Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Episode 90 : Tory Lanez Shoots Megan Thee Stallion

Episode Date: October 18, 2020

Brian and James stopping the media from keeping the black man down. With special guest Matthew Tallon.

Yes. And we're starting. We have Matthew back again. Yes. It's the first time you've ever had someone three times in a row. Four? Is this our fourth? You're right?

Four, yeah. Well, listen back to the first one. We'll see. That might be the last episode. First one, look, I'll be honest. I got a little anti-Semitic. Justifiably, I would say. Yeah, yeah.

I started punching holes in the wall and going and goes, Barbara, what's her, what's their name? Barbara. Streisand. Streisand. I never said Barbara Weinstein I was like no I'm mixing it up That's happened again I just thought of Barbara Bush

I was like that's not right For lots of reasons Going mental I'm Barbara Bush Like I'm Eminem I'm sorry Miss Cheney Your husband's hot problems Complicated

So Mathew's back again Yes yes You've had been on a lot of episodes It's good to Matthew here Because kind of like You know when a couple aren't happy They have a kid Yeah

just to like you know it's like maybe this will save it yeah and then that doesn't work so they have like they get into swinging and i'm just swinging with the kids we just go to all their podcasts and we put our car keys in a bowl but they don't know what we're doing it's funny if like those like parents that are swinging but they don't really know how it works so like they uh they pick up the key and like i guess i'm taking your kid yeah swingers like they just go they take the keys like i guess this is my car now just drive home ah you idiot the perfect cry I bring my girlfriend to a swingers party take the key, drive off, she gets fucked

Yeah, what a loser I win I'm driving a fucking Bentley, she's getting rammed by Four guys I wish it's a Bentley, no, it's like a shitty golf No, you think it's a Bentley though Yeah, I don't know much of a car It's a bike

I like the color Yeah, swing it is such a weird thing But like, I don't know The kind of old-timey style of swinging Yeah, probably the kink that makes most academic sense to me though because it's just like you've been married for 20 years you're fucking sick of your wife yeah

you like you literally feel nothing for her anymore and she feels the same about you's like you have all these taxes together yeah yeah yeah like a condo in vermont so you can't get a divorce yeah it's like maybe if I bang one other woman that isn't attractive yeah because the swingers people

they're not attractive it's all people the same it's all sad people like yeah it's all people from like your neighbor from the neighborhood watch it's all people yeah they look They all look exactly like your spouse. Yeah. This neighborhood, so you're going to a swinger's thing, but just one guy with still a gun.

Yeah. Looking for anyone wearing a hoodie. You know, it would be great, though. Like, okay, so you got like six couples, but maybe one of your friends, like, remarried, and his new wife's really hot, and all the husbands are just, like, died together.

And, like, the other five women are just sitting on the sofa in their underwear, just like, come on, guys. Yeah. Yeah, they're like, we're all going to, like, take her at one. the girls you can go knit yeah it's just like the scene in buggy nights where they're just having sex on the ground and everyone's in a circle around oh that's great yeah yeah boogie nights is great

the cook and buggy nights is one of the best characters in the movie ever yeah yeah some people watch him are like yeah fucking finally he went his own way finally yeah yeah they just kneel drop fleetwood Mac. You can know you're aware. Yeah, this is why James' place is so cool, because I just show up sometimes and we're watching Boogie Nights. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And Boogie Nights is a film that if you walk in, you have to watch till the end. Yes, yeah, we were, one of the days we were recording, we went down, they were watching Boogie Nights, and I was like, yes, happy days. And they're actually watching the faculty right now. Do you ever see that? No, no.

It's real, like, 90s-tastic. It's basically like a B movie, horror movie, like kind of schlocky and silly, but set in the 90s high school but it kind of has like body invasion of the body snatchers as like a big reference in it or whatever so it's basically like aliens take over this 90s high school

and this band of misfit kids have to like you know save the day and it's a lot of fun directed by Mexican yes yeah well directed by Robert Rodriguez but written by Kevin Williamson who wrote Scream and is he Mexican? I don't think so I'm not watching that fuck that Yeah.

Screw that guy. If it ain't Latin, I don't give a fuck. He really defined a lot of my childhood because I loved, like, scream, the faculty and Dawson's Creek. So his voice is just, like, I just thought every teenager was incredibly articulate. Because that's one of his big tropes is like these, like, 16-year-olds would have big, like, articulate conversations, lots of big words. They're talking about philosophy. And I, like, oh, I turned 13 in a few years. I better knuckle down and crack on the books.

I had that when I was 15. I was like, why don't I talk like the kids on Buffy? And kill vampires and stuff. Where's Giles? I'm such a nerd. You just go up to the local librarian. Are we going to get them tonight?

You've got like a wooden steak. A wooden steak is a desaurus. You pull out a random word and like impress people. Oh, lackadaisical. Onomatopoeia? Please leave. Oh my God, how Whedon-esque his dialogue is. Oh, he's, I've been hearing some bad things about Wheaton.

Apparently, he's a bit of a, I don't know, a bit of an Ellen, bit of a male Ellen DeGeneres. Explain yourself. Yeah, you say a bad word about weed in this house. Hey, man, I love Wheaton. I love Wheaton. Is this about cheating on his wife or Ray Fisher? Ray Fisher.

Yeah, Ray Fisher's a little, I'd beat him up. I don't want to give that guy fucking screen time. He doesn't deserve to be, yeah, he doesn't deserve the clout to this podcast. Yeah, he's a clout chasing bitch. We're deep platforming Yeah, I'm deep platform You know what We talk about a lot of people

In this show Yeah And I don't mind Okay, we talk with David Duke I don't mind Okay Everyone's entitled to their opinions You know, it's so funny

I was like we talked with David Duke I couldn't think of anyone else We talked about Kevin Smith Whitestein That was downstairs Bill Cosby I don't talk about a lot of people

Okay And I don't mind I say we're promoting them Yeah Let Bygrons be bygons Ray Fisher I might bleep his name out Yeah

Because that's how much You know why I don't like him? Yeah. Because not only did he disrespect Josh Whedon, okay, is it, it's Joss. Joss. Yeah, that's the reason why you shouldn't like him, okay? Yeah, because he's a pretentious name. My name is Joss.

Joss. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He also disrespected Jeff Johns, who's a comic book writer I like. Oh, okay. Oh, what did Jeff John? Did he do, like, one of those Batman, the really famous hush? No, that was Jeff Lope. Oh, I get mixed up.

No, actually, I think you'll find, Matt Beard. dick in you there he's like leaning back like ah get with the pro I'm joking I'm joking okay yeah no he did a lot

he's done a lot very interesting comic work over the years but that's why I'm like Ray Fisher is dead to me and if he tries he got in the show

yeah I'm locking the door yeah my door doesn't even a lot he's an actor he was in he's cyborg

he was in the Marvel movies and apparently no was it not it was in DC movie oh DC movie oh I'm really

coming out of oh my god look at O'T he's just like he's just like he's cock of the walk right now

isn't he The cat that got the cream To be honest with you okay See I know a lot about comic books So I can be like you're wrong Yeah yeah yeah But that doesn't help me No

No it's not a useful Right now see this situation Is the only time Your extensive knowledge of comic books Sees you come out on top So that's why I'm trying to ease into sports now Right okay I'm trying to get into the primary league

At the moment Oh Okay Yeah good luck with that So I think that will impress people That will impress the lads back home Yeah So I have this kind of weird dream

say I'm in London one time okay and these guys pull out a gun and put it in my mouth all right and they're about to kill me and I see like their Manchester United Jersey

like that's a football team he sploaks all right yeah join the gang and then you're going right doing diamond house yeah because you knew

Manchester United was it's like this is England yeah God English football is so shit yeah it really is it's so boring the Premineship League

there's just nothing about it there's no personality in it. There's nothing to invest. No jumping around, no dunks. No don't. I'm like, where's Shaq? It's just Saudi billionaires playing Conquers, basically. Oh, yeah, yeah.

There's so much bad money in it. I think, um, what's it? Abramovich, the head of Chelsea. You ever see what he does in Israel? No. I mean, he funds a group and their whole thing is like to just kick Palestinians out of their houses. Yeah, yeah. Jesus Christ.

And he's not even Palestinian. I mean, Israeli. He just, he's like, that's good crack. I'm a fan. Benta. Banta. I've been listening to a guy called True Jordy Oh yeah, the True Jordy podcast

Those guys are actually kind of entertaining They talk about football but they're entertaining Talk about other stuff as well But they've got a huge fan base Like people pay them like 17 pounds To ask like what type of cereal do you like That's crazy man They pay money

I've heard like big American comedians mention true Jordy Like well I'd Once I consider big like Tim Dillon you know, Tim Dillon? Yeah, yeah, he's like talked about the true Geordie podcast and said like he would like to be a guest on it.

It is funny sometimes you hear them talking about things that aren't sport. Yeah. And you kind of realize that they're not like, they don't really have the vocabulary to talk about other things. So like, he was talking about Cobra Kai.

Okay. But he didn't really have the vocabulary. He didn't know the word reboot. So he's going like, yeah, it's great because it's like, it's like, it's like the karate kid, okay? But no. But it's like, it's, it's, same but they're all older but it's the same thing all right but they don't have a time machine

that's what's mental about it is like present day but that happened back then didn't it the time just passed regular like it's like in real time brilliant it was so funny hearing him tried to explain what a reboot yeah yeah and people are like paying 17 quid what you want about what that makes sense his bloody slags yeah that was australia in there. You bloody slays. Oh, I'm from Birmingham, you bloody tart. What a great scoop, though, be turning out

True Jordy's from, like, Brisbane. All right, you got me. The kids out of the big. The rush. I'll hide my hands up. You fucking Manta, mate. That's all I listen to at the moment. It's like True Jordy and Adam 22.

That's all I listen to it. And you're probably sick of me talking about Adam 22. No, no. I actually, I was playing a cool in the only fans conversation. I do not know who. the only thing I know about Adam 22 is that he fucked somebody in a bunny suit.

Yeah, that's all you need to know. The only way I know about Adam 22 is through Brian but he's like really big now like, yeah, he's really big like, he's dating Lana the plug who's like really big on only fans. Yeah, yeah.

So that's all and like Why do I call her Lana the plug? No, he's simple, simple. Hey, let me tell you show if you need to ask, you ain't ready for it. All right? Let me tell you that. Oh, hey.

He sent your mama's podcast. Is it right? Yeah. so yeah so i listen to him be honest with yeah i kind of listen to it more as like i go like oh i'm listening to it ironically but after a while it's like i've listened to like 12 hours of this and now it's over and i'm crying yeah yeah yeah and it's like they are kind they're all dumb so i kind of feel superior but that's not what you should be listening to her like so they had like yeah adam 22 like uh he had those he is a network what's his network called no jumper

no jumper and they had a podcast on it called the tots next door and like there are these two very, a lot of makeup, a lot of plastic surgery and, like, you know, they're very, just like Insta-Huns, I guess is the term. But, like, one of their claim to fame was what, she sucked off, like, seven players from the Phoenix Suns. Yeah.

In one sitting. Wow. Again, that's why UK Sports is boring. Yeah, yeah, because there's not, because, like, those stories all get swept under the... Yeah. But UK Sports is all just like, yeah, he banged a slag. Yeah. Well, there's definitely a lot of, like, you know, dodgy shit that gets pushed

under the radar with the, you know, British football. Well, British football as well it's much smaller so you can't just ring up the heads of the sun and be like, don't talk about the rape. Yeah, pretty much. They're like, say no more.

So there are a bit of how's your father and ananky-panky going on in a hotel room? Don't say no outs about it, all right. Do you need to plug that in? Yeah, I was trying to plug in here. I did. I was trying to do it like using podcast tricks. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is why people I listen to the podcast. They hear the real shit. The real shit. We don't censor. This is real life. Someone's going to pay 17 pounds, but can we hear Matthew plug in his charger again? Yeah. Matthew the plug.

That's what I was thinking. That's what she made me think of. Oh, bloody hell, I need to charge my phone. Yeah, that's why they call her that. Lana, the plug, always is a phone charger. In her asshole. Yeah, yeah. But the thing is that it charges up the phone.

That's the amazing part. my god it's like you know when you you see in american shows he's a potato yeah yeah yeah the power o'clock or like nikolai tesla who he could like you know a bunch of light bulbs like you know without any like wires that's what it was there were people in the ground

yeah and then it's like the Nikola Tesla of our generation and then Henry Ford killed her yeah and he made Hugh Jackman a cloning machine Adam 22 it's he's a bit dodgy though he's got a few skeletons in the Look, we all do, like...

That's about morphing Ray Fisher propaganda. Ah, no, this is... I don't think this is... Slandering the good names of... Yeah, Ray Fisher tells me everything. You're teaming up the Illuminati destroy black men.

Even though Adam Twenty-two isn't black, but... And Ray Fisher is black. Yeah, he is, yeah, yeah. Actually, speaking of destroying black men... Yes. As I open up my notebook. I got the notes.

He got the notes. I want to talk about something here that I've been very interested in recently. Torrey Lanes. oh yeah yeah yes this is very interesting this is so interesting you shoot a woman in the foot

twice in the feats the feet both feet and then you're writing album about it saying like that bitch lying yeah yeah

yeah it is pretty remarkable I'm gonna I should probably tell the full story yeah so yeah give the full story then so Torrey Lanes yeah okay picture this

um oh I'm picturing it picture this a black man I just started laughing we don't have those okay picture this

okay it's Canada all right okay 1990 okay a baby is born

a baby is born a nurse is like you've a baby okay all right they hold up the baby okay

it's Torrey lanes people say he's going to be next Drake okay he's Canadian he can rap what more do you want

was he in what's the grassy was it the no what's that bad like

fucking soap opera that Drake was in Yeah, DeGrassey. Oh, that's what it is. The Grassy next generation. You ever watch that? No, I haven't. Don't know.

Sorry, man. You guys. So, Degrassie, Drake's in a wheelchair in that. Really? Did they show why? Do you know, did they show why he's in a wheelchair? No, I've never seen him. I think it was a school shooting.

Ah, okay. So for some reason, Drake's in a wheelchair in that show why I saw okay. Right. And they're like, you're worthless. Yeah, a piece of shit. Can't walk. Can't do nothing? All right.

And then. Good Canadian accent. Yeah. Yeah, there's no attempt. There's the guy from Joey. You can't do nothing, can you, you a lady piece of shit, a boot? So they're all like, yeah,

fucking piece of shit, okay? But then it's a talent show, and then Drake wheels up onto the stage. Okay. What's he going to do, walk? He does the Napoleon Dynamite dance? No, he raps. Okay.

Yeah, he's like, say I'm in a wheelchair, say I'm in a wheelchair, fuck you. Saddam from the bottom now we're here. Yeah. And then they all go like, yeah, people in wheelchair

aren't evil A boot You shouldn't have been left in the forest that bird Yeah So anyway So Tori Lanes

Okay Yeah He becomes big Online He's rapping Right Very good rap albums Okay

Did he get big In like SoundCloud or something Or what No I think the regular way Really He was legit Mainstream big

Okay People were saying Like he could be The next Drake And him and Drake A bit of few Because he'd always be like Yeah

I'm coming for the crown Oh yeah I'm hot on your heels or whatever. And then, you know, Drake he'd be like all these little rap bitches. Trying to swing at, trying to take a pop

at the chap. Yeah, yeah. Swing at the king. Yeah, okay. It ain't happening. Tori Lane's, he was coming up there, okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He was on the ride. So he starts banging Megan and Stallion. Woo. I don't know if they were in love. Which means it was wrong. If they weren't in love, it was wrong. They didn't go into detail in the article I read.

I don't know if he bought her flowers. Were they holding hands When you see people holding hands now It does feel like, you know It's just in 1950s Yeah Well, it is kind of It's racy now, you know

In the area of COVID to hold hands It's like, oh, it's like a It's like BDSM almost It's like anal It's like a terrorist act Yeah Yeah Sexy terrorism

Dirty I haven't washed my hands Okay So he's banging a Megan Nostalian Okay Yeah And she's on like his Instagram Live videos a lot

you know, and then he's also pretty friendly with Kylie Jenner. Oh, is that right? Which one's Kylie? Is it Kylie or Caitlin? Kylie's the youngest. Okay, yeah. The hot one. Yeah, well, they're all pretty hot. Actually, they all are.

Yeah. Every one of them. Yeah, all right. Hello, girls. Surprise. Sorry. They're all good. They're all good people. They've all never done anything wrong in their lives.

Okay, right. so they go to a house party okay and apparently at the house party Torrey Lanes has been a little bit too friendly with Kylie Jenner Oh I see

Okay Now apparently isn't my sources Yeah Okay And by my sources I mean Adam 22's podcast Okay Okay

Which is him going like This is what I heard From my friends Okay So it's like Purple Monkey dishwasher It's basically like You're friends

And his friends are the same Yeah it's like You like your friends With Adam 22 It's like I'm inside Land on the Plug Yeah, yeah, that's right.

Okay, so apparently she starts giving a bit of grief, okay? Like, you know, you're paying too much attention to her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, now let's see who's the side you're on, okay? Okay. So, um, they drive home after the party. Yes. And, uh, Megan, the stallion's still giving them grief, okay? Oh, giving it all that.

Okay, ma'am, ma'am, ma'am. Now, next thing we know, so we don't know what happened in the, in the car, okay? Okay. Next time we know, they're stopped by the police because, uh, maybe something happened in the car. Okay. Again, this is all, like, we don't know what happened, okay? Sure. Okay.

Tori Lane's to find him with a gun Unregistered gun Okay That's bad Yeah it's like not paying your TV license Yeah exactly But it's a gun Okay

And Megan the stallion walks out of the car This is all a video And she's bleeding from the feet Whoa But she's walking Okay But she has to sit down pretty quickly Right okay

Maybe the adrenaline Yeah I would say Getting shot in the foot I didn't actually know I didn't know what happened in the car Yeah No one knows what happened inside the car Okay

but basically she gets out of the car with two holes in her feet that are bleeding. Yeah, kind of like there was a gun. Like Jesus on the cross, she's bleeding, okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And they have Tory lanes down the ground and at first she says, oh, it was just broken glass. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. But her,

after she said like, yeah, of course said that, because they want the police to shoot him. Which is, yeah. No, I think that's very legitimate. They probably, like a black man with a gun in LA. And the fact that he already fired on her. Like, yeah. Because those cops were a big fan. of like megan a stallion exactly yeah yeah that's the thing they just loved wop so much yeah

how dare you do chase a queen had that come out no no yeah no yeah what was her biggest track had she had the she had a lot of big track uh hot girl summer okay okay yeah yeah yeah yeah so she was a big she's on the rise like yeah she's a billboard musician okay yeah yeah um so he he shot her the i think yeah it's pretty much you know yeah so she says afterwards yeah he we're having the argument and he shot me in both feet that's crazy man yeah okay And, okay, so A woman accuser you something Yeah

Shooting her in a foot twice Yeah Okay, how would you respond Have I done it or not? You have Okay Now TMZ have texts of him The next day saying like hey, sorry about that

Already fucked up, I still love you Okay Okay But apart from that there was no response When you said how would you respond Am I Tory or am I Megan in this situation? You're James Cadden Okay

Okay Oh, I'm so low You're James Cadden You flew to America Yeah I made it big You're banging About my wet ass pussy

Okay no let's just Okay let's say this Okay Me and you The podcast gets big Yeah We accidentally shoot No you do

I didn't involve You accidentally shoot Matthew in the foot Okay Okay Yeah And Matthew's rightly pissed Yeah

I'm very pissed off Okay You're on Instagram live Or like This guy's a fucking bitch Or right Fuck him How would you respond

Time of the month You know what they're like Don't you Yeah, she's bleeding, yeah. Yeah, bleeding, yeah, yeah. That happens every month to bleed from their feet. They bleed from their feet. Yeah.

I mean, yeah, like, now, did the police pursue it at all? Because I would assume... It's an ongoing investigation. He doesn't want to incriminate himself too much by saying, yeah, I did this, blah, blah, blah. But TMZ have texts in the text? Does he just say, I'm sorry? No, he doesn't say that case sorry for shooting you in the feats. In the feats.

Hey, I don't know if you understood that last text. When I said I'm sorry, I'm talking about when I shot you in the foot Remember? No one I was flirting with Kylie.

You had a lot to drink last night maybe you don't remember but I shot you in both feet. Well, he does okay media blackout for two months

Okay. This happened two months ago. Right, right, right. So he just went dark. Yeah, went dark, yeah. And then the day of

when you and they announced that they wouldn't prosecute the cops for the Brianna Taylor murder. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. That same day he was like, time to release the album.

What album? So he released an album called Daystar. Okay. Which is his birth name, isn't it? I actually don't know about that. Yeah, that's his birth name. His name's day star. I know, that's the thing,

because his rap name is just a regular name. Yeah, Daystar is, that's a great name. Daystar. Wait, so he's like, no, my name's Tori. I'm going to be Tori. I'm a big fan of the conservatives in the UK. Maggie Thatcher is my big influence. I thought Brexit was a great idea.

Yeah, Daystar is a great rap name. that's you know what fucking throw the book you know what now on Megan's side he turned down an opportunity like that

yeah but anyway he released an album called Daystar now he says it's because his mother is his mother's birthday yes

so what a better birthday presents you know yeah but so it's an album denying that you shot your girlfriend it's an entire

album dedicated to to denying that he shot this black bitch in his words yeah and in their stuff

like you know not only use his heel like it's not like hey look he could have gone like this girl's lying yeah okay no yeah this is a plot by the illuminati no and charlamine the god are you serious yeah he goes that way yeah charlemagne's working with the white man that's amazing yeah that is amazing i am team day star all the way okay so this what happened is okay i i've become tory lanes now to explain myself okay please what happened is okay yeah i got my masters from the record company okay okay And I was going to go independent.

Okay. But the music industry were afraid. Because you blow up too big? Yeah, I get too popular, okay? Right, okay. So the music industry who work with the Illuminati, okay? Okay. He actually has used the term Aluminati.

Yes. Wow. Yes. Okay. I love it. In the lyrics multiple times. Oh, yeah. I only listen to the first track, which is just like, I didn't shoot that girl.

How did it miss her tendons? Yeah, yeah. Explain that. Well, shock you from the back. How did you know who did it? Jet fuel doesn't melt. steel beams well we're

building he's just making points he's like I shot you in the foot while we're building seven

from the street didn't should you win the feet yeah okay yeah so it's just an entire

album people have called gaslighting the album yes gaslighting the album yeah that's brilliant

oh man this is great I didn't know about any of yeah it's so funny how like he's like no this is like

a global conspiracy it's so much the only only went out of it's Charlie had the God. If there's one thing that we have learned about cases like this,

it's that like for men usually get away with it if they just to deny it, which is a horrible thing. But you don't need to bring the Illuminati into it. Yeah, the Illuminati are just like, well, we were going to let it fly, but you just fucked up. Yeah, yeah, you just ruffled the feathers. To Luminati, you're like, okay, we got all like, you know, like calls a coup in Venezuela and, you know, take down the government.

And there's that Nazi moon base on the moon. We really got to get back up there because those guys. Oh no A black rapper might get successful This has never happened before We need to get Clinton after this guy Hillary herself takes a job

Hillary shoots Megan in the feet I have to talk to the blink 182 boy first But then I'll do the day star man Yeah it's so funny Listen to the album And best bit The comments, okay I don't know if it's an algorithm

or just his fans so dedicated or maybe it's like the most popular But all the fans are like You will not see a single comment That's like He's a bad man Or Megan the Stallion is telling the truth That's interesting

Because everything on Twitter There's like a movement To boycott the album That's like if you're listening To the album You're complicit in the silence That's why it must be an algorithm thing Complicit Brian, you've listened to it

I have And I quite enjoy it I'm definitely going to listen to it By the way Because it sounds amazing Yeah, yeah. Where did he release it just on YouTube? Online.

Online, okay. He did, like, a full proper album release. It's on Spotify and everything. Oh, okay, right, right, right. Interesting that, like, they would allow that, but, uh, whatever. I'm sure what's the Spotify care. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, like, maybe they could pay their artists an extra cent per million streams before they care about that.

Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah. Listen to the album. It's so, and, like, it's, like, nonstop, like, these kind of, like, things. But also, he says that, like, because it's an ongoing court case, he can't talk about it. All right. So, like, it goes. was back and forth like she's a lying bitch

I didn't shoot her I can't talk about the case but she's also a lying bitch I didn't shoot her releasing an album being like I can't address these allegations Hey where was the gunshots in the car okay I can't talk about the case How'd she walk out of the car Why was it not there should have been more blood

I can't talk about the case Oh man this is wild No really I gotta look into this It's great it's so cool though It's such a cool thing to do to just like Because it's probably the most compelling thing you could possibly do is release an album.

You're guaranteed that people are on such a perfect time because she just did Wap with fucking Cardi B her like she is you know she's the biggest most famous she's ever been and now this thing happens he releases an album about it like it's

bound to be blowing up and Kanye West is making the whole thing of artists getting their masters back really huge so it's like the perfect it lines up really well here's the thing though okay yeah so I've been reading all these comments it must be an algorithm thing because it's all positive comments

about Tory No, just sounds like the customer is always right and they know good music Now Dave raised some very interesting points Oh who's they The YouTube comment Russia bought 47765

Yeah the Russians are doing this as well Two guys We said Megan the Steyn Getting jizzy with it 49 says this I made a post that says Megan the stallion has AIDS I win

Star will become number one album We have defeated Illuminati So here's the thing, okay Yeah Megan says she shot him in the backseat But he got out of a car in front seat Wait, so she says that he was in the backseat They were both in the back seat

Oh, somebody else was driving Yeah, they don't drive themselves, they're famous Okay, sorry And they were coming from a party, they were probably loaded Yeah, that's a good point actually, yeah, yeah how do you defend that some reason I was thinking he was driving while going hey hold still there

that's what I was picturing too yeah yeah like Dick they're like I can't afford an Uber Okay so wow that's crazy So what how do you explain that Okay so He got out in the front seat Yeah he maybe climbed into the front seat Okay

Well okay another point All right Does one of a Megan Estalian's friends Yeah Unfollowed her on Instagram Okay. Whoa. I have never heard of somebody doing that before.

Yeah, yeah. Unfollowing somebody on Instagram? A girl unfollowing her friend who just got successful. Hmm. Yeah, that doesn't happen. But they say nice things about each other in public. Yeah, yeah. So, I don't know.

Well, about another point, okay? This is a good point. Yeah. What about the fact that Megan Estalian is a snitch? in what context Oh, okay, right No, well, she covered for him initially Yeah, then she would

Backtratched, okay She covered for him when he's holding a gun Yeah, yeah, yeah Well, what, did she then go and file a police report And all that It must have because it's currently Being investigated I mean, come on, like you got fucking a bullet in each foot

you'd be a little peeved. No, I think that's impenetrable logic. She's like fucking Adriana from the surprise. Yeah. Someone needs the driver into the woods.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm just saying like, I was about to say something like, as Torrey Lanes, but I was like, yeah, I could be taking out context. No, let's do it. Come on, don't be a pussy.

I'm just saying like, we'll think you're a loser if you don't say. Yeah, yeah. We'll pour a whole bottle of Bailey's down your throat if you don't say it. Good. Then I could drive home and have fun.

No, it's just a little. Drive home and shoot my girlfriend I had to come into her But in character, okay I would have used more colorful language Sure, yeah I get you

That would have been nice Well I chickened out Because I'm a finuck You're a pussy Yeah, okay Okay, no look I think you'd be like Well fuck this guy

You shot me in both feet Yeah You know she might have also been pressured by people around her To like you've got to make a statement You can't let him get away with it Imagine how much of a simp

you'd be to cover up somebody shooting you in the foot Yeah be like the nerd kid who the bully is like beating the shit out of and then the teacher comes along. And it's sort of obviously it's, you know, it's an extreme case of domestic violence and like, you know, that's the biggest problem is like when women feel like they can't come forward about domestic violence. So maybe she felt like an actual obligation as a woman in the media as like she. And kind of an icon. Because people properly like look up to her like base their personalities on her now.

Yeah, exactly. So she kind of, maybe she felt. a kind of moral or civic responsibility and probably encourage other people to be like why you also got shot in the foot yeah it starts an association women who are shot on the foot you know what's interesting actually

because then Cardi B like didn't she go on a big rant against Takeshi 6-9 for being a snitch saying like you know he should get what's coming to him all that shit no you could argue those are different but I don't have the time or the energy to argue

that okay who did Takeshi 69 snitch on everybody what's it called the nine lanes Yeah, are the nine trays. Yeah, yeah, nine trays. They're like a gang. Are they, like, affiliated with the bloods or something? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, like, he was, like, deep in that whole kind of, like, gang life on the streets or whatever. And then he got arrested for, I think it was racketeering. And he was looking at, you know, proper, like, it was a federal case. He was looking at serious time. So in order to get, basically, slip the noose, he had to rat on a bunch of people. And then, like, but that's the thing, he came out afterwards, got out of jail and released an album called snitching or something like that. Telltale.

Telltale. Basically like, yeah, I snitched and I don't give a fuck and he kind of like tried to own it if you know what I mean, but I think he has lost a lot of credibility because of that, you know? The thing is, who the fuck needs credibility when you're a millionaire now? You have like, you have all of your

Hollywood agent friends. But also like, so like yeah, obviously I think it was called tettletail or tattletail, something like that. So obviously like, if you're in a gang and someone snitches on you, you can be peeved, all right? but all these white people that live in Carlo are like

you shouldn't be a snitch okay I heal me yeah he was raised on the streets don't be snitching hey I morally object to listening to Takesy 69 because he's a snitch

Yeah yeah Not that he's a paedophile or anything But well yeah he did Wasn't he like getting sucked up By a 13 year old on Instagram In his music video Snapchat No there was actually like a video

Of him and his mate Double Team and a 13 year old Yeah I think that was going to be music video. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. He was like, this would be great.

Put this to music. Drake did that as well, didn't he? Don't want to be a snitch. No, no, no, no. Don't take down another powerful black man. Wait,

what did what? I thought that Drake did that as well. No, Drake message, 11. I know that he was... Oh, Millie Bobby Brown. Yeah, but it was like a kind of harm just like,

if you want to get naked, I can get naked in the same... I'm lying, I'm lying. I'm lying. Yeah, it was just like, hey, being famous can be crazy. You want to hang it, chill out sometime.

Yeah, but the number... That's just the start of it, the grooming. I do like the idea of like, hey, Millie By Brown, being famous can be hard. You got a lot of people taking advantage of you. So you want to come over my place. Don't tell your parents where you're going. Put in my jacuzzi.

Don't be a snitch. He did the same thing to Billy Eilish, though, since he's been texting since she was 15. No shit, really? Yeah. Wait, patience. Play in the long game. Like Mr. Miyagi said, you got to wait.

Yeah, yeah. It's like, you know, it's like a long-term investment. You know, it's time to cash out. Yeah, it's a seed. investment. Oh. Hey. Hey, hey,

way, who, who, woo, uh, ha, ah, ha,

ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, I'm feeling alive.

People, people, people, people don't pay to hear noises. Oh, they don't,

no. Yeah, they listen to stern for that. They don't come here. Yeah.

They come here for quality journalism. I want full-on sound effects. It would be great. I really want a toilet flush noise.

Yeah. Tori lanes, you're guilty and the flush. can just run in and out to James's fucking toilet. Yeah, we could break the zoom and go flush the toilet, but nobody wants to hear that. I think that'd be

fun if we did the whole podcast just in the bathroom. Just like, uh, that's a flush and then just or actually every time we don't like something, I just take a full on just shit like, you know? Yeah. That's more blood than usual. Yeah, they really invested

in a sound system. It's a high production value podcast. Yeah, we're like we got like a Foley artist to record be shitting. No, it's all real effects. Okay,

so let's say we won't play a car crash noise. I literally crashed my car live on the show. Just smash my

fucking head. Oh, yeah. But I didn't know that about Drake. Now, I'm not really big Drake fan,

but fucking hell, Jesus, texting the kids, don't be doing it. It ain't doing it. I know, look. You know what's weird about that, though?

It's like, when you're texting someone, right, immediately you're, have just created evidence. Texting is just evidence. It's evidence. You're just, you're creating a

transcript that would be read out in court. It's amateur shit. Yeah, that's amateur hour. Like, look, what you should be doing okay. You got to snatch you off the street. No. You should get your PA to text her. And then, yeah, so it's, he's going down. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that's, yeah. Who is the guy? Was it like NFL or NBA guy that texted a bad baby? You know,

the cash me outside girl? A lot of people are texting her. Yeah, yeah. She was only like 13 or, 14. Let's be honest. Okay. Yeah. I like what he says that. Let's be honest, guys. The rap scene. The rap scene, okay? Yeah, yeah. There's some problematic people in the rap scene. Oh, absolutely. What? Yeah. Look, so I'm just saying, I've heard rumors. A few people had a little taste of the bad baby. Oh, really? Real early on. Oh, wow. And I say a few people, I mean, like, in the room at once. Okay, wow.

So, yeah, they really took that catch me outside. How about that line? I'm like, yeah, we will catch it. We'll certainly will. We've got a net and we know how to use it. Yeah, I've caught butterflies before, my... That's one of the things I found kind of interesting about it. Do you remember when Versatile got cancelled?

Yeah. People were like... Oh, yeah, that really worked. They cannot open for Snoop Dog after they have harassed that late. Snoop Dog literally did a drive-by shooting in 1996. up in court for murder, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, when he was, like, 21. Yeah, funny is like, like, he's up for court for murder, okay? And people are like, oh, that's okay.

He didn't say the word junkie, did he? What? No, I told you that before, like. That's one of the things about versatile, isn't it, that they hate drunkies? Oh, well, just, like, they use, like, problematic words. Yeah, yeah, they, talking about junkies. But, like, what problematic stuff have versatile even said? Well, no.

Oh, well, no, the thing that they got canceled for, which I think is fully fair is that they drove past. Well, they haven't been canceled. Is it the Erica Cody thing? Yeah. She went past her and were like... What, they're shooting the foot, did it? That's the new bar. No, what happened was they were driving past

and I think they just kind of like shouted some abuse at her and drove on. Well, they followed her around the car park, didn't they? No, no, there's actually footage of it. And what they did isn't like... It doesn't look that bad in it. Yeah, like, basically, okay, so she was kind of parked

and they just like drove past, stop the car and went, eh, Erica, and then drove on. But then she went on Instagram as like, they like cornered me or like, you know, you know what was the word she basically they like they blocked her for leaving and she felt trapped and threatened

so it did they block her that's the thing they stopped the car went and drove on it was like three seconds it was nothing oh well then and Snoop Dogg heard about that and was like that is the worst thing you can do while driving by someone in the car

he's like you didn't shoot her amateur are you're off the tour who is this girl anyway she's like a ruin a good bee singer She working with the Illuminati? Eluminati. She's a little

What's her name? Erica Cody. Erica Cody and Charlamine the God. I'm taking down versatile with the Illuminati. She's like

an Irish singer songwriter but she's a woman of color as well. She's good. I think that the friend has rolled his eyes.

The most comical 90s sitcom Iron hole I've ever seen. Yeah, you look like Bill Huxstable

on the Cosby show. I shouldn't have been drinking something to the... Well, yeah, so look, there was then, obviously, people came at it not only from a threatening a woman, but then like a racial angle as well.

It's just the optics of it were real bad. Because they were already, like, they'd already done blackface when they were kids. Yes. And they were already fucking private school guys. I forgot about the blackface private school team. And to be fair, I think that apparently there was like some context where they'd been like

sending our abusive messages and stuff before. So when they drove by it was more right. Okay. Yeah. No, like definitely their behavior has been problematic. But like look at their music. That is, they're just like I don't know, there's like shit posters. You know, they're just like fucking with people. I'm not saying what they did was okay, but like, you know.

Well, everyone has their own opinion. Yeah. Yeah. And what's Erica Cody's address? Just out of the, just out of that. Way. Whoa. Bad turn, lads.

Yeah. I forgot about the blackface thing. But everyone did blackface, like. Yeah, Justin Trudeau did it. Yeah, you're gonna stop Robert Webb from rapping because of pizza. Yeah, exactly. Like, did I ever tell you?

I don't think I've mentioned this on the show before, but these lads were so close to get me doing blackface one year. What? Really? Yeah, yeah. This is a very interesting thing. Yeah, please. They were so close.

I remember, like, it was like Halloween, okay? Yeah. And, you know, I was like, I was like... It'd be great if it was like January. It's like, come on, Brian, do it. It was Easter, okay? they wanted me to be a black Easter bunny It was when they got rid of all the blackface scenes

They wanted me to redo them all Yeah yeah It was just so weird Because these people like And I say people, friends Okay Harlow Yeah yeah yeah

And they were like Brian you'd be hilarious if you all did If you did blackface Okay Wait did they actually use the term blackface Yeah yeah So they knew It wasn't like an innocent

Oh I'm gonna be this person This is like This is okay See that's a bit more problematic Brian, you should do blackface. It'd be great crack. You should do blackface. I was like,

I don't think I should. Okay, like, no, you should. Come on, lads. Come on, Brian. Be fun. Were you even, like, any specific person?

No. No. That's so bad, because that's not like, like, you see it in the 70s where like somebody would be like in a nativity play in limerick. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And they clearly don't know that there's something wrong. Exactly. But they're literally like, you should do blackface. Yeah, yeah. No, they said it because, not because like,

oh, it was an innocent thing. It was like they were like, it'd be so edgy and funny You should do it We're like at a costume party or something No Just where Just for the evening Just in college or something

Just go to election Like what? Did you have to go trick or treating then In Blackface or what was their plan How were you just gonna like They just wanted to let I think what really would have happened okay Is it would have got me in Blackface

And paraded me around the place Going like look at Brian Come on They're ringing a bell Yeah Bring out your sick and poor Just to look at Brian And I was like

I don't think I think that would come back to haunt me like oh come on brine don't you want to be cool like versatile oh god well see like now first title are good yeah i was a good fan of their music before all that stuff went down oh not anymore yeah i remember going to like a it was like a Halloween you know thing in a nightclub everybody dressing up and the song by uh j z and can you s had just come out the beats in Paris and like two girls

like two like really hot girls like it was like a costume like competition or whatever so you could win and they won like second place as the beeps in Paris and in the full blackface I swear to God yeah yeah and this is what are we talking like

2012 yeah it was 11 or 2012 well that has been such a thing in Ireland for the past like 10 years of like a bunch of like young ones going up and singing and Kanye West. Yeah. As like,

oh my God, this is so wild. Yeah, young ones in black, but I tell you now, I'll tell you just, I'll say it again, okay?

I'm gonna put this on wax. I see some of these girls walking around Dundalk, all right? In their little dresses. No, right. With fake tan.

Yeah. And you couldn't tell the difference between that and blackface. Really? Oh, yes. Some of them,

like, yeah, some of it's like, like, I'm not in favor of arresting people for blackface, okay? But like,

you really should for this like this is going to cause this is causing trouble like this is yeah it's insane how black their faces and they're just like yeah it looked like i was on holiday yeah yeah and the well i don't know yeah sorry i stopped myself see i stop myself i let you stop yourself i'm not like you're like brine say it you pussy impress me i just remembered another guy who went in black face god this is such a thing in color i just remembered and i'm not saying names here okay he went the Prophet Muhammad. Ah, right.

Was this kind of around the time, the South Park episode? No. No, this is like six years after that. Yeah, we probably took that long for it to reach. Yeah, yeah.

What's South Park? The Lord letting the Prophet Muhammad in South Park, I'm gonna show them. Yeah, yeah. No, I think this is like probably the year of Charlie Hebdo. Oh, that's like,

2015. Yeah, but he wasn't going like, this is a political statement for freedom of speech. He's like, look, um, this is mad. This will piss him off. But it was a prophet Muhammad but full on blackface

It's like the safest possible To be in Garlo being like Oh yeah is anyone gonna How about our Isis gonna come after me? I'm the prophet Muhammad Yeah That'll show him That'll show them all

Yeah Well I mean here we are like Five years later And ISIS are all but disbanded I think we owe your friend a dead of gratitude I remember that friend as well actually Yeah There were

It ends well for these guys. There's never a story about them rescuing a puppy from a well. And now he's a professor in Trinity. Yeah, but the puppy is like wearing blackface or something. I remember we went out and a night out, okay, you know, the boys are like. So we all went drinking and we all failed to pull, all right? Which is standard, okay? For like, you know, 18, 19 year olds, okay?

Yeah. So he's staying in my room, okay? Okay. And, like, there's a place on the floor from the sleep, okay? put out a blanket in like an air mattress and all that and instead of like going to sleep just kept walking around the room pacing

talking about how horny was oh wow and like hitting the wall Jesus Christ yeah and apparently it was one girl who was like you know being a tease yeah and like she wouldn't respond

to his texts yeah yeah oh my god so he's walking around and I'm just like in bed like a little rabbit like a little teddy bear beside me you got a glass of warm milk I'm just like Do you want to go to bed

And he's like No fucking cocktee Oh my God I just want to fuck something Anything Brian I'll fuck anything right now Anything with a hole Yeah

I'll fuck anything in this room right now I look to the teddy bear And he doesn't mean you You tried to have a You tried to do a bit But he just He just penetrated your asshole this will be funny someday

yeah that's uh that's are you do you still keep up with this friend no no no no it's probably a good call he's probably dead yeah yeah geez i saw one of my friends recently around carlo and i thought it was his dad at first oh really yeah because he looks so bad wow like like it literally it's weird like there's veins in his face now really yeah like he's like hard on the drinking drugs he must be yeah yeah yeah he's a real whiskey guy and he gave me like a look it wasn't a smile now it was like a...

Now, how do you describe that? It was like a real grimaced, like, painful, like... Oh, yeah. It's like... Help me. Yeah, help me. Here he is. Yeah.

Coming back from the big city. The big city of Dundalk. Yeah. He probably thinks like, it's like fucking street to pay for gold up there. Coming back from the dock, you're probably chief editor of the New York Times, are you?

It's like, probably fancy shit like buses up there yeah nothing but caviar and milkshakes up in the dog actually

is there any else you guys want to talk about no we we had stuff we were gonna talk about I have some things

I want to talk about I'm back in college now I'm doing Zoom classes yeah have you done Zoom classes

Matthew no I was already almost finished college and coronavirus started so shit

really yeah and also it just it's all my bad habits are coming back because they can't see you. Yeah. So you just have to sit there and you're supposed to be paying attention listening. Yeah. But you can be doing

anything. You're just like on you. Oh, that's right. I put a block in my phone. Oh, God damn it. Just walk. I can't walk around naked, reading mind camp. Wait, they can't see you. It's all... You turn the camera off. Oh, okay. I was picturing that. What the hell?

So if you, it's the teacher just talking, all right? Or we're supposed to be sitting there at our desk listening. Right. But they can't tell what I'm doing They can't tell I wonder what dorks leave the camera on Well I left the camera on The first time I thought we were going to turn it on

And I was like the only one who had the camera on Could you could tell you were or did You can see in the chat room Everyone has all the squares Oh I see right Did the teacher go Brian you're really freaking me out Could you turn your camera

Brian what's wrong with your face Like there's nothing wrong on my face Oh my God Brian You look so on well Is that a filter is it Oh it's just my face Well take off that dog filter Brian I don't have

Don't filter. It's funny one of her teachers, lectures, okay, she's getting an extension in her house at the moment.

Oh, it's like, builders and drills in the background. She's like, just ignore it. You just see a builder's ass crack. I'm like,

let's come up in the exam. It's so shit. Like, I'm just been reading comic books. Nice. I mean, like,

I remember being in college because like, a lot of college is bold. shit you know what I mean like it's just stupid pointless classes that you don't learn anything in they're really boring and that's when you're actually in the building so I imagine being a structure yeah exactly but that's what I'm saying like as pointless as that feels doing the zoom class must feel way worse like it's just like such bad have I just wake up like five to nine and just

turn on the thing all right don't even get out of bed I don't shower yeah okay ever yeah I'm showered three weeks I'm just lying there eating crisps yeah you just forget that you have a body you're like

it's all on Zoom now yeah I'm plugged into the minutes yeah what does that even matter taste a steak is it real fucking Joey pants

is flying around yeah it's so shit I hate it and I got a year of this I really I did my first day of Zoom class

I was like I really have like ruined my life yeah this is the wrong path and there's kids playing outside my room look at them like

if I could just turn back time and start over again if I could turn back time this is why I know we were talking about earlier but this is why I really just like don't care that much

about the people in Galway because I like pity them so much you would need to go on a massive sash for how their fucking year is gonna be yeah give me one session

let him kill a few old people yeah man like I really look you can't you're not gonna be able to stop young people from going out and drinking you know that is just, that is what they are programmed to do with that age, you know.

You know, I looked up Galway, is it called Galway University or IT? GMIT, that's true. So I looked up, I was looking up controversies, all right? So many things that came up. Galway controversies, yeah. Doesn't exist. No, no such thing. The only thing happens in Galway is women are respected too much.

They're all given doctorates as soon as they enter. Just for swaning around. Doctorates in comedy. Yeah. Okay. So apparently some journalist student tried to sue the college. Okay. Because he did a journalism degree.

And he didn't become a journalist? No, then he found out, like, there's actually, like, a dwindling number of journalist jobs. Oh, right. And he was, like, they should have told him before I signed up. So he sued them. Yeah. Don't think he won. No, I can't imagine he did.

It's funny that, like, you know, how was I supposed to find out that there isn't about that print is dying? Yeah. What, Google it. That's only going to add to the bruntary. problem it's funny i was reading the broadsheets and it didn't mention it at all just the headline everything is fine like i think i said this in the podcast for you know broadsheet and tabloids yeah i think i mentioned this i said that in college ones they're like what are you talking about you knew the difference between a broadsheet and a tabloid

they ridiculed him like you're big free yeah the big book learning over here uh all right brine i guess yeah yeah that's normal to know do you want to teach the class, do you? Guess you learn that in your doom patrols and your daredevils? They thought you were weird for knowing what year 9-11 happened. They thought he was a weirdo because he knew it was to us. How would you know that?

As if I was like named, imagine if I named everyone who died in Jonestown. Yeah. If I named, that'd be a bit weird, okay? They were like, what, you know the year that something happened? You must have done it. Yeah, we know the year? Yeah. That happened in March, didn't it? One of the girls in my

class didn't know what a jury was. that's always going to mention as in like in a courtroom yeah she was like what's that what was the context

we're just talking about like we're in a law class we just start business law okay yeah a jury what's that yeah oh my god

what the fuck man like that is fucking idiot yeah I'm sorry we have to explain it's like you know

those people who sit front role in the court. Have you ever seen any film that takes place in the court ever? It's like, you know that film where Matthew McConaughey has to defend the Oh yeah, he's a ride.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's like, yeah, we were to actually talk about this earlier. Have you ever seen a time to kill? No, I keep seeing it on, it looks like the most 90s comedy movie of all time. Oh, it's very 90s.

It's like 90s John Grisham. But like the whole thing is like Samuel Jackson, shoots these two guys that were, like, raping his daughter. So then at the end, because it's like in fucking the deep south or whatever, everyone's racist, so the lads are going to get off. So Matthew McConaughey basically does this whole big. He reads out in very graphic, horrific detail, all the things that the two guys did to her,

beat her and raped her, left her for dead. And then it's like, the start's like, right, close your eyes. I want to just a picture this. And he reads out the whole thing. And then at the end, he goes, now imagine she's white. And everyone's like, oh, yeah. Yeah, like that's how he wins. My lord.

I saw the trailer for it, and I really wanted to watch it to make fun of it. But then it's like, I think I might watch it for a podcast. It's actually so much fun. I think I'm going to watch it. There's a whole like KKK element to it. And like the dad from that 70s show is like the leader of the KKK. Oh my God. Perfect casting.

It's great. Red Foreman. That was. We got to get Fez. We got to get Fez. Hyde we like Hyde's good people Nothing wrong with him

Tofer Grace is there As David Duke Yeah Yeah He's editing Oh my god Yeah I think what we should do Is you watch

Devil's Advocate Okay And you do an episode And that All right And I'll watch Time to Kill And I'll do an episode in there Which one is the devil's advocate again

That's Al Pacino And Keanu Oh yeah Yeah And he's seen Yeah That's very fun Have you guys

Have you guys ever seen that movie bedazzled. It's a very similar premise, but it's like a Harold Ramos movie. Brendan Fraser and Elizabeth Hurley. Well, actually, yeah. Actually, guys,

it was a British film written by Peter Cook. Yes, I knew this. So then they remade it with Brendan Frazier, two great talents. Yes,

yeah. I'll just remember Elizabeth Hurley in that. Oh, yeah. At one point she's like, I would like to harass her in a car park. One point she's dressed as like a Catholic school girl

and a miniskirt and, it's just outrageous. Yeah, I think I saw that one. I was like, holy shit. You went all Drake. I started, where's Elizabeth Hurley's number? Yeah, I started texting her.

Hey, Elizabeth, fame could be hard. Maybe we should hang out sometime. You ever want to kick it with you boy? Just hit me up. I got those digits. Who the fuck are you? That's not important. I'm the host of a podcast.

You don't really hear about Elizabeth Hurley anymore. She wasn't a very good. She had a blip. She was literally just a model that they started putting me. movies because she was so hot. She couldn't act but she is ridiculously hot like yeah. Like she's in the Austin Powers movie. She is

a make you angry. Not really. Sometimes somebody is so good looking and it's like yeah let them do what they want. They deserve it. It's fine. Oh well we disagree. No, I'm joking. She's good and Austin Powers her and Heather Graham good people. Yeah.

Heather Graham is a pretty good actress. I sure said she wasn't. Well you implied it sir. Oh I meant they Oh, there he goes, rolling his eyes again. God. Now you just say that whenever, you know. You, like, you know, Jane's like, Black Lives Matter.

Brian's roll his eyes. Oh, Brian. Oh, yeah. We'll wrap up soon. I actually have two things I want to talk about. One, we're talking about college is okay. I want to talk really quickly, okay, about the DQIT, I've been of conspiracy security

about my college. Oh, great. Let's do it. Last year, all right, there was a movement where the president of the college decided to move to graduation from the college itself to the town hall in Dundalk. Okay. Okay. Yeah. And then there's a big upset about this, okay?

Right. Where the people in the student union were like, this is a disgrace. It should be in the college. And then they like ran a campaign. They got all the students like, this was a disgrace and eventually moved it back to the college. Yeah, yeah. Okay. I think that was all fake.

Oh, to like just hype up the student union ball. The student union and make them look like they were doing something at all. Because I think at the time, there's no wheelchair ramps. Fake news. Yeah. Right, right, right.

And they're like to distract from the lack of wheelchair ramps. Yeah. We're going to create a thing where it's like, oh, we brought back the grads. Oh, that's pretty good. No, that's actually almost too clever for DGIT. Yeah. I don't know if they could think of that.

I think I might do a, you know, way to have to podcast with George Gibney Yeah, you just like Start harassing the student union Where's the D-KIT president? One more thing You become like a fucking like a student union

truther Yeah, it's like Serpico So yeah, I'm going to investigate that a little more and find out if I didn't, you know, see what the dark center is again That would be great little Patreon miniseries Charlemagne the god was behind that one I end up getting shot on the foot.

Don't ask too many questions. Yeah, and I'm like, just to keep the black man down, you're like, what are you talking about? We just move to grad. And also, another funny thing before we go, I've started to do a podcast about Henry VIII. So I thought it'd be fun if every episode will give you a little update on one of his wives.

Okay, okay. So the first one is Catching of Aragon, okay? Catherine of Aragon. Okay, she's the first wife. Yeah. Okay. Now, it's funny about hers. So the husband, I mean, sorry, Henry 7th, basically orders her.

Oh, like, a be-al-a-bried? Yeah, he's like, yeah, I'm getting this bitch over from Spain. Bring her over, okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So she travels all the way. She gets there and she goes asleep straight away. Then Henry 8 shows up, he's like, where's the bitch? And they're like, she's asleep.

Wake her up. Yeah. Pay good money, you want to see this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so he wakes her up, has a little feel, you know, sees the goods. Yeah, just make sure everything's in work and order. Okay. Some assembly required.

Yeah, so he didn't marry. Matter he's not included. He then marries her off to Prince Arthur. Oh. The older brother of Henry VIII. Oh, yeah, because he was meant to be the king, wasn't he? Yeah, yeah. They dude who pulled Excalibur from the stone.

No. No. I get all my history knowledge from Disney. He was named after him, though, wasn't he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So actually what you said wasn't ridiculous. Ah. Okay, all right?

Yeah, that makes it worse somehow. So apparently he was real sickly. Okay. Okay, really sick, all right? So the night they got married, all right? They actually had, like, children singing as they went to the bed, all right? Yeah. Like a choir, okay?

And then they got into the bed and they draw the drapes, okay? Yeah. And next day he came in was like, yeah, all right, lads, a pormiannale. Marge's thirsty work. I was in Spain last night. What a beautiful weather down there, what me tell you? Very warm and sticky climate, if you know what I mean. Ew, lads, lads, lads.

But then apparently the wife. was like, yeah, we just held hands. He's just bragged everyone. What a fucking smashed your back toes in, lads. Guess who held hands last night? She won't pick him for more. Oh, wow. They just held hands.

Yeah, because he was so sick he couldn't do anything else. And he died like three weeks later. Oh, wow. What a poor little virgin. That's actually kind of sweet and romantic. I mean, for many evil times. It kind of went, like, well, I can't do it, so I'm going to get someone else in here to rape you.

Is that what? Medieval times Come on They were all about it She does then Get banged by Henry the 8th Okay So basically he dies

And we got this Leftover wife Yeah Maybe the younger brother Can have her Yeah And then he marries her Right

All right Yeah And you know Things are kind of going well Yeah And then he sees another bitch Walking around He's like gonna marry her instead

So then he creates divorce He created a divorce Well he created a new religion Because in the Religion Like what's the one of the Pope Runs Yeah, yeah, the church...

Catholicism. Catholicism. Yeah, the one the Pope runs, all right. Yeah, that guy. They didn't allow a divorce. So he started a church of England. For pussy. It was literally...

Yeah, just because he wanted to be able to divorce people. That's why Protestants exist because some guy wanted pussy. For pussy, yeah. Hey, it makes sense to me. I'm going to convert right now. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's what Martin Luther put up in his 97 problems. Y'all better be tapping that pussy.

It's all that, no. Yeah, yeah. Well, how could you like, I don't understand how you can. can be in the Church of England now and be like, yeah, it's a great religion. I mean, he wanted a pussy. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, arguably, I mean, really what's so wrong with it? I mean, it is kind of the whole basis for human existence, sexual intercourse. It's the reason we're all here. What, what better thing to start a religion about? We all want a trip to Spain, lads. Michael, more like Shagaloof.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Maybe the Church of England, they're all just like Rodney Dangerfield. Oh, you come back from Spain. Let me tell you. Oh, you need divorce with these bros. Or like King Ralph. You ever see that? With John Goodman. Yeah, yeah.

The whole royal family died. What was it? I can't remember. But he's like what, like a really like far out descendant of the royal family. Just some like schlub from America. And he shows up. He's like, where's the cheeseburgers? Yeah, yeah.

He's just like this fat America's like, hey, watch a party with a beer. And like, oh, I say, I never. That's every comedy. for the 90s. King Ralph and like Dave, the movie where the guy

replaces the president? Yeah, just endless comedic father. And the joke in that is that the wife kind knows but she's like, yeah, he's got bigger cock,

so. Yeah. Extra inch. So what if he's fucking up Congress in the country. Yeah, and Dave as well

is he's just a cool guy and they're like, sir, what should we do with the poor people? Just give him some money, man. Whoa.

Revolutionary idea. 200 years. We never thought of that. Yeah. What if poor people stop being poor Whoa This guy's crazy Wait so the thing

How many wives did Henry the F have six Six in total So divorced beheaded died Divorce beheaded survived Okay This is divorced right here Well not like survived survived She's not still alive

No she is She's Wolverine So yeah Catherine got divorced She was a sad old woman then Oh she's an old spinster She wasn't allowed any other lovers Yeah well basically like

You know In this time If you're 16, you're an old hag. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Another little interesting thing is her sister got married. This is true love. It's kind of a gothic way to end the podcast, okay?

All right. Her sister got married and the husband died. She kept the corpse around and would make out with it. Oh. Yeah, she'd kiss it and eventually got to stop because he was decomposing too much. That is disgusting. That's like bring her off. Would you not like catch some like disease from that or like, you know?

Yeah, love. Yeah. You catch feelings. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, but don't you, isn't there a thing that necrophiliacs get? It's like, if you, like, fuck a corpse, you can get this, like,

bacteria or some shit like that. Makes you awesome. Yeah, I guess. I don't know, I don't know. I'll do some research on that guy so I'll get back to you. Practical research. I was working in the lab in a late one night.

We did the mash. We did the ones to mash. It was a graveyardsman. Yeah. That song's about A lot of people don't know that But that's true It's about catechlamydia

Of a corpse The graveyard smash Yeah Think about it Think about it Yeah You probably couldn't figure it out Could you?

You bloody Simp fucking idiot That's why I'm investigating DQIT He's like And that fucking corpses Like a legend What about the monster mash?

The monster mash Keep the Black Man down Charlemaine the god fucks It's so funny he picks Charlamagne as well Because you know why Because like The week that

Allegedly Tori Lane's shot Megan a stallion Charlamine the god called him donkey of the week Donkey of the Week Yeah, that's a segment he has in the show called Donkey the Week

Yeah Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Not a bad thing Yeah You're a dumb donkey, all right So because of that Tori Lane's like DeLuminati

Made me donkey of the week I knew that he made me Doggy of the week I love it That's their grand plan Agenda 21 Is to make me

Donkey of the week Yeah Yeah And you're all buying it You're all lapping it up Sheep You're all sheep Plandemic

Okay I think We're gonna start Winding up Oh yeah We're doing well We are at 107 We probably should have

said this In any other recording But is there anything you want to promote Matthew? We've just made you stay here all day.

It's like, guys, why do I got to talk about my stuff? Matthew's like, I got things to do like,

no, you don't. Guys, it's been to be at work like four hours ago. What was the one of the guys

My mother needs her Iltelin, please. What was the guy got me to get a little button on his desk that locked the doors?

Is that Matt Lauer or Chris Wallace? Chris Wallace? Chris Wallace. Oh, yeah. Is one of like the Fox guys? Was he doing the last debate?

Oh yeah. No, it wasn't Oh, probably. It makes sense for Bill O'Reilly. One of those was like Fox guys.

Was it the guy that your man played in the movie the fucking Fox News guy the Oh, Roger Ailes? Yeah, Roger Ailes. Roger Ailes probably as well.

Look, I was trying to say these were harassing you. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to say. I've got a button. Yeah. That's all you need to know. I've got a button. What's to do?

You don't want to know. Big red button. When I press it... By the time you find out it's already too late so don't even worry about it. Yeah. It's the button for Lana, the plug to close that up.

Press that. Oh, my gosh. She goes wild. But yeah, Matthew, you got anything that you want to plug? I don't know. I guess people should follow me on Twitter and Instagram. I make some videos and stuff. Yeah, you've been putting up good stuff.

I actually really like your Twitter. It makes me laugh. Oh, thank you very much. I sometimes look up, what's your name? It's like Matthew XXX. Yeah, it's like. No, are you promoting the XXXXTian? Pretty, uh, not walk.

he was a bit of a character I'd say it like that he was he was a rap scallion I swear it's a coincidence I had the name before he did he was if anything referencing me XX DJ Dagger Dick DJ Dagger Dick

That's what I call him I'll change my handle too for Halloween DJ Dodger Dick Is that like a seven reference Probably isn't No probably not Yeah XX XX XTangian If they remade Dennis the Menace

Mr. Westard Skinny Bap man's gonna get shot blood no yeah anyway I really don't know a lot about him I just know that he was a he was a wild character well I'm dad he's dead and match he's alive so yeah okay yeah me too

the right the right XXXX lived yeah that's we'll say it like that tell us your Twitter handle yeah it's at Matthew underscore Talon and then on Instagram it's at Talon Matthew we'll put it up in like the link or description or whatever it is you won't do that

cool yeah I have someone coming out of I'm not doing that I don't commit yourself the technological feats. I don't know how that works. Typing with words. Links.

I'm also looking to move out of my parents' gap. So if anyone, I'm promoting myself as a possible roommate. If anyone heard me on this and he's like, he seems pretty cool.

Trust me, you don't want to live with any of our fan bass. I'll tell you that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just a guy dressed up like a bear.

Yeah, he just heard that. He's like ringing in. He thinks it's a radio show. I'm calling for the roommate. It's a domino's pizza. Please stop calling You were very abusive Last night

Alright guys Yeah we'll leave it there But yeah Go follow Matthew Talon on Twitter Instagram All the things with Are you on TikTok? I am on TikTok

Oh no I know Hey look You know what If I wasn't in my 30s I'd probably be on TikTok Have you seen those Holocaust videos on TikTok

No What a great sentence No TikTok Holocaust I don't think they're historically accurate Yeah, it's like the sorrow and the pity Took four hours to cover the Holocaust But some 15 year old girl doesn't have 15 seconds

It's like, I don't know what the intention is There's these videos, okay, where it's like a girl going Like, it's like black and white And they kind of make them look like They're not wearing makeup or anything They're meant to look a bit like, you know Sure, under the weather Yeah, okay, like hi

And you know the way TikTok don't actually talk And just text Yeah So it comes up like, hi, my name's Sarah I look skinny. I was in the Holocaust. Six million people died. End the video.

Wow. So you doing that, are you? I don't know. I don't really understand alternative comedy, so maybe that one goes over my head. But the thing is, like, I think it's meant to be, like, in their heads, like, I'm promoting Holocaust awareness.

People need to, people won't know about the Holocaust unless I do a video about it. Well, to be fair, I would think that's dumb, but then you meet, like, the one who doesn't know what a jury is. Yeah, it's true. She knows the Holocaust.

God, I'd be so interested to find out what they think the Holocaust is. Is that a nightclub in Nuri? My cousin got fingered in the Holocaust, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, lad bought her a shot of an absent and he fingered her. Six million people got fingered. And then there's like fingered deniers like, where's the pussy juice? Huh? Where's the pussy juice?

It was more like 2 million, 1 million. million tops okay let's end it there thanks for listening bye bye