Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Episode 245 : Spawn

Episode Date: March 24, 2025

Brian goes to Hell and gets cucked.

All right. Yes. Are you ready? Come on, hurry up. They like the preamble. Yeah, do they? Yeah, people like the preamble, yeah. You need to record this all in one go, like adolescence.

One long take, you know? No, I don't want to do that, man. That's fucking too much work. Have the drone filming you? Yes. Oh, God, we're not cool enough of being cells. That's the problem. But anyway, okay, we're back, guys.

This is a free episode. We've got a lot to talk about. Me and James are watching some Bucoc. downstairs. The Bukaki Boys. Now, that sounds weirder than it is. It's actually a movie. Yeah. About, what was it called? Mope. Mope. It's called Mope.

M-O-P-E. Oh, I thought we're watching Monk. Tony Shalub is not going to like the Bukaki Boys. Oh my God, it's so messy it. I can smell it. I can taste it. It's in the air. You can stop tasting it.

No. This is how I solve crimes It's like immersion therapy This is how I overcome my OCD I need the book Hackey boys Yeah so we were on Amazon Prime And we saw a movie called Mope By the way I think Mope is like a name

For porn performer Who'll do the most deprave type stuff How would you know that? Because he came up at the start Oh right I wasn't paying attention I was too busy wanking I'd say like mope to be like grumpy or unhappy But also used to describe a particularly

Devant porn performer Right, okay, yeah Well, if you're not laughing, you're learning, you know I don't think it was that deviant I thought it kind of wholesome in a way It starts off Well, the synopsis is there's a murder in the sex industry Yes

It's like, okay, but it starts off with these lads About 30 something lads Yeah And they're all together And they're all getting ready for a big, big Bukaki scene Yeah And then they all come together literally okay

and the girls they're on the ground and they all start bukakiing okay and she's just getting glazed like a donut to be honest with you I kind of like talk

you know like people talk about men's mental health and stuff like yeah I think because I never played I don't play sports with lads okay but I would love to kind of boo cocky with lads

the fact that they're all different races and creeds and religions okay all these got one guy was crippled one guy had an eye patch alright you know one guy glasses

Asian all right but they all were together and all working together like there's one black guy he couldn't come and he was trying his best okay but it's the pressure

of like all these guys sure you know you know yourself James everyone's getting annoyed you know to have to get the bus and like come on hurry up

you know come on I gotta pick up my kids from school come on someone's kids and he's like I'm trying

but then some Asian guy comes up and he's like whispering into the black guy's ear he's like come on she wants your load

come on just like ASMOR yeah Come on. She wants your load. I'm Asian. Come on. And the black...

Oh, me so hard. No, he doesn't say that, James. Don't mock this, all right? This is a great moment of men coming together, all right? And he's like, eh, and he comes all over. This is what blind boy is talking about. That's why blind boy wears that mask. Well, that's how he went blind initially, too much jack at all.

Remember that all over? Like, you're doing too much, you'll go blind? Yeah, and you get hairy hands as well, you know? Yeah, and some people say that, like, if you masturbate, it makes a disabled baby. Ah. Yeah, so every time he sees... That would explain quite a lot, actually. That's what some people say, yeah?

You have a disabled, so, like, you masturbate, you know, like, that's a potential baby. Right. But instead of, you know, going into a woman, you shot it onto the wall, okay, of your sitting room. Oh, you wouldn't do that. Yes, you would. It ruins the paint. That's how you mark your... territory are yeah yeah it's mine mother so so like uh that spooge okay goes to hell and that's where

disabled people come from oh that's what um i'm been listening i've been reading the bible lately both are learning something today all right i've been reading the bible but it's not the bible it's my own the creation the king brian version the uh brian bible i like it yeah well hey speaking of hell stuff. I want to talk about other stuff later on. We'll get back to Bacoccian. But I want to talk about Spawn, first of all. I watch Spawn on St. Patrick's Day. Right.

Yeah. I, you know, like a good Irish man, the parade was happening. I closed all the curtains, the doors, locked myself inside, okay, put on Spawn and had a lovely time. Were you drinking? No. Okay. No, I just, uh, just feeling sad. Sure. But Spawn shared me all.

because I saw the Bukaki lads I was like none of my friends want Bukaki they're all they're all ejaculating inside their wives and procreating God doesn't like that We need all get together

and make a whole race of Mongo babies by doing a Bukaki scene come on let's do it together we can create the 2028 Special Olympics That's all terrible. Very cruel and hurtful things.

Well, it's not your fault, is it? No. I put these ideas in your head. My dad jerked off. And then I, you know, what happened is it my dad jerked off on a toilet seat? My mother sat on it. Then I know a gardener probably shoved some miracle grow up there. And then six and a half months later, I came out.

And, you know. So you're right. proves your theory I think you know actually be serious for a minute okay to be serious for a minute okay talking of disabled people

so the labour part in the UK are cutting loads of disabled benefits okay yeah so like you know like wheelchairs and like lollipops yeah yeah sure you know clothes and human rights and all that all right yeah

all disabled people have been naked now all right yeah what's wrong with that no so no you know what that'd make you feel bad because one thing you know that rumor about how black guys

are big dicks the only people who rival them are the disabled community disabled a massive dick there's the big old retort cocks that are just like

just swinging Thor's hammer around you know what I mean like they're so big that even when they get hard it doesn't fully go up because it's so heavy you know what I'm talking about guys I got you

I'm picturing it right now I can't not picture it I'm always picturing what I'm doing a with khaki's saying that's what I'm thinking of yeah yeah you're like dating a girl like yeah so you ever date retired a guy you know it's uh hey it's cool you know that's probably a rumor is this oh it's true oh okay i've got not against him right yeah some of my best friends are yeah anyway look um oh so they're cutting disabled benefits are right right and so strange so it's like

the last leg so obviously they've got a pro disabled uh bent to him, all right, yeah. The TV show? Yeah, yeah. It's Adam Hill and floppy, where is it? Pingu, what's his there? Okay. Alex. Josh Whittickham, that's it. Yeah.

So, they're all... What's Adam Hills's disability? It's like... Australia? Look at it. He's got one leg. Oh, is that? Yeah, yeah. I know that. All right, yeah. He's got one leg, all right? Yeah. So they have because he's got the decency to cover it up on like so.

But it's funny. So, like, obviously, cutting disabled benefit, it's not like a crowd pleaser, you know, you're not going to do when people are like, yes,

don't worry, we're cutting all disabled benefits, and we're going to fucking kill them as well. Makes you proud to be British, it does. But, like, to have Alistair Campbell on,

right. He's not even a member of the Labour Party anymore. He's just a podcaster. Much more important. Yeah. And they go, like, all right,

sour, tackle disabled people. Why not the rich people? Well, actually a lot of disabled people, they're stuck in a system. So if we cut their benefits, then the fucking get a bit of cop on. You can't just lie around watching

Pokemon eating jelly beans. You've got to get out there, you know. You've got to grind and hustle. But also, they don't seem to any push back on it. Like, interesting points, Alster Cam. Oh, never really. about all that for you I'm like

stanched out of it yeah he's a real scumbag that Alster Campbell yeah and his little partner as well his brino tool

his uh Rory Jennings is the name his podcasting partner he's even worse you know he's like a former Tori

oh fuck right he's like a former like he they're doing like crossfire you know not really because disagree with each other

all the time basically so it's like well I'm a Tory it's like there's no real difference in either party, Brian? You're going to get us killed.

They're going to send Josh Winnicum after us to kill us. Yeah, so it's just like, oh, I think you know, it's this all, I think Boris Johnson's bad.

I think he's very bad. Brexit, I think Brexit has pros and cons, most mostly cons. Yeah. Same. And if ever Rory Jennings

disagrees with him, Alistair Campbell gets all like snotty. Oh, yeah. Oh, great. Yeah. great yeah

just gets silent and he's like maybe you'll miss me when I'm gone yeah

if I did it it'd be your fault could you live with the guilt could you look my daughter in her

stupid nepo baby face and tell her yeah your meal tickets over love

daddy went into the he fucking threw himself into the drink into the Thames

yeah So no more Edinburgh Fringe shows for you which is ironic because it would be the first interested thing that ever happened in your fucking privileged cult life. That's what he would say.

That man that you were talking about. That's his name. Rory Jennings. Yes, that's the one. I think that's his name, yeah. There's a Chelsea fan called Rory. I always get those two mixed up. But anyway, who cares, all right?

What was it talking about? Jesus. Spawn. Yeah, sorry, Spawn. So I'm going to give me a bit of history of Spawn. I'm going to take you back to the 90s, James. Oh, yes. So the 90s, times are good.

Oh, with the bar, the bag, the bag, diggy, diggy. Now, during the 90s, okay, comic books weren't doing so well. Right. Like, obviously, like, Spider-Man and that were doing well, but a lot of comics weren't. Marvel almost went bankrupt at one stage, right? That's to sell Spider-Man off to Sony and shit, all right? Yeah. But there was these very popular creators.

And two examples of Rob Liefeld And Todd McFarland And they were really popular I've heard of Todd McFarland Yeah, yeah So Todd McFarland he created Venom Okay

And he was doing Spider-Man He was writing and drawing Okay Get him, vetum Gotta get him Get him Exactly yeah That's the peak

All right Yeah And he also very popular He would have done You know the corn video With the bullet Is a corn? Oh yeah

Freak on a leash Yeah yeah he did that Oh Daptte Oh Daptie I'm just a freak on a leash It's so good, man. That's great. Corn is great.

Yeah. I don't care what they say, all right? The feminists. Tell them. Yeah, the bloody, the woke mind forest. They want you to enjoy corn. All these grooming gangs won't like you listen to corn. They probably don't even eat halal corn, don't it?

Please, not to be putting on the new metal when I try to have sex with you. It is distracting. It is so loud. I do not like. You're probably like child on leash, don't you? but anyway so he's like a very popular guy okay

and they're like you create these characters Rob Liefeld created Deadpool or he created Venom okay but point is okay these characters do really well

these guys don't own them to get pittance so you create these characters Marvel owns all the rights they're like hang on the fuck this is my character I'm wasting it so they said you know what

we either want like more control over the characters or we're leaving Marvel were like, who cares? We get new guys in. Yeah. People come for the characters, not the creators. Yeah. Okay. So these guys plus other other guys like Eric Larson and that, like about six or seven guys. And back then, who would have been making those decisions? Would it have been Stan Lee? Stanley would have been a small part of it. You know, Stanley's more publicity than he else. But the powers that be, okay, I think Ike Pearl Butter was in it. Anyway,

who cares, okay? Powers that be say, no, the guys leave to start up. image comics. Okay. It's a rival to DC and Marvel. Right. And kind of like an indie label,

you know? Yeah, exactly. The eye, okay, image, but it's also independent. So the only thing they own is the eye

on the cover. Okay. It's all creator owned, like you own everything. Yeah, yeah. That's cool. So the very, I think the one...

Socialist? Yeah, yeah, I don't agree with it. But like, one of the very first comics was Todd McFarlin did Spawn.

All right? Spawn was his version of like, it's like Batman, but cool. Oh. Yeah, but like twisted.

Yeah, yeah. And he doesn't get sad or anything like that. No. That's for Nancy boys. Oh, no, no. He does get sad. It's very emo. Oh, okay.

So Spawn was a huge hit. It got an animated series on HBO, got toys and shit, all right, and eventually a movie, all right? And this movie was the animated series adult? Yeah, adult, yeah, yeah. So I'm going to tell you the story of Spawn, okay, like the actual in continuity story. So Al Simmons is the baddest black guy you ever met

And I mean bad as and cool Right Yeah okay Just in case you're like They're all no They're all cool No So Al Simmons

Okay He's a badass motherfucker Works for a black ops Wetworks team You know He's taking out all the people You know Every so like the first scene

Of the movie okay There's like an airplane With like some Ayatola You know Oh yeah One of those Or just a Muslim guy I don't know

I know It's Cal Penn or something but like he's like lock and load and he blows up the plane right okay with loads of civilians on it and stuff all right he's like a fuck right hey cost to doing business yeah he's al simmons omelets and eggs you know and then martin sheen is like his uh like his um like his em you know he like runs a secret organization yeah he's like okay get him kill more hostages do it and he's like real evil you know that's not enough children make sure there's more children on it And he is like, he's terrible in this, by the way.

Like, he's a, yeah, he's not very good. He's smoking a big cigar and he's been like, oh yeah, then we can take out a whole village. Let's test out the weapon on the orphanage. Oh, I love it. I don't even do it for the money. I do it for the trill. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We got to work with this new nerve agent.

It's designed to kill puppies and old ladies. It's actually designed to find the most morally pure people, a man. mentionable and rip their ass whole out and war veterans. Yeah, yeah. So, but then Al Simmons, okay, it's like, oh, actually, maybe we shouldn't kill all the civilians. And Martin Sheen can't have that, all right? So his badass dissent among the ranks, I don't think so.

So also, I taught Martin Sheen just to just be like wearing a suit. At one stage he's like in the camo and he's got a gun. Like he's out in the field with them, you know? He's like, you're lucky I don't go out there because I'd kill. make you look bad Al Simmons because I'm so badass you know but then he has a this hot chick Angela all right and she kills oh no well no actually no my apologies no Martin Sheen kills him Martin Sheen that's like shoots him thousand like petrol set him on fire Al Simmons yeah Al Simmons okay and then you think that's the end of it don't you no no no

spawn you didn't let me answer well I knew you it fucking open right so Al Simms I'm saving you from embarrassing yourself. Al Simmons, it sounds like a real white nerd name. No, he's a black cool guy. Hello, I'm Al Simmons. No, no, he's black. He's Michael J. White. He's ripped. So he goes to hell. But there's a demon called like Magogbola or something like that, all right? Let's call him Satan, all right? So Satan is like, you're going to be my hell spawn. And hell spawns are hell soldiers. Okay. Yeah. So he sends them back to Earth to fight deep. demons and shit and stuff that's so fucked up even Satan himself can't handle it yeah yeah and then uh the villain is called the violator the violator yeah yeah and the violator

is awesome it's john lequisamo in a fat suit right and he's like what if the joker was twisted oh yeah you think the joker's cool don't you the joker's for fucking children this guy's real twisted so he's like big fat clown all right kind of like john Wayne Gacy? Yeah, yeah. And he smokes cigars. He's like, Hey,

look at you. He's got to do like a Robin Williams thing. He's doing lots of voices and that. Like, oh, you're a girly man. Oh, he,

how are you? Trying to do Jim Carrey and the mask. Yeah, yeah. Oh, do not go in there. Yeah, yeah. But then he's like, you know,

oh, I just shit myself. And he takes his pants off and he's got like brown stains. He rubs and spawns face. You know? Classic pranks. Classic 90s, Prax, dude. Let me ask you some questions. He's doing all that, all right? And like, oh, I didn't

mention, Al Simmons has a wife and daughter. Okay. Okay. So, it's, he comes back to Earth and three years have passed. He's in hell for three years. Right. And he goes to find his daughter and wife, okay? And it's a daughter's birthday party. He's like, oh, he's in the bushes looking in, all right? What? But he's all like goobily, golly. Oh, I didn't mention it. He's all scarred. Yeah. He's all scarred. Like, he's, basically burnt, okay? Right. So he sees,

oh, there's my daughter, good. There's my wife. Brilliant. There's my best friend. Oh, my loyal best friend. James Cadden, that's it. Oh, he's white as well.

Oh, of course. Oh, my good friend. He's been protecting my wife while I was dead. Oh, he's holding her nice and tight, just the kid. Oh, no. Oh, and he's like shifting. He's like fingering the wife.

Yeah. Oh, my good friend. Checking does nothing in my wife. wife's pussy. And making sure our daughter can see. Yeah, we look at the happy birthday, love. Oh, I'm opening my prison

early as well, lay up. Come on. Yeah, so he's being cooked. Yeah. And he's like, now he's doing depressed. Now let's play pin the cock and the junk and the junk. Yeah. He's lovely little birthday game for the little kiddies.

He's not like that, James. They're trying to, she's trying to hate a pinata, but instead of a stick she's using my car yeah I get the sweet cheese out that's fucked up you said it yeah I thought we were being

spawned dude we gotta be sick and twisted well actually you know what you are right because he's watching the child looking and then the violator shows up who's your daughter

who's this little Lolita you got here oh yeah he's doing all that it's actually it's not nice when I do it it's charming and playful

but when I'm Mexican doesn't know I'll be honest the violator did kind of remind me of you a bit but only in like the character you know because he's the whole thing

he shows up to his awful things you know that's his whole thing he shits himself he's fat and a racist and abuse here's thing though okay you thought that was it all right the violator can shed his skin

and turn into like you know the xenomorph an alien oh yeah so he's like do they have the rights to that no but he can do Oh It's not the alien But it looks like

Okay Right Right He's like Like the Fox Corporation But he's like And he's like a big demon thing

All right Okay that's cool And then It's like a shape shifter as well Yeah Yeah And then Spawn Has to find

Martin Sheen And it's so epic He jumps down With two guns And he's like firing Pch Poo Poo Poo Like that

You know like that And Martin Sheen's like No And uh Oh Remember Angela they kill her. Now, for fans of the comics

like me, Angela actually goes to hell as well and she becomes a like a warrior, a princess. But we won't get that to the sequel. When's that coming? Oh, any time now, any moment now, I've

pre-booked the ticket and everything. I just left 20 quid in the cinema. Like, that's for Spawn. Spawn, too. Don't worry, I've adjusted for inflamed. worth every penny. So, also there's some old cunt, right?

And he's like kind of, Hello, Spawn. You think you're the only spawn. There's been spawns for generations. And I'm an old wizard. And I will teach you the ways you you must learn to control your power. And he... Sounds pretty dumb.

No, he isn't, yeah. He actually, he's an Irish actor. He worked with Samuel Beckett. He was like, Samuel Beckett was gay. I want spawn Finally My life has been leading up to this And then

Martin Sheen Wants to release a virus That will kill everyone Yeah What does he get out of that Power Then I won't have to wait in line At Disneyland

I can go on space Mountain all I want My God You diabolical Yeah And what happens then? This is a lot of like, you know, like the violator is driving a truck. He's like, you can't get me, Spawn and Spawn can,

oh, Spawn can, I think, like, make a motorbike appear. Spawn's got all sorts of powers. Right. He can, like, shoot chains out. So who does the violator work for then? Uh, the devil. But I thought Spawn came from the devil. Yeah, but they want to train Spawn to be like an evil soldier.

But Spawn has rebelled. Ah. And he's like, I won't work for you, Satan. And at the end, he goes to hell and he fights Satan. Okay. And, uh...

Raps him. No, no, that'd be too epic. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's also in the sequel. Let me tell you. Well, can you do it so, like, just to hurry up on this, okay, because it's not a spawn episode. You're getting bored, I can tell.

Your eyes are glazing over. Yeah, yeah. You're passing out. Well, you know, yeah, I haven't seen it, so it's hard for me. Seale. I'm just going to give me a second there. Okay. Oh, yeah, I'll keep talking about the movie that I haven't seen or barely

know anything about. But I remind you of the fat, smelly demon. No, only your personality. Oh, okay. No, wait, you watch the film because he's funny. Like, John Likwazamo is the best part of the film. John Likazamo is very talented. He kind of never got

a fair shake. To be honest with you, I'm kind of annoyed because he's such a good violator. Yeah. Like, he really captures the kind of essence of him in the comics. And I really wish, Michael J. White, you know, he's good, but he doesn't get much to do. But the violator, like, you know sometimes you see like a movie and you're like, oh, just let the guy riff there. It's embarrassing. This is like, let him riff and he's great.

Let him cook. Yeah, exactly, yeah. So I wouldn't, you know what? I take this compliment. Okay. I start calling yourself. Yeah, it's James, the Violator Cadman. That's right.

Yeah, the women will love that. You know why they called me to violate a sweet ache of me? You're going to love you. Why don't you fucking walk away from me? A little hoo-uh. Oh, fuck you, I got a broken bottle here. You know where it's going to go? So the movie didn't do well.

Right. Okay. But here's the thing. You directed it actually? Some cunt. Okay. No one famous. Yeah, yeah.

I don't think he did much after it. The soundtrack's fun. Yeah. It's all guys you like, you know. Yeah. It's all 90s, you know, New Metal and all that. Well, new metal didn't really come around until the late. 90s, early 2000.

Well, it's all... Or a spawn. I would imagine... Nine-inch nails and all that. Yeah, that's more industrial. Yeah, well, sorry, sorry, it's industrial. Oh, I don't like this. I don't like this at all, yeah. This is like, you know, when I correct you

and Doctor Who stuff? Yeah, yeah. Oh, the shoes on your foot now. How does it feel? Oh, I don't like this. Yeah, yeah. By the way, so Spawn wasn't that successful, but Spawn, the comic is still going. Okay.

Or of 300 issues. Now, I am not an avid reader. of Spawn. I've read some early issues, but that's it, all right? There's one fun issue where there's a dad, he was raping his children, and then Spawn comes along and beats him up.

Spawn's life, let me show you how it's done. Hold up. But it's interesting because I learned this from my old pal called the Via later. So I didn't really know what was going on the last 300 issues with Spawn. So I did a bit of a Wikipedia

kind of like search. Yeah. To be like, what's going on with Spawn? Now, Spawn is a black guy, all right? Sure. And, you know, it's kind of fucked up. Spawn Lives Matter? No, no, it's kind of fucked up what he does, all right?

So, we reveal Spawn's first kill. Okay. And it turns out Spawn actually, his girlfriend was pregnant before the daughter. Right. And Spawn battered her so hard you to miscarriage. Yeah. And that was his first kill. Oh.

It's kind of a bit fucked up, isn't it? It's pretty dark, yeah. It is really dark, yeah. Yeah. And then it turns out that, you know, the miscarriage. it's in hell and she comes back to life and she's a naked

18 year old and uh oh yeah and then she's like I she bades in virgin blood that's fucking weird no it's not okay sorry

you're right it's cool oh and also we find out that spawn is two brothers and one the brother is like the weakest one or I used to like play with this man

who was like 50 years old who'd like come around just like hey you want to play with me it's a cool guy you know he saw oh this young fella has no friends

I'll be his chum it's been a good deal it's like Mary Poppins so Chim chimney chimmy chum chiminy Supercalifagalifagilistic Expeiaadocious

even though the allegations are quite atrocious If you hear the words of it It's always quite percocious Supercalifragilistic XBialadocious That's you in court Look

I've got an umbrella The jury will disregard the statements from the man dressed as the chimney sweep. Oh, chuffy that governor! Chim chimney, chimini, chimmy. Yeah. Nonsense.

What else have we spawned? Oh yeah, so anyway, it turns out his brother got molested, all right? Sure. But then his older brother killed the guy. Killed the pito. Yeah, yeah. So it's like, it's real dark and fucking twisted. Yeah, yeah. You couldn't handle it. You'd be calling the police. I'd be, yeah. I'd be like,

Turn on my night glide, even though it's during the day. Oh, I'm scared. I don't feel safe. Mommy, mommy, I need some of the dogs, annex. Oh, can I change the topic completely, all right? Please. I let myself down this week, all right? I was farming, all right?

And I was like, I want some listen to. And I had a little look. And turns out, Anthony Coomier has a new show on the radio. Yes. He's now, I can't get over this. He's on news talk. this is what Pat Kenny leads it and coming up now

Anthony Kumia I like how you act teach me your ways so he is a new radio show on like I think it's like just a random New York it's like WBNCB

or like New York all right so it's during the day he's just him yeah no guess or anything and it's very like every 10 minutes

he has to take a commercial break right and it's so weird here in Anthony Kumia, like, he can't swear. He just has to be... What, an asshole, but, like, he's still being his lovable self. Okay. So, this is

the first episode, okay? The very first episode, this new show, is this like, you know, truckers and old people listening this, all right? Yeah. How are you getting on? Yeah, New York City. I don't live in New York anymore. I live in North Carolina now. I had to leave New York because it's such a crap hole.

Let's say crap hole, right? Yeah, yeah. I tell you, it's... A bunch of silly billy. running around and nincompoops emphasis on but like so he's like

yeah just walk around and think about what this country was and what this country is and what this country's becoming I went to a restaurant there

lovely restaurant with my lady friend and we're at the bar she's ordering off the kids menu as she is entitled to do I'm at the bar

waiting for a table to be free there's an old couple in front of us and they're old you know, and we look at each other and we know if a table's free, they're going to get it first

because they're older and they were here first. That's common courtesy, all right? And that's what you don't get anymore. Like, you know, you get these animals coming in. Literally, he says animals, again. These animals, these parasites come in, all right? They come in, no common curse. Does it take the table?

So basically he's getting angry because an imaginary black guy took the table. In this scenario that he's made up. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And he's just like, you know, and, you know, so that's like,

but like he says that, right? And he's like, anyway, that's like 10 minutes. Okay. Right, well, we want to take a little break there,

guys, we're back after this. And then like, what's going to happen next? Yeah. The next segment, okay, he's like, these plane crashes,

you get all these plane crashes happening, you know? Like, I saw a video of these guys and there's like a plane crash and there's one guy, you know, he's just,

he's just standing there on the wing, doesn't get off the wing. Tell you, some people are so stupid. And I was like, well, I'm sure he's probably waiting for like, you know, a ladder or something, you know, or a slide. Or he's just panicking. I don't know, but he's like, and you know why?

D.E.I. That's why all these planes are crashing. D.E.I. It's like, oh, diversity. Oh, should we get the good white pilot? No. This is funny. He's just doing his regular stuff, right?

Yeah, yeah. But then the bit, I was like, this is madness, all right? He was talking about Bill Burr. Oh, shit. It's like, Bill Burr making fun, crying over Elon Musk. Crying because he did a Nazi salute, he didn't do a Nazi slew, all right? Bill Burr knows this, okay? He's just complaining, all right?

He's completely sold out to liberals because of his man-wife, all right? Yeah, yeah. But he was like, look, Elon Musk, all right? He came from South Africa, all right? So, you know, South Africa, use of apartheid. now they don't have apartheid and it's a crap hole South Africa is a crap hole

Anyway back after these breaks After these messages Is there ever any music Well I'm listening to the podcast version So I'm sure like just like Welcome to the jungle Or everything like that Yeah exactly

You're gonna die We're on the highway to hell If we vote the Democrats back in he's just cutting in the song. It's just really sad because there's no one to bounce off so like it's not funny he's not really trying to be funny

even there's a bit where like he did like Alex Jones impression just kind of like yeah just listen people listen people that's like Alex Jones oh they're making frogs gay anyway and that was it

and old Anthony would have done like a whole bit about that like oh they're making frogs gay and then they made you know he's doing something funny like they made Elton John gay, you know, you'd make it a bit silly so you can enjoy it.

Endo dice clay, they'd make him endo dice gay! Oh! That's very good. You should be his writer, his ghost writer. I have a... Call them animals again. Really, put a little bit of stank onto this bloody, a fucking animal. Is this like,

is this like kind of sad, kind of old guy who's had multiple heart issues? Alcoholic, domestic abuser, child and like we love it all right but I don't care

if you're funny all right you know me but I look past politics I'm a ride or die bitch I'm O&A until I die

yeah whip them out Wednesdays yes but it's just like yeah anyway and then another bit like no jokes at all it's like

and then you know Anthony Bolton came out that idiot and he's like Trump doesn't want it just wants to appease Russia well what's wrong with peace alright I always think

Russia's kind of like the monster in the closet and the little child is like oh daddy's a monster in the closet it's Russia and the government is the dad who's like oh son we'll save you from the monster and the child thinks the dad's great but there

is no monster it's like Anthony's in the closet you know Anthony's like When you're only teenage girls there Being like, oh, there's a man in the closet There's a radio DJ in the closet He isn't there So the parents shouldn't look Shouldn't get involved

Don't you know Don't buy into her delusions You know Don't encourage her But like at least have a guest Or someone you know It's just sad I know you had a co-host

Archie Lang for a while Didn't work out He had Dave Landau for a while Dave Landau left Is Dave Landau again Just some comedian Yeah it's this

you said a lot of people that would come on the compound media but they wouldn't stay for long I don't even think compound media's thing anymore oh maybe it's not I think they merged

with sad how I know this you know I actually bought stocks no I think they merged with censored media which is Gavin McGinnis's thing oh okay it's really fucking

who's watching this shit I hate Gavin McGinnis so much who's watching all this shit you know who's like oh my god they're merging to this like Batman Superman

oh my dude I'm gonna rip a bong hit and just chill out with my favorite dudes they said it oh if you pay the you know

the super Patreon tier it's just N words yeah nonstop N words if you pay for cameo he'll call any relative of yours the N word

the end tier yeah I just like they must still be popular like you're still earning money you know have you even

been watching, I've been really laughing all the Bill Burr stuff, like all these people going after Bill Burn out. Yeah, what seems that people are really, like what has he actually, has he, he hasn't changed his no, no, like, he's doing the exact same thing he's always gone. The exact same thing. So like,

yeah, it's funny because he's just like, hey, this Elon Musk guy, he's a fucking idiot, you know, with dumb face. Yeah. Uh, fuck billionaires. All right, that's it's like, for years he was always like, I remember like him talking about like, on Conan talking about this, you kill the Nestle executive yeah yeah yeah and we all laugh with that right but now all these guys who are all called like you know

the supreme gentleman or you know like the uh you know um you know the lib-tard uh destroyer lib-tart destroyer okay he's got like a fedora on okay the titty-loving time lord oh my god that's perfect yeah yeah cut that out thought you'd like that really got me I'm picturing the merch now yet but anyway like some guy he'd be like look at this video he is crying over

crying over he's so you can tell his career's fucked he's done he's losing followers no one's going to like now that he's made fun of Elon no one's going to like him

all right and yeah like all like some dumb con it's like yeah Bill Burr's fall off needs to be studied it's like what are bad he's

more popular and successful than ever also the amount of comments about his wife is insane but they're acting like he met his wife last year yeah and Nia Ockler like you know and he was like and now he's on stage but like I fucking love Camel Harris it's unbelievable I love her I'm what dudes for Harris

come on let's get let's get a dog sisters am I fucking safe space over here he's like that but he's not but like man some of the stuff on Nia's insane you know oh yeah big Mike Nia you know oh yeah he married that fucking man I guess we know

who wears the pants in this relationship probably bends him over and it's also it's funny when it's like you know some guys like yeah he's so gay that Nia probably

were a big beautiful black cock where he bends him over and pounds him and he's loving it and he's like put your fingers in my mouth and he just comes all over him and he's like

thank you daddy yeah oh I'd hate that hashtag go won't go broke yeah well I think because there was that video of her flipping off Trump like when was that like last year

but yeah I don't know it's just a bunch of fucking maga retards like oh Burr sold out like here's thing if you were like I don't think Bill Burr is funny anymore or like oh he's going after like Elon Musk that's lame but they are all these guys

like you know it's like these guys like they're in battle station you know and it's like, okay, Bill Burt, look at the video, him making funny, he's crying, he's probably pissing himself. Wait, why didn't they keep saying he's crying? He's not crying. Okay. But just lying, all right? But it's like

their fans don't care. And I could be like, if you watch the video, he's not crying, so. Was it his latest special? No, he's just on, like, he did, on a podcast he was talking about Musk and like on Jimmy Fallon. He was like, and this fucking guy, you know, he's fucking crazy.

you know and like all the everyone's lucky he's visibly pissing himself there is a line of urine going down his little skinny jeans you can still see all the black jizz soaking all that nea black jizz soaking over his asshole and just that all right it's not like he was like guys let's stop for a minute we've all had our fun in games here but Kamala needs her help now more than ever I'll put the link in the description you can doing it right here she needs us guys go she was there for us in our darkest hour it's only right we return the favor yeah is it's funny like people are so like fucked about it like it ruins like you know like anthony coomia is like you know like billber is dead to me and stuff but like they have

hated each other for years yeah well i don't think anthony cumia is like easy to be around no no you know he's just drinking and beating women and watching Seinfeld It's a good show. It's a good show. Oh, yeah. One second there, one second. All right. I haven't watched the new Bill Burr special.

It's on Hulu, I believe, but yeah. It's weird, the amount of people that are, like, going after him and saying that he sold out and blah, blah, blah, you know. He does, he makes a joke about Israel. Okay. Yeah, yeah. It's interesting, you know, you know, about them killing, you know, civilians and children all there. Sure, yeah. Oh, that's actually too far now.

Words have power, Mr. Burr. You see they're burning... I'm not... I'm going to burn my copy of old dads. See how you like that? Yeah, you make fun of for old dads and you all get behind that. Yeah. But you see, they're burning Teslas.

Who? In America, people just burning random Teslas. They're protesting outside Tesla stores. So, if you park your Tesla outside of Starbucks, somebody will just set it on fire. That's what they're doing, yeah. I don't think... You're not allowed to do that,

People are doing it. It's kind of funny in a way. Is it? I think it is. Especially when there's a child in size. Oh, okay. There's a dog on a child. Officer, I thought if you crack a window.

Well, yeah, they're like, and apparently Trump wants to bring in a thing where it's, like, it's a hate speech in a way, you know? Yeah. So you can't, it's like. Here's the thing with Elon Musk and Trump, is Musk actually appointed any role in the cabinet? Like, is he of any official capacity or? she's just there for good vibes. Good vibes, really. Yeah. And if I was being cynical, I imagine Trump probably keeps him

because it's like a good kind of like, you know, look at him. You know, it's like a good kind of distraction in the way, you know? Yeah, I mean, because he's going around on ketamine with a chainsaw, I am becoming. Yeah, yeah, with his child there. It's just like the most spastic, cringeworthy,

like, I just don't understand. I guess is Trump just using him as a human shield? Like, everyone focuses on him. It's also funny, like, both him and Kanye are both having public arguments with their women, with their ex-wives about their children and, like, posting the actual text and stuff. Yeah. Where it's, like, say, with Grimes, like, please don't put her child in the White House, you know. Don't have him on camera and stuff.

And he's like, uh, my people will talk to your people, you know. How many kids does Musk have? 14, I believe. That's fucking mental. Most of them are artificial, like, in vitro, like. Like a lot of them It's like, I like you Can I send you my comb?

He doesn't have sex with him What? Yeah That's so weird Yeah Sex is disgusting But I have transcended Beyond sex

Wow People still have So then How does What How does he get his rocks off then? Oh, You even want to know, pal

I do I do You know what I will say Because I feel bad For saying You look like John Likizamo

All right yeah So I will say Thanks for reminding me I think you have a better musk like S&L cannot crack musk all right you are better musk than like that's gonna make me feel better, huh? Do I dig yourself

out of this school? I'd love to be compared to John Nick was off ah well thank you yeah you know musk he's you just kind of do awkward and weird so they've done like Dana Carvery yeah that was terrible terrible I didn't see the Mike Myers

one though really bad I'll show it downstairs yeah and you have no choice I'm going to make you watch it's okay it's really really bad yeah Mike Myers is he that's the kind of first time anyone's seen him out in public he's sir he's a bit of a

he's a bit of a nomad these days you don't really see you're here from he's working on the pentabreverse oh shit the pentavaverage yeah is he doing another season I hope so yeah and Shrek 5 are we getting Austin Powers 4 I'm

I'm actually co-funding at the moment yeah just going around on the bus, be like, give a bit of money there for Austin Powers for him. It's going to be it's the Michael Myers with the Megan De Stallion. Right, it'll be brilliant, yeah. And Peter Dinklage

is Mini Me because the other one you know, that'd be good. He's gone to Mini Heaven. No, they'd be like, Mini Me is like, actually I'm a human being, and you shouldn't call me Mini Me. My name is Steve. Very good, Mini Me. And then like, you shouldn't call me

fat bastard. I, I just because I'm larger than others doesn't mean you can dehumanize me like so. Good. Oh, thank you, baby. This is a teaching moment, baby. Now I know how to treat people.

And maybe you shouldn't sexually assault all these women. Oh, okay, baby. You've got it. How about no, you crazy Dutch bastard? Oh, fuck. Yes.

Mike Myers is the fucking. We don't need him anymore. They got James Caird. That's right. Yeah. I'm coming for you, Mike. Yeah. I'm hot on your eyes.

Oh, I'll tell you something else I've been watching, all right? I'm watching Blue Bloods. Okay. Yeah. And the Tom Seleck, Donnie Wahlberg show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Blue Bloods gets regularly like 7 million viewers. Very popular.

One of the most popular shows in the US. No one really talks about it. It's still going, is it? Just ended there, like, last year. Right. Like season 12, all right? So, I watched the thing about Blue Bloods and kind of like, you know, like funny episodes, like some guy reviews Blue Bloods, okay? Right, okay.

I didn't really think about Blue Bloods, okay? I was surprised. It really is, like, I'm going to use the term copaganda. Yeah, yeah. Like, the cops and the, like, the whole thing is like, they're a family in the show. Yes. Okay, so they're like multi-generations and they're all cops. Yeah, the Reagan family, okay?

So, like, Tom Selleck is like... They're called the Reagan family? Yeah, yeah. Wow. So Tom Settick is like the head, he's like the granddad, but he's also like the Patriarch. Commissioner Gordon, you know, yeah. And Donnie Wahlberg is like a tough as nails cop who doesn't follow the books, all right? And like, there's always a fucking nerd in it.

So like, this is like, for example, like, you know, some nerd, be like, um... Well, actually, I think the police should follow procedure. Yeah, right, okay? This is the family. We stick together, okay? Following procedure. That's all very good in your little books, all right? This is the streets.

I'm out in the streets you're behind your desk with your little pencil. and you're paid and your little computer. I'm out there risking my fucking life. Yeah, and there's actually one episode where like, this girl cop, a female cop, all right? This bitch cop. Yeah, whore cop. Well, I can say it because she actually rat out on someone.

Oh. So there was a police officer that strangled a guy in Kustian, killed him. Right. All right. And he was like, I'm going to tell someone. And they're like, you don't do that. Officer Eric Marvin.

They're like, you don't do that, all right? We're a family. You don't rat on your family. Even as you break the rules, you don't rat on your family. And then she comes back and none of the cops want to help her. So there's a bit where like she's out in the field and there's like all these guys surrounding her, she calls her backup, no one comes. So she gets shot, all right? Less than learned?

Yeah, and then like some of the cops are like, hey, you know, maybe she deserved it. Yeah. But then she kills a black guy and they're like, hey, not so bad after her. I thought this broad's all right. I thought she was one of these wacky names and, you know, followed procedure, but... There's a great episode that you're talking about, okay? I'm just going to move that again.

Sorry. There's a great episode I watch where Donnie Wahlberg is chasing... Much worse. Oh, is it? Oh, let me just... Okay. Ah, look, good we got on video. So, Donnie Wahlberg's chasing this black guy, right?

Okay. And the black guy starts beating himself up. Ah. Yeah, to trick Donnie Wallerber, right? Yeah. So he's like, oh, that cop. Police brutality, wink, wink, all right? He's doing the fear, like, Marky Mark in fear.

He's beating himself up. And then, so then, okay, the whole plot is then all these black protesters are like, you know, defund the police. And Donnie Wahlberg's like, he did it himself, really? But then this black activist comes along. It's like meant to be like an Alice Sharpton type, okay? And he's like so comedically like the villain. He's like, yeah, I'm going to take down all the police, even though you help all the poor people. and sick people

yeah I hate the police and you know what Donnie Walberg I know you didn't do it yeah and I don't care I just go fucking over the white man

I'm gonna make sure you and all your little cracker babies are gonna be on welfare and then okay so it turns out there was actually a little immigrant boy

all right in the alleyway and he saw what happened and then the black like Al Sharpton type okay, it's like, I want him deported so he can't tell the truth about that evil white man.

Yeah, that's pretty... And then Tom said at the end, okay, Tom Selleck like saves the white boy or I, you know, it doesn't deport him. It doesn't help him either. It doesn't deport him, okay? And, you know, they prove it, okay? And the black guy's like,

oh, you win this round. I tell you, I can't wait to make up more lies about police brutality. Yeah, he, like, flies away like a bat. it's very funny yeah there's a little funny episodes in that and it's just all like you know

no matter what happens the cops are always right and so like around the time of like 2020 and George Floyd and all that do they well they actually made a parallel there because they said

in blue bloods not an issue right not an issue it's just a bit of understanding okay you know you know all that kind of

nonsense okay it doesn't affect blue bloods okay they know they got blue blood in their hearts. Which knew where blue blood comes from, by the way. No. Fun fact. Spain. So blue blood originally came from to distinguish the

bad Spanish from good Spanish. Okay. So if you're blue blood, you're probably from noble stock and you're so white, you can see the blue blood in your blue veins. Ah. Yeah. Because you're not working the field like the other types. Well, your blood is actually blue until

it meets oxygen. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, don't bring science into this. Sorry, sorry. Don't make this racist thing scientific. Yeah, we're all a bunch of smirfs inside, you know. I was going to say. Boy, so we made a parallel.

So in Blue Bloods, police brutality is just a kind of silly thing, all right? Yeah, yeah. But in comparative, it says, so when Brooklyn 9-9 came out, they really bent over backwards to try and be like, you know, hey, we're having fun here, and my name's Jake Peralta. But seriously, racism is bad and institutionalized and we need to do better. They would have a lot of like sad, dramatic crying moments. Yeah, yeah.

Basically like scrubs, like a cop's version of scrubs. Yeah, yeah. Where like Terry Cruz would get like harassed by some white people, you know? Yeah, yeah. And there's some fat white cops like, yeah, we're going to take you down, Pipsqueak. Yeah, look at you, Terry Cruz. Oh, guys, come on. I can't possibly stand up.

to you, fellas. I'm just a nerd. Yeah. I'm going to grab your balls, Terry Cruz. And you're going to love it. Make sure your wife's in the room so she can see. Actually, what time is it? I'm getting a bit paro about the time.

You have to go into town soon. Yeah. I got to return a library book. Hang on. You know, fucking... I got to return my library book. Do you have to do it today? Not today.

Well, then shut the fuck up. I have till the end of the month. It's half four. Oh, geez. I'll probably leave a... very soon after this. That's okay. Well, we need to do the transfer as well.

We can do that, yeah, yeah. Don't tell the people about that. Right, right, right, right. Sorry. Don't peek behind the curtain. The transfer of wealth. Yeah, I'm going to drive in. Okay.

Yeah, I'm going to drive in. What time is the library close? Ah, fuck the library, actually. Yeah, fuck that. Yeah, I have till the end of the month. Don't be a pussy. Don't give them back, dude. They should be paying you to bring them back.

Yeah, what's in it for me? I got returned my history of the GA book. Yeah. Did you read it all? No, I didn't think so. It starts off like 18 something. Yeah. Why the fuck would you?

Do you even watch the guy? No, I read it. I'm like smarter. You know, like I didn't read the Shining. I read the Shining. Do you watch the match? No, I read it. Yeah.

Is there a GAA graphic novel in stock? Possibly one where a Spider-Bad wins the Sam McGuire Cup. Billing-Lin-Lin-N-E-N-E. With the X-Men, you know Yeah Oh yes We're almost there I've no one else to say really

I watch Possessor What the fuck's that It's by I think like Jimmy Cronenberg Oh what The son of David Wait no It's Oh Brandon

Brandon Cronenberg Yeah I heard his movies Are alright actually Yeah it's pretty good You know what No offence to him okay Possessor feels like a very, very good student film.

Okay. Like, very, very good. Right. If it wasn't for Sean Bean showing up, like, it's... What's wrong with Sean Bean? No, no, that's my point. He's like an actual star.

Oh, I see. I'm not like, he ruined it. Yeah. With Yorkshire accent. It makes me sick. Oh, another straight white man. Oh, great. Yeah, that's what we need.

Yeah. Possessor, it's a cool concept. So basically there's these assassins and they can jump into people's bodies. Okay. So, like, it starts off just random black ones. woman is like you know like taking control of right goes into a place and

stabs a guy and then shoots shoots herself wow and then oh no that's the thing you're meant to just shoot yourself and you wake up in the pod oh wow but the whole thing this woman's a bit of a coward so she can't shoot herself she has to death by cop and she has to oh because it's like a pretty traumatic thing even though you're in the body it's like it's still kind of hard to kill yourself yeah yeah yeah and she starts to lose it wow that's pretty cool yeah and then she starts the whole film's about her starting to lose it bit you know because it's kind of hard to like go back and forth and then when she goes home she's like having sex her husband she's thinking about all the kid murder she's done

stuff oh yeah it's like life doesn't feel real anymore she only feels alive when she's in someone else's body that's pretty cool and then she starts like yeah it's good concept now and it kind of goes doesn't really have that kind of really cool like kronenberg next level yeah it's kind of like you know it's a interesting concept it's kind of you know it reminds you of like a Manchurian candidate Yeah It feels like You do a very good

Network show If you kind of like Change it a bit Like not murdering But it's like You know You go in different bodies And solve crimes

Yeah Like a quantum leap Kind of dumb Network TV show You could do that year Yeah Yeah Oh fuck

I watch queer as well Oh we have no time I watch queer Oh we do Go on I watch queer Daniel Craig Oh the William S Burroughs

Adaptation Yeah how was it I've heard it's not good not great you know speaking of Kronenberg Kronenberg did

naked lunch Oh yeah Yeah and like I've never seen that actually is it good I watch it years ago I can't even judge it properly I think it's interesting

I can't I was like I'm not gonna watch it till I read the book And then I never read the book So I just didn't watch it Kind of sums up my life It's a catch twine too

Which I'm not gonna watch To read the book But yeah So it's just like It's a bit too it's not weird enough it's not sad it's not disgusting enough

it's very nice looking you know Craig Craig's very good in it yeah but again I'd rather like he's kind of like you know he's a bit of junky

in it but I'd like see him like more fucked up yeah and like more kind of like vomit and shit and there's a few bits

of CGI where I was like ah that's not yeah why what like what were they using CGI for uh like drug hallucinations

and stuff yeah I was like man less is more like with naked lunch it's all like practical and it's weird like you know like Cronenberg he probably got like some fucking

cow fetus or whatever you know he like he loves that kind of he's very good that gross shit alright whereas this is like oh it's a CGI thing all right it is it's

you're just not as invested yeah like it's the same with always like when it's just purely CGI it's like I can't even and they also do they do a bit of a fucking spoilers

here to do a bit of a space odd he's gay in it they do a space all as they think the end where he's like old and seen the future seen the power. It's like a little bit trippy but not trippy

enough. They play a lot Nirvana in it even though it's set in the 50s and it's like you know I get it it's like you know oh crazy isn't it you know but it's like tree Is they trying to say only queers listening to Nirvana? Why I

Hora? You're ragamuffin. It's like three Nirvana songs in a roll. Nice. Which ones? I don't know. I thought. come as you are yeah you know what that's called no come as you are ah you got it and then

smells like teen spirit the weird owl version the improved version if you asked me those other sad sacks tucked themselves too serious and then Amish paradise oh weird

oh god what a My baloney Eat it Eat it A whole career Based on that Which is like I respect it Okay but it's so funny

Like the amount of people Like all the concede Like Jimmy Fallon Like Lynn Manuel Miranda Like I worship at the altar Of Weird Al When I first heard You know

I collapsed to the ground I started crying I was like nothing well Like Mozart I heard the angels sing like Gabriel himself Yeah Well the guy you did

I'm fat Wait which one was that Oh I'm bad Yeah I'm fat I'm fat It's mostly food based Yeah a lot of food stuff

A lot of you know What was the other white and nerdy Instead of rolling dirty White and nerdy Got I got so white and nerdy Keen peeler in that Really? Yeah yeah

Are you sure about that Brian That's weird out and even weirder I see Key and Peel Key and Peel were on the bus James and they took me money

I was like Oh he is and it's to fund Keanu too aren't you That's PJ and Jim Brian Okay Almost at the hour there Oh it's yeah

15 seconds Sorry guys I'm not very good At time management No I should have Yeah I don't get a bit weird

I was actually recording Shout out to James Moore And I was recording an episode to him Yeah I was kind of panicking during that. I wanted to get... Like, what happens if you get there 10 minutes late?

They're not going to tell you to not flyer, you know? Who gives this shit? Oh, I hide the bruises, you know? Maybe somebody should start beating you, you know? Put a bit of manners on you for once. Well, that's the hour there, guys. On that sherry note. Well, before we go, anything else I want to talk about?

I want to talk about the John Mullaney show. Okay. Next week. Oh, I'm not going to talk about it. No, no. Do we have time? Because actually there's some stuff I'd like to break up if you're, you know, I've kind of been struggling lately, brother, and I can really use her help, you know,

just I need somebody to lean on, you know. You got a friend in me. So, oh, what are we going to talk, something that you want to watch. Telemarketers. Yeah, we're going to talk about telemarketers next week. Any kind of film we could watch? Probably is. Brian, I'm sure we'll figure it out.

Anyway, goodbye, guys.