Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Episode 269 : I Dream of Ed Gein

Episode Date: October 18, 2025

Hitchcock has a massive head and other observations

Okay. So yeah, what kids say six, seven. And it's in reference to some song by Scrilla, I believe, is his name. Oh, you've done your research. Oh, I have. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've really got your finger on the pulse. I like to know what the kids are up to. Hey, Kate. Is a red flag. I don't think you should. No, no, it's not. I think it's pretty cool and definitely normal. No, I only know because he was on the Matt and Shane podcast. Who? Scrilla. Who is Scrilla? He's the guy. Is that Screthex? No, no, it's not. Is it a white guy? Scrilla X is a nerdy white guy

Scrilla is very much not a white guy Oh my goodness And he had a song called Doot Doot Yes, it's as cool as it sounds And there's some line in it Where he goes six, seven And now kids say it

But the whole thing is like They do it because they know Adults will be like What is six seven? What does that mean kids? They know all the James Cattons Of the world like, what are you young fellas up to there?

But you shouldn't be talking to him No, I have to talk to them I have to It's investigative journalism I'm like Louis Taru And six seven Surely that's not a reference To my penis size

Because if it is You're going to be very disappointed Six seven So what? It's six inches Seven inches girt Yeah So it's all a

It's the whole brain Roth thing But they do Kids do it because they know It'll just annoy adults Because the adults Don't know what they're talking about That's why I don't let kids anyone near me. Okay.

They want to get at me. I have to lock the door. They're like, oh, hello, Brian, come out to play. I'm not falling for that trick. Because the kids want me to come out to play. And I'm playing with them. And the guards pull up and it's like, no officer, they want to me to play. It's not right kids.

The kids are like, who are you? I'm like, come on, kids, six, seven. Like, what do you mean? Yeah, you'll be doing six or seven years behind bars, pal you nunts. Get in the party wagon. it's giving yeah anyway

look we got stuff talk about this episode right no messing around okay stop trying to be hip with the kids never I can't help it

dude I'm just you know I'm young at heart you know not my actual heart it's uh I've been told I have the heart of an 83 year old smoker

but hey well look we got a lot talk with this episode all right oh do we oh yeah we do yeah oh someone

what were you good we just we were watching I'll tell you what, I'm kind of flustered. Could you watch the film Steve there? Yeah. And by watch the film, he watched about two minutes of it. Yeah, yeah.

But I liked it. You turn it on and walk to the shop and came back. It's like, well, I'm ready to write my letterbox to review now. Underwhelming. You know, it was weird. I found it hard to follow the story because I wasn't watching it. And the filmmaker should take that into account. Well, you know what's weird.

I went to the shop, actually. Oh, yes. I walk past Paddy Power. Yeah. They're playing Judge Judy. in there. Right. That's what they're watching.

Okay. And who... You get to bet on whether she'll go with the black guy or the other black guy. No, I don't know. What does that even mean? It's a free episode. Sorry. Sorry.

Judge Judy's racist. Not me. And cut. Okay. Yeah, all right? We're going to move on from that, right? Your awful Judge Judy comments. Sorry.

Is she still alive? She is? A very wealthy woman. Oh, is she single? I'm not sure. Ready to mingle. I'm not sure. possibly. Would you be jealous if I was like James?

Imagine you came downstairs and Judge Judy's there wearing my t-shirt and nothing else. I'm like, oh hello James. Permission to approach the bench, Your Honor. Well, that's good, yeah. Let me think of a legal term. Well, you know,

you know, probably like jury. This is it. This is the process, folks. this is the craft in action this is how the sausage gets made so you say approach the bench yeah all right so that's like approaching her

you just talk with something else for a minute let me just can I will I say another one or maybe without upset you have you got another one have you got a few

that's not fair that shouldn't be allowed you're not playing by the rules write some down and pass them over to me we'll go on see some more then Permission to treat the witness as hostile, Your Honor? I don't know. I don't know if they actually say that.

Anything you say can be held against you? Uh-huh. I'll be held against you. No. I'll hold you in contempt. Oh, yeah. Move on from this. Yeah, you shouldn't have brought that up, actually.

Sorry, yeah, I didn't. I didn't, though. Oh, look, so I watched a very interesting film this week. I watched House of Dynamite. Okay. which is a new Catron Bigelow film Right She hasn't done a film in a while

She's not related to Deuce Bigelow I'm right about that Is her name Bigelow? Does I make that up? She's married to James Cameron I think it is Catherine Bigelow So her last film was Detroit Which no one watched

Oh yeah Did you watch it? No Okay I heard of it though Yeah I didn't watch it either But this film now It's been released

In cinemas It'll be on Netflix soon It's like a Netflix film All right Okay It is very simple It's basically a nuclear missile Has been launched

It's going to hit Chicago Right You got 18 minutes What do Jack off three times Go Only three Hey put a bit of Judge Judy on

I could make it to double digits I reckon you know Yeah So we follow I got my fit bit going One last bit of exercise For the end A bit of card

before I meet my maker He died He died doing what he loved Yes sir So we follow different branches Of the American government All right So like the people who are like

The situation room You know Right The people have to go find the president Like you know there's a guy Who's got a briefcase Yes And his whole job is basically

When things go to shit We open the briefcase And we have the plans For like nuclear war We follow him We follow some regular soldiers who, like, their job is, like, monitor everything.

We follow, like, people in FEMA, like, different sections of government, right? And basically how... You know, the funny thing is, it's very real, which almost makes it feel a bit, like, antiquated now. Okay. All right, because it's all very real and professional.

And in your head, you're like, they wouldn't be that professional. You know, people would, like, you know, like you said, to be jerking off, to be, like, just grabbing tits. Trump's cabinet, you know? Yeah, yeah. It's Linda McMahon and fucking.

RFK Jr. Yeah, exactly. Well, I think nuclear missiles actually cause autism. This might be the cure to autism actually, now that I think about it. If you tuck Tylenol, maybe radiation will cure your autism.

Circumcision causes nuclear war. And Cheryl Hines, she's so lovely. She's like, yes, I support my Bobby. Do you see Cheryl Hines on the view? No. Yeah, yeah. And she was defending him nonstop. She's a ride or die.

She is right or die. Yeah. And when she dies, she should be dug up. Yeah. And he's cheating on her nonstop. Of course he is.

Yeah, yeah. He's R-FK, you know? Yeah, how can you say no? Yeah, yeah. He's like Springsteen. I'm about to bust. Oh, fuck. Wow.

I wonder what he sounds like when he comes. Normal. Oh, God. Hey, finally. He comes just like a minute of like, Hey, me, me, me, me, me. Yeah, baby. All right.

Thanks for that. I just busted a nod like. a motherfucker man, All right man, I'm a, I'm a holl at you later, girl. All right, be... Hello, and, oh, yes, I'm ready to the press conference. This is gibberish, isn't it? No, I don't know.

I think my mother talked too much Tylenol, which was pregnant with me, you know? And God bless her for it. Yeah, yeah. So anyway, so the missile is coming, and it's really fun, because it starts off, it's Jason Clark. He's, like, the top guy, all right?

He's like, okay, people, so we're getting some issues here on the monitor. We'll just check it out. Probably not, and, yeah. Oh, oh, all right. So it's a... Yikes. Oh, yeah, it's probably just a test we weren't told about. It's not a tester.

Okay, right. Well, come on. We train for this, people. It's the protocol. We're going to launch the missile. It's going to take out the nuclear weapon, and then we'll be okay. So, yeah, hey, easy is pie. And, oh, we missed.

All right, okay. Do we have another one? no all right we don't have another one really feels like we should have another one that was it we did on big max that's what we spent the budget on big max and adderall okay geez well oh boy well okay and the best part of the film is um when the guys come in the security guys like sir we're going to come with us now and where we go we're going to the bunker all right okay um okay you guys you know stay calm I'm going

oh fuck oh shit fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck there's like a trail of piss coming down oh no no no my god oh my god

oh my god I wish I didn't recognize the state of Israel so many times I'm definitely going to hell oh fuck stay stay calm people

it's gonna be fine so basically the guys come and it's so great it's very subtle okay so like sir you're coming with us now

someone I was like, are we coming too? It was like, no, you can stay here. Pulls out the gun. Why don't you tell me, motherfucker? You feel like going somewhere right now? Or you feel like staying where the fuck you are? Yeah, so they put Rebecca Ferguson in charge. And she's trying her best to be like, you know, not shitting herself.

Sure. And then we cut to like FEMA and over there again, it's like the head of the woman in charge. Okay. They're like, yes, you're going to come with us now. Why? No, just shut up. right, we have ordered, we will drag you if we have to, all right? Our job is to bring you and no one else here.

Right. And the whole time, it's a lot of, like, you know, talking amongst people and they're like, no, no, who did this? And they're calling up Russia and Russia's like, we didn't do this. And they have to like, really like, well, you know. It was on me. Yeah. Yeah. And you said the nuclear code.

It wasn't me. You know? Yeah. Do they do that? They don't do that. A bit of fun. A bit of liberty, you know. It wasn't many laughs in this film

It was all very serious I was like come on Someone's slipping a banana or something Yeah Do a bit of like You know Get Groucho Marx there or something So Russia is kind of

Wasn't us I'm like well We have a There's a nuke we're monitoring And the nuke's gone now Seems to be flying towards us No mistake All right

Well If it hits us We're going to have to Hit you back No If you do That will shoot you. Well, you've already shot us.

So it's coming from Russia, then? They don't know. Okay. At the end, we don't get a full answer. It might be North Korea, it might be Russia. Russia's annoying anywhere, right? Okay. And I didn't, so Idris Elba is the president.

Oh. President is Dris. Stringer Bell. Yeah, Stringer Bell is the president. And they are like, will we go to the president? We can't contact him. What was really funny is, all this is going on, all right?

Like, you know, it's literally death con. This is the apocalypse, basically, all right? The missile is heading to Chicago, all right? Interesting choice of target. Yeah, yeah. What are they going to be Washington, you know? I don't know, maybe the geography is closer, maybe. Okay.

Look, I don't know. I haven't really sat down and looked into, like, a nuclear missile. I guess I'm the loser in that sense, you know? Yes, I'd agree with that. Every growing boy should do that, you know? It's like playing catch at your dad. Yeah. All right.

So, it was really funny as well. there's a press conference, like, uh, miss, you know, the woman who does the press conferences, the journalist, like, oh, miss,

is it true that there's like some kind of like, uh, issues going on? Um, you know, we're getting reports and some kind of like, maybe something's heading towards Chicago.

Well, actually, uh, and again, the guy's like, come and go with us now. I was like, oh, Jesus. Yeah.

Uh, but they find the president. Okay, he's at a charity, it's like the my pet goat moment. He's at a charity basketball game with Angel Reese. Wow. Yeah, yeah.

So he's with Angel Reese and a bunch of, like, kids, okay? And literally the security guys come. They grab Angel Reese and leave the president there. You're way more important. The WNBA is such a great organization, you know. She had Victoria's Secret. Did she? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. So the guys saw that, like, we need her in the bunker. Nice. Yeah. So they grab, leave all the kids there, be like, goodbye, Mr. President. He's like, fuck you, kids. So the president's in the chopper As he's flying off like

Hey, what do you want to be when you blow up Sike? And then he flies away You know? I don't get the chock, Mr. President. Oh, give it 20 minutes. You never will. So he's in a chopper, right? And all these guys, all the head security

are all talking to him. And it's very methodical, which I liked. Some people thought it was boring. I liked it. with the briefcase, okay, essentially like, okay,

Mr. President, here's a color-coded thing of all the options, all the options, option A, B, C, D, you know,

and here's kind of list of all, like option A, the casualties with that, to kind of what will happen next, okay,

it's all very organized, like, something that's like, again, like nuclear apocalypse. We got lovely, it's just very, like,

clinical and non, like, emotionless kind of. Lovely, look, It's on comic sands as well. You know, it's a bit quirky. It's like, what are we going to do, Mr. President?

And he's like, give me a minute, son. This is kind of, this is a big deal. But the guy, I love you. Again, he's very emotional. It's like, what are we going to do, sir? How many people are going to kill now? Come on. Yeah, and he's trying to call his wife, the president.

Right. But he can't really get true to her. He calls his side pace. It's like, meet me in the bunker. No, not the fuck bunker. No, the actual bunker. yeah um so the whole thing is he's like panicked doesn't know what to do alright he's like sir sir sir we need it now we need the option now sir sir you know it's all very tense you know um the one bit

i was like oh it's a bit too movie kind of like schmaltzy spielberg stuff yeah is jared harris is one of the top guys in the military okay so they got him doing an american accent which is all like you know i uh i'd rather he'd say a british person you know but anyway it doesn't I don't think they'd have a British person, like, high up in the U.S. I know, I know, I know, but I'm just very aware that he's British, all right? Okay. Point is, okay, so he's like, yeah, yeah, don't worry. He's got, one second, he calls his daughter.

He's like, hey, honey, how are you? Dad, my therapist says, shouldn't talk to you right now. I'm with my new boyfriend. You got a boyfriend? What? Yeah, I got a boyfriend. But mom, I'm still upset about when mom died. Last, you know, it's like, it's like, well, honey,

hope you, hope you have a good time with your boyfriend, you know, hangs up. She's going to die. Tell mom I said hello. What? Click. Yeah. There's only bit, but it ends, kind of a prick tease of an ending where it's like, Mr. President, what are we going to do?

What are we going to do? And it cuts to black. And the final scene is a bunch of people. Don't stop believe it. If you don't get that, you can go fuck yourself. And the final scene is a bunch of people going into a bunker, essentially, and that's the end. Yeah.

And I get why you didn't show it, but I do kind of want to see the mushroom clouds. Sure, yeah. I want to see the aftermath. I want to see the bodies, you know, the shadows being burnt into the wall. Yeah, yeah. The race of like, you know, ghouls and goblins that are born out of the radiation. All the monsters look like the monster from Robocop running around the place. I want to see that kind of shit

but I can understand why it's going to be serious but I liked it it was fun it's just fun to see people being stressed Are we never find out who launched it?

No more ambiguous Yeah I don't know if I like that Probably Russia I mean it's heavily employed as Russia Okay

I mean the guy was like We didn't do it doing like the Doctor Evil thing yeah One million dollars Okay we're trying to do Austin Powers references

but yeah yeah I prefer to love guru well and that's why we launched the Duke I liked it though like that

before we talk about Ed Gein Ed Gein's the big piece this episode okay when I really quickly talk with some books I'm reading

because I haven't been watching too much stuff apart from the entire season three of Tulsa King apart from that I'm not watching that much at all I should mention Tulsa King

You didn't watch season one or two Just season three Season three, that's all you need Because season three has got Kevin Pollock And like the idea of Kevin Pollock And Stallone Sharing the screen

Oh my God It's like heat You know these two heavy weights together So I kind of skim through season one and two Or I get an idea of what it's about So season one of Tulsa King Sylvester Stallone is kicked out of New York

because he's too tough He's so tough and cool New York can't handle him The five families are like You're two punk rocks And his dick is too big Uh huh So he goes to Tulsa and he takes over like

The weed dealer business, all right Okay Like selling 10 spots Tulsa, that's Oklahoma Yeah, yeah Right okay So he takes over Tulsa Him and Martin Star take over Tulsa

said. Perfect. Like the Crayet Twins. You can't tell them apart. So, season two then he takes on a billionaire weed dealer played by Neil McDonough. Oh yeah. And Neil McDonough

is also working with the triads. Right. So it's Martin Starr and Sylvester Sloan versus the triads. And they easily defeat the triads. Of course. And they earn the triads respect. Because they're also a great warring now season

three they've gone even crazier even bigger season three they've gotten to the bourbon game the bourbon game yeah they're now selling bourbon okay so which is

legal yeah yeah but it's 50 year bourbon so each bottle costs like a million dollars huh but here's the thing uh Robert Patrick yeah he's the bourbon king of Tulsa.

Right. So you can't sell bourbon on his territory. So now they're going up against the bourbon king. Right. And to make even harder for Stallone, he's being captured by the FBI. And the FBI need his help.

Uh-huh. Because he's so cool and tough and strong. Yeah. The FBI swear to God, needs Stallone to take down an IRA agent. What? The IRA are in Tulsa Oklahoma up to their old tricks

you know it makes perfect sense and the FBI needs the loan to take down the IRA this is very fucking stupid no it's not

what you're talking about so it's all angles you've got the FBI to worry about the Bourbon King to worry about and the IRA all together

and but there's still time for comedy as well it's not all drama like just one bit all right very funny so Martin Star has to drop a duffel bag

full of money to these gangsters all right but it's Martin Star okay so I'm laughing already he has a green electric car a little small mini car oh yeah and he runs out of a battery

because he's such a he's such a nerd yeah yeah he's still old and be like yeah he's fucking gay nerds but that was wrong with a Mustang Maybe a diesel engine, you know. What's wrong with you guys? But then Martin Star has to walk there with duffel bag.

But when he drops duffel bag off, he opens it. It's actually full of comic books. Oh. He got his duffel bags mixed up. He had a duffel bag full of comic books. I can see why you related to this so much. Because that's what nerds do. We just have duffel bags full of comic book.

The one that looks the exact seems a money one, right? He's like, oh no. But at the end, okay, he has a fight. actually takes a gun and threatens the guy and he's like a man. He's a badass. Yeah. Touch my fucker comic books! Yeah.

But Stallone and this, all right? I forgot, he's like 80 years old or older. Yeah. He's an old man. But he still, all the women want him. Of course. He's still the toughest guy around. Okay, like he can, like the biggest heavy as possible. He just like, doesn't you have to like hit them?

He just like, one, touch them with a pinky and they, uh, and die. but there's a funny bit in it where Kevin Pollock has a self-driving car and he sends it to get Stallone for a meeting because they're working under cover all right

is he in the FBI? Yeah, Kevin Pollock's the head of the FBI right, okay. So it's a self-driving car so it's a weird thing, it's very funny I don't know if it's meant to be just funny all right, but Stallone gets in it, it and then the doors locked, hey, where is it, where is, what's going on?

And the car starts driving, starts playing gnaws. And for some reason Sloan hates gnaws. They, what the fuck is this? He pulls out a gun and starts shooting the radio. Ah, hey, I'm west side till I die. Fuck this is this cause bullshit. What the fuck. And so he goes to Kevin Pollock, all right?

And they're driving to do some mission, okay? But they get stopped by a cop because Kevin Pollock's driving too fast. and Stallone charms the cop so he doesn't give Kevin Pollock a ticket Kevin Pollock the head of the FBI Yeah yeah

And Kevin Paul said oh God I'm going to lose my license I'm in so much trouble Oh no But then all right Turns out the cop was working for Stallone And this is all ploy To kind of to win over Kevin Pollock

Now I've got blackmail Yeah, I've got you dead to writes A traffic ticket You'll never outlive that shame Now you'll do what I want to do Alright He gets one traffic ticket He's like writes a note to his family

Like goodbye He's got the cyanide pill Ready to go He does the you know like the He's playing like the American anthem You know And like one's final salute And then

And then jumps off the ledge Yeah so it's very silly And there's lots of very awkward comedy You know A lot of it based around Martin Starr It's almost hateful in a way Okay A lot of like you know

Look at the bourbon There's a thing called the bunghole The bunghole Yes the hole in the barrel of bourbon Okay You know you can't jam the thing into the bunghole And pull it out And it's like Martin Starr be like

Hey it's the bunghole What do you say bunghole Look at this guy But you like the bunghole you like up the bunghole You're reaching comic books While you're getting in the bunghole Yeah

And then at the end There's a fight scene Sloan kicks him up to the ass I got him in the bunghole And you'll laugh And Martin starts like It's a part of the barrel Yeah

Fucking Bunghole head over here It's a It's a Taylor Sheridan show Oh I didn't mention Stavester Stallone As somehow he's defeated all the Mafia in New York.

Right. So now they're all out of business. Yeah. So all the Mafia guys work in a coffee shop now. Oh, right. Frank Grillo is one of them. Yeah. Like a hipster coffee shop. It's where to God, okay? It's like very funny. It's then me like, hey, I don't go working a coffee shop

now. Gen X, Gen Z, Jen, what the fuck? And, uh... Yeah, a lot of Taylor Sherton's like, all of his stuff is all about just older guys who are like, oh, What, you probably identify as a, you know, a machiato? Do you want gender fluid in your coffee?

There is actually like a woman who says, I'm lactose intolerant. Hey, what do it is? Oh, forget about it. Yeah, yeah. It's very, like, painful comedy. Yeah. But there's a certain charm to a certain genesis, genesis. The geneseecois.

Exactly, yeah, yeah. yeah yeah there's a certain uh-la-la about the whole thing that i i kind of enjoy yeah i hope it keeps going for another like 10 years i want to see just how far they can push it with stilohan where he's like in like a wheelchair but everyone else's like whoa don't piss off the king you know yeah yeah you want me to take you i'll take you all out and after like awkward cuts it's like it's like 12 guys Sloan's there and then like

he caught away like boom boom biff bamboo and like who else do come on he just dies on camera

yeah but I enjoy I enjoy it for a silliness well that's good and we're getting the spin-off soon there's a spin-off coming yeah Nola King

Nola King yeah New Orleans oh that's Sam L Jackson really yeah wow

so apparently later on the season Sam's gonna come along it's gonna be like a very awkward, like, hey, how you doing? Sam Jackson. Where are you going? I'm going to New Orleans. You can call me

the Nola King. I sure would like to see your fur ventures on Paramount Plus. Something like that, you know, something seamless. Yes, yes. So I will watch more. I didn't watch any more Jimmy Fallon, though. Sorry.

What's Jimmy Fallon doing? Jimmy Fallon's on brand? Oh, shit. I told you about just last week and you've forgotten. I forgot about that. sorry my bad yeah I kind of tried to forget about it

you know like a horrible forget about it yeah there you go all right what are we doing here

Jesus Christ okay I'll move on something else then alright we'll talk about Ed Geen in the minute I'm really the saving Ed Gein

I'll talk about what I'm reading so I'm reading quite a lot actually I'm really enjoying it helps us so because my brain is just so crazy

and twisted yeah I'm just freaking always thinking of deep thoughts. Yes. So reading helps to relax me.

Right. I'm reading real books for once. Not just like coloring books and Doctor Who graphic novels. Yeah, yeah. So this is all real books. I'm reading. One book I'm reading is Long London

by Alan Moore. Oh, okay. So Alan Moore, it's annoying. It's still kind of a graphic novel though, isn't it, Brian? I actually wish he did less graphic novels now because his prose is so good and so fun.

It's very funny the novel that I kind of wish he kind of did less of the graphic because I think like if you had more novels

to be more kind of like well respected with the kind of more kind of snobby side of literary world the intelligentsia yeah people still looked at

oh you do like what like funny books do you like the B no is that it I'll tell you Alan Moore he's a fucking workhorse

because he hasn't done that many novels he'd one novel I think in the 90s called Voices of Fire right And that, I actually have that, but it's, it's, be honest, it's kind of hard to read, because that is all set in Northampton, where he's from. Right.

Over like 100 years. No, way more than that. It starts off with Cavemen and it goes all the way up to like 2003. Yeah, that is more than 100 years. I'm glad you know that. Well, like 200 years, yeah. 250 blumen years long. But the first chapter was written in Caveman speak.

So it's kind of hard to get through that, you know? Really? Yeah. Oh, I thought you'd be able to speak homo erected. Hey-oh. More unerected yet. No, no, Brian. You're ruined my punchline.

Fucking asshole. I had a good punchline. You came along shit on it. Story my life. But he then, his next novel was called Jerusalem. Oh. And Jerusalem, he was writing this for years. It's 1,200 pages.

So it's this huge, big novel, all right? And it's about ghosts and kind of like, again, it's over a long time period. And I think the main premise is ghosts don't experience time like we do. Okay. So a ghost from the 18th century can meet a ghost from like 2017. Uh-huh. Let's say.

And like it doesn't really affect them the way it does for us, all right? Right. So it's like different ghosts meeting different people and then they tell their stories, all right? I think actually Charlie Chaplin's a character in a young Charlie Chaplin's actually character. He did this like 1,000 page book. I was like, geez, that's a lot. He'll probably take easy after that. Yeah.

His next thing he's worked on now is called Long London. It's a five-part series. Each is, they're all tick books, all right? So it's a big, long thing. And it's kind of like, if I had to sell it to you, let's say you're a Hollywood producer. Okay. I've only got a few seconds.

I was like, it's Get Carter meets Harry Potter. Huh. Get Potter. Yeah, exactly. Okay. It's not exactly that, but, no, I'll tell you what, it's Peaky Blinders. But we're magical elements.

So it's like 50s, London, all right? Yeah. And it's like gangsters, but there's also kind of a secret world in London of like wizards and warlocks and stuff. Yeah, all right. But it's very kind of like, you know, there's a Jewish gangster called Jack the Spot.

He's proper like he'll cut you up and stuff like that. And there's a real world character. And like Oswald Mosley, he was the head of the black shirts. They were like a fascist group. Oh, right. That inspired the blue shirts in Ireland. So, like, there's a lot of real people in it.

It's very, it's very hard not to spend the whole thing on Wikipedia. Because there's all the, whenever someone's mentioned, you know for a fact that is someone. Right. And he's kind of want to, like, lock it up. Yeah, but we have to, like, and he's stopped, otherwise I won't be able to follow the plot at all. Yeah, I get you. Yeah, so it's basically about a young boy who, um, his parents died, I think in the Blitz. He's called Dennis Knuckleyard.

Dennis Knuckleyard. Yeah, yeah. and he's like no he's like 18 I think and he lives this old biddy who's like a mad old woman all right and she runs a bookshop

and they live above the bookshop basically all right and he's got he has to go find these books off a dealer all right and he finds one book that shouldn't exist

it's a fictional book the Quran yes I'm with you now okay I'm on with some dark spooky magic that destroys London

oh think about it no so it's a book that's actually from some short story that mentioned a fictional book and it's the real book so something's like it's a book that shouldn't exist

and there's all these gangsters and stuff after it because if you get the fictional book it opens the doorway into the other London with all the wizards and goblins and stuff It sounds a bit silly But it's treated very seriously

You know, like the violence and stuff And it's a very funny bit Actually near the start Where like So it's a book shop It's an old biddy all right And the young boy, Dennis He finds a kind of a nudie mag

Oh yeah It's like oh my goodness Yeah yeah So he brings upstairs all right To do his business And the next day The old lady finds it It's like

Oh you dirty bugger What are you doing with this? Yeah What are you doing with it? He's like Oh, I was good bring it back i swear he's like oh oh i know what you were doing ha ha ha ha well i tell you what enjoy he's like oh that's very awkward okay but then he goes back to look at the the woman and a nudie

mag all right and it's her yes how'd you get it yeah yeah yeah it's you know pretty obvious i couldn't i always crashed the car i like to read when i'm driving sure yeah yeah i was like what and so what she was like a pin-up girl back in the day we find out more than that we find out more about her. She, she was called, uh, uh, uh, you just called her, she lived a, um, a gangster back in day. Okay. She was known for burying people alive. Really? Yeah, yeah. So she, she, she, she knewty girl, she went from nudie girl to actress to gangster. Oh. To bookshop lady. Well, it's kind of like the Katie Price heart, you know. She probably, I reckon, you know, she gets Harvey to go out in the dead of night and snuff out all of her enemies, you know, Peter Andre, but her watch is back.

L-O-U country But I'm enjoying it, all right I'm liking it a lot The other thing I'm reading is La Belle Sauvage Oh Yeah, sounds fancier than it is I'll be honest

Are you familiar with the works of Philip Pullman Who did the Northern Lights trilogy? No Okay, so Northern Lights is basically Harry Potter for kids who read The Guardian Wow It's for smart kids, all right? Okay

You probably read your Harry Potter's, didn't you? Oh, wow! even. What were you reading? Wasn't reading nothing. I was out getting ass and pussy I wasn't a bookworm as a kid. Really? I feel sorry for you. I was into like really terrible 80s action movies

and good ones as well. I watched a lot of Stephen Segal movies when I was a kid. I wouldn't have liked you when I was a kid. You don't like me now, so that tracks. I really looked down on you. I were like, oh, you watched that mindless drivel I call it the idiot box so he wrote these books in the 90s all right

the Northern Lights trilogy his Dark Materials trilogy it got turned to a film in 2007 didn't really do that well and it got turned to a HBO show a few years ago with McAvoy was in it and

Lynn Manuel Miranda Miranda and stuff like that yeah so yeah don't know how that one passed me by all my favorites um so it's basically all right it's set in a parr you want if we spoil this please okay it's set in a parallel universe to ours where the church runs society basically and uh

all people have a little demon with them okay so when you're born a demon appears that's what they call it a demon all right right and it's linked to you okay and when your kid the demon can change shape so you can turn into like a dog, a cat, a robin, whatever, you know, eagle. But as you grow older, your demon kind of settles, and it kind of represents who you are. Okay. So like, for instance, I would probably have something noble, you know, like a, like a little dirty badger. With one eye. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You probably have like a deer or something like that, like a noble elder. A deer. Yeah, well, yeah, something like that. All right. You can talk to your demon.

Okay. So, like, you can, like, have a little chat to your demon, but you can't be separated from your demon, all right? Right. So if you, you know, let's say if you got arrested somehow and they took your demon away physically, all right? Yeah. You would die. Oh. Yeah, you're connected.

And when you die, your demon would die. Almost like an old, like, you know, an old man with a dog? Wait, so everyone else can see your demons? Oh, yeah. Oh. I thought it was just like an imaginary friend kind of thing. No, no, it's there. So like you'd be chatting to someone, let's say you got like your parrot there

right, that's my demon. Oh, okay. Okay, yeah. And you might have a little chat like, what's that? Oh, no, I don't, I think he's all right. Mm-hmm. No, I don't think he's gay. You know, like, uh, what's he saying about me? Yeah. But like, so that's the world. My demon is just Alan Carr. On your shoulder.

Oh, what's that? Yeah, so that's the kind of world okay and then as it goes on we find out they're doing experiments to how do they phrase

it now basically pierce the wall between realities and that leads to the second book is saying our world

right and it's about I think they travel which is a knife they can use to cut through reality

it's like a magic knife all right and then like people from our world come into their world there's a big

battle then in something okay And this is That's what I'm reading now. Right. Yeah. I read them in primary school, by the way.

Okay. But this is a new series now, which is like a sequel series. And in that, all the kids are grown up. So it's like more adult now. Oh, okay. So like,

so the kids one were probably PG kind of. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, so now they're, they're all fucking their own demons. It's like euphoria now, yeah. Oh, yeah. The demons in the cook chair. bed do him over

yeah it's like it's a fucking fox smoking you know and uh and then like it's like it could be anything you know you have a big polar bears your demon it's all as an animal then yeah it can't be anything else you can't be like an alien or a cyberman or something like that you know it has to be uh like a honda civic or optimist brine they're pretty cool yeah or phone box yeah um oh my god yeah uh actually speaking of doctor who all right Wait. Let me just restart this with some exciting Doctor Who news for everyone.

Oh, good. Talk, wait. Yeah, yeah. Now, I don't know. I kind of blacked out there. He was talking about demons and some other shit. I don't know. I'm very weird.

I just hog the show. I'm sorry about that. We'll talk about Ed Gehan, I promise. I know you're salivating. I'm not, you know. Real quick, just some Doctor Who news. All right. There's rumors that the fact.

some missing episodes. Right. Now, for you, it doesn't mean much. No. For me and my community, this is very exciting. Uh-huh. So the way it works is,

there's, I believe, 91 episodes of Doctor Who they're missing. How? How are they missing? Because the BBC didn't record stuff back in the day. Just tape over everything.

Okay. So they found a little episodes because episodes would be sent out to other parts of the world to be broadcast, you know, everywhere from America to Africa, wherever,

And then years later, they found those episodes, okay? Okay. So they recovered a lot of episodes. Still 91 episodes that are just gone. Right. Lost the time. But there's always been rumors of secret collectors. They have episodes and they trade them for big, big money.

Uh-huh. Yeah. So there's a, I think there's a group now called Film is Fabulous. And they are kind of like hunters and preservers of lost media. Like Nazi hunters. but more serious way more serious actually important

yeah they got guns and shit like take out the trash so there is like people in the UK and all the world who've got like secret dungeons alright kind of a bit like nasty memorabilia right

and they have type in the code and they go down they got an episode from like 1964 like oh oh yeah and they like these this is like the black market it's like you know that

take on the internet where you can buy drugs and prostitutes and the... Oh, like the Silk Road. Yeah, this is like the Silk Road for Doctor Who. Uh-huh. Yeah, so the rumor is now that there's a collector with some tapes, sorry,

and they're in the process now trying to negotiate with him. But it's very serious. It's like fucking getting the hostages back in Israel. Why wouldn't he just release them if he's a fan? Would he not just want to... No, but they had to sit on it, you know? I have something you don't. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. That's like something you'd do. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I would be good. I'd release to the public For money Yeah I reckon

You know When your father dies All of like your inheritance Will go towards Buying lost Doctor Who Episodes

You know Worthed it This is for you dad Anyway Let's talk with something You won't talk about Right I don't

You're making it out Like this is My favourite thing Of all time Ed Gein You got your Homemade Football Jersey

With Gein On the back Gein 69 Oh, that's funny. So anyway, so you watched Ed Gein first. Yeah. And you were sending me some interesting images from the show, so I watched it. Yeah.

Really bad. It was terrible. It's a bad show. Everything about it. I'm not defending it at all. When I first heard Charlie Hunnam was cast as Ed Gein, I was like, oh, this is going to be bad. Yeah. And I was right.

He's not good. No, but the thing is, it's all so bad that he doesn't. even like it's not like his performance as stand out as oh it would all be good if it wasn't for him yeah yeah the whole thing is terrible isn't that weird because in all the other previous seasons you had like you know Richard Jenkins

Evan Peters yeah the two guys who played the Menendez twins they were very good Javier Bardems yeah they were all very good no this one is really poor there's no one good in it even good people are

are bad in the show. So, like, what's her name, Metcalf? Oh, Laurie Metcalf. Yeah, they don't want to give her much to do, you know. There's no, I felt it wasn't a great showing. No. You know, you could have a lot more with that character

was the mother's such a big part of the Ed Gein story. Yeah. Tom Hollander, who played Alfred Hitchcock. Oh. He's a great actor, you know, I like him a lot. I didn't even know that was him. He couldn't. The head Yeah. Was crazy. Very terrible Alfred Hitchcock makeup.

I could not. believe how bad it is. Yeah. We've seen a few Hitchcocks. Toby Jones played Hitchcock. Hopkins played Hitchcock. Yeah. And in that,

they kind of like let the guys, you know, they're both, you know, just make him fat. Uh-huh. Even, like, he would lean in to that. He'd do the whole profile thing. Yeah, yeah.

In this, decided to make Hitchcock, all the fat's gone to his head. Mm-hmm. So he's got a massive fucking alien head, like Star Trek. Yeah. And his body is kind of like skinny.

Yeah, like a mace. or something. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's very odd. It was so distra. I actually almost shit myself and I saw it. That was the scariest part.

Not in the show is scary. No. They're not trying to be scary or tense or anything. No. They're going for like, it just, I don't know. I wouldn't even say they're going for a committe. I think it's unintentionally funny in a lot of places. It's very like, we're freaking, oh yeah.

We're pushing it. They're going for just like the very, uh, what's the word? just like over the top grotesque you know in your face like you know it's necrophilia and it's you know

digging up bodies and making it's weird how lamps from people's skin isn't it weird though how it all feels so like I was checking my watch watching like I'm not a fan of necrophilia

yeah but you shouldn't be bored by necrophilia yeah that's what I mean yeah yeah like it's an interesting topic and when you show it it should be like inherently, it's like a bank robbery in a film,

that's inherently kind of like, oh, what the, you know, get the money, you know? It should grab your attention. Yeah, yeah. It's like, but they actually have them just hump in a dead body and I'm like, yawn. Yeah, wake me up with something interesting happens. Yeah.

It's almost impressive. And I wouldn't, if it was just dumb trash, here, I will say one thing, I looked up. So, Ryan Murphy did the first two seasons. This season's not Ryan Murphy. Okay. It's another guy called Ian, who's straight.

Huh. So that's the problem right there. Right. So a lot of fun, kind of trashy gay, edge-lowered stuff in the first two seasons is all gone. Yeah. And they're trying to be more intelligent now, by maybe you're the problem. Oh. Not you personally.

Don't worry, okay? I just mean, like, they're trying to make some kind of point about, like, oh, you like Texas chainsaw massacre and sloyal lambs. Are you any worse than Ed Gein? Think about it. Yeah. Yeah, they're kind of trying to make a point and it doesn't really work. It does not work at all.

Also, back to Charlie Hoddle, like that voice that he does. He became Irish at one stage. When he gets older, he gets proper like, ah, Jesus. Like, Ed Gein didn't talk like that. Hello, Mother. Yes, mother.

Yeah, I don't know. It's kind of like a weird Corbett the Frog kind of voice or something. He's terrible in it. And to make it worse in all the interviews he does, he's like, yeah. I mean, it makes you think, like, who's the real

monster? Mm. Yeah. Like, no, it doesn't. It was very, like, the whole thing was very unfocused as well. Like, it was jumping between timelines, and it was just like, you know, it shows Hitchcock making psycho, and then Toby Hooper

making a chainsaw massacre. Oh, by the way, you mentioned, it's very interrupted there. All the fantasy sequences is so fucking, like, you know, you know, the bit where, we're those, like, Holocaust uh, victims all running? Yes, yeah. That's a pretty bad taste there, right?

Well, because they say that he was obsessed with, what's her name, Ilsa Coke? Yeah, yeah. No, I get what they're trying to do. Yeah. But it's like, I know these guys are not real. I've got to sit there and take it. What, Holocaust victims? All right, Brian, Jesus Christ.

I've listened to him Nick Funte's reason. No, a better example, okay, the Toby Hooper bit where Toby Hooper starts killing people. Oh, yeah, yeah. I am pretty sure Toby Hooper didn't actually kill people He didn't take a chainsaw to people In a shopping mall But we got to sit there and watch it

And I'm like, I get it, yes Oh, it's a chainsaw massacre In Texas I gotta sit there And then it cuts him It was just him thinking it Yeah I'm not

Amazed by this I'm like, whoa I just like all right That scene's over now, thank fuck It seems like when they recreate scenes It's like oh, that's a very good recreation

of like the movies yeah although weird I kind of get why did it but so with let's say Texas Chains on Massacre again

they recreate that scene like pitch perfect where you're almost like is that no it's not but with the psycho shower scene

they deliberately made it so that it's Charlie Hunum stabbing the girlfriend in the shop yeah yeah they synced up with that but like they

even when they're watching it in the cinema they make it way more extreme they actually show nudity in blood well I think that's you know to kind of reflect that that's how it felt to those viewers at the time I get why but I don't like it

okay yeah I mean I don't think anyone is really like I don't think anyone's really saying it's good people are just sort of watching it out of a morbid curiosity Paul Schrader said it was good well okay did it? He did you Interesting.

I mean... So there? Well... Checkmate. I feel like an idiot, no. And didn't he get accused of something there? Being awesome. Yes, yeah, yeah.

Of directing light sleeper with David Spade. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, it was just... It was all bad. Charlie Hodrum. But like, you know, any time he's like doing a voice or whatever, it's never good. Like his...

Not to beat a dead horse, but like him in Greenstreet. with the terrible Cockney accent, you know? Yeah. Now, what about, we should have had a crossover, Gein Street. Think about that. Oh, that's very good. Mother, I'm the top boy in the firm. It's middle wall away.

They're trying to mug me off, mother. You know, it's funny, because they're all... Forever blowing bubbles. They're all going, yeah, it's fucking habit, yeah. Well, where are, he's like, they're fucking a dead body. Oh, Ed, what are you doing, brava? How we have to kick the fucking edge in?

I'm blowing bubbles. Didn't mean nothing by it, just being friendly as all. I didn't like, by the way, he's so good looking, alright? Yeah. Ed Gein didn't look like that.

And they have him like, you know, shirtless, he's like, you know, basically naked, all right. You know,

Ed Gein, though, wasn't a bad-looking fella. I'll let me just say that right now. Is he on your, what's that, you know,

like the cheat list? By a hall pass? Yeah, hall pass. Yeah, would that be a red flag if the guy your day is like,

hey, look, you want to fuck, you know Travis Kelsey who I want to fuck Ed Gein's

got a problem with that dig him up I will you know what's crazy I'll be a Geener Gooner a Beiner

no you know what is weird so it's this whole show was it eight episodes by Ed Gein yeah

they never included what's I think the most interesting thing is that I don't know when but at some stage

Werner Herzog got involved and he actually recorded stuff with Ed Gein did like interviews with him. Yeah, yeah. And at one stage, you're planning on digging up a body. Wow. And filming it, all right, to kind of get inside the mind of Ed Guillen. Oh.

Yeah. And then Vernon Herzog was like, fuck it. And narrate it. Like, yes. I am inserting myself and slowly, uh, fucking it with sad music playing as well. I didn't know that at all. Yeah, it wouldn't that be way more interesting. But then they take like insane liberty. like so that like the last episode they do that like mind hunter thing where like the mind hunter guys come in and interview them and from their interview it helps them catch ted bundy like all of that's made up like none of that happened it's like why would you also you know the bit where he goes to hell and meets charlie manson yeah that sounds like a joke that's yeah like i'm amazed they didn't have

a proper like lindmanuel miranda rap like it seems like that's something they would do. Yeah, yeah. That was like some 80s music. Yeah. He's just meeting all the different serial killers that he's inspired. Oh, and also, like, how, like, the bit where Norman Bates and Buffalo Bill and Leatherface all scared a kid.

Yeah. Who, like, it looked like an S&L sketch. Yeah. Could you make anything scary? Like, not instead, there's no, like, build up to anything. Yeah. If they just walk out, like, and it's like, hey, ooh, look, I'll change, though. Yeah.

And that's it, like, it does look like something they had a day to film, and they didn't know, like, blocking or anything. They didn't know storyboards. Very lazy. It feels like it was just like a mishmash of ideas, and they shot it. They got to the edit as like, well, this doesn't work, but we're not reshooting anything. so just tie it together and let's get the fuck out of here. Oh yeah,

it's coming back to me now. All the stuff like Anthony Perkins Yeah. It's just there's interesting stories and it's almost like you're wasting them by

like the stuff for him into conversion therapy and all that. Like I would like to see Anthony Perkins film at some stage. Like his story's very interesting. Yeah.

Like he was working with fucking Orson Wells and stuff. He was very well regarded and then at near the end he's doing like, you know, um, Psycho 4, I believe

while actively dying of AIDS. That's the only thing you can get workers. And his wife's like, why are you so sick all the time? Stop asking me questions. Look after a little goofball, son. All's good. The fuck I'm in a hell. I'm not feeling

all's good right now. Yeah. No, it was a bad show. Yeah. But what can you say? But it's one of those things, like, it's almost like there's so much being thrown at you it's hard to process it yeah so you're sort of inundated with like

and it was just like there seemed to be no rhyme or reason to the exactly yeah the jumping back and forth is just kind of like you know people say like oh when AI takes over everything will feel fake and weird everything feels like that now anyway because people don't care

it's all I didn't realize this either so I always heard that like with Netflix they have very strict rules about the color of everything and like how things are framed they also have their own cameras Netflix oh really yeah it's like these are the cameras you use

okay so that they want everything to look the same so it's basically like we're getting it's almost like we're aiming towards going AI essentially where it's like we have to make everything up the same every kind of like so it has the kind of fake look to it

yeah so that when you eventually do transition to a fully AI thing you wouldn't even be able to tell the difference. Exactly, yeah. Because they're pushing now, what's her name, Lily? Seeing her. Who's Lily? The AI actress.

Oh, yeah, Lily Norwood. Yeah, that's a, yeah, they're pushing her. Tilly Norwood or something like that. Sorry, sorry, Tilly. Fuck you, Brian, you asshole. I thought I was in my shot there. Yeah, yeah. So, like, they're pushing her, and like, there's obviously paid articles in, like, different newspapers.

I've been like, I have to say now, I think Lily's actually great. Mm-hmm. And she's the future of Hollywood. yeah and then all the actors are like this is wrong yeah

shut the fuck up it'd be pretty cool actually think of this okay when AI takes over Hollywood and then like you know

we're driving along it's like Ralph finds well you know we'll watch your car for money oh yeah they're all desperate

oh all the prostitutes you go to well you can make them look like fucking Tom Baker you know

just big a big scarf. Yeah, yeah. Wrap the scarfer out by cock. Oh, yeah. Oh, real quick, actually, yeah. That should remind you me there.

I'm still reading those Rotto Carol Kelly books. Oh, yeah. I'm loving him. They're very funny. Okay. And it's kind of like, I've embraced the world now,

and now I'm getting all the in-jokes and stuff and the running jokes. So I've drank the Kool-Aid now. And the guy, Paul Howard, is the writer. He's very good at keeping a joke going. Yeah. Where it's not funny at the third time.

but by the 50th time it's like I can't fucking deny this you know so like little things like he rode his wife's sister he doesn't know her name and they're running jokes he's always just like

oh what's her name or then someone interrupts oh like and it wouldn't be that funny though but he's been doing it now for like 20 bucks it's like I have to admire yeah just the commitment to the bit

yeah the commitment to the bit and like what I like is Ross the main character there's no catarsis there's no like lessen at all he's just a complete dick like one book starts off he's got

a half sister he just goes into start sniffing her underwear nice he just likes to sniff he wants to ride his half sister it's only half incestuous and he's got like a big bag of his like souvenirs and it's all the women he's rode he collects their underwear oh like trophies

yeah trophies and he sticks a little thing to it like paper clips it on a thing of like the name and the date Wow. Of all his conquests, you know? He's always cheating. Like, so at one stage there, his dad's T-shock now, all right, and they've sold everything to Russia because they've left the EU.

Yeah, yeah. So he's riding the guy, I think he's a Russian ambassador. He's riding his wife, all right? All right. But then Putin comes around and his dad, so he has to hide behind the couch, bollock naked for the whole night while his dad and Putin are like drinking. fucking Russian whiskey Russian vodka

and then it ends with like they agree to give a oh yeah they give them the book of Kells is a present oh nice yeah yeah

but then some girl from Finglis spills red wine all over it man they're so harsh and Fingless in the books yeah

yeah not harsh enough literally is like yeah people from Fingless after why get used to the smell and the thing you don't

that's the thing you never do yeah like it's obviously we're in I can smell fingles from here Jesus Christ

That's just me Yeah But you know It's funny Because I was like I read the first book The Miseducation of Rosso Carl Kelly

That was published In like 2000 And Fairfocus is a guy Paul Howard So he just self-published this All right And he had in the back of his car And he's drive around selling it

Wow Yeah to all his rugby friends And the first book Is very much like Kind of a Imagine an American cycle but it's a rugby college student no he's actually

he's doing a leave insert in the first book so it's like a student who's just riding everyone and drinking like Sean Bateman well yeah Patrick Bateman's younger brother oh right okay yeah

sorry I thought making a joke I didn't get alright yeah I've even read that book that's the sad thing all right yeah the shards mm-hmm yeah anyway so and it's just very like up front he's a complete dickhead

cheats on everyone all right and but because he plays rugby he can do anything he wants so he just he just literally he'll go in give the teacher abuse the teacher you know says heading back he gets the teacher fired okay because the principal's like

they're rugby boys yeah and the joke is that the principal's giving them this drink to make them play better and it makes them very aggressive okay so it's like stare you know yeah yeah yeah I don't know if you got that oh I got it thank you yeah yeah and just to follow this character from like leaving sir to he's in his 40s now

it's pretty fun but my point was the first book is kind of a little bit sinister in a way because it's not as goofy and it's just a guy being a dickhead and you're like is he gonna rape someone oh yeah and like he's just like he's a bit where they all play soggy biscuit and he's bragging about how he won it you know

and it's like let's go take a weird turn you know and I read a review about the series and there's a guy talking about very kind of like you know guardian stuff of like, you know, it's a grotesquery of the upper classes, but it reflects her fear and, you know, late stage capitalism and all that. I was like,

who wrote this review? And it was the guy who wrote the Kevin movie. We need to talk about Kevin. Oh. So we need to talk about Kevin's kind of like a reaction to the Russell Carl Kelly books. Oh, wow. Yeah.

It is basically, but the thing is like, it's literally, that character, that is Russell Carol Kelly. Yeah. But if you just grew up to be an asshole the whole time Yeah, it's kind of interesting I do like these books now

I probably If I read all 21 or 22 I might get a little bit bored of them Yeah, how many have you read? So I have read Braywatch Grand Camino Normal Sheeple

And The Miseducation of Russell Carl Kelly I feel there's another one as well They all kind of blend together yeah yeah um what's you don't know what i oh what's the other one tell you i i'll be i will be honest okay in bray watch he helps he he he becomes a rugby coach for these kids in bray okay secretary school kids right and he thinks bray is like a bunch of inbred cunts you know right but he's like you know they're smelly disgusting people uh but he gets this rag tag team to the to the finals and it looks

we're going to lose but at the end the kid who was a real fuck up he gets the final kick and he wins the game and they're all celebrating and I was like yes yeah I got really invested in it yeah felt like you won

yeah in a way yeah yeah yeah so I'm enjoying those books as well I have a book about Sinn Féin and I haven't read you why give you a time no okay sorry yeah I tell you what I read the first few pages

though right kind of introduction A book about Sinn Féin? The history of Sinn Féin. Why would you read that? What? Why not? Why would you read that, though? What are you reading?

I'm reading History of the Silk Road, actually. That's all. It's pretty interesting. I'm not very good debate, I'm like. It's all, yeah, Ross, Allbrock and, like, the FBI trying to take him down.

But it's just very, you know the early days of you can enjoy that okay i'll i'll stick to my mary lu macdonald thank you very all right uh actually doesn't sound good is it physical book no it's the audio book oh all right can't really share that put burn on cd no how long is it uh it's like 12 hours yeah 12 cd you should do it yeah yeah come on no i'll just send you voice notes of a minute a minute each yeah just be reading it out your memory of it yeah yeah yeah showy selling fucking ash, right, pills, fucking a bit of

shang up the snout, right, up the fucking apples and pears. Yeah. Lara, you know, Cockney-Ryman slang, I don't care for Cockney-Ryman slang. It kind of irritates me. Really? Yeah, it's like if somebody put a schizophrenic

and a thesaurus in a blender and swirled it around and then poured it into a dyslexic asshole, that's what comes out. I don't like it. Well, you know the reason for it? No. It was to be confusing.

It was to stop the pealers from understanding you. Mm-hmm. The cops. Well, I don't find it very appealing at all, Brian. I know what's interesting, because some people's brains are wired differently. So, I knew a guy who was very classically intelligent. You know, I'm intelligent, but in like a Doctor Who trivia kind of way, but he was intelligent the way, like, you know, he understood words and, like, you know,

like, you know, he knew how many planets there were. Yeah. You know, all that kind of stuff, you know. But he, I was talking to him about Cockney Rhyman slang, and he was finding it really, almost like, like, nails on a chalkboard, you're right? He was just like, what, but why would you say, what? Yeah. Apples and pears.

And he was, like, overtinking it was like, so is it like, um. Try and actually make sense of why you would. He literally was like, some do the letters or, like, number of letters in it as well. Is that correspond to any? No, literally it's like, it sounds like stairs. He's like, that can't be it. There must be some of the... It can't be that stupid.

And for me, it makes perfect sense. Yeah. I wish all the words were just like that. Honey and bees and honey. Yeah, you go over to the shop with just bees and honey in your pocket. Here you go, Miss. You take it to a literal.

Yeah. I'm... We're over an hour. Anyway, there. Oh, it was a fun one now. Yeah. what will I watch next week I got a wedding next week

gotta go to oh yeah yeah so we'll record the weddings on Friday what's your schedule next week yeah I could do what Thursday let's do a Friday

let's get you down oh yeah anyone got any objections yes be quiet for an hour yeah cocky rhymed slag load of shite

is it? Yeah is it like a traditional wedding or is it one of those hippy-dippy Muslim weddings you know

one of those bend it like beckham wedding humanist ceremonies you know i actually don't know is it like in a catholic church with a priest i assume so okay no funny business because they're becoming less and less common like the last three or four weddings i've been to

have all been like not in a church you know where's a fucking shipper it's in just where they have the reception it's like in the hotel and it's just like a a humanist ceremony when they call it dead going to yeah i know

make a fucking fucking effort, yeah. What, do you have a priest there? No, it's some fucking civil servant. Pretty much, yeah. Just some book clerk, you know. Yeah. Do they make, like, somebody from like the DMV, you know.

Yes, you know, one of those people who works in DMV. Well, no, I'm just trying to think now. So it's, let's say, some boring, like, you know, librarian or whatever, I guess. Do they do like a now forever, you may now kiss the bride? at all They do Yeah, it is like There's like

All right It's like Subsection 9 3, 4, 7 says that you're now married Yeah Do not kiss No, it's like

Do you consent to kiss this woman Yeah Or else it is rape It's Sometimes even if she does consent She might change your mind Afterwards So just be sure

To do that to ruin your career No, it's like I just ask Patty Jackson We have Well, okay Wow You're really drinking the rugby Kooliate there.

Yeah, yeah. Well, his dad successfully won a libel case there. His dad did? Yeah, yeah. Okay. So there. Right. I always think it's so funny.

Like, like, someone, someone said that he helped his son or something. Oh, right. Okay. No, I think he, like, I think he, I don't know. I didn't read the article. Right. But I always think about Patty Jackson is so funny. I used to work for Go Power.

I think he said before. And they did a deal with Patty Jackson. After? No, right before. Oh, right. And they had all these teeth. t-shirts like Patty Jackson

supports Gold Power and consent but he was winking in the picture he had his fingers crossed we didn't think of anything at the time

we just thought it normal you know but I remember literally the guy the manager of Gold Power was like it's a shame he should have taught

that before he did it you know he made us suck like right mugs didn't it yeah then he said we're worse off

than her you know we really had us over a barrel you know Anyway, you were going to say something I interrupted you Oh, just, yeah, those ceremonies It is like a

Now we have the ring that represents You know, the eternity There is no beginning There is no it You know, blah, blah They do a whole spiel They have a fucking Richard Dawkins book Yeah

They do like a voodoo dance You know Yeah And we'll end it there I am conscious of time All right We're taking up the living room you know.

Yeah, yeah. So next week I will I don't know. You'll figure it out. Yeah. I'll watch House of Guinness. How about that?

Jesus, don't do that. What else I'm going to do? What? Go out there and meet people. No. Pull the other one, mate. Yeah, fair enough. All right.