Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Harry Birthday Star Trek

Episode Date: September 10, 2026

Harry Birthday Star Trek by Brian and James F**K Each Other

God forbid. Heaven for fend. You miss the gold. The fucking gold I'm spitting right now. Here we go. Subliminal, criminal. I hit him with a little bit of rhythm and a synonym. Perfect gentleman, just like cinnamon. I'm a dog like win-tin tinning him. Yes. Yes. I can't join in. The other way, yes. Why not? Why not? I can't rap. I can't. I try to rap one time. I remember I end up puking everywhere. Because it was like this brown man made me drink. Don't look at me like that.

racist. This brown man made me drink all this alcohol and I was dizzy. Right. Yeah. Don't really know. I can't remember much else. And then he made you rap. Yeah. Oh, it's a gang rap. That's what happened. You're a victim of a gang rap. Yeah. Yeah. They all took turns on you.

Yo, what's up? I'm finna bust the nut. This motherfucker, yeah. Keep his asshole shut. Mothuggy. Yeah? Like that? It was a gang rap. Yeah. You're out of train on you. wrap back at I tried to

wrap back at them they ran a soul train on you soul train you tried to wrap back

let me hear it spit some your name is Clarence and your parents have a real good marriage

and then he came on me you happy now are you reliving this trauma oh no it was actually a

comedian I was doing a show where he wanted to do like comedy and other stuff stuff.

It's always fun when they try to incorporate other stuff because as we all know comedy is just such a horrific dog shit art form that just jamming literally anything else into it

makes it better. Like fucking lipstick on a pig, you know what I mean? The thing was you're meant to do other stuff like rap and what else did it?

I think there was like a thing where to shout out a topic you have to make a joke out of it straight away and if you couldn't you have to drink whiskey. Okay. I couldn't do anything.

So you were just plied with alcohol against your will. And then I puked it all over a table. Wow. And then literally like... During the gig? Right after the gig, yeah. When I were like, hey, you know, comedy's pretty hard. You know, I think you didn't...

Don't be so sad, Brian. Just like that scene in Team America. Brer! You fucking bomb! You gave up on life, didn't you? Sick reference, bro. Team America. And literally like a year later,

I met someone who was like, you know, some German guy. He was like, yeah, I went to Ireland before. I remember I saw you. You ruined my trip to Ireland, yeah? I thought Irishman drink lot of whiskey. You had one sip and puked blood for an hour. I just sniffed it. I was like, oh, this got into my head.

I've been date raped. Somebody help. I've been date wrapped. I've been date wrapped. Somebody help. Yeah. Hey, there we go. Oh, yeah.

Well, we're having a good time here. Now, I know you don't like it, but I will say you are drinking. And for some reason, when I say you're drinking, I'm just letting the audience know, okay? But you always get really offended by them. Do they need to know, though, is the thing? Does it really benefit them to know if I'm drinking or not?

Well, I didn't think it was a secret. And really, what is the point of you highlighting it then? Really, let's get down to the nitty-gritty. This is the issue. It's deconstructed. It's kind of like when I say you're a paedophile, you get all like, well, no, no. Well, the audience doesn't need to know I'm not a paedophile.

Just it benefits. the audience to know whether or not I'm a paedophile. Does that hinder their enjoyment of the show? Me, thinks not, sir? I'm just making a comment. I'm just painting a picture here. Well, you're right, I'm drinking. You're on your one, two, three,

fifth can. Fifth can. Took a while the count there. I was a bit worried, you know, carried a one. That was, uh, yeah. So fifth can. Yep. I might buy you some more afterwards. No, no. This is it. Because this is like the end of the party here. Right. Yeah. To be honest with you, the party ended about five years ago.

we've just been hanging on for dear life. Literally eating the bag, not licking it, eating the bag. You know, when the brazer is dead in the corner and you try to do a weekend at Bernie's with her, you know what I mean? It's been five years and I'm still trying to like, I can bring her back to life, come on. I swear she squirted that one time. I can make it happen again.

I do a kiss of life. Yeah. Breathe into her asshole. What, felching? Is how it felching is? Is it? I believe felching. This is very disgusting.

Sorry, okay. On the Patreon, we're talking about Guy Burgess and the Cambridge Boys. I thought it was a very educated episode. Hi, bro. Even though you kept trying to ruin it, you know, you're like, oh, what if there was a black fella there? Yeah, I know your tricks. That's me. He summed me up in one.

That's the extent of my comedic prowess. What if there was a black fella there? That's what he thinks of me, ladies and gentlemen. Well, that's why the show works, you know. Equal respect. Yeah. Yeah, I would say it probably is, yeah, on equal footing. Well, I normally say we have a lot to talk about.

Not too much talk about you almost, did you? Oh. Pretty loosey-goosey this episode. All right. The listeners have suggested some stuff to mention Jake Lang. Jake Lang? Yeah, you're following him? No, who's that?

Just to go through, I'll let you decide, okay? So I've written down a list of things on this envelope here for a guy. I'll say his name, you know? Go ahead. Yeah, you could try. pal this will be fun go on say his name this is weird it's it's mr s dot m that's true yes okay no go on abu taboo tib i would say so it's mr dot mr stop mr stop m stop abu taib should we open it is it legal don't open a letter for someone else i think it is yeah yeah we're

beginning being bummed in prison. Oh, opening now! I go to the guard station. Look at me, officer. Oh, an open letter. Detective, I believe you're looking for me. Driving out to the desert, look for it. An open letter.

What's at the letter? What's in the envelope? If you kill him, he will win. What a good movie. That's a good ass man. You know what? You know the way like when you're a kid you're like oh fucking movies are awesome you know watching like Goodfellas

Yeah, 7 South fucking uh what South Park Well yeah South Park I was gonna say Jurassic Park But then South Park Because I'm a retard I'm a drunken retard Brian are you happy now?

That's what he knew You're drinking And it affected him you know We have a family meeting and all that Oh yeah Jurassic Park Yeah When Cartman the dinosaur said, respect my

territory. You killed Newman. Dapsin, Dapsin, we got Dapsin here. See, nobody cares. This is mental. This is the ramblings of two schizophrenics. Well, we're at the end of a road, okay? Because we're getting, we should, we're squatting

right now. Yeah. Jack Teeling's going to call Black Rock. Like, we're, we're breaking the law again. Pretty much. We haven't paid the rent. We're like outlaws, man. We're like Billy the Kid and Jesse James. We're like Telma and, um, Louise Yes

That was it Yeah I got that I was like Oh tell them in South Park That's you that is Selma and Ike

Brofluski Yes What was my point in there So like So we didn't pay the rent No The landlord said Get out

And he wants us Leave straight away Yeah I said November I was a pretty Big Dicking him Yeah Yeah

It's like yeah Make me I will Oh shit Oh fuck no I'll suck it now I promise

Over the phone So So um Where was Oh yeah, so we didn't pay the rent this month. And I, be honest with you, I was like, we gotta pay the rent man. We got, I can't take

this anymore. Yeah. It's like, you know, I'm gonna crack, we'll call the FBI. I'm gonna wear a wire. Yeah, I flushed the rent down the toilet. You're like, why did you do? Caden, we needed that rent money, Cadden. They weren't going to find it. I've got to, I'm sticking a gun

in my pussy. Anyway, okay, let's move on from that, right? Yeah, that's too. My point is I've got some very normal topics talk about So there's the far right activist Jake Lang We've got some Fetterman updates John Fetterman

Yeah Star Trek More than a minute I think it deserves It's a 60th anniversary of Star Trek Right so we can talk about it Okay That's what I'm kind of looking forward to To be honest to you know

Everything else is like just Window dressing yeah Radium Girls Radium girls It's actually surprisingly good is about the women who I won't go into it it's the women who

remember the radiation poisoning they were licking the pens you ever hear that story no what's this now well maybe we talk about it now educate me Brian and also there's a steam rally coming up

I went to a steam rally this weekend a steam rally yeah it's pretty good yeah it's like a rally you go to a bunch of men there you know right and what what do you do you look at a steam engine

oh I see right yeah okay actually pretty cool Richie Kavana was there no way dude Yeah. Oh man, this is what the level I want to get with us. Okay?

So you get to the steam rally, it's all these steam engines, and then you go to the jacks, all right? Right. And when you're going to the jacks to the car right beside the jacks, and Richie Cabin is there. Nice. And if you pay a tenor, you can take a picture with him. So he's got his van parked right next to the Port-a-Loo.

Yeah. That's basically like an onsuit for his car, isn't that? But he can't get out of a car. Ah. Yeah, he just shits in the back seat. He shits in a bag, and then he pays somebody to flush it down the, the Portaloo. But then I'm sure all the fan girls are like,

no, Richie, please don't flush it. I want to keep it. The girls were so wet looking Richie Kavanaugh. Of course they were. An old man. They're red-blooded women, you know. They have feet, you know. Move over, BTS.

Yeah. What are you going to say you're like, these women, they have, you know? I was going to say red-blooded women, they have a feeling, they have souls, you know. I don't know. I don't know what women do, you know. None of them get wet when they

look at me until I spit on them. Hey, hey, there's the old trick. Sorry, what? That's disgusting and weird and gross. I'm awful. I'm a terrible person. I hate myself. No, keep drinking. You've hit a peak there. You've got to power through it. I knew should have bought some emergency cans. You should. Maybe we crouching tiger hidden nagging, man, you know?

I was thinking of buying you surprised nagging and forcing it down your mouth. You wouldn't need to force it, brother. You'd need to force me from swallowing the whole thing. Glass and all, you know? Anyway, come on. Pick a topic and talk about it. Radium girls. Real quick. So I always heard this thing where there was these women in America

and used to paint clock faces, all right? This kind of a luminous substance that was radium. And sort of glow in the dark kind of? Yeah, so you can look at your clock and it's glowing dark, right? The problem is all the women got cancer. Ah. Yeah. And I always heard the stories like, so the women would

put the pens in her mouths, okay, to make it nice and straight. Oh, Jesus. To paint accurate numbers. They're sucking on radium then. Yeah. I remember thinking like, that's unfortunate. The women, why would they do that, you know?

But they were told, in the film, it's this a film but it has Joey King in it. Okay. You know her? Yeah. Yeah. Joey King and the red head from the boys. So a star-studied cast. And not Mave, the other one.

The one that gets shit on all the time. Yeah. I know who you're talking about. So. Mave, she's Irish. She's Irish. I think she's not. She's a, it works in a rotunda.

Yeah. She quit acting to become a nurse in the rotunda. Yeah. Because that's how bad Hollywood is. She quit. James is shy. She quit Hollywood to go be a fucking work, like to work at the HSE. That's how you know Hollywood is done.

And you're always in the rotunda, aren't you? Well, it's a maternity hospital only for pregnant women. I tell you. But I put a wig on and they're like, Jesus, you're look ready to pop, love. You're glowing. They're absolutely glowing. Like a baby coming. You can be shuddy.

Yeah. Aren't I hilarious? That's great, Brian. I'm like both selector. That's great. That's good for my confidence, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, I'm so fat that I look like a pregnant woman.

Great. You enjoy yourself, do you? You said it. No, you put it in my brain, though. Yeah, you planted that seed. Let it germinate, you know? I'm sad now. It's me's fault.

Be angry at her. I will be. Always be angry with a woman, not me. Yeah, that's true. Anyway. Yeah. So, So, what's it called now?

The Radiom girls. So it turns out they're actually told to lick the pens, and they were told the radiation is actually good for you. Right. It cures on wee. I see. And it actually fixes impotence, that's what they said. Yeah.

Yeah. Like it's... Female impotence. Well, as they just said, it does everything, you know? Okay. Like, they're taking a bottle and selling it to the mart. Kind of like spinach for Popeye, you know? Literally.

But instead, it made them all die slowly of cancer. Ah. And you know their bones are going to be radioactive for, like, a tallyallyacted. thousand years. Fucking out. So actually a lot of science nerds do this, you know, like Brainiac, you know, John Tickle.

They go to like the graves. Yeah. Don't laugh at this. They go to the graves of women, okay? And they get their little radiation thermometer, okay? And it goes,

beep, beep, beep, beep. Now, I really hope that the local council put out a message for the necrophiliacs in the area. It was like, boys, I know you love the old grave robin and, you know, banging the corpses and all. I don't know why they sound like,

where is this happening in England? Like California. California. You got in on there now? Well, I just cut back from a big surf there. I was ripping the serious waves so I was. Jesus, it was absolutely bodacious, tubular, so it was. But all the necrophiliac now boys don't be fucking stick in your cocks in the fucking radiation gravely.

Without just make him want to do it more, you know, those daredevils. Yeah, like, burn now, nah, nah, nah. We're going to fucking, gonna bang the radioactive corpse. He made radioactive pussy, bro. Now this is like the, I think the 50s, all right. And it's crazy just how fucked up it is where, so these women are literally like their hair's falling out. They've got like fucking, you know, three ears and no teeth.

Sorry, what is the purpose of this to, for the drawing the clock faces on just... How am I going to know what time it is? Oh, so they're like in a factory making clocks. Yeah. Right, okay. The clock factory. I thought it was like some kind of performance art piece or something, you know? I thought it was like Banksie, you know?

You didn't explain it, to be fair. I'm afraid of it. You should be able to read my mind. I've always said... So these women are being... They're like, they're literally dying. And the manager's like, meh, she's probably got syphilis. Probably because she's a whore.

And then like, they die and they're like, yeah, her sister got syphilis, I presume. She was a virgin, but yeah, that's just... Mm-hmm. That's just how big a slut she was. I see. That's ironic now that they were doing that, making clocks because...

They ran out of time, Brian. well that's very good it's not very good but it's pretty good it's not good at all actually but you've lowered the barred such a degree that even

just the semblance of a point or an idea is worth it you know because for three seconds you weren't talking about necrophilia so we'll take the winds where we can get them and we'll plow through

yes, yes you know But these women are like actively dying alright and I mean like proper like

their teeth are falling now and all that they got like three eyes and they have a factory what you call

like factory owned doctor the factory like the factory's doctor will come around he's like yeah you're just not

brushing your teeth well enough so I brush it twice a day ah you probably didn't do you floss if you don't floss

you'll get cancer but my tongue like their tongue is like green and their shit in blood yeah Probably brushing too hard. Ah, yes.

Okay. You got to, you know, it's consistency, but you don't want to go too hard, you know? And then all the women died. But the film is pretty, it's a pretty cheap-o film. It's just kind of, like, it's mostly like a courtroom thing

of like, and all I like about it is no subtlety, you know, the people who own the business, like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, I love it, and women die for profits. Yeah. And then they're in the back of the courtroom, you know, watching it, woman being like, I'm dying and I'll never see my children grow up and the millionaire smoked a cigar.

Be like, ha ha ha. Don't worry, touch. We'll put him to work in the factory. Ah, yeah. It'll be swimming in paint. Yeah, so I watched that and it was like pretty grim. I know you were chuckling and laughing. Well, that's, you know.

And jerking off. Well, you know, it's the only way that I can make it through this. You've got to find light in the darkness. this crazy world. I see all the terrible things out there in the world. And I think, hey, if you can't, oh, what was the quote? I heard a very good quote there, someone said there.

Where it's like saying you can't make a joke about something bad. It's like saying you can't think of a disease, a cure for disease. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah. And you have the goal to criticize me. That's the real cruelty of this situation. of this dynamic

that you can just kind of ever like just this incoherent babble and you take pride in it as well I saw your little face you walk away and think like that was a great point oh I nailed him there he got hitched slap by the

toler move over Chomsky yeah so that was kind of a depressing film and I watched some Star Trek afterwards and that made me even more depressed Because it's 60 anniversary, right? Yeah. The actual Star Trek's being broadcast right now.

Their episode for a 60 anniversary was a soap opera parody. Right. They're always doing parodies and... In this new... What is the new one called? Strange New World. Strange New World.

The one that's airing right now. Yeah. Okay? It starts off... So they had puppets? So I'm trying to think of it now. Did puppets one week. Did the hangover before that?

Right. They've done... Oh yeah, the episode... week before it was 24. Right. So what it did is, and this was like, again, was not good, but it didn't have puppets in it. And I was like, this like,

it's not shite. Okay. And I was almost like watching and be like, what the fuck's going on? I don't want to kill myself. Just cut myself, but not, you know, deep enough to hit a vein.

It's like, you know, when you're having sex and you don't want to kill yourself. No. I don't think anyone can, I don't know what you're talking about. That is a feeling that doesn't, that exists. We live in fantasy world. It's like the invention of lying over here. It's like,

it's like, I had sex, but didn't want to kill myself and her at the same time. Has that ever existed in the world? And just like that, Brian O'Toole had discovered a new feeling. And let's you see, things get pretty wacky. Remember the invention of lying? Yeah. Yeah. I watch it every day. Of course. Louis C. Is in there? He is. He was lying. I actually I'll be honest I've only watched it once and I kind of forget

I was not sorry God I wasn't that impressed with it oh my word I know I see you've got your Ali Katz

t-shirt on signed by Carl Pink Pilkington impersonator man Ali Kat is so bad we watch a little bit of it

it's so forced it was so lazy it was unbelievably I didn't get a lot so like oh yeah yeah

I'm like fucking dead things. And another cat will come and like, yeah, we're talking about fucking dead things?

Oh, charming. Charming? He says charming. Fucking charming. He says you fucking good. Yeah,

it's like just, is it like they recorded a podcast and animated over it, but even less effort than that. Like the Ricky Jervais show. So they animated the podcast.

Yeah. That was taking something good and animating it. Yeah. It's a similar kind of dynamic where the conversation between the characters it feels like that

like it's a podcast like it's just like a laid back conversation that they've animated over but it's so fucking lazy and bottom of the barrel yeah like one guy just says oh charming and then for like two minutes everyone's like charming the fucking cusses chow oh that's fucking charming is it

it's like we've missed something yeah we've cut out like a 20 minute block there and like that's a call back to something it feels so unearned, unsatisfied. And if it was just that, if it was just like, oh, we did a podcast and added something to it, it's one thing, like the Ricky DeVay Show on HBO.

But they also try and do like a narrative as well. Yeah. Then they try and do the whole fucking afterlife thing of like, yeah, we're going to go out and look at that. A little bird is dead. Will he go to heaven? No, there is no heaven. What, what do you mean?

There's no heaven? But I thought there was heaven and hell and Jesus and God. No, all there is his cats. I wish Derek was Prime Minister. It's all that shit. It should be a crossover episode where Derek comes in and hugs the cats too hard and kills them. He's rubbing him the wrong way. Jammin, fucking jamming.

I go fucking squished by a mongolite jamming, he says. Yeah, terrible, really bad. Yeah, it's so hard. I think they're only like 50. minute episodes as well low effort there of course he on Twitter is like yeah look at

that the biggest show on Netflix all these twonks are offended by it like yeah and I'm one the twunks then I feel bad oh he got me he's calling me a twunk I'll never recover from this I yeah

like this thing everyone's like this is just bad like objectively bad like it's just very poor quality and his is like oh they're offended by it. The left wing media are after me again. In terms of fan bases, he's not like, you know, like a Burke Kreut or Kevin

Smith where it's like, they keep putting out worse and worse shit. And I assume the fan base after a while, like, you can't keep defending it. So the fan base were getting smaller and smaller. Yeah. Like, if you're interested, it's how much longer you can milk this. Like, how long until Netflix's kind of like,

well, this isn't that really worth it? Yeah. I mean, I don't know. Man, this seemed to. Like, he says, you know, oh, this got like, you know, a million views in the first episode, you know, the first day. Yeah, like, it's a huge hit. But Netflix doesn't release their figures or we don't know that. And also, they could just like pay a bunch of bot farms to...

We have to do that. Because no one checks anyway. They'd be like, yeah, it's actually the biggest show ever. Okay. And they always do that. It's like, oh, you know, the night age in season five? Biggest show on Netflix. Is that right?

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. And everyone, the fact that you haven't watched it, you know, it's actually embarrassing for you. Ah, well. stick it on the pile me if that's an ever-growing list all the young ones in the bus

are like, hey look at him he's not watching the night manager fucking smelly cones is that what I think? I fucking knew it but if you watch the night manager would be like oh look at he's fucking sexy

what got a massive cock on him yes all right it's just me in a dresser what's this show called what's it called again I need to write it down finally I'm going to turn it all around yeah I didn't watch much

Ricky Javaz's thing now. I wonder what I'll do next. He's got a stand-up show coming. What's the thing, man? Are you ready? I mean, am I ever? You aren't surprised. Am I ever ready for? Oh, he's a cat, in he? AIDS.

That was bad, wasn't it? Oh, are you? Oh, look at your faces. You're offended now? I remember working with these awful people in a sales job, okay? Right. And a few of them didn't invite me actually now. Maybe I'm the twunk. No, there's few lads, okay, they bought tickets for Ricky Jervais. And they bought tickets before I started working there.

So that's why they didn't invite me. Is that right? Yeah, yeah, I see. What about, then they called me up and saying, Hey, are you a friend of Bryant's? We've got a free ticket here, you know? I actually got a few tickets. We're going to burn the other ones.

Just don't tell Brian, all right? But yeah, so they went to see Ricky Javis when he was in Dublin one time, right? Free arena. Yeah, fucking massive. And afterwards, like, the day after, I was, like, chatting to him. And like in the office, I wasn't like, he's very derivative. And I was just like, all right, yeah, cool. Yeah, I like, I like extras.

Yeah, you know, he was trying to be like, you know, go to the flow. And I was like, oh, so what he's talking about? And they were like, they couldn't name a series. Like, oh, yeah, it was fucking great. Yeah. What was about? Oh, like, he was just saying things that you couldn't say. Like, what?

Ah, just fucking mental. Oh, man, he's talking about like fucking, you know, raping, oh, fucking crazy. Because a lot of these things. It made me rethink about rap. It's like, maybe it's not that, you know. I mean, hey, look, if we're all for equality, maybe equal blame on both sides, you know,

makes you think so it does, yeah. Oh, but the, oh, the you know-whoos won't like it, you know? Come, you don't like you either, Brian, do you? You blue hair. Oh, yeah, so Star Trek, all right? Oh, fuck, this is Star Trek. Yeah, it is. It's a Star Trek Minute.

I've only got a minute here or so fucking Star Trek the gun's talking about Star Trek Alright go on Star Trek So the last episode Last week all right It was a 24 episode Where the ship gets

This is going to sound bit stupid The ship gets caught in like The gravitational Something of a planet But basically Pull No that doesn't sound right

You know I think it's like the Spectrumom or something like that Okay The gravitational Vortexatronaheed the mega anus or whatever okay so the ship is going

faster and faster and it can't slow down and eventually it's going to go so fast it disintegrates right so it's a real time they got an hour for the ship disintegrates and they do like a split screen thing at 24 yeah yeah

so like in one section the gravity's fucked and Klingon Sutherland yeah and you're like Vulcans like Muslims oh yeah now was that in that

or did you add that? Would you believe I added that? Is that in your spec script? Would you believe Hollywood couldn't come up with that? Too afraid. Me and Ricky, we're taking it. Falking Muslims. They don't need boats too,

they're coming here on spaceships. Space rape, that's what they're doing. Space growing gangs, space kebab shops. Hmm. Call Ricky. show the twunks all right so it's 24

so it's 24 so one side of the ship the radiation is fucked so like they have to crawl around the place you know it's very hard to move around right another section is radiation leaks so it's like oh no I'm dying in radiation another section

there's like a doctor and a young sexy nurse and the doctor actually something is falling on top of them so if you remove it is organs fall out okay so they got to try deal with all that and then Scott East there be like, eh, did that what did, you know.

And then that's basically, at the end they slow down. Okay. And I was like, look, there's no Muppets, maybe things are changing, all right? Like, I don't want good Star Trek, I just don't want to kill myself

when I watch Star Trek, right? The next episode, all right? It's a, you know, you know, days of our lives? Yeah, like the soap opera? Yeah, what Joey was on. Yes. Imagine that put Star Trek was an hour.

Right. So the captain, the captain wakes up. and he's like, whoa, why is the lighting different? And they're like, Captain, you've got, and they look, you know, space madness. Why are you pausing for dramatic effect? Why am I talking like this? Why are you looking to the camera? You know, all that.

Right. It's funny, isn't it? Do you ever watch Deadpool and think this is way too funny? Uh, I, I watched Deadpool and my thought was, I wish I was fist out in a pool. Dead. I hate Deadpool. Ryan Reynolds and Kerry there. Was he? Yeah. Right. Why? The Kerry Airport, I think.

Okay. Good. You haven't been following that? No, I haven't. I'm afraid. Oh, I go to the airport all the time. Look for celebrities. Ryan, that's who you see us. Ryan Reynolds, uh, Ryan Tupperty as well. They were hanging out together. Ah, the Ryans. The two Ryans.

That boys, yeah. There's a podcast I'd listen to. What if Brian joined into the Rhine? No. No. Ruined. It's a be at the start. Cancelled. I know.

No, fuck Deadpool. Fuck Ryan Reynolds. Fuck Marvel. Fuck Disney, dude. Oh, no, no, no. We're doing Marvel Minute in a minute. You're going to eat your words. Everyone wants Marvel Minute back and I can't deny the fans.

Who are these people? What? Fucking Muppets in your bedroom? The people in the walls. Ah, yeah. Who tell me to do things. Yeah, so basically, it's a soap opera thing. and that's very funny.

And then you'll Rees Darby, he shows up he's a space wizard. It turns out he's playing tricks on the captain. Yeah, you're in a soap opera. Yeah. That's for loss in spice. What do you think of that? Yeah, and that's an hour.

Great. Yeah. I'm loving it. And I was so depressed after that. I was actually, you know, like Forrest Gump, which is up the building. I was sick of the Black Panthers and Star Trek

and I was going to jump, I have AIDS. But then I was like, I want to go back watch some classic Trek. Right. I watch one, the classic ones, A Mock Time. Okay.

And that one starts off. And, you know, Spock? Yeah. He's acting emotionally. Ew. Yeah, he's freaking out, you know? He's depressed and he's, like, getting angry at people. Right.

Or, like, someone brings him soup. He's like, I don't want soup, but he throws the soup at a woman's face. Okay. Yeah. People are like, why is he acting like this? It turns out, Spock's people, the Vulcans, you know the way we get horny sometimes? Yes.

Yeah. Spock's people, they get horny every 11 years. Okay. So every 11 years, they have to mate. And if it don't mate, they get so horny to go insane and they die. So every 11 years? Yeah. So when they were 11, they all had to lose

their virginity? No, no, only after puberty. That's the right thing because new people of you be watching it. Oh, Mr. CBS. I found a loophole. I have to do it. I have to save him. He'll die otherwise. Oh, I gotta give that little girl

The Vulcan nerve pinch Let me I don't know what that is You ruined it now You tried to incorporate actual lore Into the pito gang You've ruined paedophilia Congratulations

Well done Brian Yeah So he's acting real horny But the thing is like He doesn't want to tell anyone He's embarrassed It's pretty you know You know when you're horny

You're not gonna tell your boss Like boss I'm too horny I'm gonna kill myself You can't do the Satanta, right? Oh, I think it goes without saying in Satanta. They know. No, but you're kind of like, it's not written in any form that I can't. Say I'm horny and I'm telling myself.

So, it's like, the film where the dogs, you know, bud, you know that dog film, Bud Light Dog. Air Bud? Yeah, where that dog's horny. What? Or plays basketball or something. It's not in the rules that I can't be a dog. Oh, right. Okay, okay.

Jesus Christ. What? Fucking hell. It's like when lassie's trying to tell me. What's that boy? Airbud and hoardiness and it's out of the rules. And Star Trek? Yeah.

Vulcan Nurepinch. All right. So he's kind of like captain, we need to go back to my home planet. And, you know, Captain Kirk's like, why? I can't tell you. He's like freaking out. Right.

And he's got a knife. Spock's got a knife. It's like London, okay? He's got a knife, all right? He's hiding it. And Kirk's like, oh, shit, he's not messing around here, you know? And he's like, okay, we want to turn the ship back to your planet. And I loved the little bit there where, like, he's,

Kirk after, it's like, come on, you can talk to me, man on man. Okay, what's going on? He's like, it's my biology with mating. And Kirk's like, I know the story, pal. Why didn't you say something? I could get some horrors over here right now. Suck your Vulcan balls dry, motherfucker. Sulu's up for it.

Oh, hello, I believe I can be of assistance. No! I've got a knife. Get away from me, I've got a knife. Oh, that won't to tell me, old boy. I like a bit of a challenge. They call it rough play. Rough play?

That's what you'd call it, yeah, when two gay guys have a bit of a scuffle. It's all right. Yeah. No way you're going to bar fight. Yeah. Yeah, that's a bit of rough play right there. Right, that's like foreplay of the rough play. Yeah, yeah.

Okay. Anyway, so actually relates to the episode, actually, because so the way it works is you go back to the home planet of Vulcan and you have like your mate. So Spock, it's like a child bride thing. Spock is a child paired off with T-pring. Okay. Teapring's very sexy in this. Right. And T-pring, she's a real bitch, though.

Because you have to, you can't just go there and shag your misses. The woman picks a fighter, all right? and you've got to defeat that guy in Den Shaggar. What? Yeah. So you only get to bust the north if you kick someone to death. Well, not death, but you've got to defeat them in combat. Oh, okay.

Yeah. And she's a real bitch, because she could pick any Vulcan she wanted. She's like, now, I want you to fight your friend, Captain Kirk. Captain Kirk's like, I don't want to cock block his spot. Dude, it's bros before hose. I'll do what you need to bust or not. But no, it has to be a real fight. But it's not to the death.

Well, it doesn't have to be. It can't be the death if you wanted to be. Okay. It's legal. How horny are you, really, you know? You can't impress me here, yeah? You're on half a chubby. That's the thing.

Oh, you didn't actually kill him, so I'll just jerk you off while you fondle my tits over the bra. That's all you get. I mean, that's monaun mating right there, you know? You didn't kick a Protestant to death, so. I'll wank you off, minimal eye contact, and you can call me mommy just once.

Mommy wants milk. Baby wants to fuck. I never actually had a call the girl Mommy, actually. No, me neither. Well, still time. Yeah? Well, except for that one girl, that was a bit of a, she was my,

so, you know, that's a bit of technicality, I suppose, you know. Family reunions, they get crazy, you know? Well, I like the message. I had a little Mani Shevitz. I was feeling loose, you know? Oh, you see. I like the team this episode because basically,

Kirk and Spock have a big fight, all right? And it's like, come on, you got to be, like, you know, throwing in a towel. You got to do a proper fight. And Spock defeats Kirk. But you know what? The fight, actually, it's almost like a postnut clarity after the fight.

Because then T-Pring is like, okay, you defeated your friend. now you can stick it in he's like no actually it's actually more important to hang out with men on a spaceship than have sex with a woman

so he came in his pants when he was fighting Kirk and then he's like oh you actually did something wrong so now I'm not going to bang you this is your fault though you're a weird bitch you've got wonky tits

I'm not into it I'll see you later yeah and then he goes he's all been there brother you know That's how it goes. But there is something like, I think, satisfying about that, you know? Just denying a woman's sex and hanging out with your male friends. I do that all the time. Every woman I need.

Every time you go to a shop, like, not today, they... Yeah, yeah. I'm not... My eyes are up here. Unfortunately, I don't have any friends, but I come back and I watch the Flegre 2 podcast and that's just as good, you know? And then they all start calling you a cuck. your Indian wife got gaped out in a frat house

Oh no How did you find out about that? Your podcast co-host got gaped out He said he was a virgin Yeah so I watched an episode And actually there's a good bit of sex in Star Trek Okay

I mean it was a 60s And people were kind of pushing it Like another episode I watched It's called Mudd's Women Mudd's women Mudd's women Yeah I'll explain why in a second

So they're going to flying along and there's a spaceship beside them and the spaceship's damaged. So they beam on and they're like sending an SOS. Okay, yeah. And the Enterprise picks them up. It's a guy called Harry Mudd

and he's got these women with him and he's basically a space pimp. Nice. Yeah. Yo, bitch, you best be making that good money for me now, you heard. Yeah, what he says is he's bringing women over to wife them.

Right, okay. So there's a planet of these lonely men. Right. It's kind of a Western planet. just sit around eating beans. They must have reused a set for like Bonanza or something. You know. Place and sables.

Yeah, whatever, okay? So they're bringing these women over to marry him. And, like, Kirk is like, is this consensual? He wouldn't say consensual about then. Like, are the women okay with this? Like, of course they are. Yes, they are. Motherfucker, don't you be worrying about what a bitch got to say.

She do what the fuck she told. Now you got money, you can bust the dirt, motherfucker. Spock Williams. Yeah, Spock Williams. There we go. Yeah. So, like, he's bringing them over. And now, the twist, all the guys on the ship, apart from Spock now, are transfixed by these women.

Right. Like, they're almost like sirens in a way. It's like, so, like, Scotty, be like, blah, blah, blah. Scotty, what seems to be the problem? I'm coming in my pants, sir. Aye, well, that one should show me our muff or something. I don't even need to touch it. Just show me our muff and whack myself off, love three.

My money's as good as anyone, Jeff cut you. I heard about a guy actually who he kind of like semi-hooked up with a girl in a bar, but what they did is they went back to her place, and she was on one side of room and she fingered herself, and he jerked off on the other side. Wow. Yeah. That's pretty, why did they need to go back to her place to do that?

He's got to done that in the Jacks, you know? What? Yeah. There's no space in the Jacks. Oh, you mean she's in the woman's bathroom fingering herself, and he's outside the bins jerking off? Why not? Wait, you know this guy?

No, I don't know. He's called Rich Voss. Oh, okay. My friend, Rich Voss. Right, I see. I see, yeah. Yeah, that's weird, though, isn't it? Kind of to jack off and up,

but can't even be touching each other while they're doing it? Why, was she, like, married or something? I don't think that would really matter. If I found out my wife was like, oh, it didn't touch each other. Oh, yeah, true. If I found out, actually, be honest me, if I found out my wife for showing her pussy the Rich Foss

I'd be like, that's pretty cool. Do you have an Opie's phone number? Because I feel like me and him would be best buds. The Opie and Brian show. Opie's doing very well now. He's really not, though.

He's cracking 100 views. Really? If you combine all the videos for the week. I see. Okay, right. He's going after Jim Norton there. He's got a guy, I think he's called Eddie the waiter. He's like a waiter. And he's like,

the co-host. He's just recording in a restaurant. It's like, yeah, more bread rolls, sir. Anyway, what else are we talking about here? Are you John to Star Trek? No, never.

Real quick, all right. It turns out the women actually are being taking these pills. So the space pimps give them these pills, okay, that makes them irresistible to men. I see. But then at the end,

the women discovered that if you don't take the pills, they're still women, so men still want to fuck them. Ah, okay. don't need the pills. It's just a Mudd's playing mind games. Right. Icebird slim style. I see. Right, right. There were

sugar pills, you know? Well, I think there were placebo. Pacebils. Yeah. So the lesson there, if you're a hot woman, people still want to fuck you, even if you're not taking magic pills. Are you listening to that? All the sexy ladies who listen to this show? No, actually, no, don't listen to that. Take my pills, girls. I'm

Brian Mud. I like it. Hey, it's B-Mud here. You know how it goes down. So that's Star Trek. Real quick, we just talk about Marvel Minute, okay? I'm very excited, guys. So there's a lad on Reddit who's been following Elizabeth Olson around.

Good. Because he's a journalist. Oh, is he? Like Woodard and Bernstein. Right. So he's following her on a plane, and he says... Hopefully there's no deep throat action. Don't touch her. She's a queen. She's an angel. Well, she's flying apparently to London. She got her tinnies out in the old boy, remit.

Yeah. Daddy life. Yeah. Okay. Good. So it's a reference of the film. Yes. I got it. Spike Lee joint.

They're called films. Why is Spike le joint? What the fuck's he talking about? That's... A spike... A giant something you smoke. It's not a film. That's the cut catch out the honkies like you.

We're like, Actually, Mr. Lee, if I could be so bold. What are they bullying the Italian-American man? So, Marvel Minute real quick. Elizabeth Olson's flying to London. They're shooting the Avengers movie in Pinewood. And the rumor is, and guys, turn off now if you want it, spoilers.

Because I've got a lot of sources. I've been hearing some things about the new Avengers movies. One thing I've heard is that Doom, Dr. Doom, is going to have four witches that work for him. Okay. Do you want to know the identity four witches? Yes, you do. I couldn't give less of a fuck.

To me on a fuck. All right. So Scarlet Witch, we won the witches. So that explanatory. What? Scarlet Witch would be won the witches. Okay. Okay.

Agatha Hartness would be another witch. I don't know what any... Debt would be another witch. Debt is Aubrey Plaza. And finally, Charlie's Toron is going to play Clea, the sorceress supreme. Who were the first two being played by? If I have to repeat myself, I'm going to go insane, all right? Just tell you.

Albert I ain't saying something with a tier relativity You wouldn't be like Well what Repeat that I'm pretty sure Somebody would have maybe said Hey could you run that back

For me there Albert Al Moby Put your tongue back in Would you Look like spastic Oh yeah So that's

I've forgotten now Oh yeah Scarlet Witch That's Elizabeth Olson Okay And Agatha Hartness That's a Something Hahn

Oh Catherine Hahn Yeah Right okay Okay Then Charlize Thoreau and Arbery Plaza Yeah And now, I tell you what.

Why does he have four witches? What do they do for them? Because they're the most powerful witches. Fucking nagging at him. No, nothing is sexism, all right? Oh, okay. This is Doomsday here?

Right. Now, I've heard rumors about the opening of Doomsday. Do you want to hear it? And you can go back years from now. So, like, you know, in the year 2050, go back and be like, oh, Brian was right. When they're listening to this in the history archives, you know.

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And they're like, why do we keep this? And so, The rumor is going to start off, okay. Deadpool and Wolverine. That's right. I know you're like, whoa, whoa, slow down.

Deadpool Wolverine will jump from one portal into a universe, and that universe would be the Toby McGuire Spider-Man universe. Oh. Yeah. And it's taking place during an incursion, all right? And the incursions, it's a thing where different universe, you know what it's those parallel universes? Sure.

They're all bumping against each other. Right, bumping mics. They're bumping against each other. I'm going to power through this, all right? Okay. And when they bump into each other, they destroy each other. Ah. So the only way to save your universe is destroyed the other universe before it bumps into yours.

Okay. Yeah. And then Magneto will be there and the whole universe will blow up. Huh. And now, you're thinking like, what's going to happen next? What's going to happen next is the Avengers are going to meet the X-Men. They're going to fight, okay? And then the Fantastic Four are going to show up and they're going to fight.

And then the Thunderbolt is going to show up and they're going to fight. And then all the other people are going to... from Wakanda, okay, from Black Panther, they're going to fight as well, and then Dr.

Doom's going to show up and they're going to fight, and then the whole universe is going to explode. That's to be continued. How? It all exploded. They're all dead.

No, because Dr. Doom, with the power of the witches and maybe the infinity stones, and maybe a little help from Molecule Man, if they include him in there, and maybe Franklin Richards as well, he's going to create his own,

universe in his image. Okay, and that's the second film. Secret Wars is going to be set in Doom's world. Okay. Yeah. 30 years old, Brian, you're a 30 year old man. Yeah. Yeah. A life well lived.

I honestly, I'd be so excited this movie. I've been, like, I've been fantasizing about like, you know. It's like a, you know, the shortest story ever. Marvel comic never read. Yeah. There we go. It's a bit of a highbrow reference there, you know. I have a little fantasy where I watch these Marvel movies And I'm like, God, that was great

And you come behind me to shoot me in the head, you know Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha He died with a smile in his face Oh, Jesus gross I'm so excited reason now I've been like lying a bit It's like, yeah man, it's just commercial lie Yeah

The death of cinema Oh, I can't wait, you know Right You'll have made 50 million already Oh On pre-sales Pre-sails? Yeah, 50 million Against

the what, $200 million budget? Far from it. I think it's going because they're filming these back to back basically with little breaks in there. So I think it's going to be 2 billion. How many? Two billion. Yeah. How many movies? I know a bargain, isn't it?

How many are they making? It's going to be two Avengers movies that are shooting back to back with little breaks in there. Right. And I think they're going to be about three hours each or so. And that's going to cost 2 billion. To Billy.

Man, you got to pay for all these people. Tobin McGuire, Kelsey Grammer. He's not coming cheap. I bet he probably is these days, you know. He says Trump is the best president of history. Yeah. I'm always surprised by how right-wing Kelsey Grammar is. I always think it's funny, like, you know what, like, Frasier.

Yeah. A very, I wouldn't call it like a crazy show. It's very kind of like, you know, intelligent. It's like word playing stuff. Yeah. I find you listen, the behind the scenes. He's like doing pills and coke. and drinking and banging like, I think a 16-year-old

babysitter and all that. And then he, like, shows up on stage, you know, wipes his face like, oh, Niles. The Chardonnay, you fool. And, you know, cut. Give me no bump of coke there, will you? I still got teen pussy juice on over my dick.

Smell my finger, Eddie. He always likes my sloppy seconds. Hey, bitch, where are you going? Wipe those tears away, get back here. Yeah. Time to go to the dog pound, baby. It's disgusting, and this is your hero, is it? This is you idolized.

Marvel, you know, I never actually watched Frasier? Well, you got 11 seasons to watch, and it's all an ORT player. I'm only going to watch the reboot with Nicholas Lindhurst. That's the only one I care about, you know? Not terrible, it's overly complicated. Okay. There's too much stuff going on. He's got, like, a son who's got a kid, but it's not his kids,

it's a friend's kid who died, and there's a girl there, and Frazier has bought an entire. building the sun lives in so he's like it's the whole thing going on and he's sober now

is he in real life yeah yeah oh well that's that's why it's not good you need to get back on the coke that's he didn't have that magic

the coke the pills and the teen pussy that's how you make a sitcom you know what I opened this shinch diamond memorial oh you opened it

I opened yeah Bank of Ireland oh we get all his information now yeah this looks pretty boring now so there's a guy used to

live here yeah What's his name, Abu Graham? Don't hold, don't read it out. Abu Dhabi. We already read it out. Oh, yeah, we did, yeah. It looks boring.

There's no private information. I don't have, like, you know, like, dick pics. Yeah, exactly, yeah. My dearest love is my fucking cock. All right, well, you're good. You've done that now. Are you happy?

You're proud of yourself. I'm a bad boy. Speak to the bad boys real quick. That is highly illegal, what you just did, by the way. You believe a fuck. Whoa. But I'll be honest If the police do come

I will throw in their bus straight with Your officer He made me do it He ended the pot It's deep fake Officer If you'll check my medical history

I am a dyslexic So why would I be opening the mail? It was James Cadden He did he opened the letter And he was touching girls In the bus as well I saw And then I just go

I've been rumble Undercover let's go go Go go go I've been undercover this whole time I'm like Serpico you know Huh? Who was your girl? You're all against me, huh?

A bunch of dirty caps! Huh? Before we go, Oh, but I'm actually just a schizophrenic who's imagined all of it. You have a... Huh?

Dirty caps, you're all at to me, huh? You have a picture of me, you leave outside City Hall. How far is this go? All the way to the top. I'm taking you all down. I'm cigarette.

Rotten to the car. We're supposed to be caps. Wait, before we talk about Jake, I'm going to talk about Jake Lang in a minute. Okay. I didn't mention, remember I said he went to Steam Rally? Oh, yeah.

Yeah, so it's weird. So it's literally, so it's Steam Engines. Okay. A convention for Steam Engines in Carlo. That is quite a microcosm of undiagnosed autism. Apparently it's like one of the most popular events, uh, connect to steam engines in Carlo. Well, unless you are able to provide paperwork to confirm that.

You're on your tall tails, Brian. Trying to big dick me. are you? Yeah, make me feel bad. So, it's steam, obviously, steam engines there at the steam engine rally. And remember in the past, used to be more stuff there,

maybe it's like the recession or ever capable. So you get there and like, there's steam engines and they're selling like, you know, some boots. And they've got like, what are you calling? Like a team park, kind of like a little ride thing

you get into it, it spins you around. Right, right. Basically you get in it and it goes up and down, up and down. Right. What weird is, it's painted. One, one size of, painting of Eminem.

Okay. Yeah. And the other side is just a painting of like a Latin couple dancing. Oh. I was like, what's the connection here? Yeah. And there's also another section where you can watch

is like little kids bring their animals and they go around in circles and guys watch them. You can pick the best one. The best animal. Oh, best animal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'll take two of them. Yeah. Throw in that spastic one for free. Well, no. I'm just here for the steam edge.

Get in the van. Are you excited about Doomsday? You're not going to live to say it, sweetheart. Get in the van. An incursion. So, but then also they were selling stuff. Right. And it was like a real funny just kind of random little collection of stuff.

So it's like, oh, we sell some boots and pen, you know, a knife and whatever. But one guy was selling like cookie jars. But one was a cookie jar of like a black and white minstrel kind of like. Like a gollywag kind of cookie jar? Oh my God. Yeah. Jimmy O'Toole's like, That one, I'll pay top dollar for that.

Was it your dad brought you to this? Yeah. Yeah, it's a family thing. Father's son bonding. Yeah. Is your mother there? She's not allowed. Good.

Couldn't handle the steam. Yeah, yeah. Actually, a section was like a contest thing where they make the women ride the steam engines and you can drive it the best. Ah. Yeah, and they all laugh at them. Yeah.

Look, yeah, fucking stupid, cunt you. Even if she can drive it really well Like fucking stupid It's on a track But she still has to stop and ask for directions Yeah That's like a Rodney Dangerfield joke there That's pretty good

Oh my wife You know, he's done the steam engine It's on a track She's still asking for directions You know, oh Hey What? I'm trying here

If I don't like Piss myself laughing Yeah What's wrong with you Exactly yeah Yeah I should have got that cookie jar Be the co-host

But see, there was like a minstrel show Goliwold cookie jar. Yeah. How much was it? I think like a tenor. But he also had a cookie jar of Trump as well. Oh. So I was like, oh, that's pretty recent. Now were they in a set?

No. Two for 15. And it was like a weird little collection of things. You know, there's a few like wrestling posters there as well. Right. But like all like, like, like what you'd like, you know. There's no like wrestling posts from today. Yeah.

It was all the, what you call the classic era, you know? The attitude era. Yeah. So it's all like, what's he called, John 316? Do you mean Stone Cold Steve Austin? Yes, yeah. So it's like Stone Cold Steve Austin and the Goliwog. If you want to drink some beer and have some Goliwag cookie jars,

give me a hell, yeah. Oh my God. J.R., it's Stokel, Steve Austin. He just had Vince McMahon with the Goliwawl cookie jar. where I didn't think I'd ever live to see a king with my God, he's killed him. That is the greatest collie war cookies I ever seen to my life.

And they weren't selling food. Normally these things, they sell a bit, you know, like hot dogs or like, you know, a shitty burger. Yeah, a shitty burger that costs you 15 euros. Yeah, yeah, you eat it with pride. Yeah, helping out the community. And then you've got diarrhea for three days afterwards.

It's got a dog collar in it. A finger. I was looking for, like, food or anything. And there was like a tent. They said, like, refreshments. They went in, okay? they've got this like shitty sandwiches just out with flies on them okay

oh nice and if you I didn't buy one if you asked so it's a woman there like what do you want you and you like you buy a sandwich it's like okay he just goes over and just picked up the sandwich and I was like there you go

coughs on it yeah I was just checking the cow's arse there before so it's a bit smelly yeah if you want them flies that'll be extra and I want to get a coffee oh

they're probably all looked up Metropolitan Elite They looked at you like you were. Oh, like a non-binary juggler on a unicycle, just like, wow, a coffee. I'm here to get a coffee and I'm going to vote for people for a profit. I'm making a documentary about the occupation of Apollo House. Oh, the elites don't care for it. Can I buy some pronouns here?

I asked for coffee, just like, all right, okay, so I gave the money for it. What is that? Just two tea bags in a cup? There you go. There's no espresso out there or so I need. Yeah, so it's like...

Two tea bags and a lump of ice cream. There you go. It's three quid for a coffee. Machiaato job. So I was like, oh, there you go. Give her to coin. She's like, all right, yeah. Uh, it just goes like, like, coffee.

Like that. There's a woman there. They're going like, all right, yeah. And then she's kind of like, you know, just like... Doesn't like, it's not like... It's not like chop, you got nothing else to do, you know?

Yeah. Yeah, she's like looking at fucking her feet. Right. She's like staring at a wall, you know, and then like, and eventually she gets it, you know, but it's just like, doesn't even fill it all the way. It gives me no milk or anything. Oh, for fuck, so.

Didn't even spit in it. Yeah. That's what I want you. That's a shame. And I told you, Richie Cabinner was there. Yes. And they're playing his, so there's a boom box by the car, and they're playing his stuff.

In fucker go, fucker three, fuck a lella. He does some sketches between it. Is that right? There's one, I listen to one sketch, and it's like, uh, hello there. Is this two, two, two, two, two, two. No, this is double two, double two. Sorry about that there for waking you up.

Ashrose, I was up anyway to answer the phone. A two, fuckaloo, vacu, lacaloo. Is this two, two, two, two, two, two. No, this is Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew, Jew. Oh, will I disagree with the genocidal regime? The Holocaust of Palestinians. Oh, the rivers of Gaza run red with. It was Richie Kavana and Norman Finkelstein.

I've never happened to me here. He'll sit some daughter. Hey, just look in your fucking head on you, you big bullet shit. Real quick, all right, so Jake Lang, so I mentioned this. He was in the news. It's kind of like Marvel Minute, actually.

So Jake Lang, he's this guy who, by the way, he's Jewish. His mother's Jewish. All right. And this is something they beat him with because he's a fervent, is that the word? He's an extreme anti-Semone. and he's always like,

oh, no, I'm not actually Jewish, no, he burns a lot of like, is it the Tolman? Oh, the Talmud. Yeah, whatever it is, okay, yeah. The Quran, we're the Jewish book, okay, yeah. Woody Allen's without fetters. He burns a Blu-ray of what's up pussycat or whatever that's called.

Yeah, so he's a very big anti-Semite. He's a January 6th or as well. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. But a lot of the other anti-Semites don't, accept them. Because he's Jewish. Yeah.

And anti-Semites, that's kind of their big bugaboo. Maybe stickler for that. Yeah, it's like, you know, we like you. We like your vibe. It's just the one thing there. Also, before he,

funny, before he was like a Nazi. He was like a nightclub promoter. And basically like a sexy woman social media poster. Okay. So they'd be like, take some pictures to me and post them. And if someone like, you know,

comments like, you're so hot, babe. It'd be like, oh, cheers. thanks Yeah Yeah And I'm not Jewish By the way

Ah yes Yeah And then He popped up A news there Because some guy Dressed up A spider man

Punch him in the face Oh right Yeah Yeah And then he's the real villain In Minnesota Yeah He was out there

He was out there Defending Chud The Builder Oh The guy who shot Somebody No I think he said The N-word

and shot someone Okay Well Yeah He still shot Someone though I don't I don't

He's all This stuff anymore I think I better off for it you're the one who brought it up. Oh, well. This is your topic of conversation.

And halfway through, it was like, yeah, I don't actually follow this. And I think you're an idiot for following it. I didn't know what I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I saw that the Spider-Man guy, he jumped in the back of the truck, started beating the shit out of him, you know?

It was pretty cool. Yeah, well, yeah, actually it was, yeah. I mean, I'm gonna, this is a preliminary Jake Lang update. I'm gonna go deeper into Jake Lang. Okay. I'm gonna make Louis Thruh and I have to meet him and hang out with him for a minute.

Are you going to, maybe if you love, you fall in love with Jake Lang's ideology so much that you disavow Spider-Man? Never. Could that happen? I'm burning an issue with Spider-Man. That happens to be shoot me in the head. Yeah, yeah. Shoot me in the head, true believers. What was going to talk about? We're at the hour there.

Oh, quick, some of them actually bummed me out generally, but actually made me laugh as well, you know, because I'm sick and twisting me. All right. It's a guy called Ed Brew Baker. He's a writer. Okay. I've been a fan of his for good while. He writes,

well, he's written a lot of stuff. Probably his most famous things he wrote like some Captain America stuff. Right. The Winter Soldier, the Captain American movie. Oh, yeah. He's involved in that.

Right. But he also writes crime stuff as well, not just comic book nonsense, all right. He did a series called Criminal, which I really enjoy. And that's a thing where it's kind of a little bit like Pulp Fiction,

whereas these small stories set in the city and they're all kind of semi-connected. Okay. So it's like, and they're all kind of like, you know, so want to be about, a guy who was trained by an old man next story would be set in the 70s

about the old man next story about the old man's brother right right you know all that so they're all kind of higgily-piggily round time but all set in the same city and it got opted to be an Amazon show okay oh this is cool yeah and the cast

I was like you know so it's like Richard Jenkins he's good Charlie Hunnam Amelia Clark I was like she plays like a slowly heroin addict I'm like, yeah, yeah. And some other names there as well. Yeah, yeah, we'll see with this.

So they shot it in 24. Okay. And it hasn't come out yet. Oh. And people are like, oh, it's a bit strange, you know, what's going on there? And they just popped out there that there's a guy involved in production is suing Ed Brubaker now. Oh. Because I think he's like Vietnamese.

And Ed Brub Baker, I think, was saying lots of racial things and was touching him. I think he waved a gun in his face. Oh. and stuff like that. Yeah. I would say he probably has legitimate concerns there. Yeah, always silent the Vietnamese, aren't you?

So that was actually something really, I was like, oh, another guy I like. And you know me, I don't care if you harass anyone because I'm so fuck, I don't give a fuck, you know? That's true. But I want to see my TV show. I want to see Charlie Hunnam. It'll probably still come out.

I'll probably be shy, let's go on. It probably will be shy, to be honest, because Charlie Hunnam is a bad actor. Amelia Clark's not great. either. Shut your mouth. What? I think she's delightful. In what? Apart from Game of Thrones. The movie where she's dating a guy in a wheelchair?

What, what is that? I don't know. Okay. You brought her. I don't know. I don't know. I love her. All right. Well, Richard Jenkins is good. We can agree on that. I'd fuck him, yeah. Yeah, yeah. The real mother of dragons.

Look, it's getting dark, guys. I think I've done everything on my list here. Uh, real, you know, the stuff about Fetterman. but it's the usual stuff, you know. He's still depressed and his son's getting more attention to him. Oh, what? Remember that? I told you that. What's his son do?

Oh, he was at a birthday party with his son, and he was getting too much attention, and he got depressed and drove off and wanted to kill himself. Legend. Yeah, that'll show him. Well, he was singing happy birthday to him. Little cunt. Well, it came out there.

He came out of my fucking, he came out of my jizz bag here, my cock and balls. and he's getting all the praise. He wouldn't be nothing. If it was up to me, he'd just be another staying in my sock. But here he is. We all have to sing happy birthday

and clap along like fucking seals. They are all the reason Trump won. Do you know that? Well, all this staffers, people that work for him, this week came out and they're like, he's terrible. He's awful to work with and he's lazy as fuck. And of all these texts, this is pretty damning all these texts being like, oh, there's a funeral here

for like veterans or like these police officers. office got shot him with a funeral. He's like, boring. Ah. Oh, it'll be three hours. Like, I don't want to go for three hours. Right. Well, about 10 minutes. Nah. And he's like, can I wear my shorts? No, you can't have wear... It's okay. They're black, so it's fine, you know?

He's got jorts on and a fucking wallet chain, you know? Jesus Christ. He is such a fucking goober, man. Yeah. Also, isn't he like his brain is mush at this point? Well, he had a few strokes, I think. Yeah, well, I'm just... That probably will have...

Apparently he still seems to be run for... He can become the president. That's not going to happen ever. Not in a million years. You're one than naysayers. I am. I'll go on record with that right now. I don't think Fetterman has a hope in hell.

Snowballs chance in hell. Yeah, yeah. Well, that's the idea. I've got nothing else. Okay. I think we're well there. I'm a little bit tired now. You know what is?

I ate a big salad before we started recording. It was a very big salad. It was too big, wasn't it? Oh my God, I'm wild. Guzzled the whole thing. What was all that creamy jizz you were putting on it? That's not for you to know. Caesar salad dressing.

Is that it? Actually, it was, yeah. I thought you were going to make a gay joke there. I probably could. No, no, you'll have to. Caesar was the name of the guy who spoked in your salad. Got him. Got his age.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter of this, because we could be recording a library next. or there's a podcast studio I've been looking into. Have you? Yeah, I've been talking to him actually. Really? In Monaghan, yeah.

To be honest with you, I lied a little bit because I kind of put on this kind of like... We have a hundred million dollar deal with Spotify. What can you offer us? Make you a sandwich that don't have flies on them?

Do you have a simeon that girls can sit on and squirt in my face? And you've got a big black woman called Robin. We have our own beetle juice. and our own Gary the retard. But we need somewhere to store them overnight. So I was trying to do them there, but I kind of said like,

oh yeah, I'm taking me and my friend are taking a start on a podcast. It's about like, you know, films and, you know, nerdy stuff really. I'm not too sure. I wasn't like, hey, babe, it's Brian and James here. Yeah. Lock up your daughters. I can hear you're wet on the phone.

It's a man. Take your tini's out for me right now. It's an old man. I'm like, oh, what's that? Who is this now? Is this the ESB? Because my kettle's broke. Yeah, take your teeth out, Grandpa, suck it.

So what did they say then? Were they like... Oh, lovely, yeah. Yeah, it's lovely. They were very nice. And they were like, oh, yeah, just thinking about, like, getting some space and all that.

What's the... What's the... What's the claw wedge? What's the Vig? Yeah. What's the Vig on this action? I already forgot what the Vig is now. Actually, who's it?

someone used Vig recently a normal person. I think one of the lads is a building site used Vig. No, that's not what he said. Oh, yeah. You know what he said. He's like, there's too many Vigs. Oh, come on now. Come on.

You said it, man. I mean, those are your words. Forgive me now. I think it's like, I don't know, like 40 quid or something, you know. An hour? I think like that, yeah. That's pretty good. Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I was looking at other place and it was like, you know, 600 per minute. Yeah. And we don't give you chairs and there's no running water or electricity.

And you have to fight the hobos and they're the stabby type of hobos, you know. So you better be quick with it. You better get hit

to the skip. Well look, that's the end of the episode there, guys. Next week we'll have more Star Trek and yeah,

that's it. I can't wait.