Brian and James Fuck Each Other - Weapons

Episode Date: October 3, 2025

Benedict Wong 4eva

Okay, here we go I'm talking, yeah It's just me by myself I like this Oh, Brian's Brian's ran away He's scared Yeah

I like this stuff Welcome to the James Cadden show No, no stop Security's taking me away No, it's Brian and James You fucked me You fuck

You fuck So, I'm coming for everything. I actually watch, it's very similar to Black Rabbit. Have you seen Black Rabbit? No. It's the new Netflix miniseries, all right? One and Dunn story.

I'm liking it so far. That's about these two guys, Jason Bateman, Jude Law. You'd probably be Jude Law. You're fucking idiot. You think? I don't think so. So, no, it's about these two brothers, all right. But the Bateman character is like an addict. Okay.

drugs and gambling. So he fucks up his life and they own a kind of cool club called a black rabbit. Ah. And it's like the name of the show. Yeah, exactly. Probably a coincidence. Oh yeah, it's complete coincidence. Like they were making it at the end. They're like, oh wait, oh fuck. How do you believe it?

Well, that's worked out pretty well. So they fuck over Jason Bateman his head. They're like, we're going to buy you out. Right. All right. Because you're just too much trouble with the drugs and the gambling. Yeah, you're a mental weakling. Yeah, you can't be trusted, all right? And that's what you're doing.

Okay. You're fucking me over. You're going to buy me out a podcast. Yes. You're going to give me six millions so I'll walk away. I'll give you five pot noodles and

one of those free DVDs that you get in the newspaper. The Daily Mail, yeah? The best of Ronnie Corburt. I'm like, deal, done. I go down and try sell it for crack.

Come on, baby. I'm Johnson. It's a steel, baby Black Rabbit I'm really enjoying this So like I said, it starts off Jason Bateman has been on the run basically Because he owes these Greeks 140 EGs

Yeah And it's a deaf Greek A deaf Greek Yeah Wow So he's doing sign language He's like You fucking pointing his dick

I think he's angry Does that mean I love you in deaf Greek. Do you want me to suck your cock? I mean, yeah, you're stuck his cock because he's deaf, he can't stop you.

Yeah. I think that's how it works. Yeah, yeah. He doesn't even know what consent sounds like. So, so the Greeks are after Jason Bateman,

and they take his finger. Which one? Pinky. Oh. Yeah, that was a war. And you love that pinky, don't you? Yeah, yeah.

Imagine no pinky. No pinky. cut off an elevator so now he's like, hey brother, I'm back we got to get some money together and he thinks Jude Law his brother is cock at a walk and has everything sorted? Right.

Far from it, my friend. What? Yeah, he's... Well, he's got both his pinky so he's already winning. And he's always using it, you know? Yeah. Acting like the fucking, you know, king of the pinkies. Pinky in the brain over here, you know? Putting his pinky and his

woman's stinky. Am I right? Yeah, just rubbing it in my face. Well, no, he doesn't have a woman. He doesn't. That's the problem. So he's actually in love with his friend's girl. Okay, his friend's called Wes. Wes.

Wes has invested... I wish I had Wessie's girl. Yeah, that's good. That's a bit of fun there. You know, it's actually... No hate speech, no slurs. I'm trying a new thing. No, it actually works out because Wes is a very successful music producer.

He's also, I believe, a singer And he's doing well for himself We first see him He's excited because he might be doing a voice In a new Pixar movie So that's what we're talking about here, you know? So he's like way up here Yeah

Jude Law wants to steal his girl And Jude Law is in a lot of debt Oh, fuck And he also wants to expand Huh You know when you're in debt What you need to do? Franchise Spend money to make money

Exactly So he wants to buy Just kind of There's a cool place In downtown New York All right He wants to buy that If he buys that

Turns it into Black Rabbit You know Two Yeah Then it's money That's like Printing money then All my problems are solved

Okay And also he's stressed out Because there's a New York Times food critic coming Oh Yeah A snobby woman All right

Yeah And his best Bartender The Night of the Food critic cancels. She's like, I can't come in. He's like, what do you mean? We need you. No, I'm sick. Well, you're fucking fired. Oh. So he's stressed out about this, all right? Here's the thing. Why did she quit? Lazy? No, no, that's it. Deadbeat? No, you think that, right? That's Gen Z for you, typical. Turns out she was raped.

Yeah, how's that different to what I said? Okay, sorry. I've gone too far, haven't I? No, not far enough. Was it the Greek? No, no. It was this guy called Julius who works there as well.

Oh shit, okay. Yeah, yeah. So Julius has roofied her, all right? Damn. And it turns out Julius is a history of this, you know? Not Rufian now, but of like, you know, like, hey, I just wanted to touch her panties while she's wearing them.

What's wrong with that? I'm Julius. I'm wacky It's like animal house But Low way, low way So There's a lot of stuff going on

That's my point Yeah All right, yeah And also Jason Bateman He's got a daughter That doesn't want to talk to him Okay Yeah, she's like, you didn't talk to me

For years, Dad Yeah She's a tattoo artist Oh, Jesus So she's like that, you know With the hair Picture a woman tattoo artist after you cleaned up the vomit

yeah right oh this is by the way this is going to have to be the free one oh this is the free one yeah can go and spoil a lot of stuff in it okay yeah sorry guys all right yeah so you want me to cut out anything

no no I stand by everything I said lock I mean well look what happens nothing nothing ever happens you'll probably be dead tonight probably because James is driving out into the storm James is so badass Is it a red warning all right

Red status warning It's like do not go out No one can handle this You're like fuck it Only if you have a big penis And you get on your hog You're smoking You're on a motorbike smoke

To a cigar in your helmet It's full of smoke This is This is very dangerous But boy I just love these stogies Hey some dumb traffic cop tries to pull me over

and she's like hey what are you doing and say hey bitch why don't you suck on my picker and she'd probably love it you try and blow smoke at her but you got the helmet I just start puking out the helmet

like the visors just spewing vomit because it's dangerous weather but you've got a gig and is it Arma Antrum it's like two hours and you're gonna be driving back late as well yeah yeah well I mean fair fucks yeah

I mean that deserves a fair fucks I wouldn't do it I'm a little coward I'm like oh the wind I kind of already sort of text like oh it's pretty bad weather is there any flooding and they're like no it's fine oh okay the weather seems pretty good to me

only a real bitch would be scared of wind oh not me it's invisible Paul, you're scared of something you can't even see. It's like depression doesn't exist. So, you know, Fairfaxed you. I hope you come back. Me too. If not, I'll sell

this episode as like, you know, like the almost like, yeah, you know like this snuff film? Yeah. It's kind of like that, you know? Yeah, it's like the final moments of James Caden. And what was his message to everyone from beyond the grave?

But anyway. Black rabbit. Okay, yeah. So there's all this stuff going on. Oh, I didn't mention, because Jude Law is so stressed out about this, okay? He doesn't want the bad PR of, you know, one of your workers raping people. Sure. Okay, so he has footage.

Food critic won't like that at all. Yeah, the food critic's like, this roofies terrible. Underwhelming, odd inspired. I was barely sleepy. her and Greg Wallace So what he does is He has actual CCTV footage of

Jewels, the guy putting a roofie in a drink Oh my God And he deletes it Really? Yeah, he's like, I don't need this PR Jesus That's fucked up

So you're rooting for Jude Law here Obviously the hero And does he even like Have a word with Julius I care Maybe knock that off He's just like You're not gonna post anything online about this are you? No, good

good. You probably don't want to press charges do you? Nah, you wouldn't like that because, you know, people are saying you're slut and a whore and a bitch and they might be right. I'm not the judge. You can't cook for shit. Oh wait, she's a bartender, sorry. Well, let's still see.

So, we got that going on and we got some other stuff. Also, we did the classic thing with these shows where the first scene is there's a guy with a gun in the black rabbit and the gun goes off

and someone's shot and then it's one month earlier. Oh, great. So now we're... Always love that. Yeah, so now we're waiting to see what happens there. Oh, and also, the last thing I watch before you came down and ruined it, alright, is... What I tend to do?

Yeah, one, the henchmen. Brian, I'm sick. Where's my medicine? Be quiet. It's Jason Bateman, for Christ's sake. Show some respect. So, oh, I didn't mention... Oh, it's real quick. with the stupidest thing in a minute, the one thing I don't like.

But another bit of drama, okay, so one, the henchmen who cut off Jason Bateman's finger. Yeah. He's casing the tattoo joint, all right? He's like, find Jason Bateman's daughter. Oh, yeah. You know, they're kind of like, you know, I know where she works.

But guess what? He falls in love with her. Oh, that is stupid. Yeah, so now he's in love with the man whose finger he cut off. A classic love triangle you know who the route for the area does she reciprocate

the feelings oh yeah she's in love with him oh okay like I can't wait for you to meet my dad awkward or Mr. Bateman don't I know you

from somewhere but here's the stupidest thing all right so the reason why he had to pay out Jason Bateman so he leaves the Black Rabbit all right

is because he got up some kind of drunken incident and a member of staff got hurt. Okay. And that's what we initially hear. Right. We're like, oh, what's going to happen?

I assume, like, it was a drunk driving thing or something. Yeah, yeah. Way worse, all right? So we meet the former employee. He's in a wheelchair. Oh, Jesus. And it turns out they were on the roof, all right? And Jason Bateman was like, I dare you to jump off the roof.

Oh, my God. What? Because I think you can make it to the next building. Right. And the guy's like, yeah, I'll do it. way, if you jump with me, so they're running to the ledge, okay, and the guy Trevor's his name, he jumps off,

turns around, Jason Bateman's still on the roof. Yeah, waving to him. I'm sorry, doing the Larry David, like, I'm sorry, you know? And he's like, oh, no! That's very stupid. So now he's in a wheelchair being like, yeah, and it was all your

fault, Jason Bateman, I'm in this wheelchair. You tricked me to jumping by saying jump. And I, I, I, I, I, Like the Pied Piper, I couldn't resist. And now, you owe me a jump. He literally says that. In front of everyone, he's like, yeah, you know what, Jason Baitman?

You owe me a jump. Jump now. And Jason Bainterman is like, no. He's like, ah. See that? Yeah. Your common sense was in a wheelchair long before you met me, pal. All right?

Won't be a fucking goofball all your life. Like, honestly, like, if you, if that happened, like, you have yourself to blame. Yeah, 100% Yeah, I'm not I suppose it's meant to be like Oh, could you live with the guilt? Yeah, easily He's a fucking doofus

I can't live without my pinky Who's the real victim? Yeah, so that's the real stupid part Yeah Apart from that though I'm liking the show For what it is It's just good to like watch something About people whose lives are shit

You know and you're sitting there You know, drinking your like moo-jube Like God, look at that I've got it made Mujoo, eh? Yeah, exactly. Well, you know, you know, you make all those comments about the Jewish people, so I got...

I have to support them with strawberry milk. Milk and honey. Oh, is that a... That's what they call Israel. Oh, the land of milk and honey. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why there's Israeli whiskey

called milk and honey whiskey. Yeah, because it tastes like milk and honey. Does it actually, though? No, it's just a lie, you know? Just like everything. Israel puts out. It's bullshit. You know they find fake they plant fake skeletons.

Who? What they do is these Jewish archaeologists, all right? They'll find like a fake skeleton and it's got a book, all right? And it's like, according to this book here, Jews actually own this whole land.

Oh, there you go. Yeah. I have heard of this. Yeah, yeah. And if they find like a Palestinian skeleton, all right, they'll like smash it up, you know? Not in the sea here, folks. somebody left a dog skeleton here don't worry we'll get rid of it oh actually talking of the middle east and all that did you see uh john oliver did an episode about benjamin net yahoo oh here we go yeah go on liberal propaganda kick a man when he's down he's got enough problems the nilk boys podcast didn't go over like he would hope but they showed an amazing

clip I've never seen before. Have you seen the babysitter clip? No. So there's an ad when Benjamin Netanyahu was running for office some stage, okay? Yeah. There's this political ad and this Israeli couple. Like, who's going to mind the baby? You got to go

to work. I got to go to my meeting. What's going to happen? Knock, knock. Who is it? Hey, hello, it's me. Benjamin Netanyahu. You wanted a... It's almost like, you know, Benjamin Netanyahu in a factory in Wigham. I hear you needed a baby sitter. How about a babysitter? Does your little child like loboos? I have, we have labubos with yarmacos called Lejujuice.

Here we go. Come on, that's a bit of fun there, right? You can't get angry with that. I can't get angry with that at all. I think Benjamin would love that. Yeah. You're all pretty cool, James. I like you very much, Mr. Cadden. La Jujo, very funny. I'm surprised they haven't come out with that yet. Yeah, well... Maybe I'll start that. You could pitch that.

Yeah, yeah. We... Picked it, folks. Actually, we watched the thing about advertising there. Oh, yes. And you could pitch it on that, the Jimmy Fallon show. Yeah, what's it called? On brand.

On brand. With Jimmy Fallon. So I know the way you don't get enough Jimmy Fallon in your life. It's my biggest problem. It's like a calcium deficiency, all right? That's why you need those anti-department. presence and all that, all right? It's not enough Jimmy Fallon.

Well, he's got a new show all about advertising. Yeah. And it's funny, it starts off in me like, I'm Jimmy Fallon and I love commercials. They're my favorite thing in the world. I love branding. I love content. I love social media posts. It's all great.

And I talk, how about a TV show all about that? My two favorite things, TV and commercials combined. it's so weird it's such a bizarre thing for him to come out with you know why like Jimmy's

Fallon's a sell out not even that I thought you were like Bill Hicks man but it's like of all the things like you're already doing the tonight show

that's a kind of if you're doing one of those gigs and you're allegedly an alcoholic as well yeah yeah that takes up a lot of your time sure takes up my time

and I don't have the tonight show but like of all the things for him to do like doing like a movie or something is one thing but then just doing this it's weird it's also it's like America's next top model meets the apprentice kind of

isn't it? And it's so like they're not even attempting so it's sponsored by Samsung all right but every episode they have to do a pitch to a big company

all right so that's more advertising then so then Duncan comes along yeah they've changed it by the way it's not Dunkin' Donuts anymore Just Dunkin? Yeah, because they want to focus on the non-donaut stuff.

Like what? They do breakfast, they do milkshakes, do coffees, all sorts of stuff, right? America runs on Duncan. I got bit by the bug there. It's like propaganda. I'm like, I fucking love Duncan. I like the ad they did with Jeremy Strong and the Afflex. Of course, you loved that, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Wonderful pastiche of the method actors process and the commercialization of the craft, you know. A wonderful satire. Well, you're going to hear about way better commercial ideas than that. So they have to pitch to Duncan. And they've got like a real diverse cast, okay, of characters. Real motley crew.

Exactly, yeah. So it's like the big fat guy from Texas. Yeah. There's like the jelly roll. Yeah, everything's bigger in Texas. Woo! There's the big... Except my picker, but I don't care.

There's like the Nancy Grace fat white woman who's like, I'll all there, everybody. Yeah. There's like the cool, uh, biracial girl. There's like the black woman. There's like the white kind of surfer dude. Yeah. Everyone.

The whole cross section. Everyone apart from us. There isn't a white sad podcaster there. No. Yeah, which is a, they're lost. I mean, Jimmy Fallon's probably the closest you get to it, you know? White alcoholic. Yeah.

Smelly probably. Oh, and also his co-host is a woman who's a real boss bitch. yeah she's this black woman all right who used to work she's on a merit I think she's on like some reality show like the wives of Beverly Hills whatever yeah she also used to be working for Uber and she

killed it Uber like she made little taxi drivers commit suicide because she was so good at it right yeah yeah that's good and also she's kind of they call her the N word whisperer right because no no it's not bad alright because if someone it's not you know because if someone says the N word

to get her in so you only like when Papa John said the N-word. Yes. Yeah. I don't know what the context was. I think it was probably bad. You know what's very funny is so it was in like a conference call

with people who were trying to give him media training. Yeah. And he was literally saying, look, I'm not a racist. It's not like I'm going around saying bo-uh. So it's like he said the N-word

to prove that he's not the kind of guy who says the N-word. Yeah, yeah. And it didn't work. No. His 4D chest didn't work, all right? So they have to bring this woman in to save the company. Yeah. So if you say the N-word, you call her.

Okay, I'll keep that out of mind. I'll have her on speed dial just in case. It's like better call, Saul, you know. So it's her and Jimmy, okay? They host a show. And the first big pitch is for Dunkin' Donuts. Now, I'm going to... Don't you mean Duncan? You fucking idiot.

Ball in the first hurdle. Stupid court. And it's funny, because they get Duncan in. Dunker like, hey guys, we need you to... Help us advertise our new $6 breakfast. That's right. I didn't misspeak there. Six dollar breakfast.

You get coffee, breakfast, hash browns, all in there, okay? It's great. Anyway, you got to pitch that. It's going to be pretty hard. It's great. I think that could work. What about is it, Tiger, right?

Dunkin the Tiger. Yeah, no one picked that, right? Now, no pressure, James. Well, I'm going to ask you at the end to pitch your own idea. Right. But I'm going to tell you about some of the pitches. Okay.

So one... I've already got mine. Well, wait to hear these, okay? So one of the women, okay, you know the magic eight ball? Yes. So she, her idea is it's a Duncan magic eight ball. Right. And you shake it and it says, get Duncan.

Get Duncan. Every time. Every time. No matter what. So the kind of thing is you want to make decision. Decision is always Duncan. What about the magic hate ball? And it just says the end word.

it every time. Because you already got the chick there. She'll help us, you know. There we go. You got that real quick. That's like, what's like shark tank? Oh, sharks. Yeah, me and Mark.

Me and the cubes will, uh, we'll, we'll have a good time with that. That's the name Mark Cuban. Mark Cuban, yeah. The cubes, do they call him that? You do. Uh-huh. I sure do. If you create the magic heatball,

you can call anyone anything you want. Especially. Oh, actually, apropos of nothing, all right? I was just reminded there, there was an American senator. I don't know if it was, I forget who it was now, right? But he was in controversy because he lived in a ranch, and the ranch was called Beep Head Ranch. Beephead Ranch?

Yeah. What's the beep? What do you think? The big one? Oh, the big one, yeah. Yeah, it wasn't retard. doesn't even work yeah it's bad

be paid ranch I'm confused don't think about too much now no I won't you to consult your magic hateball but anyways will I say the N word today all signs point to yes

this is fun yeah you're sick and everything you're carrying this always. Well, you carried the last one. I did, yeah. I didn't like that.

No, I didn't like it either. I was getting pretty sick in my voice, you know? I was trying to be all ebert about like one battle after another. Yeah, and it's like good. It's fucking class

because there's big guns going bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. And there's a car, like some kind of chase. Yeah. Like, brr. And then there's a woman there

big tits, class. Oh, Regina Hall's in it. Oh, yeah. Yeah, she's good. She's hot. Yeah. Anyway, back to Duncan

Yeah, Duncan I got distracted The next pitch The next pitch Is I think you saw I'll show you a clip of this The guy's like Hey Duncan

It's like white collar guys Oh yeah About it's a lunch pail Okay Yeah But the tagline was Duncan is for doers Doors

Yeah Doors isn't great No Doors is probably the worst word We've said Or some Doors It does sound

They're just It feels like there's a negative of connotation. Yeah, a bunch of doers. You're a doer. Look all those doers hanging around the bus stop. Yeah. Also, doers is a drink, but you. That's right. Yeah. It's not great.

Another guy, I forget exactly what his pitch was. We used to word brunch in it. And the head of Duncan really went off on him. He was like, permission to be blunt with you. Yes. Yeah, brunch. We don't like that. Brunch suggests slow. We're about fast.

We're speed here with our guests. No, he didn't, he didn't say customer. It's a guest. Guests. Yeah, yeah. And the guy was like, thank you, Mr.

Thank you, Duncan. I just like, the fact I got to pitch for Duncan Donuts. What are we called? Duncan Brunch. I mean,

just crumbled. Brunch donuts. Oh, I didn't mention, there's a really funny guy he's in his 60s, all right? Yeah.

This will be us someday. He's the wacky Indian social media expert. Yes. And he comes out and he's an ad and it's like a woman lying

on a car, eating the big burger. It says Duncan. Yeah. And the guy's like, there's no coffee in the poster. He's like, quick as a flash. No, uh, they were drinking coffee, but they dropped it before we took the picture. Ha, ha, ha. Got a big laugh.

Except from the executive. He was like, oh, he just had to sit and groove on it. He made a call to ice that day. Solve a little problem for me. Yeah. And then there's other ones, well, they're real bad. Like, one woman loves race cars. He was like,

how about race car duncan and it's like you know like it's a petrol tank oh yeah but instead of petrol's got coffee in it like a jerry can yeah they don't want to think about drinking coffee of a jerry can no no not good definitely not so the end of the episode is okay so they pick the two best ideas the two best ideas are the magic eight ball okay and the lunch pail really yeah but they change it up so is there just a lunch pail there's also a handbag as well of the ladies well not necessarily James I think you're that's a very old school

opinion there yeah for who should stay in the kitchen yeah making me doughnuts in the kitchen yeah

they put in my lunch pail instead of going to work or just sit on the couch I take my lunch pail and walk over to the TV and stream for 12 hours like fucking boogie

you're like I gotta go to work get lunch pail just go to the toilets I wear like a big raincoat on a hat you know like I'm in madmen yeah so that's the

first episode so yeah sorry so they make a fake Dunkin' Donuts store and they have on one side Dunkin' Donuts they have the Magic 8 ball your side the lunch pail handbag and the customers come in and have to pick which one

which they like but it's a big drama right because the guy who created lunchpail's like hey guys come over here and the woman's like yelling like no over here over here come out here so they just go to her right and the guy's like stoo he's like yeah he's not so laid back and cool

no no but you know what your lesson to us all he actually wins because he's a better idea because of the patriarchy probably yeah yeah and then Jimmy Fallon is like hey you won it's pretty cool isn't it's like yeah it's pretty good wouldn't be better if your parents are here yeah But my parents are all the way in like, what? Mom, Dad, and his mom and dad are there, surprising him.

That's nice. And you're like, we just were chatting to our friend Jimmy Fallon, and he says, you won the big prize. Yeah. Yeah, and then they all hug, all right, and they play happy music. That's cool. But then everyone's happy. And then they all have, you know what to do at the end?

They have some Dunkin. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's pretty cool. Duncan, what? What do they have? Donuts

And coffee And they all start dancing You know Celebrate good times Come on And Jimmy puts a little Something his coffee You know

Oh yeah Little Irish coffee Yeah And then he gets real dizzy And just falls over And everyone just ignores him Oh fucking Horatio sounds Good

That stupid fuck He always had to get His dick wet Didn't he Put his dick in the ink Uh Yeah so that's the first episode there. I'm going to watch it every

week. Good. I think it'll be good for you. I'm going to watch it live. I'm going to live stream. They have hashtags and you can live stream and talk to Jimmy. Yeah. And it's really him. Oh, it is. Yeah. It's definitely not some Indian and some you know, some fucking prison. Yeah. Yeah. And he's like

and I'm like, Jimmy Fallon, I just feel so scared. I feel like life's passing me by. Hello, I am Jimmy Fallon here. You are a cool dude. Thank you, Jimmy I put down the gun So are you going to watch it?

No Okay, well I'm not, I just go fuck myself down Yeah, you should That's the first sets we'll think You've said all day Well, you know what you might like now Before we talk about weapons

There's a new movie coming out called Pillion P-I-L-L-O-N Okay Wait to hear about this You remember Dudley Dudley Dersley Yes

Yeah imagine him But he's grown up now Right And he's a sad gay A sad gay Yeah A sad timid gay boy All right

He hangs out in clubs And drinks He's like No one wants to fuck Dudley You know Crying and that But then he meets Alexander

Alaskander Scarsgarde Yeah You got there Well done I didn't want to help you because it's the only way you learn. Exactly, yeah, yeah. If I get it wrong, you spray me your water.

Like a dog. Actually, speaking of dogs, all right, he becomes Scarsgaard's dog. Yeah, so it's a sub-Dom relationship where he does everything Scarsguard tells him do. And he literally, like, you know, permission to sit down, tells him stand up and all that, you know, makes him dress up in like this kind of gear

that he's got like a, hole where his ass is okay so he can be bent over and fucked whenever yeah whenever scars guard demands

I see yeah his take his magic wand yeah so it's like a romcom you're saying apparently it is I've heard

described as an erotic gay exploitation porno but written by Richard Curtis oh

yeah imagine that so it's charming and quirky from love actually yeah yeah so imagine da, it's like, oh, hello there,

I'm a cum dumpster I am, yeah? Oh, just spunk in my bloody mouth and piss on my face. It's actually set during Christmas. Wow. Merry Christmas, oh, my dad's coming over, can I wear something that doesn't reveal my anus? No. No. Oh, well, how awkward.

Oh, may I play with your jingle balls? No, no puns. Be quiet. Now you have to self-flageulate now It's punishment Yeah It's all whips and stuff

Wow Little Dudley So it's like Love action It's like 50 shades of grey But like British and gay British gay Christmas

All those things that you love You know You always say keep the Christ in Christmas Yeah Yeah Now Dudley's getting something In his Christmas Pudding

Sock Oh yeah Yeah He's getting some Coal in his sock You mean stocking? No. Is that a sock?

It's what I did. My Christmas cum sock filled with comb and coal. Clean coal, clean coal, clean cum. Yeah, I'm not very good at this, but yeah. Oh, you're great. So I'm looking forward to Pilgin. It's going to be a little Christmas treat.

And Scarsguard, is he... He is ripped in it. Well, yeah, he's ripped in it. And he's shirtless. Yeah. That's kind of his whole thing. You're right, actually, yeah. Being ripped.

It'd be more impressive he was real fat. Who plays the Dudley? Dudley. Oh, it's actually him? Yeah, yeah. What? Yeah. Henry Melling.

Oh. Why do you think I was calling him Dudley? I think it was just being mean? Yeah. No, I'd never do that. I never disrespect Dudley like that. I didn't realize he ever acted in anything else. He's back now.

He took some time off and he's like, I'm never acting again. When he gets phone calls, like, you want to get pegged by Scars Guard? You want to get pegged by Tarzan? He's like, Hey, bag out, I'm back in the saddle, literally. Fuckin' up.

Yeah, so Dudley's back. Well, that's good. Apparently, he could be up for an Oscar. All those, uh, all those evenings spent at Richard Griffith's house are paying off, you know? Uncle Monty. Yeah. I mean to have you, and if not my choice, I will have you through buggery. I'm probably butchering that, but God, what a great fellow.

You've got pretty close now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know your stuff. Very funny. Yeah, yeah. It's funny, goddamn, film. Well, Henry Melling's back. And not to bring this up, all right,

but his grandfather was the second doctor, all right? So just to throw that in there, you know? Okay, so he knows what it's like to be a gay freak. Okay, that's what you're saying. Actually, his granddad was the coolest cat. He did a thing that you can't really do these days, all right? He had multiple families. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. So he was just like, oh, goodbye, dear. I'm just going off to do some film Doctor Who. Yeah. And he just go off like literally in next town. he's got like another wife with other kids That's so weird Like why do people

What is the specific psychology of a man that does that? It is like wild Like I understand the idea of just you have it like Just a you know A bit on the side Does they call it you know Yeah A bit of a rough

But they have like two families going Yeah And a Christmas dinner Like oh it's got to go off Take a shoy And you run over to the other house Like oh yeah Lovely turkey

Oh I got to take a shoy But you're actually The mother of the other family so it's like a Mrs. Doubtfire thing, you know? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Hello! Just make it more complicated for you talking.

And you get mixed up like, Dad, why are you wearing a wig? Oh, I got to take a shoy. It's interesting. I could see you doing something like that. You know, I always think about this. I was like, does it. So like, Paschard Trout was his name, all right?

His mother didn't know she had extra grandkids. Yeah. Yeah. So his mother only taught he had one family And like one set of grandkids So there was definitely There was like the main family And then the other family were like the support act

Oh you hate that wouldn't you You're on the bench You're the understudy Yeah If one son in the family Comes out his gaze like All right pal It's your turn

I don't make the same mistake He did right You're right It must be pretty bad to be like The B team for a family You know yeah Yeah I was the B team team and my family.

And you only had one family. Exactly. Anyway, what are we talking about? Sorry, I've got to distract with Dr. Oh, we're going to talk about weapons. Oh, yeah, yeah. Let me just restart this.

We'll talk about weapons, all, one second there. Well, let's say you're, first of all, um, uh, good job. You think you can have a second family. You can't even do a second podcast episode without drop on the ball. Screw at the pooch. Alright, just keep talking Sorry, oh no, I've heard his feelings

Oh, he's angry now He's probably going to slash my tyres Like, oh, go on James, drive to Antrum Safe trip Enjoy using your brakes But I don't really know how cars work Alright, so I try to cut your brakes We just end up cut my finger off

Try, I'm bleeding Try braking now, idiot It's a teacher some respect Oh I tell you Let's do a Batman update Okay Real quick, all right So Batman update

So when I went The last thing we found out Was Killer Crocs got mental health issues Right So this episode, all right Of issue, all right Robin is out on patrol Okay

And he sees some corrupt cops Right Okay And he tries to stop the corrupt cops and they shoot them. Oh. Yeah. And they, oh, that's it. Yeah. So they're trying to stop these criminals and a cop gets shot. Yeah.

And then they shoot Robin. They're going to blame just to put Robin away. So he's not racked out the cops. Oh. They're going to be robin for the cop that got shot. Oh, I see. Yeah. It's pretty exciting, isn't it? And then Batman has to save Robin because Robbins is in the back of a paddy wagon. Yeah. And then but oh yeah, yeah. So

they stopped us. Okay. But Batman doesn't know the cops are bad. He doesn't know. He thinks his misunderstandings. He's like, sorry, officer. You know, he's doing, like, the Adam West. Like, ah, officer, my old chum there, shouldn't be arrested, yeah.

He should not be locked up with the Mexicans, old chum. He's clearly a Caucasian superhero. So, but he's not suspecting the cop. So the cop shoots him in the head. Batman? Yeah, yeah. Now, he's wearing his mask, all right? Yeah.

So he doesn't die, but he still gets his bell wrong. Yeah, yeah. Batman's proper, like, I'm going to be sick. Oh, God, I've got an inner ear infection. You know, he's all dizzy in there. Was that a swipe at me, was it? No, yeah, you're like fucking Batman. No, so then Robin, while bleeding out, has to drag his old chum into the Batmobile.

Right. And he has to drive the Batmobile, okay? Oh. He's never a driven stick. Oh. Yeah. And the Batmobile has 13 gears. Jesus

Yeah Hell yeah So now Picture that So Robin's got A drive home He almost crashes The Batmobile

And now In Gotham City All the cops are told Robin's a cop killer Yeah And Batman is an accomplice Wow So now what's gonna happen

The mayor He said You know Gotham's most wanted Batman and Robin Crazy stuff I know it is insane You're on the edge of your seat Oh man

I can't That's why he doesn't have time to read the news or anything people talk about the election i don't have time for this what about jim gavin i know what's his batman policy i'm more interested in jim gordon oh yeah i told you jim gordon's being busted down to um he's a beat cop he's a beat cop yeah he's got like clean the toilets that's what beat cops do i think yeah no the beat cop is he has to jerk off the hobos he goes around all the homeless people and jerks them off so they have sexual release so that reduces

the likelihood of them committing sexual assaults. That's what a beat cop does, Brian. This is what I got in this game for. My grandfather was a cop. My dad was a cop. That's what Blue Bloods is all about, yeah. Blue Balls. Hey! There we go. No. No, it wasn't.

And you know what it is? I ruined it because I said blue balls and I laughed. You shouldn't laugh at your own jokes. Yeah. Fuck in. Yeah. Well, I'm glad you're upset. That makes me feel better. I might get a yogurt. after this. Oh. I'm debating about going home. To Carlo?

Yeah. I'm kind of scared. I might check at my daddy. Daddy, it's windy. Nighttime driving. Yeah. And using the wipers as well, that's bad. Is it? My dad said he shouldn't use the wipers. Ever? No, especially when it's raining. Even in the wind shield is just caked and shit and muck.

You can't see anything. Yeah. Yeah. My dad says I shouldn't use the wipers or use the lights, okay, on my car at night. Or the radio. or the radio that drains the power like fuck right but I'm like I want to listen to Pat Kenny that's what the alternators for though

what the alternator I don't speak Latin oh what the fuck you're talking about English do you speak it the alternator when the engine is turned on the alternator is the thing that keeps the battery so the battery will never drain

when you're driving or when the engine's on. Wow. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. But that's not what my daddy said. My daddy says, I'm gay. Yeah.

But the alternator. It's your alternator, yeah. Let's talk about weapons now, right? Now, I actually genuinely want to talk about weapons. I actually wish you weren't recording. Okay. Because that's kind of sullies it. Yeah.

Cheapens it. Yeah. We have to commodify everything. Dude. It's like when you go see a. brazzers, like, oh, you don't want my money. This is out of love. Hey, I'll talk to you about weapons for half an hour.

You know, like, I get a prostitute for half an hour. It's like, we still got 29 minutes and five seconds. Let's talk about Josh Brolin. Yeah. So, I watch weapons. And normally you watch a movie, I like to, like, you know, read some reviews. You know, watch some videos about it. Watch those, like, you know those videos that are like,

what really happened in weapons? The things that you miss. in weapons. See when the kids go missing then the parents are sad that is an allegory for parents being sad when your kids go missing. Benedict Wong is Asian but he didn't notice that did you?

Yeah, yeah. There's he's all, there's so many Wong things about him, you know what I mean? That's cheap. Sorry, yeah, sorry. Now, man, we dodged a bullet by the way, just before we get into this. So weapons was initially going to be made before the Hollywood

strike. Right. And it's going to be Pedro Pascal. Oh, God. Yeah. And I think, yeah, it was none, we got a whole new cast because of the strike, okay? We would have got no, uh, what's her name, the woman? Julie. Julie Garner, is there? Uh, Jennifer Garner or whatever, okay, yeah. So, oh, well,

Julie Garner, yeah. So we would have got no Ben Dick Wong, we would have got none of that, right? So I love the movie, first of all. Yes, so did I. I haven't really taught about what it means too much. Mm-hmm. Now, I know he could probably off top of my head you could say it's about

I think the three things are school shootings yeah sexual abuse or the other one I forget now which one do you think it is

out of a tree well school shootings definitely you know it's called weapons what was the other one now it was good oh I would have blown you away yeah yeah

this is why I have no commode I'm just male sitting here like What do you think is about? Okay, yeah So the school shooting thing Definitely makes a lot of sense Sorry, sorry, sorry interrupt, okay By want to interrupt

Okay Alcoholism Okay, well she is an alcoholic Oh yeah Yeah I'm not very good at this This whole film You know, reviewing thing

Obviously it was the movie made after his friend died so you know the themes of grief are pretty evident there as well let's talk about the plot and we'll think of the meaning during it right so we start off grabs your attention straight away no

actually I do want to have to say real quick Benedict Wong he's the principal and he has a male roommate and they're very good friends yeah yeah exactly that's all that's all they intended exactly and you could probably read into it Yeah, yeah.

Clutching at straws. Yeah, I didn't get anything about that, yeah. Because it didn't kiss or anything, did they? No. Unless my brain just edited that part out. Well, it does it automatically. Yeah. Like, I watch Brokeback Mountain.

It's just a regular Western. Couple of lads. Yeah. Having a nice camp out on the mountain. Sometimes you got a spit on something. I don't know what it was, but you... When you watched cruising with Al Pacino, it's like, look at all these eligible bachelors,

looking for a lucky damed. to make their steady gal. I feel bad for these guys. All the clubs they go to it, there's no chicks. It's a total sausage test. Too many dicks on the dance floor. Too many dicks. So, the plot.

The plot, okay, starts off. The premise is, you must know this stage, the kind of thing that grabs your attention is. 2.17 at night, all the kids in one woman's classrooms, except for one. Except for one. All got up and ran out of their rooms.

into the darkness and we're never seen again. Yeah. Cut to one month later, all right? People are still dumbfounded by this. Yeah.

They don't know how to process this, don't know how to grieve or if they should grieve even and they all blame this woman, Julie, the teacher and think she must have had something to do with it. Because it's only her classroom.

Exactly. Yeah, yeah. And the next, and what I didn't mention is this is kind of told two different points of view. Yes. Which I thought was really cool, you know.

Yeah, it was well done. Simple but well done. It didn't overly do it, you know, but well done. So there's different stories. So it's obviously Julie, first of all. Yep. She seems to be a semi-good teacher. Yes.

What do you think about her? Like, you know, she does some things that, you know, by the book isn't great. Like, you know, she'll drive a kid home. Yeah, she'll kind of crosses the boundaries of professionalism. Yeah. So if a kid is crying, she'll hug the kid. Yeah, give them a little smooch, you know. There's something I'd never do again.

Oh, because they were really, oh, my God. They rake you over the colds for it, don't they? My belt wasn't working. I have a faulty belt, okay? So sometimes my pants fall down. Because they don't pay teachers enough or subs or volunteers like I was that day. Volunteer teacher, okay? Like Kyle Rittenhouse, all right?

I volunteer a gun, right? It's keeping a kid safe because I don't want weapons to happen in real life. You kids Hanging around the kids Like 2-17 You better not run away Anytime I see a white woman Get near

They're like Back it up bitch All right Witch Yeah But what was your question I didn't have a question I was just saying

Like so She stressed Oh yeah So I read one thing I read it It was interesting All right Where they were all

Prode his teacher And they taught Bendick Wong Was being very mean to her Because he was saying you can't hug students and you can't drive them home

if they miss the bus. I think he's just doing it by the bus. I think, yeah, he's very much in the right. Especially nowadays, the whole thing with, like, teachers and students, any kind of inappropriate, like you've got to keep it as professional and platonic as possible.

If I was teacher, I wouldn't make eye contact with the kids. Basically treat them like they're homeless people. Don't just ignore them. Yeah, even worse, I would wear a chastity belt to teach her all times. This is a case one of those kids getting a, with their sticky fingers.

Like, a kid, like, drops a pen. Yeah. Oh, no, I drop a pen. I'm like, you pick it up. I'm not bending down in front of you. You're animals. What happens? The kid bends over and then just here,

bing! Like a metallic clang. What was that noise? Oh, nothing. You got what's happening there? Do you get it? See what is yet? So,

Um, so she has, um, so, oh, we also find out that she's being expelled from other, uh, schools. Yeah. She got, I think she got a D-U-Y and she got in a relationship with a staff member. Yeah. Yeah. Um, so she's a little bit frazzled, more than frazzled. She's a little bit upset by this, you know, by the whole town hating her. I think she's a witch.

Yes, because all of the children disappeared. So she has, uh, done what we all do in times of needs. We go to the shop get vodka. Glug, glug, glug. She's drinking, and she wants to restart a relationship with her... Seems to be, like, ex or a fuck buddy or such a... Ex-boyfriend, he's a cop. Yeah, yeah.

It's just very... It's interesting what they don't say and what do say, you know? So, we get to sense that she in the past has been very clingy. Yeah. Or something like, you know, she's like, oh, I won't be texting all the time. You know, is this, like, the fact she needs to say that, says that she's... She's probably... Yeah, she got some issues.

She's definitely... They're drinking and even their... her stepping over the lines in work. You can tell she's a person that maybe doesn't appreciate boundaries as well. They don't say it, but maybe in the past she was drinking on the job, maybe like

this alcohol issue maybe wasn't just started by the kids going missing. But like there are multiple scenes where she's just like driving around. She's got like a big gulp and she's like tipping vodka into it, you know? It's like, that's pretty clever. I fell in love with her and said

This chick's a real hang Officer It's just a big god What's the problem? And also she wants to talk to the kid Who wasn't didn't vanish Right And again Ben Dick Wong is like

No don't do that This kid's been fucking questioned by Everyone from the cop to the FBI Don't harass this kid She's like I hear you A little big gulp for courage I understand

saying And what you're not Saying So she's like I know what I'll do I'll just Go to the kid's house And look in his windows

Yes Just like a You know Like a caring teacher Always does And then she sees weird stuff In the house Yeah

The parents are just Both sat on the living room Motionless Frozen Yeah Yeah And the next Character we follow

Is Josh Brolin Who's great in this He's great Yeah I kept thinking whole time, it could have been Pedro Pascal. We really dodged the bullet there. True, yeah.

No offense to Pedro, but he wouldn't have been good in this. He wouldn't be as good as Josh Brolin. No, Josh Brolin definitely works a lot better. Way better, yeah. Because you know what is? I think you can kind of see with Brolin, there's a sense that he could snap more. He don't know exactly where he's going to go. He's under a lot of stress, obviously,

with the sun missing. Yeah, things are going right. He owns a construction company. Yeah, and he's like ordering all the wrong stuff. Like, they want him to order like five doors. He gets five simians instead. Well, look, if they don't want it, you know. Well, what you do is on the simulant, I'm sorry, I'm still processing my son.

Just put it in the playroom. The kids will have a ball. Now, do you think, again, spoilers, what do you think was going on with him and his son? Was there anything happening there? Oh, like, is it inappropriate? No, no, no, no. I just mean like, so, for example,

there's a whole thing where, like, He has a dream with his son in it. Yeah. And he's kind of employed that he never said he loved his son. Yes, yeah. And also the son is a bully as well. Yeah, that's what I was mentioning. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It seems like he kind of knew the son was maybe a bully. Yeah. Yeah, I guess he probably just wasn't affectionate and he's probably very stark. Because, you know, he's a construction worker. He's an old school guy. Yeah. You know, my dad didn't tell me that he loved me or my mom or anyone in my life, really. You should have ran away.

Yeah. Yeah, he does. You can do it now. I'd do the Naruto run, you know? Just run out of your house at age, whatever age of it. 217.

Yeah. Goodbye, mother. So he becomes kind of obsessive with the case and he's trying to track where the kids are running. Yeah, he gets very like

CSI with it, you know. Oh, so you get sense of the cops aren't really doing that. The cops are kind of like, well, we don't see him. So. we're stumped They're still missing then

I guess Well if you kids show up Ask them if they're missing I don't know I'm not paying enough For this shite okay Yeah yeah So he is trying to track down

He's going to people's houses To get their ring bell footage Get a nice little Justin Long cameo Oh yeah I saw that Yeah For the longaholics like us

I get a nice little Long Island ice tea Hey there we go And um Long dressed like long John Silver and then we drive

and then we drive to Long Ford Yeah That's it now No more Don't do another one I had another one What was it

I was gonna listen To Longview By Green Day Great son Well I don't get that So it's not funny Oh okay And no one gets that

No one likes Green Day Fucking indie band You know Fucking shite band It's more pop pop punk But all right Anyway Yeah well

DeVorn the Simpsons movie weren't they? That's right. Oh man, you hear about Simpsons movie? There's a new one coming.

Yeah. In 2027. Giving us time to mentally prepare. I'm going to paint myself yellow. Yeah, I can't.

Like Charlie Kirk's corpse. Are you excited for a Simpson movie too? No. Why not? Because it's gonna suck. Simpson movie one was awesome. Was it?

Man, you don't remember Spider Pig? Yeah, I remember and Bart's penis? I didn't like, yeah, well. I bet you like that,

do you? No. Oh? No. overreacted there yeah yeah I don't know what would you do

for Simpson's movie too if Matt Groening came to you was like please James Marge is in the hospice oh man fucking Marge Simpson's voice you know

like if you were trying to picture Marge Simpson from the voice alone you would picture of the old hag from weapons yeah she's got the I They're going to have to fix her voice using AI.

Man, I think that's the one part. Like, every, you know, artist in the world would unanimously agree. Yeah, use AI for her voice. I know we're not supposed to, you know, let AI take our jobs. What do me? I sound great. Oh, Jesus. But anyway, back to weapons.

Weapons, yeah. Yeah. So he is, again, people think he's going to be crazy, you know. When you got, in your. basement a map and you know with pins and you know stuff you know red twine that means things are going well for you yes yes and then uh forgive me i'm kind of losing track a little bit so the next thing is he then sees julie garner yeah who he blames for this or he assumes and that's when bendig Wong attacks just comes running up out of nowhere blood in his mouth I loved his eyes in

it yeah his eyes were bugging I love it yeah yeah like he was tweaking blah it is like uh like a cartoon almost his eyes. Yeah, I was wondering if they did something with that or just like special effects or a little bit extra CGI or something. Probably, yeah. You get to sense that these guys will go into Y in a minute, but like, when they're under control they're like, what the fuck am I doing? You know, they're like, you know,

they're being used as a weapon. Yes. Very good. Very good. Thank you. We did three takes. I got it wrong both times and he beat me with his belt. Yeah. Being used as a Simpsons movie.

Green Day Fucking idiot So Who's the next story now Is it the cop? Alden Emberick Okay He's Han Solo

Oh Well he was also in Burn After Reading Very good in that Oh okay Yeah yeah Good actor Like can you know He always

I always feel a bit sorry for him Because he got the hand solo thing He was like Yeah The big break And everyone fucking hated that Yeah Like you're not Harrison Ford

I'm sorry I never said I was. Yeah, you should be fucking sorry. Yeah, yeah. But anyway, he's the cop and he, oh, he has a missus. Yeah, very hot. Yeah. Giant tits.

Oh, yeah. You know who she is married to in real life? Paul Shear, the bald guy from the league. Wow. Doesn't that just... That's not good, is it? I think it's great. Is it?

Maybe if I shaved my head and... And fuck up your teeth. Yeah, yeah. And lose about it. about a hundred and twenty pounds yeah i could get a chick with bit oh man she's very i don't like that i like beautiful people beautiful people yeah i like ugly people ugly people that's like my form of apartheid mm-hmm there we go yeah i just don't like and should have separate fountains as well i just i just don't like when they cross to like when i see a beautiful woman where a guy who

looks like me yeah i go into like a raid i'm like bend like running at them Yeah, I don't like that now But anyway But anyway, so You take over here I'm kind of losing track Okay, so then as again As you said

When we cut to different points of view Different characters We kind of get the same story From their perspective And sometimes same scenes Yeah, yeah So him and Julie Garner They were like X thing

But they meet up, they fuck And you know The wife is very unhappy Or, yeah, his wife actually attacks Julie Garner. Oh, because also, he's a recovering alcoholic. Yeah. He was sober and hooking up at her. He went back on the sauce.

Yeah. So happens. Yeah. But also, shit, I forgot. His, so his wife is the daughter of the police chief. Yes, and they want to have a baby. Yeah. She's doing the whole, like, I'm ovulating now, fill me up.

He's like, yeah, I'll be back in a minute. I've got to go to the bar. Yeah. And he tells Judy Garner that he's not with her. Moore. Yes. Oh god the lies in the exception here. It's crazy. And then he tries to arrest a kind of like

a junkie. A bit of a Jason Muse type. Yeah, yeah. Like a Jay. His name was James, actually. I honestly think it's probably maybe a connection to it. Were we so cool, you know the shop. Imagine it's a quick stop. Ah, yeah. Snoochie boochies. And then they meet Holden. Yeah. Played by

Ben Affleck. Right. And then they find out they're making a movie and they got to go to Hollywood to stop. And they meet Blunt man and chronic. Yeah. And the script write to self. Blood man and cronics saved the 19 kids or however many it was. Wee. Yeah, yeah.

So, what was it? So he's trying to arrest this, and it's a very kind of what I felt like a real scene. He's trying to arrest this guy's on drugs. He'd be fucking annoyed. He puts his hand in the pocket, gets hit by, stung by needle. And he's literally the first, because every cop says this with the frisk you, it's like, do you have anything

in your pocket that could stick me? And the guy goes, no, no, sticks his hand in the fucking heroin needle. Now he's got the, potentially he's got AIDS. Yeah, yeah. And then he reacts, so maybe he shouldn't do, but like I probably would react, you know, you punch the guy, yeah, and of course

it's a fucking, it's on video. The dash cams there, it's a great little seat, so he just punches them, knocks him out, and then it goes, oh shit. Yeah. And then he's like, okay, you're getting up now, you're fine, you're fine. I really related that, because I think I told you before, in Dundalk once I hit a guy with my car.

Really? Yeah, I clipped the guy in a bike. He was a young fella all right. Yeah. And I hit him and it was his fault completely. There we go. Yeah. There? Yeah. And I'll say that in court. You back me up in court. I will. You were there, weren't you? You saw the whole thing.

I was riding shotgun, Your Honor. No, you're in the front like E.T. No, so I clipped him all right. He fell down. I got up and I was panicking and I was like, ah, look, you're okay, aren't you? Yeah, you're okay. And he's like, oh. Oh, Dizzy. Ah, you're okay.

Look at you, your feet is a fiddle. I can't taste anything anymore. Whoa, what's that ringing? Ah, look at you know, a bit of a little scrape. You're young and full of piss and vinegar. Off you go, off you go. I just drove off real fast down. And he's like on the road, like, help!

And then it destroyed the footage. Oh, fuck, well. Yeah, and I'm sure he was grand. I'm sure he was. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. So, yeah, I mean, you could have really got in trouble there. No.

No? No, I just pull some strings. It's in Dundalk. They barely count his people, you know. Hear about that triple murder in Louth, actually? Oh, what was the crack with that? One lad, he murdered his parents and special needs brother. Well, something to aspire to there.

No, no. Apparently, but, like, he was with a knife, he, like, butcher them. And then when he was done, he went outside, and he just, the neighbours were there. And he goes, sorry for. all the noise, but it's over now and he was covered in blood. Very that's very cinematic. Very fucking yeah. That's like the start of like

Criminal Minds episode. Literally, yeah. He's like, take me officer when he's in prison, he's like he's all part of the plan. Officer, I think you'll find. But then, yeah, we've written episode already, okay? Because it's like, you think

he killed the whole family? He was like, hey, what, you're the baby brother? Where is it? I'll help you find him if you solve the riddle's tree. What's in Brooke but what, not in canal? Is he in the boot of your car? No!

Don't lock there, but no! We hear crying from the boot. What has three legs and then four? Okay, back to weapons, right? So then he's worried about that.

I didn't realize how it works, so if no one files a police brutality report, after a month, the body can footage gets like deleted yeah yeah uh it's pretty handy isn't it yeah well you got to think of like storage like they're if it's filming 24-7 yeah yeah no i'm just like you know i think should be a day every 20 minutes or so you know um but we know how long to take george fly every uh eight and a half minutes you know this is the page no it's not the free one this the free one oh no well

oh boy well much like the body cam footage maybe That could get deleted. Nah, whatever. Who cares? Oh, I'm making a comment about racist cops killing people. And I'm the bad guy. You got to cut that out now.

We don't want to offend the cops. That's ruin, yeah, you're going to ruin our brand. Because I go to like, what do you call it, like the police man's ball. Yeah. Yeah, and I don't want them, it'd be awkward, you know.

Sure. But anyway, so we then cut to the junkie, all right. You tell us what happened there. Yeah, so he's just like a junkie living in a tent. He's kind of going around trying to steal like shit out of cars. And like selling

shit at the store and he's harassing people you know. So then we get the cop's perspective like you know the cop thing from his perspective like he gets chased and then punched and blah blah. So then he finds something in a car. He goes to a pawn shop and he sees

the reward. The reward for the missing kids. But then how does he, he tries to break into. He tries to break first and it goes wrong you know he sees like it's weird the parents and all that like the statues all right and then he

runs away and he thinks he sees aunt gladys who will gladys we'll get to in a minute all right but he did see the kids in the basement so he knows that the kids missing kids are in the basement of this house he's freaked out by that and then he hides his tent and someone's

opening it and we think it's like a monster or something I thought it was going to be a werewolf or a Dracula or something Frankenstein Or a Democrat Oh That's good I couldn't think of any better than that

Yeah Yeah Or people before profit Yeah They'll all be intense If they have their way We'll all be sleeping intense Well the Muslims

Yuck it up In their mansions Eating their caviar You know Their halal caviar Yeah Yeah So it's actually the cop

All right And the cop and the junkie Go to the house Yes The cop walks into the house And we cut then To Bendic Wong Yes

What happened then That's That Bendic Wong Is when Aunt Gladys Oh yeah Actually instead of just Describing more of this Alright

I want to hear first of all What do you think about The villain Alright And her spells and all that The whole like Magic Realism element of it Yeah what you think of it

I mean I thought it was cool It works You know I'm honestly I'm not too sure What it means or what it's an allegory for.

I just love the fact that they don't actually properly explain it. Yeah. But it feels like there's a, in turn, there's a logic there that we just don't have the full picture of. Yeah, I think if you, if I rewatched it, I'd probably get more from it. You get like, okay, you need the hair for that. Yeah, yeah. To hunt the people, you get, yeah.

And the first time you're watching it, there is a lot of, because it's the initial mystery of what happened to these kids. Yeah, yeah. And then when you see them, but then you find out, you see this. Aunt Gladys and the way she puts spells on people and the hair and the branch of the whole thing. It's kind of like, wait, what is that name? It's enough for you to follow what's going on that when at the end of the film, when the kid does it,

you understand like, oh, that's all you need, all right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love this, I forget what film is. I think it's sinister. Oh, yeah, with Ethan Hawke. Yeah, yeah, but there's a bit in that, if I remember correctly, where they have a Zoom with, like, Vincent Ophrio, and he's, like, explaining what the monster is. Right.

We didn't need that. Right, yeah. We could have very easily got a thing where Josh Brolin goes to library and it's like, hey, there's a thing every nine years kids go missing. The spooketus,

smoketus of the ancient Samerian tribes. And there's like a picture of like from 1817 and Gladys there'd be like, hey, how wow. Yeah, yeah. Oh, and they could have been real bad I was like, the Limburg baby,

oh, you know. Madeline McCann. No. Yeah, the Scottish family Like, we told you. I fucking do you, Paul. You fucking thought

he were a daft gun. So, basically, long story short, right? Yeah. The, Bendic Wong attacks

Julie, right? I love that scene. That was so good, you know, just how fucking crazy is and then he just run,

they gets hit by car, you know? Yeah, yeah. And then it's kind of like a team up then, like a bully cop thing where it's Josh Brolin and Julie Gardner. Yeah, yeah.

And they got a, take out the trash so then they go to the house they find out the house is like of the kid who's Alex was it whatever okay oh yeah yeah the kid that didn't go that's almost like

that's like the center of all this okay so they go to the house and then they get attacked by Aunt Gladys okay and the cop is there he gets killed

the junkie gets killed the witch and Gladys who yeah she used their spell to make Josh Brolin evil but then The kid uses quick tinkin.

Yeah. So it's like, she has these branches from this little tree that she grows herself. Yeah, yeah. So she takes the hair from a person, wraps it around the branch. And when she snaps the branch, that makes the person who owned the hair fall under the spell. Yeah. She has complete control over it. Yeah, yeah.

And also, she, she, what was it now, she drains the life force? Yes, to make herself. healthy and strong. So basically all these kids is like, fucking loads of batteries for her. And she's very greedy. You could take like three kids to be grand. She just took way too many, all right? Well, you know,

better safe. Stalk off. Yeah, better safe and sorry. The way of the American healthcare system, and the price of milk. So she takes all the kids and she has them in the attic like as a battery. Like I said, yeah. So again, it kind of makes sense, you know. I don't need it to explain too much. Yeah. I'm

sure there are plenty of videos at Breakett. Oh, man, there's so much stuff. Like, have you seen the thing where, you know when Josh Brolin's dream, he sees a gun over the house? Yeah, yeah. Says 2.17. Right. No, it didn't say two, uh, the two dots 17, all right? Right.

So, 217. And someone was saying on Reddit, this could be bullshit, right? That's how many mass shootings were in a certain year? Oh, I didn't even hear that. No, I heard it was, there was a vote against guns and 217 people voted against it. Oh, okay. Yeah, I didn't even know that. Yeah.

Now that could be complete nonsense And it probably is And what I like about Zach Kregor Is he asked him about the gun And he was like Yeah, I just, you know I felt like you put it there Don't really know what I means

But looked cool Yeah I'll be honest That was high as shit I was like big gun Yeah Fucking nice Clash

Yeah I wanted the gun to go Go off you know Now big tits there Yeah I wanted some big titted Hoar to be holding the gun But the studio Big Wigs said it was like

Sexist or some dumb shit And then the grapeest comes along. So at the end, the kind of final thing is the kid basically does a reverse Uno on the witch, Gladys, okay, and takes her hair and then turns the kids against her. Yeah. Their weapons. Did you like that scene?

Oh, it was very funny. Loved it. I laughed. I was loving it. I was great. I wish it saw in the cinemas. I loved it, yeah. So when she's just running away, she's like,

all these kids are chis. I love how she was so like, oh, gee. There was no like been foiled It was very comical Yeah Yeah And the kids are

Again Almost like the Terminator They're going through Windows Yeah and walls It's just crashing through everything And then they all grab her

And just like Rip her Literally limb They Dave to dead her Like chow on it You know They rip her I loved as well

So they Rip a fucking woman To pieces For an average person Who's like Walking a dog Like what the fuck

Rip a woman To piece is that right and then all the kids are there and they take the kids and they're like well we found them so hooray job done yeah and all the kids

some of them maybe start talking yeah and then it ends yeah we never get to see that they're recovering or yeah we don't know it's almost like there's like a very abrupt ending that is not a happy ending

it's a happyish ending we don't get like the scene of Julie's like you know in AA being like and that's why stop drinking. Yeah. And then like Josh Brolin, like building the house

and he gets his son to put the final nail in, you know? And he's like, you know what, son? I never said it, but I do love you. Thanks, Dad. Yeah. Wouldn't that be nice if someone said that to me? But no, that's never going to happen. No, stop.

I'm glad you know that. Yeah. Yeah. A notice as well, the narrator. We never saw the narrator. Oh, yeah. We just have to assume that it was one of the kids. that's right yeah maybe it wasn't

I don't know yeah it was yeah it was a little girl wasn't it yeah yeah because then I thought maybe it was Alex but Alex is a boy maybe that's why

Josh Brolin never said I love you Daddy I'm wearing pants I mean not pants I'm wearing a dress Friday and slip there be of an Ed Gein so yeah we're gonna well you're going off

I'm gonna watch Ed Gein I'll watch Ed Gein on the drive you know Yeah, yeah These cars basically drive themselves now Especially with the wind and all that Yeah, it'll just blow it along Make it easier I'll get a bed sheet

Put a sail up, you know And I'm up at the top Landahoy A Starboard That's not Starboard You idiot What's this starboard and seam Port and Starboard

Yeah, that's it Yeah, yeah You I will watch actually Have you heard of White Squall No So White Squall Is based in a real movie It's I think

Jeff Bridges, the end of the minute, don't worry. It's what time were you? Oh, I'm just, no, I'm just one round. Don't worry, you got time. Let me finish this off. All right. Let me finish off and then I won't finish you off, all right? So it's Jeff Bridges, okay?

And it's him, he's a sailor, and he brings all these boys out. Mm-hmm. Okay. And then kind of like, it's the perfect storm. Right. You know, the Mark Wahlberg film. It's like, they sailed out and they never came back. Oh.

It's like that. But apparently white squalls is a big Q-in-on movie. really yeah there's all this Q and on stuff in the film hell yeah now forgive me I've forgotten what the Q&N stuff is okay it's all the symbolism

it's kind of like snake eyes with Charlie Kirk the Q drops but it is very important in the in the Q mythology well I'm surprised I haven't heard of it yeah dropping the ball aren't you I am what are you watching fucking

I was watching Mind Hunter there I said pretty good pretty good yeah can't can't can't talk shit Anyway. Anyway, so I'm going to get yogurt now, guys. I'm going to check a pace. And next week, we will do something else.

We will. Probably Ed Geen. Yes, Ed Geen, that's it. Bye. All right, goodbye.