kids Like Not even just a friend of mine He had loads of Pokemon cards Yeah I took some, but I knew not to take the cool ones. Yeah, take the shitty dud ones that he wouldn't miss. Again, it wasn't even for, like, I want this car.

It's like, oh my God, go away with it. I can steal anything. Ocean's 11. Hey, you, give me your bike. Yeah, I stole lots of stuff. I used to shoplift all the time. I never shoplifted. I used to do it.

I tell you what was really good one. Like, when I was going to college in Dublin, like, you know, every week, I'd come home on the weekends, right? so the Eastons and Bus Saras I used to fleece that place man Now this is like 10 years ago So what are you taken from Easton? Oh man my whole My whole trip on the bus back home

So I'm usually hung over and broke Because it's like a Friday morning or whatever I've been like drinking all week or whatever So you know Sandwich Packet of Crisps grab a drink Sometimes a magazine as well Oh magazine That seems sweeter

That's pretty Because they're like seven quaint It's like I'm not being seven quid for the fucking magazine. How do you do her? See, the thing about the Aesons, I don't know if it's still like this, but back then the layout was such a way

that you could sort of, there was a little corner where the kind of magazine shelf was and next to it was the drinks fridge. That was obscured from view of the counter. And like, it would be so busy in there in a Friday, the place to be packed. So I just, you know, I'd have a, I had a system. I had big pockets, big baggy clothes, you know?

Yeah, it was pretty, I was a dab hand of the old choplifting You have a gun Every time before And you were sweating Like this is only the last one man What else

When I was in the band We stole a PAS system From a community hall These are big steals Yeah Yeah We This isn't cheese

We used to steal kegs as well Out of the A keg We used to steal kegs To like bring them to like Gaff parties We used to like I mean I was a

I was a novice In comparison To some of the people I grew up with. Like, that kid in there, woo! Oh, really? He was another level, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not dropping names, but... I can infer. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But no... It's more about Pinaz, isn't it? Yes. Pazazaz, or one of those words. It's just like, you know, fuck. Well, one thing is like, I have... It was a recession. It was a recession. The... The Lehman Brothers screwed us all, Brian. I'm in money in there on the door. It's like, oh, those hedge-fund bastards that Bernie made up.

he fucking screwed me so we had no money what am I gonna do get a job no way man I was too busy smoking synthetic cannabinoids

and sniffing methadrone you know but I see how we would just steal shit because we had no money and it was fun yeah I need to steal more well it's kind of it's good

it's fine I think I'm at the right age to start stealing like Winona Ryder yeah yeah no he used to steal a lot like I don't do it anymore though just because like

yeah well I'll tell you what I've put on a lot of weight I'm a lot bigger now so I can't slip in you know I can't yeah exactly

I'm not very like dainty I'm just like sweat and slobber over get me guys like that like a retort Lehman Brothers

Enron God damn Edron yeah so I don't steal anymore also I'm in my 30s now it's pretty you know

yeah anyway Let's go on to the Oscars. Okay, sorry. So, that was a nice diversion there, but let's get to the real shit now, okay, the Oscars. So I watch some Oscar movies. You can pick now. So it's like you're in charge.

Right. Okay, so I watch... The illusion that I'm in charge. Here you go. Yeah. Much like the government, the illusion of change, you know? I'm your Obama. Yeah.

This is the Libson Treaty, if that's the name of it. The Caton Deception. Hello there. Welcome. Listen to the Brian and James podcast. I like to bomb children in Yemen Oh shit Speaking of presidents

Okay Former presidents This is a very good link now Okay So I'm listening to a podcast At the moment called Big Brother Okay

And it's all about Kim Jung Numb What? Kim Jong Numb All right Numb Okay When was he

The brother of Un Okay And the son of ill Yeah Yeah So there's Nom Who's brother's on Whose daddy's ill

And he was ill Now he's Gion So it's really good I've only listened to one episode But you remember the whole thing Where he got killed? No So Kim Jong-Num

Was the oldest of the family All right So he should have inherited it Right But instead he was like Fuck this I want to gamble He did a Chet Hanks

Like I'm gonna drop my mix tape He was y'all ain't ready He was Korean Chet Hanks Yeah He's our white boy summer What? That doesn't really For a lot of reasons

So instead of like Doing the whole like running the government and all that. He liked the red light district, flashing the cash, nice cars, he liked Drake. You know,

he like Western shit. Yeah, a lot of them do, you know? Yeah, well, I'm sure O'Neill love basketball and shit as well, you know?

According to that Seth Rogen movie. Yeah, yeah. So even, a numb, okay, he even liked comedians making fun of his dad.

Really? Yeah. Okay. He'd publicly like you on, like Facebook. Oh, You know, LOL. Are they allowed to use Facebook in North Korea?

Well, here's the thing. A lot of people think North Korea is completely cut off. Okay. It's cut off people like us. Yeah. The shit munchers, okay? Oh, right. Yeah.

Well, if you're above a certain level, you're basically got free reign. Really? Yeah. Yeah, you can fly back and forth all the time if you're at that level. Yeah. Also, there's a lot of North Korean money around the world. Yeah. That, like, they might act like we don't need them.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they've got a lot of companies that, like, might not be technically on the books of North Korea. Korea, but they are. Kind of like the oligarchs of Putin. Sure. No, yeah, like, it's kind of like

the perception, especially here in the West, it's like, oh, the evil North Koreans, we have nothing to do with them, but then, you know, follow the money, man. And you'll see that,

oh, there's actually a lot of crossover between Halliburton and Lockheed Martin and bloody pingling junk, whatever the fuck. You're all right. They're all ancient bloody Korean barbecue, aren't they? Lying bastards.

uh yeah but i yeah he's just quoting new york times okay wow seymour harsh is really this is his best work you know finally speaking for the people but there's a lot of north korean businesses apparently in like um china okay it's real kind of undercover in china a lot even the chinese don't know about it but in like a lot of african countries especially the ones you've ever even heard of like south africa oh right yeah yeah they've like very publicly just pumping money to them and they're like um some of the companies like one was like they make like fences

they make barbed wire fences all dark stuff like one one makes land mines oh right yeah another one makes like body bags all your bad vibes yeah bad juju so I'm listening to this

it's very good but there's two ads play in the middle of it all right and I swear to God it's where my mother's life okay even though that means nothing to me

but swear to God the first one okay It's like, y'all, who's ready for this year? Do you like Wilden Out? Listen to the women of the Wilden Out podcast. Oh, wow. Yeah, we're just girls chilling, talking about love, comedy, and black girl magic. It's going to be cray craye, yeah.

The next ad, okay, is, hi, I'm Bill Clinton. For years, people have been asking me questions. Now it's time I ask the questions. Oh, yes. Come listen to me on the Wilden Add. Ladies' podcast, man. So, yeah, Bill Clinton has a podcast now.

That's awesome. That is awesome. Where he interviews popular figures. I don't even, haven't even, I only heard it, like, driving up here. Alan Dershowitz. I mean, you were there, Bill. You know, I never did anything. These girls come in here

and with their little dresses. Actually, yeah, let me look up right now what his podcast is. So, it's why am I telling you this? Oh. Not a great name. Imagine, though, it's just pure fucking, like, all right, man, here's what happened.

Yeah, I knew they were under it. I fucked the shit out of them, man. Had so many cocks going in, they look like a fucking porcupine, baby. Yeah. I don't know any of these people. Yeah. So, his first episode,

Apollo, oh, no. Okay. Carl Weathers. Okay, Chelsea Clinton, I know her. Oh, yeah. Michael Murphy Mike Murphy No it's not Mike

Not from RTE No no but there is like a Mike Murphy Like was like a He was like in Congress or whatever No this guy he's an architect Oh okay Paul Farmer No

Something about health equality Yeah And then Bernard Henry LeVey Oh this is great This is great content here Yeah yeah It isn't fun Wow you're okay

Well like imagine I'm talking to Eddie Murphy The fun we could have had with that And he's like, Mike Murphy, Eddie Farmer. What? I thought you're talking to cool people. At least get like Bruce Springsteen or someone. Cardi me.

I'm so happy, but is it wet right now? Is it always wet? Maybe that's the thing, man. You know. Yeah. So that's the Bill Clinton podcast. I'm going to listen to all that and I'll get back to you. Please do.

That's my new mission. Yes. No time for sleep. Yeah, yeah. Because you know the last time I said I'm hallucinating? Oh, yeah. How's that all going? Well, it's not helping.

It's not, because I keep listening to podcast. Yes. I got to listen to the Num Chung Dunn. Have you, you quit your job, too? I have you. Yeah, yeah, we're talking about that on the Patreon. Okay.

This is what he, don't worry, folks. He's doing fine. This is what he's spending his time on now. I've got a lot of interviews coming up. He's not spiraling at all. I will say, I'm not showing anyone under bus, okay. I had an interview with Bonkers. Yeah.

I taught went very well. I mentioned the guy we know. Okay. Who works in bonkers. won't say Rob Flynn, okay? But I won't say, like... But I won't say, you know, yeah. It's Rob Flynn, okay?

Rob Flynn, okay? Or, yeah. I did not get the job. Oh, okay. Yeah, I thought Rob Flynn would help out, but I guess... Yeah, yeah. Sounds like that opportunity got robbed on you there, Brian. Ash, a bloody jubble on jungle, is that? I was thinking that, like, it'd be funny if I call them up in the knife from my phone boot,

be like, you fuck me. You fuck me, okay? I'm already dead. I'm talking to no one because he's a fucking dead man on the other side of this line huh? Brian, are you quoting heat?

Shut up! Shut the fucking man! I'm De Niro. Broom, brum. You're not even size more, you dog. Are we talking about the Oscars? Yes, let's get it.

So I've watched some Oscar movies. Now, I've watched all of them. Right. But these are the ones that be nominated. So I watch. the power of the dog I watched Coda I've watched Dune

Dune before we talked with Dune I also watched West Side Story Oh yeah yeah yeah So those are the ones I've watched I have not watched Belfast Belfast or Nightmare Alley

Yeah Those or two haven't watched yet But I've watched most of them Yeah I mean you And I'll get around next week I'll watch Nightmare Alley Apparently Nightmare Alley is actually good I've heard good things

It's Guillermo del Toro yeah Yeah he's good or at least we have to say he is Bradley Cooper Oh yeah It's like a horror thing

Right No it's a thriller Oh There's no horror in it It's about a fake What do you call those guys He's the Dead Oh like a psychic

Or a medium Yeah he's a medium But he's a fake medium And he gets involved In a real crime And it's like William Defoe's in it And Swinton And Ron Perlman

You know You know those typical bunch Oh the sexy fuckers You know Defoe Perlman Swindon. Oh, Swindon,

you're wolf. Yeah, I, like I... Like to steal her panties. I have a fantasy about Tilda. You ever see the movie we need to talk about Kevin?

Yeah. I'm just in the bathroom like, she opens the door and I just stare right at her. I loved you in train wreck. What's Amy Schumer like in real life? Schumer's hosting the Oscars. Really?

Yeah, it's, Disgusting. No, it's three people hosting this year, okay? Don't they know she is autism? or something? What happened? She caught off her husband. That's right. Sexually transmitted Oh, yeah. What was that? What happened there? I don't know. It just stopped. I just kind of lost

all. You stopped and ducked out the window. Yeah. And the tear came out. I was like, on the... And I looked out and it's like, not even far enough that if I jumped, I wouldn't die. It was sad there. I just gave up, man. I just... It's just kind of a moment of realization just washed over. It's like, what is the fucking point

of any of this shit? Your eyes is glazed over. I felt like I had to get a pillow and kill you. I'm gone. I'm like Jack Nicholson. You're a big Indian man. I feel it's strong now, James. Anyway, now, okay. This is all gibberish.

Here we go. So what film do you want to talk about first? So it's Coda, Power of the Dog, West Side Story. Okay. And I also watched Red Rocket, which wasn't nominated. I liked that a lot.

So why do you want to talk about first? Well, hang on. Coda is about the deaf people. Yeah. You said it was shit. Deaf cunts. Yeah. He hated that film.

Good. And people are all like, it's a magical, life-affirming movie about love and parents and disability and overcoming disability not letting disability affect you and it's so beautiful

and it's all shit okay but they're just a bunch of deaf people who work on a boat yeah so it's Coda means child of deaf adults yeah yeah yeah so it's I don't understand how deafness works

so it's two deaf parents well I didn't know that I keep playing in my mixtape so the two parents yeah They're both deaf, they've produced a deaf son And a non-deaf, daughter Yeah, who's like, you know, got a year round tan And the dad's like, right, well, you're young, yeah

And the mom's, I don't know, yeah, yeah, my summer at Cancun, there's nothing to do with this. So, is that, uh, It was a racial joke there. I didn't pick up on first, didn't know what you're talking about, yeah, yeah, pretty subtle, thank you. But you have to be more blunt from me. Right, because she's black.

yeah yeah all right so um they they live in boston right and they fish all right but there's all these fishing quotas come in so they're not making enough money on the fish and also like there's these mean government people are like deaf people can't fish yeah and the whole time they're like we got to fight back so well they can they fish well are the proofs in the puddin do you saw them fish that all movie magic it's all nonsense but what is the sure you're to be like sirens and stuff to have to hear Yeah but like I don't know I think with deaf people it's like to do with say the vibrations and stuff I don't know how it works man to be honest I don't know it's like vibrations that's how they

Like when they go to a club or whatever They dance to like the beat They shouldn't be that in clubs either Oh yeah Except with a special club Yeah Club around your head You can't catfish here all right

but yeah so like so that's her whole situation but she wants to be a singer the non-deaf yeah yeah the non-deaf wants to be a singer and then her mother gets all pissy with her and it's like what she says she does sign language in it

and she says something like oh if I was blind would you become a painter oh okay so what the mom's kind of like you're only becoming a singer because I just piss us off yeah the deaf people in it are not they're not charming okay

they're pretty cunty like they're always farting oh really because deaf people they don't know like when they're farting because they can't hear it oh

and they're like they like they fuck real loud really yeah yeah like the girl the non-deaf girl brings like a boy over

not the fuck just like study okay and they're like the pair's like meh and she's like what please stop

and she has to run in and say please stop they won't stop I'm coming! I'm coming! It's pretty disturbing. I didn't like them. And even, like...

Yeah. You know, I like disabled people fucking... Well, not like that. I didn't know this was a horror movie. What is this a Cronenberg picture? It's disgusting. But even like, they bring... They force her to do shit, like,

whenever they have to go to, like, doctor's appointments, they bring her and the dad's like, you know, my balls are itchy. You know, with sign language, okay? Oh. And then she's got to say to the doctor, his testicles are itchy. And he's like, yeah, it's...

fucking burning up every time I smash my wife her pussy's burning up as well and the door has to be like her vagina is also hot from intercourse oh really is this actually in it

yeah that's actually in it as an example okay and then the doctor's like you have to stop well they got like crap not crabs they got like something

like kind of rock they got some kind of rot because they're always wearing wet clothes oh what they've got like crotch rot that's it

that is disgusting yeah so they've got that is disgusting that's what death people all have. So the doctor... That little deaf kid on Barney his ball sack was stanking.

The doctor's like, you have to stop having sex and the dad's like, you know, tell him, I need to smash. I need them thing. I need that pussy. I went to... I was in a PLC with a deaf guy and he had like a carer.

Like, you know, like, I know she would do the typing for him. Typing? She would do other shit for him. I can't really remember. It's like 10 years ago. He was very racist, I remember. You ever hear a deaf guy say the N-word? It's quite something.

It is quite something. It's almost endearing in a way. Yeah, yeah. If a deaf guy says the N-word in a forest that no one's around to hear it, is it racist? Does he still get curbstoms? My eyes are seeing the one you shoved it, and so forth, etc.

Yeah. Anyway, so... This is an official Brian and James stance fuck deaf people we don't fuck with you no more fuck those deaf people but you also have to think like different Boston's

that's probably like a bigger problem that's the bigger disability than being deaf I was joking by the way I love deaf people really nah

I only met one I heard you say the end word I gotta chuckle out of that so you know I'm doing pretty good from the deaf community they've given me a memory to cherish forever

so am I die I'm in the hospital to be like, oh, it was all worth it. That's my rose bud, you know? All right, so next film. Fuck Coda, you didn't like. I like Coda.

I watched The Power of the Dog. Right. Power of the dog's really good. This is the Western. A few things about this was Sam Elliott came out and said it wasn't a Western and it was gay. It's not really Western. It's also gay. Sam Elliott, as I knew, I never questioned him.

A man with that mustache nose. What's what's up? I mean, like, from a technical point of view, I don't know how you disagree with him. I'm talking about the dude here. And there's another dude. And guess what they're doing? Anyway, yeah, it's all right.

Go on. Yeah. Well, you see, the director then Jane Champion, then she came out and she was like, this is so weak. She was like, oh, yeah, Sam Elliott, he's a B-I-C-H. Is that it?

Yeah. And then on the internet, they're like, oh, Sam Elliott will take years to go from this burn. Yeah. Oh, Sam Elliott just got right. He should kill himself. shaves his mustache and then jumps off a bridge.

You're about a cruel world. Yeah, so she called him a bitch. And everyone for like a day was like, yes, queen, you're the best. And then she wins an award. What was that? Like critics choice or something. Some shit that no one cares about.

For some reason, fucking Serino Williams is in the crowd. Well, from King Richard. Oh, that's what it was. Sorry, okay, that makes sense. King Richard got nominated as well. I forgot about that. Good. But, um, oh yeah, and you watched that too.

I did, I like that. But yeah, but Jane Campion, she gets up there It's like, Serena and Venus, you're so wonderful. I'm in awe of you. But as amazing as you are, you never had to go against the boys like me. And I don't even remember why you, like, what was her? It came out nowhere. Yeah.

Well, yeah, and was that the thing that was she the only, like, female director nominated that year or something? I think so, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's obviously the point she was making. And they laughed. Serena Williams laughed. Yeah, because they were probably just so. whatever like I'm also aware that there's a camera on her face

so she can't be like what the fuck you fake bitch you know she's got to be like Serena's a pro she knows like smile for the camera now but later on yeah catch me outside how about that bitch a beat the shit over an alleyway exactly yeah shove a tennis racket

up or cunt and not the handle yeah so yeah but now people are kind of dragging this bitch on Twitter like you horrible racist or whatever people came out and they're really against her. Like, you know why we joke about, like, white women? Yeah.

For the first time ever, I think maybe a white woman doesn't desert. No, no. I nearly fell for a trap there. Yeah, that's it. That's a, their siren song. You know, you felt for it. They're like crashing as a rocks there. You're right, fuck her.

She's a cunt. Well, I'm sorry. This is all I'm not used to play into the same room as them, you know? I was a, a boat skeed. Yeah. No, it was a bit much. Like, for like, a harmless,

comment and they're saying this could hurt her Oscar chances now. Really? Yeah. By and this is Twitter, like nobody cares. I mean, like, yeah, again, it's fucking storming a teacup, nobody gives it. Only freaks like us are talking about it. The real world don't care. Yeah. You know, the rest of the cool kids are talking about power

of the dog, you know, the actual plot of it. You actually liked it, did you? I did like it. Yeah, what is it? Break it down for me real quick. How much you want to know? I don't know. Just the basic. Okay, I'll tell you the basic premise, okay? So it's Jesse Plemons and Benz Benedict Cumberbatch.

Nice. They play brothers, all right. But they seem to be from, like, well-to-do backgrounds, and they've decided to buy a ranch and be, like, cattle people. Is this modern day? No, no. This is, like, 186. Okay.

Okay. So they've bought a cattle ranch, okay? Yeah. And Jesse Plemons is a bit of, like, a soft boy, basically. Right, yeah, yeah. He's like, okay, you men, you know, keep doing your cattle thing, okay? Yeah, yeah. You know, to the workers.

but Benedict Cumberbatch, he embraces it full on. He loves cat of life, okay? He loves being a man. He just picks up a lump of cow shit and smears it on his face. He basically does, yeah. He castrates the bulls himself. Really? He doesn't use gloves or anything.

He loves the fucking, like, getting a nitty-gritty, okay? That's gross. He loves, like, killing animals, hunting. He's a fucking man, all right? A cool dude. Yeah. All right. But Jesse Plemons, like, a pussy, okay?

He falls in love with a woman. Oh, first. his actual wife. You've got all these cattle here and you're trying to fuck a woman? Why do you want pussy when you can cast straight bulls? Why go out,

why pay for pussy when you got the cows cunt at home? Or whatever that old say. When you can get the cows cunt for free? That's no one. Wait, it's his real life. Yeah, Kristen Dunst. Kirsten Dunst.

Kirsten Dunst, yeah. Let me just say, and I'm sure you were going to bring it up because it's on everyone's mind, but we've all seen how her titties have gotten so much bigger in later life. I haven't noticed that really. You haven't noticed that really.

Nancy boy alert. You're too busy watching the Bulls castrated. Well, how old was she in Spider-Man? Oh, like 20-odd, maybe. So maybe they got bigger. No, man, she's got it. She's had a boob job. Like, a very noticeably gigantic.

She's like, you see her now? She's like Salma Hayek, Cleavage. Well, if you want to hang on to Jesse Plemans, okay, you've got to get all the work done possible. I was telling you about Lost Liberties now, they get, like, baby teeth and also

penises like foreskins okay and they use that to stay younger they rub all that shit because the stem cells in teeth and foreskins

so you use that to like stay younger so maybe she don't use that on their tits and if you just want a two like if you want to get

two for one you you circumcised a paedophile because their foreskin has baby's teeth in it already get it

because you're sucking the dick You get it? Yeah, I got, you kind of scared me there, but I got it, yeah. Thanks, man. That's good. You should use that on stage. I will, yeah.

And threaten them. Yeah, it's like, so, have we all heard about the stem cell baby teeth, foreskin thing? Of course we have. Come on. What about Pino's, hey? They probably have lots. They're on the news recently. Okay, so.

So, Jesse Plemons, marries a woman, okay? Right. The woman already is the kid. a little twink A little 17-year-old skinny twink Wait, what? Yeah, yeah He marries a woman

Who has a 17-year-old son? What? I think so, I think 17, yeah This is back in the old times Like, girls got pregnant at 14 Yeah, okay, fair enough, alright Kristen Dunst is how old now She's probably in her 40s, I'll say

Yeah, so, it tracks, okay, especially back then Yeah, yeah So they go live on the farm together and Ben the Curnbach fucking hates her and hates the son as well he does call him a Nancy boy Oh okay

Little Lord Fag or something like that He makes some joke right And he hates them It's about the conflict there Where he kind of like wants them dead And she starts drinking a lot Because she's kind of miserable With her life

She's gonna go This is my life now What does Jesse Plemans do Is he like basically just owns the farm He runs it with his brother But Ben the Cumberbatch is the one who actually Jump fully into it And you get the sense that he's kind of gone like

I'll just do my, okay my brother wants to do this I'll just do okay That seems fun And they're just in a ranch in middle of nowhere And then it's also like Now that he's married this bitch If he dies Then she's gonna come looking for half of the land

Yeah he does not Bend the Cumberbatch is like She's only marrying you for your money She doesn't like you She's a fucking Alcoholic fucking Give me money Where I'm in need

And they break into a Yeah do they funny certain words in a song and then it gets

kind of dark and weird and you kind of find out more of Ben de Crumberbatch is weird past and he starts

to form a bond with the boy where it's almost like he's trying to turn the boy against yeah but almost like

you know I'm gonna turn you into a fucking weird cattle person that likes to kill animals you're gonna get into this

as well I'm gonna make you non-soft So yeah, because Comberbatch really enjoys like the killing animals and the mutilating And then you find out that maybe Cumberbatch when he was younger had also had a mentor

That maybe was a little bit weird with him Oh, I see And this is where Sam Elliott was proven right Interesting Yes, where there might be a predatory nature Oh, wait, so Cumberbatch is a nonce Well, it's implied That's a very loaded word

nonce, okay? I would say male friend with benefits. Okay, right. Well, I don't think even Combatts knows what he is. Right. That's why he's so angry.

The Benedict Cumber Snatch. That's why he's so, he's jumped. You'll be like I got into football recently. Yeah. It's kind of the same thing. Okay, right. Yeah, I'm just trying to push down the feelings. Of course.

And the urges I have. Yeah. So your way to combat that is just to watch athletic men in shorts Yeah, I'm just going to stare at Ronaldo until I stop being gay Maybe I could cast a ball real quick

There's a catch, the same thing So power of the dog you liked Very good, very weird I won't see any more Because I think you actually like it Yeah, to be honest I like the A lot of, I like what I'm hearing

Slow meditative There's not like a big twist It's more like a slow kind of realisation of like, oh, is it going this way? And then it didn't change it again. You're like, oh, I don't know who the bad guy is here. And Christian Stewart becomes an alcoholic. It's always fun to see a woman big tits become an alcoholic.

Kirsten Dunst. Oh, yeah, Kirsten Dunst. Who's Kristen Stewart? That's the Twilight chick. Oh, okay, all right, yeah. But she's also probably, I'd like see her as alcoholic as well. They should all be alcoholics. Yeah, yeah.

So that's power to dog. Okay, so that, would you say that was your favorite maybe? If it won the best picture, I wouldn't be surprised. Okay. It really, I don't know, it's not really a best picture film. It's not like, they can prefer more endearing stuff about, you know, like, people overcoming shit. Deaf retards trying to show fish up their cunt or whatever that movie was about. Yeah, or, you know, like Forrest Gump, you know, that kind of shit.

Exact same plot, exact same plot. All the people don't realize that. How did Bubba die? Hey, Baba, I got a new trick to show you. Damn, it's the white people's shit So I don't think I think Power the Dog might be a little bit too weird And sexual for the Oscars

For, like there's a lot old people in the academy And then I think this thing with her The director probably isn't going to help I don't think the old people are on Twitter But I think a lot of old people might be a bit weird out By the, you know Sexual and the stuff And there's no like, no good character in it

There's no like, oh, go on Jesse, save the day Yeah, yeah, okay. So, what else then? What next? Should we do West Side Story next? Yeah, I'll do that one then. So this is by Stephen Spielberg. Right, so the remake of the Stephen Soddenheim.

I think Soddenheim wrote it. I don't know who directed it. Okay. So it's West Side Story came out last year. Right. I didn't know anything about West Side Story. Yeah. It's way darker than I realized.

I've never seen the original, which was what, like the 60s. 60s? Maybe 61. I think. Of course it was on Broadway way before that. And so it's all about the Jets and the Sharks or like these street gangs. Yeah, street gangs. I didn't realize the Jets are white

and the sharks are Puerto Ricans. It's basically race war. It's musical race war. They're all jumping around dancing and say we don't like the Spicks. Yeah. They say that in the film like they don't actually sing it but do say they say a lot of racial slurs and shit. Right.

What are the Puerto Ricans call us? Sir. Yes King King Brian That's what they call me Lord Brian

The Puerto Ricans come up Oh I'm sorry Massa Brian I paid him talk like that Talk like you're the mother And Tom and Jerry Elocution lessons Hundreds of quaint

But money well spent Yeah So yeah It's like a musical And So it stars Ansel Egelthor Poor baby driver

A baby driver kid. I didn't like him in it. He's terrible. He's not good. But the fun thing is, nearerdy everyone else in it, I get to feeling they're actual Broadway people. And they're really good. I was actually kind of like, you know what we do this whole thing? Like, everything

shit. Yeah. I was kind of taken away by the magic of it. Really? Yeah, I was kind of enjoying it. Yeah. Some of the songs are pretty funny. Like, they've got the song about being white in America and how it's great. Okay. But the Puerto Ricans are like talking shit about Americans. Is it

All kind of music from the original or they... This is how musical should be. There's music and then scenes that they're not singing, and it's actual plot. Yeah. And then they sing a song. But have they, like, is all the songs from the original, like, word for word? Have they, like, re-worked it or anything like that? They haven't changed.

They've actually added a few songs. Yeah. There's a woman in... There's a new character in this movie. I think her name's like Rita, something. Right. She was the lead in the original movie. Right, okay.

And they got her back now playing an old lady. She's like an elder figure Now she's got a very interesting story Because I think her name's Rita Monroe Right She's very interesting because Brando knocked her up Sweet

And then refused to pay for the abortion And then she'd on her While she was getting the abortion Oh no she had a miscarriage That's the yeah She had a miscarriage She was like where's Brando And her like ah

Some of it up there likes me Ah Yeah And she was like Where's Brando and he was all fucking Like Richard Pryor that's where Richard Pryor came up with the album that

that Brando's crazy Bicentennial Brando I'm gonna stop seeing Brando now because I went to Africa I ain't never gonna call another giddy Brando again He fuck me in my eyes It's so good

Yeah No wait it was Prior who fucked Brando Wasn't it? I didn't read into it I don't do this specify who did what I see well not yet They probably went back and forth. We're referencing a story, by the way.

I forget people don't really know what we're talking about. Anybody who's listening to this podcast and does know that Marlon Brando fucked Richard Pryor, please turn off right now. You're not welcome here. You're not the kind of person I want listening to this show.

I assume Troglodite. I assume Pryor was a bottom. But maybe I'm assuming, maybe they can both be bottoms. Yeah. Then Lewis B. Mayor came in and said, oh, Danny's home. Mendo, my boys.

Okay, so West Side Story Yeah, I enjoyed it a lot The lyrics are funny There's kind of a little bit long It's like two and a half hours But I suppose there is musical nuts To freak out if you're quieting down So you kind of have to do it

I did like it I'd like to go watch the original as well I went on to the West Side Story subreddit What Interesting That's really not something I expected to exist The West Side Story subreddit Reddit. Seems like those

not a lot of crossover between the subreddit people and the Broadway people, I would imagine. Very interesting, a lot of memes. All the memes didn't get. I think Andrew Lloyd Webber's on Fortune. Liza Minnelly was a big fat pig. Her pussy stinks. Judy Garland

was a little jizz bucket. Everyone had to go. Even that dog. Toto fucker. Doggy style. Hey. Andrew, come on. We're going to be I'm coming dear I'll be just one moment

Anyway Yeah there was a fun little Yeah Sorry What was on West Side Story Yeah The subreddit Yeah there's a lot of memes

And that don't make sense Okay That'll probably make sense to them Yeah Yeah yeah But it's like all It's like the memes And it's kind of like

Like Drake And then like Like you know Drake Like And it'd be like West Side Story 2021 And Drake's kind of like

not impressed and then West Side Story 1961 he's all happy it's like that kind of shit and you're like oh I guess that's something wow somebody made that

and then posted it it's like I'm about to set the internet on fire here I'm done wait for the money I'm going to meet this NFT I'm just

so so like it's classic kind of story where like there's one the jets falls in love it won the shit Puerto Ricans

and then there's a race war going on and their love can their love withstand this racial kind of Romeo Juliet-esque Yeah exactly yeah And they're saying some songs There's an attempted rape Yeah so how does

It's a pretty adult And like you know Yeah I mean like they say spick As I mentioned You have Characters get stabbed Yeah And die

You see blood A little bit of blood It's not like It's not like blood It's not like blood coming out of their ears It's not reservoir dogs Yeah And then like

there's an attempted rape where like the hero well I assume the heroes because they're white maybe they're not maybe they're not

heroes actually now I think about it but all the the white guys So Ansel Eaglethorpe or whatever he's called Yeah all the white guys

all team up and try and rape a Puerto Rican and the old lady has stopped them An old lady Yeah old lady is now

not to be in ages but they're not exactly known for their abilities to prevent gang rape are they well no it's not

she doesn't stop before she stops him and make them feel guilty she's kind of I'm not man I'm just disappointed oh my boner's gone

no she's just like you shall be ashamed of yourselves and all the rapists like oh you're right so now it's funny because so was Ansel Eagort one of the attempted rapers? No he wasn't oh okay he was he somebody did a quick rewrite there no I think they shot the whole thing before his

he got to do you want to talk about his me too well I guess yes some girl on Twitter said that he sexually assaulted her when she was 17 and he Which is legal. We legal in New York, baby. But she claims that it wasn't just

underage, it was the, she said no when he fucked her. Legal in New York, baby. No, yeah, no, yeah. De Blasio. Hey, didn't you read the Patriot Act? Or, after the towers fell, I can fuck whoever I want.

Yeah, and also didn't a 14-year-old girl say, like, he sent me dickpicks? He sent her dickpicks when he was 17. And she was 14. New York, baby. Yeah. Hey, forget a bar You should New York thing

You ever slice You have a cook You send your cato little kitty Or something Go to your Yankees game Oh, now red sacks Am I right? I love this town

Yeah So he got accused Well his life is very interesting Because he's like From a very rich To-do family Yeah that does seem on brand for him Because he seems completely

devoid of any humanity or empathy or an ability to convey emotion which you think would be a downside for an actor but no apparently not I think he's terrible man they fucking loved him for a while there they were really pushing him

Baby driver was dog shit the editing was the only enjoyable part no wait don't attack me here I wasn't saying here sorry I didn't say no you stop I'm standing up for myself no hey Brian yeah when I'm coming at you

you'll know it don't you worry about that sweetheart Don't worry, sweetie. You'll know. I remember like when I watch Baby Driver, I watch with some people and I was like, I don't like the Baby Driver guy and you're like, oh, Brian, you big sour face,

Corey. You're ruining everyone's fun. Go, go home. Go sit in the car park. This is my home, I don't care. Go sit in the car park. Not in the car park, all right? On the bonnet.

Yeah, no, he's terrible, though. But they were trying to push him, so they gave him baby driver, Ready Player 1 Big budget movie Billionaire Boys Club Yeah And he's also in the new Michael Mann show

Oh what? Yeah Michael Mann's new HBO show What's it about It's a Tokyo Vice And it's about an American Getting mixed up in the Akusa Tokyo Voice you're saying

So remember Miami Vice Yeah This is Tokyo Voice Oh okay Yeah I don't like that Ansel Eaglethorpe guy So, how did West Side Story get received? Big box office bomb.

Yeah. Critics like it? Yeah, but you got nominated and people did like it. Okay. Even people who didn't like it, still, like, it's technically very good. What's he like in it? Is he? He's very plain.

So it's like, all these fun guys be like, hey, get out here. We don't like you tap around here. And he's kind of like the guy trying to go straight where he's like, hey, guys, I'm not in that life anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want to be a jet anymore, all right? Is it set, like, in the 40s or 40s? 50s I think it's 50s

Yeah Corey Stoll is in it Oh yeah He's good He plays a cop Who likes to smack some heads Crumkey

Officer Crumkey He's not Crumpkey He's the guy Who's in church Crumkey's in it though There is a crumpke Yeah Officer Crumpke Crump you

What I wait to do Officer Crumpkey Crump Because they wanted to say Fuck They wanted to say fuck They wanted to say fuck They wanted to say fuck

They wanted to say fuck It's a very fun song Yeah Fun song Yeah There's also like little fun bits in the Like it's very funny Okay

Yeah You're you're a loving Westside story Yeah they're like my dad's a junkie My mother's the hoo Like they say stuff like that And like my brother's wearing a dress What am I to do? I'd like

The shit was like a 20-21 rea But that's totally fine That's not anything to do With why I'm having inner turmoil As a character Here's the fun thing okay So in the 61 version There's a character called anybody

Anybody Yeah Now, anybody's a tomboy In the original movie Now, in this movie Anybody is trans Yeah But what I liked about it is

Because you do a real fake thing Where it's like, you know Hey, this trans person's pretty okay Yeah Let's be up those spicks Like that, okay But in this they're like Look at them, boys

I hate those goddamn specs But in this okay They're like, you're a genetic freak Yeah But then okay Is that the only reason You like to do this stuff? We're like, yay.

What are we to do? Officer Cropke, it's a genetic freak. No, but in this, okay, the trans person, she gives them information on where the Puerto Ricans are, and then they respect them. Okay. Because, you know, he helped them. So it's kind of a lesson there somewhere.

He helped them? Yeah. Yeah, no, I'm right. Oh, right? Yeah. I've got Spielberg back in me on this. No, think about what I said, a tomboy. No, I thought you said that the character's trans.

Yeah. Oh, okay. Well, you know, okay, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, I'm the bad man. You couldn't tell who anybody was. Oh, crump you. Crop all of you.

Oh, fuck, I'll crump and kill your cropping kids. I'll crump them right, their little cropping assholes. You fucking crumper. Very funny there, wasn't it? He's having fun. I think it's actually a trans person playing anybody. Okay. But...

Good. That's something different. Yeah, sure. And it wasn't, like, it didn't feel forced. Yeah. Felt like it worked, it was organic. Yeah. And it kind of, like, it's basically the same plot.

So, back then, a lot of them would be tombys, you know? Sure, yeah. I mean, there were, like, trans characters in, like, sort of 50s, like... Joan of Arc was trans, I hear. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's a theory, anyway, isn't it? No, I think it's fact is it.

It's fact is it. Okay, right. On the website, also, I hear, St. Bridgett. St. St. Fridge in. No, I did look up at thing a while ago were like famous trans people in history

and you'd be shocked. Yeah. Lincoln? No, no. I'm joking. But there was, there's a good few that like definitely would be trans now. Like,

is something that sort of would have featured a lot in like the kind of like beat novel, like novelists like that sort of beat poetry, those beatnik types like fucking, also on last exit to Brooklyn. There's like a trans character. Oh, yeah. I suppose transvest.

but like I think they did have like a sort of transgender identity as well Yeah well transvestite then would have been like You know No well transvestite it's just guy dressed as woman I know but for a lot of them That's like you know

I'll go this far for now You know it's like guys Let's say pretend there's guys you know With glasses okay Like I'm not gay But they're like suck a cock Well I'm just you know I still support Tottenham

So I'm still good you know It's just a laugh you know Yeah I still I support the union I'm never like Dirty Sanchez I'm poncho in Dirty Sanchez But yeah I've actually read that

I don't remember much about it I know it's a bit of bummer Last Exited of Brooklyn Yeah it's Hughart Selby Jr He wrote Requiem for a Dream He did yeah He did a few Movies that based on books

Actually there was an adaptation of Last Exit of Brooklyn I never saw that It's a HBO one isn't it I was I don't I've never seen it I read the book though The book is great

like yeah but it is very dark what's it about again it's just like following unions and shit yeah well like there's one character he's in the unions but then he's also this sort of repressed guy who hates his wife and then he like starts like hanging out with this trans person and they're all on benedrine or benny they call it and it's then he ends up trying to like rape a kid and then he gets impaled on a thing it's pretty cool but anyway i need to reread that they kill them i think i read that when i was fucking like 14 so i didn't really sink in completely it's a good it's good book but yeah sure that's well like trans people

go back to that okay would have been on like the fringes exactly of society because you know they weren't allowed be like a you know bank managers all right

yeah yeah so they would just been like in the in the in the junk houses yeah with the buggers they were wank managers eh

bannabha banah man up like a trans person like hey you're like a wank manager go on do it manage my account.

Oh, I want to make a deposit all over your face. Okay, I've kind of lost track of the... That was West Side Story. You enjoyed it. I did, I did, yeah, yeah. You liked Power of the Dog. So look at him, he's changing his...

I'm winning. His old cynical ways. I'm winning. And I watched Red Rocket, which I don't want to talk with that too much, because I want you to watch it. I want to talk about it. Okay, yeah, because I really do want to watch it. It's very good. Yeah, yeah.

Tell you what, have a little cheat day. A little mental health day My life is a cheat day baby Wear some slippers A nice cuddly robe Sit down watch the Florida project And Red Rocket Back to back

Keep the hand lotion close by If you know what I'm talking about There's a big fake penis in the Red Rocket Good Yeah And it's fake I looked up as well Because like that can't be real Yeah but didn't you do that

when you saw the Ray J. Kim Kardashian video, that has to be fake. That can't be real. Yeah, so any other Oscar? Well, you watch King Richard. We talked about that before. Before we go, all right, just real quickly, I'm going to, we're at like 50 minutes, okay?

I'm going to go through some movies that are coming out next year. Yeah. And I want you to pick which one you're most excited about. You want me to give an opinion that movies that haven't been released. Yeah. You want a critical analysis of a title. If it's not good enough I'm gonna read some out

I want you to like Which one you most excited for Okay Okay so first one Killers of a Flower Moon Scorsese I'm looking forward to that De Niro

It's all shot as well Decaprio Is Jesse Plemans Is Jonah Hill in it? No No but like Oh well then fuck that film No Jonah

No Caden No I am looking forward to that though Is that an apple It's gonna be apple right Yeah it's gonna be like A big long epic based on true story about a guy

who started killing Native Americans for oil and then the birth of the FBI Interesting That's interesting Yeah yeah No definitely

I am looking forward to that Next one Canterbury Glass This is a new David O Russell David O'Russel Crime movie okay It's Christian Bale

And Margot Robbie All right Are two doctors That commit crimes Oh What kind of crimes I don't know Killing patients

They're like sexy Harold Shipman I hope soul. Yeah, yeah. Sorry, sexier, Harold,

come on, he had it going on. He had the junk in the trunk. With the beard and the glasses, you know? Like a, like a game of guess

who that could kill you. Yeah. So this should be good. It's, so I mentioned Christian Bail and Margot Robbie. Chris Rock, Anna Taylor Joy,

yeah. Mike Myers and the Niro. I don't think Chris Rock is a very good dramatic actor. He isn't. No. I think all the rest of them are.

He smile. He's just, I don't know, yeah. come off he wasn't good and saw he's not even

good when he plays himself really I haven't seen I haven't seen the new Fargo season that he was in but I never heard anything good about it

Yeah yeah yeah but I mean like Mike Myers and De Niro Yeah David O'Rustle was what

The last film he did was American Hustle right? I think he did Do you Joy Oh yeah No one watched that Nobody liked that

Yeah I never seen it Anyway That could be good Jack Next up the killer by David Fincher This is based on a series of French novels

Okay I'm very interested in this It's going to be Michael Fastbender Plays a killer Yeah It's about him killing people That's all I know Like the snowman

Yeah But he wasn't the killer though in that Oh right Val Kilmer was the killer And yeah he played a killer He didn't talk that much Because it'll make everyone feel sad Hello Michael

I am here to kill you now. Next one. Bardo. Bardot. Yeah. By Alphrondo G. Birdman director. Okay. Yeah, this is a crime epic. He did the Revenant as well. Yeah, yeah. This is a crime

epic, and this should be fun, because a lot of people died on set, because he didn't follow COVID protocol. Really? Yeah, he doesn't believe in COVID. What? Yeah, so they filmed there in Mexico when those people died. No way. Yeah. Man, that's all. What? How did I not hear about this? I didn't hear about either.

This is great! Yeah. Oh, I've got a new lease on life. This is amazing. Finally, a guy who takes risks. Yes. Actors are cattle. Very sick cattle.

Wow. Jesus. Next up, the fablemans. The fablemans. This is by Stephen Spielberg. Oh. And it's about a young Stephen Spielberg. Oh, what?

Yeah. Growing up, being interested in film. No, that is a self-indulgent vanity project. Oh, Seth Rogen, Rogen, plays a. his uncle. I don't care. He has David Lynch in it. David Lynch plays his neighbor. He's directing a movie about his own...

About the legendary Stephen Spielberg. That's disgusting. That is... I find that more offensive than the Isaac Cappy allegation. Do your research, sheeple. I'm leaving breadcrumbs. So you haven't...

Is your bloody nun? She's what I'm saying. You haven't been won over by that? No. Okay, this might... All the rest I did like. might peak your prick God, I hope so The greatest beer run ever By Peter Farley

Oh This is a true story Is he doing drama now It's drama, yeah But this could be fun, okay It's a true story about You know the Vietnam War I heard of it

You know all those soldiers Yeah They needed beer, okay Okay This is about the people who brought beer to the soldiers They were the beer Beer unit

They did a beer run Well no, that was their job that they go into Vietnam and give soldiers beer Yeah Sorry guys, did you never hear of heroin Yeah, they don't be fun Beer, they're doing heroin all the time Well, you don't need beer when you're smoking opium

And raping 12 year old Vietnamese children They get a nice warm can of bud Yeah, yeah So where did they go for the beer? These, uh... America What? No, they

They do the beer run So they fly from America Okay With a plane full of beer Okay And they have to go in and give it to a shoulders. Right.

And then, so yeah, I get, but then why is there the greatest beer on it? Is it just following them? Or is it like a big like, oh, the plane crashed? Probably, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. Imagine silly stuff could happen. One of them gets diarrhea. Yeah. It just sounds like very tropic thunder-ish, to be honest.

Well, it's going to be a, uh, uh, Bill Murray and Russell Crowe. Okay. It's pretty good. I like those guys. Yeah. Yeah. And Bill Murray is going to get even fatter than Russell Crow. That'd be great now.

Okay, what about next now? This, I'm very interesting just now. Poor Things by Yargos Litemos. That's the killing of a sacred deer guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This should be really fun now. I like him. William Defoe.

Willem Defoe. William Defoe. You're right, yeah, yeah. It's like Josh Whedon. So he plays a guy who's a scientist, and his daughter, I think, kills herself. Okay. Daughter's played by Emma Stone. Good.

So he digs up her body and puts, a baby's brain and Emma Stone's his body and now imagine Emma Stone would be like Goo Goo Gaga Oh my Fucking tits Oh I'm not technically

They're Pino I was working very late In the lab one night And we came across An eerie side We did the smash The monster smash In her gash

So yeah You like that? I do like that. That sounds weird and... Weird and disturbing and you get to see Emma Stone kill herself, so that's pretty good. Next up,

White Noise by Noah Bachman. Okay. An apocalyptic thriller by Noah Bachman. That's his name, isn't it? Is that the Squid and the Whale guy? Bound Bown Bok. You know what I mean.

Yeah, I do. Dewey Louie. All his films about my dad was distant. Yeah, yeah. Oh, you didn't. I don't like you as much as I would like to like you, son. Oh, day.

You don't really mean it, do you? Well, why do you think about that? Something different from Noah, Noah Bown Dewey. Hey, what's it called? White noise. And it's a... It's an apocalyptic thriller.

Okay. I'm kind of... I'm done with the apocalyptic thriller. you know because we're getting very close to our own real world apocalyptic thriller I don't need Noah the time of a bus man's holiday oh what

what's an apocalypse to you they make you use your iPhone during Shabbas or something yeah that greatest brisket run in history how we're getting the tropes you're brink

they don't want it yeah there's just no way to defend this is just pure anti-semitism. But anyway. Oh, look, move on from that. I'm doing the voices. Next up, Babylon by Damien Chavezel.

Okay. Whiplash guy. Yeah. This is a thriller set in like the 50s with Brad Pitt, Margot Robbie, and, uh, not Toffer Grace, uh, Toby McGuire. Ugh. They're doing things. Okay, good.

In Hollywood in the 50s. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, okay. And there's a lot of people playing real life people back then. Kind of like... The avator or something like that. Yeah, or like once upon a time.

Yeah. Yeah, sure. That'll be fun. Yeah. Domnick... What's his name? Damien... Chavisel, I think.

There's only a few left, don't worry. Emancipation, that's a slave drama with Will Smith. Okay. He's really going for the Oscar now, isn't he? He is, yeah. Three thousand years of longing, that's by George Miller, who did Mad Max. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's about, I think

Tilda Swinton does a deal with the devil. Oh, a Faustian pact. Yeah, exactly. What else we got here? A new Ron Howard movie. Oh, 13 lives. About a young Ron Howard whose friend with Stephen Spielberg.

And then they get pussy. Black pussy. Fappy days. So stupid What's this one about now The Rod Howard one? Remember those kids that stuck in a

What was he like? Oh, under the cave Yeah, yeah And then Elon Musk was like Oh, hey, you are definitely A P-DU-File Well, this is about that paedophile Oh, okay

Yeah, saving those kids Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I think it's Colin Farrell Playing the Nants Yeah, exactly I don't think he actually was a knot Underwater Pito No, yeah, yeah, yeah, no

I think Elon Musk has been a bit, a bit little bit, a little prick, yeah, yeah, yeah, You know something weird about Elon Musk? His face? No! You know he lives in Gene Walder's house. What? Yeah, he bought Gene Walder's house.

The second Gene Walder died, he was like, this will be my house now. That is so weird. Yeah, and he lives in it with no furniture. He doesn't believe in furniture. He's a minimalist. He's a minimalist? Yeah.

The billionaire? Sending fucking rockets to space and self-driving cars? He sold all his other houses, and now he just lives in like a basically empty. That's all tax bullshit It's an empty shell With Gene Walder's photograph I'm probably body as well

As stuff body And he's like Okay do the thing You roll around And you stand up Do it Oh he's fucking dead I forgot

Let's make our sequel To see no evil Here no evil So let's do one more And we'll get the fuck out of here Okay Oh well It also is like

You know Avatar 2 And shit like that Oh yeah Yeah Disappointment Boulevard That's the new Ariiast movie.

Oh yeah. Elvis, of course. Oh, fuck, yeah. Now, this should be good now. The, where's it going now? Oh, I've lost it. Oh, no. It's fine.

The Banshee of Inish Ayrn. Is that the new McDonough? Yeah. Is it Michael McDonough? Michael McDonough, yeah. So Barry Kogan, Colin Farrell. Don, I mean, hey, you had me. And then throwing a few gleasons as well, for good measure, yeah.

Don't even know which ones. Any of them. It's fine. Well, not all of them. Let's be honest. Yeah, yeah. Maybe McSavage will pop up as well. You could get him. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I think they could get him now. No, I think McSavage is like legitimately friends with your man. Yeah, he was in that movie with Jessica Chastain. And Caleb Landry Jones. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what the movie was. It hasn't come out here.

It hasn't come out. It's called something really generic like The Forgiven or something like that. But then, yeah, there's a picture on Instagram of, McSavage grabbing Jessica Chastin's tits. And suck in on him. And she loved it. She was like, yes, give me the savage eye. Like, Savage, let me lick your fingers.

Give me the savage chaps eye. Rahoo. Raoo. Fuck me as Hector. Fuck me as Hector. Say, wow. Wow. Jessica, your tits are amazing.

Wow. Ah, Jesus, Jessica. Do you have the big joebly-wooblies there, do you? Yeah. Ah, Jesus. Yeah. A big shout out to McSavage. We're a fan of your work

He gets some good pus He does Yeah Top cop quality pus Primo snaz Nothing but the best And also I'd notice well With that nose

He can sniff it out You know what I mean But I've noticed now Anyone who fucks McSavage Their life always turns out well Do you notice that Yeah They're always more successful

Like good luck Chuck Yeah You know that movie Yes He is Dane Cook And good luck Chuck I just need to fuck him And then I'll be on live

the Apollo yes even that one he used to let's not do his whole history okay but a few people

I've seen okay they fucked them and now they're in big movies yeah you know

I've been trying to get some magic I keep dropping things near him and bending over oh excuse me Sidney

Sweeney she's on euphoria now yeah she used to be on the street in Dublin he

he met he just she was just a beggar at George Street Arcade McSavich Kim swaned up with his guitar and cowboy hat is like, follow me

like the Pied Piper you know Pied Piper He didn't even fuck her just spit on her and the magic spit made her tits grow The size of her heart Like Jack off of the giant Tits stop

I don't know Oh wait before we go as well Yeah I was going to do a thing where we have the BJ awards. Oh yeah, you were going to do that. But I kind of forgot. Yeah. But really quick now. But I think we agree on most things. So, like, let's say best drama, succession.

Oh, yes. I agree. Agreed there. Best TV, best comedy? Righteous gemstones. Okay. Can you think of any better? No. No, I'll give it. Yeah, righteous gemstones, yeah.

Now, best film, I couldn't even think of what I've seen this year. I give it Spider-Man, but you probably disagree. I haven't seen Spider-Man, so I wouldn't know. I don't think you'd like Spider-Man if you'd. saw it okay what's the best film you've seen

the last year oh I don't know yeah it's too much pressure let's say spider man yeah spider man spider man spider pig

that spider pig that spider pig is John Mullaney oh really yeah I don't like it yeah he cheated on his

wife I imagine he didn't well kind of did though he didn't though yeah he did no

she was like four months pregnant like a week after they broke up yeah he didn't push

on the stairs did he he's a good man okay but that's the whole thing people make parasocial

relationships and then they kind of get angry they feel like you portrayed them it's like me and McSavage okay

why are you dating her when are you gonna grow up and stop wasting your time with these silly hordes and realize

you've got something real here Dave something special how did you get into my house stop trying to

change the subject I do the thing we're like Happy birthday Mr. McSavage Yeah Don Rickles in the corner There's fucking Brian

Coos is drunk off his ass Bobby McSavage And they both take turns on me Yes Nice All right Also finally best hits Yeah

Now the obvious choice To be Sydney Sweeney Yeah But I think April From Righteous Gemstones Oh the wife Yes Yes

I think they're more oppressive because it's like, you know, she, Sidney's she has the rookie, okay? Yeah. She's only like 20-something. Yeah, so let's see what they're like, you know, April, why think April's like 30-something? Yeah, it's like 37.

Yeah, okay, so those tits have withstood, God, you know. God and Daddy McBride's wrath. And the elements and all that of it. And John Goodman's big cock. Yes. So, like, I think they win best hits of 2022. I'll give that to you, Brian.

Yes, I concur. But Sidney Sweeney's a runner-up She wins best rookie tits And there's all Sidney, don't give up Well, you didn't watch White Lotus and you shouldn't Because it was shit

But Alexander de Dario Do you think she'd win? My God, man, she is just She's just like in another league She's so hot I don't think I can even find You're attractive Because I know, I know so much

What? Because I know No, it's almost like You see a great painting But her beautiful eyes Brian, her eyes are still beautiful. I'm in love with her. Is she say anything about her?

She is my David McSavage. Think about Oh wow. Okay. Did she have a show in or she? She wishes. No, but she's in that white lotus and she's like in the bikini for most of them. Just insane jump. Like she there's this one bit where she sits down

and her tits keep jiggling for like half a second. Afterwards it's like, my God. Anyway, Steve Zams there. You get to see his cock. I'm a Zan fan You know that You're a Zan man

I'm a Zan man All the way The Zan can I stand Zan Because I is a fan Of the man Well you interrupt me Well I was trying to make a point

To call me gay all right Yeah well My point was Proofs in the pudding Darling Oh shut up My point was Sometimes a girl like that

She's so unobtainable Yes I find it hard to even look at her That's good And I just want her to wear Burka Yeah Man just take us

The old Dandy Dyer No we're not doing that again You're gonna ruin my shes shot with her. Sorry, yeah, yeah, yeah. But anyway, I can't wait until the show gets so big we get like celebrity call-ins and we can have like the Dario calling.

We don't have the infrastructure for that. What if we have like a can on a string, maybe? Just outside my bed. Hey, stop talking about my tits up there. Oh, sorry, sorry. Are your tits rolling? Do you have Prince Edward in your tits? Well, yeah.

Anyway. Anyway, I think that's the end of the episode. Yeah. A nice wild one Sometimes I don't think people Don't understand what we're talking about Yeah, yeah I mean it is

But it's free, fuck you Yeah Hey, who can argue with that Brian knows what the people want But they do like that for some reason Yeah The more abuse we give them That's a bad precedent isn't it

Isn't it? We're like, yeah We're all like the Dare Little Mo and we're Trevor In EastEnders You don't remember I barely get the reference to beat his wife

but he's like in a very thing you're more you fucking your stupid god oh Trevor I'm so sorry

please don't hit me again you're got my little trout I'll call you I'll kill you I'll kill you anyway

but what bad is okay so the fans might be like oh I love it when Brian's like oh most of you

let's be honest okay I've talked to people who are like fans of ours okay and like oh I love when James

like you fucking drug the dice you fucking scum you dirty dogs I love that but that might go your head

and then you'd be like oh yeah I can stab him come here and throng the diet and not shit what? Yeah that's right

it's the podcast in real life see everyone likes it when it's this kind of distance they're just listening to it you never like meet somebody

in real life who likes the podcast and within three seconds they're like oh oh this is what you're like you're just yeah

that's why life show will be fun because they have to see us like are like the way my body moves and stuff like ew I'm gonna get so fucking hammered I might get hammered as well I tell you get hammered

and I might take some pills I find in the the street yeah just under the seat of your car like a mango pick and mix yeah

I think that'll be fun now I think the best thing to happen is if we just get really wasted and then someone tasers me now it's time for the punishment he just break a bottle

yeah all right So yeah, Hey Penny 24th, we're going to hop over to the Patreon. Yeah, but keep that date free 24th of April and the Heypenny live show. We haven't decided how much we'll charge people yet, but it's going to be a lot. I just say apply to the credit union now. Just get the ball rolling. My firstborn, what?

Yeah, all right. All right, good luck, boy. Thanks very much. Goodbye.